You Should Know Podcast - ADDRESSING THE VIDEO! -You Should Know Podcast-

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Starting point is 00:02:22 As you should know, podcast, the best patron in the world. Hey! You get, you get, you get, you know, You get at least five, you get at least five hours of extra content per week, right? Something like that. We have, I tell you, it is basically like a Netflix over there. We have like six different shows. It is the most content.

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Starting point is 00:03:12 We got go host cam. Back in the studio. Back in the video. Yeah. These cam was out here snitching. They with the rat pat. Fah! Hit them on the chopper.

Starting point is 00:03:27 That's that rat. Fah! Oh, I got it. This FAA! Sorry. I love that way too much. We got goes. Oh I looked at my son in his face. I'm when I got this FAA! You did what? No, I didn't hit him. No, I didn't hit him. I didn't know I pretended. Oh, yeah. He liked it though. Yeah. He was like this.

Starting point is 00:03:45 That's not good. Well, a little bit of shock factor first. Can I talk about your son? Let's talk about them. First of all, happy week to you. Come here. Give me some. Happy week to you. Happy week. Happy week. Happy week. Oh my God. Happy life. Happy life. Happy wife. Take your pants off. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Something flew.

Starting point is 00:04:09 Hey, let me out of here. Let me out here. He said, it's so long. Those lights are so right. I'd look great. Can I say, can I say one thing? One thing, yeah, and this is about your son. Okay.

Starting point is 00:04:27 We went to a pumpkin patch with your son. We did. Because there's going to be a Patreon video that comes out on Halloween of me and Kim going one-on-one, pumpkin carving, and the judge is ultimately Malachi Jebediah Rufus Enfrey Kenediah Kennedy. He is, yes, yes, yes. Great video, Halloween is the day a drop. It's a great video, it's over on the Patreon for Prime and Royalty members, right? Yes, sir. Beautiful video.

Starting point is 00:04:48 I am really happy about this video. Yes. Behind the scenes of this video, though, your son was there. He was. He was. Right, this is Malachi's first pumpkin pet. First ever. Beautiful time.

Starting point is 00:05:00 Beautiful time. He was in these, what was that? Overalls? Yeah, overalls. Flamboyant type of shoes. Hey, hey. Whoa. They were flamboyant shoes.

Starting point is 00:05:09 They were furry. They were definitely, I'm in musical theater. I mean, they were, I'm a cute baby. My mom likes to dress me like I'm a grown man already. They were cute little like baby like they were kind of crock things. I'm not saying they weren't cute. I thought they were adorable. Oh, then call them adorable.

Starting point is 00:05:21 They're adorable. They're adorable. Flamboying there. I'm just kidding. Just adorable. They were adorable little crocs. They were adorable cute little shoes. They're claw, yeah, claw, oh, you know, you, you warranted it.

Starting point is 00:05:32 Okay. They with the rat pet. Bha! All right, here we go. You need to do better at fathering your son. No, I think that's where we start this episode. You can't just blanket that. I do.

Starting point is 00:05:43 How? Why? You know, I, you know, there's a bit of viral clip of me talking about Malachi going to the pool. All right? Yes. And I was talking about y'all, I don't like the way y'all dress him to the pool. I don't like it. Very white.

Starting point is 00:05:55 You got to protect the skin. And I made fun of him saying he's an indoor. baby, right? And all the comments were like, on one of the accounts I clipped it, they were saying, oh, Peyton, you shouldn't talk about it. I'm like, that's a baby. When I'm when he grows up, well, I don't care. But you hear that? Now, he went to the pumpkin patch. A lot of hay, a lot of grass. Correct. I didn't know in Malachi's eight months of being on this earth, he's never touched grass. He's touched grass. He's not fully comfortable with it. That's there's a big difference. How many times did he touch grass? He's definitely 100%. No exaggeration. Touched grass. At least

Starting point is 00:06:27 double digits. Now, no shot. That's not a baby that's touched grass a double-digit amount of time. No, no, now listen to me. Like, you ever seen a dog? Hey, ears, ears right now, big ears. Just to prove that he's wrong, you ever seen a dog put on those shoes and they try to walk around the house like that? That was Malachi as soon as he touched grass. And I guarantee it after the 10th time, that dog's still not going to like it because they feel contained. They feel unhuman, un-dog, un-canine. So Malachi in the grass, this is my son, my backyard, my house. I know how many times he's done it. He has been taken and set on his tush in my backyard. Big tush. Big tush. Big old man. He's got that little crack. Long crack on the baby. Long crows up to like

Starting point is 00:07:09 the L3. Yeah. We should get that checked out. I mean he has a lot of it might just means he has a lot of eventually. Now see now this is where y'all need to go to hell because you sick goblins, clean your mind. Correct. It's like almost like these cam ones out here snitcher, they went to a rat pack. Here we go. What I was saying, my son has 100% touched grass double digit times, more than nine, less than 100. But

Starting point is 00:07:37 he doesn't like crawling in it yet due to multiple reasons. Majority of his grass touching days came before his knees. It came before he crawled. He wasn't mobile. It was kind of just plop him and sit him. He looks cute. Son hits his face. Take a couple pictures. Take him inside to me. It doesn't stink. God bless. But now,

Starting point is 00:07:53 right. Now this is probably one of the first times he has fully sat and touched grass with optimum mobility. Okay. Doesn't like it. Doesn't like it. Didn't like it. He didn't cried loud. God, he didn't do what he was supposed to. I reprimended him for that. And he's sold a good part of what we had going, but don't worry, we fixed it. We fixed it. We fixed it. Yeah, my kid, he's not going to be nothing wrong with all the indoor babies. Your kid is a, your kid is a prima donna like nepo baby. He is because whenever I brought it up to you as a brother, Because I can say things to you that the majority of people can't.

Starting point is 00:08:29 I can be real with you. If something's not right, I'll tell you. Correct. So I'm like, hey, bro, fix my nephew. I don't like that. Like, as soon as you go home, lay him out on some grass, make him nap there. Right? And I go, has he ever been outside?

Starting point is 00:08:42 Cam goes, yeah, he's been outside in his stroller with the fan in it. Okay, that's on walks when it's hot as hell and the sun's bright. Again, my son is a vampire. Extremely pasty. Now, let's go back to the statistics, right? Yeah. You said in his eight months. of life. He's not good on grass, right? Eight months, pretty small sample size, right?

Starting point is 00:09:02 Yeah. So now what if here in maybe a couple months he starts talking and then maybe a year later he can fully form sentences? And he goes, Uncle P, why did you complain about me as an eight month old in grass when you, when you're 28 and you can't swim and you don't like water? Hmm, because I'm more black than you, Malachi. And he goes, skin color doesn't matter when it comes to swimming into water. Oh, I go, let me tell you something. Oh, let me teach you. No, but I'm just saying because whenever I was eight months old, I was already doing outside activities.

Starting point is 00:09:32 Oh, because you can just big bam, boom, recall the memories. Oh, I remember when I was eight months old. Oh, it was great time. No, I don't remember it, but I have photos. I was, I had a petting zoo when I was eight months old. I was at a petting zoo. Like I was inside with the animals. Okay.

Starting point is 00:09:48 Now, this is getting fascinating because he literally, at that pumpkin patch, was in a petting zoo. No, no, different. With animals at eight months old. I was in the chicken coup. You were holding him next to the pigly wiggly. Okay, well, they had their chickens hostage. They were in that little house. He didn't put him in the house.

Starting point is 00:10:04 He was right next to that goat named Titan or whoever's name. A big goat. Dude. That was a creepy goat. Weird goat. Oh, God. A goat without horns is a goat I don't like. I don't like a hornless goat.

Starting point is 00:10:17 You just look like a coward and you're going to like slime me. Oh, I don't like it. Goats are so unpredictable. Do pumpkin patch is getting. of you racism vibes. Now let's just talk about it slightly. It depends on where they're at. It's just it's something about it. Majority of things do. I really can't okay well like Sonic whenever they used to rollerblade up to you. I was like that does not feel relevant now. That doesn't feel like of today. You understand what I'm saying? That doesn't feel of today. But I also don't immediately go,

Starting point is 00:10:45 that's not right. That's a little hateful. No, I just think I'm like, why the fuck you rollerblade? Yeah. We got little robots with faces driving meals to people and you're on roller. skates. Oh, and like Cracker Barrel, everybody that works or goes to a Cracker Barrel, their favorite holidays, Fourth of July. Like, 100%. Like, not Christmas, not Halloween, Thanksgiving, Fourth of July is their bread and butter, which is fine. But you've got to understand the connotation that comes with that. Their second favorite is Columbus Day. Pierce said, do not call me on Columbus Day. I'm not coming in. I'm not working. It is the day of rest. It is the day that our founding.

Starting point is 00:11:25 and fine. That my and love for us, boys. You're just, you're not appreciating it. Shut up, Pierce. This episode is brought to you by Rocket Money. You might think you have a solid handle on your budget.

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Starting point is 00:12:50 Now on to the rest of the episode. Okay, how was your week, Bubba? Oh, I love you, Pierce. Anything that went on that you want to tell me about? Or tell the audience about. Oh, man. Off rip. I got a story for you.

Starting point is 00:13:04 Say something. Okay. Why don't you say something? Why don't you make me say something? I'd make you stop saying something. One-on-one fight without fists. Who went? You and me.

Starting point is 00:13:15 No fist. Me. No. Paid. Without fist? Wait, what does that mean? Like, we can't use our arms? Yes.

Starting point is 00:13:22 Like, they're tied behind our back. It's like this? Oh, me. You think you... Cam, I already... You're not trained in any kicks and I have a battering ram as a skull. First of all, it's the beginning of the...

Starting point is 00:13:32 I would head butt the fatt of you. No, no, no. Your head is a registered weapon in Nevada. I'd break, though. The bridge of your nose would be shattered. Okay, but first of all, eight minutes into the episode. Yes. Early in the morning, why are you thinking

Starting point is 00:13:47 about imminent violence onto me? No, it's kind of like a quick thought. Just passing through. I wanted to give it to freedom. I feel like you have been more violent towards me recently. Like, you've been wanting to, like, when I walk past the studio, you're like, that, like, you'd buck at me now. But 100% I would win, because already when we wrestle, what do I do? I would love to hear this answer.

Starting point is 00:14:04 When we wrestle, what do you do? I bite. Okay, yeah, exactly. So I'm already going to bite. My arms are behind me. There's a lot to bite. A lot of meat to bite from. I'm like, I'm going to go this roll.

Starting point is 00:14:17 No, this one. That one's here. That is... I get to the gut, so much to work. You go, God! You just start taking bites? Okay, there's no arms. So you're going to charge me like this.

Starting point is 00:14:32 No, I'm going to get in you. And I'd knock you with my head, teeth, crooked. Your head is going to be the biggest disadvantage. I mean, your head, regardless, even in a normal fight. You lose. Oh, yeah. Oh, someone would hate for me to headbut him. I mean, right there.

Starting point is 00:14:47 It's the worst. Top of that, that little hard point right there. just right to your sh- I'm glad years of you denying how disgustingly violent in larger skull is that you finally come around now that's not true now if I was the average height of the average united states male with this noggin I'd be in history books yeah now oh yeah because my body continued to bless me and grow in my favor yeah and the head remained the same ever since I was 13 years of age what body part grew up going 16 I go uh I go sophomore in high school it's a big everybody.

Starting point is 00:15:21 Just Wait, when does, okay. Okay. Now we can get into it. Anatomy with YSK. Huh.

Starting point is 00:15:29 Anatomy with YSK. Here we go. Okay. So you're Johnson. Yes. When? Yeah. When is it done?

Starting point is 00:15:39 You know what's crazy? Because we can grow until we're like 25, apparently. I don't think he grew in the 20s. But I don't know. You want me to be honest with, yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:48 I don't think. I think I'm the only penis on earth that doesn't have a regulated size. No. Can I say this? Though, every day I wake up, you're not the only one. No, no, no. Every day I wake up, it's so different. And then in different, like, parts of the day.

Starting point is 00:16:04 Like, it's just, there's no sense of consistency. If, like, somebody were to ask, like, come up to me with a million dollars, be like, how big is it? I was like, what time is it? You know what day is? I don't know. It's like Kino Dertotan. You're hitting that mystery box. Who's Kino D'Arturton?

Starting point is 00:16:17 You get an M-60. You get an M-16. a little oozy. And in that one morning, you get that rayon. And you go, where is she? You go come here. It's the best day. You got to see him today.

Starting point is 00:16:29 You got to talk to him. Kino Dertotin is a map of zombies. Oh. That's some nerd. Yeah, enough of a genitalia. Sorry, thank you for that journey. I'm right there with you, though. I'm never once like, oh, it's the same every day.

Starting point is 00:16:39 Some days the showers feel real cold. Yeah. And some days my body's just hanging low. Do you understand that this whole thing I started with, like, what happened in your week? And you brought it into fighting me and then talking about our anatomy. So sorry. So my niece's birthday, Coralie, she had a birthday party this weekend, right? We go, beautiful, fun. Good old Daxon. Okay. Daxon was a polite young gentleman. He waited for his sister and all of her friends to knock down that old pina. To those who don't know who's

Starting point is 00:17:05 Daxon. Daxon's my nephew. Coralie's brother, he's younger, he's like four. Okay. So your four-year-old nephew. Four-year-old nephew waits for all the eight-year-olds, the big kids, they're done, they knock the pinata, they fight over the candy. He goes, now's my time to shine. You love it. Daddy, can I, uh, can I put the pinata back up and break it? Yeah, sure. Mark puts it back up. He goes, but I need people to watch me. People have to watch me do this. I agree with them. And I go, oh, I'll bite, kid. All right, come on. I walk over there. And it was the exact, exact same thing that happened in that video on the golf course, where the guys walk. walking up and the guy rear backs and hits his shin with the club and he goes made it tears

Starting point is 00:17:51 I literally walk up he goes uncle can't pull it make it go I go all right so to do that you got to he literally takes the bat and goes right in my knee yeah and I literally went mother fuck oh and I'm looking away from it and he's still just swinging and I take the thing and I kind of throw it toward him it's an empty pinata it's just like a cardboard box I throw it toward him, he goes, he's trying to fight in, and I am just in agony. He'll give him a real bat? It's like, it's like, it's plastic, but

Starting point is 00:18:23 it's one of those thin plastic ones. So it gives you a little stain. It's not a lot of air in it. It's, oh, that's stung. I didn't know a little stain. I'll have a bruise tomorrow. Yeah. So then I am pissed.

Starting point is 00:18:34 So he goes, here, you hit it. And I go, all right, he gets out the way. I do not strike him with the bat. I take it one hand. I hit it clean in the middle of that pinata. Explodes. I throw the bat down. I go,

Starting point is 00:18:45 you. And I walked off. It hurts so bad. You are that adult, right? Oh, yeah. He, I, my mission is to mess with that boy. Every time he sees me, he just walks in me and goes, yeah, y'all been boxing for a minute. Yeah, I love him though. Dude, it was, I, it was hard not to laugh. Yeah. Because it was that exact same scene from that video. Yeah. It was, I was talking to him, and he just, and I went, me. It's like, it hurts so bad, bro. Oh, it was funny. This episode is brought to you by Draft King Sportsbook. All your favorite NBA players are back in Draft King Sportsbook and official sports betting partner of the NBA is the place to bet on NBA stars this season.

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Starting point is 00:20:58 So you had like a wholesome family week and that's great. I don't have those. I don't have family here, but that's great. I had a retribution type of week. All right. Like, I would. woke up the other day to I kid you not two hundred thousand notifications oh no joke 200,000 notifications and it the internet finally knows I do not lie on this podcast can I say I told y'all so yeah I told you all so so if you remember like three week four weeks five weeks back I don't even remember when this was yeah probably three or four I told the story about how I went to the mall and this girl came up to me she hit on me like asking for directions to my heart fantastic by the way it's a great fire line quote unquote oh that's fire

Starting point is 00:21:59 that's fire yeah I'm gonna break down this video because my perception of how things went is not how I looked in that video little different different man oh my god I wake up my dad sent me this video my mom sent me this video all my friends sent me this video oh i just liked and reposted it i'm kidding i'm kidding i'm kidding why you're reposting that okay so look so look so what see ravi's trying to hit on her so i told this story about this girl hitting on me at the mall yes the story did pretty well on tic-tok like everybody was like oh this is another one of Peyton's stories. But there's always that part of the internet that's like, oh, these guys are liars. They lie about all the... So there was still a majority of those comments under that

Starting point is 00:22:49 story, regardless of the story was. Yeah, all that. Right. A couple days ago, the girl who hit on me at the mall just decided to post the video, right? She didn't know who I was or what the podcast was or that I talked about it. So all the comments were like, oh shit, but... Peyton wasn't lying. Peyton wasn't lying. And they talked about this on YSK podcast. And the girl that took the video was responding to all these comments being like, who the f f is Peyton?

Starting point is 00:23:19 And what's the YSK podcast? Now, the way I told the story, I told the story how it went, right? Pretty accurate. You can see like almost line for line. Almost. And knowing me and my memory, going line for line on something is not a part of my bag. No. seeing that video right three million four million views no i think that what is that five million

Starting point is 00:23:44 views now so it's up six million it's almost a million lights yeah so like five million views in a day seeing that video has made me realize i look different than i think i do when interacting with people like that like that is a haunting thing to see it is i hate that holy holy Oh my god. Dude, first of all, let's start with the beginning of the video. Me walking through them all. Who the fuck was going to tell me I walk like that? I've been trying for years. No one said. I've been trying for years. I've been stiff up the back. Rock solid. I mean, it's like I'm still in the back brace for middle school. I've been trying dogs. Oh, oh dude, stop, man.

Starting point is 00:24:36 I love it, though. So I'm thinking, I'm thinking that I'm looking, I'm looking sexy when I'm walking, but reality I'm looking weird, right? I'm looking like I'm built together. I look like I was put together, glued you together. Like they bought me at the Lego store and they put me together, right? And so in my mind, even when I told the story,

Starting point is 00:25:02 when she goes, excuse me, excuse me, in my mind, I'm like this. Yeah. So how you don't even you have you have more like shrink in your hair like I could have sworn in my mind that's how I looked and and that's how I look at all times excuse me I thought I went like this in the video I'm like this yeah there's no one told me so much of the bottom teeth show why there's so much bottom teeth show when I talk How can I help you? This is, dude, oh, my God. No, no, and.

Starting point is 00:25:41 Oh, it's so good. This was four weeks ago before I started, like, my health journey, right? Well. This was, it was like four weeks ago. Yeah. No one told me I was that f***ick. Like, in that video, it looked like I needed a Nike training bra on. Like, my yiddies were out, dog.

Starting point is 00:26:00 Like, she could have played with me like this. She could have been like, can I have directions to your tibank? Like that's what she should have done. It's played with my B cups. She goes direction to your heart. No, she goes, what about your tibre? I'm not going to, she could have, oh, she could have, she could have squeezed me.

Starting point is 00:26:23 Oh, she goes, what do you say about that one, huh? So I'm looking at this video like, holy shit, I was big. I'm still big, I'm working on it. But I'm less than that now. I'm so and I'm thinking right whenever she's talking to me right asking for direction no no it wasn't a blow i was trying to get as far away from this she were talking i thought you just snobrogged into that couch as if you haven't literally like gurgled your own saliva mixed with a liquid and spit it everywhere you've done you've gurgled some of mine and spit it everywhere

Starting point is 00:26:57 that's too far and honestly i get i get the discomfort and i'm sorry all right but anyway Let's back to this video. Because this video is viral right now. We got to talk about it. It's 10 million views. Oh, yeah. Right. So.

Starting point is 00:27:13 So, like, in two days, going to have 30 million views, right? Like, this 28 million viewed video. Yeah, that's about 4 million likes right now. Have you looked? Anyway. So my tics are out. I'm fat. I turn around different than I think I do, right?

Starting point is 00:27:31 I think, right? I have this. thing whenever, especially like women are talking to me. And I wasn't like flirting with her. Obviously, I told her that I'm in a thing. Yeah. But I like to like, you know, show a sign of comfort to women, right? I look them deeply in their eyes when they speak to me.

Starting point is 00:27:48 Oh. Like I just, what I do, that's like a sign of respect to me. And so in my mind, I was doing that to her and I thought I look sexy. Like I'm hitting one of these. It's like a soft glaze and like a, I'm very calm. Right? So she's talking to me asking for directions. I think I'm going like this.

Starting point is 00:28:03 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I look at the video, I'm like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, go ahead. Who the f*** was I checking for? What? No one told me I look like this when I talk to people. You said, yeah, I'm actually in a... I was looking for people on the roof and shit.

Starting point is 00:28:29 Yeah, I've, I'm built like a bulldog. No, it's so. I'm a furry black bulldog. That's what I look like. I got an underbite, a gut, and I like, what the fuck, man? And I breathe with my mouth. Oh my God, you're an English bulldog. I'm an English bulldog.

Starting point is 00:28:52 Oh my God, you're an attractive English bulldog. Holy. Oh my God, put it on a shirt. Oh my God, put your face on it. Oh, my God. Bulldog put on a shirt. No, James is going to make that grabbing now. Oh, my God.

Starting point is 00:29:03 And to top it all off, the internet has this beautiful thing where they like to take screenshots of me and you and put them in the comments. Oh, my God. Now all the screenshots are me standing like this. No, I don't got no direction. I got a girl. What's your name? He said, I'm a relationship.

Starting point is 00:29:26 He said, oh no, that's fire though. That's fire. Dude, that is, I mean, that is, that's arguably like worst case scenario. Yeah. And it's, it's good that your word is now more valid to the masses. Like, yeah. This did happen. There's physical proof.

Starting point is 00:29:45 Yeah. But when you see a video of yourself, dog, oh, I mean, it, it. Who told me I, why didn't y'all say I walk like that? I've literally been telling you since like 2018. I'm like, dude, you need a foam roll. Like, you're stiff. Dude, I've been literally in my mirror practicing. my turn around Hayes. Like, like, I'm like, I'm trying to tuck the chin.

Starting point is 00:30:05 And it's almost like, it's almost like you, you were like yearning for someone to talk to you because you say, hey, excuse me, yeah? Like, you fucking immediate. Oh yeah, what's up? You? Yeah. Hey, hey. Hey. Like, dude. And I'm not going to, I watch it like eight times. Me too. It's impossible not to. So I am horrible. And as soon as it goes to the next person, I'm just like, Yeah, yeah, we're off now. Oh, my God, bro. But, you know what, CJ says about eight words a day. He took his eight words to make fun of me.

Starting point is 00:30:35 He was like, he was like, yeah, bro, your lower half was stiff, and it was all over above it. He said, he said, he said, it looks like your feet were planted in the ground with cement. You were like just, like, rotating. You're like, no, I don't really know, oh, me, I'm in a relationship, no. Hold on real quick. Yeah, and why is so much, why is so much of this out? So much of this is out.

Starting point is 00:31:00 It's not out. I think, okay, do you, do you bow your chest when you walk? No, not intentionally. Okay. Okay, that's fair. Really not. I just, just move the mic real quick and sit up dead straight. Just sit straight.

Starting point is 00:31:13 Like, you know, sorry, back knot on it. Like, you're just sitting, like, right there. Oh, a lot of pro nation. Move, move, y'all. Narrate my walk. Narrate your walk? How about I give you a sexy tune? S-ch-s-ch-s-ch-s-ch-s-ch-s-ch-s-ch-ch-s.

Starting point is 00:31:32 I think it's a . They're back! You're like, you're walking like K-Robb! Your arms are back, dog! Drop your arms. Now, okay, but from that, look, drop your arms. Where's the hand-held? Drop it into that.

Starting point is 00:31:47 I do not walk like that. No, you're just bad, Bub, I love you. Your hands are completely back. Okay, look. we're back right how am i so look the thing the biggest thing for you is so i was right your shoulders do pronate very very pronate they go forward yeah that's from that's very very typical people that game sit on a desk a lot yeah you're like that so so you in your instance you're thinking bring my whole arms back yeah reality you just keep your arms low yeah but just shoulders arms low bring your

Starting point is 00:32:25 your shoulders back. Arms low. Okay. No, like no one's watching. You just stand. You're not impressing anybody. Okay, here's how I stand. Now just, that's not even that bad.

Starting point is 00:32:34 I think it might be when there's nothing in your hands. I think when you're holding something, it's like. I had my phone and a drink in my hand. But that's like hand, like, I don't know. Okay, let's try. Let's try. Listen. Okay.

Starting point is 00:32:46 Let's try my turnaround. Hello. Okay. All right, you're trying to hit on me. CJ, we blur my lower back here. Okay. Blurne. Here we go.

Starting point is 00:32:56 Here we go. Here we go. Oh, fuck you. It's about to be winter. Here we go. Here we go. Yeah. Uh, excuse me.

Starting point is 00:33:05 What's up? Oh, God. Was that good? Oh, that was way too theatrical. Okay. Did you almost fall? Oh, here we go. Here we go.

Starting point is 00:33:15 Excuse me, sir. Excuse me. Sir, excuse me. Sir, excuse me. Yeah, what's up, Mom? No, you, I'm not your mom. I'm not your mom. You dropped your little phone back there, guy, huh?

Starting point is 00:33:24 What do you say? want to take a picture with you, you're walking all crooked, huh? I'm not your mommy. Bite me, loser. Okay, let's... One serious one. Okay, one serious one. Don't be theatrical. I'm not being just turn around normal. Okay, okay, okay, okay, here we go. Don't, CJ, blur my back here we go. Here we go. Uh, excuse me, excuse me. Yeah, what's going on? Now the tour of the dude is, no, that was bad. He was bad. You literally did you just say a full-blown spit. Yeah, okay, that's my bad. One One more. One more.

Starting point is 00:33:57 Here we go. Here we go. Uh, excuse me? Yeah, what's up? You knocked over a drink. Oh my God, he can't help himself. Oh my God, he can't do it. Okay.

Starting point is 00:34:08 All right, whatever. I'm going back down. I'm going back down. The f***ing aluminum noise. It went dung on. Oh my God. Well, that's, I'm just saying... Oh, no, no, he's gonna cry.

Starting point is 00:34:24 He's gonna get in his car and cry. Oh, my God, you're going to cry. God, you're lower back. Let me see real quick. Will you braid my lower back hair? Wait, will you braid my lower back hair? You just went from rub to braid in two seconds. Can you braid?

Starting point is 00:34:39 No. I mean, I've tried on Liv's hair, not on the fine little pubicness. Yeah. I'm just saying, bro, it's just... How do you get it to lock up like that? I'm just saying, bro, like... That video made me look at myself so differently. No.

Starting point is 00:34:55 I, that video is one of the greatest things ever. Yeah. Because it's so funny, but it also reminded me. It's like those moments, you said it perfectly. The overarching story, 100% true. It happened. Now, when you recalled it in your mind, some dramatization came in and you remember things a little different.

Starting point is 00:35:14 Yeah, okay, but you got to understand. I experienced it not through the lens of her film or her band meta creep glasses. Whenever your mind is going through something, I was going through a panic attack. I was genuinely freaking out. I had enough. You thought she had four arms. She's like,

Starting point is 00:35:28 she was like, Doc, Ock. General Grevis with eight lightsaber is going at me. This episode is brought to you by Factor. Cameron, Peyton. Fall always feels like a reset. Do you know? 100%. Yes.

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Starting point is 00:37:31 It's like the same scenario when I was younger. We were at this, it was like a social. Did y'all have socials? Dude. What? Oh. Mom took me to the deaf social. No, that's not a joke.

Starting point is 00:37:45 No, it's not, I'm not funny. The deaf social for the school of the deaf. The teacher deaf. Oh, uh-huh. No. Why were you there? Why the hell? What age was this? Oh, I was probably about six. Why did your mother, of all, of all people on this beautiful earth, dry?

Starting point is 00:38:10 So I could do that. Shout to all our deaf... Oh no! No! Those were blind... No, they weren't. They were dead! They were dead!

Starting point is 00:38:49 Shout out there. We just... We used to talk about this day. Oh my God, I didn't know what was going to be today. I'm so sorry. Oh. But if they're, if they're, if they're, if they watch the YouTube videos, then they just saw that. Or they have the captions.

Starting point is 00:39:04 Either or they have the captions. Oh, man, that's that, that, that's that, that you, that's, that's, that's something. I'm going to change the topic real quick. And no, and, but you, but they can't get mad of me. They can't. No, that's a, no, that's a genuine mistake. That's genuine. No.

Starting point is 00:39:21 A genuine mistake. No malice. your heart. No, no, you know, now you're, it's like a band-aid over a shot. Let's just calm down. Let's calm down. You're putting some hydrogen peroxide over a severed limb. The damage is done, okay? Let's, let's calm down. Sorry, sorry, sorry. But what I was saying, what I was saying, oh, oh, I, the only, now this might get, but the only thing. No, no, Kim. No, I was just saying from, from planet of the apes, home. Yes. Yeah, because apes communicating which is it's impressive right that's for a different can i say something about that go for it

Starting point is 00:39:58 right apes well no i'm about say you as long as you let me talk no i'm saying because i'm saying as soon as i genuinely want to jump into a fun conversation with you're going to be careful racist white man colonizer ala that's funny okay look the people that train guerrillas right you know who's that white lady or she just passed away recently right the old white lady that like raised that gorilla to like talk oh i think so all that and do the sign language how do you get to that point no no seriously what like think about it and the you don't know the best part yeah these people are taking classes right yeah yeah that are made by other humans yeah with notes from humans yeah reading from a textbook of humans yeah and then once you do all

Starting point is 00:40:45 the humans you are officially a zoologist of gorillas yeah and i know that's obviously not how it works but I'm right there with you. I'm like, at what point, like, it's almost one of those things. You have to be in the field. They, like, I don't trust. If someone goes to SMU and studies apes for four years, it's like, I don't, I really don't care what you say about it.

Starting point is 00:41:10 I know your stats are right. All the theories are right, but it's like, you don't live with them. Yeah. Now, some of these people, they're really in, they're like, they're out there. They're in the field. They're in them cages. I'm not talking about.

Starting point is 00:41:21 the people that study the gorillas like monkeys i'm not talking about i'm talking about the people like that get these chimps or like these gorillas as a baby and they teach them how to speak sign language and teach him human things oh like if you've seen that one gorilla that she was literally just speaking to it and he was responding but through sign language yeah that's like but but at a certain point right what i don't know how true that is Or did they just teach it? You're so skeptical. I am skeptical peptic.

Starting point is 00:41:56 Very. But, right? How, like, I think, and I'm not trying to take away from her study because she seems like one of the nice white ladies, I'll make it nice milk rice. Oh, right? And she'll like, hey, you know, rub you. Yeah. She was one of the good ones and rest in peace if she's gone. But I know that's clapping.

Starting point is 00:42:16 It's clapping. It's clapping. But like rest, like, we do that. Like, if she was a good person. No one ever RIPs with a clap. No one ever goes, oh, rest in peace. You've never clapped at a funeral? You don't clap at a funeral?

Starting point is 00:42:28 If you had a good life, you deserve a standing ovation. Now, that's true, but this is getting cultural. No. Oh. Really? We sing hymns and cry. That's what we do. We sing hymns and cry, and then we eat some chicken salad, and everyone drives home.

Starting point is 00:42:42 Wait, y'all don't clap at funerals? No, at my coach in the sixth grade when he passed away, and the entire student body went to his funeral? Yeah. It wasn't more of a clap, but it was a celebration of life. Yes. Yeah. Right.

Starting point is 00:42:54 I still didn't clap. Right. We didn't go. Whoa. No, like you ever had somebody go up there that doesn't take death well and then they like just make a bunch of jokes? And it's the funniest person in the world because everybody said so you could literally say anything. We're going to laugh. Yes.

Starting point is 00:43:08 You've never been like, yeah. No. Like so and so. Remember that how they used to act when they got alcohol in them. Oh! You know what I mean? You've never clapped? Or like at the end of a funeral, right?

Starting point is 00:43:19 end of the funeral, show's over. It's not a show. It's not a, it's, this isn't a ticketed event. It's not a show. You don't think I'm, if you paid money to go to somebody's funeral, they are con artists.

Starting point is 00:43:31 If you pay, if you, you paid a general admission ticket to go view the dead. No, no, no, no. But let me tell you something. And I'm putting this on camera, play this at my funeral. If Payton Harden, God forbid,

Starting point is 00:43:43 dies young, right? Whoa. I'm just saying, if it happens, let's get this on record. there's no free admission y'all are paying to get in there you're paying to get in there no no it's going it's going to my parents right oh you're talking about soon no no i'm just saying if anything happens right y'all are paying admission to get in my funeral right

Starting point is 00:44:09 there's going to be no seating it's standing a room only because all the fans are allowed in like there's no like there's no special service for the friends and family it's fans and it's fans are all out. I would say hopefully the fans are like nice and let y'all get to the front, but at the end of the day, who cares? Right? Open bar. Open bar. We're lit. We're lit. Everybody's lit. Open bar. Y'all walk into there. I'm not there, right? You'll walk into the funeral home and normally like the body's there in the casket. I'm not there. Where's Payton? Oh, there's nothing there. Everybody's standing. There's a DJ. Everybody's like, right, open bar. People are getting drinks. People are cheers. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:44:50 Right. On the screen, you should know podcast on a loop, right? Just loop. Payton's greatest moments. Payton's dumbest moments. Payton's dumbest moments. You're dead and it's just like, no, no, no, animal. I'm like, no, fruit loops do that different flavor. Come on, come on. I don't believe it.

Starting point is 00:45:07 I don't believe it, dinosaurs. So that's on a loop, right? Everybody's, look, where's Payton? Where's Payton? Lights drop. It's dark. It's like the Undertakers coming up. And the best part is everybody's just standing. There's not even seats for them to be, and everyone's like, whoa, what the f***? Right?

Starting point is 00:45:26 Thore Slap shut, lock. And then boom, smoke machine. And y'all know my dying wish is what? To get taxidermy. I'm getting wheeled out action position to the abyss by the weekend. While the weekend is descending, doing a halftime performance, we have ABLE Tespe on the stage rocking the mic as Peyton is coming down the aisle of death. It's in the front stage. You're like, yeah, and then you get up there.

Starting point is 00:45:54 And then you hear, you hear Faintly from the distance, Pierce Listener. And now, he goes, welcome to the stage. Uncle B. Oh, oh my God, dude. Oh my God, it's a do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. And now, he goes, Dallas, Texas! For the last time! Yeah, and I'm getting, I'm getting wheeled out by my favorite bottle girls.

Starting point is 00:46:29 Oh, man. There's a collection of 15 of my favorite bottle girls. Willing up. And in my hands, they have the little light. Oh, my God, you're literally like this, and they're just going. Oh, my dude, that bitch would be. That's what I want my funeral to be. What's the point of being sad? You know what I mean?

Starting point is 00:46:52 Oh my god, dude. Yes, and then every week you can still do the pod just happen. Oh, no. I'm like, no, no, no. I'm like, my week was good, buddy. You're sitting like this. And I go, yeah, it's been real sad without you here, man. What do you think?

Starting point is 00:47:12 You're just holding it. I go, you know, I did. You know, I did, to honor you, I actually tried, I actually tried new fruit loops and, you know, I couldn't distinguish. They all wore one flavor. And you're just holding it. Oh, that's morbid.

Starting point is 00:47:30 Y'all even change the logo to me like, like my side of the logo's like, dude, that would be. Oh man, and I'm selling merch at my funeral. Oh my god, y'all are gonna get rich. My funeral. And I thought you said it's going to your parents. Well, yeah, but we get cuts? Well, no, look.

Starting point is 00:47:46 For the people that can make it, we're going to live stream it on Kuala Royalty. Patreon.com slash usual podcast, Qualil Royalty LiveStream only. Qualilat Royalty LiveStream number 184. It's at my funeral. Robbie's trying to lob me. Oh, my God. We put a mic on you simply for celebratory measures. Right.

Starting point is 00:48:06 Halfway through the service beach here. Now, see. Too far. I took it too far. We're passing out shots of Don Julio at your funeral. There's ghost machines and sparklers and bottle girls bringing the dead to the stage to perform with Abel and I take it too far. We're selling merch and tickets. First off, where is this going to be at?

Starting point is 00:48:34 We got to have a big venue. Oh, yeah. Jerry's World. Oh, no, I can't sell it AT&T. We do Frilew also Blues. We do a two, we do a... Oh my God, would you back to that night? Two sold-down nights at House of Blues Dallas.

Starting point is 00:48:52 Paine's funeral, part one, part two. Y'all change my outfits. Okay, it's getting dark. It is. CJ didn't like any of that. CJ didn't like any of that. It's so funny. That is, that is.

Starting point is 00:49:06 I'm joking, guys. Let's all pray for me. Oh, perfect. My snack came. Thank you, Rob. Oh, God. That's perfect timing, too. You getting snacks during the podcast? I got your one.

Starting point is 00:49:24 I can't eat that. You have to, just for me. Just for what, and not... What is happening? No, it's just a... Go for it. It was a great story. It took a lot out of me.

Starting point is 00:49:36 What is this? Do we have a Taco Bell sponsor I don't know about? No. It's just a taco real quick. I'm not eating this. What? You won't even take one bite with me? No.

Starting point is 00:49:45 Okay. Okay, but they did something to it. They did something to it. The Doritos Locos? It's a special bite. Wait, wait, wait for me and cheers. Just want, you just have to go on my- What is happening?

Starting point is 00:49:54 Just wait, we're just taking a taco. Is it my birthday? It's not your birthday, Bubba. That's February. No, just, I'll explain. Did we hit like a million subscribers and I don't know about it? No, is this celebratory?

Starting point is 00:50:05 Just a taco. Cheers. I mean, what the fuck? Oh, I mean, what the fuck? We could have taken a lunch break. You want another? are you okay I'm great I mean record time on that I mean absolute record taco time I mean I would put you against anybody to throw to taco like that like you are the

Starting point is 00:51:05 joey chestnut of Taco Bell I mean like genuinely is your wife not feeding you at home like a dude like what's we had chicken bar last night so you're full that was on a full belly you're crying no don't look at my fingers now the fingers are an insecure you have the fingers of like a four year old no yeah it looks like I made homemade ravioli like I mean I just wanted to allow you to attempt of the pastest to eat a taco. I just wanted you to be here in case I broke the record. I tried. I tried. I think you need to go to vacation. That was it. You want to race? After seeing that? Oh, you know you're coming in second. Cam, I'm not even in a competition. Your mind can go further than you think. Kim, I can't do that. Sure. Yeah. Do you want me to?

Starting point is 00:52:13 It's up to you if you want to race. I got another taco in this bag. I'll do it. I don't know if I can eat another one that coin. I don't really know if I can just slam it. I really don't want to. Like honestly, honestly, that was disgusting to watch. No, and I'm sorry about, visually, I didn't plan, didn't really practice too much visually.

Starting point is 00:52:32 If you can get this down, if you can get this down, in sub four seconds, I'll give you $500 cash. Now here, now here's very important details and caveats. Swallow it all, nothing in the mouth. That's not going to have. you can't that was close wasn't all in my mouth and four i can give you that there's no way there's no way all right how much how much 10 seconds oh no with even like 20 i mean it's to swap i i'd literally have i'd probably tear something in my throat i mean you are like i mean it's it's there but i mean you look like when you're eating that i've seen my dog like get after a piece of chicken

Starting point is 00:53:08 that was up there with it i mean you and absolutely just left a mess on the ground too i'll get to that I promise. You want to race? If you're challenging me. I'm challenging you. I mean, that was impressive, but Daddy's got a big throat. Daddy does have a big throat. Oh, dude.

Starting point is 00:53:23 I'm going to get my calories for the day. Oh, it's good. I'm not going to swallow it, but I'll solve it. I'll lick it a couple times. That sounds like my ex. Come on, hurry up. Let's go. You're only going to lick it?

Starting point is 00:53:40 Yeah. No, I'll try. Here we go. Now here we go. Are you going to give an honest effort? I'm going to give an honest effort. And five, four. Hey, best of luck, man. Two, one, go.

Starting point is 00:54:12 Y'all know the real throat goat is. Stop playing with me. Child's play out here. Child's play. I don't want to feel left out. I mean, absolute child's play. Oh, I almost threw up just now. Like, the end of that, that hit a part of my throat that you haven't hit since we're in roommates together. Like, that was, that was back deep depths of my throat.

Starting point is 00:54:41 depths of my throat those are the back hallways yeah I think you had all of that in your mouth in about one and a half seconds yeah you know I mean that's in the most impressive thing you've ever seen stop playing with me like genuinely stop playing with me and your fat tongue is finally being put to use yeah outside of the bedroom that that my friend now I will say I went a tad bit slower on round two yeah that wasn't yeah no there's no way you can compete with me That was insane. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:55:13 I need a drink of water at this. My mouth is so soft and I need drink. Me too. The You Should Know Podcast. This episode of You Should Know Podcast is brought to you by Cayman Jack, America's number one Margarita. Pete, now I know we've said it before, but like honestly, just dial in with me. Dialed, Camin Jack brings the margarita taste that you, Paid and Hard, know from your favorite beach to wherever you are.

Starting point is 00:55:41 are no mixing no fuss dude it's made with real blue agave nectar and lime juice it's the premium margarita flavored experience that fits right in your hand cracking into a cam and jack is a transformative experience you're right it is it transports you to your margarita state of mind i wish i was there right now i might just crack this right now i wish i was there it's kim guess what what it's available in a variety of flavors it's your ticket to the margarita state of mind perfect for days you're by the pool house parties are just hanging with your crew no seriously Like, if we crack this in right now, there's no way you can't tell me I'm not on a beach with my toes in the sand with listening to the seagulls. Oh, my God, I feel like I'm just at the beach.

Starting point is 00:56:19 You know, I got tagged with somebody at the beach, and they got a Cayman Jack, and they told me they're in their margarita, state of mind. Cracking your margarita, state of mind, pick up Cayman Jack at your local store or visit caminjack.com to find it near you. Please, please, please, drink responsibly. Premium malt beverage with natural flavors, American Vintage Beverage Co. Illinois's. Thank you, Kamen. Jack, on to the rest of this episode, huh? That was a wicked, strange thing that y'all brought up. Yeah, that was, I don't know why, I don't know which y'all planned on. That's what, you could tell, it's a K-Robbing camp thing. Bigbacks unite, we're bringing food at Tuesday night, we're bringing tacos, we're slamming it's

Starting point is 00:57:03 sub five seconds. Like, that is not something I would bring up. You know what I mean? Oh, but it's something you put down. Oh, I, absolutely. We're not going to, we're not going to glaze over the fact that you made the podium. You took gold. Oh, I'm top five all time. I'm top five all time. You put their throat to work. Oh, yeah.

Starting point is 00:57:18 You think the messages from the men have been bad before. I'll show you my requested after today. I'm not going to lie. My requested DMs, I'm never looking at my DM. I'm done kind of looking at the internet because y'all are starting to scare me.

Starting point is 00:57:31 Like, there's people saying like, like, we've known each other for five years or so and I've never met. Yeah, I actually have no clue. Like, people are saying like, I love you, thank you for doing this for me today. I've never seen you before. I've done anything for you.

Starting point is 00:57:42 It's really starting to scare me. Like, so I'm staying out of my DMs. But can I say my number one requested DMs is like from men? And, like, ladies, I get it. Men are, like, horned up. Oh, like TCU horn frogs. Oh, TCU horned frogs, horned to. I mean, the things that they have requested for me.

Starting point is 00:58:04 Oh, my God. If you, now, this is the thing, right? you a lot of y'all a lot of y'all I'll be honest there's a lot of there's a lot of minimum IDMs that request things

Starting point is 00:58:18 for me and they're saying they'll pay me y'all got to be better than that because I'll do it if you pay me up front if y'all send me the money initially I'll take it and I will give you your service I will polish these feet up for you

Starting point is 00:58:31 is it bad I don't think you would I think you would I think you would take the money delete the conversation Peyton, dude, okay, if you want my feet, that's your fault. Like, sorry, but I will give you my feet. I will give you my feet. Oh, yeah. Dude, some of these dudes are saying they'll give me top dollar for some feet.

Starting point is 00:58:48 Someone offered to buy those teeth off of me and my mom. Yeah, that is, I mean, that is, like, what are we doing? People offered 10K for my draws. Somebody offered me $10,000 for my draws. I will give you every pair of draws I've ever worn. You never should have told me that. I'm literally going to sneak into your home. I'm gonna sneak into your house.

Starting point is 00:59:07 And take my draws? And I'm not even taking the draws. I just need your phone. I'm taking the phone, accepting the deal, sending him my wiring information. He's like, why does you say, Cameron Kennedy? But I don't worry. Hey, hey, don't worry.

Starting point is 00:59:18 Says one thing about me. I have pride, but I'm not a fool. And then you send me the money up front, you have my haines. My skims are yours. That's what's... I would... It's the easiest $10,000 I've ever made.

Starting point is 00:59:30 I'd go buy four more packs of underwear. Wear all of them for 30 minutes and give you a double. shipment. Hey, you just got a bogo. You bought one and got one free. One better. I will, I will fly to you and hand them to them. These are my draws, sir. Here, here, Paul.

Starting point is 00:59:44 Paul, here's your, and a lot of y'all got. Do you take your current draws off in front of Paul, hand of those? That's the last pair. No, no, that's too much. That's $20,000. You go $10,000. $10,000. $20,000. $20,000. You already purchased. You get a 50% off. $15,000. I'm not going to lie. Dude.

Starting point is 00:59:58 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I like this. Oh, my God. Let's go down the list. Stop. Tell me when there's something you wouldn't give up for $10,000. So this, every scenario, everything I'm about to say. Yeah. Is in a DM, a requested DM from a fan. They're offering you 10 bands for these items. Okay, let's go. Okay. Okay, you have my underwear. 10,000 dollars, you have my underwear. Okay. I can. There's a $10,000 cash? All your hats. 10,000? Yes, you can have them.

Starting point is 01:00:25 Okay. You think I would say no to my has, but yes to my underwear? You should have started in a different order. Oh, no, your hats are more sacred than your underwear. Your underwear stink. Oh, dude, yeah. Can I say that? Oh, oh. The store, oh, well, go ahead. Now, you got to, you got to get me. They might get it with context, please. Both pair of my shorts that you have.

Starting point is 01:00:46 Oh, my sexy time shorts? Have not returned to me for obvious reasons. Okay, so if y'all don't know, I think I've said this on Patreon, because Patreon, we'd say the real, real, like the real naughty things over there, I steal cam shorts and I use them for sexy time. Like, those are my dick appointment shorts.

Starting point is 01:01:01 Yes, two pair of my shorts that were daily rotations that are now DA exclusive shorts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you know, if you see me in those shorts, I'm getting nasty. Either with myself. Oh my God. With my significant other.

Starting point is 01:01:14 Oh my God. There's a lot of me in those shorts. There's a lot. There is, there's, I mean, there's millions of little Peyton, Hardin Jr. Oh, but you can't have those shorts for $10,000. That's a $50,000 short. Oh, so that's the line? Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:01:26 Okay, okay. Anything weakened inside your house? Yes. Tour merch? Yes. Vinyl? Yes. Poster.

Starting point is 01:01:34 Kim, the only thing. I'm saying if he to 10,000 is my butt. So you can say all these material things. The only thing I'm if you, I will give you a kiss for $10,000. Cause you are in the mouth. Okay, a selfie in front of the mirror, mirror, a selfie in front of the mirror

Starting point is 01:01:46 lotion up holding your nipples. And see, now we're getting into his back. See how he starts, see how he loves this topic? No, I don't. Hey, back to back, we got Cam's two favorite things. Food and a lot of weird raunchy. It's Cam's favorite combo. It's Cam's favorite combo.

Starting point is 01:02:00 And I mean, Malachi's gonna have a hard time in high school reviewing this tape. Like, it's gonna have a hard time. gonna be bad and i'm sorry but i've i've been you know now that 30 million people on the internet have heard me say i have a relationship right via that viral ticot so you know now that the now that the united states 7.5 is when we're recording this right okay speaking of relationships i saw this article headline right oh god and now this is what he reads and since you're in a relationship what was that sound that's crazy no no it's crazy stop it's crazy that's crazy i thought that's the

Starting point is 01:02:48 road you were no after this 99 year old man found out his 96 year old wife cheated on him over 60 years ago, he initiated a divorce immediately. That's insane work. Where do you stand on that? So this man is 99 years old. His wife is 96 years old. He found out that 60 years ago, his wife cheated on him. He got a divorce immediately at 99 years old. He's tripping. He's tripping. He's tripping. Really? That f*** was almost a century old. All he does, wake up, cup of Folgers. Okay. Maybe some solitaire, watches some bulldozing videos, and he's back to bed for his new nap. So you plan on being with live till you're 99, right? Yes. God bless you. First of all, I believe that's too

Starting point is 01:03:41 long for a relationship. That's, that's me. That's just me. My parents have been together for 40 years. It's too long. It's not too long. You've got to go talk to other people. There's no, no such thing as that much love. That's just you're being content at that point. You have a catast. Look. Okay. So you plan on being with live till you're 99. Yes. I mean, if I get to 99. Right. But yes. So say you're 99 years old.

Starting point is 01:03:59 Live comes up to you one day. Cameron! Cameron! What do you want, you? Haffa! That's what I say. It's like, you remember Peyton? Now, that's different.

Starting point is 01:04:09 Oh, no. Now, that's different. That is, that is in every way, shape, and form different. I remember the Payton versus Cam Waltor. Yeah, you remember old Boston when we went that old Mexican restaurant? Yeah, that was a 90. you're saying if you mean when I was playing cards with Pierce so you're telling me at 99 years old if Liv came up to you and said hey I cheated on you with Peyton on y'all's world tour back in

Starting point is 01:04:42 2025 you would stay with her now that's different but yeah I would because you've probably been dead for 30 years at that point you're probably three decades gone Just in there, dusty and there's a maid that's like, oh my God, in your will, you set up a maid in her whole business to where it trickles down the line on a retainer in investments, and you connect it to their account, she's dusting you off weekly. She's dusting your tax everybody off weekly. That's your job, that's your job, you're my care caregiver. I would say with her. That's insane. I'm 99 years old.

Starting point is 01:05:19 I'm not going to leave my literal soulmate. It's not your soulmate. if she was getting with somebody during your tour. I mean, that's true. Exactly. If I found out in person, yeah, you're both done. And then I come over, hey! Oh, no, I'd go to your grave and be like, you motherf-fri-old.

Starting point is 01:05:38 I'd be like, what the hell? No, I probably can't even move. Yeah. I'm not, there's no way to leave here. That's insane. I think he's the most noble guy, because he is a man of principle, right? I don't care when you did it. If I found, okay, how long have you been with Liv?

Starting point is 01:05:52 for eight years you've been with your wife for almost 10 years right yes a lot different than 60 let's say she she comes up to you now hey the first week we we started dating I cheated on you are you staying with her you have a kid

Starting point is 01:06:05 the first week seven days into our relationship yes but y'all said we're exclusive we're dating I'd probably stay with her I'd probably stay with her that echo that was gorgeous I'd probably say with her no way really That was seven.

Starting point is 01:06:23 We were together for seven days. Cameron. We were together for seven. But it's about the principal. Okay. Okay. Just what that means. Okay.

Starting point is 01:06:33 The devil lies in the details. But look, but look. But that means that the goalpost can move because imagine, right, you're, how old are you not, 26, right? 27. Imagine when you're 85.

Starting point is 01:06:44 Yeah. And she says, I cheated on you when you were 27. That's right now. Yeah. So you would stay with her still? But you've been together for eight years. She says, whenever we were only together for eight years and I cheated.

Starting point is 01:06:56 You think in the year- And Liv wouldn't do this, we're just using it hypothetical. You think in the year 20-80, I'm going to be pressed enough to go, you lying, wow. And drive my, my robot. Yes, I bet Malachi, come pick me up to the robot lawyer and have it make me a robot PDS and divorce her. So when's the time from cheating to figuring out? that you need to leave. When does the cut, when is the cut off?

Starting point is 01:07:26 There's, the, that's a good question. I don't know if there's a dead set cutoff, but if even like, if we're in our 50s, right, we're in our 50s. And she's like, I used to cheat like heavily. First off, that's, first off, there's a, no, getting told, getting told, I used to cheat on you heavily.

Starting point is 01:07:41 One time. One time. Yeah, that conversation. I've had that conversation. It's not funny. Don't find back there. She's like, you want to see the video? Oh, man.

Starting point is 01:07:54 You were back. Oh, my God, oh my God. Get his . Oh my God, stop him. Stop his . Grab his cats. It's a slober knocker. Grab his fucking twisted.

Starting point is 01:08:08 I'm sorry. It's a slober knocker. It's Randy Arden. His soul. That was one of our last new chairs. You better turn that up when you said that. Turn it up and use subtitles. He said you got back with it.

Starting point is 01:08:26 Oh no, oh. And she did it again. Oh my God. I've done it again! Oh no, oh, oh, the chair. Oh the chair, right on the head. The chair on the head. Oh, she only kissed the upper hand.

Starting point is 01:08:49 Oh my God, oh my God, you weak. Oh my God, it's a $25 IKEA chair. I think I locked my knee up. Oh, no, no, I'm not. This is okay. Dude, this is sad. It's all about sad. Oh, what a callback. Oh my God, it's all about sounds for it. Sounds are the king.

Starting point is 01:09:33 Dude, that hurt. They're bad. Oh my God, sounds make it break it. You really said, it was like one little snap. I hope they're able to see it. I don't think they were able to. Oh, okay. Oh, that's crazy. When is the cutoff? Just give me an answer. We can move on. When is the cutoff? Like from, leading to knowing, how many years have to go by? I think I can give you the opposite answer. Oh, I would love being your girlfriend. Oh, my God.

Starting point is 01:09:55 No, I think I can tell you. I'll hold a lie for a while. If this happens, first off, there is a difference between you had a thing or it was like hookup. One mistake is cheating. Cheating is cheating. Cheating is a mistake. No, not a mistake.

Starting point is 01:10:08 I mean, I agree with you. Cheating is deliberate. I agree with you guy, huh? But I'm saying 60 years removed. If you told me you had a second life and I didn't know, oh yeah, I had this guy, I dated him four years back in our thirties. That hurts. Oh, I went to one thing, and this one guy, we've...

Starting point is 01:10:26 And he rizzed me up. He rizzed me up, and while you're at home... And we got dirty, nasty, and a porter potty. Oh, man. If you thought it was a... Ranking, rankin. Come here, give me a kiss. No, I'm just kidding.

Starting point is 01:10:36 Ooh, he tastes good. Stop. I don't do that, too. No, I can't give you a cutoff. No, you have to. I give you the opposite. I give you the opposite. I give the opposite.

Starting point is 01:10:43 If it happens within a recency... Yeah. Like, honestly, now, like, like, eight years. And I know you said on the first week, that's the only reason. If Liv said in Arkansas, she cheated on me, I'm done. No, you're not. I don't believe that. I don't believe that.

Starting point is 01:10:57 Yes, I am. I don't believe that. That's three, four years. Why do you think I was flying Arkansas, Cam? You think I loved Russellville? You can't keep doing that. And the guy didn't say his 96-year-old bones and bitter wife cheated with his best friend. Yeah, I know, but I know, Cam, I know you really are leaning on that.

Starting point is 01:11:14 That's why that chair is in your bedroom. So I had to give you something that I know you care about. I don't think. I really don't think you're grasping how far out 60 years is. I don't care. Your parents, think about that. Your parents have been married for 40. They've been married for 30.

Starting point is 01:11:27 Or together for 40. Together for 40, yeah. At another, at another you. At another year, your lifetime. Now that's 65, 66 years. Yeah, I would need to know. That is a long time. If that man, my wife cheated on me with is still alive, we're done.

Starting point is 01:11:42 If he's dead, fine. That's my thing. You know what I mean? If he's if he's alive, no, because he still has a chance to hit it. It's just like this. He's just like, oh, oh, oh. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, no, I think if it happens within 10 years with a, a, a realistic age.

Starting point is 01:12:16 think if i'm 99 bro i don't give off i hopefully have 20 great grandchildren running around what how many kids you plan on having it well i mean well i don't know maybe maybe three or four do you think malachi knows me yeah i think he gets confused sometimes i mean he might get confused yeah it's when i wear my sunglasses he's like this but i take him off he's like well that's sunglasses because he's like why is you wearing sunglasses inside and you go you say the line nope Okay. That's a good topic I had to just bring up. That is wicked.

Starting point is 01:12:50 Like, I commend him at the same time he's tripping. He's a man of principal because that's not okay. That makes me think our whole relationship was a lie. That's what makes me feel. I'm not saying it is. Yeah. I wouldn't feel like that. I know you'll sit in there.

Starting point is 01:13:05 No, I'm not. Dude again. I'm not sitting there in the corner. Let me watch. No. She likes him when you do that. No, no. John, flipper.

Starting point is 01:13:14 You got to flip her around. John I mean you're gonna do it at least hit the right buttons oh man this episode is brought to you by shop g l d cam there's always been a problem with finding high quality and affordable jewelry options that are available let's say it was super hard but gld is great because of the high quality at all price Points. Look, I'm rocking some GLD, all right? Now, tell me that thing ain't blinging. That thing blinging shining and shaking. Bling bling. But honestly, guys, don't just take our word for it. GLD has over 2 million customers with 50,000 five-star reviews. Worned by stars like Justin Bieber, Micah Parsons, Malik neighbors, Kevin Durant, ASAP, Rocky, and many, many more. GLD stands by the quality of their jewelry. Every single piece comes with a lifetime

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Starting point is 01:14:55 that after you purchase they will ask you where you heard about them guys please please please support our show and tell them that the you should know podcast sent you 50% off and a free chain absolutely nuts you better go to shop gLD right now and on to the rest of the episode but yeah we got medicate you yeah no it's bad your son has it bad too oh he and he's like this oh yeah he i mean it's it's beautiful watching him think though especially when he does his little eyebrows he'll see something new he goes you're like looks at it you got to stop showing him that show you don't say what showed it's got stop showing him that guy is going to jail whoever that guy is on that tv that i see every week at your house he's going to jail he got to stop showing my nephew him

Starting point is 01:15:37 i have the greatest thing ever to show you after this by the way that hairline is not i oh god that's that's not of the lord no no that's not not of the church. That's not of a free man. That is not a man that has morals. Oh my God. And the other character, the other one that does what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've talked about this episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's a little scary. Yeah. Anyway, here we go. With the video. What video? The video with 80 million views that we were talking about that service. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So with that video that you were talking about of you getting hit on and how we were talking about, you remembered it different because of emotions and stuff. It made me think of it.

Starting point is 01:16:14 Remember how I asked you about socials? But we went on something else. Remember how I said, did you ever have socials in the fifth or sixth grade? Oh, yes. Yeah, do you remember that now? I do remember that. That was like yesterday.

Starting point is 01:16:24 He's a superpower, I'm telling you. So, well, I mean, if you harness it. If you harness it. But we had a social, it's like a dance, whatever the hell. There's literally the gym's open, you can play in the gym or you can dance. That's literally it.

Starting point is 01:16:36 And we're at this social, sixth grade. And I end up talking to this group of girls. Very new thing for me for sixth grade. You don't believe it already. No, I know. No, no, you say that so much. You say that so much about your younger years, bro. No, you didn't.

Starting point is 01:16:51 No, you did not. You have to understand. I'm not spitting game. I'm literally probably like, no, no, no, you sacrifice your two monsters. Then you bring out Blue Eyes White Dragon. Like, go watch the Payton versus Cam World Tour on Patreon. Go buy it. And look at the kid pictures of Cam and tell me that's the guy that was talking to women.

Starting point is 01:17:07 No, I'm not sitting there. Oh, Stacey, what you do? I'm just talking to girls. I'm having girlfriends. Yeah. Not to kiss or to date, but just literally friends that are female. Yeah. So I'm talking to these girls, and it was a moment presented itself.

Starting point is 01:17:21 I can now be cooler by lying. Everyone crosses that. Oh, yeah, I love that. So I do it, right? Still do that sometimes. Now, the context of the conversation was, did I go to this thing with my friend name Andres? Okay. Okay.

Starting point is 01:17:37 I literally, not only do I lie, I did not go. I go, hell yeah, I went. I start giving details, everything. Out of the corner of my eye, Andreas pops up and goes, he didn't go with me. Right in front of the girls. And so it made me think, like, you remembered your story one way. And this is one of those moments. I lied, said, oh, yeah, dude, me and Andreas went to that.

Starting point is 01:18:01 It was so cool. Like, this one thing popped out, and, like, we were there. We ate food afterwards. Andreas himself, presents himself. Yeah. Hijacks my conversation with these lovely ladies. And Lily goes, dude, he didn't go. He's lying.

Starting point is 01:18:12 to you. In that moment, I was baffled at the cockblock by Andreas, baffled at my lack of social awareness as if I was pierced listener. I had no clue he was summoning himself. And he did and ruined my night. And the worst part is, I didn't die on the sword. I didn't, dude, you're very bad. How do you not remember that? I literally went, yeah, I lied. And I just sat there and looked at it. I was just kidding. I lied about that. That's your fault. It's my fault. Like who, who, First of all, how close for you in Andres? I mean, I stayed the night. Once?

Starting point is 01:18:47 Literally one time. With a group of other people? And his parents scarred me. Why? Because we woke up, they were making pancakes and they said, do you want turtle in your pancake? And I went, oh, that's funny. They're like, no, seriously, we put turtle shell in our pancakes.

Starting point is 01:18:58 Like, we shave it down and put in the pancakes. No, they don't. No, they don't. But they're clearly, like, to them, they're all joking. Oh, ha ha. It was so convincing to me. I said, I want to go home. Call my mom.

Starting point is 01:19:11 I don't have a phone yet. call my mother. You eat turtles. Andreas, I'm getting out of your house. Like, I know, and I slept on the floor. I slept on the floor of this kid's room. And that's the guy you wanted to lie with? I wake up and I'm eating turtle. No, get me out of here. Lisa, where are you?

Starting point is 01:19:24 Yeah, it was bad. But no. But as a kid, you got to be smarter than that. First of all, you have to construct with the person. Like, hey, I was with you. What if he didn't want? Apparently, he didn't want me flying on his name. Yeah. I don't think Andreas never liked me.

Starting point is 01:19:35 No, I was he never liked me. Were you with a group of friends where you stayed over the house? No, just me and him. Oh, weird. Weird. Yeah. Were your parents friends? No.

Starting point is 01:19:45 You liked Andreas. You liked Andreas. No, you liked them. No, no. We were cool, but like- Oh yeah, real cool. I think you liked Andreas. It was one of those friendships.

Starting point is 01:19:54 We were really cool as like kids, like young-ins. And then about this time, like, it's not like something happened, but it was just like, he was with the other group, I was with this group and it just went. Yeah, cool kids, camp kids. Yeah, 100%. Like fat kids that play Yu-Gi-Yoas and all the cool, like, sleek kids. Yeah, yeah. And this is not a bit.

Starting point is 01:20:11 I'm not trying to make a bit right now. If you saw me feeling around in my pocket, there is, like, not a bit, 100%. I was feeling around in my pocket, and there is genuinely Revlon, color, stray, skin awaken, 24-hour, 5-1 concealer in my pocket right now.

Starting point is 01:20:31 And it is mine. I'm trying to put, it is mine. Conceal? Yeah. Yeah, I wear a concealer sometimes. Oh, my God. I do makeup. The fourth one.

Starting point is 01:20:41 wall has been broken. Did I wear makeup? Why do you wear it? Oh, it's cover up pimples. There you go. There you go. I meant to bring it today, but I didn't, I, to wear it today, but I just put it. No, you brought it.

Starting point is 01:20:51 You know, it's here. I go, Mr. Success, you brought it. Yeah. No. Oh, say. Never mind. It's too, it's too explosatory. You were going to call it.

Starting point is 01:20:59 You're going to call it. Say it. You love explosive. You remember, no. Say it, yeah, say it. Go, go, God. This is a reaming episode. This is unbelievable.

Starting point is 01:21:07 I throw it a taco. We made fun of the death. Come on, come on. I didn't make fun of the death. Don't put that on me. I'm kidding. I love the deaf. Come on, I love the deaf too.

Starting point is 01:21:15 My grandma's deaf. I'm like, I saw Memo this weekend. How was she? She was great. She fell asleep, middle of the party. No, I'm not kidding. As a kid, right? Oh, here we go.

Starting point is 01:21:24 As a kid, I was exploratory. I wanted to explore. Like, I was trying to find myself, figure out what I did it and didn't like, right? Yeah. And my parents created a great environment for me to learn myself. Yeah. Right? And I remember, I was just when I was starting my YouTube career in the sixth grade.

Starting point is 01:21:38 Right? No, please stop. I'm, I don't, please stop. I've always been a YouTube kid. Like, I've had a YouTube channel since I was six years old. Yeah. One of my YouTube channels was movie reviews. Mm-hmm.

Starting point is 01:21:49 One of my YouTube channels was dying Nike Elite Sox. Oh. No. One of my YouTube channels was dying. No, dying Nike Elite socks. The other one. You just make videos. They're like 20 seconds.

Starting point is 01:22:04 You just pop up and go, we'll see you all good next one. this week video you're just like one of them was a skit channel and then and i'm being honest and like it no no no no we're are we friends i love are we friends no i will literally never come back on this podcast we're past friends another one was a makeup channel but now now now i'm here right and and i never realized like i wasn't good at it like i knew i wasn't good at it but i don't think it was because I didn't know how to do the makeup because I watched tutorials. It was because I used my mom's makeup and she's darker than me. Right? And so the and so no. No. No. And I'm here. And I feel like I'm back in middle school. And so, but then I took, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You have to finish. No, no. You have to finish. No, no, no. You have to finish. No, no.

Starting point is 01:23:07 No, but no, but it got too far because I took her clothes to, and that's when it got too far. No, that's what it got far. That's when it got too far. She was like, you're reminding me of Ed Gein, and I was like, okay, I'm not going to wear your skin, mom. Quick question. Yeah. Who are the titles of people? I didn't, no, I never uploaded it.

Starting point is 01:23:26 So they were just in my photo booth on my laptop. No, no, it's not, that's, that's, that's, no. You took your mother's a cloth. I took her clothes, and she, dude, and I never could fit into those boots. I bet you, I bet you Preston could. Hey, can I say, though, till this day is a 26-year-old man, the sundress is the most comfortable garment I've ever worn. Oh, my God, it's a good guard, dude, no.

Starting point is 01:24:00 And it helps with the poke. Oh, it does help with the poke. Lives Moomoo's rock. Oh, dude, yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. I just put my mom's heels on. and then go sit past her at the Ford Explore

Starting point is 01:24:09 just for to pull in the garage. Yes. So we've all worn our mom's clothes. Now, no, no, never did clothes. Never did close. The heels are just kind of out. My parents let me explore, right? And I saw it in my...

Starting point is 01:24:21 No, no, no, no. That's too far of a joke. That's too part of a joke. No, no, no, no, no. And the problem is, never mind. No, no, there's going too far. We'll talk about it on. No, we'll talk about it on Patreon.

Starting point is 01:24:34 That's not, I'm not saying that for free. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. No, it's really bothering me that I can't say it. Hey, we hit the time. Can we go? We good? CJ, we good on time?

Starting point is 01:24:44 We can get out of here. All right, Cam, get us out of here. I can just imagine you with the darkest of blush on. Dude, just, like, I was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God, you're so lucky we weren't kids, like, right now. Oh, my God. If you had just immediate access to instant gratification of TikTok and posting clips, you'd be in a mirror with Twitter.

Starting point is 01:25:06 with Troy Palomalu hair crooked teeth putting on like dark-skinned nice makeups wearing your mother's garments and you would post them talking about we'll see you all again next week fellas and I would have I'd ate

Starting point is 01:25:21 I'd have had a line in Mac right now called the Peyton line and I'd be wearing a sundress sundress and then we would have promoted in all the deaf schools Ah, come on! No, it's a joke, no, no. You know it.

Starting point is 01:25:42 Oh, that's whatever, dude. I don't, I don't know, man. Oh my God! Leave me alone in public. Stop deemming. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. All right.

Starting point is 01:25:53 Oh, no, come on. Get us out. Get us out. No, can, please. No, please. No. You boil. It's good.

Starting point is 01:26:02 You boil. It's good. No, no, no. tell my mom to keep in the wrapping paper talking stuff the bra. Let's go. All right. All right. Let's go. Let's go. In the episode. In the episode. I don't want to be here anymore. In the episode. In the episode. I don't know. Somebody end the episode. I'm trying. All right, everyone. We love. We absolutely love each and everyone. What do you think? You come back. Episode 187. And honestly, it's okay. It's 2025. And if y'all judge me, it's not okay to judge people. It's not okay. I don't care if you

Starting point is 01:26:33 don't like me i'm i i think it's okay to accept and it's okay for you to explore and find find out what you do and don't like it's okay get us out stop i'm trying stop talking no don't clip it either now if you clip it we're done we love each every single one you think you come we'll move to a patreon only podcast oh back to 187 episode you show podcast oh oh that top that top link in the description it has always is the patreon the koala club go please god go check that this week and watch No one's making eye contact with me anymore. Like, no one respects me anymore. I'm still.

Starting point is 01:27:09 Please go to the extended for this week. CJ, you live with me. Please watch 187 extended. We will be questioning it more about this. Cairf, give me a hug. I absolutely love each every single one of you. Thank you for coming back. Now, Pierce has hate in this heart right now.

Starting point is 01:27:24 Peers like this. I knew I shouldn't like this. I don't know. We, we love you. Don't forget the confusing. the casuals, get your good karma. I never wore her underwear. I never did, so I know, I know a lot of our thing,

Starting point is 01:27:37 I never did that. But this week's, this week's seat left. I didn't do it. Look at those boots, look at them. Boots. Now Pierce left. This week's secret code, PWM, Payton wears makeup.

Starting point is 01:27:51 Not anymore. Oh, I do still. Yeah, it's in my, no, but that's for, no, that's not for, it's a different art form. We love you so, but it's okay. That boys wear me, it's okay. It's fine. It's fine.

Starting point is 01:28:03 One out of ten clawberries don't make it home to Christmas and I might not either. We'll see you next time. Not too far, we'll go. See y'all. See y'all. No, yeah. No, it's in his pocket. It's concealing.

Starting point is 01:28:14 Okay, guys, don't look at me. Wait, guys, come back. Don't look at me.

You Should Know Podcast - ADDRESSING THE VIDEO! -You Should Know Podcast-

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