You Should Know Podcast - BIRTH PAIN SIMULATOR GONE WRONG! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: September 30, 2024

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Instacart, groceries that over-deliver. The You Should Know Podcast. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to The You Should Know Podcast. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to The You Should Know Podcast, episode 132. Round of applause, please. Those are my friends. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to The You Should Know Podcast, episode 132.

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most important deal of the day has a fresh lineup. Pick any two breakfast items for $4. New four-piece French toast sticks, bacon or sausage wrap, biscuit or English muffin sandwiches, small hot coffee, and more. Limited time only at participating wendy's taxes extra we got co-host cam back in the studio hey bub oh my god what the

you heard it? My back just snapped. Bro, what? He gave me a weak-ass hug and his whole spine went... I was like, oh my God. How was your week, Bubba? It's been a long week of moving. You have been moving. Oh my God, no, no, absolutely not.

That's where I'm starting. That's exactly where I'm starting. You're a sabotagee. You absolutely sabotaged me this week. You're moving? 1,000%. I mounted a whole TV for you. Yeah, cool.

It left a hell of a lot of smudges on it, too. We had to Windex the piss out of that screen. But anyway, you sabotaged me. How? And you know exactly. How? He knows exactly. You're not talking about the goddamn groceries.

Peyton, okay. Let's break it down for them. Let's see who's in the wrong. Okay. Break it down. Break it down. What's the rule? Break it down because you needed me and you're not...

Okay. And you said yes and then you failed. Okay, go ahead. So what does that mean? Okay, go ahead. Okay. Go ahead. So...

Oh my God, go ahead. Oh my God, go ahead. I move in to my new house on Monday. My fridge doesn't come until two. Stand up, you crooked man. I move in on Monday. Fridge doesn't come until Tuesday. That's your fault. But I... Is that my fault? Because you... Okay, you crooked man. I'm moving on Monday. Fridge doesn't come in until Tuesday. That's your fault.

How is that my fault? Because you, okay, you don't want to. I didn't know when I was going to be locally available at my house. So I had to put the Tuesday fridge in the fridge on Tuesday. Then who's fault is that? Who else has fridges? I asked you and you said yes. I didn't just throw it on you.

My fault. Keep going. Hey, pardon self. Yeah, pardon self. Pardon me. I just popped out the floor. So Monday I move out. I know how long I have a fridge, but I pardon, pardon. Pardon me. I just popped out the floor. So, Monday I move out. I know how long I have a fridge, but I still have groceries.

I create a U-Haul box, right, of my cold things. First of all, you asked me to use one of my boxes. Shut the fuck up. No, you're not right. Shut up, dude. Shut up. Do you want to go first or do you want me? Okay, well, you can go first, but don't tell lies.

Hey, buddy. Be resourceful. I'm going to speak. You lazy second. There's going to be half a second of nothing, and then that's when you know you can go. Okay, go ahead, Mozart. Okay, I don't know what that is.

Long and boring, like my sex. Long, it takes me forever to get to the finish line, and it is boring. We're in one position. Hey, some of us don't have that luxury, bro. Anyway, I leave Monday. I don't have a fridge until Tuesday. I have groceries.

Here we go. I say, hey, Pete. So look, my fridge doesn't come until tomorrow. Can I pack my cold things up? You come and grab it because you're already coming over here. Because you needed me. Hey, you son it because you're already coming over here. And when you go back... Because you needed me! You needed me. Hey, you son of a bitch.

Oh, my God. He's going to come over here because I do need him. But that's the thing. That's the beauty of a question. I asked you and you said yes. So I packed all my... Who else was there?

Oh. Biden, Lisa. Payton. Go ahead. Sorry. Sorry. But you're just being stupid and you're taking a long time.

I'm taking a long time because you keep interrupting me. I pack my groceries, sauces, salmon, some chicken breast, some chocolate syrup, all of it. Cold stuff. He takes the box of colds, takes it home, puts it in his fridge. Exactly what he signed up for. Thank you, Bubba. You're a great man.

Tuesday comes. He comes out to the new house. He gets the box out of his fridge. He's ready to take it. Mind slips. Forgets it. $90 of groceries gone. his fridge. He's ready to take it. Mind slips. Forgets it. $90 of groceries gone. First of all, there's so many things wrong with it.

It's not $90 worth of shit in there. How much is salmon? You had store brand salmon. Store brand my asshole. It doesn't eat salmon. Cam. It's an expensive meat. I had a pound of chicken.

I had three fillets of salmon. Let me, okay. We'll wait until we get into the intricacies of your nasty-ass concoctions of food you had. First of all, Cam asked me to drive 45 minutes out to his house. Holy shit! Oh, no! Oh, so it's the world's ending when I interrupt you. But you did it four times to me.

45 minutes? 45 minutes. It's a 26-minute drive. Because you said, Dada, I don't know how to function without you. Baby needs milkies, is what you said. And I said, okay, baby, latch on. I'll give you what you need.

And you said, first of all, when he asked me, I'm looking at fourth camera now because your face disgusts me. I'm looking at y'all two beautiful white women. When Cam said, hey, I need these groceries to be refrigerated, how many people down the line that he was already with could have taken it to his house? His mom and his pap. Holy shit.

They're already there. He just wanted daddy's milk. He wanted daddy to give him something. Holy shit. And then the first thing he asked is ap do you have a box i could put this stuff in you're moving dog you got boxes everywhere okay the the beauty of this is you're naming shit that is it all goes out the window as soon as you said yes it goes out the window because that's the kind of guy I am.

Could I have asked someone else? I lived through Christ, brother. Could I have asked someone else? Yes. Yes. Okay. But I didn't. I asked you.

You said yes. Okay. I asked you for a box, but then I realized I had my own. So then I boxed it up. And what was the thing? Oh, you said you'd do it. That's like asking me to drive your Kia K5

to a NASCAR race and then mad if I wreck it. You should have just done it yourself or taken it out of the race. I didn't have a fridge. Your mommy and daddy, dude, they were already with you. Okay, I'm not done. Holy shit, but they weren't supposed to come on Tuesday

and I knew you would. So I asked you. I wasn't going to. I wasn't going to. You actually said I don't want you to come to my house until it's fully done and decorated. Did he not say that, CJ? CJ.

CJ. Did he not? Okay, thank you. And then, okay, so let me break this down. First of all, he's asking me to package his groceries, right? We're putting the groceries in the box. You shut your colonizing ass up. I'm going to give you the respect, and I'm going to bury you when I get to speak again.

Okay, all right. He asked me to put these weird-ass ingredients into this box, right? He's like, we need these. This is the good stuff that I want to bring over to the house. I already threw away half the stuff that's in the fridge. I said, okay, so I'm thinking it's going to be meat. Like the salmon, that was okay to put in there. The chicken, that was okay to put in there.

This mother— okay to put in there the chicken that was okay to put in there this mother he gave me a whipped cream that had this much left in it bro i tried to squirt some out because i like to do that i like to i put the nozzle in my mouth i did i put it in my mouth you never told me you were used oh my god oh my god you didn't sabotage me you scammed me you gotta buy you got an 80 box of groceries you just had a kroger pickup straight to your car you scammed me you got a you got an 80 box of groceries you just had a kroger pickup straight to your car you scammed me no okay and i put in there and it was doing one of those little drips sorry yeah it was doing one of those like little half drips in my mouth i was like why does he even have this and then he had taco bell sauce that had crust on the outside because it hasn't been used in forever and there was this much left holy shit dude and then you had icicle pops okay cool you can refreeze those and then

you had hershey kisses caramel drizzle you fat big back bitch okay you don't need that no you're done okay the whipped cream that's for my dog ever heard of a pup cup she likes dessert too the caramel syrup that's for my wife's coffee she likes it asshole coffee holy shit this morning holy shit for instagram the popsicles pregnant she that don't know pregnant holy shit you asked for my grocery so you can eat them it makes sense it makes sense i didn't want that nasty ice oh God. It all goes out the window when you said yes. Okay. You accepted responsibility, and you failed at your job.

That's it. If you brought the groceries, and they fell out of your car in transit, I'm not that mad. That's a freak accident. You said yes. You were supposed to bring them. Calm down. You even laid them out.

Let's calm down. And then you didn't't and they were all wasted and done for. Okay. And then you... Except the whipped cream you stole right from under me. And then half the drinks

in there were already mine that I gifted to you. Let's put that out there. The alcohol in there, that was mine that you stole from me just like you stole the Alani news from me

whenever we got a brand deal with them and I didn't get to eat any drink, any of them. Holy shit. The alcohol that was in there was yours.

The three white cloths that were in there were yours. Yes, prove me wrong. Holy shit. Prove that was in there was yours. The three white claws that were in there were yours? Yes, prove me wrong. Holy shit. Prove yourself right. Because I can say exactly where those came from. Who drinks the most alcohol in the friend group?

That's you. Okay. That's you. And we're going to talk about it. Who supplies the most alcohol in the friend group? Holy shit. Who supplies them? Holy shit.

When's the last time you bought white claws? Holy shit. Oh my God. Oh my God. It's your time to be honest. Oh my God. You can save yourself. That's the last time you bought white clothes? Holy shit. Oh my God. Oh my God. It's your time to be honest. Oh my God. You can save yourself. That was the last time because you stole from me and I was like, I'm never doing this again.

Okay. So God's honest truth, the Lord and Savior that blesses us both every day. God thank you. Those were bought from Ryan David Clifton. Bullshit. On everything I've ever looked. Where is he? On my life, your life.

You see him back here? Everyone's life that's that's okay rob that's cj awfully convenient this is a hectic way to start the episode that is awfully convenient bro okay i'm just saying and then and then you started adding on more responsibilities to me whenever it's time to return the groceries you called me and said hey can you do this i need this i need this i need i need i want i need i need can you please daddy i need you and then i was like okay okay, okay, I got you. I got you.

But I can't think all this. And so I was grabbing the groceries out of the fridge. I didn't even put the box in the fridge. I sorted them in my fridge for you. And you had garlic, brother. Yes! Who wants to rebuy condiments? We had minced garlic.

Good to use. Garlic's a condiment? No, I'm saying all the rest of them are condiments. But minced garlic, it's good to use. Why should I rebuy them? The ketchups, the barbecues, the Taco Bell sauce, when the crusties means that you pour it out of the bottle and there's a little left on when you put it back in the fridge.

We're going to get off this. We're going to get off this because we've got to start the episode. But, yes or no, were you at, right down the road from my house, that same day, going to that furniture store? No. That was literally the next day you bastard you bastard and you said i had to ask you is help me this this that third it was hold the groceries deliver the groceries you hold them in your fridge bring in the next day two steps okay don't ask me

to do shit no more i won't do nothing for you i didn't even say that but you're trying to flip it on me sorry i'm trying to be a good friend. I've never asked you of anything. Whenever I'm moving, when I'm moving, when I'm moving, do I? I never asked you to do anything for me when I moved. Did I? I hired movers. I used my hard-earned money and not my friend's hard labor. Who was there when the movers were

there for you? You were not. You wouldn't even give me the decency. Holy, I'm about to vomit. I'm going to throw up. You wouldn't even give me the decency to drive all the way to my house. I had to meet you halfway at 6 in the morning. Remember that?

Dewey, not meeting a dick sporting goods brother. I either got to punch you or puke. There's no other in between. I met you at 6 o'clock in the morning to get a fucking key for your new place in case your movers beat you there. And then I never even had to do it, but I never complained. Yes, you did. Holy shit.

You said, oh, my God, look at the traffic. I have to go back in. Not only that was very freshly into my new car journey, and I thought I ruined my transmission because I put it in manual for you. I was stuck on the tollway going 17 miles an hour, and I didn't know what was going on, and I called my father and woke him up. So you're blaming your inadequacies in your brain about car knowledge. Oh, you shut your damn mouth.

I'm saying you said be here at 6 at a Dick's Sporting Good in Dallas, Texas, and I was there at 6. Because, hey, have you ever you owe me one after all the things i've done for you moving this taking care of that rat ass dog you have getting fleas for her you love that rat don't you talk about that don't you talk about her you love that rat i do but i don't have to take care of her and then you know what cam said the other day he said ap the first like two months malachi's around i'm gonna need your help brother i said need my help and two months malachi's around i'm gonna need your help brother i said need my help and he goes yeah he's like i need help with like diapers and like

stuff like that can you come over and like it like middle of the night too because you know lives just got off this nine month pregnancy i'm a lazy sack of shit so i'm not getting up will you be there that's what he said to me so who's the better friend that's what i said to you yeah who's the better friend the guest room that i have labeled as yours in this nightstand drawer, there's condoms, honey packs, there's chewing bubble gum, and there's an iPhone charger. And a little bottle of tequila in the back corner. So you tell me who's the better friend, you slimy, saliva-mouth-having bastard.

Yeah, who's the better friend, you sick son of a bitch oh my god i am hot oh my god no okay no bullshit can i tell you a story that happened we're moving out so we're moving out you know my old apartment building to go to the trash cans you'd have to go down the elevator first of all your old apartment building was a maze bro no it was bad it literally was like a some like if you were intoxicated and that was your first time there you'd be terrified you know i am a little sad that okay i know you know your story i am sad that you are moving out of there why one because you're closer yeah two but that's because you had some victorious secret models living in that building i'm not gonna lie to you i found a couple of them in there there was a you can just act you can fake pretend that

i still live there and you'd be like, it's called stocking. You go, yeah. You're like, who are you here for? My friend, Cameron. Yeah. You go, I think he's in your room. I'm going to check there. You go, get out the way.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Totally kidding. Totally kidding. But, so as we're packing shit up, naturally, you're always going to find stuff that you don't want anymore. You throw it away. Yeah, God bless.

So Liv finds her backpack, all of her cosmetology school stuff remember that journey she's in there for three weeks couple thousand dollars she said i don't think i want it anymore i said anyway here we go here we go i went anyway she finds all of her cosmetology stuff and in there there's one of the fake heads that has, like, the good hair on it. Okay? Careful. What does that mean? It's like...

It's like salon... It's like a... Like a sew-in. Like, it's almost... It's damn near real hair. Okay, I just didn't know what you meant by good hair. No, stop. I didn't know what you meant by that.

I'm just saying... It's a 32 top-shelf bundle Brazilian. No, I'm just kidding. So, I'm taking a trash trip. I have the big wagon, and I'm also holding stuff. What, I'm just kidding. So I'm taking a trash trip. I have the big wagon, and I'm also holding stuff. What? You're so white.

A trash trip. I was taking my trash trip. I took the trash trip. So I get in the elevator. We're on the third floor. I hit one. A million out of a million times. When you get to the first floor, no one's there. This one time, door opens.

Woman right there. She's on her phone. Okay? She's probably a mom. She looks up, and she immediately goes, who are you and I went what the I look down I'm holding the two things that were in my head were a a blue hammer in that head that cosmetology head so I have the wagon behind me that has like trash bags she goes ah who are whoa whoa what are you talking about I look down I have a hammer and a skull in my hand and she goes oh oh you you really scared me there

for a second you need a all right and I go oh when I look down and I'm like ma'am I'm I'm going to the trash can she goes yeah you better you better i said who are you you but i me being me i just walk off and i'm sitting there just looking at it the whole time but dude she like damn near jumped out of her own skin that's hilarious but i always make myself i think we talked about this on the podcast before i always make myself known to not be a threat whenever a woman's around you're like i swear to god i'll get on the whole other side of the hallway or if like we're both going downstairs i'll wait until i hear that door

open then i'll continue to go because i know that's scary thoughtful yeah but since we're talking about uh stories about like our old places this is in my new place right and i can finally tell the story i think the statue of limitations is off i can talk about how i saw that woman tied up outside of my house yeah so if you remember a couple months ago, it was a while ago, we made these little inside jokes about it. So I just moved into my house, right? And there's a house directly across. Our front doors are facing each other, right?

Directly across. And I like this neighborhood. It's quiet. It's older people. I'm the youngest one there, so no BS is going around. I just came from living in the hood, and I saw crazy neighborhood. It's quiet. It's like older people. I'm the youngest one there, so like no BS is going around. I just came from living in the hood, and like I saw crazy stuff all the time.

Naked screaming lady. And I moved out there because like I was getting recognized in my apartment, and I didn't feel like safe. You know what I mean? So I was like, this is a safe place. I was like, I was sitting on my couch one day,

and I was watching Breaking Bad. I was like, everybody's talking about Breaking Bad. I've never seen an episode of it. It's one of those things like I just never got around to. and i was watching breaking bad i was like everybody's talking about breaking bad i've never seen an episode of it it's one of those things like i just never got around to yeah so i was turning on breaking bad i was like the first 20 minutes of this episode and my to my left is a my like a big glass door and you can see everything yeah so you can see everything when that's open but i had my my my drapes over it so it was blacked out i couldn't see outside i was watching breaking bad first 20 minutes of it and there's a scene

like a little bit of commotion has happened in the show right and it was leading up to like this a scene that you know some stuff's about to go down yeah but they're in a car it was two people in a car and there's a quiet scene and i just hear like and i was like i was looking at the show you know they got someone in the trunk what i said i don't i don't really get where the director's trying to take us with this one like i'm not i'm not understanding and then i hear help help and i go no this isn't the show this can't be i pause it and that's when i lived alone and so my house was dead silent i waited like 30 seconds and then i hear and i was like nope that's something outside yeah so i get scared i grab my knife all right i grab my knife out of my kitchen

and i and i peek out of my blinds like this i I'm like this. And I'm looking outside. I swear to God, the house directly in front of me, the front door is wide open. There is a woman laid out in the middle of my house and her house. She's tied up like this, bro. Her legs are tied. Her face is tied, and her hands are like semi-tied. She can break free if she wanted

to but then i saw her phone next to her and now so my question was immediately i'm like okay i've never seen this happen i've never seen someone tied up in my life but i know if you're trying to escape this house that you're tied up in. How do you have a phone here? How'd you get your phone right beside you? So I immediately go and call the Po-Po lease because I'm the only one seeing this. And I ain't no snitch. But I didn't want her to be in dismay. And I didn't know if Jeffrey Dahmer,

Aaron Hernandez was right there. So I said, hello? They're like, 911, what's your emergency? And I said, hello? What's your emergency? Hello? Hey, y'all there? And you know I don't like to have panic in my voice.

And so I was like, hey, there's a woman tied up outside my house. And I shouldn't have said that. Like, I shouldn't have said my first red flag no no over there four weeks and so gives the first question the operator asked like is she with you and i said oh oh no i don't know who this is like my neighbor and they're like what do you mean she's tied up is she safe and i go well i'd assume not like i don't think people just do that for hands and feet screaming and they're like so is she is she look injured and i said hey man uh she's tied up she's screaming and it looks like

she needs help pretty quick and um then my neighbors like across the street next to that house came out and started like checking on her and like untying her and i said okay i gave the address and i hung up because i was like i don't want to do that and they called me back and you ever got a call from 9-1-1 that's scary and they go peyton and i go okay how do you know my name i was like all right they say uh whenever the police get there would you uh is it okay if they come to your door and ask you for help and i said oh no i'm just kind of making you know some shit's happening that shouldn't be happening oh i promise you i can't do that i will literally faint i can't do that and so come to find out i don't know the full story is that couple across the street is known for that activity so she's been known to like make

herself look like something has happened dam Like a damsel in distress. Yes. Because she is in a bad situation where her husband or boyfriend, wherever that is, has done bad things, but she just won't leave it, which I don't blame her because it's toxic and it's hard and people go through their own things. But her way of trying to get out of it is making new scenarios to be like, hey, he did this.

So immediately when the cops got there, I could hear them. I literally opened my balcony. I was sitting up like this. I was like, i was like oh shit because i can do this it's not illegal to do that and they were saying like they're like looking at each other like doing all that but but then she got like really smart and she's remember there's a ring camera on the front door and apparently a couple weeks before that he may have harmed her outside of the house which god forbid i hate that if you touch if you hurt women you belong in hell um and then so i remember they as soon they she showed it on the phone it was this quick she goes like that they look at it they go and then run up the stairs and they grab them out and they walked them out and they moved out they don't live there anymore and now a fan lives in that same house across like literally

he moved in he saw me walk in the house and he goes peyton and i go you go hey jan yeah we need to break the lease i gotta get out of here dude my realtor bro can i talk about that i don't know if this is staying in. Go for it. The lady who gave me this house, I fell in love with her. Oh, that sounds like an episode. Mute it, but I love you. Dude, she's so pretty, and she was supposed to go on a date with me. I think she had a boyfriend the whole time, though. That's the story of my life, right?

Why does everybody I love have a boyfriend? Oh my God! The You Should Know Podcast. Every journey I take leaves a lasting impact. Traveling the world only makes me realize just how much more there is to explore. No one builds a legacy by standing still start your journey at remover.com did you ever struggle with women did you ever have a problem no yeah whenever i was like rat

tail like long hair but okay strange thing struggle no okay let me tell you pull the different crowd no no i struggled okay so like in my kindergarten years that's when i was having like ditty parties in the playground well no no wait no no okay wait no i'm just saying we had freak offs in kindergarten i can't say that i was you can say it but it's sad because it's true yeah no we're i was making out with two girls at one time i was having dunk i was having dunk contests on monkey yeah yeah i know okay so but that was my so i i started off hot right real hot very hot and then puberty started coming around and i smelled like a burger king kitchen right my hair was long and it was okay that's the thing about my long hair i had long hair but it had knots in it i had to get them cut out like i was dreading up you looked like you lived in Malibu. Like, every day you were on a beach surfing waves.

And I had gaps in all my teeth, but there was still plaque in between them. Like, that is almost historic. Oh, my God. That's bad. No, that is like some industrial. Like, if I went like that, I could feed a family of rats. You know what I mean? Like, they would eat for a week.

You lay on your bed and you go. And they go. They clean you. They run off. Yeah yeah so during that time but then i think and i gotta have this conversation with my mom right okay she low-key was a pimp named slick back for me like i remember one time wearing freddy's frozen custard right and i was wearing for some reason i think this was a fashion statement i was trying to make oh god i was wearing like a sweater vest with a light blue collared shirt under it. I swear to God.

And I don't remember why I was wearing it. Carlton? And then so... And so I remember we were in the line. And in front of us, there was a group of older girls, like middle schoolers. So I was still like elementary school, right? Or like sixth grade. They were probably like eighth, ninth grade. Older grade or elementary? No, that's middle school. I said middle school. so i was still like elementary school right or like sixth grade they were probably like eighth ninth grade older grade elementary

no that's middle school i said middle school i was about to say okay and so i was in my nasty era but i was wearing a sweater vest and i'm pretty sure i was wearing basketball shorts see like i don't know what the was happening with my attire my lay was nasty it looks like you got in the car naked and you drove to like a garage sale like that was the best i remember one of the girls turned around to me and my mom and she goes oh my god your road for like a garage sale like that was the best you could find you're like just walk around i remember one of the girls turned around to me and my mom and she goes oh my god your daughter is so pretty and and my mom was like oh no sweetheart this is my son this is my my boy his name is payton and you're like hey you turn. Your teeth are gapped. Your hair's natted. Yeah.

Natted. I meant to say not and matted. And they fused. It's okay. And then I guess my mom was trying to help a play out. She was trying to help a brother get some. And so she started like sweet talking these girls for me. And like saying my athletic achievements.

And I remember one of the girls caressed my cheek. And that set it off for me. That's hot. Yeah. But a little strange that mom was the wingman. I don't think mom was trying to get that to happen. She was just trying to prove I was a boy. You're going to know, he has it. Like, he's got one, I'm telling you.

They're like, no, that girl is just going through a rough phase. You're like, no, he plays football. He skates boards. You're just sitting there. You're just waiting just waiting like trying to have your case sold yeah so then i she caressed my face and that set it off because i felt the feeling i've never felt before wait it was bad i was wearing basketball shorts you know what i mean did you pitch a tent could have gone camping mr b 24 Beast 24-hour challenge video. You know what I mean? And so after that, that's when I got into my bag of like, I'm going to try with women.

I like these. So you were macking. So your origin story of when you started flirting, macking, making the calls was in the sixth grade? Well, technically kindergarten, whenever I was having ditty parties at the playground. Oh, yeah. No baby oil.

That's remarkable. That is absolutely insane. Can we talk about ditty real quick? Let's not. He's going at the playground. Oh, yeah. No baby oil. That's remarkable. That is absolutely insane. Can we talk about Diddy real quick? Let's not. He's going under the jail, first of all. Good. A thousand bottles of baby oil. A thousand.

Let's, okay. So for the people that don't know, if you're living under a rock, Diddy is going to jail. He's a freaky boy. Yeah, forever. And they found, when they raided his house, a thousand bottles of baby oil, right?

That's like buying from Amazon and having the thing fulfilled every month for a decade. And you're buying a case. You are a freak. Okay, and my thing is, it takes me four years to get through one bottle of baby oil. No, I swear to God, from when i met olivia yeah at seminole all the way till last year she had the same same bottle it was like five years of baby oil it's like it's like vaseline you never get a new vaseline it's a once in a lifetime purchase you purchase baby oil and vaseline once in your life can it last you your entire life

you know it is a one-stop shop is there anything in your house that people would be like okay that's a little too much of that like you have something you have too much of uh i'd say either yugioh cards or wait but that's from childhood you still got them 100 i can't let them go do you look at them do you ever ponder during covid during covid i took them out spread them all out and i reorganized them yeah i remember when I asked my fiance to help me with it, I felt this big. I felt like the smallest version of me I've ever been. I said, you want to come duel? I'll teach you. No, okay, Cam tried to get us to do that in Austin during DreamCon.

We went to the mall. Yes. And he bought a Yu-Gi-Oh! pack. First off, don't you ever, a pack? What's it called? I bought a deck. I bought two decks. My fault. I bought two decks. First off, don't you ever... A pack? What's it called? I bought a deck. I bought two decks. My fault.

I bought two decks. CJ said, yeah, I'll try to learn. I tried to get him to learn and he was like, uh, uh, uh. And when I did it, it was way too much

to explain and it was hard. Because when we played, you were saying Yu-Gi-Oh! Like, look at their HP and their power. I don't know... Attack and defense. Yeah, when I grew up,

it was like, whose card looks the best? You know what I mean? That's how we played it. He said the n***er word. No, wait, no, it was like, whose card looks the best? You know what I mean? That's how we played it. He said the n***a word. No, wait, no, wait. No, I did not. No, I did not.

He just said that. No, I did not. I heard you say it. No, I did not. We have film. No, I did not. Okay, well. We have film on you.

That's what we have film on. I can say it. I would say either Yu-Gi-Oh cards or dog treats is something that I have a very large amount and I shouldn't. I have one dog. She weighs nine pounds and I have enough to feed a pack of cane Corsos. You know what I don't have enough of? What? Socks.

Or food. Socks. Dude, how many days in a row have I been wearing these socks? I count three off the top of my head. I think I'm about four or five. Okay, you got to start doing your laundry. Let's just talk about it. That is a fact.

You have to. Like, you either have to do laundry or you have to get made on a biweekly service. Is it me? It's a must. Is it me or does laundry, like washing clothes, seem a little pendergredial to you? I actually don't like how you said that. What? Say laundry again.

Laundry. Okay, that's better. How did I say it? Your R was awfully just like airy you're like laundry yeah like there was no r to it's like lawn you love things with a hard r laundry there's an r there you said laundry but it does feel old but you're not in a weaving basket with the washboard and you hang it on a clothespin i just genuinely don't it makes me feel lesser than like i'm my ancestors look at me and be like,

you don't need to do that anymore. You know what I mean? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. That's so far-fetched. Just wash your f***ing clothes. You stink, and you wear the same socks.

You actually smell good. Thank you. I'll give you that. Your body smells good. Your clothes, though, they carry a natural smell. Yeah, that's a fact. That's a fact.

But it's okay. Have you ever lied too much to where you have to stick with it? Like, you have to stick with it? Like you have to stick with it. I used to be the best liar in the world. That scares me deeply. It would be like a goal of mine to see how long I can stretch this lie and weave this web. Are we allowed to call you a sociopath?

Is that what that is? That you're getting awfully close. I never touched anybody. That's not what that means. I thought you had to hurt somebody, the sociopath. The sociopath. It'd be like they lie, they believe their own lies. No.

I didn't believe it. I knew I was lying, but I had joy in that. Oh. That's not normal. You're not. You're digging. You're going. You want to kidnap someone?

You want a Menendez brother? Now you enjoyed lying. No, I did enjoy it. Past tense. What was your lie? Can you remember one? Probably. I swear to God I didn't text that girl.

Oh, oh, I'm talking about let's get deeper, bub. I'm talking about you had to lie, and you had to hold on to it, and almost to where it was the new truth because you were caught up. I'll tell you my story. I was going to say that I'm straight. Straight. Oh, in fifth grade. Yeah.

I don't know if your school did this. Whenever you would wait for the teachers in the mornings, like when you get dropped off, all the classes would line up in the gym, and they would just wait there. That's how our school did it. Okay. So you'd line up in your class,

and the teachers would come in, get you, take you to class. So we lined up. I left my bag there, and I had to go use the bathroom. Right. So I go use the bathroom. When I come back, my bag at like a volume 10 is playing Obsessed by Mariah Carey.

Why are you so obsessed with me? You had that on. Boy, you want to know. Lying that you're sexing me when everybody knows. Okay, so full blast, full volumes, playing that. I walk back. The little girls in my class are laughing, pointing at it. Cameron's bag's playing girly music.

The cool kids in the back of the class are going, hey, you suck. You're a weirdo. You're listening to that. Okay. Nate Diaz in your class? Yeah. Nate Diaz in your class? I immediately So immediately Immediately The first thing I could think of

I have to lie I can't go out like this I'm in the 6th grade And I'm listening to Mariah Carey by choice Off my Nokia I might add Wow okay On a Nokia

How the hell did you get that on there? It was a cool app I guess I don't know Before apps I don't know They just had a built in music Joe broke a Nokia I plugged it into my mom's desktop I gave her a virus It was a cool app, I guess. I don't know. Before apps, I don't know. They just had a built-in music. Joe broke a Nokia. I plugged it into my mom's desktop.

I gave her a virus. It was LimeWire, but I got Mariah Carey. So anyway. You wanted that shit. The second I get up, everyone's laughing at my bag. And then I get close enough I can hear it. And I go, oh, shit. I immediately go, what are y'all laughing at?

Try to be defensive at first. What are you laughing at, huh? And they go, whose bag is that? Whose bag is that? It's playing girl songs, music, whatever. i was like my bad i grabbed it right and they go why are you listening that's so girly that's so strange you i go oh no no that's my grandma's phone they go why the hell do you have your grandma's phone when you're about to go to english and i'm like it's touche but i kept lying, oh, well, my grandma can't really see that good.

Here we go. I think she put it and slipped it in my bag and she thought it was her purse. They both have zippers. Okay. So I say that. I love you, Meemaw. And they go, oh, no, no, no. That's your phone.

And they just make me. And I literally take it out. And I was so dead set on, like, not being caught with this. I said, I don't even care's your phone. And they just make me, and I literally take it out. And I was so dead set on like not being caught with this. I said, I don't even care about this phone. I left it in the gym floor. And in my mind, that was, I was like ditching the responsibility.

I was like, bro, this clearly isn't mine. I don't care about it. And they were like, do you even love your grandma? Why would you throw your grandma's phone away? And I was just double under the jail, bro. And then the worst part about it, the line starts walking out,

and I literally was like. I grabbed that phone so quick, and I was like, I turned it off. No music coming out. I just went. And I walked in class. I was pissed off all first period. Bro, see, that's the difference between me and you. See, that's your canon event that we both have had. 100%.

But you went about it differently. I've had that same thing right i had a binder right you remember binders it was like the white binder the three rings you open up and it has folders on the inside right a red one there's leather nice okay all right cool all right loser so but and you know in the front part it had that clear thing and you could put different things in there i would cut out high school musical like pictures and i put it i love high school musical it's a great it's a great cinema and so i put that in there i had vanessa i had a lot of zach efron like like a

uncanny amount of shirtless zach it was in my binder right there for everybody to see and i thought i was this is swag you know what i mean that's hot this is pop culture and i remember i left it in the classroom kind of same thing and then we all came back into the class and then the teacher was like yo hey girls whose thing is that and everybody was all the girls were like no no no i was like ten toes down hey that's my shit i was like it's me i liked it i told you at recess i would go and do high school musical choreography with all the girls and i would teach them that they're doing the dance wrong because i spent the hours learning it you know what i mean that's wicked so you just straight up you straight up embodied it and you

just yeah i wore my own merch to sixth grade every day of me with makeup on dressed as a grandma grandma's cookies it was my first youtube video ever made i know yeah and i i was in full makeup and a wig showed me a bit of it i did yeah yeah way back when you said this is the first one i ever made you're like in the kitchen or something right yeah yeah and i had grandma's cookies and i pressed it because he wanted a cookie. That's how the video ended. It was 30 seconds. I might have saw the whole thing. I might have saw the whole thing start to finish. Okay, but speaking of my grandma, right?

Did you ever? Go ahead. No, don't have her. Your grandma. Wait, the one that's dead of cancer. So, yeah, she died of cancer. She's dead. Made me a pallbearer.

Heavy. So, it's a fact. She was. I was like, Meemaw, I saw her on the way out. Somebody else is in here. Like, they gave me the wrong one. Yeah, they bury her with their favorite dumbbells? What the hell is this thing?

He goes, is this real cedar? He's knocking on it. And so, I remember my grandma, she lived on land, right? And on her front porch, there was just a regular foldable WWE chair. Like one of those. Right? But I'm about to go somewhere else where you don't know I'm going. And I was really into preserving artifacts. I wanted to make money.

I've always been like, I to like sell something and make money and so i knew if an old person had something for a while it's probably a value she had this old foldable like chair at the front and it was a regular walmart like wwe chair and i said meemaw how long have you had that and she goes uh like two years and i go oh my god but my mind her two years like two years before she was born it's like 20 it's like 50 yeah so we're when dinosaurs were around at this point so i was like that's a valuable chair and so i remember going to her kitchen and grabbing a trash bag and putting a trash bag over her chair and i'll be like don't touch it anybody we're gonna sell that when meemaw's dead and we're gonna be rich and then you said this to the others yeah and no one smacked you and no but but that's why my family was good they let me go with my imagination i love it and but i remember

i would every time i'd go back to meemaw's house the trash bag would be gone and i would throw up big i'd be like yo is no one trying to get paid out here like i would get hot as hell you're like what who's taking the bags off you're scrubbing it down you're saying in the chair i thought it just felt like a just an aluminum chair that's awfully dumb but you were a child what age i don't remember like six probably oh then you're good yeah and that chair was worth a million dollars to you at that point. And I saw my cat's spot get hit by an 18-wheeler outside of Meemaw's house. You ever seen dynamite? That cat exploded.

Oh, my God. That's something I did not want to visualize. You would have thought that would have been a... Exploding cat. You would have thought I made that cat the way it exploded. Sorry. Like it swallowed a pack of black cats. Okay, you spoke about grandparents, and you reminded me, I choked my grandfather once.

He was asleep in his recliner. He got home from a long day at Lowe's, and he was asleep. You know how old guys sleep. They go... He was asleep like that, mouth wide open. I just saw an episode of a show where someone poured a little liquid into the person's mouth. So I wanted to replicate it, but I had the purest intentions. But the only thing that he had was that thick milk, buttermilk.

So I was like, my grandpa looks a little dry up there. He's dead asleep. I said, let me get him. But he's a tall guy in his recliner and I was young. So I went a little too high and I went. And then he was like. He shot up in the recliner. And he was like, what the fuck?

I choked his ass. I had the purest intention, though, because I was a kid. That's what that reminded me of. I was just trying to, that was about to sound wicked. You're trying to what? I was trying to lubricate his mouth. Because he was asleep and it was a very dry mouth. I was trying to make it wet.

But with buttermilk, I ended up pouring probably about a six ounce shot right down his gullet waterboarding your grandpa is crazy i was gonna ask you have you ever walked into a fight at school walked we had fight week at my school see that's impressive yeah was there anybody recording it yeah could we find this documentary uh well we had a video on youtube and but the ap i told the story 100 times the ap came in and started beating up one of the students and so the video got deleted assistant principal that's sick yeah but did you ever personally like a non-scripted it's not fight week no one's creating a basketball you just walked into like a bathroom and two guys were going at it oh yeah 100 you know what i do none of my business walk out that's probably the first time i've ever embodied that

and i think it's because i was absolutely scared that's the first time i ever embodied your my name's bennett i'm not in it yeah i walked in two guys are swinging for the fits and i said i don't even gotta pee anymore i was like i was like i'm fine i'm completely fine and i walked right back out i started walking fast to my class. I was like, maybe they saw me. Knowing you, I'm surprised you didn't go, stop it! Leave him! I'm like, Jeremiah doesn't deserve that!

Get off of him! No, I literally said, oh, I was like, I'm good. I dried up quick. Okay. What? You dried up? You were wet? I might have pissed myself.

I don't know. Don't remember. I saw on the news this week, right? Mm-hmm. In Dallas, there's a lot of loose animals. What? There's a lot of loose animals, like animals breaking free from zoos and stuff like that. And I've seen videos of, like, bears just running around the street, right?

What are you, in Revelations? What do you mean there's loose bears? If I see a loose Kodiak i'm i i got to what am i gonna let it destroy my it's been all over my for you page like recently on tiktok just animals being loose in neighborhoods and then there's a guy down this i didn't even tell this story holy shit i forgot when i lived in houston literally i lived in an apartment but there's houses by two houses down a guy had a tiger in his house I swear in the middle of downtown Houston

he got arrested as he should he was a part of exotic he was a part of exotic he was a part of everybody slow down he was a part of exotic animal trading what a business

but my question to you is what animal would you hate to see loose on the street? In a fearful state or I'm pissed off that it's out? Just like, holy shit, I don't want to see that animal on the street loose. Oh, a holy shit moment for me would probably be a full-grown male black panther that would be terrifying that would be absolutely scary yeah but more of a pissed off thing a little penguin i'd be mad if i saw you would hate to see a penguin yeah why what are you doing here why are you waddling around because he got loose so far that way he got loose from the zoo exactly what is he supposed to just walk down the sidewalk take him to a freezer it's like to just walk down the sidewalk? Take him to a freezer.

It's like a football. Give him some ice cubes. Take him to a freezer. Build him a new... I'd be pissed if I saw a penguin. I don't know why, really, but it's like... No, you're not supposed to be here. Or a flamingo.

Any bird. Ostrich would be mine. Oh. Ostriches are the devil's creature. You know, my life goal is to rent an ostrich. To do a one-hour ostrich rental. I promise you I won't. And have him chase you without you knowing it.

Cam, Cam, my heart would stop. I'm like, bro, come here. And I open the studio doors, and he's at the bottom of the hallway, and he goes, oh! No, no. Bro, they're fast as shit. I'd get hawked, and I'd die.

Exactly. But what if he was trained that when he gets up to you, he just gives you a nibble? I don't like nibbles. But then as soon as he gets close enough, you go, get back! It back it's like it just dropped dude okay an animal that people have fears of that i don't understand is crocodiles genuinely dead ass you're shitting me yo half our bags and shoes are crocodile you know what i mean steve irwin used to make crocodiles his bitch steve irwin is not

of this world exactly r.i.p to the goats yeah exactly goat talk for real what are what is the fear of crocodiles because have you seen a crocodile on land uh i don't know impenetrable skin 200 razor sharp teeth and it's gonna bite you and roll like donkey kong in a barrel but it's gonna absolutely rip you i don't think they have impenetrable skin. Okay, how would you kill a crocodile then? You tell me. You stab it. Oh, you stab it through its scales

that are as hard as titanium. Its tummy. You think a crocodile is going to roll over like a little dog and go, you just said crocodiles roll. Let that motherfucker roll on me. When he rolls on you, it's because he has your rib cage in his spout. He's going to go whap and then roll.

I think it is irrational to have a fear of crocodile. Okay. You know what? I'm going to play along. Tell me animals that you are afraid of. Ostriches. Crocodile is so much more scary than an ostrich. No, not at all.

An ostrich is a big-ass cotton ball with skinny little twig feet, and it runs quick. It runs 45 miles per hour, and it's 6'7", Cam. Imagine me running 45 miles per hour, Cam. That's fine. You have a soft little belly. You're a big old bird. And they bite and spit. They bite with what?

Their regular stupid little diamond-shaped mouth? A crocodile is going to open up like this. If you get in, you're done. Yay. If you want to get away from a crocodile, guess what you can do? Take a step back.

They're slow as shit. Crocodiles gallop. They literally gallop on land. Are you dumb? Cam, tell me crocodiles don't gallop. Did you not watch Animal Planet as a kid? Steve Irwin?

They would literally be slow as shit and they would be stuck with their mouth open. That's because they're waiting for you to come in. Exactly. You gotta go into that. If that's your fault for being too explorative

to want to go inside of a dino's grill. Okay, one-on-one, you're definitely beating an ostrich before you beat a crocodile. That is 100% fact. Are you nuts?

Peyton, in your naked body and your bare hands, you're gonna kill that ostrich before you can even think about killing a crocodile. First of all, they can float a little bit. Ostr of all, they can float a little bit.

Ostriches. They can float a little bit. And you're saying if I was six... Me, with feathers, dog, and say my neck was a foot longer, and I floated on your bitch ass, you're panicking, dog. And then you try to run away. Why are we in the water? Why are we in water?

I didn't say water. You just said I'm floating. They float. They can float? I said float like in the air. Oh, that's impressive. Exactly. So it's like a stealth team mission.

Exactly. They can just stand and float on you. David Blaine 6'7 with feathers. Are you kidding me? You're definitely, definitely, definitely beating the ostrich before you beat the crocodile. How would you even go about barehand beating a crocodile? Get on its back. Get on its back.

Kim, they don't have good lateral movement. But how would you, what would you do? Sit there and tell a story? Eyeballs, eyeballs, eyeballs. You know what? It's like the same thing as a shark. You can beat a shark now. No, no, I can't swim.

You're more afraid of an ostrich than a shark. Well, I don't go in water. So I'm not really fearful of sharks. I don't go that deep. What would you have a better chance of beating, shark or an ostrich? Ooh, ostrich. Because I would die before the shark got to me cam i can't swim brother i'm drowning before the shark gets to me you need to be studied your fears are so right i'm just saying crocodiles are not that not that scary yes and i'm scared of a lot of shit i'm scared

of basic conversation no okay first off what i'm scared of basic conversation but i don't think that how's your day going fine what are you up to today huh what are you up to you're going no stop please oh my god i want to do something i want to do that so bad what second channel something we have to do that we have to do like an impractical joker setup and put you in awkward situations oh that's one of the videos we're not gonna we're not gonna get into yeah we're not gonna get it but oh my god we have to question for you good morning to you i already know the answer but more this i want to tell a story you've had a time where you were broke right yes okay i'm sitting with my wife the other day for whatever reason she starts going through a snapchat memory okay we get about three four five years deep it's her birthday one

year she pulls out if i had this video i would i'd plug it in i'd show y'all she pulls out the Snapchat memory. Okay. We get about three, four, five years deep. It's her birthday one year. She pulls out, if I had this video, I would plug it in. I'd show y'all. She pulls out the birthday video, okay, of me surprising her before I went to basketball practice as I was in college. Okay. I bought my girlfriend of three years. I bought her for her birthday. Right.

A pack of Lipton Tees, a pack of Lipton Tees, a four pack of body armor lights, sugar free body armors. I bought her two bags of twin snakes and you're not ready for the best gift of it all. What? I bought her a goddamn Bic lighter.

For what? A Bic lighter with an extendo barrel so she can get the candles without burning her finger. First of all, I bought my girlfriend a max of $18 for mile seven for her birthday. Okay, but first of all, why

did you get her so much liquid? She likes her drinks. She was she likes her drinks a six pack of lipton herbal green tea yeah a four pack of body armor lights sugar-free a big lighter with an extendo spout and two bags of twin snakes is she getting high or she's celebrating birth what like i was so and then the worst part of the video she pans up there's a cute little stupid card i bought probably dollar tree she pans up she there's a cute little stupid card I bought, probably Dollar Tree. She pans up, she goes, it says, oh, I have the sweetest boyfriend in the world.

And I go, happy birthday in the video. And you can literally hear her behind camera. She goes, thanks. She was like depressed. She goes, thanks. The next year, I show you now, I go, hell no. There's no way, no way that's what I got you. You probably could have got flowers. No way that's what I got you. So we go up a whole year in Snapchat memories. January 8th, the next year. I shit you not. I go, hell no. There's no way. No way that's what I got you. Brother could have got flowers.

No way that's what I got you. So we go up a whole year in Snapchat memories. January 8th, the next year. The next year. It was a little better to step up. But it was on the bed. It was just like, I got my idea for that year. I'm going to get her like 30 different gifts.

Okay. But of all different sizes and stuff. So I got her like a North Face backpack and had a pair of shoes in it. And the rest was kind of trinkets. Okay. A stimulus check hit. So a stimulus check did. Hello, COVID.

Anyway, so backpack, shoes, main focal point, everything else. Little things. I started looking into the video. These are all things that I'm re-gifting to her. I didn't even buy them. One was a tumbler that her sister made for her. I put it on the bed. One was a picture frame that she bought for me. I put it on the bed. One was a picture frame that she bought for me.

I put it on the bed. And I was so, I was more, was I like that self-conscious about my gift giving back then? Another one, another one was a fucking snack pack of like these snacks that our neighbors bought us. And I took it out of the pantry and put it on the bed for her birthday. So was this a part of the gift? Yeah. Or was this backpack the gift and you were decorating around the gift? I was decorating around it, but I wanted to make it seem like I really went all out

and I got a lot of things. So she was like, this is my shit. Yeah, she goes, I already had that. Another one was a tumbler that she bought herself, but I threw a sticker on it and made it brand new, and I put it on the bed. Dude, I say all that to say i've come a long way man holy hell okay i'm still caught up on your on your drinks that's such so strange to just get her a bunch

of liquid even like tea i don't know if she was going through a time in her life we were having we were having this conversation about drinks uh earlier it is so hard to describe the taste of soda oh my like we were talking about Sprite, right? I didn't know Sprite had a specific flavor. Lemon-lime. Okay, I didn't know that, right? And everybody was looking at me like, are you dumb for not knowing that Sprite is lemon-lime, right?

But why are you making me feel dumb for that? Because I'm going to ask you this. What flavor is Dr. Pepper? There's 23 flavors. It starts with the bourbon cherries. It rotates to the vanilla on the second swig. No, I'm saying regular Dr. Pepper. No, I don't know.

But you were dumb for the Sprite because it literally says lemon-lime soda. Okay, no, I get that. That was me not looking. But no one, I bet, any amount of money to any person living, they can't describe the taste of soda or the flavor of soda. Dark cola. Yeah, you can't. Like a Coca-Cola.

Diet Coke can't describe the flavor. Sometimes metal. Excuse me? I get a little bit of metal when I drink DC. Just a tad bit. That's the can. That's the can. You pour it in a cup, you'll be fine.

Okay. But like Fanta, you can't, obviously. It's an orange soda. It's orange. Yeah. You know what I mean? But any dark flavor, like what is the flavor of dark flavored soda? And you have to guess.

What is it? I would say syrup. Well, yeah, but. No, like maple. Maple. You know, like same flavor you're getting from maple syrup? Like that. I don't think of, I don't think of pancakes when I'm drinking a Dr. Pepper.

Pancakes aren't syrup. Pancakes are bread. You put syrup on pancakes. It's not a prerequisite. You can't say you think of pancakes. You can't drink syrup and say, oh, that tastes like pancakes. Name one time in your life you've made a spoonful of syrup to put the medicine go down. You're not what's-her-name.

You're not what's-her-name. I didn't get that reference. What's-her-name? The awfully white movie and she does a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine. You're not what's-her-name. You're not what's-her-name. I didn't get that reference. What's-her-name? The awfully white movie, and she does a spoonful of sugar. Helps the medicine. Mary Poppins. You're not Mary Poppins.

You don't drink syrup by itself. The only time you've used it is on breakfast day. Tell me. Look me in my soul. Look me in my soul and tell me you've had syrup by itself. Did I ever say that? No. I said it doesn't taste like pancakes. You can't say you taste syrup and be like, oh, that tastes like pancakes. I said you i ever say that no i said it doesn't taste like pancake you can't say you taste syrup and be like oh that tastes like pancakes i said you can't say that but i'm saying what

name something else you put syrup on bacon okay bacon but is that pancakes no but you said there it's not a prerequisite it's not syrup has to be on some you've never took a spoonful of syrup i said it's not a prerequisite for pancakes. I thought you were talking about the syrup. No. Okay. Well, then I apologize. Thank you. I was saying if you were to describe the taste of Coke, right?

Just a regular Coke. It's like a loosened syrup. It's like somebody took a syrup and put it in a whisk and went like that. Okay. No. Do you ever get a little bit of pepper from your Coke? Like a tad bit. No.

See? Sometimes a little spice. The spice. How you talk about when you... of pepper from your Coke? Like a tad bit. No. See? Sometimes a little spice. The spice, how you talk about when you... Yeah, the spice. Sometimes I get that pepper, though. It's only in the bottle. I agree. What is...

What the hell... Okay, you're going to piss me off, and you know I have crippling ADHD. What is the flavor of soda? Of dark sodas? Dr. Pepper's? Cola's? I think I just asked. Pepsi.

I think I just asked. No, you did, but I'm saying we have to get to the bottom of it. We're not going to figure it out here. No, I know, but someone let us know in the comments. Let us know what the hell the actual taste is, because I have no clue. But Sprite is 100% lemon lime. But when you think about it, it doesn't even taste like lemon lime. That's what I'm saying.

So that's why I was confused. But the only reason you all know it is because it's on the can. Yeah, they're giving us poison. Let's just say that. They're giving us poison. You know what I don't like that you do on planes? And I never brought it up to you. And holy shit, I'm glad you brought that up.

Why the hell on planes do you order ginger ale? Because it's fantastic. If you drink ginger ale without being sick, you're, if you drink ginger ale, you gotta be senior citizen or deathly ill. When's the last time you had a GA? Whenever I had a tummy ache. See, that's what's wrong with you. You only use it for its beneficiaries.

You only use it to get something out of it. If you drink a ginger ale on a sober, just easy-going day, it is gas. Dude, drinking ginger ale makes me feel like I'm back in Jim Crow. It doesn't feel like of this time. I shouldn't be drinking this you know what i mean like like cam has to use that different bathroom like i can't go in there with him and i have a ginger ale that makes no sense at all but i kind of feel it feels like an aged drink it feels like i'm drinking something that's not like our grandparents yeah founded ginger ale But, bro, it's fire.

There shouldn't be VR and ginger ale in the same timeline. Like that's not right. You know what I mean? It's just not right. Someone switch the timelines. Bro, I'm telling you, drink it on an easy – first off, it might be the goat of sodas because it's fantastic by itself. Not – okay.

Not the goat. No, no, no. Ginger ale is the best soda ever. Not standing on it. I'm not standing on it. Not the greatest of all time, but I'm saying, Dr. Pepper, okay. Not the gold. No, no, no. Ginger Ale's the best soda ever? Not stand on it. I'm not standing on it. Not the greatest of all time, but I'm saying, Dr. Pepper,

you don't get that. My tummy hurts. I need a Dr. Pepper. Dr. Pepper's for kids. Dr. Pepper's a kid soda. It's too sweet. It's too sweet. It's too sweet.

You either have to be deep south, like deep, deep south, like sundown, or you gotta be prepubescent dr pepper's too much i love you dr pepper too much though i can't just enjoy that with a chicken nugget what your teeth don't sound like spongebob shoes after i don't okay coke broke diet cokes this like oh god no diet coke is a gentleman's drink that is a gentleman's drink don't is a gentleman's drink. Don't you do that. Okay, I'm going to name sodas, and you tell me which is better, Diet Coke or Plank, whatever

it is. Diet Coke. Diet Coke or Dr. Pepper. Diet Coke. Diet Coke, Ginger. Are you stupid? Don't even. Oh, that pissed me off.

Sorry. Diet Coke or Sprite. Diet Coke. Diet Coke or Coke Zero. Diet Coke. You got to be on, like like Coke Zero's fantastic Coke Zero's God's nectar you gotta be a diabetic

what? to like it you gotta be a diabetic you have to I don't know if I can say that no no I'm not gonna I'm not letting you do this

it's not a healthy drink no no neither is Diet Coke Diet Coke is the most healthy drink that's why everybody has it for such a creative for such an out of the-the-box thinker, you think there's no sugar in Diet Coke?

You think there's actually no sugar? Or is there no sugar that they're relaying to the FDA? There's no sugar that is being said on the can? I think there's methamphetamines in Diet Coke, so I'm not worried about the sugar. How is it the healthiest drink if you're drinking meth? How is it that you think there's methamphetamines, but it's the healthiest drink?

All ginger ale does is make you feel good 36,000 feet in the sky and fix a tummy ache But what does that taste on your tongue? It tastes good Do you drink water then? What is the taste of ginger ale? Ginger ale is like a It's like an English pub

It's like an old English pub with a hint of cider Like a little apple It's good It's good It's gingery That's why you like it It's your lineage Okay, no you pissed me

off like something okay no something you actually do that pissed me off this could almost be like like a pet peeve the other day i went in your bathroom wasn't supposed to but i did it anyway okay you hit my bathroom i went in your house i went to the third floor i went straight to the bathroom because i was looking in your closet. Okay. You came in afterwards, but something that absolutely, it literally made the middle of my back stand up and itch. Your shower, your shower is the, it is the actual definition of hell for me.

How? What's wrong with my shower? One of my biggest pet peeves, and I don't know if it's my crippling ADHD, I don't know what it is. When bottles are empty and they can literally fall over non-stop like shampoo bottles conditioner they're just empty there's no integrity there's no backbone that pisses me off and you my friend a solo man in this shower had seven i'm gonna say to say that one more time seven empty on its back bottles of method men body wash seven

holy shit i know you own a trash can throw them away holy shit i'm so sorry to air your business out but it you don't play that game it made me itch go for it go for it well let me explain myself first of all yeah i don't either i run through body wash in the shower ungodly fast how much that's my question what is the appropriate amount of body wash to put on your on your hand oh three seconds oh my god oh my god you're putting it on your what you're putting it on your what? You're putting it on your what? On your loofah You do a loofah? You don't use a loofah

I use my hands You use your bare hand Okay so What am I supposed to use? Operation Why Is He Stinky Found the cause I get in You're not

You get in with what? You're scratching yourself to death? Yes That's not good for your skin irritation Or your overall hygiene. So what I do is I pour like, and it takes up my, I don't want to see my hand without it having a jelly filling. So I have it fully on my hand and I slap.

Yeah. They said I get a full thing and I just squ in that thing no dad's because it warps around it like sometimes if it's a really good one i go for this i'm like oh it's on my lower back today like um it's like this i go and i don't want to see like it's all like filled up and i go is that not regular what am i supposed to do first things first hey Is that not regular? What am I supposed to do?

First things first, hey, instead of pleasuring yourself and playing Dungeons & Dragons with your own genitalia, let's just try to clean it first. And the first thing to clean it is to use something that cleanses and cleans your skin. Okay, I had an exfoliator hand thing. I smelled that shit after three uses. That can't be good. Better than my hand. It's so much better than your hand.

How? It smells like little rank ass. No, your ass smells like rank ass. And you're probably going... Did you put your scrub right on your first use? Yeah. What do you know? How am I supposed to wash my ass then? You think your ass isn't going to smell like ass?

You're complaining about the smell. You went right downstairs. You went straight to the gooch. And so I'm supposed to use it again? No, but you wash it off. Wash it off? You wash it off. How to wash it off with what?

Sit back and relax, Junior. Wait, can I explain how I was... I didn't finish how I... After my... Go for it. Yeah, honest to God. What's step two? I fill up, slap it around. If it's a good one, I'll feel it after my... Go for it. Yeah, honest to God. What's step two? I fill up, slap it around.

If it's a good one, I'll feel it on my lower back. And I'm like... And then so I slap it on, right? And it's sitting there. And I got to rush before it drips down my thighs, right? Sure. And so then I get my nails. And I just scratch in between my webbing.

And I go like this. I don't ever want to dab you up again. I don't ever want to dab you up again. That means you're... Look atap you up again you're that means look at my fingernails that's what's under there oh my god oh never mind it's about the same length your middle finger looked extremely long I just spit sorry I don't ever want to dap you up again because I've okay this might sound like an exfoliator scrub with my nails I've seen corners of your webbing yeah and that's a dark it's like pink and discolored it's pink discolored there's no a pink oh it's like if you cut open my leg and looked inside of it like on the first layer of

skin that's what it is that's called irritation oh really from your nails you're chafing while you're soaking wet make it make sense you you need the baby oil you do you need baby oil baby powder johnson johnson you need it all i had uh athletes foot till it's 10 there'd be like little white dots right here on my foot all the time it would feel so good to scratch and i'll be like mom get my spot and she would scratch my spot you are you are the absolute you are the over the counter i'm gonna wait till it's gone warrior yeah you had athletes foot for a decade on and off oh that makes it better yeah on and off it comes seasonal i think i'm prone to like problems yeah like it starts with this

dude like it used to be a celebration when i'd go to my doctor like my dentist visits when i was forced to go like ever since i was adult i don't go when i was forced to go, ever since I was an adult, I don't go. When I was forced to go as a kid, it would be an achievement if I had under four cavities. Okay, I had jaws, mouths, too. I had silver teeth out the ass. No, it was after my silver teeth. Literally, I had full adult teeth. So you went through hell, got all capped up, pain and all, and then you said, to hell with that guy, I'm doing it again?

No, it's not even that. I think I'm just prone. I think I have weak enamel to hell with that guy. I'm doing it again. No, it's not even that. I think I'm just prone. I think I have weak enamel. Oh, that is. Are you diabetic? I don't know. I haven't gotten tested. You pre-diabetic?

I don't think so. Is diabetes running the gene code? I don't think so. I don't ask anybody their medical history. That is crazy. The You Should Know Podcast. Truck Month is on at Chevrolet.

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That's the toilet. That's a big part. As Meemaw would say, who's dead, the commode. My Meemaw said commode, too. That's an old white lady thing commode that's bad you know preston says what about to go on the porcelain throne he goes porcelain throne to dethrone my coffee foundation okay i'm kidding i love you a lot of people have weird toilet things right what's your favorite part about the toilet when the poop leaves my ass what are you talking about guy but like something more spontaneous and fun like

when i'm clogged and it really leaves quick when i think it's gonna be a three minute poop and it goes falls right out no but you don't like some people like getting fully naked that's their favorite part they get fully naked. That's their favorite part. They get fully naked, they feel everything. The wind. You're going to hell. You get butt naked to take a poop. Sometimes when it's too much.

When you're having a hard time. And then some people like watching TikTok on the toilet. That's some people's favorite part. Getting away from their families. They hide in the bathroom for a long time. Oh my God. Are you okay? You get butt naked scrolling through TikToks to get away from their families they hide in the bathroom for a long time oh my god are you okay you get butt naked scrolling through tiktoks to get away from your family jesus christ guy no okay but my favorite my favorite part of the of the of my oh so those weren't no no those are hypothetical okay stories i've heard before yeah you heard my favorite part about number two, sitting on the toilet, right, is Poseidon's kiss.

Excuse me? Your favorite part about sitting down to poop is when that log cabin drops in there and it goes. It gives you a little smooch on the sphinx. Dude, isn't it so refreshing? K-Rob knows what I'm talking about. K-Rob looks like he was struck by lightning. He is absolutely terrified. Oh, my God.

You're sitting there because my body overheats when I'm struggling and pushing because I've never had a smooth transition, and if I do, I thank the Lord. What are you pooping? It literally feels like cactus sometimes. So, what? Oh, what? Have you seen my butt? It's tight. it's hard to get things in and out stop stop stop what do you mean in kane brown knows what i'm talking about in and out what do you mean in

kane brown knew what i was talking about sure did we had to talk about our suction cup butts anyway shout out to kane and nikki how are you doing? But okay, when you're sitting there, right, and you're really hot, and you're pushing for dear Heavenly Father, I've scratched the porcelain on my tub before, and you're biting on your shirt to the point where your gums bleed, right, and you're sweating, and you're saying, please, please, please, over and over in your head. And then you get it out, and then just Poseidon just gives you a smooch on your...

Isn't that so refreshing? I've never clenched my fist at a bowel movement. You animal. Is that so not? You didn't. Oh, so not never have I willeth. That's so strange. You just said, when you're sitting there and you're getting ready and you're bracing,

and then you go and you scratch the shit and you bite your teeth. You need to get your stomach pumped let's just start with that because something's not right i always think of katora coming up and kissing my butt who from the avatar the water bender she's going she's like making it she's like relieving my butt with her hand not her physical hand but she's controlling the water under my sphincter and giving me a kiss. Either you are ill, like you have a true sickness, or your asshole is like the needle of a pen. It is either the smallest hole ever, or you literally have something going on.

You've had a blinking contest with my sphincter. I've blinked with those old toothless down there. Speak to them, toothless. That's... Wow is that is remarkable beyond measure that needs to be studied it's relieving it's like a cold pack when you have the flu i have i thought i had a bidet so i have like this little tube next to my next to my toilet it's like a little like wiry thing and it has like a you go and you and i'm so for like two months i was using as a bidet until the point where i was starting to get marked up in my butt like it was starting it was so much psi going into me and it almost came out

of my mouth one time how powerful i was like i was like sea world attraction i was like a dolphin you could swallow a sword it'll go out the back exactly but then i and then i was like a dolphin. You could swallow a sword and it would go out the back end. Exactly. But then I was like, this can't be right. I shouldn't be feeling this way in my butthole. And I figured out it was just a water toilet scraper. And I was using that for the inside of me. You know that sumbitch was shooting hard. Oh, my God. It could...

It was like the carnival game. He was trying to keep it on the bullseye? Yeah, they use that... Exactly what they... Your asshole's a carnival game! You have a carnival ass! Poseidon's not kissing, Poseidon's trying to win a plush toy, he's sitting there... He's got it locked down, he's like, we almost got him, boys.

He's in there. Oh! Oh! You're jumping and shit. Okay, and I had this debate. I had this debate with my mom, which is crazy. In Austin, I had this debate with my mom. What are we doing?

She said, every time I've gone number two, I've gone number every single time and she goes that's so weird no that's very normal that's so normal that is about as normal as they can get no but but my dad said me me neither like he said sometimes yeah like if i'm really just if i'm going for glory i'll do two in one but normally he's like if i gotta shit i'm shit if i gotta piss i'll piss he said he doesn't have control over your body yeah but like even if i don't have to pee i'll get some drips there will be some drip i gotta take it out of the water okay i'm like i'm like he had a fire man i'm like come on it's oh i've been yeah and sometimes i'll accidentally flush when I do that.

It'll hit the little thing. You know what I mean? I've been caught in a damn urinal with denim on, and I've been sitting there pissing, and then it starts coming down. I said, oh, I got to get to the toilet. Oh, wait a minute. Oh, yeah.

I've never began a piss and ended with a poo. I think my pee and poop are in are in perfect unison synchronization okay so you've never done one without the other i literally just went just now five minutes ago to take a piss realized that i felt some pebbles i set my ass down that's so but you also have like the bowel control of a toddler exactly you like cam will go oh shit i got a shit like it came out of nowhere like that not normal. You should be feeling that concoction brewing. No, I feel my poop. Yours is lined with silver on your inside of your stomach.

So you never know. That's why you're sitting there fighting for your life. It's like a cannonball. You shit ski balls. That's what you shit. Oh my God. Another car. You have a carnival ass.

We have found it. Your ass is that of a carnival. Fun to play with. And if you do it right, you get a prize. You won a prize. You've won a couple prizes. He's gone home with some stuffed animals. You know what I mean? Yeah, that came from my ass right there.

Right there. Mr. Woody. No way. Speaking of our stomach problems. Don't say don't say our i got a clean system over here firing on all engines all cylinders you know it's weird that you and your wife do but we'll talk about this later y'all watch each other poop cam literally will go into the bathroom when liz pooping knowing she's pooping he'll go oh babe you look so cute oh i've given my wife a forehead kiss while she's taking a shit that's so great like i understand y'all love each

other and y'all say that's how comfortable we are, but that's weird, dog. Whether you own a bustling hair salon, a painting company that just landed a big job, or the hottest new bakery in town, you need business insurance that can keep up with your evolving needs.

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Like, that's not normal. I'm not gonna lie, I never did it before her. Ever. Well, you didn't have the opportunity to. That's also true. But I'm saying,

even at the beginning stages, I was like, what are you doing? I'm shitting. I was like, I'm vulnerable. I was like, you can see my inner thigh right now. Get out. But then she just made it such a norm. She was like, dude, I grew up, me and my brother and my mom, we'd have to be getting ready for school.

My mom would be getting ready for work all in one bathroom. She's like, my mom would be in there sudding up, Gabe's butt naked, taking a shit, and I'm brushing my teeth. And I'm like, y'all are a circus. That sounds like... That's disgusting. What like y'all are a circus that sounds like gusting what i was gonna say that sounds like gypsy rose's house the oof the background no okay but that is that you don't think that is strange no it is it is like that's not like almost to the point where like i'm nervous for when the kid comes around

you know what i mean like like he'll be in the bassinet rocking i'll be taking a shower and it'll be pooping. Like, I don't want Malachi to be exposed to that. He's going to. You know who's mom is. Liv's a... There's a lot of parts about Liv that are very clean. A lot that are strange.

Very strange. I mean, you don't really realize it until you do. Love lived to death. Sometimes she has the shins of a middle school boy. Oh, my God. Sometimes her lower extremities, her her legs resemble a very young cub like a bear she looks grizzly as shit sometimes don't facetime me and they'll be like uh they'll be a camera will facetime me in the bed with levy but like dude it feels like i'm laying next to at

nine that sounds weird actually i can't say that oh no no no no no you said it oh no don't put the words in my mouth you don't put the words in my mouth. Don't put the words in my mouth. Never said it once. I'll swear on everything. No, I said it. But it doesn't sound good. It doesn't sound good.

But you know what I mean. It feels like I'm laying next to a small, prepubescent cousin of mine. Yeah. Like, just prickly hair starting to cut. Like, we're watching a good film. Well, you know what we mean. They can't clip this and put it out of context. Yeah, you know what we're saying, you creeps.

Yeah, just like a but speaking of stomach stuff on patreon a couple weeks ago me and cam pierce and cj we all did a period pain and birth pain simulator and it was one of the best things we've ever filmed and this is the kind of stuff you get to see on patreon and you'll get to see on patreon more because we're really about to revamp patreon in 2025 and the stuff that y'all get on there is going to be insane and a lot of y'all want more than one episode a week you technically already get that now but you might get early access and uncensored and ad free hello hello on patreon coming in 2025 so this is a sneak peek of what you get on patreon you get the full thing right here if you like this, go over to Patreon

and enjoy. The You Should Know Podcast. Samsung Vision AI televisions transform screens into intelligent solutions. From the shows that make us laugh to those that make us cry. Now, your TV knows you more than ever. Whether it's

reviving old memories with AI upscaling or seamless hands-free control with universal gestures, this isn't just television. It's a whole new vision because it isn't just about what's on. It's about who's watching. Learn more about Samsung Vision AI televisions at samsung.com. All right, we're going to do a period pain simulator right now. And I'm very nervous. Actually, I'm not. I'm like half and half, if I'm being honest.

I just honestly just don't know what to expect. Yeah, I have no clue. But it can't be too bad. It can't be too bad. It can't be. Like, it's going to suck a little bit, but not like, ah! Yeah. I don't think I'll scream once.

I think the most is I'll bite my teeth down. Here we go. So Cam, you put it on me. Oh, I'm putting it on you? That's kind of sensual. All right. I'm going to take my shirt off. You're welcome.

All right. Right, guy, guy. Where are you putting these at? No, I'm not looking at your body. I'm saying you look like an uncle because you're shirtless, but you have slacks. You have dicky pants with no shirt. Looks like you're about to watch the Green Bay Packers. I'm actually getting nervous now.

I don't like this. Drink a Bush Light. Here we go. First of all, what are you doing? You're going down here. What are you doing? You're not going down here? I guess, you creep.

I thought it was right there on the... Well, yeah. You're just going to have a little hair on it. Oh yeah it's cold you spit on my arm he's getting so nervous no here we go okay okay okay we're working we're working this is way lower than i expected it was gonna go show you damn near showed me your douche and said put it on ah all right here we go okay so okay we have to do uh we have to do an honoree a man what word an honorary honorable honorary man's code there's no cheating the other person okay i'm so i'm actually so scared right dude okay do you agree with me yes will not cheat me no you're going i'm gonna shit i have to have a poop you're going first. I'm going to shit. I have to poop.

You're going first. Okay. Start it on one and then we'll work our way up. Oh, my God. There's like different hands and motions. Okay. Cam, Cam, Cam, Cam. I'm not going to do it.

I don't know what to click. Make sure it's not on level 10. Dude, level one. Oh, okay. Is it coming on? Level one. I feel it only on this one, though. I only feel it on my lower left. Oh. Oh, okay. Is it coming on? Level one. I feel it only on this one, though. I only feel it on my lower left.

Oh. Do it again? Okay, now I feel it everywhere. Okay, slow down. Slow down. That's level one. Okay, but you got to say level one before you do it. Okay.

So this right here. Wait, that's a rubbing. Let's do that. Wait, let's do... It feels kind of good. Let's do mode. We're going to do that. All right, here we go

Yeah Do you feel it? It's a pulse though I want it to be like a Okay Give it a pulse The first one you had That was good

It was? Yes But it just wasn't on all four Now you have it on only This bottom left one Clicking a lot of buttons So many buttons Okay

Here we go There he goes Okay So Yeah okay That's level one. Okay. All right.

It got hotter. Okay. So. It's getting stronger, Cam. I'm relaxed. You got to say what you're doing. I'm telling you. So can you feel all four pads?

Yes. Okay. That is level one. Okay. Okay. Describe level one. It's like a little tummy massage. It's like a little tummy massage.

Okay. You are now going to level two. Okay. Okay. All right. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. You're on level two. Okay. Okay. All right. Hold on. Hold on. You're on level two.

Hold on. It's not feeling in my pee pee, dog. Hold on. You're on level two. Okay. It's in my leg. It's in my leg. Do you want me to stop?

Stop it. Okay. Holy shit. That's two? That's level two. What's it go to? We can go to level ten. No, go to three. Go to two. That's level two. What's it go to level ten? No go to three go to three. Yeah

Okay Okay, what? okay okay what okay tell me okay maybe a new setting maybe we try to keep it where it's at I like this okay but maybe maybe you said you like it are you visible where it's at you it's fine just keep sweating so much you look like a naked baby okay that was level three and my knees I felt it in my knees dog so we're gonna we're gonna try to work up to four I think I'm ever erectile dysfunction after this we're gonna have to try to work up to four all right, okay? Here we go ready Oh, damn. It's off. It's off. You got to say what you're doing.

It takes a lot of clicks. Say what you're doing. That was level four. Okay, but say this is level five, then do it. Okay. I said we're going to- It's still going. I said we're going-

Okay, we're going to get you back to one. We're back to level one. We're back to level one. Breathe, relax, stop sweating. Can you say level five and then click the button because you're going, ready? Level five. This is level five. I'm freaking out. I got you. I got you. Okay, so level four. We're at four. We're going, ready? Level five. This is level five. I'm freaking out.

I got you. I got you. Okay. So level four. We're at four. We're going to try to get to five before tapping out. You're on level one right now. Relax.

Okay. Give me the sign. Give me the go when you're okay to attempt level five. Okay. I'm ready. Say this is level five and then do it. Okay. Are you ready?

For what? I was going to say it. I was going to say it. Okay. Are you good? Are you good? Are going to say it. I was going to say it. Okay. Are you good? You're rested? I'm as good as I can be. I'm nervous about the health of my legs after this.

Okay. Yeah. Don't know if you should be feeling it. I don't know. It's like I'm locking it up. All right. Here we go. There's so much sweat coming.

Oh, my God. It's like it's going to wax me. That's not sweat. That's glue, brother. No. You're going to look like a hairless cat okay meow okay here we go we are now going to level five are you ready no but yes here we go level five okay okay okay okay okay i'm taking it off i'm taking it off i'm taking it off bear with me bear with me i'm taking it off i'm taking it off okay it's, okay, okay. Okay, I'm taking it off, I'm taking it off, I'm taking it off. Bear with me, bear with me, I'm taking it off, I'm taking it off.

Okay. It's okay. Okay. It's so many... Okay. Okay. Okay. Dog, what the f*** is that?

There's no way you'll feel that. No, that's bullshit, because now I'm getting terrified. I should have went first. Cam, dog, it feels like literally someone's taking those electric sticks. I can't see. It's like someone's taking those electric sticks and being in me. I feel like all in my webbing and behind my legs. Yeah, I think you might be getting like a, what's it called?

Carpal tunnel, but in the legs. Fucking leg tunnel. Okay. Level six. Do you want to attempt level six? Yes. This is your verbal commitment to moving on. Verbal consent, level six, level six. Here we go. He can't even speak or see. He's like, level seven, go.

Okay, level six in three, two, one. Oh! Stop, stop, stop, stop. He couldn't even make it. He couldn't make it. Oh, my God.

No. Oh, no, no, no, no. No, you don't look good, brother. We got to end it. You don't look healthy. I don't want to keep going. I don't want to keep going. I don't know.

It's more of a fear thing. I don't know if I'm supposed to be feeling this way. There's so much liquid on your chest. What the fuck was that look? No, bro. If you're trying to look around the room and see stars, we're done. Okay. I think the lights are too hot.

Okay. Level six. Yeah. That's good. That's solid. Let's get them off. No, no, no. Let's go to ten.

No, no, no. Give me ten. No. Give me ten. No, no. Give me ten. Are you sure? Are you sure?

Yeah, give me ten. I don't know if that's safe. Give me ten. Give me ten. I don't know if that's good for you. Give me 10. All right, we're going to 10 right now. Oh, no, they're off.

Did he get to 10? He got to 7. No, then it doesn't count. Give me the 10. Okay, we're going to 10 in three. Let's go to 10. We're going to 10. I can't.

I have to click the button. Stop. It's gradual. Here we go. We're going to 10. Brace, buddy. Brace click the buttons up. It's gradual. Here we go. We're going to ten. Brace, buddy. Brace, buddy. No, no, no, no, Cam.

Okay, keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Shit. Shit. Shit. End it. End it.

End it. We're coming off. We're coming off. We're coming off. And the worst part is that was only a level nine and eight. I can't get there all the way, brother. I can't do it. I love you too much.

I got to apologize to some of my exes. Yeah, you do. This is what it feels like. Okay. Oh. There's no more stimulation going. He is crying. Dog, no, that's no joke, bro.

Oh, my God. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way it's that bad. It feels like the tip is on fire right now. Oh, God, no. I think you might have went too low, man. I think you, I think,

I think it was getting some veins. Yeah, let me help you. Oh. Let me help you. Here we go. Oh. Dude.

Kim, that's not right. I know, brother. I know. Ow, it burns and itches. Oh, no, you might, we might have done something wrong. I go, because we

didn't read shit. Oh, no, I'm nervous about getting wrong. I go, because we didn't read shit. Oh, no, I'm nervous about getting these bottom ones off. Here we go. That's why. Oh, there's like one hair. A little appetizer. Holy shit. But the higher you go on the thing, the more you feel it up top.

It's the lower ones that you feel in your cooter. Dude, it feels like my cooter's on fire, bro. Oh, my God. Okay. So, before we transition to me, Pete, immediate thoughts. Treat it like a post-game interview. Just talk, whatever comes to mind. Immediate thoughts is I think my next coitus experience, it's not going to work.

I think I'm going to need some honey packs or some blue chew. I don't know. I shouldn't have felt it there yeah you might have went too low i think it had a mind of it it started going like this in my pants it was like help help help help help it was just jerking over the place good morning to you and then it was like, who is she? Who is she? And then when it got to 10, it felt like everything in here started going here. No, bro. It's the lower ones that it was shocking down here and my legs lost control. What if, like, not to scare you, but what if you, like, shit blood later? What would you think?

Oh, my God. I'd be like, I'm really on my period. Oh, man. No, for real all right oh you gotta teach me how to use this thing so basically yeah this is the this is the hard part so it's already on the right setting it's on setting one so this is channel a channel b so you're gonna hit a you have to hit plus so that's level one you hit b plus so now i'm at an even level one and then so to turn it down just minus minus yeah a minus b minus yeah and

you gotta go quick bro because i know your fingers aren't the best but you've got you've got to work with me okay due to the fact i have a wife i'm not gonna go completely shirtless but i will apply that's only for her you freaks yeah here we go no don't you even say that okay oh my god bro yeah there's that's bullshit this can't be if that's bullshit. This can't be. That's just, oh, shit. Liv's legs are inoperating. She's like, no. No, it's literally like I was getting shocked in my legs. That's what it's like.

Oh, my God. I'm already getting nervous, bro. Okay. And how do I hit start? Like, to make it go is the middle button? Yeah. Ow! Stop.

No, no. No, it was more of shock. It was scare. You turned it on, but it was on my thumb. It was on my thumb. That's why I threw it. It was on my thumb. I didn't expect... I'm drooling. Oh, he's gonna be bad. No, I didn't expect...

He's gonna have a baby shower. Holy... Yeah, honestly. Ah, just turn it off, you f***ing a**hole! Bro, it's scaring me. Turn it off, bro! What are you doing? Is it off? Oh, Oh? Oh? Yeah? Okay, I'm so soft. This is gonna be good. I honestly gotta go check this is a Okay guys, so now I'm applying the pads. We're supposed to go low and then too high.

You had to wake her up? Okay. I have the two lower abdomens applied. Don't touch it. Alright, guys. We're all padded up, strapped up. Okay, I have the two lower abdomens applied. Don't touch it. Holy shit. All right, guys. We're all padded up, strapped up. Peyton's about to give me the period cramp or labor pain simulator.

We got the pads on. Two are low on the V-line. Two are in the middle abdomens. Okay, so how do I do this again? I'm not going to lie. More of my scaredness is coming from you. Okay, it's on. It's on. I'm feeling level one. I'm feeling level one.

I'm feeling level one. Okay. Now we're going to go to level two. You should probably wait. Just give me a second to talk. Give me a second to talk. Give me a second to talk. That was level two.

Give me a second to talk. No, it's not on level two. No, something's on now. There it's level two. Okay, something else is on. Give me a sec. That's level two. Level two. Amy. There's not on level two. No, something's on now. There it's level two. Okay, something else is on. Give me a sec. That's level two. Level two, A and B.

There's a pain in there. There's a pain. It's... Okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay. Just give me a second. Wait a second. I haven't moved it.

Turn it off. Why do I turn it off? You're not even letting me speak. You're not letting me speak. Turn it off. Turn it off. There's something in my left side. There's something in my left side. There's something in my left side.

It's off. It's off. I'm feeling a tube I've never felt before. Okay. Okay. Sweat has started. I got to get my initial thoughts before we go into it. Okay.

I'm just like, ah. So, I might have got an early taste of level two. I'm feeling a tube I didn't know was inside of me. It's like extracting something out. But we got two on the V line, two about early taste of level two. I'm feeling the tube. I didn't know it was inside of me. It's like extracting something out, but we got two on the V line to about the middle of the abs here. Quick peek. The two other ones are kind of low, so I'm definitely scared about the lower ones.

So remember when you turn it on, yeah, you're going to go, all right, we're at level whatever. Yeah. Then you hit that level. I experienced it. When I scream, you decrease the level. Okay. We're going to go, all right, we're at level whatever. Yeah. Then you hit it to that level. I experience it.

When I scream, you decrease the level. Okay. We're going to, are you ready? I will rip these off or break the device if you do me dirty because I did you as an honest man. I got you. You ready for level three? What happened? No.

Give me a natural turn. That's level three. This is, now you're completely level three. How are we feeling? Yeah, yeah, we're feeling it. We're feeling it. What, the top ones are, the bottom ones. It's the bottom, the top ones are like kind of shush.

You feeling it? Yeah. Okay, the top ones aren't, the top ones aren't as bad. I don't know if I should flex. Should I go to level four now? No, you should take it down. I took it down every time for you. Okay. Take it down, okay. Okay. There you go to level four now? No, you should take it down. I took it down every time for you. Okay.

Take it down. Okay. Okay. There you go, Kim. He's doing good. He's doing good. Okay. The top ones, the top ones feel like I'm doing an intense exercise.

Yeah. The bottom ones feel like torture. Yeah. So your legs, how are your legs feeling? Is that legs activated? I was feeling a natural clench. Yeah. Okay.

How'd you sit? Because I think I naturally keep trying to straighten out, but then I curl up in the ball. All right, so what are we doing? Level four now? We're going to go to four, and you have to click them quick and get to four. I'm trying, brother. And then take them off.

Level four, ready? No. Something's off now. It's back on. It's back on. Level four, here we go. Yeah, I know. No, it's back on.

The bottom one. It's the bottom one. I can't even. I can't. I can't talk when it's on. I can't talk when it's on on. The bottom one. It's the bottom one. I can't even. I can't. I can't talk when it's on. I can't talk when it's on. My neck's hurting. Okay.

Okay, I got level four. I passed level four. Okay, you're level four. Ow. Okay. Because I clenched so hard on my neck. Okay. Okay.

Level four thoughts. Okay, it's. I didn't think the jumps would be that significant. I should know based off yours. Okay. Okay. Level four thoughts. Okay. I didn't think the jumps would be that significant. I should know based off yours. The jumps are significant. Yeah. I can definitely tell. Four is a different beast from three.

Five is going to be a different beast from four. Okay. I tried to go fast on that one, but it's the switching over to B. Yes. It's the hard part. That's the part that's ass. Because when it's just one of them, you can kind of tame it. As soon as that second one kicks in, you're just like, fuck. Yeah, 100%.

Okay. You ready for level five? Ready for five. Here we go. Here we go. Tell me when it's coming. Ah! Ah!

I ripped my pants! I ripped my pants! I felt the butt! This is level five. Ah! No! No! No!

Stop! Ah! No! Stop! Turn it off! Turn it off. Turn it the f*** off. Payton! Payton, bro, I f***ing said turn it off when I say it.

I did. It literally felt like a f***ing alien was crawling out of me, bro. Oh. Oh. I turned it off, bro. Oh. Oh. I turned it off, bro. Oh. Oh. Oh, wow. Level five's different. Oh, man.

Oh, I will. Hey, I got all eight. Oh, I have a taste in my mouth. I have a weird taste in my mouth. Okay. Describe it. Level, that was five? Oh, bro. How are you talking? My biggest, I was trying to yell i couldn't even spit i was like oh man the bottom the bottom ones are bad yeah i'm telling you that's the one oh the bottom ones are bad bro my stomach literally felt like something was like going

like trying to escape bro bro. Oh, shit. Okay. All right, give me five seconds. Give me five seconds. I'm going to take a deep breath. So we're going to level five or six? Five? Six.

That was five. Hey, when I tell you, I didn't say start. I didn't say start. Ow! Ow! Ow! That's level six. He turned it off on the top ones.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Oh, my God. Oh, it off on the top ones. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Oh! Ow! Oh, my God. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No. Oh, man.

Oh, man. Oh, man. Bro, you're only on six for like one second. Yeah, now it's the top ones that are more visceral. Oh, man. Okay. Oh, my God. So funny. Oh, okay.

You got to get to eight. Or can you get nine and beat me? Ten? I got nine? You were nine and seven. By the time, you couldn't even face the nine long enough for me to get the other one. I guarantee I won't. Oh, shit.

I don't want to lose the challenge to you, but man. All right. I'm good for seven. Hey, I'm not i'm not gonna lie you have to click quicker you absolutely have to get the second channel there quicker because it's either top or bottom whichever one you do one's full force like punching it's the first one a whatever it is oh man bro all right level seven are you ready shit please please when i tell you to stop, please stop. Okay, you're mashing.

Okay. Hold on, I'm not even there. No, but one of them's on. Okay, okay, okay. Ow! Ow! Wait, that's only six. No!

Here we go, here. No, turn it. Here's seven. This is seven. Ow! What the fuck was that? That's my fault, I couldn't count. That's my fault. I couldn't count. That's my fault.

I was at six. Oh, man. You have to count it. What is ten? All right, bro. You got to seven, and then you went for all the glory. I'm not climbing the ladder. I've matched you so far. I hit seven and seven. went for all the glory i'm not i'm not climbing the ladder i've matched you so far i hit seven and seven just do your best button mash one side to the top immediately as

soon as i start screaming just switch to the other one button mash you're screaming at five so it's hard for me to tell because it's like ow ow ow ow ow ow it's builds up. Oh Sucks all right, okay. We'll just wait oh My god live if I put you on this right now our kid would come out like magneto he come out with powers, bro He'd be he'd be absolutely touched. Oh Man I Can't wait for I can't wait for you to like it am I going to all the glory here all the glory You're going all the glory here? All the glory? You're going all the glory.

Not, no, wait! No, Peyton! Ow! No, don't stop! Seriously! No! Stop! Ow!

Ow! Stop! Ow! Ow! Stop! Stop! I felt it in my foot! Stop!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Oh! That was slathering! Oh my god! I felt it in my ankle, bro! Now I know what you said. That was, that was, uh... It was eight. Eight and a half.

It was like, it was eight and eight. That's why I was trying to push so it could be even. I was trying to get you to nine. Oh my god, you don't click quick enough. Oh my god, how the... there's no, there is, there, no,

I was clicking it, but I was seeing how many clicks I was doing. That was like, one, two, three, four, five,

six, seven, eight. I started just, it's like little dots. There's no, there is no way, there's no way this is what a period feels like.

No, I can't. Bullshit. It's period. Bullshit. No, hell no. Give me an epidural then, for sure. Give me a whole other drug. Anyone, I can't. Bullshit. It's period. Bullshit. No, hell no. Give me an epidural for sure.

Give me a hobbit drug. Anyone that does natural birth, props to you. Oh, man. Okay. It is crazy how... No, don't you... Don't you dare. I'm not.

Yes, you are. You literally said you're going to. I'll rip them off. I will rip them off. Don't do it, bro. I will rip them off. It's on one, bro. No, it's on one until you mash it.

I'm not going to mash it. You're mashing it now. No, I'm not. Stop. P.O. No. it, bro. I will rip them off. It's on one, bro. No, it's on one until you mash it. I'm not going to mash it. You're mashing it now. No, I'm not. Stop. Pee out. No. Bro, stop. Oh, my God, bro.

It gets so bad, bro. Bro. Oh. Oh. Oh, my God. Oh. Oh, my God. You don't understand. I don't get it, bro. Okay, I'm not going to lie.

I get it. I put the left side up to 10. Bro, that on my last one, that was 10 on one side. That was intense. The You Should Know Podcast. All right, guys. We hope you absolutely loved that and enjoyed that. As Uncle P said, that is a sneak peek on what you get being a Koala Club member,

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