Yannis Pappas Hour - Ye by the Fireplace

Episode Date: October 22, 2022

Kanye take incoming. Netflix is fighting back against Andrew Schulz and more. Sponsors https://trueclassictees.comPromo code fumes Draft kingshttps://www.draftkings.comWatch Yanni’s stand up special: https://youtu.be/ArlCFemEDvQJoin our Patreon for hilarious bonus episodes each week: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysJoin our highlights page for podcast highlight clips: https://youtube.com/channel/UCfMy34qIYYy7XiRaHKO1ykwLongdays is your news show that’s not news. Come cheat on your beliefs with the delicious maniac. New episodes every Saturday and new bonus every Thursday on Patreon.com/yannilongdaysIf you or someone you know has a gambling problem, crisis counseling and referral services can be accessed by calling 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) (IL/IN/LA/MI/NJ/TN/PA/WV/WY), 1-800-NEXT STEP (AZ), 1-800-522-4700 (CO/KS/NH), 888-789-7777/visit ccpg.org (CT), 1-800-BETS OFF (IA), 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY), visit OPGR.org (OR), or 1-888-532-3500 (VA).21+ (18+ NH/WY). Physically present in AZ/CO/CT/IL/IN/IA/KS/LA(select parishes)/MI/NH/NJ/ NY/OR/PA/TN/VA/WV/WY only. $200 in Free bets: New customers only. Min. $5 deposit. Min $5 pregame moneyline bet. $200 issued as eight (8) $25 free bets. Bet must win. Ends 1/8/23 @ 8pm. Risk-Free Stepped Up SGP: 1 Token issued per eligible game. Opt in req. Min $1 bet. Max bet limits apply. Min. 3-leg. Each leg min. -300 odds, total bet +100 odds or longer. Ends at start of final game of the 2022-2023 NBA Season. See eligibility & terms at sportsbook.draftkings.com/basketballterms. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We are coming to you live indoors from America, right outside the building from Mexico, as Mexican workers are crawling on the exterior of the building right now. So if you hear some bachata or some salsa and some banging, just know that the exterior of this building is now Mexican territory, and the bricks between us and them is the poorest border. So if a Mexican comes crashing through this window, just know that he'll be sent up to New York City by bus to live in a sanctuary city in the ongoing war between liberal and conservative states over immigration. This is Long Days. We got a great week of stories for you here today on the news channel that's not news the delicious mania that has become known as the summer solstice in scandinavia baby

it's sunshine all day long and rain all night long we're nyani's at the helm he's at the mic you know what i do i cheat on nia Long and I get a year's suspension because I'm the head coach of Puss Puss. Kanye West, baby, he's found a way to get himself back into the news. There's only one way to do that in 2022. Go after the Jews. That train's never late, sweetheart. SpaceX.

Elon Musk says says you know what I don't know if I'm footing the bill for Starlink's anymore and I'm not asking the Pentagon for money for it anymore either

now this type of conflict happens all the time between couples that are about to get a divorce I'm not paying for that I'm not paying for that

I'm not paying for that I'm not paying for that guess what we just gotta figure out which one is the moneymaker in this couple, and I guarantee you they will end up footing the bill for Starlink, which is the free Wi-Fi for Ukraine. Hey, listen. Ukrainian soldiers got to jerk off to tranny porn too without buffering.

I don't know how good the 5G is over there, but definitely you don't want any buffering when you're jerking off to the trans porn. Tulsi Gabbard has switched to the Republican Party. I don't know who could have seen that coming. I thought she already was a Republican. I was surprised to find out she was a Democrat. And her first move after switching from

Democrat to Republican was to go on the Joe Rogan podcast. Second move was to call Biden Hitler. So welcome to the Republican Party. Tulsi Gabbard. She's already practicing their most moderate talking points.

Netflix is back up. They're back up, guys. The war between Netflix and Andrew Schultz continues. And it looks like Netflix has won game six. We'll see what happens in game seven between Andrew Schultz and Netflix. Will Netflix be done? Or will they recover and be back to Mr. Beast? Andrew Schultz coalition of user-generated content and photographs.

What do they call those? Thumbnails where everyone looks very surprised. What's up, YouTube? Hold up. Thumbnail me. Well, we use them too because if you can't beat them, join them. This is long days. I hope none of us could beat them.

Join them. And by join them, I mean join NATO, Ukraine. Down is Bob's. Yeah. Here we go. All right, so here we are listening to a Spanish conversation happening right outside my window by guys who are fixing the bricks on the exterior of the building. We have one Spanish guy in here, Jared Harvin, who can't understand a word of it. Can't understand a word of it. Can't understand a word of it. So we have no idea whether they're talking about us or not. They could be. We don't know.

There's a language barrier. But we can hear it right through the window. And the thing about Mexicans is if you hear it, it's just fun. If Jesse turns on his mic, you're definitely going to be able to hear it. You may not be able to hear it through mine, but we can hear it loud and clear.

This is exactly what it feels like to live in El Paso. Yes. You know, there's people who go into their backyard in El Paso, Texas, and they just hear, And they're hearing me right now going, what's going on in there? Yeah, the studio is now the Alamo. Yeah. This is really what it feels like to live in a border town of Mexico right now.

It's very funny. That must be very funny because there are two very different cultures right down there. I mean, of course, there's a lot of Mexican-Americans in Texas, but I'm sure in some of those border towns, you got like some Texas good old boys just right on the border going outside to have their grits in the morning with a black coffee, probably still Sanka, a Sanka and a black coffee, and maybe a Best Western pancake that they went into and pretended like they were staying at the hotel to get a free breakfast and then it came back to their backyard right they were probably sitting on a fold-out metal chair i imagine a lot of backyards on the border of mexico have a lot of full like public school fold-out chairs out there if i go to a barbecue in texas on the mexican border i think

there's a good chance i'll be sitting on one of those chairs. So there's a good old boy right now somewhere sitting down in the morning to enjoy that breakfast pancake he just stole from a Best Western, and he just hears Mexican chatter 10 yards beyond the brush. And he's going, is that a bobcat? No. That is the Casantos Cartel warring and they have wars right there on the border look at that right there it's right that those borders it's hilarious it's like

right two different countries it's like when you go to canada and you're up in upstate new york and they're like you know you go to some uh you go to like a you know a new paltz mall and you see some 800 pound american guy walking to the chinese buffet and then you drive 10 minutes and they're like bonsoir and you're like that's weird that's a little weird man that's a little weird it's just weird because america's so big we never think about other countries being on our border you know people in europe deal with that shit all the time you know there's people in france and paris who wake up every day and there's just a bunch of drunk london stag party guys going like where are prostitutes let's get a pub let's get a pub and get a i would like to get yourself a

start i don't want to get i would like to get an alian prostitute. I heard it cheaper. And they go, excuse me, Pierre. Where are the prostitutes? My buddies here are getting married. We're on stag party from Liverpool. And the Paris people are going, oh, please. There's going to be some French terrorists that blow up that fucking English Channel tunnel. Because, you know, there's a two-hour train

that goes from London to Paris. And I bet you the Parisianers were more upset about it than the Londoners. Because you never go to London and see a bunch of French dudes walking around like, where's the prostitutes? They're walking around going, oh, where is the food?

There's no food here. But, you know, and what I'm saying is from experience. Because in all those countries they hate they hate english like guys who in their 20s like the soccer fan there's a type like that soccer hooligan prostitute seeking kind of drunk fucking english guy that goes to amsterdam they go like they treat amsterdam like we treat vegas or montreal right like they go there for their stag parties and they're like let's go red light district after we see a football game we're here for a football game and you know after that we go get some algerian pasta tits

and now that the eu's there they can all just travel freely. So you can travel freely, which is wild. Like, if you're a Greek dude, you know, who only speaks Greek, you could just go work in Romania for Andrew Tate, who I guess there's a job opening for holding down girls. You know, there's got to be a money collector. He's got to have some sort

of Paul Asarsis, right? Sal of Parsis? What was St. Paul's name around you? Sal, his original name? Paul? Who was the tax collector? Paul. Before he became like the messenger of Christianity to Rome. Saul of Tarsis

was his name. Better call Saul. Andrew Tate has to have somebody whose job it is to ask these girls for his cut of the money. And I bet it's some Liverpool guy. Excuse me, ladies. Premier Tate

wants this money. Did you dance in front of the camera? Well, hit me his brother. Hit me his brother. His brother and him. They about to get in their boogies, and they need their money for gas. Why do they talk so fucking stupid?

Jared, what's going on with Kanye? I don't know. I can't speak for Kanye, dog. Dog, American news is dominated by nuclear war and Kanye West. And then the internet news is the less mainstream for people under 40 is dominated by Andrew Tate. And I love them all. But what's going on with Kanye?

First of all, give Kanye credit. The kid knows how. He does what you call a blitzkrieg into the news he is like the nazi uh he's like the nazi air force what they used to call those the reichstag what the fuck were they called you remember their their their famous like air raids blitzkriegen he blitzkriegs dog he does like aerial invasions he's like the battle of crete of page six nobody knows how to get dude he just will parachute into all of our lives and we'll just look up we're like we're getting invaded by kanye news the same way my mother looked up and just saw the sky coated with parachuting nazis we just wake up

and go holy shit kanye's parachuted into every fucking media outlet i mean he is everywhere kanye is a newsmaker dog now it's safe to say that no matter what he says based on his actions which is the way anyone should judge anybody. Never judge anybody by what they say. Talk is cheap. Actions are what matter. By his actions, I think it's safe to assume that Kanye's someone who doesn't mind attention.

Can we say attention? It's not. It would be safe to say it's one of his top priorities, right? You don't marry the most famous woman in the world because she gets fucked and she's got a fat ass. You don't marry the gossip queen if you don't like attention, right? You know what I'm saying? You could pretend you don't like attention all you want. You don't want people talking about you. But as soon as you're in a relationship with Kim Kardashian, who is, she's like, she's like Helena Troy,

but she's like horror of Troy, right? She's like kind of the Helena Troy. Everyone's talking about her, right? She's hot, whatever. She's got a lot of plastic surgery. She's got a big old butt, right? You don't marry her if you don't like attention, correct? So it's safe to say Kanye doesn't mind the spotlight.

You know? When Taylor Swift was winning an award for whatever. What was she winning the award for? White Princess of America? I love watching. By the way, when I was in, we were in, we did shows at Soul Joel's. Yeah. Shout out Soul Joel's.

One of the guys that worked there, who's also like a young comic, went to school with Taylor Swift and her brother. And he showed us pictures of her in his yearbook that he happened to have in his car, which was weird. Which was weird that he had the yearbook in his car. Yeah. Does he just carry that around as like a conversation starter? Yeah. He waits for it to, he's like, I know people from out of town are coming up taylor swift might come up because she grew up in this area right outside redding pennsylvania and if it does i want to seem interesting he was like

i went to school with her let me show you i have the yearbook in my car i'm like why are you carrying around a yearbook from 30 years ago guy if that's your only claim to fame dog you shouldn't be doing anything else with your life you really shouldn't you. You should become a Taylor Swift tour guide. That's what you should do. And then he can use the yearbook like those 9-11 tour guides downtown do. They have the whole collage of the towers coming down and they just take tourists around.

You could become a Taylor Swift Reading tourist. That's a good business. I can't believe nobody's done that. But Taylor Swift ate a lollipop right here. And here's right here where she took she was in music class and here's right here where her drunk white trash father was good for nothing was trying to get a job i mean taylor swift was definitely not made by the government and that was a good part of why i met him because i always suspected she might have been made from the government i mean she's gorgeous's gorgeous. She's like a gorgeous woman. She's six foot or whatever,

and she writes her own songs. I'll give her that. That's straight up pump squires and pierogies. Yes. I mean, here's the deal about Taylor Swift. She can't sing all that good, and she can't dance all that good, but she writes her own songs,

and the songs are pretty good. I've liked a few of them. Come in, where you been? I can't show you. I mean, she is fumeless. God. I bet you smells like pancakes down there. She's so gorgeous.

You know what I'm saying? Humming. Humming. Humming. Whoa. Humming. Humming. Humming.

Humming. But it was good that we met that guy because at least we saw some proof of her having a childhood in pennsylvania unlike justin timberlake and ryan gooseling and christina aguilera which i'm still convinced were created by the cia uh in a petri dish i'm still i'm still convinced but she she's a good old fucking hillbilly from pennsylvania she's a germanic immigrant like third generation working class fucking could have been a mennonite daughter churning butter with acne and marrying her cousin but she got out her ticket was a fucking guitar and she got out where you been i can show you a couple of things i love watching her dance i love when

she's like because when you see like a girl like her like a white girl from pennsylvania like her moves you can see the choreography like when beyonce when beyonce performs beyonce fucking slays and when beyonce slays you can't see any of the choreography you know it's just so seamless fluid fluid but then when you watch taylor swift she's like one and a two and a three and a four and a five and a six and a seven and an eight yeah and a nine and a ten and a three and a four and a six and a seven sometimes it looks like she's just shoveling gravel yeah yeah you can like clearly see it you can clearly see the turns and like you can see the numbers being counted you know five and six and seven and eight

so when kanye grabbed her mic you know and what did he say he said this what did he say he grabbed the mic he said something about i'm gonna let you have your moment but beyonce had one of the best music videos of all time yeah i'm gonna let you have your moment but i'm gonna take your moment that's right that's what that's like when someone on the phone says i'm gonna let you go you know hey i'm gonna let you go you're like you're getting off the phone you're not letting me go you want to go that's exactly what that is i'm gonna let you have your moment but um let me steal it real quick. And then, yeah, there it is. He's a Blitzkrieg, dog.

Blitzkrieg Kanye. He comes in like the fucking German Luftwaffe. That's what it is. Took me a second. The Luftwaffe. That's what their Air Force was. He comes in. Next thing you know, you look up and you're like, fuck, it's raining Kanye today.

So Kanye is now a real Nazi. Kanye is a real one, dog. I don't know. I mean, do you think he went to the Jewish talking point, which is a new one for him? Is this new? I don't think so. Has he been talking about the Jews before? I don't think he's ever dived into that, no man yeah it could be new then right so is this strategic or does

kanye really believe in the uh the jewish the the trope of the uh all all consuming business let me just say something if there is if the jews are like a mafia that controls i guess now what so these conspiracy theories really have opened it up so it's hollywood i guess it's the music industry as well the banks we've already heard about um the weather the they control the business of the weather um if they do control it and they're like oh the media too the media um they control them too um now here's the deal jews are successful right they're in a successful ethnic group so they're in all these fields and they get into high positions right um so there's some of them there there's also a lot of jews that are not jews i'm in entertainment so i'll tell you i'll

tell you straight up there's a lot of everybody in there there's a lot of everybody in there it's not just jews um and they never the jews that you come across i'm just giving you an insider perspective they never like pushing they're not they're not like fucking pushing the nobody's pushing jew on you nobody's ever pushed you on any i've never seen a jew put something jews don't even want to push you on you if you're not a jew you'll be walking around they'll go excuse me are you jewish right they never ask you that because it's obvious you're not yes right but like i'll be walking on the street what is that palm what's their palm sunday rosh atana whenever they come around and

they try to hand you palms yeah i don't know what that is yeah i've had that happen to me too yeah so what they do and if you're in brooklyn look't know what that is. Yeah. I've had that happen to me too. Yeah, so what they do, and if you're in Brooklyn, look, I'm just talking to the rest of the country here. They don't have horns. I've checked. Okay? I've done the,

I've gone undercover for you. They don't have horns. Believe it or not, they're just people. They're just people like everybody else. And, you know, there's no, there's nothing going on. I hate to say, and I i've checked you know how many of my girlfriends were jews a lot of them didn't find any horns but you

didn't find any horns didn't find any horns didn't didn't find any secret emails about the weather and i checked i went into those phones and i was like is she talking is she is there some secret thing going on with whoever? None of them even work for the banks. A few of them weren't even that rich. I dated a lot of Jews, okay? I have relatives who are Jews because I have a cousin who married a Jew. Well, you know, he's half Jew.

Just the good half. But they come up to you and they go, on those days, whatever that holiday is, have you found it? No. Whatever the holiday is, they come up, they go, are you Jewish? Hello, are you Jewish? Right?

They go, are you Jewish? Hello, are you Jewish? And they walk up and you go, no. And then they just walk away. They go like, sorry, we don't want to talk to you. The funny thing about Jews is like, they're the only group that doesn't proselytize. They're not trying to recruit more Jews.

They have no agenda to push to other Jews. They're not trying to push Judaism on you, right? They're just trying to succeed and help each other. Guess what? That's what every ethnic group does. The Greeks do it too. I'm sure the Italians to a certain extent, especially when they were trying to make it, I'm sure they did it too. I bet you the Arabs do that. I bet you the Koreans do that. How do you think they got in all the grocery stores? You know, how do you think the Greeks took control of the diner? Now, if a diner was a more important

thing that made a lot more money, I bet you there'd be conspiracy theories about the greeks it's just nobody cares about cheeseburgers deluxe does that much the only people who would formulate those conspiracy theories are too drunk to think because they go into the diner at 24 hours two in the morning and nobody ever sits around and goes hey man how come all the fucking greeks got diners i'll tell you how because they helped each other out they helped each other out. They helped each other out. That happens. That's something that happens with immigrants, right? They come and they're like,

they send for their brother, they send for their cousin. Yeah, oh, you Greek? Come here. This is my brother. He's a Greek. So we start a business. I take him home later.

You know? He come and work for me. You make us happen. You stop us, come working for me. He make us, get rid of him. He's a Mexican. Get out of here. me. Get with him. He's Mexican. Get out of here. We don't need him.

We're making Greeks with the eggs here. Okay? My wife's behind the counter. It's all Greeks. The Greek is, my wife is behind the counter. The dog is here. I have my own everybody. Greeks are paranoid.

That's why you have to walk. You ever notice in a Greek diner You can't just hand the check To the waiter You have to walk it up To the cash register To like an 89 year old Greek man Who's still working

And hand the money Directly to him Because they're paranoid And then you can What you can take Is a fucking dirty mint That has COVID on it Everyone's hand

Just goes in there And it tastes like Crest toothpaste And a wet toothpick Disgusting And a toothpick For Uncle Mark's Yo NBA fans I am so excited when his hand just goes in there and it tastes like Crest toothpaste. And a wet toothpick. Disgusting, and a toothpick. Frank, what a mutt!

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I was talking about how everyone's kind of become humorless, like America and this quest to be famous and the sale, you know, that these grifters sell people, very entertaining grifters who I support. So, you know, they're trying to sell everyone on being rich and famous and all that, as if that's not something that happens because you already have something in you and you want to, or that's some sort of key to happiness that's being sold. When, listen, I know plenty of people who are rich and famous and none of those things lead to happiness. You know, I think the focus, I don't want to sound like a socialist, but I am,

I am trying to get on the young Turks podcast. What's the popular young Turk, the muscular one, the young one, they're Turkish too. Have a Greek on to show you that you're progressive. one the young one they're turkish too have a greek on to show you that you're progressive um the big tall one the fucking strong one anyway hassan nine hassan hassan piker oh yeah um but yeah i believe what makes people happy is you know the company they keep the hobbies they have the life they live their family um and some fucking security some security with health care and good education. You know, we've really lost our concentration on the middle. So that's where these grifters have come in and sold everyone this pie in the sky dream

of becoming a millionaire as a cure-all for everything. When even if you achieve it, it's not. So that's the way I look at that. That's the way I see that. You know, that's what I believe is going on right now. And we had that episode a couple of weeks ago. I was talking about how a humorless culture can lead to fascism in sort of a dark place. And then two weeks later, old Kanye pops up, taking us back to the 30s, baby. I mean, it's like watching a silent film.

I mean, he really took us back. I mean, he went straight in. And you know what's funny? It's like all the stuff that's going on, and then he's just like, the Jews, and you're going like, Chris Rock, that train's never late. So out of the left field, he just starts going against the Jews. Right? And what was his initial complaint? I't even i'm i've been so

blitzkrieg by kanye why is he back in the news again what was the first thing he did because then he he he built to the jews i believe he said he was going to go defcon 3 on the jews jews because they were they would be the only ones to because i believe it started with kim released a story that how her and p Pete had sex in front of their fireplace. Because her grandmother said that she used to do that. And that story got leaked. And Kanye was like, oh,

it's only the Jewish people that would say that for a white woman or a Christian mother with four black children. It would only be the Jews to lead her to say something like that. So he was like, oh, I'm going to go DEFCON 3 on the Jews, which doesn't even make sense. And Kim Kardashian's not Jewish. She's

Armenian. But he said the Jewish people encouraged her to say a story like that. A Christian woman with four black children and putting out a negative image of a black, basically a black children's mother out there in the world. Okay, well that part's true. He's talking about the media? Is that what he's saying?

I don't know, but listen, that part, I didn't know that part. That part's true, because let me tell you, as someone who has dated a lot of Jewish women and is from Brooklyn, New York, where I've been around a lot of Jews, in my house, there's a curtain. You pull it back, there's just a Jew there.

That part's true. And whenever I'm about to have sex with my wife, they go, Bubby, bubby not in the bed moving into the living room by the fireplace this is an old torah secret that's the way the jewish occult does it bubby bubby when you do that that that makes yahweh very happy, and Yahweh shines upon us, and therefore when Yahweh sends the Messiah back, then we will enslave, we will thereby enslave all the Gentiles all over the world, Bobby,

but you have to have sex by the fireplace. And it also has to be with he whose name won't be mentioned. That's very funny, that he's creating a devil's advocate scene um in the living room yeah man that kardashian pussy just makes people go crazy dog it pushes everyone over the top everyone sort of loses it a little bit monster energy drink a vagina but before yeah now but before that right jared harvin he was in he was in the news a little bit before that

this was an escalation because i remember he kind of blitzkrieg then again before that right what was the first blitzkrieg the first round of attacks it wasn't the jew was like a follow-up tweet but he had already pushed himself into the news right yeah he was doing a podcast called drink champs but that was after when he ran thinking about the jews what was the what was his first initial complaint that put him in i thought it was the jews now that was like one first round where he warmed us up he gave us a jab he was staying on the outside he was jabbing us a little bit. And then the late night Jew tweet was like a knockout punch.

He pulled out of Gap and Adidas. He pulled his artistry out of there, the collaboration. Oh, it was the White Lives Matter shirt. That's right. The first thing was the White Lives Matter shirt. Yeah, I'm sorry. I tend to erase things like that from my mind. It was the White Lives Matter shirt was the first. Those, I'm sorry. I tend to erase things like that from my mind. It was the

White Lives Matter shirt was the first. Those were the jabs. See, he's like a boxer. He was working the outside. He's working the outside. Jab, keep in the distance. Then he counterpunched with the big late night Jew tweet where he says, when I wake up, I'm going deaf ground three of the Jews. I wanted

to say, dog, I think you already did write that tweet. ground three of the Jews. I wanted to say, dog, I think you already did write that tweet. And then Michael Rappaport, of course, gets to make his video.

Fucking kooky Kanye. Let me fucking tell you. So it went from White Lives Matter to the Jews. Now, you're a young black man in America.

What is going on with Kanye? What's going on? Talk to me about Kanye. What do you think he's doing? Kanye is too much of a genius to be labeled as crazy. That's what's going on here. I do love his music.

His music is great, but his ideas are so good. I've never seen a crazy person produce so many viral, mind-bending, social media shutting down ideas in my life. The only crazy people that I truly know in my life shit in their own hand and paint it on their own wall. But he comes up with shoes, multimillion-dollar deals. He gets attention. This is not crazy Kanye. This is a coordinated Kanye. Because even when he

creates like those people tire shoes, which we've had a little bit of fun on here, they still get everyone talking. It doesn't make sense, but it still gets people talking. It's like when you see an Asian person using an umbrella during the daytime. It doesn't make sense, but you do talk about it when you walk by. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So you think there's a little method behind the madness? There's a little method. There's a little narcissism in there. There's a lack of attention. You saw that go hard after he broke up with Kim and he had the Pete thing and pulling up to SNL and threatening. He was always in the news, always there, always there.

That's why I think he had a little bit of admiration for Trump because Trump had that thing. Always in the news, always there no matter what he was saying. I think this is just like, I don't know, I think he was a little lonely. He was like, I'll pull out the Jew card. His life is about to crumble like matzo. There's no coming back from this.

It's tough coming back from this one. That aside, who knows what the future holds for him i mean you know i guess they could welcome him with wide arms in ukraine because that place is crawling with nazis and you know russia's just you know russia's just you know it's full of Antifa. Here's my vision. Let me predict. Nobody sees this coming, but what if this happens? Putin, who's on a quest to denazify Ukraine. Okay?

What if Kanye, or should I say the artist formerly known as Kanye, now known as Yee, which is short for Yeezus Christ. What is going on with your ego when you name yourself Yeezus Christ or Charlemagne the God? I just wanted to point those two out. Just call me Alexander the Great. That's going to be my new nickname is Yanni the Great. What if Jesus Christ knows what he's doing?

He's so genius and brilliant. Again, not to disagree with what you say, but I think this does speak to our bar of what genius is. I think they got a different our bar of what genius is. Okay. I think they got a different measure in other countries now.

You know, I think in China, maybe say, Hey, this guy that designed this building or this guy that cured this thing, he might be a genius. We're over here calling Yeezy a genius. We're over here calling Gary Vee a genius. Very entertaining.

And I support it. He's got a big brain though. His hair can even keep up. Yeah. But what if Jesus is a genius and Jesus Christ is doing this to distract Putin on his mission to denazify, right? And he goes, he's going like, I'm over here.

You know, it's like when someone sacrifices themselves for the group. You ever seen The Departed? Yeah. Right? When Martin Short's character goes, you got for the group. You ever seen The Departed? Yeah. Right? When Martin Short's character goes, any of you mugs got a light? And he's distracting, giving himself up, sacrificing himself so Leonardo DiCaprio can run away. And go, I can't fucking do this anymore.

And then do a hot scene where he flexes on purpose when he fucks that girl in the apartment. And girls go, I love, Leo's hot, but I only like him in The Departed, which is a crazy thing women say, as if they wouldn't fucking drop their panties for Leo D. Anyway, I digress. What if he's sacrificing himself, as Jesus Christ does, for us,

and going to the bad man, I'm over here, you Nazis over here, Putin. Come denazify me. That's the subtext of this whole thing. Putin redirects his energy from his pure moral denazifying conquest mission in Ukraine, which is the reason why he's there. And he focuses all that denazifying energy on Kanye and frees the Ukraine and saves us from nuclear holocaust.

And that's the story, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, of the Bible according to Jesus Christ. He's not the hero you want. He's the hero you need. He's the hero you need. He's like Batman. And I owe it. And I owe it. Something wrong. Great's like Batman. And I always

something wrong. Great song. Putting up with myself way too long. Gifted when I the most. I want Taylor Swift and Kanye to get together.

What type of way? I want Taylor Swift and Kanye to get together. What type of way? Um, I want them to fuck by the fireplace and make the Antichrist. As it says in the Torah. According to the Torah. The Torah says,

Baruch Adonai, and then unto the day where Taylor Swift and Kanye, now known as Jesus Christ, they went into a fireplace in Redding, Pennsylvania, and they copulated and made the Antichrist,

for which the Jews rose up and crushed all the Gentiles back into the Stone Age. Long live Israel. Yeah, and then the leader of the YouTube Andrew Schultz rolls up and he came with Mr. Beast and they started a gay relationship by a fireplace.

And Netflix was crushed into the Stone Age as it says in the Torah. And Tootsie Gabbard switched political parties and walked into the sunshine and went elk hunting with Joe Rogan. And they made the perfect republican who claims to be democratic to not get too extreme and it was said that the jews crushed the gentiles into the stone age or i should say tulsi gabbard and joe rogan walked hand in hand during an elk hunting excursion in the wildlands of Texas where they were shooting wild pigs from a helicopter. And so it was said in the Torah that the liberal sanctuary cities were flooded

with undocumented immigrants and they were crushed by the flood of God's wrath and the Republican abortion-hating pro-life Republicans rose up and crushed the Gentiles of the coastal elites were crushed after they had sex by the fireplace in Joe

Rogan's mansion on the lake I'm telling you Doug maybe this is all biblical maybe this is all biblical. Maybe this is the great reset of Yahweh. We're in some kooky times. And I emphasize IE in that word. Because if you just say, if you try to shorten it, it's a slur. I don't remember who it's against.

Kook? Oh, no. You've got to take the O out and put an I. Is Kook not a slur? Oh, Kook is close. You take the O out, you put an I, you have a slur. You take the K out and you put a G, you also have a slur. Kook is one letter away. It's a real tightrope walk of a word but it's safe kook is like when

you're playing uh you know that kid is a game what is it i'm on base running bases or kick the can you're like i'm on base dog i said kook i didn't say yeah i didn't say good it's the triple a of slurs yeah close so who knows so we're just what happens with kanye maybe he saves the world here there's no album on the horizon i don't think so he's buying parlor now so he's buying parlor that's what he's doing he's buying parlor all these social media companies are being bought up by these uh right-wing champions. Elon Musk's deal with Twitter is going through, right? He's buying it.

I think that it's very, I think that this speaks to the greatness of America in some way and also the greatness of the comedy that is reality, that the simulators probably enjoy that Kanye West will end up owning the social media site that will probably have the N word said the most on it. The irony of that's pretty cool. Yeah. Isn't that funny? Yeah. You know, that's, that's, that shows some sort of greatness that the platform that will probably end up having the most racial slurs in earnest, earnest racial slurs, will be owned by a minority. I think that's great.

Yeah. I think that says something. Fox News was started by a black man. Was it? Yeah. Roger Ailes was black? We can look that up. Yeah.

I read that somewhere. Was it? It might have been. I read that somewhere. Was it? It might have been. I think it was. Okay. We'll find out at the end of the episode when Jesse finishes Googling it. Guys, Bond Charge is a holistic wellness brand

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First of all, it brought the word dossier back into the American lexicon. It's a cool word. I thought that was a real colorful dossier. First of all, it brought the word dossier back into the American lexicon. It's a cool word. I thought that was a French agent. Yeah. Well, you know, it could just be a report. You could have called it a report,

an intelligence report, but report doesn't have that same cachet. You know, what's in a name? Shakespeare said, there's a lot. There's a lot. Certain names grab you.

You know, I'm no Edward Bernays, but certain things grab you, you know, no edward bernays but certain things grab you you know we're the news that not news come cheat on your beliefs with the delicious maniac we're trying we're not succeeding at it but we're trying i saw some podcast descriptions that like really knocked it out of the park and because we're trying to get better at marketing or at least i am i took a screenshot of it okay because i bet you this podcast is dog shit but they're they've they look like they're

very popular and look at their description explore this person and this person explore conspiracies conundrums and the dark corners of the deep web turn Turn on, tune in, drop out. I'm curious. I want to get in. We need to figure something like that out. Like a good, you know... What would Kanye West do? Should we just say we get into what the Jews are up to? I mean, people will listen.

It's a choice. It's a hard choice. But, you know, we'll get a fan base in this saturated climate and landscape of content we will definitely definitely rise above the noise with that marketing byline we get in tune in yannis pappas jared harvard and jesse couturo delve deep in what the Jews are up to

and it's definitely fireplace related yeah our doubles will definitely rise yeah it would rise right it would rise

but unfortunately some of our fan bases right hands will rise too is it the right hand that goes up I think so now do you think he did this so you're thinking part

of this was this part of his plan to kind of it's very hard to get attention now right it's a very if kanye's just here's the deal if you love attention if your thing is tension if you've monetized attention you've made yourself a star like that it's very hard to just get attention not being crazy now because because of the sheer amount of content out there there's just so much noise you know the news is now content everyone's making content everyone is on steroids in the sense that they're all kind of editorializing to get attention it's like this it's that's the media steroids lying and using hyperbole and being divisive. That's the steroids for journalists in the media. That's how they get attention. That's

how they get their numbers up. It's a home run race now between all these companies. We're all watching. It's brought the media back. People love it. The gap advertises on their fucking tweets, on their blogs, on their sites. It gets the numbers up, right? So in this climate where everyone is in some way kind of doing what Kanye's doing right now, is kind of doing what he's doing. Is he raising the stakes, going to DEFCON 3 Jews because in some calculated way, like you've explained, to get attention because is that kind of the only way to get that level of attention,

which is the bottom floor standard for Kanye? Because when Kanye gets attention, he don't want that regular attention. Kanye don't want that, I'm dropping an album attention going, oh yeah, by the way, Kanye's dropping. He don't want that i'm dropping an album attention going oh yeah by the way kanye's dropping he don't want that he wants everyone making content about him everyone talking about him he wants that right yeah so do you think this was just in some way a narcissistic calculated

ploy to just get people to talk about him yeah yeah kanye's crazy has kevin hart's work ethic that's a very good quote it It's like, what's next? Yeah. How could I do this bigger? Yes. I did the Eagle Stadium. I did the O2. I cheated on my wife.

Now we just got to take it to calling out the Jews. Right. I've already called myself, nicknamed myself Jesus Christ. Yes. And people are over that. Yeah. And that got a lot of attention. Although I do think Kanye's going through some real things.

Like, I think there's real concerns over his children, you know, and his personal life and that getting intertwined. He's just like the prototypical. This is what we like. Well, you know, there's an old expression that goes, hey, dog, you made your bed. Now you got to sleep in it. Yes. I mean, that's the problem when you surround yourself with yes men or you're a fucking idiot. You know, your ego tells you you can do nothing wrong.

It's like, dude, if you get into a relationship with Kim Kardashian, what are the chances that the two of you are sitting after a 40-year relationship in rocking chairs drinking sweet tea? What are the chances of that? I'll tell you what the chances are. Zero percent. It's a donut baby it's a donut in a cop's fucking patrol car sitting on the side of a fucking highway pretending to see if people are speeding is a zero percent chance so fucking sleep in your bed dickhead you married fucking kim kardashian and had probably surrogate kids with them.

There's no way she carried those babies. Yeah. I mean, what the fuck, man? Everyone wants their fucking cake and eat it too. There's consequences. You want your relationship to be steady and sturdy, and you want your kids to have a normal life. Then go marry a good girl.

Yeah. Go marry a good girl. Guess what? Maybe a little boring. Maybe a girl who doesn't have a reality show whose father isn't also her mother. Yes. Maybe that's a start. And maybe she yells at you for going up the steps from your basement when you get a Brooklyn cannery.

Yeah. Maybe, maybe when you go home to, when you introduce your family to her family, you don't go, that's her dad. who's also now her mom. And that's also her mom. And that one, we're not sure, but that one probably is OJ Simpson's. And between the three of these, three of these aunts and my kids,

there's only one real ass to go around. Maybe that's a good start. Because Kendall, I think, is the only one who still has got a real ass. Yes. Maybe that's a good start. Because Kendall I think is the only one who still has got a real ass. Yes. Maybe that's a start. Maybe that's a start. You don't marry a girl who

started her career getting purposefully fucked on camera which there's speculation that her mom said this would be a good move. Hollywood is a sick place, dog. Don't get it twisted. It's a sick place. I mean, narcissism is what fuels it.

Ego and narcissism is what is the impetus for your success in that town. Good word. Yeah, and those are sins. Those are sins, Kanye. You have sinned. So, I mean, now you're surprised when the check comes? And listen, the check always comes. The check always comes.

Yeah, yeah. But anyway, so any of those, whatever real problems he's going through, I'm sure his $500 million will help him out. You know? He does seem to be drinking a little bit, though, because he has that puffy, reddish drinker's complexion. He's all puffy. He was hammered on that podcast, right?

Who did he do? Nori's podcast? Yeah, Drink Champs. The rapper Nori? Whoa. No, that was Black Rob. What was Nori's big hit? Early 2000s

Was it Capone and Noriega? Yeah Yeah Yeah drink champs Dog rappers love naming themselves After the most horrendous people Even Machine Gun Kelly You do know that was a criminal right?

Capone Noriega Noriega. Songs about him. Sly Green. Noriega. When is the rapper Jeffrey Dahmer going to put out his first LP? I can't believe there's not a rapper named Adolf Hitler yet. Yo, what's up?

This is Stalin and Adolf. We're coming at you right now with our mixtape. You don't remember Adolf? Was there an Adolf? Yeah, it was Adolf. It was eight off. It was eight off. Oh, eight off. Yeah. They love the worst people.

I mean, Al Capone was just a bad dude. Machine Gun Kelly was also not a great guy. They were criminals. They were murderers. There was an old rapper named Necrophiliac. Necrophiliac. That's someone who fucks dead bodies.

That's close yeah yeah dog i miss those like very pure rap names like ice tea would you like a nice ice tea or ice cube everyone likes a cold drink yeah Everyone likes a little ice cube in their scotch. Nice names but long criminal records. Yeah. Or how about Eminem? Who likes a nice Eminem? Nice name. How about Big Daddy Kane? Everyone likes a cane. Thinks of candy canes. Big L. Hey!

It's Big L! Cool G Rap! Good name. Nice and smooth. Everyone likes when something goes Cool G Rap. Good name. Nice and smooth. Ha ha. Everyone likes when something goes down nice and smooth. Fat Joe, body positive. Yeah, body positive Fat Joe.

Big L. These were all good names. Third base. Ooh, that means you fingered the girl. And then it changed. Then it got into like, even Snoop Dogg. Oh, everyone loved Snoopy. It was Snoop. Then we got into like, even Snoop Dogg. Oh, everyone loves Snoopy. It was Snoop.

Then we got into Capone, Noriega, Necrophiliac, 8 Off, Machine Gun Kelly. You know? Everyone went extreme. Maybe this is the tattoos on your face of social media content. Maybe we're in that phase too, right? Everyone's tattooing up their face for attention.

And sometimes people tweet Defcon 3 on the Jews. This is basically a proverbial tattoo on Kanye's face, right? It's like getting attention. Yeah, because I agree with Jared. I just can't think he's laying there tweeting that not thinking it's going to be massive news when he wakes up. Like he's not that unaware, you know? But he does seem like he has megalomania.

He seems like he has like bipolar, the people who have megalomania are like borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, psychopaths, sociopaths, asocial types. He's definitely a megalomaniac. He runs around calling himself a... Look, like I was joking.

He's musically, he's great. His music is great. But he's not like, you know, you know, there's a lot of guys who are great, you know. He's great. His music is great. But he's not like, you know. There's a lot of guys who are great. He's not like, he's Kanye. It's like some songs are great, some songs I'm not so into. You know what I mean?

But in his own mind, I think he's, you know, he's the Shakespeare of this shit. He's the Steve Jobs of it. How, Sway? What am I supposed to do, Sway? I'm already a genius. I'm the Machiavelli. I am the Michelangelo. I am the Steve Jobs.

I am the Shakespeare, Sway. He's a humble guy. So the Steele dossier, back to the Steele dossier. The Steele dossier, that was a fun dossier, not a report. It was a dossier in which I think that was where they said

that the Russians had influence over Trump and he was their puppet because some prostitutes had peed on him in a hotel. influence over Trump and he was their puppet because some prostitutes had peed on him in a hotel. Which could, which obviously now I think it's been proven is based on false information, right?

Now this guy got off, right? The FBI has concluded that like 80% of the dossier is bullshit. And the primary source for that dossier, what was his name again? He got off today or this week, right?

When you're hearing this, it was this week. Igor Dengchenko, which sounds like, is that Ukrainian? Lumenchenko, right? The boxer? There's a boxer with that name who's Ukrainian. Not that name, but that type of name. He's Russian.

He's Russian. And he was acquitted. Four counts of lying to the FBI. And an embarrassing defeat for Special Counsel John Durham. Yeah, I mean, Durham has taken two cases to trial and both have ended in acquittals. After more than three years looking for misconduct in the FBI's Trump-Russia probes, Durham has only secured one conviction,

the guilty pleas of a low-level FBI lawyer who got just probation. The jury returned not guilty verdicts on all charges against Danchenko, a Russian expat and think tank analyst who provided the bulk of the material for the anti-Trump dossier, which there was rumors that Hillary Clinton, right, kind of had her hand in this somehow. Yeah. Her campaign. Yeah, that's right. She funded it through some other organization to do opposition research or something like that yeah i mean look you don't

have to be a conspiracy theorist to see that one side easily gets off while the other side has their feet held to the fire i mean how how is this guy acquitted and then i love how this article is putting it on john durham and this seems like something bigger they're just going like hey man he was trying to get Trump. Just put him away. Yeah, it's just letting, you know, it's like, why was he not prosecuted? That Steele dossier was like, became the ground zero, the nucleus for all of these theories on how Trump was colluding with Russia, right? Wasn't it really the nucleus of it?

Yeah, of course. Russiagate, remember that? Yeah. It was on all the news. And it's now being told to us that that is all bullshit, that he didn't pee on any hookers, which I'll be honest, if I was a betting man and it was on a betting app, if FanDuel's put it up, I'd still put him a little money

that he has peed on a hooker at some point. So I don't know about that. But at least he didn't do it in Russia and there was no cameras who caught him and they were holding that over his head. Which, you know, that's the thing is Trump would care. Yeah, I peed on it. Remember when he got caught with the grabby pussy?

Yeah. He's like like i've grabbed a few who hasn't he would it wouldn't have ruined him to pee on the hooker thing you know because people now are starting to act very humorless in that those trends you're starting to see where people um it's like cult of personality they start to follow follow the person. And that, I think, is very dangerous because I think the whole point of America is that the rule of law and the system are more important than the leader.

We've seen where that leadership goes when you follow a particular person. That's why we have term limits, which I personally agree with. I think all these things, the system we created here is because we've, we looked at the history of humanity and we've seen where everything leads,

you know, and we're going, oh, that's bad for this reason. Here's the example that again and again and again and again, and we created this system of checks and balances with a tricameral power structure, a legislative, judicial, and executive branch

that share power but act as a buffer on each one being a runaway power, and then term limits, which acts as a buffer against autocracy, separation of church and state, which acts as a buffer against theocracy. We've seen where that goes. We've seen where all these. We've seen where all

these things lead and they're not good. And now you have people who will like die for Trump as a leader, um, who totally excused January 6th. Well, it was a party that got out of hand. It's like, nah, that was a little bit more than the party. I mean, it wasn't the Holocaust, but it was a little bit more than a little raucous party. You know? They fucking jumped into the Capitol building. You know? Some of them were probably just there, like, enthusiastically, but there was a few of them that had some zip ties

in their pocket. There was a few of them that wanted to do some damage. And now you have this. And then you got these people who deify AOC just the same these people who deify AOC, just the same as people who deify Gary Vee, and I wasn't shitting on Gary Vee as a human. I got nothing personal, like I said.

It's just I'm shitting on the deification. That's what I'm really shitting on. I'm not shitting on Andrew Tate. Andrew Tate is very entertaining. I bet you if I sat down with Andrew Tate, first of all, I would do it for the numbers. Secondly, I bet you he's a really nice guy. I bet you that's not even him. I know it's bullshit. I know he's fucking entertaining. You know, the concern is you got 12 year olds who watch it, right? And then they go into school and go, you're my property,

bitch. I get that too. But for me as an adult, I'm going, I love Andrew Tate. I love the Paul brothers. The Paul brothers, they're fucking good, actually. They don't say shit compared to fucking Andrew Tate. But the point is, it's the deification of these people. It's very un-American. There's something. Even the people that deified Fauci or the ones that made him the devil. I mean, he was just a fucking guy

who was maybe doing some corrupt shit, maybe not. Probably just was behind it. Like, didn't understand it and made some mistakes like everybody else. But we fucking, this thing has happened in this country where people are either Hitler or not. We've gotten to this thing now. She's calling Biden Hitler. Is he Hitler? Are people going in ovens? Is he trying to expand the borders of America?

Can we stop calling people Hitler? There's only one Hitler and it's Amy Schumer. No, Tulsi, he's not Hitler. Okay? She even wears these like fucking arena preacher white suits with the little fucking Elvira streak in her hair

and she's hot as fuck I would watch her do yoga that was my point I think I could have made that point better two episodes ago but that was really my point. And that speaks to the loss of the sense of humor, is that, you know, because these people are deified, when you make jokes about them,

people react with ire, you know, and that's not a good sign. I don't think that's a good sign. I don't think that's a good sign at all. You know, at the end of the day, rule of law, the separation of church and state, you know, term limits, they're really our only hope, dog,

for freedom and justice. They really are. There's no other way. Yeah, do we have flaws? Yeah, is there corruption? Yeah, yeah. But you have to, is there corruption? Yeah, yeah. But you have to keep striving to uphold the rule of law. The rule of law are people have these rights

and nobody's above the law and we're all serving the law and the law is based on reason and common law and that common law is based on reason and you amend and you amend and you amend based on reason, logic and reason. Very important. I hope we don't lose sight of that

and I feel it slipping out of our hands. You feel it slipping. Democracy is a very tenuous thing. It didn't last long in previous examples but here it's become, you know, it's feeling very tenuous, precarious, you know? And I don't know, maybe it's inevitable. But that's my personal opinion.

I will give that away. I'll give that away. I will give that away. I'll take a moment and stop being a satirist and a goofball and just say, as the son of someone who was a very difficult person, but that's what I was taught. That's what I was taught growing up,

was that there's something very important about upholding rule of law. You know, that's the standard. And when that starts to slip, and that's what my mom used to tell me, international law was so hard to enforce, it was because of culture. I remember she always told me that,

and I was like, yeah, it's a tough thing. But you know, if we don't come up with some universal standard that applies to everybody, we're fucked. We're fucked. Because that's it. That's the only thing that keeps this shit together.

You know? And everyone should have their turn at power and then they give it up willingly. Willingly. You know? And, uh, so, and, you know, it's rough, you know? It's rough that you see people, like,

vehemently defending someone who wants to hold on to it that's rough you know when there's no evidence you know on any large scale you're going like that's a bad sign that's a bad sign and then you have shit like this where this guy gets off from creating this fucking dossier that dominated the news and you're like that's a bad sign too this is starting to feel this this is starting to feel like power has more rule than law who's in power cult of personality is starting to have more influence than law how did this fucking guy get off? Politics aside, how? I don't understand. I don't fucking understand. Whether you're a fan of Trump or not, it's besides the point.

And it should be besides the point, but unfortunately, it's not. Unfortunately, I'm sure the people that hate Trump don't care about this when they should, when they should. Even though they hate Trump, they should care about this because this speaks to fucking rule of law. God damn it, I got to get back to the funny. People don't like reality. They like what I was fucking talking about, the goddamn fireplace. Durham said in a statement, while we are disappointing the outcome,

we respect the jury decision and thank them for their service. Oh, go fuck yourself. I also want to recognize and thank the investigators and prosecution team for their dedicated efforts in seeking truth and justice in the case. Go fuck yourself, dude.

You're paid off. You're fucking paid off. This is transparent. Describe the efforts to corroborate the Steele dossier, which ultimately came up empty. Really, did they? Jurors were shown portions of Steele's memos, which he had previously said

weren't ever meant to become public. Yeah. Sure. The dossier's primary allegation that there was a well-developed conspiracy of cooperation between Donald Trump and the Russians repeatedly came out throughout the proceeding. Durham also used the case to put the FBI on trial,

and that would be a preview of upcoming final report. He zeroed in on the shortcomings and errors of the early Trump-Russia probe, especially the Bureau's over-reliance on the dossier to propel forward some key parts of their burgeoning inquiry. They scrutinized him as a counterintelligence threat, but later paid him as an informant. This is so dirty.

They paid Denchenko as an informant. Durham pressed Denchenko's FBI handler about the possibility that he was a Russian spy. To the contrary, the witness said Denchenko was a treasured FBI informant and suggested that Durham was hurt,

has hurt U.S. national security by indicting it. I don't know what the fuck's going on, but it's dirty. This is dirty ball, baby, and it's not cool. How the fuck this guy gets off, I have no idea. Just by the simple fact he says

I didn't mean this to be public, what the fuck's up with that? And what did the Hillary campaign have to do with this shit? Because I remember that they had something to do with it. Do you remember? You're an avid Fox News watcher.

What is Tucker saying about it? It's dirty. There's dirtiness all over the place. Do you remember something like that? Yeah. Whenever shit's this confusing, you know something stinks. Something stinks. Yeah.

Something stinks. And, you know, on both sides. And here's the thing, man. It's very sad. You know, it's like, you know on both sides and here's the thing man here's it's very sad you know it's like you know people's politics is mostly their culture i've noticed that it's like you know when you're hanging out with your family and if your family's all one way you don't want to be the one guy who's are you know it's like usually nobody thinks for themselves and shits you talk to any of those people about this talk to any people who hate Trump about specific policies that were good, they're not even listening

because they hate Trump, right? Nobody gets into that shit. You speak to people who hate Biden and call him Hitler and you talk about some of the good things he's done, right? And they call him Hitler, right? They're both Hitlers to everybody.

Nobody's a human being and nobody thinks for themselves and everyone just roots for these fucking politicians like it's their baseball team. I mean, might as well have a fucking MAGA hat on instead of a Pittsburgh Steelers hat.

It's the same shit. You're rooting for them. But it's not baseball. These are human beings trying to do a job. They do some things good, some things bad sometimes. But you're not even educated

on the particular issues and you won't allow yourself to see the particular issues because God forbid as a liberal, you say Donald Trump had a good policy at the border, which now it seems like Biden is employing. God forbid you say Donald Trump maybe had some good points about how we need to be energy independent or maybe how he said Germany how we need to be energy independent. Or maybe how he said Germany better learn how to become energy independent from Russia. That's a bad. God forbid he say that.

Because remember, he was Putin's bitch. And that was all you could understand. Because you were listening to fucking left-wing talking points through the media. That's true. What I'm saying is true You know And then on the flip side God forbid there's any merit To Biden wanting to beef up the IRS

In order to track down some of these Offshore fucking shell accounts God forbid there's some merit to that Right God forbid that would be some merit to that That would actually help your fucking community God forbid No you're just going to say to me,

Yanni, you know why he's doing that? He's going to come after you. He's going to come after small content creators, you know, and audit them. Guess what? I don't fuck around with my taxes because my dad also told me, don't ever fucking fuck around on your taxes

and take care of your teeth. My dad ended up spending like 300 grand on his teeth because he went to, in Korea, he wasn't brushing them and he smoked like a fucking chimney and he lived till 91. So don't believe the liberals. Smoking's good for you. God, you know, I go into these and I say,

Yanni, stay away from the long day. Stay away from the long day. Stay away from the long day. But you know, it's like asking a I say, Yanni, stay away from the long day. Stay away from the long day. Stay away from the long day. But you know, it's like asking a fox not to fucking sniff out a mouse. I can't change my nature. It's got to get in there at one point.

But I think this episode's good that we put it in the back and not the beginning. Because I think two episodes, we put it at the beginning and I think we lost a lot of people. And that's why the numbers are that. But we went all comedy

and then we gave a little long day and then we'll end with a little fucking frosting we'll give you a little frosting on top we'll end with something James Corden the greatest comedian of our era he's like the Jackie

Gleason you go back and you watch the Honeymooners you go back and you like the Jackie Gleason. You go back and you watch the Honeymooners. You go back and you watch the Jackie Gleason show. You go back and you read the autobiography of Jackie Gleason. How he used to go to rooms in Jersey. And just fucking make it shake with laughter. And I say that's like James Corden and his show. What's the difference between fucking carpool karaoke and honey motors, to me, it's tomato,

tomato, as far as quality comedic entertainment, thank God we brought him to our country, because we didn't have enough fucking less than mediocre fat guys who could sit in a car and sing Lady Gaga's song while she's in it, but they're both not singing, and sing Lady Gaga's song while she's in it, but they're both not singing. Thank God we had to outsource for that. We couldn't give that show to fucking Lil Rel. We couldn't give it to... John Gabers?

John Gabers? We couldn't give it to Talent, the father. Not saying, I don't, gee, the kid's young. We couldn't give it to Leonard Oots? That's a funny fat kid. One time he featured for me

in Providence and he buried me so I went up and bombed as a headliner. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. He's a fat kid with big eyes and he's funny as fuck.

I love that kid. But I didn't like that he fucking buried me in fucking Providence. And then he tweeted, the owner said, next time you're headlining. I didn't like that. Oh, jeez. We couldn't give the show to fucking Leonard

Utz. You know? We had to go to England and get James Corden. That makes me a conspiracy theorist. That makes me think there's some sort of Illuminati or something where they're eating, you know, adrenochrome or something. Like, what is the explanation?

I don't understand. I do not understand. What does James Corden do that he got that job over the amount of American comedians? This is America, dog. You don't go to England and there's like two shows that have American comedians. The Daily Show and another late night show. And John Oliver, it's like, why?

We don't have American comedians? Wow, I'm sounding like a real fucking immigration right winger on comedians. Keep these fucking undocumented clowns out of my fucking country. So supposedly James Corden is a fucking dick, according to the owner or general manager of Balthazar, which was a really hot restaurant when Liv Tyler was 19. It's a long time ago, dog.

Shit in New York has a fucking very short shelf life of being a trendy spot yeah i remember when odeon was the spot remember like you in the 80s odeon you'd be like all the artists are hanging out odeon it was like the cool fucking spot people were doing coke you know now odeon is just like a diner you go in there you did the waiter just comes up goes hello i'm just from bangladesh yesterday i didn't want to do the voice because I didn't want Hari Kondabalu to sue me. It would have been bad. You know? Odeon's no longer.

Balthazar was hot, hot, hot. I'm talking about late 90s, mid 90s, late 90s, early 2000s, Balthazar was the spot. Now nobody gives a shit. Restaurants in New York are like women in Hollywood. Quick turnover. Very good comparison. They really are.

You have like a little window to be hot and then, you know, Lyskina, I remember that was a hot spot. Ooh, it was like a fucking taco spot, but then you open a little secret door and you go downstairs and you're in a club and you're fucking in a club,

you know what I mean? And there's Richie Kiva and you're like, what's up, Richie? I'm back, back, back. Where's P. Diddy? Oh shit, Jay-Z. Bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk.

Models, models, models's up, Reggie? I'm back, back, back. Where's P. Diddy? Oh, shit, Jay-Z. Bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk, bunk. Models, models, models, models. You know? And now Balthazar is arguing with fat James Corden who apologized, profused, I'm very sorry. I'm so sorry. So supposedly he was a dick to the staff, right? Mm-hmm. I read something that there was a hair in his salad or something,

and he got upset. Reportedly, there was a hair in his salad, and then this is not the first time he was mean to the staff. There was another time he ordered French fries, and the salad came instead. So he got mad at that. He got mad at that. You do not, if a fat he ordered French fries and salad came instead. So we got mad at that. You got mad at that. You do not.

If a fat guy orders French fries and you send a salad, I side with the fat guy. Yeah. You don't want to go healthy. You want to go. You want to go less healthy if you mess up the order. So if he orders unhealthy food, you got to go. If the food order is wrong, you got to go more unhealthy. Yes.

Because that would have been happy if you send him a double cheeseburger. All right. I'll let it slide this time yeah i don't want to inconvenience the workers i guess destiny wanted me to have another double cheeseburger yeah big surprise he's a dick i often find that the people who appear to be the least dicky are uh like in public are usually the most dicky in private it's a balance yeah it's very rare that you'll find someone who will openly admit that their course and then privately you're like yeah he wasn't lying you know it's very rare you know very rare you find honest people like that a lot of these people try to hide i'm such a good person it's part of their persona and the reason they like that. A lot of these people try to hide, oh, I'm such a good person.

It's part of their persona. And the reason they do that in a lot of ways is I think sometimes is because they rely on that nice guy thing as part of what they're selling. You know? The most talented people who have like natural raw talent don't have to do that.

Everyone knew John Belushi was a fucking mess. Everyone knew Chris Farley was a fucking mess. You know? You know what I mean? It's like, it doesn't surprise me. It doesn't surprise me that he's a monster. You know, every time I saw him on his show, it'd be just like super nice.

I knew, oh God, he's a monster. You know? It's like, it like just I love Jimmy Fallon too but you know just how much he laughs it's like he's got to sit there like Jay Leno and do the are you driving thing you know he just slams at Jameson when he's done and takes his dick out and bats it against a fucking wall. You know he just did. For every action, there's an equal but opposite. You can only take so much obsequiousness before you lose it. You can only pretend for so long before you just got to lose it. You can't tell me that there's some NBC pages over there at Rockefeller center that don't have some stories to tell about Jimmy Fallon's Coke drink binges after

the last show on Friday night. Be like, yeah, look, sometimes he just, you know, and I bet you it's after like a few, like really,

really like Nickelodeon type guests where he just loses it. You know, he's like sitting there and he's interviewing like the, one of the actresses from euphoria and he's just sitting there and he's going, you're driving, you're driving. He's doing the Jay Leno thing.

All right. That's real good. Yeah. Oh my God. So what's it like? You got a girlfriend? Yeah. Tell me. It's all good? Yeah. Oh my God, so what's it like? You got a girlfriend? Yeah. Tell me you had to do it. It's all these prepaid,

they're all preplanned bits that he's got to hear. They come in, we can do this story. He probably looks at them and goes, Jesus Christ. I remember when I used to fucking be around Chris Farley and Adam Sandler. Now I got to sit through fucking this bitch from Euphoria,

talk about how her parents pushed her into acting or what she thinks is a funny story about one time she ordered uh chocolate covered strawberries and they didn't come and she had something snarky to say i gotta sit through that and he goes oh god oh god when these fucking when these people these tourists when these tourists walk out of this studio, I'm going into my fucking little lair, and I'm whipping out my goddamn Jameson. I'm putting one bottle in my asshole and one in my mouth.

And I'm taking turns between standing upright and doing a handstand to get this booze in my body, baby. And then we're calling up my secret contact. I'm getting some blow. I'm calling up Julio. He's biking down and I'm getting on the phone with a madam and we're having a whore party at NBC studios. And then I'll be fine. Monday morning.

I'll come in. Are you driving? Are you driving? What's up, everybody? I want to give a little shout-out to our small business sponsors over at patreon.com slash yannilongdays. Hello to Wendy Ordonez. Que pasa, muchacha?

All right, what has she got for us? Oh, this is very cool. This is very cool. The holidays are almost here. And if you want to get a special gift for someone special. Now, these are really cool. If you do this for somebody, it really puts in, shows, it shows like care. It shows like you put some thought into it.

It's not like you get the run of the minute. Here's some socks. Hit up Wendy Ordonez. What does she do? She hand paints oil canvases portraits um she's a miami-based uh artist and you can check out her work at wendy uh x amena studio what is that wendy x i m e n a-E-N-A studio.com. Wendy Exima Studio. Wendy, you're putting it up right here, right? There you go.

Right there. Go to this website. Wendy Zimena. Zimena. That's what it is. How do you pronounce Exima? How do you pronounce that? Exima.

Well, I'm having trouble with that word. What do you see? I say I. Wendy Eximena. Wendy Eximena. Zimena. Zimena. Zemena. Wendy Zemena.com. Here it is right here. Oh, it's spelled out Zemena. So wendyzemena.com. There, we solved it. If I just would have read on, I would have got it. And find everything you need to know about the process of her work. It's very cool. I checked it out. This is a great gift. She's going to make one for us. So make this

holiday truly special and go commission your portrait here from her. Support her and also get somebody a really cool gift or some really nice art for your crib. You won't be able to find something like this in retail store, guys. This is what I love.

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Chris Minetti. You can only find out about Minidetti Financial Services from this podcast. Or word of mouth on the streets of South Jersey and Philly. That's the only way. Or a pending IRS investigation. Or that. That's it. I think his case was up next after the Steele dossiers.

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