You Be Trippin' - Laos w/ Danny Polishchuk | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: January 12, 2026

Follow Danny on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/dannyjokes/ SPONSORS: -Grab your own pair of The Dillon Freewaters flip-flops while supplies last at https://freewaters.com Thanks to YMH's very own Katelyn for help with this flipflop ad!!!! Danny Polishchuk joins Ari to talk about a Laos trip that gets chaotic fast — from sketchy two thousand dollar tea scams and dangerous tourist traps to smoking opium in the jungle and waking up seriously sick. Danny breaks down contracting dengue fever, being stuck in bed for a week, and tracking down an Australian doctor when things got real. ລາກ່ອນ You Be Trippin' Ep. 101 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://arishaffir.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:52 - We Are Headed To Laos! 00:04:11 - Terracotta Warriors 00:11:50 - The Chinese Tea Scam 00:26:49 - Smoking Opium In The Jungle 00:35:12 - Waking Up Sick 00:38:48 - Contracting Dengue Fever 00:43:24 - Finding An Australian Doctor 00:55:16 - Finding Stand Up Spots In Asia 00:57:03 - Laos Travel Recommendations 01:05:41 - Outro + Trippy Award Winners Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Yeah, for sure. It'll be like, bu, the first time I was at the comedy store and they taught me the system to bring people in, I had to, like, write it down and like, okay, push that

and then you'd ring it up, and then by the end it was like... Yeah, yeah, you've heard you, it's like muscle then or whatever. Where you've been and where you're going? This is our race travel show. Yeah. We're going to talk about travel today.

It's you. Yeah. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the world's only travel podcast. The podcast is a internet radio. if you don't know what it is. And today I have on my friend and colleague, stand-up comedian extraordinaire, the host,

well, then I'll do that after, Danny Polishek. Hello. And he's going to take us to Laos. Yes. Fuck. Yes. I love Southeast Asia. You check out Danny on Instagram at Danny Jokes.

2.0. For now. Danny Jokes. That's it. On Twitter, if you're still on that fucking worst site in America. If you're looking to be angry at everything, someone's meal. If you like to watch

on Twitter Yeah But we're not talking about his Beltable podcast called the Boyscast The Bath House The Bath House of Colin show And the Low Valley male Low Valley male

We're here to talk about travel And we're going to go to Laos Southeast Asia Here we go What year was this? Wow so this is I went in 2007 Right after I graduated college

me and my girlfriend at the time. We went on a trip of Asia. We went not just four months. That's fucking great. Yeah. That's great. I like that you're into that shit because I'm really into that shit

and I know now I'm like, I don't think my life set out like my current, my fiance, she's not about like going somewhere for her. She's glitzy. She's a jop. She's just a jop. I like her, but that is definitely like.

She's just a jop. It's just what it is. I can see her going. I mean, I'm speaking out of turn for sure, but I can see her going. No, no. I was like, let's go backpacking.

She would never be like, let's go backpacking anywhere. That would never be on the table. Like, nothing that's, you know, rugged. She's like, we can model new Osprey backpacks, but if that's what you mean, which I doubt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, she's cool, don't be wrong. And she's down for, like, to go on trips and stuff. Like, we went to Europe recently, like, but she's more of, like, an, a Malfi Coast.

Europe is such a different trip than Southeast Asia. Oh, way different. Way, way different. So four months. So we were, so we started in Beijing. What period of your life was this? This is 2007. So I just graduated from college.

From college. So kind of perfect time to do it. The best time. Like if you're that age, like, you know, everybody told me at the time you're like, you're not going to be able to really. What are you giving up? You're just starting a little later. You're not ruining a job.

You just get a job after. Exactly. Like, nothing's given up. There's never going to be an easier time in your life to really go do something like this where there's no like real repercussions of anything. Yeah. So me and my girlfriend. I met some Canadian girls in, in Myanmar.

Yeah. Four Canadian. they were 18 and five maybe four of them and um i was like how are you doing this two of them were on a year long trip and they're like oh americans we don't get gap years yeah and they're like we don't get gap years yeah yeah yeah you're making a year off yeah of course of course yeah you just make a gap year yeah which some people will be like oh well you know i don't know how it works if some college is like not going to admit you because you took a year off but this was just you know essentially the summer after my last year or i guess slightly after the summer but but it was

September of 2007 went and so we started I had a friend from college who lived in Beijing Who from college in Canada who lived in Beijing. So we went there. That was the first Beijing first. Yeah, so that was the first thing we did. Yeah, flew into Beijing was there for a week then went to Shian which is like the terracotta warriors. Oh wow. You know what I'm talking about? Have you ever seen them? I have a photo. Yeah, let me see. I was too far away when I was in Beijing where I did meet Des Bishop for the first time. Let's see where she... Oh, here, this is Shian. So this is the famous terracotta warriors.

And that's, they have a restaurant called Shian. Yeah, that's... Oh, Shian Fine Foods is everywhere around here. They have multiple different ones. It's this region. It's this region of, uh, of China. It's like central China, I think. Wow.

And so they're big thing there. And they just unearth those? Yeah. So in the 70s, I believe it's in the 70s. Yeah. A farmer found, uh, a farmer found, like was digging and found dug up one of these statues right and then started digging and found like 20,000 of these statues they're called the terracotta warriors they're all so it's like there's like

airport hanger what that's where they were do they move them there no no that's where they were they built an airport hanger around them because it's like now like this tourist thing and they're trying to dig them up so they it's pretty fucking crazy they all have different faces yeah you can go go in Yeah, so you can't, let me see if I can see the, oh, here we go, here's a good one. So literally the faces, they're all different. Wow. Yeah, you would think they'd be the same. You think they'd be the same just for ease of like.

What are they modeled off people? Yeah, they're these stone warriors. So this like king, I might be butchering the story a little bit, but essentially this like king dude, this guy right here. So he died. Yeah, he's very square. I can see why he became king. He died. And then to protect him in like the afterlife or his body or whatever, they built or they constructed these terracotta warriors.

They're all facing one direction, right? They're all facing the same direction. And to their back is his tomb, which is circled by a mercury river. It's like in this like cave with a mercury river so that nobody would fuck with his body essentially. And they built thousands and thousands of these these terracotta warriors. That's so much different than like, what do you want to do when you're like, chuck me in the fucking woods. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just my empty body.

And there have, I think they have even more, like they probably, this is 2007. They probably found more of them, but they're just like difficult to on earth. But yeah, they all have different faces. And so it's like if you came like, oh shit, there's a bunch of warriors guarding this. Let's turn back. I guess that's what you see from a distance is you just see fucking tens of thousands. I don't know. What you need is one schizo fucking.

Yeah, but the thing is they built it after he died, which is so crazy. And they had tons of like horses and and she went there first and just started. So we went to Beijing first. So actually this photo is this is a funny story. So this was my first day. First or second day. So this story right here was, um, uh, I think the second day. My friend worked a job in Beijing.

So he was during the day. He's like, you know, go fuck around. Like we'll hang out at night. But, you know, like, he's got to work during the day. So the, and we were so jet lagging. We're like, you know what? The first thing you do is you go to the forbidden city, which is, you know, where the, Tiananmen Square.

Uh-huh. Right? Like the famous like where the guy didn't get killed. Yeah. Yeah. My favorite thing about that is I walked through

looking for Tiananmen Square and I was like, where the fuck is it? I was like, where's Tiaman Square? Like, it's that. I'm like, well, there's no notice of what happened. And he's like, what happened? Yeah, they're like nothing happened. Nothing happened, Ari.

But yeah, so we're okay. Yeah, yeah. So anyways, we're walking around. Just, you know, taking in the sites or whatever. And it's so funny, I look back because we're just like such, like, I don't know, maybe just like a young thing. Because I'm fairly, you know, we'll eat like a lot of different foods and stuff. And then for whatever reason, we like the first thing we decided to do is just go eat like KFC.

We're like in China. And then I'm like, you know what I'm going to do. Let's go get some KFC. Because they love. That's such trash. I know. So trashy. It's so trashy.

Was it different? Yeah. They have like bones in? All dark meat. All dark meat. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

But they love KFC in Asia. Asia loves KFC. Like it's like one of the biggest restaurants there at the time. I don't know if that's changed. But so we're walking around the forbidden city and we're like, you know, I'm 22. It's cool the forbidden city. Yeah. They redo stuff too.

And they have like the old and then they have the old forbidden city. But so we're walking around and then this this couple comes up to us like this young like probably our age like college looking couple. Chinese? Chinese. Yeah. And they go, hey, um, where are you guys from? And we're like over from Canada.

We go, we're trying to work on our English. because that's and that was like a big thing this is right before the Olympics they're like we're trying to work on our English can uh can we like just walk around with you and just talk English with you and we're like sure I don't see the harm in that what a fucking 22 year old thing yeah they go we're kind of doing a own thing yeah yeah they go and we were like our first day kind of a second day so anyways we're walking around with them and they're just like they're kind of

pointing some things out they go this is this or whatever and then we kind of got into like the old there's like the I think the old forbidden city and we're walking around and they go, have you, what do you have planned for while you're here? And we're like, you know, we're going to go see the Great Wall of China and just whatever. And they go, are you going to do a traditional tea ceremony? And we're like, no, I'm like, I've never, I've never heard and I go, oh, you should, you should do it. It's like a really authentic Chinese thing to do, right? So then we're walking more and they go, you know what? They're like, there's actually, they do one right over here. They go, they do one right over here. If I hadn't fallen for this

exact kind of thing in Bangkok. Yeah, yeah. So they go, they go, they do, they do on writing and we're like in the question. Actually, Margaret, you think they would? Yeah, maybe they. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Some people come out. So they do, they go. And we're in this like weird underground mall. It was like a mall kind of like not like what we think of a mall, but like a little outdoorsy but like indoory mall thing. So anyways, they're like we do, we do, we do. They do one here like, would you like to see it?

And like, I thought they were like inviting us. Because we were kind of like becoming friendly with them. Right. So they're like, would you like, see? I'm like, oh, sure, right? So we go up this, uh, wood, this wooden set of stairs and we walk into this room. And this is, this is the tea ceremony right here. This is the Chinese, this is the girl who did it.

So she comes out and you can see like, so she's, she has her like tea here. Yeah. And there's these little cups like the shot, they're shot glasses essentially. Yeah. And so the four of us, these two couples were sitting at this table around her. And she, you know, she's saying some shit. And. And they had like these little cups of,

they're like these, they're not candied peanuts, but they're like they have some shell on them. If you ever like they're like some Chinese style peanut with like a shell. Haponus. Okay, is that what it is? Yeah. Okay, so anyways they have these like nuts and like seeds.

They have these like. It's like a peanut wrapped in something. Yeah, but it's not candy. Yeah, it's like some sort. Yeah, something's spicy. Yeah. So sometimes it's spicy. So we're like, I'm like eating these nuts.

And then she serves us a cup of tea. tea and you taste it and you're like hmm you know right and then she goes now on to the i love these you have to act way more than if you were just alone yeah yeah anytime someone's like i have a pizza store you come like what what do you sauce is sauce and i'm not even like a big tea guy yeah right so i'm like oh but i'm you know new and i don't want to be like a you know so i want to fit in or whatever respect their culture so then she does another thing of tea try it same thing and I'm just eating these nuts and then like another one. And then at some point I realize this isn't free. Like at some point this comes on my mind and go, you know what, this isn't

going to be free. And like we had left the house, my friend's house, like I think I had maybe like 200 US dollars on me. Yeah. Right. So in my mind, I'm like, this isn't going to be free. So then I say, they go, do you want any more? And I go, you know what? We're okay. Just like get the, get the, and the guy goes, oh, okay, I'll, I'll grab the check or whatever. The check comes. It's like two grand US for like dude they itemize every single peanut they're like you ate 38 peanuts at a dollar a P or three dollars a peanut grand that's too much of a scam that's like well that's what that's what that's one I was like and in my mind I go oh I'm getting fucking scammed right for $38 you could have got me I could have gone like that's fucking bullshit but fine yeah 70 dollars yeah whatever two grand it's like

this is like an insane scam but so so but the thing is you know the authorities in China I'm like a white guy. I don't. And I'm like, I don't know. This is my first day, second day or something. And but I'm just like, so the bill comes. The guy goes, and he's like, can you cover it? Because I brought you here.

And I'm like, dude, I don't have this kind of money. Like I don't, I don't have this kind of money. I don't know who you think I am. Like, I don't have this kind of money. He's like, do you want to see? He's like, you know what? We can split it. And we're like, we'll split it.

He's like, let me get the whole thing from this guy. Yeah. It costs them $4. $5. Yeah, so, so then it's like, shots of tea. So it's like, let's see if we get all two grand out of this. But if he protests and he's like, oh, I'll pay half. We'll still get a thousand out of them.

Of course, whatever it is. And so then I was like, dude, I'm like, I'm sorry. I don't have this money. And he goes, he goes, you know what, just give me whatever you have. And so I gave him like 200 bucks because I gave him everything I had on me. And, uh, and I'm, and the whole time, I'm like, I'm getting fucking scammed. But I don't know what to do. Like I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I'm, can I just be like, you know what,

fuck yourself and I run out of there. And maybe I would have been fine. But my friend who lived in China, he's like, I told him after he was dying laughing. He's like, you're such a fucking idiot. Everybody, I'm breaking into today's episode to let you know a little bit about the guest. Danny Polishak.

He's one of the best Canadian imports to America since Jim Carrey and Great White North. They've actually contributed nothing to our society except those two things. And now, Danny P. He's a great traveler as well. Like all Canadians, they don't stick to where they are because they've got really nothing of value there,

except a president who is now dating Katie Perry. I know it's not a president, but American, what we do in America is we try to mispronounce or not learn about your culture. That's what makes us special. 10 cents, by the way, to anyone who guess what city I'm in. Follow Danny on Instagram at Danny Jokes or get all those tour dates at Danny Comedy.

I'm sorry, Danny P. Comedy. He's also got a bunch of podcasts, a live stream call-in podcast. called Low Value Mail that is on YouTube at YouTube.com slash at Low Value Mail with Danny Polishuk. Wait, at YouTube.com slash at Low Value Mail. But it's low value mail with Danny Palichuk. I've been on there. It's a calling show.

It's fun. It's ridiculous. They do it live at the stand every Monday. There's also got the Bath House on Tuesdays, and he's got the Boyscast that I've been on a couple of times. Great podcast with Ryan Long. The fourth best import from Canada to America. Jim Carrey, Great White, North, Danny Polishuk, Ryan Long. Oh, Getty Lee.

You can follow on my Patreon at Boyscast Patreon. You can also find Danny in the Road, guys. It's a stand-up comic, and all we ever want you to do is pay for us to see us live. So you can actually see my face. This beard is getting out of control. He's in Fort Worth on March. All tickets are available at, uh, Danny P. Comedy is at Fort Worth, Pittsburgh, Chicago, and Detroit. Fort Worth, March 13th and 14th.

The Panther Room, Pittsburgh, April 9th, the Comedy Bar, Chicago, April 10th, and 11th at the Comedy Bar, and Detroit, April 12th at the Comedy Bar. That's a lot of flying. I guess you could drive from Chicago to Detroit, Pittsburgh to Chicago, though. It's a long drive. You can do it. You could do it. You could do it. You could do it. Again, Danny P. Comedy. Also, guys, Oops, wait. Don't forget to subscribe to this podcast, wherever you're watching and listening.

It's a great podcast called You Be Trippin and tell a few friends about it. We have the trippies coming up at the end of the episode. You see this? I have to do them. I will tell you, this episode already nominated, or you'll see soon, for a Trippy for worst trip, and for best episode. Because this trip was terrible.

I mean, I guess we haven't got to it yet. But damn, what a terrible way to see Laos. But what an interesting way to see Laos as well. Follow us on Instagram at U.B. Chippin'Pod. And that's it. Get yourself a T-shirt. Get yourself for a U.B. Tripping T-shirt. Check it out.

I have one. I've been wearing it all over South America. I've been born in 10 countries now. Maybe 11. possibly 11. I don't know what I was wearing that day. Anyway, um,

that's it. Let's get back to the episode. Danny Polishik in Laos. He's not getting there yet. We're getting there. Oh, right, I got the trippies at the end of the episode. So stay tuned for the end of the episode for the tripi awards from 20, 25, the winners. Okay, wow, look at that.

That's further. You can see more foreground. My background, less foreground. More foreground. Less foreground. I'm starting to figure out how to film. But, you know, sometimes the police are corrupt there. and you never know.

And if they know the guys, then you're fucked. You're fucked. Yeah. Like you might get... We kick back. So we're not going to do it. Exactly. So anyway, so he goes out in the hallway,

takes care of the bill. And he goes, okay. And so we all leave together, right? Because he's like, all right. And so as we're walking out, he's, uh, the fucking nerve of this guy. As we're walking out,

he's like, you guys hungry? You want to go get lunch? He's like, there's a good peeking duck place. I'm like, dude, you got all my money. I have nothing.

I have nothing left. Like my girlfriend was crying because we didn't know. She's like, how are we going to get back to the like hotel? We need to take a taxi or whatever. She's like, I don't know. We managed to figure it out. She had, we one of us had like a debit card on us. So we were able like withdraw money.

But then the funniest part was a few nights later. We were at, um, we were playing poker at like my friend's friend's house in Beijing. And then at, you know, two in the morning, we all decided to go to McDonald's and we're in line to McDonald's. And there's these, these Americans behind us, they were talking. And like when you're in, you know, China and you hear other Americans, you kind of just like start talking to them. And so the guy's like, yeah, I've been here for a few days. And he's from Utah. And then there was kind of a lull.

And the guy's like, he's like, I have a question? He's like, did you, have you done? And I go, the T scam? And he goes, yes. He's like, yes. He's like, you did that? I go, yeah. I go, how much did they get you for?

He's like two grand. Because he was like a rich. He was not rich, but he was like probably in his 30s, 40s kind of dude with his buddies. like they were in for work. The problem is they can't tell the difference between, like foreigners can't tell those things between backpackers and tourists. Yeah. So they think they're all just white guys from America.

I mean, they're just like, look, you're a white guy from America, you're here. You got tons of money. And we did our trip so cheap. We went for four months, including airfare. I spent four grand. Wow. Okay. So that anyway, so that was China.

Yeah. And then you left China. We left China. we went to Bangkok right I don't know nothing really that normal stuff

happened in Bangkok Kotow sure went to Kotow Kovoyang all the islands or whatever I will say one thing this is super disturbing was have you been

you've been there area so you know not Kotow but but so you know the Suratani which is where you take the boats you have to like drive from Bangkok you go to this place called Suratani I think that's what it's called

and then that's where all well there's they have all the stuff there but then that's where all the boats leave to go to the islands. Like that's the main thing. And then walk around there and the amount of just like you would see like some fucking 70 year old German dude with like two 13 year old girls. Because this was right when they were starting to be like this is illegal in America to do this shit in time. Because now. Is it really?

Oh yeah. Like if you go sex tourism shit in Thailand, that's illegal in America now. Like they will convict you in this country for shit you do in other countries. But it was and there was a guy. Against it and not against it Because I'm like I've been like we used to go to Amsterdam To get high or Jamaica

Right right well this is specifically This is more morally a point So we're gonna like Yeah yeah this is way worse than that And this is at the same time There was a guy actually I think from my hometown Because there was a big thing in Bangkok

Where he was posting these videos And like photos of him online Like sexually abusing kids And he swirled his face Like he basically swirled his face And then they somehow like Not somehow they unswilled it and then they found him and they found him and they like basically uh yeah that's my least favorite

thing about Bangkok is to see what's gonna become of them but but you see like bunch of seven eight year old at like two a m selling Viagra yeah and and it's like they might not be the ones taking them I just be working but like this isn't this isn't this isn't right why are they not going up bed for school like school yeah school yeah it's just like disturbed I hate Bangkok I hate it 20 hours. Yeah, Bangkok was dirty. Pat pong is gross.

It's like you do it but then afterwards you're not feeling good. So I didn't, my girlfriend wanted to do the, for people you don't know, like the ping pong where they shoot ping pong balls out of their pussy. Bad memories, yeah.

And I just, there was something about it. I go, I don't want to do that. Darts, you hold up a balloon. They shoot a dart out and pop the balloon. I'm like, what if you missed? Your fucking pussy darts going to go into my skin. That's going to be a crazy infection.

Like that wound? What a crazy. Crazy infection. A fucking tie hooker fucking dart. Oh my God. Yeah, that was literally one where I go, I don't.

Good for you. I don't want to do it. We all marched after our show marched over there. They're like, let's go. Let's take these Americans. I'm like, okay. Yeah.

It's like it's something you got to do. Yeah. But it was like, I did have to do it. Yeah, they kept telling us there was something you got to do too, like on Cosaun Road or whatever. And they're like,

you got to do all this stuff. Someone lit off a fucking thing at tear gas when I was on Coastine Road. some point which is what it's it's a fun time like if you're in a 20s man it's a fun time especially if you're in 20s then it's okay as you get older you start to let stuff in yeah yeah yeah and like you know just stay away from that was a big thing with drugs there because everybody's like yo just you know like if you're buying drugs you're probably buying it from a cop or someone with a cop and they're gonna for sure

catch you and i met some locals a local expat and his girlfriend who was tied and i was like they arrest you like nah i just go around the corner yeah yeah they're like i'm like i heard if they just see you smoke like like those are stories are overdone yeah yeah yeah because you just know who to buy it from here yeah yeah you should have to know but like at one of the full moon parties because they have these at uh i just did a podcast about that oh really yeah and there was i remember someone was telling us like there was because there'd be all this horror stories and i was buying all the books like you know they sell the the photocopied books do you remember that what to do no no no they were so just like

some of the kids to make money they literally just sell photocopied versions of books like to make money. Yeah. Like, and you buy them for like a couple of bucks, but that's like their racket. And then I would buy all the ones of like the guys who got like their memoirs of getting arrested smuggling drugs.

It's half of travel writing is. Yeah. It's either what a great experience or so here. Let me tell you what a La Ocean prison is. Yeah. I brought heroin from Australia and spent like, watched like a cockroach hatch out of a guy's neck in a fucking Thai prison or some shit.

But anyways, yeah. The, uh, yeah, Thailand, Thailand was cool. I went to Chang Mai. Chang Mai is one of my favorite. Probably my favorite city there. Awesome. Changi is super awesome. Better than anywhere.

And what I was going to do is in Chiang Mai, I went to a, I went to the cave lodge. It's pretty far away. It's near Sepong. And then I heard about, I was gonna go to Laos and do what we're about to get to it. We should get to it. But instead I was like, there was like,

you should go to a Viphasana meditation retreat. Instead, I was like, what am I gonna look back on with fonder memories? And I was like the meditation ship, but. Was it cool? It was, but I do miss this thing. Yeah. Yeah.

So because you could go up to Cheng Rai and then over, right? Right, yeah, yeah. So this is northern right here. This is we did like a trek. So this is northern Thailand. We basically did like a jungle trek. Can you go up? Who are those two girls?

Randoms. These are, yeah. Let me see. They look so happy. Yeah. Not them, not them. Not these ones. The two whites.

Oh, the two whites. Yeah, right there in the middle. Oh, these two girls. Yeah. I don't know who they were. There were just two girls on our trip. Actually, this girl in the last was a British girl or Australian. and no she was an Australian girl

and her boyfriend was Australian and all they did was fight. Can I just, but they look so fucking happy and free. Yeah. I'm reading into it if all I did is fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, no, the girl on the left fight, but it was like, you know, whatever. So this was, you know, you book one of those like two-day jungle expeditions from Chiang Mai and then they like pick you up

and you go into the jungle and you do like a jungle. No, Chi-Mai. Okay. So from Chang-Mai, northern Thailand. Dude, I love this map, by the way. It's sick. Very sick. Uh, yeah. Yeah.

So it would be like probably just train. Right there. Oh, wait, damn, it's further left than I thought it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I remember when we were there wanting to go to Myanmar, but they just had a military hunter at the time or whatever and people, but someone we met in...

That's not a junta? I don't know. I don't know. Because I recently said something, some Spanish word, and I pronounced the J and everybody was all over my ass, so I don't know. What a fucking loser. Look at this, Jake, you know what I mean? Yeah. So, okay, so...

So, so... So we go to Chiang Mai. We do this like jungle. So this is what this is right here. This jungle track. It's like a group of people. I smoked opium, which was pretty sick. But the guy wouldn't give me the good opium.

Like so because people are like, you know, addicted to opium and their stuff. Right. He so there's a, some local pigs or some, this is an orphanage. Those are the local pigs. Yeah. This was an orphanage actually that we went to. And then this was like, you just do this jungle trek. You sleep there for, I think, two nights.

Wow. Yeah, they had one of these in Myanmar. Yeah, that's, that's me as a young lap. These fucking nothing paths. That's you? Go back. That's me right here. Zoom.

Hold on. Let me see Fat Danny. Oh, so fat. Fucking full of putteen. And then you do this jungle thing and then, but yeah, and that night, there's, I think we played us. That's the minute right there. We played a soccer game with some local children. Yeah.

Some local Thai children or whatever. And then they, do like part of the thing is they just this is the entertainment for the night because you're just like sleeping on the floor of like a hut kind of thing so and they bring the kids out and they do like some dance and old stuff oh my god it was pretty fun time and then this like our tour guy dude was literally like smoke he's like you can get you some opium but he wouldn't give us the good opium he gave us the tourist opium we got to get to louse yeah okay so anyway so we go from here this oh here's a um these trip what should I do for these trips when somebody's like tell him about

the trip and it's like Laos, but I'm like, well, I went to six places. Well, I will say not a lot of super like I'm just getting just because it's the order or whatever. So anyways, so you take the slowboat to Laos. It's from from to Bezai. No, you go to Long Pravonne. Long Pravonne. Yeah. So you go to this Colum. What's that?

Column. And that's the river right there. Yes, exactly. So it's like two days. Is that the May Kong? I don't know. It might be the May Kong. I don't know. Yeah. The Bert Flip Flops by Free Waters. Back that ass up. But anyway, so you take that, it's the slow boat.

It's two days. Drinking. You're getting fucked up. You don't sleep on the boat, though. The first friend I made in Myanmar. First friend I made on the trip. It was in Yangon. And he told me about this boat.

He said, I've already been gone for four or five months. He said, he goes, it's the funnest thing to do. He goes, my advice is get a bottle of rice wine or something. So you can trade booze with people. Yeah, yeah. And you just sit on this thing. It's like, look, it's like wooden benches. It's not super comfortable benches.

But it's just like it's fine. It's a slow boat. It's slow. It's you're just like meandering down. It's amazing. Like the scenery is incredible. If Mark Norman, he would say, yeah, and Mering. I love how you have him in your brain.

I can't do a pun without thinking of Mark. Yeah. Wow. Look at those boats. Yeah. And so then you would stop. I think it was two nights. So, or maybe it's one night actually.

One night in a hotel. We stayed in like the, and so I remember this actually. So the boat you dock and for the first night, the only night. And then there's this mad scramble to find it. We don't go. Sideways. I just want to see. Oh, yeah.

Oh, here we go. That I was like, this can't be the right setting. Yeah, okay. That's great. So there's like mad scramble to get accommodations. What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean?

Because they didn't, like essentially there's all these places like the, the town that it stops in, everybody knows that they're going to have to be putting people up. Yeah. But there's various different places. Some of them are like awesome that you can stay in and some of them were like shitholes. And we got like the absolute like just like this disgusting little dirty place where it was it was gross. Like there were like mice and stuff. But it was for a night and thankfully like my girlfriend at the time she was pretty cool about this stuff.

Yeah. She's just like whatever is what it is. She knew what she was getting into. So then we stay there. Little did I know on this fucking boat that I'm taking this the slow boat. Macong River. That's what it is. Is it the Macong?

Yeah. Okay. So little did I know that I'm a ski. because I was never big on, I didn't take, I got all these vaccines before I left, like Japanese encephalitis because you don't want your brain to show. Yellow fever, Japanese encephalitis, dengue, and malaria. Either there was no dengue fever vaccine. I don't believe there's a dengue fever vaccine.

Rabies. Rabies. But the rabies barely helps you. Yeah. All the rabies shots shows, you got to get three of them a hundred times. It goes, hey, if you get bitten by a wild dog or a monkey or Gibbon that happened to someone I knew, They're like instead of a day and a half to get 50 shots, you have three days to get rabies. Have you ever seen someone that has rabies?

Like have you seen a video someone with rabies? It's insane. It's the scary. It's the closest thing to turning somebody into an actual zombie. Yeah. Like you're dead. It's a death sentence if it hits a certain point because one, it's the true. Like you can't drink.

You have like aquaphobia. So even the thought of drinking like you can't physically drink. And then you just like it takes over your mind. It's insane. Who's that lady in the middle? She's selling food? She is, yeah, she just is like, you know. Going up and down, who wants to eat?

Kind of. I think so. What I love in this whole region is the buses, and I guess the boats, definitely the ferry and like Indo. They just get on and it's either the ferry, it's like we're not leaving for about an hour, so I'm going to get on and sell fucking rice, a bunch of shit in my head, rice chicken, whatever. And then the buses, it's like, I'll go through the next stop.

I'll take the next bus stop back. and I just do that all day selling food. For sure, for sure. I remember, I don't know where it was, but. Blading the bottom left, having a fucking blast. Oh, yeah. Everybody was having the greatest time. I remember one of the buses one time.

I don't know where it was. I want to say it was. It's just chairs. They're not just chairs. Yeah, they're just chairs. Oh, yeah, yeah. They're just chairs. Wicker chairs.

So anyways, I got stung by a mosquito. This is, yeah, this is just on the way there. Wow. So I used to, oh, that's what I was saying. So I didn't, I took, I got malaria pills, but then they give you nightmares. They give you nightmares. So then I stopped. So I stopped taking them after like two days.

And I was very... And you were entering the region where you should be entering. Yeah. And even still now I'm bad. Like I'm not a big sunscreen guy. Like I don't remember to. I'm not a big like mosquito repellent or whatever. So anyways, I got a bit stung by mosquito.

Little than I know I was about to come down with a case of dengue fever. No. Yes. So, yeah. And so this is, so I get to Luong-Prabong. And so Luong Prabong, the thing, the thing, that it's famous for is they have that lazy river. Yeah.

Right? So they have this like 10 kilometer long lazy river. They have a really nice waterfall. So this is the first thing. The first day we got there, we went and did this waterfall, which was like incredible. And we go and do this water.

Wow. Yeah. That's, I mean, it's so interesting. Like, this is a cool picture. Yeah. It's just their poverty. Yeah, it's just their poverty. And it's their just normal life.

And they might actually not be poor. Right. They have multiple cows. Yeah. They have a house. Like, they actually relatively might be. Right.

They have a satellite dish. Those are always cool seeing a satellite dish on what looks like fucking. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. The equivalent of third world. Totally. So,

but yeah. So anyway, so, you're like, whoa, imagine coming here and be like, you work at Walmart. Wow.

Yeah. But so I think this is, no, so this is VNTN. So there were not a lot. So we have a gap of lost photos essentially. Because what happened is we went to there to do the, the tube.

We got there, you know, like on. and we were going to do it the second day. And so we did the waterfall the first day. Because, you know, these are like kind of, you have a lot packed into the schedule. So, and so it's this lazy river where you go down the river,

for people you rent tubes and everybody, they sell magic mushroom shakes everywhere, like in the town beforehand. It's like magic mushroom shakes. And then the rivers on the banks are lined with people who have little bars. So then they, like, throw ropes and you grab the rope. Pull into a bar. Pull into a bar.

I'm not inner tube. You're in an inner tube, but like these big ones. And then they... Slow, slow? Like, how fast are you going? Pretty slow. It's not like super, not like super fast water, but it's, it's slow. And then you just get wasted.

Like, you're on magic mushrooms getting wasted. It takes like, you know, several hours. That's how slow it is. Several hours. You're just tubing around. And when they pull you into the bar, they just give you a drink and you go with it or you go in? I think you can go. I think maybe you, I don't know, because I never did it.

But I think you could probably, like, give plastic. plastic cups and everybody will bring like a Ziploc bag with money in it so that's how they like you know yeah pay or whatever and uh and but like people drown every year like yeah i've always heard about like people it's like well they're getting drunk there's no safety no safety like zero safety precautions it's just like not that kind of thing but anyway so we wake up the next morning to go do this and i wake up i'm like i don't feel right like something is i i had i don't remember if it was it was at first i had the chills or i either started i think what it was because it was you know,

did you, what? 35 Celsius there. Did you, yeah, which is like about 100. 100 degrees, yeah.

Did you think at that point, um, food poisoning? I don't know what I was thinking. I just remember I woke up. I actually know this. I'm not feeling that well. And so my girlfriend went,

she's like, I'm just going to go walk around, like explore whatever. And I'm like, I just need a nap. And I was had like a hoodie on. It was 35 degrees. I had a hoodie on.

I was under the covers and I was shivering like, crazy. I was like, I couldn't, I couldn't stop shivering. I'm like, this is probably not good.

Right? And then I couldn't stop. She comes back. She's like, okay. And then I think I was like, sweating. Like I was hot.

Like it was going back and forth. And so we're like, okay, we should go, they had like a little hospital in Long, in Long, in Long,

Vermont. It's a fucking open air hospital. Okay? Like, this is not like, very small town, right? So, I mean,

when there's sand on the floor in a hospital, you know you're like, dude, they put me on the gurney and I was looking up at the sky. Wow. Like it was nice, but also.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're like, I'm like, I want modern. Yeah. And the thing is, if you go to, like, Bangkok has some of the most modern hospitals in the world. And so. Yeah, for it third world as Bangkok is when you land there, you're like, this is very first world. It is really funny the distinction because people will be like, that's third world. And then you see like their roads and stuff versus what's apparently the first world.

And you're like, it's just like brand new. Yeah. Yeah. But so go to the hospital because I'm like, not feeling good. Go to the hospital in Luong, wrong. wait then nobody speaks English at all they finally they're like okay come on in I they lay me down on this gurney and then the doctor comes in with 10 like med students right because they guess I'm going to be their fucking case for that's how I was I broke my leg in Canada they're like let's put

him in a hard cast I was like hard cast I mean this was five years ago really yeah and he was just teaching his fucking student how to do a hard gas he goes fucking fuck the American we're not going to give him a soft guy can get around he goes don't get this wet I'm like I'm going back to New York in February. Yeah, yeah. I'm definitely going to get it wet. Really? There's no way I'm not going to get it wet.

I step in puddle. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you got to put a bag on it. Yeah, and he's like, well, and then I got back and the doctor's hair was like, man, he was experimenting on you. Let's get this off and let's get you a regular set up. Let's get rid of that shoddy Canadian healthcare. But anyway, so I go to the hospital when she comes in the doctor, it's like this older lady with all these med students.

First thing she does is she takes off. I had like a Birkenstock sandal. She takes it off and they're passing it around. because they've never seen a shoe this large. Oh yeah. You know, so they're all like examining my, like I felt like a fucking alien. What's your shoe says?

12. Dude, I had to find new flip-flops in Phnom Penh. Impossible. Yeah, they're like, no. And I was 11 and a half. They're like, 10 is good. I mean, we'll do the fucking European conversion, but like pretty much they were like the equivalent of size 10 is good.

I'm like, no, like it'll stretch. I'm like, not the soul won't stretch. It's a piece of plastic. And also not a size and a half. Maybe a half size or a quarter size. I was in Asia, like any clothes I bought where I'll triple XL. Oh, yeah. That's what XL is like, oh, I'll take a large.

I'm like, no, I don't know. Like, large there is. So anyways, I'm in the hospital. She's like passing it around. Wow. And then she goes and she puts like a blood pressure cuff on me, right? But she can't speak English. So she's not telling me what's going on.

She's just doing her thing. She puts like a blood pressure cuff on me and she pumps it up as as much as it can go, like, till I can't go anymore. So it's like my arm's going totally numb and shit. Right. And then she just keeps it like that. And I'm standing and I'm like, what's going on? And they can't tell me. And she's just holding it.

I'm like, what the fuck is going on? And at that point, I go to like rip it off because it's like my arm is going totally numb and it's like feels all fucked up. And she like swats my hand away. And then finally after like maybe a minute or two, she lets it go.

And then she takes it off. She looks at my arm. And then she goes, you have dange fever. In what? English? In English? that's the one thing she knew.

She goes, you have dengue fever. So. Well, she knew the possessive. Or she maybe said, whatever. But so I learned after the fact. So normally, you've already heard of that. I don't think I had.

I don't think so. But so I googled it. And essentially, so like in first world, if you have dengue fever, if they think you have dengue fever, they draw your blood. And they go and they do a blood test. In the third world,

they do this. And then they look at the blood vessels burst per square inch of sense. skin and if you have dengue fever a bunch of your blood vessels were burst when they do that on your arm. It's like really old school way of testing. So she wasn't using the thing

to take any blood pressure. No she wasn't taking my blood pressure she was trying to burst the blood vessel. So right away she knew like let's just get the super tight I think he might have that. She probably knew what I had yeah she her she had a good idea and dengue fever is fucking everywhere there. It's bad and if I apparently now if I ever get it again I have like a 5 to 10% chance of dying.

It goes up right with the damage it does. The first after you have it once like you are susceptible. The next time you have it, you can die. And it's not a super small chance. Are there pills to take to stat? I don't. Or is it just, it's just deep? So when I was in Cambodia,

I remember there was this dude. He was like a French or like European composer who like lived in Cambodia and his whole thing was raising money for dengue fever. And their only thing that they could do is just nets. It's just mosquito nets that

you can slow it down. Yeah, yeah. Slow down and they're like it kills you know 50,000 children a year something insane and all they need is like these nets that cost $2. And that'll give them eight hours of sleep nine hours of sleep without being Well it'll just save their life they'll just like

Because that's what they come to overnight Yeah and it just keeps the mosquitoes Away from them or whatever even though I don't think I got it overnight but I could have but so then anyways She's like Dusk and dawn of the trouble moments Yeah yeah and so then so basically she's like you have dengue fever And they call it like bone breakers

disease if you ever heard that because it feels like your fucking bones are smashed like it's so fucked up like you feel the sorest you've ever been yeah it's yeah it's yeah it's like wild how sore your body is like to the core so then i remember asking i was like can i uh do i have to stay here because we were in this like shitty little guest house in um in luangperang and it was just like you know it's all dirt roads and everything and at that point i was like i'd like to maybe be a little Get a hotel now. Yeah, it's time to spend like $500. Because you've got to go on that trip.

How much you go with? We spent $4,000 for the whole thing. Our accommodations were $10 a night split. Right. Yeah, some of these hostels are like if you have a couple, you're like, oh, it's cheaper to get your own room for two people than to get two beds in a dorm. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We would pay $10, $12 a night, $15 if you wanted air conditioning. And so it's like everyone has a certain amount of time of money. Yeah. So if they had $10,000, That's a year. 12 grand is a year. Exactly. And so like two grand is like two, three months.

And then you already have your ticket back. And so then it's like, hey, if we got to get something nice, we just lost two weeks. Exactly. Yeah, yeah. So no, this was, I think. But you have to. This was I have to. Actually, you know what?

I actually think, because I told my mom that I had dengue fever and when I was like, you know, just go get a hotel. And so I asked them someone there. I was like, can I go to Vantien, which is the capital. Yeah. Down there. Real French area. Yeah.

Exactly. Ventian. It's the capital of Laos. And I'm like, can I go there just to rest up? Do I have to stay here? And they're like, no, go ahead. They gave me paracetamol, which is like Tylenol, something like that. Something like, it's their version.

That's the only thing they gave me. And they go, you just need to get rest. But another- It just passes? So here's a thing. So in most cases, in healthy adults, yes. But that was another reason I went to VNTN is there was an Australian, like, health clinic there.

Yeah. That was run by like an Australian doctor. who would come for like six months a year, live in Vientien and would treat people or whatever. So I'm like, I need to go see that guy. Because I'm like, I want like,

you know, first world kind of health care or someone I can actually speak to. So anyways, going to Vientien, I'm like in a whole, just a bed for a week. And I would go see this guy.

And this guy took my blood. And he's basically like, look, this is what's probably going to happen with your, I don't know exactly with your blood cells. He goes, if your blood, I don't know exactly what it was, but he's like,

if this doesn't change, which he's like, it probably will, but if it doesn't, we're going to have to airlift you to Bangkok to do like a blood transfusion or something, which is in the worst case scenario. But it ended up just being fine. It just passes. I'm just in a, dude, I was in a fucking bed for a week. And you're like pissing nonstop.

I wasn't eating. Yeah, I was going to say, can you eat? No, couldn't eat. It was just like pissing, not. Like, I would just drink water and just like, I remember I was like how much I was peeing. It was so crazy. And then finally just I started feeling a little better. and then we just left

and we went to I don't know where it is but it's somewhere it's hard yeah I don't remember what it was called but it was like this this little island

like my girl my girl really wanted girlfriend at the time really wanted to go there and this place so this is this is me and this hammock it's like you have to take

like two like little shitty boats to get there and this is right after I had dengue fever and I was still like you know what's that sign is that just like prices for stuff probably and we stayed like

this this was there's electricity they only had electricity for like three hours a day in this place and then we stayed there for a couple days a few days and then from there we went to do the thumb you look like you have leprosy oh i was not feeling oh i probably caught my thumb or some shit what the fuck is that i think it's a note i remember i got um in one of the islands one of those three islands in bank south of bangkok one of them i think it was ko tau their beaches are like full of broken shells, like when you go in the water.

And I remember we went in the water and I was just fucking gushing blood when I came out like, because you get caught up so badly. But then anyways, from there, we went to Cambodia. We went to CM Reap, which is Anchorot. Yeah. And then at that point, I was fine. And then we went from there.

So it just passed. It just passed. Yeah, it just goes away. How long did you stay in this place? Like, this is in Laos. This is in Laos. This is this little like island, like. How'd you hear about this?

She had a friend who had gone there before. To me, that's my favorite way to like, to like get places where it's like, oh, you got to check out this place. I went. It's not in many books, but you should go. Yeah. This is the, this is, uh, this is a rickety ass page. It was like super, like you have to take these like boats.

I remember we got on a boat to go there and this like really done up woman got on. She was like a local. Yeah. And she got on this boat with us because she was using it just to like get around. And she was holding two live chickens. by their like ankles because she just like picked up chickens for food yeah yeah or whatever like this just like I'm like you know cage like I'm just like this dinner just holding two chickens in this bow and yeah this is what it was I can't remember what it was called god and yeah this is this is

the area there was like some local caterer rented a that's you yeah that was me god damn you're a disgusting fat pig what a fucking asshole what do you get that is that what is that red bull red bull yeah of course red bull tie the red bull tie sure you're fucking uh full moon party like a dollar no we never did the full who somehow missed because the full moon party never lined up yeah you know so it's like we didn't and then yeah this is very cool this is fucking gorgeous yeah sick i can't remember what it was what what is it about also not just like okay cool it's a nice place but to get there the amount of passage and effort it takes to get there it's just like more rewarding absolutely like and you know it's way less touched by people and honestly

at this point in my life i don't know that if i would do it like if I was in the area and you go do you want to go do this like it takes a 10 hour bus ride to get there than a five hour boat all this shit you're like and like you're like you're on like a dingy and you're like i don't i really don't know um yeah this was this was that shitty roads and then this the i think this is that this was the lady with the chicken on it actually um but anyways yeah so that was that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh that was uh you was uh fucking bond me sandwiches and shit. And was that as cheap as anywhere there? Yeah, it was so cheap. I mean, you're literally eating meals that are like a dollar. No, you got to save bank. You got to save, uh, uh, 50 cents.

Oh, this is an orphanage. That's my fat ass and, uh, some orphanage. And they're starting to look like yourself. Yeah, more like, you got to save Cambodia for another time. Yeah, we'll save Cambodia for another time. But this was, uh, me and Anchor Wat. Anchorot. Yeah.

That is a cool one. Yeah, Anchorot's fucking insane. This is definitely before a certain hour because after certain hour, because after certain hour, the child. Chinese tourists get there and they just bump you out of the way. You have like under one second to take a picture? The funny is you ever had, have you ever had Asian people want to take a photo with you just because you're a tall white guy? Yeah.

It's crazy. Don't you feel so cool? Yeah. I remember it happened a few times and the first time someone was like photo and I go, yeah, give me your camera. Like I thought they wanted me to take a photo of them like because that's what normally happens. Yeah. And then and they're like, no, no, no, we want to be in a photo. Those Canadian girls in a temple in Myanmar in some city?

people like tape pictures, then a line formed. And then we saw one person get out, switch hats with somebody, and come back in for another photo. Like greedy. Yeah, like, oh, got another. It's like, they're just like,

we don't want to be around these whites. Yeah, these whites. Yeah, they love them. You feel like Tom Cruise. Kind of. So tell more about Laos before we get to, because we can't get Cambodia, there'll be another episode.

Basically, that was kind of it, to be honest. Laos was the bust for the trip. Because, so, and my girl was kind of, I felt bad for her because, because Vientien is, you could do it in the day. It's not a place. There's not much going on there. It's the capital of Laos.

It's, you know, whatever. There's some restaurants and some bars, but that's everywhere. But there's not like a lot of cool stuff to see there. Not a lot to do, really. And I'm in bed for a week and she doesn't know anybody. Yeah. And like most travelers in Southeast Asia, like that's probably one of the places they don't go is Vientian. They go to Long Pervang and then.

To Ventien and then take... Yeah, and then they go to Cambodia, and you'll go to, like, to CM Reap, and then you'll go to Phnom Penh. Pan, I really liked. Phnom Pen was... I saw some text tours in there. Stay Lous.

Stay Lous. Yeah, yeah, all the... Okay, yeah, stay Lous. Yeah. But, yeah, I didn't... Honestly, like, I barely saw Vientian, because I was in a bed. How much were hostels there?

Same? About the same? Cheaper. Cheaper. Louse is, because, like... You're not at the cheapest ones that I saw. Yeah, Laos was... I think Lous was the cheapest,

because that's like the place where you know Henry Kissinger just dropped like fucking 10 million bombs on okay hold on that's a good one to get it too we still have like 10 minutes up but like the when you go there and you realize like the Vietnam War like the Vietnam War was in like five different countries yeah of course Cambodia got fucked Laos got fuck because like well they're bringing arms in from there

I'm like yeah but they didn't do yeah and also Laos like I don't know if this is true but I believe it is and I've heard is that some of the US bombers sometimes would have payloads left of bombs and they like for their fuel like their fuel would run out if they kept the bombs so then they would drop them on Laos. Wow. Yeah.

Just just to get rid of them. They were just bomb Laos. It's like so fucked. You have to see it as not a real people. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. These are like co-crumbs.

Yeah. It doesn't really matter. But I will say the one thing I did not know about, which is unfortunately leaving the Laos topic a little bit, was the whole. Pol Pot shit. I didn't really know much about Pol Pot. He's one of my favorite people. One of the craziest stories.

Danny, Danny. I know. I know. We got to save it. Oh, we'll do another one in Cambodia. Okay, we'll do another one in Cambodia. Because Pol Pot rules. Pol Pot's insane. And never got killed. Never got killed. He lived for like 40 more years in Cambodia. Dude, when I was in

so when I was on this trip and I'm learning about this whole thing and they go, these are like some of the most violent murderers. The killing fields. The killing fields. And they're still alive living in Cambodia. Like, Leng This dude like Langseri or whatever He was like one of the top Uh fucking guys in the Cambodian government for under Pol Pot and they're like yeah

He's on trial right now even though it's he's like 90 They did a real like war's over forgive forgiven forgiven And you're like kind of and then they just like slaughtered babies They killed three million people or whatever and and yeah and and I don't he must be dead now Pol Pot not no no Langsair this guy this guy yeah he was like he was like his top guy This is you know this is a Himmler shit and he's just like alive in Cambodia this is you know mid to 2007 or whatever and he's just like yeah we're getting him on trial at some point uh but he's just like it's also like we don't have the means

i guess to get him on trial well they do they have to go to like the hague like they have to like yeah like and whatever and they're just like he's still a lot and these are all like you know western it's funny because they're all these people were all like educated and they all went you know university in like London and they're all these like rich people they come back It's they, you're right, they found out this new information and then they applied it to their crazy fucked up place. Yeah. And it's like, well, you know, the upper class of bourgeoisie is like,

yeah, the fuck of the bourgeoisie. Yeah. They went and killed everybody with glasses. Everybody with glasses. Like, you're a problem. And then when you think about like, well, generally the glasses people are the issue. Yeah, yeah. I mean, like, yes, it just means bad eyesight.

It's really not about, they didn't do anything. And you want to keep some people with glasses. Well, in China, Mao was like, farmers, you're doctors now. Doctors, you're farmers. And then so that means there was no good farming because doctors aren't on a farm. And then they're like, hey, I don't know how to fix you. I'm just some farmer. Yeah, you're like, I have no education.

You can't just swap them. No, no, no, no. They run some wild experience. Yeah, it's funny, they all kind of talk to each other, Mao, Pol Pot. Of course. And then the South American ones and Cuba and all that stuff. But the one that was like, they say was the worst. Was?

What from Myanmar? Or? What? No, it wasn't Myanmar. Central America? God, it was like he was illiterate. It wasn't Pol Pot, illiterate and just, I should have had more information on this. I had it in my head.

And he was like the moron of the group. Oh. And he was like, we'll do this. Oh. Romania. Oh, Chowcchescu. So he was illiterate and he studied with all these people. He was like, oh, you're supposed to do this?

But didn't quite get it. Yeah. You know those people are like, marriage is a country. with the state. Like, what does that mean? Like, I don't know. Yeah, yeah. I just kind of fell ass backwards. Yeah, and so that was him. So he was just like, let's pay off all the debts. We're not in debt. And we're like, we'll just have rolling blackouts to make up for it. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's communism. That's like crazy because like my, my family's Russian and then my, my, but my grandmother's

like, yeah, I was born in Romania and then they just changed what Romania was. Yeah, yeah. When I asked my dad, like, where did your father grow up in Romania? It's all, yeah, yeah, you're like, it just changed all the time. Constantly. But yeah. But yeah. But yeah. Laos was lost I'd like to go back because last was to do it right I just want to go back to that tubing place and I heard they temporarily actually shut it down because like people were dying with too many deaths I think it's back up Let's go back. Yeah, yeah, I would love to go there. There's a good comedy there's so many expats there too where I think like you can kind of you've done comedy out there right? Not in Laos because I didn't make it there but but me and more I went to a place where there was a show and I'm like I'm on vacation I'm like on vacation it was my first week and yank on I was like I don't want to go to this on the Wednesday when there's a comedy show but it was all like British comics and stuff kind of

Yeah, and then my friend, Childress, talking about a few places, he brought me to Bangkok, but he was living in Myanmar. Okay. William Childress, he brought me out there. And were people, where are you? And there's a scene, so if you're in the Hong Kong scene,

you go do shows in Seoul, you go do shows in Myanmar, you go to shows in, not Indonesia, the other one right next to Malaysia? Malaysia. Yeah. The Malaysia, what they did was, they're like, come do shows here. Americans, Brits, that are ex-per, whatever, and it's like, great. Actually, you know what?

We're gonna bring our own, we're gonna have our own, emcees, you guys bring the features and the headliners. And then after a year that I was like, just bring the headliners. We got it in a new scene now. And then it's like, great, we learned nobody can from you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we got everything. Thank you.

When were you in Myanmar? 2017. 2017. So that was, like, because I remember when we... It was just opened up. It was just opened up. Like, we met this guy when we were in, I think we went to like Sapa,

which was like in northern... Sapa. Or whatever, northern Vietnam. Vietnam. You're like near the Chinese border. It's like all up in the mountains. Amazing or whatever. Sapa trees are really cool.

or like intertwined. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this guy was saying he, he snuck over because you were not supposed to go to Myanmar at the time because they had this whole military thing. And then he kind of snuck over and he said, but he's like, you can't,

like, can't talk about all sorts of stuff because they're like, you can get locals, like, killed. They changed the name of Myanmar from Burma to Myanmar because of bad press. Yeah. And they moved, they changed the name of the capital from Rangoon to Yangon. Yeah, I always wondered about that.

And then at some point that, yeah, it is the same country. They still talk Burmese. I know Burma in Myanmar, but I always wonder about the Yangon. Yeah. And then they just, they were like a lot of protests outside the capitals. Like, we're just going to move the capital of the middle of fucking nowhere. You guys ain't going to protest the middle of nowhere.

They took all the government officials like, you live in the fucking Sahara Desert now. You know, with all these Burmese pythots. So it was something I ask everybody. You got any, well, I was going to say if you had to do over again, you put on more deed, probably. Probably, probably bug spray. But honestly, yeah, I put on bugs spray. Any recommendations of what to do if people were there? In Laos, specifically, I mean, honestly, it's just this long prong is like the main thing to do there.

I don't remember what those little sets of islands are. I'm sure you could find them. But those are not in Laos. They're in Laos. Yeah, those little islands that I went to, they were just before Cambodia. They're probably at the bottom of the Mekong in. Oh, the island's on the river. The island's like off, yeah, on the river.

And it's just before you get into Cambodia. That does sound cool. And it's pretty, pretty badass. But Southeast Asia in general is, you know, you can get around with you. What's that? Anything you wish you packed with you and stuff like that? I don't think so because it was 2001 you can buy. They like everything gets made there.

Except I will say though if you're a bigger guy, it's actually difficult. Like I couldn't buy shoes there at all. I'd say you have to bring a pair of hiking shoes that you from home that you for sure. Yeah, you have to bring hiking shoes. And then, but it was 2007. So like, you know, I had like an iPod, but I didn't bring really like much much technology. stuff. I had a friend say the one thing his advice

was bring a small pills Bluetooth for hostels and you'll just be the hero of the hostel A small way? Like those pills Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and he goes If you can have like something to play music people like They will just love you, they'll take you For sure part of the scene Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but um

Yeah I mean I don't know what it's like now I'm curious like What Kosan Road is like now because I imagine I went there in 20 14 Yeah But I imagine it's still Very similar I mean Bangkok

I will say if you go to Bangkok Don't just go to Koshen Road Because Bangkok is a massive city There's tons of cool shit Just getting to the airport Takes an hour and a half Yeah but there's tons of cool stuff there

And some people go there And they literally only see Cozen Road and nothing else And then maybe like the little temple They say this with about the Louvre They gotta see the What's it called the The um

You know The lady smiling Mona Lisa? Monalisa, but they're like, you know also the Venus de Milo's there? There's like thousands of great works of arts and 80 of the most famous in the world and everyone just lines up to do Mona Lisa.

Yeah, yeah, for sure. You should actually just skip it and go see way more cool. I mean, the Louvre isn't even the best museum there. It's the one with the clock tower thing, the train station looking motherfucker. Oh, yeah, the Pelaida. I can't remember what it's called.

I went into that one. What piece of travel advice would you give just to everybody in general? In general. I'd see Piling a list Compiling a list Um

Good list of General travel I mean just Be very like easy going and flexible I think because I Flexibility Shit happens When you're traveling

You're in different countries And like You know it's just not gonna always go To plan I would say And so you have to just be fairly I like that Fairly flexible Because if you're not

You're just gonna That reminds me of There's a writing exercise I talk to my friend is like a travel writer. The guy Ralph Potts? Rolf Potts. Yeah, yeah.

He rules. Yeah. And so we were doing this once. I was doing his podcast. He told me something that reminded me of a story. And then I was like, oh, and I told sorry, that reminded him of a story and just keep going. I was like, you should do it through your class.

Yeah. Where someone just tells a two-minute story, everyone write down anything that reminds you up. And then go next, you, choose one, go. And then you talk for three minutes about something. And then everyone else were, oh, that reminds me of this, reminds me of that. You know, oh, train. We took a train in, you know, in Indonesia.

It's like, oh, Indonesia, I had food there. And all the food in the Andes was really good. You know, it just reminds you. So anyway, that being off your thing reminds me at this time in Myanmar where we're leaving. We're going to take a bus up in this region where, like, locals only, like, you're not allowed to really stay. We found out the hard way. But we're waiting for the bus. Some guys like, hey, where's the 10 o'clock bus?

And they're like, oh, it's gone. It goes, it's only 95. And they're like, well, it's at 10. I'm like, yeah, it was pretty full, so it just left. Yeah. Well, what else is just doing? And they're like, I don't know, so like, it's set 10. And they're like, sir, it's gone.

Yeah, it's gone. And he goes, we had a fucking power outage of my hostel. They're like, that's not connected with me. Yeah, like this type of traveling's not for you. Yeah, we're just watching this guy. And me and my friends were just like, we're at love, we're so free. The little travel group we made right there, guy from Newcastle, a guy from Seattle and a guy from, I forget where the black guy was.

Everybody touched his hair. He had dreads. I think he was British. And it was just like, dude, you're in a crazy cool place. Like Inlay Lake, Myanmar. Just fucking take another day. Yeah, exactly. You're there.

You got to, like you said, you got to come off your plan. Yeah. And you might have a thing. Like we went when we were in Cambodia. We had this whole, because we had an itinerary mapped out. And then we were in Phnom Penh. And then for we were like, had three days in Panamp. And then you had to get a visa to go to Vietnam because they have all these weird visa.

And they're super fucking corrupt. Like to go into Laos, you have to. to like literally just pay a guy who's like in a wooden like booth in the middle of a field like two dollars for your stamp but it's not like there's no official thing that says two dollars they're just like you just pay him two dollars and then I remember someone's like I'm not paying him and they're like well then you're not getting into Laos because he's corrupt and he's not letting you in he's not right but it's the way it's just like it is how it is or whatever and then but we were at this hostel in penan pen and then they're like we didn't realize you need a visa and so like

oh should we need a visa and so you'll oftentimes you'll do it through like the guy at the like the desk whatever he's like these office closed all weekend he's like it's not open on the weekends so then and this was like a friday it's like a Thursday and it was like a 48-hour processing and he's like yeah he's like you're probably here to like Monday or Tuesday now I had that in I had that in Indonesia getting to East Timor yeah same thing like oh every Swiss guy got right in East Timor Americans you had to get a visa yeah and I was like what same it closed till then I'm like what the fuck's supposed to do it goes glad you asked there's an island there that is fucking gorgeous yeah boat leaves in 40 minutes I'm like sick see you and I mean we had a great time

I don't remember what I did, but I remember great time. That gap year fucking trip to Southeast Asia is rules. Yeah. I was having a fight with like a Kylea Peterson's like Instagram. I was talking about how like all these people say once you have a kid, your life's over, but it's not true. And I was like, it is though. Yeah. Like no one I know who has kids does fun shit.

Like like what kind of fun. I'm like, I don't know, going to Mexico for Thanksgiving. Of course. And then like what else? I'm like traveling through Southeast Asia. And they're like, you sound like a gapier kid. I'm like, those kids rule. Yeah.

Yeah. What are you talking about? I would love to sound like one of them. Yeah, to have the freedom to literally just drop anything anytime and just go. Let's, to say, I'm not going to go to a real adventure. I'm going to fucking further west in Thailand instead.

Just change for the next two weeks. Yeah. It's like actual adventure. Yeah, it's like proper adventure. All right. Well, Danny, thank you very much.

Thank you for having me. You guys check out Danny's two podcasts, the boys cast. So he does just Ryan Long and noted Canadian homosexual. And, Bathhouse. Late and Homosexual. The Bathhouse.

which is a call-in show which is actually very fun yeah Wednesday nights and a low-value mail on Tuesday nights and what I do this call a different call-in show but it's not a comedy show it's just like I have really weird guests on on Tuesday night it's called low-value mail little valley email low value mail M-A-I-L just go to the YouTube channel low-value mail M-A-I-L you can catch all of the stuff and uh Danny can find on Instagram but yeah no I got kicked off of Instagram sorry but a month ago for uh sexual solicitation no they're like dude it's honestly because I don't even want to get it. We don't have time, but they,

I got kicked off. Someone has it out for me at Instagram and kicked me off for sexual solicitation, which I obviously did not do. So, free David. Danny Jokes 2.0. Also, sexual solicitation is like, that's all that's happening on Instagram.

Are you cute or you want to go out? But it's like all only fans, hens, pimping their only fans. That's all that happens. I know little prostitutes who still have their Instagram and I got kicked off. They need somebody like,

hey, come on, leave her alone. They need that. Well, that guy instead of your band. No, well, it's, I did. So you're not. on there what are you on well i'm on dandy jokes on twitter and then danny jokes 2.0 on instagram until they kick that one off but i had this super viral making fun of making fun of the queers for palestine thing and i think that's what got can that got it because all do you got to do is

get their ire and then they'll they'll report everything until they're like yeah i guess i know people reporting me yeah yeah for sure but it's like because the people who are moderators at uh queerer palestine was a funny post yeah but the people who are moderators at instagram and meta they're pretty sympathetic to queers and Palestinians and I was making fun of both of them at once so I think that's what did it. Yeah But anyways, Danny Jokes 2.0 in Instagram. Well look up Danny Polish

Yeah, you'll find me. Yeah, thanks and then check out Laos guys if you get a chance. I'll head out there. Yeah, go all the Southeast Asia. Thanks, buddy. Thank you. Well, that's the episode, everybody. Thank you very much. Danny Polisher for coming in and tells us about Laos. Do you see what I'm saying? It's a late last trip in a hospital

but also best episode nominees for both. You can find Danny Poloshuk on Danny Jokes on Instagram. YouTube is Danny P. Comedy. You can watch a live stream of his podcast on YouTube, low-value mail. It's Low-value Mail with Danny Poloshuck on Mondays and the Bath House on Tuesday, plus Patreon for the Boys' cast.

You can also go to his website, Danny P. Oh, sorry, Dannycomedy. where you can see is tour dates, Fort Worth. This is March. Fort Worth and March, Pittsburgh, Chicago, and Detroit, and April. Go to Dannycom. And now, it's time for the 2025 Trippy Awards. That building behind me, by the way, used to be the tallest building in Latin America.

Maybe South America. I don't know. Somebody told me that. And I kind of went with it. I'm juiced off fucking matto. Let's do them. Where are we? Start with the best picks.

The nominees were Ethan McKenzie, Joe, Sarah, and Ari for Ecuador, Julia Gallerati for Afghanistan, H and Kevin for the Route 66, Sam Talent for France, Andrew Schultzer Burning Man, and Tom Rhodes for Mongolia.

And the winner is for the second year in a row. It's an episode I was in. But I didn't take the pictures. Ethan McKenzie, Guatemala. Congratulations, Ethan. Play a game of boo-boo on me.

He did Tim Tam for me. Best guess was a tough one, because I had a lot of good ones this year. I mean, last year, too. Hamilton Morris in China, Ari Maddie about work visas. He's hilarious. He'll be back on.

He's already taped another episode. Steph Tolle for Scotland. Burke Kreischer in Vietnam. Paul Verzi in Italy. Seguer and Tiore and and Harlan Williams, the returning champ for Africa, not a country, but it should be. The winner is, Steph Tollup, guys, that episode was just so good with her dancing in Scotland. She's so funny.

The episode was so fucking good. Best guest, Steph Tollive, congratulations. Best trip. These are the big ones. These are the big nominees. Best trip. List and Sarah and Ari for Ecuador. Kevin at H for the Route 66.

What a fun trip that must have been. Burke Kreisher for Vietnam. Mike Vecchio in Aruba. Jim Norton, fucking a bunch of hookers in Brazil. Joe DeRosa going to China. A piece of shit, Jodorosa is. Harlem's Africa and Small Brain American from Myanmar. Best trip. Well, I got to say, I'm narrowed down to sometimes, like, what seems the funnest and the freest.

and some of it's in a time and place the person was in. You know? I mean, Mike Vecke-e-own's a Ruba one. Six months in Rube was great, but it's in a time where everybody was on a break. So he did COVID. He's among the nominees for winner of COVID. Me, Ronnie Chang, Mike Veckeone,

people that just did stuff. And then literally every other comedian got massive. Ronnie Chang's pretty big. So I'm going to go with a guy who first discovered that he could be this free. And he lives his life in that. matter and it all dates back to this trip to Vietnam. Bert Kreischer, best trip of the year award winner for a 2025 trippy.

Bert, this cup of mattoes for you. Worst trip was a no-brainer this year. It's Chris O'Connor. What fucking terrible, fucking sad trip you had in Switzerland. God, I would hate to be that. Most surprising, this came down to really a two-horse race. A two horse race. The nominees were Chad Wallin for Ghana.

I didn't know. He's gone there. Steph Tolliv for Scottish Dance. Carmen Lynch for doing ayahuasca in Peru. She's not an ayahuasca person. She's not a drug person. Tom Seagora for getting laid for once. I only knew him as a part of a couple. But the really two big nominees are Andrew Schultz for doing Burning Man.

A drug festival. And that guy's a winner. And then Tucker Carlson for not getting into politics for an entire episode. About the UAE. And was honest, I was like, what about the slavery? Yeah, that is not good. I'm going to give it to Andrew Schultz. In a close one.

In a close one. Because honestly, I don't know. It was a coin flip. I'll be honest with it. It was a coin flip. Tucker Carlson and Andrew Schultz. Tucker Carlson, I mean, everybody thinks he's just political, but I'm like, no, he's a great traveler. That part was surprising.

But he'll be as surprising every single one. Andrew Schultz going to a fucking steampunk festival. That guy's almost straight-laced. You can barely get him to drink a Heineken. So Andrew Schultz, congratulations on your most surprising trip. Dumbus move. Okay, the nominees, it's Tom Segorah for where shit, fucking a German backpacker with no con, H. Foley for shitting himself on the bus, Mark Gagnon for mocking a UAE cop,

Joe List for drinking warm tea in Ecuador. He's got to steam, he's got to, and Jordan Jensen for his skinned and scammed in to help building a fake recycling plant. Sugora, congratulations on your win for dumbest move. It wasn't that you fucked a backpacker at all with no condom. Fucking is actually not a dumb move at all. That's a great move. And it wasn't so much that you fucked without a condom.

That is dumb, a backpacker. It's that you fucked a German without a condom. They ass fuck, dude. There's ass diseases. their specific ass-fuck diseases you open yourself up to it's not just those two it's that you realized that you shouldn't have done it and then you went back and you did it again

blasting dude you can't blast are you out of your fucking mind I mean I guarantee you Christina did not know this story before she married you what a dumb fucking and when you told me I was like no dude you got away with one and you would think that would be the best sexual adventure but it's not That brings us to our next award. The Best Sexual Adventure.

Emma Willemann for getting Pink Eye of fucking dyke behavior in the Netherlands. Tom Segora, fucking a German backpacker. A nominee, at least. Dragos, a Romanian friend, for doing upskirts in Tokyo. We've got another Japan episode coming soon. And Jim Norton, I mean, for the Brazilian hooker trip,

guys, this was a stuff of legends. Him, Patrice. Patrice was back to life for a short time. What a great one. Really, really. I just went back to Rio and this city, Sao Paulo, Rafi Bostos is my tour guide there, did not fuck a Brazilian hooker. And I'm sad to say, I apologize to you, Jim Norton, in the memory of Patrice.

I should have at least taken dildo to one. Best concert of the probably of the year. Oasis. Final concert of the fucking, of their. tour in Sao Paulo. Well, I was close, so it was easier for me to go. Drugs, you guys, oh, this is a fun one, the best drugs. And I mean, I got to give it to the master himself. We had Andy Haynes for the fake mushrooms he bought in Belize. Never got to Belize. It was so close. It was right at the border. Didn't get over there. I'm sticking on my

part, but you've got to pick your battles. Carmen Lynch for ayahuasca, I mean, really open and honest about it, a great one. I think she probably was second. Danny Brown for delivery of drugs in Barcelona, Ari Sheffir, that's me for snorting riddlin in Thailand on mushroom beach. But the winner, Hamilton Morris, the drug master himself, for not even doing drugs, but just for touring the drug labs of China, of Shanghai, Beijing, Shanghai, I think. It's the Trippy Trip-Trip. The Trippy-Trippy Award. I've got to rename some of these. Dumbest move, we've got to rename that. Any ideas for name? But best picks, best guests, best trip, worst trip, most surprising.

Maybe the No Way Award is most surprising. The Trippy Trip. Hamilton Morris, congratulations on your win. Best meal, I'm doing away with it this year. I didn't get enough nominees. Most adventurous. Small Brain American from Myanmar, Tom Rhodes for Mongolia, Harlan Williams, Africa, Chad Wallin in Ghana,

Julio Galauretti, whom I love. Afghanistan, Mike Corey, for Congo, and Carmen Lynch for doing ayahuasca in Peru in the jungle, not in somebody's house like everybody else does it. Doing it where it came from. That was a tough one. I think it came down to Harlan again. Julio, who I love and who has already recorded another episode. He'll be back on.

And I kind of want to give him an award. because Julio's, I mean, you think I'm the best traveler in comedy? It's Julia. I mean, the nominees are me, Giulio, Russell, the white guy, Jim Gaffigan, Yoshi, forget who else. But those are the ones that are up there for sure. Andy Haynes is up there. But Giulio, I think, is like, tops.

Just careers not as big as the other ones, though. I give me it to small brain. American for Myanmar. Man, you took me back. Going up there, being on the back of a fucking moped. It was just some dude, dangerous. I'm sure getting the fucking water food poisoning. God, that was great.

God, it really took me back to a place that I don't think you can go anymore. I think the government took control again. This one I'm not going to do, but the biggest piece of shit award. Came down to Graham K for selling arms to a fucking terrorist. Jason Ellis for just being a fucking complete cunt asshole in Germany. Yannis Pappas for sicking a lion on his friend who's scared of cats. Joe DeRosa for following a random guy into the woods in Thailand. And Louis J. Gomez for making his son jump into choppy, unsafe waters,

despite his son's request to say, please, Dad, have mercy, I don't want to do this. You were right, son. You were right. You shouldn't have done it. Dude, two-party here. It's tough. It comes down to obviously, Graham Kay did terrible things for society. Giannis was just a dick. I think he's out.

He's not a biggest piece of shit. It was just a dick, and the lion wasn't really dangerous. Yonis would be my award winner for the biggest dick move at a baseball game of all time, and that was a legendary move. I don't think I can give it to DeRosa.

The problem is, DeRosa is my friend, who is the biggest piece of shit I know. And then Louis Gomez for doing that to his son. So he really comes down to Graham K, selling arms the dealers. As a, you know, kid, really, young 20s, who really didn't know any better. Couldn't really, you don't really know any better

than to not take a job at that point. And... I'm fucking juice. I've got to stop drinking this. Ola. And... It's okay. I'm French.

And Louis Gomez, for making his son jump off. when he shouldn't. Who should know better? So I'm going to do a two-parter. Here's a two-parter of this award. I'm going to give it to Louis J. Gomez. Because not only should he know better, and not only did his son ask him to know better.

But he's a full adult who should know better. But I'm going to give it to Louis Gomez, but I'm also going to rename the award for Biggish Piece of Shit to not leave out the Biggish Pits of Shit I know, Joe DeRosa. So Louis J. Gomez, congratulations. you've won the newly renamed Joe DeRosa Trippy Award for biggest piece of shit of the year.

What have we got? Two more. I think one we'll do away with. Nah, no, we won't. Best travel buddy, we're not doing. Most dangerous, we're not doing. That might be Julio. That's probably my quarry. But most disgusted.

It came down to Adam Rowe for puddles of urine. all over India, but they didn't step in any. Joe List for taking a tour of Ecuadorian gas stations to shit away everywhere. Bertford for getting those ear cleaning out there. And H. Foley for just shitting himself on a bus in front of friends, which is, I think, more disgusting than shitting in a bathroom. All the bathrooms you have to go in is tough. All the bathrooms you have to go in is tough.

But doing it in front of your first. friends. I mean, that's disgusting in a different way. What the fuck's wrong with you, man? It's almost like you're a piece of shit, but you're not. You're just disgusting. H. Foley. You won the most disgusting thing of the year award. And finally, the Makes You Want to Go Award. This comes down to the episode, the trip that, the guest, that makes you want to go there more than anybody else. Joe Les and Sarah and Ari and Ecuador, myself and Paul Verzi and in uh making our two two in switzerland i guess making our two countries a year bet that hopefully should rubbed off on many of you go to one country a year at least um harle williams africa

makes me want to go to safari for sure julia galarotti afghanistan does make me want to go to tom roads made me want to go to mongolia berkreche made me want to go to vietnam and be free like that small brain american made me want to go back to meynemar and ethancy made me want to go to guatemala but I did. And I kind of got it out of my system. The final award for the Trippy 2024, 2025 award. If it makes you want to go, is a married couple, Joe List and Sarah Tolabash.

Congratulations on your Makes You Want to Go Trippy Award for 2025. That's it, you guys. That's the episode. Please subscribe wherever you're watching and listen. Next week, Punky Johnson takes us to Jamaica. Show you the rest of this place. To me, it says Jamaica in a, please say I'm recording. Okay, yeah.

So that's the square. Can you see it? There's a little fucking whatever there. They've got, uh, water that way. The water goes all the way around this place. Ten cents to whoever guesses where this is. There's a flag there. Where is it?

There it is. Can you see it? You got a punch in and it's tough. And then more water there. And it goes all the way, why it goes all the way around. As balcony is that, man, I wish I could see people fucking, Punky Johnson takes us to, okay, ah shit.

That's my alarm. Unprofessional, R. Unprofessional. I gotta go do a Zoom meeting. No. So that's it, you guys. That's the episode. Thank you very much to all the 2025 U.V Trippin' Trippie Award winners.

Get your sticker right now at Ariashivore.com or at the bottom of your screen, You can put it up anywhere. I'm going to put it up over there. At this hostel I'm staying at. And wherever you go, you guys, don't forget to take your Burt Kreischer slides. No, not slides. Flip Flops with you. He doesn't call them flip flops, but they're flip flops.

The most comfortable flip flops I've ever owned. Look, they've got the fucking beer cans in there. I didn't pay for them, so I don't know if they're cost effective or not. But I honestly don't know where to get them. I ask Bert. I suggest you ask Bert as well. But that's it, you guys. Until next week with Punky Johnson, I'm Ari Shafir, saying, win your own Trippy Awards.

Should I be saying that? Get sick. Go to a hospital on your own. Find out what hospitals are like all over the world, doing your own tourism. Whether it's like Henry Rollins, doing record stores, or Danny Polishuk visiting sand-floored hospitals in Laos. Wherever you are, it's pretty excited, and in the worst moments will eventually become the best memories. That's gay. I'm Ari Shafir.

Goodbye, everybody. Thank you.