You Be Trippin' - India w/ Louis Katz | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: July 8, 2024

Follow Louis on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/louiskatzcomedy/ SPONSORS: -Refine your style with CUTS Clothing and get 20% off with code TRIPPIN at https://cutsclothing.com/TRIPPIN On th...is episode of You Be Trippin, Louis Katz gets scammed in India being surprisingly doesn’t get sick. On the show, the two talk about hardcore travel and how intense India can be. They also discuss bhang lassi, opium, and dudes holding hands. Other topics include: the Taj Mahal, Varanasi, getting around on little money, and getting your ears cleaned by a guy in the park. Also, Louis claims that the sport of cricket sucks. What do you think? Enjoy! ‌ You Be Trippin' Ep. 22 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://store.ymhstudios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Where you been and where you going? This is Ari's Travel Show, yeah. We're gonna talk about travel today. It's UB Trippin', yeah. Make your nights unforgettable with American Express. Unmissable show coming up? Good news. We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it. Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. And when you get to the main
Starting point is 00:00:32 event, skip to the good bit using the card member entrance. Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash ymx. Benefits vary by card, other conditions apply. Hello everybody, this is my announcer voice. Welcome to You Be Trippin', the podcast that takes you all over the world. The only podcast in the history of recorded stand-up television that takes you all over the world.
Starting point is 00:00:59 Today, my guest is a true traveler, is a hilarious comedian, he's got a new special out on YouTube right now, is a true traveler among comedians, legitimately. One of the only guys in comedy that really fucking gets out there and gets lost. And he'll be on this podcast multiple times. But today's the first.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Please help me welcome my guest at home. Literally clap at home. For Louis Katz, everybody. Hello, thank you, thank you. Aronin, as David Tell calls him, one of my favorite David Tell. Yeah, that is nice. He has no master. Thank you Ronan. Thank you as a David tell calls it my favorite David tell He has no master. I have no master Roll through the comedy dungeons and
Starting point is 00:01:36 Where are we going today Louis? This is so don't Louie. Yeah, you got it, right? You got it right the first three times. I am so I thought I would we would talk about this trip I took after I graduated from college over 20 years ago. Me and a couple buddies spent a month in India. India. Very nice. See what we got right here. India, if you're watching on TV. Yes.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Northern India is where most of you went. It's a huge country. It's huge. It's crazy how long it would take to actually see. I mean, to see all of it would take a year, at least. But even we saw a good part of just the north while we were there. Now, you'll be interested to know see. I mean, to see all of it would take a year at least. But even we saw a good part of just the north while we were there. Now, you'll be interested to know this.
Starting point is 00:02:08 I looked it up. You said I want to go to India for my first one. We'll do other ones too. But India is still there 20 years later. Still a country. So a lot of this will still be relevant. Well, the funny thing is, I'm actually, the weird thing that made me think India with all this
Starting point is 00:02:24 is that I'm reading that book, the Salman Rushdie book, Midnight's Children. OK, is that the one that got him like deathbedded? No, that's Satanic Verses. This is one is, sorry, is about, it's like a story, but it's also about the birth of India. So we're like, India's still there. India's only been a country since 1940 whatever.
Starting point is 00:02:41 Really? An independent country. Does it predate the Jews? Before that, well, it's. How did they getate the Jews? Before that, well, it's. How did they get such a big one? Ha ha ha. They, well, it's been there. It just hasn't been a unified country.
Starting point is 00:02:50 You know what I mean? It's been a unified independent country since 1940 something. Oh, interesting. So that's actually kind of recent when you think about it. Because there's, it's. There's people living there, was living there before. People have been living there for thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of years. My uncle lives in Israel.
Starting point is 00:03:05 I was like, oh no, I remember like scouting out where the British are and trying to like, they needed us to like plant bombs and like to see what's available. Oh yeah, yeah, all that kind of shit. I'm like, what? He goes, yeah, I was 12, this wasn't Israel. Yeah. I'm like, you predate Israel? Yeah, it's crazy.
Starting point is 00:03:17 It's crazy to think that. Yeah, there must be people in India now. Yeah, well I mean, yeah, there's people that predate it for sure. I mean, it's people that predate it for sure. I mean, it's just, well, when I went there, it was honestly, it was like the most intense hardcore traveling I've ever done. Had you been there before? Never been there before since. And I know being a colonizing place is wrong, evil.
Starting point is 00:03:39 But honestly, in the year 2001, just as a tourist, it was hard for me for four weeks. Props to the British for coming there and taking over the whole country. Because I don't know how you could do that. It is an intense wild place. What do you mean? You're talking about smells?
Starting point is 00:03:56 Let's start with smells, I guess. Start with smells. It's just everything. I would say not start with smells, just on top of everything I'm saying, add potential smells on top of that. Okay, okay. I mean, it's just like, I don't even know where to start.
Starting point is 00:04:12 It was part of the reason I wanted to go there was, when I was, you know, I studied abroad in Brazil. Okay. And it was between Brazil and India, not because I knew a lot about them, because I knew nothing about them. They sounded exotic to me. Love them. They sounded exotic to me. They sounded crazy to me.
Starting point is 00:04:26 I just didn't know shit about them. I love that. And in the end, it went with Brazil. And then I was like, you know, Brazil's really cool. But Brazil, For your study abroad? Yes. OK.
Starting point is 00:04:34 Is like kind of like a weird bizarro United States. You know what I mean? It's still kind of similar in a lot of ways. In what ways? What are you talking about, like big cities, McDonald's? Well, it's the new world. It's very, there's a mix of different kinds of people there.
Starting point is 00:04:49 It's not one homogeneous people. So right there, there's a lot of similar things. That's what I say about Australia and Canada. I'm like, it's all, they're all the same. Call it the United States. Call it just a group of whatever. It's just like the animals are a little different. But you're not going to be like, what is this?
Starting point is 00:05:04 Well, Brazil is, well, you've got to say this for the Brazil episode. It's just like the animals are a little different. But you're not going to be like, what is this? Well, Brazil is, we'll have to say this for the Brazil episode. It's way different than that. It's like what I mean, bizarro. It's like, they have like three times as many slaves were brought there, and they kept going with slavery 30 years later than us. Brazil?
Starting point is 00:05:19 Yes. So just as an example. But we'll talk about that another time. Let's get it off this power saving mode. Let's turn this on all the time. OK. There we go. All right.
Starting point is 00:05:29 69. 69. Do you know that's a sexual move? What? 69. Teach me. I'll show you afterwards, but it's like it's reversal of fortune.
Starting point is 00:05:37 And that's all I'll say for now. Reversal of fortune. I don't want to lose the prize for you, but let's just say I haven't showered today. Exciting. So, how old are you when you go there? I'm 21. 21 years old.
Starting point is 00:05:51 Yeah, I'm with two of my buddies. We're 22. We just graduated from college. It's four weeks in India. How much hair do you have? And then two weeks, so much hair. Although while I was there, someone was like, you think too much, you're going to go bald. And they predicted it.
Starting point is 00:06:03 That's what happened. Do you think that's why Jews go bald yeah probably it's all I think you gotta keep it long just to differentiate between the two of us yeah we should have a pact where we have to keep different your bizarre sorry sorry different hair different facial facial hair and head hair at all times but um it was just um so you want with your buddies so one of our buddies and I'm just going there to facial hair and head hair at all times. But it was just, so. You went with your buddies. So we went with our buddies,
Starting point is 00:06:27 and I'm just going there to see something, I wanna see something really different, right? And we actually connected through maybe Thailand first, and then went to India from Thailand. Interesting, okay. Which was, I think that's, I don't know why we did it that way, but I think that's what it was.
Starting point is 00:06:40 I'm in Bangkok for a night, I'm like, this is just like, this isn't that different. As soon as we land. You come from the West Coast, you're in San Francisco, right? Yeah, we're in LA, yeah. I'm like, this isn't that different. As soon as we land. You come from the West Coast. You're in San Francisco, right? Yeah, we're in LA. Yeah. I could see you stopping there.
Starting point is 00:06:49 I think what it was was that because we wanted to end up in Thailand, we bought a six-week round trip and then a cheaper local trip, I think, if I remember correctly. We get to India, and it's automatically just like, it's so different, dude, it's so different. Like. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:07:08 Like what hits you? Well first of all, I plan the whole trip. By the way, the pillow is up to you. Yeah I know, I'm deciding what's comfortable and I'm moving around. They're a little itchy you know? They're a little itchy, that's why they're not in the fucking other room.
Starting point is 00:07:18 I get it. They were relegated to here. Yeah man, I get it, you don't wanna, you rub up against that, you're like ooh, it's a little burlappy. But I, so I plan the whole trip, my friends don't rub up against that, you're like, ooh, it's a little burlappy. So I planned the whole trip. My friends don't plan it at all.
Starting point is 00:07:27 We're like, four weeks in India, we have no plans. Literally, I have. That's the best way to. Well, I mean, go ahead. Yeah, but we only have four weeks. We don't have months and months. You know what I mean? We don't even know what we want to see.
Starting point is 00:07:39 We just have a ticket. We don't even know what's there. You know what I mean? You have to at least know what's there. You know what I mean? Like you have to at least know what's there. So this is pre-internet, so I'm just lonely planet style. You know what I mean? I'm just going through the book on the way there. I'm like, I guess we do this, this, and this.
Starting point is 00:07:55 It is fun to research something on the plane to the place. Yeah, it's pretty crazy. Like I guess we, like, because I didn't know anything. I knew the Taj Mahal. Taj Mahal. That's it. I knew the Taj Mahal. I didn't even know that wasn't in Delhi. You know, I don't know shit. I don't know anything. I knew the Taj Mahal. Taj Mahal? That's it. I knew the Taj Mahal. I didn't even know that wasn't in Delhi. I don't know shit. I don't know anything. So I'm figuring it all out on the way there.
Starting point is 00:08:11 And part of the- Is Delhi the same as New Delhi? New Delhi. I said it. I just made it. I said it. That's a cool way. I said it Delhi, you know, because I was like, you should know. I guess you didn't know. Not that cool. So in the book, they're like, these are the scams you got to watch out for and they warn you about the scams. Wow they have a section of the book about the scams. That's how much they are. Yeah but here's the thing about the crazy thing about the scams is they tell you to watch out for them but once you're in them you're just like oh
Starting point is 00:08:38 this is that scam I read about and it's just happening to you and you don't know how to undo it. What kind of scams were there? So we get there, there's this whole thing about like you got to take the right taxi from the airport, they give you a receipt, don't give them the receipt unless they take you where you're supposed to go, they're going to try and take you to another hotel. Dude, we land there, we get the right taxi, they try to take us to another hotel, they won't take, they say our hotel burned down, they drive us somewhere else. So we're like, this is ridiculous. We're like, we're in the scam.
Starting point is 00:09:08 Yeah, yeah, we're now, oh, this is, oh, that thing I read about, cool, it's happening to us. So we're like, this is ridiculous. We wanna go to our hotel, and they're like, fine, you can get out right here. Now we're like, we're not getting scammed. We're just standing with our bags in the middle of New Delhi, dude.
Starting point is 00:09:23 Here's the problem with the stand your ground against the scams in some foreign place. One, you're scamming probably in some places for about three dollars. Yes. And two, there is a cost sum analysis of I'm not gonna go for this, but I am fucked right now. Where the fuck am I?
Starting point is 00:09:37 How do I even get a cab? Yeah. Well there's also like, I've since changed my philosophy on traveling to places like this, and I was battling it in Italy, sorry, in India, it was different. I just was always constantly like, I'm not trying to get, I don't want to be ripped off because I'm a tourist. And then you realize it's a couple more bucks to them, it's nothing to you, get ripped off.
Starting point is 00:09:58 That's now my philosophy. Because also it's like, how much time am I going to spend and discomfort am I going to take to not get ripped off? It's time, it's discomfort, it's nothing. If it's a simple thing of like, let's just say water's here a dollar and Sal Vulcano will not pay more than a dollar for a water. Oh, I'm by that too.
Starting point is 00:10:14 He's a billionaire. Yeah, and they're like dollar 50. He goes, no, it's a dollar. And they're like, sir, dollar 50. Like, it's Central Park, man, it's a dollar 50. And he goes, then I'll move on. And they're like, here's a millionaire who will go thirsty because of the dollar.
Starting point is 00:10:24 But the thing, I mean, just specifically in New York, if you say, if you start putting it back, 90% of the time they'll say, fine, it's a dollar. So there is a moment where you could go, where they're like, hey, let's say water costs a dollar somewhere and they go, $2. And now you're on vacation. Even if every single time they charge you jobs,
Starting point is 00:10:40 it's gonna add another 12 year trip. But just go, there's a moment you can go, no, no, no, one, and then go, okay. You can take that moment. It's not like you have to just give in to every scam. But you don't go super hard. They're like two or nothing. They're like, just give it to me.
Starting point is 00:10:53 But it's India, so it's like, this should be 30 cents, not 70 cents. It's like, what, like, who cares, man? And that's maybe not exactly, I don't know the exchange rate, but my friend did say today today I was asking him about it According to his memory or what he remembers besides flights We spent he spent five hundred dollars in our month in India, which I don't know if that's right
Starting point is 00:11:14 But that's what he remembers which is pretty crazy. Yeah, do you think it's a Jewish thing or everybody? We're like, guess how much this meal cost? I Don't know but it's definitely a Jewish thing. I mean, this is my cheapest Jewish friend. I feel like it's not just Jewish. Oh, he's also Jewish? Yeah, he's also Jewish. I feel like it's not just Jewish because other people are like,
Starting point is 00:11:33 when we had those almuerses in Ecuador, they have them other places, I guess. Lunch? A prefixed lunch. Yeah. Fresh juice. Nice. Main, two sides, sometimes dessert.
Starting point is 00:11:43 And you're like, how much was it? You know, like 250. And you're like, no was it? You know, like 250 like no fucking way We're you're both like no way. Maybe I'm more because I'm Jewish, but it's interesting. I got me so high right now Back to India back to India. Um So anyway, then they take us to the hooks for the month. Yeah, and this is granted like in retrospect, I think Honestly, like it took I felt like going to India was kind of like what you hear about women when they're pregnant. They have to forget about how bad it was to then say,
Starting point is 00:12:12 I kind of want to be pregnant again. It was a hardcore month. And only a few years later was like, I want to go back. Because it really is the most interesting place I've ever been. So that first scam. So luckily, another taxi comes by by they take us to the hotel but then I'm just telling you like 10 minutes out in the streets in Delhi or
Starting point is 00:12:30 anywhere else in India is like you like walk around for like 10 minutes and then you come back to your hotel you close the doors you're like that was so intense it's overwhelming dude it's so loud there's so much noise there's so many people it's so chaotic everyone's's so much noise. There's so many people. It's so chaotic. Everyone's trying to sell things to you. Or they sell things by grabbing your hand. That's the things they will grab your hand.
Starting point is 00:12:54 What? Yeah, dude. Like, all right, so I actually found this video. Do it, do it, do it. I mean, what am I? I'm just walking? Am I reaching? They're just like my friend.
Starting point is 00:13:01 Or maybe they'll put something on you or something like that. The sale is halfway done by the time you can say no. So the first, I read this in my notes today and I forgot this happened the very first day. We're walking around New Delhi, we pass through a park, a guy walks out from behind a bush and he's like, my name is Muhammad Ali, I'm an ear cleaner,
Starting point is 00:13:19 would you like your ears cleaned in the park? Do you see what I'm saying? Like, I don't know how to respond to that. I don't know the right price. I don't know if I need my ears cleaned. I'm just thinking about this park. It's like, get away from me. Get away. Yes. It was funny. The cool thing is that they were like, this is pre-internet, but they were already ahead of time with reviews because he had a book of testimonials of people saying like Muhammad Ali is the greatest of all time, he cleaned my ears. I remember one guy wrote, Muhammad Ali gave me an ear abortion like they were saying. And dude, you're like how are you going to clean my ears? It's a fucking kebab
Starting point is 00:13:58 skewer. It's a metal spear. That is you're just going to let some dude in the park just go to town. Who doesn't have to go by any sort of like FCC laws. No. Right. Isn't the FCC for broadcasting? Whatever it is, you know what I mean, ADA, whatever. The American Dental Association has nothing to do
Starting point is 00:14:16 with this guy's ear cleaning. It's like the took-tokes or whatever, get my motorcycle and I'll drive you somewhere. It's like, these aren't regulated by the government, it's some guy. Well you just gotta assume that like people, it's bad business to fuck people up and you don't wanna get in trouble with the law or anything.
Starting point is 00:14:30 So there's that, but I'm just saying like- And most people don't wanna just deafen someone. Yes, but I'm just not letting a dude in the park go to town on my ears. I'm not, like no, it's like, I was like, third generation, dude you'd think by third generation you'd get a kiosk at the mall or something besides a bush in the park
Starting point is 00:14:48 to sell your ear cleaning wares. I'm saying that. Hey everybody, Ari Shaffir here to wish you a happy July 4th. Don't blow your fucking finger off this year, how about? You're down two already from the last two years. I get it, it's a birthday, but why do you gotta blow your fucking finger off?
Starting point is 00:15:04 Anyway, I'm here to tell you about Louis Katz. He's a great comedian and maybe you've never heard of him His new special is out right now on YouTube called the best comedian you've never heard of and it might be true He's one of the top 20 underrated comedians lists. Yeah him Soder God, there's a lot Sean Patton. Maybe you tell He's rated but he's underrated too. I don't know man, Doug, there's a bunch of people. He's also gonna be performing in Edinburgh this year. I won't be there, but he will be.
Starting point is 00:15:34 I know you're gonna be looking for a show and I'm telling you for a fact that's a fucking winner. If you're going to Edinburgh, you should check out Louis Katz at the Counting House at 8.30 p.m. every day. Stay sober just long enough to see Louis Katz. Finish off getting drunk. Start with the two at the show, and then keep it going and get fucking,
Starting point is 00:15:49 throw up drunk like you were meant to at the Edinburgh Fringe Comedy Festival. It's his first time there. Wish him good luck, bring him some weed. I don't think he smokes anymore. Put some fucking money in his bucket. God, just check out the show. Counting house, 8.30 p.m., guaranteed.
Starting point is 00:16:04 It's gonna be a fucking good time. I don't deliver that much. I don't deliver that message much. He's also gonna be doing Edinburgh preview shows in Eau Claire, Wisconsin, Brea at the Improv, July 10th, July 25th and 26th, at the Brooklyn Comedy Club in Brooklyn, New York. Check out all his tour dates at luicats.com.
Starting point is 00:16:25 For myself, I just want to wish you a happy July 4th and don't do mushrooms. You know why? Because we got Shroomfest coming up. July 20th, 21st, and 22nd. I'm gonna fucking burn. Yeah, get into those. Get on that, guys. Just take some mushrooms and do them during that day and join us.
Starting point is 00:16:43 There's also, I got Shroomfest shirts available, for me my own profit, but for the profit of the universe The guy the artist all the proceeds go to the artist at abracadabra Really cool fucking designs on that shroom fest shirt this year get them at Ari Shaffir Dot-com slash merch where you can also find a link to the patreon patreon.com slash Ari Shaffir and also grinders vinyls and so forth and so on and sign up for the mailing list guys Let's get back to the fucking episode. I'm burning out here. I can't break in anymore subscribe before I do wherever you're watching or listening Hit subscribe. No, let's get back to the fucking episode. There's like um there's it's a city, but there's animals I can't remember there's what I was in Delhi enough. There's cows. There's monkeys, dude
Starting point is 00:17:19 I mean you travel enough to know that monkeys very cute, but very evil You don't know how to deal with them. do service him steal anything. Oh fuck. Yeah, dude They go and everywhere had different monkey advice some of them like you got to stare them down other ones are like never Yes, so I've heard both don't take their picture like They're a crew it's a bunch of monkeys. In Hong Kong, they said, oh, better put your, don't take any plastic bags out. You have to keep them in your, non-visible.
Starting point is 00:17:53 OK, that makes sense. Plastic bags as foods in there, just grab it. And then monkeys, once you put your lips on something, the whites are just like, take it. I don't want it anymore. So they just touch the straw of a Starbucks thing, that Starbucks thing is theirs. All they gotta do is touch it.
Starting point is 00:18:09 I mean, that's the thing, is like, you don't wanna get, I mean, a touch from a monkey, you're like, what disease did I just get, you know what I mean? Monkeypox. Yeah, monkeypox, the new AIDS, who knows what it is. I'm not saying that monkeypox is the new AIDS, I'm saying they could also give you the new AIDS. Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:24 It's all on the table with monkeys like like here's an example like gouging your eyes out what it's always a possibility monkeys it's like I'm strong yeah but like here's a this is an India thing this didn't happen while I was there but this is a story that like kind of encapsulates like what going to India was like they had a monkey problem I forget if it was in Delhi or in a city in in in in India their answer to the monkey problem I forget if it was in Delhi or in a city in in in India their answer to the monkey problem bigger guard monkeys you see what I'm saying like this is what's going on in certain parts of this of this country like it's
Starting point is 00:18:57 intense dude and like like all right think of the craziest homeless person you ever seen in New York uh-huh so So I'm today. All right, cool. Now, think of him covered in boils, wearing a diaper, holding a trident. Do you see what I'm saying? Everything is next level. It's next level. It's like a super villain. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:19:16 It's just, it's just, it's just, everything was just super, super intense. How long till you got over the like, the what the fuckness of it all? Never. Never. It was just like you're getting ready to leave for the airport. Wait so we're like going around so that's one scam that happens to me then like I'm walking around one day. How'd you get to your hotel? Then another taxi happened to be driving by we're like take us to the hotel and they took us so
Starting point is 00:19:40 thank God that happened. So those airport taxis are the ones. Yeah, well, you know what was dumb was we didn't follow with the whole thing. This is also like, we're also like 21 and not sure how to really assert ourselves properly. Like the whole key with it was that you don't give them the receipt until they take you where you want to go. And I think we'd already given them the receipt. Is that, can I get the receipt please? Yeah. I thought we weren't supposed to, but okay.
Starting point is 00:20:00 Yeah, yeah, exactly. Right, you're not supposed to. Well, you have to get every, all three people on the same page. In New York, it's like, put the meter on. Yeah. And because it's like, yeah, exactly. Right. You're not. Well, you have to get every all three people in New York. It's like put the put the meter on. Yeah. And because it's like, oh, he just forgot. It's like he forgot on purpose. Oh, dude, my guy at the airport the other day was like banging on the meter pretending like it was broken. He's like this thing. It doesn't work. How much would you pay me? I'm like, I'm like, hey, no big deal, man. I'll just write down your medallion number and I'll call it in. And then it works. It's
Starting point is 00:20:23 magic. So I just didn't know how to be a little bit more, as far as giving with. This thing doesn't work. Oh my god, what? I don't know. Jesus, dude. I live here. Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:20:35 But I would be giving with the money and then a little more forceful with that tax. Not forceful, just like, it's just all three dudes have to be on the same page. You know what I mean? So it was hard to communicate. So then I'm walking around we're walking around deli and a guy saddles up next to me points down at my shoe I look down at my shoe there's a piece of shit
Starting point is 00:20:57 I just want to make sure you're still on yeah there's a piece of shit perfectly centered on my shoe another one of the scams that I read about. So what they do is they shit shoe you. You never heard, this never happened to you? You got shit shoeing, man, it's a real scam. They walk up, somehow they have perfect aim with this shit. It's like a pile of shit right on your shoe. Then they happen to be shoe cleaners.
Starting point is 00:21:24 They happen to be shoe cleaners. They happen to be shoe cleaners. So they're like, hey man, looks like you need your shoes cleaned. And you do. Oh no, I read about this scam. So now I'm just- But it's too late, you already got me the shit on my shoe. I do need it cleaned up. That's what I'm saying, dude.
Starting point is 00:21:36 I didn't, I'm like, I'll clean it myself. I'm not falling for this. There's no way out of it once you got shit shoeed. I mean, dude, and I'm a germaphobe. So I'm like, I clean off the shoe, I had to like, I marinated the shoe in like, in hand sanitizer, you know what I mean? Like I was like, I have to wear this at the beginning of my trip. Oh, it's also not like a high level shit. It's not a Wall Street shit. No. It's a New Delhi fucking recycled shit.
Starting point is 00:21:59 It's a perfect, but their aim is like, it's a perfect dollop right there like perfect like there's none on your pants There's not anywhere else So like I'm like wow every scam that they warn us about is happening right so by now I'm like paranoid about it now the last game that they read about was a Hotel restaurant will poison your food Poison your food then they call the paramedics, they gotta deal with the hospital, they get in on the medical bill,
Starting point is 00:22:31 and you gotta go to the hospital and you come back. So now I'm fucking paranoid about that, right? I go to, yeah, right? So I'm like, this is gonna happen to me. And I read about that and I go, after these tooth scans happen, I'm like, I gotta be on the lookout for scams. I go to a restaurant, they just keep giving me rice.
Starting point is 00:22:47 They keep giving me rice. I'm like this rice is poisoned. They're trying to poison me. Only afterwards I realize I'm in India. Of course they're giving me rice. No one is poisoning me with the rice. Like I know I'm just, I'm just in the level of paranoia I'm at.
Starting point is 00:23:00 Yeah, because you've already been scammed twice. I've already been scammed twice. These are all coming true. Both my friends got crazy sick. I'm the only one who didn't get sick. I want to talk about that for sure. That seems like a rite of passage in India specifically. Well, dude, it's like, so their toilets are
Starting point is 00:23:13 Asian-style toilets with just the hole and the two foot marks on either side. That's another thing I want to talk about. And it's like. Had you ever seen these before? It might have been new to me then. I mean, I knew about it going into it, but I wasn't sure how. So my friend, my one friend's got a big ass so
Starting point is 00:23:29 his center of gravity is fucked up. He's a tall dude with a big ass you know so it was very difficult for him to do this. If you were properly um... Trained? Fibered up. Oh yeah. And you got the thigh muscles it's actually it is a cleaner dump. They say that. I say that it is a cleaner They say that I say that it is they say that Dude, the fact that your cheeks are coming together and creating a war shock test out of your dookie is Disgusting is bad. Yeah when you're squatting wide open. It's just like a direct direct shot now whether I then want to afterwards Wash my asshole with my bare hand in water.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Just dump, it's from a water bucket that someone else has dipped their hand in after touching their shitty ass. So you, water's not like a running water, sometimes it is. But it's just like, where's this water from even? I don't even want to touch my hand. And then put that in, and you got to like, kind of. Yeah, yeah. And then right back in the water.
Starting point is 00:24:24 I bring a paper everywhere I go. I the water. I bring paper everywhere I go. I roll up paper, toilet paper, everywhere I go. But then where do you put the toilet paper afterwards? There's a trash can usually in there also, you know what I mean? How bad does that trash can smell? Well, I was used to that from Brazil, because Brazil also...
Starting point is 00:24:38 Has the same? It's not that, they just, their plumbing is bad, so they say to not flush the paper. So I'm used to there being a tiny, stinky trash can. I think the United States is in the minority. Yes garbage disposal. Yeah so anyway I'm just like my friends I'm I don't know what made me never got diarrhea I I started someone told me to take garlic pills every day a garlic supplement I don't know if that's what did it but my
Starting point is 00:25:05 friends got so sick that by the end I was just so not trying to be sick that I was only eating naan like just bread like just the bread nothing my friends look like like Freddie Mercury at the end of buying the music you know I mean like they stay sick no they got better it was funny when they were when they were sick one guy gave his advice he was like he was like yogurt poison kills poison we're like whoa but they they they both got like I mean it's also because you're like that sick and there's not a toilet to aim it down sometimes these shits would just be like Pollock's the bathroom would be Pollocked, dude.
Starting point is 00:25:46 It was bad news. They both lost so much weight. But before all this, so there's like, that's all happening. So they both get sick, and I'm getting nervous about it. You could also always get an English breakfast, which is like toast, eggs, beans. Would you get those? Yeah, in the morning, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:02 I mean, that's the thing is, everywhere I go, I'm like, I want to eat like the locals do. You know what, after two weeks, a month of that, it's like, I don't eat like this. It's not about eating American food, it's about eating a variety of foods. Like I don't eat any kind of one. Like how many- Yeah, what did you eat? Where did you eat there? Like street stalls, restaurants?
Starting point is 00:26:23 All kinds of places, all kinds of restaurants. You know, we tried to ask the people what they liked and I mean, it's strange enough I can't remember the food as much, but one thing I did do was I tried a This thing called banglassy, do you know what banglassy? I know lassi is like the milkshake-y kind of shit. Yeah, it's the yogurt drink. Banglassy is when they mix up a hashish and you get fucked up. What? So, yeah, so supposedly you can order these banglases. And the weird thing about India is there's parts
Starting point is 00:26:52 that are like, there's like a Muslim state where you can't even drink. And then some states you can buy opium from a government store. That's the range within India, right? Wow. So, in some places, I don't think this, I had banglase, so bangsey's hashees mixed with water
Starting point is 00:27:06 so these dudes are showing us around um... i think jaipur which is in rajasthan it's like this red city like the state rajasthan's the state yeah it's kinda like uh... if you make there's like a triangle of like common tourist places in goa is a big one we'll see where delhi is up there this map is very old
Starting point is 00:27:23 uh... but uh... uh... uh... is a big one. Well, see where Delhi is up there? Uh-huh. This map is very old. But Delhi, and then if you go left, there's Jaipur. And if you go right, there's Agra, which is where the Taj Mahal is. That's a very common tourist thing to do. It's very small. That would be only like this much of it. But we saw more than that. We also ended up going all the way to, not to Calcutta but we went like we went through the north through here so
Starting point is 00:27:47 anyway we go to this place Jaipur these people are showing us around that they didn't they just glommed onto us by they'll just go which people just like a dude in the street will like try and be a tour guide notice like makes there's something up and be like how come I remember what he said was like how come Americans hate us so much like they'll put something on you that will make you wanna say like, why don't you be defensive and be friendly to them? And then you gotta be nice to them, do you see what I mean?
Starting point is 00:28:12 Like it's a whole thing. It's like these scammers, not the scammers, but the ones who just want you to sign their fucking, you know, be kind to animals or vote, whatever. And they go, hi, nice day today, isn't it? And you're like, oh yeah, it's like, hey, were you voting this year? And you're like, oh you motherfucker, you fake nice to me. No, no., it's like, hey, were you voting this year? And you're like, oh, you motherfucker.
Starting point is 00:28:25 You fake-niced me. No, no. So that's what they do. They figure out a way just to get in. Yeah, well, and so the show is around. They're like gonna take us to, I'm like, do you know where they at Bing last year? Okay, we know a place.
Starting point is 00:28:36 Take us to this little hole in the wall place. And when I say little hole in the wall, I mean literally. Hole in the middle of a wall, dude. This dude is sitting there. I don't know how he got in. What? Hole in the wall. It's a hole in the middle of a wall dude this dude is sitting there I don't know how I got in there's a single light bulb he's like the bang lassie it's how she so it looks like mud he's about to mix it up I'm like please use my bottle of water like he's just mixing mud into my water like what and I drink it and I get like really high I got I got super
Starting point is 00:29:04 high it was it was it was kind of good yeah it was good so we did that once like took can you just I get the hash part yeah water is disgusting yeah yeah please but the way I mean it was just it was mixing do I want his slurry mixed with his water or my water it was all gross so we did that there I'm trying to think what else guys let's be honest I think most men in America wear a t-shirt every day of their lives if they could but they can't because we wear a t-shirt Doesn't look stylish. Yeah, you look like a young child trying to fit in into a young child's world Yeah, but with cuts clothing they make stylish breathable
Starting point is 00:29:41 Comfortable t-shirts that make you feel dressed up, not down, like me. You show up for a date dressed like me in some fucking Rooker t-shirt that's got holes in it from use over the years that fucking breaking everything down. Yeah, they go, are you trying to look like a child? Stylish, breathable, wrinkle-free wear that you guys can all enjoy. I love it myself. Wear them all the time.
Starting point is 00:30:04 Who doesn't love a fucking discount? Cutts Clothing's got you covered. Embrace the summer state of mind with Cutts. For a limited time, you'd be trippin' listeners, get 20% off your entire order when you use the code TRIPPIN at checkout. That's 20% off your order at cuttsclothing.com with promo code TRIPPIN.
Starting point is 00:30:19 Yeah, that's right. C-U-T-S-CLOTHING.COM. Support the show. Tell them I sent you. Experience a perfect blend of style and comfort with cutsclothing.com. Take your life back. Now let's get back to the episode.
Starting point is 00:30:35 Oh man, we, and the place with the opium, that was like, that was awesome. You took opium? Yes, we like, it was like, it came in like these little like balls, rubber balls. How much was it? Do you remember? Everything was little like balls, rubber balls. How much was it? Do you remember? Everything was cheap.
Starting point is 00:30:46 Nothing, pretty much. Yeah. OK. And you put it in this tea and you just kind of drink it. And like, dude, that opium, it's like, dude, you're like, I get why they fought a war over this. What's the feeling? This shit is great.
Starting point is 00:30:58 Oh, it feels so good. It feels like you're sinking into velvet, man. It feels so good. You know all those hair? it's like stoned, but warmer and deeper. You have weird dreams a little bit on it? Oh, also we're all on anti-malaria pills, so we're having crazy anti-malaria dreams on top of it.
Starting point is 00:31:15 Actually dreams, vivid dreams. Yes, very vivid dreams. Yeah, the malaria pill. That mixed with, sometimes, I don't know, if you had this quitting weed, which right about the eight day mark anyway, if you quit weed, then you're like the dream start, the malaria and that, it's nuts.
Starting point is 00:31:29 Vivid, it's weird, they were always like violent dreams. And I had very violent dreams, I had very violent dreams. I remember one I had, there was, you know that Dolly, Salvador Dali painting where there's like the spindly elephants. I had like a spindly elephant like come at me and my family and like gore one of us in my dream. It like seems so real.
Starting point is 00:31:53 Well, I could remember it. I mean like that's the, and then I had one where like, you remember Baron Munchausen? There's like an angel of death who's like a black feathered wings and like a skeleton. And it was like him, the angel of death who's like a black feathered wings and like a skeleton and it was like him the angel of death like holding me in a headlock like repeatedly shooting me in the head with a gun it was intense anyway so those are the dreams I would have but um let me think what else oh so we go to we go to Agra where we see the Taj Mahal it's beautiful this is the
Starting point is 00:32:20 craziest thing so one of my friends is redhead dude instead of looking at the Taj Mahal although because there's India so big is there mostly mostly it's beautiful. This is the craziest thing. So one of my friends is redhead dude. Instead of looking at the Taj Mahal, all the cause there's India. So because they're mostly mostly it's Indian tourists. They're looking at him because they never seen a redhead before they're like, they want to take pictures with him. It was like, they were just so blown away to see a redhead Indian tourists go, let's go to the big, it's like the Smithsonian. We go to the Smithsonian. And it's like foreigners too, but it's all, that's an American thing to go to. Yes. Wow. So Taj Mahal is all people from small town India.
Starting point is 00:32:47 Yeah, I mean it's just like, why not go see the Taj Mahal? It's incredible. And they'll see a redhead. Were they taking pictures with him? Oh yeah, they were blown away. They wanted to touch it. They were just like, what is this?
Starting point is 00:32:55 Isn't that the craziest thing? Yeah. You feel like a celebrity. Yeah, oh and the other thing that's funny is that like, Indian dudes, you've probably seen it sometimes here, where sometimes they'll like dye their hair henna red, like it looks really funny. It's like not a realistic red,
Starting point is 00:33:07 but like they would always like, they'd like give him props like, hey what's up? Did I have a monk in Myanmar? He goes to me, bald monk, I shaved my head before I moved out there. And he's like, hey! Like, we're the same.
Starting point is 00:33:21 I was like, sweet. I was like a foot and a half taller than him. Wow, yeah they a picture of you. We had that in somewhere outside a big temple. And it was like all these blonde chicks from Canada. And they were lined up. And it was like, yeah, people have never seen that. Yeah, it's incredible.
Starting point is 00:33:35 It's incredible, dude. And I mean, oh, then we like, so for a big part of this trip, we just hired our own driver. We had our own driver. It was that affordable. I mean, dude, we had a pedicab at one point, a bicycle, I forget what they're called, a tuk-tuk there, whatever they called.
Starting point is 00:33:50 Maybe they called something different there. We asked him, we said, my friend was just fucking around. He was like, how much to go to Nepal? And he quoted a surprise. He would have taken us by bike to another country, dude. Oh, wow. He was like, all right, well. He was like, I mean, which is kind of rude to ask,, dude. All right, well. He was like, I mean, which is kind of rude to ask,
Starting point is 00:34:08 because clearly the guy needed the money. And he's like, no. He goes, OK, fine, half price. I'm like, no, no, I actually am not going to Nepal. A quarter price. I'm like, oh, dude, I'm sorry. They're so desperate. How about I just give you a dollar?
Starting point is 00:34:17 I'll name my son after you then. Oh, we also got like this guy that my friend worked for was like he got it get their native clothes that um... i forget the name of the men's clothes maybe even call them pajamas but they look like pajamas you mean like it's like the drama being a indian word is a bit is indian word is indian word pajama there's a few other words that like that
Starting point is 00:34:40 sing was like a um... a collar but but like a like a t-shirt collar, but button down here. You know what I mean? And then flowy pants. So we got tailor-made outfits like that. Sick. Like, are we going to fit in? No, we don't fit in more.
Starting point is 00:34:57 We look ridiculous. It's this theory that my friend told me he didn't want to take his camera around. He was a photographer guy because he didn't want to seem like a tourist. And they're like, well, man, what do you think you't want to seem like a tourist. And they're like, well man, what do you think you're gonna seem like as a six foot white guy in Indonesia?
Starting point is 00:35:08 Do you think you're not gonna seem like a tourist? And he was like, yeah, what am I doing? Just leading into it. Yeah, it is what it is. So we finally. I love that feeling though of like, I don't wanna seem like a tourist. Yeah. What is that?
Starting point is 00:35:19 Well, everyone hates tourists. But you are a tourist. You are. You can't not be a tourist. You just got to try and be the most respectful tourist. So then we go to another temple in Kajirao, where it's like this ancient temple, and then carved in the side of the temple are all the Kama Sutra moves.
Starting point is 00:35:35 So it's like this like, yeah. No way. Yeah, it's the Aixin Temple of Porn. It's incredible. Yeah, it's awesome. Wow. Yeah. But then they're so conservative.
Starting point is 00:35:43 Dude, we never saw any women, hardly any women in the streets. Well, first of all, when you see a woman, the saris are so beautiful, from the rich to the poor. Dude, you see them kind of party sometimes, or Indian restaurants, when they're dressed up. And you're like, damn, you guys look nice. But this isn't even dressed up.
Starting point is 00:35:58 It's like the average working class farmer lady is wearing the most magnificent, beautiful outfit. And also, so you never see women and it's like after not seeing women for that long, at some point we saw a movie, which I'll get into a second. Someone shows an ankle and you're like, damn, look at that ankle. You haven't seen women. I also call them a young dude. I call it golf course syndrome. What? Golf course?
Starting point is 00:36:23 Golf course syndrome. Because women don't really play golf. So when you're on the golf course, you're just around men, old Asian guys, young white guys, and then you see a woman, 44-year-old fucking mother of two, two fairways over. Within an hour, you already got golf course. And we're like, ooh, she's showing some knee. It's not even like you're faking.
Starting point is 00:36:40 You really are now turned on because there's none. 100%, dude. That ankle was fucking hot. Was doing it, yeah. So, but anyway, so we rent the car, we go, we see the Kamasutra temple, and then they drive us all the way to Varanasi, which is the city on the Ganges,
Starting point is 00:36:57 where they like, where they take the dead. The dead, wow, you saw that. Dude, Varanasi was my favorite place. It's so trippy, man, it's so crazy. You saw them putting out the dead bodies? We could smell them, you could smell them, because they burned them and they put them out there. And not only that, so what happens there is-
Starting point is 00:37:12 The River Ganges. Yeah, yeah, and then they got temples up and down it, and it has this really, it's weird, man. Certain places have this weird, like, ancient, like, kind of haunted feeling. New Orleans kind of feels that way a little bit. And this is weird to compare those two, because they're very different.
Starting point is 00:37:30 But it just had this very ancient, weird vibe there. And also- Gods of America says New Orleans in the book Gods of America. Says New Orleans is actually not part of America by the gods. Oh, I can see that. It's in the borders, but it's not. It's actually a different place than America. Yeah, it's a, yeah, it is on, it's like, it's actually the borders, but it's not. It's actually a different place than America.
Starting point is 00:37:45 Yeah, it's actually the only one of the few places that really has maintained their own culture within America, but that's a whole nother thing. Shit, you could do New Orleans stories on this. I could do New Orleans, yeah. So what happens is, if you're poor and you want to be buried there, if you die in front of someone's storefront,
Starting point is 00:38:05 they gotta pay for your funeral. So there's all these people that are trying to like, that are going there to die, so they can have this kind of burial where they get. And so the storefront guy's like, get out of here. Yeah. I'm like, get out of here.
Starting point is 00:38:16 Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it's like, you know, I mean, just like you're in an internet cafe, oh, the cows that are walking around, free, dude. These cows, I mean, I don't know if they're, it felt like the Asian cows are like bigger than American cows. Dude, and they're so big.
Starting point is 00:38:31 It's like a dinosaur. I mean, it's like a tank, man. They're huge. So there's that. What was the smell of the dead bodies? It's like burnt, like burning, what's burning? Barbecue? Yes, like a burny, ashy smell.
Starting point is 00:38:44 Did you see them? I think so, yeah, I mean, no, I don't know if I saw a pile of bodies or anything like that. It wasn't like, it's like sand warm. Well, they do one by one, they take out a pile, chuck it on the fire. I think they just, you gotta just smell it. I'm sure it was a little more private.
Starting point is 00:38:56 Is it like one of those things where it's a boat and they set the boat on fire? No, no, that's Vikings, that's Vikings. That's some other shit. I think they just burn them up, ash them up and then throw the ashes in there. So maybe there's an incinerator, like I didn't see the exact workings of them So then I'm walking around this ancient city like ancient like and there's all these like all these different temples on the side of this
Starting point is 00:39:12 River and this guy comes up to us. He's like You want to see pictures of Goldie Hawn and we're like fuck. Yeah, we do and this is this guy's sales pitch, is that Goldie Hawn goes to this dude Papu's silk shop, he's got all these pictures with Goldie Hawn, and that's how he gets you to go to the silk shop, and then we went to the silk shop and bought all this silk from Papu, cause he's down with Goldie Hawn.
Starting point is 00:39:37 Wow. Yeah, it was a, that was a trip. And it was just, oh, so that's where we go to see this movie, Gidar, which is the number one top-grossing film in India that year, I believe. It's in the theater there. Bollywood, like a Bollywood movie? Dude, movie theaters in general in foreign countries
Starting point is 00:39:56 are a great way to show the difference in your culture in someone else's. The way people do movies. It's, sitting down to watch this movie was the most physically difficult thing I've ever done in my life. Why? We got seats upstairs, there's no air conditioning.
Starting point is 00:40:15 It's hot, that's number one. It's three hours long, dude, just sitting there was like unbearable. What snacks do they have? Dude, it was just a hard, it was hard to get in. This movie was hot, man. It was hard to get a ticket. We're getting in there.
Starting point is 00:40:29 It's like... It's like Titanic, week one. Yeah, man. So it's about, it's like this action drama that takes place during the partition when Pakistan split from India, when there's all this like violence, stuff like that. Dude, do you think gun violence in movies is bad?
Starting point is 00:40:42 Try sword violence. It's so hardcore. They're just going through this train just hacking fools, man. Wow. It's like crazy. And then there's a song. You know? The nail dance?
Starting point is 00:40:52 Yeah, man. I mean, just that. What a weird part of Bollywood. They're just like, you got to dance. They love the musical. And they've loved them long. I haven't seen that RRR movie yet. Have you seen that this year?
Starting point is 00:41:01 Is that new? Yeah. People love it. They say it's amazing. You ever heard about this? If you got to see it from what I hear, I haven't seen it, but people are just going nuts for it. Why? Let's turn that air back on. It's supposed to be really good. It's supposed to be like
Starting point is 00:41:12 a Bollywood one that's very entertaining, that's long, but the action is dope. It's just got to get it off this like a... Cool. Yeah, there we go. Oh my God. No, get it off the eco. The eco. The eco. No, no, not that one. No, no. there we go. Oh my god. No, get it off the eco. The eco. No, no, not that one. No, no. There we go.
Starting point is 00:41:29 There it is. So let me think, what else? So wait, wait, wait. OK, so hot in there? Were people talking during the movie? I don't remember. It's tough, 20 years ago. I just remember it being so draining.
Starting point is 00:41:44 Maybe there was nowhere to even get water. How was the food? Was the food spicy? Was the food, was the food? Dude, the food, I tell you the spiciest food I had was just on the airline getting there. It was the spiciest food I've ever had. It was like, I can't even eat this. This hurts.
Starting point is 00:41:55 Really? Like it's painful. Yeah, it was, this food was so spicy. I remember it being very good. I wish I was like, I just kinda got, I got scared. I'll be honest, I got scared after my friends got so sick. I got scared to eat to be more adventurous. Like I just didn't want it seems so bad. I mean,
Starting point is 00:42:10 you don't want to get that food poisoning for food poisoning. Just it just sucks. diarrhea barfing combined. Yes, yes, exactly. Both holes exploding. And then you're like, I need to take this pill. But I'm like, I got to hold this pill down at least 20 minutes to get into my system. And that I can't that means I can't have any water with it, because that's a sip of water. You've got to follow it right from a barf
Starting point is 00:42:28 to quickly eat it. Yeah, man. It was nuts. Because you don't want to be picking a half-barfed pill out of a shit-squat toilet in India. Were there any chicks there? Did you hook up with anybody? No, there was no women.
Starting point is 00:42:40 There was no women. Where did you stay? Hostels? Yeah, we stayed at levels up from hostels. You know what I mean? So it's all like we always had our own room and our bathroom did you meet other travelers mmm not really man I mean oh on the way back this is like so then so then we take the train to our last stop which is Puri where they have this Jagannath festival which is where the
Starting point is 00:42:59 word juggernaut comes from Jagannath they pull basically these like giant like towers on wheels and they pull these things through the streets and it's like a crazy parade. So there's all these like Hare Krishnas but like white Hare Krishnas. I think, I don't know if all Hare Krishna are white. Anyway what we would think of is like Hare Krishnas there to see that festival. So we go there, you know, you ride on these trains, you reserve a seat, you reserve a bed, so they're like beds that fold down and fold up.
Starting point is 00:43:27 But if you don't like occupy the whole bed, someone will just come and sit down next to you and just put their shit on your bed. What are you talking about, a train from one city to another? So you take these long ass trains, you know, this crazy train system in India. So, you know, what it is is like,
Starting point is 00:43:44 it's three levels of cots. And you don't get the room? No, no. There's three on one side, three on the other side. We couldn't get our own, we just didn't get our own room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you know, you fold those top ones up during the day. So you can sit, so now you have a bench.
Starting point is 00:43:59 You all sit, so you three sit down, and then you can lie on them. But if we did not not if you didn't if you like brought your knees up while you were sleeping bag or person at the end of your bed Bible when you woke up no like you had to like take what really yes yes what what could some people don't get a seat it's just like yeah they're just like I'll shut it there's like fuck it I'm this is a good space boom like you're not taking it up what are you gonna do you're not taking like
Starting point is 00:44:24 what am I gonna do I'm not gonna do anything I didn't do shit so so that so They're just like, fuck it, this is a good space. Boom, you're not taking it up. What are you going to do? You're not taking it up. I'm like, what am I going to do? I'm not going to do anything. I didn't do shit. So we take that the whole way there. Then we do the, this is where we do the opium. I remember the guidebook said people get a purie paralysis. And I think it's through the opium,
Starting point is 00:44:39 where they don't go somewhere else. It's like on a beach. It's Keyes' disease. What? You ever hear of Keyes' disease? No. From the Florida Keys? Oh, yes. Just drink all day, dude. Why not? It's Keyes a beach. And it was disease. What you ever hear of keys disease? No, from the Florida Keys. Oh, yes. Just drink all day, dude. Why not? Keys disease. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, except it's opium. So we're like, it's like so cool. So
Starting point is 00:44:54 this is like, I never thought you were cool before now. Oh, thank you. The super walking on like this is just like, I remember I have like we're walking on the beach the pigs beach pigs and his lady comes up to us has a small hammerhead shark tries to sell it to us
Starting point is 00:45:12 i don't know how much again i don't know the price for a hammerhead shark i don't know what to do with a hammerhead shark it's like this one say like as always always it's never is nonstop just like sell sell sell that i can't handle it yes it was a bit much it's a lot biggest problem in tourist cities is that once it's become a tour city for a reason probably yeah whatever it's cheap arid or whatever or like some cool shit to see there but once it become a tourist city then the the the market around tourism starts and then they don't leave you alone well I think I think it's just Harris was great they nobody's bugging
Starting point is 00:45:44 you I think it's a balance of realizing there's just so many people in need so many poor people there that they're just trying to find a hustle and they don't understand that the over hustle is gonna hurt the business. It hurts the business but they will sell more. If we're gonna market we just look and like oh yeah look I have this I know you have this that's your table full of I assume everything here is for sale. Oh, those are only for sale, not the rest. Well, every time you go anywhere.
Starting point is 00:46:11 Can't even look. You just got to glance out of the corner of your eye as you walk by. Go across the street and look at shit. Any time you go anywhere, you realize how much better at capitalism America is. Even you go other places in America, New York and LA are better at it. In Brazil, they had a dude who'd sell popcorn
Starting point is 00:46:30 out of his stand out front of the movie theater. No one's letting you do that in America. Get the fuck out of here. We're selling the popcorn. Get the fuck off of our property. I'm just saying, little examples of that. That's a Brazilian example, but that's everywhere. There's just a certain way of the hustle
Starting point is 00:46:50 that American capitalism has really honed in on. But my point is, if they do bother you with this, they will make per capita per hour more sales than if they just allow you to slowly look. Yeah, sure. They're like, all right, I'll take this. So they don't care about you. It's also another tactic. It's like, how do I get these people to leave me alone?
Starting point is 00:47:07 Is a sales technique right right exactly I'm bugging yes I know I'm bugging the shit out of you want me to stop buy something you know exactly so then on the way back We didn't even have his nice train Train so now we're on we're on the three tiers I'm like on my bed on top of me is one of these fucking Hare Krishnas dudes, his feet are all fucked up, they're leaking like a foot juice down off the side of the bed. Dude, yeah, yes.
Starting point is 00:47:36 And it was so gross, it was so nasty, it was so nasty. How did you deal with it? I mean, dude, I'm just like, by the end of the trip we're just like, we gotta get to Thailand. We just wanna get to Thailand. That made you not have to step up. Yeah, dude, and then we're just like, Thailand, we were just like,
Starting point is 00:47:53 just like, just recovering basically from a month. And Thailand's also that, in Bangkok anyway, but not nearly like that, like we were describing. It was just so next level the whole time. I'm trying to think if there's any other things that I'm forgetting that was all. Were there hookers? Were there?
Starting point is 00:48:10 There were no women. And you know what else? When you see a woman also, I don't know, there's a theory of what. It's almost when you do see a woman, it's like, are they eating all their husband's food? Because the dudes are so skinny and the women are so big. Really?
Starting point is 00:48:24 Yeah. Wow. It just feels like they're hoarding up all the food is what I remember. And then you really wouldn't see that many women at all. Like, we really didn't see any. Are they just at home? You don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:48:33 It was like, there were no women there. There were no women at all. Oh, here's another thing. Dudes there, this is a thing you have to get used to. Straight dudes hold hands with their buddies. And this is, Gabe, it's just OK. You hold your friends, you hold hands. This is, we're friends. We hold hands with their buddies. And this is, it's just okay, you're friends, you hold hands. This is, we're friends, we hold hands. And this is where my theory came up,
Starting point is 00:48:51 and I think this is a theory where places where you're not allowed to be gay, you can actually be even gayer. Because it's like, well, I'm definitely not. It doesn't exist. Like you'll hear these stories. When I was in high school, if you held your hand, if you just randomly held your hand like that, limp wrist,
Starting point is 00:49:07 it would be like, you'd see it, you'd be like, oh fuck. And then like, too late you saw it, I'm like, oh yeah, I'm limp wrist, get him, get him, get him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if the assumption is no one's gay, then it's like, what, just my lips are tired. It's not even a thing, but I'm saying it's next level. Like, I've heard the stories from certain troops
Starting point is 00:49:21 in Afghanistan. That's why I heard some comic went to Edinburgh. Edinburgh, okay. Edinburgh, how do you say it? Edinburgh. I say Edinburgh. You've gone there so many times. I know, I say some comic went to Edinburgh. Edinburgh, OK. Edinburgh. How do you say it? Edinburgh. I say Edinburgh. You've gone there so many times.
Starting point is 00:49:28 You should know better than me. You're saying it wrong. I'm like, no, Edinburgh is to say it wrong. That's definitely wrong. Edinburgh. Edinburgh. Edinburgh. Whatever.
Starting point is 00:49:34 I think the second way. Burra. Burra. Anyway, there was some black comments. Do race, they wouldn't let me in. I'm like, no, dude, they don't have races against black here because there's no blacks. You're way off.
Starting point is 00:49:45 They're racist against maybe some Muslim immigrants or some fucking Glaswegians. They're not enough for you to fucking care about you. I don't know if that's true. You'd be surprised how racist people can. Racism. But also blacks suck. It's weird.
Starting point is 00:50:00 Dude, it's in popular culture. Shit leaks out to different places. It sucks. Well, I mean, that's the interesting thing about India because I do think they have classism based on skin color, dude, it's in popular culture. Shit like leaks out to different places, it sucks. Well, I mean, that's the interesting thing about India because I do think they have like, classism based on skin color, some of it. I believe the Untouchables are generally darker. I think so, I'm not sure about this,
Starting point is 00:50:13 so if I'm wrong about this, I apologize. But they are like, you know, you'll find that like, skin tone racism, I think, in different countries, to different degrees, you know? I don't know. I'll tell you who the comic was later, but I asked, I'm like, did you not let this guy in? They're like, yeah, he was screaming coming in,
Starting point is 00:50:28 he was pass out drunk. No, we're not gonna let a guy like that in. And I was like, oh, he's claiming it's because he's black. And they're like, what? Wow. You don't think we've dealt with drunks before? They were like, what are you talking about? Well, that's the distorting thing
Starting point is 00:50:41 and one of the white privileges is to know that it's probably that our Problems probably suck. It's almost bad in us. You know, why don't you ever get it? Yeah, I did nothing and they just started yelling Nobody does less more nothings than white chicks. Oh, yeah, or the comp the classic comedy club We were just laughing just laughing. Just never okay. Okay back to India. Oh I was talking. Oh, so so like so and if so if it's not gay so it's like yeah I'm fucking him in the ass that's not gay wait they have that I'm not saying that this is my theory is that if there's no gay that allows you
Starting point is 00:51:18 to be even gay or like yeah we're holding hands we're not love it love it make it out it's not gay wouldn't be gay who's gay you know what? So it's like, I've heard that about Afghanistan where they're like, something about there is like women for duty, men for pleasure or boys for pleasure or something like that. Have you heard this before? I don't know if this is a rumor that's been propagated by the troops that go over there or if there's like a true, I do believe there's some kind of boy love culture in Afghanistan to some extent. You never heard that before? Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, once I- Boys. Yes. Which is a different- Oh, but once in India, they do have this thing where they have young boys kind of dress up like girls, like with makeup on and like dance around for you,
Starting point is 00:51:58 which we did see at one place. For money? It was just like a performance, like culture performance like little boys dance and listen up like girls and dancing around and make with makeup on it was weird it was definitely a trip did you take a lot of pictures yeah i mean hopefully i can find them for you at home somewhere again yeah it's all film it's like we definitely have pictures did you uh did you uh was it a sec did you get drunk did you booze it there yeah it's something we all well we were all into like we would drink the, um,
Starting point is 00:52:25 Taj Mahal and all their beers there. You know, they have those the lager beers and we drink their, their 20 ounces. Yeah. The big ones. Yeah. They always have big ones in places. The 20 ounce beers is like a standard. We're like, yeah. Well, I think they're more to be shared or more like a bottle of wine, you know? Oh yeah. That's it. Yeah. We're, it's all fucking. Yeah. We're, let's, you want to get a, you want to get some beer? Yeah, let's get a beer. And then all fucking. Yeah, you want to get some beer? Yeah, let's get a beer.
Starting point is 00:52:46 And then you can pour it out. But you're not going to get a 60 ounce beer. You're going to be like, keep getting 20s. Well, the other thing about those places, well, this is another thing, like in Brazil, for example, they do that. And then they have little cups. And so the whole thing is that when it's really hot,
Starting point is 00:52:59 you can't get a 60 ounce, because it's going to get hot. It's going to warm up the beer. You've got to keep it that level, pour out those cups, and then keep it in a cooler. You know what I mean? And that's how you do it. And so you're only drinking, instead of a six ounce, because it's going to warm up the beer. You've got to keep it that level, pour out those cups, and then keep it in a cooler. You know what I mean? And that's how you do it. And so you're only drinking, instead of a pint glass of beer, by the time you get to halfway through it, it's shitty beer.
Starting point is 00:53:13 In Vietnam and Cambodia, they put it over ice. There you go. Yeah, in Thailand, I saw an old lady at a Muay Thai fight drinking a bag of beer, like a straw in a plastic bag. It was awesome. She was so hardcore. She offered me a sip. It was pretty cool.
Starting point is 00:53:31 And you're like, um, yes, no. Do you want to say like, yes, but also my mom would be upset. I'm trying to think of those. Was it dangerous? Did you feel danger there? I mean, we had that scam thing going on. But how about physical? Not really.
Starting point is 00:53:48 A few good men danger. No. What is that, like a missile strike? No, where he goes, uh, with a voice in danger of dying, he goes, is there any other kind? You know what I mean? I mean, generally, I mean, oh, and they have these big, like, buses. Like, people do their trucks up, and it's like, they decorate the. People do their trucks up and it's like, they decorate the shit out of their trucks.
Starting point is 00:54:07 And it's like really beautiful. And it's really cool to see their long haul trucks. So that was cool to see. But definitely the roads there are dangerous. It just felt a little bit chaotic and hectic in general. What did you do day to day? What was your day life there? Well, we were going to another place
Starting point is 00:54:23 and seeing what there was there. Seeing sights? Having some food and seeing the sights. Yeah, man You know you get you get you'll find like um, you get like temple doubt kind of you know You see a few temples you like I already seen a lot of times now Especially in India where they have different religion, you know, there's like this is the Jain temple. This is a Hindu temple This is a Muslim, you know, I mean, it's like there's all sorts of unless you're in the Habit of studying the differences of being temples really, you're just like, show me something old.
Starting point is 00:54:46 And Taj Mahal is a top five temple. That's dope. So after you go to Taj Mahal, the rest must go like, dude. Yeah, well, it's also like, it's like getting churched out in Europe. It's like, I've seen it. And every once in a while, there's one that will really stand out and blow your mind.
Starting point is 00:55:03 And then after that, you know what I mean? It just doesn't really do it for you. So then what else do you see? I mean, man, it's just like, I'm telling you, just be, like a 20 minute walk outside of our place made you just want to go back and just take a minute and soak it up. I mean, Deli's also the first time I experienced that thing where you blow your nose and it comes out black
Starting point is 00:55:23 at the end of the day. Oh, pollution? Yeah, it's that polluted. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you clean your ears and it comes out black. Wow.
Starting point is 00:55:30 It was like pretty intense like that as well. I mean, it was also very hot. Were there any weird foods? I mean- Was it like monkey brain? No, no, that is from Indiana Jones. And it's very fake, like fake it's all it's it's super fake all the things they're doing about about India in that one so and they get it they get a lot of pushback on that it's pretty racist actually when you watch it
Starting point is 00:55:54 but there is still weird shit there but I don't I don't think there's anymore though like we just stopped eating monkey this kid was like yeah we used to have when I was little but I'm like 25 now and now it's like proven to be like it's bad for you yeah but like I don't I like twenty five now and now it's like proven to be like it's bad for you yeah but like i didn't think you had it it's a lot of vegetarian oh one place though because of the hindu yes it was also the so you know some people uh... don't eat pig and some people don't eat
Starting point is 00:56:16 cal you know i mean i've never one place i forget where we were but like they just kinda like strong up a whole cow carcass and it barbecued it. I'm like, I want to try that. It was horrible. It was like the chewiest, most old, like disgusting beef
Starting point is 00:56:32 I'd ever had. It was no good. That was no good. I wish it was just, yeah. Was it cow? I believe it was cow. Yeah, it was just, it was weird to see a full cow, you know, just kind of strung out.
Starting point is 00:56:43 I wish I could remember more about the food stuff. All I really remember is that like, oh, when you're on the train, so the food is that you stop by a stop, and the vendors come up to the window, and that's where you get the food. That's where you get the snacks for the train. Reach out the window and just like. Yeah, they'll give you a meal, man.
Starting point is 00:56:58 They'll show you up in a hand. In a little box. Yeah, you buy whatever snacks you can get, like samosas. They're like, yeah, you got to do it quick, because the train's going. Like, you want a samosa? So it stops like two minutes? Yeah, it stops.
Starting point is 00:57:07 They're letting people off. Can I get a samosa? Did they come on the train or just through the window? Through the window. It's really crazy, yeah. And what is it like in Styrofoam? Dude, I can't remember if it's foil, Styrofoam, or what. But I definitely know there was samosas
Starting point is 00:57:19 through the window on the train. Samosas. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Did people, what did you do with your, did people just chuck the shit out the window? Was it like, literary? I don't remember that, but I definitely know, assume that it wasn't the cleanest, just out of my memory.
Starting point is 00:57:32 But neither is New York. The other day I was looking out of the window by my gym, and I'm like, this looks like a, I mean, it's just covered in garbage everywhere. Garbage, like, rappers. Yeah, it's crazy how filthy this is. Looks like my hotel room on a fucking, you know, on a Saturday afternoon. On the second night. Yeah. Yeah, Asia would crazy how filled it is. Looks like my hotel room on a fucking, you know, on a Saturday afternoon.
Starting point is 00:57:45 On the second night. Yeah. Yeah, Asia would always come in and was like, what are you doing to this place? I'm like, I don't know. She goes, throw it away. It's crazy how quickly you can blow up a room. Yeah, just like, yeah, you can blow it up quick.
Starting point is 00:57:57 Wow, so now you want to go back. I will, I would want to see the parts that I haven't seen. I haven't been to the South, which is also, you know. Goa is the set. The Goa is supposed to be. Well, there's Goa. There's Bangalore, which is supposed to be very, like, advanced.
Starting point is 00:58:08 There's Mumbai, Bombay, all those places. India is massive. Huge. It's a continent. It's a subcontinent. I mean, literally. And so people go, I went to India. That's like, oh, dude, that's, I went to North America,
Starting point is 00:58:19 almost saying. Yes, it is. It's like, I wear Arkansas and Toronto. It is. People say the same thing about, well, at least it's a country. People say the same thing about Africa, which is literally a continent. Oh, Arkansas and Toronto. Well, at least it's a country. People say the same thing about Africa, which is literally a continent.
Starting point is 00:58:27 Oh, I've got to show you this article about Africa, how to write about Africa. What do they say? By this African writer. Uh-huh. I mean, I've got to show it to you. It's just the most demeaning stuff. This is what everyone writes about Africa, and it's so dead on. Really?
Starting point is 00:58:39 Always have a mother figure, a fat mother figure that you're going to call mama or mama. What, really? Refer to it as one country even though it's not even though there's massive differences. You're always trying to help them. Conservation is big. The people are pure unless they're going against the animals and in which case they're not pure. I'm trying to help.
Starting point is 00:58:58 I'm gonna show you the article. I've been to a couple different countries in Africa and I can do a whole Africa episode on that too. But Africa is a trip. But I mean, India is, like I said, I mean there's Kerala, which is like a tropical, sort of a beautiful tropical paradise in the South. No, there's the Himalayas.
Starting point is 00:59:13 I mean there's so many different parts. When somebody's sick of it, so before we wrap up here, and people can work and people find you, Louie Katz comedy. It's Louie Katz comedy on Instagram, TikTok. Louie, L-O-U-I-S. K-A-T-Z. Look up that new special, maybe it's on YouTube,
Starting point is 00:59:27 maybe it's somewhere else. We'll see if I've sold it by then. It's out now. Yeah, it's out now. I'll try to save it, unless it's gonna be out, never. But I'll save it still. It's out this week, right now it's out on YouTube. Look up Louis Katz, he's hilarious.
Starting point is 00:59:39 He's legitimately hilarious comic. His story on This Is Not Happening, which we talked about before I was exited from that. I'll still consider it my booking. Yeah, you did book me. Yeah, yeah. And we worked on it together. Yeah, you did.
Starting point is 00:59:54 You helped me. It was great. It was great. One of your tags is definitely in there. He's funny as shit. So go look him up. But when somebody says, did you go to India? Go, yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:03 What comes to mind, the picture, the smell like immediately of like oh my trip to India was I know there's so much you did a month is crazy it's not a specific thing it's like I keep saying it's the most different most intense place like here's what I say for example is like you know like the remember the Wild Boys travel show with the guys from Jackass yeah and most the time they look for like the craziest thing to do there. But somehow their India episode reminded me of India because it's just that crazy. They found a guy with, they did a Jackass album.
Starting point is 01:00:35 Here's another thing that you find in India is that there's also more people with crazy birth defects because they don't have the best hospitals there. So you still see, or they're malnourished in ways that we don't even have to deal with anymore here. So I remember once in a while, boys, they found a guy with elephantiasis of his foot and he walks around because he can't wear shoes because his foot's so damn big,
Starting point is 01:00:57 and they lick the bottom of his foot. Now I would never lick the bottom of the foot, but I definitely saw the foot. Do you know what I mean? So it's like, it's like. And then you're like, yep, I saw those. Yes, it's just like a very, it's just really cool because I think traveling at its best gives you a reset.
Starting point is 01:01:14 You get used to your environment and you kind of take things for granted. And when you're in a place where you see things differently, like you start noticing everything again, kind of like a baby or a kid, you know what I mean? And once you travel to a lot of places, it doesn't do, you know, you're chasing a high, you can't get any more.
Starting point is 01:01:29 You wanna get that high again, go to India, man. It's the most different, most intense, cool place that I've ever went through. You can't get that high going to Denmark for the first time. Yeah, you know what I mean? After you've been to a few places. Yes, you go to India, it's like, it's gonna be different. And it's very, very cool and very mind-opening to see something
Starting point is 01:01:47 so different you know all this people's a lot of people speak english uh... and uh... and that's a kind of a it makes it easy to get around in some weird ways the weird thing was india so was india and thailand sorry now i'm jumping back i was kind of a wrap-up but now i'm jumping back into it everyone speaks english but thailand
Starting point is 01:02:04 very developed tourism industry. So it's actually easier to get around in Thailand where people don't speak English than it is in India where everyone does speak English but they're not used to having as many tourists. Which is strange. But I'm just saying, I still think in India, it's like, you wanna see something truly different,
Starting point is 01:02:20 go to India. That's what I'm saying. I like the way you said that. The differences show, like it almost says something about your own culture almost. Yeah well you just notice things you just notice day to day stuff man. And you're like oh they do that different here I read an article recently I got to find out who it is cuz I'm gonna keep quoting it it's like when he got off the
Starting point is 01:02:37 plane he noticed that the sign it wasn't English first Spanish second Mandarin third it was let's say china i'm i'm making something to be mandarin first uh... and then and then english second which is like all that's weird and then spanish not at all here anybody goes to fault was different then i have it at it and that in the fonts of signs in american yeah i have to just look all the cabs here are white city yellow yeah it's just like these little things
Starting point is 01:03:03 that amy like i've never noticed the color of cabs before. Dude, I mean speaking of that, the car we rented was one of these ambassadors, which is this old British car that's basically like the car in India, and they have this old, big, beautiful car that you drive around, and these ambassadors, that's what they're called.
Starting point is 01:03:18 You can look them up. That's another thing where you see a lot of more Renaults, and like cars like, what brand is this? I've never heard of it. And they're like, who's making this, some guy? No, they I've never heard of it. And you're like who's making this some guy. No they sold like 80 million last year. Well the worst will be some usually they're like how can you even live in a car that tiny. But sometimes you're like that's a cool car and it's from a brand that they have in America and they just don't
Starting point is 01:03:39 sell it here. And it pisses you off. Yeah. But yeah, there's those little different, every time you travel, you'll notice the little differences. In India, there's even more of them. And it's really cool like that. Do you have an idea about travel you can share? You have a lot. Joe List said, it's good to go with Louis Katz, because he knows little things that I would take for granted.
Starting point is 01:04:02 That you're like, hey, don't take your passport with you. Put that in the safe. And you're like, oh, don't take your passport with you, put that in the safe. And you're like, oh, really? Yeah, oh my god, yeah, you just started traveling. But little things like that where it's like the cultural differences is what you see. It makes you good. The way you said it was good.
Starting point is 01:04:14 But something like that from each person. I mean, yeah, that would be great. How would you travel that you could impart on anybody? What I said before. And the other thing about when you think someone's ripping you off, think about how much money is it really to you like don't where you get that upset Yeah Before you get that upset be like is this are you still getting a deal compared to what you spend in the state?
Starting point is 01:04:32 We used to like then let it go nickel dime quarter Poker my friends and and if you go on a real bad losing streak with that So like fucking shit you get upset and then but later you're like that was twelve dollars So like I don't it's actually not gonna affect me financially, so you can have the feeling of really losing, but then it's not hurting you in the long run. And even the wins, you're like, yeah, but it's not gonna turn your life around,
Starting point is 01:04:53 but you do feel great, exactly. Like, don't get scammed, feel like, what the fuck, but then also like, chill, bro. Yeah, yeah, just be okay with it. But yeah, I mean, I still recommend it, I guess what I would wanna do do is I want to do it like a level up instead of trying to do it so on the cheap. I would like to also in general.
Starting point is 01:05:11 But it sounds like on the cheap though wasn't bad. It sounds like it was bomb. It would be nice to make it just a little bit more comfortable. I think there was one night where we didn't find a place. We just shared a room with three cops that were chilling, sleeping for the night. And it was like. What a cool experience over like,
Starting point is 01:05:27 I know it's not luxurious. It wasn't like we bonded and played Monopoly together. It was weird, man. Okay, fair. It was a weird vibe. Also, the other thing is, what got me from living in Brazil was that, I mean, as a white person,
Starting point is 01:05:40 my privilege was to somewhat trust the cops. And in Brazil Brazil I learned like really cops can get away with it. If you want someone to get away with doing anything to you it's a cop. Like they can do whatever they want. You know what I mean? And especially in countries where they're just kind of where the police can be a little more corrupt even more corrupt than they are here. You know what I mean? That seems like that those are the things that are helpful to understand like the black experience or something. We're like I get it a little more because I have finally now had an experience where cops are not for directions. Yes
Starting point is 01:06:10 I know you're talking about I think yeah, I mean I gotta I gotta give you see this I'm saving this but I got a story from the Brazil one where up with with some corrupt cops So I've had you know experiences with all that. Okay, but yeah, man That would be my thing about about about traveling in general is that waking you up, that change of perspective, and the most hardcore change of perspective you'll ever get, in my experience from traveling, was India. Wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:35 It's something mystical about that place. It's cool, man. It's like there's a lot of- Does it feel spiritual? There's so many different sides. I don't, I'm not a, not for me. You're not that guy. I'm not that dude. Because is a thing of there, right?
Starting point is 01:06:46 Well, yeah, I mean, there's a lot of I think the the Buddha's from there You know what I mean? So there's a lot of and a lot of religions are from there and there's all that kind of thing But like I'm just not I'm not on that But I have like, yeah, I don't know maybe I probably would have been done better like knowing more about it before I went I really think it's not your thing. Well, no nowadays. I probably would want been done better knowing more about it before I went. I really went. It's not your thing. It's not your thing. Well, no. Nowadays, I probably would want to research it more. I was just like, what's that? I wasn't ignorant about it.
Starting point is 01:07:11 I knew I was familiar with Indian food. I have some Indian-American friends. You know what I mean? I wasn't that ignorant. But I also wasn't like, I'm going here to get in touch with some kind of religious thing. But you got to do what you're into. So I went to Dominican Republic. I'm like, I want in touch with some kind of religious thing. But you gotta do what you're into. So I went to Dominican Republic, I'm like, I wanna go to some baseball games.
Starting point is 01:07:28 But if you're not into baseball, then that's not your thing. Or I wanna smoke cigars and drink rum and coffee. Well, I think we tried to watch a cricket game and that is- No, we didn't get to cricket. Dude, there's nothing to get to. That shit is horrible. It fucking sucks. I think actually they recently- Is it over a few days?
Starting point is 01:07:42 Dude, it takes forever. It's so boring. I don't like any sports I don't like any sports, and I said cricket is the most boring sport in the world. It's so dull It was I think I'm pretty sure we went to one now I think they've shortened them to like a single day a single day, but it's crazy how much they love they love Cricket you sit there and picnic all day. Don't you is it like now? I don't know what the fuck you do, man. It sucks.
Starting point is 01:08:06 But my friend, the cool thing about my friend, who's, his mom is British, so he knows about cricket and stuff like that. And like, when we're on the beach with the pigs, some kid had a cricket mallet, and he was like, let me like, I think instead of pitch, they bowl at them. So he kind of knew how to do it, and that was kind of neat, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:08:23 That he could like, he could communicate in the cricket kind of thing. Whereas to me, I don't know anything about it. It was boring as shit. Oh, man. I don't like any sport, but this is the most boring of sports. Horrible. It's the more boring baseball, which is already the most boring sport.
Starting point is 01:08:37 Yes. It's mostly not action. Yes. Baseball, I actually enjoy it. I like baseball and basketball. I like being there enjoy I like baseball and Friends, but if you don't know baseball you're like Anything happen like no not for that couple minutes well for me because I'm not a sports guy
Starting point is 01:08:55 Sports is like I should have an up here. Yeah I should I should get drunk and do something different than just getting drunk around a table What if we got drunk and looked at something that's all it is so baseball is cool because like it's time for a sec time for another Drink you know, let's catch up. And there's something to watch. That's why I like strip clubs too. But then to watch is to talk to your friends like, no, no, leave us alone. We're just watching. Yeah, yeah. Here's a dollar go away. Here's a dollar go away.
Starting point is 01:09:15 That's honestly what it is. Like, I prefer that much more to like, I hate bars full of TVs. I like a bar full of naked ladies. I like people playing some kind of game. Shooting people out of their puss. Yeah. I like people playing some kind of game. You know what I mean? Shouldn't people get out of their puss? Yeah. I mean, that's for the Thailand episode. Yeah, I just got the one.
Starting point is 01:09:29 All right, Louis, thank you. Thank you, man. I appreciate it. India. Now I really want to go to India. Yeah, you should. Does talking about this make you go like, fuck, I want to go back? I've always wanted to go back, but I just like... It's the intensity.
Starting point is 01:09:40 It's the hard corn. It's like, honestly, my girlfriend kind of which were tried plan trip for next month and we're talking about going to morocco and like i'd just kinda had street hassle flashbacks i'm just like man i'm just not trying to get street hassled anymore all part of my plan also was the way i was thinking about it
Starting point is 01:09:58 so it's kind of a hot choice you usually uh... if people go to a place after college sorry kids with the wrap up they go to like europe or they go to like a tropical beach place. And my whole thing was always like, I wanna travel to developing countries because they're cheap and they're difficult. So right now I don't have money,
Starting point is 01:10:17 but I have a lot of stamina. So I'm gonna, instead of going to like Europe first, so it took me like, I've only been to Europe in the last few years. Before that I was mostly traveling in the developing world. Because it's so adventurous. It's more affordable. And it's like I heard there's a waterfall in this town.
Starting point is 01:10:31 Yeah. And you're like what? There's no Google Maps where you can just get right to it. It's only taking you there. And you get some of that. What's the waterfall? Like I don't know. Like to learn the word for water and fall. Like oh, over that hill and then like right. Yeah. Okay. Well you're still down for that stuff. And to me I'm like, I knew, actually it's funny because I'm saying that I think that was for
Starting point is 01:10:48 when I was younger and literally that's how I planned it. I was like, let me do this crazy shit when I'm young. I can always go to Europe. I can be 50 and go to Europe. I'm not gonna want to be 50 and be bumming around India necessarily, you know? But you will be. Yeah, hopefully.
Starting point is 01:11:04 I think you should go. India? Yeah. Yeah, it's never really been on my list. But of course, it's like, well, of course, I'll some point go. It's just never been on my, you know how you have these countries on your list, your mental list of like, I don't know something about that country I've always wanted to go.
Starting point is 01:11:15 Other countries like Russia, I'm like, no interest. But not like I'm against them. I just. It doesn't interest you? It doesn't. Well, you got to bring me back for the Russia episode. But like Iceland, so much. Finland, not so much. And then like Amsterdam, obviously more. I've been to all these places now. Yeah, but these are all the, this is all the ideas and
Starting point is 01:11:34 like some of them are ideas culturally. Oh yeah, some of them are just like, I read some character in her story once when I was young said it was his favorite place and now it's like I want to go there. Yeah, well that's no reason. Belize not so much and fucking you know. Where are we? And like you know I don't know you know some countries just are in your head of like I suppose I want to go. This pushes it higher. Yeah I think it's also like. It's also a place I'll assume I always I would go at some point. I just know I will go to Indy. I just really think someone who's seen so many places, like I said, you get burned out.
Starting point is 01:12:07 Some things are kind of the same everywhere. It's not that interesting. You're chasing that high. You'll still get the high in India. I guarantee it. Great. All right, buddy. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:12:16 Thank you, man. Guys, this has been UB Trippin. Please subscribe. If you're watching on YouTube, just throw a comment in. Reach out to at Louis Katz Comedy. Tell them you had a good time and Yeah, tell your friend about it and fucking I don't know leave in the comments the places you want to go and if you've been to India leave in the comments your fucking stories because
Starting point is 01:12:34 When Carlos sees a good one, she tells me about them and they do make me feel like they entertain me. So alright Thank you guys. Thank you, Louis. That's the episode, everybody. Thank you very much, Louis Katz, for coming in. What a disgusting country that is, huh? Goddamn India. Fucking gross as shit. Sorry. Just took a puff of my fucking OMEX cigar from Foundation Cigars. Enjoying myself. It's July 4th everybody. Maybe you're watching this on this day.
Starting point is 01:13:08 Yeah, it's America's birthday, a place I have not covered yet in this podcast. I may at some point do the national parks or certain places in America, but not yet. Not yet, only international travel for me or possibly a foreigner coming here on their vacations. Nick Cody, we're gonna do a podcast, but then we both got too drunk.
Starting point is 01:13:28 He said, let's not do that, let's just fucking get drunk at a fucking hotel bar, a shitty hotel bar in the worst area of Sydney, like the lamest, the business district. Well, that's the episode. Guys, don't forget, if you're going to Edinburgh, and you should, it's a fun fucking time, check out Louis Katz,
Starting point is 01:13:44 he's gonna be at the county house at 8.30. Tell him I sent ya. Guaranteed, that's gonna be a great fucking show. He's at a fucking amazing comic. Eau Claire, Wisconsin in July, as well as the Bray Improv, July 10th. Brooklyn Comedy Club, July 25th and 26th, where if you're an American and can't get to Edinburgh, and all those places you can see a preview of his Edinburgh show, and it's gonna be fucking amazing. Louis Katz is smart, he's filthy, and he's hilarious. That's all you really want in a comic. Happy July 4th everybody.
Starting point is 01:14:15 Next week, Simeon Goodson will be done with America. He'll be fucking done with this goddamn country. We'll go into the country that's gonna take it over next. Yeah, China, the USSC. Simeon Goodson is gonna tell us about his days as a fuckin' DJ in Wuxi, Wuhan? No, Wuxi, China. Running Black Knights for a clenched shoe
Starting point is 01:14:32 that had probably seven black people in it at the time. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Subscribe wherever you're watching or listening so you can be notified of new episodes. They're all all fucking bangers guys are you're enjoying this I know you are read the comments leave a comment with anybody you suggest and Shroomfest July 20th 21st 22nd get your t-shirt at rechefair.com slash merch as well as the vinyl of my special Jew only a thousand
Starting point is 01:15:00 will be pressed you can sign up for the mailing list to get on a raffle to win one of the signed test pressings of that vinyl. Only five will be in existence. That's it I guess. Thank you very much to YMH for producing this podcast. Thank you very much for Alan Caffey for editing it. We're having a blast. YMH people are fucking good people. Heather does not have elf ears despite the way she wears her hair or the way her elfin ears come out of her hair. That's not a reality. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the episode. Subscribe, watch. Next week's Simian. I think I said everything. I don't know how to say goodbye in fucking India. Hope you enjoyed the episode. Subscribe, watch. Next week, simian. I think I said everything.
Starting point is 01:15:45 I don't know, say goodbye in fucking India. I mean, it's like every week I get to this point and then I fucking don't research it. Whatever. Guys, there's something I'm forgetting, but you know, you gotta live with shit. You really just gotta live with shit. I'm Ari Shaffir and I forget a lot because I smoke other stuff.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.