You Be Trippin' - Mexico w/ Mark Normand | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: March 30, 2026

_The End_ is Ari's new storytelling show! It's almost here! Premieres April 16 on https://theend.ymhstudios.com/. Presale pricing only available for a short time! You get 7 full, hour long episodes of completely unfiltered stories for $24.99. Go watch Mark’s new Netflix special None To Pleased and follow him here: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marknormand YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@marknormand Website: https://marknormandcomedy.com SPONSORS: -Start your new morning ritual & get up to 43% off your @‌MUDWTR with code TRIPPIN at https://mudwtr.com/TRIPPIN ! #mudwtrpod -Grab your own pair of The Dillon Freewaters flip-flops while supplies last at https://freewaters.com Thanks to YMH's very own Katelyn for help with this flipflop ad!!!! Ari Shaffir is joined by the always-quick, always-quirky Mark Normand for a wild ride through Mexico on this week’s You Be Trippin’. From the chaos of Matamoros—complete with hooker bars, cockfights, and a truly unhinged donkey show—to a hilariously disturbing story involving one of Mark’s friends, things escalate fast. Mark then shifts gears to Mexico City with his wife, diving into incredible food, floating canals, live comedy shows, and even a parasite scare. The adventure continues in Guadalajara with a visit to Frida Kahlo’s house, plus lucha libre, midget wrestling, and all the cultural curveballs you’d expect. They wrap it up with future travel dreams, road wisdom, and why traveling comics are just built different. You Be Trippin' Ep. 112 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://arishaffir.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:48 - We Are Going To Mexico! 00:05:19 - Hooker Towns 00:15:44 - Fentanyl Conspiracy 00:23:10 - Going To A Donkey Show 00:50:11 - Going To Mexico City With The Wife 00:51:51 - Mexico City Canals 00:57:32 - Doing Shows In Mexico City 01:00:42 - Adventuring To Guadalajara 01:05:18 - Lucha Libre & Midget Wrestling 01:09:27 - Frida Khalo's House 01:14:14 - La Promesa Museum 01:17:35 - Wife Catches A Parasite 01:27:42 - Traveling Comics Are A New Breed 01:32:35 - New Spots To Check Out 01:40:13 - Where Does Mark Want To Go Next? 01:44:01 - Travel Advice 01:47:06 - Outro Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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at the best price. You can't use any of this. This is a bad pot. I was drinking. They have this in the Amazon. They have this like booze they make. You like this as a booze bag. Also, you've got a great podcast

when I'd be drunk that I've done. I remember some of it. Speaking of booze bags. I remember some of those podcasts. Sure. They make this like corn liquor. They churn it up, whatever, like pound it down, put in their mouth,

swish it around. and then spit it out and then buried underground until it ferments. Yeah, I mean, it's not my idea of a good time. No. And then they give it to you and you're just an asshole if you're like, no thanks. Whoa. And it's just in this bucket and they just pass and you drink. And I'm like, how much?

Like, is my goat but guzzle it? Yeah. And I'm like, no. And then with some fucking monkey that they captured on my shoulder. Whoa. And it fucks you up? Oh, yeah. Holy shit.

Oh, yeah. Checha, something like that. Checha. Where you've been and where you're going. This is our Reast Travel Show, yeah. We're going to talk about travel today. It's U.B. Trippin, yeah. Hi, everybody.

Welcome to U.B. Trippin. It's a travel podcast. It's the only podcast that is staunchly against sobriety of any kind. If you're not fucked up, either on alcohol or cheetah. Weed, cheetah, or even drugs, then you're not really living. Yeah. Every week we go to a different place with a guest who's been there. It's not, guys, we don't really know what we're talking about.

It's just with the things we've seen. And today, one of the most ignorant people in America. Mr. Mark Norris. Yeah, you got that right, Faddy. From Tuesday's stories, we might be drunk. One of the greats. Where are we going today, Mark? Where do you want to go?

We are going to get deported, and we're going back to Mexico. Mexico. We're waving the flag on a burning Waymo in L.A. That's us. Nice. Where'd you go to Mexico? Where is it? It's our biggest neighbor that feels foreign.

No offense, Canada. Yeah. Well, I've been to Mexico a couple of times for a couple of different reasons. The first time we went was called Matamora. It's under the Texas border. Okay. And it's a border town. I called it Boys Town.

Because troops used to go there to get laid real quick. There it is. Matamoros. Okay. There it is. The map. I should know how to spell. place I've been to, but it was pre-internet. Mattomoros.

You just started driving with a map back then. This is 2000. Whoa, it's so hard to get to anywhere there. Wait. Okay. Yeah, there it is. Right on the border. Right in the Gulf of.

Look at it. They already did it on Google Maps. Gulf of America. Holy shit. They did it. That's hilarious. Wow. We went to that White House.

Shane got it sent. I opened for him down there and we were going to go take a tour and call the public says, can you get us in-in? And they were like, yeah. Whoa. He's got some level. I think he knows people. the CIA or something. Oh yeah for sure. He knows

Hague, Seth. Yeah. But yeah, and we looked in the, like the, where his desk is, Trump's desk, you know, where Elon's always dancing behind him. Oval Office? Yeah, but he's a big map, Gulf of America. Because they're right on there. That was quick. Yeah. Damn.

Okay, so where'd you go there? Why? When? Well, I mean, I was in college. I lived in a house with five guys and someone got a wild hair up their ass and said, from Baton Rouge, it's not a bad drive. It's probably like five, six hours, something like that. Okay. And yeah, around there. I went down there with four guys. It was five was total. And we cut loose. We, you know, met hookers. We saw a donkey show. We ate street tacos. Street tacos were 50 cents. So I had a field day down

there. The guy would make them right there, these little silver dollar tacos. How were they? They were amazing. They were so good. And, you know, we got a cheap place in Texas right on the border. and we just walk over every day. Just wake up and walk over. And, you know, drink our faces off. They do a thing there where they put booze in your mouth and then they shake your head. And then you're more fucked up.

So a guy walks by with like a jug of some weird elixir. And he goes, ugh, and you go, yeah, lay it on me. You give him like a dollar and you do this. And he pours in your mouth until you can't take it. And then he takes your head and shakes your head. What? Yeah, that's what they do. And that's just a guy walking around.

Instead of doing one of these where you've got a lick. Yeah, you're the shaker. Like we don't shakeer money. No, no, Shaker Heights. But Michael J. Fox, they really fuck you up. They just shake you like Parkinson. And yeah, you can get drunk there for like, you know, $4.50. What?

And plus like a tecate or a soul or whatever is, you know, 28 cents. It's so cheap. God, the prices are so great in other places. It's great. Especially as a college kid. I know. You can go to that. down there with like 50 bucks for a weekend.

Wow. Lived like a king. Did you get sick off the tacos or is they fine? No, I have an iron stomach. You cannot get me sick. I've been eating shit. Facts, I've seen Mark Norman eat leftovers off other people's foods for going on 10, 12 years now.

Easily. Just at restaurants. He's like, ooh, they didn't clear it. Yeah, well, my mom's an old hippie-dippy-dippy queef. So she would have like old milk in the fridge. She'd have old chicken bones and shit like, so you just ate anything. Yeah, I'm a raccoon. Yeah.

So we'd go down there. We'd get fucked up. Crazy story. The hookers really... Yeah, it's got to be a hooker town. They come around, yeah. Border towns are always hooker towns. All hookers.

It's hookers, cockfights, drinking, and donkey show. That's like the big... Those are the big attractions. We've got to bet to all those. Okay, we'll do. You ever been to a cockfight? In East Timor, yeah. Oh, really?

Yeah, one, but I went back like three times. It's great. It's like the poor guys waving cash. Weaving cash. It's great. And they're like, oh, I bet, I bet. Which one you bet? They're always like, the big one.

one. I'm like, yeah, I also want the big one. I know, come on. But then someone's like, I'll hear a dollar, go ahead. Every now that you get a ringer in there, like some crazy pecker that just kills anybody. You know, what's crazy, but the cockfight is they fuck with them with a stuffed, stuffed animal chicken. Get them riled up. Get them riled up.

Yeah. It's like the speed bag. They got a whole system. Yeah, they do this where they take it like that. Yes. The rooster to get them like, bring it. Bring it. Bring it, motherfucker. Oh, I'll beat you in the ring. Exactly. Would you call me? So, yeah, that was And they last like, I don't know, 90 seconds.

Yeah. And then they start pecking the eye out after. It's pretty barbaric. They put the razors on them? No, I didn't see that. Oh. Did you have that? Yeah, they called the Futumut, the bound foot.

And they tie a razor to one of their claws. So when they go, they normally just, they fight like this. They jump up and fight like that. Yeah, yeah. One razor on there. Whoa. So this. And then one of the roosters doesn't know, like, he didn't really hit me that much because

it slices on a razor. And then suddenly like, you feel kind of woozy, though. Yeah. Yeah. And then just cleats. See, that's too far. I'm okay with the two birds going at it, but once you get the razors in,

they gotta have some standards. Yeah. I don't know. This guy pulled out of rate, they have a book. You know, those old CD cases? Yeah.

They had that of razors. And this guys were looking through. One guy had a fucking cross on his head. He was so fucking badass. And then he picks one out. He goes like this. Everyone cheers. Whoa.

And then he taught it. That's dark. Yeah. Isn't that crazy that? We love comedy. We podcast. That's their comedy. Some guys out there with a fucking rooster

like this is my special place. Was it legal there? Oh yeah. I mean, everybody's out right. They're not trying to hide it. No, it was out in the wild.

It was like the Olympics. It was a big deal. It was a place was packed. Yeah, I was like, hey, I can't take a picture of those, could I?

And then people like, why wouldn't you be able to? Yeah. Well, your cockfights. Like, yeah, I mean, it's the general's brain. Yeah, exactly.

He gave it to us. Right. It's a state sanction. There's celebrities there. It was great. Yeah. So that was cool. You do that during like the day.

That's like a four o'clock thing. And then at night it was just on. Wow. It's like 18, 19 year old strapping men. Even coming from Louisiana, that still must be a jump up in legality. Way drop off, big drop off. Kids are drinking. You know, there's kids running around in diapers.

It's bad news, but fun for us. Okay. And so there's a horror bar that was like the trans. bar, there's a, the slut bar, whatever. This is all, this is like, get fucked up bar. There's a trans whorehouse with just trans women. So it was ahead of its time, really. I did a podcast.

I don't even remember that one of the early Skang Fest when it was really like, still like, whoa, if you're trans, somebody came out for a naked roast. Yeah. With their dick tucked. And you couldn't tell. Yeah. So it was like fine. And they came out and then they opened their legs and the dick popped. And it was like, what the fuck?

Except for DeRosa. It was like, yes. Now it's almost Blasey, but like, I've actually seen it a few times. I'm like, Slossus Luster. Oh, really? Yeah. But what she told me was like, there's no trans bars because we don't want to hang out with trans. Gays want to hang out with gays.

Blacks want to hang out with blacks. Jews want to hang out with Jews. Trans want to be not that at all. Is that right? Yeah, like, I'm a woman, though. I want to hang out at a straight bar. But you'd think you'd want to hang out with somebody who's been through the surgery that you went through and the pronoun shit.

Yeah, you're right. Oh. But like, I don't want to fuck these people. Yeah. You know it'll be a good name for a trans bar. cockfight Not bad All right

Not bad You got any good names of K bars I have one in DC What The hung jury Oh That's great

That was a fun one That's great All right We'll make this a Running gag Running gag Running gag All right

We'll keep it going Throughout the show Hung jury is good Okay So there's always weird parts. Yeah, there's all these weird things to do. We're all sleeping in, you know, like two beds in a room and like a holiday in whatever on the border or a lakinta. What is Likinta? What does that mean? La Quinta. Yeah, what is it? Is that a princess? Oh, is it? I don't know. Or queen. Maybe queen would make more sense. The queen? The fifth. The fifth or the country house. That's got to be it. That's got to be it. Okay, we had a few fifths. But, um, so we go there and so now, Of Hacienda, yeah, that's it. Once you start getting hammered, then you start kind of looking at the, the horror houses were just like a relic.

We're like, oh, that's crazy. Look at that. Or a novelty. But after you start getting hammered, you're like, eh, people take a look in there. You know, let's scope around. I mean, loud and clear, when you're like, it's not my thing, but you just keep seeing the casualness of it. Yes. And no one caring.

Right. Guys are going in and out, in and out. So you're like, well, how does that work? I just got questions. What does it look like in there? That's our Coke is. Oh, right. You're like, no, no, no.

Oh, you're doing it? All right. Yeah. It's like eventually, it's like, okay. Yeah, well, this is pre-Fentanyl, too, by the way. Yeah, right. When did fentanyl come in? I think right around COVID.

Oh, really? Hi, everybody. Ari Sharfair here. Break it in today's episode to let you know a little bit about the guest, Mark Norman. He's one of the top comics working today, and that's not like an exaggeration. His last for a minute are like nobody. The way he writes jokes is, I mean, if you don't know how to tell when someone's autistic, just look at his output. Just look at his output.

And Mark is appearing in the most anticipated comedy show of all time. The End, Ari's renamed, renamed, renamed, Rennamed Storytelling Show, known as The End. He's in an episode called Not All Heroes Wear Caps, with other storytellers, Ari Sheffir, and Duncan Truzzle. Great episode. You can buy just that episode if you like at Ari Sheffir.com,

starting on April 16th or that'll be $599. Let's call it $6. Or if you want, you can buy the entire series for $29.99. Let's call that $30. But right now, if you pre-buy it before it's out, but you can get it all for $25, $24.99. Owee, what a deal. Mark Norman kills in it.

So does Duncan. So do I. Actually, that episode is my favorite story that I've told possibly ever. It's whatever. Anyway. 24.99. So what is that? Seven episodes, by the way, of pretty much an hour each. So seven, 14, 20. So that's $3.30. No, $3.50 each. Bro. For an hour long, high, high quality, pretty much seven specials.

Plus a prologue that is a surprise that you will love. The end. Available right now for pre-order at aurehafeer.com. There's click on the link right now below if you're watching it on YouTube or if you're listening on Spotify or watching on Spotify. Did they get video since I've been gone? Anyway, that's it, and that's what you want to do. If you've ever wanted to support me in my life and the outsider kind of way I do comedy,

I'm telling you, this is the way. Go by the end. Get every episode. They're great. Other episodes include Tom Segura. I'll just tell you the headliners, I guess. Greats from the old This and Not Happing show, like Miss Pat, Big J. O'Cerson, Ali Sadeek. Who else is in it?

Christa Stefano, Tony Hinch. Shangecliff, Shane Gillis, Nate Bargazzi, Sam Talent, Robert Kelly, Joe List. Guys, it goes on and on. Steve Simone, Jesser Reed, favorites from the old show. I mean, it just keeps going. I mean, I keep forgetting people, because it's 23rd. Roy Wood Jr. Roy Wood Jr. is so good that he makes me think I'm a shitty comic.

He makes me realize I'm a shitty comic. So go get it right now at R.HVIR.com. There's a VIP package with a limited edition poster that I will sign before we send them out, which also you should get. But anyway, that's it. In the meantime, to whet your whistle on Mark Norman, because when you buy that, by the way, when you buy it, it's going to be available to stream for a year past when I stopped selling it. So if you get it, no less than a year, you'll have all seven episodes.

But I'm, listen, because I don't know if you know this about me, but I'm not going to stop selling it. Especially when the price goes up from $25 to $30. No, I'm going to keep selling it. it. The last day I sell, you'll still have at least a year to watch it. Buenos Carlos. I don't know who that is. I'm not going to answer it. In the meantime, Mark Norman, if you want to wet your whistle on Mark Norman, he's got a new special out on Netflix, the People are 11 called None Too Pleased. What a prolific guy. I think he might be the second most prolific comic in America behind Ali Zedek, who was on episode of these.

end called Four Stories About Trying to Come, starring Big J. O'Cerson, Tony Hinchcliffe, Steph Tolliv, and Ali Sadeek. Mark's also on the road, as always, that's a guaranteed good date night. Guaranteed. Or if she walks out, that's a good lady to like get out of your life. Starting in April, Lexington, Kentucky, Fort Lauderdale, Minneapolis, Raleigh, Spokane, Philadelphia, Milwaukee, Irvine, Tempe,

Royal Oak, Michigan, and Cleveland, Ohio, all the way through July. Get tickets at marknormancom.com. But guys, first and foremost, right now, whatever you're doing, click on the link below and support me and my outsider ways by buying for just $25. Seven hour-long episodes of the greatest storyteller show ever made in history. Support me, support live independent comedy, support Mark Norman, and laugh. It'll be out for 420. Watch the whole weekend. Let's get back to Mexico.

Hamilton Morris was in here. He's had a possible explanation because he's all about, I was like, what happened? He goes, I think it was two things. One, everyone doing shitloads of drugs during the pandemic. Yep. And so their hearts were all weakened. So it wasn't just the fentanyl. It was in relation to like, I have friends that did Molly every day for two months.

Wow. So that shit's like, you know, whatever. And you get one little dose batch. And you can't handle it anymore. Your heart couldn't. And the other was whatever trade shit with China. Yeah. We won't take your stuff anymore.

And then so the base chemicals for drugs were from, there and they made them really well. It was the same way they make shower curtains really well. And now we had to turn to fucking RVs in the fucking Tucson for our base chemicals. And that's where all the fentanyl got leaked in and shit. Whoa. Okay. Yeah.

There you go kids. Anyway. So we go to this. So one of our friends, I should say, was six, nine. He was as a big dude. He was a football player like corn fed white boy. Southern dude. You know, just a stocky, tall motherfucker.

We go to bars. Everybody wanted to fight. Everybody. Oh, really? Yeah, because he was just the tall guy. So they're like, I bet I can take him. It was bad. I would hate to be this guy.

Women loved him, but the guys, he was always up against it. Damn. You know, everywhere you go, hey, you play basketball. How tall are you? It's like a circus freak. But good guy. Yeah. Fun fact about him, he would see his own blood.

He would just pass out. He broke our coffee table because he got cut his hand and he just went right to the coffee table like Chris Farley. What is super power if you're fighting him? You're just kind of like. Yeah, that's true. You razor blade on your foot. Cut him open and he, and he got dropped and he would go. I think there's a name for that.

Hypo, no. Some. Seemic, I don't know. Some congeic. Anyway. Anyway, so we go to this bar and there's like a bunch of hot ladies walk around and lingerie and we're like, okay, this is a brothel. Nice.

Love it. We're sitting at the bar bar and there was stairs above, like going up behind the bar, like where we're sitting. You see stairs that go up to the horror bar. beds. And so we're like, oh, wow, look at that. Just walking, watching them walk up. Oh, boy, she's pretty hot.

Wow, these girls are actually pretty fit and they're not like hoary looking, not like beat up where we're sitting there. And all the girls are like whispering about our friend. Yeah, I'm sure. They want to fuck that. Yeah, this big white guy. Or don't let him fuck me. One of the two.

One of the two. So the bartender is like snickering. It's just like some Mexican guy, some young guy. And he's like, the girls, they like you. They like you. And he was like, ah, you know, what are you going to do? Don't worry about it. And they kept being like, he wants, they want you to go upstairs.

They give you discount. They give you discount. And he was like. Discount on a woman. Yeah, he's like, you think I should? Oh, man. We're like, do it. What are you crazy?

Come on. That's peer pressure central. Yeah. You never have a better peer pressure opportunity than that. So we have a couple more drinks and he's like, fuck it. I'm in. Yeah. We'll have a good time.

We've high five. We blow each other. He gets off the bar stool. He goes arm and arm with two women. they walk him up the stairs and as they're walking up the stairs we're like boy look at the thighs on that broad

holy hell man she's got some some shoulders huh how about that boy that's a tight butt it's a small butt but it's up we're like eh whatever now he's up there for 10 minutes

and all the bartenders are howling laughing they're like talking in Spanish laughing pointing at our friend up there and we're like huh what's going on there come on

and we're like weird okay so he comes down Oh, good name for a trans bar. Weird, okay. So he comes down and the bartender's now fucking with him like, ah, uh, umbra, umbra, and we're like, ombray, oh, he must be talking about our friend.

And we're like, could that have been a dude? Did he just fuck a dude? What the hell? And he comes down and he goes, you're not going to believe this. She let me fuck her in the ass. Oh! And we all died laughing. We lost it.

We hit the floor. He's like, what's so funny? We're like, you fucked a guy. You fucked a guy. And it was before any like trans, you know, rights or talk about trans. It was like 2003 or something. And he was like this big buff like man's man. And he went back to the hotel.

He never went out again. That was like night two. Never went out again. We drove back like seven hours. And we drove back. It was like a seven hours. He didn't say a word. And he got married like six months later.

I was like, I'm done. I'm done whoring it up. He's like, I'm not gay. I got to prove it? Yeah, he was like a religious guy. He was an old school guy. And that fucked him up. Oh, that's great.

He's a different man now. Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah. He was changed. I've seen him since and he's not the same guy. He was like a happy go lucky guy. Now he's like stoic and quiet. That used to be where you were like, I think I'm allowed to kill them.

Oh, yeah. me into that. Oh, yeah. Back then, it was like such a like a what? Yeah, well, it was one of those things where we'd fuck with him and you could tell like, we should stop fuck with him. This is, this isn't funny anymore. It's like dark and weird.

Because you don't really care, but it's funny. Yeah, of course. And we knew he cares. So we're just zinging him about it. But he just, he changed after that. Rogan used to have a joke about people experimenting with homosexuality. And he's like, once you suck the dick, you're just a dick sucker. For instance, there's no going back.

And he goes, you can't win an argument anymore. Because your friend's like, well, yeah, I sure you think that, but that's actually not the way economics work. It's like if you pour money into the economy, it actually goes to lots of stuff. And so, like, you're way off on that. I go, uh, didn't you suck a dick once? Yeah, exactly.

It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, what do you call that? Trump cards? Yeah, Trump card. Yeah, he should sell Trump cards. Oh, yeah. Yeah, why didn't he sell Trump cards? It's right there. Good point.

Or trumpets. Trumpet supporter. Yeah. So, yeah. It would have been January 6th, a lot better if they were just like, they did whatever line, what do they call? Second line. Second line.

Second line. They were like, that was festive. Right. A couple too many deaths, but festive. That's true. If they had brought a marching band, it would be a whole different J6. Yeah. That's true.

So yeah, he fucked a guy and then, uh, and I don't even think these were like trans. These were just, these were just. Dudes hiding it? Dudes. Yeah, with, uh, with lingerie. Hey, what happened to transvestites? Yes. Where have they been?

Good point. They were all the rage. I think you're not allowed to say that anymore. But transvestite and transsexual is a different thing. It's completely different. Well, my nanny was a transvestite. Oh, yeah. Which we just called...

Transvestite. Which we called a cross-dresser back in the day. Because he was like, yeah, I'm a guy, but I like to wear women's clothing. Like Eddie Azard. A person who dressed in clothes primarily associated with the other sex typically use of a man. There you go. Here's a problem. That's out the window now.

Bad bunnies wearing. dresses, everybody's wearing dresses. That shit's like done. You can't be a transvestime. Everyone's wearing everything. Dennis Rodman. He did it. He was doing it when it meant something.

Yeah, true. Wedding dress. Oh, that's right. Wow. Yeah, crazy. So that was like night two. So night three, we get drunk again, blah, blah, blah. We do the whole song and dance.

And a guy walks up and goes, do you want to see the donkey show to me and my friends? And we're like, This is legendary. We have to see the donkey show. And he's like, it's a bit of a ride. You got to get my truck. So this is all very risky. You know,

there's not like, there's no form or signage on his truck. It's just you get in a guy's truck. You've just met a Mexican guy with a dirty outfit and a hat and a beard. And he's like, you want to go to the donkey show? It's five bucks. And we're like,

okay. So we went. It's so funny. You're like a parent now. I know. I know. But like, no,

but I'm saying like, imagine your kid old. like 20 telling you they're going to get in a car with a random Mexican. You'd be like absolutely not. Of course. That is crazy. I would never do that. Yes.

And you'd be like, you did it. We were here 192. You did it. I drove a moped here with no helmet over the bridge. If he did that, I'd kill it. Yeah. So yeah. If he did comedy, I'd really kill him.

It's all these things. We're like, I wouldn't do that now myself. I wouldn't just get like, guys, what are we doing? We're not just getting in. We're going to get robbed. And back then, that age, it's like, well, there's no danger in the world. I know. There's no danger in the world.

you're like, well, maybe we'll get robbed. That could be interesting. That'd be fun. Something to do. You have nothing to lose back then. Yeah, you have nothing. Like, what did they kill me? There'll be no loss to the world.

I've done nothing. I've accomplished nothing. So true. And there's a freedom in that. Yeah. You get into a back of a dirty truck with like, there's like fruit rolling around in the truck because the guy's been migrating all day.

Picking all day. Yeah. And yeah. So we got in the back of the truck. We drove for like 20 minutes. And the whole time you're back there shaking in a bed of a truck. Like, you think he's actually going to do this? Are we going to go somewhere else?

Is this safe? But you're shithoused. Yeah, right. Oh, drunk helps. That helps. So you get in a car with them. Get in a car. It's like, you know, midnight.

We pull up to a barn. There's other guys on the barn. You see other college people, too. So you're like, all right, all right. This is kind of safe. This is legit. It is reassuring. You don't want any white people to be when you're traveling, but that's something's like,

it's nice to have a couple. Yeah. Just make sure I'm not the only one. That's so true. Whenever I go hiking, I get, like, paranoid or like, animals. I'm like, fuck, fuck, there might be bobcats here, and then I'll see a human footprint. I'm like, oh, we're good.

Yeah, you see a Zen? You're like, all right, right, people come here. Some honkeys have made their way here. I wonder if that's how settlers felt, like when they came over from England, and then they're like, oh, shit. No one's been here. No one is here except for that chocktaw.

Yeah. That's terrifying. Does he seem friendly? He doesn't look friendly. Doesn't look friendly. He's shouting with a spear. Why is he so dirty? That can't just be his skin, could it?

No, he's got, like, face paint and necklaces of scalps and Oh, geez. I mean, imagine you're just some puritan Christian. Some blonde dude. I just heard there was lots of grass. Yeah, right. I just hated religion. Yeah.

I just want to come here and then I see a guy, you know, skinning a dude's scalp. You think they can pronounce Sven here? Also crazy that they had Thanksgiving with them. Yeah. That's pretty inclusive. I would be like, I'm not eating with these people. Oh, yeah. Very inclusive, right?

Yeah. I mean, it took a few years, but still. Do the timeline for me. It was Thanksgiving celebrating the first harvest that they helped them. Yeah. But harvest didn't in November. Oh, yeah. You got to give that a goog.

I don't know how that works. Because I think it must have taken a couple of years to warm up to the white man before the natives were like, all right, well, we'll eat with you. Thanksgiving. Series of historical decisions and proclamations primarily by U.S. presidents. Wait a minute. Yeah, but what? Early celebration. Yes, harvest.

Feast shared by Pilgrims and Wannapag people. So why then? 1621. Whoa. Oh, there we go. They broke bread. I mean, if you're that level of Christian, you'd probably be like, let's welcome them in. Yeah, I guess so.

And we can also, maybe we'll tell them about Jesus. And I think there's some like, hey, we get them a couple of turkey legs. Maybe they won't rape us. It's actually a harvest feast. There you go. But why would it be then? Huh. Well, maybe it was the end of the harvest.

Leave it in the comments. Call in, if you know. Call in right now. Taking calls it. Well, why can't you have a harvest? Oh, it's too cold. It's like November. It would all be dead.

I don't know. Yeah. But isn't a harvest where you collect a bounty of shit and save it? It occurred in the fall of 1621 when everyone came together. Hmm. Huh. It lasted only a few years. Then in 89.

George Washington brought it back, I guess. Said that's the day. maybe it's at the end yeah we just went to in that fucking town I'm sorry I just was there they celebrate a well

a successful whale hunt we got there they're like when I last year yeah when I landed they're like hey in a couple hours they're celebrating a whale hunt and I was like is this common like no they get like a couple of years

this is their celebration go join their little minds yeah they throw people up in blankets and we're fucking flying up in the air 20 feet I tried to do it I failed pretty horribly what do you mean the Bert Flip Flops by Freewaters

Back that ass Up They throw these people up Like 20 feet in the air Everyone gets a blanket Like a fireman thing Yeah Women

Women, old men Boys And they throw candy when they get in the air I mean they're 20 feet up in the air Whoa Yeah How did you fuck up It's a shaky thing

And then they go One two three go I just hit the grass I was like nope I don't feel comfortable Wow The old ladies are doing it It was wild

Damn, that's fun. Yeah, it was so fun. What the whale look like? Well, it was pretty cut up, but they let me have some raw one. Whoa. Yeah. Raw whale. Raw whale.

Raw whale. It was fucking wild. Holy moly. Boy, did you get any video? Yeah. Okay, great. Plug that in right here. Damn, butt plug. What a hair plug?

Okay, okay. So we got to the donkey show. It's on a barn at night. The moon is out. Everybody's holding a beer, like, what the hell is this? We get inside the barn. There's a big circle, a bunch of hay bales they make a circle out of, and everyone's standing around the hay bale.

They walk a lady in, she's like a pretty cute. And she must have been like 19 or something, 20, 21. And then they walk out a donkey on a leash, and the donkey's missing fur, and he looks a little banged up, little weathered. And they walk this donkey out. and she, four guys grab a leg each, and they flip the donkey over, so his legs are straight up.

She starts blowing the donkey. Crazy, huge donkey dong coming up, like a fifth leg. Yes. Gets hard, and then she takes the bottom off of her and then just sits on it. No! And I watched it for like, I don't know, 30 minutes, no.

I watched it for like 10 seconds, and I had to turn away. It was too much. It was like my rods and co. I couldn't take it. It was like, what's her story? Is the donkey okay? Where am I?

How big was the hog? I was big. It was big. It was like... She just got right on it? Just, I mean, she didn't go the whole way because this thing was like, you know, it was like, I don't know, what is that? Two feet? And it was thick and gray and weird and had...

She blew it hard. She got it hard. And they went on their stuff. That's not the way donkeys fuck, too. No. They get over you. So like, I'm on my stomach. I'm like, oh.

I think you've got to flip it so you're in control. You can't have him thrusting. Yeah, that's how that guy died. Right? Mr. Hans video. Yes, yeah. Oh. Oh, the horse, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, so I can't watch that either, by the way. Yeah, that's one. There's a couple that you watch once. Like, oh, it's funny. Like, watch it midway through the second time. You're like, oh, I just felt it. Yes.

I can't. That in the beheading video of the Einstein, Epstein, or whatever that journalist was. Oh, yeah, because it was a dull knife. Dull, he was like, ow, ah, and then done. Yeah. You expect to just go straight through. I know.

No, no, Bueno. So she banged this donkey and I had to like walk away and it was too much and then we got back on the truck and went back out drinking.

Wait, so you saw it and you were just like, I got to go outside or you just like I got to leave? I just kind of looked away and drank my beer and then she gets tips since she walked around. I got a bucket of tips and I gave her a tip. What? She already got quite one tip.

Yeah, donkey dick. and yeah it was it was a bit much and nobody you know it's one of those things where we all went in excited and everybody left quiet disturbed yeah your buddy fucked a dude or that had to see someone fucking a horse yeah he felt better

after that he's like I'm not the only one who's doing questionable shit not the only one who fucked a beast so yeah that was that was dark look at this look at this oh this is the whale Yeah, this is the celebration I put it in slow-mo But so they throw her up

And that's like part polar bear Part Wolverine Whoa Hey, that's fun Yeah You could have done this I know, I could have If I had it better

But I needed to get my bearing under me Yeah Wow They really throw them up too after a while That's great Very community A midday too Oh no buddy

That was 7 p.m. Oh, right. Something's going down. That's a lot of fun. It is. And so sometimes they'll take candy and they'll chuck it in one of the things and all the kids run in like a bar mitzvah,

scramble and grab it. Are these, what are these, Native American, Eskimos, Inuit? Yeah, like a subset of Inuit, I think. Like Ipinui, something like that. Pueene. Do they speak English? Yeah.

Oh, cool. And in Anchorage, they're like, hey, it's Ucviagvik. It's not Barrow. We're going back to the indigenous term. All right. So I was like, okay. And I was like, it's hard to pronounce Uchweigvik.

So like, I kept saying like, Ekuviy, I'm like, you know, Barrow. And it's Uckviogvik. I'm like, all right, sorry. Get up there. They're taking us on a tour. And he goes, hey, welcome to Uchvijavik. It used to pronounce Barrow.

Honestly, you can say out of the one. Everybody here still calls it Barrow. Okay. And I'm like, oh, wait. I was made to feel like an asshole. Yes. You guys are here and you call it Barrow. Ah.

There's fucking white people everywhere. That's what it is. Getting angry at everybody. Yeah, my buddy grew up in Oklahoma, and he went to an Indian school. That's what they called it, like a school for Indians. Yeah. And they're like Native Americans. And then he moved to New York and everybody's like, whoa, you can't say indie.

You got to say Native American. He's like, I went to the school. I went to the school. Don't tell me. They named it that. Yeah. So, yeah. Honkeys everywhere.

So then what else you get into? So that was about it. Then, you know, we got trucked back. And at least you had some other visitors there, like other tourists there. You'd be like, that was crazy. Holy shit. Where do you go? They're like, don't go to this bar.

I'll fuck your friend. You're like, we already did that. So you get to chat a little bit because this is before TripAdvisor and Google. You just did shit and talk to people. It's a different time. It's a different way to travel. Completely. You're just like, yeah, you just go by word of mouth.

Lonely planet was big. Yes. Otherwise you would have no clue. Holy planet. Wow. Yeah, you'd have to like, I stayed at a hotel once. What's the name of it? Right.

Can I even call them? Yeah, I used to stay at hostels and you'd all like meet in the, common area and you'd be like what do you got what are you up to what's your thing where can i go to that you go to a concert can i get in and you just go with some stranger what what trans bar name can't get in because there's a dick there oh yeah all right all right um keep them coming though okay hey keep them coming keep them coming keep them coming that's a good gay bar keep them so yeah then we just go back and drink and i eat street tacos all night and friends what a fun time great time did you get a hooker no I thought about it and I couldn't

I couldn't it takes some courage I got one in Tijuana Tijuana is better in what way what do you well it just feels like hookery it's like where you go to get a hooker yeah more is like it's dirty and weird and I feel like if you fucked a chick your dick would fall off yeah right obviously we're we always heard that uh yeah but our friend we just go down and I'm with he was like let me fucking without a con. Let me go down on them. What? What?

Down on them? It's the sky. I never got anything. Wow. Yeah. That guy probably never got COVID either. Yeah, maybe. I mean, your immune system,

if you go down on a hook or in Mexico, you go down there, it's super hot. It's like hot out. And then you go there, it's like a bar. Yeah. And maybe that's how it was there too.

It's a bar and the chicks are just there. And there's some old drunk Mexicans. Like, I just want to dance with them. I don't have money for it. Yeah. But that's why we went. He gave me a couple pieces of advice. He goes, you've got to choose carefully.

It's dark in here. To get to the hotel, you've got to walk out next door and then up. You're going to see them in full light. Oh. So look carefully at their faces because you can't unsee what you see up there. Holy hell. Could have bad skin. Yeah, exactly.

Brown. All right. So, yeah, you say, and you go, when you decide that I want that one, you go, how much for a dance? How much for a room? And they will tell you the same amount, $72. 72. Yep. That's high.

How much were they there? I mean, this is like five, you pay five bucks for the room, I think 20 for the hooker. So this was, they broke it down for it. 60 for the hooker. Okay. 11 for the room. Okay. That's 71.

Yeah. And I don't know what percentage of the hooker goes to the pimp or whatever has to pay back to the hotel. But 11 for the room. And $1 for the cleanup guy. That's a tough life right there. It goes room to room. Who's got it worse? The hooker?

Cleaning up John Jizz. Who's got it worse? The hooker? The cleanup after hooker guy. I think the cleanup after hooker guy. I think so, too. You're not even making money. No.

She's getting no money and you go just cleaning giz for a living. That's the 40th guy you fuck. This doesn't matter anymore. No, you go to a happy place. You just get a jizzing your hand too. You have to wring out the mop. Yeah, it's one of those like sleepaway camp mattresses. Yeah.

With nothing on it, though. Just like a sheet, but like it's still that hard plastic. Couldn't get a hard on. It was so hot. I was so nervous. She said, hey, so you're going to pay the 12 right there and you pay 60 to her. He goes, put 80 on the table right away. So that she already knows she's getting tips.

She'll work harder. Good advice. That's good. Maybe she'll bleep his name. Yeah. All right. Or maybe. I'm just giving him a bleep.

All right, fair enough. Give it a bleep. Yeah. Anyway, couldn't get a boner. She tried to get a condom on me with her mouth. And it was like, like, I got like, one third hard. and she was like too much Cervesa and it was like, no, I'm just very nervous.

Yeah, how old were you? 25, 26. No excuse. No excuse back then for that, but it was just so nerve-wracking. And your body was probably telling you like, don't bang this hooker. Don't bang this. It's not like a sexual thing where I'm hooking up with a girl.

I'm like, I'm supposed to be doing this. Yeah. It was very regimented. It was kind of unsexual. Completely. It's almost like a doctor visit. Yeah, except. If you get laid.

I managed just fucking punch it in. All right. Yeah, a little bit. I still did it. Man, that's wild. Welcome to the end, everybody. It's a storytelling show, me and my comedian friends. We're all telling true and really terrible stories.

Into a toddler's face. Wild face sometime. Regretful. Every STD. Horrible. I'm going to fuck you up. An amazing story. We just got started.

I'm going to stop the terrace. You're in trouble. That's a good night. It's going to be a good night. It's going to kill us all. Come about to be fucked. You should be in jail. Hey man, are you okay?

I actually do well. You don't fucking talk to me, okay? I'm the disciple of the Lord. How did I get here? How did this happen? That's a good question. You guys, ready to start the show? Hey guys, today's episode of Yuba Trippin is brought to you by Mudwater.

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at the best price. And then you went back to... Then we drove back to Baton Rouge two days later. Tell all your friends. Told everybody, everything. And our buddy got married six months later, as I said, because he was like,

I'm not fucking gay. I love women. I'm going to marry one. I know. You fucked in the ass. You didn't know. What's your fault? Yeah.

And have you been back to Mexico ever since then? I have. Yeah. I went with the wife. We went to the same place. No. For the honeymoon.

She fucked a dude. She thought it was a man. She thought it was a woman. It turns out to be a dude. Right. So we went to... You think of him goes a honeymoon in Metamoros? That's a cheap fucker right there.

God, could you imagine? Come on, honey. We're going to see a cockfight, a donkey show, a hooker. It's going to be great. If you want a role play, that's a spot. That's funny. That's a spot. Just be a hooker.

Be a hooker at a bar in Metamoros. That's good. I like that. I like, you're like, I'm not going to go down on you, your hooker.

Let, let a few other guys ask how much like dress like a hooker. Let a few guys ask how much. It's like, no, no. And then you're like, hey, how much? Like, maybe.

You're very cute. I could put on some accent. Do you do the role play? I can't, I'm such a cynical cunt. I can't. I'm like, what are we doing?

This is stupid. Yeah, right. You know it's like, this is made up. Yeah. If I have any fetish, it's leaving after. That's my thing.

which they don't women don't like that I mean the role play is being in actual situation being in the I'm just going to come over you're not going to know my name and I'm going to leave I'm like whoa what the fuck yeah yeah I got offered once to do a never ended up doing it I want you to like

the army oh yeah yeah and I was like what I'm agreeing now but like I'll leave keys somewhere coming with a knife women are wild I was like really it's a huge fantasy I want to want to have that

but I don't actually want to have it happen Whoa Judy Gold That is crazy I don't know if I would What if there's a ring camera Yeah I was like well I'm going to need this in writing

Yes I'm going to need this heavy in writing That's very Jewish of you by Yeah I mean this is a very troubling position That's crazy Word galore. Yes.

You need a safe word too. Yeah. Huh? Did you do it? I never made it back to that town while I was single. So it was like I had a girlfriend once when I made it back to that town and then later and then I just didn't make it. And then it's just like I lost touch of her. The knife is, that's so disturbing.

Remembering Sopranos when he was holding a gun to her head? Yeah, Richie Abril. Dejanis. Yeah. That kind of shit. We're like, oh my God. I don't know. Yeah.

By the way, I was watching that on HBO with my parents. That was brutal. because I used to watch the show on HBO. Oh, my God. And that scene came on. My mom's like, Oh, to be in the room with your parents when that...

I mean, I'll watch a mob show with my parents. You should be fine. Maybe a murder. Sure. That's way worse. Way worse. That was dark. She wasn't even hot.

I know. So it was like gross sex with a gun to the head. Yeah. I mean, I came. But still... What's more uncultzable than having a sexy can come on in a movie and your parents are there? Yeah, I know.

Especially an elevated one. It's not just a sexy with, like too attractive people. It was like gross people, gun to the head, on their knees, doggy style. My dad took me to see in the theater as a fish called Wanda. Uh-huh. And I'm like, that's a he hikes movie, I think. Yeah, Kevin Klein.

Yeah, but then he starts fucking the hermaphrodite lady. Whoa. From Halloween, whatever her name is. Oh, oh, Jamie Lee Curtis. Yeah. And then he's taken off her shirt and he goes, oh, yeah. It was so uncomfortable. My pops next to me.

I'm like, I don't want to be here for this. Oh, brutal. Yeah, I've had a few of them. I saw Species in the theater with my friend's mom. That was pretty bad. That movie's all fucking. Natasha Hentres, naked. Beautiful.

I couldn't even enjoy it. She's so hot, but the mom's there. Yeah. So you've been back to Mexico. Yes, yes. And where'd you go in Mexico? Mexico's great because it has these, you know, dark, sad, fucked up pockets like Tijuana and Matamora. But it also has Mexico's sit.

Mexico on the low is like 10 countries. That's true. I mean, the difference between the Wahaka region food and the Sonoran region food, I'm just making that up, is like wildly different. Wildly different. But I would say that you could do the same with the U.S. I mean, Texas is way different than California, which is different than Florida, which is different than Vermont. Yeah. And it's, but it's also based on different indigenous kind of tribes and different traditions there.

Yeah, yeah. But yeah, you're right. You could say that about America. They're all kind of wildly different. I mean, at least we have a right aid in everyone and a McDonald's and a Walmart, but I don't know if they even have that. You go Panama, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Honduras El Salvador, Guatemala, Belize. And then that's in the same amount of space as from Chappas to about here in Mexico. Oh, you're right.

So that could be six more countries if it kept going with those small ones. Plus Baja. Plus Baja is a different thing. Yeah. And then up in Cancun, Mereda and all those places. Whoa. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, the Katrina Pabal is all like, that's all Yucatan-Tanee, right? Now, how does this work? Because Mexico is obviously Hispanic.

That's because it was a bunch of native people, the Aztec, the Inca, the Mayan, and then Spain conquered it. And then why is Jamaica not that far? And Jamaica's so black. So as Nicaragua's pretty black. I think. Got it in the name. I'm going to guess here. Yours are the best when you're hearing a second or two later Oh yeah, yeah

It's a C, not a G, thank God I think it's because The ports for slavery Oh, slavery So they unloaded a bunch of dark Right there as they're waiting to process them So then it becomes You're right

Like Virgin Island is all black Interesting Haiti's super black Yeah And then it's like they got off there And they kind of just stayed there Yeah Yeah I wonder

There's a part of a Ecuador that's all black. It's here that's the northern, like this area, it's in Colombia, and it's because the slave ship sank right there just off the coast, they all swam to freedom. Whoa. Because in Ecuador, we don't own you, so you're free. You tell me black people swam? All right.

Maybe you're washed up on the rocks. Okay. Yeah, in that area. And so it's very, that's the only place where there's pretty much a large population of black people there. Also, and unrelated, that's. where the violence is. But it's all from the Colombian, the fart people coming over the border there.

Oh, okay, okay. But, yeah, that's the dangerous part of Ecuador. Damn. Well, Brazil is like, you see a Brazilian, it's like coffee. They go from. Yeah, the range. Black to mocha to latte. And then back again.

Yeah. Yeah, put more milk in it. It's like, well, that's the beach down there. Right. Well, I think it may be because you got some slavery stuff. Then you got the Latino, but then you got some Nazi in there. Got some Nazi. You get some black with blue eyes.

Or is that our... Was that Argentina? I think it's all over there. But I think Argentina, too. Yeah, those Nazis got the fuck out. They really love Argentina. Arlington is cool. It's almost too nice.

It was like, they say it's the New York of South America. They think they're upscale too. They think they're better than everybody. They do the TH on the D's, you know? They invented the, not salsa, the, Tango. Oh, really? They invented Tango in Argentina. Okay, so you want back to Mexico

Back to Mexico And where'd you go? With the wife And we went to Mexico City As you do So cool What a place It is the

First of all It's New York vibes But L.A. weather It's in the mountains It's so pretty But it's got some stank on it You know what I mean? Like it's got these beautiful

lush neighborhoods I can't even think of the neighborhoods Now Romanorte Roma was one It's two like white neighbors. Yeah.

Norte and La Cadesa. Condessa. Nailed it. Damn, long-term memory, short-term gone. Yeah. So, yeah, we stayed in Condessa, and then we just walked to Rome every night, have a great meal, go to a nightclub, go to a bar, go to a park all day. Food situation.

Amazing. Food was great. I mean, you could just get anything you wanted. They have all these restaurants, but everything was fresh and it was cheaper, and it was damn good. The restaurants there are top-notch. Did you go to Pujol? Who?

Pujole. The one like Michelin. Poo hole, great gay bar. Poo hole. Let me eat the poo hole. All right. Come to the back. But what I always loved about it was the street tacos are wild.

Yeah, very good. And then they have upscale restaurants at the same time. So you get that lunch at the street taco, but they have lines there. You'd go best restaurant in Mexico City And they'd go this street taco place And I was like, okay So you'd wait in line And it was cheap and good

And uh You'd wait in line because the word was out But also not that long I'll send you all these photos We did this These canals is a big thing Oh, you heard about this If you Google it's crazy

You go on these canals It's cheap and it takes like six hours Or five hours And you go all over up down Left right And they have guys who swim up on a little mini boat and they sell you beer.

So you're dealing with a guy on another boat and you're... There it is! That's them! They all bump into each other. What? And there's people partying on one. There's a family on another. There's a like a bachelor party on another

and you just go all day and you drink and you can eat on them. Like a guy comes up with a grill, he's got a grill on his little boat and you're like, give me two tacos or two pieces of chicken. Wait, wait, wait, so he comes up on a boat and just like sells him right there? Sells it right there.

He sells it right there. He's like a... See, these are the regular boats. But they don't... I don't know if they have a... See, that guy brought his own food. That's a taco boat. That's a taco boat.

Yeah, so they bump your boat next to their boat and you just give the guy a five and he gives you 10 tacos. Wow. It's a great. You would love it. It's amazing. And there's all these fun, weird statues along the way.

It's just canals like this? Yeah. And you do it all day. You got a boom box on there. You booze? You booze? You eat. And it's like,

regular banks like this? It's not like the Amsterdam canals. No, no. It's real naturey. And you're out there. You're out there in the wild. There's some broken boats and all kinds of... Wow. There's tons of ladies out there. Yeah. It's a great time. Wow. Where was that? I remember being like way, way, like too far away to get to. It was a ride. You have to jump in a car. It's probably like a 50 minute drive. Yeah. So it's like that's your day. That's your day. But totally worth it and you got to do it. If you go to Mexico for five days, that's got to be one of your days.

Lunatas and, okay, well. We skip the pyramids to do that. Really? Yeah, the pyramid was the whole thing, so. Yeah, I mean, sometimes you've got to make a decision. Yeah, because the pyramid you go and then you come back. This is like you go, you spend the day and come back. It's actually experiential.

Yes. We're having a good time. We're doing something. Exactly. There's also, when you're going traveling, I don't know how you do it. You're kind of new to it still. Yeah. To really open up and like take your time.

Yeah, I'm not good at it. Yeah. Well, you're getting better at it. My wife has helped me with it. Yeah, for sure. Having a chick with you, like, researching stuff to do. Yes. But you can get caught up in, there's too many things I want to do, and so you're like rush, rush, rush.

Right. And at some point you've got like, let's lose two out of these seven and actually walk around. Yes. Actually enjoy our time. Embrace the detour, we call it. Yeah. Just walk somewhere and you'll find something new. Because if you're Googling all day, everything's a little too regimented.

Yeah. But sometimes you just randomly find a thing. That was me. There it is. See, there's a band on one. There's a guy with the big stick. He's pushing you around. And they just come up to you.

Wow. Look at H. Foley there. Yeah. H. Foley, but it's spelled with a J. H. H. H. H. Fully. Yeah.

Wow. This is a lot. When I went there was 8 million boats, he was just bumping into people constantly. So that looks a little more relaxed. Oh, interesting. Damn, that's bomb. I got to do that.

You got to do it. You would love it. Yeah. You can go out. out and get a little sun or go hide under the canopy thing. And you have a canopy there? Wow. And they have like these guys playing? Yeah, that's mariachi.

Some boats just a mariachi. Then they're like, they pass a bucket to you and you throw them a fiver. And just like hang out here for one song and then move on. Exactly. And they're out there all damn day. Wow. It's a, it's pretty amazing. And there's hundreds and hundreds of those boats.

Wow. That's very, very cool. Lunatas, Etra, Canals of Watch. When WestJette first took flight in 1996, the vibes were a bit different. People thought denim on denim was peak fashion, inline skates were everywhere, and two out of three women rocked the Rachel. While those things stayed in the 90s, one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when WestJet welcomes you on board.

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Get Iexel now. Listeners can get an exclusive 20% off Iexel membership when they sign up today at Iexel.com forward slash today. Visit Ixl.com forward slash today to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. Yeah, so good time, got to do it. We also went to the Soho House. Wait, there's a Soho House? There is.

Mexico City is like a pop in place. It's got a bad name from Mexico. It should be like a different thing. If it was Germany City, it wouldn't be nearly as cool as Berlin. That's true. Good point. It's just Spetzel all day? And you're like, no, no.

Yeah, right. Mexico City is so, it was so like artsy to me. Yeah, very artsy, very lush, big plants. Good weather. The weather's incredible. and there's just no rules there which hurts them what do you mean meaning like they have no regulations

on the homes so there's a lot of my old joke was I did two shows there that's why we went but I did two shows but there's no regulations on the home so you like my joke was a lot of dilapidated buildings ironically you guys could use some Mexicans like to fix all this shit

and it's it's just a lot of like cement shit crumbling and a lot of abduction There's posters everywhere. It looks like after at October 6th of just like, we're missing kid, find my kid, where's my kid? All over the walls. Whoa.

Yeah. So there's still a lot of shady shits and cartel stuff cooking. Sometimes I wonder if when they're like, when there are places where like, hey, stop abuse towards women, signs everywhere or stop abductions. I wonder if it is a ton of them or if it's just they have a lower tolerance for it than we have. Where it's like, same amount, but we just won't stand for it. So we got to put up signs. I'd be like stop this now. Three women got murdered last year.

We got to stop this. We're like, oh, that's a fucking Tuesday in New York. Right. That's a good point. I don't know. But they were everywhere. Yeah. But it's to the point where, like, if you saw a hundred lost cat, you just get overwhelmed

to go, fuck that. I can't find a cat. I can't deal with it. That's how it feels with the kids. It's kind of like outside Mexico City. So all these blues is kind of stuff I probably was at. And this is down where those canals are. It's far.

It's a drive. So what else do you get into? Oh, well, let's see. Did the shows? Did the shows? How were the shows? Shows were incredible. English speakers?

A little of both, but they're just so excited. They love pods. So they're just the hottest crowd. I had this guy Carlos open for me. He's like a little local celebrity, long hair, glasses. I forgot his last name. But he was a hot. So he opened and he goes, for you, I barely speak English, but I'll do my set in English.

And I was like, thanks. So he worked on it, brought the English, killed. I went out there and they're just like, ah! They're so amped. I couldn't believe you're there. I don't even know if they know what I'm saying. I'll be like, so I was at Target, and I'm like, you don't have Target, but they would still go nuts. They were just the greatest crowd because I don't think people play there.

It is crazy that with the pods are like, we know what Target is now. Yeah, I know. I know. I'm passing enough times. We get it by context, what it is. Yeah. Do you think does people just Googling stuff when we talk? Like when Rogan is doing an episode and the guy in Australia is like, what the hell is?

Yeah, like, I don't get it by, let me pause, look that up. Like, oh, it's a store. I bet they're doing that. I bet. Yeah. Yeah, like, what the hell's a laugh factory? Oh, it's a comedy club. I had a joke that just wasn't working in my first, like, three stops of a European run.

Yeah. And then somebody, it was about alt-oids. It wasn't about al-aids, but it included alt-oids. And then somebody was like, I'm an American and like, I forget where it was. Brussels maybe. He goes, hey, just so you know. And I'm like, why is this joke suddenly not working? Yeah.

We don't have al-toids here. Oh. And I just had to change it to mince. And then it was like, back to boom. That's funny because Al Toy, if you don't know what that is, what the fuck's that mean? Is that a guy?

Are you calling someone something? Yeah. So yeah, that's a good one. I had that a few, I had PayPal. And they just don't do it. They don't do PayPal. Yeah, I asked my brother,

who lives in another country that kind of Vamo, he was like, fucking Americans. You think everyone's on Vamo? I'm like, yeah, I did that. Yeah, I assumed. We all are. So, yeah. There's a million things like that.

You always have to check. Do you guys have Uber here? What do you call? Uber, yeah. So, but they, they were on board. The crowds were great. I did two shows. I did two in Guadalajara after that. Where's that?

The border is wild. No. No, I felt further in. It was a flight. I had to take a flight there. But Guadalajaro, the crazy thing about that is I did a gig, two shows at a small rock club. Wow. And I was there alone.

The lady didn't come. So I just wandered the streets and ate tacos and drank and like just watched everybody, the little people watching. This guy runs up to me, white guy. And he goes, I was at your show. I'm a big fan. I left L.A. I'm from L.A.

L.A. got too quefy and gay. So I moved to Guadalajara, not knowing the language. I opened a bar. What? And now I sell drugs and run a bar and get laid by all these Mexican gals and I live in like a giant skyrise

and it's the best decision I ever made. Oh, it's more up there. Wow, that's crazy when people call it quits. Yes. I'm done with the struggle. I finally said I'm out. He's like L.A.'s getting weird. It's homeless.

It's, you know, whatever. True, not untrue. And he got the fuck out and started his own, a new life in Guadalajara and he loves it. He's like, I went to Mexico City. It was too American. Why do I think Guarra was in the border? I should go there then, huh?

You should definitely go there. So what did you get into there? Well, there I just drank at this guy's bar. So I drank for free and he had a pizza shop in the bar. So I ate some pizza and drank there and hung out with him. How was the pizza? Yeah, fine. It's pizza.

It's not as good as the Mexican pizza at Taco Bell, ironically. But it was still pretty good. And then he's like, I'm going to this party and I'm going to do a bunch of drugs. And he's like a hot shit in the town now because he owns his bar and he knows everybody. And I was like, I'm going home. I went back to the hotel. But he text me all night like, you're missing out. There's supermodels here.

I'm like, I'm good. He was all cooked up. Yeah, yeah. That thing of like, I got chicks coming. Yeah. I don't want. What are you going to present women to me? Exactly.

Exactly. The idea that these high roller kind of guys have that you think what they think is cool is cool. It's like you're just so far off, babe Exactly It's like the guy's like You gotta see my snake I mean even 20 years ago Where it's like

I just want to go to their bar Where there might be people Who were at my show Yeah And then I'll maybe Hit on a girl that way Right Right

You're gonna present a strip I don't know to talk to a stripper I know I know The whole thing You queft me out So I bailed But cool city It's got even more stank on it

Really In Mexico City Also street tacos and stuff there? Everything. Everything. That's a clean version. It didn't look like that when I was there. Yeah, I got to clean it up for the picks.

Yeah. A lot of shit going on. A lot of cool architecture. A lot of statues, a lot of fun. What time of year were you there? It was probably like last February. And it was hot. Did you go to this in Mexico City?

I did. Oh, that we did that too. How'd you know? Well, I'm asking. Okay. I didn't know. Nacho Libre? What do you call that?

Lucha Libre. Lucha Libre. You know what that means? Hold on. Lucha is moon? Lucha's fighter. Fighter. Lucha Dora is a fighter. Libre is...

You got this one. Horse? What's a Libra? Sort of. Liberator. Liberator. Freedom fighter. Ah, Freedom Fighter.

I would never have gotten that. You want a beer? I feel like a Modelo right now. Sure. By the way, you know, you put a lime in the Modelo. That's an American thing. I did that in Mexico, and I pushed it through like you do. Yeah.

And the guy goes, we put limes on our beer to keep flies out. So we keep it at the top, like a little cap. And we are dumb cracker asses pushed it through because we thought that's what you did, but we totally made that up. Wow. So, fun fact. To clear the, to clear the fucking, which one do you want? What is the other one?

I got liquor, too. Oh, I'll do the Modell. What are you going to have? Is that a delirium? It's delirium. Whoa. That shit's strong. It's my favorite beer in the world for a long time.

It's great beer, but it's a lot of proof. Maybe I should have a tequila or something Mexican. Oh, yeah. You guys gave me! What? Oh! I didn't know you took it. Hey, it looks good.

O'Neill, I think, finished off the tequila. Well, you want to split this? I feel bad. That looks like a blanco. What hell is this? This is, uh, it looks like vodka. Yeah, it's from Russia. It's vodka.

All right, well, okay. I'm gonna have some of this. I'm gonna have some Mamawana. What's that? It's a fucking Dominican Republic drinks. Got a bunch of twigs and shit today. You want to try some?

Sure, that's Latin. Yeah, yeah, it's close. Lucha Libre. Lucha Libre is the number one thing I tell people to go do. Yeah, it was fun. Mexico City. It's so much fun. Super fun. We saw the midget

wrestling, which was a highlight. God, it's fun. Yeah, and the whole city is out. Like, there's a parade on the way there, and then outside of the arena is the fucking like a, it's like Mardi Gras. And it's cheap? Super cheap. The big beers.

Great time. Just watch people get thrown around. There's like the white guy and the black guy and the Mexican guy and the characters. Yeah, they had a girl one. Is that how our wrestling started? It's got to be. It's got to be, right? Because it's so reminiscent.

Yeah, because it's so over the top. Like, they're throwing each other and it's fake and silly. But, boy, it's a good time. And you get into it. You start going, yeah, kill them. Fuck you. What the hell is this? It's got a bunch of anise and twigs and branches.

It'll make your bono hard. It's like a liqueur. Yeah, honey, red wine, and some other shit. Whoa. Hachimachi. Oh, it's got some rum in there, too, I think. It's porous too Twiggy

Twiggy You can't bring this back full But you can bring just the twigs back Empty and then make it Oh really? Yeah but they'll sell on the streets It's like big fucking jugs Just like repurposed jugs

Damn Yeah it says it's got rum honey It does The whole Really? The whole ingredients on the back A Tirid del Marengay Raisins

Let it sit for a week than drinking a short cup. That's fun. Oh, we're doing it. Okay. Tell me about Lucha Libre. Lucha Libre, I'll tell you. It was great.

We put the masks on. You got the mask, right? I definitely got the mask. And me and the wife put them on and you get drunk and watch midgets. You just find what you go out there. It's outside, right? So all the huts set up to sell masks.

Yes. And then, by the way, tip, get the masks outside. Yeah, oh yeah. Inside, they're like five times more and they're the same mask. They're all made in Mexico. 100%.

And you just find up a, one that you like the look of and then you're like yeah sick that yeah and they're like uh two dollars like how about one whatever it's more than that but like not much more no no and you get you get on you sit on

bleachers it's all very bare bones in there but there's like little kids in there too little local kids on their dad's shoulders going kill it right right and they have favorites like one guy would walk out everybody go boo and another guy would walk out they go yeah we like that guy yeah and uh yeah it's just so fun and so interactive and like a guy gets thrown out and kind of like falls in your front row of your

bleacher area and you got to push him back in yeah it's great oh my god it's so fun everyone screaming what well at first you're kind of like what is this is so silly but then you let yourself get into it and it becomes great yeah that's all wrestling like except the fakeness don't even think about it otherwise it won't be good exactly it's same with tits if you're like leaves are weird just get in there yeah stripper like you only hear because you have to do this for money I'm like dude Let her say she likes you. Exactly. Just let yourself believe it.

So super fun. I mean, Mexico just has so many fun activities that they do. And then you could do a, we went to a Chomsky. What was that, Trotsky? Trotsky. We went to Trotsky's house. Good friends with, I never went there. How was that?

That was really cool. I mean, just reading, you read all the little plaque hurts written in his house and you're like, man, this guy went through hell getting here. He was a big communist, you know, kicked out of whatever. That's it. House Museum. Wow. Yeah.

Yeah, big comie. He was big friends with who's the female artist. Oh, Frida. Frida. Frida, Calo. Went to Frida's house too. That's one of my favorite places in the world. Very cool house.

I was with a bunch of friends when I was there the first time. Went to the Frida tour and then there's this courtyard outside. It's all painted in this type of like purple blue that's kind of only, I call it Frida blue. I don't know. You know what the color is? Yeah, it really pops. Yeah, it's like it's all over there too. Yeah.

I can't really find it here. No, no. Even when I'm in the paint stores And I try to show them And like Uh Yeah pull it up if you can It's made of like berries or something

That are only Only made there Oh really? I'm just assuming Because we can't get it here But the house is crazy It shows her bed Because she was crippled

Or whatever It's this There it is Yeah A lot of primary colors Yeah it's this color purple And it's like Purpleish blue

I don't That's her old house And the neighborhood Is sick Like the neighborhood's really pretty and cute and residential. I remember going and doing the whole thing. It's interesting.

Again, the bed ridden bed and everything like that. So they built her a bed where she couldn't get off her back. So they built her a bed that had a canvas holder upside down so she could still paint like that. What a commitment. I know, never stopped. What a commitment. Husband beat the hell out of her.

Fucked her sister. Is that right? Yeah, started cheating her with her sister for a while. It was a different time. But also he's like, yeah, you're fucking bedridden, bitch. I want to get some. that's a good point it's like come on

I'm not an asshole husband a well-respected artist but I forget his name Diego Diego Rivera Diego Rivera he did a 30 rock yeah yeah he did the walls

and 30 rock and they didn't like it or something but he was like yeah there was something with it he put in some like some like counterculture stuff yeah

they go we don't want that's all we want to go well I'm a fucking artist yeah so that's what you're getting that's true we want artists to be good but we also don't want them

to you know fuck up or go outside the lines I remember thing all the stuff about Frida and then like she's very interesting and like and like probably their best I don't know highest rated artists of it easily easily and and she's herself as a as a canvas pretty much yeah you know she like with the big eyebrows and all the yeah outfits she had like this is my I am my canvas 100% but then very interesting and then I went out to the courtyard that she built to be creative to walk around in these little like pads in her courtyard and I was just like I wasn't trying to

be hokey but I was just like I was waiting for my friends to go to the bathroom and then I had a notebook so I started writing and then like I were going to the next thing I was like guys I got to be honest with you it's flowing out of me in here whoa is that right yeah I'm gonna catch up with you you wrote the whole juice special in that pretty much yeah it's great it was just like I can't I'm just like it's working I get it wow that's the serenness of it and the way I don't know but it was just like I nailed it lady it was conducive yeah wow I guess she We got to get a court. We should do a comedy courtyard.

Somewhere we can go and all, like, I'm getting a little writer's block. Yeah. Let me hit the courtyard. Just go be in this place where, like, you got to drop yourself under the door. Yes. Come get it. See another comic there. You can bounce some bits.

We'll put a bar in there. Yeah, or meet up in the middle if you want to do bounce bits ideas. Stay off in your corners. But if you're the middle, that's where people come together. Like, hey, what, you're here? That's good. What do you get? Yeah.

A comedy. I mean, it's basically rehab. I think that's what rehab is for comics I should have I would be a fun rehab If I got to go Let me go with a couple of comics I know Right

Right That would be all right I'm sure Malaney If he had a couple of comics in there He would have a better time I had to pick up Bobby Lee Out of rehab once Jesus

He called me he was like Get me out of here Really? I had to pick him up He had to climb a wall And pick him up on the highway On the 5 or the 4 o 5 What?

He would be waiting at this point But I'm going to climb a wall And get out Can you come down? I'm like yeah okay Drove an hour and a half To a pre-smartphone

location he's describing on the 405 Malibu or something this was like most of the way to San Diego wow and then it was like yeah it was like I think it's around here I see a fucking fat short

yeah and I pulled over I was get in get in hurry up somebody's gonna fucking nail me get in get in and he just drove off whoa hurry hurry hurry drive drive drive what a friend how does he never talks about this yeah I don't know

I'm sure he's mentioned it okay okay Wow, you're a good guy. Is this before the fist fight or after the fist? Before the fist fight. Okay. Yeah, before. Then he backstabbed.

Then he backstab. That's even worse. It was like, buddy, I was your friend. Why are you backstack? He should have called that rehab. I've been like, hey, I got your fucking China man over here. He should drum right back to the entrance. You want to put shackles on this one.

That guy rules. That guy's one of the best guys of all time, to be honest. Bobby's the man. Yeah. He's not even Chinese, by the way. I was joking. It's Korean. So that's cool.

Frida Kahlo. Did you do that museum, I told you? you about? No. Museum of Broken Relationships? I think we did. Yes, I told it, I was on the fence, but May was like, we got to do that. It's the most underrated, like, it's a nothing thing. It's not a tourist stop. Well, it kind of

fucked me up because it was just the, it's all just so sad and dark and you start reading shit, and you're like, God damn. And then you look at your wife, you're like, we've had fights. Look at this shit. It's like two maybe more story remnants of relationships.

And it's either boyfriend girlfriend, wife's husband, or mother father. Yeah. And some of it's like, I remember one of them, and it says a little story next to it. Yeah. So one of them was like, I saved a viral, vial of my tears after we broke up, after you dumped me. I was going to give it to you to try to throw it in your face. And then three years passed, and I just never ran into you.

And I think you moved towns. And I was like, what am I going to do with this vial of tears? So I donated it to the museum. And I think about you once in a while. One of them was like, you're my dad. You got cancer when I was nine. and you gave me this teddy bear, and I just the one thing I had to remember you by. Yeah, it was too heavy for me.

Some of it was funny. Some of it was very real dark. Very dark. It, like, moved me. And it was one of those why I was just passing by, and I go, what's this one? Yeah. I don't even know the name of it. That's not the name of it.

It was something I had to look up every time. And I go, how much? They go $2 to get in. I was like, hey, guys, let's do this. It's a brilliant idea for a museum. And it's just like all these things, a Lego piece. from a child who got hit by a car Yeah

And you're like What? You know what it reminded me You've been to the Mooder Museum in Philly That was cool Or Mutter It's like my mutter Oddities?

Yeah It's a guy with a skull With a nail in it And they go This guy was on a construction site And they got hit with a nail And went through his brain So they have the skull

With a nail in it Just in a case God damn There was the one guy who was so fat He died And he turned to soap What? Because that's how you make soap

is from fat. His body turned into soap. Crazy. Go to the mutter museum in Philly. It's a little pricey. I remember it was like 50 bucks to get in. Yeah, the museum of Broken Promises or whatever was not pricey at all.

That was like three bucks. That's why I try to tell people to go to. I'm like, if you don't like it, just move on. Yeah, yeah. It's in the part of town that you should be in, you know? Uh-huh. And it's just like, just go. Just go.

Yeah, if you don't like it, move on. Is that the mutter? It's the mutter. Yeah. College of Physicians. There we go. There's the oddities. There we go.

Yeah, a lot of that. A lot of bodies and jars. Bodies and jars from aldehyde. They show a miscarriage. They show a fetus. That one grossed me out in a different way than the broken promises one, broken relationships. This is like, it got me the same thing. I'm like, guys, I got to go outside.

Yeah. There's a hooker museum in Amsterdam that I went to. And that's pretty sad, too. Because it's like, I didn't want to be a hooker. I was broke. I had to do it. I was kidnapped from my home as a Ukrainian, whatever girl. Oh, brutal.

Iron lung, wow. Mexico, cheap, expensive? Cheap. Even Mexico City. Mexico City's cheaper, but it's not like crazy. Guadalajara is crazy. Really? Yeah.

I would say that with Mexico City, it's not one of those that it's not going to be those like rural Thailand things. We're like, I got a whole meal and wine for $3. It's not that. But like, especially coming from New York. Yeah. Where that place that gave our poo was like, it's a Michelin, like, five-star, whatever, and it's like, it was like $75.

Right. It should have been $300. Yeah, easily. And so it's like, you know, not nothing, but like, yeah, bargain. Not bad, but the wife got the parasite. She got it two days left and it wrecked her. I was eating everything. Lettuce and drinking water.

I was doing the ice. Are you crazy? You're eating lettuce? Yeah, I had cocktails. They're like, watch out of the ice. which is what I tell people here. But they're like, watch out for the ice. And I'm like, ah, it's fine.

I was chugging drinks, having a great time. Then when you're hung over, you're like, let me get a little bit of tap water. I'm parched. She watched out for everything, didn't touch a thing, and she got the parasite. She didn't even fuck up? She didn't fuck up.

And she got it, but she got it bad. I mean, she could knock it off the toilet. She was shitting yellow goo. What? I had to go to the hospital and get her pills. It was crazy. I mean, she was, she was like Frida.

She was bedridden. She was painting upside down. She had a unibrow. It was crazy. And she looked rough and she's like, she lost a bunch of weight and she was miserable. There's nothing you can do too. No.

It's like you're just going to have to wait this out, take whatever pill that your travel doctor gave you, but you're just going to have to deal with it. And she was like, I think I'm better. I think I'm better. And we'd go out and she'd be like, oh God. So she couldn't go more than 10 feet without shit. Yeah, you get some waves.

You're like, okay. So you get better. And then you're like, you breathe a wrong smell. And you're like back. Yeah. It was bad. Sometimes I think about like, I hate saying that word, but like, whatever, cancellations. Uh-huh.

And you're like, it's unfair. It's unfair. But it's like I was about to do a special. I was, I had a show. But imagine you're about to do a special and you get food poisoning. You'll have to just cancel it. You have to. You couldn't do an hour.

No. You couldn't do 20 minutes. So it's like, and you wouldn't be good anyway. And you're like, that's not fair. I put all this money. into it and you're like I know it's not fair but it's just something that happened it happened and it happens all I went to the doctor

and he was like parasite I was like yeah like I walked in white guy and he knew exactly he's like take this and it cured her in like a day but what was it do you remember I have it at the house it's called the Spanish word for diarrhea and that's what it says right on the box

there's a red box it's at my house still just in case it happens again I want that box near me yeah but but what's this it's diarrhea it's very similar let's see special diarrhea okay pastia

tableta no no no no that's a pill oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah weird oh you got pill in there yeah I think it's diarrhea without the H so there you go oh

so you got it there I went to a pharmacy and I got it in Barcelona late at night once and I had it and I was like I got it where's a 24 hour one I mean You think you're going to die. Yes. Oh, you had it. I've had it a bunch of times.

Whoa. Myanmar, Barcelona. Do you know what did it? In Myanmar, I narrowed it down to one of like seven things. I was smoking. They had these rolled, like shitty, like beady, almost cigarettes, like Indian ones. But like they just have them there. And I was like, you know what?

I've seen the local smoke those. I went to a market. I was like, give me three of those. And they go, no, we don't sell three. And I was like, well, I only want to smoke one and give one to a friend. and maybe have one more if I like it. It comes and packs at $200. I'm like, no, I don't want $200.

I'm like, well, it's $3 for $200. I'm like, oh, okay. Yeah, right. But then I'm smoking them all. They have them. So possibly that, possibly this meal I ate where it was like only $3, but it was a full meal, but I'm like, there's no way that could be a full meal if it's only $3. My Jew brain wouldn't process.

So I was like ordered another meal. Then I had before that I had like 12 quail eggs. Oh, that's got to be it. It's supposed to have two, maybe. That's got to be it. Yeah. and maybe any sort of lettuce or anything. Yeah.

No water, though. Could have been brushing my teeth too. So I don't know, but that was that Barcelona, I don't know what did it. I had it in Ecuador too from drinking the water for sure. Damn. Don't you find that so challenging though? Because you're hungover. You're just laying in bed and you're like, I got a sink right here.

Or I got to go out to a five block walk to the 7-Eleven by eight jugs of water, bring it all back. I love tap water. I mean, that's the problem. You live in New York where it's totally accessible. Yeah. It's totally doable. So now you've got to lug water. You're like an African lady.

I got it on my head, you know? Yeah. It does suck. You just like, you can't keep the pill down. Right. Zithormison maybe or something like that. Yes. I don't know.

But like, and you're just like, I need this pill. I need it desperately. I'm barfing. And you're like, uh, he's like shivering and shitting and barfing. All those things. She was bad.

I had once in Vietnam where I was, I saw some. oysters or clams or whatever out. They were out on the street and they're like, we'll cook these up. And I saw them cooked. And I saw where they were stored outside just in a box, just warm. Whoa.

And I'm like, damn, those look good. And I'm like, this is. That's what's going to do it. This is what's going to do. It's obvious. And I was like, I'm chancing it. Wow. I wanted the experience.

And? Coast free. Okay, great. Got off with it. Thank God. Because you would have hated yourself if that, did it? That's the problem, too. There's moments where you do get away with it, and that makes you complacent about other times.

Exactly. Just a little piece of lettuce. No lettuce. Fuck. The one thing you never think about in America. I know. It's kind of like when you drink your face off, like we did on Protect Our Parks where you passed out on the episode. Don't remember that?

Well, then, you know, you're laying on the floor. I have photos of it. And then the next day you go, oh, my God, I want to kill myself. I feel horrible. I'm never drinking again. And then two days go by and you're like, I'll have a drink. Because you feel better. It does help you.

the hair of the dog That's true There's no hair The puke though No no There's no like Let me have some more fucking

shitty street tacos To get over this fucking disease Yeah I'll eat more quail legs To get over this Right Right

Yeah that's true I'm done with those forever That's a good point But she was wreck She couldn't even walk What do in those situations I stayed with her And I was trying to help her

But eventually she was like Get out of here Yeah it's embarrassing Just go I don't just seeing me in the state And there's nothing you're gonna do And you're like Feel bad

But also I'm always torn this is I want to help you, but also I'm on vacation here. Yeah. So I kind of do want you to tell me I'm fine. That was a little of that, yeah. Or can I go to the pharmacy for you? I did that. And then I'm out.

That was exciting. I got a beer on the way. You find one one block away. I'm like, I had to go one across town. Right. I did pass seven taco places apparently. Yeah. I didn't have anything.

You know, like wiping a fucking tortilla off your face. She also got Roto in another trip. You ever had Roto? I don't know if I'm saying it right. List just had it. What? It's you just can't stop leaking, your mouth, your butthole, and it's not food, it's just something you catch. There you go.

Robdomiolysis, a serious conditions where damaged muscle tissues release its contents into the bloodstreams. I don't know. I don't think it's a disease. It's a virus. Roto virus. Download. Oh, rotovirus. Not disease.

Everybody just calls it roto. Okay. Fuck, I all agree. Cause a diarrhea before development of a vaccine. Most children have been infected with the virus by age five. Yeah. You can just get it. It starts within two days of exposure to the virus.

Early symptoms are fever and vomiting, followed by three to seven days of watery diarrhea. The infection can cause abdominal pain as well. In healthy adults, oh my God. Dude, this is the kind of shit that you say that I can just feel people at home going, yeah, right, I'm never going to travel. I know. I'm not doing that. But these are outlier things. You got to travel.

Liss got this here. He got it here. She got it in Boston. Yeah. So there you go. Everybody just goes for the racism, but you can get a rotovirus as well. Yeah, that's true. She got it.

We got on a flight to Portland and it hit her on the flight, which is like a fucking six-hour flight. And she was just like dying on the plane. It was brutal. And then we got there. I just had to put her in a bed. And then I went and did comedy shows and just came back, checked on her, did shows, came back, checked on her.

And then she felt better and we had to leave. When I was, I don't know, had it in Myanmar, the whatever does whatever I was barfing and shitting we're in a small town like a non like it just a stop through town nobody white there it's just disgusting hotel we're sharing two to a room and I'm shivering the whole time like then I keep getting up to shit and bark but it was those shit squat toilets yeah just like the like the the footholes in the side of a hole oh yeah you go to shit for diarrhea you shit a little bit they're like oh it's barf too and you're like I got put my knee on the floor where everybody's pissed yeah and put my face right in

to it so I can bar. It was just like, it was so bad. That's brutal. Isn't it wild when you're yakking like that? You kind of just give in. You give in. You would never put your face on a toilet seat,

but when you have food poisoning, you're like, oh, it's so cold, it feels good. Yeah. You know, your standards just drop. I wouldn't, if I'm walking the streets of New York and I drop a quarter,

I'm like, I don't want to pick that up because I'm going to have to touch the sidewalk. Yeah. And then when you're drunk, you're like, I'll barf and lay with my face on it. On the puke. Totally fine. Totally fine.

I meant on the sidewalk, but yeah. Oh, okay. We're like, I'm good here. Yeah. Like, are you crazy? I know. I had food posting once. I just got in the tub because I was leaking everywhere, just out of my asshole, out of my mouth.

So I just got in the tub and I remember just kind of laying in it. Laying in my own filth, but you don't care because you're just like, I'm in so much pain and misery. I don't give a shit what I'm laying in. Ugh. Yeah, boy, this took a sick turn. Why did you go to Guadalajara without the chick? I went to Mexico, six. The city came back, went to Guadalajara like six months later.

Oh, okay. I didn't go from there. But I had to connect, when I went to Guadalajara, I had to connect to Mexico City and then get another flight. Can I tell you I'm loving the way Americans are now going to these comedians, to these underrepresented comedy cities? Oh, yeah. No one that I know since I've been doing comedy for 70 years has gone to Guadalajara.

I don't go anywhere. A Mexican comics who went to Mexico City. and only a few. Yeah. Well, the cool thing about the Mexico gigs is I went to Mexico with the wife, and I kept getting recognized. So I called my agent. I said, set up a show here.

I could sell out here. And we did. And then I got a bunch of messages. I saw you were in Mexico City. I live in Guadalajara. Come here. So I hit the agent again. I said, let's go to Guadalajara.

How big a room? I did two in Guadalajara and like a 300-seater. Okay. Let me ask you a question. I think we're on the same page on this stuff The battle between money and experience In our own brains I'll take a hit easily

Because it's such a fun time Yeah And obviously you play bigger than the 300 cedars Of course But you're in a place And it's gonna take you to place And it's all tax deductible If you do that 300 cedar

Yes So you're paying two thirds of the price For the vacation And they get your flight and hotel And it's also a weird experience Just doing stand-up for those people Yes Because I want to see their influence

I was in Romania I did a joke about bringing back the word retarded. And I say it's different than the N word and the F word for blacks and gays. And I had a woman in the front raise her hand. I was like, uh, what? What's the F word? Oh, that's great. And I go, well, do you know what the N word is?

She goes, yeah, for black people. They don't say that. I'm like, yeah, right. So F words for gay people. And she goes, oh, why don't you just say that? And I was like, you know what to say it? And she goes, yeah, and she just said it. And there was no like, hey.

Right. It was just nothing. And I was like, oh, so from where I'm from, we're not allowed to say that word. And she goes, why? I'm like, different culture, lady. That's great. Yeah, but it's like I love feeling that from an audience. Yeah, of course.

And getting what you laugh at, what you don't. All my biggest clips online or whatever have all been me in Mexico, me in London, me in Iceland, me in Belfast. Because I'm like, what's up with this? And they yell shit out. You go with it. And it's cool to see, that would have been a great clip, the lady going, what's the F word? That's gold. Yeah.

But those are my biggest clips because it's a fish out of water. Right, right. People love that shit. I'm going to come to this out as an outsider. Yeah. I'm going to be me in your town. And it's kind of like when Yakoff, Shmirov came here. You know, we were like, we love this guy.

What's so weird. Russia. Russia's different than this. Yeah. What a terrible accent. I'll do this thing when I won't read the news at all. So sometimes I just won't want to do my material. And I'll just go to like the stand or the cell.

I'm like, tell me what's in the news. Yeah. Like what I mean? Like, what I mean? Like, I literally don't read it. I don't know what's going on and someone will be like

someone who's like there's a war in India I'm like no when like yesterday I'm like oh really like I don't read it so I don't know yeah and so then I riff on something I have no emotional connection with and I really don't even know the story so I'll take like what is it over this

like are you an idiot I don't know anything yeah so you're just in the moment reacting to hearing the news oh that's awesome that's fun and then it's it's almost like a mouth of babes thing You're like a kid. It's like telling a kid about eating ass.

Yeah. Yeah. You're in Denmark. You're in Denmark. You're in Denmark. They go, have you had the this? I'm like, what's that a disease? I'm like, wow.

Now it's your food. I don't really know. That's comedy. Yeah. Because you're not really even trying. You're just not trying to make jokes. You're just kind of saying how you're thinking. Yeah.

God, it is fun. Traveling is fun. I mean, if you can get rid of the. Plans. Passport, the flight, the, the, the, the car, all that. But I think it's good for you. It's good for you to like land in another in Denmark and be like, shit.

Do we take the train in? I don't know how to get there. Oh, all right. Well, give me a map and you figure it out. Yeah, it's uncomfortable. But also, once you do it a couple times, like that was never actually a problem. That's true. I just didn't know, but it was never a problem.

But some people just aren't built for it. They land somewhere and they're like, I don't know. They're like overwhelmed and they panic. And get me to the hotel where I can like lock myself in and look out the window. Exactly. Those people are going to die alone. It's a less fulfilling life. But they're comfortable.

I love that you're going around now. I'm getting everywhere. The chick helps where it's like, tell you what, I'll go there, I'll stay an extra week. Yes. Come meet me. So we're going to Greece. I'm doing Greece, Oslo, Helsinki, something else in Dublin. That's the order?

Yeah. Greece, Oslo. Helsinki. Never been to Helsinki? Want to? Bad. Tried on this last time tour and they could get it. Somewhere else I can't think of.

Dublin and what? Dublin's the last one. It's a quickie. You're starting in Greece. Yeah. You got some tips for you for Greece. Oh, please. But you got to go a week early.

I'm going a week early. Okay. So that's on her, though. That's her idea. Her to like schedule. No, she was like, let's go a week early. And I was like, oh, okay, good idea. So we're going to try to hit a bunch of islands.

Yeah, I found one great one. And then Athens is underrated. That's where I'm going. Yeah. That's where the gig is. But like hang out there for a couple days. Oh, okay. The sites of the sites obviously do the sites, see stuff from before time, you know.

Yeah. But also, it's an anarchist city. What? It's got cool artists. It's like, the vibe is like pretty wild. The food is, I mean, so fresh and so good. But on the other side of the park of where all the fucking, you know, the ruins are, it's like, like, like upscale food. And then the one thing I'd recommend is outdoor movie theater.

Whoa. Doesn't matter what movie. Really? Go there, smoke a cigar. A drive? No, you go in, there's a storefront, and in the back there's a big courtyard. And then you go in and sit there, you can drink beers, you can roll cigarettes and smoke them. Wow.

I watched two movies there. One was like an old film noir thing. Another one was a French movie with subtitles in Greece. Whoa. Couldn't follow along, except for kind of following along in black and white. And you enjoyed it? I enjoyed the shit out of it. Interesting.

Except when a cat ran through the screen and then just kind of looked at us and kept going. Wow. It's some nice weather out. Yeah. I'm going to go to another beer. Okay. Okay, because I heard Athens was like kind of dicey. It was kind of run down.

Bro. This is good to hear. Yeah, no. At least two nights in Athens. Okay. The islands are a different thing. The islands are where they go on vacation. But Athens rule underrated town.

I can't wait. Because you hear mechonos and obviously. Don't go to there. Yeah. Don't go to the tourist ones. I can't fit in over there. Yeah. But, yeah, so I'm pumped.

This is good news. We were in one and it was like, I was on a scuba diving trip, and every time we'd go to where we're going, we'd pass by Tom Hanks's a vacation house. Damn. And they go, Tom Hanks lives there. I'm like, where is like, that house right there.

That's not where Tom Hanks left. Every single person we talked about, you know Tom Hanks lives there. Oh, Tom Hanks has a house there. And it's like, fuck, the guy just wants to be. And literally, it's a tour stop now. It's a mention that he owns a home there. In Athens?

No, in one of the islands. Oh, okay. I think his wife's Greek. Yeah, I think you're right. Maybe, I don't know. Read a something. Read a month of, I don't know. Can't say a Greek name.

I read a book. Halkius. Yeah. Yeah, so I can't wait. Oslo. Have you been to Oslo? Love it. Love Oslo.

I tried to do only places I'd never been. And Oslo is one. But I've been to Oslo and I wanted to go back. But you want to go back to some of them. I'll go every time. I love it. So it is interesting. They give us these tours and it's like set tours.

Yeah, I know. And then you're like, okay, but also I would like to do this. Yeah. Couldn't get me a hells thinking, but they did get in Romania and Lubliana, Slovenia. and I'm all in on Eastern Europe. I heard Slovenia is underrated. Okay. We'll get into that next episode.

So you got to go like, you know what you do the tour is like Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, then off. Then Thursday, Friday, Saturday, then off. So your money Tuesday, Wednesday is either you stay in the city you just finished or you go early to the next city. Yes. And you got to make some decisions on which to bury on Friday and Saturday. What do you mean Barry? In another city in the morning, I go there, do the show the next day I leave. So you're not really hanging out there much.

Oh, got it, got it. So Brussels. I'm always going to bury Brussels. I've heard nothing but it's just a boring town. Brussels is boring. Yeah, good show, so do it, but there's nothing to see and do. I completely... So I'll bury that. I buried Ljubljana Slovenia, and when I got there in the not too late,

kind of like noonish, walked around whatever, and I was like, I fucked up. I should have been in for four days. I've done that. I've done that. This is one of the towns. Berlin will always leave wide open. Sure, sure. But then Romania, too.

Really? I want to do all. I want to Budapest, Romania. I know. All these, like, that's a different Europe. Yeah. Europe is a different Europe. I want to go to Prague real bad.

Yeah, that kind of shit. I've never done that. O'Neils went there. Uh-huh. Yeah. Wow, Salvini, I'm down. I want to go to those little German towns, too. Like Cologne, I heard it's cool.

Is that German? Sounds like. Okay. Yeah. I heard Cologne. Colona Hamburgers were Kevin Ryan's wife's from. Oh, really? Yeah.

Oh, wow. Crazy. but you want to go to a new town and they have these runs for you and Dublin's always good you gotta go to Dublin in London obviously You gotta do it And then like figure it out

I know Oslo rule where Daniel's from Bergen I like even better than Oslo Oh really? If you're gonna hang out because it's more artsy Okay

But the sights wise And a couple cool bars Oslo for sure Yeah Because Australia is kind of cheating in a way Like I'm going back there in two weeks Yeah And New Zealand

But Australia it's like It's like, we did an episode, it's New York in the 80s or America in the 80s. It's just all about fun. Canada, Australia, even London. It's America. It's a version of the same shit. London, too. Same shit.

We're all the same shit. And we're Australia-light. It's all the same shit. Right. You're not, it's not different enough. It's not different enough. I mean, it's fun as shit. Yeah.

Sydney, the Bondi Beach. Flatwhite, the Melbourne. Yeah. But yeah, you want that punch in the face. Holy shit. But I don't want to go to, I've been to Iran, too. And that's, I didn't enjoy it. it's just too weird and sandy and a bummer we went to um cobs once me diaz and rogan and dyes went to

tom sawyer the old uh i don't know if you ever met him the old club owner of cobs and um he goes hey i want to go i want to get some authentic chinese food take us after the show i want some really authentic chinese food in san francisco i want to get that he goes all right i got the spot for you we went popular place for really authentic chinese food and dyes we order and dyes just kind of like pushing his food around and just kind of like sitting there and we're all eating it's like what's a matter and he sees crawfish with like the heads on and stuff and he goes it's uh it's a it's a little too authentic yeah i went to china i felt the same way i was like this sucks oh yeah it puts some sugar in it sugar eyes and brown gooey sauces well let's wrap it up but but let's do this actually

where where in the world is by the way one more time go see Mark Normans. I've already put this in earlier. Go see Mark Murman's new stand-up comedy special. Oh, wow. When does this come out? Your special came out yesterday. Oh, okay. Great. Well, Merry Christmas. Do you know the name of it? I forget now. No way. No way. Oh, it's already out. Yeah. I'm calling it. None too, please. None too please. Yeah. It's part of a joke I have. Great. None too please. It's available right now on on Netflix.com. No, wait. I have to cover the to come. We don't know where it's going.

None too, please. Everybody check it out on Netflix. And we'll... There you go. So here's what I do. Also, I'll just say this. Mark is, I shouldn't say this with him in here, legitimately one of the best comics in the world

and has been for quite some time. And it's a great time for stand-up comedy where not just Mark, but we're friends with a bunch of people who are like Hall of Famers. Unbelievable. And we're in the prime. I went to see the Yankees and took my brother.

And I'm like, Aaron Judge gets up to bat. And I'm like, what we're seeing is a Hall of Famer in his best years. 100%. And it's what a rare opportunity. Yeah. Comedy is like ripe with that right now. Oh, yeah. And you're one of them.

It's like fucking fun to see. I don't know if I'm Aaron Judge, but I'll take it. I mean, you're at least Jose Altuve. I'll take it. I mean, at minimum. So everybody goes see that. Also check out we might be drunk and Tuesdays of stories always. But Mark, before we go.

Thank you. Two things we do here. And you be tripping. What country is calling? It doesn't have to be one, but just one of them that's really like, I got to get there. Yeah. Don't have to be the one. And then the other one is a travel tip.

But let's do that one first. Okay. So I want to go to Prague. You want to go to Prague. I want to go to Thailand. You've been to Thailand? Never been to Thailand. You've been to Thailand?

Yeah. Okay. There's gigs there. Oh, really? But it's like free hotel and $500 gigs. Well, it's $500 there. It's a million dollars here. And when you get there, people telling you what to do and helping you go out in a scary place.

So that is very nice. I like that. So maybe I go Thailand. Never been. South Korea seems interesting. Japan seems interesting. Thailand is the most accessible tourist spot of Southeast Asia. Really?

It's the most set up. So if you're looking to be adventurous, anyone at home too, if you're looking to be adventurous in Southeast Asia, but you're scared. start in Thailand and then get deeper from there. But it's wild enough. Bangkok is disgusting, but you need to do two days at least. All right, I'll do it. But then go out from there, and it's like your entryway into a safe, kind of mapped out version of Southeast Asia.

And then after that, if you like it, you can go to more of it. You can go to Laos and the Philippines and later, like, Myanmar and East Timor. But there's a bunch of like okay ones and, you know. But Thailand's a start. Okay, that's good because I need a start, but it's still, is it too pushy? I don't love pushy. Bangkok, yes. Okay.

Changmai, no. Pouquet, less so, and then the smaller places, no. And then there's resort Thailand, which is just so luxurious. Really? It's just like there's beaches where you can get a massage for, let's say it's gone up, $12. Wow. And then you go and you get a massage literally on the beach. Yeah.

And so you're getting a massage by a Thai massage lady doing Thai massage. Oh my God. Step on your back while you're hearing the ocean. I got to do it. And then the next day they go, another massage is like, no, I just got one. Well, it's $12. Yeah. Yeah, I'm just going to hang out at the beach.

Let me hang out of the beach while I'm getting a massage for $12. I'm going to Thailand, God damn it. By the way, another great gay bar. I'm going to Thailand, God damn it. No, Bangkok. Too easy. Too easy. But we're keeping a streak alive.

Yeah. Okay. So there you go. Thailand it is. I'll give you advice on both. But, yeah, William Chilgers brought me to Thailand. Damn. Yeah.

And then, I mean, the people have gone, Gina Yashre had been there before, right before I got there. Okay. It's a run. It's a gig and it's like pretty fucking cool. All right, I'm in. And then get out of there instantly and go to other places. It's full moon parties. Whoa.

Man, these little islands blow my mind. Where? Which ones? Well, just all these. Isn't it a map? I can't stop staring at it. Maldives, Seychelles, Mauritius. Then all this shit.

This reunion? That's France. French owned. this. Damn, that's crazy. Yeah, all those were like, are those even countries? Or are those like...

This is UK. France owns that too, French Polynesia. Been there. Really? I try to do two new countries every year and sometimes they get into December and haven't done one. Holy shit. And I was in the West Coast. I'm like,

what can I get to from the West Coast? Of course. And so it was like, boom there, let's go. Wow. Yeah. Vanuatu. Vanuatu. Caledonia. The northern Mariana Island.

United States. Have you ever heard of that? Where? We own that? Oh my God. Guam I've heard of. It's crazy to think that people had to die. Like they had a lot of deaths just to get that little speck.

Just take it over. And so it's just a place to store your boat for a minute. Yeah. Unreal. Okay, the last thing I say is travel advice. This could be either specific. I'm going to go first. All right.

Because I have one. Please. Specific or general. And I've had general ones like travel light. I've had specific ones like when in this place. I'll say one, but this is not for this one, but I've said it before. If you're going to China, bring a small pack of travel tissue paper because you will need it for shitting when there's no tissue paper. That's a good one.

Yeah, so that's a specific one. Here's one for Mexico City. And in fact, you might want to use it for Guadalajara too. The street tacos are so good and you're going to want to eat a lot. my advice to everybody is one taco and move one taco and move it will allow you eat more tacos because you're going to eat four like this is so good let me get a lot and then you get to another place it looks just as good and you're like oh I'm full one taco next one taco next that way you can get seven tacos instead of five in you because you're moving different varieties

that's good taco and move is my advice that's good stuff what do you got okay mine's a weird one yeah something to bring in the suitcase Oh, okay. One, every big trip you go to, Thailand, whatever the fuck, bring a little JBL speaker or a pill speaker. This thing will change the whole trip. Now you're not just getting a massage on the beach. You're getting a massage on the beach while listening to Kendrick Lamar.

Wow. Or you're in your hotel getting ready and you got the music going. You're in Berlin. Let's play some music instead of on your phone in a cup. Yes, yes. You get the actual sound. It's this big. At worst, this big.

Exactly. And sometimes it's like this. Changes the whole trip. Now you're in Mexico on the water like with some with some fucking OAR playing. Yeah. And on that canal. Look, let's play some beats. Oh, exactly.

Perfect example. The Bluetooth is great. It's right there. Yeah. That and no one's going to like to listen to for the kids. Tell the kids it's turn it off. Hold on. Hold on.

Bring some adderol because A, there's always times on a trip where you go, I could go see the pyramids or I could go to the canals or I could go to this weird island on a boat. I just got, I'm dead. I'm over. I'm tired. We've been traveling. Pop half an addie or a quarter one just to get going and you'll be glad you did. And in 10 years when you got that fucking photo framed of you in the water in Malaysia, you're going to go, thank God I had that Adderall.

It's not sleep when you die. It's sleeping you get back to America. Hey! That's a good note to go out on. Red Band wrote me He was with Kill Tony in Australia I think it was Kill Tony He might just been with Tony

But I don't know And he goes hey any advice They all want to go Pet the koalas But I'm too tired And I said Red Band You're gonna remember the koalas For the rest of your life

And you're gonna forget how tired you were You should suck it up And then go to sleep right afterwards 1,000% He goes I was like how with the koalas It goes I went to sleep

I missed it I regret it I'll never not regret it There you go. Get an Adderall. Get an Adderall. Get the help you need. Get the Adderall.

To get to the pyramid. Coffee won't do it. Get the Adderall. Yeah. Mark Norman, everybody. All right. Thank you, folks. Thank you, buddy.

Comedy. Well, that's the episode, everybody. I'm going to probably film here a bunch. And if you compare, you can see Spring just starting to pop its way into New York City. I mean, the buds are just like barely popping out. Spring means rebirth. that's a good commercial later. Nothing like like rebirth, like the rebirth of the greatest stand-up

comedy show, the coolest stand-up comedy show in history. I don't say that lately. It's actually not really debatable. Ari's storytelling show. Later was renamed Ari's wait, this is not happening. Later was renamed Ari's renamed Storytelling Show. Now it's called The End.

It's available. I'm going to pretend to be on the phone because I don't want to act like I'm not like I'm doing a promo in the middle of a park, it's embarrassing. Yeah, today's episode is produced by the YMH Network, your mom's house network, and it's edited by Alan Caffee, and maybe also

like Chris Larsen, hey, buddy. YMH also produced the end for me. I'm using a streaming service. By the way, that money is going to me. I see some comments. Why is Tom making all the money? Are you crazy? you think I'm going to let Tom take that what a what a dumb stance do you know who I am

you know what I'm famous for low tips not paying my taxes you think the idea that you got anyway but I did thank all my money into this show that Mark Norman's on please get the pre-sale right now at a ryeshaffir dot com $25 for seven one-hour episodes and the prologue VIP package for a hundred signed limited edition poster if If you want something swift to put on your wall, everybody's picture on there. And you can take them to comedy clubs and get every single person to sign them. It might take you a couple of years. But if you get them all, ooh, what a collectible.

The mumbo-jumbo tour for Mark Norman is on now. Lexington, Kentucky, Fort Lauderdale, Minneapolis, Raleigh, Spokane, Philadelphia, Milwaukee, Irvine, Tempe, Royal Oak, Michigan, and Cleveland, Ohio. And don't forget to watch a special to wet your whistle. None too pleased on Netflix right now. to subscribe wherever you're watching or listening. Next week's episode is, oh, I know this. I know this.

I don't know which one. I don't know which one, but subscribe, dude. They're all bangers. I saved the best bangers for this run. Yeah, the end. Get it right now. RSUB.com. 2499.

Support me and support independent live comedy. For real, guys, I could have done this with somebody else. I could have listened to some suits, tell me what the order should be and how I should make it and it's too long or you're letting the stories go. Oh, Jim Brewer. I forgot about him. Cills! Episode two is Steve Simon and Nate Bargazzi. What an episode. Anyway, yeah, get it. That's it. Mexico, what a cool place. I do want to go back. Since I actually went, went on my last trip. Southern Mexico, Oaxaca, and some other places that

I guess I'll get into when I have Ari Maddie and Tony Hinchcliffe on. That won't be next one. week now. Talking about my entire trip. I know I just covered Peru with Seguer. I'll cover a lot more. And that's it. I'm back to filming. Back in the States, I'll let you know. It's been overwhelming. It's been a bit overwhelming. I'm still seeing this place as an outsider. And I'm like, everyone's so politicized. One, like so politicized. I forgot about it. And then in New York, nobody says hello, which is also a weird thing. That's how it in Brazil. All right, everybody. That's it. Thank you very much. Goodbye. I actually love this show. I actually really love doing this show. I love talking to people about travel. I love hearing their stories. I haven't really filmed an episode except with Tom and that's been about me in a long time

So now I got to get back into it and I'm kind of like looking forward to it people are kind of bragging to me now, which is weird They're kind of like bragging about their own trips and the reality is I want to hear them So I got to start filming again. Oh, no, no, no, you know who's next week? You know who's next week? You know who's next week? Nope. Dude, I fucked up. It's not from the show next week. It's not from the show. Ooh, it's sabbatical Tommy.

Unless I get in touch with them, he says not, we're putting sabbatical Tommy. One of the greatest travelers in the world on here. We had his friend Small Brain American. I'm so sorry, Small Brain and American. What happened to your brain? They got him in Peru. They get the mushing thing with the skull elongated. But he rolled with it and he called himself Small Brain to American.

And now Sabatical Tommy. Yeah, that's the one, right? Yeah, that's the one. Okay, that's a great one. Subscribe, guys. You don't want to miss these. It's all about crime and getting in trouble with the law all over where he goes. Oh, I forgot about that one.

We did it like a year ago. Yeah, it's such a good one. He gets arrested in Russia. He's in China border. He's in China border. The guy's nuts, dude. I think right now he's in some, like, I think he might be in Iran right now, like, building a bridge over the Strait of Hormuz.

Shout out Hormor's Rashidi. Man, your Google image. Way down now, right? That sucks. Okay, next week. Who should I have it on? Anyway, leave comments. Help my algorithm. Just leave a comment for the algorithm. Bye, bye, everybody. This time of year, the school calendar really starts to fill up. Spring activities, testing season, and that final push toward the end of the year.

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