You Should Know Podcast - ATTACKED ON HALLOWEEN! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: October 28, 2024

FLORIDA HURRICAN HELP: https://www.redcross.org WATCH LIVE SHOW HERE: https://www.patreon.com/YouShouldKnowPodcast/shop/you-should-know-podcast-live-show-full-484210?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=productshare_creator&utm_content=join_link (IF YOU HAVE ISSUES BUYING, LEAVE THE APP AND USE WEB BROWSER) EXCLUSIVE LIVE SHOW MERCH: https://you-should-know-podcast-shop.fourthwall.com PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/YouShouldKnowPodcast FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/people/You-Should-Know-Podcast/61552092953106/ NEW TWITCH CHANNEL: https://m.twitch.tv/peytonhardin/home Peyton’s Polaroids: https://instagram.com/peytonpolaroids?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== TRUE VAULT ESCAPADES: https://youtube.com/@AtomicWolf54 0:00 HALLOWEEN EPISODE 1:53 MANSCAPED 3:17 CAM JOINS! 5:34 Comparing Our Nips 8:58 Embarrassing Halloween Party! 11:48 Worst Trick or Treat Ever?! 15:44 Halloween Pet Peeves 17:19 Almost Arrested On Halloween 22:34 What’s My Kissable Spots? 25:28 “What does it mean” Google Search 28:24 Sending Friends NASTY Pics 30:38 Kissing With Your Eyes Open 36:50 Sleeping With BUGS 38:11 Questioning Shower Curtains 39:25 Fear Of Closing Eyes In Shower 41:33 Peyton Yells At YSK FAMILY 43:15 FART SPRAY PRANK 49:25 SKIMS 50:49 WORST INJURY EVER! 54:43 Cam Pee’d Himself 56:41 Peyton Used Cams Tongue Scraper 1:03:38 The Moon Can’t Be Real 1:05:24 WHAT ARE EMOTIONS?! 1:10:35 Bandaids in My Pocket 1:11:37 DRAFTKINGS 1:13:04 HALLOWEEN QUIZ! 1:21:53 Spirits Watching us Make Love 1:23:00 What’s The Default Pizza? 1:27:27 DR.P (CAUGHT GF AT A PARTY) 1:38:07 ANNOUNCEMENTS Todays Sponsors: MANSCAPED: https://www.manscaped.com SKIMS: https://skims.com (TELL THEM YSK SENT YOU) DRAFTKINGS: https://www.draftkings.com (USE CODE YSK) YouShouldKnow P.O. BOX 191564 2825 Oak Lawn Ave Dallas, Texas 75219 FOLLOW PEYTON: https://instagram.com/psh8?igshid=ZDg1NjBiNjg= JOIN THE DISCORD: https://discord.gg/V5WYhSte2R Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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At Starbucks, we serve cold coffee just the way you like it. That refreshing chill of ice. That rich, smooth taste you crave. That handcrafted care every time. Your summer ritual is ready at Starbucks. The You Should Know Podcast. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to You Should Know Podcast,

episode 136, the Halloween episode. Round of applause, hey everybody welcome back to the ishino podcast episode 136 if you are new here or if you haven't already and you look below you see that subscribe button isn't pressed you're wrong if you look even more below then you see that comment section isn't fulfilled with your name, guess what? Even more wrong. Go ahead and fill that out. Get your good karma. This is the third installment of a YSK Halloween.

We hope that you're all wearing costumes with us. If you're not, go ahead and get in your closet and put one on. We got Editor CJ as a baby. Look at that. We got Mama Liv as a cowboy, a pregnant cowboy. And we got little baby Woobie as a pumpkin. We love Halloween over here at YSK. And we have a merch drop coming for y'all on Black Friday.

If you want a sneak peek at that whenever it comes, make sure you join the Patreon. Make sure you're joining us on Facebook. A lot more content is coming up on there soon. Discord, the watch party. If you want to have people to talk about the Usain Bolt podcast with the Discord is perfect for that. And then Twitch streams are coming back up.

We're about to have a fun, rambunctious time here for the Halloween episode. We love y'all. We love the Halloween episode. We love y'all. We love y'all. We love y'all so much. And we're on the road to one million subscribers. So make sure you share this podcast with everybody you love. Now on to the rest of the episode. A well-marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue? A well-marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue that was carefully selected by an Instacart shopper and delivered to your door.

A well-marbled ribeye you ordered without even leaving the kiddie pool. Whatever groceries your summer calls for, Instacart has you covered. Download the Instacart app and enjoy $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart. Grocer groceries that over-deliver. I'm Mermaid Man, but I need my Barnacle Boy! Barnacle Boy! We got co-host Cam, a.k.a. Barnacle Boy, back in the studio.

You look... Throw a water bottle at him. Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, unite! Wow. Wow. Cam, I'm essentially wearing underwear. I'm not going to lie. I think in the time that you've put this costume on, since we got in the studio, I've seen

your lower region, your extremities, and your sack of coins four times. No, honest to God, I went to go pee in this. I almost got arrested. The security guard said, who are you? What are you doing? I said, hey, just trust me, man, it'll all be worth it. Give me about an hour and a half, and I'll get back to being regular. He goes, if I see you again, I'm putting you in cuffs.

And I went, you know what? I can hold my piss. I'll hold it. The thing about your costume, right, there's two things. There's two things. One, I am supremely and utterly surprised that that cap is still on your head. No, I kind of wedged it down deep because it couldn't fit over my actual head. I just kind of stuck it.

It's like what I had to do with this with my graduation caps. It's not going anywhere. It's not going I had to do with this with my graduation caps. Oh, it's not going anywhere. It's not going anywhere. It is wedged into my flesh. Second thing, looking you in the eyes is terrifying. Look at the camera, deadpan in the eyes. That is a scary sight. Yeah.

You know what's more scary? Go ahead. Let's talk about your skimpy little bra and let's's talk about your crooked-ass star. Okay, your star is absolutely deformed, and I can't see your nose, and it makes me wonder if it's even there. Like, I know it's there, but it's hidden, and I see a lot of teeth, a lot of gums,

so that's kind of frightening. No, I have good gums. Your velvet seashells that are covering your areolas and your areolas only are so skimpy and small it is unbelievable and that m is huge oh you don't like my areolas oh i love your areolas but i hate them when they're covered by by velvet sea shells i'm not gonna lie okay there was a girl in high school right she had velvet no no no she was talking about my nips. Oh. And I took my shirt off in front of her, right? We were at a pool party, which is very surprising for me.

You were at a party. They were in the pool. You were just like, I'm not going to rub your feet either. So I was staying outside the pool, and much of us were. We're staying outside the pool while everybody else, y'all, were in the pool having fun. Okay. Diving and drowning each other like ah this is so fun right and so there's this girl that i was there you know those vibes whenever you're trying to like court a girl and everything's exciting she's never seen you shirtless yeah and so i tried to do the oh my god ruby was drinking out of cj's bottle talk

oh my god so so um i was trying to do the movie-esque thing of like slowly revealing my my my body right and she was like into it okay up to like she was into it into it into it into it until the shirt got above my nipples and i cut the shirt over my head and i took it off and i flung it i went like this and flung it uh-huh her face like changed like it's like everything sunk and she goes oh and i said oh what oh what and she goes you have really little nipples do you think i got a little you have penny nipples no i think your nipples are great like a small little abe lincoln sitting on your chest you used to call them chocolate chip nips yeah i used i used to get ridiculed for about six years of my adolescence and i was called invisinips i don't think that was just adolescence brother

because i'm still invisible in college that's the first thing i noticed about you but i got them in adolescence not the nipples i had those since birth i got them making fun of i don't know it was i think it's same shit we had a pool one day and i was like dude i'm totally down to like swim you know it's in my blood it's my dna yeah and they went what the and i was like what they go where's your nipples i go they're right here and they go no why are they translucent and i was like uh i? And they go, where's your nipples? I go, they're right here. And they go, no, no, why are they translucent? And I was like, uh, I don't know. So we both have strange nipples, apparently. There was a guy in high school, he had one nipple right in the middle, swear to you.

We had a guy that had three nipples. Swear to you. He had two OGs and one right in the middle. Do you think they could feel that? I think his turned out to be some form of cancer, though. And it was like a, they thought it was a nipple. My grandma had cancer. It was cancer.

I think he got it chopped off. Skin cancer. I think they took a real one and left it in the middle. I'm just kidding. Yeah, we're starting off hot. What's up? Oh my God, speaking of starting off hot, and this is very hot slash very not. First off, hot, I'm sweating like a son of a bitch.

Yeah, you're sweating like. Your jaws are huge! What the f***? Do that again? They didn't look that big. You could fit you and me in there. What the hell? Would you like to? We could try. I would love that. We'd have to go pole to pole or hole to hole. Which would you prefer? Pole to pole. No, I wouldn't want to take your dignity like that. You know, not want to take your dignity like that. You know, not all of us are blessed in that.

I'm just kidding. Back to the hot or not. And in the spirit of Halloween. First off, Mermaid Man, you're gorgeous. You are too. You look amazing. Barnacle Boy, I'm trying my best. You look like a crooked chef.

I look like, no, I look like an anime burglar. That's what I look like. I'm like, give me your cards. But we're fighting crime in Bik excuse me excuse me i'm so sorry this takes me back to so you've already heard my horror story where i went to the party and they're the parents for halloween with your ex no no no this is like this is like okay this is like seventh grade and they were doing uh the skimpy games and they play with the ouija and, and I said, I'm out of here. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, the next year, same friend group, okay?

But this time, he said, party's going to be so different. It's just a real Halloween party. It is a costume party. Right. I said, I'm game, okay? Yeah. Hey, Mom, can I use your card? I got to go get an outfit.

I show up to this party. This is eighth grade. Yeah. Eighth grade, Halloween, everything's good. Of course, boys like girls, girls are liking boys. That's the vibe, right? And girls are liking girls, and boys are liking boys. And course, boys like girls, girls are liking boys. That's the vibe, right? And girls are liking girls and boys are liking boys. And girls are liking boys and boys are liking boys.

Everybody likes everybody. Everyone, but I'm saying they're trying for someone else, right? Yes. I was trying for me, myself, and I, okay? Okay. And I didn't get the cue. Oh, no. Oh, if you can only guess, then yeah.

Oh, no. So I go to Walmart, right? Let me get some of that fake blood. Let me get a hairy wolf mask. I said, let me buy some of those cargo pants. I go as a wolf, a werewolf, a man transformed to werewolf. I put brown marker on me to make dirt marks. I had dried blood all over my stuff.

I fully committed. I show up. Guys are just shirtless. Talk about they're a lifeguard. Girls are in skimpy little cat outfits. Yeah, they're bunnies. Everyone's sexy, and I'm over here. Oh!

And everyone else is just taking shots of fireball. I'm sipping out of a Great Value water bottle, sweating my dick off in a full burlap jumpsuit as a werewolf while other people are making out behind the house. I was a girl repellent. I just didn't catch the cues. What was your initial feeling when you walked into that party and you saw you weren't with the same dress? I was about to leave. I literally was like, this isn't for me. They were like, who the fuck is this? I was like, it's me. I was like, it's Cam. I'm here, brother. They were like, who the fuck is this? And I was like, it's me. I was like, it's Cam. I'm here, brother.

Like, what the hell? I'm talking guys were lifeguards. Guys were construction workers. They had the vest, no shit. Firemen. Everyone's just showing off their adolescent six-packs before any. I was just chubby and dressed as a wolf. No nipples.

I smelt like ass. I had translucent nipples. And I literally had blood from head to toe And I thought I was killing the game Dude that's so funny Other people left getting their first kiss Getting their first kiss with a new girl I left trying a f***ing candied apple for the first time

And that was the highlight of my night I think that's why people liked you though I think it is Because you were so green Yeah you just didn't care about anything You weren't with the social norms at all At all They were like hey bring some to the potluck they're bringing liquor little chasers i'm like here's a meatloaf i'm like y'all ready to party lisa made it it's great i eat it every wednesday

oh my god bro do you have any like i have some weird halloween stories too oh my god can you please tell me i've told them um on them on previous Halloween episodes how my neighbor that got raided by the FBI, he was selling edibles to kids. Right. We're not selling them. He was genuinely just giving them away. That's so bad. Check your kids' candies.

Check your kids' candy. Honestly, F the story. Did your mom let you eat the candy you trick-or-treated in? She made me dump it in the living room floor. Yeah. let you eat the candy you trick-or-treated in she made me dump it in the living room floor yeah and then i my ocd i decided to like organize it like chocolate's here it's candy's here it was a bit much but i'm a little strange yeah but she would look at scan through it she never let me eat the gold coins never once i never got to eat a gold wait why not the gold coins because they always looked flimsy wrapper and it could be something else that could be an edible it could be so it

could be laced i I don't know. It's too easy to infiltrate. Yeah. It's too easy to infiltrate. She let me eat name brand chocolates that were clearly sealed and in the gummies. I barely got to trick or treat, dog. You're saying all these stories. I didn't get that experience.

Your mom didn't let you trick or treat? I went like once or twice. No. One time, I wore a yellow morph suit, I told you, and you saw my little cashew out, and I was trying to impress everybody because I thought I was packing something, and I was running around the park. So that was that, but it was nighttime, so no one saw me. They were like, who's the yellow guy running across? What's up with this pit?

But I remember my mom, one year, she was like, you can go trick-or-treating. And I went, and she was with me, and she had it on her. Oh, my God. And so imagine, I'm a kid, right? I'm trying to, like, enjoy Halloween. Enjoy it. Get in the spirit. Trick or treat.

I've never done this before. I'm 14. You go home a sophomore and have a chemistry test. We get off fall break. No, I'm just saying, like, I was old. Like, I didn't get to experience that as a kid. My mom wasn't having that. And so she went with me.

She was like, you can go trick or treat. I'm going with you. And I said, all right. So my mom would hand in her purse like this as i'm going to her houses she's like she's like go knock on that door you just hear that you're like mom you ready she's like i've been ready p knock on that door see who's answering that door go ahead and give it a good ring give that bell a good old work you're like mom put it down the guy opens she's like get out of my son's face oh and then dog dad that's what we had to do is we would we would um we'd get the candy and then i wanted to go to the rich neighborhoods but she was like i ain't driving out there and so i so i

just had to stay here when there was like these fun sized little candies oh yeah and so i remember i got a bunch of them and then me and preston had them and we were so excited we dumped on the floor and she was like okay look at them and so we'd be looking at the candy she put in the trash bag and then she would take it to like a shelter and she'd be like somebody else ain't got no halloween i'm like wait so you're scared we can't eat it because it's laced but you're giving it to the orphans like the orphans can get this razor blade are you kidding me i'm just kidding my mom's gonna be so okay that reminded me that reminded me uh one year so you know first off r.i.p dusty that was that was my that was my like first pet in my family my mom's like baby all that he's gone now but dead for every halloween he's dead yeah he died. He's dead. Every Halloween, dead dog. But every Halloween, he would be dressed up as something.

And my mom would pass out the candy. And this was the point where I was old enough to where I didn't trick-or-treat anymore. It was still cool to go with friends in high school and stuff. But it was like that first year, I was like, man, I'm not going, right? So ringing the doorbell all night. We're going, getting the candy and stuff. And one time, she opens the door. It's the little kids.

And Dusty just runs out. And you know Lisa doesn't play. Oh, freak out. Lisa drops the bowl of candy, moves the kids to clean out of the way. Our front door's wide open. She knocks a four-year-old into our grass. She's like, oh, my God, get my dog. Get out of my way.

Knocks a four-year-old over. Candy falls to the ground. Dusty's just like, just running. She sc scoops him she's like oh oh and the other parents like what the woman you knocked my kid over and i'm just standing in the doorway like okay what's the appropriate age to trick-or-treat to or no not the appropriate age what's the appropriate time to start trick-or-treating because i understand right there's these families and they got little babies right yes and they dress them up as little princesses and some of your kids outfits are shit dude let me say that like spend some money or don't dress them i'm just kidding no literally it's like yeah it's like take the paper bag off of timmy's skull dog it's not a

good you're embarrassing your son well okay i okay. I just remember. You're not going to like those pictures looking back on it. I remember that, like, at my neighborhood, at, like, 4 p.m., there would be kids at my door. That is excessive as shit. Boy, my parents would be hot, dog. They'd be like, hey, we just got off of work. I just got chewed out by my superiors, and you want a Twix? You want me to give you a Reese's cup right now, your ugly little kid? The sun's out.

There's still cars coming in the neighborhood. Yeah. No, I would say if there had to be a universal time, the itty-bitties get to go first. 100%. That's clear. That's safe. The light is still out.

I'd say like 5.30, hitting 6. It's orange outside. At least orange. Yeah. There's no way someone should be knocking doors for candy when it's yellow. I see clouds. I shouldn't see clouds. No shot.

I'd say, I'd even go up. Maybe 6 to 6.30 should be your itty-bitties. Slowly followed by your 8 to 9-year-olds hitting about 7, 7.15 and just keeps going. That's oddly specific. 7.30 to about 7.42, you got your 8th and 9th graders. And then the rest of the night's for the heathens. That's why they're going for a couple pieces of candy. They're getting their sugar high.

And then they're going into Johnny's apple tree. Speaking of heathens, I told the story last year how we used to egg people on Halloween. We'd freeze eggs. You'd freeze them? Yeah, and we'd just knock people. Yeah, that hurt. I remember we were older kids, right? And we weren't in the trick-or-treating, but we knew Halloween was the thug day.

For the old dude. That's where you just act out. Everybody's outside. Just gooning. You get, I forgot. I forgot. I really did. Here it is outside.

So that's not making it. That's how you get a visit and a pizza from chris hansen right there that's how that happens goodness don't do that on halloween please say that for thanksgiving at least everybody's inside me huh i remember one year it was like we're at the tail end of high school. We were like juniors and seniors. And this is when I realized, like, I'm not about it. No. Like, I'm not about certain shit.

Good. I drew the line of eggs. Like, it hit people in the legs, whatever. It was fun. Cool. No one's really hurt. Yeah. Well.

But maybe. How hard do you throw? I remember this year, we were with this group. It was our group, right? And they were like, hey, this Halloween, it's our last Halloween before college. We're never going to have this hometown Halloween again. Oh, my God. And they're like, we're going all out.

And I was like, more eggs. We're buying them by the baker's dozen. Go get all the boxes. They had rocks, dog. I remember they had a sack of rocks, a walmart sack of rocks and i remember i was like okay i don't know what's going on and i was walking with them right we would drive we would park and we'd walk a little bit to get away from the car and they would find parking lots i remember i got there we pulled to the parking lot i'm not sure what we're doing i'm kind of playing

the bag so i was like i don't know what's going on i see one dude go and throw it at a car window throw a rock at a car window it shatters it goes happy halloween bitch and i'm like oh god no you go i am a i am a victim right now i was lied to yeah i thought we were throwing poultry eggs yeah and so i remember and i went home and then i ran home right i literally ran i I was nervous. I'm running home. And you know in my yard, there's that little hole for the electrical stuff. Yes. And there's a hole in the grass, but you can't see it.

I'm running, scared as hell. They threw a rock at a car. I step in the hole. My leg goes. And I tell you, instantly, there is a bruise like this size on my on my leg. And imagine having to explain that to my mom. Yeah. She's like, no.

She's like, where are they? Who kicked you in the leg? And so I had to leave the part out where I saw somebody vandalize a vehicle. That's a felony. Yeah, 100%. And then I said, why are you running? And I was like, ah, too many scary costumes. Yeah, I was petrified. I went to a hole. Big bruise. Love you, felony. Yeah, 100%. And then I showed up. Why are you running? And I was like, ah, too many scary costumes. Yeah, I was petrified.

Went to a hole. Big bruise. Love you, Mom. Yeah. Holy shit. No, Halloween was a special time. Okay, I don't know why this triggered. I think this was around Halloween, too.

I went with my friends, me, Sanjan, and another friend. Right. Shout out to Sanjan. Shout out to Sanjan. But the other friend had an older brother and his friends. And, you know, at that that age it was always cool. Was there need to grip that like it was your last drink? You haven't drank in two weeks.

Oh my God. Yeah, it was almost there. Love Red Bull though. So love Red Bull. So we're hanging out with our friend and his older brother and his friends. Okay. This was Halloween weekend because everyone was dressed up, but we didn't participate. He goes, hey, we're going to go poop dollar someone.

I go, excuse me? What is that? You said fecal matter. Poop dollar. He goes, yeah. You never poop dollar? It's a currency of shit. A hundred percent.

Literally. He had his beagle. He gave his beagle. He put milk in the water bowl. Had the beagle drink milk. Went outside. The dog poop milk in the water bowl had the beagle drink milk went outside the dog pooped in the lawn he scoops it with a ladle puts it in a brown paper bag takes it in his car we are now listening to mid-2000s rap music on the way to a walmart we park in the Walmart. He puts on a latex glove, grabs said dog shit, wraps a $1 bill around it, sets it in front of Walmart, and we pull and park in the handicapped

parking spot. And he goes, now we wait. And we're looking there. A man comes out, goes for the dollar, grabs it, realizes he's holding dog shit, freaks out. My friend's older brother peels out, you've been poop-dollared, bitch! Suck it! And we drive off. And I immediately said, I want to go home. I said, I don't belong here.

This isn't my cup of tea. I'm out. Dude, is it evil of me that I think that's a fantastic prank? Oh, that's pretty good. Like, that's so damn good. For $1, you're wrapping it in dog shit? I go, Ruby, start getting the muscles working. Start getting that stomach curing.

She is knocked, bro. Oh, she is asleep. She's so cute. Hey, Janet. Okay, but I have a thing with you, right? I have a question with you. Okay. And this is weird, and like I said, I do love women.

I promise you. No, I know I said that already, but I swear. What are we doing? Okay. What are we doing? Okay. You should never have. Now, you're rubbing your knees like you're nervous, talking to a therapist, telling your darkest secret.

It's not really a secret, but I do. i do love women yeah stop touching yourself but okay so i was i was looking at your instagram last night oh no okay wait a minute my bro hoops it just knows when it's time i was looking at your instagram last night right and i was like he's a good looking chap i like your profile picture a? And I was like, he's a good-looking chap. I like your profile picture a lot because it looks like you got cheek injections. What? Your cheeks are so prominent. That's one of my favorite pictures of you.

Okay. I like this. And so I don't know what it was, but I kind of dozed off, and another daydream kind of happened. And it was like me smooching this part of your cheek right here this is my favorite part of you you had a daydream this wasn't even night it was nighttime but i was like a drift off i wasn't fully asleep so you you stalked my page to find a good photograph which then you sedated yourself to go to sleep so you could dream and smooch me no it was just like you were asking for it though you went like oh no i wasn't no you did you went like this and

you you prompted me with that party and you smiled and when you smile that part goes up it's really nice did i smell good did i let you kiss me yeah no you literally gave yourself like you're giddy bro relax you gave yourself oh i gave you gave myself up. You literally went like this. Because that's what you wanted, you freak. Yeah, but you gave it to me. Because you asked for it. You can ask for anything. But I ask that question, like, what's, because to me, your cheek is the most kissable part of you.

So what's, like, on me? Like, what's your favorite? Like, what's your favorite? Like, what could you kiss? Are you dead-ass serious asking me what I think your most kissable part is? It's Halloween. We can be whoever we want to be. What the f*** does that mean? It's Halloween! We can be whoever we want to be.

Why didn't you ask me what my favorite candy is, you creep? Talking about what would you want kissed on me. I'd probably go your forehead. I'd probably go your forehead. I'd probably have to. your forehead your forehead or your neck where your neck meets your trap love my head cuz that's that was a bit much wait why my forehead I've never got coming on my forehead it's just nice you can see don't do that with your eyes I made it really unnice it's you don't have wrinkles you're not old like me in the head and you always have a nice line like a good a good crisp line up there

yeah like i might kiss where brooks gives you enhancements get some of that black ink on me take it to go i'd say that or your small nipples she said dad stop all right in the spirit of Halloween, right? So the other day I was going for a simple Google search. And this scares me. This honestly scares me. Okay?

I like spooky scares. And I'm going to break it down to you, but it kind of concerns me a bit. Okay? I'm simply going to search, what does it mean if your car, okay? What does it mean if your car audio doesn't work? Well, they a new car i'm trying to look that up right all i could get in the search bar was what does it mean about 15 results pop up oh god and when i tell you that we need to pray more for people out there bro the search results that pop up for when I simply say, what does it mean? I just want you to listen to this.

Okay, so what does it mean? This is what pops up in Google when you type in, what does it mean? I'm sorry. What does it mean if my? Okay, what does it mean if my? This is what pops up in Google. I was going for, what does it mean if my CarPlay isn't syncing? Okay.

I saw, what does it mean if my poop is green? Okay. Oh, mine's always green. That's disgusting. Get it checked's always green that's disgusting get it checked no that's normal green poop that's healthy poop healthy what are you eating grass no it's i have some shades of green i'm talking your your spanks and your gloves yeah i got a corn fed if you're shitting turquoise we need to get no green not turquoise okay next one what if my poop what does it mean if my poop is black? I haven't had tar shit. That's

not good. I've never shat out rubber, okay? What does it mean if my pee is cloudy? What does that mean? Your piss is cloudy. That's if you do too many drugs, I think. That's gotta be- Wait, hold on. We gotta explore some of these. You can't just skip through these like this. Oh my god, there's so many, and a lot of them are about poop. about poop okay okay what does it mean if my pee is cloudy when that has to be drug induced right no that has to be you you are on narcotics 100 what does it mean if my glucose is high that's an honest question honestly don't know what glucose is okay well that's what's in corn syrup glucose is your sugar levels yeah glucose corn syrup i remember in science class, Miss Wingate, she told us about glucose corn syrup. And she was like, you got to check if that's glucose corn syrup.

Glucose corn syrup. Okay, what does it mean if my poop floats? Okay, you ever have floaters? I don't look. That's the thing with me. You don't look at your shit. Never. So, what?

No, no, not long enough. Sometimes I'll actually. thing with me you don't look at your shit never so what no no not long enough sometimes i'll ask you're bold enough to sit here and and burn me at the stake for not looking at the white i'll look at the white but you don't look at the product no that's too much that's disgusting like honestly i i know people doctors and shit in the comments are gonna be like you gotta see if you see if you got thorns in it or something i don't know know what the point is. Thorns? Sometimes it feels like there's thorns. What are you eating? Wood chips?

What do you mean thorns? What the? Thorns. Or like toys or metal or something. I don't know. Whatever you eat. I'm just saying I can't. And let me expose something real quick.

It is with the people of the You Should Know Podcast team. This is an in-house problem that I'm going to address online. Okay. team right this is an in-house problem that i'm going to address online okay cam cj ryan um k-rob live they send each other pictures of their number twos and they literally compare it they're like this was a long one today this was a this was a this was a test that is just bro that is so weird to me y'all have no home training okay it means we have enough confidence and trust in the other person you crooked star bastard that's what it means we're showing off yeah fix your little bra we're showing off our poops as an achievement

like an accolade that's not an achievement that's disgusting and then they'll literally be in group messages and on like whenever they had snapchat like back in like college they would be in group messages, and whenever they had Snapchat, like back in college, they would be in group messages, and they would just send pictures of each other's fecals. And then they tried to put me into this game, and I said, hey, bro, I swear to God, I will never speak to any of y'all again if I receive a picture of that. See, that's heartless. That's bullshit. Why don't you just take one for the squad and do the game? A picture of your poop is a test of loyalty? Hey, I never really wanted to play Among Us, right?

When it came out, it ends, it was a great time. I had to take that leap of faith. What is your gain from looking at people's poo, dog? Because then you look at yours and you go, hey, mine was better than his. Let me send it back. I think that's a kink. It's like a pat on the back. Best poop to date, Kevin Howard.

Those were f***ing monsters, bro. He was dropping off, like, loaves of bread. See, bro, that's not even, that's just, it's like I'm not having fun, bro. That's gross. Okay, I'm sorry. That's disgusting. What does it mean if my eye keeps twitching? You don't get enough sleep.

That's what that means? Yes. Yeah. You don't get enough sleep. Because I used to have a twitchy eye problem. We're on two different spectrums. You said not enough sleep. She said too much caffeine.

Well, if you have too much caffeine, you're not going to get enough sleep. Oh, my God. God bless you. I see you, Dr. Seuss. I see you, Barnacle Boy. Last one. What does it mean if my period blood is brown i don't know if i want to i don't know if we can or we should get involved in that uh we have a woman on the thing she said it means it's old

you can have old let me let me not so when you go to look up at your car audio system you see the problems of the world on google so be weary what you're searching you want to know you want to know a problem of the world that i have let's hear it i was i was kissing the other day i was having a good smooch and i haven't had a smooch in a long time just call me no yeah like i said whenever i dreamed of your kiss it was aggressive and mean. It wasn't loving. Yeah. It wasn't loving.

But I was having a good smooch, right? That's good. And it was the first smooch I've had in a long time. And it was a good smooch. A lot of tongue. I love a good tongue-y smooch. Like, I want to know what you ate two days ago based off your taste buds, right? Let me get in that molars. Let me go get your leftovers out of that molar let me get let me turn my tongue into a floss and i've said and i've and

i've said this before right but i'm really gonna double down on this oh i think it is stranger to keep your eyes closed during a kiss no then to have them open no dude it is like okay how because you're ted bundy if you keep them open what why i don't have a good imagination she's sitting here grabbing your frisky little jaw with all that rough hair that scruff yeah a couple sins from the backside if she's just giving her all right she's loyal she's intimate she's vulnerable she's in the moment and if she ever just took a peek and she sees this. Okay. What are you, Conor McGregor?

Relax. Okay, do you kiss people that you're attracted to? I kiss one. Okay, yes. But would you ever kiss somebody you're not attracted to? No. Exactly. So if I'm attracted to you, I want to see what you look like with your tongue in my neck.

Hey, and her tongue's already down your mouth trying to get the little hold works. Doing some rounds on that punching bag back there. You've already, you're close enough. You don't need to watch her do that. No, but you look pretty while you're doing it. I want to look at you. And I'm not, like I said, I'm not bug-eyed staring at you. But I'm definitely peeking at you.

And I want to see your jaw move up and down. I'd say you see with your hands the forbidden fruits of the village. Who did I just turn into? What the f*** was that? I just became like a monk. What did I just say? I just spoke in tongues. What is that? I don't know, but it was kind of hot. I told you,

see? See? Learn a thing or two. There we go. Okay. Let me teach you. So you close your eyes, but then your eyes become your fingertips, okay? That's how you get around the course. That's how you get around the course. That's how you get around the course. I can't see what she looks like through my hands. But no, but you're going to feel.

What am I, a Millie Earhart? Oh no, that's Helen Keller. They're like, you're on the left. We can keep it if you want. Yeah. Let's do it. Okay. It's Halloween.

You take your Ojos, you put them in your fingies. Okay. So's do it. We're here. It's Halloween. You take your Ojos. You put them in your fingies. Okay. So you're just closed, right? Come on. Work with me. No, no. Work with me.

Okay. Come on. Work with me. Lean in. Lean in. You're going to come smooch me. Not real, though, because you've got a lot of tongue. I don't know if I can man up to that.

Okay. So right here, right? You're looking, right? This isn't good. Now, if you're closed, if you went there and you're went there but on the back side you feel you go down the spine grab some hair oh feel a shoulder grab a heart no okay i'm talking about just seeing their face i'm attracted to faces like i love faces yeah faces are nice yeah okay so i want to see your. Let's call a spade a spade. Okay.

What, are you going to kiss your whole life? Yes. Oh. Genuinely, I enjoy kissing more than anything. That's my favorite. You're a good man. Okay, this is my debunking of your theory, right? Okay.

If it's weird to keep your eyes open during kissing, why is it not weird to keep your eyes open during coitus? Because, are you kidding me, son? Why do you keep your eyes open during coitus? Because, are you kidding me, son? Why do you keep your eyes open during coitus, then? You're joking. No, I'm dead ass. I'd rather close my eyes during coitus, maybe because I'm not proud of what I'm looking at.

If you close your eyes in coitus, you're going too hard, you're too in the moment, you're going to miss something. I got a broken broomstick. You got a broken broomstick. You got a broken broomstick. Mr. F***er. I'm just kidding. You can miss.

No. Something can get hurt. There's a lot of room for mistakes. No, that's an aggressive. I don't do aggressive. I'm 24 seconds and I'm slow. I'm a shot clock. A shot clock. I'm a shot clock. A shot clock. A shot clock.

That's nice. Okay, that's, come on. If you're clock. What? I just sat there and thought about it, bro. I can only imagine. Okay, this might be a bit much. TMI, let's put it in layman terms so we know and it's not too explicit.

What position are we in, right? Let's just assume i see okay i'm good how god created it i'm not going outside of it you're a deliverer of the word okay you're in that a man you're just sitting there eyes closed i think it's weirder to keep your eyes open during coitus than it is to keep your eyes open while kissing see but i feel like that might be the only applicable, the only applicable movement, the only applicable position for eyes closed. No, I'm just saying, I think it is strange to keep your eyes closed during a kiss. Bro, okay, first off, closed is more intimate, 100%. Think about surprise, bro.

Then why don't you keep your, but what's supposed to be more intimate, kissing or coitus? Coitus. So if it's more intimate, close your eyes during coitus. Because there's room for error. Stop being a jackrabbit. Make some love, dog. I'm not a jackrabbit.

Okay, I see your point on that. But kissing is not, that's not the end all be all. It is for me. That's just strange. That's just strange. What is that smell? What is that smell, bro? It's that. It is. Okay, see, I know what you that smell bro it's that it is it's okay see i know what

you're saying and i get it for the final the final step home run as some people say yeah but you probably like oh my god that's funny wait in in all these scenarios are you in your bed you're in your house yeah that's what it is you don't want to see your room that's why your eyes are closed your room's despicable no it's not oh my god but i keep them open during kisses no you okay you keep them open i really don't even have coitus i just kiss oh my god that's what it is you allow her to keep her eyes shut and you're like this okay she can't see that you're looking around oh my god peyton facetimed me the other night there's a dead moth on your bed frame

you're sleeping with bugs that's why you don't want her eyes open dog you're like hey just trust me you go like this I sleep with moths Peyton sleeps with moths okay what happened was oh there's no there's oh what happened was Cam was facetiming me right? And I was cleaning my room at this point. And so on my bed frame, I saw this little thing on top of my bed frame. And I was like, what is that? It's a creature, buddy. It's just a dead moth in its wings. And I said, bro, I am disgusting.

I live in the jungle. And the worst part is, I want you to think about this. That moth couldn't survive in your room. I didn't even kill it. So either the fumes of the atmosphere, the lack of food, or the poison of a water burger. Some of moths shouldn't eat. It literally killed it. It often.

And I found bug juice on my wall the other day. Because I killed one six months ago. But I think I was doing my sleep time medicine medicine and i don't remember really killing it but then i looked up there and i saw like a like a like a cockroach spine on my wall holy it was gooey and green oh my god no oh my you definitely should have went with just some salsa verde there's no way you should have told me i was a cockroach yeah and i could i do have a question about bathrooms. Oh, my God. Okay, I have a question about bathrooms.

You remember, you don't have these because you have a really nice, expensive house, but do you remember whenever you used to have, do you remember shower curtains? Yes. I definitely have shower curtains. Let's just make that known. You have glass. In my bathroom. Yeah.

Every other one has shower curtains. Oh. Yeah. Can't relate. Just kidding. No, he's Oh. Yeah. Can't relate. Just kidding. No, he's not. He's literally not kidding. Okay, go.

So shower curtains, right? Yes. There's something that has always, like, not made sense to me. You know whenever you close your shower curtain and the water is going, right? Yes. Why does the shower curtain go in? Does it suck into you? God, I hate it.

Someone bring me that science they said it's something with the vacuum of space and time when you're okay i'm not trying to be neil degrasse tyson here but apparently if it's something to do with the hot water it's drawing the thing apparently they said you got to get the inside wet and it'll stick i don't know but i hate it because it feels like someone's touching me when i'm bathing It's drawing the thing. Apparently they said you got to get the inside wet and it'll stick. I don't know, but I hate it because it feels like someone's touching me when I'm bathing. And oftentimes when I bathe, shampoo gets in my eyes and I have to close my eyes and I get quite scared. Dude, okay.

Is that what happened to you? No, I'm going to parlay into something with that. I have an irrational fear, and I still do as a 25-year-old man, of closing my eyes for too long in the shower. I swear to god and so i used to go six to seven months without washing my hair because i wouldn't like to have to do this and i would hear a creak and then i would like try to get it to be in my eyes and i'm burning and now and then nothing's there and so i'm deceited by my own angst like i have a crippling fear of closing my eyes for too long in the shower you gotta let that shit go you gotta let dog you're grown does it by yourself what's you're in your

house the doors are locked you're on the third floor you'd hear the stare no it's something cj got on me the other day because i was like bro lock my balcony door on my third floor your your balcony door yeah what is cat woman coming after you lock your balcony door i have this theory if people are want in enough they're gonna find a way you don't think ladders exist bro oh okay so you think burglars show up to the scene with a 26 foot stable double-sided ladder you don't think they could hey let's let's let's siege his place okay let's get to the top and get him in not everything everything is brick and mortar, like let's gorilla marketing this door in. There's stealthy burglars.

There's stealthy burglars out there. You think someone's going to climb a ladder in broad daylight? It's nighttime. Oh, so they're going to climb a 26-foot ladder. Yes. time oh so they're gonna climb a 26 foot ladder yes dark as shit outside to get to a balcony with wasp nests and weird stenches and you think that's the more probable than kicking your front door in if they want me if they've studied me and they found out the layout of my house and they're like we know he's in there we're gonna climb this floor i have though mute that but i do oh my god oh my god you need to listen to me okay

you need to stop watching films okay you're fine everything's gonna be fine and it's all good okay you don't have enemies and villains aren't out to get you don't have a turf war with falcons no birds are gonna come through none of that it's all good okay yeah and we have shit fans too let me say that we have shit fans because that video that episode where i talked about how my fear of ostriches yes you know how many damn ostrich videos i got sent oh yeah that week oh i can only imagine and it was like there was a viral ostrich video that you went viral that same week i talked about it of a bunch of parents took their kids on a field trip and they were like on the back of this trailer and there was like

ostriches behind this gate the ostriches broke loose and the kids were like in the grass like in this pen right the ostrich broke loose and they were running around charging these little kids and i literally watched these kids right get the get the same trauma and PTSD that I have. And I was like, I know what you're experiencing. That's bad. That, like, defenseless fear of these seven-foot... Of a huge winged creature. Seven-foot hell birds that are coming after you

and spitting on you, bro. It's not like... You know what I mean? I don't. I seriously don't. I'm not going to lie, though. When you put it like that, bro, an ostrich would be absolutely terrifying. They're the worst.

To run from because they're fast as shit. 40 miles per hour, bro. 40? 40. 40 to 45. They're fast as hell. 40 miles an hour? They are fast as hell.

CJ, Google it if you think I'm lying. 40. And they're 6'7". That's what I'm saying. They can run as fast as Usain Google it if you think I'm lying. 40. And they're 6'7". That's what I'm saying, dude. They can run as fast as Usain Bolt and they're our size, bro. That's faster than Usain. And they spit. They can run like a RAV4.

40? 43. Wait, look at you. Tell me the weight. How much do they weigh? That's like Derrick Henry. Give him another foot. Google the fastest...

Google the fastest ostrich of all time. Google the fastest ostrich of all time. Find the goat ostrich. Find the greatest ostrich to ever live. Holy shit. I'm telling you, they're disgustingly fast. You might be converting me. I told you.

I did not know that. I just thought they were big and ran. I didn you, they're disgustingly fast. You might be converting me. I told you. I did not know that. I just thought they were big and ran. I didn't know they were moving at 40. Does Ruby have a pulse? Dude, something reeks. It's on. It's over here with me. You smell something bad?

What? You stink. Hold on. Don't read that, CJ. Bro, holy shit. Some... Oh, my God. What?

Oh my goodness, what is that? What? What is that? I don't smell anything, bro. You don't smell that? No. It smells horrible! No.

Are you f***ing kidding me? Is there food behind your couch? Food, my asshole? That is, like, awful. Let me see. How do you... I don't smell it. I don't smell it, bro.

What the f*** do you mean? I don't know. I cannot smell this. Ah! No, what is... Damn. Bro, it's my... I think it's the mic.

No. No, what is it? I don't smell anything, Cam. She's over there gagging, too. No, I'm laughing. Cam, there's no stench. None of us smell this. How are you not smelling this?

I don't smell anything. Your eyes are watering. Are you lying to me? Because I'm laughing at you. Am I having a stroke anything bro. I don't smell it. Cam. What is this bro? Cam. Oh my god. Cam.

Cam. What the is that? I'm not even kidding. What is that? Cam, dead ass, look at me. How do you not smell that? I don't smell anything. Your eyes are changed.

You're lying to me bro. I swear. No, oh my god. Dead ass, I don't smell it. No eyes are dead. You're lying to me, bro. I swear. No, I don't smell it. No, if that's coming from you, you need to leave, bro. If that can even come from a human being, what is that? Bro, did you put something rotten over here? I was asking you the question. I know. Did you shit your pants?

I don't think so. I'm not even joking. This is awful, bro. What is that? Do you smell it? She's gagging You're f***ing lying to me. CJ did you fart? Dude I'm not even f***ing kidding what is that? Check your thing check your costume. Check my costume. I'm sweating even worse. you know check your thing take your costume. Check your cross your sweating

Sweating even worse. I don't smell anything bro Bro, deadass. I don't smell it Now it's gone. There's no smell this whole time. That's you can't tell me what I was smelling No, you cannot smell over here. Don't come over response. If you can smell it. What the it's back What is that bro. What is that, bro? What is that? Wait. What is that, Peyton?

Cam! I'm sitting here! It smells like someone took a tire and set it on fire, bro. It smells like burnt f***ing rubber, dog. How are you not smelling that? I don't know. It's so funny because no one smells it. Bro, I think it's this...

It's a costume? Let me smell your costume. It's not, though. Let me see. No, it's not. What is it? Did you... Show me your hand right now.

No, pick it up. Did you just... Oh your hand right now. No, pick it up. Did you just... Oh my God! Stop! You are... You... You are a sinful man. You are a absolute...

It's the world's worst fart spray. Oh my goodness. No, stop. Stop spraying it. No, stop. Stop spraying it. Stop spraying it. Stop spraying it. Stop! Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh. Please stop.

Please quit it. Happy Halloween. It's just a little spooky spray. Hey. Oh, my God. Don't. Please, God. I don't know how you were faking it for so long.

That is rancid. Oh, my God. Dog, my stomach. rancid. Oh. Oh my f***ing dude. Oh my God. Dog, my stomach, my stomach's turning.

My stomach's horrible. Thank God it's short-lived. How many times did you spray that thing? So many.

Where the f*** was I looking? I kept trying to advert you over there to CJ to tell you to look at CJ. Bro, and i didn't even

hear it that last time i literally heard it bro i've been spraying it for like the past 20 minutes but it wasn't working oh my god you have to hold it upright and i was trying to spray it like this like on the low like this but it wasn't working dog i literally thought i was sweating so bad there was a stench i've never smelled i thought I was secreting a smell that I have never smelled in my... It's still here. Okay, deadass, what if I showed up to your wedding smelling like that? What would you... I'd tell you to leave.

There's no doubt about it. You would not be out there like that. You would have to go home or just go wait in the... Dude, it's still here. Okay, wait. What if whenever your son's born, he comes out smelling like that? Put his ass back. Put him back and let him bathe in that goo some more.

Or I tell Liv, you're on a water diet for two days. Don't eat anything because he reeks. Dude, let's take a break and air this bitch out. Oh my God. The You Should Know Podcast. Okay, we got the studio fumigated. I think the smell has cleared out fine and well. We got Miss Ruby.

Ruby. Oh, hi, Ruby. Oh, God, she's twitching. Oh, God. Oh, oh, oh. I think she loves you. Say hi to the people. I think you can make a natural outfit of those little ant alien things off Men in Black, Janet.

Oh, Ruby, you want to say something to the people? Tell them that you love Uncle P and why shouldn't... You should know about that. Huh? Oh, oh. Oh, she's on the microphone. Oh, she's... Oh.

All right, be free. Go. See you, girl. See you, chicken. Oh. She's going to lay here. Okay. All righty.

How are you feeling? How are you doing? Is your nose okay? My nose is fine. The studio's better. And that was unbelievable. Yeah, that was bad. The fact I did not see that

for however many sprays you sprayed at the beginning so many was utter nonsense yeah it was so many sprays bye ruby see you janet now she's gone forever walking straight through the wires okay little dog all right i thought of something the other day that i you not it is i have not thought of it for about five to ten years that's a long time i have to share it sure first off did you ever have any spooky injuries spooky injuries any spooky injuries broke all my fingers my collarbone my elbow hyperextended my knee six concussions broke my back none of those were like that's exciting okay we were talking the other day about uh sports and about just the fall in general and stuff like that.

Okay. And I remembered a story about my high school basketball coach getting injured. Oh, wow. When I say, it is, you got to bear with me. It is so funny, though. It sucks that it happened to someone. Okay. So he was working a track meet, right?

He was out in the field doing the field events. Shot put. And discus. So he's working out there. Someone events, shot put, and discus. So he's working out there. Someone throws the shot put, right? Are you familiar with shot put? The big ball. The big ball, heavy.

It's like a cannonball, literally. Yes. And they chunk it, okay? So his job, he was working the field. His job was to go clear it and then bring it off so the next guy can go. Exactly. He walks out there, picks up a shot put, clears it. Whoever was working the front said, all right, next person up.

You can go for it. Ooh. So this next kid gets up there, throws a shot put. Peyton S. Harden. When I tell you, my basketball coach, heavier set man. Yeah. He grabs the thing. He's walking off.

A shot put comes from the sky and drills him on the inside of the leg. He immediately falls to the ground in agony and pain. He had to go to the hospital. They took him on an ambulance straight to the ER. He shows up, and this is on a Friday, so we didn't see him Saturday or Sunday. He shows up Monday, of course, for work, coaching, everything, at basketball practice. Before we go out, he's talking to me's talking to me I'm like coach what's that on your leg he then tells me the story he goes oh take a look he pulls his shorts Peyton it was a bruise about this

it looked like oh my god like a black widow it was oh my god big he said he was pissing blood and I said dog no way he got hit with a shot. I mean that could literally, if that was shot out of a cannon, that could like, bro, I mean that's like a literal cannonball almost. It's just a lead ball. Hit him dead in the leg later in that practice, the same day. He's pain, he's walking around

limping and stuff, right? We're doing a drill. He hits his classic, he would always hit this for whatever reason. Okay, a little weird little squat. Sand squat. A weird little squat where he's resting on his own legs and he's watching us play. We're doing drills and stuff where we had to run around him. He's in that squat.

There was blood on his ass. No, there wasn't. No, I swear to God. There was a blood stain on the back of his shorts. I think something seriously, seriously wrong. Is he still with us today? He's dead now. But he was a great – oh, no, he passed. He passed away.

He was gone. But he did – this was a real injury. And this – no, he's gone. Do you think the shot put had anything to do with that? No. It was cancer. But so Halloween. So basketball coaches, Halloween shot put.

It's all good. You know, I pissed myself once doing a neti pot. What's a neti pot? That thing that gets your boogers out of your nose. How so that? You fill it with a saline package with lukewarm water. Oh, it's literally like a teapot and you turn sideways and it goes through your ears. This was about a week ago.

I wasn't young. This was literally about last week. I was not young at all. You urinated on yourself. 100%. Yes! No, it was not a candle. Finally, I'm not the only one

pissing on themselves as an adult. Bro, the worst part was I didn't even know. Excuse me? No, I didn't know. I woke up. You got loose urethra? I guess so.

Or I was so overwhelmed by gagging on my own snot and loogies, I didn't even realize. I wake up, couldn't breathe, eyes are shut from crustaceans. Right?

My wife goes, hey, Afrin and your pills, they're not doing it. You're going to do the neti pot. I'm like, alright. So I get over the sink. This is fresh off the wake up. I'm in my boxers. I do it. I'm sitting there. Because I couldn't breathe through my nose. And the shit's coming through my mouth.

And you're a little dramatic. A little dramatic, but I couldn't breathe. There's boogers coming out of my throat. All sorts of stuff, right? So I finish. I go, oh. It's a littleers coming out of my throat, all sorts of stuff, right? Oh, God. So I finish. I go, oh, oh, it's a little better. Okay. I walk back in the room. Liv literally goes, what the f*** did you just do? And I go, what do you mean?

She goes, you pissed yourself. I look down. There's a full, I'm talking full-blown pissing of myself in my underwear. And I was like, holy s***. I didn't even realize I did it. I full-blown pissed myself. That is insane.

A huge piss mark right there. Okay, what was your initial feeling? From cleaning boogers. Okay, but damn it, that kind of sucks you didn't feel it. Oh, I didn't feel it at all. Because I wanted you to feel that first initial five seconds because it's so good. See, that's so gross of you. You send pictures of your fecal matter to your friends and your wife.

That's a competition. That's a competition. This was an accident. This was not something to be proud of. This was not something that is all right. This is not accepted by society. Okay. Poop pictures is.

Speaking of your bathroom. Okay. Okay. So you know the other day when we were going out, right? Yes. And I was at your house. And we congregated at your house before we went out. Yes.

And I asked you, I said, hey, Cam, can I go borrow some of your cologne? Do you remember that? What are you about to tell me? Because I'm already getting scared slash annoyed. Well. Yes. and I asked you, I said, hey, Cam, can I go borrow some of your cologne? Do you remember that? What are you about to tell me? Because I'm already getting scared slash annoyed. Well, no, no. Well, it's cool. So I went into your bathroom where you told me the cologne was,

and you have so much cologne. Yeah. And you know me. I'm a little, like, curious. I'm a little curious guy. What are we doing? You're mixing scents? so I was pretty familiar of everything in your old bathroom right at your old place I knew where everything was I know what every drawer

was concerning it's who I am okay and so I started going through your drawers what are you doing no that's now I can understand some frustration but you know my heart. You have some cool contraptions in there. I opened up one of your drawers, right? Yeah. And there was this, like, this little thing, like, this little mechanism that I could only assume was a tongue scraper.

Oh, yeah, it is, it is. And I've never tried a tongue scraper before. You son of a bitch. And I've heard tried a tongue scraper before. You son of a bitch. And I've heard good things about it. You son of a bitch. You did not do it. And so I ran the warm water for bacterial purposes. I washed off your tongue scraper.

I opened up. And I started tongue scraping, right? But I don't get why you like that because I gagged on it. And like a bunch of phlegm came out. Do you gag on your tongue scraper? What do you mean you gagged on it? It went too deep, I assume. Are you scraping your throat?

It's a tongue scraper. I got a long tongue. You, okay. So not only you used my tongue. That's like saying, hey, I saw your toothbrush and I had a piece of gum stuck. I had to get it out. You know I use your toothbrush in college. You know that.

See, and that's bullshit. And we had a deep discussion off camera about how that's not acceptable. But I didn't go to my molars or this. I thought it would be more acceptable if I was just on my tongue. I got clean tongues like a dog. You used my tongue scraper and you used it deep enough to where you gagged yourself. Twice gagged. You're not going to see heaven.

I put it back. I hope. Yeah, I see it every heaven. I put it back. I f***ing hope. Yeah, I see it every morning. Did you use it? Did you clean it afterwards? No, but I washed it off before I used it. I assume everybody washes it off before they use it. Why wouldn't you wash off your tongue scraper before you use it?

You wash it before and after. Because it's disgusting. It's your tongue. I've used that since. I have used that since the night we went to the casino. And you're telling me right now to my face you have not cleaned it and you were sitting there gagging on it. You're gagging on my tongue scraper and you didn't. Well, it's not my fault you didn't clean it before you used it.

I did clean it before I used it, but all your shit just sits there and it got mildew on it and germs and nasty white ass tongue and i tried to drink a gatorade after it gatorade tastes completely different it's a good tongue scraper oh my god oh i've never i have never been closer to striking you and you're you're so lucky we're dressed as a barnacle boy and mermaid man barnacle boy and mermaid man because there's no way. There's no way. I just think you're being a bad friend.

Bad friend. A bad friend would say, hey, the bathroom's to the left, and it's to the right. That's a joke. A bad friend, a really bad friend would go, hey, I came in here and asked for cologne.

Let me use this tongue scraper on my sick yuck mouth. That's a bad friend. Let me gag on it, and then not wash it after. That's a bad friend let me gag on it and then not wash it after that's a bad you're a piece of shit you're a piece of shit star boy mermaid man fix your bra huh yeah you're a skimpy little witch you're you mean okay cam but that is un that so you're saying if we're on a deserted island you wouldn't let me use your mouth utensils if we had a deserted island and i

had a mouth utensil i'd probably use it on my ass to keep it clean get no diseases would you let me use it on mine no what is this ancient wrong that's what i'm saying you're a bad friend sharing is caring brother sharing is caring cam yelled at me for taking a shit in his bathroom in his new house when did that happen remember because cj's a snitch. And I said, bro, something's not right. And you have 18 bathrooms in your house, but I chose to use yours. See, that's where the problem lies. It's the nicest one. You didn't even let me walk into your bathroom, let alone use it.

I don't even know what your toilet looks like in your bathroom. The seat's broken. I've never seen it. Because you go, hey, no shot, bro. Get out. You go, two more. Pick your poison, not this one. Okay, that's my house rules.

You never laid your house rules. Hey, courtesy rules and good friend rules, no shot, bro. Get out. You go, two more. Pick your poison, not this one. Okay, that's my house rules. You never laid your house rules. Hey, courtesy rules and good friend rules, you scumbag. Don't use mine. That's fake. You used my tongue. I'm not getting over this. I used your tongue scraper, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God, and you didn't.

You didn't smell anything on it. Oh, come to think of it. I'm just kidding. You gagged on. How is this not. How are you so fine with just admitting this to me? Because we share underwear. Yes or no?

No! You steal my underwear! How do I steal it? Because you never give it back. I give it to you willingly. So that's still sharing it. I give it to you willingly. Okay, but that's sharing it.

Once you give it to me, that's sharing it. Do you give it back? That's still sharing it. Do you give it back? I have. Before. Before? You got a pair of mine right you give it back? I have. Before? You got a pair of mine right now, trifecta color.

It looks like a little boy. And once I give it back, that's still sharing it. Oh, my God. So what's the difference between sharing drawers and sharing tongue scrapers? Because that's like you saying, hey, I shared your drawers. I got active one night. There might be a stain in there. That's what you're saying.

You gagged on it. Yeah, you gagged on it, and you didn't clean it off. Okay, so that's like saying. That's like wearing my underwear, going on a full date to the state fair, getting sweaty-ass, swamp-ass syndrome, and then handing them back to me smelling like Rufus. Okay, this is going to test your loyalty right now. You know how much I hate the dentist. Yeah.

Okay, this is the option. Either I, Peyton Harden, get to root canal, which is my biggest fear because I hate the dentist. Yes. Or I get to use your tongue scraper for a week. Root canal. You probably need it. See, that's so fair.

I'm kidding. If that, okay, it's always, I would have sterilized it with alcohol if you were like, dog, I really need it. Taste buds are shot. I need to get them back up to par. That's something. I can work with that. You asked for cologne and you gagged on my tongue scraper.

How is this not making sense to you? I know, I understand. Hey, P, can I use your computer? By the way, I just wiped my asshole with your toothbrush. That sucks to hear. Maybe we need to work on our communication. That's the problem. We?

You just said you creep through my drawers like Sherlock Holmes. You never creep through my drawers? I did it today, actually. I'm just kidding. No, I have enough respect. Okay, but you know something that happened? What? So me and CJ were driving, right?

Yeah. It was definitely you. It wasn't CJ. No, CJ's never driven a day in his life. I was driving, and CJ's being my passenger princess. I was driving, and one night, the moon was the biggest i've ever seen it i've always had speculation but now i am 110 sure the moon there's something behind it dog there's something it can't be bro it literally looked like a projector and he's taking up half

the sky i could have walked to that bitch no no shot why is the moon so big the moon's big in certain places at certain times okay and then i was walking outside today charging my car daytime noon yeah moon was there moon doesn't leave buddy then why can i see it because it doesn't leave i just said it doesn't leave so you can see it every day all day no then why could I see it today? Some days there's clear skies, good visibility. No, clear skies. Say there's like eight clear sky days.

Say there's eight clear sky days. Your star is creeping me out, bro. I'm sorry. I haven't seen your nose in about an hour, and I'm starting to think it's gone. It is creeping me out. It's so much just teeth and gum. I don't even see your upper lip. Oh, my God. It's scary starting to think it's gone. It is creeping me out. It's so much just teeth and gone. I don't even see your upper lip.

Oh my god. It's scary. Okay, it's there. Say there's eight Say there's eight clear sky days in a row, right? How many of those days do you think you'd see the moon? Maybe three. So where does it go the other days? It's still there. But why can't I see it on certain days, brother? Maybe certain times it's kind of

hiding, but it's on a coffee date with Jupiter. I don't know. I'm not an astrologer anonymous. All right, well, this conversation's over there because I'll just be talking to myself. But I was just trying to inquire about the world. What do you want me to say? And I don't get emotions.

I genuinely don't get emotions. Can we talk about that for a second? I don't get it. It's always good to talk about it. I don't get that. I don't understand when something makes like like say somebody says a joke why do i laugh because it's funny no but why is that my natural reaction to go hee ha ha what the are you kidding me and like and something makes me sad

why does my face scrunch up and there's water out of my skull? Where's the water coming from? 70% of your body's water. No, dead ass. Where does the water come from? 70% of your body's water. Where does it come from? Oh, you hook up to the hose. It's inside of you.

Yeah, but where? Is there like a tank of something in me? Your whole body's water. So why do I, if I cut myself on a door, right? I'm walking past and I cut myself. Why is there blood coming out and not water? Yeah! Yeah! Hey, you

have too good of nights. You think of amazing, amazing questions. Exactly. So why whenever I'm crying, why is there water coming out and not blood? Because if you cried blood, I'd burn you at the stake. I'd get holy water. I'd turn to revelations and I'd stab you through the heart with a wooden pitchfork.

I would absolutely get rid of you. Try to answer that. I don't get it. The emotions or the blood and water? Both of them. Blood and water. That's weird. Exactly.

So why when I cry, is there water coming out, not blood? Maybe there's like a cool little tank right there. Yeah, do we have like a tank in our skulls? Because you know how sometimes when you cry and then you're still trying to cry if there's no more water left maybe you use it all do you cry long no i have long cries they're bad that's they're honestly embarrassing they're embarrassing for a 26 year old shouldn't be but jesus like i'm being so serious no i don't i i don't know like emotions if you think about it we've just accepted emotions that is the craziest thing in the world.

Why, when somebody makes a joke, do we illicitly go hee hee, ha ha, and our stomachs crunch up? Why, or when we're sad, just tanks of water come out of us? Where's that coming from? Dude, this is genius. Thank you. Like, it doesn't make sense. And so why is there not water coming out when you get a scrape on your knee? Why is it blood and not blood when you cry?

You might be on to something. I don't even know what to say. Emotions, I think, honestly, now that I think about it, emotions are real, dog. They're not real. Like, how does that make sense? Okay, you just expressed an emotion, though, so that's very real. No, but I'm choosing to.

I think everything's a choice. Okay. Dead ass. You choose? You can inherently see. No, but I'm choosing to. I think everything's a choice. Okay. Dead ass. You choose? You can inherently see. No, because I wake up sad as. Oh, bubba. No, but yeah.

You can see. If someone walked in. Don't do that. Don't do that. Stop looking at them. Stop looking at them. Fix your star. If you woke up sad.

See, you didn't choose that. No, I didn't. That's just a bad morning for you sad day what's bad it's every morning no it's a great no but that has to so no one has an answer of why and what the f**k is a yawn are we kidding me no i'm sorry i'm starting to get mad why if somebody over here would have yawned right now why do i involuntarily open my throat bro i close my throat i want my throat closed bro? Close my throat. I want my throat closed. That should be my motto.

Peyton's throat is closed. We're aliens. We're aliens. You know, Yanni? What the f***? See, if you even talk about it, somebody yawns. Oh, my God. I'm magic, dog.

No, we're all David Blaine's. Emotions, blood, and tears. Not real. Let me put that out there. It's nothing's real. Nothing's real. Stick your hand out. Okay, you know what it's nothing's real nothing's real stick your hand okay you know what i'm saying like say stick your hand you know in every so say like you know in cop shows right or in movies when someone gets pop up poo pooed yeah right somebody gets pew pew bang

why is there blood that comes out if we're 80 water why is there so much blood because we have blood too there's a lot of blood in our body and we reproduce it if it's 80% water how can you have 80% blood too that's 160% liquid in your body what am i am I an aquarium I'm a human being dog none of this makes sense who's the scientist that made this huh who told us these facts that's not in the Bible that's not new that's not in the New King James Version we just make it all this up, you need to write a book. I'm telling you. No one knows.

I mean, people know. People go to school to study that stuff, but I don't know. And you're talking to me. So that's kind of, that's the brick wall we're at. But there is some people that know. We need it, but that's what we need to do for you. Where's my water tank? It's like right there.

That's my heart. It's probably somewhere near that. I would assume the heart gets thirsty at some times. Some hearts get thirsty for water. Some get thirsty for lust. And why do you, when you get hot, is it blood that goes to it and not water? It is blood. Why is it not water if it's 80% water?

It's blood. But then when you get hot enough to where it's no longer blood. It's something else. So where does that come from? There's so many liquids in us. There's so much in us. Blood. Water.

Earth. Fire. Wind. Semen. when semen until the fire nation attack i don't make it doesn't make sense to me i was thinking about that i was bro you are you are an absolute okay God my brain's all over the place ADHD Speaking of blood This past weekend We were building the nursery And my dad Hit his arm

My You You Screaming my dad Loud enough He's gonna bleed Yeah he's old He's got thin skin

Thin skin syndrome He just celebrated his 60th birthday Happy birthday big Mike Happy birthday Mike Shout out to you and that queso Happy birthday Papa Mike And Mike's famous queso Here we go

Cuts his arm right Yeah He goes Ah ah I'm bleeding Shit I'm bleeding everywhere Shout out to you and that queso. Happy birthday, Papa Mike and Mike's famous queso. Here we go. Cuts his arm, right? Yeah. He goes, ah, ah, ah, I'm bleeding. Shit, I'm bleeding everywhere. He goes, go get something. Get something. I go, all right.

He goes, you don't got Band-Aids? I go, well, I got to go. I don't show him my pocket. He goes, you youngster. Pulls out his wallet. He goes, when you're young, you carry condoms in your wallet. When you're old, you got Band-Aids.ids and he had a band-aid behind his debit card And then in the other pocket he pulls out a napkin wipes the blood off

Sticks the band and goes hand me that drill Just gets right back to it. I'm like who the hell are you? That's the most old head shit ever to carry around bandages He literally said when you're young you carry condoms when you're old you carry bandage That's sick work. And I said, you are a goblin amongst men. The You Should Know Podcast.

R.I.P. In the spirit of Halloween, this is a Halloween episode. It's spooky, it's sexy, and you got a cute little velvet bra on, but you already know what we're about to do?

Actually, you don't. Here we go. We are doing Halloween trivia What does that even mean? For all of our trivia lovers and everyone that loves to see you struggle Here we go What is Halloween trivia? It's some simple trivia questions based around the beautiful holiday of Halloween

Pumpkins That's probably one of them First one What is the most popular Halloween candy in the US? Candy? Candy Snickers Reese's Peanut Butter Cups Reese's Peanut Butter Cups are for Oh my the most popular halloween candy in the u.s candy candy snickers reese's peanut butter cups

oh for reese's peanut butter cups are for oh my dude oh my god little gremlins if you eat reese's peanut butter let me know they might throw a bag so i'm gonna say that but i don't i've never had a reese's peanut butter cup i've never had a reese's peanut butter cup how are you talking all this shit about it because because they tried to market to me as a kid they tried to market to me as a kid and i didn to market to me as a kid, and I understood it, and I was like, that's a little wrong. They were like, Reese's Puffs, Reese's Puffs. Peanut butter chocolate flavor.

Bravado. In which country did Halloween originate? Pakistan. No, somewhere medieval like Great Britain. Okay, that's not quite, but close. Like somewhere gloomy and dark. Okay. Sweden?

No, close, but keep going. Austria. A lot of beer. Ready? One, two, three. Ireland. Yes, sir. Let's go.

Originated in Ireland. Conor McGregor. Here we go. Here we go. What is another name for a carved pumpkin used at Halloween? Lantern. A jack-o-lantern. You forgot his government.

Jack-o-lantern. Not just a lantern. Lantern is light. Jack's the pumpkin. Why do we call pumpkin Jack's? I'm not really sure. Here, we'll get you a guaranteed win. Yeah.

What do people traditionally say when they go door-to-door on Halloween? Trick-or-treat. Beautiful. Smell my feet. Give me something good to eat. You had jingles? You didn't hear that? You didn't say that?

Trick-or-treat. Smell my feet. Give me something good to eat I don't care I can tell your underwear Something about What is this the Salvation Army Give me something good to eat

They're giving you a candy You're asking for a meal I've never heard that I just said trick or treat Yeah you're lazy You're like I'm hungry give me I'm a big back where Where's the Reese's? What mythical monster is said to be repelled by silver bullets?

Frankenstein. No. Mythical creature? Is that like the- Mythical monster. A monster. What's a mythical monster? Like Loch Ness?

No, they're repelled by silver bullets. Bigfoot? Repelled by silver bullets. Iron Man? I don't know what the fu- I don't know what that is. Take a guess. I did.

It's not the Loch Ness Monster. It's not Bigfoot. And it's not a... What did you say? No, Frankenstein. Yeah, I'm sure you could mow Frankenstein down with an M16. Are you recording me? No.

I don't know. Werewolves. That's a mythical creature? Those are real. Werewolves. That's a mythical creature? Those are real. Aren't werewolves real? For real, dead ass. Werewolves are real? Yeah.

You know a guy named Steve that's hairy? He's an accountant. And if a full moon strikes, he rips through his Levi's and he goes, at midnight? No. Are you kidding me? He's on a quest to find Van Helsing? What are you talking about?

Who? You're not good with Halloween. No, because I believe in Christ. No, but not the first part where there's a strange account. I'm talking about the actual wolf that howls at the moon. Isn't that a werewolf? That's a wolf. What's the were part come from?

A human that turns into a dude with a full moon strikes typically at midnight. They have to get and they go find their quest. No, but there's wolves that howl at the full moons.

That's a regular wolf. Then what makes it weird? A weird wolf. A werewolf is a man or a woman that transforms into one.

Read a book. Watch a movie. Okay. Holy shit. Well, I thought they made movies based off the actual ones. You're the worst. You are the absolute worst.

What did people originally use to make jack-o'-lanterns, not lanterns? What did people originally use to make jack-o'-lanterns before pumpkins became the norm? So it's not pumpkins. It's not pumpkins.

The cabbage? Close. Is that fruit? No. Think Ireland again. Beer? What are they? Not beer.

They're like, look at that, Steve. No. Turnips and potatoes. I don't even know what a turnip is. The little John. Turnips. It's the only turnip I know. Turnips what?

No, turnips and potatoes. What's a turnip? A turnip. What is that? It's a veggie. Not too keen on those. That's why turnip I know. Turnip what? No, turnips and potatoes. What's a turnip? A turnip. What is that? It's a veggie. Not too keen on those. That's why you don't know. You're not too hip.

I just figured out what quinoa was the other day. Which city in the U.S. is known as the Halloween capital of the world? Oh, Gotham, probably. Arkham. Take a guess. Halloween. Halloween capital of the world In the US city

Ready 1, 2, 3 South Central Nope I bet it gets spooky Out there on Halloween Like give me a bag See here you go Sorry

We have to go to LA One more guess Ready 1, 2, 3 New York No Keep going Ready 1, 2, 3 Wisconsin

Getting close but not really i kind of lied to you ready one two three idaho no one two three florida no one two three oklahoma annanoka minnesota is that a real place what's so spooky about annanoka other than the name i do not know the name sucks ass though all right here we, here we go. Next one. Now we're going to the spooky TV and movies. Here we go. In the movie Hocus Pocus, what are the...

You just throw up? What the hell was that? You just vomit? What? I said in the movie Hocus Pocus. Never heard of that? Hocus Pocus. Why is this triggering you?

Your ass is hanging out. Oh, my God. Those are huge, bro. What's Hocus Pocus? It's a movie. What is Hocus Pocus? In the movie Hocus Pocus, what are the Sanderson sisters' first names? Sanderson.

Close. S is one of them. Sandra. You're naming three. It's very close. Sally. No, you're getting further. You're getting colder.

Sam. You're getting colder. Sam. No, you're getting colder. It's the same name. You said Sandra, and I said close. It's like literally... Sandra.

You son of a bitch. You're just going to change the name. You say it. It's super close. Ready? One, two, three. I don't know what it means. It's like literally... Sandra. You son of a bitch. You're just gonna change the name you say it. It's super close. Ready? One, two, three. I don't know what it means. Sam. It has an S, it has an A, it has an R, it has an A. Sarah. There you go. Sarah's one of them. What are the other two? CJ? No. Why'd you look at him? I was looking at the camera. Oh. Liv? No. Cam. Mary and Winfred. They definitely own people. In what film does a group of friends accidentally release a curse by reading from the Book of the Dead? Stranger Things? No. The Evil Dead. I don't know what that is. I don't know these.

You're okay. Don't ask me the movies. Ask me like two more of the not movie ones. Okay. Okay. That's a deal. Here we go. What supernatural creature is said to lose its powers if the coffin is filled with grains or seeds?

I wasn't listening. What? I deadass wasn't listening. That felt like I was in school again. I deadass did not hear a word you said. That was embarrassing. One more time. Something about seeds. I heard that.

Pumpkin. Something about pumpkins, right? Bro, you're looking right at me. I know. Your eyes are watering. That's how good I am. That's embarrassing. I feel bad for teachers. Holy shit.

Okay. I said... That question must have been boring as fuck. I said, what supernatural creature is said to lose its powers if the coffin is filled with grains or seeds vampires there you go a vampire

I thought that was garlic no you can kill him with a garlic clove and a wooden pitchfork or a steak and a cross with the holy word you go down back last one oh my god why are spiders considered lucky on Halloween And a cross with the holy word. You go, thou beckon. Say it one more. Last one. Oh my god. Why are spiders considered lucky on Halloween?

Get eight wishes. Eight legs, eight wishes. What are you, de-legging the arachnid? You get eight wishes. Arachnid. Arachnid. Yeah. Why are spiders considered lucky on Halloween? Better guess. Arachnid. Yeah. Why are spiders

considered lucky on Halloween? Better guess. Ready, go. Their webs. Why are they considered What about their webs? If you touch it

you get a wish. What, you get a disease? You get a wish from the ER? Folklore and myth says that a spider seen on Halloween means that a spirit

of a loved one is watching over you. Oh, I don't want that. Why? I don't know. I don't want them watching me. I don't want Meemaw to see me. No, no, no, no.

What? No. How long do you wait until after the funeral? Oh, my God. Oh, man. Because you know she's still like, damn, I need to see him. She's like, I need to check and make sure my boy is doing good. You're over here.

Ah, you're heading to my crotch. The couch! You're hurting me. Ow! Ow! Oh my God. You're crooked. What's like...

You're heavy. Surprisingly. In your opinion, what's like the default pizza? The in your opinion in your opinion what's like the default pizza the hell does that mean like default like if you're just imagine a pizza pepperoni pizza 10 times out of 10 huh pepperoni pizza 10 times out of 10 default 100 pepperoni pizza like if somebody from in space came down and they're like what's pizza what are you showing them 100 a pepperoni pizza. Why so? That is the only right answer.

Because if you just show them a cheese pizza, it's a circle with cheese. That's what a pizza is. No, no, no. That's OG pizza. That's pizza that Jesus Christ made. That's what pizza was originally. Jesus Christ was giving out tilapia and bread. I'm pretty sure.

He was giving out fish bread and making some water and some wine. Man, what a guy. All right. Deadass? a guy. All right. Deadass? Deadass. If you do pizza, cheese pizza. Default pizza. Pepperoni.

So when you're making a character online in the video game, they're not going to have clothes on. Holy shit. So why would you put them in a Rick Owens outfit? That's not clothes. That's not a default human. If pepperoni equates to Rick Owens in your mind, then your taste buds are ass. You have the weirdest taste buds ever. You go, pepperoni flared Balenciaga.

No. Pepperoni pizza dignifies and shows it's a pizza. Think about kids. Think about kids. I don't want to. You're talking about drawing and seeing pizza. Yes, yes. If a kid drew a cheese pizza.

Yeah, it's a pizza. It's going to be a circle with another circle for the crust and lines yes that's pizza if you do circle circle lines and throw red things on top there's you're never so if you're coloring it you can still tell it's a cheese pizza it's like cardboard no it's not cam default pizza pepperoni pizza is a variation of pizza. That's a variation of pizza. Cheese pizza is just pizza. Bro, no. No.

That's like saying margarita pizza. No, margarita is cheese. That's a different form of cheese. Margarita pizza is not cheese pizza. It's just sauce. Margarita pizza doesn't have cheese on it? Like little squares. Oh, so now it does have cheese on it, you bastard.

Pepperoni shows a pizza what it is so why wouldn't you show them an olive pizza so if you if you pulled up if you pulled up say matter of fact what what is the isn't the pizza emoji pepperoni i don't know i'm no it's not is it is it is it pepperoni the pizza emoji pepperoni when you do pepperoni, the pizza emoji, pepperoni. When you do pepperoni shops, or pizza shops pepperoni, I'm losing my damn words. Pepperoni shows it being pizza. That dignifies it. That makes it something.

Pepperoni. Oh, it is. It is. Okay, but that's still wrong. How the hell is that wrong? Because just because Steve Jobs made it doesn't mean it's real. That's still wrong. You're not hearing me.

If pizza was just cheese, it's just a circle of dough and bread. What was the first pizza ever created? Probably pepperoni pizza. Are you kidding me? Okay, first pizza ever created was probably cheese pizza. So, that's the OG pizza. That's fine. It can be OG.

That can be first. It doesn't mean it's the best. I didn't say it's the best. I said what's the default pizza. If you had to show an alien pizza, you're showing him a pepperoni pizza. So that means if somebody were to show them an olive meat lover's pizza, you can't be mad at them. That's fine.

That's way more specific. No, it's not. Anytime you're at a party, what are your two options? If someone were to say, hey, we're getting pizza, do you want blank or blank? Cheese or pepperoni. Okay. So those are the two greatest of all time. Because the pepperoni is for people that are not satisfied with what Christ created.

You're back on this biblical time. I don't think he was eating pizza. Well, he could have been. No, I don't think so. I wasn't there. I don't think he was eating pizza. You were not there, and neither was I. Pepperoni pizza shows that it's pizza, shows what it's here for, and shows you're not here to play.

Cheese pizza's ass. You're either nine years old, or you have bad taste buds. Pizza always reminds me of like, like good times at a friend's house. What? What the did that mean? What was that? Pizza always reminds me of you're staying up a little too late looking at things you shouldn't.

Oh, like you watch the door and you watch the window. I'll watch the screen. Wait, what did you do? Your friend hangouts. Like you watch the door and you watch the window. I'll watch the screen. Wait. What did you do? Your friend hangouts. Wait. No, I wasn't looking at that. Wait, what were you talking about?

Just like watching like rated R movies. Oh. You're watching rated X movies. Dude, that's creepy if you did that. I'm 4K. Sorry. No, 100%. The first time I was ever introduced, my friend literally made me go. Part in 4K. Sorry. No, 100%. The first time I was ever introduced, my friend literally made me go.

I don't need to know. Yeah, the internet probably shouldn't either. Let's go into... Oh, that's bad. Since it's Halloween, that's bad. A lot of people are going to be upset that, you know, their loved one is at a Halloween party. Their crush is at a Halloween party and they're not invited. Their crush is in that skimpy little dress.

Boy, I'm going to be hurt. Just kidding. I'm not. I'm covered. Geico. Insurance. We're here. But I think it's time to bring back the world's best love doctor.

And there's only one way to bring him in, especially on a Halloween episode. Let's do it. Dr. P. Dr. it. Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Hit pause on whatever you're listening to

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available for a limited time only at mcdonald's all right doctor we're here lord hey i got i am dr p and it's been a long time since i've been back on here and i brought secretary ruby you brought another secretary do i still have my job depending i like her a lot more okay she's cute and her eyes seem to be closing ever so slightly. Look at her go. She's sleepy. She's cute. She looks like a Cornish hen. You're a Cornish hen, Ruby? All right.

In the sake of it being Halloween and a very spooky episode, if you don't mind, we're going to go with two different case studies. Okay. Okay. First one simply reads, me and this boy I like have been flirting a lot. Nice. And passing notes all throughout class. He says he has a girlfriend, but I don have been flirting a lot. Nice. And passing notes all throughout class. He says he has a girlfriend, but I don't really give a shit.

What should I do? Damn. First of all, you're a sick, sick woman. But let's put this out there, right? Think about the day and age we're in. Day of age. Day and age. Day and age.

Day and age we're in, right? All these people that are in school, right? You're not leaving, come on all these people they have iphones they have smartphones the fact that he's going out of his way to write a handwritten note instead of texting her in class he likes her but that's also probably to a method of cya Cover your ass. Oh my god, I didn't even think about that. So there is no evidence in the phone. Well look, yeah, you have no loyalty to that girl. You have no loyalty

to his girlfriend. If you like him though, just know the same way you got him is the same way you lose him. He's going to be passing notes to somebody else while he's talking to you. Hell, I'd venture the second he leaves fifth period. He's passing to some shorty in sixth period.

Oh, yeah. So as long as you're not naive and thinking that you're the only one he's doing this with, enjoy your time. If you're just trying to ruffle some feathers, if you're just trying to get a couple smooches in, then you're fine. But if you like this guy, you're in a deep hell. You are in the seventh layer. You better train for the Olympics

because you're going to go into deep waters with that one, and he's going to break your heart. And you're kind of a piece of shit. Let me say that. You don't care that he has a girlfriend? Fine. Don't expect him to care that you're his girlfriend whenever you make it.

So there you go. But I like it. You know Dr. P's all for toxicity, right, Secretary Rubes? Oh, she agrees agrees i believe the secretary agrees she looks quite tired all right second one first one is uh that was wicked by the way but a beautiful synopsis second one does in fact have to do with halloween okay dear dr p hello this time of year always scares me due to halloween parties uh-oh and i have a quick story for you last year at halloween my girlfriend-oh and i have a quick story for you last year at

halloween my girlfriend said she was going to a party with some of her girlfriends nice and i said perfect be safe have fun good boyfriend secure man however she told me that she was dressing as willie wonka to be funny but i saw on one of her friends's Snapchat stories at the party later that night, she was in a skimpy cat outfit with the pointy ears wearing lace. This caused a very big argument and a fight, as you can only assume. So my question is, she asked me if she could go to a Halloween party again this year with the same group of friends, how do I avoid this becoming a big fight?

Let me put this out there. Good God. Okay, brother. I hope you got some friends, dog. All your dogs need to just rally around you. It just gives you a hug. It needs a prayer circle. I'm telling you,

something got spooky that Halloween for her. Oh, boy. That cat found some milk, if you know what I'm talking about. That cat went to the litter box. That cat had some catnip. Golly. Listen, brother.

We've all been there. I don't know if I have. I have. It sucks. Okay. You see that? You've been there. Your girl says one thing, you see something completely opposite on social media.

In Austin, I'm well connected. Can't lie to me in Austin. You got eyes and ears. I got eyes and ears everywhere. Good man. I found out you're not where you said you were. That's a different party. I know that apartment.

I know exactly where that man lives. I know exactly who that man is. I know his social security and what his parents, his parents. And I know his parents and they left. So let me put that out there. That's a personal story. Yeah, that sounded a bit deep. That sounded like it came from guttural region.

He ain't going to do nothing about it. But I'm saying this to say, look, bro, she's not yours. She is ours. She is a community cat. She is a stray cat. But look, bro, first of all, this guy has a lot of security. A lot of security. I was going to give him his props.

The fact, and first of all, why is he not at this party? Yeah, like, are you not getting invited, dog? That's what I was going to say. Is that a red flag in itself? Let me tell you something. And I've been this. When I was getting cheated on, I was never invited to, like, parties or, like, stuff. But I was so deeply in love, like, i'm i'm the secure guy like you go

have fun with your friends but if your girl like actually like i've known because i've experienced girls that actually like me after that and they want to bring me everywhere and i've learned if they don't want to bring you everywhere they don't like you then it's just like and there is times where they just want to have girl time that's fine but if it's a thing like these halloween why am i not invited this this Halloween party? I can dress up. And why have I never met the guy or girl or whoever that's throwing this party? Well, he didn't specify that. He didn't say that.

But I'm saying if I do know them and they're still not inviting me, that's weird. That's very strange. But if I don't know them, why do I not know them? And how do you know them? Oh, my God. What if he does know all the people they did invite him but they just hit the girl was like hey you and you and Evan should totally come and she was like bet she was like Evan I'm going to this party you're gonna sit your ass there and

play college football I saw a tiktok the other day and it was I saw no I saw it this morning and it was this tiktok and I think it was a troll and i i pray it is because god bless this man he was like spend the night with me um to clean my girlfriend's apartment while she's at a frat party i can't go because i can't like i'm not that i'm not allowed into he kissed his girl she was going over their girlfriends he was in there cleaning her apartment dog and i'm like no oh my god we just like are brothers in arms, brother. We just got to band together. We got to band together. It is nasty out here.

Hey, look, bro. Final synopsis. Final synopsis. If it were me, I would say you got to grab your, well, you got to grab what you own. What's left of it. Hold what you got. And bite the bullet of being like, I'm leaving. No, no.

Bite the bullet. No, no, no no bite the bullet of you leaving this girl i know it's gonna hurt and it's gonna suck and you're gonna have and she she's gonna pretend to be really sad give it a week she's out and she's not gonna feel any kind of shame at these parties how i know for guys that have toxic girlfriends the worst time of the year is summer that first summer vacation halloween and that first weekend of christmas break when everybody comes back to their hometown oh and they go out to the bars oh man that's the worst time yeah how's your semester going oh pretty good what are your grades like oh how are yours oh god yeah bro i Yeah, bro, I would say you got to leave, brother. Or I wouldn't say just up and leave and be like, just sit down.

You got to know in the back of your mind, her catnip is being eaten. Okay. So you got to talk to her and just be like, look, which is fine. She has the right to. She's wrong, but she has the right to. You'd be like, hey, babe, why am I not invited to these parties? Why can't I go to these parties? But don't come over like, don't be like, don't be like don't be like aggressive with it just his question was how does

he bring it up without it starting like hey can i come to these like why am i not invited to these parties oh you don't know them well i think if we're together i think it would be nice to go introduce you to your friends like we could all hang out i don't really want to clarence and i'll be like well i don't really want to be with you. Yeah, she goes, that's all right. Your s*** was weak and I'm out of here. I'm going to mute the D word, but yeah, that's, hey, hey, hold on. Oh, oh boy. Let's all. Oh boy. Brothers and live sleep.

Let's all brothers together just hold hands and have a moment of saying, what was his name? I just made up Evan. I'm not going to send it out there. Evan, us men here and us men at the You Should Know podcast, moment of silence for you, brother. We love you. And it wasn't ever just yours. Stray cat.

You let that stray cat have a box to live in. You'll find a better cat, Evan. You'll find a cat at a shelter. You'll find a cat that appreciates you and your litter box. You'll find a cat that will eat your food and nobody else's. There you go. Right now, that cat is out there. For right now, you just leave some, you leave trash out.

That cat will eat it. That cat is feral. That is a stray, that is a neighborhood cat. That cat can, boy, that cat can climb a fire escape. You find that cat at 1 a.m. and you put your car light on and it will run away. That cat can get in and out. Hell, that cat's sleeping on the tire. That cat's waiting for a ride.

That cat is a master of DAs. That cat will run away and will go 17 miles down the road, but it'll find its way home. Hell, I bet that cat's spotless. I bet that cat's clean. That's a clean cat. Where'd your hand go? Where'd your hand go? That cat, that cat, that. That's a clean cat. Where'd your hand go? Where'd your hand go? That cat, that cat, that.

That's a cat. That is a. That's a cat, man. Evan, that cat's had a couple owners, dog. That's that cat. Gets out the back. Gets out the old doggy door. Cat's got nine lives.

That cat used one of them getting over the fence. Got eight left. That cat used one of them getting over the fence. Got eight left. That cat goes to the next neighborhood. That cat's crawling down the street getting in the backyard, brother. Amen.

Amen. Yeah, amen. Amen. And that was... God, Evan. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P.

Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P.

Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Noctopea. Noctopea. Noctopea. All right. Halloween episode. 2024 Halloween. CJ, you come over here because I don't want to cut to your camera.

Come over here for the announcement. She's pregnant. Sorry. No, it's okay. If you want to see more of baby CJ, we're going to shoot an extended episode with these costumes on. You can sit by right there. Just get close to him. Cam,

get us out of here. Alright, everybody. First off, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy unite! And wham! You big baby. Alright, everybody. We absolutely love y'all Remember

This Halloween If you have kids Make sure you go with them If you're old enough Do not be rude To the younger kids And no matter your age Always check your candy

Be safe Unfortunately We got some evil people Out there Check that candy Before you eat it Don't throw rocks At windows

Don't throw rocks You said don't throw Rocks at windows Don't throw rocks Don't throw eggs Just go Enjoy the spirit said don't throw rocks at windows. Don't throw rocks. Don't throw eggs. Just go enjoy the spirit of Halloween and be safe. Be safe. And get back to your house safe.

If you're drinking, go to an Halloween party, Uber. Yes, Uber, stay the night, something like that. Have a DD. Make sure you're safe and responsible because we love y'all, and we cannot wait to see you next week. So we need you back safe. And men, don't be creeps at Halloween parties. Do not be creeps.

If you are, we're going to whoop up on you. And I would say, just because if a woman's wearing a rather revealing and pretty outfit, does that not mean yes? That doesn't give you a damn right. That doesn't give you a right to do nothing. You sit there and you eat your Reese's and you drink your Miller Lite. Anyway, we absolutely love y'all. Thank you for coming back to the Halloween special.

We cannot wait to see you next week. Confuse the casuals and get your good karma with this week's secret code GCS. Gangsta Halloween section. What? What is glucose corn syrup? Glucose corn syrup. Glucose corn syrup.

Glucose corn syrup. It's really going to confuse the people. We absolutely love y'all. Leave it in the TikTok. Leave it on Instagram. Leave it on Facebook. Leave it here. Glucose corn syrup it's really going to confuse the people we absolutely love y'all leave it in the tiktok leave it on instagram leave it on facebook leave it here glucose corn syrup have a happy halloween and we cannot wait to see you next week and remember one out of ten koala bears don't make it home to christmas and we will see you hello yeah next time it's a big ass baby big baby a lot of special guests coming on the episode rdc world kane brown see you soon