You Are Being Unreasonable - 040 - In which we freeze the hamster and nationalise Mumsnet

Episode Date: March 7, 2019

"Who would you rather go to dinner with? Three unbearable women who are performatively ignoring chips and eating salad or Jerry Seinfeld?" This week, we generate yet more income from this highly lucrative podcast by pitching a shot-for-shot remake of Sex And The City but with Mumsnet, advertising LaserLads: Just Two Guys With A Laser, and starting our campaign to nationalise Mumsnet. Among the questions discussed this week, when do you lawyer-up when a friend has lied to you for money, is it unreasonable to cryogenically freeze a hamster like Walt Disney, and have you seen Jerry Seinfeld's new observational comedy special exclusive to Mumsnet?

Hello, driving on drugs feels better when they're prescription. All I know, the world looks beautiful, the world looks so damn beautiful. I feel fantastic, and I never felt as good as how I do right now, except for maybe when I think about I felt that day, when I felt the way that I do right now, right now. I feel fantastic, and I never felt as good as how I do right now, except for maybe when I think about I felt a day. Hello.

Hello. Welcome to You Are Being Unreasonable, a podcast about People being unreasonable on mumsnet.com. Do you ever worry hells that Mumsnet will go away, that it will get shut down for horrible transphobia and a lucrative source of income for this podcast, which has earned us £10 will go away? More to the point, I worry that by making this podcast by directing traffic to Mumsnet and keeping it in business,

despite the fact that politically I think it's a shit show. That's the thing that I am concerned about, but, you know. It is making us that sweet. sweet, sweet dollar. It's actually made us almost 35 pounds to date. Yeah, we're going to need to reinvest that back into future live shows, though, so. That's why I'm quitting my job. Wow, that's ambitious. Let this podcast serve as a letter of notice. Goodness me. I'm going to give this podcast to my manager tomorrow on a USB stick. What if your manager just pretends to have listened? You're like, do you listen to the podcast? You're like, I really liked, uh, oh,

Okay. Like all our friends and family. Yeah. Yeah, like one of my friends had obviously never listened to it at all until the live show. And then when we were doing the live show, it was like, so what are you going to talk about? And I was like, it's just the podcast, isn't it? It's just Mumsnet.

You could see that they really looked relieved that they'd never invested time in listening prior to that. So you just read out the Wikipedia article for Mumsnet every week. Oh, that's a special that we need to get in the pipeline. Is it? Should we do a speed round? Please. Am I Being Unreasonable? Boy forced to have haircut against his will. Goodness me. It sounds a little unreasonable, yeah.

Am I Being Unreasonable? Office brew-making drama. Am I being unreasonable? Really want to hear about that. Yeah. Am I being unreasonable to tell him he is crap? Nope, he's crap. All men are crap. Probably very unreasonable, re-unfit friend and skiing holidays. Yeah. Am I being unreasonable? Sorry, was I being unreasonable to freeze Dede's hamster?

I came downstairs on Dede's birthday to find that Wonder Woman the hamster was dead. Stupid fucking hamster. I didn't want to upset D.D. on her birthday, so I didn't tell her before I dropped her at school. I double-checked when I got home, just in case she'd been sleeping. But this one was cold, dead, stiff hamster, with red eyes, and it was all grey,

so it was definitely dead. I didn't want to ruin her birthday, but I didn't want it slowly decomposing in the warm living room either, so I popped it in a freezer bag and hid it under the frozen veg out of the way. I got her out the next day,

defrosted her in the cage and discovered her death in the morning, two days post-birthday. I was telling my friend, but she said this was ridiculous overprotective parenting. So, what's I am reasonable to freeze the hamster?

And has anyone else done stuff like this to save upset. That's I can't be the only one. Surely. So just before we go on, big shout out to Jen, who sent this to me on a Saturday morning saying, oh no, I've started reading Mumsnet. Yay. This was a brilliant thread to get into Mumsnet on. Thanks, Jen. Was I unreasonable to freeze the hamster? The question before the court, was I unreasonable to freeze the hamster? This stupid fucking hamster. It was dead. Stupid fucking... fucking hamster. Yeah. This is written after the fact and they're still quite angry at the hamster. This stupid hamster. Do you think she killed the hamster? It sounds like she was

pretty mad at the hamster. Yeah. How did the kid not realise that the hamster wasn't in the cage? If the kid managed to not realise the hamster wasn't in the cage, then, I don't know, how much did the kid even care? I like that the friend had said that this is ridiculous over-protective parenting. I would get as far as agreeing that it's ridiculous. I don't know. if my argument would be it was ridiculous because it's over-protective parenting, or if it's ridiculous because it seemed to come so naturally to her that she'd pop it in a bag and then hide it under the veg. Would the veg not crush it?

Maybe some peas, wouldn't. I guess if you flash-freeze it, then it becomes very cold and very solid. I've learnt this from pioneer woman, flash-freeze stuff before you put it in the freezer properly. Yeah. And then it'll be fine. It'll stand up to the weight of peas. Yeah, Reed Remand was saying just this morning, how to flash-free's your hand. for efficiency.

Yeah. She lives on a ranch in the middle of Nova and she freezes a lot of hamsters. Yeah. But I suppose you've got a point. What if she put it back

and then she was like, oh no, your hamster said and then the kid turns up like little PI kid like this hamster's been frozen by some peas. It's got a green bean in its mouth. What's going on?

It died of hypothermia and being crushed. These little red eyes have gone grey. Yeah. Its little red eyes have turned into little green eyes. These are peas.

Oh my God. I can't think of anything more sinister than a little dead hamster with two peas over its eyes. Like when you watch Game of Thrones and they've got the stones on the eyes, but with two peas on a hamster. They should do that little Viking burial for this hamster. Peas on the eyes and set it out to sea on a little boat, set it on fire. A song of ice and fire for life of this hamster.

That would be ridiculous overprotective parenting. Yes. If you allowed your child to have a full Viking burial, for their deceased pets. I would say that's ridiculous. Say it afloat on the bath. It does remind me of a time when, years ago now, a friend of mine was cat sitting over the Christmas period

and the people she was cat sitting for, people that she knows very well, she's known for a long time and they have warned her that the cat was very sick. But obviously, when the cat died while they were away, she didn't feel like she should do anything with the cat without them getting a chance to say goodbye. So she just popped it in the freezer and then she came and met us at the pub.

so we all got a text like running a bit late the cat's dead she's in the freezer mine's a vodka and tonic you're like oh okay happy Christmas feels like cockney rhyming slang cat's dead is in the freezer what would that be cockney rhyming slang for I'm going to bed you're a geiser oh I was thinking I'll have a vicari breezer also good do they still exist

the period of time when this story happened I think they existed yeah maybe everyone up and down the land has got freezers full of old pets. Maybe. Just don't know. You've got to prepare for Brexit somehow. Oh, no, no, no. Should we hear from the thread?

Yes. That is utterly barmy. That said, I wouldn't have wanted to spoil her birthday either. It's a birthday, so it's the perfect time to buy a new hamster. I'm sorry Wonder Woman died, but here's Batman. Oh, no. No, that's very callous. If one of the cats died, I would hope that you wouldn't buy me a new cat the same day

and think that that would have the same effect as not having lost the cat in the first place. Yeah, I guess. Even if it was your birthday. Oh my God, if one of the cats died on my birthday, I definitely don't want you turning up with a new cat, because that's Christmas time, and likely would be going somewhere, so the poor cat wouldn't even get in time with us. No.

It's say to you the upset of your DD knowing about the hamster's demise on her birthday, the hamster's demise. The hamster's demise. The hamster's demise sounds like the name of some sort of, like, really shit devised play it sounds like something that you'd see at like a level drama

or maybe a not very good sketch group the hamster's demise the hamster must have been old and sick or maybe just sick but anyway they should have froze it beforehand

like Walt Disney and then followed him out in the future when technology could save him get an ice spot and take it to the vet. The hamster's very sick. We flew with it. Are you able to save it yet?

If not, we'll come back in a month. That is no one technology has advanced. I'm picturing it being a bit of a passenger's situation and the hamster will accidentally become defrosted at the wrong moment and then fall in love with another hamster. Defrost that one? Yeah. That's not fair on the other hamster.

It's not. Someone here with like Alan Sugar level thinking they're funny when they're not, funny jokes. Why did you do all that? Surely you could have waited a couple of days to tell her without freezing and defrosting a hamster corpse. Forget Wonder Woman, the poor sod should have been called quick defrost dinner from the way you treated it. Having they capitalised quick defrost dinner? Because it's a brand name. Is that a brand name? No, because that's the name the hamster should have had from the way that she treated. It's just a terrible joke. Yeah. It is quite appropriate because didn't Wonder Woman get frozen to be in our time? Because it was somebody's

birthday and they didn't want to upset the poor lamb no i thought wonder woman got frozen back in amazonian times and then maybe i'm thinking of captain america hmm i just don't know are i being unreasonable to think that my friend has lied to me for money a month ago my friend decided it would be a good idea for us two to go on an overseas trip in april for old time's sake we were very close during our uni years. I agreed and sent £500 to her bank account to cover for my share of the lodging. Payment was all supposed to be done online. Fast forward to today the trip is cancelled because she doesn't feel like going anymore. Okay no problem. Ask her to transfer me the money and she can't because she's only got cash at the moment and wondered if she could wait till Friday.

Am I being unreasonable to be suspicious about this? If she was planning to book everything as per agreement, why would she even withdraw the money in the first place? I don't want to sound like the paranoid, untrusting friend, so haven't said anything to her beyond, oh, okay, thanks. Hmm, it's a long conno, right? It's a weird one. Go to uni, befriend someone, become close to them, drift apart, ask for a holiday, take the money, go to Mexico. It does feel like a weird one. I can't imagine that this has been the intention all along. Do you know what I think is more likely? I think it's more likely that this person really did think we should go on a little trip. Then they realised that they couldn't afford the trip, which is why they've cancelled,

and they're not in a great position, so they've used some of the money they've got here until payday. I reckon that it probably does all come down to money, and they were like, yeah, this is great. And they're like, oh shit, I haven't got 500 quid spare. She's gone on a trip with someone that I don't see very much anymore. Oh no. Oh, and I've used some of her money on, I don't know, the gas bill. Yeah, never see her again. She's going to drift into the night I think something dodgy's happened

But I don't think the whole thing Was set up entirely in bad faith She's going to travel to Berlin And just blend in Never see her again Like Jason Bourne How long can you survive in Berlin on 500 pounds So nondescript

A month ago my friend decided It would be a good idea Why does it make it sound like this woman has no agency And my friend decided it was a good idea So I had to give her money Did you not get a saying Whether you wanted to go on this trip Because she also doesn't seem that bothered

about the trip not happening. It's like the friend decided it was a good idea and the friend decided it wasn't a good idea and the whole time she's just passively been there like literally just shut up and take my money. Just have it. I don't understand. How long do you think you could realistically go

before you being friends with this person and not giving them the money back? I mean you could go a whole lifetime never returning the money but do you mean how long could this person get away with it before the original poster says we aren't friends anymore. Yeah. The original poster's a dormant. The original poster will stay friends of this person

forever and I hope they might get a few measly shekels back. I think I could go a few months. What, if you were the original poster? Yeah. I'm very trusting. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like, I would say I'd let it slide, but it would be a simmering resentment forevermore. It's the sort of thing

that would be the big one, and then next time, after I'd finally sort of said, no, no, it's all forgiven. They'd be like, oh, can I borrow three pound 50 for a drink and I'd be like absolutely not remember when you stole of 500 pounds and I'd be like wow why you're holding a grudge because I'm holding a grudge how long would you go until you lawyered up me yeah I'd know like four weeks four weeks four hours I've got a lawyer on retainer from any of my friends have pissed me off next time someone seems like they're being

it's stingy I'd love to lend you some money but I can't because I spend it all on the retainer for my lawyer You remember you took that pen last week and you never gave it back You've been served Yeah

Nothing kills a friendship faster than lawyering up In my experience Well your friends shouldn't do stuff that warrants Lawyering up really should they Like taking the last chip off my plate Oh my God I'd be so furious Yeah I wouldn't lawyer up over a chip

I do get pretty mad when people are like, oh, I'm not hungry, oh, and they're like, can I try that? And they're asking to try something that, like, they've definitely had before, like chips. But I wouldn't get a lawyer involved. Like, chip. Can I try that? It's chips. I have a friend who, like, hate spending money. And there's always like, no, I'm fine, I don't want anything. They're like, oh, can I try a chip?

Like, what in the fuck's name are you talking about? Can you try a chip? Yeah, you can try a chip. You can try buying some chips. Pretty exotic while we're on holiday. Why not? Why not try new things? I will have this chipped potato.

How novel. This being said, the language being used here is all slightly odd, overly formal language. So maybe the O.P. is going to lawyer up. If she was planning to book everything as per agree. I think you'll find that my client willfully gave the money of their own accord to their prior agreement. Then there are people saying, oh, did you ever see proof that she'd made a booking? I don't feel that that's relevant at this stage in the game. At this stage, the only thing's relevant is...

She made a booking, the whole thing changes. Does it? Yeah, because I assume she got the money to make a booking. If she made the booking, does she get all the money back? Yeah. It changes everything. That's a, if she'd, if she used the money and made the booking and she's waiting for the refund on the booking, and all she has herself right now is cash. That's an entirely different scenario.

Yeah. I still think it was weird of her to decide unilaterally that they were going on a trip and then say, I don't fancy this trip. But. Not this trip. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe the O.P. made such a meal out of giving over the 500 pounds. She thought, don't want to do this anymore. So the OPs come back.

She sent me a link. My total share was going to be £490. Caught me right in the beginning of what was going to be a terribly busy week at work, so I transferred her the money, and she said she'd send the receipt afterwards. Two days later, she told me she'd reconsider because the location wasn't ideal, but that she'd take care of it and find something better, so I just left the money with her. This is weird. This is very weird. Scam, she's been after that £500 since you're at uni. She saw you first day.

freshman walking into uni with £500 £500 burning a hole in your pocket She thought I'll have that This saps mine Someone said Why don't you ask if you could go and pick the cash up from her And the OPE said she lives 30 minutes away

The OPE is such a wet blanket 30 minutes is nothing 30 minutes is fine I don't know anyone who lives within 30 minutes Apart from you Oh yeah If I'd somehow duped you into giving me £500 And told you it was in cash

Surely you'd just be like, okay, where's the cash then? I'd have already lowered up. Well, I just don't understand any of this. Lots of people want to know why it would now be in cash, and lots of people are doing the classic Mumsnet detective work where they're like, well, this bit doesn't stack up and this bit doesn't stack up as if that makes them super clever, but it doesn't make you super clever

because it's really obvious that none of it stacks off. It's not like it was a foolproof plan. You're the only person who's cracked it. Sherlock Holmes in the case under £500. Sherlock Holmes in the case of the frozen hamster is better. Yeah. Because a hamster could be a murder weapon. Then it falls out, just a hamster again.

Okay, so then the OPs come back and said, Exact text I sent five plus minutes ago was, hey, I'll be somewhere near your place tomorrow, so wondering if you'd be home. I could just come and collect the cash and save you the trouble. The next text from me as well. Why do you have it in cash, though? L.O.L.

Oh. It's just these passive-aggressive people who've never learned how to communicate. You don't mean L-O-L. She's not going to read that and be like, oh, she definitely is laughing out loud. She's going to think, oh, this unbearable passive-aggressive woman

realized I stole from her. I need to go to Mexico. I bet she's lawyered up already. Am I being unreasonable? Weird subconscious behavior when women are out for dinner together. Am I being unreasonable? Very keen to check if she's being unreasonable.

What am I in the reasonables in that title? I was out for dinner yesterday evening with four female friends. We're all early 40s. No problem whatsoever with ordering cocktails, but when it came to ordering from the food menu, one friend chimed in first with the line, I'm just going to go for a salad. And, as always happens, everyone else followed suit with the salads. Does anyone else find this, or is it just me? One friend did ask for some fries for the table, but then everybody just looked at them until they got taken away. I'm not on a diet and nor is anyone else as far as I can tell, so why does this happen?

Then, when it came to dessert orders, there was an uncomfortable silence before everyone declined, of course. Then we had a pot of mint tea. Nobody ate the bread either. It was my turn to pay and I felt like the actual food part of the menu was only there for decoration. Am I being unreasonable to think this kind of behaviour goes on a lot without women even realising they're doing it? as if it's fine to knock back three cocktails, but nobody eats a chip. Oh, women. This is some sex in the city, 90s sitcom stuff.

Four women go for cocktails and salad. Always getting salad, aren't they? Talking about shoes and boys. Oh. Women. You ever notice when you're at a restaurant and all the women get a salad? Am I right, men?

Way. They order the fries for the table, but... They just... sit there, am I right? Aww. And what's the deal with airline food? It's bad. Yeah.

Because the conditions on the airline aren't ideal for making food. No. Yeah. It does all read like someone's trying out a bit of observational humour that they think is going to kill. Yeah. Instead, it's just dying on its ass.

I think this is Seinfeld. This is Seinfeld's new project. Oh my God, Seinfeld's new project is just going on Momsen. Seinfeld's back, and his new medium is Mumsnet. Do you see the new Seinfeld special on Mumsnut? It's really good. Really good. He's back on farm.

I want Kramer back. Oh no. What if it's Louis C.K. Oh. He's cancelled. We shouldn't be reading this. If it was Seinfeld. It can't be Seinfeld, though, because it just says a salad.

It doesn't say a big salad. That is more Seinfeld. It's not the big salad. No. Kramer comes bursting in in the third. reply down the third reply down should say what the third reply down is

the third reply down just says nor mine now do that in kramer's voice nor mine hey jerry hey jay it's me kramer textbook would you rather

did kramer get cancelled as well oh no you used all those slurs oh god yeah kramer's oh yeah oh yeah oh i hope this isn't either. Who would you rather go for dinner with? Three unbearable women who are performatively ignoring chips and eating salad or Jerry Seinfeld. Jerry Seinfeld. Really? Yeah, it's Jerry

Seinfeld. I don't think I could face going to dinner with him. You wouldn't go to dinner with Jerry Seinfeld? No, I don't think I would. He's fine. Last of the 90s comedian's standing. Yeah, but sometimes I like peace and quiet and I don't think I'd get it with Jerry Seinfeld. Well, no, but it's just for one evening. No. There's so much negativity there, isn't there? Negativity. It's just very negative.

No, he's not. What are you talking about? He's a ray of sunshine compared to, you know, look at today's TV. It's always sunny in Philadelphia. That's true. That's like the modern science. It's just all of his observational comedy just seems to be him being like, look at this thing, it's not very good.

Like, that's all well and good. I like to point out stuff that's shit too, but if I was just trying to eat my food. I suppose. Jerry, can you pass the salt? Oh, salt? Why we were putting this on food? Putting little rocks on food. Exactly.

I just want the salt, Jerry, please. Exactly. It would be so exhausting. So exhausting. You put the parmesan on for me, but I have to put my own salt and pepper on. What is this? Jerry, just have the parmesan. God's sake.

Yeah. Can I talk to you about something serious? My hamster died this morning. Look, I'm just going to go through and pick out some bits of this. No problem whatsoever with ordering the cocktails. This comes up twice with the ordering of the cocktails. And I don't know if this is someone who is puritanical about alcohol, which is one thing. Or someone who is very mindful of the calorie content of alcohol.

And if it's that, I think this person might be an insufferable judgey bore. And maybe people are always ordering salads and not eating chips because you make them uncomfortable because the sort of people who feel the urge to tell you how many fucking calories there are in a pinocalada are not the sort of people you want to enjoy any food around because they'll tell you how many calories are in everything. And the false equivalence between ordering cocktails and ordering chips makes you think this person might be a calorie bore. They're not the same thing.

They're very different. One friend chimed in. It sounds like you don't like your friends very much. was chiming in saying what she's going to order when it's time to order food chiming in and chiming sounds like the sort of words you'd use if you didn't really like women much

it's got a sort of undertone of thinking it was a bit shrill, a bit chippy internalised misogyny yeah unless it is just misogyny and it is Louis CK yeah Louis CK and four female friends for a salad just Louis CK and Amy Poehler

How Amy Poehler remains uncancled when she literally has never spoken out about any of this and wrote a chapter in her book about how Louis C.K. is like the best. It's quite beyond me. I'm not saying she needs to be fully cancelled. She did very well at the Oscars, although Maya Rudolph was also on stage and what's better. Maya Rudolph is just the best at everything. If you could have Maya Rudolph, why would you also bring Amy Poehler into the mix? when there's a possibility that she'll still think that Louis C.K. is worthwhile, and she might tell you that. She's not going to say that on the Oscar stage, though. She's got that much now.

Cancel culture is bad. We shouldn't go around cancelling people, but I do think that there are some questions around Amy Poehler's integrity that no one seems to be asking. Who would order the chips if you were at dinner with you, Maya Rudolph, Tina Faye and Amy Poehler? Everyone. Possibly there'd be a salad for the table that would get stared at until it was taken away, but everyone Yeah, yeah, take away the salad And having questioned Amy Poehler's integrity, that is a dinner that I want to go to Also Jerry Seinfeld is a waiter

Okay, that's fine, I can get on board with that You can't be rude to him, he's serving stuff Why would you not eat the bread? Bread is free Maybe they didn't... A salad and bread is a bit of weird choice Also, it depends what salads you get If you get like a salad of iceberg lettuce And grated carrot Yeah, that's ridiculous

You should have stayed home The food you've eaten is terrible Why don't you just go to a cocktail bar But if you get like a lovely salad With all sorts of nice bits and dressing Like a really good Greek salad Or there was a place that I went to the other week And I had a Caesar salad

But instead of having bacon on it It had like Hulumi type stuff And it was delicious It was much more delicious than fries would be, and definitely much more delicious than that bread that comes in the basket at the restaurant. So, like, a salad isn't a single thing. Someone said, it's not subconscious, it's virtue signalling, competitive non-eating, and not a trait I tolerate among my friends. You don't tolerate your friends having a salad. Can I have a salad? I love the salad, please.

Flip the table. That's virtue signalling. I just think starting a thread about what your friends eat is every bit as bad as someone chiming in to say they were having a salad. I think women do have a greater likelihood to have a weird relationship with food because of all the societal pressures on them. Because of Sex and the City. But don't see how this thread is doing anything helpful. Anything helpful at all? Modern remake of Sex and City were Carrie Bradshaw,

instead of writing a diary. Was it a diary or a column? Whatever she wrote. It was a column. Instead of writing a column, she writes on mum's neck, everything that's happened during the day. It's a shot-for-shot remake of Sex and the City, except she writes on Mum's Net, writes Fred's that have happened during the day. When I was at D.P.'s house, I smoked into his fridge. Was I being unreasonable? Yes! Why did you smoke into that man's fridge? I'm going to start a tally of the number of episodes of this podcast where I talk about how angry I am that she smoked into that man's fridge. Because I think it must be coming up for five or six at this point, but I hate it.

She should have smoked in the freezer. That's a place to put things. It's just a weird bubble of frozen smoke in there. Surrounding a hamster. Am I being unreasonable? Husband's new company name. Am I being silly? My husband has decided to go into business with his friend selling laser engraved products,

which are actually really nice and sell well at markets and craft fairs. They've decided to call their company Laser Lads. Many people have commented that this is a brilliant name and think it sums them up. Just two guys with a laser, maiming things and not taking themselves too seriously. I think that's a typo, but it does say maiming things. I, on the other hand, think it's juvenile. It's just the word lads has potential connotations of lad culture, simple blokes and immaturity that may not exactly represent what I think they want to be known as.

a very precise and professional business. Am I just overthinking this? Does anyone else have a problem with the name laser lads? More importantly, would you be put off buying something from them because of the name? Any advice would be appreciated. Just two lads with a laser. Just two men with a laser. Maming things.

Maming things. So there are two things that are possibly happening here. One, is that this person is just a wet blanket. Connotations of lad culture. Oh, simple blokes, whatever. Two, this person has decided that they're going to try and use Mumsnet to do some marketing for laser lads. Look, it's a bad name. I don't think anyone's arguing about that.

Oh, no. It's not offensive or anything. It's just unremarkable. Yeah. But it is a bit unremarkable. Just two lads with a laser. Better names. Laser fare, like laissez-faire.

But then don't people think that it's a bit slapdash? Maybe. But to be fair, that sounds accurate. Yeah. For these two lad to a laser. Maming things. Yeah. Laser fare, hells.

Laser Quest. Okay, I mean, that's an existing business. Laser Rest. You've tried Laser Quest, now try laser rest. Laser Best would have worked better for that. Laser Boy, and then people might think of lazy boy, The brand. Not bad.

And that's a well-known brand. Not bad. Don't lase me, bro. Yeah. Maybe they should just fuck with a nice name that doesn't have laser in it because I don't think you need the name

of what you're doing. Most brand names aren't that on the nose. I think the on-the-nosedness is a wider problem than the lads thing. They should focus on what they are making or naming. Not how they're making it. Yeah. So, for example, if they do laser-engraved jewelry,

jewellets, jewel-doy, Jewel Boys Jewel boys Oh you know Something to do with joy Yeah Should we hear from the thread It would probably put me off

I agree with you Just sounds like two lads Pissing About with lasers That's your name That's the name Two lads pissing about with lasers Two lads pissing about with lasers As a quest red TV show

Waiting to happen I think it's already a YouTube channel I think you're very right It sounds like a stag party laser quest type event or something. It does. Also, the word lad has a different meaning these days to the one you mentioned. Ladmag culture,

bad lads army, lads on tour, get them out for the lads. No, that's the same thing they've mentioned. That is lad culture. They should change it. They should change it. The lads should get together and address this. Because lad culture gets a bad rep. All the lads need to get together at their annual convention,

Ladcon, and start thinking about how to make things better for lads. With a rebranding exercise. Someone said, just two guys with lasers maiming things and not taking themselves too seriously. Do they mean naming or maiming? You can't spell something correctly on your advertising taglines. It also sounds like two six-formers who developed a company for BTEC business class.

It sounds like laager louts. That it doesn't. Not really. Only if you're really trying. Laser louts. A name wouldn't really put me off a product, but an advertising attempt on Mumsnet under the guise of an hour being unreasonable would ensure I never made a purchase.

Ooh, caught them. I don't think it isn't... Caught them out, Mumsnet police. Who is their target audience and what is their USP? I don't think they've got that far. They're just two lads, pissing about with lasers. Yeah, target audience, lads, USP, pissing about with lasers. Yeah, and now there's just lots of people coming in, being all like, bustling about...

A company name has never put me off. buying anything. A place of plug on a non-commercial forum, however. A non-commercial. I don't even think they know what... Mumset is riddled with advertising. I can see four ads right now. Also, Momsnet have threads that they pin to the top of the boards that are advertising. I don't know this one at the moment. I wouldn't come to Mumsnet and be surprised to be advertised at. Yeah, Mumsnet is commercial. It's not a public enterprise. If I paid my taxes for Mumsnet, I would not be happy. Nationalised Mumsnet.

Join the campaign. I really don't want them to nationalise Momsnet. I really don't. That's how Labour can get the votes of the working mothers. I say could they nationalise Mumsnet and then privatise Mumsnet? Because once something's being nationalised then gets privatised, it all falls apart anyway, goes to shit. Like the rail system?

So maybe we need to pull a rail system on Mumsnet and then it'll all go wrong and we'll, you know, stop falling down this rabbit hole and all the translobes will have to shut the hell up. Today, the Minister for Mumsnet announced sweeping changes to the platform. It's a good job for Chris Grayling. Yeah, sure. Okay. I can tell you right now, if we had a minister for Mumsnet, the government would give it to a white man. Oh, yeah. Yeah, no self-awareness.

I don't know, I think that's all Mumsnet deserves. It's a hotbed of bigotry. It's pure white feminism. The only time that white feminists ever seem to realize that sometimes, things are a bit shit is when a man is doing something so make them feel shit, like they make everyone else feel shit. Ciss hair, white feminists, just being horrible.

That's what Mumsnet is. Give it to Chris Grayling. I'll pay some taxes if it fucks off all these people. I don't mind. I don't mind. That little bit that I get tax that's like the extra bit after a certain threshold. Give all of that to Mumsnet. Give it to Mumsnet to tear it down. Yeah, Layser Ladd are actually our sponsor.

Yeah. We got in touch behind the scenes. and we were like, look, if you're going to use Mumsnet to do advertising, we can help. It didn't even have read. We just made it up. Am I Being Unreasonable? Waiting for 13 years. A sequel to Waiting for Godo. Am I being unreasonable, friend at work making no effort to stay in touch. At work? Go to their desk.

Yeah, a bit weird. Just look at them over the laser and say, are you okay? You're right, lad. Am I being unreasonable to wish that Am I Being Unreasonable Was reserved for Am I Being Unreasonables Whoa It's like the inception of Am I Being Unreasonable Puguechew

Am I being unreasonable? Sequins Not at Christmas What? Sequins are for every day Sequins are neutral Sequins are neutral Like leopard print That was Anna Wintor

That wasn't something that I made up People laugh at me about this I've never pretended it wasn't Anna Wintor I've often said, that's Anna Wintel who said that. Anna Wintel said that leper printer's a neutral, and she would know. So, with that, she didn't say anything about sequins, but I think sequins are in neutral. That's where this ends.

Right, then. On that battling rant, wrap it up. Next week, Crafty Women, on the 14th of March, we're doing knitting. We're going to do arm knitting. So I don't really know how that works, but it'll be great.

It's at 7pm at the Hope in Peckham on the 14th of March. Come along if you're a woman or non-binary person. If you're a man, we can't stop you coming to the pub. It's a pub, but you can't sit with us. Yeah, come to my group where we piss around with a laser. Laser lads. Laser lads. I wrote an essay about the culture of irony.

Very good. And how it's bad and feeds capitalism. Where can we read it? Medium.com slash at Simon X-X.X. Very good. Yeah. Thanks for listening. Yeah, thanks a lot.

We appreciate it. Follow us out why you be unreasonable for all the unreasonable things. And for Mumsnet chat. Yeah. If you have any Mumsnet threads that you've read or come across, send them to us there. Yeah, please do. Slide into our DMs. We love it when you slide into our DMs.

Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Bye-bye. Right now, right now