You Are Being Unreasonable - 101 - Jostling the car at a petrol station and a journey to The Magical Cavern

Episode Date: June 10, 2021

CONTENT WARNING: This episode includes discussion of eugenics, forced sterilisation, the Holocaust, and child abuse. It's all contained in the discussion of the fourth thread from 24:50 to 30:12. "Believe it or not, it's Mr. Bean." Delving back into the Room 101 of Mumsnet to dig up the most unreasonable and frankly immoral threads on the AIBU board. What if your partner tells you that they're not your friend? What places in the world give you the weirdest, most immaculate vibes? Should you charge your partner rent or charge for the "wear and tear" of the white goods? Should you move in the car at a petrol station or will that cause petrol to spill? And is it immoral (yes) to force the sterilisation (yes) of someone who "doesn't deserve" to have a child (yes)?

Hello, a quick content warning before this episode. One of the threads features discussion of eugenics and sterilization and child abuse. It's towards the end. So if you don't want to hear that, turn the podcast off after free threads. Okay, let's go. All I know, driving on drugs feels better when their prescription. All I know, the world looks beautiful. The world looks so damn beautiful.

I feel fantastic, and I never felt as good as how I do right now. But maybe when I think about I felt that day When I felt the way that I do right now Right now I feel fantastic And I never felt as good as how I do right now Except for maybe when I think about I felt that day When I felt the one

Welcome to Your Being Unreasonable A podcast about people being unreasonable On Mumset.com With me, Hells And me, Simon, we're here for episode 101. 101. The number of cruel Dalmatians that killed Crewella DeVille's mom

Now in cinemas. Yeah, or the room with all the bad shit in it. So that seems more appropriate for this board. Yeah. Welcome to Mumsnet 101. Introduction to Mumsnet. Yep, that's what this podcast is. Yeah.

Things that you need to know about Mumsnet, it's terrible. Yep. We look at terrible places on the internet and discuss them. Terrible forums. Mumsnet's I might be an unreasonable forum. Last episode, we looked at Reddit's schedule the UK forum. One time we just looked at the birds board on Mumsnet, and that was charming. The birds board, yeah.

Great. Should we do a speed round? Let's. Am I being unreasonable? Church halls. The Mumsnet chicken of wedding venues? Yeah. No, no.

I don't mean. That's an, I think they are the chicken of wedding venues. The Mumsnet chicken. Oh. Am I being unreasonable? Haven Swim booking query, 2021. Oh, this sounds stressful. It sounds like, booking is stressful at the best of times.

Don't ask Mumsnet. Am I being unreasonable that sometimes stiff up a lip is the best policy. It's served Britain well these hundreds of years. Mm-hmm. Amma being unreasonable in thinking that if the display model of an item in a shop has a big sign on it saying available to take away today? Then you can take it away today? No. We just don't know.

No. We just don't know. Great. Should we do it full thread? Let's. Am I being unreasonable? I'm not your friend. Being told by my wife of, well, about 15 years.

A few weeks ago, I didn't think much about it. Tonight, though. What the fuck? So who are you, woman? Right. sparse. I like this sparse prose approach to a mum's net post. Yeah, it's almost a little prose poem. It is. It's formatted weirdly as well. Lots of ellipsies. Yeah, ellipsies, been told by my wife of comma. Well, comma. About 15 years ellipses. New line. A few weeks ago,

ellipses. New line. Didn't think about it much. Elipses. Tonight, though, WTF, three question marks. So who are you, woman, three question marks? Yeah. Interestingly punctuated. Hmm. I like it. But information for actually solving this is sparse. So the partner of the wife has been told, I'm not your friend. I'm not your friend. I'm not here to make friends. I don't know why I'm here.

I'm not here to make friends. I'm here to be married for 15 years, about 15 years. Well, about 15 years. Maybe that's part of the problem. Maybe that's why this friendship has started to sour. ITV's new reality TV show, The Wife. I'm not here to make friends. I'm here to be a wife and get the prize money.

Oh, it's a reality show. I see. I was picturing a Sunday night three-part drama in which the wife is clearly played by Saran Jones. No doubt about it, the wife is Saran Jones. I don't know. I mean, I would say that you and I are friends, right? Best friends.

We love to laugh. We do love to laugh. We have fun every day. Like friends. maybe these two don't love to laugh maybe they just like to do meal planning uh rotate the garden rear children get discounted joint car insurance deals but it's not a loveless manage it's a friendless marriage it's a friendshipless marriage deeply in love but not friends uh yeah i guess what i'm what i'm imagining is something much more boring

than that. Yours actually sounds like one of those whirlwind relationships where people are like hurling things at each other and screaming and then they're having sex and then they're hurling things at each other and screaming and then they're slamming doors and then they're having sex and then they're slamming doors and then they're screaming. Yeah, deeply in love but do you not like to spend time together or do activities together like a friend. Yeah, I guess what I was picturing was much more like Middle England, extremely sad, Alan Partridge pre-divorce. Oh, yeah. That is sad. I do need to know, like, what is the context? Do you think they were just, like, sitting having dinner and she'd just cutting up her food?

I'm not your friend. Then just carried on. I'll just assume it came out of something in the conversation. Just on her way out the door to go to the supermarket. Okay, it's for anything you need? No, okay, I'm not your friend. Bye. Don't know, maybe they were picking teams in PE and...

Well, wouldn't someone else enough to have a wife be doing PE? Picking teams at some kind of sporting event. And she didn't pick him. And he was like, what, I thought we were her friends. And she was like, I'm not your friend. I'm here to win this game of five aside. That means not you, husband, or wife. The first comment says, what?

She's your wife. Why are you confused? As if this is a normal... I don't know. I think this does reflect a cultural thing for generations older than us where your husband and wife, you're not necessarily friends.

You know what I mean? It's a different dynamic of being married. I don't know. All the ones are like, like all the examples I can think of, like my parents, my grandparents, they seem like friends. Someone once said to me about my parents that it seemed odd that they seemed like such good friends. Like, you know, in primary school when someone comes over for dinner and they're like, I can't believe they're your parents. They seem like friends. It's really stuck with me because it made me wonder what

the hell went on in her house. Um, um, obviously when you're like nine, you can't say like, is everything okay. Like, I don't what the deal is at your house, but it sounds a bit sad. But this is what I mean. It's this, perhaps, I'm calling it a generational thing, but this generational thing where you know, the wife is a nagging, Harrodden, and the husband sits in a chair all day, watches the football and goes to the pub. Yeah, but I guess it's, you know, a relationship of, I don't know, mutual convenience. Societyal expectations. Societal expectations is a good. Yeah. But not friendship. Okay, yeah, I see what you mean. They're not mates. We're mates.

We're mates. We're mates, right, right, yeah. And I see you in the hallway. You're right, mate. On my way to the living room. Yeah, mates and for the last, you know, year, co-workers in some senses. Colleagues.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cueing for the microwave. Yeah. Is that buddy? Meeting at the water cooler we had installed.

Yeah. You mean the little bit in the fridge door? Standing at the fridge door on hot days Yeah, someone's pulled the OP up Where they've said What the hell are you then, woman? Woman, nice, context is everything This post is impossibly vague

You don't sound like you're very friendly You sound like you're looking for a reason to be offended They're not looking for friends They didn't come here to make friends Post is vague I'll give it that It is I'll give it that

Someone has said So your wife said to you That she's not your friend And it's taken a couple of days for you to realise you're not okay with that because a husband and wife should be friends. A few more words from you would really help O.P. I tell my husband he's not my friend because I don't trust him in any way, shape or form. Goodness me.

I start counselling on Monday and it's none of my husband's business. Well, really too much information about that poster. I don't think it matters either way, but do we know the sex or the gender of the O.P.? We don't, no. So it could be a wife and a wife. Yeah. I kind of hope it is a wife and a wife because of all the people who come along

to hoike their boobs about angrily to say, oh, people don't like being referred to as woman. All right, I mean, like, that's some basic-ass 90s feminism. There's a bit in clueless where a 15-year-old girl is like, I hate it when you call me woman. Like, come on. You don't know, I don't know why it annoys me so much,

but it does. Unless, of course, the wife is non-binary and then probably would object to being called woman. Yes, yeah. Maybe there's that. The OP has come back. We don't know. Their post is impossibly vague.

Impossibly vague. The OP has come back and said, I'm sorry, yes, this was a bit vague. We were making arrangements for another week. I wasn't happy with some, so I politely declined to participate. We were making arrangements for another week. And then people have said,

this hasn't helped at all like me. It's still too vague. Possibly vague. Another week of marriage? They renew it every week. Like that person on Jeremy Vine. A few months ago ago thought, people should do.

Yeah, how long did they think the contract should last before? I think they said, like, you should have to renew your marriage every year. That's what pagans do. And if you're bored, you just, you know, go off on your way, on your merry way. A pagan hand fasting in some traditional, like some traditions, in some pagan traditions, a hand fasting is supposed to last for a year and a day. Cool. And then a year and a day later, you can do your thing.

Obviously, like, that doesn't apply in all cases and some people have handfasting. ceremonies, but then they have like a marriage in the legal sense. So I'm not, don't at me with explaining how paganism works. I get that there are lots of varieties. But maybe there are lots of pagans listening to Jeremy Vine and we just didn't realize. So the Ops come back one more time and says, oh, this isn't about being reasonable or not. It's just the sentence, not your friend. I like her. We get on. We take care of things we care about. But we're in our 40s. I'd like to be friends with someone I like. Sorry, just, well, not sure what to do with this. not sure, because you've come to the

Am I Being Unreasonable Board with a question that's not about being unreasonable or not? Fuck off. Someone who said, sounds like you're male. So, should we move on? It's on the board for you, pal. It's on the board for you, man. Maybe it's a wife who has been on Mum's Net for so long

that they have really internalised that if you're married, you shouldn't have male friends. Yeah. Because that's somehow inappropriate. Yeah. Oh, if you're married, you shouldn't have male friends. My husband is male. Therefore, we have another logician on the boards.

Shall we do another thread? Please. Am I being unreasonable, places you have visited with a strange vibe. Hi, I'm off to Saltburn near Whitby tomorrow and I feel sick. I visited last March, the weekend, before the lockdown. The place was so eerie. I was actually freaked out on the pier and had to run off it. I actually managed to sleep at night, but honestly, I didn't think I would.

The cottage was surrounded by cliffs And there was a Victorian lift And a small morgue by the beach I'm not sure whether these have anything to do with it Has anyone else had this feeling From a place they have visited? Hell are you. Here we go to salt, though.

Interesting psychogeography, yeah man I really want to go to this place Why are you going back? I need to know more about why you're going back Is it because you enjoyed that eerieness? It doesn't sound like you did It doesn't sound like it But something in it attracted you

Like watching a David Lynch film You didn't understand it but there's something alluring, attractive about it that pulls you back. Just vibes, just immaculate vibes. Yeah, are you saying that Salt Burn is the David Lynch films of places? I think I am. I think I am, health. Have you ever been to Salt Burn? No, I haven't.

No, I mean either, but I am putting it on the list. This sounds incredible. Why does it have a small morgue by the beach? And why does the adjective Small do so much heavy lifting in making that creepier? I'm just actually like a single person more, which would be the spookiest thing ever. Spooky. Too spooky. We quite like strange vibes in our holidays.

Yeah, we do. I'm thinking of when we rented a car for a day trip to Kent, and we saw like a sort of blasted landscape. I think it's called the Isle of Grain. It's like a little peninsula just off Kent. And we just drove down there, and it was like industrial. There was a factory in the distance. There was no sort of life in any. It was like Chernobyl.

Yeah, it was. Really strong vibes. Spooky. Yeah. Loved it. So weird. So, so weird. Mm-hmm.

And I'm thinking we meet, when I was young, we used to go. I forget where it was, but it was a sort of a northern seaside town. And it had the smallest church in England or the UK. Just a very tiny church on the beach, sort of made out of shells and rocks. Ooh. Room for like six people in there. Weird, weird vibes. We went to the magical cavern in Prague.

The magical cavern. So weird. It was very strange. It was very... We were walking through Prague, walking through this park, and we started seeing signs pinned to trees and stuff like for magical cavern. The kind of trees that you'd see in a cartoon that a child follows into an obvious trap. Yeah.

And we started following the signs to the magical cavern. And it was just kind of... It felt like it used to be where they kept the parkkeeper's equipment. Like, It didn't seem like it had a card in nature. It was just like a concrete bunker in the middle of a park, which is filled with like blacklight paintings. And a man...

And fantasy shit, like dragons and sculptures of dragons and throw pillars and ornate rugs, like a game of Thrones room. Yeah, and a man who... Imagine the man that you might see at the magical cavern. That's probably what you're picturing, right? Whatever you imagine, the man at the magical cavern looks like, that's what he looked like,

who promised us that if we got to the end of the magical cavern, there would be sangria but it wasn't sangria at all it was just like diluting juice yeah and and you know being the the sort of smart streetwise savvy people we are we went into his little bunker on the premise of sangria yeah you have to go through the whole thing and if you reach the end you get sangria we're like yeah we'll go deeper and deeper into this man's bunker and then we'll drink something from this junk yeah anyway somehow we weren't murdered And we just left and So now we lived to

Back out into Prague Live to go to Saltburn Lucky else Yeah Cootnahorra Bone Church That's a great place Yes I was disappointed

Not to be on that trip with you Yeah I love the Coquins It's a church made out It's what it sounds like It's a church made out of bones Yeah It's a proper blood-born

Dark Souls location Love it And it's in a really funny Little town Where there's like Just a bad Italian restaurant And a gelatoria

And a bone church So we went to the bone church, then we all had Totholulu and Brodo, and then we had an ice cream. Delicious. It was a great day out. I went somewhere in the Czech Republic that was like a really cutesy, old-fashioned town. But then when we were on the way there, someone on the coach was like, oh, are you going here because you saw it on Saw? Like, I heard it was a World Heritage Site. They're like, oh.

Yeah. Is it Saw entirely set in one room? I don't know. I think it's quite a big franchise, isn't it? It is, yeah. It could be in any of the source. It could be in spiraled, the Book of Saw. Sorry. Chris Rock, now in cinemas. Sorry, this has turned into when people tell you about how they just love to travel.

Oh my God, I love to travel. If we were telling these stories and any of them involved either being in South America backpacking or making a Nepalese local crime with your deep and profound insights, I would unsubscribe. So I don't know why I think it's appropriate to do it when I'm just talking about the Czech Republic. love to travel though and we love to laugh we do love to laugh so yeah these are some places that have a strange vibe but i guess the difference is i went to all of these places intentionally for the strange vibe whereas it sounds like this person went to saltburn hated it oh an accidental

strange vibe and then something in saltburn has latched onto their soul and has drawn them back against their better judgment it doesn't sound like they're looking forward to their next trip no it sounds like they're in the film st maud yeah it does It seems like they're, I don't know, somehow cursed. Maybe it's a curse, and they have to... Great vibes. Apparently, people say similar about Glastonbury. Lastonbury.

Someone said, Hepton still above Hebden Bridge is super atmospheric. Yeah, I've been there. Someone said, gosh, what made you freak out on the pier and run off of it? They said, I'm not sure. It was pitch black and the pier was so long. Why do you go to the end of the pier in the pitch black? This is on you. Pier would be creepy if you went in the pitch black and you'd never been before.

Yeah, there was a shimmering light at the end of the pier that was calling my name and I walked towards it for a long time and then it disappeared, leaving me cold and empty. So I went back. And then here are some pictures of saltburn. So... Yeah, it does look weird. It's a real shame that in the picture they've tried to show how weird and isolated it is, there's just three cars on quite a big road. Like, okay. Looking at the photos made my... makes my body feel wobbly, the OP says. Like, why did you post them? Why are you going back?

This is so weird. Someone else said the one time they went to Salt Burn, they were overcome by a migraine suddenly. Never had one not start first or last thing in the day. Also, Salt Burn gave you a migraine. We need to go to Salt Burn. Yeah, that's some of it spooky in Saltburn. So it's spooky in Saltburn. Is Whitby where Dracula came aground? Yeah, it is. In Bramstoker's Dracula?

Yeah. His ship crashes in Whitby, right? So all the goffs go there. Yeah. Every winter, summer. Yeah. Probably winter. They're goffs.

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. If you want to get dressed up to impressy goth mate, summer's not the time to do it. There's nothing worse than seeing a goth. Too hot, sweaty goffs. Struggling through the summer. There used to be some great goths who worked at the local Astor when I was a teenager

and they would have their bright green Astor uniforms on. They worked in the produce section. But then even in the height of summer, they'd have their bright green uniforms and then they're like long black matrix jackets that they put over their uniforms as they'd stand sheltering from the sun in the smoking shelter like, oh, the produce goths are struggling again. Too hot.

Too hot. I think what I need to know really is why you would intentionally go somewhere eerie if that wasn't your vibe. Yeah, if you don't want to go somewhere eerie, if you're not spooky like us. And then someone's come along to say, that's not a lift, that's a finicular.

Love a place with a finicular. Can't be a finicular. Mother Shipton's cave is a good one Yeah That's, you know Mother Shipton lived there She was reportedly a witch But it's got these natural water formations

Where anything you put under them becomes rock Hmm And now people are just talking about Visiting Former Jails So let's just move on This has just got a bit It's not the same at all It's not the same

Am I being unreasonable To charge my partner rent My partner and I would like to live together I found a house in a location suitable for both of us From my divorce, I'm able to buy the house by myself, and my brain, rather than my heart, knows it's the sensible thing to do. We've talked about him living with me there, and he said he'd pay rent. It certainly seems the right thing to do, but I feel really uncomfortable about it, like it will change the whole dynamic between us.

Is anyone in a similar situation where they've done something similar? I would like to just say, I chose this not so much for the OP itself, but for some of the incredible comments from the cheekiest fuckers who do not. know how to conduct a relationship. What are your initial thoughts? Is she buying the house out right? It really doesn't matter. But if he's contributing to paying the mortgage through what we're calling rent, then I don't think that's a problem at all. It'll certainly go towards bills and stuff. If he's contributing towards the mortgage by paying rent and he's not on the mortgage, though, I think that's a little bit odd. Yeah? Yeah, he's paying her mortgage and he gets no long-term security out of it. Yeah, that is true. You'd want some kind of contract. And if the relationship

it breaks down then he's just paid a load of her mortgage and he has nothing to show for it and also has to move out he'd be more secure private printing that is a good point you'd want some kind of contract which would change the dynamics yeah or if she can afford it anyway why doesn't he just pay half the bills and save his money towards i don't know buying into it at some point if that becomes appropriate or buying another place or buying a load of pedigree dogs for all i care i think it's i think it's super weird to have someone pay towards your mortgage if they are not benefiting from it. She's just a landlord.

I think you're right. I'll come right round on this. I don't think your partner should be your landlord. No. If we bought this place and for some reason it was only in my name and I was charging you rent, I would be your landlord. That would be super weird. I didn't think about the contract aspects of it.

Yeah. Maybe this is what was going on in that first post. Maybe the wife wasn't a friend. Maybe the wife was a simple landlord. Not your friend. I'm your landlord. So with that, I'd like to read this comment to you.

I think it's right that he should contribute. An extra person living there will add to the wear and tear, especially with white goods. Anilogs love to talk about wear and tear. They absolutely do. Like, I'm sorry, but... Your relationship is dead in the water if your biggest concern is whether living with your partner

is going to add wear and tear to your dishwasher. Every time your partner goes to wash a dish, you're like, no, no, uh, my house, you can use the sink. What about the wear and tear? You're degrading the component. in that dishwasher, actually. Unless you ask your partner for a deposit to live with you. And then whenever you need to replace something,

you take it out of their deposit and you say that it's their fault because you are being a simple landlord. I'm not charging you for reasonable, weren't her? Someone says it's a concern over them making a claim on the house as a relationship goes tits up. That's why we're told to avoid charging rent. Yeah, also that. If the house is yours and you've been taking rent

and then you split up and they try to make a claim on it. You've made it way more complicated than if you bought a house together or you weren't charging rent. Yeah. Someone has said, this is how me in DP do things. I'm older and earn three times he's salary

and he gives me £450 a month. You earn three times his salary and you own a house and you're taking rent from him. No, he's not your partner. He's your lodger. What is going on? I don't understand. I don't understand.

It's weird to frame it as rent I could just specify a general amount that kind of went towards rent and bills combined No but you're still taking rent I'm sorry but if it doesn't add anything to your Housing costs then don't take rent Let him buy some furniture I'll save you some money there

And then if it goes tits up he can take the sofa great Like take money for bills because he lives there But don't charge you just Oh I could never love a landlord I could never love my own landlord I could never have any landlord. Don't become a landlord. We're not friends.

I'll try. I'll do my best. Yeah, calling it rent is weird. It does change the dynamic in a way that is clearer to me now. We've talked about it a little more. And someone has says paying rent could be seen as buying into the house. And then someone else has said, not necessarily, give him a rent book. Imagine.

Oh, I got you a gift. Yes. You know, you put it up, and it's a rent book from your partner. And you're like, what the hell, I'm leaving you. If the OAP did get a rent book, wouldn't that be proof of an oral lease agreement, which then means that the partner gets statutory tenant rights and OPE has landlord responsibilities? And that then not affect her right to evict him, if need be. Evict him!

They need to talk to a solicitor. No, they don't. She just needs to say, look, this is the situation. I own this house. You can pay towards bills. You can buy a nice sofa. You can contribute to the reasonable wear and tear of the white goods. Exactly.

but this is my house so I won't take any money but also you won't have any stake in this house you just live in it and you know it's complicated isn't it when people have different situations like that but I do feel like taking rent from your partner is weird okay one more from mum's net and then we'll do one from Simon am I being unreasonable would it be immoral to secretly sterilise a person a person you feel doesn't deserve to have kids a person whose children are already in care Would you, if you could? So in a nutshell, does anyone feel they could take away the right to have a baby from anyone who could potentially be a danger to a child? You are being unreasonable equals yes.

You are not being unreasonable equals no. FYI, I'm asking, because a friend thinks it's wrong to make such a big decision on behalf of another person. Wow. This is what we're discussing and how am I being unreasonable for... This is the single worst am I being unreasonable I have ever seen and 101 episodes in. you know the things I have seen the things I have seen I'm sorry like I'm really glad that we've got

a lighthearted bit that we can do after this but I couldn't not read this because I feel like sometimes we take a break between episodes and I feel guilty and it's because I see things like this and it drives me I'll let you respond to it and then I'll go off on one well I mean word the Nazis being unreasonable

asking because a friend thinks it's wrong to make such a big decision so a friend thinks that sounds like you don't think that. Sounds like you said to your friend, well, we should just sterilise them. And your friend said, I think that might be wrong. I don't think so. I don't think we can sterilise people against their will.

I think that might be wrong. And you've said, well, I'll go to mum's there because that's where I'll find the biggest group of fascists around who will agree with me. What are you on about? Yeah. I mean, the criteria they've set are rock solid. A person I feel doesn't deserve to have kids. Not a person that doesn't deserve to have kids, which would be terrible.

but a person they feel doesn't deserve to have kids. Yeah, I mean, based on what? I mean... These are terrible conditions. Someone said, I might feel compelled to agree with you on a case-by-case basis in theory, but it's a very slippery slope, and ultimately, no, it's no one else's choice to make. Who would you decide and where would it end? It's a very slippery slope.

It's a slippery slope that's almost a 90-degree angle, because you're straight into eugenics. Someone said, it feels like a Nazi thing to do, slippery slope. It is historically, literally a thing that the Nazis did. And then someone said, normally I'd say this was Godwin's law. But since it was actually the Nazis, it isn't. Yeah, like, everyone's like, what on earth are you on about? Secretly, too.

They put the word secretly in there. How would you even secretly sterilise a person? I was wondering how you could secretly sanitise someone. disappointing spread. I agree you should be able to, but I'm workful in practice. What, you thought this was about secretly sanitising someone? Like, what, squirting them with hand sanitizer? And then you opened it up and you were like, oh, sterilised.

But actually, I do agree with that. It would be unworkable. What are you on about? What a roller coaster. A roller coaster from disappointment to, yeah, in eugenics. Oh, my bad. This is so immoral that it should not be up for discussion. and I'm shocked that this thread is still here.

How old is it? It went up last Saturday. We're recording a full week later. Yeah, I'm just trying to see if the OEP ever comes back. Someone has said here, sorry, there are a small number of cases. I'm not reading that out loud, actually. That's hateful. Basically, someone has come along to try and justify eugenics, which is no.

The OPE has come back and said, I think it's crazy how anyone can think that a child's life or happiness is less important than a person's right to have more children. and that's pretty damn heartbreaking as that. Okay, what? And now they're talking about child abusers, unless, of course, it's a sudden... An unfit person is a fucking child abuser

unless, of course, it's all of a sudden compared to someone of a different race. Wow. Okay, so I think the AP's also just a racist, which I'm, obviously... And then there's a few people coming along like, I don't think it should be secret. I think people should know

if they're being sterilized because they're bad. Yes. no not yes that sounds like you think it's okay to sterilising because they're bad it's not a reprimand you shouldn't secretly sterilise people you shouldn't sterilize people okay good that's that's the assumption that we need covered yeah april or i don't sterilize people you shouldn't sterilize people against their will you shouldn't secretly sterilize people against their will oh my god i don't have the voting function turns on but 38% of the people voting agreed with secretly sterilising a person.

38%. Two out of three Mumsnares said no, but what happened? Yeah, this thread is hateful. This thread is so hateful. Let's go away from Mumsnet. Let's go to Reddit. And go to Reddit's casual UK. I mean, it's so hateful that we would have found something

less hateful of rather than going to Reddit. We were going to Forcham. I was really on the fence about whether to do that thread, but I really, I just need people to know what sort of website this is. so that if we just vanish one day, you understand. I'm really sorry to anyone who had to hear that and was uncomfortable about it, but obviously don't sterilise people. Eugenics is bad.

The party line for this podcast and the world is that eugenics is bad. Let's go to Reddit. Yeah, casualty UK, where we went in the last episode. We did, it was lovely. A lighthearted, casual-based look at the UK. When I was a kid, my mum would tell me off if I moved the car while she was filling it up. She was worried that the petrol would spill out if I rock the car too much. What was this kid doing?

Like getting it out and jostling it like a riot. Yeah, party car. Party in the petrol station. I could have messed up the suspension before they went out and then put on some like banging music, like making the car bounce. And just imagining the mum filling up the car and peering in the window to see how much sort of moving. But then the thread gets into stuff that

parents told you that aren't necessarily true. So mine said, if I don't eat crusts, my hair will not go curly, and I didn't want curly hair. Someone says the opposite. Yeah, my grandma used to say... I heard it will make it curl. My grandma used to say something about cross and curly hair, and she had the most poker straight hair I've ever seen. I was told, if you eat crust, you'll get curly hair.

And, yeah, my nana had very curly hair. Well, a perm. If you eat crusts and you go to the hairdressers, and you pay for it. and sit there for a few hours then. Okay, the cross's really a necessary part of this now that, just eat the crusts. Okay.

My mum said if you pull a face and the wind changes, she'll stay that way. That's not your mum. That's a standard thing that you'll say. I've heard that one. Can't just attribute idioms to our own mothers. Your mum didn't invent idioms, kid. I know that we all think our mum's, you know,

the Beul and Lender one were babbies, but your mum didn't invent idioms. A teacher told me that once when I wasn't even pulling a face. Oh, how rude. Oh, no. My mum told me if I picked my nose, my head will cave in. That is brutal.

You get rid of everything in there, and it just collapses like a mine. That is absolutely brutal. No. My mum said I could grow potatoes in the dirt behind my ears. Yeah. I've heard that one. My parents didn't say it, but I've heard it. I've never heard it, but it feels like it's probably an idiom.

and my parents think installing games on our PC would cause viruses which legit legit tech advice from the parents and not really an idiom at all my parents used to tell me I should save my work regularly back up to the cloud and I've got another from ask UK which is a subredic where people either British or non-British ask questions about the UK okay so who do you consider our most famous person. By our, it means British. Oh, not the most famous person on the sub-Britic.

Okay, that's good to know, because I'm not familiar enough with the sub-redits to know who the most famous person on there is. The most famous British person? Mm-hmm. It's probably the fucking queen, isn't it? A lot of people saying the queen. Someone says, first, the queen. Second, the guy from queen.

Adam Lambert. If you can't name them, even if you're doing a funny bit, a bit of wordplay. It doesn't work, does it? doesn't work. Believe it not, it's Mr. Bean, says someone else. Believe it or not, it's Mr. Bean. Believe it or not. They have no evidence that it is Mr. Bean. Believe it or not.

You gave a Ripley's Believe it or not, and it's just a big sign that says Mr. Bean is the most famous person in the UK. Oh, okay. And we get some David Attenborough's. Living, J.K. Rowling. No. Dead, Shakespeare. Oh, I'm so, bookish.

Look at me. They just adore books. Shut up. Norman Wisdom and Rebecca Vars. Party, what a combo. They're under dead. Is Rebecca Vardy dead? No.

So this person's listed Living, Sir Paul McCartney, Her Majesty the Queen, the ginger one with a small guitar. Who is that? It's here, I think. Oh. And dead. I could only think of Mick Hucknell.

Okay. I was like, why have you... Our most famous person. And dead, Norman Wisdom, William Shakespeare, and Rebecca Vardy. I don't think Rebecca Vardy is dead. Nor is she the most famous person. Rebecca Vardy.

Rebecca Vardy is not dead. What the hell? Oh, someone suggested the ginger one with small guitar might be George Farnby. Yeah, why not? Not a cheer. Yeah, sure. Someone said Winnie the Pooh, which I don't think counts because he's a little bear. He's a bear of very little brains.

Great. Shall we do one more speed round? Please. Am I being unreasonably. to adore American food and snacks. Please share your favourites. Oh, love it. Love a bit of Velveeta.

Love a bit of Velveeta. Am I being unreasonable to look beyond university rankings? Yeah, you should. You should. University rankings are bogus. Am I being unreasonable? Where is McDonald's ice cream? McDonald's.

Amma being unreasonable? Identity fraud. Oh, you need to contact. Not this bored about that. And am I being unreasonable. My husband is in love with Someone else. Advice needed. Oh.

Charge him some rent. Sad. He's probably found a better friend. Yeah. Someone who is his friend. Exactly. Someone who loves to laugh. Loves to laugh and won't say, I'm not your friend. I stare on their way out the door.

Bye, I love you. I'm not your friend. Don't forget to pay the rent. Slipping over a rent book with a note in it. Not your friend. Oh, thank you for listening. Do you have anything that you want to plug? Sure. I was on the Cynotopia podcast last month. So that's May 2021's episode.

Woo. Discussing films with the rest of the panel. Great. And by the time this comes out, I should have a review on Take One of Shiva Baby. A new comedy out next week on New Big. Great. Thank you all for listening. And we will be back in two weeks' time. Yeah, thank you. Thank you. Bye.

how I felt that day when I felt the way that I do right now, right now, right now.