You Should Know Podcast - EATING EACH OTHERS BOOGERS! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: August 7, 2023

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Getting your kids to school safely is important to you. It's important to us too. Toyota, for what matters most. The You Should Know Podcast. hey everybody welcome back to you should know podcast episode 72 round of applause please we are back we are back in dallas te Texas, fresh off our trip to DreamCon. Before I say anything else, if you are new here or if you haven't already and you look below, you see that subscribe button, it's pressed. If you look even more below that and you see that comment section, it's filled with your name. Guess what?

Even more, I'm going to fill that out. Get your good karma. Let me say something. I'm here to address the damn comments all right read some comments right and i saw some people say am i the only one that just skips the intro and waits till i get into this stuff to those people let me say you are not a true true follower of this podcast because you know this intro is for a reason it's to get the announcements how you know things are coming up the same people that that are skipping this intro are the same people that comment,

asking questions about stuff we talk about in the intro, and that's why I don't answer them. So if you are watching this right now, and if you don't skip the intro, you are a legendary listener, you are a legendary watcher, and I love you. And this is why you get special information. Right now, I'm about to tell you something. Co-host Cam and I will be on TV, TBS today, Monday, August 7th at midnight. Round of applause, please. This is why you don't skip the intro. You know why? Because we are telling you we are going to make our TV debut. The game that we played at DreamCon, the Creator

League put on by House of Highlights is going to be on TBS today, Monday. So Monday going into Tuesday. If you want to watch the game, you want to watch us on TV, it's going to be so cool. We're going to be on TBS. Shout out to House of Highlights, shout out to DreamCon and shout out to TBS for having us. That is amazing. It's so

cool. Hopefully I'll skip the part where I airball the layout, but it's alright! It doesn't matter. Also, summer merch. We have put the bow on it. We are done making it. We are done doing everything with it. We are shipping all of the merch over to the studio right now.

We're going to do the final test of wearing it, seeing how it feels, making sure it's right to put out to y'all. So once we have that, it will be out to y'all. So in the next couple weeks you will have the merch and when i say this is premium stuff it is not just clothes it is fantastic things you can use in your everyday life we made sure that we are doing the gold standard of merchandise guys we got coast cam in the building we got mama live in the building. We got Mama Liv in the building.

It's going to be a fantastic episode. Now, to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. Today, we're here with the sponsor for your bouncing bundle of joy. No, we're not talking about a baby. We're talking about your baby makers. That's right. Today's show is brought to you by manscape but just like your babies your delicate little guys have sensitive skin

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Get 20% off and free shipping with the code YSK at manscaped.com. That's 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com and use code YSK. Use the platinum package because the gold standard is no longer good enough. The You Should Know Podcast. One more. And go. The You Should Know Podcast. One more. I can't see who we got co-host, Cam! Back in the studio! Yeah!

Time to... Oh. What happened? I was going to do Triple H's intro, but I forgot it. Time to play the game. It's time to play the game! It's time for the game! Has anybody said you resemble a meerkat?

Doesn't he? I do not resemble a meerkat. You do kind of look like... You look like a prairie dog. No, I don't. Yeah, you do. Like, a little bit. Ruby looks like a prairie dog. Like, if don't. Yeah, you do. Like a little bit. Ruby looks like a prairie dog.

Like if you told me in your off time you dig underground. Oh, I dig holes in the desert? In the wastelands? No. Get that shit out of here. I don't look like a prairie dog. You do. Like a cute prairie dog.

Somebody told me I looked like the ginger kid off of Everybody Hates Chris. Because you are a ginger. No, I'm not. Cam's in deep denial. We love you. I believe you. Cam's in deep denial. We love you. I believe you. What color is my head?

Dark orange. No, it's not. You're like right under Texas Longhorn. I am not brown. Yeah, you are. I am not hook'em. No, you're not. You're like a shade darker. No, it's called brown.

Yeah. I have a bad lisp today. You do. Because your tooth needs to be taken out. Yeah, so if you remember, if you've been here for a while, you know a couple months ago, my bad wisdom tooth, really swollen, really in pain, really sick. Tooth fairy came in and said, Just shot your shit up.

But it went away. Like I was told it would and it's going to come back. Now it's back. But now it's back but now it's starting to go away again i feel fine but it got so infected right my gums got so infected it was like a pouch right it was like it was like a little like a sack of pus no honestly like you stab if you went like this you could see like a sack of flesh back there and anytime i pressed on it arc of my tongue it would squirt outirt out what felt like a yellow juice because it was real sour. It was kind of like breast milk.

You ever tried breast milk before? You have not. No, you haven't. No, you haven't. You've not sucked on a lactating nipple. Damn. Sorry. This isn't Patreon. Yeah, sorry. Patreon, link below.

But you have not. You have not done that. No. No. Oh, you had a glass of it yeah no you didn't shut up yeah we went to we went i went and uh we went to a farm and you can milk cows right you can milk cows so a cow no but there's also a one there's also just a token female laying in a machine. Her breasts are just in the little cutouts. You just go... That's foul.

I don't know if that's making the cut. That's sick. Should it? That's sick. Is it bad? Is that cancelable? Not a lot. It was a joke.

It was a joke. Big joke. It was a joke. How are you doing? I'm good. I have a headache. You give me headaches. I have a headache. Big joke. It was a joke. How are you doing? I'm good. I have a headache. You give me headaches. I have a headache.

You give me headaches. No, you give me headaches. When am I ever giving you a headache? Every single episode. Literally every single Saturday over a year straight. You know what I don't like about you? What? I saw what you did behind my back.

What did I do behind your back? So, I have a sneeze. Yeah, I can tell. My S's are real. Your estrogen's real? No, my S's. It's like, I have to go like this. Yeah, it's because your a sneeze. Yeah, I can tell. My S's are real. Your estrogen's real? No, my S's. It's like, I have to go like, shh. Yeah, it's because your teeth suck.

Yeah, well. Ooh, sorry. Ooh! My name's Cam, and when I grew up, my family spent all the money in the world on dental doctor laces. I don't have laces. My mom's probably at the TV. Damn it, baby! She hates that line. I don't know why she hates that. I don't know. But you know what I don't have lace My mom's probably at the TV Damn it, Payton

She hates that line I don't know why she hates that I don't know But you know what I don't like? We went to DreamCon this week, right? Or last week Okay We went to an after party at DreamCon

Okay At the Hilton We did You left me for about 45 minutes You are so Cam, shut the hell up No, no, I promise you You're such a liar

Bro Max 20 minutes And you said 20 minutes. I was able to... And I didn't believe it at first, and then I checked the message, and it was about 20 minutes. I talked to seven big concert creators for 30 minutes. If you think it was 45 minutes, you're delusional.

I talked to Duke Dennis for about 15 minutes. No, you didn't! I didn't talk to him for 15 minutes? No, you didn't! How long did I talk to him for? No. How long? I wasn't there.

Exactly! But I was gone for 20 minutes total. So if you can say when i left duke arrived you talked the entire you were gone way before duke got there i talked to kalani before that exactly and i talked to tony before kalani exactly i'm not saying you didn't talk to all of them i'm saying you damn sure didn't talk to duke for 15 minutes because when i walked out i dapped up duke because he was at the bottom part that's when I first saw him because he just got there. I dapped him up, went to the restroom, got stopped.

That little interview made it. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm saying. I talk about all this because behind my back, all you have me waiting alone in an environment that I'm not comfortable with. I got stopped. With no alcohol in my body. Oh, you were sitting there tonguing six different Millers.

You were like, I think this one's it. Because I spent $300 to get Millers for the whole group i come back there's no group we need to talk to freaking that was ridiculous mark what's going on man what's going on mark wasn't much of a beer ten dollars a beer i could literally leave the hilton go to the 7-eleven get but dreamcon's a great event we're not amazing's amazing. And Mark didn't make those prices. Yeah, that was a Hilton. But my best friend's not with me. I'm alone. I'm anxious.

I called up yesterday. I go on Twitter, and I'm getting tagged in a video. I'm getting tagged in a video. And Cam got interviewed by another content creator. I don't know their name. Be More Nerdy. Be More Nerdy Galaxy. Galaxy Greg. Galaxy Greg. Galaxy Greg, Be More Nerdy. I don't know. Be more nerdy. Be more nerdy, Galaxy. Galaxy Greg.

Galaxy Greg. Galaxy Greg, be more nerdy. Baltimore. So I'm watching. We're going to invoice you $15,000. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. Shout out to you.

I was on Twitter, and I'm just going. I rarely get on Twitter anymore, but I check it. I'm getting tagged, right? And I was like, oh, Cam didn't interview. Oh, that's why he left me alone. He didn't say anything. Click on the interview. Not even seven seconds into the interview, Cam's why he left me alone and didn't say anything click on the interview not even seven seconds into the interview cam is shitting on me he says yeah payton's hard to work

with gives me headaches i have to take ibuprofen every day ibuprofen same shit different toilet and uh why don't you talk nicely about me to other people did you continue the interview yeah oh so you saw all the nice stuff in the mush because you to force that he was a letter it was a leading question no exactly the leading question always gets a response of humor you can really say I'm to the industry idiot thank you for welcoming me yeah industry I make fun of you and then on the back and I go no I'm

just kidding he's a genius he's amazing you didn't say that in a great friend you didn't say I didn't call you a cheat because you're not a genius but you can serve. You didn't say that in the interview. He's a great friend. You didn't say I was a genius. I didn't call you a genius because you're not a genius. I'm a genius in certain things. No. You're good. I'm not going genius. Of course you wouldn't.

You wouldn't say that. Because genius is like there's not... If you're a genius at something, what are you doing? Why are you chugging a Red Bull? You almost cut yourself because that turned sharp. Yeah, it did. Yes, it did. You're not going to tell me it's not sharp. This what i feel about our friend you're not a genius i feel like you're

the type of friend that if we're not in a room together and somebody were to come up to you right and you're having fun conversations with them like you had a warm-up conversation everything was good right y'all are comfortable with each other and then they bring up payton yeah they're like i don't know something about that payton guy i really like is he like he's. He's like an asshole sometimes, right? You'd be like, I don't want to say anything, but he fucking sucks. Now you're that kind of friend. Look, she's shaking her head no immediately. No.

As far as I'll go is when they ask, is he really that dumb? Is he that stupid? And I go, yeah. I go, believe it or not. I'm not that dumb. You're not that dumb, but you kind of fall in the same line as Liv. You speak a lot before you think. No, I think deeply.

And then I speak. That's concerning. There lies the issue. No, this is the thing. Everybody, all you bots, right? You're a bot. Most of y'all are bots. All you sheep being shepherded need to grow up and become a wolf.

Bah. Bah. I'm a big. This is the thing right a lot of and i'm speaking to the people that agree with the big headed big hip bad toe guy right here you should have said bastard it would have been a great alliteration there you go singing better than all of us huh i went to english class oh my name's cam i got three phds call me dr cam i don't have three phds yeah i know i have three degrees working on a fourth. And you dropped out and you didn't go to English class.

You never attended a comp too. I did wait. I got a comp too. I was really good at English. But, what was I saying? That's like one of his weird soft spots is fucking English class. He will never let that go. I'm really good at it. He always he always i was really good at writing essays

like that's some weird go to payton's polaroids captions are those not fire yeah it sounds like shakespeare and thank you shakespeare and like ai had a baby it's like the evanescence of the dark lonely nights and the lonesome it's like yeah i'm good at writing it's weird it's because i in writing i can get in my weird bag anyway. Damn. Sorry. What was I saying? I actually don't know something about You called me a big-headed big-toed big-hip bastard or you should have said bastard. Oh if you agree with me, you're a sheep That's what you're saying. Oh, yeah, like people like you and the people that agree with cam Y'all think in this weird-ass box, right?

Y'all think in this box of like this how life should be this is what we were taught growing up I'm just like I'm a free think box, right? Y'all think in this box of like, this is how life should be. This is what we were taught growing up. I'm just like, I'm a free thinker, right? I think, honestly Cam, I just had this thought the other day. When did- Fix your hat! Fix your fucking hat one more time!

Oh my God! Fix your hat one more time in a matter of five seconds. I dare you That just pissed me off you literally went Oh My god that should not have triggered me as bad as I'm sweating now. It's so cool in here, and I'm sweating you literally wait Yeah, so you sheep and I'm just a free thing. You fixed your hat so many times so quick. Let it rest. That's its sole purpose is to sit on your head.

Oh, my God. It's a new hat. Oh, my. It's not new. It's dingy as hell, but it's better than that. So put it back on because you're about to spill the drink. Oh, my God. What is that stance?

No, you need it on. I'm not going to lie. You need the hat on. It's not new. Don't ever say it's new. You've owned that for over a calendar year. It's been sitting in our office. That's the thing I was about to say.

I found it in the studio. But what I'm saying is my brain thinks of real things, right, that normal people wouldn't. Real things. Yes. Like, how did thinks of real things, right? That normal people wouldn't. Real things. Yes. Like, how did we meet certain things as humans? Like, did you ever think, how do humans meet kangaroos? Because I saw a kangaroo the other day.

And I was like, can you imagine the first time a human walked up to a kangaroo? And it's like, what are you? Oh yeah. No. First time, like way back, first kangaroo being it's like what are you oh yeah no first time like way back first kangaroo being seen that'd be crazy like how did that meeting happen they didn't set it up and jot it down in a ledger they just they found the kangaroo how what do you mean how like with somebody just swimming one

day if you were born in that motherfucker said he said he went yeah he's on a box for territory what dude no you got something going on there's like you'd have extra spitters that you really said it's not box for territory like i heard all that saliva in your mouth i'm sorry i probably put it in yours feel bad what swallow can i put it into your mouth no well. You wouldn't let me spit in your mouth? It's literally once an episode with him. He just said, you wouldn't let me spit in your mouth. Honestly. No.

So say you're in a working out, right? Yeah. Say my saliva held the best proteins and pre-outs and like protein and all the good stuff you know what you're saying no but all the mba mcaas and all those mba mcaa all the metabolics you need right you have no clue would you let me spit in your mouth no really no you could be but there is no other proteins available like you couldn't like to race in it so i all of protein on earth is gone yeah which means chicken it all meets no you can still eat chicken but the protein value of them i'm good the protein value

of those things like say the protein value is gone you have the food right you taste so the only way i can consume protein is by you spitting in my mouth one where do these diabolical thoughts come from two you never give me fair like i could see this one i could see that it's like you have to choose this sick answer that i'm giving you or you just lose it's when i look into your ocean blue eyes it's just kind of but you know what i mean like how did we meet like crickets you know what You know what I mean? It just happens. That's what I'm talking about. You just think life happens. I think about how it happens.

If you were born not in the United States, okay, then how'd they get here? What do you mean? Are there no free-roaming kangaroos in the States? No. Kangaroos don't have a home here? They're native to Australia. Wow. Do we have animals like here? They're native to Australia. Wow. Do we have animals like that?

Yeah. Like what? I don't know. Off the top of my head. Do other places have bears? Yes. Monkeys? Yes.

Lizards. Yes. There's a shit ton of stuff that we don't even have here. Like all. No, I know that. Like kangaroos. All sorts of stuff in the Amazon. I prime Amazon. Amazon Forest. Rainforest. like all no i know that all sorts of stuff in the amazon i i prime amazon

amazon forest rainforest no i'm saying like what do we have that's ours camels we have camels no we don't have oh you can just drive through yeah that's a zoo they get imported how on a plane boat boat boat you can put camels on boats legally. Yeah. How about birds? How do you get birds over here? Cage, boat. I was thinking a long leash. How would... It's literally...

That would be thousands of miles of like a shoelace. And you just go, you just have to go. Just feed him, just give him more slack. You give him extra slack when you go through the night, when you're about to fall asleep. So he's just flying. Yeah, he's like coasting. Dude, hey, ooh. That's kind of a creepy thought.

What's up? Okay, hear me out. I'd love to. We're importing birds. Through boat? Through boat. The big containers. Boat and cattle.

You do understand that's how life works, right? Like those huge shipping containers. You just laugh. Let's get the baseline out of the way. You understand that's a real thing, right? The enormous shipping containers. They get filled with all sorts of products. Put on these boats that

hold hundreds of them at once i thought those were like and it takes no and it takes like months to get across sure it takes like a month and a half maybe i honestly didn't know that okay so well that's how that works so let's assume they put birds in boxes yes they put birds in boxes in the boxes and more boxes bird box don't look okay so let's assume. Do you think... What do you think... Okay, this is what I'm trying to say. Fuck! Say it! This is what I'm trying to say.

Say a bird is on a boat, right? The cage gets broke, whatever. It gets free. But say it's in, like, the dead center of, like, the ocean. Yeah. Like, in between the two paths. Do you think that bird could survive and make it back to land? Birds have memory GPS.

Like, brain GPS. That's not what I'm asking. Oh. What? They have GPS, like, in brain GPS. That's not what I'm asking. What? They have GPS in their brain. I'm not talking about location. I'm saying, do you think he could fly long enough without stopping to make it back to land?

Do birds have lungs? If he's in the middle? Yes. Oh. What does that have? I'm talking about endurance. That's what I'm saying, lung endurance. No, it's not a lung endurance.

I don't know if they run off double A's. I don't fucking know. I'm saying, dude, a lot of people think birds are fake a lot of them are some they are cia birds bro in 2020 whenever the whole thing shebang was going on and everybody's inside i didn't see a goddamn bird not one so true i didn't see a bird inside cj said he saw way too many birds like this he said with their mouth open he said that's how you know you need to plug them up but i'm saying a bird get it breaks through its cage right yeah it's in the middle of the ocean like thousand miles from this thing a thousand miles in there i get that i'm saying

do you think a bird because obviously we know they can flap and it's their nature and they can just hold it and they'll soar for a little bit yeah it's a bird but do you think they could do that dead straight all the way back to land because essentially what i'm saying is like it's an athletic bird exactly if what if they they have to rest at one point, but they're above water? As soon as they rest, they get wet, they die. Not all birds, but I'm saying... There's like tree branches in the water. Not in the ocean.

Yeah. No. Big trees. Big underground trees. Big underground trees. They're three, four mile long in the middle of the ocean. Not even a joke, Cam. There's underground trees.

I understand that. In the middle of the ocean. Do you understand how big they'd have to be? Big trees. The biggest of trees ever, and they'd have to be under the water. Yeah. Well, they start under there, and then there's like a branch or two going up. I saw it in a Mr. Beast video.

Okay. Next lesson. At the bottom of the ocean. Right. We've never been. How dark? How cold? Never been.

Is that a quite good tree-growing environment? I have a conspiracy, and we haven't done our conspiracy episode yet. Yeah. I don't think aliens are in space. You think they're here with us? I think they're under the water. Because we don't know what's under that. Ice wall.

What? Ice wall. Like an igloo? What's that mean? The ice wall. We can't go into it. We've got to save it for Patreon. We've got to save it for Patreon.

But how was... So your week was good. We can't go into it. We gotta save it for Patreon. We gotta save it for Patreon. But, uh, but, how was, but, so your week was good. Everything was good with your week. Holy hell, we're getting back to that. Yeah. Yeah, it was good. Don't care. So I, um, I had another panic attack at the department store. I just don't like getting random questions.

Don't question me if we're not in the middle of a conversation. Oh, yeah. Don't start our conversation with a fierce question. Very direct too. Especially if I wasn't looking at you. Yeah, I gotta see you. So I went shopping right? I got new clothes. Ribbit. Thanks! So I got new clothes

right? Hey, matter of fact I'm not gonna tell you to pause it. My testicles are warm. Let's take two seconds to applaud Uncle P for not wearing black and he got a new shirt. All right. You can't count either. What?

I said two seconds. Oh, I didn't say it. Well, depends on what kind of clock watch you use. Isn't that crazy that time is different for every watch? It's not. Because not all watches are set the same, so no one knows. No, they're not. No, they're not.

No, it's not. Time is not subjective. Time is not subjective. Tim, yes, that No, it's not. Time is not subjective. Time is not subjective. Tim, yes, that's the most subjective thing. Time is not subjective. One second. Time on my watch is different from the time on her watch. I guarantee.

That's not even what I'm talking about. The time in my lunchroom in high school is different than the time in my classroom because we would always get let out early. That is things, reading time, people programmed. I'm saying time moves the same no matter where you are. What's the glorious clock that we all go off of? Show me that one. Show me the world clock that we go off of.

Show me. There is a world clock. Show me. There is a world clock. Look up world clock. Oh, so something that was programmed by man. So that's going to be different than something else. That's not my argument.

I'm saying one second is one second, whether you're in space, underwater, on a boat. No, it's not. No, it's not. No, it's not. No, it's not. Cam, no, it's not. Cam, ready? Everybody close your goddamn eyes. Everybody in the studio right now. Ready? Because no you do my example one second one second is one second okay close your eyes that's what i'm saying do my exercise you counting to one do my exercise me counting to one do my exercise that is not cool oh my god tight all right ready i want everybody to count to six ready in your heads out loud Do my exercise. That is not cool. Oh my god. Okay, go. Close your eyes tight. Alright, ready? I want everybody to count to six. Ready? In your heads, out loud.

Okay, do the open your eyes. Ready? Now, on your own time. Your exercise is stupid as hell for counting out loud. Of course it is. You're supposed to say, count to five and open your eyes when you get to five.

No, no, clap whenever you get to five. Clap when you get to five. Ready? Everybody in your head. Ready, set, go. Yeah! One second! One second! One second! Different! Different! Different!

Different! Different! Different! Because it's not the same. I'm saying the way you're counting is not the... If we... Okay, people mess up. People make mistakes. If there was no such thing. That's like saying, if I gave you a math problem right the answer is the same

I'm gonna bite your eyeballs out the wrong answer that is because of you math is math if I say What is seven times three and for whatever reason you think it's 21 that doesn't change that it's 21 Kim But one way one that's a math 60 seconds is what one minute, okay? That doesn't change that it's 21. Damn. One second is one second. That's math. 60 seconds is what? One minute. Okay. But how do you get to 60 seconds?

That will never change. How do you get to 60 seconds? If you count slower and she counts faster, that doesn't change that a minute is 60 seconds. If I give you a question, a math problem. But how do you get to 60 seconds is the question. One second. All the way to 60. Exactly.

Your one second is different than her one second, is different than mine one second. No, no, the way we count it, Don't touch me. Our perception, one second is the exact same for everyone ever. No it's not, no it's not. Don't say that shit again. Yes it is.

How? How not? One. What is two plus two? Four, every time. Okay, so does it matter if in your head you do three plus one? No. Four times two divided by two?

No. It doesn't matter how you get there because it's always four. So one minute is always 60 seconds. That's fine. I get that. But the length of the 60 seconds is what I'm talking about. Exactly. Exactly.

It's never different. It's never different. How? We just did an exercise. Bro, because that is not the point. You are getting stuck on the fact that if you do something different, the way that she does it, it doesn't change the fact. It doesn't change the truth.

Everybody's different, though. Machines are different. It doesn't change the truth. There's fast stopwatches that are faster than other clock stopwatches. What? There's stopwatches that you can buy change the truth. There's fast stopwatches that are faster than other clock stopwatches. What? There's stopwatches that you can buy from the store. But if you click start, they are ticking at the same rate. Period.

No, they're not. No, it's not. I am so confident I won that. I am fucking confident. You're an idiot. Thank you, Liv. Okay. No, we're done. That's too long. It's too long. I am struggling to articulate that. I'm fucking confident. You're an idiot. Thank you, Liv. Okay. No, we're done.

That's too long. It's too long. I am struggling to articulate this. Because you're wrong. It's hard to articulate a wrong point. You're so dumb. Then you say personal insults. If I were to say you have to pay for your eyesight,

your toe is that of a pirate, and your hip works on only Wednesdays. That would hurt your feelings, so you don't have to come from my democracy. My hands smell horrible. Hey, that was Liv the other morning. I woke up. I literally just, her hand was like on my chest.

I gave it a kiss and I went, what the fuck was that? I was like, oh my God. And then I look at the sheets. She's soaking wet in a puddle of sweat. All of her clothes are off on the ground. I'm like, Jesus Christ. I woke up like that the other day too. No, okay, give me some. She said, because I was hot.

What are some good reasons that your hands would smell? Blue collar job. Babies. What? Like, if you're always having to deal with a child. Do children naturally stink? Yes, they stink. They're sticky.

I've never met one. What? Babies. They smell so good. Well, yeah, their skin smells good when they're fresh out of a bath. I've never smelled a baby. If you have a kid, do it himself. 15 minutes, you come back, there's damn paint on your wall boogers in his ass there's all

sorts of like there's all he's literally it's a kid like there what do you mean you know how sick your agenda for the day has to be if there's a booger yeah ask kid. What's the strangest thing you found in your butt? Yes. Like, whenever I had a girlfriend, there would always be her hair in my butt, dude. I can't even. I can't even. I can't even. What is this?

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Check it out. That's funny. But I have a real thought about myself. You literally just told me that time is different for people. It is. That pissed me off. It's true. It's nuts. I have a real thought about myself. You literally just told me that time is different for people. It is. That pissed me off. It's true. It's nuts.

I have a real thought, a genuine thought, Cam. Let's hear it. I genuinely think if I needed to, I could pick up an 18-wheeler. I mean it Bro If they had a gun to your head Right And they said You can use other things

You're not picking up I don't mean like Bench press it But like I can at least get the back wheels up. No shot. If I needed to. No shot. Because sometimes when I'm scared, I run real fast.

I won. Oh, the fastest I've ever ran was when I was being chased by a dog. But this is an 18-wheeler. Like if I saw my mom under an 18-wheeler tire. She's dead. 100%. I love you, Mama Harden. You're dead you look at your son's frame and you think

you think he's just casually gonna lift no you get super human strength okay i'm pretty sure my mom told me she picked up a car car is different i can see you picking up your mom strong i can see i can see a car an 18 18-wheeler. Yeah. You would struggle moving one of those wheels. Oh, come on. Cam, if I – So you don't remember back in basketball workouts, those big-ass wheels that we would flip? I wasn't scared.

I wasn't scared. I'm saying that's heavy enough. We had to do a hold. There was – they put you in teams of six to hold that bitch above your head. Yeah, but we were all – That is one tire. But I'm saying if I'm scared or if I'm trying to save somebody I love Like if it's okay say say I had a kid right mm-hmm

I could in my kid guy under 18 wheeler tire, and I need to pick it up There's nothing on earth that's stopping me from picking up that 18 where you can try all you want dead cam. I'm strong How much does a 18 wheeler let's just get some quick how much there's nothing in your there's there is nothing you can do okay how much is it i want you to guess okay so 100 pounds truly no a real guess that's all i don't know i'm bad with guessing like everybody asks me their height i say five 5'3". So, okay, so let's do this. Okay. Is it empty? Empty.

Okay, guess how much it weighs. Realistic guess. Think about... 500 pounds. Okay, I'm going to tell you, a regular car is anywhere from like 2,000 to 5,000 pounds. No way. Not my Tesla. The Model Y Tesla weighs 4,416 pounds. No, it doesn't.

Okay. That might be in kilometers. No. That would't. Okay. That might just be in kilometers. No. That would be kilograms, and it's still the same. Whatever, dog. But, no, I'm saying, like, you don't think. So, just, okay, now that you have that, your Model Y weighs 4,400 pounds. Yeah.

So, now, give me a realistic guess for an 18-wheeler. 45,000 pounds. Okay. How much does an elephant weigh? A semi-truck. I could push an elephant over semi truck with an empty trailer weighs around 35 000 pounds an 18 wheeler that is loaded can weigh as much can weigh up to as much as 40 okay enough with the phone or 80 000 enough with

the phone great i'm saying there's no shot in hell listen i'm not saying i'm picking it up and i'm flipping i'm doing tricks with it you can't even get the tire yes i can i can get the wheel up at least no you can yes i can can you push an elephant over tricks with it. You can't even get the tires to move. Yes, I can. I can get the wheel up at least. No, you can't. Yes, I can. Can you push an elephant over? No. Oh, I could. You can't either.

Yes, I can. No, you can't. Have you ever met an elephant? No. I have. No, you haven't. Can you push a giraffe over? Probably.

Same pounds. You literally just teep kick. It's right in the front of the knee. It's going to go, and fall. That was kind of sad. It was. That made my heart hurt.

Yeah. But I... Who was that? We always have little visitors here. Okay here okay also you're not moving that yes i am physically can't no you can't dude you just underestimate me because you don't respect me and you need to watch your mouth the only i love saying that the only time these adrenaline superhero shit stories happen it was like a boulder it was like a guy was climbing and hiking in a boulder. Maybe 1,000 pounds.

And he had enough force to push it to where it then, guess what? It's a boulder. So then he pushed it a little bit and it rolled off. This is a big-ass 40,000-pound truck. Pick it up a little bit and roll out. My mom can roll. What's rolling out? My mom.

So you think you can pick it up enough to where a human can slide on it? Dude, your hands. I don't know. I'm not saying how my hand health would be afterwards. You can't do it. How fast do you think you can climb Mount Everest? Honestly. I don't think I can even do it.

You are probably the weakest individual I know. You're talking about sheep shit. It takes a real wolf and a shepherd to understand its limit. Yeah, that was cringe. But guess what? You saying you can climb Everest. I could. No, you can't.

Oh, my God. I'm good at rock climbing. You trip. I had the fastest high score at main event on the rock climbing when I was eight. They don't even have rock climbing at main event. Because you grew up poor. You, that's why your tag is cinched now because you just sat on it. Yep.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, buddy. All right. You cannot climb Mount Everest. If I wanted to. You cannot lift an 18-wheel. Yes, I could. No, you cannot.

18-wheel would be harder, but Mount Everest, I could. Peyton, you can't even compete in a basketball game without being winded. And you think you can climb 29,000 feet? With a rope? You need a lot more than a rope, doofus. And a backpack. You need a whole campsite. You need oxygen.

What's in the backpack, dumbass? Oh, your singular backpack. Big backpack. No, you're not climbing Everest. What do you think I could do? Not that. What's in the backpack, dumbass? Oh, your singular backpack. Big backpack. Big backpack. No, you're not climbing Everest. What do you think I could do? Not that. Give me something that's hard.

Give me something that's conventionally hard that you think I could accomplish. I think you could do... I think right now you could run a sub-nine mile. You're so disrespectful. I could beat your ass at something. No, you cannot. You think you can run a faster mile than me right now? No, I'm just saying physically I could beat you.

Oh, no. Well, not that either. No, you can't. Cam, whenever you get in altercations, you want to go by rules, left jab, right jab, hook. I'm grabbing your manhood. Yeah, you're saying you're going to grab my manhood and rip it off of my body. I'll bite that shit off if I need to. Good win.

Yeah. How about you stick to being a man? I am. And you're no longer. Okay. I'll give you one. I think you. You're not doing that.

You definitely can't do that. You want to know something, Cam? I'm too weak for that. Give me something I could do. I don't know, bro. That's all right. You suck. You're not a good friend. I don't know, bro. That's alright. You suck. You're not a good friend.

You don't believe in me. I mean, maybe 100 pull-ups. Maybe. Oh, I don't know about that. Okay, then I don't know. But... I damn sure can't do 100 pull-ups. You know what?

How much our respect level is different from each other, Cam? What? How much I respect you... You think I can go to the moon if I wanted to? No. No. There's no helmet to fit you. And no one's ever been to the moon.

Anyway. For your birthday, I had a very big trick planned for you. And I was going to do it on the podcast. A trick? Yeah, but. Upcoming birthday or previous? Previous. But for respect, I didn't do it.

Good. And I didn't get advice counsel from the team to say not to do it. I just didn't do it. Do you want to know what it was? I do want to know what it was i do want to know what it was i was going to this is true okay because i was at your house like a day or two before your birthday okay i was going to get you a box a birthday box right with a ribbon and you pull the top off birthday box inside is the present the present inside was going to be rub's shit. And I was going to hand it to you on the podcast and you opened

the box. It was just your daughter's shit. That would have been amazing. That would have been hilarious. But I thought in the future you could have been like, oh, I want to sue Payne. It's an unsafe work environment bro you you have you have nightmares

of that so he's suing you no i don't yes you do but i would never have ever sue you yeah ever no i would never sue you either good but if you ever but like shake on say i wanted to sue you the only thing that would stop the lawsuit is if you kiss me on the mouth i'd kiss you i'm gonna sue you it's clockwork it's easy it's easy it's easy oh i didn't tell you about my department store breakdown oh my god you are all over the place i want to be all over you oh so that my department store breakdown right you this is the thing with you you act like you don't like that i flirt with you if i were to do it so much if i were to stop you would miss it no can't it'd be no life would be normal again i always flirted with you i always had no but this is it the

department store right so i went to the department store and i had i just went shopping i bought all these clothes i had a lot of bags right right? A direct question. Came your way. I had four bags, and I was walking through the Macy's, because that's where I parked on the other side is the Macy's. Beverly Hills Macy's, where I met Bria. So, I started thinking of the other lyric. I couldn't think of it. So, anyway, I was walking down the aisle, and you know it's all the perfume and cologne people, and they are manhandling people.

It's always like a damn grenade goes off when you watch it. Oh, my God. It's an instant headache. They're so aggressive. Yes. Normally, they give out the paper, and they're like, you want to try something? Yeah, exactly. And that's what I'm expecting.

I'm used to that. That wouldn't throw me off my game. Okay. But I had a lot of bags in my hand. I was walking, looking dead straight, right? All of a sudden, from the booth I was walking past, she goes, one more bag? Fantastic question. Add one more bag? Fantastic question. Add one more bag to that.

It threw me off my game. But it made me panic. And when I panic, I lie or I yell. And so I yelled at this woman. I literally go, no! Like that. And everybody in the store turned. And I hit a light jog out of the Macy's.

Like with my bags bags it was like this it was it was a troubling experience no yeah you stink big guy what what you're sniffing your armpits you stink all right we took a break and you're gonna you're gonna break secret? Yeah, ribbit. Honestly, if I give you $5,000 right now. Yep. Okay. I don't actually know. Nope, ask first.

I was going to bend in front of you. Bend in front of me? That's it? Yes, do it right now. Sniff. Fight. Do you honestly get upset when I show you my butt cheeks when we FaceTime? What are you doing?

We talked about, oh, that's Patreon we talked about. Got the world doesn't know. Sorry, Koala Club. But I do have, since I'm giving up hypotheticals right now... Oh, my God. I have some would-you-rathers for you. I think this whole thing

about we're going to do would-you-rathers. Okay. Because I think we're very good at that and you have an idiot mindset. I have the idiot mindset. Yeah, the way you think of life... I can lift 40,000 pounds and my mom's under there. Sorry you don't care about your loved ones. R. the idiot mindset. Yeah, the way you think of life. I can lift 40,000 pounds.

My mom's under there. Sorry you don't care about your loved ones. R.I.P. Tombstone. No. Pick it out. No. What color coffin?

That's so dark. That's very dark. I'm sorry. Knock on wood. We had a great time with my family this weekend. We did. Love them always. Oh, yeah. My mom was like, I didn't talk about how y'all came over.

And I was like, Mom, we recorded that before we went but yeah shout out to the harden family for housing that was your address but i like i did the code boys the fact that you didn't think about saying that is insane it is but yeah all right honestly cam i'm really curious what you have to say about this i'm so scared i'm so scared and i want you to be dead ass serious right use your use your brain when you answer this i'm so scared would you rather lose your sight or your memory uh i'm gonna go with i'm going memory of course you picked the stupid shit how is that stupid of course i wouldn't want to lose my memory but for you to live every yeah like i essentially have alzheimer's at that point but i can imagine imagine imagine you look at me like who are you you would be sad you don't get to see me that's true i wouldn't be that sad but it's but with the memory

uh but like sight cam i don't know i might i'd be fully functional without my sight no you wouldn't 100 no you wouldn't without your sight You have You have You have no idea You could I could tell you to walk to your desk Completely closing your eyes right now You're tripping Cam no I'm not I have great navigational sensory skill

Alright Garmin You have great navigational sensory skill Cam I move like an orangutan Drive home Blind Drive home What? Drive home I could Get back home. What? Drive home.

Get back to your house. I could definitely walk to my house blind. Closing my eyes. If I were to close my eyes right now, I could definitely walk home. You think you could close your eyes and get home blind? Cam, my house is like four miles away. Cam, I go here every day. I don't even know if you could

get home blind or seeing. I don't even know if you could get home right now walking. Cam don't even know if you could get home right now walking. Cam, I can tell you how to get there right now. You can tell me how to get there. You can't do it. You walk out the door. Bro, you cannot get home blind barefoot. Okay, give me a, look, I'm going to close my eyes for the rest

of the damn episode. Tell me what to do. Okay. I know you're right there. I know the camera's here. Nope. Yep. Told you. Where am I? Here. Okay, he can hear you. Okay, just because you're right there. I know the cameras here. Nope Yep, told you Here okay. He can hear you. That's what okay? Just cuz I can't see doesn't mean I can't hear Peyton if you were blind I go look if you were bull are you bat if you were blind walking down the street? Yes, okay? And you're like oh, I'm so good. I studied. I know exactly to go all I have to do is go hey Peyton I yell you turn your head once you're off balance you have no clue yes i

am no clue where you are now cam look give me something to do throw me something okay lightly point towards look there's a can no no no point towards point towards our cooler right there it's exactly where it's at I knew you were coming. Because you can hear me. Exactly. I'm not losing my hearing. You're losing your sight. Exactly, but I heard you coming.

I'm good with threats. Bro, if you're walking in a straight line, I yell your name. You go, oh, who's that? I know who it is. It's Cam. But you're not going to get back on that straight line. Who's Cam? Oh, yeah.

What? Is it illegal to not walk in a straight line now? Can you hear corners? Like, you just know when to turn? Do my hands work. What? I have a seven-foot wingspan. No, you don't.

And... Of course I don't. You don't. And you're not making it home blind. You are ludicrous. Throw me this. Oh, my God. It will dry up. It's hiding here. You are ludicrous. Throw me this. Oh my god.

It will dry up. It's hot in here. Okay, Cam. Okay, but don't do it to hurt me. Don't do it to hurt me. You understand? Yeah. Okay. Throw it like up. Like give me some arch. But like make it a good throw. Okay. Alright. One, two, three. You threw it at my f***ing hand. Threw it right at his hand.

We'll go one more time. All right. Okay. Ready? Yeah. One, two, three. Who are you throwing at? I would think you're the...

Those are pretty clean throws, right? I'll give you another one. No, it's wet. Okay, give me something dry. Give me the blow up. Give me the blow up. No, take that. Okay.

UsainHouseShop.com. UsainHouseStudios.com. Black Shop. Ready? Yes. You're going to catch it? Yes. No, take that. Okay. Youshannowshop.com Youshannowshop.com Black Shop. Ready? Yes. You're going to catch it? Yes. One, two, three. You threw it right here.

My hands aren't here. Would you not be helpful if I was blind? Okay. Yeah, I would be helpful. I wouldn't let you walk home, dumbass. But I could.

Do you think I could write a paper if I was blind? Peyton, I don't think you could make it to your desk if you were blind. Switch seats with me, and I could do it blind. Get up and switch seats with me. Don't touch me. Where are you going?

Where are you going? Oops! And why is your mic wet? My mic's not wet. It's so wet. But guess what? I made it blind, and I can make it back. Okay, go. No, you sick freak. I'm blind. I'm vulnerable. I can't. No, you sick freak.

You sick freak. Bro, that's a lose-lose situation. Because I don't want to lose my memory. But if I'm going to live the rest of my life, I mean, I don't know, bro. I might go blind too, but I'm not delirious like you. I'm not going to go, oh, I can still walk home. You're the type of person, you scrape your knee, you're done for the day.

You take my eyes out, I'm walking. No, you're not. Cam, who's the closest loved one to you right now who lives the closest out of your loved ones to you right now the answer's me okay family no no the answer's me you no yes no there's a girl i talked to oh loved one more than me interesting no you down the road, down the road. Yeah, down the road. 45 minutes. By car. By car. Three days by feet. I could do it. Just give me water. No, I wouldn't let you.

That's what I'm saying. If there was no traffic. Oh, so if Earth stopped and you could walk in a straight line, you'd still mess up. Do I get a stick? You would still mess up. Do I get a stick? Yeah, you can get a stick, cane, anything. Good.

Do I get a dog? Who do you think you are? No, you don't get a dog. No. Why not? Why do you need one? I thought you were so all healing, all cane, anything. Good. Do I get a dog? Who do you think you are? No, you don't get a dog. Why not? Why do you need one? I thought you were so all healing, all perfect, man. Okay, I got another would you rather for you. Okay. Alright.

Would you rather find a rat in your kitchen or a roach in your bed? Rat in kitchen. No thought. Because you're dirty, dog. You let your dog lick off your forks and your spoons. You would rather find a roach in your bed. I would light my entire room on fire. Cam, roaches aren't that bad.

They just click clack and they leave you alone. Turn on the light. They're gone. You can nuke them, bitches, and they stay alive. Talking about it's not that bad. What roaches you met? If I see a rat in my kitchen, dunzo.

You'd kill a rat with your hands? You're a primal, dog. And you would just go to bed after a roach is in... Watch this, watch this. I'm sleeping, right?

I hear... Oh, oh, oh, oh! Bro, you never struggled. I hear... Oh, oh, because you had roaches in a pissy mattress. All right, Rick Ross.

Oh, oh, because you grew up with roaches. Listen, I'm sleeping, right? I hear... I know. I was like, oh, roachies here. And I look and I see a roach. Guess what? You're gone.

Roach gone. See you tomorrow. We'll figure that problem out tomorrow. If I see a rat, guess what? I take bronze wool. I take rat traps. I take rat traps. I take mouse boards, and I take peppermint oil. I prep the kitchen, and he's done.

What rat training did you go through where you know the ingredients to get rid of a rat? That's how you get rid of them. Peyton. You know, of course you would choose Roach. Why? Because your bed already sucks. I have a great mattress. No, you don't.

Yes, I do. Oh, my gosh. He's in love with this mattress, and it sucks. It's like a taco shell. That shit is broken, and it goes in the middle. Yeah, it's where I sleep. Because you have no choice. If you pick left or right, you end in the middle.

You have to sleep there. All right, next time you stay in my house, don't sleep in my mattress then. I won't. Last time I stayed in your house, I slept on the couch. Just because I have bad infrastructure on my mattress, there's nothing else wrong with my bed. That means that roach would fall right in the middle with you. Little, he'd be all up on your skin.

Cam. If I see a rat in my kitchen, I kill the rat. I found ants in my bed one time, four of them, and I just slept there. I was already bit. They don't bite twice. They don't bite, you ants whisperer. They don't bite twice. Cam, there's nothing wrong.

It's just like a... It's like a small dog with hard shell. A small dog with hard shell, creepy little legs, bulletproof back. You can chop his head off and he can move for three weeks. Yeah.

And it's a dog. Yeah. Rats are disgusting. What else is wrong with my bed? Dude, everything. That excessive amount of space from bed frame to wall. That shit's terrifying. I know exactly why you're saying that.

I bet there is a roach in your bed right now. I know exactly why you're saying that. Why? Because whenever we were in college, you ripped the sheets off me one time and there's crumbs. That's it. I was a boy. Yeah, you're dingy as hell. So?

Your bed sucks. Cam, think about this. If there's a rat in my kitchen i can't eat in there anymore if there's a roach in my bed i'm moving i am moving all you do is don't squish it on the sheets flick it off then take care of it grab a napkin you're not dirty dog you just have bad infrastructure with the vents and stuff so why does a rat make you dirty that's the same exact scenario rats live in sewers guess what goes in sewers poo it is a roach do you fart in your kitchen yes exactly what is that you're dirty dog you don't respect the sanctity of a kitchen i'm dirty i'm dirty yes i'm dirty. Yes, you fart you have 12 used towels hanging at once. Yes

Do you have seven pairs sneakers laid out just sprawled out in your kitchen? Yes, I don't have a do your feet stink Yes, you don't have a kitchen. There's another one. Do you own one fork? And it was crusted over with oatmeal in your sink. Yes Do you have three separate trash cans for a single man in a 600 square foot apartment? Yes. How does one have that much trash? No clue. Let's keep going.

When we got back from LA in February, yes or no, did that suitcase remain untouched for three months? Yes. And I'm dirty. Is your shower lining falling off ring by ring every shower you take? Yes. The last time I bathed, were ring every shower you take. Yes. The last time I bathed, were you out of body wash? Yes.

You clean yourself with water. You don't have shampoo. You are dirty. Yes. Do you keep an empty Febreze can to give the facade that you are clean and you make it smell good, but there's no Febreze in it? You've had the same can since December. Yes. I'm dirty.

You want me to unload my gun? You want me to? Go. Okay, let's see. One for one, go. I just gave you eight. Yes or no, do you let your dog lick your silverware? No. No, you can't do this if you lie.

All right, go, ask again. Yes or no, do you let your dog lick your silverware? When I'm done with the food. She licks it, then I put it in the thing. Then it goes to a dishwasher. Yes or no, do you use your dishwasher? No!'t have dishes i use paper go go yes or no does your dog lick its bum what yes or no does your dog lick its bum no your dog doesn't lick its own anus she can't damn she licks her her hoo-ha but she doesn't lick her bum okay so she licks her privates yeah yes or no does

that tongue go in your fork? Yes or no, does the fork go through a dishwasher? Yes or no, still gross. Yes. Oh, my God. What? Yes or no, do you eat at my house and use the same somewhere? Checkmate, bitch!

Yes or no, that's the only option because I don't have food in my house, so I have to eat dinner or I'm hungry for the rest of the day. Exactly. Yes or no, that's the only option because I don't have food in my house, so I'll have to eat 10 or I'm hungry for the rest of the day. Exactly. Yes or no, did you leave a cookie dip in your fridge from opening NFL Sunday to the Super Bowl? Yes or no, was a cookie dip molded in your fridge in a Pyrex bowl for four and a half months? I'm waiting. I'm waiting.

No, no, no. Yes or no, do you wash... No answer! Yes. Okay. Yes or no, do you wash... No answer. Yes. Okay. Yes or no, do you wash your hands every time after you poop? Cam? You son of a bitch.

Yes or no, do you cook for your family? Oh, I wash my hands every time. I wash my hands every time. Every time. Every time. Every time. We can't do this if you lie. Before I my hands every time. I wash my hands every time. Every time. Every time. Every time. We can't do this if you lie. Before I cook, every time.

If it's a quick sit down poop, no. Sometimes I go, it's sick. It's sick. I know. I know. It's sick. It's sick. Only in my own house.

Only in my own house. Now, that's a fact. That's a fact. If I poop anywhere, it's still gross. So, yes or no, do you have respect for the sanctity and the cleanliness of your kitchen based off what I just asked? No! You're kidding.

Based off what? So you would be fine housing a rat in your kitchen. You might as well. You might as well get a rat named Jeffrey and have it live in the pantry because that's the kind of man you are. Oh my god. Oh my god. You just like seized There was like foam Are you okay? She said you've had a rat in your kitchen before as an Arkansas. It's a different story

Yes or no oh you don't want me to keep going okay yes or no okay i can't say it okay go yes or no did you like in your house actually the answer is no the answer is no she never stepped foot in the house did i take her to kroger yes. She never stepped foot in the house. Did I take her to Kroger? Yes. Did she ever step foot in my house? No. She never stepped foot in my house.

Yes or no? She never stepped foot in my house. Did you let them use Tupperware? No. No. Did we? No, we didn't give them Tupperware. They were in my car multiple times.

No teeth and all. So you're dirty And you don't respect the safety of your kitchen Bottom line Peyton, you don't even eat real food I'm here Not for long God willing Yes or no, do you eat fast food ten times or more a week?

Yes So? So what are we talking about? You're dirty. Of course you don't have a problem with a rat being in your kitchen. That's not oscillating and that's so selfish. I was wondering why I'm starting to sweat. I didn't click that.

I eat my boogers. Oh god. Libby. Don't say that. And you tongue kiss her. No you don't. Oh now I got your wife on. Because you want to do this.

Y'all both share the same kitchen. Y'all don't respect the sanctity and cleanliness of your kitchen. We don't. Yes or no. Yes or no, Liv. Yes or no. Do you pick your nose and eat the boogies? Hell no.

Yes. You do not. She does not eat boogers. No, you're lying. Yes, I do. I do eat my boogers. Because I just don't. I don't like going in the tissue. But it's only the ones that are like the thick ones. Yes, I do. I do eat my boogers because I just don't like going in the tissue.

But it's only the ones that are like the thick ones. Oh, my God. Olivia, you do not eat boogers. Oh, my God. Yes, I do. Why would I lie about that? Why are you so confident right now? Because it doesn't matter.

It could be a lot worse. It could be a lot worse. I could be eating other things, but it's my boogers. What else could you be eating? They come out of me. Oh, my God. So does shit. I don't eat my shit.

Just my boogers. You don't eat boogers. I don't know why you're saying that. You kiss your wife. Baby, yes, I do. I have been. Your dad has even saw me do it. Oh, my God.

No, he has not. Yes, he has. This is not real. Tell him he's on the podcast this is not up to the mic it is i don't know why it's such a big deal and i don't care all y'all people out there y'all probably eat y'all's boogers too and i bet so many people in the comments like she doesn't eat boogers oh my god yes i do i'm sweating my ass off it's so funny get away from me he's not answering okay no i don't you're lying through your teeth i will i eat mine i don't i don't think about lying through teeth we got shitty fingers we got shitty fingers lying through teeth we got shitty fingers we got booger fingers and y'all

are just making concoctions in the kitchen yeah not in the kitchen oh you just eat them and walk into the kitchen i wash my hands after I eat my boogers. Oh, you goddamn lie. I do. Every time, Liv. He's calling. I do. All right.

Put him on the mic. Dad, can you hear me? You are on the podcast right now. Can you hear me? Liv said that she eats her boogers and that you've seen her do it. Is that true or false? What the fuck? Yeah.

Dirty. It's a nasty family you gotirty! It's a nasty family you got there. It's a nasty household. Thanks, Mike. He's sweating. Because I've never... What?

No... I've done it literally right next to you. I told you that. He said I'm a nasty wife. I told you that. I love you. I love you too. Oh my God I love you, too.

Oh, my God. All right, bye. He said, for real, I did see you do that. What is happening right now? And he called me out. All right, love you, bye. Oh, my God. It's a gross household we got here.

Why are you, like, are you going to divorce me now? Because I eat my fingers. So now, I sit here and kiss you all the time. You're not. Bro, you caress her face with your shitty finger booty hands. Yeah, that's gross. I didn't know that. So there's a lot of shit that's coming out the bag.

You don't wash your hands after you shit, which is a lot more gross than me eating my boogers. I already said that is very rare occurrence. If I'm rushing to go do something that's enjoyable, whatever, that's disgusting. It's only in my own house. Honestly, though. And I barely ever do it. You just said you eat boogers. Not that often.

I told you. Only when it's certain ones. Oh, my God. She has, like, a consistency like Pat Pallet. Why are you looking at me like that? Dude, I'm done. So, no wonder you were fine with rats in your kitchen. I'm done.

Okay, I guess. I guess I won that one. I guess we're done. I won another one since we got to live here. Would you rather have glass in your finger every time you swipe through your phone? So every time you scroll through your phone you get glass in your finger, right? Would you rather bite your tongue every time you eat? By my tongue

Hell no, do you know how was awesome you bitch? I do it quite a bit We use this non-non-bad wife No, like I actually cuz one thing when you buy your tongue i do it quite a bit well you just gnaw on a bad wife no like i actually because one thing when you bite your tongue it continues to happen like once you like bite it or bite the side of your tongue it continues to happen it happens to me a lot actually so what i'm taking that one over glass my finger don't eat boogers bro but no he actually said that that means it's real yeah no you're biting your tongue. Yes! Do you enjoy it? I don't mean to do it.

I really don't mean to do it. It's like when I'm eating, like I accidentally bite my tongue, and then once you do it, it continues to happen. I don't think so. Oh my God. I don't think that's a natural. That's not a law of science. Because when I eat, I move my tongue. If I bite my tongue, I'm not eating food for about four hours.

Yeah, no, like my mouth's out of commission for about a calendar week. No, I bite my tongue when I not eating food for about four hours yeah no like my mouse out of commission yeah about a calendar week no I bite my tongue when I'm eating like this side yes so you're sitting there gnawing on it like a cow I don't mean to do it I'm not gonna lie it's not on purpose see I'm gonna I'm gonna make myself seem bad right now okay I kind of enjoy getting glass or like like like thorns in my fingers why okay I'm with you on that as far as like wood chips or like yeah what are they called splinters splinters i don't mind the splinter me neither i don't but i would rather like i'm on my phone a lot so like every single time though getting glass in it that

shit's gonna hurt yeah it will but look i enjoy the process of getting it out you know what i mean as a kid we had a lot of glass in our garage all right dr strange what do you mean you enjoy the getting it out? I like getting splinters out of my fingers. Yeah, it's like a fun process. It's like you're a surgeon. Who am I surrounded by right now? It's like you're a surgeon.

I feel endangered. I feel endangered. Why? I don't feel safe. Okay, you haven't said yours. Because y'all are blowing my mind right now. No, I'm saying like when I was a kid, we had a lot of glass in our garage, so I'd purposely walk into the garage barefooted, and then I would yell to my mom, Mom, I got glass in

my foot, and I enjoyed the feeling of forgetting it out. Okay, whoa got glass in my foot you're going too far with the feet oh feet and fingers are two different things but it's just like the glass process of getting it out it's like a thrill it's like quick surgery okay you need um you're going too far now i lost you booger breath are we i'm going agree withree with me. Oh, Cameron. Oh, I gotta go glass on fingers. Yeah! You enjoy getting it out, Cam! Dude, biting your tongue is like hell on earth.

And you enjoy getting glass out of your fingers. I don't enjoy anything about it. But I think my hands touch stuff, hit things all the time. Oh, no. They'd be less sensitive than my tongue. Yeah. When you bite your tongue, you're shit out of luck. No, that shit hurts.

I bit a piece of my tongue off one time. Me and Sanjan were battling. You said grow back? Wait, battling? You have tongue battles? Like you're like tongue punching each other? No, we were basically fighting on the basketball court. Banging, banging, banging.

And Sanjan had the ball. He gives me a mean pump fake. I jump up to block it with every bone in my body. Obviously he didn't because it's a pump fake. And then he jumps up. His head went straight into the bottom of my jaw. I bit a piece of my tongue off. It was instant blood. Instant blood. a piece Yeah, it was instant blood. Yeah instant blood. It was like

Pip I was dripping blood immediately. I was like ran to the bathroom. I picked me up I'd put it back though your tongues your fastest growing part of your body. That's going this is the thing though. Is it skin? What is it? But okay, but listen to this I think The reason I'm saying that is because I think I can live without my tongue You can't even talk imagine. Yes, you can't talk with a lot of old people don't have time. Yeah, I can hear you Hi Your eyes can see your tongue moving. No, you can't Your tongue is touching grab my tongue grab it that white ass yeah I'm doing your tongue is touching the roof your mouth I'm watching it happen you can't tell me

what I'm doing with my tongue no I'm not you you can't see your tongue I can go hi no it's not no it's not it is moving so much. It's moving Payton. You simple-minded fool. Oh my god It's why this hell Stop it stop right now pain put that shit away. I don't ever want to see your fucking tongue again. Oh my god Oh my god. I've never been told I have your regular tongue Oh my god Do it again OH MY

I'm done I'm done Oh my god I have a fucked up tongue It's gross bro Wait what what what It's pretty bad It's like everyone else's goes like this yours goes like this Payton it's it's wide No my god Everyone else goes everyone else's goes like this yours goes like this

That's why Payton has that damn list because his tongues like is like this. It's like a... This is the shape of Peyton's tongue. Most people's is like this. This is f***ing Peyton's. It's like... Wait, I've never been to... Do this. Do this with your tongue. Go like this. And then size it. Oh my god, it's so big. Oh my god! Now we do it with ours. Y'all got pencil tongues.

Sorry, Bigfoot or Big Tongue Mouth Sandal Tongue Having Ass. Oh my god, I'm never going to be able to unsee that. You floppy tongue. Wait, what's wrong with my tongue? Oh my god. I've never been told I got a strange tongue. Oh god. I like my tongue.

I didn't choose to thought to hit you for whatever reason. Damn. I'm so sorry. Babe, do you still love me? I really don't I'm gonna beat your ass I do love you less After today

I want that to be known To the world Alright let's go I think it's time for People's favorite segment You know what that is I still love you Just don't look for

Any more kisses Pop culture Paying in cam Pop culture Paying in cam And we live I got a pop culture She went and we've

And we've Pop culture We'll make it really quick Because we're running Out of time here Let's do it Quick quick quick quick quick Nick him. And Liv. I got a pop culture. She went and Liv. And Liv. Pop culture. We'll make it really quick because we're running out of time here. Let's do it. Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick. Let's talk about our friends over at A&P. Oh, God. So I was going to talk about this on the, we'll talk about this more on the.

Leave me, please. We'll go into an extended episode that's on Patreon. We'll talk more in depth about it because I'm going to talk about it. I have some real insight to the situation. But on here, I'll give you the brief breakdown. So, if you know the biggest Twitch streamer in the world, Kai Sanat, we actually were with him not too long ago at DreamCon

and Duke Dennis and Agent and all of them. We hung out with them at DreamCon. Phantom. Duke Dennis, Kai, and Agent were all arrested this weekend. kai and phantom they're part of this big group called amp the biggest streaming group on twitch they kai said hey we wanted to have this meetup and a giveaway in new york in the middle of new york and he said we're gonna give away ps5s different things right got there and it caused a riot now

yes some people were there to meet their favorite streamer most people were there because they're like oh we're kids and we have no responsibility and we don't have any good parents at home so we're going to cause riots yep and we're going to pick up paint and do stuff in that now kai i think kai got bailed out of jail i mean he's getting charged with three different things so he'll have to go to court again and hopefully he doesn't get charged uh i don't know what duke and uh agent got charged for but um yeah did y'all see that how'd you feel about it i mean i'm torn because yes i don't think he had any intent to cause any of that but at at the same time, you have to understand who you are and what your platform is.

Yeah. Like, you're the biggest streamer on Earth, and you just said you're giving away free things that people would quite literally fight and break things for. Like, bro, PS5. It's not like he's giving out a baseball card. Yeah. He's giving out $500 systems. He said PS5s and PCs.

How many did he give out? I don't think he gave out any because there's two. You said... Oh, shit. That's like someone saying, hey, I'm going to be here at this location with tons of valuable items. Right. Giving them away to people.

And you have a huge platform. Like, he didn't have a permit. He didn't ask for permission. Like, you just... You can't really do that. This is the thing. I think it was a great idea, poor management of it. Horrible.

And this is what I was going to talk about. I'm going to talk about more of this on the extended that comes out on Wednesday, I think. Something around there. I'm going to talk more in depth about it. But I blame Kai's team around him. Because if you're that big, you're there to manage Kai and his ideas. If he has an idea, it's your job to make it happen. And happen in the right way.

Yeah. So he comes to you with this idea. You're not just like. Oh. Cool. Go do it. It's a great idea. But let me go talk to the city.

Get the permits. Let me go get the infrastructure. The security. The rails. The ropes. The stage. Whatever. Yeah.

Like they pulled up. And someone said it best. Do you think they were just going to wait in line? Like. Oh. Let me wait for my PS5. No. They're going to be pushing. Shoving. so i don't i i do know i mean kai should have been smarter and i don't think he had any intent on that happening i don't think he had zero malicious intent but you have like it's but but but again that's on his team that is advise him

to do that's what you get paid for is to advise and do that now bro but okay but but this is what i was gonna say remember a couple not much ago but it was a while ago and we were like you know how easy it is for us to just go let's have a meetup and we were gonna have it right there at clyde warren we're just gonna go walk out there back then it would have been fine right yeah we can't do that anymore but we wouldn't know that unless this happened right we i think me and you still would have been like let's just go to clyde warren put it on the thing so everybody meet up here we wouldn't have thought to go to dallas we wouldn't have thought to go get we would have got security for ourselves but we wouldn't have got the right infrastructure to do it because we don't you don't think like that you think i want to go meet the

people that give us a living i want to meet the people that love us and we love and just talk to them and hang out. See, I agree. But at the end of the day, I was talking about us. I know. So at the end of the day, if we were to do something that backfires on us, whose fault is it? At the end of the day, it all comes on us. Yeah. But honestly, though, you can't.

You can't. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. So it all comes back to us no matter who said yes no matter who said no exactly we pulled the trigger so the reason i say that with kai is because i also think that what you just said is also from inexperience but kai has has he has he done that before though i'm talking about experience in fame he's been famous for as long as we've been on the pot he's not been famous for that long but he's been his growth has been crazy it's not really he's

been streaming for my take on it three years how can you control someone else's actions like all those people that acted like that exactly how did he know that they were going to respond that way he did that's obvious he has no okay then so it's just like how can you blame him for people jumping and being stupid that's not his fault it's not his, how can you blame him for people jumping and being stupid? That's not his fault. It's not his fault. That's like if we had the meetup, right? Exactly.

We would never expect somebody to do that. We might be, like, there's going to be a couple, like, there might be some crazy people up there. Like, they might act up as our security there for to protect us. But we would, if somebody, if we had a meetup at Clyde Warren and somebody picked up a fucking firework and they just bammed it in the middle of Clyde Warren. Like, we're done. We it and we're like and going we're like we just trying to have a meetup and then that causes this person to do that and then it becomes a full thing yes it goes on to us but like we wouldn't even thought in our minds that somebody would do that but we also we

also didn't say hey we're giving out free things we were going to high value we were going to give out stuff at our meetup it would have been like cheaper shit but even if we would do that you can't say that we'd have been like oh we got to prepare somebody throw a brick through a car that's true and you gotta think about where it is though too like in new york city in my mindset like i'm always asking permission first like we wouldn't have came we wouldn't who do we ask who are you gonna call dallas pd that's it we weren't get like that's a different thing though we are nowhere near his level of people of followers right and we weren't giving out things of 500 600 700 value

i agree with you but i think you're playing monday morning quarterback right now i don't know what that means monday morning quarterback so you watch nfl sunday and then on monday you come back you're like oh tom brady should have done that he should have done you're saying it's easy to play money it's easy to go back and say you should have done this it is you already saw it you already saw it happen but i don't think we would even be talking about this if it wouldn't happen like i don't think i honestly don't think if we would be like let's go plan a meet up when we go to la we would not have been let's go call the city of los angeles and be like let's go plan a meetup when we go to la we would not have been let's go call the city of los angeles and be like let's go get make sure we have the permits and the thing

like we wouldn't even know that's the first time he's ever done that yeah it's the first time he's done that yes he's big and he should be know his response he should know the gravity that comes with his words right and like the impact he has on a generation he's a generational talent but that's his team's fault yeah that's like if we go to the live show and our agent doesn't have xyz for us and like doesn't have the precautionary stuff that we need or whatever doesn't have the fire hazard stuff the safety code shit like yeah we know we need that but like it's not our responsibility i know technically it is but it's not you know what i mean it's like a pyramid it all starts here and then it kind of like trickles down to like

making sure. I mean, I agree. I don't, I think it's crazy that he can get, that he can get charged with all that stuff. I don't, I don't agree with that because that's another part with the law. It's like, how are you, how in the, how on this, on God's green earth, are you going to charge me for inciting something when I didn't? Yeah. But you're not going to charge the people that actually bricked these cars and stomped through glass and broke out in fights. I think it's just easier to charge him. It's easy to charge him because his face and his name.

But that's bullshit. It is bullshit. That's what I'm saying. Is it his fault? Bro, honestly, I'm torn. He bears some responsibility. He has a responsibility because he said that, but it's not his fault. Yeah, it's not his fault.

It's like he said, hey, I'm going to be here. That's what I'm saying. If you're giving out something like that, I think a meet and greet is different. I truly believe if he said, hey, we're doing a meet and greet. I don't think it would have been different. Because those PS5s never came out of the car. But they knew they were in the car. I doubt 90% of those have been different. Because those PS5s never came out of the car. But they knew they were in the car. I doubt 90% of those people gave a shit about those PS5s.

Honestly, though, I saw it firsthand when we were leaving DreamCon and he was pulling out. Yeah. Those. They were chasing the SUV at DreamCon. They were chasing that little SUV. He didn't have a shit on him. Nothing. But that's also my point.

I don't think they cared about him. He had nothing on him. He's leaving out and he knows people body his car. So now imagine telling everyone where. So look, that was no communication, and people surround his car. So now imagine telling the internet that you're going to be at this location at this time with a truck full of shit that a lot of people want. And now think about the magnitude.

So, yes, it's his team's fault. I think you're naive to think that the kids there, the kids that were there, they were children, little immature children that were there, gave a shit about that PS5. No. They cared about it.

Kai Sinat, and then they, to get them there... The hype around it. Kai Sinat could have had a fucking... He could have had shit in a box, and they would have came and be like, he has shit in a box for us. 100%. The Riot and that were two separate things.

The PS5s, I think they had no factor in that riot. I think that riot would have happened regardless. I think it's because Kyson and I was there, and there was 10,000 other kids that have no parenting at home and do not act. All right. Cam, get us out of here. All right, guys. My wife eats boogers. I'm not giving her a kiss for four days.

That's a guarantee. Whatever. I'll take a picture of us kissing right after this and post it everywhere. I will not kiss you for the rest of the day. 100%. Hashtag boogers and I've been giving her a kiss for four days. That's a guaranteed thing. I'll take a picture of us kissing right after this and post it everywhere. I will not kiss you for the rest of the day, 100%. Hashtag boogers. Hashtag no kiss. Hashtag booger lips. So as you know, we love you.

Thank you for watching this episode. Next week, back here, same exact time. Everything you need to know is linked in the description below. Midnight. Midnight. Tonight on the 7th. Yes. We're going to be on TBS. Did you not know that? I was like, what the hell? Yes, midnight tonight on the 7th yes we're gonna be on tbs did you not know that i was like what the hell yes midnight tonight go to tbs whatever i don't know the number i was

gonna say our number locally but tbs is a different number for you probably and watch us play basketball again uh midnight tonight on tbs but get your good karma confusing casuals leave it on everywhere let's go with the secret code this week of I got one LeB LeB live live eats boogers. I was gonna say BB booger breath Comments on Instagram everywhere tiktok lives anything all that. We love you patreon going crazy koala club We love you, and we have a dream con vlog. hopefully coming out soon. That as well as other things. I was just saying hopefully soon. They've been waiting.

That as well as other things. We love y'all. One out of ten Koala Bears. Don't make it on to Christmas. We will see you next time. No they don't. What did you say? I couldn't hear you.

Okay. Bust out roll the avalanche.