You Be Trippin' - Dominican Republic w/ Ian Lara | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: June 24, 2024

Follow Ian on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/ianlaralive/ Catch Ian Live on tour right now! Tickets here: https://www.ianlaralive.com/roaddates On this episode of You Be Trippin, Ian Lara talks about baseball, power outages, and comedy scene in the Dominican Republic. The two also discuss beautiful women, sex tourism, and Uber Scams. He and Ari also share a local drink called mamajuana. Other topics include: fried food, nightlife, hiking, cigars, urban shows, and the northern countryside. Finally, tourism in the lifeblood of the country so be sure to visit! ¡Vacilando y dímelo cantando! You Be Trippin' Ep. 20 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Where you been and where you going? This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's UB Trippin', yeah. That's the sound of unaged whiskey transforming into Jack Daniel's Tennessee Whis whiskey in Lynchburg, Tennessee. Around 1860, nearest green taught Jack Daniel how to filter whiskey through charcoal for a smoother taste, one drop at a time. This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell.

To hear them in person, plan your trip at Tnvacation.com. Tennessee sounds perfect. Hi everybody, welcome to UB Trippin'. I'm Ari Shaffir, the host. I like to travel around, I like to talk to people about their own trips. And today on UB Trippin', it's a hilarious comedian. His own one hour special is now available on HBO Max. You excited?

Yeah, I'm very excited. I'm excited for everybody to see. What's it called? It's called Romantic Comedy. Romantic Comedy. Ian Laura is the guest today. And Ian Laura is actually a tour guide of mine for a place I went.

Yeah. Are we saying it? Yeah. Oh yeah, for the Dominican Republic. That's where we're headed today, everybody. Dominican Republic. Dominican Republic. I remember you hit me up saying you were going and the shit you were gonna do, and the Dominican Republic. That's where we're headed today, everybody. Dominican Republic. Dominican Republic. I remember you hit me up saying you were going

and the shit you were gonna do and I was like. I was way off. Yeah, I was like, I don't know if this is, you've heard you're gonna stay in a hostel, like in a hospital, and I was like, I don't know if this is safe. Like honestly, if I would've hit up my family and told them that I was gonna go to DR

with the same itinerary you had, they would be like the most, they would send like a team I forgot about that They would send a team for me like to bring me back Cuz it was cuz it was a is that wow, but I gave you some recommendations and it was good I wanna make sure that's it Oh we're done? Yeah

We're feeling It was great Every one of those recommendations worked out fucking flawlessly Yeah, how long were you there for? I was there for? I was there for like five or six days. Five or six days. Yeah, not enough, but I was done in Boston on a Thursday,

and I didn't have San Antonio until the next Thursday, and I had to get my second country in. I've been trying to do two countries a year streak. Two countries a year? Two new countries a year. That's big. Yeah. That's big.

Yeah. It broke in 2020, 2021. And what'd you think? What? DR. Loved it. Loved it. Sold on it. And you didn 2020, 2021. And what did you think? What? The are loved it, loved it, sold on it. And you did. All I did was I looked from Boston. I'm like, where are their direct flights from Boston? Yeah. And it was like Haiti, DR, Cuba.

I almost went to Cuba. And then I was like looking at what to do and I was like, oh, cigar smoking. And I was like, ask Bobby if you want to go. And he goes, I can't. It's in two weeks. I can't go. Yeah. But he goes, I have a family. Yeah. But I would like to go there with you. I'm like, all right. You know what? I'll hold off on Cuba until you can go.

And then DR. DR is great. And you stood in the Capitol, which is like, I mean, that's not resort. It's not like Punta Cana. It's not a resort. But it's DR, but it's very New York-ish. It's a real city.

It's a real city. It's big, too. It's like a major city, yeah. It's like a major city. Where do you mostly go? I go to the Capitol, where you say, Santo Domingo. Yeah, Santo Domingo, that's where I say it. I'm from a town, San Cristobal,

that's like a little bit off. We're actually covering it, right? It's over here. That's Domingo, I see. It's over here on the little boot tip. But that's where all the baseball players are from. All of them. Not all of them, but just most of them.

It used to be San Pedro, which is west of the thing. Why, why? All the baseball players? No, not why they're from there. It was, that's not the story. What was the story with, was it Joe Torre or somebody else? It was the Dodger coach. Joe Torre was a Dodger coach.

No, way before that. When somebody went down there and was like, oh, hey, there's uncharted fucking talent down here. Oh yeah, yeah. I think it might've been the St. Louis, I think it might've been Tony LaRusso. Tony LaRusso. He was a Dodger's coach too, I think. Yeah Yeah, they did and then it was like a minefield. Yeah, he learned

Spanish. He was like, oh fuck. And then he started taking Spanish classes and went back down there and just fucking grab, grab, grab. Yeah. Per capita, I mean, they have less people than I think New York State as a country. It would be like if 30% of the baseball superstars were from New York State. It would be insane, all right? Okay, yeah, let's talk about baseball first. It's fucking massive, though. Oh, I mean, it's the World Baseball Classic next year coming up, and DR won it once. DR won, Puerto Rico won, and USA won.

USA should always win. USA should always win. Size-wise. Yeah. And it's in our country at the highest level, pay-wise. Yeah, yes. And they would if they sent everyone. Oh, right. USA should always win. Size-wise. And it's in our country at the highest level, pay-wise. Yes, and they would if they sent everyone. Oh, right. If they sent everyone. Oh, right.

They, at first, USA wasn't taking it as serious as the other countries were. Because in Dominican Republic, when DR played, it was a holiday. Like, the city shut down when DR was playing in the World Baseball. Really? Yeah, it was a holiday. Like, it meant everything.

It meant everything to the country. And the best players, if you were one of the top elite players and you didn't play for the Dominican team, you would be like, that's like a great dishonor. Would major leagues come back and play for them? Yes. Did Pujols ever play for them? Did Pujols play?

Yeah, Pujols played. He did. Pujols played. He never played for a team there until that year. Until he played for Lice this year. Wasn't Lice or? Yeah. Or it might have been Escojito.

It was Escojito. Escojito. It was Escojito. But he, yeah. But he never played for, cause he can't play when he was at the top of his thing. But the world baseball classic is huge. That's like a, that's not like a,

I went to a game, I went when it was in Miami and I went in San Diego too. It was one of the best experiences I've ever had. It was the best sporting event that I've ever been to. Really? Yeah, for sure. They went wild. I mean, it's insane.

For baseball, they get so fucking rowdy. It was 30,000 people all, I mean, it was like the soccer fans do in Europe. It was like that. Yeah. Yeah, it was insane, insane. But that's what it means to the country is like, it's like for real.

Can I tell you the biggest applause I got in that show? Yeah. Did I tell you? No. I had a top shirt on, a button down, and I was like, I set it up way early. I was like, fuck, it's like 30 minutes. I was like, it's hot up here.

Yeah, the callback. Yeah, and then like 10 minutes after that, I was like, damn, it's so fucking hot. How you guys do it? And then I was like, do you guys mind if I take this off? I have a shirt underneath, and they're like, yeah. And I was like, okay. And I pulled it off, and I, it was an eruption.

Eruption that I was wearing one of their fucking Facebook shirts. Yeah, it was full. Was it full? It was full, sold out, right? Yeah, it was full. Yeah, because I set you up over there. You set me up, it was great.

To do comedy. It was great, there's a scene, I guess. I did the old bait and switch. They've been asking me to go. They love you there. For years, they was asking me to go for years, and I never went, and you were out there, and I was like.

I was already there. I was like, what if I get you Ari Shaffir? And they were like, yeah, we'd be into that. You telling me you're gonna get us a way bigger name? Yeah, we'd be into that. Yeah, I was like, no, I don't know. It's too late, I'm already here. Yeah, and they set it up and they said it's sold out

within like minutes. Yeah, also I lost my Instagram right then. Oh, you didn't have your Instagram? So he was like, I was like, yeah, tell him I can't promote it even. It's four days out and I can't promote it. And they were like, no problem. Yeah, I was like, yeah, tell him I can't promote it even. It's four days out and I can't promote it. I have no way of. And they were like, no problem.

They were like, no problem. And they wanted to add more. They added a show, they wanted more. You didn't want to do more. I didn't want to be anywhere. I was just, they were happy to be there on vacation. Yeah, they were like, oh, we'll sell out everything we add. Yeah, they'll love you there.

They already loved you. All those comics love you there. They have a big desire for, I mean, they watch Netflix. That's the thing. Netflix changed the country. That's why stand-up started over there, because of Netflix. Who's their big stand-up there? Carlos Sanchez.

Oh yeah, I met him. He's a nice guy. Yeah, he came to my special tape in Brooklyn. He flew out. No, really? Yeah. That's cool. Yeah, and he's doing it in English.

He speaks English perfectly now. Yeah, he's doing stand-up in English now? Yeah, yeah. We're gonna do some dates, I believe, together. He must travel all over Latin America, though. Yeah. I mean, he's like the biggest act. I kept telling him when I was introducing him,

because he came to the special, and then he came to the after party. And I was introducing him to people. I was like, this is Carlos Santos. After party. You're so black. After party. Yeah, go ahead.

I'm so black. Look how you smell trippin'. That's an homage. No, jeez. Yeah, he came. I'm so black, look how you smell trippin'. That's an homage. No, jeez. Yeah, he came to the after party, I was like, oh, this is George Carlin of the Dominican Republic, because he really is,

because he's revolutionized the way they do stand-up. He started it there, right? No, I mean, there was stand-ups, but they weren't, it was very slapstick humor. Who's the guy with the hat that's all over Latin America? Cuntyn Fluss? I think it's Canteen Fluss. Yeah, he was the biggest one.

He was more of a, he would be more of a sketch. TV, yeah. Yeah, guy. But he- He's still on shirts everywhere. Yeah, he's huge, I mean, yeah. Like you see him in like, Wintersburg with like a white guy from Minnesota

wearing a Canteen Fluss shirt. Yeah, he just crossed over after his death. Yeah, for sure. It's like hee haw. He's huge, yeah. Yeah, it's like really slapsticky. Right, I mean, but there's still like, that was like a scene for so long,

and then these younger generation came up of like these educated Dominicans who were like, grew up with a more, you know, a little more privileged than like, say my parents or my grandparents grew up, and they were just like, oh, this is not, this type of humor is like not, it's kind of humorous. Good.

Yeah, this is like outdated a little bit. He's wearing a dress. Right, oh, this is not, this type of humor is like not, it's kind of humorous. Yeah, this is like outdated a little bit. He's wearing a dress. Right, right, right. It's like Bad Bunny now wears dresses all the time. He came out in a dress. So he was the first one to be like, this is like smart humor and political humor and pop. I'm sure there was people before him,

but he was the first one like to pop mainstream. Carlos. Yeah. To pop mainstream. Didn't he like just just make his own venues where a church or a hospital, if you have a big room, cool, let's do it there. Yeah, in fact, he was doing that in the United States because when I met him, I talked to him,

and where he was touring, when he would come to the States, was these off-courtesy venues where I was like, dude, you shouldn't be doing this. I'll introduce you to some people. You should be doing legitimate theaters or like, you know. Dude, the Latin comics always just made, figured out how to make money. Yeah.

I mean, same thing with like the urban, like the Chitlins. Not as much. When I started in LA, it was the fucking Mexican comics that were like, oh no, we'll try. It was 75 bucks at that show. They get paid right away. Like six months in, they're like, I'm getting paid.

Yeah, but I feel like a lot of like the urban comics do that here because- They're paid right away. Yeah, like they don't wanna start, like they don't do, they're like, I'm getting paid. Yeah, but I feel like a lot of the urban comics do that here. Get paid right away. Yeah, like they don't want to start, like, they don't do it when you was like, oh, why they don't do the mainstream club? And they're like, because you telling me I have to wait around for three years? I love those bills they put up where it's like,

Warney Zap. There's like 10 guys you've never heard of with weird names. I'm on one of those for this weekend. I get booked and then I show up and it's like, this is not like, they did not know what they were getting. I do this, because they're not like the nicest people a lot of times, there's like a lot of bravado in it because they feel like it's like hip hop.

Yeah, yeah, it's too much bravado. But it's like, this is not that, like most comedians in the scene are like cool with each other, like you don't introduce it, like they'll introduce you to the host, your headline, they'll introduce you like, What? Like disrespectfully. Like they won't even it like they'll introduce you the host your headline. They'll introduce you like what like disrespectfully like they won't even Like this next guy I guess he's funny. Yeah

Together dude, I just got that at Caroline's I had to feel like for like a urban act and and Introduced and I'm like nice to everyone. It was like this next guy I've never seen his stuff, but he's here, so I'm sure he's probably good. Give it up for Ian, no last name, no credits, nothing. And then, this happened to me before too, doing the Urban Show. You'll go your headline, and then the host will feel like, when he went up, the crowd wasn't ready,

so after your headline, they'll try to do like, the next 20 minutes after you. It's nuts how different the scene is. It's so different. Here's my intro in Atlanta, Ms. Pac got me a spot in Atlanta. I was there for like a week or two for something. And she nuts how different the scene is. It's so different. Here's my intro in Atlanta. Miss Pat got me a spot in Atlanta. I was there for like a week or two for something. And she was like, yeah, sure.

First of all, I got there at eight when it said, no one even unlocked the door until 8 45. Yeah, yeah. And then the show started like 9 30. Yeah. And, hey, Miss Pat sent me, okay, cool. Waited around for about an hour or whatever. And then at some point he goes,

y'all, welcome, Jeff Smith from St. Louis. That was you? And I was just like, yeah, and he's like, okay. Like, oh, I'm Jeff Smith from St. Louis, like, all right. How'd you do, how'd you do? Bombs. Horrible bombs. And my manager was there.

Yeah? It was all black crowd? Yeah, it was bad, dude. You just ate it. Yeah, I'm remembering it now, and a wave of negative emotions washing over me. It was was bad. You just ate it. Yeah, I'm remembering it now and I'm a wave of a negative emotion is washing over me They don't really they don't they don't really they don't really enjoy sarcasm. Yeah, I couldn't even get him started Yeah, they don't really enjoy sarcasm. So if you say anything, that's like remotely like gay or weird

They're like this guy's a gay weirdo Who's that short guy from the stand from Miami? He's Spanish too. Oh. But white Spanish. He hosts a lot. Oh, he does. Marcelo, Marcelo.

Marcelo, yeah. The guy, yeah, Marcelo. He said Miami, like the Latins in Miami, they're like, they don't, they're literal. Their whole lives are literal. Literal, yeah. So if you're like, so they were complaining to Big J about me,

like he wants school shootings? And he's like, no, he doesn't really mean that. Right. He if you're like, so they were complaining to Big J about me, like, he wants school shootings? And he's like, no, he doesn't really mean that. He said it. Yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Same thing. It's like everything is literal. He must be a gay weirdo.

Dude, everything is literal. Like you can't, you can't, they don't fuck with sarcasm. But to go back, the scene in DR, they're doing the opposite of it, where it's very encouraging, they're showing love, which is the right way to start a scene. You all grow together. Yeah, for that guy to come out, it was like, that's really nice of you, man.

Yeah, he's the nicest. I didn't know him at all. Way richer than me. Right, right, I didn't know him at all. I didn't know him at all. I did a radio interview over there a couple years ago, and they asked me who I, and I had seen him before I started to stand up here. So I'm, just like yeah, I've seen Carlos Sanchez and stuff is really good

It's very smart like brainy shit. I want to see him. Yeah, it's very very like smart brainy political shit Which you speak fluent, right? Yeah, so you can understand if you go to a show Yeah, I understand it completely. I went to a Spanish show in Medellin once Yeah, and I couldn't understand about just trying to follow along a little and yes interesting to see like this guy's way better than the rest Well, yes guys must along a little. And it was interesting to see like, oh, this guy's way better than the rest of them. This guy must be a pro. Yeah. And then you'd be like, I think he's shitting on his mom.

Yeah, yeah. Telling her to get up or something. You could like pick out little things, but you like, you can see technique. Well, that's the thing with a new scene where you see it like most in the new scene where it's like you get started, you find a venue, you got to get started, and then it starts, but then it has to evolve where it just is like When it gets started, it's like a big build-up. Uh-huh for like it's like a one-minute build-up for like a medium payoff Oh my god, they did that so much in the DR. Yeah, that really is It's not everybody but the ones that were making mistakes like dude, just get to it

That's just where that's where they you know, that's that's not shitting on them It's where they are. That's where we were like when we started. And the whole scene is like that. Yeah, when we started in America, we were there. Like, but it evolved where you see comedians, it's like, no, the laughter, it has to be every first, you know, four 30 seconds, then every 15, so you gotta produce a laugh. You can't hold them for this long.

But that's how they do their sketches too. Like when you watch their sketch shows, it'll be a three minute sketch and it won't be a laugh until the payoff. Damn. Like and the payoff will be like he's really a woman. You're like alright this is like early SNL shit you know like yeah not even but but they're evolving so the scene is like they're doing the thing. It's nice, it's new. It's like there was a Star Trek movie where they made planets there was this gun that made planets.

Yeah. And you just did the birth of a fucking... And you're like, in about a million years, that'll be a life form in like regular society. Yeah, yeah. You're seeing that now. That's the same thing. That same thing. I remember a lot of them, they flew out

when I was in LA doing the Netflix Comedy Festival. They flew out. No, really? Like to watch the shows or whatever. And we sat down. I was talking to a lot of them. I like that. And I was like, yo, it's crazy. Like you guys are like the pioneers.

Yeah. Like you won't even reap the benefits of the shit you're doing. Those guys, yeah. Yeah, like it's the people that come behind you that are gonna be huge and blow up. Because for so long, I mean, the Mexicans in LA, they had the Latino scene on Smash. They'll lay the foundation down,

and then it's like now you can get paid, you know, like up from there. Right, right, when you think about Latino comedy, it was Mexican, that's it, in America, that's it, really. They had it on Smash. Oh wow, yeah, you guys were always in the shadow of that They I mean we were not even sure we weren't even a thing right we weren't even to be mentioned Um, and they did great. I mean these guys were killers and absolutely Monsters that were they were Latino comedy, dude

It's so cool going on the road and like meeting the people who started at the REL jar in Iceland Yeah, like him and his buddies were like, let's so cool going on the road and meeting the people who started it. It's the Ariel Jarn in Iceland. Yeah. Him and his buddies were like, let's do a stand-up. Let's do a stand-up show. And it's good. And there was none. And then five years later, they're all in homes. Yeah?

It's like, they're the scene. And they decided it. Oh, so they do all these corporate gigs there. And it's like, well, how long should they be? So it's like, it's brand new scene. Yeah. And he's like, it's 10 minutes. Yeah, that's what it is.

That's what it is. I can do five a day and make all the corporate men then leave. And that's what they expect now. We were dumb. We said an hour. Right, right. That was dumb.

But I think we're pulling away from that now, because everybody's hour special. You're like, this is 40 minutes. I meant for corporate gigs, but yeah. This is 40 minutes. Which I'm four. I'm pro there. Now, if you do like 105, you'd be like, that was too long.

Oh, mine is so long. That was too long. Yeah. But yours was one man show, which is different. I can keep it quiet on that. Well, that's the thing in DR2 where it's like, the guys are like a year in, and they're like on their third hour. And it's like, you're doing one man shows.

Yeah. Wait, wait, let's talk more about DR in general. Yeah. But because, yeah, let's not get caught up on stand-up too much, even though it is very interesting. Hi guys, Tori Schaffir, breaking into today's podcast, tell you about an exciting adventure for a trip for yourselves, mushrooms. That's right, this year, Shroomfest falls

on July 20th, 21st, and 22nd. If you don't know what Shroomfest is, whoa, you're about to change your life. It's a holiday for mushrooms. I didn't invent it. Mushrooms told me about it over 15 years ago. And then we started an international festival where people all over the world

take mushrooms at the same time. We meet up on another plane of existence, the mushroom plane, July 20th, 21st, and 22nd this year. Every year, it goes by the longest weekend of moonlight in the summer months in the northern hemisphere. And this year, July 20th, 21st, and 22nd. The deal is, you take them once. That's fine. July 20th. But maybe you've got plans on July 20th. That's a Saturday. Well, July 21st is your friend. Oh, but that you're coming home from your

wedding July 21st. Don't worry, we gotcha. July 22nd. One of those three days, take mushrooms and participate. Shroomfest. I've done it I think 13 years running now. People have all done it in Iceland, Ireland, Israel, in Afghanistan. All the I's and everything else too. Legitimately. Mexico, Colombia, all over the world. England, everywhere. Take mushrooms. This year, as in many other years except last year, I have a friend who designed a t-shirt to commemorate the event. Shroomfest shirts. Abra Kedavra on Instagram. I'm not taking any profits on this, I just think it's a cool thing to do. I don't know, say you were part of it. Shroomfest, he's got a great new design, Abra Kedavra. He's given a portion of the proceeds to

MAPS, Multidisciplinary Association of Psychedelic Studies. It's a cool shirt. Show it. Yeah, isn't that cool? That's a cool fucking shirt. Be a part of it right now. You can get it on my website, AriShafeer.com. You can also get a copy of my vinyl for Jew. It's gonna be shipping out in July. If you order the Shroomfest shirts, you will get them by July 18th. I think they're all shipping out, I think on July 12th.

So you can wear them for the event, if you want. I say don't call attention to yourself by wearing something that says Shroomfest on it, and have a bunch of people just staring at you, unless you're doing it at a party by yourselves, and then fucking, for sure, everybody wear one. Get one of each color. I think there's three different colors. Purple, green and

gray. And that's it. That's all I had to promote everybody. I really got nothing else. Subscribe to this podcast wherever you're doing. I would like to tell you about Ian Lahr's dates. Yeah he's a comedian. He's a very funny stand-up comedian from New York City and he's gonna be visiting the following cities Nashville, Chicago, Milwaukee, West Nyack, Tampa, Washington DC at the famed Washington DC improv, Sacramento and Tempe. All tickets are available at ianlaralive.com that's I-A-N-L-A-R-A. Yeah, he spells Laura wrong. Guys, that's it. As always, leave in the comments any Anybody you think should be a great guests with a great story for this podcast

I've already taken your suggestions if you're watching on YouTube taking your suggestions I've gotten Hamilton Morris on he's coming a bunch of other people I only say Hamilton Marsh because of Shroomfest happy Shroomfest everybody. I hope you have a great time now Let's get back to the episode about Dominican Republic What a fucking blast that place was. I really gotta go back. I really gotta go back All right, enjoy let's talk about what should we talk about the food? Yeah, the baseball games by whatever I'll save it. Go ahead. The food was amazing. The food's amazing. Yeah, what's the best? It depends who you are.

I'm asking you. I'm still, I gotta get away from this, but I love fried food too much. It's like not good though. It's not good. So the chicharron. That's my favorite. And they do it right. They do it like in, how far is it from Colombia?

They do it the way Colombia does it. The crispy little pieces. Yeah, that's not good. Ecuador does it different. A lot of places do it different. Their chicharron is the best. You it, the crispy little pieces. Yeah, that's not good. Ecuador does it different. Lots of places do it different. Their chicharron is the best. You was having a pork one or chicken? Pork.

Pork is like the worst kind. It's like literally fried pork fat. No, I'm saying for you, health-wise, health-wise. Oh yeah, no. I felt murmurs. Yeah, you felt, yeah. I felt murmurs. Your heart feels like it's struggling.

Like a bubble or something was passing through me. Yeah, but I love, I love, and then I love then I love the tostones, which is the platanos. The plantains are fried up. That shit is like. And it's not sweet. No. You could do the sweet one. You could do the sweet one.

What do they call them? The sweet ones. Not marron. The yellow plants are free. The maduros, yeah. You could do the sweet one, which is great. That's more deserty. And you went to a ****, right?

In Gascoway? Shout out to ****. That's what a dope restaurant over there. Dude, you were like, hey, this is the spot to go to. You want like home cooking-ish kind of shit, whatever. And I was like, oh, I'm a seven minute walk from there. Yeah, you went every day? I went four times.

Dude, I, when I'm over there. I went four times in five days. I do a feast, dude. Like I literally get a back table and I'm like, I want everything. Like I have to get carried out of there. Like I feel so bad when I'm leaving. But the food is so good. It's so good. And you see it's this buffet and you'm like, I want everything. Like, I have to get carried out of there. Like, I feel so bad when I'm leaving, but the food is so good. It's so good. And you see it's this buffet,

and you're like, what the fuck? I got lucky. You was doing buffet? You was eating off the buffet? No, you pointed that. No, I know, because you could do buffet, but then there's like the menu, too. Because I do the menu. You just go order? Yeah, I do the menu, too. What do you mean? Like, there's a menu. You can sit at the table, you get a menu that they don't have,

food they don't have there. You can order whatever you want Yeah, this is just a food They have there for the day for like the workers or whatever then you get a menu you can order like whatever you want What's not on that menu? Whatever? I mean stuff that's not there that you have a 20. I know but that's just like the To-go that's like the to-go stuff like the daily stuff, but like I would like like I like like a whole fish or something Yeah, yeah, like that would be on the menu. I like I would like, I like- Like a whole fish or something. You get something like that. Yeah, yeah, like that would be on the menu. I like grilled chicken breast, which is Betuga La Plancha.

That's not on the thing. That's not on. You have to order that, yeah. Where was that advice, tour guide? You have to, but you're having such a good time. I feel like I didn't want to overwhelm you. Dude, I went there, I wrote way too much every time. I was like, at some point you realize,

it's not very expensive. No, I mean, $20, you'll eat like a god. A god. Yeah. And so at some point you're like, well let me just try this. Yeah, I mean, $20, you'll eat like a god. A god. Yeah. And so at some point, you're like, well, let me just try this. Yeah. I will just throw it out.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you get empanadas. I love empanadas and other fried stuff. Fries are good to go shit. Yeah, they call them patelitos in DR or empanadas, whatever. Those are amazing. I get a milk.

Do you get a milkshake? Well, they call them moris soñando. What is that? It's like the DR milkshake, but it's make it's made with like condensed milk and orange juice Oh, no, but it's great so much sugar You gave me a bunch of shit to ask for and I would just go ahead and ask for it And it would be like the best yeah, yeah That's like a that's like if you want to get your fried food get your sugar high

What was else was good the cheese around? You get pernil I Got pernil you talking about thatnil, you told me about that. That was great. I did not love their bologna. What's that? Mofongo. Oh, you didn't like their Mofongo. There's actually a place across that if you wanted

Mofongo, I would have told you to go to Adrián Tropical which is a restaurant that's right on the water. They make Mofongo. I feel like I passed by there and maybe tried to get it but it was closed or maybe, that's like we're gonna get it there It's like right on the water right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they're like you gotta cross the road together Yeah, there's a river. There's like a road like a ring road. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. Yeah, that's the malecon. That's the malecon Yeah, it's a malecon. Yeah, which is known for like the great street street food there in there

Yeah, no malecon downón. Down which way? Towards like? It runs like two miles, three miles. Somebody told me not to go there because they said, it's a little like, you don't wanna go, I was telling them about a cigar shop I was going to walk to early on. Oh, that's the other thing you told me.

Yeah. I was like, can you get a Cuban cigar there? Yeah. And you were like, oh, yeah, I guess. Yeah. You don't even know what you're walking into. Yeah, yeah. Dude, it's even know what you're walking into. Yeah, yeah. They make Dominicans.

People go to the Dominican Republic for that reason. For the Dominicans, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, apparently- I got so many, dude. The Cuban, the Dominicans? I smoke two a day. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm going on Monday.

I'm going to get like a whole thing. You get the fresh road, and the humidity keeps some things so you don't have to like, they don't go bad. Two a day, you sit, nobody cares if you sit there, nobody cares if you drink rum in the morning in your coffee. No, nobody cares. And anytime you're out. It's encouraged.

So I went, yeah. What a, is two cigars a day bad for you? Yeah, it's a lot. Every day, not in a day, every day, two cigars a day. Yeah. I bet those people do three or four, huh? Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I mean, I've been like, I went on the road with like, cause I'm thinking, cause I try not to like small, I like cigars, but I I bet those people do three or four, huh? Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I mean, I've been, like, I went on the road with, like,

because I'm thinking, because I try not to, like, smoke. I like cigars, but I try not to, like, overindulge. But then, like, I was, I remember I did, like, a ruba with, like, Bobby Kelly and, like, Tony V. And I'm like, you guys are smoking four a day. Like, is this healthy? Should I be doing this? No, it's not healthy.

No, absolutely not. All right, I didn't know. It was a vacation for two a day. OK, all right. No, one a day is a lot, but also you're in dr But it's like you go to like a TGI Friday and you're like young astray and like uh-huh. Yeah It's not is it addicting a cigars addicting I don't know the process and when you're getting great great ones yeah fresh ones and shit

You can't really find anywhere. Yeah, a culture that doesn't care if you smell like cigar smoke. Yeah, it was great Yeah, well apparently it's about the way DR got so good is they Cuba was the world place of cigars. And yeah, but because of the embargo with the American, they took some of a lot of like the plants to the DR and just planted. And it's like similar like. Yeah. So it's similar.

So now like a Cuban is not. No, it's not the best. No, it's just kind of rare. It's the great. It's like the top thing, but it's like there's other top things. Right. It's like good tequila,

like there's a bunch of good tequilas. Dude, I came home with so much. You did? Oh yeah. You shoulda fucking shoulda brought me one. I did. You didn't give me a cigar. I just didn't give it to you

because it was for this podcast. I'm just sharing. What I do mean is, I do have plenty left over and I will give you one. Oh really? I'd like to smoke one with you. Nice, yeah for sure. We should smoke one now.

We should, how about right after this, if you'd like to go? I have a deck upstairs. All right, yeah, yeah, for sure. Hell yes. Yeah, for sure. We should walk on now. We should. How about right after this? If you want to go. I have a deck upstairs. All right. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Oh, yes. Yeah, for sure. Let's do it. Man, I was one of the special special ones. I was excited to do it. You were. This was so like I asked Chris, I was like, hey, who's any comics been to D.R.? And he was like, yeah, I think it goes a lot.

I was like, do you ever go? Yeah, I've been there. Yeah, dude, I mean, I was going. I was fucking helpful, bro. Dude, I mean, I was going I was going five, six times. You were so fucking helpful, bro. Dude, I mean, I was going five, six times a year. Like, I was before the pandemic. I haven't been to, this is my first time since the pandemic. But yeah, I was there. I was there.

How good is the, I mean, I kind of want to get back into baseball, you know the power went out when I was there? So I went to the- You mean, do I know the power? Of course the power went out when you was there. That's like the norm, yeah. Oh. You thought that was a power outage? Yeah. No, that's just what happens. What do you mean? Well, they shut down, the power went out when he was there. That's like the norm. Yeah What do you mean they shut down the power goes out it just just happens well the power company shuts down shuts down the power sometimes

Dude, who's in a game? It was like I was like looking down for a minute you get you can get rum at the fucking stadium Put it over ice. Yeah, just in a glass. Oh, it's great. It's so fucking great. And the power, I'm like oh, 7th inning stretch, and I'm like, it's middle of the eighth. And then the first thing to come back on was the sound system, before the lights, and everyone just starts dancing. Yeah, it's just, I mean, you can't even compare because it's such a party love culture.

So it's like, you put them in a sporting event and it's just insane, dude, you're if you if you are available and free I want you to come to like one of the world baseball classic games yeah so you can see that that and there they play him down there they play Miami this year in Miami in Miami yeah yeah it is like like it is an experience if I don't go back to Ecuador let's go down there weekday yeah Yeah, for sure. On a weekday or two or something like that. Yeah, I'll definitely be down there.

So, we can definitely do it. It's like- God, they love baseball. So, also, the game started an hour and a half late. It's like I got there to scalp a ticket. For no reason. The doors aren't even open. Eventually I'm like, this line's not fucking moving. And eventually I was like, fuck it,

I'll just pay like $25 for front row tickets. See, what's good about the way you travel is you don't have, line's not fucking moving. And eventually I was like, fuck it, I'll just pay like $25 for front row tickets. See what's good about the way you travel is you don't have, cause to be honest, and it's not just like you, somebody like you, like if I would just, like the people, when I told the comedy club people that you were there, they were like, is he out of his mind? Like he doesn't need to do this. Like we can just, like he's our, like we can just get him in the front. Like you could just show up and sit in the front row of the show. Like you don't have to like this. We can just, like, he's our, we can just get him in the front,

you can just show up and sit in the front row of the show. You don't have to like, wait in line. Of the bass, you'll say? Yeah, you don't have to wait in line. You don't have to do that stuff, but you're like, nah, I'm cool, I'd rather do it. I'll find it. Yeah, it was interesting. Yeah, no, but they're big on hospitality.

And then also they want you to enjoy yourself. They wanna show you the good parts of the art. I know, but here's how to... So two types of people. Some definitely like, sure, get me in front row. Come get me to walk around and see stuff. But there's another type that just wants you to guide me to the right place. A people travel?

Yeah. So it's like, oh, head to the old town. It's touristy, but not too touristy. And it's a good restaurant. Oh, you went to where it looks like Spain. Yeah. La Zona Colonial And it's a good restaurant. Yeah, where it looks like Spain. Yeah. Yeah, La Zona Colonial.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. La Zona Colonial. That was the first place Christopher Columbus stopped. No. Yeah, and when he came to the Americas, that was literally where he stopped. Oh damn. Yeah. Dude, I went three times, I didn't know that.

You didn't know that? No. You didn't wonder why it looked like Spain? I just thought they took over. They have that in Ecuador too. Yeah? Yeah, but it was... But that happened there too.

Well, yeah, the Colon colonial, but not Columbus. Oh, oh. Just Spanish at some point got through to Ecuador. Yeah, that's the first place he stopped. That looks, I mean, Sonacolonia looks like Spain completely. It does, it's nice looking. The architecture's hundreds of years old. I went to one place there that I liked.

It's fine, it's just a little touristy. It's become that, yeah. Yeah. But it's interesting touristy because- A couple blocks off though, you're fine. What, what? Yeah. It's touristy, but it's just a little touristy. It's become that, yeah. But it's interesting touristy because- A couple blocks off though you're fine. It's touristy but it's also like, it's still a poor neighborhood for like, on some blocks which is weird.

But they've turned it into cafes and shit now. But you can be in line for a juice selling behind like two Latin people and then you. It's not like only for tourists. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Latin people you mean Dominicans? Yeah. I mean I'm guessing, I don not like only for tourists. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Latin people, you mean Dominicans? Yeah. I mean, I'm guessing, I don't know, speaking Spanish.

Yeah, yeah. And then being like dark, I don't know. Yeah, I mean, like sort of. Right, right, right. I can't be sure. Today's episode of UB Trippin' is brought to you by Tacovus Boots. Guys, you know who I am, right?

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Okay, tell me about that. They're like, I mean, their whole thing is like, they're not the city. I mean, it's like, it would be like New York and like kind of how Texas is, where like they take pride in being like, we're not that. We're not that. This is like, real.

Did they have baseball there? Of course. They did. Of course. They have Las Aguilas there. Those are the two biggest teams. That's Metz and, that would be like Metz and, that would be like Yankees, Boston, really. Las Aguilas, they're good too. And like, all the North players,

the players from the North, they play up there. I almost went to an Aguilas game. That's like, that's like top. Yeah, I think they were playing either Escondido or, or what is this? If they play Lice, Aguilas is the biggest rivalry on the island. No, really?

The biggest rivalry on the island. But Escogego, Escogego? Escogego. Escogego, sorry? They're capital too. And Lice, share the stadium. Same, yeah, same town. So it's like they'll have their own like wall of fame.

It would be like Mexican Yankees because New York, the city that sets up the... It'd be like Giants Jets. Yeah, I mean, yeah. They literally share the stadium. Same, yeah, same town. So it's like they'll have their own like wall of fame. It would be like Mexican Yankees because New York, the city, the San Tulemingo. It'd be like Giants Jets. Yeah, I mean. They literally share the stadium. And they're the only teams in town, yeah. Yeah, cause San Tulemingo is the big city,

so they have two teams. Yeah. Okay, tell me more about the North. Oh yeah, so the North. That's so much I wanna get into with this one, fuck. The North is like, that's what they call the campo, which is like, the campo would be, I guess the farm, but it's like the country farm. I don't know what the real translation for the word. Because campesino is like, what is

that? Is that a guy from that place? Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's, it's, it would be like a farmer, I guess, a campesino, but not a farm in the traditional sense of the way you see it here. Although they do have, though they have cows and chickens and all that, but you just eat, I mean, their food is really- Is that a campesino like one of those Mexican country stars? Don't they call those campesinos? It could be, they could be a campesino too. But that's like a farmer though, right? That would just be like an American farmer.

I know this is probably sounding great, but they have a whole thing. I'm ignorant of it. I'm okay with that. I know, but I shouldn't be. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. But I know it in Spanish. I know a campesino in Spanish,

but my grandfather, my parents, they were all born in a campo, which is basically a farm where you have the mango trees, the avocado trees, you have chickens, cows over there, so that's like the countryside. If you thought the capital, I mean over there, and of course everything has advanced a ton. Yeah. But they still have sections where, where they don't have bathrooms.

They'll have like a letrina, an outhouse. Oh, really? I've been to those in DR, too. You stayed in those places? No, I've never stayed in there, but I've been to, I've been to places that have those. You can't drive from Santo Domingo to the top, can you? You can drive throughout the whole country, of course, yeah. I mean, how long is the drive?

The drive from the capital to Santiago is about two, three hours. The capital is the northern one, right? The capital is on the bottom. That's center. That's not to Domingo Santiago Yeah, okay. It's how long two or three hours about two three. Yeah, that's like a new road You could do it in like you do like 90 minutes Oh, that's not okay, and then to support the plot that will probably be the furthest drive And that'll be like four or five hours put the color from Puerto Plata. What's the plot? That's the northern tourist place Okay, when the con's on the south. Yeah, that was the other thing I didn't know.

As soon as I asked, I was like, I'm like, oh, there's five different places it flies to. Yeah. And I'm like, where am I supposed to fly? Yeah, there's Puerto Plata, there's Santiago, there's Santo Domingo, there's La Romana, and there's Punta Cana. Damn.

There's five places. The La Romana one is not that big, but all the other ones, yeah. What do people do in the North? What's the vibe difference? The vibe, I mean, it's just, it's like, same thing as New York City versus what they would do in the South.

So it's like, you go to out in New York City, it's like the city people, where everybody's like, dressed like city people, and they're dressed like, Santo Domingo, they're like, don't wear shorts. Yeah, that's like the thing. Is that like a thing? I'm glad I read that beforehand. In the, they were like, don't wear shorts. Yeah, that's like the thing. Is that like a thing? I've read that beforehand. In the North, it would be like...

I wore pants. Wear shorts. Oh, really? We wear shorts and slippers. Yeah, it's the countryside. And of course, they have this, there's major cities, like the South has major cities here, you know? Like the South still has like Atlanta,

which would be like New York. But it's a Southern version of a major city. As opposed to like Boston and Philadelphia and New York, there's like a Northern version of a city. Right, yeah, so is that. So up there, up there, then more. And I love them both, because it depends on what you want.

Like sometimes I'm in the mood for a more city thing. You know, I wanna be in D.R., but I wanna feel like I'm at home. But then sometimes, like, nah, I wanna go to the country. I wanna go to the country parties, get the home cooking. Really? Yeah, yeah. Is the food different up there? It's the same food, but the seasoning ways is different.

Some food you eat and you're like, oh, that's how they make it in the north versus the south. That's how Ecuador was too. It's the same food. Different regions make it a little different. A little different, yeah. But it's the same.

Thailand too is like that. It's the same food, but yeah. Yeah. But there's a lot of, I mean, every, the country is, we're a prideful country, so the country has like a lot of pride, but then like regionally there's a lot of pride. So there's always like the thing of like the North

versus the South, like the city boys versus the country boys. Oh really? Yeah, just like that. Yeah, and in the South, in the center of the middle, we tend to be darker like me, versus in the North they tend to be lighter. Like me.

Yeah, like you, just like you, yeah. to be lighter. Like me. Yeah, just like you. There's a big range there. Yeah, yeah. Of like, or here too with the Dominicans. There's a huge range. Why are there so many Dominicans here? In New York? Yeah.

I think after Trujillo, which is a famous dictator in the country, I think after his reign a lot of people fled. Shout out to Trujillo. A lot of people fled to New York. Why New York? Where we started. I'm not sure why New York, I'm not sure. I know why the Mexicans go to LA,

it's like, you can walk there. Yeah. But like, why, yeah, why? Why New York City? But I mean, does anyone need a reason? I mean, everyone's in New York City, right? No, but there's a big population of Dominicans that come, it's like they're all here in New York.

I know, but I'm saying there was also a big population of Italians, there was a big population I'm saying there was also a big population of Italians. There was a big population of Jewish people. There's a big population of Irish. Like, I feel like everyone was coming here. Yeah, good point. Good point. But there are also Italians in L.A. Yeah, but Dominicans is too far. It's too far.

It's too far. Yeah. They're getting there now, but it's too far. And also and also the Mexicans had it on lock over there. Yeah, yeah. Like, that's just dumb. Like, that's just dumb. That's just dumb. And they're like, I mean, I'm like you. So when I go to a place, I like to immerse myself in the culture.

When you're in LA, you can't help but be Mexican. You're just like, yeah. I thought it was racist when I got there. He's a Mexican guy. I was like, no, you can't say that. It's like saying Oriental. Yeah, yeah. You're like, what the fuck?

And then they were like, they are. They're all Mexican. And you're like, no. And I remember being in LA, that was the first time I saw a real Mexican gangster. I was doing a taping, and one of the comics, he was Mexican, and he had a crew. And the crew came, and it was Mexican face tattoos.

And I'm like, this is the people I see in movies. I've never seen one like this in person. Mexican gangster. They had it on lock. But it's the same thing. Like the way Mexicans did Los Angeles, Dominicans did New York. Did New York, took it over.

Yeah. What are the chicks like in DR? Oh, I mean, the women, in my opinion, some of the most beautiful, I mean. It's interesting. Beautiful women. It's interesting. Ever. Yeah.

Sex tourism is big over there. Lot of hookers. Yeah. Oh, that's what I got advice I was gonna say. The advice I want, I was like, hey, I'm gonna go to this cigar store. The advice I wanted was like, hey, I'm going to go to this cigar store. And they go, uh, don't walk there.

Take an Uber. And I was like, why? Because it's right by the Malecón at night. Oh, at Malecón at night. Yeah. And I was like, it's dangerous. Like, it's, and they didn't say anything. And then as it was going, like, it wouldn't say specifically.

They're like, it's just better not to. There's stuff there. Yeah. That's the thing where it's like. But I was walking there, and then some trans hooker was like, hey, what's up? You want to party? I was like, no. I was like, oh, that's what you meant it's like, but I was walking there and then some trans hooker was like, hey, what's up, you wanna party? I was like, no, I was like, oh, that's what you meant. There's stuff going on.

Right, right, and her defense, you look like you wanna party. Yeah, and I'm walking alone, I'm walking alone. Of course, it's like, why else would this John be here? Yes, absolutely, absolutely. No, no, no shame on her. It wasn't on her, yeah. It was just like, you want some advice on where to go.

Like, say it out. Yeah, yeah, at night, at night over there is not great. But that's what, that's for that. It's like going to the Red Light District and being like, what's with the process? How dare you? Yeah, this is what that area is. Yeah, okay, so there's a lot of sex tourism.

I didn't even know, to be honest, I didn't even know about the sex tourism until I got older. Like, when I got older, like, cause I've been going to Dominican Republic because I was a kid, my family's from there, and we would just go for good clean family fun. And then after I got older, I started going

and I was like, oh man, there's a whole thing of men who come out here for the prostitution. Are the chicks in general, I mean, so where do you get the prostitutes there? I didn't even, I don't think I even saw them. Dude, I mean, it's gotten pretty bad depending on where you go, you just go where they're at. You know where they're at.

You can just place you go where everyone there. I mean, it'll look like a bar where everyone's having a good time, but this is like everyone here's working. In Cambodia, I noticed that. You walk into some like, and you're like, ah, which one of these places? It's a sex tourism spot. Yeah, and then I feel like, they're working. They need them. Yeah, no, no, yeah. All of them have like feel like you know it they're working they need them

You know these are a lot all of them have like there's a reason they're there You know all of them the does kind of sad I mean it is it is kind of sad, but like I've never dealt I've never been one, but I've had conversations with really smell my finger I've had conversations with them where they're like you know like I don't want to be doing this But I have a kid and you know I can't get a job and stuff. So it's like, whatever. But I feel like it, I feel like there was a time where it trickled into like, it was leaking into normal society. So I wouldn't frequent places that I knew was known for prostitution, but

then you would freak in like a regular bar and then you'd meet a regular girl who might like you. But then she would be like, Oh, give you a price, just like, just to see. Cause it's like. Dude, that's happening in New York now. Is it? Oh yeah. Oh my God. They're these like regular person, like occasional hookers.

Yeah. They're like, Hey, would you fuck my friend? Like, Oh, maybe. And they're like, for like 200 bucks. I'm like, Oh no, she's not, I don't want it that bad. Yeah. But they're like throwing it. I think they just do it once in a while.

It's like, yeah. It's like, and I think. You don't have to register for the hookers society. Yeah, you don't have it that bad. Yeah. But they're like throwing it. I think they just do it once in a while. It's like, yeah. It's like, and I think- You don't have to register for the Hookers Society. Yeah, yeah. You don't have to join the union. Yeah, there's no dues, so you can just like do it once in a while. I think they just tell themselves like-

It's wild. I like this guy. Yeah, he seems cute. I fuck him. I fuck him. See if you can get some money out of it. Yeah, yeah. So, I mean, there was a time where that was happening too much, so like at that point

like me and my friends, like we were like, we kind of was like, ah, we don't want to keep coming to this, this is like, like we were like, we kind of was like, ah, we don't want to keep coming to this. This is like, because we weren't in there for that. We kind of just wanted to hang out and meet cool people. Sure. But but yeah, that's a big thing. But like, I mean, I think does that trickle into normal? Life like like everyone I know who dates like Thai girls in Thailand, they're like, it's just Thai girls.

It's so much sex like like like like hookering, they're like, if you hold out, the guy'll just go get a hooker. It's like a bodega. Yeah, I mean, look, we're loving people, so loving people have sex. Okay, that's what I was asking. Loving people have sex, and it's hot, and everyone is like, sexy.

Everyone's sexy, they all put on some short, skimpy shit. So you know it's going to happen. But listen, I mean, I guess it happens in every society. Because I was in Tel Aviv when I went to Israel. Another episode. I was in Tel Aviv. And I was like, Jesus, these people are horny. These people are horny.

You're welcome. You feel the horniness early in the morning. I'm like, why are you dressed like this for breakfast? Dude, New York's like that. My first time here, I was like, ah are you dressed like this for breakfast? Dude, New York's like that. My first summer here, I was like, oh my God, I haven't shown off everything. That's me in Tel Aviv, yeah. And everyone's so hot, so I feel like

it's the same type of thing. And it's like a beach, anytime there's a beach, you know, it's gonna be that. But I mean, Dominican women, I think they're the best. They're so hot. Are they nice? I was was alone, so I didn't really go out, out. You told me one place to go out. They're so loving and they're all, they're so loving and they're like all like motherly, like they're like, they were just raised to be like motherly and then they're like so self-sufficient and they cook, they can cook you a meal and they're like, yeah, I think

it's, I think it's great. Um, yeah. And they're like, yeah, I think it's great. Yeah. Get to know yourself and your roots better in 2024 with AncestryDNA. Want to know where your family comes from in northern France? Maybe you'd like to see how your genes influence certain traits like diet, fitness, and allergies. There's so much of you and your heritage to discover. Visit Ancestry.ca and get started with an Ancestry DNA Kit today. Meet our summer collection of grillable faves that come on sticks, in spirals with bite-size

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What are you now, 45? We would go, yeah. I just turned 32, I'm still a young boy. But I don't wanna- 32 and already a special on HBO. Yeah. Called Romantic, Comedically Romantic Comedy.

Romantic Comedy. Yeah, we did a play on it, you know, whatever. It's a lot of dating shit. It's like, all right, it's a hard place. I like it. Romantic Comedy. And the editor was like, this read's sexy. And I was like, all right, let's go Romantic Comedy.

Great. Then I am sexy. Yeah, all right, I guess I'm that guy. But yeah, we used to hit the clubs. We used to go clubs. Now we're more like bar people, lounge people. Yeah. We want to go smoke a cigar at a bar, outdoor bar and stuff.

That's like the scene. And eat, you just eat. You just eat. You just eat. What do you drink there when you go out? I used to do the whiskey. That used to be whiskey. I did brugel for sure for a while, the rum.

You do rum. Which is like, that's another thing. Because see, that's the thing. You go to like the Capitol and a lot of times it's like, that's another thing. Cause that's, see that's the thing. You go to like the capital and a lot of times it's like, y'all, you guys are kinda trying to be Americans here. Like, cause if I come from the United States, why am I drinking fucking, why, I gotta drink Grey Goose? Like, nah, I wanna drink Brugall.

Like, I came to DR to drink Brugall, but they're like, oh, we don't drink Brugall. It's like, cause you're trying to be Americans. But it's like, in the North, they don't have that. Like, when you go to the thing, they're like, yeah, we're drinking brugall. We get a bottle of brugall. We drink it all night.

Like, brugall's not a bad rum. It's not, dude, I never knew rum could taste that good. Yeah, brugall's a good rum. I remember rum from college, and it was like, get drunk on like Captain Morgan or something. Yeah, but if you had a nightclub in like the capital, and you order a brugall, like, they're like, who's this lame? No.

Yeah, you need to order like the American expensive drinks. So when I used to go, we used to drink a lot of Johnny Walker. We go to the whiskey. Oh, that whiskey. The whiskey's big over there. Daytime we drink Presidente, of course. Presidente. Beers.

That's what we drink all day. From morning. That's the normal like local country shit beer. We drink beer all day. Light. It's not too heavy. There's Presidente light and then you can get the heavy one. But I'm saying it's not like a thick.

It's not a Guinness. Right. No. Yeah. it's still light. You drink that all day. From morning, I mean, obviously if you're not working, but for more. But even if you work, you go have one for lunch. Oh, what about, um, what's the local drink? It's Pugal, it's Presidente.

Cocktail. Uh, well rum and coke, obviously. And the Mama Juana, but Mama Juana, you're not drinking Mama Juana every day, you know, no Mama Juana Mama Juana is a drink. I ordered at that nightclub you go into she was asking ten times She goes no and I'm like I dispelled it. Oh, no, we have that. I thought you asked for a weed That like oh you thought you're talking for my Tijuana. Yeah, cuz I'm a tourist alone way too early to go to a nightclub There's like three people in there. I'm like fuck. Oh, yeah for three hours. Yeah. Yeah you were there to go to a nightclub, there was like three people in there, I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna star for three hours.

Yeah, yeah, you went to Uffordia, right? Lasers going off, and I'm like, what, they put you in a booth? Yeah. And they're like, I'm gonna sit in here, I ordered one of those and I got the fuck out of there. You went to Uffordia, right? I love Venezuela, Uffordia, that was like, I mean, it has had a resurgence, but in the 2010s, that was the spot in the Dominican Republic.

Really? Jay-Z and Beyonce went there, Rihanna went there, that was like, if you were there, that was the spot in the Dominican Republic. Really? Jay-Z and Beyonce went there, Rihanna went there. If you were there, that was the club. Wow. And now it's coming back as a hot spot. But Mama Juana's good. Mama Juana's more like of a beach drink. So if you get it at the beach, that's the thing, too.

Did you go to Boca Chica? I went to Boca Chica. Boca Chica's great. Wait. Hey, this just hit me. We'll talk about Boca Chica. Yeah. Whatica's great. Wait. Hey, this just hit me. We'll talk about Boca Chica. Yeah. What would you say if I pause this right now

and I brought the Mama Wana shit back with me and I made some? You have some? I have not tried it yet. You have it for months? Yeah. For fermenting? And it's, wait, but is it?

It's corked. I made it two instructions. I asked everybody there, how do you make it? You did the wine. Did the wine. Pour the wine out. Brujold. And then brujold?

Yeah. OK. Brujold, a little honey. All right, so yeah, let's have a shot. Let's do it. I did the wine. Did the wine. Pour the wine out. Brugall. And then Brugall? Yeah, Brugall, a little honey. All right, so yeah, let's have a shot. Let's do it. Wait right here. All right.

Dude, I have not tried it yet. Oh, I'm so excited. Okay, okay, here. Now this is Brugall. That's Brugall. This is extra biejo Brugall. Now this is like DR, like this is like Dominican shit. Yeah, but it's good.

Yeah, like you take this, like you going to the beach, you take this with a, don't make like this, I know here you go to the beach, they'll make like a charcuterie board, or like a, you know, they'll have little snacks in the cooler, tuna fish sandwiches. You take one of these with a pot of spaghetti, go to the beach, that's what they do.

That's what they do! That's like the most- It's crazy! They just bring out this picnic with just rum. Rum, beers, and like spaghetti. Shit like that. It's not a beach food. It just soaks up sand.

But they do it, that's it. And this is the Mama Juana. That's the Mama Juana. So they said you can't get it in with- Alcohol in it. No, you need to put alcohol in it. But then you gotta claim itana. So they said you can't get it in with- Alcohol in it. No, you need to put alcohol in it. But then you gotta claim it. What do you mean you can't get it in?

If it's just the sticks, it's all these sticks, right? And whatever spices and the lease and whatever. If it's just the sticks, then you have to register because the agriculture board won't let you get in there. I've gotten them in all the time. What I did was I taped a $5 bill to this and I put it in my check bag. And I figured like, if you catch this,

you know what this is. Keep the fucking five. They didn't take it. Five was on me still. But that's the advice I got. But otherwise they say you gotta fill it up with the wine ahead of time. Or some sort of liquid.

And so then you bring it as a drink. Then it doesn't crawl off of your agriculture. Now this is a traditional Dominican mamahuana. Where you bought this, Boca Chica? Or in the capital? In the capital. In the capital. But also, I see them selling at the market with just the big jugs of wine,

filled with the sticks. Yeah, because you could get one with the sticks, and there's one with stuff from the ocean. I've seen that one too. Really? Yeah, it's like a different kind. But the stick one is the traditional one. And this is like also like an Afrodisiac.

Yeah, that's right. That's what they said. You get this, supposedly it gets you going. I mean, not supposedly, I think it's like, I think it might be factually an Afrodisiac. It could be. Should we pour? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, all right, I guess we try without ice and then try with this. Yeah, but Lenferment, I got some of this for fucking DeRosa's bar. Oh, okay. I brought two, three, yeah. So, all right, I guess we try without ice and then try with this. Yeah, but Len Ferment, I got some of this for fucking DeRosa's bar. Oh, okay. I brought two, Oh, so do they have it? three for a friend, yeah. Oh, that's- No, no, no. Yeah, I brought the sticks and I was like,

hey dude, like you should sell this. Yeah. I need Dominican, would be like, what? Yeah. Yeah, they wouldn't believe you have it. Right. And they wouldn't believe you did it right, neither. So, I mean, yeah. Oh, that smells good. It does smell good. I'm so excited about this. This is gonna bring me back. Is it a lot? How much you supposed to drink?

That's a lot. Some people drink it in shots. Some people just some people drink it chilled. But they like legend has it. Legend has it not to drink too much because you'll get too horny. We're gonna fuck each other tonight? Yeah I don't know. This is gonna be the first member of UB Trippin that fucks on podcast. Toast? Toast to the Dominican Republic and to the Sussie your special. Yeah. Dude this is good. Not bad? This is a good mamahuana. You prepared it right. Dry. You can taste, like, all the spices in it. Yeah, you prepared this right. This is good.

I shook it up a bunch. Every, like, every few days, I'd shake it up. When you have people, you just give them a shot. Give them a shot. Maybe I'll just, like, we might be drunk. Yeah, yeah, just give them, like, a nice little shot. Oh, I'm so happy. Yeah, that's prepared very well.

And you just redo it. You redo it? You just redo it. Yes, you just, as it goes down, you add a little little shot. Oh, I'm so happy. Yeah, that's prepared very well. And you just redo it. You redo it? You just redo it. Yes, as it goes down, you add a little. Yeah. Well, you wash it over again. You put the wine.

Put the wine, rinse it out. Put honey, the brugala again. You don't have to be brugala. You can use any rum. Yeah, I know. But I figured, like, why not honor the fucking country? Yeah. And you just redo it.

Redo it. Yeah, the guys, when I looked on the site, like like how to get it home and how you do it, whatever, it was like, once it's mixed the first time, it's like you can go about seven years, just like re-upping. This is so fucking Dominican. Like dude, like you want a drink with like a cigar? Like now, like, I mean, I'm only 32,

but now like that's more fun than being at the nightclub. Like everything else. Sipping on that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And like a cool setting. With a breeze, an ocean breeze coming over you. Yeah, with like good food. That's the shit.

That's the shit. You did good with that. That was good. That was good. Damn, it's got like a... Oh. It's dry, but it's like sweet also. It's like minty a little bit too.

I'd experiment with it. Yeah. You taste the honey. Yeah, bring it on Rogan when you do the thing. See how many he'll drink of those. See how many, oh. Like prepare a bottle and just have everyone doing shots. First of all.

If you did that, DR would like. They would go nuts. They would go nuts if you did that shit, dude. They were like, cause that's the thing, like DR, I learned this too,, I mean, before, like the first thing I ever did was I had a comedy central set go viral where I talk about like my parents being from the Dominican Republic and somehow it got there.

Like they just found it and like they show so much love. Like when they, especially if like it's anything like bigging them up or the country up, they're just like the most supportive, like. I mean, I loved it. People, yeah. I loved it. I was yeah. I loved it. I was so glad I chose there.

And then you helped me. I was like, this is the spot. Yeah. Yeah, you're smoking. Just this thick, kind of warm air washes over you. Yeah, the humid air. Like the beautiful people and then just like the food. And also like somebody like you, like they know you're a tourist, which is kind of helps.

And it hurts when you're negotiating, but it helps too, because the country relies on tourism. So when your country relies on tourism, you don't do crime to tourists, because that's really frowned upon. It hurts the country if the word gets out. Right, so like when a cop- I talked to Yawanos with hookers and STDs. What do you mean?

They're like, test them and get them out of here if they got anything. Oh, we don't want no STDs? Like if word gets out, you're getting a fucking herpes from a touring horse. Oh, you won't come? No one will come. Yeah. So like, get them out of here if they got anything. Oh, we don't want no one to see. Like if word gets out, you're getting a fucking herpes from a tour on horse. Oh, you won't come? No one will come. Yeah. So like, get them out.

Get a new one. Yeah, yeah. There's plenty new ones coming. Yeah, that's how it is. So like, if you were to call the cop, or if you get a cop and somebody, a local criminal did a crime to you, like the cop would be very upset. Like what the, like. Oh wow.

You know how many people are eating off the fact that this. That they're here. That they're here, right. So that's like one benefit of being in tourism. You wanna talk about Uber? Sure. Yeah, I'm gonna put one in too. Uber came into the country I think in like 2016.

It kinda changed the game. It changed the game completely to be honest. I mean, you didn't have to rent a car to get to Boca Chica, you didn't have to rent a car. No. And that's like a two hour, hour and a half. And I know the taxis are mad and shout out to the taxis over there. I know they got mad, but it's like, listen, it used to be, you used to have to pay an

American. Yeah. When you used to land in Santo Domingo to get to Boca Chica, an American, $70. What did they use it? The peso, right? The pesos, yeah. You couldn't even pay in pesos. Yeah.

$70? Dollars. And it's about a 25 minute ride. It's not that far. 30 minute ride, yeah. Uber came, changed the game, man. For one, it brought more tourism into the country because people started to feel safe. You didn't have to, right?

You started to feel safe. You could get a cab, you could get anywhere, you didn't have to rent a car. And then the Uber prices, you know, you can't compete with Uber when it's starting off in a place. Correct. New York was like, $3 to get across. Yeah, you're like, yeah. This place, this is going to be awesome. Fuck the cab.

Let them all go out of business. What's the worst that could happen? Right, right. $50 to get fucking three blocks away. Now we're screwed, yeah. Screwed. When Uber gets to a place, there's no beating them. They decimate with low prices.

You can be like, we know what they're going to do, but no one's going to take a fucking $30 cab when they can take a $5 Uber. Yes, they decimate over there. But what they do, I mean, did this happen to you with the Uber, the cab driver? Yeah, that's what I wanna talk about. Go ahead. They try to make you, you pick up a ride,

they'll come pick you up, and then when you get there, they'll be like, can we just cancel the ride, and you just give me the cash? Yeah. And it depends how you do it. Oh no, no, no, no. It's not the cash, it's a brand new price. Oh, they give you a brand new price.

They get there, I'm like, I know you're interested, so now let's talk about how much it's gonna cost to go there. You're a tourist though. First of all, since I did a show there, it made the whole trip tax deductible. That's some Jew knowledge from me to you. You do one show anywhere, the whole trip's tax deductible. Yeah.

But then you gotta put what you made off the show? Yeah, but not much. The rest was research. Yeah. If I made $200 there for a show You know, I mean, yeah the whole trip it doesn't yeah put $200 and then everything else is going into like well I had all my meals. I have to get those $200. I had to pay for all that. Yeah. Yeah That's good. I need some due knowledge. Yeah. Yeah had a decent year Not your whole life just while you're there no No, no, I know, I know.

So for this DR trip, that whole trip is set. No, but this is completely taxed out. This is all business. Yeah, it's business. I'm not even like, it's not even a vacation. Yeah, but if you go to that fucking restaurant, that, oh right, but I'm saying if you stay five more days, that's all tax deductible too. No, I'm staying for eight days, but even when I'm not doing shows, I'm doing promo. I'm promoting the special, I'm doing podcasts, like all that. Exactly. It's all like a business. Exactly. But yeah, they will do that too,

but those guys, you gotta like, get the fuck outta here. Okay, but here's the deal, you're at Boca Chica, you call, and they go, they call you back. You're like Uber, whatever they call you, it'll be like, hey, how much did you go? So I'm saying, here's what I'm saying, if you're just gonna give me the money, it's like fine, but I normally put it on my credit card,

taxable credit card, that's all my fucking business account i'm losing our third to pay you cash yeah if it's a hundred dollars really after tax exemptions i think seventy yet what you know is what you do when it when it when that happens here's what you do you tell them leave it on the war leave it on the because it's not meant much money anyway but leave it on the bar and i'll just give you a good tip. Here's what they said. They kept saying with the split with Uber I get nothing. It's like okay, then I'll give you how much it would've cost.

They go no, you have to give me way more than that. I called five different Ubers in Boca Chica. One of them was like, called me, you know, you like say it, then they call you. And they go hey man, you're still getting me. So it's still gonna be 1500, not 1000. So like, you're still getting me. So it's certainly fifteen hundred not a thousand So like you want to do this or not one in fifteen hundred? Yeah instead of a thousand thousand a peso ride Which is fifteen thousand fifteen thousand

Yeah, fuck that It's more than the uber Same price I get it Anyway, whatever, they did it at the airport too. I had multiple cancellations. All right, but $1,500 with tip included, that's fine, right? $1,500 with, yeah, sure, with tip included. Yeah, tip included.

You just tell them tip included. Whatever it was, I don't remember the exact amount. I could look it up. No, from where you was at, from Gascoy, where you was at, by the Malecón to Boca Chica's $1,500. It's about 1,200 pesos. Whatever the Uber said, I think it was about that. They wanted to farm 50% more.

That's a lot, that's a lot. But also they, you know, they saw you, they saw you and they're like, this guy. I know. Or they just see your profile. Yeah. They don't come. Cause you get a Dominican and a Dominican will be like, what do you think I'm an asshole?

Yeah. Well, I finally got one who I guess it was new when he was like, all right, I'll drive you. Yeah. For the price it is. Yeah, yeah. Did he say anything or he was just- No, he didn't say anything. And I asked him, he said there was a lot of dancing around. Yeah.

He said dancing is really cool there. Boca Chica, I've been to, you know, I'm not as well traveled as you, but I've been to some places. You know, Boca Chica is top three best beaches to me of ever. I mean, they were shitting on Boca Chica there. They were. They were shitting on it.

They were like, oh, what are you going to have floating turds everywhere? They're like they're like you're like no it was like nice. It's gorgeous. Yeah paradise, dude Yeah, those guys are like far Rockaway. These are like high society. These are like high society guys So, um, like they have money like some of them have money So they'll go to black Punta Cana on Dolly or whatever, but dude, but the Boca Chica the food one I mean the food is good everywhere But like the beach food that you could get right right there

It's like and I have a guy there that like I've been going to for years So as soon as I show up, he's like what like he already knows man, like it just what do you eat there? It's fish fried fish. You got to get the fish You told me about that right fishing tostonas, but I get dude I get a feast so it's like fried fish fried chicken chicharrones tostonas fries You get all of it. We get the fucking Brugal bottle. We all have a bottle.

Like, we get cigars from the beach. We'll get the Johnny Cakes, which is like the little Johnny Cakes things that the lady's selling. Some people eat seafood. They'll get the mussels, like on the thing. I got the mussels. It's a feast. I got a fucking concha.

Yeah. The guy pulled the thing out and then put it in oil and lemon and fuck it. Part of the, oh my God, it's fresh. Yeah, we get a freeze. I mean, when you go there, you just want to eat like a king, man. And that's not like, those are like traditional, this is not like no corporate, there's no corporate business there, really. These are like traditional mom and pop cooks cooking this.

So like, that's like some of the most traditional food you could get on the island Oh on this in the stalls you mean and You on the beach like even eat like the ones walk by well the ones who walk by and even a lot of the the Hutts cooking what you would be like yo, this is not I don't want it like cuz I remember being that like the first time I went I was like I don't want to eat from here This doesn't seem safe, but then I ate and it was like, nah, this is great. It's so good. Some of the best food. Is it just like fresh fish? Yeah.

It's all coming up from right there. Yeah, from right there. They fish it, yeah. They can't be more than a day or two old. It can't be. Yeah, it's fresh fish. Unless it's low season. And you probably didn't go, but like, there's like,

did you go to the section like, at the end of the beach is like a whole thing of huts. It's like a food market, but it's all huts. If you're facing the beach to the right. Yeah. All the way on all the way at the end. Yeah. That's where I ate. Yeah. Those places are those. You must have told me about that. I think. How would I find it? I think Bourdain went there. I think when Bourdain I think his Boca Chica episode, I think he

went there. How's he doing? I gotta see the new show. That's like the most, that is like hot, like top shelf traditional Dominican food. These are people who are like, first of all it's dirt cheap. So it's like, you kinda like, you give them more than whatever they ask, and these are like mom and pop people who have been cooking for 50 years and just make the best food.

Everything is fried, you're not gonna get no vegan shit there. Everything everything is fried everything is deep fried and it's just like great like the fried fish the Johnny cake is they do do you get the fried potato like little fried potato or fried yucca you have fried yucca? Yep fried yucca is amazing. Yeah amazing it's so good. Tostones are really good too. And if they don't have them just go can I have some tostones too? Yeah like, sure, we can have some of that. I mean, there's no like, that's like one of the beautiful things about like why Dominicans

love going to the country. There's no like, we don't have, like, we'll get it. Oh, yeah, they buy it. We'll get it. I asked you something, they went to the stall next to them, got it, like, it's my business. We'll get it, yeah. Can you sell me a fish?

Yeah. And then I'll cook it for this idiot. There's no thing of like, we don't have. Yeah. Like, we'll get what you need. Stay there. OK, stay. Yeah, whatever you want. And they will go get it.

Whatever you want. Whatever you want. Ecuador was like that, too. The guy was like, making fresh ceviche. And it's another episode. But he was like, do you want lime? I was like, yeah. I goes, fuck.

You could. And he goes, stay here. And he went to a store. Like, he was back in 20 minutes. Dude, if you were craving something at Boca Chica, let's say you were craving a thing that they made in the capital. You could be like, I want this.

And they'll be like, if you really want it, we'll go get it. We'll go get it. No, it's not a problem at all. That's the type of hospitality that I love. I mean, it makes you feel like a king, to be honest. Especially when you're in a group. You go with the group usually? I'll go with my cousins.

I go with two of my Cousins and then like they're like their girlfriends are there I mean I had a girlfriend who lived there for a while and like we would go out and to be like a big group and It's just like it makes you feel like that scene in goodfellas when he walks in through the back Your dollar definitely goes further. Yeah, where they're like they'll get a table. I mean dude. I got a beach guy Boca Chica Well, literally when I walk in it's like goodf where literally when I walk in, it's like good fellas. Like he's like, it's like whoever's up, like this section you got to get up.

Like we're sitting in this section. Yeah, I've been going to him. I shout out to Jose in Boca Chica. I've been going to him. He just knows you. Yeah, I mean. Crazy, cause also like you probably, it's five months in between visits.

It's been years since I've been there. But I'm saying like every time you do go, he's like, it's not like you're there every day. It's like, you've been here years. Oh yeah, you're probably five months in between visits. It's been years since I've been there. But I'm saying every time you do go, it's not like you're there every day. It's like you've been there years. Oh yeah, you. But you know, if you go there, if you eat in a feast, you make yourself, you're memorable. That's a good point.

We know what this guy, as soon as we show up, and also we wanna show love, we wanna support. We know that the economy is not good, and if you got a couple dollars, you wanna get, and you know these are good people, They're not like doing shady shit. You want to show love So it's like you don't bring everything out bring it all out I love when they take care of you like if you give them a little like it's just a great when you make that connection With somebody I travel it. I learned I don't speak Spanish, you know, I try but I don't

I didn't get it taught when I was little so I do the best I can, you know, but that guy at Pjarr. Yeah He's making it. I was like I was like, what about this? He I can, you know? But that guy at Pijar, he's making it. I was like, what about this? He goes, I got you. Like, I can tell, like, through broken, he was like, I got you, I'll take care of you. And I was just like learning, like, tu es artista para comer.

And he was like, yeah, man! And every time, he's like, all right, all right, all right, I got new shit for you. It's like they get into the vibe of it. Yeah, I'm a big food person like that, too, where it's like, I like, I mean, I over, I like overindulge too much. it's like I like I mean I over I like over indulge too much It's kind of like yeah, but you have to over there like I mean

But honestly in from their perspective like and you'll get this like if you ever went to like if you visited somebody's home Or something you'll see this from their perspective. It's like an honor. It's almost yeah, right I was like sweet. I get to cook this yeah, yeah, it's almost disrespectful If you don't want him with food yeah to like for you get to cook but this guy appreciates it. Yeah it's almost disrespectful if you don't. To not flood them with food? Yeah, for you not to deny their food. To deny it. To you deny their food, yeah, because that's like a big way of Dominican showing love, which is like with their cuisine, so it's like you gotta just be like yeah,

and in worst case you just don't eat it, but you gotta be like yeah, cause it's like an honor. I got that chicharron every time, and then I worked my way around the rest of it. And they didn't even have an idea who you were. Like if they would have known. Dude, if they would have known who you were, you wouldn't have been able to leave. They would have just been giving you food. Like they would have sat you in the back

with giving you food and giving you, because they wanted like, that's the way of the, that's the way, I mean pictures. Has Gaffer got ever performed there, DR? I think he has. I'm not sure. I was trying to figure out if I was the biggest comic to ever perform there, outside of Central.

You were definitely the biggest comic at the comedy club. Yeah. At the comedy club for sure, but I think Gaffigan might have done like Punta Cana, like for the tour. That guy's gotta get that tour going. What's his name, that books the show there? Who'd you speak to? The guy who ran it.

Randy. Randy. Randy was, no, Tomas, Tomas. Tomas is the owner, but Randy is the promoter. Randy, yeah. Yeah, he was just like, what do we gotta do? I'm like, I don't know, tell people about either Puta Kana and Santos Domingo, or like ask people what they wanna do.

He goes, I could do gigs everywhere. I'm like, do it, there's so many comics it would go. Well, I mean, I'm going for next week. And I think, you know, they're like pretty much rolling out the red carpet. I told Monroe too. I spoke to Monroe. Monroe would definitely go.

I spoke to Monroe. I think they're rolling out the red carpet for me because they know that if this goes well, I could connect them with the people who want to do it. Because they want to get Norman out there too. But I told them, if you make it worth it, so you can trade, where it's like if you go to a ski festival, it's like, oh, the town can get your ski lift tickets. Yeah.

Well, that's the thing. And it costs them nothing, but it would cost us $200. I'm going there. They got, with the promotion, they got everything. Yeah, right. They got me a place to stay. They got me an Airbnb. They got me a car.

Right. That is money. If you get you a car, that saves you money, so it's worth it to go out there for a great time. Yeah, yeah. And then, but the top thing is, over everything, as I find it is in comedy, if the shows are good. That's a good point. It could be the worst thing.

If the shows are good, you can convince a comedian to go anywhere. Yeah, that show was really fun. Yeah, if it is, you can convince a comedian to go anywhere. The show was good. For me, I mean, this is gonna be like, it's gonna be like a, it is, you can convince a comedian to go anywhere. The show was good. For me, I mean, this is gonna be like, to me, this is like a fucking, it's like I'm

doing a garden for me, because it's like, this is where my parents were born. Damn, really? For me to be able to go back there and sell out a show of people who want to see me, and the art that they didn't even really respect, my parents. Right, right, right. It's like, we don't even have that when we grew up. Right, right. And you want to do this thing we didn't even have? Right, right, right. So to like we don't even have that when we grew up. And you want to do this thing we didn't even have. Right, right, right. So to be able to sell it out like that.

And I see my grandfather still there. My aunt, I got aunts and uncles over there. Like that's a huge deal for me to be able to do that. To him. And then, I mean, I got to take some time out to like do the cool shit too though. Yeah. Do you ever go to the mountains and go hiking and stuff? Of course. Yeah. You do? Yeah.

What are those like? I didn't get to that. I mean, we're from, the mountains in the north yeah. You do? Yeah, I've done, yeah. What are those like? I didn't get to that. I mean, the mountains in the north, more in the Ceballos, it's the Campo. The Ceballos, you can find them more, but where the town, we're from, San Cristobal, that's like a Campo town too, so it's like, my dad was born on a farm, and that's how he grew up.

So my dad, my grandfather owns a huge farm, and you go on a farm in his mountains, you can hike on it. Where's San Cristobal? And they're like, in the, imagine, say it's Cuba. Right here. At the bottom.

It's literally like 20 miles from the capital. Oh, in between, so do you pass that to get to Boca Chica? No say it's Cuba. Right here. At the bottom. It's literally like 20 miles from the capital. Oh, in between, do you pass that to get to Boca Chica? No, it's on the other side. Other side of Boca Chica. On the other side, going west. No, yeah going west. Going. Going west.

No, west. Going south and west. South. Wait. Santo Domingo's right here. Yeah. Santo Domingo's like right here. Yeah.

San Cristobal's like really on the edge. That way or this way? No, it's going west, it's going west. To get to San Cristobal? Yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Oh this way? No, it's going west. It's going west. To get to San Cristobal? Yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Oh yeah, Boca Chica's the other way.

Okay, I get it. Yeah. And east is all beach. Like some of the best beaches is Juan Dolio, which is a great beach. You can go to Juan Dolio. Juan Dolio is the next beach over Boca Chica. But it's like further and further and further.

I wanted to go to these places, but it was like another 30 minutes, another 40 minutes. And I'm like, I don't have that much time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Juan Dolio, La Romana, and then Punta, excuse me, Punta Cana. Tell me about the resorts. I, the resorts, I got done with the resorts. I dated, I-

Louis just said the same shit. Did he? Did he? Yeah. I, my girlfriend, I met my girlfriend at the time when I was like 21 at a resort. She was working at a resort and I met her. And she was like a young girl out of college. She was working the front desk at a resort. We became friends, we a resort. She was working at a resort, and I met her. And she was like a young girl out of college.

She was working the front desk at a resort. We became friends, we started dating. And I spent like four years going to Dominican Republic and going to resorts with her. So I've stayed at over like 30 resorts. And I'm just like, I'm just good on them. Like, they're fine, they're good. People are like, oh, this is so nice.

And I'm like, it's fine. It's fine. Also, like, I don't know, I feel like comedians, we're good. People are like, oh, this is so nice. And I'm like, it's fine. It's fine. Also, I don't know, I feel like comedians, we're not resort people. We're not resort people. No, we're not. We're really not resort people. That's not our thing.

Uh-uh. But it's great. I'll go to a resort, but it's great. But we're more like, now my family, we're planning a family vacation, reunion, and we rent a house. We're more like rent a house people. Let's just rent a big house.

All like do the shit we want. I did an island hopping comedy trip in Hawaii. And it was like on Maui, it was like there is a nice resort where it's like really spacious and it's not all inclusive, you know? And it was like that was cool, but the rest like house. House, we're house like you get a house. We're getting a house and a fucking Dominican chef

to just cook nonstop. That's like. It was what Louis was saying about Jamaica. Yeah, that's house we're gonna house in a fucking Dominican chef to just cook non-stop That's like is what Lewis was saying about Jamaica. Yeah, that's what we're doing We're just like non-stop like just keep the food coming like just never stop cooking Wow When we when my family gets together like that's how it is. It's like it's just non-stop cooking It's like women Seasoning shit men like grilling shit like it's like it's shit, men grilling shit. Like it's like, it's almost like, I mean it feels gluttonous. Like it's like, it's just nonstop.

That sounds cool. Dude, it's just nonstop. Like I remember, I remember my mom passed last year, but she was like a big, my mom was like the head of the family. He was like the person who would get all together. So my sister bought like a house in the Poconos, so we have like retreats and getaways to the

Poconos. And I remember like in our get togethers, like dude, we would wake up like, like I'm in the mood for steaks. And I was like, all right, the girl spent $200 on steak. And I remember like the last time we were there, like my cousin was in the mood for steak and I'm like, I kind of want seafood. And they're like, all right, let's just get some. So we had literally like a feast of like steak, shrimp and lobster. And I remember when we sat at the table and we were like, all right, let's just get some food. So we had literally a feast of steak, shrimp, and lobster.

And I remember when we sat at the table and we were like, who are we? What the fuck? I'm like, what the fuck? We're not these people. We're not these people. Yeah, we're not these people. Steak, shrimp, and lobster, who are we?

The royal family? Like, what the fuck? Yeah, but it's just so gluttonous. But the culture is like that. Food is literally like a love language in Dominican Republic. Like it is. So you visit family, but the culture is like that. Like, food is like, food is literally like a love language in Dominican Republic. Like, it is. So you visit family family when you're there.

Yeah, yeah. Wow. And they take care of you. I mean, it's just like, it's the way they show love. I mean, when you come from like a poor place, a poor country where like you came up with like not a lot of money, and the only thing you could really do is just food.

You don't need like a ton of money for that. Beans. Yeah, like, because a lot of money and the only thing you could really do is just food. You don't need like a ton of money for that. Beans. Yeah, like, because a lot of the cuisine is made from the scraps. It's like soul food is like made from the scraps. Like Cheecharron, rich people, that's not what the rich people were eating. Fried pig stomach. Oh, idiots. Idiots.

Fried pig, they're not eating fried pig stomach. Yeah, that's not what they were eating. And then you didn't even go like, because there was certain place where I'm like, I can't send you this by yourself. I can't just send you to this. You have to have somebody to show you around. Certain things, like there's fritura over there, which is fritura is like the fried food scene, which you gotta go to the hood for that.

It's like street food, fried street food, but it's like you gotta go to the best places that are in the most hood places. Like I need protection there? Not protection, just somebody who knows around. Like you? Yeah, it's not like you're gonna get around, but I wouldn't send you to wander there. You know, like you go, there's gonna be a line people are eating, but like you stand out.

Right. You know, I'm not gonna send you somewhere to like, dang, somebody who's from there will be like, yeah, go here, you know, they'll go. But it's just like, it's like a scene, it's like a whole scene of like, what can't we fry? Like, we'll fry anything. So it's like, dude, there's like, I was just talking about this with my family,

like I don't really eat with it. When I go there, like I'll have like chicharron, chicken, pork chicharron, longganisa, which is like, you have like chicharron chicken pork chicharron longanisa which is like you have a little lobster no no longanisa is longanisa longanisa is I think is intestine it's like fried it's so good and I don't eat weird shit but it's so good dude it's so good it's like fried cow intestine I think yeah yeah um but that's the thing like dude you could get fried cow tongue, fried cow ears. What is that, lengua?

Lengua, yeah. That's like a thing, like lengua. You could get bofe, which is like fried pig lung, I think. Longanista? Longanisa. Longanisa. Yeah, longa, N-I-Z-A. Longanisa food.

Longanisa. Sausage? It's like sausage, yeah. It's like pork sausage. Yeah. Yeah. Butusage? It's like sausage, yeah. It's like pork sausage. Yeah. Testa? Yeah. But it's like pig intestine.

It looks great. Dude, it is one of the best tasting food. Like lung? Dude, no, that's intestine. Similar to chorizo, also closely so Portuguese linguica. I believe. I'm not 100% sure. I know it's not anything good.

Bofa, I believe, is lung. It's like pig lung. It's like illegal in the States. Really? You can't sell lung. You can't sell cow lung. I gotta get 100% sure. I know it's not anything good. Bofa, I believe, is lung. It's like pig lung. It's like illegal in the States. Really? You can't sell lung. You can't sell cow lung. I gotta get to that. I wanna eat shit I can't get home.

Morsilla is like fried blood. It's like pig blood thing fried. It's like so good. It's like the worst things, but it's so good. It's like a scene. And I know some people are gonna watch this and they're gonna be like, this is gross, but it's so good. It's like a scene. And I'm not, I know some people are gonna watch this and they're gonna be like, this is gross, but... No, I just wanna know.

It's a real thing. I wanna know, what is that? Say that one again. Uh... Morosa? Uh, which one? The blood. The mor-silla.

M-O-R-S-I-L-L-A. Ah, mor-silla. Blood sausage. Blood sausage. Yeah. Wait, what? Yeah. Dude, it's, I think that's another thing

like Bourdain had when he went to DR. Blood sausage, oh yeah. No, they have this in like the UK also. Yeah. Red rice morchilla sausage. This is like deep fried and like. Damn, it looks gross when it's not cooked. It's black.

Yeah, it's black and you get it and you get it. Look at those tostones on top. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You get it with tostones like that, oh man. Wow, look at those tostonis on top. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You get it with those tostonis like that. Oh man. Wow. Look at this upscale, like at a nice restaurant, like their version of it. Like a fried egg and like,

Rich people ruin everything. Yeah, they really do. But yeah, you just, oh man, I'm excited to go next week. I'm gonna have all this shit. You're going next week? Yeah, I'm gonna have all this shit. Damn.

Yeah. How can you not? Dude, that place was like probably my highlight when I think of DR. I think of that baseball game. The baseball game. And I think of that fucking. Restaurant.

Yeah, that restaurant. Yeah. I don't wanna keep saying the name because I was like, I don't want, but it's like, that was the only place I got recognized at that place. Yeah. By a guy from Cuba.

Yeah? Yeah. Where you were ordering? I was at my table. And what'd he say? He was like, hey, you're not a comedian, are you? I'm like, yeah. He's like, oh yeah, I listen were ordering. I was at my table and what he say he was like hey you you're not a comedian Are you like yeah? He's like I am I listen to Yeah, Joe Rogan podcast yeah, yeah, there was the only place. It was great. What a great fucking time I

Couldn't have picked any better than that. Yeah, that place is great. That place is a gem in the capital Yeah, but that's like just one of many That's like one of many that's not like really yeah That's not like that's like going up pizzeria's like one of many. That's not like. Really? Yeah, that's not like, that's like going to a pizzeria here where you're like, oh this pizza was good and you're like, yeah, you gotta try this place. That's why I bleep out names of places

where I'm like, just, they're there, let's go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, you don't like it to get crowded and stuff? I don't like to get crowded. But this place is crowded though, no matter what. It is crowded. Like, it's not a hidden gem. It's like known.

This is not like some of you are finding, like hidden gems. Damn, it was so fucking good. Like the huts in the back of Boca Chica, those a hidden gem. It's like known. This is not like some of your find in like hidden gems. Damn, it was so fucking good. Like the huts in the back of Boca Chica, those are hidden gems. If you were to shout out like a certain hut. A certain hut, it would get like, oh, I guess we gotta go there. I don't want anybody to say, I guess we gotta go there.

I'm like, find your own, I'm sure there's other ones. It's not like you've tried every one. Yeah, no, no, no. You had one, you're like, I like this, I'm going back there every time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that place, I mean, yeah, we kinda got lost in food,

because it's like, it's so fucking good. I was not, but the empanadas are great, and then you can just be like a dollar, pretty much, you get a corn one or a cheese one, or, maybe too much, maybe it was 40 cents. I don't remember, dude, I don't remember anymore. I don't remember the price, I remember everything going, this is nothing, just take it.

Not quite like Southeast Asia, but just like pretty fucking cheap for everything. Yeah, it's cheap. I mean, also like where you were eating also, those are like expensive places because you're like in the city, like these are like no, those are like expensive places. These aren't like local.

Oh, right. Yeah, you know. Oh, probably, yeah, where you are. What's St. Cristobal's? St. Cristobal, yeah. Yeah, it's probably like, yeah, it's not upscale. No, no. Like the stuff is definitely cheaper. Obviously, if you where you are. What, San Cristobal? Yeah, San Cristobal, yeah. Yeah, it's probably like, yeah, it's not upscale. No, no. Like, the stuff is definitely cheaper.

Obviously, if you're in New York City, it's cheaper than they are, like in Staten Island. You know? Yeah, exactly. Fuck Staten Island. So I'm saying this. Let's just say here is Santa Domingo, and here is Boca Chico.

No, no, I'm sorry, here's Boca Chico, here's Santa Cristobal. Have you ever gone to these mountains up here? Yeah, that would be Santiago, that would be the north. No, no, I'm sorry. Here's Boca Chico, here's Santa Cristobal. Have you ever gone to these mountains up here? Yeah, that would be Santiago. That would be the north. No, and then the north is here, but you go up and this way, and there's actual mountains. The north is like a region.

It's not like the actual north. That's also the north, but the north is like everything north of the capital. Oh, really? That's like a small island. That's where it changes five. Yeah, it's like everything north of the capital is like the north. That is called it changes like five. Yeah, it's like everything north of the capital is like the north.

That is called El Cibao. What is that? El Cibao, that's just the name of the region. It's like a bunch of towns over there. Yeah, I've been through there. Is it nice hiking? Yeah, I mean, it is. I mean, like, you hiking like Peru and shit, right?

Nope. Or Ecuador? Ecuador, yeah. Ecuador, yeah. But it hiked in like Peru and shit, right? Nope. Or Ecuador? Ecuador, yeah. Ecuador, yeah. But it's nice in those places, tell me this, this is my, no one's really, they have trails, but no one's really on them. So it's like, makes it way better.

I don't think hiking is like a pastime over there. I don't think people are doing it. But I'm also like a guy, like I get bit by shit. Like, I get bit by animals. Like if there's like a wild animal that shouldn't bite you, it's biting me. What do you mean? Like I don't know.

Like I, like I've been bit. I've been bit. Like mosquito wise, like mosquito wise, like I get destroyed. Yeah. Like do you get bit? Yeah, I put heavy deed on. But some people like even with deed,

like I get bit dude. Really? Yeah, some people, I've sat next to some people who's like, there's no mosquitoes and I'm like, I'm getting killed. What the fuck are those people? Indians? Yeah. Well, I heard it's like your blood type. Yeah. They like your blood. Yeah. Hey. So how do they got to wrap it up soon? How do they feel about tourists there?

What would you say? I mean, they're the blood life. They're the bloodline of the economy. So were they nice in general or are they like, I found them to be. But like, I don't know. Yeah. I mean, tourists are like, I found them to be, but like, I don't know. Yeah, I mean, tourists are like, yeah, it's a different thing. I mean, tourists, like when the pandemic hit, they got destroyed. Like, I realized how much I liked it. They got destroyed. I mean, yeah, tourism is the bloodline of the country.

Like in Spain, in Genoa and like places like that, they kind of hate tourists. They like quit with these Airbnbs. You drive up prices. Oh, no, no, no're driving up prices, we don't want you here. Oh no, no, no. It's not like that at all. Not, not, not like that at all. And also Dominican as a people we're also like very like, we're kind of like a braggadocious people so we're like come so we can show you how dope we are kind of energy. So you kind of always feel that vibe. Like they don't want you, like

they want you to come and have a good time. We like to be the host. That's nice. That's like a thing. That's nice. I'll be a host. Let's smoke one of these fucking. Oh, the minakins, Opus X. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, you got a point. They do. Yeah. OK. I'll give you a really nice one.

Dude, honestly, you having your help on that trip made that trip fucking a billion times better. Yeah. No, I mean, it was a dude. Those dudes thanked me so much for getting you to like go over there. Like they were like so they were like so grateful. They could not. They could not believe it. Dude, those dudes thanked me so much for getting you to go over there. They were so grateful. They could not believe it. That's like the humbleness, the beautiful, I mean, you don't get that in America.

I mean, you could get that in some small cities in America. Like when you go and they're just so grateful that you came. Yeah, right. When you do the road. What are you doing here? They're like, yeah, you do the road sometimes. And they're like, I'm so glad you came. Like, I can't believe you came here.

And you're like, well, they paid me. It wasn't out of came here and you're like yeah you're like well they paid me it wasn't out of the good of my heart yeah like want this date this day right this money in DR they have that man where it's like thank you so much for coming like yeah we want you to enjoy it and we want you to tell people about it yeah do you have any before we go somebody like to ask people one do you have any countries in your mind that you want to like hey that's been itching at some point I want to go to such and such country. Yeah, I knocked two of them out this year.

One of them was Israel. Israel? And the other one I just did London. I never had been to UK. Okay. I never been to Europe. I did. And it's not on you? Like people ask me, like, do you wanna go to Russia? I'm like, not at all. No, London, not so much.

London is like New York. I mean, Israel you've always thought about. But Israel for sure, Israel for sure. What else? What's up there? And I was on the Mediterranean. Like I was on, my hotel, I was overlooking the. I was looking over. I was overlooking the Mediterranean like this. I was like, this is insane. Greece. Greece.

That's what Louis said too. Greece? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I guess you see it like in photos. Everybody's like posting when they're on the top of that hill, like Mykonos and all the white houses and shit. You been to Greece? No. Yeah. But Stavros always goes and I guess Giannis goes a lot. And the food is amazing. Yeah, it's weird.

Yeah. And Greek people is amazing. Yeah, it's weird. Yeah. And Greek people, like Greek Americans, they all go back to Greece. Yeah, yeah. Like, you know, Dominicans don't always go back there. Egyptians don't always go back there. Yeah. You know, even Jews don't go back to Israel. But the Greek people go to Greece a lot.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, Greece and that would probably... Greece. And now, you know, I would do Italy and stuff. But if I had to pick one, Greece. Yeah. And then, um... Monroe just did Africa.

He's trying to hook me up with a guy in Africa. Oh, he did this podcast. It was amazing. You should do that trip. Yeah? You should do that trip. He told me it's like 20 hours to get there, but... Fuck that, dude.

Stay as long as you can. Stay after the gigs. Yeah? He hooks you up right, Safari, the sun rises. Dude, yeah, if you have a chance. Just like Monroe to go to DR. Yeah, you would want to go there Yeah, oh my god. We went to Kenya right? Yeah, Nairobi. Yeah, Nairobi. Yeah, he oh my god Yeah, it's so beautiful. Yeah, I want to go to Africa. I mean I did animals I did I did I did my ancestry Diannation that everyone does. And I was like...

You're part African? Slightly, yeah. I found like 65% of my ancestry comes from like West Africa. Really? Yeah. So I definitely want to go over there, like Cameroon and those places. But I want to see Africa as a whole. Yeah.

I've seen Europe, Asia now. Israel is Asia, right? Cross off continents. It's Asia. Technically Asia, dude. And then I did Turkey. Or it might be Africa. now, Israel's Asia, right? Cross off continents, it's Asia, technically Asia, dude. And then I did Turkey. Or it might be Africa. No, it's Asia. Morocco starts Africa.

I did Turkey, which is Asia. Turkey's Asia, Europe, and I did London, which is Europe. So I'm not. It feels like Europe, but it is Asia, technically. It is Asia, yeah. It feels like Europe, then Africa, then Asia. Doesn't feel like Asia at all. Yeah, yeah.

But it is. Are there street dogs all over fucking D.R.? Yeah, but they're safe. They're safe. They're safe. Tell everybody You can see like a rock waller and it's like guys cool. He doesn't mind. He's mind his business I've never seen I'm sure it's happened. I've never seen a digressive one. They'll be fucking do you know why I heard in um, I Think someone's out these days of the street dogs everywhere. Why there's no aggressive ones why because they just killed those Although they start biting people like get rid of get Because they just kill those. Oh, they'll just do it? If they start biting people, they're like, get rid of, get that out of our town.

It's biting people. They just beat it to death, they get rid of it. And so the rest are either trained to not do that, or they've been killed off, they're aggressive. They just don't allow those out. Through evolution. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

That's a bigger fish. We need to apply that here with people. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You got any travel tips for these people? Yeah, man, listen, if you're gonna go to DR, but that's the thing,

because we took you to one place on Sunday, there's different tips. Just one city. I didn't want to be traveling all around. I didn't want to be going everywhere. And that's what they said, they want you to go back, they want to take you around. The beaches in Punta Cana are sick, right?

One of the, it's top 10 beaches in the world. Punta Cana beach is a ranked top 10 in the world. But I just don't like the resort life. I don't like it neither. Yeah. I like the city. I don't mind it. It's not like a miserable.

It's just an experience. It's not like a miserable. If you're with a good crew, you could have fun anywhere. I don't like cruises, but you're going on a cruise with a good crew. Joke is cruises is hella fun. Yeah, but cruises are shit. But if you're going to do it, it depends. If you've got a guide that's going to tell you, like I told you, I would say go to a

city and have you got somebody, a tour guide depends. If you got a guy that's gonna tell you, like I told you, I would say go to a city and have you got somebody, a tour guide that can show you around or tell you where to go, I would say that. But if not, if you just want to see the country, like I just want to dabble my feet into it, I would say go to Punta Cana, stay at a resort, try it, see what you think. Try some of the food. Try some of the food. It's local shit.

I mean, it's not local shit. It's like, it's a big company. You know, they're not. Yeah, it's like they're not. But it's fine. But it's good. It's fine. The beach is nice. The pool is nice. You'll meet nice people. You'll drink. It's fine. OK. Tip when you go to a resort tip, even if you get all inclusive, free drinks, buy some alcohol of what you like at duty free.

On the way home? No, on the way there. Oh, buy a couple of bottles of whatever you like to drink. You like to drink tequila? Get your tequila brand, whatever you like. Could you mind not be able to get it? Because you won't be able to get it. And you go to the bar, you just ask them for whatever, you mix it with it, and you drink,

you bring your bottle to the bar. A lot of the all-inclusives to drink is like not the most top shelf. If you're going to drink beer, that's fine. The president doesn't mind, but just. I've had travel tips in general for travel. Yeah. When you're traveling.

Just, oh, in the world? I always say like Danny Brown says travel light Travel light. It's hard you travel light. No, but it is but it's better. It is better some shit when you get there Yeah, I do that too, but I don't travel light. I know but it is better Small suitcase. Yeah, I thought it was under I want to be under this. Yeah. Yeah, I'll say get a get a global entry and precheck Yeah, I'll say get a get a global entry and pre-check Ian Laura a great New York comedian a fucking ambassador to the fucking country of Dominican Republic My people great time. Well, that's the episode everybody. I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you Ian Laura for coming in obviously I messed up the recording. I'm a DIY guy and I screw up stuff all the time

So you did not probably see the mama wanna that I poured for him, but it was delicious. It was a little chalky to be honest. Next week, Daniel Sloss is on the podcast talking about Russia. Should be a good episode. Don't forget to hit like and subscribe, leave a comment. If you've been to Dominican Republic or if you've been to Russia next week, if I can leave some tips for everybody else on what to do while you're there. This episode was produced by Your Mom's House Network, edited by Alan Caffey. And that's it you guys. Don't forget Shroomfest July 20th, 21st and 22nd. Take mushrooms with all of us somewhere in the world. Hope you have a good time and continue tripping wherever you are. See you next week guys.