You Be Trippin' - Ecuador w/ Joe List & Sarah Tollemache | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: July 7, 2025

Make sure to watch Joe's latest special Small Ball out now! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXAEFZ-z_ns Check out Sarah's specials B*tth*le Money and Voluptuous Boy on her YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@sarahtollemachecomedy Follow Joe on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/joelistcomedy/ Follow Sarah on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/stollemache/ Book the EXACT Mindo AirBNB that Ari, Joe and Sarah stayed at! https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/6013792?viralityEntryPoint=1&s=76&adults=1&unique_share_id=7777AE9D-0BAC-407A-96CC-B907AB232137 SPONSORS: -Start your new morning ritual & get up to 43% off your @‌MUDWTR with code TRIPPIN at http://mudwtr.com/TRIPPIN ! #mudwtrpod -Go to https://ThriveMarket.com/TRIPPIN , to get thirty percent off your first order, plus a FREE sixty dollar gift just for signing up. On this week's episode of You Be Trippin', Joe, Sarah, and Ari reminisce about their trip to Ecuador. Their trip was full of beautiful jungle greenery, sketchy gondola rides, and delicious arepas. Besides the waterfalls of diarrhea and thinking they might get mugged at night, they really make it sound like the trip of a lifetime. Some highlights you won't want to miss: the story of them losing the airbnb host's horse and all the amazing pictures they share, especially the ones of Bandit. Chao! You Be Trippin' Ep. 74 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:32 - COVID Travel 00:10:00 - Landed in Ecuador 00:23:05 - Exploring Churches & the Equator 00:38:22 - Mindo 01:06:16 - Joe's Diarrhea Disaster 01:21:07 - Water Rafting 01:28:55 - Joe's Pics 02:02:10 - The Wall Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Can you cut that for me? I still wanna do whales. So I'm gonna have Sarah and I. That was the best trip we ever did. Snowdonia. I actually thought this is what we were doing. We could do that. We could do whales.

We can't just call it a audible. But no, let's just do Ecuador. Why not? We haven't even started yet. This was the plan. No, Ecuador's fine. What was the plan? Because we had a lot of funny stuff all together in Ecuador.

Yeah, we could do whales if you want. No, let's do Ecuador. But can't we come back again sometime? Yeah, for sure. That's one of the fun things about this podcast. Or we could do Whales in Wales. Whales in Ecuador, you mean? Whales in Wales?

If we go over while you guys are over there. Oh, Whales in Wales. Yeah. Whales in Wales, yep. Yep, let's do Whales in Wales. Let's take a little jaunt. A jaunt, yeah. That's a great idea. Where you been and where you going?

This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's UB Trippin', yeah. Welcome to UB Trippin', everybody. It's a travel podcast. Every week it's a different guests. Today, two guests. Ooh.

That took one trip. But we're kinda one, if you think about it. Yeah. You have a union. We have a union under the Lord. Yeah. No Lord. We did not involve the Lord. You were there.

Bobby Kelly married us, for God's sakes. Bobby Kelly married you was always a mistake. Yeah, I fucked up. That was my bad. Now I don't even like him. Oh, that's terrible. I know. Sarah Tolamache.

Right. Hilarious comic from New York City by way of Houston. And Africa. And Africa. Right. I'm a refugee. Oh yeah. Yeah.

Were you worried about Trump? This is like my favorite was when like stop Asian hate happened and the Indians were like, yeah, it's tough for me. Like, shut up. Right. You can't join in on this one. You're like, I am, I too.

I too am technically Asian. Right. I am an immigrant. And Joe List. Hi. Stand-up comic, new special out right now. Well, that's not new by the time this comes out. I know, because you didn't tell me.

Well, I forgot. I didn't bother you. Called Joe List, sitting on faces. What? Small ball. Small ball. Also known as. You're very judgmental.

If I tell you what I'm doing, you go, oh, that's stupid. What the hell? I just don't tell you. I've never ever said a special is stupid. You go, why are you doing it like that? Right. Yeah, that's true with that fucking chinless. Why not go add a chin feature?

I'm thinking about it. Joe, a trippy award, a returning trippy award. Why do you want a trippy award? Did I? 2024 trippy award. I did? Yeah, worst sexual adventure. What?

Worst sex, not getting laid on the Inca Trail. I know, I fucked up so bad. I'm such an idiot. Aw, you went with the zucks. I just reconnected with her, by the way. And I brought it up, I'm like, God, I should have made a move, and she's like, no, you shouldn't have it up I'm like God I should have made a move and she's like now you shouldn't have and I was like alright but we stepped in a

fucking I didn't really bring it up by the way we slept in a two-person romance tent and I just sat there like an asshole what's that? It's a trippy award. Really? Yeah. Oh my goodness. You're serious? We don't have room. We don't have room. Sarah's mad. I'm like getting, this is my wife in a nutshell. I'm getting a war, I'm touched. Yeah, but our place looks getting hoardery.

Touched. It's getting hoardery. It's not hoardery. This is beautiful, are you kidding me? We can put that on the shelf by your hockey players. Did people vote for this? No, we had nominations for sex. We're sexual adventure.

Yeah. Not getting laid in the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu. This is great. I got to reach out to her. Do you want to thank anybody? That's weird. This is written on the other side in reverse. I want to thank my parents for giving me no self-esteem

to make a move with my ex-girlfriend 4,000 miles away while we slept in a romance tent. We had the mosquito net. Not the mosquito net, like a romantic net. You know the whole story. I told it. And I just sat there. I just sat there not, I was like, oh, good night. It's a diarrhea. Really took a lot out of you. I should have at the very least. Lube. I mean, we're there. We're in a tent. Where's she going to go? Call the cops? We're in Peru.

Where's she going to go? This the cops? We're in Peru. Where's she gonna go? This shit's legal in Peru. Yeah. Did I just get us demonetized? I'm only kidding. This is really meaningful to me. I appreciate this. Really?

Yes. Nice. I like this. Well, I have an award for my special this year's material. I won a big award. A Webby. It's like a web. Was it a Webby?

Something like that. It wasn't a Webby. It was something. It was a TV ward. Oh, come on. Was it a Webby? Something like that. It wasn't a Webby. It was a TV ward. Oh, come on. This is really nice. Thank you. Can I say, Ecuador, we're doing Ecuador.

You guys were the only ones to come. I was there for six months. Everybody's like, let me know when you're at the beach. Let me know when you're in the mountains. Let me know when you're at the Amazon. Everyone's like, well're in the mountains, let me know when you're at the Amazon. Everyone's like, well, we have so much time now because of COVID, no one came. And it was, the travel was relatively easy.

No one on the plane. There was like two other people. It was an empty plane. It wasn't even relatively, it was spectacularly easy. We took a private jet to fucking Peru. I mean, there was like 11 people on the plane. I'm so surprised that the airline went ahead with that. They should just be like, no, we're not going.

Cause it was pre-vaccine too. Pre-vaccine. And we landed and everyone was in like hazmat suits, like outbreak. I thought we had to get vaccinated. Or we had to get something to show up. A test, right? A test.

It's crazy this wasn't this long ago and it's tough to remember all these little in the details of whatever ideations. We did not have to get tested because when I landed at that point, I still had not been tested because people were freaking me out about the test. They said it goes up in your nose. I guess your brain.

So I went the longest without getting a test because it freaked me out. And I remember landing and being very nervous that they were gonna test us and they didn't. We just walked right in. That time with the AIDS test. 100%, we did nothing. You just walked right in.

And you guys were late picking us up. That's how it started. We land in a third world country. We got three months to play. We're the only ones that came and we're just sitting there like idiots without a piece of cake. That's a line from only ones that came, and we're just sitting there like idiots without a piece of cake. That's a line from Seinfeld.

But we're just sitting there and I'm like, where are you? It was so frustrating. It was like, we gotta go, we gotta go, we gotta go. And then we went the wrong way on a thing. We're like, oh, this is the scariest thing to land. It's not JFK. No, I find airports, I had this in Costa Rica, couldn't find the airport.

Eventually this lady on the road figured out that we were in distress and was like, follow me. Guided you? Yeah. Thank God it was a lady. I know. What were you expecting going into Ecuador? Cause you'd never, I mean Peru I guess is something similar.

I had never gone. I didn't think, I went in open-minded I guess. Meaning like- You went. Yeah, I just, I wasn't think I went in open-minded I guess meaning like yeah I just I wasn't nervous I think a lot of people get nervous when they go to especially foreign speaking countries well the weird thing was it was COVID and everyone at that it was very early so it was still like if we get COVID in Ecuador are we gonna die or fuck it like whatever and then James Patterson our buddy who lives in Key West hilarious comedian He's like a world traveler another bowl

Bowl yeah for my own ash for your own Rules great guy, and he's a world traveler and a Drunkard adventurer and he was like before before we left, like looked us in the eyes and was like, guys, seriously, be careful down there. And I was like, oh my God, is this crazy? Because again, like it's don't, if you're listening to this story, don't look at it as like 20, 25 COVID,

we overreacted, we're idiots. This was like the heat of the heart of COVID. Yeah, no one was traveling yet. I felt, but I had, there was a part of me that felt cavalier, like, aren't we cool for doing this? I mean, it seems dangerous and reckless, but now looking back, you're like, it was totally fine. And I, after that and several other trips,

I was like, it's the easiest time to travel. Yeah, you had to look back, that's the thing. It's like, it really, it was so easy. Yeah. Well, and you- Open seats, you remember the open seats? Yeah. It was to look back. That's the thing. It's like, it really, it was so easy. Yeah. Well, and you- Open seats, remember they open seats? Yeah. It was all open seats.

All down the middle, there was no middle seats cause you'll be too close. And meanwhile, somebody's coughing on your neck. Right. Like, you can put yourself, your feet over the thing. But they always talk to like, you can't really get COVID in the air, even though there has been planes that

the whole plane just gets diarrhea on a five hour trip. Yeah. Then you're like, so how does that happen? But we can't get COVID up here. And then you guys were already there and it just felt like, okay, they're there. Somebody's there. I always feel that with travel. I'm like, well, somebody went there.

A white person went there. That's how Bonnaroo was with like, could you imagine sleeping in the tents? And you're like, well, 80,000 people do. It's not like everyone's doing it. It's not like no one's doing it. It's not like three homeless guys are doing it. Yeah, and I've been everywhere. When we went there, it was just like, I might not come back.

We didn't know how bad it was going to get, COVID. Well, you're a not come back kind of guy. No, but it was also like, remember they said the flu and COVID together is going to be the super thing, and it's going to just kill humanity. And it was like, oh. Was that after the BLM?

Because there was a moment after BLM where I'm like, all right, if we're all hanging out in huge groups and it's game on, I'm doing whatever I want to do. Thank God for the blacks that are in troubles. It really helped us out. That's been post, yeah. They went in canaries in a coal mine. We had the funniest, because we were staying,

at that point in the COVID, we were staying in Louis' fucking massive house, Louis CK's massive house out in a coal mine. We had the funniest because we were staying at that point in the covid we were staying in louis fucking massive house louis ck's massive house out in uh shelter island that's fine yeah we were out in shelter island and staying there and then all the riots and everything was happening and then we went back to like a barbecue people like were you at the march and we were like no we sat it out we were on shelter island, like rowing around a mansion. I'm like, no, we were kind of making fun of you. We were those people on 9-11 that were looking at them from across the water.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like, ooh. No. In fact, we didn't even cross our mind to go there. We didn't think twice of it. I didn't want to be in the way. Yeah. I didn't think once of it.

I didn't want to be in the way. That's so funny. Yeah. So, okay, you're right. So I would like to apologize for not picking you guys up on time. And it was like 45 minutes out of the gate too. Wasn't even like...

It was nerve wracking. And it was nighttime. We flew in at night. It was pitch black. We're in a country that I've never been to or know about and everyone's wearing hazmat suits and we're just the only whites. I love good whites.

I love whites too, the best. So then how did it feel? So then what did we do? I forgot. We went to town. To Quito. To the old town. Yes.

And we ate at a restaurant. On a roof. On a roof. Oh yeah. You know what it reminded me of? Have you ever watched that movie with Tilda Swinton where they're the last vampires, the last lovers left and they're in Turkey or something.

And there's no one around. It just felt like we were in a vampire town. Sorry. It's him doing, beaming his butt heads. I can't stop doing butt heads. I don't know when that came back from here. Okay. I'm saying that again for the first time.

I was like, it's so demeaning. Well, that area of town just felt like there were vampires. It was just a vampire town. Didn't they get hit hard there or something like that? With COVID. From what I understand, right away, they were so unequipped that they were piling up bodies on the streets

and there was a picture of kids walking to school past dead bodies. And then the whole country was like, I don't care if this part might not work, if this might not work, we're doing everything. We don't ever wanna have that again. So there'd be like alternate side fucking parking, alternate side driving, masks in the cars.

We were like seeing people with masks in their cars alone. We're like, what? And they were like, we're doing everything. Guys, I'm gonna break in really quick and let you know about the guests. Sara Tolomas and Joe List, not only the great friends that came to visit me in Ecuador, really the only ones that came to visit me in Ecuador,

but they're also amazing comics. I'm not joking. They're like, make me laugh so fucking hard. And I'm sure they'll make you laugh too. They got specials out right now on YouTube, both of them, which is such a great time for stand-up comedy. I mean, my special Jew, obviously on there, but Sarah Tolomache got a great one, butthole money.

It's on Sarah Tolomache comedy on YouTube. Check it out, how long is that? 40, like 45 minutes? Not long. I know that's a lot of people, like I don't wanna commit to a 90 minute fuckin' guy, you know, blowin' hot air for fuckin' 90 minutes. We could that's a lot of people like I don't want to commit to a 90 minute fucking guy, you know blowing hot air for Fucking 90 minutes. We could just do a tight 45 who would do 90 minutes

We can do a tight 45 what a loser not Sarah Tolumash tight 45 And then Joe list has a new one called a small ball also available at Joe list on YouTube That is a tight how long is that movie? Let Let's see let's look it up 55 56 56 not bad yeah they're both hilarious you guys check them out on Instagram also Sarah Tolamash is s on Instagram s-t-o-l-l-e-m-A-C-H-E and JoList is JoList Comedy. I am there at Ari Shafir on Instagram. I've got, no, I've got one more tour date.

I've got Charlestown, West Virginia on July 12th. AriShafir.com. Subscribe wherever you're listening or watching, you guys. Subscribe to this podcast. Every week it's a new episode where we just go to a different place with the guests this is one that I was the guest on as well as the guests there's a couple joint trips me and Bobby Kelly to Cuba me Sarah and Joe lists to Ecuador there's another

one coming about Guatemala and then sometimes I'm just the guest and almost always I'm not the guest at all I I'm just an interviewer. Um, yeah. I also have stickers available right now at the website or if you're watching on YouTube right below stickers and t-shirts that you be tripping. Fucking sticker and t-shirt. There's two colors for the sticker. Boom boom. And a third color, which is is clear which you can put in your

passports that's something I'll do in the outro I'm gonna put it in my passport I got a new passport. Joelist is on the road also go check it out Joelist comedian Joelist online or you can go to punchup.live slash Joe dash list slash Joe-list-slash-tickets. Just look it up. He's gonna be in Portland, Maine, New Hampshire, in Portsmouth, Burlington, Vermont, Northampton, Massachusetts, Woodstock, New York, Morris Plains, New Jersey, Denver, Colorado, the famous ComedyWorks.

Good tickets right now. And that's it. Also the Shroomfest shirts, the pre-sale is starting now Lee and Gwyn aka Abra Kadavra made amazing super fucking cool shroom fest shirts shroom fest this year is September 6 7th and 8th I believe let me check that out September 6 7th and 8th if you don't know what shroom fest is it's just international holiday for mushrooms to celebrate it's kind of like Christmas it doesn't have a place it's kinda like Christmas, it doesn't have a place.

It's not like Mardi Gras that has a place. It's like Christmas, the place is in your heart. So wherever you are, do mushrooms. And if you wanna have a t-shirt to celebrate, we do a different one every year. All the proceeds go to Lee and Gwyn, he gives a lot of the money to MAPS, Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies.

Guys, can you put up the fucking Shroomfest design right here? The pre-sale's right there. We might have limited run for some colors, limited. But if you get it during the pre-sale, they guarantee you, which is over, I don't know, probably early August, but definitely the next few weeks. They can get it to you by Shroom Festival.

You can wear it while you're on them. Or I would suggest not doing that so people don't stare at you, but actually you can't really tell that it means you're on Mushroom Festival. It's a cool design. Show the design again. Cover the whole screen.

Let me hear you talking while I'm covering this whole screen. That's a cool design. Do you be tripping stamps? The stickers and the t-shirts are cool, but also that. All right, let's get back to the episode. I think I've said everything. Stay tuned for the outro. I'm going to cover everything in here and a little bit more about that trip.

Thank you very much. Back to the episode with Joe List, Sarah Tolamache, all about Ecuador, mostly Mindo. Yeah, no, it was very hazmaty, Sue. But I also, my memory is we went to whatever the hotel was. In Old Town. Yeah, it was really cute. Was it a hoth stall or? Oh.

No. We couldn't put toilet paper. Down. The toilet and put it in Ziploc bags. And Joe and I were so grateful we weren't newly dating. Oh yeah. You put them in Ziploc bags. Yeah, yeah, you just take a big shit

and then you gotta fill up a bag with turds and be like well anyways I'm an Aries but I also remember getting fucked up because the room was spinning because there was altitude there I had a little altitude sickness. It was a little yeah vertigo. Yeah yeah I was like freaking out not freaking out but I was it felt like real vertigo-y.. Wait, which hotel was this? Was this where we had the monster keep trying to trail us? Yes. Yeah, yeah.

You and I went to let the dog piss, and then, oh, I got a bunch of shit for it, because I came back on Tuesdays with stories and talked about it, and people were like, typical white privileged asshole, and I'm like, no, no, there was a fucking serial killer. The employees were like, wait, wait till he clears. He was menacing. He was so menacing. Some of it obviously is like, wait, wait till he clears. He was menacing.

He was so menacing. Some of it obviously is like, oh, it's in a foreign country, we're a little scared more than we should, but some of it is like, no, but not this neighborhood. We had another moment too. I thought we were all gonna get robbed. Yes, we had another moment where a guy rode up and bike and I actually, I felt very proud of myself.

Same neighborhood, old town Keystone. Yes, the next day. Old town was funky. I was very cleverly, I was happy, I put my hand in my pocket and I slid my debit card out of my wallet because the guy rode his bike, he did a circle around us and then stopped in front of us and I saw, I was like pulling my credit card, I was like, all right, I'll give him my license.

But you didn't really say anything, did he? No. I think in the end, he was like, saw his friend right past us and he was like, go to me. Yeah, yeah. And he was like, saw his friend right past us. And he was like, go to me. Yeah, yeah. And we were like, that was a close one. Whew, we reported a disaster.

It was scary, but he definitely did like a little loop around us and then like stopped us in our path. Yeah, yeah, I remember that. But I kind of flexed, I think that might've had something. It definitely had something to it. Oh yeah. Yeah. That's me getting a tattoo in Ecuador.

Oh yeah. That's one. a tattoo in Ecuador. Oh yeah. How's that one? Oh yeah, I forgot. You got that before we showed up. No, you got it after. Is it after? Yeah, you got it towards the end of the trip. I had just done ayahuasca,

and so it was very convenient to have sober friends come in an eight day period where I was not allowed to drink. Yes, I remember you had just done ayahuasca because my eyes hurt from rolling them at the story. They separated you and your friend. They're like, you can't be together. We wouldn't do it. I'm like, this sounds retarded.

But this is where we pass in our, whatever you call it. Yeah, I mean, we had just done it. We had just done it. Yes, and you told the story and you have to talk to a guy with a bone through his nose and he dances and paints your face. But I suspect there's a lot of grifting in the ayahuasca business.

That's my- Gotta be. Right, where there's, I'm having, I picture some light fingers in me. Yeah, there is that. There is that, also- To get to guide me into the spiritual world. Yeah, just some light fingers.

Listen, mostly clit work, mostly clit work. There's some penny, but mostly clit work. Yeah. Okay, okay, let's get back to our trip. Sorry, sorry. Okay, but anyways, the hotel, yeah, the hotel was with the dog, and we, and you were like. Daytime was lovely.

Can I say daytime was lovely? Yes, it was lovely. But it felt like when Sun was about to head down, everybody started boarding up and running home. That's why it felt like vampires were about to come out. Yes, it was dark and literally one person. And I wanna say this because everyone thinks of me as this pussy and I have Austin.

I run away from homeless people. People also think I'm five, six for some reason. But you think that and I'm with door people also think I'm five six for some reason But you think that number has multiple sex with men and then they think you're This tough crazy guy you decided your dog wouldn't piss for 12 hours because it was that terrified It was you're like you pick up the dog. You're like he can piss in my mouth Well, we saw this guy coming at us hard and they were like, let's go back in let's go back in and they were like Okay, there's no one else in the street. When we saw this guy coming at us hard and then we're like, oh, let's go back in. Let's go back in. And then we're like, okay, there's no one else in the street. So he's going away. Yes.

And so we waited 15 minutes. Yeah. A while. Where were you guys going? To let you- Just to walk the dog. Oh, to walk the dog. Just to walk Bandit.

And then it was like, okay, he's gone. And then we got outside and the guy just comes out of the corner like- He popped out. And he just like comes at us so fast. Yeah comes out of the corner like, your mouth. And he just like comes at us so fast. It was like a video game. Piddy, Piddy, Piddy, Piddy, Piddy, Piddy, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. He's back.

No, it was fucking horrifying. And then there was like also another guy like sitting there. It was like two men, it was fucking horrible. Downtown Quito and Old Town and all of Guayaquil are the scary parts of Ecuador. Yeah. Everywhere else is really nice. Yeah, everywhere else felt, I wouldn't say American,

but it just felt like a regular, nothing unusual. Nothing unusual. Which they look at as America. I remember when I went on my, I think we talked about this, when I went on my Peru trip, the guy, our guide, Kike, was like,

no, I'm American. South America. And you're like this. Okay, buddy. Yeah. Sure. You're the co-actor. But it is South America.

It is South America. But it's like, you know what I'm talking about. Of course. Why are you knocking that? Is the sound not working? Are we not getting this? Because I'm on fire. No, we're getting it.

I just want to be sure. Bop. Yeah. I don't know why you don't have a person. You do very well. Because, yeah, it's like last minute ones. It's an extra schedule. All right.

Yeah, it's another person. This was last minute. Yeah. But that's the only way we can schedule stuff. Very last minute. We have a child in the car. We cracked one of the windows. He's driving around.

I think. Okay, so we made it through the first night. That was the first night you guys were there. Yeah, that was the first night. Did we fuck around first, or we just went straight to the hotel? We went to the hotel and then we went out and ate. Yeah.

But we didn't like tour, because you got in at night. Yes. Okay. And then we went to bed. I got, I was off-fogging. I don't even remember what I ate. I don't remember what we ate either.

I think it was some soup with corn in it and a hominy. It wasn't in some of the other. That's not my dumps was some soup with corn in it. Well, we'll get to that. That was, I forget, it's like a potato-y cheese soup. I forgot what it's called, fuck. Not Puyo De Seco, no. I think I had spaghetti or a cheeseburger.

I should have. Probably a burger. That was nice though, the rooftop. That was wonderful. I never really explored downtown, like downtown Quito without you guys. No, it was great. Yeah, and then we ate it at another day, the next day. I think we went to another restaurant.

In the square? Yes. Yeah. Or a nighttime where we played cards. Wasn't that, that one? That was in the, on the, That was post illness. The book end of the trip.

Yeah, okay. Well, you look horrible there. What? Oh, fuck, I was gonna say something. Wasn't there, didn't we just miss the thing where you spray people, people run up and spray you with shit? Yeah, yeah.

I'm so glad I missed that. That wasn't in Quito, that was in, something with a G. But yeah. Chito? They have all these like neighborhood or like county festivals. I think it's all like from Christianity and their own fucking basic. Subculture. Yeah, and so they just like combine it and one of them was like spray peachable and especially gringos.

Because you were telling me about it and I almost canceled the trip. You're like, yeah, people run up and they throw paint in your face. It was a paint day though. It was like, this is horrible. It was like everything I could do to be like, hey, let's mitigate, let's minor what we say to Joe, because he's on the fence the whole time. I was gonna come, I was always gonna come.

It's just, I didn't want a fucking 13 year old Cuban boy throwing fucking wet paint at my face. Were you worried at all? No, I don't think I was, but I don't really think I heard any details about what's a possibility. We also, yeah, we did not know anything. How come I'm blind? We totally just put all of our stuff

and you guys taking us around. I mean, yeah, we're there. So it's like, I'm sure if we're dead. Yeah, I didn't know the name of the towns we were going, where we were staying, anything. We literally just were like, we're flying here. And then that was it. I've ruled.

Yeah. So we fucked around downtown Quito, old town. Yeah, we did, went to a church. This one? Yes. Big church. Walked a plank. Oh, and there was a big tall fucking thing.

We were up in the rafter. We were up in that rafter there. It was slightly unsettling. It was like a really old, small plank. I think up in the rafter. We were up in that rafter there. It was slightly unsettling. It was like a really old small plank. I think we have those photos too. We had to climb a ladder and get on a plank. Your friend stuck around, already went to it. Is that right?

Oh, there it is. Yeah, because your friend's not in the photos. No. Right, right. Yeah, yeah, that was kinda, it was definitely, fuck it, it was very flaky. Oh yeah, that's right. It wasn't like, oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. That was kind of, it was definitely fucking, it was very, Oh yeah. That's right. I was, it wasn't like, Oh, it's been there. You guys go, yeah. That's dingy as shit. No, it was rickety. And this is that tower. Yes. Yeah. And we're in it

up. Um, wow. We were way up in there. No, it was fucking spectacular. It was very cool. Churches are the coolest thing. Aside from all the child R word. Look at that. That is fucking awesome. That's you with the Phillies hat? That's me. It's not a Phillies hat, you jackass.

Why would I wear a Phillies hat? It's a Maine hat. It's the state of Maine, which I wore in a film you might have heard of on 4th of July. Oops. What's that? You have not heard of it?

Okay, that means it. Born on the 4th of July. Yes. With Tom Cruise. Yeah, Joe was in that as a baby. Tomas Caminar. I wasn't a baby, I was seven. That was a little seven year old veteran.

God, that church ruled, I forgot about it. And did their lookout too somewhere, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, there we go. Look at that. That's all of Quito. That is fucking dynamite. There's always a cross on a hill. You gotta have the cross on a hill.

You can always count on a cross on a hill in South America. Look, it's pretty dangerous. Jam-packed. Yeah, no, it's a little bit. They like to jam-pack it. It's a bit gnarly. Can I say, the phones we have these days are nuts. The fact that I can do this and you can zoom in on it

and still really see it. If you did this on an actual photo with a Kodak, it would just be, it would look like a painting. Enhanced, section 7G. No, this is actually fun because I kind of don't remember a lot of this. I mostly remember Mindo. Mindo, oh yeah, well that's where.

Oh, there we are across the equator. The equator. The equator. The mask, outdoor with the mask on. No one's gonna. Oh there we are across the equator. The equator. Outdoor with the mask on, no one's gonna be upset about this. They're gonna be so mad. I can't picture the YouTube credits being, of credits, comments being bad. And that's a good dance.

Me and Doe del mundo, center of the world. Look at that, and then we had to balance a thing. You gotta balance a fucking. The egg. With an egg, but then they told you you can do that pretty much anywhere. No. Yeah. Oh I didn't hear that part. You can do that pretty much anywhere. No. Yeah.

I didn't hear that part. You can balance and. Egg on a nail. You can get an egg to balance anywhere. Wait, did you know this was there or did we tell you it was there? What? The equator thing.

The equator thing? I mean, I knew the equator ran through Ecuador. Yeah. But. We knew that that was their selling point. I think you were taking us there, here, whatever. Today's episode of You Be Trippin' is brought to you by Mudwater.

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to get 30% off your first order. Plus a free $60 gift just for signing up. That's thrivemarket.com slash trippin. Thrivemarket.com slash trippin. Trust me, I use it. This dance is pretty good. Can we also talk about, was it on the way there we saw a person completely wipe out on their moped?

Oh, right. Oh, yeah. And we went to go kind of check, make sure they were okay, but at the same time in the back of my head, I'm like, this could be a scam. Could be a, that's New York in you. Could be a scam. Bleeding out of their face.

While they really went for it this one. He sent it. Was it a boy or a girl? It was on a roundabout. Yeah, on the way here, it's right near Mitado Mundo. Yeah, and then just sprayed stuff everywhere. Their backpack flew open. I wish we could airbrush the mascot.

I'm gonna get 48 emails. They required masks. They required it. They did require it. Big require. It's a big mask though too. You got that fucking. Yeah, it was huge.

Double, I may have done some double masking at one point. Oh, at one point it was double mask. It went from mask to no mask. Oh, that's beautiful. Look at that. Nice cup of tea. That, god damn, I miss this place. I forgot about the equator.

Yeah. North and south, SN. Isn't it crazy that They just balance that ball structure That looks like the fucking trippy. What looks like the trippy? Oh, yeah That's trippy folks. That is trippy. That's nice. I'm the green tea guy The other great TGA so this was on the way the way T is going to come back What do you mean T in this tea is going to come back. What do you mean? Tea in this story is going to reappear.

Oh yeah. Tea is pushing. The Easter egg. Yeah. That's the gun in the first play. The first act. Remember tea everybody, wherever you go. Okay.

We're drinking like green tea. Me Tadal Mundo was cool, being on both sides of the equator doing shit like that. Cause that, we did that on the way to Lindo Valley. Mindo. Mindo. Is it Mindo? Mindo. There's an M, yeah. Oh, I didn't know that.

Did you just trust us to plan the thing? Yeah. Yes, literally. We had no information. That's usually my, I'm like, whatever they say, I'm doing it. This is why Sarah's such a wonderful partner. I just go, this is all the things we're doing. And she's like this, all right.

Except for Adel. She always shuts the door there. Yeah, I just shut it down. Let's talk about that. Let's do that. Let's dedicate 30 minutes to this. Ha ha ha ha. I was worried about Joe's eating.

Well, I'm good in a foreign country. Yeah. This is my thing with diet. It's all comfort and ease. Like I've eaten whale and sushi and a pussy and ass and cum. But whatever, reindeer, all the stuff. Like I went to Peru, I told that story too. Like I brought spaghetti to warm up

and then when we got there, there was like a Sherpa making food and I was like, well, I can't just bust out a spaghetti. So I will eat. It's just at home, I'm like, let me just hit reorder and get a chicken parm. If you give me food that I have no other options. You have no choice.

You will be okay. People get a reputation because you did something three times out of 10 million times and people are like, well, that's your thing. Yeah, yeah, no, it is my thing. I like spaghetti. Most places offer a hamburger. You got that straight that's your thing. Yeah, yeah, no, it's my thing. I like spaghetti. Most places offer a hamburger.

You got that straight. Amarguesa. Yeah, amarguesa. Which we ate. Amargueso or sin queso. We ate in a little square in Mindo. We ate at like a little food place and I ended up getting like a cheeseburger. It was delicious. Yeah. And there was a dog.

We had a dog incident. Yeah, I was really taken by one dog and then he kind of turned. And then you realize like, oh, the dogs are grifters too. They're like men. They're cupboard lovers. They only love you because you got food. It wasn't like we had a deep connection.

There's Sarah trying to bounce the egg. Yeah, right, I love you for a minute. This is her trying to bounce an egg. This is one to watch for sure. Also send me your pictures later. I'll try to put some of these in. But there's not gonna be much of this. Oh yeah, we have some good gondola.

Sky gondola. Yeah, we gotta get, we have so many good things to get to. So you gotta balance an egg on a nail. They say you can do it right on the equator line. Cause it doesn't pull one way or the other. Yeah, I didn't even try. That's the kind of thing that I'm like. Yes you did too.

Did I? Yes. Did we get it? I don't even remember. I think there'd be some cheering. Yeah, I think there'd be some cheering if somebody got it, right? I definitely didn't do it.

I can't imagine that there'd be no cheering if somebody got it. It must be some, oh. Nice. You did it. Oh yeah, you gotta do that. You gotta hump it. Look at that thing.

Look at that egg. I don't think I, I definitely wasn't successful. I thought you were going in on your. Yeah, look. That's two eggs. Huevos. Yeah, we went and got eggs. And then I go, you know we have eggs.

So if it falls, it goes in that little rock thing, it doesn't break. Right. Wow. Well nice job. I don't really remember doing that. It's kind of thing that just frustrates me and I'm like this is gay let's get out of here. Somewhere we have a slow motion of you and I jumping sides. Yes. Oh nice boomerang. Oh yeah that's right. You put the boomerang boomerang. There we are. Hold on, I'll go back to it.

Okay, so we finished this. We finished this. Got some coffee on both sides of the equator. Send me that video of you guys jumping over the slow motion same time crossing equator. Yeah. And then I remember people being impressed with my ups actually.

I was. What are your ups? His hops? His eye kicks? That's a black basketball term. Hops, ups. You actin' a fool. Handle.

Damn. I'm stupid. You need to be smack, yo. Stupid. I'm stupid. So okay, so we went from here. No, stupid is good in the black community. Yeah.

You stupid. And then retarded is like extra cool. That's the best, yeah. Let's get retarded in here. So then we left Mitado Mundo, we went straight to Mindo. Mindo. Did we stop? I'm trying to think.

We did eat at like, I got seafood and I remember being like, should I get seafood in a place that's not near water? Should you get seafood in a place that's not near water? That's usually like my go-to rule of anything that's landlocked or far away from fresh seafood, then I don't get it. Okay, but here's what I figured out on this trip. Usually. I will, sometimes I'll.

In the playas, there is- But lime juice kills everything. Salmon and shrimp fisheries. So they're not even getting it from there. They're just right next to the water. Okay. So it's like, you're always getting them grown. Right.

You know what I mean? Unless it's like organic or whatever. Hold on, I wanna look at this fucking map. Boom and boom. Oh, look at that. Oh, what a mess. That ADHD desktop. That is triggering. That, what a mess. That ADHD desktop. That is triggering.

That's a mental disorder. Sarah wants 90 minutes in this house alone. Well, this is how you live your life, by the way. I remember you came to Key West. Oh, we saw this in Ecuador, too. It blew my mind that you travel this way. And Key West is like this, too. It's like you unzip your suitcase and dump it in the hotel.

And it's a one night only. And spread it around with no order. I saw you in Key West, you had been there for 10 minutes and it looked like this. I was like, what the fuck are you doing? And then it takes five hours for you to leave and you have to bring everything that you've purchased. I think there's a word for this, it's called Jew.

You had a plant, you had your wandering Jew. Didn't you have a wandering Jew with you? Isn't that the name of the plant? There is a plant. Yeah, I brought one back. I actually don't know how to save it when I leave. It's from the jungle and I really wanna save it. The way you save it is you make an emissions plant

and then you just have it work there. Schindler's List. Oh. That's how he saved the Jews. What? He made like a plant where you make stuff and then he employed the. Yeah, like buttons.

Yeah. Buttons. Buttons. Anyways, I thought that was good. This is our, from Quito to Mindo. Okay, so this is the route. Oh, the ride, the car that was good. This is our from Quito to Mindo. Okay, so this is the route. Oh, the ride, the car ride was fucking crazy. So this is the route.

So we went up and over, went to middle of the world. It's so funny. It's how the mundo and then drove over here. So this is supposed to be a two hour ride. I learned early on in Ecuador, these Google maps have almost no relation to time. Oh, is that right? It was probably six.

Sometimes it's just like you're not making it in what you're doing. Right. I remember the ride being spectacular. Yeah. And that's all I really remember. A lot of good vegetation. Also a lot of, we're like, not that I think it's third world Ecuador,

but you're definitely like, huh, apartments are being built here and there's car dealerships and regular stores and gas stations. We stopped at a lot of gas stations. I think what it is is like, if it's not to your little Anglo aesthetic, you assume that it's a dump, but you're like, it's actually not.

Your version of these places like grass skirts, right? Everyone grass skirts. And then you're like, what? Yeah, car dealerships is a good vibe of it. Why wouldn't they have that? You're like, I don't know. I just assumed that. Hawaiian.

They're brown. They steal them from America and then bring them over the border. If I ever meet Trump, I'm gonna say, hey, can you, you know how people wanna influence him? I'm gonna say, hey listen, if you ever referred to Latin America and you're not into it, just say, if it's brown, flush it down.

That seems like something he would say. It does, right? I think I convinced him. I couldn't convince him of a lot. He would preface it a lot. He'd be like, I'm gonna get in trouble. They told me I shouldn't say this, but I like to be naughty.

I saw it on a bumper sticker. If it's brown, flush it down. I didn't mean to say it. So we went up just to see this. If we took that out, where we have gone, same fucking route. So we're going right by there. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Okay. We have to go by it. I mean, you have to go. The in between, you have to if you're there. Right, it's weird to come all the way to the middle of the world. It's just, don't be an asshole. The other hemisphere. It's like if you're there. Right, it's weird to come all the way to the middle of the world.

It's just don't be an asshole. The other hemisphere. It's like if you're somewhere so close to something amazing, just don't be an asshole, just go see the thing. Well, this is my big thing, and I've talked about this a lot, and I saw Burt post about this recently, and I couldn't agree more, is that people give you shit,

you're one of these people, by the way, that's like, fucking don't act like a tourist, you wanna do the thing, but I'm like, but I am a tourist. And I wanna see the thing that everyone wants to see. Like you go to Paris, you should go to the Eiffel Tower. I have to check it out. People are like, I wanna live like a local, and you're like, why, I'm not a local.

80 episodes of me saying do the thing. As saying he's not right. Right, but you've also do, you know what I'm talking about. You do a whole thing of like, oh, you're gonna. Yeah, you pipe your shirt up to here, get your fucking monograms or whatever, binoculars, and like, let's go out and see the city with your propeller hat.

I don't mean that. With his big map. Just sweep Harry, what? With his big old map. With his big map, his undoing. I go anywhere, I travel, I go every, I free fall, free form. I've been everywhere, Doug. Yeah. Now we have a damn baby. Oh yeah.

We're taking him everywhere. Yeah, we're taking him. Okay, so, so okay. Here's you doing this. So then we got to Mindo. And why did we go to Mindo? Just because it seemed cool and we've been wanting to go there. You'd wanted to go there.

It's a cloud forest. I think you, yes. Didn't you just find an Airbnb that looked great? Wasn't it though? Why did we go to Minda just because it seemed cool and we wouldn't want to go there. You'd wanted to go there. It's a cloud forest. I think you, yes. Didn't you just find an Airbnb that looked great? Wasn't it though? It was great. It was spectacular, the best house ever and we gotta give a shout out

because this is the favorite. The landlord lady was like, please tell all your friends and we're like this, zero of our friends are coming to this place. Right. We were like on a horse farm, a thousand miles from nowhere

and she's like, tell some friends. I'm like, I don't know who you think is coming to this place. You know what, I'm gonna lay in an ad. Guys, remind me, YMH, Neon, remind me, I gotta do an ad for this lady's Airbnb. Today's episode of UB Trippin' is brought to you by the Mindo Ecochalet and Mindo Equator. Guys, if you're looking for a cloud forest to go visit,

why not go visit the one in Ecuador, the I went to it's amazing it's got all sorts of birds in fact it's been a that's pretty loud it's got the one the bird watching championships like seven years running it's got a crazy variety of birds in fact right in the Mendo Ecochalé is a hummingbird feeder where they just come one after another after another you can set up an amazing slow motion video with a clamp if you want. I've got crazy videos that you can use to impress your friends. It's one of the best air bees I've ever stayed at.

The only one I've ever stayed at with a horse and a waterfall right there within walking distance and a creek that runs right through the property. But don't take my word for it. Listen to what popular chinless comedian Joe List has to say. Hi, it's me, Joe List, and I'm here at a rental house in Boothbay Harbor, Maine, my favorite place in all of the earth, and it's a wonderful house,

but not nearly as nice as the house I stayed at in Mindo Valley, Ecuador. Of all the places I've had uncontrollable, unfathomable, unstoppable diarrhea, that is the best place I've ever been for it. In fact, next time I get uncontrollable, uncanny, don't know what that word means, diarrhea, I'm heading straight to Echoador

to stay in that house. And that horse, I think, would probably eat my diarrhea as long as it hadn't escaped. Well said, Joe. Another thing Dominique offers of the Ecochalet is a tea kettle where you can heat up your water to beyond boiling so you won't have projectile diarrhea the way Joe List did. Now, room enough for eight people, six beds and three bedrooms and one and a half baths. That half bath will be for the diarrhea for the people

who won't use the tea kettle for some reason. It's an Ecochalet because it's solar powered. The whole place is solar powered. It's pretty amazing. Legitimately, guys, one of the most tranquil places I've ever been. Smoking a cigar on the balcony, looking out at that giant yard with the hummingbirds right there. I mean, it just thinking about it brings me back.

And Dominique will also set up a bird watching tour for you if you want to see a toucan, which I did. And if you want to see some other birds, which we didn't. The Mindo Eco Chalé by Dominique. Click on the link and make yourself a reservation and go visit one of the most magical places I've ever been. Legitimately, it's amazing. Plus, no diarrhea for me.

Thanks, Dominique. I appreciate it. And if you end up staying there, legitimately, just send us a picture or something. What a fabulous place. Put the link in. Put the link in. Put the link in for a reservation if you want. Oh, way to get away. Plus if you're a comedian you get canceled for saying the wrong joke and that's the place to get away from it. Short walk

into town too. You're right there in Mendo. You're right there. You're like 10 minute walk away from Mendo with some of the best empanadas you could ever have. God, it makes me miss it. Legitimately makes me miss it just thinking about it. The Mendo eco chalet, get there today. Hummingbirds, tranquility, anything you want. Plus Bandit loves it. I'll see you on the other side. Now back to the episode.

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It was unbelievable. It was a really great Airbnb. It's the coolest Airbnb I've ever been to. Finding it was something. Was it an A-frame? I think so. We have a photo in front of it. Yeah, yeah, it had a big wraparound porch,

and then you had to get spiders in your boots, you had to be careful with the boots. It was a cabin kinda. Yeah yeah giant yard in the front i like our room giant yard and then a little creek creek you could go swimming crystal water and a horse and a horse that we would get to even finding it was like down dirt roadsie yeah stuff like it's off the city itself of mindo is nothing much also it's always fascinating when you're like, what is a German lady doing here? Oh, she was German.

Do you think she? Fucking. No, maybe escaped. Nazi, yeah. Oh, why go to Argentina? Everyone's going to Argentina. I wanna do something different. Yeah.

I'll hide out here. She was like 50. She was really nice to you, Ari. I'm really sorry for anything wrong, here or otherwise. She really did make amends. She really did. It was a little awkward at first, but later. I don't need my Jewish version of 40 acres on this.

You got me. You know what I didn't realize for like 20 years, of the Seinfeld nut? The soup Nazi, it ends with Newman going, he's taking all his soups, he's moving to Argentina. I never put it together. Just now. Yeah.

Isn't that funny? It's crazy. You're such a huge Seinfeld fan. I mean, just as a kid. I just never realized the joke. Because it's like in passing, and then when I was a kid, I didn't realize the Nazis went to Argentina.

It just felt like a funny thing to say. You ever see something that you realized as a kid and didn't understand it, and then as an adult, you would've, but you never revisit it in your head? Yeah, I had that with the abortion scene in Dirty Dancing where I was like, who's this guy she met in an alley?

And then it wasn't until I was older, I was like, oh, she had an abortion. I was like, why is there, how come we're not talking about this guy with a knife? And even though once you were an adult, you still can remember the scene, but then you're like, didn't do the math. I didn't do the math. I didn't do the math.

I was just like, what a weird moment that was in Dirty Dancing. Yeah. Rogan and I were walking into Tempe Improv once, and he mentioned the Doobie Brothers. Joe Rogan? Joe Rogan, yeah. Yeah, okay.

And he was like, yeah, it's about weed. I was like, oh, do they sing about weed? He was like, what? Like, did the Doobie Brothers sing? Did the Doobie Brothers sing about weed? And I was like, oh, I never, when I heard Doobie, I didn't know what that was. I thought they were actual Doobie. I thought it was Doobie Doobie Brothers sing about weed? And I was like, oh, when I heard Doobie, I didn't know what that was. I thought they were actual Doobie.

I thought it was Doobie Doobie Doo. Yeah, I didn't realize that either because they suck. I don't know anything about them. Wobobobo. Riders of the Storm? That's not them. No, that's the Doobie Brothers. Michael McDonald, right?

What's your big one? Wobobobo. No, that's something else. I don't know, they suck. Yeah. They're great. Whatever. Whatever you guys think. Well, we're going to Yacht Rock.

Oh yeah. Yeah, we try to get you guys to go, but you're out of town. I do love Yacht Rock. Oh damn. It's a good vibe. Okay, so now Mindo. Mindo.

There's Bandit. That's when we, she made us wear those boots. Look how gorgeous that is. She made us wear boots that we didn't end up needing. And they were too big and loose. Didn't it create the worst? The lady, the lady whose place it was? Yeah, yeah.

It gave me the worst plantar fasciitis that I've ever had from walking in those shoes. It was fucking horrible. She's like, you all need boots. You're gonna need boots. And we had brought hiking boots. She's like, those won't do. Everything's wet.

It was even rainy. There was no arch support. I was just flat, flat foot walking. Yeah, it was just flat and slippery. And we went on a hike. That was a hike. It was like a six mile hike with rubber fucking boots on for no reason.

Wow, she did have, that's right, she, oh, I still got that, there's that backpack. Yeah. That makes sense. We bought binoculars. Oh yeah, we bought binoculars. To see the animals. We have so much great stuff to get to. We're going to remember the bird thing, the gondola thing.

Look at us wearing masks in the middle of the air. And there, we're 35,000 feet. Hold on. Can I just say this also? Comedy Key West represent, yeah. Also, the mask, once you have it on, you've just adapted to having the mask like it's just on your face. You stop thinking about it. Yes. That is a defense. I was in Egypt and the guy was like I got into a cab put my seatbelt on the guy was like you don't have to wear seatbelts here it's pretty

much for gay people and I was like okay and he goes and I'm like okay and he goes so take it off and I was like oh really okay this is more work to take it off. And I was like, all right. Yeah, you did whatever. I mean, I am like embarrassed by this. I wanna fix this. This was by the way, the most terrified I've ever been in my life.

Absolutely. And then you get on the other side and it's just like a guy doing this. Pedaling it out for you. And I don't know, how many feet were we? It was in a drop. It was so high up. It was like 450 feet,

cause I remember making the analogy of home plate to like the outfield wall, but in vert, like. It also started like, oh, it's not that bad. And then it cut over a ridge and the ridge just drops and you're way higher. Yes, so. If you're above treetops, it's fucking crazy. Yes, well, that's what I meant to say.

It's 400 feet above the tree line. Look at our band photo. This rules. No masks. It's for a picture. I'm gonna tell you, I had the worst traveler's diarrhea on this trip. Not the worst.

Bit on his hike. You didn't have the worst. Of my life. Of my life. Okay, because you didn't even have the worst of the group. There were moments I was getting sweat and I was like, am I going to shit my pants? But there were some bathrooms we found, Cause you didn't even have the worst of the group. There were moments I was getting sweat and I was like, am I going to shit my pants?

But there were some bathrooms we found, the most crudest bathrooms ever. I would have been fine if you shit. That's the smile of somebody holding it in. Yeah. Right there, someone like. If you had shit your pants, you would have been the second woman to shit her pants

in front of me in South America. That's right. Pretty impressive. Brutal, it was so, that pain that you get and then the heat wave. I had to stop. It was just like a waterfall hike. Didn't we go from waterfall to waterfall?

This was the only long real hike we did. Yeah, in these wellies. What a terrible, right here. I was actually really annoyed that that was our suggestion. We should have brought shoes in our bags and then just put on regular boots. Well, and we flew fucking 1500 miles with hiking boots, which is never convenient, and then she's like,

you can't wear those, you gotta wear these. And then we ended up being like. These with no arch support. But also, I wanna go back to the gauntlet thing, because I'm not afraid of height. Hold on, this is gonna be on the way back. But also I wanna go back to the gondola thing because I like, I'm not afraid of heights. Hold on, it's gonna be on the way back. But. I just get.

Sorry. I'm not afraid of heights but like it was bottomless. It was like a grate so like you could see down. You would lightly kind of swing. And then on the way back it was raining. We're gonna have some other pictures of this right? Yeah I have photos of our feet looking down. But it did when it was an optical illusion.

When you're getting on, it looked like, and I remember thinking, I don't know if I can fucking do this, because it went straight up, and you thought, I thought it ended there, and it was fucking long. It was like 30 minutes long, and we're 400 feet above the treeline, and it was shaking and rocking, and on the way back, it started raining, got windy, and it stopped for like 15 minutes.

I like mid-fear though, it was, did we pass a family? Yes, they were like laughing, they were like on their way home from work. With like a baby in there. With a baby, everyone's having a good time, the baby's hanging on, doing pull-ups, doing parkour. Also, you're an animal abuser who brought the dog who's freaking out, so it's also like

a wiggly fucking dog. Dog's freaking out. Dog wants to get out immediately. That was a mistake. That was horrifying. Worth it though, cause check it out. She's loving it. Yeah, Banna was really great. Banna loves nature.

I'm just, I'm thinking about my diarrhea. You're squeezing it in. I'm just looking off into space like, oh my God. Yeah. Look at the pristine water. It really was great. I wanted to go swimming, but it actually was cold. Yeah, oops.

That's the bummer about mountain water. Yeah, it's very cold. Joe always does a thing. It was in Zion, where you dunk your head. Yeah, I loved dunking my head. I love a head dunk. And I like to fill the hat with water, too Yeah, and then put it on there. Let it dry. God damn. Yeah, very spiritual. I mean the place was really naturey Oh, it was spectacular. It was fucking incredible. Let's stick on this photo

Like a big that leaf is oh Yeah There it was just real jungle, it's cloud forest, which I've never heard of before. Yeah, I hadn't really either. I guess it's like a pre-rain forest. And they say that the bird watching champions of the world all come from Mindo every year because it's got the most diverse.

I hate diversity. Yeah, if you wanna hear something fun. Yeah. My friend works at the forest department and all their emails are bouncing back if they mention biodiversity. Oh. Because fuck wit, it's so against diversity.

You can't even scientifically say biodiversity. They're like, well, how are we supposed to get the fuck around this? That's so funny. I just don't understand why we're. What is this a video? Oh there's the trash. Is this your promo?

There's the trash with the toilet paper. Can I also tell you the wifi was pretty decent. I was able to do a Zoom comedy show. Really? That's right you did a set one of the nights. Oh yeah. Yeah we were downstairs. That was the night by the way I think.

We were downstairs. It all started. Playing cards. We played a lot of scat and he's about to show you his scat. Oh, there's poop in there! Yeah. I didn't know that video was happening. Are you telling people they come to go bananas?

I can't be promoting anything. I might be promoting an episode of Old Skeptic Tank. Well, this is about to get the Skeptic King pump. We played a lot of scat and then we went out and bought cigarettes. Yeah. Sarah and I, when we're in another country, we get cigarettes and smoke them. I played a lot of scat and then we went out and bought cigarettes. Yeah. When we're in another country, we get cigarettes and smoke them.

I love it. Sarah smokes them. I pretend to smoke them. It was fun. That's right. We smoked on the porch there. Yeah. We went into like a equivalent of a bodega.

I don't think we want to play some of these. Where we also had those. Oh, those are nice. Oh, and hummingbirds. We had a ton of hummingbirds come to us. Oh, the hummingbirds were the same. Yeah, same shirt. Oh, wow.

Same shirt. Yeah, we, same shirt. Same shirt. Yeah, we smoked Hoyos, we smoked those Ecuadorian cigars. That weren't good, I don't think. I did Marlboro's. No, but they were there, I got used to them. I really liked my cigarettes. What'd you get? I went and bought a pack of cigarettes.

I think they were Ecuador brand. Yeah, I mean they weren't gonna be great. I liked it. Can I also, I don't know if we're gonna get to it, but I think about that to this today, I think I had one of the best meals ever when we were by the river and the empanadas that were made from scratch and we played cards

and had coffee and it was all like $7. We sat on the edge of a valley, it was like a food truck, not a food truck, it was like a little stand. It was like a hut kind of. It was set, but like, yeah, and it was also taking forever, like what's taking so long? She's like, I'm making it from scratch.

Yes, I had to go to the grocery store. And we sat and played. I didn't know four people were gonna come. Yeah. We sat and played scat for hours, which is my favorite activity. How do you play scat? Scat is 31, it's like they're playing in Stand By Me.

You get three cards and you discard and you wanna get 31. Scat, I gotta remember this for Hostels. Yeah, yeah, we played a lot. I'm trying to make a list of like, okay scat. Which I was happy that I converted you guys. That was the best meal ever. It was so good, those empanadas.

And I've since been arepas. Arepas, it was arepas. It was fun to. Because we kept making jokes, of course. But when we've had, I remember leaving there being like, my new favorite food is arepa, and I haven't been able to re. A story had a decent place, arepa.

There's like an arepa lady. No, I remember ripping that lady. Yeah, that was brutal. That was a weird part of the trip. I really held her down, but oh boy. Brutal, you can't say but oh boy. Brutal. You can't say brutal on that. It was brutal.

All right. It was a crime. When you're out of focus, you're kind of handsome. Yeah, right? It takes away the ghoulishness. So it was one of the cool things about Ecuador. In Quito, there is a Casa de Habana, and you can find legit Cuban cigarsars and I would when I was there.

No, it was awesome. I also remember the horse. I was terrified of the horse. I hate screenshots. Nothing worse than screenshots when you're going through a fucking. Well, they're not gonna show all this. We're just gonna show the ones we paused on.

Oh, that's later. That's later. Okay, so wait, so let's talk about Mindo. So let's not leave Mindo first. Mindo is the biggest part of our trip. Yes, we white water rafted, we got annihilated by mosquitoes. White water rafting! Yeah, yeah. Oh my God.

First of all, I love rehashing on a trip, podcast or not, and just remembering stuff as you go. We did a lot, and wait, remember before we went to the Sky gondolas, we ended up trespassing on somebody's property thinking that was the way to go. And what happened? Begley.

We didn't know how to get to the actual sky gondola. The gondolas took us up to the hikes. Yes. We were at like some, I wouldn't say rich person, but it was a nice home. They probably make 40 grand a year. Some of those homes up there were like, how much, they're building themselves,

it probably cost 50 grand. But they looked amazing with the craftsmanship and the architecture. I do remember because that's what we realized was, we were trying to follow maps to the trailhead, but we didn't realize there was a gondola necessary. So we kept trying to like find paths to get there. Yeah.

And there wasn't a path. It was a skip. Yes. Yeah. I was like, oh, let's just walk over it. Which would have been impossible. In the boots. It took a while to get to the head. Also on this, oh, so okay, we got a lot.

The hummingbird feeder on this. Amazing. Incredible. It was like 10 different kinds and colors and stuff. Yeah. It was incredible. It was. I took a slow-mo video where I just set up the thing and you just see it's still going pretty fast. They look like bugs.

They're the coolest animal on Earth. It's so weird. They're just like. Because they're like this. And they wanna go, they go. Someone else comes in, excuse me, and they go, okay. And then you were gonna get a hummingbird tattoo but you got that thing instead.

Yeah, I was. Big mistake. What's that one? This is the, it's a plant, helicuna. It's a plant that's all over there in the jungle that I really liked every time I saw it. It's on trees. It's in the tropics, but there's all these different genuses of it.

And you guys had been there for how long at this point? Like three months, two months? What day is this here? February, so we went Halloween, so all November, all December, all January, three and a half months. February, that's right, we came straight from QS. Yeah, I think you guys still had like another month left after we left.

We waited for the vaccine. Oh, I remember, this might get me in trouble, but I remember having my sister do my unemployment from America, because you couldn't do it through the IP address. You're not the only one. I was like, could you do that once a week for me? So I was living, that was why COVID was so great.

I was living, making the most money I've ever made in standup. Yeah. There was a couple times. That was a bum. On unemployment, where you got a raise because the economy was tanking. Yes, we got stimulus.

At some point Obama gave me an, he went from, you can only get 26 out of the 52 weeks. Yeah. And he goes, we're gonna only get 26 out of the 52 weeks, and he goes, we're gonna do 39 now, and I'm like, okay, this hasn't affected me at all, this 2008 thing hasn't affected me at all, and then he goes, extra 25 bucks a week. I'm like, thanks.

Yeah, and then Trump was like, 400, 600 for everybody. He'd go all year, everyone's like, nice. Oh, I was getting like a thousand a week or something ridiculous. Did you lose your job from COVID? From comedy. Oh, right, yeah. So somebody helped us set up how to do freelance

and it was, whoever did that is an angel. God damn. They showed you everywhere, they circled every page that what you had to press. Oh wow. Impressive. So we got there, we had a horse. Okay, so there was a horse next door.

Which that, I will admit, I was terrified. A horse is a horse, of course. Yeah, right, of course. Unless of course. Unless of course. Of course. Of course. Yeah. It's Mr. Ed.

Oh yeah, it is not. This was Mr. Ed. Yeah. Yeah. The horse ruled. No, I was terrified and then you were giving me shit and I'm like, it's a fucking wild animal that kicks things. It was our one warning.

Our one warning was don't let the horse. She's like, do whatever you want, you guys can all fuck, wife swap, come in my face. Have fun with the horse. Beat me. Go pet it in the morning. You just gotta wear the boots, but whatever you do, don't let the horse leave. Spin my mouth. And we were like, got it.

And I think we saw it out of our peripheral vision and it was one of those things like, did the horse just walk by the kitchen window? There's a horse in the front outside of his head? We're like, oh. Yeah, the horse got loose. I still don't know whose fault it was. Might've been mine, might've been yours.

It might've been mine too. I think it was you. Somebody, and it could've been me. Didn't latch. Just didn't latch, just like put, and the horse like, oh, oh, oh, we gotta latch that. The horse is waiting for that moment. Waiting for these tourists to come in and not latch. Yeah, four whites showed up and the horse was, oh, we've got a horse there. Oh, the horse is waiting for that moment. Waiting for these tourists to come in and not latch.

Yeah, four whites showed up and the horse was like, yes. This is my thing, wait, wait. Outta here. And then the Airbnb lady went to town to socialize. Yeah, she's like. So we were under a ticker. I was thinking the whole time we were. Was she on property?

She was in town. Yeah, she lived on property. She had another little house. Yeah. Nearby. But she left, yeah, she went. She left and then I remember, she was like, I'm going into town to meet my friend.

And so I, the whole time that we were trying to get this horse back, I, in my mind, I was thinking split screen. Of what she's doing while we're, and we're like, oh my god, oh my god, how much time left? She, how long do you hang out with a friend? Yeah.

And then it- Split screen is a good way to do it. And then she's like, I gotta get back there. And her friend's like, Bobby, I'll just get one minute. We're like, screen. Yeah. We had to chase this horse. You have pictures?

I think I have the video. I made a video with dance music to us chasing the horse. And there were several obstacles. I gotta see if I can find it. First there's different ways to get back to the house, different hidden trails. We would find it, chase it back to another area, and then we also had wild street dogs.

Oh my god. They were fucking terrifying. So the moment you thought you had the horse, then a street dog would show up and chase it more. And when you get close to the horse, horses, I don't know if anybody knows this, are actually incredibly fast. Yes, and they're huge.

They're huge, so you get close to them, like I've almost got it, and the horse's like, well you know. Yeah. I think you can race them if you have to. I'll trot away. I have like a four minute video that I put together, but I don't know what's on here,

and it won't fuckin' like upload, but this is when you first picked this up. But I'll find it. Oh, send all these though, but if you have one we should talk about. Oh, look at this, I have the whole fuckin' thing, a whole compilation. Wow, oh that's the balcony.

That's the rooftop thing. Wow. I mean everybody's in here, but. Yeah, yeah, I'll find it. I have one of just us chasing the horse though, but it's not in this fucking- Oh, you got a semi-old. I have to say that horse, it seemed like it was long,

but I think in the scheme of things, that took us 15 to 20 minutes to get that horse back. Yeah, but that's long. No, I think an hour plus. You think an hour plus? Because he ran into that yard at some point. Yeah. He went down the main road and we're like,

if he goes to the railroad, that's the road to town. We were in the car at one point. It was like 35 minutes at least. And when I say main road, the entire frame of this podcast is the size of the main road. Right, and it's mud. Uh-huh, and rocks.

And I mean like wild dogs. Like, no leash, no vet cone. Yeah. And it's like, well dogs can smell fear. Like, well they can smell a lot here. Yeah, there's a lot. They're all quite frightened. And then we each had a big long stick and we're trying to direct the fucking horse back.

We were just chasing a wild horse. But the best part was at the end when the horse went finally up the road of the house and it full charged Joe and I was like, he's a goner. And then at the last minute you opened the gate. It was horrifying. And it went right in and I was like, he's a goner. And then at the last minute you opened the gate. It was. And it went right in and I was like, oh my God. We got Joe make sure he doesn't go past you.

And I was like. And Joe's like, okay. It was fucking charging me. I had a Mustang charging me with a stick being like, go, come on, please. And then he turned and we just fucking whipped the gate shut and all breathed a sigh of relief. And then we had a long debate, and I'm a good boy,

of whether or not we should tell the landlord, the lady. I said no. I think I'm in the back. It's back. Yeah, it's Sarah and I summed up as people. Sarah's like, no, let's just leave. And I was like, we have to tell her. Why?

We had to tell her if it was still out. Oh, I think because we also saw, people saw us. Yes! Chasing a horse. I was like, the townspeople are gonna be like, by the way, there was four assholes chasing your horse around town. And then we looked like assholes.

Hey Deb, you got someone staying at your house? We noticed some whites. So we did tell her and she was like, oh no problem. But we played it off. We were like, he went down there, but we got him back. So she was like, oh, whatever. Yeah, we didn't tell him that. We fucking already rode the thing back.

Why don't you have a horse? But after that happened and the relief of getting the horse back, there was a part of me that was like, that was so much fun. Yeah, Sarah wanted to release that kid. It was so much fun. So much fun that I was like, I could do that every day. So much, and we chased it into this other guy's yard.

Remember that? Some like, some like. Yeah, we went to other houses. It was like a tree farm or something. Yeah. It was like, sorry. Yeah, it was, but like a, it was like a tree farm or something. It was like, sorry. Yeah, it was, but after that it was smooth sailing. No more problems after that. Well, we went on a bird.

It's a bird, like, I don't know what the word is, a center of birding. The Mendo River Valley. Oh yeah. That was the last day. Set up a bird tour. The night before, unfortunately. Yeah. So the night before I was like, let's have a cup of tea. The night before, unfortunately. Yeah, so the night before, I was like,

let's have a cup of tea, let's all drink tea. And now, oh, this is the other important thing to say, is that all week, the whole trip, leading up to the trip, you kept saying, whatever you do, don't drink water, you have to boil the water. Yeah. Make sure it goes to a boil. And it has to fully boil.

Boil. I kept going to drink the water, and then you'd be like, no, no, no, no, no, no, and slap it out of my hand. It was a lot of close calls. I got my diarrhea from the toothbrush situation. Yes, so Sarah got- Water bottle, water bottle.

So mine was light, mine was light. Sarah got a little diarrhea from brushing her teeth. It was pretty intense. And then- That's just a couple drops. A couple. Touching her gums. Yes, where I could hold it between my butt cheeks.

Yeah. Oof. Then you, like hold it between my butt cheeks. Yeah. Then you, like she does with my gum. Did you? But farts were out of control. Yeah, very farty. Just very, yeah. So then the second to last. Is that last night?

Yeah, it must have been the last night there. It was kind of the last night. Last night in Mindo. In Mindo, yes. So then we, I made a cup of tea. Now I'm a tea cunt and green tea, you're not supposed to bring it to a boil. It's supposed to be about 175 degrees.

So I made sure. It, it, so anyone listening out there, I get it, if you want your ideal temperature, bring it up to a boil, then down to 175. Right. That's what I was thinking. Gay. Not Joe.

So I was like, oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. So then I drank a fucking mug of local water and I started to feel a little bit, we went to bed, we brushed our teeth, we said good night. I think I did my Zoom show. I laid down. You did a nice comedy show. I did my little comedy show.

And before bed, I was like, I took a big shit that came on out of nowhere. I was like, that was weird. Oh well. And then I laid down, went to bed and like a movie, my eye, I felt it again gurgling and I just went, oh man, I just remembered. I had a 16 ounce glass of tea.

You drank straight diarrhea. So much bacteria. They were just like, these whites are amazing. The horse is like, right? I was fucking annihilated. Or do they get used to it? Or you all have to, okay. They don't drink it either.

There's water delivery systems. What's going on in there? What's happening in that water? What is it, Flint? Yeah, they don't have clean water. I don't know. Is it all, is it pollution or is it just, they're like beavers?

I've heard that with like, even if you're surviving in the woods and you come across a stream that looks clean You shouldn't drink it because there's also bacteria. Yeah. Yeah, it's only some I remember in Alaska Like this one. Yes, that one right next to it. You have to drink groundwater in order to get Yeah Well, anyways, we went on the bird thing. We set up the big bird thing which we're excited about in the morning, Is that right?

Really? It was so early. Oh, I get there for sunrise because that's when the birds come out. Yes. And then we thought you made a fucking, we had an observation that- It was like a five hour bird.

It still makes me laugh that we saw a bunch of chickens and roosters running around and you're like, if we weren't, if you weren't familiar, you'd be like, oh my God. Look at that giant bird. That's the best bird. Oh my God, it's huge. It's got this like neck thing.

That's crazy. That one screams. Oh my God. But we're just like kicking them, being like, get out of here. We're trying to look at cool birds. Beat it, dork bird. We wanted the toucan.

Yes. Which is so funny because it's like, toucan's cool and all, but is it really that? Are we, like we. It's got its own cereal. Yeah, we get, it's like Toucan's cool and all, but is it really that? Are we, like we? It's got its own cereal. Yeah, we get, it's a get. It's a get. Yeah, it's a get.

Oh, my cigar is coming out. But once we saw the Toucan, I think we were like, we're done. This lady was so into birds. She loved it. Yeah, there are people that are just. We had binos, we were up there. She's like, we're gonna see all these things.

We also suspected she was a lesbian. She was a lesbo, for sure, for sure. I just love where, what's it like being a lesbian in the middle of the cloud forest? She was very, very dyke-y. And we saw a guy in a tiny town off a dirt road, we were out of gas, we were like, oh, we gotta find gas. We saw a guy in a tiny town off a dirt road, we were out of gas, we were like, oh, we gotta find gas.

And we went to a town of like 80 people, and somebody working in the convenience store was so gay, like bleached blonde hair. Were we there for that? No. Oh, okay, I was there. And it was like, coming across a gay in a backwards town like that,

and they're like, what are you listening to? He's like, gaga. And we're like, okay. I'm like, I wonder if he even knows. You're like, what are you listening to? It's like, gaga. And we're like, okay. I'm like, I wonder if he even knows. You're like, are you- Are you the only gay? Yeah, what's dating like for you out here? Hope in a traveling comes through looking for gas.

Right. And you get fucked behind the, oh, my damn cigar's coming apart. I always thought it was, we stopped our trip early and we dropped her off. And she was like, well, I'm gonna just continue. Yeah, we were like, all right, we saw the toucan, we gotta get going on the road.

She couldn't, there was a language barrier too and it was supposed to be like a five hour tour. We were like 45 minutes in and I was, at that point I was shitting my pants. I had begun my. You farted in front of her. I did? No, Ari did.

He ripped a huge... Wow. One non-comic gets a comic. She smiled. She's like, no, I, you know. Did you do the light, like, cool? We saw the toucan. We saw a few toucans.

It was pretty fucking cool. Yeah, it was cool. And we looked at the big... Two kids were great. We took photos through the telescope, which was cool. Yeah, she had a cool viewfinder. Yes, and we just released her so early. We're like, we're good.

She goes, no, no, there's a little sparrow you gotta see. We're like, mm. Does it have a color for a beak? Like, I don't wanna see, I don't give a shit about black birds. It's migrating right now. It's only one week a year, you can get a fucking New York pigeon here.

Yeah, if it's not in a cereal box, I'm not interested, lady. And then I had to double back and shit in like the dirtiest shit hole. It's like where the kids hid in Schindler's List, second Schindler's List reference. I shit on a kid's head. And then I was like, guys, I'm fucked.

You were beat. And we had like a three hour car ride back to wherever we were going. That car ride was hard. We're going to Quito, so we're doing that reverse of that, right? You were flying out of Quito. Yeah, we were.

Yeah, and we also had to get a COVID test. Yes, we had to go get tested to get out of the country. To get on the plane, yeah. Yes, because we were about to do the nice part of Quito. And they did have a pretty decent system set up for getting those COVID tests. Yeah, that was another thing of like, you can, if it's not to your Anglo-white aesthetic,

you just assume it's shitty, but you're like, they were on time and it was run perfectly. It may have been concrete that was slightly wet, but it worked. I was having an anxiety attack though, because it was like, you gotta get it, and it was was language barrier.

I think we were flying out the next morning. Yeah, thank God your friend was very fluent in Spanish. I can do a little Spanish, but not enough to explain it. But also it's like, if it doesn't come, I have a flight. What if I don't get it? What if it's not? And they're like, chill bro, chill. Unsettling trying to figure that out and navigate, and I had to shit my brains out every 30 seconds

and we went to 10 gas stations. The drive back was so wild because it was like hey I gotta stop at this gas station for to shit, I'm like oh this aren't gonna be a good one. But I can get a coffee, okay sure. And then like. It was every 10 minutes. And then like it was like oh wow, how was the shitting at the gas station?

You're like, terrible. And then like, and then you don't have toilet paper, you gotta flood, it's like, oh, they don't clean it. And then like 10 minutes later, you're like, hey, I know this is a joke, but I gotta shit again. I would get back in the car. Can you imagine, right? And be like, go to the next gas station.

I also remember your friend, because it's shitting and we're comics, that's all we could talk about, was like, is that all you guys talk about? And I was like, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Do you guys want some Ecuadorian chocolate? You have some? Yeah, Picari. I gave some to my mom, but I don't think she cared for it. Sure, is it regular chocolate? Yeah, that one's got chili in it, that one's got. Chili in it? That one's got. Chili in it? That one's got Ovea.

I'll be shitting my pants again. Ovea, you should go, you don't like spicy, right? Child. I'm okay. You want it? Yeah. Crack it? Yeah.

Okay. I'm good. Okay, great, well. How many gas stations did you visit? I think, I honestly think 10. And it's like, picture shitting at a gas station on you visit? All of them? I honestly think 10. And it's like picture shitting at a gas station on 95 in Connecticut. Already terrible.

And how awful it is, yes. This was like Ecuador side of the highway and they were all just like holes. There was no door. There was no toilet paper. Wait, it was a squatter one? Yes, it was like fucking just holes. It was horrendous.

Most of the toilet I remember were holes. But I was sick enough that I didn't care. I was just sitting in Ecuadorian shit. I got to a hotel once in La Troncal, I think, El Troncal, and it was like, I wanted to take a shit at this not good hotel. It was like, we can't keep going overnight. And going to the guy, he's like,

hey, there's no seat on the toilet. He goes, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, and he went back behind the guy. He's like, here, bring it back. Yeah, weird. Yeah. Could you just, You want another one? Like, squat over?

You what? Did you need the toilet seat? Cause I would have squatted. Yeah, girls are, you have training in that. Oh, okay, okay. I'm like, no, I'm gonna sit down and shit. Okay. I thought it was odd that there's no seat on the toilet, on a regular toilet. Yeah. Yeah, there was a lot of them with no Oh, okay. Okay. I'm like, no, I'm going to sit down and shit. Okay. I thought it was odd that there's no seat on the toilet,

on a regular toilet. Yeah. Yeah, there was a lot of one, no seats. Yeah. It was, it was fucking bad. And I also felt bad cause it felt like I was such a hindrance to everybody. I'm like, I'm so sorry.

And then we were trying to race to make our appointment. Also that was the other thing. We got an extra three hours. We can take a hike. We can like maybe stop by me tell the moon again. We can like do whatever it gets. And then it was the other thing. We got an extra three hours, we can take a hike, we can maybe stop by Mitelda Mundo again, we can do whatever, get some nice food, and then it was like, nah. And this is the other thing, I don't know if this is

everybody or just me, but I get very emotional. I get raw when I'm that sick. Oh, every time you shit. No, but I was weak. Remember that time I got sick in Long Island? I was watching Home Alone, I was like sobbing. Joe got norovirus. I've had it a few times.

I gave it to him, mine wasn't that bad, and then his was, it was almost like he was kicking heroin in a hotel room, just shitting and vomiting. It's happened three times that you get like, Sarah gets sick and she's like, bloop, excuse me. And when you're opening the sheet. And then the next day I'm dying. Yeah. Yeah. You're open for Louie early on.

Yeah, that was the first time I ever met Louie. That was the same time. I'm sick, but I'll make it. He's like, don't come anywhere fucking near me. We were counting at like contractions. I was like, you're shitting every 30 minutes. I think you can squeeze in a feature set. I literally told Louie, I was like, okay, I'm doing 15.

I'm having diarrhea every 18 minutes. I don't want to miss the gig. And he was like, you don't fucking come to this. And then Jerry Seinfeld took my place. Because he was there. We also worry, we're like, that was never going to work again because timing does matter in these things. But you know what, Louie, he's like,

I know you wanted to do the gig, I'll make it up to you. And then we went on a world tour. He is a real comic. He gets that this is important. Yeah, well, cause some, like, have you ever had like, oh, now we're just talking about comedy. Oh, okay. Okay, yeah. Well, just like timing is everything

where you get something and then because you get sick, somebody loses their job and then they move on and you're like, okay, I guess I'm not getting that TV show anymore. Remember, you said I was on your radar? No. Well, I think that's because Seinfeld was there, I would have hung out with Seinfeld,

I would have done a set in front of Seinfeld. I was like, this could have been my big break and instead I shit all over the place and cried in a hotel room. I had one two weeks ago. I was gonna go, my friend used my fame. He had tickets, he has partial season tickets to Yankee Stadium and he goes,

can I use your fame to get stuff? I'm like, if I'm not there, okay, try, because it's embarrassing, because I'm not as famous as you think I am. And he goes, hey, I have a very famous friend, he wants, we want to get something extra, because he has like a rep. And they go, okay, we'll get you on the field

for batting practice, which is cool. And only I found out later. The Blue Jays game was awesome. Oh my God, I found out later, Shane got it for us at the Phill for batting practice. Which is cool. And only I found out later. The Blue Jays game was awesome. Oh my God. I found out later, Shane got it for us at the Phillies, but like, that's Shane. I found out later it was only because it was like right before the summer, day game, the Rangers,

no one gave a fuck. Right. But anyway, I was gonna do that. The night before, I got a text from SideSplitters going, Judge is coming to your show tonight. Oh, Aaron Judge. I was thinking Mike Judge. Yeah. And I was I was like I know my judge I can get you yeah because Judge Reinhold and it was like oh my god so I'm gonna perform for judge

make a joke and then the next day see him a batting practice we're gonna be best friends right there's no way he would have remembered oh 11 hours ago I saw you on stage he would have come up to me. Of course. Right. And then he didn't come. They had to cancel him and Goldschmidt had to free and then it's like, fuck, just, mm, friends. Your life would have been so different. I bet you could get in touch with Aaron Judge.

Through Shane. I met him through Shane. Shane was like, this guy wants to suck your dick. I'm like, Shane, come on, man. But I do. He thought me and Foley were like Shane's retarded friends who run the coffee shop. That's the problem when you're with somebody.

You're his wife. The judge made a beeline for Shane and then eventually Shane was like, oh, these guys also think you're cool. And I go, oh, hey. Yeah, and they just assume you suck. Yeah. That's the thing about comedy.

If they haven't heard of you, they're just like, well, you must blow. Yeah. Anyway, that's good. In your case, I do. I pull it together for specials, but that's it. Day to day though, I'm a pretty bad comic. So then, wait, where are we?

We get COVID tested, went smooth. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Because you said this before, in between cities in Ecuador is gorgeous. Oh yeah, you're going through like the best vegetation ever. And the mountains and the fucking, it's just like, it's just so cool. Now South America is the best.

It's so, it's gorgeous and nothing's built up. Like if we're on I-95 it's like ugh. Right. Right, I always picture, like they always say America is, isn't it, that's what it means, beautiful. Oh really? America the beautiful? Something like that. Okay. And you're like, it is, isn't it, that's what it means, beautiful. Oh really? America the beautiful? Something like that.

Okay. And you're like, it is, there's some really amazing stuff. Oh Amerigo. Yeah. But it could mean, I'm only going off of Ronnie Chang. Go ahead. Yeah, America means beautiful, yeah. Get all my info from Ronnie Chang's.

But like North America, but then when you go down there, you're like, well we don't have cloud fucking forests. No. With jaguars. Doesn't Lando Calarizian live in the cloud forest? Yeah, cloud, yeah. From Star Wars? Is that what you're thinking of?

No, it's a cloud forest, but maybe. But also possible. It also feels like a name of like a- And then we went to Hoth? Where Super Mario Land is, yeah. Oh, what about the rafting? We didn't do the rafting. Oh my God.

Yeah, we skipped the rafting, which was bad. That was really fun. That was really fun. It was a tube, describe it. We gotta have pictures, but describe it. But the mosquitoes. We got annihilated. I have never, I thought I was gonna get Zika. No, I posted the photo.

Well, first of all, everyone. And I was trying to get, we were trying to have a baby then too, that I was like, oh my God, what if I get pregnant and I have Zika? You have a mosquito baby. You definitely don't want a Zika baby. No. There's no positive instances of Zika baby.

But think about mine, I would get specials for my Zika baby. But this is, that's true, you'd be huge. But this is the thing though, and everyone acts like I'm some fucking, what do you call it, hypochondriac cunt. I posted the photo being like, look at all these bug bites. Every comment was like, you're gonna die, dude.

You're gonna get disease. I'm like, I think I'll be okay. Because I had had that in Peru too. Where you got, I had like 48. I had never experienced, you look down at your leg. That's why all the river guys were wearing leggings. Long sleeves, yeah that's right. We wore shorts and t-shirts.

The safety regulations on this rafting thing. It was like just tires, just tubes? Yeah, we went tubing. But they were all tied together. Whatever they put you in, forgot what they're called, whatever, doesn't matter. It was also like a foot and a half of water. Yeah, they're also like, hey, so your butt's in the two part,

your legs are hanging out, and they go, if your legs hang too low, they will get snapped off. Yeah. You're like, okay. So the whole time, we're like, having fun, but also like, ah, ah, ah, ah. No, it was actually quite scary, because a few times my foot, I'm like a lanky guy,

and my foot would drag on the bottom. I still have a lot of my butt. Yeah, he knew the river though, cause he would, he knew the spots to launch us. Was he on with us? Yes. Yeah, yeah, he was like the bottom. I got some on my butt. Yeah, he knew the river though, cause he knew the spots to launch us. Was he on with us? Yes. Yeah, yeah, he was like the guy. And then he would come off a little bit.

And push. Push and then get back on and like, You'd start spinning. Yeah. And it was like, one time he was going backwards. He was like an artist, a tubing artist. Yeah. And they would just put the tubes back in the truck,

go back up and two people down. It was only like eight minutes long. It was so fun. But it minutes long. It was so fun. But it was thrilling. It was really fun. It was awesome, it was a highlight for sure. It was worth the mosquito bites and the Zika baby. Yeah, that was the last day there,

and then that night was when I got poisoned. Oh yeah. Yeah, but I thought that was one of the main attractions of Mendo Valley was tubing, and I think we just decided on a, it wasn't like we planned on it. We were going to go hike and see the birds and whatever. And every truck had a big tube on it.

It's like big business there. Yeah. Every car has a tube. It's an adventure town. Yeah, yeah, yes. Mendo. But I think we were like, fine, whatever. And then we were like,

that was the most fun I've had in my entire life. I love a no safety regulations place. Yeah. Because it's like, you're going too far with the regulations. Let us have a little risk. Yeah. You can bring a baby on there. I'm sure you would let us have a baby on the tubing.

Oh yeah. It's your life. It's your funeral. Yeah, what are you guys gonna sue us? We don't have anything. I can't come down to keto and sue the tubing guy. Did we at all pay with any $2 bills? I don't remember.

I don't recall. What? I don't recall. Okay, forget it. So we get back to this, so then we take the drive, unless it was more rafting shit. No, I think that was it. No, I just did one rafting, where I could've done more.

What? I could've done more rafting. It was very, very fun. Yes. I was like, can we do an hour long tubing? Yeah, maybe a chiller place. Yeah. Like a lazy river.

Like a lazy river would have been great. You would have drank again for that. Yeah. So then we eventually made our way back to this tester place. Yes, and that was pretty easy. How was the bathroom in that place? I don't recall. I used it.

That was a good one. That was like a fucking flower at that point. I think my diarrhea had subsided at that point. Yeah, you didn't have any, you fucking shit one time on the hiking trail. Yeah. I shit 85 times. I drank a fucking gallon of local water.

It was a lot. It was, and I sipped it night. I was like, oh, this is just hitting right. Fucking horrible. Oh my God, what a fun trip. Yeah, it was amazing. And then we had a nice night back in Quito again, a different part of town.

We weren't in old town. We were in like regular town. So we went to this other hotel, right? It was like a more history, it was a millennial coded. It was a nice hotel. It was the cool part of town where they had the movie theater that we tried to get, Ocho Media.

Yes, we ate at the restaurant. That was really good and I can't even remember what I ate there, which is a bummer. The bandit came with us to the restaurant. You really should take photos of your food. I know people fucking. It was cold out. Get mad at you for doing that.

Yeah, but if it's foreign like this. Yeah, I'm like, come on, it's part of the experience. Yeah, whatever this, we're drinking. Joe, I like your hair. Look at all that cash, baby. Texture. Thank you. Oh, god, what a stupid face.

Look at that, I'm loaded, baby. Yeah, you are. Woo. That place was great. The place was great. And they gave us these ponchos because it was cold out. Yes, yes. Keto is extreme.

It's cold every night. It's on the equator pretty much. And it's just it didn't really change the temperatures goes rainy season dry season And then and then at night it gets like so cold and then we went after this we went to like a cafe bar They had like a dessert coffee. I think that's where we went. Oh look at Ben. Is this the cafe bar? Yes. Yeah, this is I'm sorry. This is a That's where we went. Aw, look at Bandit. Is this the cafe bar? Yes. Yeah. This is, I'm sorry, this is a, this is the cafe outside the movie theater. Yeah, yeah, that's right. Oh, Bandit rules.

What a fuck. Oh my God. She really ponied up to me. That was, whatever you say. She liked you. Cuddled up, whatever. Yeah. No mask.

Well, that's sort of a mask. Genuine chocolate face, no makeup. Borat, let's take a moment of gratitude to Borat. What a film. Yeah, it really was. Why does it go back to that? My hand looks like, it looks like I have a little baby hand. Yeah, this looks like.

Why does my left hand. Like a claw. Like a claw. This looks like AI'd. The fuck is my hand? One's tiny, one's huge. You look at, on the bottom hand looks like the hot dog fingers from everywhere all at once.

Sounds like fingers. That was spectacular. At this point I had recovered. You even ate, you're like, all right, at this point you go, no, I'll get the regular food. Let's get the regular food. Yeah, I was ready. I had shed it.

It was about 10 hours of fucking horror. That meal was great and not much. But you're right, the arepas, all that stuff, they have these amwearsas, these pre-fixed lunches, and they're 250 across the country. Yeah, well I even liked my seafood dish I had at that gas station on the way to the equator or when we left.

Sarah's like, I had horrible diarrhea, but my seafood at the gas station was awesome. I don't know what happened to this diarrhea. It was a shrimp soup. It was very delectable. I think that might be it from my pictures. Oh, I have so many. When was the video?

I don't think I took many photos when we got into, only because that new town, as much as it was cool, it just felt very Bushwick. Yeah, right, it was. It was the trendy part of Quito. What was that, February 2021? And I kept having thoughts where you're like, God, the rent here's gotta be so cheap

that you could just come there as this content creator and just wreak havoc on their economy. So there's a lot of, Cuenca even more, it's like an expat, an expat town, which the locals don't really mind, if what I understand, they're like, we just don't live in Old Town the way that they do, but there's money now.

There's money coming in. That's good, because I remember their currency had collapsed. Is this one or no? The other one. Yeah, I have this one. It's going to say accept. It's not going to do anything, but just accept. OK.

No? We tried this last time it didn't work downloading accessory oh there you go there you go there you go well hold on I gotta make sure there's no fucking nudes in here it's unless there's Sarah then someone will say wow I mean that's unbelievable. That's crazy. Wow. That's gorgeous, Maskon. Look at us with the hair with our mouth. Ben, it's so ready to freak out. That is so stupid that we did that. Did they make us do that? I think. Not on there. It's just like, I don't know, it's on, I don't know.

I think we're also a little scared of. Oh, I'm so scared. Oh, here's mosquitoes. Oh my gosh. Oh my god. Oh my God. I don't recall them being itchy though. Yeah, they were like quick, quick. Oh wait, there's the arepas.

Arepa? There's that place. Oh yeah. Wow. Arepa, that's the hut. That's the hut, and there's like a river down there. Yeah. Yeah, we sat on that table and played scat.

Yes, it was fucking great. Just leave, they're okay. There's this toucan. I'm scared. You see a toucan. Oh yeah, through the, through the, That's a fucking toucan. It's so cool looking.

That's a great photo right there. It's so cool looking. He knows it too. He knows it. Look at this little bitch. Look at his beak. How crazy that his beak is like a flag. And the sharp line, yeah. Right. Looks like it's like a Trinidad flag. It looks like this little bitch. Look at his beak, how crazy that his beak is like a flag. And the sharp line, yeah, looks like a Trinidad flag.

It looks like a little buoy. Jamaica, yeah, that's it, far away. The nature's great here. Oh yeah. What is that? I don't know, that's such a bad fact. I think that's in the Mendo Valley, or by the house. That's on the bird tour.

Yeah. Oh, there's the lady. There's the lady. Tight pant, those are painted on. They were, she must've been hot in that humidity. Bendita? No. No, that's a wild dog.

I was just staring, I was like, should I bite these motherfuckers? Oh, unbelievable. So many wild dogs. Oh, you know what I also remember? The grocery store. That's the bathroom you went to. That was the bathroom.

Yeah, that's what Sarah went. Not ideal bathrooms. It blew my mind that like, milk is just out and about, not in the fridge. Hey! There's the horse. Milk is just out, it's unpasteurized. Yeah. Yeah.

It's crazy. You're like, is this good? But I'll do, I'll push through. If you tell me it's good, I'll take your word for it. Yeah. Look, I mean, go back one. There's a spider. Look at that fucking thing.

Wow. That was just in the house. That's crazy. Didn't we also save a bird? A bird hit the window and we had to like nurse it back to life? That sounds like a you thing. Okay.

I kinda remember that. I wouldn't remember. Look how beautiful, this is the grounds of this place. Yeah, it's the house. We took a dip in there. Oh yeah, it got deep somewhere. Look at that. That's fucking horrifying.

Yeah. I wanna see this, I wanna see the down, straight down on the thing. Let me get that going. Start from the beginning, I wanna see all your pictures. I know, I'm just a little nervous, there's some. We're not, unless it's Sarah naked. That's what I'm more nervous about.

Okay, wow. Look at that horse with the car. You're looking at the car on that? Horsepower. I'm looking at something else. Look at his cock. That's it. That's what she's talking about.

Now that's the main house? That wasn't our house. Yeah, this is our house. Wow. You guys, oh yeah, yeah, I remember we had a floor bed. That was in our house. Yeah, this is our house Wow you guys oh Yeah, yeah, I remember that we had a floorbed And all right, are you gonna go the beginning? Yeah, I don't know this or you can send it to me later We're doing art museum to pre Colombian art museum, which is fucking cool. That was cool It's and it really showed you a bunch of history was in here. All right. Well, why don't you send me these later?

and it really showed you a bunch of history. All right, well, why don't you send me these later? What is this? That's our first hotel, that's when we first arrived. I like anything that has an indoor. Outside? Yeah, an indoor outside is really cool. Oh, Joe bought a piece of art. Oh yeah.

Oh, this is downtown, old town. This is when we first, the first day. Yeah, yeah, we sat right around there at eight. It's kind of just gorgeous and colonial. I just like walking around. Colonial is so much better word than colonizer. Oh, look at that. Right. I don't even remember that.

What are those? I think we came on those. Those are regular rolls. And then you came in those. I did some like. We were so happy to get regular rolls, we fizzed up. Yeah. Louis CK. So Louis was there, yeah, Louis had a bad face. He fucking. Look how cool we are.

We're so cool. Radio station. And that's the inside of the. Unbelievable. Of the church. Didn't we go to a mausoleum of like where they put dead bodies? In the church or something?

It was really, um. Yeah, downstairs in the church. Ornate. Downstairs. And it also had. Oh, there it is, yeah. Smoke. It was smoky. They put an ambiance for us. Oh, yeah. In this mausoleum downstairs. I also like when people come to visit,

even though we're just touristing ourselves, but like it's an excuse to go do something like this. Yeah. Wow, that's fucking, what a shot. It's an excuse, oh, someone's coming. It's kinda like the only time I do New York tourist stuff and then a friend comes. Yeah, oh, let's go check out the High Line.

Yeah, right. God, gorgeous, gorgeous, hold. I mean, I took a lot of photos. Yeah. All right, well. It's a lot of photos. Yeah. All right, well. It's a lot of back. I wanna see if you have the hummingbirds. I know I have a slo-mo of them.

I have some hummingbirds. I think I do. There's me-ta-do-moon-do. Oh, here we go. Oh, okay. Okay, this is cool. This is cool. I mean, right on the equator line.

Where's Joe coming in? Joe's coming in hot. Joe's coming in hot. Hops. Oh yeah, that's at least three, four inches off the ground right there. That's so cool. Woo.

I mean, you guys are on both sides of it at the same time in the air at the same time. The grounds of this are really beautiful too. They really do great. I like their coffee. I love a coffee. I love coffee in other countries. Me too.

Except when it's, you know. The coffee in Ecuador is not great, but occasionally you can find good, but you just get used to it pretty fast. Yeah. That's my dick size. Yeah. I don't know what I'm doing there. Overall, good trip for you guys?

Oh, it was one of the greats. Oh, it was one of the greats. One of the great trips. It really was such a blast having you there. Oh, I love. So this is just like the roads. Yeah, that's us driving in there. To get somewhere, that's what I mean by,

hold for a second, hold for a second, go back one. This is just like the nature everywhere. It's just so cool. Look at the birdway up there. Wow. Probably a toucan. This is just like the nature everywhere. It's just so cool. Look at the bird way up there. Wow. Probably a toucan. That's a cool photo.

The street dogs were out of control. They were scary. Yeah. This is me in town. This is me in town. But everybody doesn't care about the street dogs. And that's the road to get to the house. Wait, is this a video?

Go back. This is us getting to the place. Yeah. Somewhere I wanna show the horse video I made. Oh yeah, I wanna see that. That was probably well after the trip though. Let's see, that's the kitchen. That's the front yard.

That's the front yard. I have photos of the house here. Hold on, I'll get to them. I threw out, and I regret this. It was a free. Look at that. There was a, there was a, oh my God. Hold, hold for a second.

Don't you just want your house to be that way? I would just like my house to be like that. We would sit out there and smoke cigars. And then in here was just great. And it was just like to make this house with the open windows like this, because that's all you want to look at is outside. It was fucking and it rained every night. It was so beautiful.

There was a guy who was running for president there and I had a free shirt from him but then I found he was just a banker. He was just part of the evil elite. And so I threw it out. It got all dirty. I threw it out in this yard. Wow. Oh, that's slow mo.

You got a slow mo on good. Wow. I already thought he was the only one that thought of slow motion. I'm gonna get a better one. I might get a better one. You do. That guy's cool. Yeah. Super cool. Maybe I'll get a hungry bird tattoo. I'm gonna get a better one. You do. That guy's cool. Super cool.

I also remember she had a compost heap that I'm always jealous. That's a great photo. That's the outside one. God, that is great lighting. You look high, but you're not. Nah, we did find some good weed, but then it was like, it's kinda psychedelic weed.

It was 30 bucks for 30 grams. Oh, that's a nice one. Yeah, so every morning, every morning, we'd just go out there, drink our coffee, and then be like, eventually let's get our day started and let's go on a hike. How many nights were we there for? I don't remember.

Four? Four nights in Mindo? I think so. Maybe three. Our brunt of our trip was there. Yeah. What? Most of our trip was there.

Was there, yeah, yeah. Oh, bandit. Bandit fucking rules. Oh, I think the horse is coming up. So that's, okay, so this is the path to get to the horse area, and we had just already gone through the gate. I mean, where is he?

I don't know, it was still a mystery to me. I really did feel like we closed the gate. I almost felt like he knows how to unlatch it. That's probable. Cause she really didn't care as a horse guide. I was like, yeah, he'll do that. Was there anything you guys wanted to do that you didn't? Do you remember?

No. Cause I didn't know, I was really bad about this trip. I didn't really do any research on Ecuador to tell you. So that means it was all gold. That's the lady. That's her house. Right, there she is. She's like, I killed six million Jews.

I think. I was a baby, but we killed many Jews. I left when it was 5.75. I was like, I'm out. This is too many. She's like, this is getting to be a little much. I just thought it was gonna be a million. I was smoking cigars.

Boy, I take a great photo. You do, yeah. At joelisfotography on Instagram. Yeah, that's right. I should go post some of this. One of the best followers in all of standup. Thank you, all old school. Just photos.

Yeah, we hiked around the... Hiked around there. Just the, what do you call that? Goddamn, Drew. What's the word I'm looking for? There's the house. There's the house, maybe it wasn't an A-frame. It's pretty A-framy, sort of.

It's got a roof. Yeah. A-frame you out of the video. Yeah, what a trip. That's our outfits. Those are our hiking outfits. What a stupid boot trip. The's our outfits. Those are our hiking outfits. What a stupid boot trip. The boots.

I was mad. That looks like Jurassic Park. Yeah, it looks exactly like Jurassic Park. Oh, we got the raft and shit? So that's what we rafted on? Yeah. That level of rapids. I mean, listen, if you're on a boat, okay,

on a raft, not as great. Wow. There it is. Oh no, we didn't take that one though. We took the foursome. That's like a twofer. And I was like, I can't do that. Yeah, we were in a gate.

There it is. The little grate on the bottom. Huh? Oh, that's a video. Sarah's holding an early diarrhea. I don't know, guys. What's that? Are you guys holding hands?

Yeah. He's like, now we're good. He went down over to the surface. There it is. Yeah, and it is high and it's rickety and it's just like, what are the safety protocols in here, the what's? Right.

That's a rule, that rules. Oh my God. Yeah, they have a little rug in the middle of it. Go back, go back. Yeah, so you can't fucking look straight down. You're like, there you go, we covered it. All good. Oh my god.

This is one of the favorite trips of all time. I gotta say, thank you guys for coming. Oh, thank you for having us. Are you kidding? It was the most perfect time, like what we weren't doing the road. Nothing else was going on. Yeah, I didn't understand

I asked well I guess people were scared, but I actually felt like it's this is actually the safest time to go traveling It's so insane. So yeah going off into space and then there's another little thing there Yeah, so that we had already gone through a big one. Yeah, and then we transferred over Yeah, I took less photos in the big one because I was shitting my pants. Yeah, we had to transfer. And then we walked down, I'm assuming. There were car pickup places. Sarah's hurting there. Holding in a dial. I was like, okay.

I assume this is a video of a little waterfall. It's just brown shit coming down. I mean, right there, that's nice to have those shoes. Oh, we had walk, I was really into the walking stick. Didn't you put it in your pussy at one point? I did. Yeah. I did. I kinda remember that.

It was painful at first, but then I got used to it. In front of everyone, you were like, guys, watch this. Yeah. And then you suck the end of it. Yeah, you were like, it really shows, you stick to it and it's a whole new experience. You guys did not see that one coming. No, you really the end of it. Yeah, you were like, it really shows you stick to it and it will help your experience. You guys did not see that one coming. No, you really shocked us.

Wow. Well, by the way, we're only standing in the water because we had the boots. Right, we just wouldn't have. I guess we should go stand in the water. That is such a cool pic. That's our album cover. I'm able to add the cover of the fucking.

Bandit looks emaciated. Bandit always does. Bandit worked out. She'll never give up. She'll never like actually stop. She'll just be like, I'm going as long as you guys are going. Yeah, this is dynamite.

I could have done more hiking. Yeah. Yeah, we did a couple days of hiking. I mean, we're gonna go on a little hike the last day, but instead we went on a tour of gas stations. Yeah, I did a couple days of hiking. I mean, we're gonna go on a little hike the last day, but instead we went on a tour of gas stations. Yeah, I can't regret. I also regret the bird watching, even though we did have some funny.

Well, that was, most of us was sick though. It would've been fun. Because we were talking about what did we wanna do, and I think I pushed for the bird. I liked the bird watching. In hindsight, like all these memories, even the horse getting out, I was like, oh, that was terrible, but the memory, like you said,

was so good. Yeah, it was so fun. It was a cool footbridge. So it's like, oh, that was terrible, but the memory, like you said, is so good. Yeah, it's so fun. It's a cool foot bridge. So it's like, how often do you get to wrangle a horse? Is that our shit? That was my, my pattern. Oh yeah, that was your shit. Go back, go back, go back, go back, go back, go back.

Wow. Zoom in. I mean, that is not an ideal toilet. That's one of the better ones. I don't even think it flushed. And that's not a door, there's no door there. Or maybe there's a door. I think there is a door. There's a door. I don't think think it flushed. And that's not a door, there's no door there. Or maybe there's a door. I think there's a door.

I don't think I would just diarrhea with an open door. I did. Look at that fucking thing. Wow, that's where we're headed. That's where we had come from, where we're headed. Yeah, it was on my list of stuff to do, the Me No Cloud Force, I gotta find the right time. It's like, oh cool, you guys come in,

it'll make us go back to Quito, and then we'll go from there. God, this fucking trip rules. Was that exercise equipment? Oh, they're like seesaws. That might be a school. I think it's a school. Oh, okay.

I mean, does any of this, yep. That's her dog. Oh yeah. Friendly dog, so he gets what he wants. I was really into that dog, and then he was later, bro. He's so cute. Sarah's inside doing a show. No, but you can see me in the reflection. That's what so cute. Sarah's inside doing a show.

No, but you can see me in the reflection. There's you doing a show. Oh, that's the reflection. I thought you were inside for some reason. I look sad. This is a video of something, hopefully not. I was fucking. Slowly comes up.

It's me with the walking stick up my pussy. Oh yeah, I forgot I videoed it. As you're leaving through new ones, I like to ask people these questions. Where is on your list, same shirt, of places to go? Is there any place you are looking to? That's the burglary nurse back. It hit the wall, we had to put it in a box. We looked up how do you nurse them back.

Yes, I don't even remember that. It'll freak out, so you put it in a box where it's dark and confined until it regains, cause otherwise it'll fly out and smash itself again. Oh, my only fans. Ha ha ha ha ha. That's right before you fucked your pussy

with the stand his tail. Yeah, I was really into fucking my pussy. You did so much pussy fucking. Ha ha ha ha. I did. I need to eat. I am on an empty stomach to smoke a cigar. I'm gonna throw up. Right now now not throw up, but I'm shaky

Oh, that was that's not my dumb Oh, I know it that's probably like a she looked great here. That's my usual Look at that the river behind us Yeah, it's like a dip a drop drop. Oh, poor Sarah. Wow. I don't know that shirt, Sarah. No, I know what shirt it is. It's, there's our, oh, that's the, it was so fucking good. It doesn't look, it does not look good. It looks like cheese and bread. That looks like a, something much as your bachelor friend would make,

but they had plantains and avocado and black beans. Do you remember the avocados? No. Massive and the seed was like that big. Oh yeah. There's my city. Oh yeah yeah. Highlight.

Oh yeah, this is like a little bodega. Oh there's the horse. There's the horse. And we're chasing it, we got, yes. Oh that's great. Bandit looking at it. It's like I think they're. We're like let's get the car, it's too far,

where the fuck is it? Then we got out of the car, the horse is just like, we're going on an adventure. Chasing after it. This is us chasing the horse back. We're like, come on, man, please. As me with a cigarette. That must have been post horse.

Post horse. Yeah, those are celebratory, and then this is, I'm dying here. There's our hiking boots. Yeah, those's our regular boots that she thought weren't gonna be efficient. Slow, slow. Sorry.

Okay, yeah, that's us all looking at it, at trying to find the thing, cool. Ah, okay. Okay, yeah, that lady, so then we left the lady, we're like, all right, we're going home. She goes, what, we still have two hours, you pay for two more hours. Like, I know, but we're not gonna do it.

We saw the toucan. She was like, well, I'm gonna stay out here and look at birds. Yeah, it was just kind of, we would see her in the background just looking at birds. Yeah, we're like, ah, how you doing? We're packed up. It was kind of, it was good.

Because we got a late checkout, let's do something early in the morning and then we can use that day. Wow. Laser beam eyes. Yeah. You guys got food? I saw these ones.

Obviously morning. Yeah, there's the horse back in his pen. Show me that picture, send me the video of the horse. Maybe I'll put it in the middle or maybe I'll put it at the end. Yeah, I put it to like dance music. Oh, that's great. It's fucking hilarious, but it was probably a week later.

This Burger King. Burger King, woo! My beacon. Yeah, and this is what, back in Quito? Yeah. Wait, okay, yeah. Yeah, that's the restaurant. That's cool, oh wait.

That's. Oh, Singin' in the Rain. Wow. Cantando Baja la Lluvia. The Lluvia, yeah, wow in the rain. Canto baja la lluvia. The lluvia, yeah. Wow. Oh yeah. So many, oh my God, hold on for a second.

That's crazy. That's Sarah's leg, by the way. She didn't shave the whole time. Sarah, that's disgusting. But it can't get that way. Get out. It's on its way there. As we look through these, I'll keep telling you to stop.

Where is on your, yes, that hotel. Yeah, this was nice. I really, that hotel was great. Once I figured out this one, I stayed there so many times. We'd leave our car there. They'd be like, we got a little garage. You can leave it here if you come back. Like we went to the Amazon, then came back to our car.

I liked it was like different levels and the furniture was cool. And this is incredible. They had the breakfast in the morning. It's entirely possible we're gonna. This must be on the way to the airport because that was pretty cool. There's the apron.

There's our, that's, yeah. I look kind of jacked there. You do. Look shredded. Oh, this is the compilation video. Of all the stuff? Yeah, this is the whole trip. Wow.

This is like four minutes long. Maybe we could just play this and, where I wanna go is the far east. I always say that. I wanna go to Japan and Vietnam and stuff. I don't know when we're gonna be able to do that now with a baby. Okay.

I did see, when I was in Vietnam, I was at the Kuchi Tunnels. No joke. And there was a family there. There was two like seven and nine year olds. And they took their kids. Yeah, you can bring your kids. Yeah, they didn't quite appreciate

that this is where the Vietnamese fucking killed a bunch of soldiers. But they were like, there's a fun cat. There's no Lego land for that. There's no Lego. And then South America, I'd like to go to Bolivia and Argentina.

That was the arm rest? What? Oh, I don't remember these. That is not on the armrest. Like this. Look at those lips. I'm trying to think where in South America I would go. I wouldn't mind Paraguay or Uruguay

because it's not like you ever meet anyone that's from there. I really want to go to Uruguay. Bandit would make so many friends. I would do Argentina or the- This is on the way to the house. Oh yeah. What's the Patagonia place?

That's Argentina. Argentina, but I think it also hits Chile. I think Patagonia is the whole region of both. And then this and. Falkland Islands, what Antarctica? Antarctica. Oh twins. I was scared to touch it.

Anti-Semitic. Can't touch my nose. You're the one with the nose. Look, man, I'm making a friend. We're holding hands. The whole trip was very, very fun until the end, and that was a lasting memory. But it did not.

Diarrhea's funny. Yeah, you look back and you're like, of all the sicknesses, that's the funniest one. The fun thing about travel is the moments of real distress become stuff you remember fondly. Oh, absolutely absolutely. Well things going right aren't good stories. That's what I have with Tuesdays and Stories is like it's hard now because you're like yeah I flew there and stayed in a really nice hotel. It was sold out and the show was great and I came home with a bunch of money. Maybe I should take over. I just did a veil trip that took forever to get to.

What what so that's so you you wanna go to Patagonia, you wanna go there, okay. Well, no, I actually think I wanna go to the Patagonia. That's nice, I like that. Yeah, any hiking, also Jasper. We wanted to go, we almost went on our honeymoon to Jasper National Park. Jasper, Wyoming? No, it's in Canada. Banff kinda area.

Oh, interesting. The western. I've been to Banff and it is gorgeous. What's this one? We're singing some stupid song. We're probably singing Nobody Loves Love, like a lover loves love or something like that. That's Scott. That's us.

He's like, please stop. Please just stop. Go. Come on. No. Where are you going? Birdwatcher lady. She was so, I love someone passionate about their stuff.

Yes. Right. We got the right one. I went to two different tours of the Komodo Dragons and one guy was so into it. And then the next guy's like, come on, come on, let's go, next move. This is fun. Yeah.

Took our shoes off, it's up in the water. I'm always grateful for a place that's kind of off the grid, so at least not 100% of the photos are me looking at my phone. Yeah, there was no real connection there, right? Yeah. And again, there was no show business happening. Those coils, get those coils to keep mosquitoes away,

which did not work. There was no showbiz happening. Yeah, it wasn't like- So you didn't feel like you were messing out. Yeah. Can we stop for a second and just say like, go keep it going, but like, how amazing it was to have no responsibility for a bit.

Well, I just had the Sarah Was In Veil for that festival and for five days I had a completely clear schedule and I just had my son. I was like oh this is the way I should be living. I'm just like hanging out with a boy. With like mysterious funds coming in. Yeah and then he would go to. If you could just be rich with no obligations.

And then, yeah, no, I gotta stop scrolling here. Why, is where the naked stuff comes? Possibly. Is you and, is me and Louis and you. Yeah, that's us, that was my first special. I love that photo. I remember posting this for your special. Yeah.

And getting like, hey, careful. Yeah, yeah, it was like, it was still like, hey, I don't know if we can post this. From management? From everybody. Yeah. And it's like, well, I. Yeah, yeah, it was like, it was still like, hey, I don't know if we can post. From management? From everybody. Yeah. And it's like, what? Oh, I just wanna post a picture.

I was at the special taping. Can I just post about it? Right, you're also like, what's this our friend? Yeah, it's our buddy. No, I had that when I first did a gig at Soul Jules during COVID, and my manager called me and was like, just a heads up, I don't know if you wanna do this.

Louie hasn't done a show, it's gonna get a lot of heat. You're gonna bring on heat. And I was like, I'm doing a gig in Pennsylvania with my friend. And by the way, zero people cared. Not a single person cared. But in terms of that mindset of people being like, would you just be care, I'm like, that's my buddy.

You don't get it. And they go, no. Right. There's a story I heard, don't know if it's true or not, but think it is, of them thinking of doing Poodie Tang again, and going to Chris Rock and going, we can do Poodie Tang,

and goes, I will do it on, of course, Louie will be doing it. And this is the time where people are like, I don't know if we can work with them, and he goes, I'll do it if Louie does it. And they go, sure, love it. And then coming back, like we looked at the contract, we actually don't need to we can work with them. And he goes, I'll do it if Louis does it. And they go, sure, love it. And then coming back, we looked at the contract. We actually don't need to include Louis on this.

We actually are not legally obligated to do that. And Chris Rock's like, fuck face. I just said I'm only doing it with Louis. It's not because of the contract. It's because he made the movie. Yeah, it's silly. Yeah, it's another one you look back on. Who cares?

We have to go and leave. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, man. This was fun. Last thing travel tips. I got one I'll start if someone tells you to boil water boil the water boil the water Yeah, it's hard to remember. I think I was just on the show and gave a travel tip So I've on what you're on this was you get another one on your show? My pet peeve is when somebody shows up on a travel with the worst shoes ever. Bad sne, like you're going high,

like sometimes people will show up at Sandals and you're like, you can't walk in fucking Sandals. I like how he turns into a pet peeve. Travel tips, like, well my pet peeve is this. Well, no, I think about, my plantar fasciitis was so bad from those galoshes to hiking that. Galoshes? You never use that word anymore.

The worst. I would wear sneakers as much as I could. And get them dirty. Comfortable shoes. I think my travel tip is a good travel partner. You gotta make sure you know the person, who they are, what they're into. Can you be in an apocalypse with them?

Yeah, and they're not cynical and shitty and, I saw this, I don't like this. I don't wanna do it. Yeah, you gotta get someone. Also, you want someone that doesn't feel like they need to do the dishes before you leave for the day. I'm not gonna name names. That was the three of us and one other person.

No. It's like, let me just knock out all of these dishes. We also forgot, we went flea market shopping. Where? We did? Yeah. I don't remember that at all. Yeah, we did.

I think you bought a few items. Oh, you bought a, an Arepa press or a tortilla press. It was like a wood and everything's, yeah, I know that place. I was like a wood and everything's, yeah, I know that place. I don't know where we did it. Oh, I think it was Cuenca. There's a lot of markets there.

And they're pretty cheap and they go from anywhere from like things like that, like an engraved, like not engraved, but like a fire fence. Yeah, flint. Or just like usable, like Patacona press. Yeah. I also think this is my actual tip. Oh, that's what it was.

It was for plant to make the plantana chips. I also think don't over research. Too many people will do too much research and then they're like. Keep it loose. I don't wanna see 100 photos of where I'm going to. Right. I'm like, then I'm looking at them like,

oh yeah, you showed me that photo. I saw that already. You saw that photo. Yeah. I like to go, let's just leave and start fucking walking. We were amazed by the look of the toucan. We weren't like, yep, that's the one I came for. Right, because everything,

that's what's so great about foreign travel, it's what I love about it, is everything is interesting. Street sign, bushes, it's like when you walk around Manhattan people are taking photos of mailboxes. Even that picture of the crossing the road, the go, where the guy's moving. You took a picture of that because it's like,

that's different than my country. Right, it's great. And I try to sometimes bring that mindset into track. I feel this all the time, like, you drive the Merritt Parkway in Connecticut to go to Boston, I'm like, if we were in South America, I'd be like, oh my God, there's trees! So you try to bring that into where you live.

Yeah, well I will say, in terms of the tip of like go with people you enjoy. I really enjoyed you guys coming. It made it such a fun time. Well we'll do it in the summer in England. Yeah, 100%. We'll go to Wales. Maybe you can take us to some places, yeah.

Oh Wales, we gotta come back on and talk about Wales because that was the best trip, folks. Okay. Well, our Wales trip, because I had been to Peru with my ex-girlfriend, I was like, Sarah, we gotta do a trip that beats, because as it stands now, the best trip of my life was with my ex-girlfriend.

So we went to Wales and it did beat Peru. It was the fucking greatest. We hiked all day, every day. That's great. I like, I love a trip that's like, we are here to hike. Yeah, hike is true. Everything else is stupid. There's something I've always fallen into too, of like, oh, where should I eat?

Where's the best place to eat? And it's like, I have to tell myself, I live in New York City. No food, unless you're in Paris or something like that, no food in this town is gonna be equal to an average restaurant here. So just get some food and go. Yeah.

Right. Well that's why I like that it was this, cheeseburger. It was this friends, the games, and their repas by the water. And it was delicious. Yeah. And awesome. Still to this day is one of my favorite meals ever. I've never had, yeah.

And that's something that like, if we read about in a blog, then other people are now trying to do that thing. Right, it would be the hot spot, but you're like, I don't know, you can't recreate it. And bring a deck of cards. Bring a deck of cards. I appreciate you guys embracing scat,

which is my favorite pastime. We got way into it. Oh, it's so fun. Scat's fun. It was a fun game. I've told this story, sorry, sorry. Tom Dustin and I, years ago, we stayed at my grandparents' house,

which was like in Maine. It was like, it's a caboose. It's like three feet wide and four feet long. And we just drank rum and cokes and played one-on-one scat for four hours straight. It's one of my favorite memories. Cause I was also pre-phone. There was no, now everyone looks at TikTok.

Right, that's why I like the trips where you are off the grid when we go to. There's no, the internet sucks. Where is that? The campgrounds? Bleep it out there. Oh yeah, Shenandoah National Park. Yeah.

It's probably. I said it one time, one guy emailed me, he was like, dude, don't say the town. Nobody's here, it's fucking awesome. They listen for us saying, believe that. Okay. The editors, so they will. Okay, great.

Okay, great. Yeah, there's one, it was like, I went to see Dolly Parton and the people came up to me, like thank you for coming to this town, it was in the middle of Mississippi. And they go, hey, dude, I hope you enjoy it. Please don't tell. We don't want a bunch of tourists coming.

Right, right. Well, it sucks. Remember when we went to Zion and we were so naive about showing up to hiking that you had to book, you should show up early. Everywhere now you have to book. And it was 20 million people on a hiking trail and we had to wait in line to go around bends of the hike.

I cannot, I know that you're supposed to be taking it in but I also wanna go at my own pace. Also, I don't wanna worry about somebody on my ass the whole time. You want like, you move faster, oh shit, I'm sorry, I'm just going too slow. Yeah, it was, I didn't really, I liked where we stayed, but the hiking situation, I was like, this is awful.

That house also rocks. That was actually the best Airbnb of all time. You know the story of that guy. So there's an Airbnb in actual Zion National Park. Which he said was the only one in there. Yeah, I think there might be more now, but it was in Butch Cassie and Sundance kid It had been used for something interesting and I told the guys like hey, we're coming

I was like, oh, that's way too much and he's like, what are you coming for? It goes It's me and like four friends. There's like eight rooms here, right? I'm like four friends. We're just we're just like comics. We're just going to relax. Oh, you're like performers You're like we made this for you Yeah, it was I'll give you half price. You gotta come. If you wanna relax and get away from all the, this is why we made it.

And there was cave paintings, which was insane. Oh, the cave paintings were so cool. Yeah, we've been to some cool spots. Cave paintings are so fucking cool. Actual cave paintings. To know that you were in a spot where man was there, like, I don't know, 10,000s of years ago. I think of the that must've happened.

All over. That's what caves are for. All right, boys. Thank you very much. One more time. I laid in. What? Yeah. Girl. No Dick. Yeah. Well, it's like in Espana, you combine. Oh, I wish she had a blick. That'd be so cool. I laid this in earlier, but one more time. Sarah's got a special. Two. Two on YouTube.

I'm just thinking of the new one. What are they? Butthole Money and Voluptuous Boy. Butthole Money and Voluptuous Boy? Yeah. That's great. Check them out. Which one's the last one?

Butthole Money. I have four now. I hate myself. This year's material, enough for everybody. And Small Ball, which is the newest one. Now the new one, Small Ball, it's been out for about a month. Yes.

Check that out. Both these guys are fucking hilarious comics. Both of them are coming on my storytelling show. Yeah. Coming soon. Oh my God, that was fun. Both of you guys crushed. That was special.

That was a special night of my life. Mainly because Sarah and I didn't interact. I left and she came. Ships in a night. That was a really fun night. I can't wait for that. Yeah, I'm excited for everybody to see it. Alright everybody, until next week.

Hasta mañana. Hasta luego. Well, that's the episode everybody. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you enjoyed it. I got my new passport. I'm about to set it to some use But before I do I want to show you what I'm gonna do with one of these you be tripping stickers Yeah, they're clear designs abracadabra the guy who made the shroom fest shirts Every year for the shroom fest shirts if you have one

I once saw one on the way to, actually, Valley Vibes, at Bonoguay canceled, for rain, and I was like, fuck, and I was taking my RV, driving to Valley Vibes with Leon, which is the designer of the shirt. Some guy saw me, pulled up and goes, look, look, he's wearing the Schoomfest shirt that Leon designed, he goes, you want a joint? And some mushrooms, I said, yes, for the joint,

but for the mushrooms, for sure, yes. And he gave us some mushrooms and we did it. A guy in a Scho for the mushrooms, for sure yes. He gave us some mushrooms and we did it. A guy in a shoomfasher, it was wild. It was fucking wild. Hold on, hold on. Thank you very much Sarah Tolamash and Joe List for coming on today's episode, and honestly thank you

for being the only ones of my friends that came to visit me during the six months that I was in Ecuador. Six fucking months, and all these friends, Shane was like, I'll come to see you when you go to the beach. Came to the beach. He was too busy becoming one of the top five comics in the world. Lame. All these other people said, I'll go visit you when you're in Quito. Did not.

Lame. Okay, if you think these stickers are not, you can also put it on your water bottle, the way I did here. Don't forget to see Joe List Special Small Ball and Sarah Tolomasa Special Butthole Money that are available on YouTube right now. It is the best time in the world for stand-up comedians. We have Ability, there it is, best time in the world for stand up comedians we have ability there it is clear guys clear I found and I found a clear page on here

and now I shall put it on let's see here one shot I did it upside down by accident. That's there forever now. It's there forever upside down. Isn't that cool? It's like a passport stamp. Isn't that fucking cool? So as you're flipping through, as you get these, you know, whatever, all your passport stamps,

you have one right there in your passport. You'd be tripping. It looks like fucking, like a fucking passport stamp go see Joe list on the road as well I don't think Sarah is unless she's open for Joe but or she needs to update her website but Joe's on the road Woodstock New York Morris Plains New Jersey Portland Maine Portsmouth New Hampshire Burlington Vermont Northampton Massachusetts Woodstock New York Morris Plains New Jersey Denver Colorado get tickets at comedianjoless.com.

I am one final gig, Charlestown, West Virginia, July 12th, get tickets at rhsphere.com. Guys, please subscribe wherever you're listening. I hope you're enjoying this podcast. I want you to subscribe and click that little bell thing to let you know that, overall, it should remind you, new episodes. Even the episodes of people you don't know are good. Get your fucking Schoomfisher too.

Ooh, I'm excited for that. Wait, what note did I put in here for? Guys, this is the last, probably, or second to last, intro outro. By the way, the way the hummingbird video that was mine Joe lists one sucked compared to mine yeah my hummingbird video I set up the fucking clamps that this thing is on right now right outside the hummingbird on slow motion all day what good shots yeah sure Joe lists photography is a good follow on Instagram but you know what I made the best hummingbird video I can't get over what a good time

that was smoking those cigars on that balcony at the place in Mindo what's her name Dominique so because it's one of the last ones I'll do from here from intro outro I want to go over with you guys the stuff that's in this in this shot hosted by Dominique. For sure stay there until I sent you. What do you say? Come on a trip with me with all my travel souvenirs. I think I've said everything I got to say. Shroomfest shirts pre-sale starts right now and plus with possibly limited run colors that are only available Let's start from here. First of all, this Diablo of a mask is a

Endemic to Ecuador. Let's start with that. That's where the shirts from It's part of a ceremony they take them and, I guess I'll just put it on actually. The front has and the back both have eyelids so you can ward off evil spirits. I've worn this many times. They do these in their indigenous ceremonies sometimes, here in the back, so evil spirits can't sneak up on you. Also, this should be used for those goddamn fucking shitty birds in Australia. Which ones are those? The ones that fucking swoop?

The swooping ones? They're really pretty, black and white. This one's from the Chiapas slash Guatemala region. I got it in Guatemala. I like to get a mask in every place I go. It's very white things to do. From Tobago, island Tobago, outside Trinidad, where I was for Carnival on my birthday a couple years ago. Go the Maroon!

It's State of Origin. It's State of Origin. It's like a North versus South rugby match in Australia they have every year. It's a three origin. It's state of origin. It's like a north for South rugby match In Australia they have every year. It's a three game series mate verse mate state verse state Look it up. I don't know how much I go into you with you. That's from a Some it's a bag from something I bought In the Galapagos on Isabella Island. There's some fucking postcards from fans a

Hat I bought in Cuba where I was with Bobby Kelly. A fucking beret I got in France, Paris, where I was taking a writing class from Rolf Potts who wrote this book Souvenir. It's more of a coffee table book. And this book, The Vagabond's Way, it is one thing a day, 365 days a year, just like travel, meditations on travel. Just like, it's a fucking great read, actually. I gotta bring this with me. Gotta bring that with me. A conch shell from Dominican Republic.

Bro, sure I paid too much. I paid 10 bucks for a fucking salad. But this guy took whatever was living in here out with a fork while I was on the beach in Boca Chica, which they said was a disgusting beach, but compare it to fucking Rockaway, are you out of your mind?

It's one of the cleanest beaches I've ever been to. Beautiful. Pulled it right out of that, put some salt and pepper on it, ate it right up. Mm, it did me right. Oh, yeah. I should burn some of this. It's got to be from Ecuador, right?

Puerto Lopez, oh yeah, in the Manabi region. It's Palo Santo. They burn fucking a bunch of these to call everybody in to show you that there's more for sale. It's extremely cheap, but it just makes a delicious smell. I didn't know it was from Manabi. Manabi, oh yeah it says Ecuador right there. The Manabi region is where they have ceviches, all different kinds of ceviches all over Latin America. Peruvian ceviche is different than Ecuadorian for sure.

One's more watery. But the Manabi region of Ecuador puts peanut butter in their ceviche and I know what you're thinking but they all do it and it is amazing and if it wasn't amazing they wouldn't all do it. A lighter from Slovenia let's see if it works it does it does and then this from Myanmar I got this from a woman who helped me find a temple to go onto in this temple town in Western, I think Myanmar, Midwestern Myanmar. And me and these Canadian chicks, she ran us out to go watch the sunset. And then she was like, I actually sell stuff, but she wasn't hawking, she let us enjoy the sunset for like an hour.

And then I was like, lady, I'm for sure gonna get you something. So it's a pipe that I've never smoked out of. I just think it's beautiful. And she made it, she carved it and all. God, that brings me back. What a fucking cool place. What a fucking cool place. What a cool fucking place.

We got a, look at this. My buddy Ethan gave me this. I gave him something, he gave me this from Guatemala. Australian guy, episode coming on that. Thank you Ethan, I still have it. I lost it, I didn't realize it was under. This jewelry box I got in either Shanghai or Beijing China What are we gotten here, okay a Thailand I never used

Wow lots of shit. Notebook. Churrosqueria, Plataforma that we used to do a male comedian's dinner. Lewis, that was a great idea. We should definitely do that again. That's about it. That's all you gotta know. The fucking craftsmanship on this, I mean, that's falling apart, so maybe not. So maybe not.

But I did get it in China and I brought it back. That was my first trip, my first long trip. My agent sent me out there. My travel journal, which I suggest everybody does when you're traveling. Get a journal, fill it up, and it will remind you, oh wow, this is fucking loose, of things and places that you forgot. Every morning, those same Canadian chicks, one of them was journaling in the morning,

and what are you doing? She goes, I journal every day. And I was like, oh really? And I started doing it. I missed the first week or so. But it was in that temple? And I started doing it. I missed like the first like week or so. But it was in that, in that temple town. That I won't say, I don't like to say out loud because I don't want to ruin it.

3-12, March 12th, Tio picked me up and I followed him to, to Mohammed's shop. Then he got a board. Oh, I asked Tio why he wasn't teaching me because he had to go buy wood. I took surf lessons in Indonesia on Flores Island. He hooked me up with weed. Here it is, actually.

I asked him to get me some and he said for 500K, which is 40 bucks. I didn't want nearly that much, just enough for two to three joints. I offered him 300K and I said, get me that much. He needed 500 because he didn't have enough for all he was gonna buy yet. I didn't know how, but he talked me into it.

Going to an ATM to get another 200K. I'd get the weed later. I did get the weed. It was some of the shittiest weed I ever had. And I spoke to it on a hilltop with three people from four people from Seattle. While the wind fucking ripped through this campfire. Oh, what a fucking fun night. What a fun fucking night as and then we saw the people like breaking into our bikes gotta get down god let's see if I start early on the poverty in Yangon especially in the outskirts is astounding crazy first sentence this is for my bus Wow to where I was going I'm getting weed withdrawal dreams it's been about seven days I don't know if I should take a gummy today

for that city I must have had a couple gummies or save it. I guess I have two to three doses left. I took gummies in? Wild, are you? Are you nuts? Legit, are you nuts? I would never advise anyone to take gummies into Myanmar, a fucking country run by the military. I don't even have a desire for it, actually.

The plan was to take it on this day, but I was thinking wow my dreams have moved from oh my god Myanmar what's dating life like oh that's right I interviewed somebody in lay the morning take oh my god woke up feeling a 1 22 17 1 22 17 weird customs in Myanmar. You got on shared van. Why they can't when you get on a shared van, why can't I understand why you wouldn't want to tie a small black trash bag to the back of the seat in front of you?

It's for barfing. I didn't realize so later. I know that now. Wow, I mean I gotta go through this. But what a journal will do for you is help you fucking remember your thoughts. And when I'm going over stories of stuff that happens, I'll refer to that and it'll like bring me back

and tell me about people that were there. Like Tio, like that fucking surf instructor Who hooked me up with the weed guy and how much it was I wouldn't have known how much it was There's a hat. I got in a market in between two cities in Myanmar in Lay Lake and Something we stopped at a market in a town. We really should not have stopped in we weren't allowed to stop in my friend Derek did Who took that crazy chin loan picture chin loan ball We really should not have stopped in. We weren't allowed to stop in. My friend Derek did, who took that crazy chin loan picture, chin loan ball.

Yeah, we all stopped there and he shut down the market. A white guy in Myanmar, they were like, what the fuck, that's crazy. It's like someone who's eight foot two. I had to shipped this back. When I shipped it back, because I couldn't carry it around, it's kind of hard. Chin loan ball, watch it.

It's like they play volleyball with their feet and they get like one foot above the net. It's nutty. I shipped it back. I took it to Thailand, shipped it back in Thailand. You want it back in a week? I'm like, no. They're like, well, that's going to cost you $600. I don't. They're like, how about a month? I'm like, what do you got slower? They're like, shipped it back in Thailand. Like you want it back in a week? And I'm like, no. They're like, well, that's gonna cost you $600.

I was like, I don't. They're like, how about a month? I'm like, what do you got slower? They got, we got like three months. Goes on the back of a snail. And I was like, yeah, that's perfect. Cause I still, it'll still beat me home. By the way, the PO box is shut down.

Please no longer send anything there. From Ecuador, that my super Mario got me back from Ecuador, when I met him, I was like, ¿Dónde eres? And he was like, Ecuador. I'm like, oh, viven en Ecuador. I don't know how to say tense. And he goes, what? I just got him back.

Oh, anyway, we got this hat. I think it says chillax. I'm not really sure, but it says something in Burmese. If anyone knows Burmese, tell me what this says. I think it says pretty much like chill bro, chillax. Anyway, I was like, I've been to Ecuador, where you from? He goes, it's like near Guayaquil.

And I'm like, where? He goes, you wouldn't know it. And I was like, oh, I was like all over. He was like, really? For how long? I was like, six months, bro. He's like, where you from? He goes, El Troncal, El Troncal, I forget.

I go, oh yeah, I stayed there once. He was like, what? What do you mean? I go, I'm not gonna stay in Guayaquil. It's a fucking hellscape before the fucking gangs took over. Who's this? Yankees? No, this is from the, oh, my World Series, 2024, my World Series.

Went with me, Canon, and Renazzi. Also, Ecuador has some of the best chocolates in the world. All Swiss chocolate goes to Ecuador for their coffee beans. And Picari is one of their brands. And it's delicioso. If it wasn't Wednesday when I'm recording this, I could eat it. Trippie award for Colin T. Riehl, biggest piece of shit, stiffing a Thai hooker. Later found out he didn't really stiff him, but I stand by it because he did go down on a Thai hooker.

Where's this from? Grand Canyon or Zion? Zion. Some Zion National Park. This is a Tanika for making coffee. I got it in Egypt. The bargaining situation for getting this is so fucking wild. Those guys murder me on. You think, listen, you think, oh Jews are good at bargaining. Not when you've met a fucking shop owner from goddamn, not even Giza, where was it? Luxor? It was crazy, they killed me. They killed me on two hookahs and on this thing. No, by the time I got this, my cab driver, Mehdi, I think his name was, no, Mohammed.

He goes, buddy, I saw how much you paid for this, can I just go in and buy this for you? And I'm like, no, you can pay for it. No, I'm not gonna pay for it, I'm just gonna get it. And he goes, buddy, I saw how much you paid for this. Can I just go in and buy this for you? And I'm like, no, you can pay for it. No, I'm not gonna pay for it. I'm just gonna get it. And he goes, $2. You would have paid 100. Some chips from Greece.

Not bad. This was given to me by a guest. Who's coming. He did one on New Zealand. You'll see it coming. Grindr, Ari Shaffir, fine goods. Grindr. This is pre-Columbian from Guatemala. This thing was everywhere. And I took it as the Yoga with Ari mascot while I was doing it in Ecuador.

Um, this thing, so guys, I was in the jungle. I mean, I guess a lot of this is from Ecuador. This thing, so guys, I was in the jungle. I mean, I guess a lot of this is from Ecuador. I was in the jungle and this dude who was working at a, Niki Hatz, who was working at this lodge, this hotel, the first place I got to in the Amazon, I should pick some fucking wandering Jews and travel all around Ecuador with them in a gatorade bottle.

I planted them where I am, in a potter. They're still alive, Shlomo, Shlomo the wandering Jew. He out of a can, he made this. He also did a fire dance, but he was like pretty bad at it. He was like just learning fire dance. And I could tell, because I'm a performer, by trade when he was done, no And I could tell, because I'm a performer by trade, when he was done, no one else could tell.

It was hard to tell, but I could tell. I started the clap, and he was like, thank you, thank you, thank you. And he carved this ashtray out of a candy. Like, fucking ruled that guy out. Sam Towns book, Running the Light, another grinder, just a different one. All of these are available at artshipper.com this Thailand notebook that's the other one

that I never used maybe I'll bring it with me maybe I'll bring it with me and fill it up it's got a elephant on there and a whatever went to Thailand for the full moon party in 2014. That's where I also got this thing, a t-shirt that I will put on at some point from the Taipei Boxing Stadium. Taipei International Muay Thai Stadium in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I went with my friend Pete. Real Muay Thai fight. It says something on the back. Before a fighter can compete, they must perform an important tradition of Muay Thai, which is the Wai Kru. Wai Kru is an ancient custom to pay the utmost respect to its parents' teachings and the sacred things that the fighter respects. It's also done for protection and victory in the competition. W Crew, oh yeah. So they do this dance. It's almost like honors their,

it almost honors their like dojo kinda. Like if you fought for like, in a jujitsu competition, you were fighting for 10th planet, you'd have like a 10th planet dance that Eddie Bravo would teach you. Y Crew helps stimulate the mind of the fighter to discourage the opponent.

The fighter performed the same form of Y Crew. It means they are from the same headmaster. Then it is unnecessary to fight against each other. At the same time, the bond between the fighters harmoniously secures the love and the loyalty. Wow. Mr. K, that's right, Mr. K, he ran the thing. Mr. K, guarantee.

Telephone, 08-6187-7655. Or if you wanna contact Ms. Rung Napa, telephone [phone]. Or 08-8266-9742. Or email rungnapa.rung.rs at gmail.com. It's a product of Thailand. If you wanna go and find your own Taipei Muay Thai fight, look no further than Mr. K.

Putting on the best fights since before I went to Thailand. Oh yeah, they got him in green too. Grinders in green. Running the Light by Sam Talan. Both covers. Excellent book. Forward by Kyle Talon. Book covers. Excellent book. Forward by Kyle Kanane. Excellent comic.

This is the hat I traded in Cuba for my foundation cigars hat they gave me and I was on a beach in Bobby Kelly and they traded, they're like, let's trade, come be-o. And I was like, for real? And I was like, no, I got this hat. But it was like, oh, I just got this hat. I actually meant to leave it there.

So absolutely, I will trade you a brand new hat for this one on the beach. I was like, keep it, sweaty as shit. I got quotations from Chairman Mao. I also got in China. It's actually got some great quotes in here. Secretary of the party commitment must be good at as a squad leader.

Make trouble, fail, make trouble again, fail again, till their doom. That is the logic of the imperialists and all the reactionaries the world over in dealing with the people's cause. Just because we have won victory we must never relax our vigilance against the frenzied plots for revenge by the imperialists and their running dogs. Whoever relaxes vigilance will disarm himself politically and land himself in a passive position. That was in his address to the preparatory committee.

Wow. Now say whatever you want about him, but he thought his shit out. He thought his shit out. Wasn't like fucking Luke Heggies, if you must know, episode coming, writer of this book. This is the father of the man who helped me in Carnival in Trinidad. He's one of the greatest leaders in Trinidad in history.

He's got a sign up, a photograph up in the airport, Trinidad. And his name carries respect wherever you go. And I went to college with his son. Great basketball fan. And these, Sabro Sendi's book, these some Hershey Kisses I got at the White House. I did a tour with Shane Gillis.

He has friends in the CIA who hooked it up, which is nice or something He knows people there somehow And that's it everybody. I hope you enjoyed today's episode It brought me back to Ecuador for sure oh Fuck mmm. It really did. Neona was going over the episode this time and she goes the first time I ever thought An episode made me go hey I gotta go visit there right now. I have got to go visit and I would say you guys too I would say wait

because the gangs have kind of taken over the country which is sad but all of Latin America goes from un-un-unvisitable to completely El Salvador went from one of the most dangerous countries in the world a few years ago to now safer than Germany and France And obviously the United States It's crazy. So that's open now Ecuador's kind of not they're all open but like, you know, don't Boy we gotta wrap this up. All right, everybody. Thank you very much for tuning in that was the wall I'm gonna give that gotta give that Trippie Award to Colin. Also nominate your own Trippie Awards for next year.

If you're listening in the comments or watching on YouTube, put a comment. I nominate this for Trippie Award Best Meal. I nominate this for Trippie Award Best Drugs. Obviously Carmen Lynch would be up there for Ayahuasca. It's 2025, so it's 2024. So it has to be from january 2025 on um i nominated this trip best trip i nominated this trip you were best pictures what else was

there i forget best trip best pictures best meal the sex uh most adventurous could be the congo could definitely be the congo from fearless and. I mean that was pretty adventurous best trip best guests most surprising Worst trip least adventurous Lewis Gomez got that for a villain, Jamaica worst trip big J got that one for Break it up with his chick while he was in South Africa that was terrible Anyway guys hope you enjoyed the episode nominate your own trip rewards every week. I would nominate this one for best trip to be honest. I would nominate this for best trip. I'm trying to think of as a way to do best meal nomination for Joe List for drinking that tea.

I'll also go maybe Best Pictures, because he had a lot of pictures of these too. Anyway, that's it everybody. Hope you enjoy your life. Until next week. Hasta luego. Got one.