You Should Know Podcast - I DATED YOUR GIRLFRIEND! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: July 8, 2024

TOUR TICKETS: https://linktr.ee/youshouldknowpodcast?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=cf28649f-95a7-4878-8701-fc4ea9c2f071 NEW MERCH: https://youshould-know.shop/password PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/YouShouldKnowPodcast FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/people/You-Should-Know-Podcast/61552092953106/ NEW TWITCH CHANNEL: https://m.twitch.tv/peytonhardin/home Peyton’s Polaroids: https://instagram.com/peytonpolaroids?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== TRUE VAULT ESCAPADES: https://youtube.com/@AtomicWolf54 0:00 FINAL SHOW OF TOUR 1:49 CAM JOINS! 6:15 WE THREW UP ON THE PLANE! 8:48 Buying COND*MS IN AIRPORT 13:29 MEN CAN QUE*F? 14:33 BOOKING.COM 15:39 DATING FLIGHT ATTENDANTS 17:53 Peytons Mouth is Numb/Rotten 21:38 Your Snacks Are HUGE 25:00 The Eating Habits DEBATE 27:35 Cam Cleans & Cooks For Peyton 30:14 Mama Hardin RETIRED 31:24 HARRYS 32:55 THE 7/11 DEBATE 41:09 Paying For Food Before Served? 43:24 BETTER HELP 44:48 Most Insane Question EVER 47:33 THE DOG DEBATE! 54:05 HEINEKEN 0.0 55:21 CAM POOPED HIMSELF IN PUBLIC 1:00:36 Learning Our Bodies 1:02:25 SAW A M*RDER CONFESSION 1:08:48 LIQUID IV 1:10:25 New Technologies After Jail 1:13:26 Testing Our Love Languages 1:22:37 How Do Cameras Work? 1:24:12 DR.P (My Husbands Girlfriend) 1:30:29 ANNOUNCEMENTS Todays Sponsors: BetterHelp: https://www.betterhelp.com/get-started/?slug=ysk&utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=2520&utm_term=ysk&promo_code=ysk&landing_page_img=https%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fkiaehr7.png&aff_channel=podcast&discount_rate=10&discount_period=P1M&date_interval=P1M&percentage_off=10&amount=1&amount_spelled_out=one&unit=month&gor=start-go LiquidIV: https://www.liquid-iv.com Booking.com: BOOK YOUR NEXT TRIP! https://www.booking.com Harry’s: https://www.harrys.com/lpg/us-podcast/?utm_source=You%20Should%20Know%20Podcast&utm_medium=new-podcast&utm_campaign=ft-lp-redeem&name=You%20Should%20Know%20Podcast%20listeners%21%20Your%20discount%20has%20been%20applied YouShouldKnow P.O. BOX 191564 2825 Oak Lawn Ave Dallas, Texas 75219 FOLLOW PEYTON: https://instagram.com/psh8?igshid=ZDg1NjBiNjg= JOIN THE DISCORD: https://discord.gg/V5WYhSte2R Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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The You Should Know Podcast. The You Should Know Podcast. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast. Episode 120. Round of applause please we are back hey everybody welcome back to the you should know podcast episode 120 if you're new here if you know where you look below you subscribe but this is pressed you're wrong even look even more below that you see that compensation isn't fulfilled with your name guess what even more wrong go and feel that i'll get your good karma we have one show left on this summer tour round

of applause for every single city we've come to on this summer tour yeah yep yep this tour has been everything and more y'all have been so supportive, so nice, and we have one left. Houston, Texas, I have a call to action for you. That intro when we walk out on that stage, that outro when we leave the stage, and all the time in between, I need the most energy. You should know podcast team needs the most energy because we're not touring again for a year,

so let's leave on a great, great memory. Also, we have another thing to celebrate while we're out in vegas the day of the show actually we hit 600 000 subscribers on youtube round of applause for 600 000 subscribers on youtube we're on the road to 1 million subscribers and i feel like we can get that by the end of the year so please share this with your friends your family your lovers your haters your grandma your grandpa, your family, your lovers, your haters, your grandma, your grandpa, your mommies, your daddies, your unkies, and your pappies. We love you so much.

And on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. We got co-host Cam back in the studio. Let me see it. Let me see it. Tag team champions, me and co-host Cam back in the studio. Let me see it. Let me see it. Tag team champions, me and Coach Cam. Yeah. Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, God. Already. Not going to lie, Cam. How was your week, Bubba? Champion of the world. Yes or no, is I playing with my own nipple with my ring finger? How you doing? Good morning.

So have you tried the nipple play? Have I tried the nipple play? With yourself. Not with yourself, but on you. Oh, no. Oh, then what are you? Oh, ew. I don't want to hear about that.

I have a wife. Hello. Good morning, too. Hi, Cameron. I love my wife. Cam, I need to take that from you. I need to take that from you because you're going to play with it the whole episode. That's called ADHD.

How we doing? Well, CJ, quick edit, huh? How we doing, Bubba? How you feeling? I've seen you so much recently. I'm feeling great. We've spent a long time together. I love every second of it.

I hope to God you do. I know you don't, but I hope you do. I do. Our week was a fantastic one. Fantastic week. Fantastic. It started off in Phoenix.

Hot. Hot as dog shit. Hot. You know, there was multiple people In the meet and greet That said We simply asked What do you do for fun here

They said oh we don't go outside We don't go outside We'll melt I said why do you live here Yeah exactly I don't even care if you were born here Your family Your whole legacy is here

Leave Yeah I said So like what Y'all don't do outdoor activities And they said no That seems like a miserable existence Remember those Remember those At the end of the show?

Love to death. They were sweet people. We go outside. It's like 99 at like 11 o'clock at night. They're like, oh, this is fantastic. This feels great. Oh, yeah. I'm sweating through my thong right now. I said, I'm sweating like a church talking about this feels great. I need to get inside.

And two men at the meet and greet tried to bed me. Oh no they did. They said come to the bar. I've never been grabbed like that before by a man. So let's take this picture. I said God bless thee.

Oh my God I didn't even tell you. What happened? Oh you talked to them? No in Vegas. Oh yeah. I did tell you. In Vegas. Two girls tried to bed me in front of my dad yeah it was nut work uh i'm actually gonna retract from what you don't want to say you're gonna tell me off camera i'll tell you on the extended okay but there's one thing i want to say right let's hear it okay so we lost off my week though it was really good my it was back to me my week was fantastic phoenix was amazing van buren theater was great your security's expensive but uh

it was how much did we spend on security? Way too much. How much? I'm not going to say it. Go like this. For what? For Adam. For Adam! Cool guy. It was him! He didn't have a crew! He didn't have weapons on him.

What does he drive? He has to have like a Mach of a Maybach. A Hellcat and an SRT. He has to have like a Mach of a Maybach, a Hellcat, and an SRT. He has to have an amazing car. He's getting that on two, three times a week shows. Yeah, no, that guy's making money. He didn't even have an earpiece. He was Captain America.

He had a security meeting with CJ. Yeah, he said, oh, you're going to go through this exit. It pops off. It pops off, like you with the rate we're giving you, you better have flashbangs and claymores at every door. There's no way someone should be able to come in here with what we're paying

you. And if that's the going rate, it said you had to show the next day, the next. He's making more than Steve Jobs. It is unbelievable how much that young man's made. Adam Bezos. Yeah. Adam Bezos, Steve Jobs. It is unbelievable how much that young man's made. He's Adam Bezos. Adam Bezos, Adam Jobs. It is unbelievable. Oh my god.

Power to you and you have a hell of a handshake. Oh my god, hurt me. It started in the Van Buren. The week was fantastic. Fantastic week in the Van Buren. Great week. Looks like a dog. Anyway, fantastic week. Yes or no, did we watch the presidential debate in our green room an hour before the show? Oh my god. Not gonna even touch too too much into it oh it's good to get a couple giggles

off before you get on stage it's always good oh my god very good giggles we are in a country i love this so van buren's fantastic again you already know the full-blown the details and everything all the funnies all the behind the scenes that'll be on patreon patreon um link in the yeah link the links below the actual link is below now go on over there it's not just words i'm just kidding link in the below it is hot okay full recap there boom and went to vegas fantastic vegas before vegas yes i saw something hottest it was before vegas we had to get on an airplane that's how you get places the man that threw up Before Vegas, I saw something. Hottest dog ass. It was. Before Vegas, we had to get on an airplane.

That's how you get places. The man that threw up in the bathroom? No. Oh, okay. No. Okay. There was a man that threw up right next to me in the bathroom. Explain.

He was about 80. I walk into the bathroom in Phoenix Airport, whatever the hell that's called, and I literally hear... I turn around, and this old guy standing at a whopping five foot three god bless him he's like he doesn't have to lean over for the sink his head's just in the sink god bless him shit was coming up in a public sink is is wild behavior god you know what's worse though what throwing up on a plane hey live my wife threw up 35,000 feet in the air. She does get motion sickness.

And Ashlyn's sick ass. She needs help. They're holding like a teddy bear. Oh, my God. So we land. We land. We get a text from the groomess that says, Cam, your wife threw up on the plane. Because Cam didn't see the text yet.

I look back at Ashlyn. Ashlyn has a double gray Walmart sack. And she's going, like, it's Halloween night. She said, Ashley needs therapy. Let's put that out there. She's not well in the head. We love her to death. She is a nurse in the ICU, and she's way too comfortable with things that humans shouldn't be.

Yeah, nothing phases that woman, and I'm starting to be scared for my friend. We were walking in Vegas. This guy's almost borderline calling it quits on the street like he had something was going on it was a heat stroke something she's like oh double tracheotomy he'll be all right he'll probably be down for a couple months let's keep it pushing I said what are you talking about I said what do you how do you just look at him and know that she's like no let's go to the fountains I'm like there is a there was a point when I used to get scared like when Ashley used to go out to clubs I used to get scared when I would get 3 a.m. texts from Ashlyn.

She would text me at 3 a.m. when she was leaving a club, and she'd be like, I swear to God, this is a real text I got. She goes, I saved this guy's life. He got shot in front of me, and I put a tourniquet on him and put my thumb in his leg. What, Ashlyn? And then sends me a picture of it. Literally.

Guy gets, okay, not going to go into too much detail. It's a federal investigation, but guy gets shot. She literally whips off belt, tourniquets his leg, puts pressure. She sends a picture of bloody hands. She's like, yeah, late night. Got to clock in tomorrow morning. Saved the guy's life

though. Fun. Tequila kind of ran out of me as soon as I had to get sober. I go, what? No, yeah. Pray for our friends. BetterHelp. Yeah, betterhelp.com slash YSK. But we were leaving Phoenix. We were going to Vegas, right? We did. Go to the airport. There's a question I have, and it's a very strange thing I saw.

And I need somebody to explain this to me. I don't know what you're about to say. You know there's these little marts in airports, right? You can go get your chip. That's a remote. They call those remotes. You can go get your chip. That's a remote. They call those remotes. You can go get a chip. Chip.

You can go get a drink, a beverage. A drink beverage. Ibuprofen. Ibuprofen. Tylenol. Tylenol. Yeah. Books and magazines.

Books and magazines. Kit Kats or Snickers. Exactly. Careful. Can't do ands. Snickers. At least say Snickers. Snickers. You can get Kit Kats. Stop! You cans. Snickers. At least say snickers.

You can get Kit Kats. Stop! You can get Kit Kats. Stop! God. Okay. Well, I was also, I was looking at the array because I was getting my medicines because I have a, we're not going to get into it. You need help as well.

Let's just, let's get into it. Let's get into it. I was getting my medicines for the plane. Yeah. What all you take? None of your business. Oh, okay. They call they call you odp that's what they call you they call you odp odp odp odp you know me you know me yeah okay you need help why the hell they sell condoms in the airport they sell they sell condoms in the airport. They sell condoms? They sell condoms in the airport. And I have questions on who is the intended market. Are they promoting sex on the plane?

Flight attendants. They get off the plane. They have a couple hours. A little, what is it called? A little downtime. A little layover. Oh, they're not going to a hotel. They got Sky Lounge.

Oh my God, it gets freaky in the Sky Lounge. They go in there, get smoked old fashioned. They say, hey, Craig, knock me up. I got a six-hour flight back to Birmingham. What's good, dog? What if a girl said that to you? Hey, knock me up.

I'm getting back on a flight. I don't like it. I didn't know what to do in college, so I became a flight attendant. Come on. No, I'm just saying. No, I didn't mean that in a rude way. I'm saying that if a flight I don't like it I didn't know what to do in college So I became a flight attendant Come on No I'm just saying No I didn't mean that in a rude way I'm saying that If she's saying that

That's a problem of mine If a girl says that to me That directly Yeah she goes Hey guy You look good Put it in I'd be like

It's too late It's already in my pants She goes Ain't nothing to do Ain't nothing to do But Ain't nothing to do But to unbox it

No I'm saying The job is done If a woman is that direct If a woman was that direct I'd be like The job would be done I'd be like No, I'm saying the job is done. If a woman is that direct with me, the job would be done? I'd be like, I almost got myself pregnant. She blows a kiss and you just go, oh. She's like, hey, hairy boy.

And you look like that? She goes, hey, electrocuted man. Go ahead and stick it in before I get back on the plane. Come on, dog. And you just go, oh. This is a wild start. Okay, but no, dead ass. Because I was looking. I was like, are they promoting the Mile High Club?

They might be. And who's out here doing Mile High Club? I can't walk on planes, let alone make sex. How can you make a duo pound? Let me see that one more time. How can you make a duo pound? Let me see that one more time. How can you make a duo's pound? How can you make a duo's pound? I call that the butt clench stroke.

Here we go. That's efficient. Let's say. Right in here. And hear it. You want a regular guest or a flight attendant? Flight attendant. Flight attendant.

Frisky on 120. Wait. Let's. No. No. No. You can't say. I gotta mute it?

Hey, let's go into DC. Mute it. Mute it. All right. Let's just say. Let's just say. What's your name? You say.

Okay. Okay. Let's say. Let's say. Let's say we get on that plane, right? We're on it. 20,000 feet in the air. We net 36,000, but it's close enough.

We're still on the ascend. We're ascending. We're still ascending, right? They start bringing out drinks. Put your tray tables out. Phone holders must be stowed. Phone holders and seat backs have to be stowed. It's like it's tough to be normal.

Just say put this shit up. Yeah, just say put it up. Okay. Okay. Gather with me. I'm not going to lie, the flight attendant asked me for rubbage before we landed.

I almost... Where are you from? Scotland? Rubbage? Rubbage? Wait. Wait. Rubbage?

Rubbage. Or rubbish? Rubbage. Then that person was just fucking with you. I don't know what rubbish is. Rubbage. Rubbish. That's person was just fucking with you. I don't know what rubbage is. Rubbage. Rubbish. That's rubbish.

I think it's rubbish. That's rubbish. Is trash rubbish? Yes. You call it rubbish? Yeah. Oi, whales. You call it rubbish?

Rubbish. But you know what I was talking about, though. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so we're on the plane. We're ascending, right? Up in the air. As soon as we hit the flat thing, bing, bing, seatbelt signs undone. They're coming around with drinks.

We now know. Yeah. Because we're now a part of the Mile High Drinking Club. Oh, yes. We felt it. Nice. Two Jack and Cokes, and we were in the Mile High Club. Oh, my God.

Just imagine a poot up there. That's what I'm saying. So let's, a what? A fart? A front poot. A queef? What are you, a front poot? Can we queef? What are you... A front... Can we queef?

No, no. If I could queef, I would queef everywhere. I would queef on it. I would queef so much. Would you rather have a million dollars right now or the ability to queef for the rest of your life? Queef. Turn that fan on. It's hot. You're gonna need to queef for the rest of your life. Ah!

Turn that fan on, it's hot! Alright, stick with me, stick with me, you queefing bastard! Oh! That's dirty. Oh man, queef. That's sick as f***. Where did it come from? Like your sack in the shaft just hits together.

All right, relax. What was that? What are you extending? The You Should Know Podcast. This episode of the You Should Know Podcast is brought to you by Booking.com. Booking. Yeah. It's finally time for summer travel, and we could not be more excited.

I'm very excited. Booking.com offers so many possibilities across the entire U.S. for all the travelers you want to be this summer. I'll be taking a trip to Los Angeles after towards my little vacation. Oh, you love it. Oh, my God, and I'm looking forward to leaning into my LA side. You know that Hollywood Boulevard. I just about tell you. Hollywood Boulevard.

Little smoothies in the morning. Good walks down Sunset Boulevard. A little coffee bean. Oh my God. When I'm there, it is going to be great. And I thank Booking.com. Booking.com's wide breadth of places to stay across the US make booking whoever you want to be this summer so easy.

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All right. Plane. Damn it. Relax. Cut that back to it. Okay, here we go. On the plane, we get the drinks. Oh, say it.

We're two drinks in. Yeah. Flight attendant comes up. Yeah. She goes, hey, I saw that video that you were talking about condoms. Who's the target? Yeah. I'm the target. We got two hours till we land. Nice. Who's the target? Yeah. I'm the target.

We got two hours till we land. Nice. Meet me in the back bathroom. I need two minutes. It'll say... Two hours? Who am I? Lance Armstrong?

Who the fuck am I trying to impress? You know what I mean? Give me 45 seconds on a good day. Golly. You know what I mean? That's not even the thing. Listen. She tells you, right right she tells you right

she tells you hey you are blazing hot you are attractive as shit i like you and all your dandruff and your scruffy beard okay she says that to you and she goes what's that smell i think that's my queef sorry she goes yeah i'm gonna be in the back employees only thing bathroom it's gonna say locked You're a big guy It's going to be a tight squeeze She sees the wink She goes There is a 50% chance

That we get caught And you're on a no fly list And I lose my job But there's also I don't care about you There's also a 50% chance That this will be the best Four and a half minutes of your life

You flipping that coin Or are you staying in 24F? What does she look like? Seven out of 10, but because we're in the sky and two drinks in, she's at 8.3. 8.3. It's too high. She's got that little ascot.

She's got a name badge. It's too high for me. 7.5. Lower. Six and a half. Lower. 5.4. That's where I like to stay.

I like to stay around. She's a 5.4. We're in the sky. She's the six. Two drinks in. 50% chance. Heads or tails. No. No fly list or fantastic five minutes.

No, I wouldn't do it. You wouldn't do it? I say all this for jokes. I wouldn't do that. Genuinely, I wouldn't. Now talk to me when we land. So when you land, she has a three-hour layover. What are you doing?

Okay. What are you? Are you getting your little fantasy off on me? No. My fantasy is my wife. No, I'm saying. She would slap me. She would slap me if I asked wife. No, I'm saying. She would slap me. She would slap me if I asked her.

No, I'm saying you have fantasies about me. You like to watch me. What? What? Through the glass. I'm like this. I go. This is bad.

All right, back to reality. Hey, let me say something. God. The roof of my mouth has been. Okay. I ate like a pound of pork rinds last night. And this part of my mouth is literally sore and stings. You ate a pound of pork...

That's like a whole bag. A pound of chicharrones is crazy. Of who? Chicharrones. Is that the brand? That's Spanish for pork rinds. Pigskins. Chicharrones.

Chicharrones. You ate a pound... You ate 16 ounces of chicharrones. Of chicharrones, yeah. Oh, your shit was screaming for help. Oh, my God. Did you bleed? Oh, I can't tell if it's from the chicharrones or my gingivitis. I think it's from the gingivitis.

Typically, when you eat sharp chips, you bleed. I've noticed that. I've noticed that. Is that you that I smell on every plane ride? Is that you? No, I'm tired of you saying that. I'm not going to lie to you. I'm tired of you saying that. I'm tired of you you that i smell on every plane ride is that you no i'm tired of saying that i'm tired of saying that i'm tired of saying that every single flight in it oh my i think it is you no it's not because every single flight toward the descent you'll wake up you go

you're like and right when you wake up i smell beef and cheddar every time it's it's like a creamy it's like velveta and jack links and i smell it every plane ride at first, I thought it was that one flight attendant that she ate that Buffalo sandwich in the back when we were going to D.C. It's not her. Because it's the same smell. And I'm deductive reasoning. I'm like, okay, we're on a whole different plane. Hell, we're on a different airline.

Hell, they're not even eating now. Hell, it's got to be someone buying me because I'm smelling it every plane. It's the same smell. It's like Velveeta and beef jerky, velveta and teriyaki jack links was it the same flight where you couldn't access your tray table let's use deductive reasoning okay no it's every flight that one i could i could have blamed it on her but outside of that no i literally couldn't use my my accessible trays table i couldn't use it i I said, excuse me. I had to hit her way to get it. It was bad. It was bad.

Is that you? What is that? Okay, no, no, no. Because it's not there when you're asleep. But the second you wake up, I'm smelling the beef jerky. Yeah, no, yeah. No, yeah. No, yeah.

What? No, okay. Fart, breath. No, it's because I have medicine in me, right? And that already dries me out a little bit. Can we talk about that? No. I want to see the comments that say, no, let's do it.

No, I can't, no. Okay. No. Just know he takes medicine. I take medicine before the play. Real medicine, no jokes. But a lot of it. A lot of it.

No, I don't. CJ, is it a lot? No. Okay. Is it a lot? No, it's not. I'm 6'7", 210 pounds. And you're taking enough that can tranquilize a deer.

That's why I always get knocked out at the same time. She's asleep before we even take off. Every time. He'll literally be like, dude, yeah, isn't it crazy to dispose? And then I'll,

I'll listen to one song. I'm like, Hey bro, look at this. He's like, he's dead. He's literally like, no,

it's cause I have Cheez-Its. Hat down. You're just like, it's cause I have Cheez-Its on the plane. Oh my God. Your Cheez-Its. Hat down. You're just like. It's because I have Cheez-Its on the plane. Oh, my God. Your Cheez-Its. Oh, my God. I didn't even know.

I didn't even. Not even the smell. CJ, not even the smell. You had. Okay. So, this is a fairly new thing. There's Cheez-Its, right? Yeah.

But then they sell them toasty. I've only seen that a couple times. It says toasty Cheez-Its. They're a little burnt yeah this man to my right had cheese it's extra extra toasty and i said is this even real or is this like a third party brand i opened the bag they are brown yeah no they're black why are you even enjoying this i I had a handful. I see why. Pretty damn good.

I see why. It's like they're on a smoker. Yeah, and then wood pellets. The old ass flight attendant lady was like. She was mean. She was like, I haven't seen those either. I was like, hey, Gladys, no one was asking. Yeah, yeah.

So you sit in your seat, Helga. Put the seatbelt on. No, but it was good though. It was decent. I only had seven. I can't imagine having that whole bag. You know what's weird about you? You buy your snacks too big.

You buy snacks too big. Let's just cut the bullshit. Every time you buy a snack, it's enough for a family of four going to a movie. I swear to God. No, because... You buy snacks of like the... Not even family size. It's like value size.

It's like you buy it in bulk. Okay, yes or no, am I a big snacker though? Big snacker. Yes or no, do you ever finish them yes every time we landed in phoenix we'll cj we landed in phoenix no after we came back to eat we said ah we'll probably be hungry at night what did i grab i grabbed a singular bag of trail mix cj grabbed like a candy bar he grabbed four bags of doritos all no sun chips four bags all of them four bags of gardenitos. No, no, no. Sun chips. Four bags. I finished all of them immediately. Four bags of garden salsa sun chips in a water.

Who are you? Why so many chips? Because chips is easy for me to digest. I'm a snacker. I'm a big snacker. You're a salt guy, though. You don't like other snacks. What was that?

What'd you just do? What did you just do? Did you just see something in a fourth dimension? You literally went, you went, you were looking at your camera and you went, yeah, I'm a big snack. And like, you like, you saw something and then came back to reality. That kind of spooked me. No.

No, you, watch, you were like, I'm a big snack guy though, aren't I? Then you came back. It was, or sorry, that was creepy. No, okay. Oh no. No, okay. Oh, no. No, bro. No, you need a break. Okay.

Oh, he's snorting. Okay. He's gone. Okay, I can't eat meals. We know. I can't eat meals very well. We know. But snacks.

I could kill some snacks. I ate a pound of chicharrones yesterday. What? What? What? What? snacks i ate a pound of chicharrones yesterday what what what okay for our koala club members okay when we were shooting the micro center vlog when cj went to go see micro center peyton came along for the journey all the fun shit right boom we buy everything we come back to the house it's time to build it he goes oh y'all got that shit i'm gonna watch your honor yeah we're like two hours into building it and i see you with this fat ass bag of popcorn watching your show i'm hungry me and cj are working i come over that shit was like i was chewing on a fruit roll-up and it was popcorn it was so stale i checked the

guys this is like a two pound bag of but it's like one of those it's like a carnival it's like three-fourths huge bag he's just laying on his stomach eating it nasty feet around hair crazy watching his show i come up get a handful it literally was like this like rubber and i go what the hell are you eating he goes oh just some stale popcorn i look at the expiration date it It was like four months expired. No, okay. Four months expired. Okay, so I got that as a housewarming gift when I moved into my house, which was like over a year ago.

And I needed snacks for your honor. I have to watch my shows with snacks. Oh, y'all. Peyton. What? Peyton, you got that as a housewarming gift do you know when you moved in november october or november okay we did that last month in june yeah so that shit probably expired around february you know what i'm getting sick and tired of is y'all always telling me

what's wrong with me and my body. I am sick of it. Yes, sir. Okay. I have eating problems. Yeah. I'm not going to lie. And we're not shaming you for it.

I just. Okay. I'm a sideline. I'm a coach. I'm not in the game with you. I'm a coach. Would you rather be like me and nibble on food or would you rather be a dumpster rat like Cam? Right?

And literally. I'd rather be a healthy fed dumpster rat like cam right and literally be healthy fed i have seen cam walk in restaurants when we're leaving and ask people if they're done with their fries never cam yes or no cam yes or no have we walked by empty tables right when before the cleaning said the bus the table buses get up there and you have eaten people's shit off the plate yes or cam cam lie in front of me and jesus i've not eaten shit off people i asked for. Yes, sir. Cam? Cam, lie in front of me and Jesus. I've not eaten shit off people's plate. Come on! I asked for the salsa, but that's salsa. That was one time. I asked for the salsa. They never touched it.

The waiter brought out new chips and salsa. I said, hey, y'all mind if I get that real quick? I've never eaten off someone's plate. Cam, you've looked at me and asked for approval, but you knew I would ridicule you, and you said, okay. What was that word? Ridicule? There you go.

There you go. It was a fat tongue getting in the way. What did I say? And you knew that I'd ridicule you. You said it weird. I can't even mess it up. I've never eaten off somebody's plate. Don't believe him for half a second.

I did ask for salsa. I did ask for salsa. Your suitcase is on your stairs. Your suitcase is on your stairs. Well, he's on one today. We've been back for 48 hours. You brought it up? Okay, guys. We've been back for 48 hours. You brought it up? Okay, guys, we've been back for 48 hours from Phoenix and Vegas trip.

Fat suitcases. We got some more stuff while we were there. A lot of stuff, right? It's not even in this room. It's not. Oh, my God. You got butt-ass naked and changed in front of me today in your kitchen. No, it was not the kitchen.

It was the laundry room. Which is connected to the kitchen. It's not the kitchen it's a laundry room which is connected to the kitchen it's in the kitchen okay i i have why are your clothes not in your bedroom okay i'm i got to admit something and i think it's getting worse with age i have i have a bad i have like a bad adhd problem thank you so i can't i can't like if something's not done i can't begin a new thing but i can't also go back and finish that one thing you know what i mean welcome well hey he's a brother in arms so like welcome to me and cj's life so my room is disgustingly dirty it looks like a tornado came around there earthquake there's shit everywhere it's awful i don't want

to bring new clothes up because i still have clothes in my room that I unpacked from Colorado. Like, my Colorado shirt is still on the floor in my mirror, like in front of my mirror. And I have, like, Whataburger canes, chips, like all that, and I can't clean it, brother. Yes, you can. I can't. I can't do it. And it's starting to make me a little sad. You know what?

I'll pay you to come clean my house. I'll do it. I'll take it. Cam, you lied to me. You were supposed to cook for me. I was going to pay you. I'm not going to tell how much I was going to pay. I also said after the tour, did I not say that?

Because how are we going to- Cam, that was a year ago. No. You were a year ago? You were a year ago. Yes, it was. That was like two months ago. No, Cam.

He wasn't here. I didn't even know who the hell this little roten was. He said that was a week ago. He's stretching. That's a stretch. That's a stretch. That's a stretch. Okay. It was like literally two months ago. Literally. Cam. It's stretching. That's a stretch. That's a stretch. Okay. It was like literally two months ago. Literally. It was

100%. That's not true. That's not true. We've been talking about this. It was before the Markel episode or it was before episode 100. Kim, we were talking about this and so I asked your sister to do it. I asked you first and I asked your sister to do it. No, you asked my sister. No, I asked you first and then you didn't ever do it so I asked your sister to do it. I was going to pay you to be my chef. And I

still will. No, you won't once the tour ends because i'm gonna start meal prepping again and i got you guys see johnny too i don't want to i don't want your nasty ass food you spent money yesterday getting gym clothes that shows you're prepared and i love that i did i did hey he's getting back in that mode no it's because i went to the gym in 120 t-shirt i said this can't happen again yeah this is absolutely not allowed back to your colorado shirt yeah being in front of your mirror you have to clean it i'm not gonna lie you're hiding something i'll pay you're hiding something i'll pay you to clean it how much how much you want it's a reasonable rate how much you i'll clean everything off i'll start laundry i'll clean

everything i'll get it in your hand but yes i know do i know actually i don't know if i want you to do my laundry do i know how to do laundry because Oh, actually, I don't know if I want you to do my laundry. Do I know how to do laundry? Cam, because after your laundry and you put on those shirts, you smell like a school bus. Peyton, my laundry smells fantastic. No, it doesn't. My laundry smells better than yours. Oh, my shit. No, it doesn't, Cam. That's why everybody says you stink.

It's me that smells like yellow. No, because you showered. You showered. Bro, it's me. It's not the clothes. You showered. And then you came back to sound check. And you had the same shirt on.

And it was the shirt that smelled like... The shirt that I sweat in for hours. But you smell like yellow after laundry. It's something. It's me. I need Botox, all right? I need a procedure. Okay, you want to pay for that?

I think it's like something right here, too. Do you have glands here? Yes, you have glands here. My glands are fine. Your glands protrude like yellow yeast. My glands do not secrete any liquid. If anything, it'd be you, fat-tongued Phil. Oh, really?

Oh, really? Bad hip Billy? Yeah, it would. Okay, you want to go? It would, you... Scruffy McSteven? Oh, yeah, Huge Head Henry. Oh, Huge Head Henry?

All right, you feral-looking wolf. All right, ADHD Andy. ADHD. Oh, you're Dr. Seuss. I'm so sorry, CJ. Dr. Seuss. Okay. Rich Boy Richie.

Not too fun, is it, huh? Not too fun. Not rich. Oh, you're not rich? No. Oh, speaking of, round of applause for Mama Harden retiring last week. Big round of applause for Mama Harden retiring last week. Big round of applause. Let's take a one-minute monologue.

30 seconds for you, 30 seconds for me. I'll go first. I'll only take 15. You can have the extra 45. Mama Harden, I absolutely love you. I've loved you ever since I met you. Hope that didn't sound weird. But you've always taken me in.

You entrusted me to take in your boy. We did it. I cracked him of his little shell we have blossomed this amazing brotherhood and it is a big thanks to you for everything that you've done for us love you so much you worked so hard now i'm glad you're done hey congrats mom thanks for working longer so i didn't live on the streets and believing in me i hope you enjoy the gift i gave you. You're so sweet and you give good hugs. You can't cook very well.

Hopefully you can pick that up in your off time. Now you got plenty of time to pick up a cookbook. Remember that one time we were kids and you set the oven on fire trying to heat up taco shells? Maybe you can learn to do that now, Mom. Love you, though. Oh.

She did not deserve it. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. The You Should Know Podcast. This episode of The You Should Know Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Harry's. P, it's happened to all of us, but getting ripped off is no joke. I hate it. Especially when there's razors involved.

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Get started with a $13 trial set for just $3 at harrys.com slash YSK. That's harrys.com slash YSK for a $3 trial set. Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. All right, we're back. Mic stand broke a little bit. Fixed it. Bob the Builder.

Bob the Builder. Oh, what's the guy? Wreck-It Ralph. Hello. I have a golden hammer. You do. More like a pink fluorescent one. My genitalia is not pink.

It reflects out of a cat. Spikes and all. Did you know pink is opposite of green? Never been one for the color scale. I failed that in art class. Okay. I wasn't going to say anything, but when we went... What did you just say?

I failed art class. Okay, that's awful. They held me after school. I wasn't going to say anything, but when we went down to 7-Eleven before the show... One of my favorite restaurants. At first, you interrupted me. But what did you just say? I like 7-Eleven.

Oh, no, no, no. You can like it, weirdo. You called it a restaurant. Okay, we're not doing this tit-for-tat shit. It has never been a restaurant. Ever in its single day in its existence. What is it? Okay, it's a gas station.

Some 7-Elevens don't sell gas. But guess what all 7-Elevens sell? Food. That doesn't make it a restaurant. What classifies a restaurant? A restaurant. They only sell food. Oh, make it a restaurant what classifies a restaurant the restaurant they only sell food oh no that's not true oh you can buy t-shirts at restaurants okay that's the merch for the restaurant that's okay i don't see 7-eleven merch unless it's worn by an employee can so it has to be so so you're saying they sell magazines they sell uh tire fluid they sell

fantastic restaurants a convenient ass restaurantass restaurant, I guess. Okay, I understand. I know, I know. I get it. And I'm not trying to argue, but I am. You get me? Peyton. Cam, listen.

What classifies a restaurant? They sell food. They're made for food. They only sell food. They don't only sell food. They might have merch, but that's it. 7-Eleven is not a restaurant. I don't care what you say.

You don't even like the food from 7-Eleven. Those dry-ass wings and the nasty cheesecake bread. They're one for a good hoagie. No, they don't sell hoagies. Holy shit! 7-Eleven doesn't sell hot dogs? They don't sell hot dogs? Hot dog isn't a hoagie.

Oh, my God. What is a hoagie? A hoagie is a whole sandwich. A hoagie roll. Oh, is that a fact? Yeah, you don't know your sandwiches. You don't know your gas station. Shut your mouth.

Okay, deadass, deadass. Cam, how is it not? Peyton. How is it not? Because there's no menu? Oh, my God. And actually, 7-Eleven does have menus. It's on the wall.

Oh, my God. There's a menu on the wall at 7-Eleven. I guess you never knew. Maybe a Quick Trip. Is Quick Trip not a restaurant? 7-Eleven has a busted AC and jacked lottery tickets. Okay, just because it's not a nice restaurant doesn't mean it's not a restaurant. If they sell food, you're a restaurant.

They sell fused vapes and lotto tickets. That's what 7-Eleven sells. They sell four locos and Uncrustables. What classifies a restaurant? You order food, you get food. You can sit down. You can dine. I've seen construction workers sit at 7-Eleven and dine.

Yes or no? Have you not seen that? It's not a restaurant. Why, Cam? Oh, God. I hate you. Okay, exactly. I won.

Just say I won. No, you didn't win shit. Okay, then how? It's not a restaurant. Okay, explain how. A hundred out of a hundred people. You are the only... You're a...

Oh, my God. You are... You want to be different. You see, Your life's goal Is to be the shepherd Not the sheep I think outside the box I like this comment section

There's no box Okay There's no box But do you understand Do you understand That your only argument right now Is it's not a restaurant It's not a restaurant

You Say something Say something Oh my god Your eyes are getting big You like to say things To where I can't I can't necessarily

You think you're a lawyer Oh my god You want to be Harvey Exactly All you can do is personal lawyer. Oh my god, you want to be Harvey. All you can do is personal insults. Talk about the argument. You want to be Harvey! It's funny how it is, restaurant, because they sell food. They sell food. You order food, you sell it, you can eat there.

They have a menu, you can eat there. Let's go with that basis. Quick Car, their restaurant. What the f*** is a Quick Car? Quick Car. You can get your oil changed, get your rotators rotated. They don't sell food. Really? I've bought a Snickers. That's not food. I food i'm talking about food oh my god can you eat a snicker okay you want to do your argument what classifies his food what's what's food it has to be hot that's a snack i'm talking about food food entrees they sell entrees okay thank you okay that's there

we go they sell entrees that's better dumbass. Five oil is not a restaurant. So hospitals are restaurants. Yes. They have restaurants in hospitals. Yes. They have hospitals in a restaurant. Is a hospital a restaurant? Because you can get an entree in your room. No, because the main point of the hospital is to get well.

It's not a point to get food. The whole point of 7-Eleven is to get food and beverage. There's gas at this 7-Eleven? Can you get gas there? No, because it's in downtown. Thank you. What does that mean? It's not a restaurant.

That's a restaurant. What is it then? What is it? Matter of fact, what is your definition of restaurant? You can buy food and eat it. You have a menu. You order food. There's not a menu.

There's not a menu. Yes, there is. There's not a menu. It says up on the thing. It says we take EBT. You should know about it. That's not. Oh, I don't know anything about that. I didn't mean that in any sort of way, but that's not a menu. It says up on the thing. It says we take EBT. You should know about it. That's not. Oh, I don't know anything about that.

I didn't mean that in any sort of way, but that's not a menu. They literally give you a glass pane to look through with their cheesy gordita rollers. That's all it is. Kim, yes or no? There's not a menu. Is there a menu? Yes. Is there a waitress?

Yes. Oh, my goodness. There's a waitress at 7-Eleven? I was saying yes to the menu. I was saying yes to the menu. You're going to 8-12. You're going to the bougie 7-Eleven. One step up.

Slow down and listen. Slow down and listen. It says $5 wings, $2 chokitos, $1 pizza slices. That is a sticker on the glass. That's not a menu, you jackass. What's a menu then? Who are you? A menu has what we're serving.

Are you a time traveler? It says what we're serving. What do you mean what's a menu? It says what we're serving and how much it is. Yes or no. Is that a menu? What's the difference between a menu, Cam? Cam, okay, so you're saying place it with a QR code and you pull on your phone, it's

not a menu because it's not on a paper plate laminated, you stupid. No, it's a whole, there's a whole menu. There's a whole menu. That is a whole menu. So size matters. It's not about the ocean or the motion. No, that is a singular sticker that says you can get a roller with a Coke for a package deal. That's not about the ocean of the motion no that is a singular sticker that says you can get a roller with a coke for a package deal that's not a menu that's a sticker

what is a menu it's multiple things it's the whole shit 7-eleven doesn't have a menu you're not winning this damn yes i do i'm gonna die early and it's not my fault dog i swear to god i'm gonna die young and it's not my fault how am My resting heart rate right now is 173. Yes or no when you go to 7-Eleven? Can you just go grab your wings? Can you grab food? Yes. No, you...

Holy shit. You got to get the... You got to get the dude behind the counter to get it for you. You go to these rank-ass 7-Elevens. Are you... At 7-Eleven, you can't grab your own hot dog and make it. Some of them, I'm sure you can. But it comes in a little half cylindrical tube.

Where are you hoping it? No, there's no doors on it. Are you crazy? So they don't have a whole tongue section where you grab your rollers, you put it in your bag. At some point, that's where the hot dogs, the hoagies I was talking about. It's not a hoagie, and that's majority of 7-Elevens. Majority. Okay, regardless.

Is a buffet a restaurant? Yes. Do you grab your own a buffet a restaurant? Yes. Do you grab your own food at a buffet? Yes. So shut the f*** up. Do buffets sell leaded and unleaded and ethanol? No, they don't. Neither does the 7-Eleven across the street.

Because it's a downtown 7-Eleven. A 7-Eleven is not a restaurant. Is it a 7-Eleven? It is a market. It sells snacks and goods and f***ing magazines. That's what 7-Eleven sells. You can literally buy a bottle of wine, a freaky magazine, and a Lunchable.

That's 7-Eleven. I think I won this one. CJ's looking at me like I won this one. You like because you're a lawyer. You're wearing a suit right now under your shirt. I'm wearing the weekend. Oh my god. You belong in Harvard Law School you you have a way

with your words you're a serpent of the tongue you like to walk little little verbal laps around me but you know you're wrong let's cut the shit i don't know 7-eleven's a gas station i understand that i i say certain things to invoke reactions at you but i still believe that i'm saying it right but no before you go no No, you are wording it right. You're wording it right. Let's just do this. If you Googled 7-Eleven, if you looked at their stock, if you looked at anything, 7-Eleven Corporation itself, what is it going to say?

If you had to put your life on it, is it going to say gas station? Is it going to say convenience store? Or is it going to say restaurant? I don't know. I'm guessing either A or B. Gas and... It would probably say food and restaurant. It would probably say food and restaurant.

Food? You didn't even say gas!... We should probably say food and restaurant. We should probably say food and restaurant. Food! You didn't even say gas! You said double food! Food and restaurant? For 7-Eleven? Yeah. Yeah. You know what I don't get about restaurants, too, that I'm starting to question?

You know what I don't get about restaurants? I need to go to the penalty box. What? I don't get why they don't make you pay i don't get why restaurants don't make you pay before you get the food that seems like a liability on all fronts i feel that but at the same time you don't it's like i feel that but i don't because you don't pay for things until it's done like you pay for the service oftentimes some places you pay before sometimes you pay after i don't think that's true you have to pay before you get your house built that's a house so it's a

it's an enchilada it's different it is you pay and then nothing comes okay but think about it you can order as much shit as you want at a restaurant you can just order order order and i eat that as soon as i eat that or I can just take your plates and go. Exactly. That's a big-ass liability. But it's 50-50. You don't pay before your haircut. You pay after. You put it up front.

You have to pay up front a little bit. That's to secure your spot. Exactly. So they don't know that you're wasting their time. Exactly. And that's only in some places. But you don't pay. If you walk into a Great Clips, you sit down.

First off, good morning to you. This is more your field because you got a haircut at the back of an Ulta. I got my haircut at an Ulta. If you walk into there, you get your haircut, then pay for it. Because if it's not what you asked for, you don't pay for it. If you go to a tattoo place. You have to put down money. That's to secure the spot.

Why don't you secure your spot at restaurants? Because you're already there. It's not a seven-hour thing that you're booking ahead of time. You can be at a restaurant as long as you want to. Sometimes you do. You do put down money at restaurants. If it's a nice restaurant. Where?

I've had to put down money. I've had to put a deposit. Oh, you're rich. Sometimes you do. You do put down money at restaurants if it's a nice restaurant. Where? I've had to put down money. I've had to put a deposit. Oh, you're rich. No, me and Olivia. All this little frugal Frankie act. Me and Olivia went to a nice restaurant, a five-star restaurant.

Wow. Five stars. Four-hour anniversary and I had to put a deposit because people of that high stature, when it's going to be that much money, they make you confirm your position. You are rich as shit.

Still didn't pay until the food came out. but that is strange to me it kind of is because you can always dine and dash always dine and dash i could i could get free meals for the rest of my life why is that if i that is i want to open a restaurant one day okay you are paying before my servers come and bring you your enchiladas right see but then what if you bring the shittiest enchiladas ever? You chose to come here. You're an evil business. You ate that, didn't you? The You Should Know Podcast.

This episode of the You Should Know Podcast is brought to you by our friends at BetterHelp. I say it all the time, and so does P. Comparison is the thief of joy. That's a fact. And it's easy to envy other people's lives. It might look like they have it all together on their Instagram, but in reality, they probably don't.

Facts. Therapy can help you focus on what you want instead of what others have so you can start living your best life. Therapy is very important. I'm a very big advocate for therapy. And I think, especially in the social media day and age, a lot of people compare their lives to others and they get real sad. And I don't like that.

But therapy is helpful for learning positive coping skills and how to set boundaries. It empowers you to be the best version of yourself. It isn't just for those who've experienced major trauma in their life. I think everybody needs a good brain exercise. And I think, would you agree, Pete? I think that's the biggest misconception that therapy is only for the sad, the people that are going through something. I think everyone can benefit from therapy. I agree.

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Visit BetterHelp.com slash YSK today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash YSK. Now on to the rest of the episode. If you had to eat my left leg or Ruby, just which would it be? We're talking about eating. I just had, I have thrown a curveball. 86 mile an hour curveball, bottom right corner. Hello. Strike two.

You're almost out. If you had to eat my left leg or you had to eat Ruby. Two survived. You have to do it. Your dog. My dog, Ruby. Your niece, Ruby. Why your left?

My right one's better. I'm right-handed. You want me to answer? Well, yeah. Well, tell me. If you had to eat my entire left leg or all of Ruby. Can I eat your middle leg? I don't have...

You ain't getting that, Emma. That's staying in the old construction belt. You have to eat my leg or eat Ruby. I don't know. I don't want your left leg. Eat... Okay, but are you eating my left leg or are you eating Ruby? Pick.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, you f***ing cannibal. Pick. I knew it. I knew it. You are a sick, sick individual. Why? You didn't question or anything. You just went along with it.

I'm the sicko that asks, hey, do you want to be a cannibal or eat your niece? Who's the sicko? You didn't once say, what for? Do I have to? Is there a get out of jail free card? You said, dog or leg. Give me the leg. You didn't once question it.

It is a Wednesday. That's the type of person you are. At 2 p.m. But you didn't try to negotiate. You accepted making me an amputee. Because my butthole clenched. Or you would have killed my dog. Honestly, I should have taken your dog.

She has about six months left. My dog has about eight years left. I saw a video of Ruby. My dog has eight years. Seven to eight years. You are wildly delusional about that dog. How old is Malcolm? 15.

15. Ruby's five. Five plus eight is 13. Malcolm has never seized once in his life or lost breath once in his life. She's a small breed. Her nasal isn't big enough. Malcolm's 5. 5 plus 8 is 13. Malcolm has never seized once in his life or lost breath once in his life. Okay, she's a small breed. Her nasal isn't big enough. Malcolm's knees never popped out.

She has luxating patellas. He's never... Okay, she never got stiff as a board. She never did. I've seen that net go. Oh, she was... Yeah, exactly. And I saw a video of Ruby literally yesterday, and her whole face looked gray.

She was tired. She looked like Mace Windu. You know what I mean? That's what your dog looked like. Oh, fuck. Oh, he's drooling a little bit. I love a good comparison. Mace Windu, she looked like a bald Samuel L wearing a robe.

Oh, my. No, that picture of her where she looks like a Saudi prince. Yes, it's so cute. Oh, my God. Honestly, Kim, can we talk about your dog? Let's talk about it a little bit. Your dog doesn't like you anymore. Dude, okay.

We came back from the Vegas and Phoenix trip. It was six days. We came back ruby acted like she didn't know me it hurt my soul yeah it lit she she stayed the night with ryan i took her off ryan's bed put her on the couch and he tried to play with her she went told me no ran back to ryan oh my god it's bad it was hurting my soul you know i'm gonna make you i'm gonna dig in a little bit i'm gonna take that knife and stick it in a little more. Because think about it. Dogs have no idea of time. They have no idea how time is.

So how long were we away for? Two weeks? Six days. Six days? I thought we were gone. You don't know time. How long were we gone? A month? It was a long way.

I have my suitcases on the stairs. I have my new clothes. They're there. We were gone for six. Expired popcorn. We were going for six days. We were going for six days. She could have thought that was two years, bro. Okay.

She could have. They have no idea what time is. I hate people like you. They never know when you're coming back. I literally hate people like you. You close that door, and she never knew you were coming back. She thought Papa left her. Okay, that's one that's not true.

How? Two, they completely understand time. Okay, that's one that's not true. How? Two, they completely understand time. Dogs know, oh, it's been an hour. Dogs know that? They don't have a Rolex to check, but they understand time. How? Because if they didn't,

why would they go to sleep at night? Because their body's on a clock. Exactly. I hate people like you. Because you force them that lifestyle. Nope. What, do I punch her in the face and knock her out, put her to bed?

Give her NyQuil? No, but since she was a little infant-ass dog, they look like an alien gulag character. You were like, hey, mom and dad are going to bed, and we're going to grab you and put you in the bed. And she's like, oh, they're asleep. And dogs sleep eight hours a day. They're naturally sleepy dogs. Oh, so they don't understand time, but they understand English. Mom and dad's going to tuck in.

No. Go get a warm bottle and suck on that nipple. No. They understand. I hate people like you. Oh, my God. You know, every time you leave your dog, because a dog year is seven years to human years, so when you're gone for one hour, it's really like seven hours.

No, I'm not even saying that. When you're gone for a day, it's like you're gone for a week for them. I'm not saying that. I'm saying they don't know what an hour is two hours a day. They don't know that. No shit. Okay, you keep arguing. Tell Ruby to be here at 3.30. Tell her. She's going to be like, okay, 3.30. She doesn't understand English. She understands time.

Dogs understand English more than they do time. No, they don't. Oh my, Cam, yes they do. They understand repetition and fluctuation of voice. Yes or no? Have we done that to Ruby? No, we haven't. Oh my God, we haven't gone minnesota you like skateboards loves minnesota she's never been she's never been on a skateboard she's never smelled you treat her like a prisoner you treat your dog like a goddamn prisoner not the cute fringy with a

helmet she can't get on a skateboard she's too crooked her legs aren't good she's eight years she has plenty of eight years her heart and vitals are good. Her legs are like that. Dogs do not understand English. I also hate people that say that. Dogs do not understand English. They understand repetition. I'm saying. If you called a treat, if you named a treat from the beginning of your dog's life, laminate.

Yes, I'll be like. You want to laminate? It doesn't matter what you're saying. That's not true. That's not true. So, okay, go to Ruby right now. Go to Ruby right now and say, laminate? And then go- And what is she going to do if I do that?

Listen, listen, listen. And then go say, treat? What is she going to do? Is she going to- Because we've programmed the dog. Exactly. She knows English. She doesn't know English.

If it's just repetition- That's my point. I can go laminate and hand her a treat. She hears laminate and gets a little chewy turkey bite 700 times in a row in her beginning years for the rest of her life. That's how learning words works, Cam. That's how you learn words. No. Understanding English is being able to read, put words together, form sentences.

You can't talk with Ruby. Ruby doesn't know your struggles, dog. She doesn't. You think you're connected. She's not a licensed therapist. She doesn't have a clipboard. How do you know it? She doesn't take notes and she doesn't wear connected. She's not a licensed therapist. She doesn't have a clipboard. How do you know it? She doesn't take notes and she doesn't wear glasses.

She's not helping you. She's your stress relief, but she's going like this. She's just sitting there, dog. How do you know what a bed is? Because I sleep on it. Okay, how'd you learn what a bed was? A bed? Yeah, how'd you learn it?

I know what it is because I can read bed and there's a definition. How'd you learn it? Because I slept on it. Because when can read bed and there's a definition. How'd you learn it? Because I slept on it. Because when you were young and your mom was like, how is this kid's head so goddamn big? And then she was like, hey, Cam, go to bed and showed you what a bed is. Exactly. So Ruby, you showed her treat and showed her what a treat is. If you went laminate to Ruby right now, she wouldn't know what that was.

But if you said treat to her, she wouldn't know what that was. if you said treat to what as a human that's english but as a human now that we're older right say my mom said go tomato go tomato go tomato and then i grow up and i realize the tomato is a red ball that doesn't taste good and that's a bed i'd go my mom's a lunatic my mom's a lunatic. My mom's a lunatic. I've been sleeping on fruits and veggies. That's what would happen. Okay? The dog, from the dog's first breath, if I said Wisconsin and handed her turkey, Wisconsin, and I handed her

a dog pup roni, she thinks the state of Wisconsin is a treat. She doesn't know English. Repetition, fluctuation points. You moron. Just because her frontal. She doesn't know English. Repetition, fluctuation. That's the same thing. Everybody learned. You moron.

Just because her frontal lobe doesn't develop to learn more later, they learn English. Oh my God, frontal lobes, all right? Dr. McDreamy, frontal lobes? You're kidding me. My dog can't even breathe right. And you're talking about her frontal lobe.

What's her SAT score next, huh? She's taking pre- next, huh? Huh? She's taking pre-AP next year? Who do you think your niece and my dog is? Who do you think she is? What is she, German three? That's why she doesn't trust you. That's why she doesn't love you anymore.

She loves me today. It took her 24 hours to reset. My dog doesn't know English. She's as dumb as a box of rocks. She's a loyal creature. That was funny. Dogs don't know time. No, they do know time. They don't know English. so you think they know time more than english bro yeah you're

you're an idiot dog if they don't know time if they're really oh this seven years shit what people say then why the dogs why i know that hurts i know that hurts i was saying. Why? That's not what I was saying. Why? You keep bringing up dogs. Why? Why do the dogs go to sleep? You broke the couch. That's not what I was saying. My core hurts. Look at my knuckles.

My moose knuckles out. Oh my god, you cut skin. You are a savage. Betterhelp.com. That is better. H-E-L-P slash YSK. Okay. The You Should Know Podcast.

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purchase. Please enjoy Heineken responsibly. Now on to the rest of the episode you should know podcast did i tell you i almost shit my pants ordering a cold brew at a duncan did i tell you about that what how'd you already have to shit before the coffee i almost shit my pants ordering a cold brew at a Dunkin' Donuts. Tell me the story. My wife wanted to try something new. That's dangerous.

She got very dangerous. She heard cold brews were more like, like more uppity than like a warm sugary drink. It is true. She goes, go in there and get me a cold brew. You said yes, ma'am. I'm like, yes, ma'am. Just kidding. I said, of course, ma'am.

Anything. So I go out. Nah. I get inside the Dunkin', right? I'm talking. I'm talking to like an old, not older lady. Like she's in her 40s. Does it matter?

She's in her 40s behind me, right? The whole time. Overwhelming urge to fart. The whole time. I'm being respectful. I was talking to someone. You already know. If I was on my phone, she'd be right behind me.

That shit all on her side. Him shitting the sound check, by the way. A lot of people were trying to help us. Right in front of a whole sound crew. I said, we have to have a meeting. They're like, hey. They said, hey, Trey, turn that mic. Everyone went.

I said, bro, come on. Yeah, anyway. It's a fart. It's human in nature. But back to the Dunkin'. Cold brew shit and pants. Yeah, sorry. So this whole time I have a fart.

And I turn around because there's like probably two people in front of us. And I'm just waiting in line. And I forgot what she did. She complimented me on something. It was either like the height. You know how moms are. The height. Screw you, you dog whisperer.

The height. She said some shit like that. So I turn around and start talking. Oh, you remind me of my whatever, you know, that shit. And the whole time I'm literally, I'm playing defense. Like I'm turtle shelling. Groundhog Day if I mess up. Good morning to you. Like I'm turtle shelling. Groundhog day, if I mess up.

Good morning to you. If I take one half lateral step. It's down your right calf. Oh, I was in shorts. It'd be on the floor. It'd literally be on the floor. So the whole time,

I'm sitting there. And then, you also know me. I like to mess with people a little bit, right? Yes. Say outlandish things

for no reason. Correct. Kind of make them think, is this a human being that I'm talking to? I kind of like messing with people. So I intentionally hit her with a nonsense statement. I went, yeah, this is my first time yesterday here as well. And she goes, I'm sorry, what?

And I said it again. I don't know what I was on. I don't know if I was tired or whatever. I said, yeah, this is my first time here yesterday as well, too. Nice. And she looks at me. Instead of the typical reaction of just like a smile or like whatever, she busts out laughing.

So at this point, I'm happy that she's like, she's enjoying it. The second I started to laugh, I literally went. And I went. And I literally, dog, I double-cheeked myself. I went, oh. And I grabbed my shit, standing right in front literally i was like this i said yeah i said yeah it was my first time yesterday too she goes i literally grabbed my shit that way y'all have a bathroom you have a bathroom then what you have

right here you need the key i said you're gonna have to unlock it for me i went in there i absolutely shit in that dunkin donuts came out got the cold brew wife didn't like it took two sips wasted seven dollars that's my story how do you did you go back out oh yeah is the lady still there no she's gone okay i made sure i took at least five minutes in there i said she cannot see me again i grabbed my own ass as if i was a model. That's how bad it was. It was close. I ain't like a little ass boy, bro. Dude, it was bad.

It was close. Oh, my God. That was a funny ass story, bro. No, it was bad. You need help with your rectum region. We need a sponsor that helps you close your sphincter. No, it's because, honestly, it's in the morning. When I wake up, it's like locked in.

It's like plunged up there. Oh, your booty goes loose off the way. It's like my internal workers clogged it. But it takes about two, two and a half hours. That's why normally we wake up, go to the gym. The second I come home, I'm hole is loose off the way. It's like my internal workers like clogged it. But it takes about two, two and a half hours. That's why normally we wake up, go to the gym. The second I come home, I'm just like loose. But this time we were going out and doing stuff with the wife. She wanted a cold brew.

It was about that two and a half hour mark. Would you say you have a strong sphincter or a loose sphincter? Oh, it's real strong until it's not. It's real strong until it's loose. Once it gets oiled up. It's like Fort Knox, but then when it opens, it's like those old wooden saloon doors gust of wind can just knock me wide open pigeon barks too loud in my ear i go what oh i'm just i'm done dog i am done yeah oh no yeah you ever tried a cold brew yeah a lot i used to drink them all the time you just take

those those starbucks espresso ones not not just those but like a real nit a cold brew? Yeah, a lot. I used to drink them all the time. You used to take those Starbucks espresso ones. Not just those, but like a real nitro cold brew from Starbucks. I never got that. Are you okay? You're doing some spell on me. Some witchcraft. It's a weird shit happened to me at a gas station. Not a gas station.

I'm stuck. No, no, no. Oh, no. No, no, no. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't. Please don't. You're absolutely crying. Yeah, so I was at a Chipotle, right? Uh-huh And so you go through

Alright, stop, bro Alright, I got you Be a professional No, I got you Deadass is a crazy story There's literally water on your face, but I got you Are tears water? I'm the unprofess

Yes I'm the unprofessional Oh,. I'm the unprofessional. Oh, don't believe that one too. Is that water too? Piss? It's diluted water. Semen? Semen's just,

you're letting a whole continent of kids out. You're just, go make your own world. It's like a, Have you ever thought about how tough that one son of a bitch is that makes it all the way?

We did that, didn't we? Golly. Or, what the hell do you mean we did that? What do is? We did that, didn't we? Golly. What the hell do you mean we did that? What do you mean we did that? We were the one. Oh. We were testing it, shooting in Petri dishes and shit.

Should we? Should we? Should we? No, like test testosterone. What? Don't you have to mute that word. In a cup and then you go get a test? Is that how testosterone is tested? Absolutely not.

Testosterone is just in your blood. Oh, then who was I sending that to? Somebody just has a village of meat. Oh, my God. I was wondering. I was like again I was like I'm running I'm running out over here y'all didn't even pay for the last one

imagine imagine say here in a couple years we're more of like a we're going like a global tour right oh my god what would you do

say we have a show in Finland yeah we're peeking we're looking at the crowd we pop out the whole first row looks like you there's 20 years just descendants Oh my God, what would you do? Say we have a show in Finland. We're peeking, we're looking at the crowd. We pop out, the whole first row looks like you. There's 20 years, just descendants of you. One's back is extra.

Oh shit. I just closed my eyes and the dark void was moving. Dude, I have a fear about my future kids if I ever have them. Probably not though. If I do, they're going to to they're either going to be really pretty or really i think they're gonna be beautiful okay but chipotle yeah sure so you know the chipotle by my house it's like you go through the line and then there's a and then it's you got to finish the line and this is where the silverware is the plastic wear and then back there's more seating yes like right by the silverware yes so i was going and i got my order right i was going to pick up a fork and there's like this table of four odd pairing though it was like like a 17 year old

boy like a 48 year old man and like a 75 year old woman and i said who's all here that's definitely grandma dad son until i heard what they said so the seven i swear to god this is a true story and i overheard it because i love eavesdropping i love knowing what other people's lives are like i shouldn't have eavesdropped on this one your hustling is honestly probably my top three thing so i was grabbing the fork put in the bag okay the boy was talking to the older lady and they were all very into the conversation right and none of them looked like each other we had like an asian we had a black guy like an old person white lady there was no fourth person you said table of four no it was a fourth table for four three people right old white woman asian guy black guy some there was all it was like a melting pot we're playing where's all this who

how'd y'all meet right and why is everybody so far from each other, right? Deal or no deal. And so, God bless you, take the case. The dealer's black. Did you know that? Dealer's black? No, but you had to make it up to make yourself feel involved. Because Howie Man does far from us.

I was going to say something. Come on. So I heard, as he was talking to the older lady, and he goes. The young one. The young gentleman was talking to the older the older lady and he goes the young one the young gentleman was talking to the lady he goes yeah and that's the last and then i never saw my mom again after that i swear to god on jesus christ that's what i heard and i never saw my mom again after that and he chuckled and i said so it's not a sad story but everybody else was very intrigued they took everything in me not to pull up that fourth seat and be like, tell that again.

You know what I mean? You can't say that in a Chipotle loud. I got time. That's the last. And I never saw my mom again. Yeah. Either he killed someone. Okay, my first question is, the middle gentleman,

the 40-year-old black guy, he knows it. He knows what's happening. No. Oh, in my mind? Oh, in your mind. He's yeah he knows it he knows what's happening no no oh in my mind oh in your mind okay part of it or he's already known yes he buried the body who's the old woman exactly doesn't know if he was talking to her and they didn't look like under like cops or like detectives you know what i mean they were like in it or something or one of them worked at carmax like a cava and they take the car off the convenient bill you know what i mean carvon i mean you know what i mean it's oh don't please don't please don't just kleenex kleenex kleenex oh my god no please cam oh my god i'm so sorry and you know the what i think about often after that how many murderers do you think we walk by every day? Dude.

Dude. Probably a good amount. Every day I'd go not too many, but in our lifetime, just think about that. How many just crack pipe fiends have we walked by? Well, that's normal. I was going down the line. How many homicide victims? Not a victim because they were spending a lot of time in cemeteries.

How many murderers? That's my original question was yeah i got back to it i went across the bases came back home uh that's a warm wet tissue big ass loogie yellowish green stop people eat during this anyway we'll stop it no but how let's talk about that for a second like don't you ever want to ask like how what if people had to wear a badge that i killed somebody you know when people do herbal life and they lose like 10 pounds and then they wear that badge like ask me how to lose weight yeah what if someone had to wear that hey i'm a killer you think people would treat them different yeah i think that's messed up no i think it is well i killed somebody out of self-defense or killed somebody in general if you self-defense

i'll treat you a little different but if you just straight edge just says But from outside looking in, you're immediately going to think the worst. See, the world's soft, bro. You got to treat people on what you know about them, on Jesus. Okay. I've been thinking that, bro. I really have. Why are you talking like that? You're talking like speed.

I have been thinking that, though, for a minute. Okay, but wouldn't it be like people shouldn't treat other people just because the way they look or because of i mean i know that's called racism but i'm saying like in this in this exact situation scenario based premise would you rather if a guy had i'm a killer on his chest you don't know if he killed someone because they stormed his house i don't want this whole family i don't want to i don't want to talk about it i would rather i was ready somebody be like i'm a therapist. That's soft, bro. Sorry, I'm not Nelson Mandela, brother.

What did he go to jail for again? I didn't know he went to jail for a long time. I thought that was Mahatma Gandhi. No. No, Gandhi lived a peaceful life. No, remember Nelson was in jail, he got out. He was in jail. Yeah.

What was it for? Not a clue. Tax evasion. No, you can't see. You're going to get canceled. How? You can't put tax evasion on a world leader that promoted peace. Did he promote peace, correct?

Yeah, I believe so. No, I was dead serious because I don't think, or no, wasn't it like. Can you, CJ, you got a phone, huh? Not like war crimes, but I think he was basically going against the government, trying to do the peace and everything. I don't know. Look it up real quick. That's pretty. What did Nelson Mandela go to jail for? It was an opposition to the South African Apartheid Regiment. Is that a

case? It was an opposition to the apartheid of the... I don't know what that means. You're saying such big words to me. Basically, South African wanted to do something. The South African was a government? Congress? Leaders? The Regiment of South Africa had an agenda. Nelson was going against it.

Because he wanted peace or something. Yep. So they said, go to jail. Go to jail. How long was... He got out before he died. He didn't die in jail. Huh?

27 years. Damn. Imagine going back 27 years later, you're still popping. Imagine being in jail for 27 years. Don't put it... Let's not get... Okay. Could you?

Man. No. That's my biggest fear is jail. My butt is too nice. Let's not get into it. But could you? Man. No. That's my biggest fear is jail. My butt is too nice. Let's just... Have you seen my butt? You have tiger stripes. Look at my butt.

You got an ass like Tyler. Like a skinny lower back and then it's just a little... You're going to get in trouble. What? You're going to get in trouble. No. You're going to get in trouble.

That's a pretty accurate representation because she's a very skinny woman. If you want to keep it, we can keep it. Yeah, go ahead. Tell me more about Tyler's. Love you, Liv. Anyway.

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That's 20% off your first order when you shop better hydration today and using promo code ysk at liquidiv.com now on to the rest of the episode you should know podcast okay think about that yes i think we're grown right i am no but like we were grown before we were incarcerated like i'm about to just listen imagine think about everything all the progression technology law the way the world works in our lifetime yeah from 98 for me 99 for you all the way till 2024 yeah imagine you were behind closed doors and you missed all of that for a good reason or think about what we just said it doesn't even matter i mean i'm just

saying in the scenario like we're in jail say we got convicted for something we didn't do regardless yeah oh god knucklewood yeah but i'm saying could you even like think about bro before you went to jail the cell phone was brand new and it was this big yeah it was big as hell you had to dial up on internet you get out of jail the first thing you see they release you with your little bag and your in your shitty little button-up shirt yeah the first thing you see is a guy talking to someone else in ireland through face yeah insane work that's what my favorite thing to do is rectangle with a glass screen you can see someone else's face in it there's compilations of that people getting out of jail for a long time and looking at new tech

new tech new technology it's it's very. Big box TV to there's movie theaters that serve you steak nachos while you're watching some guy named Thanos. The size of Oreos. Probably tripled. Well, yeah, that. How many new Oreos?

They have red velvet Oreos now. They do, but you're on an oddly specific... Why are you talking about Oreos? Whataburger has sweet and spicy bacon burgers now. You're talking about food so much like there's not real things

that happen. You know what I mean? Subway footlongs. Not $5 anymore. It's about $12. You know what I mean? Subway footlongs. Not $5 anymore. It's like $12.99. Okay. Cars. Real shit.

Cars. Now there's self-driving cars. There's Bluetooth in couches now. Are we in... You are fascinated with the little things. Bluetooth in general. Nuts behavior. Bluetooth in general.

How does Bluetooth work? How does a camera work?'m tired of you thank you i am tired this is one thing i was saying how the hell does someone point a little black box at me that says sony i watch it black box that says sony they go smile say cheese first off what what the hell why cheese because when you go cheese you go like like this. No, I don't. I go cheese. So, cheese. Yeah? This is where it's at.

This is my picture face. Cheese! Cheese! When you're doing this, it looks like a smile, though. Cheese! Yeah, see? Yeah, that's good. You? I want to show my kids this.

I'm not going to lie. I look like a feral beaver. Make that face again Just keep it in the camera. She ever casted for the movie it got penny wise wrong. Look at him. Yeah, Georgie anyway Let's just let's bust it open real quick. Hello Okay, that was a good one. Yes or no?

Are you a little chubbed up now? No, I got some unnecessary blood flow, but it was from you, not me. Cam, okay. No. No, no, no. Question, question, question. To hell with you. Please, please.

No, to hell with you. No, please. It's about a relationship. I'm going back to the camera afterwards. Okay, afterwards. Because I refuse to let that go. How well do you know me? 10 out of 10.

Okay. How well do you know? How well do you know? My right thigh was vibrating but my phone wasn't in my pocket no that's a thing it's a problem yeah because you you're it's like it's just like a sensory disorder yeah yeah okay how well do you know me 10 out of 10 how much do you know me in a loving like intimate way you how much you know what i like in a loving intimate way 10 out of 10 okay you can ask something that's going to have a digital footprint, my friend.

You need to be hella careful with what comes out of your mouth next. Oh my god, I almost had one of your fetishes. You don't know my fetishes. I don't know your fetishes. I don't have fetishes. I could literally draw the things you like and that

would be... Wait. draw the things you like and that would be wait mouth it to me i'm so sorry what you draw are you i don't know what you're talking about oh yeah i love that okay back to the question. But that's not weird. Okay. Sure. But. Okay. You know me on an intimate level what I like. All right. Describe. Please be careful.

Describe what you would take me on for my perfect first date. What I would take you on? Like if you were to take me on a first date, since you know me so well, what would you do for me? Is it an all day date or what's my time? Give me a time. Be reasonable. If it's a first date, it's not all day. Okay.

That's a bad question because you know I don't want to be around somebody that long exactly so so nighttime nighttime you know i'm awake in the night you know batman four hours nighttime four hours well it depends on how the rest of the night goes but but the original day so you don't know me see no it's already bad questions you don't know me saying if i if i'm taking you out i'm like hey we're gonna go blank i'll save that for the answer. We're going to be there at 7. Like, do we have a time limit? No. Just take me through the night.

Take me through the night. Oh, my God. I'm going to get. Okay. So first thing I do, right? Yeah. First thing I do is I try to shock the central nervous system by doing one of your tricks as well. I spray cologne.

I get ready, but then I put some on the palm of my hand. Don't tell them that. What? That's your trick. So now, immediately, off the shake, I go, hey, what's up, babe? How's it going? Oh, don't. Okay. Have a good night.

But immediately, you're thinking. Every time you move your hand close to your face, they're going to smell you. You're thinking, oh, my God, he's on the same wavelength as me. I love him already. So, boom. Where are we at seven? Yeah, tell me. Steakhousehouse let me break it down okay okay steakhouse yeah because i clearly see your pictures and there's no way you're a sober individual so i take you to a steakhouse and i immediately order four smoked double old fashions

three for you one for me you're trying to get nasty. Hey, hello to you. You're a good looking non-sober individual. Here we go. I'm just kidding. It's two and two, of course. We both drink one before the meal comes out. Meal comes out, I clearly know you're not going to eat a whole thing, so I only order you an eight ounce steak. Okay.

I, myself, the raccoon, I get a 16 ounce. It's a little turn off. Because I'm a... No, because depending on how the night goes, you're going to blow up my bathroom. I'll blow it up downstairs and then come up and blow you... Did I say that out loud? Did that leave my thoughts? Okay, let's start over.

So we're at the steakhouse. Steakhouse. Two smoked old fashions. What sides? Knowing me, what sides? Knowing you. Let me get that garlic mash. Okay.

I like a little mash. Garlic mash. Yeah, what else? My boy doesn't like pasta, so we're not getting mac and cheese. My boy's afraid of asparagus, so we're not getting that. It smells a little weird. It smells a little weird. So we're going to go garlic mash.

Yeah, give me that garlic mash. Depending on the night. Come on, man. Maybe like a truffle fry. No. I hate truffle fries Lie again in front of God I didn't eat them Whenever we had the steakhouse in Vegas

Did I eat those truffle fries CJ? Thank you How does CJ know he's better than you? He doesn't He was sitting right next to you What would your other side be? Some kind of vegetable Some kind of steamed vegetable

Yeah but you don't like anything healthy Yeah I do I love vegetables I love vegetables You love vegetables? I love vegetables. You love vegetables? I love vegetables. I literally shit in the same bathtub as my brother. I shit out corn.

That's how much I love vegetables. We already talked about that. So? Corn's a meal product. Did we? No, it's declared as a vegetable. Yeah. Back to the date.

Okay, take me. We're going to get a steak, right? Yeah, yeah. So, boom. The meal's done in about 45 minutes but we're not leaving i want to get to know your intricacies i want to see your douche so we're sitting there talking right yeah great conversation i've pre-prepped questions but all my answers are organic okay but i have certain questions i really want to ask get to

your core talking's done we leave okay where are we going here's where it gets spicy how are we traveling here's where it gets spicy uber black we traveling? Here's where it gets spicy. Uber Black. Okay, cool. Uber Black Steakhouse, and now we leave. This is where it gets spicy. So the place I took you is in a very affluent area that has shopping centers. Love shopping centers. So now we're walking, strolling. You like a good walk.

I can take a good walk. Depends where we're going. With a sexy, broad-eyed guy, you like a good walk. I'm in heels. I got a nice, tight sundress on. It's about 84 degrees, and my hair's slicked back. Okay? Exactly.

There we go. I know, Bubba. So we're walking through. Now, I intentionally sprained my ankle. Okay? Hear me out. I fake it. It doesn't really hurt, so now I have to put myself on you.

Oh, no. I hate that shit. Oh, you love it, though. No, I hate having to care for people that I don't know. Because then you get a little grab of downstairs. I don't do that. And your world is wicked. Oh, no, I hate that shit. Oh, you'd love it, though. No, I hate having to care for people that I don't know. Because then you get a little grab of downstairs. I don't do that. And your world is wicked. No, no, no.

If you get hurt in front of me, I'll be like, mm-mm. Like, if we're not comfortable with each other and you get hurt in front of me, it's immediately like, I don't like that. I don't like that. Okay, I lied. Ankle's fine. So we're walking, okay? Now, where I take you, it's not Louis Vuitton. Okay.

It's not Burberry. Okay. Definitely not Gucci. No, don't like that. Now, where I take you, it's not Louis Vuitton. It's not Burberry. Definitely not Gucci. No, don't like that. It is a vintage resale shop. Streetwear apparel. Nice. Cool comic books, bare bricks, stuff like that. Like art pieces, like art.

Vintage clothes, stuff like that. We go in. We don't buy anything. It's simply to look, separate from ourself. We keep making eye contact. We realize that we miss each other. It's the end of the date. Here we go.

We walk out. A couple more, maybe like 10 more minutes of intimate conversation before we get in the Uber. I say, hey, I got the Uber. This is your address, right? But I tricked you. We're not going to your house. We're going to my storage unit where I split you open and eat your insides. Because I am a serial killer.

That drink you had, it was formaldehyde. You're down in 20 minutes. Let's go. Oh, I thought the ankle would get you. Because if you would have let me follow through with the ankle, I split the ankle. I go to lean on you as you go to hold me for mel to hide right there right to the nose you're down in the street uber black my boyfriend passed out get him in the truck straight to the storage unit you scare me sometimes nah you could be i am no i wouldn't be surprised if

there's a newspaper that came out and been like the zodiac killer and there was a even though it was happening before we were alive no all serious note on a serious note if i'm not a killer right just a cute broad cute tall stallion we do get back in that uber i don't surprise you we go back to the house but then i give you a very good decision i do the old jingle of the keys i go inside hey is my hoodie still here it's a good move grab the hoodie yeah as i'm about to walk down your staircase i have to move your suitcase of course because it's right there so i move all your shit i move your shoes your luggage i move all your trash there's so there's so many bags of fast food i rummage through it all right i move it now i have a clear walkway yeah and as i'm about to walk down your

stairs hey i had a really good time tonight. It was really fun. Oh, thank you. I did too. You did too? Yeah. Would you like want to do this again or something? Yeah, I'd love to.

Well, let's set something else. I don't have anywhere to be right now. Let's set something up. Yeah. You want to sit down? Yeah, but I was thinking my lower back really hurts because I have an ass and I am tall. No, you're too needy.

Mute the bitch. Wow. My lower back kind of hurts because these heels all night. Do you mind if we just go to the bed? Probably shouldn't. What? Well, instead of sitting on your disgusting couch

with ramen and stains. So you want to get into my bed with all day on you? No, I mean... Were you born in a barn? I just wanted to sit on the bed. You look like you smell like yellow. Sir, you're being rude it's you though right no oh you're being so mean to me i had a great time you know what i was saying i smell like colors your house is filthy you know what i do if i

say you on a date what food food food food food you'd win the key to my heart I'd be like red lobster olive garden Texas roadhouse steakhouse I'd get crab legs 16 ounce steak

mac and cheese finish it with some ice cream give me those cinnamon butter rolls that was great that's what I would do let's uh back to the camera oh

how does that shit work? This is a great question. You and me are sitting on a couch. Someone holds a rectangle up to us, says smile. You go like this button and it's there forever. The shit snaps. And now it's, it's literally caught in time as if someone painted it. What's taking the picture?

That's like, it's just like a telescope with a button saying what is grabbing that image and then making it digital? I don't get that. I haven't genuinely looked, so I don't know the actual answer, but I think that the snap and the flash. See, but then it's all discredited when there's not a flash. But I think the flash, I think it's so hot. The flash is light.

But there's an internal one when you click the button. Is that a fact? Because I think. No, it's not. See, but that thing bothers me in itself how are you looking through a square and you see me i don't like that what is no it's just a telescope it's basically going like this exactly but how does this turn into a memory that lasts forever so look imagine you're looking through the telescope and you can see it correct yes

there's then a bulb or something that it goes so quick no it's frozen there because of the heat and it puts it on the canvas but there's no canvas i doubt there's a little card it's called a chip and you put it in and it can hold 10 000 pictures isn't that and it can record how does the recording work where are we that shit honestly bothers me i need to look up whoever video. Whoever invented the camera, like a recording, deserves like... That's probably one of the best inventions. They have a suite in heaven. They have a presidential penthouse in heaven. Golden crib.

Let's talk to... Let's save some relationships. Please, God, because you're about to start a war. Let's go. Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P

Dr. P Dr. P Dr. Say it. I go second. I get second. In your voice. There was a fly. I am second. Because you're trash. I'm trash. And I don't show up at Neiman. Here we go. Hey, Dr. P. Hello. My husband and I have been married 13 years.

Yeah. Together for 15 total. We're high school sweethearts. Oh, that's dope. We play video games together and we'll be in parties talking. And then he will tell me, one sec, and go on mute. I can hear him in the other room on the phone with a female friend of his,

and they will talk for 30 minutes plus at a single time. I feel like I'm slowly losing my husband and best friend, and it's breaking my heart. What do I do? Am I overthinking things here? Oh, this is a good one. I'm not going to lie. This is a good...

Is it your turn? No, it's never. Never. Never. Say sorry to the doctor. I'm so sorry, doctor. Doctor who? P.

Say it fully. The best doctor. I'm so sorry, Dr. P. The best doctor in the world, Dr. P. Wow. Let's... This is... First of all, that guy...

That guy's sick. The husband's sick for muting. In the same house? Muting up your mic to answer a FaceTime from another female in the same house as your wife? Oh my God, what if his door was locked too? Wait, why are they playing video games like that? Why are they not in the same, that's weird. They have two game rooms?

Yeah. They have one game room and her shit's set up next to a bedside? That's a big house. That's a strange arrangement. Okay. She... So she's giving us... Let me break...

Let me give you all the details. Oh, wait. Hold on. Before I lose your thought. Okay, go. She doesn't want to know. She doesn't. Because she knows.

She certainly doesn't. Because to be in the same house... Her poor heart. To be in the same house, to know he's muting up the mic to talk to another girl and you haven't planted some kind of recording device or gone in there and you can hear it's a female yeah to not go in there whenever that's happening for 30 minutes you just don't want to know you know what's happening two separate rooms yeah playing games together yeah it's mike at least half an hour on the phone with the female, but she hasn't approached him, hasn't brought it up,

but she comes to the best love doctor. What is she doing for that 30 minutes? Like, she's sitting in the lobby? Oh, no, she's definitely still playing search, 100%. Not if she can hear that. Oh, she's playing search. She's dying, but she's playing search. She's not a good Katie on that one.

This is what I'll say, man. You stack up your evidence. I hope they don't watch this together. If you watch this together, hey, bro, just come out and tell her. You're kissing the hell out of that secondary woman. You're a sicko. Yeah. Just put it out.

Ask your wife if she can join the relationship. If not, you're done. Because that's what you want. You're a sick bastard. Yeah. But this is what I tell her. If he doesn't watch his podcast or listen to it you have to start doing your investigative research man keeping receipts i'm not folders

you can start should i start semi crazy and then go all the way crazy or start all the way crazy go down start semi and build up okay semi crazy he mutes up right next time he mutes up you should walk to that door just go to that door you Put your ear on the door. Get that old classic 1980, listen. See what you can get. Secondary option. Put that AirPod in the room. Put that on walkie-talkie mode. Put it on walkie-talkie mode.

You listen. Secondary option. Third, Nest camera. Go buy a whole camera, put it in a Chewbacca, set it on that desk. Fourth option, because you already know there's some funny business going around. Go to your, what carrier do you have? Verizon? AT&T?

T-Mobile? Y'all are married. Y'all are under the same plan. You have passwords. You have access. Go to that AT&T. Go check that bill. Go to that T-Mobile.

Go check that outgoing call list. Can I print this out? Can you print that out for me? I've done this in real life well I haven't done it but my friend whose husband was cheating on her oh god

I gave that advice she found a lot go up to that go up to that T-Mobile if that's not illegal I don't know if it's illegal if it is illegal I didn't tell anybody

to do anything it's a comedy podcast 100% you go get that call log you have all this evidence you have you have your ear you have your walkie talk. You have your ear.

You have your walkie-talkie. You have your Nest camera. You have your printed out receipts. Then you go up to that husband and be like, go play COD with her, bitch. Get your stuff out of my house. Go join the... Because this relationship's in the gulag. There you go. That's a great reference.

What if she doesn't own the house? What if it's his house? You better your shit find a motel go stay with dr p because dr p would never do it to you dr p knows how to treat you right so for final synopsis you need about 250 you need a quick trip up to verizon and you can get your shit done honestly or if you want to be if you want to be serious just best buy has good deals just talk to him be like hey who is like that's kind of crazy like if you can't even

talk to your husband about this because you know and you don't want to know it's probably not the best I'd say yeah on the respectful approach

don't don't swat down the door and bust in and say I got you I'd say you straight up bring it up he's going to lie woman to man

but let him lie because that's even worse come on because if he lies but she can't prove the lie but i'm saying that's why you get the evidence first and then you but but it's why are you lying how do you know she can't prove he's lying though i hear a female voice i don't know who did what if it's the simplest who you're on the phone with he goes oh it's jim but she literally hears a

what if he's not that bad of a liar he's like oh it's it's his female best friend like he's oh that's my best friend i don't know your female best friend who is she probably does because they've been together for 15 years it's a female best friend probably does and so she'll be like why are you tripping she's like yeah she can just gaslight her into it you get you have to get that evidence you have to get or his dad yeah and that was Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- episode 120 we absolutely love y'all thank you so much for coming phoenix in vegas full recap is on patreon right now god bless god bless out here all the funnies all the crazy behind the scenes god bless god bless all the gambling talk as well uh that's on patreon right now everything else you need to know is linked in the description below patreon facebook twitch

discord everything's down there. We love you. We love all of our people on all of our platforms, and we cannot wait to see you next week in 121. Houston, three days away, last show. It is up to y'all to send us into a vacation and into a year of rest on a great, fantastic note and to end this first tour once and for all

on the highest of notes. Houston, it is literally in your hands. We cannot wait to see you in three days. We're so excited. Can't wait to see your beautiful faces. I want you on your feet and screaming on the intro. I want the flashlights up. I want the screams.

I want all of you to record videos. I want you to tag us and everything. It's going to be a blast. It's going to be crazy. But until Thursday, get your good karma, confuse the casuals with this week's secret code. Real good. L-P-E-T.

L-P-E-T. L-P-E-T. L-P-E-T. L-P-E-T. L-P-E-T. L-P-E-T. I'll give you extra toast. No, I'll give you a hint.

It was very recent. Something we just talked about. Oh, let's play each other's toys. Let Pac-Man eat that. Oh, let Pac-Man eat that, baby. Let Pac-Man eat that thing. You know what I'm saying? Good morning to you.

LPET. Confuse the casuals. Leave it in all the comments on every single platform. We absolutely love you. Episode 121 will be next week. And remember, one out of ten qualifiers don't make it home to Christmas. And we will see you next time. Hello?

No, yeah. Houston's on three days.