You Should Know Podcast - MY SECRET GIRLFRIEND! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: October 16, 2023

LIVE SHOW TICKETS (NYC): https://concerts.livenation.com/event/00005F2821CDAF2F?utm_source=IG_Venue&utm_medium=OrganicSocial&utm_campaign=MOB_LN_Gramercy&utm_term=OnSale_YouShouldKnow&linkId=100000218381771&fbclid=PAAabBzMEOA4YfiEjHz3ocAu4HB4EsBM49AuXqFH9WD59-1kl0PnJCcNBZ_Dg_aem_Af_rYCWdVTKJ5Kfn6cHSVdr1aaLVp6iogD3VkU4BcWAH4q25x9ARpoXsEsuphQMehSE PATREON AVAILABLE NOW: https://www.patreon.com/YouShouldKnowPodcast NAOMI (Merch Designer) : https://linktr.ee/xenagriffin?fbclid=PAAabJMosNTP1iXrU95jMJxoeAfVSs_lq36Jwpu16dii4xb1EiaB1uLtcKyuQ_aem_Af_R682HMd57KjpVvxYxG8GsaRr6IQEk7KGRCtOa9I2Y5D0VPuD9xFGWhbWeWtwpTeU Peyton’s Polaroids: https://instagram.com/peytonpolaroids?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== TRUE VAULT ESCAPADES: https://youtube.com/@AtomicWolf54 0:00 Special Thank you 2:37 CAM JOINS 5:25 Mama Livs Surprise 8:42 Peyton’s College Lifestyle 13:30 Peyton HATES Cam 17:56 Harry’s 19:40 INSANE Random Injuries 23:53 Peyton Talks Backwards 27:27 Buying a Monkey 29:19 PEEING IN THE CAR 33:10 WORST DAY EVER STORY (INSANE) 49:06 Crying To Drake 50:49 Black Mamba vs Turtle DEBATE 58:55 DR.P (HIS SECRET GIRLFRIEND) 1:05:39 POP CULTURE (LOGAN PAUL VS DILLON DANNIS) 1:08:26 ANNOUNCEMENTS TODAYS SPONSORS: HARRYS: Harry’s.com/YSK FOR $3 STARTER PACK! YouShouldKnow P.O. BOX 191564 2825 Oak Lawn Ave Dallas, Texas 75219 FOLLOW PEYTON: https://instagram.com/psh8?igshid=ZDg1NjBiNjg= JOIN THE DISCORD: https://discord.gg/V5WYhSte2R GRAB SOME MERCH: https://www.youshouldknowstudios.com/shop Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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The You Should Know Podcast. The You Should Know Podcast. It's the best day on earth. It's the You Should Know Podcast. How about a day we're mere days away from the live show. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast. Episode 82. Round. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast, episode 82.

Round of applause, please. There we go. Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast, episode 82. It feels so good to be back. If you are new here, if you haven't already,

you can look below. You can see that subscribe button. Is it pressed? You're wrong. If you give it more below, that haven't already, look below. You see that subscribe button? Is it pressed? You're wrong. If you give it more below, that's in the comment section. Is it fulfilled with your name? Guess what? Even more wrong. Go and fill that out.

Get your good what? Karma. I want to take this intro to say we are a few days away from our live show in New York. It's sold out. Pretty much there's one ticket left, but by the time this gets up, it'll be sold out. But what I want to do this intro is a little bit different. I want to say thank you to some people behind the scenes that really keep the Ushino Podcast community and family together and give us a great place to all have a discourse. And it's in the Discord. Oh! Come on, he can rap too. I want to shout out to the admin and the mods

of the usual podcast discord because they work overtime they're always in they're helping people out creating a great family bond and we appreciate you and we love you so i want to shout out to the admin piranha who puts on the watch party every monday in the discord and live streams the watch party for everybody round of of applause for Piranha one time. Shout out to Piranha. I also want to shout out to the mods, Brooke, Jaleesa, Katie, and Ray. Round of applause for our mods. Also, there's a guy named Ryan in the Discord

who did something really cool in the watch party last week. That's why you got to be in the Discord and you got to be a part of the watch party. He gave away two tickets. He bought tickets to the live show, gave them away to two people in the Discord. So we cannot wait to see y'all. Shout out to Ryan.

We love you. Thank you so much to everybody in the Discord, everybody in the You Should Know Podcast family who subscribes, drops a comment every video, is following us on all platforms, participates in the merch, participates in sharing this with your friends. We love you.

This ship does not row without you. We love you. Now on to the rest of the episode. Whoa, wait a minute. We got, come on, hippie. We got co-host Cam, a.k.a. Hippie, back in the studio. That really hurt my digits. Bottle girl service.

Here we go. Ready? You'd be a great bottle girl. Yeah, yeah. You're two for two on the s, on the sass this week. I got a good little sass vibe I can always channel. You never channel it when you're with me when I want it to be channeled. Because things can happen.

You know. It's, we're about 13 seconds in. Do you know, I've been having real bad algae right now. Real bad algae. Real bad algae. Allergies. Al algae. Allergies. Algae. Allergy.

You're a gassy bastard. Have you gotten that checked? You maybe need a bypass. I need better gut health. You need a bypass. But your guts are so bad. Depends on who you ask. Your gut health is so bad that like you've,

you've gone past the radar of badness to where it's like when things should harm you, it's just normal now. Like you've created a different biome in your own, in your, does that make you feel good? It makes me feel horrible. No,

does it make you feel good to say that thing? Those things about me? No, it was cause I want to bring it to the top of your mind. In private, in private, bring it up to you so you can know that. In private,

you're, I thought there was a human, right? But gotta move i thought in private you're so nice to me you flirt you hold hands and then here you're just like i'm the scum of the earth like people the fans that meet us in person they're like oh he actually is in love with peyton you did not just say that we flirt no you flirt no i don. There's so much space from your sofa to the back of the wall. There is so... Like, someone could be doing push-ups right there. What is that?

Oh, my God. It's an extension cord. That was a bloody blade. No, your wife's nail is still behind the couch back there. Yeah. It's like an ombre coffin style nail. I know. How was your week, bubba?

You know, I'll bring... I will do better. You told me I've had bad energy on the week question i got you okay my week was does it ever drive you crazy just how has the night what the hell was that why would you you do that? I was becoming vulnerable. I was about to give you a 10 out of 10 weak answer. And you said, Does it hurt?

Are you crazy? How has the night? I don't know the song. Kim, what are you listening to? Sing along and drop them drawers. Baby, drop them drawers and And turn them nuts down low. We're going to get copywritten. CJ, you might have to cut some of that. I don't know.

Yeah, just do whatever you have to do. CJ, figure it out. How was your week? My week was fantastic. Tell me about it. It was really fun because I got to surprise my bestest friend in the world, my wife. You didn't surprise me. My other, yeah, my wife.

I'm sorry. Did that cut deep? I just don't think it's honest. I got to surprise my bestest female friend in the world, my wife. You don't know what I got downstairs. Okay. Whoa! Cut that, CJ.

Yeah, keep it. No, cut it. I got to surprise Olivia. You've known for months, but she had no clue. Basically, long story short, Liv thought me and her were going on this surprise magical vacation for like two months now oh cuddles and kisses she was like I can't wait to snuggle over a pumpkin spice latte with suits in the background of a Netflix series so the exact same thing we do yeah the exact literal exact same thing but little did she know she was missing a home and she doesn't get to see the people that she used to see a lot all the time so i orchestrated

an event where her uh two best friends key and bria came down and her sister shakayla came down and surprised live last night uh she was moved to almost tears i believe she was just too tired to cry and she did the cry face and she was just like. I was like. You're like, oh, something went wrong. Oh, my God. She doesn't like this. I was like, is she breathing? Is she having a stroke?

She was like. I was like, oh, I don't like that. I was like, don't be too mad. Yeah. But it was a fantastic week. Basically, just building up anticipation to that. I got to play some basketball as well. That's always fun.

Boring. That's not boring. I enjoy it. I got to play basketball as well as a That's always fun. Boring. That's not boring. I enjoy it. I got to play basketball as well as a favorite hobby of mine. It's fun. I also knitted some sweaters. I also learned. I didn't knit sweaters. Hey, what'd you do besides sweat?

I actually had a shit week. Yeah. Oh, did you? Oh, my. Are we getting right into our saving? No, no, no. We got to wait a little bit. There's a story, right? Oh, my God are we getting right into our saving? No, no, we got to wait a little bit. There's a story, right?

Oh, my God. Y'all – I've told thousands of stories on this podcast. This is upper echelon. I have one of the worst stories ever. I don't know if it's Rushmore. It might be Rushmore. It might be top four.

Like, my mood hasn't gotten back up. We can't keep talking about it. We got to wait. Okay. But all is well. Hell of a week. I got gotta surprise my wife i feel good about it she's having a great time it's chicago by the way is where she's going or she's already back she's back yeah that's you can say yeah she's already back but that's where she went

i've never been to chicago i neither have i and but she didn't even know until the day of flying yeah well actually the night before is when i told her and she was so surprised then she turned the corner and she saw her friends and sister, and she was like, what? And I was like, what made you pick Chicago? Basically, I put them in a group text, and I was like, hey, where do y'all think Liv would want to go? Where do y'all want to go? Because as much as it obviously, like, I did it because it's my wife, but it's like there's three other people coming, too. So I want them to have a great time, too.

So there was just a list of a couple different locations and i pretty much just like that one was there a coupon in chicago this weekend like half off no i think there's a 25 surplus of this weekend in chicago but it's all right pockets can recoup it's like muscles they break down and they grow back up so yeah i'm gonna need some time to recoup i'm literally keep thinking about that story you will not want to miss it that's all i'm gonna say but but soon but i have i i think i'm having a crisis inside i think i'm finally realizing that i am a dirty human being like i am gross thank you like i live like i'm still in college step one no oh my god do you but step one is is admittance and you have to bring it to you it can't be internal you have to put it out in the world no i've done that you've said that but i

don't think i'm gonna fix it because it takes effort and strength and i don't have either though so um you're such a no you live like you're still 18 years old i know it's bad it is sickening i went to payton's apartment the other day and when when I tell you, it's truly mind-blowing. It's unbelievable. There's no way on earth a 24-year-old man should be living how you do. Tell them what I do. Okay, what do I do? I know something that I do.

First thing, I've said this maybe a million times. Here's a million and one. When you walk in, it's a damn tornado. There's pants on walls. I'm like, how is that even sticking? His seats are filled with things that i've never seen before he has he has a shopping bag it's like how do you buy something and then just set it down on the floor and you don't open it you're it's like what are you waiting for no i have shopping bags from like december though yeah they're just sitting there in a corner crumbs everywhere still it's ridiculous shoes are all

over the place it okay they've heard all that before it is literally like he walks in and he just he just throws everything everywhere it's disgusting but this specific trip this man okay i want i want you to think about what i'm about to say now this is a new low for me this man drank two two liters of diet coke in his bed by himself in one sitting yeah that is that is a grow like that is a disgusting amount of liquid yeah especially carbonated soda four liters of coke is that a gallon is a diet coke i don't know is that that's not that's i didn't learn that in math that's a lot of that's a lot of diet coke i don't care if Coke. I don't care what it is. That's a shit ton of Diet Coke. Yeah.

Four liters of Diet Coke. And then. So then I grill his ass for that for half an hour. So then he gets out of the bed. First off, who does it? Like I've been in his apartment for half an hour and he's still under his covers. Yeah. Like show some damn respect.

You don't make me move, Bubba. Get up. You don't make me move. I am in your 300 foot square. Yeah, so stand up so we can stand next to each other? Exactly. I'm not like, get up out of your bed. That's disrespectful. Anyway, when he gets up, he's only in his boxers. I said, it's four in the afternoon. Hey, look, Dracula, put some clothes on. What'd you just say, huh? So we then go to the kitchen and I swear to God, strike me down right now let me die

if i'm lying this man we go in there there's a bag of goldfish and i go oh because it looks it looks like there's substance in it but it's facing away from me i go oh let me get some of those goldfish don't touch that why oh you're gonna beat my ass if i eat your goldfish? He goes, no, that's a bag of my fingernails. And I literally, I walked out of the apartment, damn near took a lap, and then came back. He had a sack of goldfish that was a fingernail obituary. He said, it was all 10. 10 fingernails in a sack of goldfish. Whose fault is it? It's my brain.

I can't help it. You are your brain. No, I'm not. Yes, you are. I'm working against it every day. No, you're fighting for your life. We're like this. It's literally pushing.

It's a pulley system in there. So basically what happens is I get in these modes where I get stuck. What does that mean though? So like I can't move. It's either a little too nippy outside and I want my manhood to be healthy. And I hate when my nipples resemble glass. And so I hate that. I really hate it.

And my hair when I wake up is like this. And I can literally feel the cold go through here and it's like a little ice in there. I hate it. I'm being dead ass serious. It irritates me. So I get in these modes where I'm stuck in the bed. Your hair, bro. But I got so stuck that other night.

But I was like, I'm dying of thirst. And I ordered two pizzas. And my normal routine when I order pizzas, order a two-liter Diet Coke. But this time I ordered two pizzas. So I can't go against God. So I had to get another two-liter of Diet Coke. Is this what I had to do? Save it.

I got really thirsty. And so I was sitting in bed. I watched a movie. I killed one. Then I was like, I got my friend's Prime Video login, and they have new movies on there. And they had the Elvis movie. And the folks wanted to see that. So they put on the Elvis movie.

And I was like, it's time for a second Diet Coke. You're not saying anything that gives you the ground to drink four liters of Diet Coke. Well, I got thirsty. If you'd have said, hey, I went downstairs went downstairs ran a half marathon and then i put on a 80 pound vest and went up all seven flights no i got dry mouth because it was cold my mouth you're inside yeah i don't know you don't live in a tent i don't know to work my thermostat you know my thermostat is old your thermostat is old but it's so simple you go no no mine doesn't do that tell That's what I hate about you. I hate things about you.

Oh, you hate that about you. Oh, do I hate things about you? Because you think you're the king of the universe, and you're not. You don't know shit. How do you work my thermostat, Cam? Tell me. I guess I'm wrong. How do you work it?

I don't know. Dude, it's a problem. Bro, it's a thermostat. You're not going to make me... It's a thermostat. You're not going to make me feel little. You're 24. You're 24. You are little.

You're this big. You're that big. You're 24. Figure it out. How big am I? That big. What I'm saying is I got thirsty. Stop questioning me.

I'm trying to be vulnerable. Learn how to use it. Is L in the word vulnerable? Vulnerable? Vulnerable. Because some people say vulnerable. Anyway, who cares? It is. It should be. You don't know shit. I'm better at English. No, you're not. Vulnerable vulnerable vulnerable because some people say vulnerable Anyway, who cares it is it should be you don't know shit. I'm better than you know, yeah, so

Say no, no, you never got a word of excellence. You never got That's cuz other stuff has to go into that. Okay, I'm okay. You never got an Honor Society Award for English I didn't want one if I would have won one either my natural talent I Ain't know a thing until they literally knocked down my door with a fucking balloon oh they saw a balloon explain that a balloon knocked down your door no they knocked down my door with a balloon with a balloon they opened they punctured your door with the balloon oh here we go week two with a balloon explain it cam's listening comprehension skills are that of an idiot.

They... Shut up! They knocked down my door with a balloon. It's what you said. Hey, when this is moving, this ain't working, dog. So shut your mouth. They knocked down my door. Period.

With a balloon. Two sentences. you didn't say like that and you know you didn't rewind the tape you said they knocked down my door with a balloon they knocked down they knocked down we're definitely in two different head spaces they they knocked down my door is with the balloon so two sentences is with a balloon a correct sentence yes that's not with the balloon you english fucking wizard is a sentence okay i didn't mean to oh i didn't mean a period so it's not oh you did oh so you're not the best no it's because you pissed me off so you you you confused the period for what i'm about to confuse my fist with a and blow your top off oh what do you know english boy doesn't english right be careful with that word

yeah anyway can i tell my you do this i don't even know what i was talking about okay don't touch me i don't know what I was talking about. Hey, it's your show, doggo. I saw the sadness in your face. You literally went from anime to anime. Dude, I'm fucking done. I'm so done. I don't even know what I was talking about. I don't mean to make- Oh my god, shut up.

I'm literally gonna put you on a 35 second goddamn time out to shut your fucking mouth. Shut up. Shut up. Golly. time out to shut your mouth shut up shut up so the reason I put my fingernails in the goldfish because I was stuck and so I go this thing right wherever my fingernails are too long and I haven't gotten them what's the problem dog this sucks you said my fingernails are too that's a fucking that's a bowie knife hey just because i'm interesting and paying graphics for the viewers okay so my fingernails are too long and i notice

it i'll start with one that's the longest i'll be like okay let me take care of that put it in put in the goldfish bag but then my brain brain starts to, like, I get panicked. And I'm like, I have to do all of them. And so then I ended up with a sack of nails. But, okay, that's fine. I didn't get time to take it out. You have ultimate time. I couldn't.

All the time in the world. That's the thing. I was stuck. Listen to the story, dog. Don't hit me that hard Something's not right with this shoulder He hyperextended his arm And tore my quad

Okay Fuck you Fuck your nails This episode is brought to you by Harry's You know Uncle Uncle P? Oh, hello. There's just subscriptions for everything nowadays. There is indeed.

There truly is. And some of them are just a bit much. Yeah. I am a personal believer. You need subscriptions for things that are everyday necessities. Subscriptions of value. I mean, they really only make sense if it's something that you use all the time, the same cadence, you know, like razor blades.

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at harrys.com slash YSK. That's harrys.com slash YSK for a $3 trial set. Now up to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. Bro, we were in the mall, right? We were in the mall. We met several of y'all fans, took pictures, fantastic. So we're going in and looking for coats, starting to get a little nippy, you know?

He said he doesn't like glass nipples, so he needs another layer. So we go into a store, tries on this this jacket and it looks so good on him so he's feeling himself we're sitting here looking for a mirror no mirror inside we finally find one I'm sorry. You're not allowed. You're not allowed to have beverages anymore, bro. You're not. What the fuck?

That's two weeks in a row tell us throw up we're just listening to me you just go yo like you actually there's so much shit that you left your mouth oh my god oh we both have teary eyes what were you saying god oh my god so he gets the jacket on we finally find the mirror don't drink again like a drink on your own time don't drink when i speak so he okay yeah okay no just shut your mouth do not touch that drink if i'm speaking i'm scared of it now so he he gets the jacket on and we finally find a mirror and he goes oh oh i look good and i was like i was just hype man i said oh oh yeah you do daddy oh my god so we're sitting there hyping him up right he's feeling the jacket he starts hitting this damn this irish yeah he dance. He said, because the ground was a little wet,

like a little slippery so I could slide. At the end, he slid his foot like far and it squeaked. So me being a little ass kid, we're the only ones, we're like the only ones in the store. I don't even know

if there's employees in there. It's like we just snuck in. So I go, I go, bro, do that again. That was funny. So he hits the jig,

slides it, and I was like, one more time, go as long as you can. He goes, and he literally falls to his knees in the middle of this shopping shopping store in the middle of this store i almost just uppercutted myself oh my god i hate when i do that you would fell to his knees in the

middle of this store and i'm thinking he's just bullshit and i'm like bro get up like it wasn't that funny and he literally looks up to me he's immediately crying he's like i pulled something i pulled up my quad and he's holding right here i'm like that's not your quad he goes go to hell and he literally lips the rest of the way like he said you what'd you say it was like oh it's on my groin and they wrapped all the way, like, where am I? Yo, yo. You ass. Talk. Feel how wet it is. Close your legs.

There's so much skin showing. What size are those? I don't know how to dry my clothes. Everything is so small. Those don't shrink. You're just, your ass is eating them. Like, dig it out. Call me Meg the Payton. No

Meg the Payton Payton the stallion Yeah, so it was like all wrapped around like my butt crack and then went down like my right back of my whatever Oh And then I did something else with my elbow. I was trying to do this. And then after the leg, he's sitting there limping, and he's still talking about the jacket, and he goes, oh, no, you're talking about pants. He said, in pants. He said, I'd be like this in the pants. And he goes, oh!

Like, it was a matter of five minutes. He's just breaking his body. Your body was finally failing you. I was like that guy from SpongeBob. I was like, I made a glass glass and my skin's made of paper. Oh my God. Yeah, it was a rough time. What was I saying though?

Was I talking about my fingernails still? No, you said, you said, oh yeah, we've ended the fingernails. You swiped at me and said my shoulder hurts.

Oh yeah. Your body's breaking down. Other than me breaking myself this week, like, and the shitty story that I'm going to tell later in the podcast.

One thing i did learn about myself and i've been working on it for a while to show you but it really this week really messed up my um my my training camp as i'm learning how to talk backwards i watched the youtube video on it and i think it's one of the most impressive things i've been learning what's what good is that what does that gain you in this life it's not really anything but it's more of like a party trick okay like if anybody would be like what's your secret talent talking backwards yeah is what you would confidently say as a man yeah i can speak backwards yeah can you no try me give me give me sentences start it off simple hi my name is payton

that's that's little words are harder little words. Hi, my name is Peyton. That's, that's, little words are harder. Hold on, little words are harder. Hold on. Hi, my name is Peyton. My, hi, my name is Peyton. Hi, my name is Peyton. Peyton name. Hi.

You fucking suck. Wait, dude, again. Dude, training camp just No give me a better one that's hard That was really hard That dog barked loud Loud dark that Maybe I'm not good

Wait a minute You said badog Give me three sentences three words Eggs are good Good are eggs That's not a Hell yeah Boom bitch Three words. Three words. Eggs are good. Good are eggs. That's not a skill. Hell yeah.

Boom, bitch! What is that stance? There's so much space from the couch to the wall. That is not... That's not a skill. Okay. If you can only do it with... That's like I'm the best mathematician there is,

but you can't give me anything over three digits. No, I didn't say that I was the best. Oh, but you're in a the best. Give me another one. Now go to four. Are you going to sign a contract? Go to four words. Okay. Yeah. Eggs are really good. Good.

Good really are eggs. Oh! Soldier boy up in... Right? Yeah. No. All right. This will be impressive.

There's so many Nats. This will be impressive. Okay, here we go. Peyton is my name. I am strong. Holy shit. Peyton is my name i am strong holy shit payton is my name i am strong strong am i payton wait what's the first sentence payton is my name i am strong strong am i and what's the first sentence? Peyton is my name. Peyton is my name. I am strong. Peyton is my name.

Name, Peyton is. Wait. Okay, come back in two weeks. Get it. Get it. You can get it. Come on, buddy. Fight for it.

Peyton is my name. My name is Peyton. My name is strong. Oh, my name is Peyton. Peyton is name my. Say the whole thing all at once now. My name is Peyton. Peyton is name my. Say the whole thing all at once now. My name is Peyton. I am strong.

Strong am I. Peyton. Nope. My name is Peyton. Oh, yeah, you're right. I'm so sorry. Peyton is name my. Now all together.

I fucking did. No, you didn't. I'm not your circus animal. You act and look like one. Okay, that wasn't. That wasn't. That wasn't. You know did. No, you didn't. I'm not your circus animal. You act like, you act and look like one. Okay. That wasn't, that wasn't. That wasn't, you know me. Come on.

You know what kind of animals they cut in the zoo? You. Oh, you know what I've been thinking about? Right? So I fall in love quick. You do. Like two days. Like scary.

So I was talking to this girl, first DMs, and I really liked her. She was really nice to me. She asked me how my day was and asked if I ate. And so I was like, we're meant to be and i really liked her she was really nice to me she asked me how my day was and asked if i ate and so i was like we're meant to be what's our child's name gonna be and then i told her i want to buy a monkey with her that was what within two days i invited her to move in with me swear i invited her to move in with me i think she lives in like one of the states that really aren't real like idaho something like that and then i i i said move in and i will buy a little monkey what was her response to that um she goes not yet not yet i'm good you're weird bye that's another thing i don't like and i think it's really immature i was gonna say this for the dr p segment but this is something

that's really immature i don't like when i've had a girl tell me that my response time creeps them out because how fast it is that's bullshit that's i like sorry sorry that i like you and i'm making you a priority yeah girl dude women oh love them i do love one love woman woman whoa man whoa man whoa man. Whoa man. Whoa man. I love one man. Whoa man. Whoa. God. I love Olivia. There we go.

No, but that's always a tricky, that's a tricky pond to fish in, if you know what I'm saying. Yeah, because I'm not going to be like, oh, I can't open their message. Too fast. You're a creep fest. You have nothing better to do. You're just staring at the phone. Too slow. You're playing hard to get.

You're a cool guy, bad guy. Yeah. It's like, what's a middle ground? What's a middle ground? It's like, you will see how much I like you based on my response time. If I leave you on read for three days. See, but that's so unfair to you. That's so unfair to you.

Why? You actually like someone bad, and she goes, you're a creep. Yeah. She goes, maybe slow down. She said maybe slow down? Yeah. I'd say maybe not be shallow. Ooh.

Shallow. That's not the song. That's not the song. Okay, speaking of Olivia, I don't know what just made me think about this you love her oh that's true and you miss her a little bit but yeah i did i'm taking her place in the bed but you did you stayed the night one night we didn't sleep in the same bed yes we did no we didn't i crawled in there at 343 i crawled in there at 343 343 i was dead asleep so you might have you smell like fritos under the covers that would be ruby and you nope no i smell like graciousness okay so olivia calls me this is uh two days before she leaves for her trip

now my tip is i told you i told you not to drink that. Bro. Uneat your shorts. They are so short. Pull them out. Like I'm seeing the white part of your thigh. Anyway. It's because my panties are too tight. Yeah, you need new panties. You need to go get that 7 for $20.

You're such a creep. Go. So, Olivia, stop being a freak bag then oh it's just me olivia calls me right it was the day we came out here to uh work okay yeah and she was by herself doing her whatever so she's in her own car she calls me and she goes babe i can't do it i just i have to i'm like what i'm thinking she's talking about stopping to get gas something i can't make it and i was like what the hell are you talking about she goes i'm gonna pee on myself and i'm like okay what? I'm thinking she's talking about stopping to get gas, something. I can't make it. And I was like, what the hell are you talking about? She goes, I'm going to pee on myself. And I'm like, okay.

She's being super dramatic. She's like, no, I'm literally going to have to piss myself, and then we're going to have to go get a shop vac. And I said, you sound like you're being serious. This isn't funny. There's no camera rolling. You're not peeing yourself. You're a 25-year-old woman.

She goes, babe, you don't understand. It's hurting so bad. I have no choice but to pee. We were literally probably a mile away from a gas station. I said, Olivia, if you can't hold your bladder for one more mile, then we might have to just second guess. We might have to drop some papers. Yeah, we're going to have to figure something out because this can't happen.

She goes, if I don't make this light, I'm pissing myself. She was dead ass. This was on FaceTime. I could read her face. She was not joking. She literally was about to. Like, I can read her face. She's not joking. She literally was about to pee herself. That's irresponsible. As hell.

Yeah. And I was like, I literally, I was like, Liv, if you piss yourself, I'm not cleaning your car. I'm never getting in your car again. Matter of fact. Oh. I thought of a story, but I don't know if we could say it. Say it.

The mason jar. That was insane. Olivia is notorious for having to piss in the car, apparently. Yeah. And we were going to a club. Yeah. At late hours of night after hanging out with friends and whatnot. And it was about a 30-minute drive.

I had just bought mason jars from Walmart to make overnight oats. You know, food. Edible things. Nourishment. Edible. Food in these jars. She has to pee so bad. I'm on an interstate going like 80 i'm not taking

this i'm not exiting there is no exits whatever we're just going i'm like babe please hold your bladder she goes no i have to do it right now so it got to the point she's basically like pulling my like she's forcing my hand yeah and i'm like babe we're five minutes away just hold it please she goes you know what fine don't even pull over it's fine i'm just use one of these i go one of what she literally rips open the package of mason jars in a car going 80 in the front seat and hits this audio listeners i'm sorry just imagine what i'm doing she goes i was i was utterly bamboozled like It was the strangest thing ever. So I immediately called Peyton. And she was like, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Just don't, just don't. I was like, okay. We get there, park our cars. I park right behind them. And I go, Pete, come here, look at this. Hold it. He goes, why the hell you got apple juice in a mason jar? And I go, no, she didn't.

She pissed in a mason jar. And Liv literally looked at me didn't she pissed in a man and live literally looked at me like she was like proud yeah she was like she had her hands up like she just won like a gold medal i'm like i had to go my wife i god i love her y'all love her too but she is she's an interesting one for sure now we got to talk about the story so i think it's weighing on my brain too much and we were just speaking about about cars i had the worst 24 hours of my entire life no it was actually insane i'm not sure we i laughed so much but no it was this is unbelievable so the whole team has been working hard it was the middle of the week and we were like guys let's all meet at cam's house it's 45 minutes away and then we'll go to the casino celebrate

the hard work we've done jackpot so so if y'all don't know i have a tesla you got to charge them things i'm new to the tesla world i'm thinking that the mileage it shows is honest is accurate yeah don't show me something i can't use so i had another two liter diet coke right so for some reason i don't know i don't have cups like i don't have like protein shake bottles to pour the drink into so i take a full two liter Diet Coke into my car. I'm going to sip on this for my road trip. 45 minutes to Cam's house. So I get into my car with my two liter. I'm like, okay, this is going to be great. I'm going to sip on this, head to Cam's house. The new Drake album just dropped. Perfect. As soon as I leave my parking garage, I'm like, okay, I'm already a little thirsty.

I untwisted. I don't know what on God's green earth happened to this. Somebody put dynamite in my Diet Coke. I open it up. It immediately explodes onto my face. I am blinded while I'm driving. My whole car smells of fountain drink. I was like, what?

My outfit that I planned and ironed was ruined i was pissed off already i had to turn around shower because i was sticky clean my car then head to cam's house and he has white leather seats it's the worst possible outcome that can happen i'm like this started off shitty but the day can turn around i drive to cam's house we get to cam's house the whole group is there, ready to go to the casino. And for some reason, I was feeling like Paul Revere. I was feeling like I want to take the whole team in my car. Quarterback, QB1, just backpacking everybody. I love it. So I'm like, guys, I'll drive us to the casino. It's about 50 minutes away.

I can make it. How many miles do you think that was away i'd say around around 50 honestly because it's straight shot like highway yeah 50 55 away yeah it's about 50 miles away my car read 116 miles tell empty and i was like if i'm doing the math right i can make it there and back with 16 to spare perfect Perfect. We get in the car. We're driving to the casino. High energy, high vibes. Life is good. We get to the casino and I'm like, the mileage dropped on this car a lot.

And I'm like, it says 46 miles until empty. And I'm like, hold a motherfucking minute. We can't make it back like that sure can't i'm like this is a huge casino i'm thinking they got some kind of electrical vehicle chargers has to around we stop a cop on a bike we're like sir excuse me where are the ev chargers at he goes oh we don't have any on the premises but if if you drive down the road right there, there's a hotel. They got some. And I say, gotcha.

Thanks, cop. I'm like, guys, y'all go in first. Grab me a drink. I'm going to drive, charge for a little bit. Good man. Come back. Good man. I drive to this hotel.

I'm like, based on the infrastructure of this hotel, it was built in 1980 and they haven't done one renovation. You have nothing that runs on electricity. Yeah. I was like, this is powered by coal. Like this, this does not have EV. So I go inside to the lovely hotel attendant. I'm saying, excuse me, I was instructed by somebody at the casino. On a bicycle.

On a bicycle that there is EV charging. She looks at me and says what's ev and i go i've made a mistake have a nice night hell girl and she and i go for a tesla charging and she goes oh we don't have that here but if you drive three miles the other way there's a little gas station and they have an ev charger and i say thank you so much for your duties ma'am gotta risk it for the biscuit probably should renovate this establishment i don't think this is up to code ma'am i drive three miles the other direction i see an ev charger i say oh god is good all the time i I reverse into the EV charger, grab the little tunnel,

grab the little plug-in to plug into my charger. Oh, wait a minute. Shit's not going in. And I said, this isn't right. I hit Google. Why isn't it fitting? Apparently, you got to get an adapter for those kind of chargers to fit into your Tesla.

I don't have that piece. Makes zero sense. There's more Teslas than any EV hey not i was gonna say not your problem quite literally your problem quite literally it was my problem so i go inside they have to sell them i go inside of this gas station excuse me do you have the little adapter bit to go into my Tesla because the EV charger ain't working. They say, we don't sell that here. And I go, your establishment should burn. They have to sell them.

And now I'm looking at my speedometer. It says 39 miles till empty. I go, this is real bad. All right. I'm like whatever i'm gonna go inside drink me a beer gamble a little bit maybe we'll figure something out maybe the grace of maybe i park on a spot that has electrical field magnetic poles and it just soups my car up i go inside we're gambling a little bit we're in there for hours. We're in the night.

We're up. It's good. We're like, okay, we've gotten a small win today. Very minute win. Now, I prep the group on the way back to the car as we're about to head home. I'm like, hey, guys, we're going to have to find the nearest Tesla supercharger to make it home. Because we can't make it all the way back with the charging we have. Fine by us you drove you did a good deed we're here for the ride the closest charger was 35 miles away and he had

36 miles on the car and i was like if we push it we can make it if this is accurate we will have one mile to spare. This is fine. Now we get to drive and commence the road trip. You know when you're so nervous driving that you put two hands on the wheel and your posture is that of a church boy? I was in there so locked in, the car was silent, right? Cam and our friend in the back were having fun conversations. There was not one glimpse of happiness that was in my body because how nervous I was.

Then Cam realizes we have a problem when he starts to look at the speedometer. So we're driving right and I don't know if you understand how speed and mileage works but if you're going around 80, you know, miles can add up pretty quick. You'll get there less than a minute because, you know, 80, 60, hour, whatever. So I'm looking at this speedometer, and it literally is going 35, 34. At that pace, I said, oh, this isn't good. It feels like it's dropping by the second. I said, hey, Pete, that's not good.

Like, we're gonna run out and i hope you have a backup plan and he looks at it and he goes oh oh god oh dear god and it is like legit dwindling it's like 35 34 32 31 and i'm like we're not we're not going 120 it's not happening so then the inevitable happens the car starts to turn on every light it's blinking it's yelling at me elon comes to the screens like hey you're gonna die the car starts to shut down we have to pull over on the side of the highway highway of cars and 18 wheelers going 90 miles per hour and we're in the middle of nowhere there's not a street light in sight we are stuck and stranded in the woods on the side of the highway pitch black pitch black

we get out of the car we call roadside assistance we need a tow they go okay we'll send one to your location in 60 minutes and i go it is 1 a.m we are going to die we're sitting out there waiting trying to make the most of the situation but out of the woods behind us oh my god we hear crinkle crackle and we're like either there's a beast or Freddy Krueger. We turn around and there's a man in a jumpsuit that comes. I kid you not. A man in a jumpsuit comes out of the woods walking like he just won a UFC Bellator belt. He literally was hitting the McGregor walk. Like, where did you come from? Where are you going and where did you come from?

Did you just spawn? And I always think, it's like, I know why I'm here on the side of a highway at 1 a.m. My car died. What the hell are you doing? What is your itinerary right now? What are you going to? Where did you come from?

What the hell is going on? He literally just spawns. And the scary part is, he didn't even acknowledge us. Didn't look at us. Didn't care about us. Was just on a mission to go do probably something illegal and vicious. Didn't offer acknowledge us didn't look at it didn't care about us was just on a mission to go do probably something illegal and vicious didn't offer help didn't ask didn't care kind of respected he just minded his own business but what are you doing like what are you doing so then

boom an hour passes tow truck comes we're like oh thank god we call an uber the uber lady's lost for another 30 minutes that's a story by itself They take the car to the nearest supercharger. I'm like, hey, just take me and my friends home. Uber takes us home. We sleep the night away. We're like, Cam's going to take me to the supercharger in the morning. We'll just plug it in. We'll be good.

All is well. We get four hours of sleep. Cam wakes me up the next morning. We head to the car in the supercharger. I'm like, oh, they backed it into the spot perfectly. Just got to plug in. Grab the supercharger. The hell's going on?

It's not plugging in. That means you can't charge a car if there's not a little battery left. You can't even charge a fully dead Tesla. I'm like, what is happening? It is 8 a.m. Well, call Roadside again. Hey, can't charge the Tesla that you towed yesterday. They go, you got to get somebody to jumpstart it.

You go, that's interesting. That's why I'm calling you. You're going to come jumpstart my car right now. They say, we'll have somebody out there in 60 minutes. And I go. Is that their promised time? Hey, you could be in inevitable danger. We'll get to you in an hour.

Then Cam sees that I am physically distraught. I am in a horrible mood. I'm down $400 from the tow truck. I'm about to have to spend more money on the jump starts. Cam sees there's an academy right across the street. He goes, Peyton, let's just go to the academy. Have fun. Two dudes in academy just killing time.

So we get there. I'm throwing a little junior-sized football. I'm like, hey, look at those firearms. Those are cool are cool can't touch it just trying to boost his mood there's not a smile on my face he's working hard so he's looking down you know just thump just spamming fingers texting all these people right and i finally crack a joke that resonates with him he looks up and giggles there is blood rushing out of his mouth. And I literally screamed in the academy and ran away from him. There was so much blood.

It was like that type of blood. You know how if you floss and you just like kill your gums, it's like seeping through the teeth. He was like, and I was like, oh, bro, you're bleeding. I said, your mouth is bleeding. He said, really? And I was like and i was like oh bro you're bleeding said your mouth is bleeding he said really and i was like oh my god i ran away scared the shit out of this little small family of four and i was crying laughing turns out when bubba gets anxious and pissed off shoes on the inside of his lip like a savage you little cannibal like just calm down this man was bleeding from his mouth i had to go to the bathroom wash my mouth out there i was literally spitting like i just got out of a like a boxing match like a surgery so much blood was in my mouth but then boom i get

a call from roadside assistance hey your jumpstart people are there make your way back to the tesla i say okay i make my way back to the tesla jim and dean are out there trying to fix my tesla they're googling youtube videos how do you jump start an electric vehicle they finally figure it out boom plug the tesla in it's time to go i'm like thank god my nightmare is over we have a meeting to go to me and cam we do like cam on four hours of sleep, mind you. Yeah. So I'm like, okay, follow me to the meeting. I know exactly where it's at, Cam.

Thank God our hell trip is over. I kid you not. Four minutes into my drive to the meeting. What? My whole, I thought I got shot. Like, I'm like, what the hell is going on? I look up. My windshield is shattered.

A rock smacks the shit out of my Tesla. I kid you not. You've been stoned. Every intrusive negative thought that has ever gone through my skull was this close to happening i have never been so mad i swear to god i'm driving like this son of a bitch you mother i am so pissed off. And that was the worst day I've ever had. So sorry if I'm not in the best mood today. Oh, no.

And on that trip, we witnessed GTA in real life. After your windshield got shattered. Oh, my God. He was in the middle of a chase, like of a crime. Oh, my God. He was in the middle of a chase, like, of a crime. Oh, my God. So his shit gets cracked. He literally calls me. I'm, like, two cars behind him following him.

He's like, you will not fucking believe. And I was like, what? He was like, I am done. He goes, my shit is shattered. I was like, what? He said, wham, went the stone. His shit is shattered i was like what he said wham with the stone it's just shattered and i go yo yo wait oh whoa i swear to god these two it was like a corolla and like a ford focus they are swerving through this car is trying to catch this car for whatever

reason we don't know yeah but this car the front one red one goes in front of payton this one has to get behind payton this one's trying to accelerate this one's trying to get through payton payton was like whoa yeah i was like what the hell is going on like what the hell the back car swerves back comes up to payton quickly he's like sorry so sorry like the windows down his hands out he's like fully extended he's like he's like i'm sorry man i'm sorry but then he goes swerves up he's like just like screaming at the red car he's like fake hitting him bro it was oh my god it was imagine all of that on like four hours of sleep mixed with every single thing that happened oh my god dude it was the worst time ever it was so funny it was the worst time it sucked ass for you i'm so sorry.

All right. Yeah, that was unbelievable. Oh my God. All right. Give me something to get my mind off this, Cam. Okay. Oh, I saw this. I saw this on Twitter and I was wondering, I want to ask you, what is the last movie

that you've cried to? Oh shit. I don't know. Oh, actually I cried at First Person Shooter recently. A video game? What are you talking about? No, the J. Cole and Drake song that just dropped. I swear to God.

You cried to a song? A rap song? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know why I did that. I don't know what came over me because I like this song, but not that much. I'm so done with you. Yeah, it was a-

What part could solicit tears from that song? It wasn't even the first time I listened to it, too. It was like the third play, and I was like, this is really good. And you shed a tear. Yeah, it was like when Cole really started going, and I was like, I was like this. I was like, I got goosebumps, and I was like, and it was not like I was boo-hooing, but something came out. You need to be analyzed.

Like, someone that I've never heard, I've never, I've never cried at a rap song. Yeah, me neither. I've never cried at a song. Oh, I have. Oh, no, no, I take that back. When I hear the song, Live Walk Down the Aisle 2, it always gets me emotional, but there's a reason. You're crying to J. Cole on his mogul rap, talking about i'm the best yeah and he cried it's like and then drake was

like a pack of me like sardines and i was like yeah he did pauline shawley yeah it got an mo you got elicited a tear it was strange times i can't even ask you just like regular bar questions like well that's not a bar that'd be a horrible bar conversation but i can't ask you just like regular bar questions. Like, well, that's not a bar. That'd be a horrible bar conversation. But I can't ask you just regular talk. Are you dead? Because there's a gnat that's been circling you for about 45 minutes. No, because we're infested here at You Should Know Studios. Oh, oh, I have a question for you.

And we haven't done one of these in a while. Okay. I had to get off that because it's embarrassing. Like saying it out loud, that is embarrassing. That's sad. Yeah. I'm sorry. I just wanted to bite my fingers.

Sorry, Drake. You're a grown-ass man. I'm an emotional boy. How do you... I don't... I just can't... Well, you literally have no emotion in your body. That's not true. That's not true.

All right, I have a Would You Rather. We haven't done one of these in a while. We do Would You Rathers a lot, but not, like, animal ones. Oh, God. I've been watching a lot of Animal Planet. You all... Yeah, you need to... You have a weird obsession with animals.

Of all the real shit you watch, like pop culture stuff and housewives, you watch Animal Planet a lot. Because it makes me competitive. It really gets on my competitive drive. Now, I feel like you're going to be really ignorant on this. And maybe you're smart. Maybe I'm not giving you enough credit. Yeah. But a lot of people are going to be ignorant about this.

Would you rather be bit by a black mamba or a leatherback sea turtle is that a serious question dead ass be honest i would much much much rather be bit by a leather back seat oh ignorant ignorant ignorant A leatherback sea turtle? Okay. Google something in your life. Google a black mamba. Google a black mamba. Google a black mamba.

Google a black mamba. Hey, I'm about to tell you something. I'm about to learn you something. It is a... I'm about to learn you something. A leatherback sea turtle grows over eight feet tall. Eight feet tall. Cool.

Can weigh over 200 pounds and bite through bones you want to go to sea it can bite through boats imagine dwight howard okay with teeth that's not that's this okay my turn for black mamba it bites you life bye-bye you are in paralysis okay within 10 minutes how big how big how big how big how big within 10 minutes. How big are black mamas? How big are black mamas? Is that eight feet? What the hell? We're getting bit by it.

We're not having to strangle it. I don't think you understand how big eight feet is. That doesn't matter. It's the bite. You said, do you want to get bit? What are you doing? Get your... How tall am I?

Six, seven. That's... Now imagine two more feet on that Okay Big ass turtle And I can bite through your goddamn boat Would you rather Have a piece of your arm missing

Or die? That's what you should have asked me No Would you rather lose an arm Or lose your life? You can outrun a black mamba Lose your leg or lose your soul? That's what you're asking me

Alright Say we're in this room right now Lose your knee or lose your existence? Say we're in this room right now No No Shut up You just said you can outrun a black mambo.

You're not running. You said, would you rather be bit by it? Black mammas can't run. You didn't say you have to survive it. Black mammas don't kill. The question was, would you rather be bit? Exactly. You can die.

By a black mambo. No, by a leatherback sea turtle. If it snaps your neck. Hey, I don't know who you think you are, strong man. You're not as strong as a boat, dog. What is your neck? Hey, I don't know who you think you are, strong man. You're not as strong as a boat, dog. What is your question? I have a theory that it wasn't an iceberg that took down the Titanic. It was a gang of leatherbacks going, mine.

It was a hunting ground of leatherbacks. Have you been on a cruise? Yes. Now imagine how big that is. Yes. And a leatherback sea turtle can take down your circus cruise. ground of leather have you been on a cruise yes i want to now imagine how big that is yes and a leatherback sea turtle can take down your circus cruise no it can't you like the buffet on the poop deck it's gone do you like anything in life not really breathing living eating farting

anything chains do you like anything yes don. Don't pick Black Mamba. Okay, now imagine. Now imagine. I'm, oh my gosh. For someone that watches Animal Planet, you are a stupid idiot. Imagine, right? Oh my God. Say you're in a room, right?

Say you're in your bathroom. Say you're in your bathroom. What is up with this? You close the door and you lock it, right? You close the door and you lock it, you don't have the key. Can't get out. The plumbing is not sufficient. You can't turn on the water if you wanted to.

Get to it! You're trapped in a bathroom. Would you rather be trapped in a bathroom with a leatherback sea turtle or a black mamba? Answer. A leatherback sea... First off, you've asked seven questions. The original question was bit by. So I'm assuming we're taking a bite.

If it's anything to the neck head you both you die either way but let's just say it's our leg you will not get that leg back would you exactly do you want to lose your leg or lose your soul you're not gonna die what do you think you make okay if there's immediate medical services there okay i might take the black mamba i'll you'll be poisoned as shit you'll go into paralysis. You won't. What is your name? Give me your government name right now. What is your name?

It's not Bear Grylls, okay? You're not a survivalist expert. You sit for Dallas. I watch more Animal Planet than you. You sit naked and sweaty and watch Animal Planet. Naked and sweaty watching Animal Planet from the comfort of your couch. You're not out there With the shits A black It is a black

No basketball player said Oh my nickname's The leatherback sea turtle It's a black mamba Popularity doesn't mean strength Oh my god Popularity does not mean strength My skin is crawling

Okay okay Say you're laying down right And you're tied up Right Would you rather get attacked By a leatherback sea turtle Or would you rather get attacked By a black mamba

You answer Who That motherfucker Would shoot through your intestines dog Who bound my hand and you're tied up. Right? Would you rather get attacked by a leatherback sea turtle or would you rather get attacked by a black mamba? You answer. That motherfucker would shoot through your intestines, dog. Who bound my hand? Me. What are these scenarios? Bro. No.

Oh, no. Don't go to Google. Don't run to it. A black mamba, if it bites you, can cause bulbar symptoms, parthesia,

fasciolutions, axia, loss of consciousness, paralysis, parthesia, fasciolutions, axia, loss of consciousness, paralysis, pain, nausea, cough, profuse sweating, poisoned blood, everything. Right here. Paralysis. This is where reading comprehension comes in. Listen, did you hear the first thing he said? It can.

Not it will. Oh, no, I just said that It says symptoms include As in they are guaranteed Coming with the product It is gonna happen I said it can Earth said it will happen

Okay You know what will happen? Lose your leg Lose your leg lose your life You're gonna die if you lose your leg If you get bit And it takes your legs. That's my leg. I got legs now.

What do you think is gonna happen? You just get a tourniquet automatically? That's what I'm saying. Are we with- You're done, dog. No. You're done either way. You're in your bathroom. Do you know what- You're in the bathroom, dog. If we were in the bathroom, I'd survive losing a leg.

I would take that towel and wrap that bitch. I'd MacGyver the hell out of my leg. You are so stupid. You have to try. You're overly confident in yourself. You have to try. You're overly confident. You have to be overly confident in life or death situations. It's fight or flight.

Honestly, deadass. Oh, don't you dare say that. No, no, no. Listen, I'm deadass and I was thinking this whenever we were stranded. I'm better at survival than anybody in our friend group. Like, in dire situations, I'm the band to go to. No, you are not. Yes, I am.

You're good. You're good at that. I'm good. You're good at that. I'm great. You're good at that. You're very good at that. I came up with, like, six ideas on the spot to help us get out. Right? Everybody else is, ah, I'm in a panic.

It's because we couldn't really help you. I didn't need help. Exactly. But we couldn't talk to, it was your phone. You had to call Tesla Roadside, so we just had to sit there. If we were stranded in, like, a damn a damn forest yeah you and me would be team captains and we would we would divide and and and and whenever we were at the movie theater and we thought bang bang was happening they cleared us out what did you do special there i was like i

was giving us an escape plan so we're gonna go through here don't i was like hug this car go out here don't pop up in the middle over there. Dead ass. I'm good at survival. All right, John Wick. I'm not good at a lot. English and survival. English, podcast, survival. That's a hell of a resume. That is a hell of a resume.

I'm not good at bathing, though. You're not. Or smelling good. I actually do smell good right now. Sweating. Can't control it. Being alone. I'm good at being alone i'll give you that

all right that's enough making fun of me i'm tired of my confidence is so low my car is shattered um i think we can we can brighten up the mood oh how can we do that it was highly requested by the family oh was it the best love doctor has made up here is back. He's returned for a second consecutive week. And that's none other than... Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P.

Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. Dr. P. You gotta stop that little one at the end. I. Dr. P. Dr. P. You gotta stop that little one at the end. I hate that. Dr. P, the best love doctor in the world is here. Love doctor.

Love doctor. Love you, doctor. Love you, too. Love doctor. All right. Dr. P. Dr. P. So. Love.

Oh, you remember that one last week? I have a follow-up. P. Dr. P. So. Love. Oh, you remember that one last week? I have a follow-up. Sex. Remember that one that said we told them to tell the girlfriend to call the friend? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. He did it. Oh, my God.

He DM'd me and said, I told her. I did what y'all told me to do. I told her to call the friend. She got mad at me, but she ended up doing it. Come to find out, they've been doing stuff with each other for a while now he broke up with her shout out to him for leaving the best love doctor in the world dr p dr p dr p dr p dr p hey give him some applause right now. He just saved a man from torture, anguish, agony. This comes from a lovely woman.

Ooh, ooh, time out. Do we need a precursor? Do we need a, we need a, it's always different. Come on. You read it. You ready, boss? I'm ready. I love my job, Sia.

Sorry, Secretary Kim. Okay, here we go. I've tried to go to the Bahamas. Dear Dr. P. Hello. So I have been with my boyfriend for a couple of months now, and he goes to see his mom and brother, but there's this one girl over there.

There's always that one girl. Wait, at the house? There's this one girl over there that's always getting a little too comfortable with him. And when his mom introduced me to her, she got visibly upset and left. And I don't know what to do because he's always going up there and spends

all his time with her not even his mom and when i bring it up to him he tries to discard it and tell me i'm overreacting this is what i have to say about that it's so good how my instinctual doctor skills come in because you're the greatest love doctor in the nation i am the greatest love doctor in the nation some may even say world we we Because you're the greatest love doctor in the nation. I am the greatest love doctor in the nation. Some may even say world. We need to get the greatest love doctor in the world the greatest mic stand in the world. So, this is what I'm thinking is happening.

This is what I know is happening. Give me the rundown. Give us the rundown. Save another one. This man's in two relations. I hate to break it to you. You are in a trifecta of love. Hell of a diagnosis

He loves that girl Oh no yeah If he's going up there And covering up his mom I'm just saying The mom knows her You've done 24 years of studying And physical research in the field

So I'm gonna let you continue If the mom is involved That's not just a little No that is That's a fair point That's love That is love. Oh, my God.

And he always goes up there. And you know it. You know the answer. You know that they love each other. What you need to do is go. Just go. I wouldn't ask any questions. You've only been together for a couple months.

Y'all are friends. Facts. Y'all are friends at that point. You might be like, oh, oh my god i like him so much don't go further into the relationship don't make a stronger connection and then you're still sharing boyfriends get out of the pool don't throw the buoy don't throw the lifeline don't try to salvage it get out of the body water it's a weird thing you know dr p had a similar situation with this in his in his life i had a girlfriend in high school. Oh.

And God, Dr. B never gets personal. We went through this problem, right? Uh-huh. She would always call me somebody else's name. Oh, no. Okay, that's just sick. Like, she would be like, oh, Brady. I'd be like, huh? What the fuck is that?

Who's Brady? I don't have a single B in any of my names. Yeah, and then she'd be like, I'm so sorry. You just, I don't mean it. My brain. I'd be like, fuck your brain. Who's Brady?

Wow. Brady sucks. That sounds like, she definitely picked the wrong guy. Yeah. Brady? Brady. If your name's Brady,

I love you. It was her ex. That's tough, dog. Yeah. Is that what made you join the profession? Yes. It is? Heartbreak and agony

then i got into another relationship while i was in a relationship i was doing with your boyfriend oh no come on come on they come to you for advice and love it's not pain it's dr p don't rub it it's dr p i'm see i'm an honest man that is honesty's best policy honesty is the best policy that's why you should walk up to him slap him no oh dr p does not that you don't get fired secretary i love my job sire great benefits lord you don't get benefits well that's right i don't there's not your third party insurance yeah it's expensive it's so expensive yeah no yeah he don't touch him don't know fit no don't physically touch him don't

you dare do that but just leave like you said just listen to the doctor but get the hell out also dr p's a little toxic but in this new day age of medicine i feel toxicity is needed in some in some recipes you you want to know what dr p toxic side say let's hear it don't tell your boyfriend y'all's boyfriend don't tell y'all's boyfriend but you know what you do you get you get that girl alone you and the girl and you go hey me and so and so me and him had a conversation and he's telling me how close y'all are and he said he feels like there's something that y'all have talked and y'all have something special and honestly watching y'all together i feel like that happiness is more than ours

and if she gets excited and if she gets like i've been telling him that then you know that's how you that's nice you're leaving regardless you like you like the hansel and gretel approach i've never seen that movie. Your mic stand is as crooked as my spine. It always just sleeps. You like the mousetrap approach. I like that too, though, because it makes them eat their own words. That's the biggest fly I've ever seen in my life. That's Ruby with wings.

That was a dragon. That was a small dragon. But you like making them choke on their own actions. Yes. It's a weird sentence as well. It's so straight. That's why you're the secretary. That's exactly why I'm the secretary.

Couldn't make it through medical school. And that was Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P Dr. P But now it's time for people's favorite segment you know what that is pop culture

pop culture paying in camp yeah no that that's crazy being in two reasons at the same time you she belongs or not she he belongs under the prison. Yeah, 100%. Under the prison. But for pop culture, I'm going to kick it off because I'm going to steal yours, and we're both unbelievably excited about it. Logan Paul, Dylan Danis is... It already happened. For them.

Oh, shit, it did. Yeah. We can give our predictions, see if we're right. Yeah, it did already happen. Oh, my God. Okay, so he wants logan to win duh i want dylan to win don't know why and it's no he likes guys that are no no i was just about to say guys that are mean to women no not at all i just i'm not a fan of logan paul like he

watching him grow and grow and grow he just became more corrupt and fantastic businessman 100 there's no doubt about that i just don't really like him. I think maturing is liking Jake more than Logan because for years it's like Logan was the nice one. Jake is just like the guy that doesn't give a shit, but now it's like, you know. I don't know none of them. I don't either, but just watching them from a distance. Yeah, I'm going for the underdog because I think Logan's going to win.

I think that's inevitable. I think Logan 100% wins the fight, but I want Dylan to. I want the underdog to win. And then in the co-main, I want Tommy to win. And Tommy will win. Actually, you know the co-main is Logan and Dylan? Is it really? Which is so stupid.

It's a prime card. But I don't know. That's dumb. No one really cares about that fight. Yeah. But, yeah, KSI's going to get pieced up. So we both want Tommy to win, but then the main, or I guess, hell, the co-main, we're going to be cheering or going against each other.

Going against each other. You want to put money on it? It's always good, though. No. Well, that's no fun. Yeah, well, we can just watch and give each other friendly banter, chit-chat. What else is happening? Oh, UFC.

Oh, my. Oh, my God. Next Saturday. What would that be? I don't know. I don't know. Like the 21st, 22nd. I don't know. Some shit. would that be? I don't know. Like the 21st, 22nd. I don't know.

Some shit. But 24th. I don't care. But that day, that fight, it's in Abu Dhabi. Basically, two people just dropped out. And Dana was in that thing just... Cooking. Grease, wrist, foot in the pot.

That boy was cooking. Alexander Volkanovski stepped up, took the fight. Kamaru Usman stepped up, took the fight. Both on 10-day notices. It's just, I mean, it's music to our ears. It's unbelievable. I cannot wait for that. It's going to be amazing.

Like, that is two powerhouse fights. Oh, my God. So y'all can put y'all's predictions in the comments below. 100%. I don't really care about the rest of the card, but those two main ones. But that was... Pop Culture Payday Cam. Pop Culture Payday Cam.

Wow. All right, get us out of here, Cam. Guys, this was episode 82. We absolutely love y'all. We are so, so, so close. We can almost... Taste it. We can almost taste it, grab it, touch it, feel it.

Like a leather bag snapping turtle. We are right. Like a black mamba will kill you. We are so close to being in Gramercy Theater. October 28th, New York City, New York. I was just doing a dance. Oh, I thought you were like. Gramercy Theater.

Gramercy Theater, October 28th, New York City, New York. We are very, very, very close to it. Less than two weeks out when y'all see this. But thank you for coming back episode 82 after party's gonna be announced soon we're working on it after party's gonna be announced very soon we are working on it it's getting very close to being finalized but we love y'all this week good car i don't know why this stuck with me so much it resonated with me it never happened to me but i'm gonna say this week's code is UIP.

UIP? Under the prison. Oh, that's UTP. Oh my God. I said under in prison. Oh my God. UTP. Under the prison.

That's just a sick scenario. He doesn't deserve much happiness, but that's a very rude thing to say. That's a rough thing. That's why you're the secretary. I take that back. That's why I'm the secretary. Please don't. He doesn't. That's just sick.

I don't like seeing people do that. He's in two relationships. He's in two relationships. That's not a good guy. You deserve i don't like seeing two relationships two relationships that's not you deserve better queen you do queen leave him go get better so this week's get your good karma leave it on instagram post leave it on tiktok leave it on here leave it in discord everywhere and anywhere utp got there confuse the casuals get your good karma we absolutely love y'all koala club keep watching out for patreon uh coming out multiple things coming out this up this upcoming week for y'all we Koala Club, keep watching out for Patreon. Coming out, multiple things coming out this upcoming week for y'all. We love all the Koala Club members.

And remember, one out of ten koala bears don't make it home to Christmas, and we will see you next time. There's so many bugs in here. That's a big fly. That's a big fly on my knee. Kill it. See if you can get it. Bye.

This episode is brought to you by Harry's. You know, Uncle P? Oh, hello. There's just subscriptions for everything nowadays. There is indeed. There truly is. And some of them are just a bit much. Yeah.

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See if we liked it because we don't want to advertise anything to the Usional Podcast family that we don't like. And when I say it's one of the smoothest. Oh, it's so nice. Nicest shaves I've ever gotten in my life, Cameron. Oh, I love me some damn Harrys. And it's just, it's's so simple the trial set is a $13 value whoo three bones come on now say it again three dollars for a $13 trial pack wow at harrys.com slash ysk it includes five blade german engineered razor a weighted handle foaming

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