You Are Being Unreasonable - 016 - In which we read 'Harry Potter and the Zodiac Killer'

Episode Date: May 3, 2018

"Nom nom, pizza pizza." This week, we wade once more into the hellscape of Mumsnet. We discover a house set on fire in a celebratory fashion, drive-by pizza accidents, six year-olds drinking Pornstar Martinis, and Paul Hollywood's sex-gut.

Hello, driving on drugs feels better when they're prescription. All I know, the world looks beautiful, the world looks so damn beautiful. I feel fantastic, and I never felt as good as how I do right now, except for maybe when I think about I felt that day, when I felt the way that I do right now, right now. I feel fantastic, and I never felt as good as how I do right now, except for maybe when I think about I felt that day when I felt the way, Hello.

Welcome to Eurobeing Unreasonable, a podcast about Nuns Met. Nuns Met, the typo I made when I was looking for Mum's Net, because subconsciously I don't want to go on Mum's Net anymore. No, you want to go on Nuns Met, a site where Nuns Meet the Chat. Go to meet, yeah. However, here we are at Mum's Net. Yeah, we need our listeners to start sending in Mum's Net threads for us because Hells can't take it anymore.

We're very grateful to the listener who tried, but said it was a hellscape, and they couldn't. This is a hell that hells lives in, every day. Not every day. Every week. It's okay, though. We've found some people that didn't make me angry, and we're here to chat about them.

But yeah, do send us threads if you happen to find any DM us at YOB Unreasonable on Twitter.com. Yes, please. Shall we begin with the speed round? Am I being unreasonable? Hooters? Yes. Am I being unreasonable? all invited for a sleepover, but one?

Oh, no. Am I being unreasonable to ask how often you change your sheets? Yes, I have strong opinions. Am I being unreasonable, inheritance, equal, or by need? Ooh, no, good question. Am I being unreasonable to think it's cheekiest fuck to expect other people to fund your skin removal surgery? Yeah, yeah.

They're being unreasonable to think that, or it is. unreasonable to expect other people to fund your skin removal. They're being unreasonable to think that. Yeah, I don't know why they don't just opt out. It's called socialise medicine. It sets all apart from the US. I'd love it if we clicked on it and it's not a crowd funder or something. It's just someone objecting to the NHS.

Oh, that's how I interpreted it. Oh, I thought it's probably a crowd funder, but we'll never know because it's the speed round. We don't go into it. We're not going to find out. Am I being unreasonable? Is having my tea a northern thing? No. Is it? What? This is all new to me. I'm a northern man. Hells is a southern lady.

A southern lady makes me sound like I'm from the deep south of America. I do declare. They love tea. Mr Simon, you were giving me the vapours. I talk about having tea, but I have lived with a northern man for many years, so who knows? Let's do a full-length thread. Am I being unreasonable to say no to the sixth Harry Potter book? D.D. is five. She's just finished the first five Harry Potter books, and, obviously, now wants to move on to the sixth.

However, from what I and other D.C.'s remember, this one has more mature themes, romance, detailed deaths. And it's generally more complex. Am I being unreasonable to ask her to wait a year or so before reading it, or should I let her try and see how she does? got to look out for the detailed deaths and romance the sixth book is Harry Potter and the Zodiac Killer is that right I believe so

yeah no six is the half blood prince as we all know where some nonsense happens and then a character is revealed to be the half blood prince you have to dance around it

it's Snape well there we go so now this five year olds has no reason to read the book because you ruined it Shat all over a five-year-old's love of reading. Well, five is too young.

Yes. So, can we just pick apart the thread, as we always do? D.D. is five. She's just finished the first five Harry Potter books. How has this five-year-old read five Harry Potter books? I think this is just a big stealth boast. Look at my five-year-old. She's so advanced. She's read five Harry Potter books. Yeah, I think purely physically.

there's a barrier here because those books get quite thick after number three and her tiny little hands and her tiny little wrists physically won't be able to lift these massive books that this precocious Matilda is sticking on her library card. Oh, that's a shame, isn't it? Also let's talk about the fact that the five-year-old got through the first five Harry Potter books, including number four where Cedric Diggery is brutally murdered. was different because it was less detailed. Is it five or four where Harry kisses

Cedric's ex-girlfriend? I think it's five. Harry's a piece of work. What I want to know is when this girl started reading these books when she was, I don't know, presumably three. Did nobody stop and think, goodness me, are these age-appropriate? Yeah, it's not like when we were growing up, like we know they get freaking dark at the end.

Yeah. We all know this now. I don't know why she's only now decided that these books are age inappropriate. So, yeah, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince on IMDB, the film, is a 12A. So that suggests that you should be 12, but you might be able to handle it as a little five-year-old, as long as your parents with you. Okay. I'm going to read some of the things that the BBFC says are in this film. Okay.

And you have to tell me, here's the game, you have to tell me if these things are ranked as moderate or mild. Okay, I'm looking forward to this game. Go on. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince contains sex is sometimes alluded to. Mild. That is mild, very good. Glimps of prostitutes. Moderate? That's mild.

What is a glimpse of a prostitute? Patricide and the murder of family members. Moderate. That's moderate. Okay, good. A character tortures Harry and a house is lit on fire in a celebratory fashion. Moderate? That is moderate.

That seems a bit weak for torture. Thematics pertaining to date rape. Moderate? That's mild. That's fucking appalling. Adolescent sexuality is a persistent topic. Mild? That is mild.

Okay. Themes of genocide, fascism, political and personal corruption, ideological fanaticism. spirituality, immortality. That's just the world we live in. I assume that's mild. This sentence goes on. But what do you think that is? I'm going to go with mild because I'm a realist.

That's moderate. Oh, but date rape is mild? Mm-hmm. I see. Okay. Very good. Sexually derogatory slurs such as slut. Mild?

Moderate. So you can date rape someone. That's just mild. But to say slut is... Oh, this is garbage. Man, this family's dark. The kid shouldn't read this book. Should we see what the thread has to say about the book?

I'm in awe that she can read these books at the age of five. Does she read them all by herself? At five? Wow. Doubtful. This is Avery Edison's precocious child. It is. This is what I was saying about how I think this whole thing is just a stealth boast about having a very talented, avid reader kid, whatever.

Five, I would have thought that's too young for any of the Harry Potter books. There is more to a book than reading the words. But, having said that, I admit one of my youngest's first words was Harry Potter. Bullshit. Harry Potter doesn't have a space in it. Harry Potter. This post came from somebody with a Harry Potter username, which I won't read out, but they're clearly a loser. Can we go back to there's more to reading a book than reading the words?

I assume they mean understanding the themes, comprehending. All the allusions to fascism, genocide and date rape. Precisely. To be honest, though, whether the kid gets it or they don't. If they get it, the damage is done. Your five-year-old now knows about fascism, date, rape, and genocide. Or, they don't get it, whatever.

They get to feel like a big grown-up with their gigantic book of terrible writing by a terrible woman. I read a book by Jacqueline Wilson when I was a kid. I read a lot of books by Jacqueline Wilson. We all did. Yeah, there was one in particular that contained a word that I knew was bad and I reported it to my grandma. You reported it? Yeah, I said, I read this word and I knew it was bad. It was in this book. What did your grandma do with the report which you filed?

Nothing. Why would she do it? I think she just sort of patted me on the head. Yes, that is a bad word. That's really adorable. Everyone in that story comes off really adorably. One last thing from the thread. There are hundreds of more suitable books for her to read. There we go. The Lord of the Rings.

Good wholesome books. Any of the Game of Thrones books. Exactly. They're fine. They're great for five-year-olds. Yeah. Okay. Am I being unreasonable? Mother-in-law opened my birthday present.

It's my birthday, and I had a small get-together with family. An aunt gave a present to mother-in-law to give me as she couldn't make it. Mother-in-law opened both the present and the card before she came. I know, because she told me. Anyway, you could tell they've been opened and resealed. WTF? I didn't say anything tonight because I didn't want to cause a scene. Now I wish I had said something.

Is it too late? I feel like this is pretty cut and dry that the mother-in-law is being unreasonable unless it turns out the original poster for some reason. I don't know. Can't be trusted to open her own gifts. Yeah, let's not jump to conclusions. Maybe. She thought the present was a threat and wanted to neutralise that threat.

Yeah, perhaps. Like she heard it ticking and thought it was a bomb, but it turned out to be an alarm clock. Or it was leaking white powder, and she thought it was cocaine, but it turned out to be flower, a flower baby. Happy birthday is a flower baby. Yeah, if that's what's happened, I think the aunt has been very unreasonable

by giving a grown-up a flower baby. But probably not, probably. The mother-in-law is just being noiser. I don't understand why she didn't say anything. She didn't need to cause a scene. People on mum's that always say I didn't say anything so she didn't want to cause a scene. It's perfectly possible to say things without causing a scene. People do it all the time. It's just conversation. You can say something and not cause a scene. For example, she said, oh, I opened your card and present before I arrived.

That was what the mother-in-law said. So why didn't she say, why? Why? Yeah. That wouldn't have been a scene. No, that wouldn't be causing a scene. But I too live in constant fear of causing a scene, which is why I won't confront anyone, about anything, or talk to anyone.

But responding to somebody saying something is not confrontation. If she hadn't acknowledged that she'd opened and resealed the things, I could see why you might not want to say, did you open and reseal this? Yeah. That could come across as confrontational, but if someone tells you, why don't you just say, sorry what?

Sorry what? Why did you do that? Are you quite all right? That's mine, bitch. So you've dialed, your problem is, you've dialed it up to confrontational quite quickly. Yeah, yeah, I feel like this is pretty cut and dried, but I just really liked it because it's just so mumsnet, isn't it? It's so mumsnet. Oh, someone did a thing that didn't make any sense and I had a perfectly legitimate reason to ask about it, but I did it. And now I'm stewing about it

and I'm on the internet and I've made it a massive thing that it doesn't need to be. Oh, mumsnet. Yeah, it's too much. Maybe there was a reason. It doesn't sound like they was. If I wouldn't need to open someone's present, I would do it and then just say they didn't wrap it. Oh. It's a super soaker. I see. I wouldn't open someone's card.

That seems... No. That's a step too far. Somehow opening the present is a bit of a dick move. Opening the card seems like an invasion of privacy. Yeah, why if there was money in that are a very personal note? Yeah, what if there was a night from the aunt saying, I've always liked you better than everybody else?

particularly your mother-in-law, don't trust her. Sorry about that UTI that you had. Yeah. That's very personal. I want your mother-in-law to know that. I don't know why your aunt would know that and write a card about it, but yeah. Maybe she's your guy now. I don't think that she should be blurring the lines like that.

That's fair enough. Yeah, this ant has behaved very unprofessional. I think the aunt is being very unreasonable. Unprofessional. Unprofessional. I would visit a forum called Am I Being Unprofessional in which people just talked about stuff that was blatantly unprofessional that they'd done

In talking about it, it is being unprofessional Just for the social work, it's like, oh, went around this house and it was a shit show Accidentally cut off a guy's leg Teachers, like, I couldn't be bothered to do any marking so I just guessed I would visit the Am I Being Unprofessional boards featuring this woman's gyno aunt

who wrote a card about a UTI. Let's just hear from the thread on this one then we'll move on. I just had to share it because this sort of crap is why I'm so fed up with this board. Maybe the card or the present at an absolute stretch, but both. Oh yeah, of course.

Yeah, either or all would have been fun. Absolutely. My nine-year-old did this just the other week. It wasn't wrapped, but he tore open the packaging on a toy he knew perfectly well as a present. for someone else. He was then mortified and very upset by what he'd done. I think he just did it on autopilot.

He simply wasn't thinking. Is there any way this could be something similar? We all make mistakes. No, because this is a child. The difference is that that's a nine-year-old who then felt remorseful, as opposed to an adult, who then didn't seem remorseful. Oh. Just terrible.

Someone said, I'll get your DH to ask her about it. I guess, or do it yourself. When you said she told me, how did she tell you? Like, in a it's so funny way or an embarrassed way or what? I don't see how you'd slip that into conversation. Yeah, let's roll play this. I open your present. Oh, cut to two hours later and frantically on mum's net

wondering what I should have done about that. Yeah, or, here, I opened your present. Oh, cut to two hours later on mum's net. I just don't understand why I shouldn't say why. Yeah, that would have been the easiest way to deal with the situation. If why felt confrontational, maybe just how comes? That seems even less confrontational. Yeah, what were you thinking?

That seems more confrontational. Let's move on, because now we're just getting to a scale of what is and it's not confrontational. Am I being unreasonable? Did I overreact? I usually cook from scratch every day, which takes time and effort, and my DH likes and eat the meals I cook. This weekend I just wanted a break from it. So I went and got an oven pizza and told him that I was doing it tonight but I'm going to add toppings onto it and he said fine. He obviously was not listening. So I did it. It took time to chop the

veg, cook and season the chicken to add to the top of it. He came home and said have you cooked anything? I said yes I cooked pizza like we agreed and he says is that it? And I said, yes, it's enough to feed both of us. He came downstairs and I was waiting for him at the table. Then he said, I'm not having that. I don't fancy it. I don't like it. I don't know what happened.

I just got really upset and threw it in the bin and said if you told me earlier when I bought it, I could have done something else. I went off to be on my own and now he's finding something to cook, horrible of me seeing as he's been at work. I feel like I acted immaturely by doing that and I don't know why I felt upset by it because I always make an effort to cook

and ensure food is ready for him but for some reason I decided to just buy a pizza and he all of a sudden doesn't fancy it I ought to just go and help him cook but I don't know why I feel upset and irritated that he couldn't accept that I haven't cooked for one poxy day yeah it sounds like you don't value your labour yeah there's a lot about this that makes me really sad and there are some bits where I'm just like oh the hell is wrong with you Yeah.

Like, why did she decide that she wanted to night off cooking? But then she chopped a load of veg and added that, and then cooked and seasoned a chicken. Just make chicken and veg. You've done it by that point. Exactly. Or just buy a pizza that's got chicken and veg on it. Nothing wrong with a pizza anyway. No, I'm not a big fan of pizza, but, you know, if someone had said, oh, I'm going to do pizza tonight, what do you think?

And I'd said, yeah, sure. I wouldn't then make a scene about it. Yeah, the time to lodge an objection. has passed. Exactly. Yeah, this sounds like a terrible man. He does, doesn't he? I like the phrasing of my DH likes and eats the meals I cook.

This is a nice meal from the bit. Another good meal. I suppose, maybe she means as opposed to eats but dislikes rather than likes but doesn't eat. Yeah, it's just a funny way of putting it. I just don't understand. I'm just so confused about why she. she wanted a break from it, so she got an oven pizza, and then she chopped veg, and she cooked and seasoned chicken.

Yeah, it sounds like she... It sounds like she spent a whole day slaving over this oven pizza. She had to go out and buy it, she had to buy all the accoutrement. Yeah, she's putting too much pressure on herself to provide a meal for her ungrateful husband. Yeah, absolutely. You do most of the cooking in our house. I do.

Because I find cooking very stressful. You do? And I'm always very grateful. I try to be when you put labour into cooking because I recognise that it's labour and it takes time and effort on your part Do you like and eat the meals I cook? I like and eat the meals that you cook. Good.

See, and I don't like pizza and if I didn't want to cook and you said I could cook as pizza I would probably be upset with myself for being ungrateful and say it's okay I'll do something else. I wouldn't make a scene and blame you for the fact that I don't like pizza. I don't know how this man has turned it around that it's somehow Maybe he had a traumatic experience involving pizza during the day Maybe, yeah, in the morning he was all about it Yeah, cool, pizza, then

There was a drive-by pizza incident When someone threw a pizza at his face while he was at work Yeah, or I imagined a pizza falling on him like a piano Like an anvil of pizza Yeah, oh no Oh He's probably really bitter that she hasn't even asked how he's day was She's just started talking about pizza

Not knowing how traumatised he is I don't see how she acted immaturely She put food that no one wanted to eat in the bin, and then she walked away to get some space from the situation. Yeah, it sounds like she was justifiably upset by her husband's dismissal of her pizza. Yeah. And vegetables and seasoned chicken.

And, yeah, had an emotional reaction to it. It's fine. I don't know why she didn't eat the pizza, to be fair. Well, yeah. I suppose that's a shame. It sounds like they're perpetuating some patriarchal bullshit. Should we hear from the thread? Some traditional gender rules,

which I'm aware we also, perpetuate, but and I feel very guilty about that. No, it's just that I enjoy cooking and you don't. Yeah. I actively like cooking. You actively dislike cooking. It's just that it's gendered labour.

Oh, it's traditionally viewed as gendered labour. Yeah, but whatever. Life's too short to get hit up about that if it's not a problem. Yeah. In this instance, it sounds like it is a problem. Yeah, we negotiate that within our relationship. Thanks for listening to us talk about how our relationship works

week and week out. Let's hear from the thread. No, I think you underreacted and have been for a long time. Does he ever cook? You know that you're not his chef, you are his partner? Yeah. Then the next person, the very next person, and this again is why I've had enough of this forum. You can't make him eat the pizza though. Doesn't sound like he was nasty about it and just said he didn't fancy it. It's not something I'd cook my DH after being at work. Was there any side salad or anything? Oh, this is virtue signaling nonsense.

If you don't fancy a pizza, you're not going to be like, oh shit, there was a side salad. Sorry, that changes everything. Oh, I'm delighted now. Well, no, but it is heaped with fresh chicken and vegetables. But the side salad is a complete red herring. It's irrelevant, yeah. And, oh, it's not something I cook my D.H. after being at work. She said that it's a one-off, and even if it was what she did every day, he could learn to cook.

It wouldn't kill him. Oh, and someone else, why did you not just get a pizza with toppings on it? Exactly. Exactly. Yeah, they got a child margarita. Layed it down with a full chicken. One of those Mickey Mouse-shaped ones. You seem to make him work for yourself. Surely the joy of pizza is it's ready-made, i.

take it out of the packaging and lob it in the oven. Job done. Yeah, man, if you're getting into seasoning chicken, just make chicken. Just make chicken and veggies. Yeah, exactly. That's a meal. You're not being unreasonable. It's a shame about the pizza, but only because you didn't get to eat it, not him. Yeah, in this situation, I would have stormed off to the bedroom, but I would have taken the pizza.

I'd be gnoming that down. Yeah. Nom, nom, pizza, pizza. Precisely, Helen. I imagine that's what people who like pizza do. We often say nom, non-nom pizza pizza. You and the other pizza lovers? Yeah, when we get together.

Yeah. It's just more of the same. everyone thinks the guy's an ass except for the side salad woman but now everyone's come on to say the side salad woman is also an ass so you can all agree there is justice in the world or at least a side salad does not make a pizza any more or less appealing if you have already decided whether you do or don't want a pizza

a side salad's not going to change your mind it is by definition a thing on the side who cares so did the woman overreact no no she underreacted did the man act like an ass yes because all men do Am I being unreasonable? To think, Pornstar Martini?

Ugh. Goodness. I don't consider myself to be prudish in general, so I just received an email from Miller and Carter Steakhouse, saying, another bank holiday on its way. And with the lighter nights and warmer weather, it's a great chance to indulge a little with our perfectly crafted cocktails, exquisite food,

and create more special memories with friends and family. So toast the holiday with our signature Pornstar Martyr, Martini? Am I being unreasonable? I think that's just a bit unnecessary. It's like someone trying to be all big and clever. Yes, I'd love to treat my family to a porn star martini. It's my daughter's favourite restaurant. We can all experience the glamour of being a porn star to get her as a family. Happy Bank Holiday. Yes, I know it's not for children. I just think it's a bit... They've chosen that as the signature of their restaurant. This is so pearl clutching, prudish, verudish, vermin. virtue signaling, bad, sex work exclusionary, feminist crap is probably going to come up from this. It's everything I hate about the website and everything I love. Why does she care so much? She saw an email. Yeah, calm down. Makes no difference to her life. You don't have to go to Melon Carter Steakhouse. Not at all.

It's her daughter's favorite restaurant. I want to know how old the daughter is because if the daughter's a child, which is what she seems to be implying, then it's bit weird that her kid's favorite restaurant is a steakhouse. Is this kid like six? Mommy, I want steak. There's another one called The Pink Lady, looking at their website. I think she would have found that far more appropriate being a lady. Don't miss a beat. Porn Star Martini is a real cocktail that they sell in lots of places.

Yeah, it's absolute vanilla vodka, shaken with passion fruit and mango puree, served with a shot of Prosecco on the side. Yes. Sounds nice. The thing I think is most objectional about a porn star martini is that Prosecco should never be a shot. But, you know, I think that, so I tend not to order them, and that's fine, and I've never had to go on the internet and say, ugh. What element of this martini makes it for, or made by, porn stars? Where's the porn connection? Is it the shot of Prosecco?

I don't know. Is that what sex workers do on the set? I don't know. I think cocktails just have funny names, don't they? Like, a slippery nipple. Yeah, that's the one I was trying to think of. Yeah. Yeah. And the passionate club man. Sex on the beach. I'd feel more uncomfortable going up to a member of bar style

and asking for sex on the beach where you can make a... Yeah, exactly. You can make an innuend out of that. Like, ooh, mm-hmm. Then a porn-style martini, which is very clearly just the name of a thing, isn't it? Hells they do a chocolate orange old-fashioned. Ooh. Hmm.

Maybe we should go to Miller and Carter. It would be full of six-year-olds drinking porn-style martinis while their pet-up mothers have a heart attack. I'm just going to have a look at the kids menu. She keeps using the word unnecessary as well, which is really weird, because nothing is ever necessary about a steakhouse. Barbecue chicken lollipops. Ugh.

See that, I could see how you'd be angry enough to start the threat. This is the younger guests menu. Is that what it's called? It is. Young guest menu. Young guest menu. Again, that seems unnecessary. There's lots of things that are unnecessary.

Yeah, but who cares? It's just the name. Just order it by its component parts if you want it. But it doesn't sound like you are going to order it. I think she's really read far too much into the fact that they're like, look, come to our restaurant with your friends or family, buy a cocktail, wear a business, the profit margins on cocktails are great, we'd like you to come, bring more people so we make more money. And she's read into this and she's like, now they're telling my daughter she has to be a porn star. Drinking the martini doesn't magically turn you into a porn star We can all experience the glamour of being a porn star together as a family Yeah, the pawn star martini comes to a fluffer Just to get you ready

What would be clever is if this woman is actually marketing Miller and Carter Oh, that would be good Maybe this is Carter and she's come here To get people all riled up? to get people all riled up and ready to go in and try the pawn star martini and then to kick up a fuss.

I see. Because they're awful mum's nose. Shall we hear from the thread? I know what you mean, but it's such a popular drink, especially with the Instagram crowd. They know it will sell well, big mark up and easy enough to make.

Oh, these people! The Instagram crowd, oh, family. If you hate people so much, just stay indoors and unsubscribe from mailing lists. The Instagram crowd all move has won and speak in unison. Take photos together, like the Nightvale City Council. A Greek chorus of people drinking porn-star martinis.

We are the Instagram crowd. Hashtagged blast. You're being unreasonable, bigger issues to be bothered about. Will you be extending your campaign to sex on the beach because it's encouraging indecent exposure? It's a horrible drink, but I tend to be a bit snobbish and stick to the classic canon. There's no canon of cocktails. There's no great cocktails that you have to read.

I'd be tempted to write to them to say, it's tragic that you're promoting this. If you're somewhere that's encouraging families to come and visit, unless they are somewhere that expressly have no kids' policy or is obviously aimed at the office crowd. No, because we've found the younger guest menu. But that doesn't say kids. Just younger guests. I get the impression that they will begrudgingly let you bring your offspring in,

but they really prefer if you didn't because it's a place for steak and martinis. Yeah, what are you going to give them? The tomato and meatball pasta. That sounds crap. And there's a vegetarian option available, which is presumably tomato pasta. Hmm. I don't think you're a younger guest anymore, sweetheart. You'd be horrified in places like Zanty.

I can't imagine this woman is... Yeah. I'm going to read you one final thing from this thread, which I think perfectly sums up everything about the thread. Wow. This, I couldn't agree more. Tesco do a party can version, and it's called Passion Fruit Martini. Much better. And I'm not a prude. I will happily talk at length about bowel movements and delight in a decent swear. I just despise and loathe the way porn is now just an everyday word in our vocabulary, like Facebook, Hoover, or Labradoodle. That insightful comment came from the user with the name Paul Hollywood Sex Gut

Thank you for your insights Paul Hollywood Sex Gut You sicken me I'm just sick of the way that Paul Hollywood is objectified as a You know an everyday thing as part of our vocabulary We're always talking about Paul Hollywood sex gut The same way we do with you know Twitter Microwways and cockapoos. Cockapoos. Disgusting.

They probably wouldn't care for cockapoos either. Must we be talking about cocks? Put it away, Paul Hollywood. By which I mean your gut. Let's do one last speed round. Let's get on. Am I being unreasonable to ask you about centre parks? No.

Am I being unreasonable, urgent passport advice needed? Ah, no. Am I being unreasonable Google Play Store? Yes. Am I being unreasonable, Ribina Wars? Rabina was? No, I want to know more. Am I being unreasonable to think my friend enjoys rubbing things in my face? If literally, then no, if not, yes.

Am I being unreasonable, royal wedding, kids party, clash? Oh, that sounds like it would have been glorious. You're lucky I didn't find that one before we started recording. Yes. Am I being unreasonable to expect my husband to tell me everything? Everything. Everything. No.

Really? Everything? I'll tell you everything when we're married. Never stop talking. You'd have to have your constant, your inner monologue would have to be an actual monologue all the time. You'd have to follow me to work. There's no time for people to tell you everything.

There is, because we know one person who did it, and it was that bigoted woman. What did you say? Everything. Look up Gillian Duffet. She's great. I miss Gillian. Duffy. On that note, we're going to end. Thanks for listening. Do send us any Mumsnet

Am I Being Unreasonable threads from the Am I Being Unreasonable board that you'd like us to discuss and we'll discuss them. And I'll be very, very grateful for the break from delving through the boards. Yeah, so DM us on Twitter or just at us on Twitter at Y-O-Bean Reasonable. Thanks for listening. Bye! And I never felt as good as how I do right now, except for maybe when I think of how I felt that day when I felt the way that I do right now, right now, right now.