You Should Know Podcast - REVEALING OUR BABIES NAME! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: September 28, 2026

PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/YouShouldKnowPodcast TOUR TICKETS: https://www.youshouldknowstudios.com YSK UNPLUGGED: https://www.youtube.com/@YSK.UNPLUGGED FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/people/You-Should-Know-Podcast/61552092953106/ NEW TWITCH CHANNEL: https://m.twitch.tv/peytonhardin/home 00:00 CAM JOINS! 01:15 BRINGING BACK THE INTRO 02:04 THE EMPTY SACK 06:37 BANK WITHDRAWAL (GONE WRONG) 13:36 PRACTICING PUBLIC CONVERSATION 21:04 SHOPIFY 22:40 WHY DON’T BABIES SAY “SAY” 27:43 TAKING BABY NAMES TO THE JUDGE 31:42 READING THE CRAZIEST NAMES 39:07 HIMS 40:43 CELEBRITY BABY NAME DEBATE 45:10 NORMAL THINGS THAT WE HATE 46:21 EATING REGULAR FOOD AT MOVIES 48:26 SLEEPING WITH DOORS OPEN 50:53 MUSIC ONLY IN CARS 52:19 NO PUBLIC #2 53:22 SHY BOWEL SYNDROME 57:09 CASH APP 59:06 BREAKING THE 4TH WALL 1:01:50 EMBARRASSING FUNNY MARKO STORY 1:06:23 ANNOUNCEMENTS Todays Sponsors: Shopify - Free trial at https://shopify.com/ysk Hims - To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/YSK Cash App - Download Cash App Today: https://click.cash.app/ui6m/5tdivt3n #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. FOLLOW PEYTON: https://instagram.com/psh8?igshid=ZDg1NjBiNjg= JOIN THE DISCORD: https://discord.gg/V5WYhSte2R Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Everybody, welcome back to us on podcast episode 236. You'll never hear the cover. We just had, we got calls, Gail, back in the studio. Back in the studio, Bambachla Rastafaray, back to the Jamaican. If you're a new hero, if you haven't already looked below, you see the comment section isn't fulfilled. You're wrong. If you look even more below, then you see that comment section is fulfilled.

Dude, okay, I'm trying to bring it back. Yeah, you're good man. He's a man with people. I'm trying to reel it in and I can't. I can't. Because the way the old intro used to be, it was very, It was very structured, right? Very much so.

And it was like, okay, Cam's not in here yet. It's okay for me to have a full filibuster straight to my camera. But now it's awkward, because what do you do the whole time I sit there? I just sit here and play with my goodies. I literally just sit here and go, oh, okay. I'm just sitting there. Yep, we got both. Oh, press conversation.

Hey, everybody. I just sit here in silence. It's awkward. Yeah, let's try it. Okay. So we're going to see how Cam could try to not be awkward during the intro. If we try to bring back the old intro. You want to, ready?

Here we go. Hey, everybody, welcome back to the Uschino podcast, episode 236. If you're a new year or if you have already already and you look below you, you see the conversations of, what is it? If you look below you and you see the subscribe wasn't pressed, you're wrong. If you look even more below that, you see that conversation filled with your name, guess what? Even more on go and fill that out, get your good karma. We got goes, scam back in the studio. It sucks.

It sucks. It sucks. That's terrible. I'm just sitting here like a little prisoner the whole time. Yeah. Yeah. You have, you've blessed me with being here from the rip, from the push of the button. So to hell with the intro. Yeah.

Honestly, let's start it. Let's start a petition. That thing that mic's too long. It's drunk. It definitely fell. It definitely felt. Dude, you have like a curse with microphone stands. Like that microphone's hand is good. It works.

I was like, I think this is better. That's good. That's peak. That is really good. How is your week? It doesn't matter. I had a question about you. You brought up playing with yourself.

And you said you were feeling. to see if they were both there. And now this is a brotherly moment, right? I want to have it. It might be a little inappropriate. That's fine. I'm good for an inappropriate. As long as you want honesty.

You're about to unleash an honest king. Now, have you ever done the deed, right? The few times you have, probably the six times of your life you've done the deed. Yeah, one of the six times I've had. Yeah. Two of them resulted in children. Right. Did you ever look like at the end of your production, right?

Whenever you said, hooraw. Yeah, hoorah. Right? Job is done. Oh! Yeah. Did you ever lose it? lose one. Like a whole loos? I don't know about a lose. Like a little slippage though. It kind of went off

tilt, a little off kilter. Like it kind of like the whole plane, like an earthquake. Yeah. Like the both tectonic plates are there. One slipped under the other. We're talking about one of your ohos. One of your yo-yo's. Yeah. They went up to your gut and it's gone. Oh, dude. I had an empty nest one time. You're having bionic climaxes. You're losing a nut. I lost both of them. You took that way too literal. You were like, uh. Like the actual nuts like And now I'm here to pick up my trousers And I said look down

My buddies are gone And I go I feel I'm gone Like so something's missing You had a balloon down there You said like a balloon? So my buddies are gone So your ball sack felt like a balloon It was just skin

I was just skin And I want to know to my boys in the comments dude And I was I literally like Elasticated and it was just flat. Bro, that is in- I lost them. I lost them.

They came back, gravity did it say. You're like a Doberman pincher. Like you had, she got twisted on her. What do you, I don't understand how you lost then. That's that, that, no, I've never had a condition. Yeah. Something, no, no, no. Yeah.

She went wrong that night. She had voodoo dolls? Did she have something? No, no, no, no. Oh, God, dude. I, you're, wow. Now, I want to piggyback on a detail. It's like a tongue or a finger went too four or something.

I almost threw up. I almost threw up. Thinking about going, this is inappropriate. Okay. Now you said right when you finished, right when the red, we can't keep doing this.

No, no, this is not about that. Right when the credits ended. Yeah, right when you immediately went to pull up your trousers. Yeah.

Now I'm right there with you. Have you ever been that type of gal that just, that just, I mean, basks in your nudity after the deal. Yeah, when I'm in love.

Oh, dude. I mean, I'm in love with Olivia. Olivia's never seen me butt naked sitting relishing in our aftermath for more than 15. seconds. Oh, you're ashamed of what you do. No, it's just, it's a very like, like, you feel gross or so. No, no, it's more of like I, I, I, like, like, like, F1 mock speed, I go back to shrivel. And it's like, it's, oh, you're embarrassed. Oh, not my physical stature as a man, my pecker. Yeah, I know you're embarrassed about him. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, no, no. I'm like, no, no, no, what you just had and enjoyed is not here anymore. Really? Cannot see this. Yeah, no, no. Kim, Kim, you've been. Kim, you've been. together for 10 years. Oh, I know. It's, I don't know, man. Insecurities. I don't know if it's because

Sarah's a nurse, but like, I'll let Sarah look at my, like, my wink star if she needs to. Like, I don't care. I want to say something. It will get cut, but I want to say, because he just had a long month. It will, so I can't. I cannot say. But, but I'm saying, like, I don't, I don't find embarrassment in my partner anymore. Like, I don't eat, no, like, I don't either accepting that. Like, that's the only, and it's a weird. I think it's just the correlation of like, literally 30, seconds ago, I was my best. I was at peak performance. Game seven. And right now, I'm back to a rookie. You must have a lot of differentiation. Like that space from A to B, big grower. Yeah. Oh, I don't show much. Oh, I've said it. I've said it for years on the podcast. You pants me in public. A,

you have to die and then B, I have to move. Like, I have, you want to talk about a digital footprint. Holy Fri-it. It'd be like an infant footprint. It'd be like an itty-bitty little digital footprint. Yeah, I mean, that'd be, that's something you can't live down, to be honest. I'm not gonna lie. It's very much shower. Yeah. No, but I sit in it. I sit in it. I'll fall asleep. You know I fall asleep.

No. We can't tell us. Oh, yeah. No, that's. I'm, I'm, I'm, you are a year. I love Sarah a lot. You are a hair of Osborne. You are a green goblin.

I love Sarah. I'll snore. I'll hit, I'm, I'm, I'm known. Dude. I fall asleep while it's out. You do that. That's so, that is so bad. Oh, okay.

I don't care. Okay. I don't care. I love her. I have a story. Okay. That happened literally 45 minutes ago. Okay.

In the bathroom? We were in the bathroom 45 minutes ago. Yeah. 45 minutes ago. I assume, roughly. 30? Are you out of your mind? Okay, it was over an hour ago, but it's definitely, I was in the bathroom six minutes ago.

No, no. We've been here for 12. Then I was in the bathroom 12 minutes ago. No, you weren't. It doesn't matter. It doesn't. It doesn't. But you're talking.

your gauge of time is bad. You think it was almost an hour since I've been to the bathroom. Since you've been to the bathroom. You left to... Roughly. Roughly an hour. You cannot be serious. There's lots happened in between that.

Nothing happened in between that. People that use military time that aren't in the military or nurse are performative. And I want to... It really bothers me. And I just want to put that out. Like, police officers use it. I was watching this dash cam video. And he was getting a statement from somebody who got punched.

And he was like, all right, interview concluded at 18. and I was like, 1838, thank you, sir, and have a good one. I was like, bro, it's noon. Shut up, Connor. Yeah, okay, go ahead. Okay, so I went to the bank. I went to the bank to do a quick withdrawal, and I was already down here. I got here earlier, so I figured let me knock it out real quick.

Now, I go in here thinking it's going to be, hey, bada bing, bada, boom, here's my ID and card. Thank you for my money. Goodbye. Right. Now, I walk in, and there's an old man. How old are we talking? Um, based on appearance, I'd say 70s. Okay.

Old man. Yeah. And this very much made me think of you how you said you're going to have respect for no one when you're old and... Oh, borderline racist. To my own kind. To everybody's kind. Like, I'm going to hate that. Basically, I'm going to be everything.

Absolutely. Yeah. So this man's sitting there and he's at the teller. Yeah. And it's just, oh, yeah, that's how he sounds. Yeah. He's talking to his spirit at this point. And he has, now he's on a walker, all right?

Oh, assisted walking. And he has a person with him, I think. A handler. I'm not sure. if she is handler is crazy. I'm not sure if she's with him or if she's with the bank.

But it starts getting louder, right? And I'm like, there's no way. He's about to do this. There's no way. And then it gets just blatantly aggressive. He goes, oh, no, no, I ain't leaving today. Give me my money. This is my money.

Oh, no. And I go, oh, God, this is happening. Peyton, this went on for 20 minutes. An armed officer showed up. That's a lot. The old man... I recorded this.

No, you did not. Now, I'm not gonna show it for the sake of his face, but can I just play the audio? 100%. So this is like a 10-second clip. Just listen to what this man... This is 14 seconds.

Listen what this man was saying. Listen to him. He told the officer, I'll take your gun from you, mother-f-fri- He said, I'll beat your ass too. Oh. And he literally, he's...

First of all, who's getting him that upset? I don't know. You can't get... This is a bang's fault at that point. Oh, I don't know. though, it's like a toddler. You just lie to him. Like, you know, like,

and I think that's when he was upset it because he goes, what the fuck? You mean you can't give him? I got two million dollars in y'all's bank. He said that? Yeah. Oh, he's a liar.

I said, oh, the guy isn't a lunatic. I said, sir, you don't have two dollars. He said, I got two million dollars in this bank. The f*** me mean is I'm a whoop all, y'all. And he's saying all this thing. And he's not stopping. Yeah. And the handler woman is trying to like,

there you go. Slowly push his cart toward the door. He goes, get all. Off of me. He goes, pardon my language, but I will slap this shit out of you if you don't get off of me. And I'm like, oh my God. And the officer, that's when he jumps in. Yeah.

He goes, hey, hey, he, like, immediately. Everyone else is like, sir, you need to leave. Like really corporate. Sorry, I'm, sir, we're not going to be able to serve you today. We have the right to refuse. You're going to need to get. Right. Bank, by the way.

It's his best food. We have the right to say no and you're going to need to leave. 100%. The officer goes, hey, hey, enough for that, bro. Way too loud. And you're way too old for this. He goes, who do you think you are? He said, I'll whoop y'all.

And the officer goes, I'd hate to see you try to do that. He's literally like, I would fuck you up. And I was like, oh, man, you can't do that too, bro. But oh, come on. He goes, oh, you think you took, come here, and he's like, literally, I love that. So it is not end. It is not ending.

Everyone's looking around. He's refusing to leave. Yeah. He's like, now I told you, I'm not leaving without my money. And now I get up. And now I'm at the teller. And the woman behind it is a, it's a young lady, probably our age, and she chuckles, right? Because it's one of those situations. She hits a laugh. So to make her feel less awkward, I laugh with her. I go, yeah. He goes, who's laughing? And I said, oh, I said, here we go. He said, oh, see, you motherfuck think it's funny.

I'll beat everybody's in this bank. I will beat your. And so at this point, I'm like, I'm weighing the pros and cons. I go, oh, man, I go, I think I have to look at it. Yeah, you have to.

You got to see this. As a man, I have to look at it. It's like looking at a car crash. God forbid, you got to look. He goes, yeah,

you too! He said, I'll beat your... She doesn't find me my money. I don't care. She can grab it out of old so I need my money. I'll beat your ass.

And I just went, okay, okay. And I go back to him, he goes, you think I'm playing. And I was like, this old guy's going to put hands up. Yeah.

This is not going to end well. I don't know what to do. What do you do in that situation? I cannot fight him back. He's 70s. And you're a little scared. And he physically, oh, I'm not scared.

You're a little scared. You're a much racing a little bit. I'm not scared in the slagish. You're just a little scared. I'm not scared in the slag. You're a little scared. Payton, when you see this man,

I can just hear him. Oh. I know what he looks like. Oh, but I took a picture of him too. I'm going to show you off camera. He is the least scary man ever. But I know you. You're a bitch.

Wow. Wow. and I'm sitting there, I'm just like, yeah, I'm like, I don't know what to do if this guy comes up to me. Then first off, I was like, they're not going to let it happen. No.

And he just goes, yeah, that's what I thought. And I was like, I'm just having to take that. He got you. He got my money and I start to walk out. He goes, now how to fuck you give him his money? He goes, he did the set. Oh, I'm about to feel you. He said that.

And I said, yeah, I have a good day. And I walked out. It was so funny, dude. I need you to look at it. Yeah, I need a reaction to the, I need to see this guy's picture. Because I have, I'm imagining Uncle Ruckus. Yeah, it's not far off.

Oh. Oh, no, he's a little, he's a little, yeah. He's got a hole in his head. Yeah, he does. That's a lobody. My grandpa got a lobotomy. You know that, right? Is he missing a nub?

No, he's just missing some. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay. God bless me, he's going through it. Yeah, yeah. I think you ignored what I just said. Your grandpa was missing a nub? No, no.

Oh, lobot. My grandpa got a lobotomy. because he was left-handed and black. He was like 13 or something. Yeah. It was tough for our people back of the day. You got to like a, you know how crazy that is?

They're like, oh, you're black and left-handed. We got to drill into your skull. Like, that's crazy. R-R-P. That is absolutely insane.

That's crazy. And I was not laughing at the circumstances or the telling history. What were you laughing at then? It was just a funny, there's something in my head. Oh, what's funny? No, it was a joke in my head I was going through.

Oh, say it. It's like a lot. inside joke you're not in the circle it's inside you wouldn't understand it's fine you don't understand just say it unless because somebody might get in oh okay lobotomy no something kind of similar to me happened i was at a cvs um this is very local to the people that are listening to this and don't understand i was in uh i was in grapevine which is far from where i am at right so just out there for something and i went to a cvs okay and so i was in there i was looking at uh toys because i'm a 27 year old man that goes to grapevine tvs look for toys it's like an hour out for me

I, can I just say one time for the record real quick, you can go back to it. I really do sometimes hate you. Why? Why? In a CVS for toys. I mean, you want to talk about- I went there for something else, but I've stumbled upon the toy. Oh, plan B.

Okay, gotcha. Oh, 5598. Charge right to that debit card. Oh, I got you now. No, no, no, no, no. Okay, they sell morning after pills at 7-Eleven. It's literally called 7-Eleven morning after pills. Now, if you get that, you might as well.

I was about to say something crazy You're at CVS and Grapey Yeah And this guy He kind of looked like An older version of the guy That hid pickles under his tongue From SpongeBob

Built the same exact way Like triangular and flat And just goes walking past me And he goes Hey man And I go Hello And he goes

You from Grapevine And I go No I actually live in X town about an hour away He goes yeah But he goes Do you know the restaurant down here right down here and I go nope and he goes they just built it it's a brewery

they goes he got shut down it just opened up two months ago and I go oh I wonder why that is and he goes they have a hard time keeping restaurants in there and he gave me a 26 year history of that building no he did not a 26 year history about that building and I literally like mm-hmm mm-hmm oh you're definitely doing this oh no yeah oh oh oh oh oh oh oh After 12 seconds, I didn't make eye contact. And then so I think he realized he was running out of breath and I was running out of patience. And so he left and went to a different aisle. And you know what I heard him say?

Hey, you from Grapevine? Oh, God. To a different person. I heard, hey, you from Grapevine three different times. Hey, you from Grapevine? I hate people that talk to me in public. Like, you know what I'm saying? And I kind of hate you for that, too.

You do that too. What? I hate people that strike up random conversations with strangers. Why? First off, I don't strike up. Yeah, you do. No, I don't. Yeah, you do.

No, I don't. You did it literally yesterday. That's because they inquired about us. If the conversation is already, striking up the conversation, it's starting it. You've never struck up a conversation. Oh, yeah. I've done that, yeah. But what do you gain from that?

It's just human interaction, bro. Life is beautiful. I don't yearn for human interaction. Open your eyes and life is beautiful. Why do you yearn for human interaction? Because I'm a human being. I'm an urban. Love is amazing.

Do you gain, do you have a thing that comes after that? What does that mean? Like, do you, what does that mean? I don't have a thing that comes after that.

Do you have a fulfillment that comes after, uh, no, it's not like I'm getting off to it or I'm like, I'm putting up shots. So,

so literally you gain nothing from it, but you still choose to do it. We gain nothing from watching Netflix. No, I gained a lot. I've entertainment, fun. Like I,

there's never, like, can I honestly say this? And this might be just like a, a different type of people type of thing. I've never been in public and saw a stranger be like, I want to talk to that person. I don't think I've ever done

that. I don't think I've ever seen someone to be like, I need to talk to them. But if a shoulder bumps, if a hey, are you from the pot? No, no, different. No, I'm saying you striking it up. No, I don't think I've, I, now I genuinely can say, unless it is someone like of fame

that I like, I like an athlete, an actor, something like that. And that's just to say, hey, love you, always have, always will. But a regular, like a normal person, and me a normal person, I've never been like, I need to talk to that guy. Yeah, but have you? No, never. Really?

Okay, good. So shoulder bumping and then starting to talk? Yes. That's still the same thing to me. What do you, what do we have to talk? How do you, I don't know how to strike up a conversation in public. That's just, it's just easy. Can you try?

Because I don't understand how to do it. Like, it's so easy. You're overthinking already. Yes. Okay. So give me a circumstance situation and the type of person. And I'll try to strike up a conversation with him, because I don't know how to strike up conversation. Okay.

This is an athletic guy like us, but he's 10 years older. Okay. Okay. Okay. His kids are probably already maybe seven, something like that. Wow. Okay. You're at a bar and you're waiting in a line.

Yeah. For a drink. Okay. Someone's trying to walk past you. You move for them. You accidentally bump that guy. He turns around. If you went, that'd be the worst.

That guy's like, what the fuck? Okay, I'll try it. So, yeah. Oh, no. No, no problem. My bad, bro. Bump. No, it's all good, man.

Bro, Jay Uso, big WWE guy? Yep. I love WWE. Do you really? I thought I was starting the conversation, so. I thought you were too. See, you're such a yabber. You're still, okay, okay.

Well, then you have to bump me. That's what it was. Oh, that one talked to you. If I bump somebody and they don't turn around or they do they turn around. Oh, so bump me, ready? Oh, bam. That's your bump. Bam?

BAM. What is is a comic book? That's your bump? What do I say? What do I say on a bump? Oof. Oof. What's up, dog?

Did you bump me, bro? What's up, dog? Off of a bump? This is a frat house? Yes, okay. Moving bricks? No. What's up?

Oh, sorry, bro. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. What if I'm not a sorry about it? Sorry. It was an accident. It was an accident.

Then you're an accident. You're an accident. Do you want to be perceived as an accident? That was like the first thing that I got like derogatory thing that got told to me in elementary school and it stuck with me for a long time. You know that I was an accident. Somebody's like, oh, you're an accident. then weren't you? And I go, that's possible. Oh. I go, what?

And so I went home. I know, I went home and I had a full-on conversation. I got a little too much information out of that conversation about my conception. The third grade, I got to call the lesbian in the third grade. You could pass. Back to the bump. Okay. Here we go. Right here. Yep.

Bump me. Oh. What's that? They're flying here? What was that? I literally go, what the fuck you do? Okay, let's go. Bump.

You don't have to hit me. Just go oof. Oof. Whoa. That's what you do. You're hitting me. No, just say sorry. Say sorry.

Like a normal. Sorry. Oh my God. I saw that on TikTok. What you just said. I saw that. This episode is brought to you by Shopify and let me tell you something. I've been there before.

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That's right. Start your free trial at Shopify.com slash YSK. That's Shopify.com slash YSK. Now on to the rest of the episode. What is happening? I saw that on TikTok. What you just said? You saw what on TikTok.

Somebody brought this up and I want to ask you and I've been meaning to ask you. I've been meaning to ask you. You're hopeless. Let's go. Okay. You know whenever you're teaching your kid how to say words and you're like, say baby or say hi. Yeah. How do they know just to say hi or just to say baby and they don't say say?

I saw that on TikTok. Isn't that a fantastic question, dude? How do they know? I think that's a. a good question. I'll give you, I'll give your kudos off the back. I didn't think of it, but the logic behind it, I think it's just, I don't know, I think it's got to be one of those natural filler words that doesn't mean anything and they understand. So it's, it's like training. Okay. It's like training a dog, right? Right. You could say sit. Ruby, sit. If she does a twirl or whatever, you're not,

she doesn't get any applause until she says, so she sits. If my, if I'm training a dog to sit and they do a twirl, that's more accomplishment. I'm not correcting that. You're the worst trainer ever then. You're training to sit. That's like if I say, okay, you're into a tween cross. And the guy goes, tween and pulls up and shoots. No, that's like, it's like, hey, I'm teaching you how to make a layup, right?

I'm teaching a kid out to make a layup, and then he just pulls from three and he hits it. I'm not correcting you. That's way more impressive. Terrible coach. Really? You're teaching him a layup. So do a layup. Like, if I teach my kid English and he just starts speaking Spanish, I'm not going to correct him.

That's wrong. No, it's not. That is wrong. That's incredibly wrong. That's more impressive than him. Hey, we're going to go do math, and he's like, but biology is the molecular code of the universe. And I go, you can do whatever you want.

I think that's the right way to parent. That is terrible. Are you sure about that? Yes, because then when you say, hey, I want you to sit in that corner for two minutes, and he goes, I want to stand outside for four. That's the same. And then you go, that is cooler.

All right. You go, Sarah, where's my sandwich? I can see you being that dad. Where's my fear? Sarah! Oh my God, Caitlin Clark's still playing. Sarah,

is our kids still out in the yard? Sarah, that'd be you. Back to the language. It's the same thing. If I tell you, hey, say banana. You go banana,

and I go, ah, banana, I've never applauded you on the word say. There's no, but I don't think a kid has ever just not said banana.

You know what I mean? Like, there's not a kid that will just go say, say. Exactly. If you say- But why do they not though? Because- Off of instinct. I think that's a big part. I think the training method's a big part of it. And the instinct, I don't, I can't speak to the-

How on the first time- It's a filler. It's a filler way. But how on the first time are they not saying say? Because also you're, oh my God, this, I mean, if there's any proof of the pudding that you don't have kids, it's this. You think you're looking at a kid every time going, say banana, say banana. That is not what you do in the slightest. That's actually what I've seen you do. No, no. You're out of your mind. When the kids first start to speak,

you literally are like this. You're like, n, n, n, n. You say that? Nna. You go like syllable by syllable. That's where your kid's behind. But my kid is a head of many.

Actually, my kid is a genius. My kid is a beautiful little curly-headed. Oh, you've turned into that, Barry. Oh, dude, I will be. But that's, you teach them word by word.

Say becomes just filler. Filler, filer bustard. Legal jargons. Say. Yeah. No one needs to know the purpose. But isn't that crazy though? That is because I'm the first.

instant you would think they would go, if you go say banana, they go, all right, say banana. Like that's what they should do inherently, but they don't. Actually, I disagree. Why? Because say is, say is the word. Every time you say, I'm trying to say. Say is the word that is giving the action for you to then say something else. Correct, but that's a very advanced way of thinking. A kid doesn't know words. But he also doesn't know that say is its own word. Exactly. But how is he not saying say though, but he is saying banana? How is he just, his brain is cutting off the say part. Because, oh my God, dude, actually disagrees. Because say is not, it's not a, like say say, uh, I don't know if there is another

parallel. There has to be, but this is incredible. Exactly. It's a really good. You're trying to argue with me, but it is. I think it's terrible. But there's no counterpoint. You can't say anything to what I'm saying. Because say is not, say is telling you, I hate that I have to say again, say is telling you to, it's an action word. To let loose the next word. Right. Of what I, know, I know what it is. Why are you telling me that? I know that. I'm not sure you do. I know that. I'm saying kids don't know that. We're going in a circle, but the kids do not know that and the fact that they don't know that and they're still not saying it is the most impressive thing ever. That is unique. It's so impressive. I met a woman named unique earlier today.

Really? Her name was unique. And I said, I love that. Did you know you can't just give your kid any name you want? The hell I can't. No, you can't. Like, if you were to go, like, judges won't sign off on that. Birth certificates. We're taking birth certificate to judges now?

Don't you have to take your- Where is this, Mori? Don't you have to take your birth certificate to the judge for him to approve the name? Is that not a thing? Peyton, Stephen Harden, you think parents are leaving the hospital. in taking a piece of paper to the district attorney

and having him sign off on your name selection. Well, you couldn't mail it, I'm sure. But you actually believe that it goes to the courthouse. I thought you had to. In person. How did they get a social security number? Through the judge. I thought you had to get it approved by a judge.

I... How do you get your name? You write whatever you want. Yeah, but it has to get approved. No, there's not a higher counsel. You can't name your kid like a slur. You cannot do that. You probably could.

No, you cannot. Says who? Is there legal bindings? Yes, the judge. The judge is not in this equation. No one's taking. No, you're honestly like, this is mind-blowing that you don't have to get your name approved. Could you imagine?

It's your name! Yeah, but- What are you the- dog-jew? So why have you- Dog judge? You know a dog courthouse to name your dog, Brian? No, it's different.

They're not humans. But why do you not, so why is there not somebody out here? You know, there's hateful, like really hateful people out there, like really hateful. Really bad people. And exactly, that really hate certain types of people. Why would they not name their kid like the slur against that type of people? That would happen. But you've never met somebody whose name was like a bad word because you cannot do it.

It's illegal. Okay. There might be stipulations to that extent. Exactly. But who's the one? approving or disapproving. The judge. It's not the, if you say that,

if you say parents take a first certificate to the judge one more time, I'm going to blow a casket. I'm going to blow a gasket. I'm going to blow a gasket. The judge is not signing for a bit. Payton, you do all of it in the hospital. And then it just gets mailed to you. That's it.

Wait, what gets mailed to you? I zoned out. You fill out the forms. What form? Do you, okay. I'm not even trying to rage bait or troll. Do you think this is like, a word of mouth game. I think it's telephone. You go, hey, Judge, he's a little light complexion.

I was thinking Steve. But what do you think? No, no. That's fine. Regular names. You write it down approval. Yes. And then the hospital does whatever they have to do. And then they get it done and sent to the government. The judge. That's the part of the government. The judicial system. Legislative, executive, and disciplinary. You're kidding. legislative and what was the second? Executive. Executive. Executive.

Executive David. Executive David. Pentecostal. Judicial, executive. Legislative. Legislative. And the judge is, and those are three, those three things make the government, right? And so you said you got to send it to the government.

Well, guess who the f***ed in the government? The judge. They don't send it to the judge for him to sign off. They send that simply for them to get the Social Security. Exactly. And so you don't think if they, if their name was, the inward they would be, the judge would be like, no, you can't do that.

You're not getting a social security number. Oh, or whoever's in the office. Oh my God. The judge. The judge isn't seeing these. Ah, he's not seeing the papers. Okay, I want to look up.

Oh, I went lightheaded. Oh, I'm seeing stars. David helped me. Oh. I want to look up the craziest recorded names in history. There we go. That's a good one. Okay.

Hold on. I'm going to look up too so we can both hit. Okay, here we go. Oh wow. Okay, well, okay. Oh, I can't, I can't say. Here we go. Oh, my hands in a lot of pain.

Captain Bigot, an 18th century French naval officer, all right? Then you get Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster. Kim, Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster, a real US Army computer technician who went viral in the late 2000s for having the most Out of here! Your name's Sergeant-Lutative Fightmaster Fighter!

And you work on computers and tech! Then we got Dr. John Coleman Flood, a doctor who, fittingly, specialized in urology. Dude, oh, wow. Oh my God, keep going. And then, oh, wow, this is a hell of a name. Batman Ben Superman. And you think of Judge. Oh, that's great. He was a Singaporean man whose ID card went viral in 2008.

His name literally translate from Javanese as Batman, son of Superman. Then we have Dr. Duncan Fearnley, a surgeon who actually, that's not even a cool name. Now, this guy, it's an Indian man. Born, his first name holds a 2012 record for the longest single name in census documentation, named after ancient Hindu text. So be respectful here. I'm going to spell this. No, no, you can't.

No, yeah, you can. I want you to try to say it first. I don't want this to be disrespectful. It's like somebody sneezed and hit a keyboard. And just try and try. I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but that's how it looks. This is a real name. Say it.

Just give your best. Give your best job. Brahada. CJ, put this on the screen. Brahada Arni-Yakopanish. punish out of V-V-V-E-V-A-C-H-A-K-U-A-N-I-A-N-I-A-N-I-H-A-R-H-A-A-R-A-N-I-E-R-A-R-A-N-E-R-A-N-E-R-A. No, that's no, that's fine. I'm not laughing at the Hindus or their text, but I'm laughing at that is, that had to have been 40 letters. Yes. Do you want more names? I got some better ones.

keep going. Fly fornication. I'm going to name my kid. I'm going to name my kid Nut. Nut Kennedy. The next one that comes out. Hey, come here, Nut. I'm going to do it two ins too, so you have to say like that.

Nut. 1596. That's his fucking name? I thought his name was. This guy was in 1596, so I'm not sure he was real. But this is his name. If Christ had not died for thee thou

had's been bared bone, an English leather merchant. but his friends just called him Nicholas What is his name? If Christ had not died for thee thou Thaken Thorsiv? If Christ had not died for thee thou hadst been dead

Barebone And his friends called him Nicholas Called a Nicholas And he worked But his brother's His brother's legal name was Jesus Christ Came into the world

To save Bearbone Who is Bearbone? That's the last name. That's God Oh that's her last name Oh my God That's so funny That website was

absolutely fantastic. I wanted to, can I tell you the name I like really wanted to name my daughter one day? Go for it. Crystal. Crystal or I know, but they're people are like, exactly, which is fine. Heavy. Some of the best people I met in my life are strippers. Like, I've had the best conversations with the strippers in my life. I've never been to strip club. You need to experience one. We don't need to. Oh, I heard the chicken wings are good. Oh, I've never eaten. That's what. weird. Oh, you don't eat it there? No, I've seen stuff fly off before. It has been the only you go to. I've been like some really luxury ones and some real like, oh, no one knows this exists. If I saw a pubic misfire hit a chicken wing, it's not pubic. What's flying off?

I can't say that on the internet. Okay, it wasn't lice, but let me tell you. It was the lice of the bottom region. They had a dancer up there, butt naked. Not butt. Not but. Oh, well, I've never been. You can clearly tell. They had a dancer up there. No. With her yiddies out. Yeah.

And a crab flew out. Couldn't tell you. I'm not a doctor or a urologist. But I would say, but I would say, something came back positive that night. If something, oh, dude, you talk about the jitters of the stomach. Yeah. Talk to me.

What were you going to tell me? I was going to read a couple of these names. Yeah, read me some names. A. A. Miracle. Ah, miracle. A-H. Miracle.

I feel like I met somebody like that. Really? Someone's legal name was baby girl. Let me see you dance. Let me see you twirl. Brittany Shakira Beyonce. Her mom. Your parents suck.

Your parents sucks. Yeah, your parents sucks. Why is it just the mom? A couple more. That's sexes. The dad could have named. That's very true. And I take that back.

Love child, Ermagird. Love child, Irmigurd. Love child. Beberle. That's a terrible name. Beberley. Someone was... Okay.

And then we're going to end here. Okay. He's next two. Come on, tell me. A, B, C, D.E. That's my nabdga. The best part is you said it's so good, Aptica. And then the last one.

Little Sweet Meat. Now, I want to say this, and I'm going to say this without suttering and without blinking. Here we go. Lisa Kennedy, if you had the gall and the nerve to name me, my legal government name was Little Sweet Meat. this, I blinked, the second I turned 18 years old, I would have removed you from my existence in my life. That's where you have to go to get the judge.

That makes sense. What? That's where you have to go to the judge. I was getting it confused. It's not your God-given birth name. It's not God-given. It's to change the name. It's the change the name.

You're still not going. You have to go to the judge for that. Yes, you do. Please look it up. You have to go to the judge for, something with your name. Do you have to go to the judge? Do you have to go to the judge to change your name? Let's see what it says. I'm telling you you have to. Oh, wow. Yeah. I thank you. Yes. You usually have to go to a judge to change your name unless you change it through marriage or divorce.

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Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. Okay, I have a question for you, and I feel like you might disagree with me. Okay. I had this conversation with my girlfriend because, you know, we're getting serious. You know, as the time, you know, one day maybe we want kids. And so I'm talking about child names with my, like, we're just going through it. You know that fun.

What do you want to name the kid? Oh, yeah. Is it weird to name your kid after a celebrity that's still alive? Absolutely. Really? I would never name my kid after a celebrity. In general. In general.

You're wrong. I wanted to name my kid Prince. Prince Michael Jackson. Okay, okay. Just Prince, decent. I retracted my statement. If you genuinely like a name, you genuinely like a name, and then you like that person and it just kind of match made in heaven, that's fine.

Yeah. If your sole intention is to name your offspring after another human being, that is wrong. Yeah. That is wrong. No, it's not. Like, oh my God, Reggie Bush was the greatest collegiate running back. I loved his time of the Saints. I'm naming my son Reggie. Yes, he was in college hitting Kim Kay. And he got a Rose Bowl. Are you crazy? Or he went to the Rose Bowl. Are you crazy? He is crazy. He was in college. He was in college. He was in college. He was in college with Kim Kay. Like, yeah, I'm going to name my kid, Reggie Bush. I'm going to name my kid, Reggie Bush. And so I was going to name my kid Prince M.J. Hardin. Like, that's, are you kidding me? Two music legends. One with the A little controversial middle ground, but I don't believe in it. I don't believe that he did that.

That's fine if you don't. But let's say your kid just ends up being like, I don't know, a pool guard. What's fine? He's going to be the sickest named pool guard you've ever met. He's going to be like, get out. He's going to be sitting there like this. He's going to running. He doesn't turn into Michael, bro.

So you think it's weird in 20? In 2026, if somebody's kids named LeBron James. Fuck you. Yes, that's weird. That's the greatest basketball player to ever exist. Why is that weird? And there's two things. One, you're never gonna be him.

And two, what happens when your kid doesn't even like the sport? It has nothing to do with this. It has nothing to do with them. What happens when he's filing taxes for Quickbooks? It has nothing to do with him. And he goes, hey, nice to meet you, Janet. I'm LeBron James Johnson. I'm here to do your taxes.

Oh, you're named after a legend. Yeah, and I'm not. So you're saying I'm weird because I'm named after Walter Payton. RIPP. But your mom didn't name you, Walter Payton Hardin. Peter Payton Harden. But that would be sick. No, it wouldn't.

Why? If your mom named you Walter Payton, like, what was my caveat at the beginning? Yes. If there's inspiration, she likes the name, and it's because someone, perfect. And she named you the back end of it. That's fine.

That's like incognito. That's like, oh, let's do Walter Payton, but incognito. That's what I'm saying. Okay, but can I defend myself more? I think, Hardin. You got to mute that name. If you...

Got to mute that name, CJ. If they named you that, think about that. I'd go to the judge. Yeah, you would. But let me say, that's weird. That's, no, bro, that's weird. I think it's, I'm going to get that big pimble again from wearing this hat. This is where I got that big pimble that lasted six months and I wear that star.

Ooh, I, you see one? Yeah, I know, it's from this hat so dirty. Really? Yeah. Wash the hat. Or give it to me. Can I fit that? Try it.

Wait, can I say something first? Yeah, go. Oh, okay. I think it's weirder to name a kid after yourself rather than naming your kid after a big celebrity. Like, if you were to name your next kid, LeBron James, that would make more sense to me than you naming your kid Cam Kennedy the second. You deserve to be slapped. You're less important than LeBron.

I hate to break it to you. But I'm so much more important to my kid than LeBron is to my kid. I'm his father. He's half of me. So? Half of me created his life. LeBron entertained it. My kid's not even going to know LeBron if it wasn't for me.

But you're less important. It's cooler. It is much more of an honor for your kid to be named LeBron than Cameron Kennedy. No, it is not. Oh, you're insane. Oh, you have a lot of confidence. First off, no, how do you think life worked back then? What do you mean?

Back in the day. I know you don't believe in all that, but history. If you were a king or a conqueror, you gave your son the same name. That's how you have Constantine an eighth. I don't know about that. And St. Regis the 14th and all these people. Yeah, that's why their ears are on their forehead, though. So they also do on other stuff.

Okay, you know what? We're going to agree to disagree. I love where we're on right now, though. What are some normal things? Okay. Normal things that people do that you instantly like hate. Like you can't stand, drives you crazy, or you immediately look at them different. Oh, I have some, immediately.

Immediately I have some too. Okay, do you want to go first or me go first? I'll go first. You go first. It's weird that you brought up a question and then you answer your first. No, it's weird. No, fuck me. Sorry.

No, it's actually the strangest thing you could ever do. Bro, how was your day? But before you answer, I'm going to tell you about mine. That's such a strange thing to do. I redact and I'm sorry. Sorry, I apologize. You would have been redacted, too. I apologize.

I could see you being redacted. We get those unredacted files. You know, I tried to find them? I went searching one night. That's so, I mean, it's good to be informed on things. It's good to be informed. But also like... But that was my first time ever, like a huge, like, nationwide, global, honestly, case that was like...

I don't think we should talk about this. Probably not. I didn't realize you could just go to the website and there was a lot of stuff. But, I mean, two minutes in, I was like, oh, I'm not, I'm not Dexter or a lawyer. I don't know what I'm looking at me. And at the end of it, what's going to happen? Yeah, nothing. And I was like, I'm going to go to bed.

Yeah, but. So, normal things that people do that immediately make you look at them different. Immediately, people that eat anything in the movie theater other than popcorn are weird. Okay, time out. Now, this is not how this was supposed to go. What? That's literally me. You're saying if I eat, if you eat any, don't you look at my hips and do that.

So you're saying if anybody eats anything besides popcorn. I think even- So when I go, I get a hot dog and a drink and popcorn. I'm weird. Weird. There's no movie theater etiquette anymore, and, like, I know y'all be doing whatever. Like, I'm not even talking about the people that bring in to go boxes, and obviously, those people are the scum of the earth. Like, you're going to hell.

Like, go tell me how, like, go say what's up to Baffamette. Like, I don't, eating tilapia. Yeah. I'm trying to watch Tom Holland. Oh, it's crazy. I should, you should, you should get evicted from the theater. Oh, my God. You should, no, you should get arrested.

But, like, people that take candy into the movie theater. I do that every time. That's so weird to me. That's not weird. The movie theater is, it. It is synonymous with popcorn in a large beverage. That's all you get. Don't even drink alcohol in there.

No, no, no, no. People that get sloshed to go watch the movie. I've never understood that either. Oh, I started to because I have a problem. But why do they have candy? Why do they have hot dog? Why do they have nachos at the movie? Because gluttony.

It's easy to fund sin. Too shay. Because people know, they know people will buy it. That's the same food they have in a football game. It's entertainment. That's different. No, it's not. Football game, you're supposed to eat beer, drink hot dogs.

Oh. There's nothing wrong. I get a large popcorn and probably a hot dog. Yeah, you do. And then a peanut butter, like a peanut butter, M&M, and then like a big bottle of water. And that's what I get. You drink water at a movie theater?

I only drink water. It's a palate cleanser, and I don't like the coax. I don't know. You're one of those people that will eat like shit and be like, oh, regular coax, disgusting. I cannot do that. I know I just had a big mac, a double quarter pound or large fries and cheese curds.

Do not give me a soda. That is absolutely me. That is. Dr. Dr. I drink water at a movie theater is criminal. I drink water at most places. The only time I get Diet Coke is when I'm around y'all. To be cool or like what?

I guess to fit in, yeah, feel wanted. You're getting small. Like this. It's your state. It's your mic's down. For me, immediately, if you sleep with your doors open, I don't trust you worth up. If you sleep with your doors open, I don't want to hang out with you.

I don't want to be your friend. I do not trust you. You will not touch my children and you're not welcome in my home. If you sleep with your doors open. people that sleep with their doors open, like they either know Taekwondo or they have a lot of machinery that could hurt you. Not not even, I don't even think it's a macho, macho thing. But they fear nothing. Oh no, I think it's, I think it's like a detachment. I think they think they're cool. It's like listening to the ultra, ultra underground guy just to say you do it.

I used to like, dude, I sleep in my doors open. I used to sleep with me that vibe. I used to sleep with my doors open like when I was growing up, but that's just because I didn't want to be filled caged. Why my spirit needed to be, have an outlet. I felt like my dreams would bounce off the walls and turn into nightmares. They'd have to escape. I used to have a dream catcher hanging from my ceiling fan. Really? I think that's sacrilegious.

I think that's a little homerotic. Oh, dude. Oh, it was. Yeah. Oh, it was. It was pretty, too. It was a good dream catcher. If you sleep in the doors open, that's my friend.

Can I say I love bisexual people? Like, I found that out about myself. Like, they're the coolest people. I don't know if that's offensive to say. No. I've had a lot of cool. Like, I don't think I've met a bisexual. sexual person I didn't like.

Honestly. Yeah, they're all pretty sick. They are. I think it's an open-mindedness. I mean, just very, it's like a big plate of ginger. Like, it just clears your palettes. We went to a WNBA game, and I felt at home. Oh, hell yeah.

Oh, yeah. I mean, those are, that was because of my cousins. Now, definitely some twisted branches in the tree because we just don't share the same ethnicity in the slightest. But they were fantastic people. Fantastic human beings. And they gave me a challenge. He gave you a challenge too.

You were a little zoned out at that point. You went to old trustee. I hated that. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. I hated that. I told your wife about that. I hate when you talk through me.

I hate it, dude. Because Cam always wants to talk to strangers, bro. And it's never the stranger sitting next to him. It's always the stranger sitting next to me. Oh, yeah. And so it's like this. I got two beaks in front of me like this talking. And he'll go like this.

You go, yeah, I'm out. I'm going to switch seats? What else do you hate? No, it's your turn. It's your turn. I said, what do you hate? You said, I love bisexual people. So there you go.

What's the thing? A normal thing, when people only listen to music in their cars, people that can't consume radio, like talking radio or podcast, you're weird. Oh, okay, okay, okay. If you didn't say podcasts or for me, like clips and social media. Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't do that. I hear you. I hate that.

You're talking about only music. I'm on. People that only listen to music in cars are weird. Yeah, it's like, what do you do on a four-hour road trip? Like, how many albums can you go through? I, oh, people that listen to music in the morning. Okay, hold on. If you listen to music in the morning, you're weird.

If it's certain genres. If you listen to rap in the morning, you're going to hell. I've had fair shares. I'm sorry. I mean, 7.15 in the morning. I'm driving up here to drill music. You can only listen to R&B jazz, like, gospel. Gospel.

That's reserved for anything before noon. Oh, that's all before noon. Anything afternoon, you can do him. pop rock pop lock drop two throw you know whatever you want i'm not gonna live listen i listen to like murder music at like eight a m dude that's crazy and sometimes it gets me going people that i listen to like an NBA young world a PS5 like that's the vibe you're getting you stand up in front of your tv like that's the vibe you're getting yeah that's that's weird bro like you have two you

your brain is too unoccupied if you're listening to rap that early in the morning yeah dude the silence the echoes of silence scares me something It's fantastic. I mean, it's fantastic. But you have to, like, that's not good for your central nervous system. It cannot be. It can't be.

And I have something else that's not good for your central nervous system. My second one, people that need to go to the bathroom, very, very bad, specifically, number two, but they refuse to do it in public. That's a direct shot.

It is. And the shoe fits where... I look awful. Welcome, welcome Cinderella. I just saw myself. Sorry. Welcome, Cinderella. You are a man that I have physically...

Think about this. We've had to deep. We tour our day for you to go to your house to poop when we have been in places that have toilets and locked doors. Yeah, we'll have like an event that's an hour away and we'll go back home because I have to take poop. That is that is the most. That is like secondhand like the greatest selfish feat that someone can accomplish. You don't have to go with me, but you rode with me. I don't.

Yeah, I'm literally in your car. Yeah. But I, yeah, it's not, I think I'm the most, I think that's a cleanly thing. And I think people that poop publicly lack cleanliness or respect for this. themselves. That's not. And I have shy bowel syndrome. I cannot do it. I do not like people hearing me toot or smelling my insides. I cannot. Oh my God. That can be my third. If you're so, if you are such a shy bowel syndrome person to where you're audibly playing videos or music on the toilet when you're in a public restroom, I also hate you. I do that with my girlfriend. Like she'll be getting ready like

because I'm a nighttime. She says, oh, is it my nighttime duda? And I go, yeah. And I like try into the bathroom. She knows when I'm about the poop. And I'll turn my. It. She knows I'll turn my TikToks up as loud as I can and I'll put them like on the door and like go like this just so she doesn't hear me fart and hear it drop. I hate people hearing my inside. That's so vulnerable for me. It's like people hearing my literally my insights coming out of me and hearing my my dirt start making noises. Are you crazy? That's personal.

Two nights ago I got up out of my bed and I said, live I got a shit pulled my pants down, bent over, spread my farted with it pointed toward her. Then went to the bathroom. You won't let her see your flaccid Johnson? No, that's more of it. She sees it. I mean, I just don't want to sit there and lay on the bed. Display. Yeah, I don't want to put it on a shelf.

It's a small shelf. Another thing that, like, made me realize I'm not as close to my girlfriend as I thought I was. So we shower. Like, I shower right. Performative. No, no, we don't show. Oh, my God, a couple showers performative. No, I don't do that.

I hate that. Get out of air. We've never done that. We never will. I'm in the shower, right? And so my shower is like a big glass cage. It's huge. Yeah, it's massive.

Just kidding. I rent it. It's not really mine. So I'm in the shower right and I can see her side of the bathroom and she's like getting ready. She's so cute. She has her thing on and doing her. It's like 15 steps. I go to bed. Oh, you know what I mean? I hate that. Oh, we'll get to that. We'll get to that. And so I'm showering, right? I'm doing my thing.

And I like to write her notes on the glass. I'll be like, babe. What is that? You said I'm doing my thing. And so I'll write a note on the glass. I'll be like, babe, a new note just entered the villa and she'll turn around and she'll edit. It's cute just to read it and stuff, and I'll wipe it off. And I'll go turn around for the next one. And so we'll play that game.

I never really get a good wash. I'm just writing notes the whole time. And so anyway, I got out of the shower right, and I'm drying off. And I turn away from her because I realize I don't like to dry myself in front of my girlfriend. I hate it. I never dry myself in front of him. I literally, I'll go like this, bro. I'm drying.

Yeah. And then like, when she turns around, that's what I'm like, yes, yes, yes, yes. Bro. It's so weird. So, but I was talking to her. I was having an in-depth conversation. We're nuzz to nuzz, right? So we get in each other's face and all I could see is like her eyes,

but I backed up a little bit because I was like stumbling trying to dry my legs, right? And so then I went up under my man, right? Yeah, I had, it was all three, right? It was, it was a trifecta, two balls and a penis. Yeah, it was all of them. So I scooped under it with the towel and they were, so it was all hidden. It was all pointed at our God, right? It was all looking up.

God! Right? And she, she like just, you guess it's a lot. So she immediately just looked down and saw, and she goes, whoa. She goes, I've never seen it like that because it was pointed up, and I got so embarrassed. Like, and I hit my chest, so she was like, wow. And she was like, it was in me. I want to be the very best.

No one if it was. Can I see your stroke? No, no. Kemp, stop. No, not here. Not here. Not here. Not here.

No, after we hit the record button. What? If I looked up there and that wasn't recording You'd have to kill me Hey, you'd absolutely have to hit me I'm not gonna lie, there wouldn't be an episode And I love y'all, that, I could live with that I could live with that

I could live with that I can't, no, I can't, no But there's something else I want to talk to you about Talk to me, Daddy I never got to try on the hat, let me try on that hat Let me try on that hat Ow! This episode is brought to you by Cash App

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Suddened Flex card, and Bank Corp, Debt Flex card, CashUp, Debt Flex card, cash up, direct deposit, roundups, overdraft coverage, and discounts provided by Cash App, A Block, Inc. brand. Visit cach dot app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosure. Now on to the rest of the episode. That has been through so much, bro. Pee. It's bad. Look, I... It smells like a garage sale. Yesterday was the first day I've worn it in years and I already have two people.

I don't know if I want to try it. You're gonna get broken out and you're and you just got a haircut dude. You're gonna get you're gonna get bumps. That's crabs. I look like a good boy. You look like you look like a 1950s milkman. Isn't that crazy? This had a zero integrity by the way.

Like this is supposed to be so much stronger than it is. Look, it's a flopping in the wind. What are we gonna title this episode? Oh, well no, there was something. There was something. Hold on there doesn't matter right now. Joe have, what? Let's see the world's craziest names.

I was going to say naming our kid. Yeah, that's hot. Yeah, we're having internal meaning. Can we be honest, break the fourth wall? If people are staying this late, this was filmed a month ago. It was. Because we are taking a week off after Australia. So, this was...

Let's talk about that super quick, super quick, which it's already happened, but... Why? Because this is on the record now, and we can't lie about it. We can't lie. So you have 30 seconds. How do you think Australia is going to go? Not the performance. not the shows, not meeting our fans, our beautiful people.

That's gonna be amazing. I think I'm physically just like being a tourist in Australia. I'm excited. I'm really excited, man. I think, I think, um, I wanna be separated from half the group. I want me and you to have some time. Oh, he loves me. Yeah, you're a good guy. Thanks, man.

You're a good guy. Now, can I be honest? I feel like you just found that out. I feel like you just found out I was a good guy. Why? Why? I feel like you've overlooked my goodness for a long, time. You think so? No, I lost it for a little bit for sure. Lost a little bit for sure.

Yeah, you did. Oh my God. We're breaking barriers. Oh my God. We're breaking it down. What does that mean? Oh, my God. No, I love that. Can I call somebody? Yeah. Just see who I can call. I used to do this when I was drunk, dude. You know one time? Oh my God. Also, by the way I thought, this is a super break the fourth wall. Let us know if we see enough comments, then I will make sure it happens. I think we do a third installment of the D-R-U-N-K-Q-N-A drunk Q&A on the

Kuala royalty coming up soon and if you don't know what that is basically we put out a post on the Kuala Royalty, the top tier about maybe a week prior to the drunk Q&A and you absolutely flood the comment section with all sorts of questions, funny, serious

whatever you want to know and then me and him get together and we drink a lot of little drinks and then we go through and we try to answer every single question. Can I be, I have a story. So let me know if you want that. So I was about to call somebody and Funny Marco's contact popped up in my phone, right? Wow. That was probably the most embarrassing thing ever and I've never told the story. Oh my God. Wait, the night we met him. The night we met him. Right. But he didn't really know us. Like he doesn't know us. I think I

remember. I think I slightly remember. So basically we went to funny Marco was on tour with Bobby Altoff and this is the most embarrassing story ever. We went to the, show because we have the same agents as Bobby Altoff. We went to the show, right? And after the show, we somehow just ended up on stage. I don't know why we went up there. I think it's because our agents said, hey guys, make sure to go meet Bobby. Okay. And then just so we ended up on, we ended up on stage with Bobby Altoff and Funny Marco after the show, right? And they didn't know us. So it was kind of awkward, like, why are we all together, right? And so I started talking to Funny Marko about sketch, the Twitch streamer. Because this was when Sketch,

was first blowing up. Like, he was known, but like, this was whenever his clips were just going viral. And I was like, bro, you got to get with sketch. They were about to go to Houston, and I know sketch is from Houston, so I was like, bro, you got to get with sketch, man. Like, if you bring him out on stage, huge crowd pop, like, it's going to go crazy. And he was like, okay, bad. He was like, tell me about sketch.

And I was telling him about sketch. Then the next day, I'm out, and it's the day of Funny Marco show in Houston. I'm in Dallas. I get a FaceTime from a number that I've never seen before. And so I just hang it up. And then a text that reads Funny Marco. And so I'm like, okay. So I call a FaceTime back and it's Funny Marco answers.

And he goes, hey man, what's up? I got your boy with me. And he turns to sketch and sketch is on the phone. Now I think, what I assumed off of this, because the reaction, when Funny Marco turned the phone towards Sketch, Sketch was thinking that it was gonna be a person he knows on the other end. So sketch went from this, yeah.

Who's that? He said, who's that to me? He said, who's that about me to Funny Marco? That is criminal. And Funny Mark-Wing up. Hung up the phone, I texted Funny Marco at that. He hasn't responded to being like two years. He, funny Marco thought,

that sketch was my friend. And I was plugging it. Oh my God, yeah, you were plugging it. But it was two complete strangers. That's separate entities. You know what embarrassing that is? That's bad, though. That's bad, though.

He said, oh. Who's that? The friend Mark said, oh my dude. And now I like, honest to God, y'all always say like, why is Peyton, he's so, he's so cute, he's so nice. Why does he just talk to people? This is why. Every time I try, bro, something awkward happens.

He has insanely bad, like, it's gravitational at this point. It genuinely. And then we've gone to like DreamCon and stuff and we've stayed in the same hotel as Sketch and we've been like at the bar with him and I'll literally like, he said nice to meet you three years in a row.

Yeah, every time I see him, it's nice to meet you. I'm like, bro, what the f-sketch? Like, we talked 25 minutes straight last year. Yeah, yeah. About the street, like, that was right when, that was like the first year when the TVUs were like about to come out and stuff. Yeah.

We talked, no, we've had like good conversations. And then the next year was like, and I don't know if it was a nice. to meet you but it was definitely you could tell you go hey Kylie yeah he'll say it's like really it's kind of i know you right know we talk for half an hour yeah oh and then i had his oh my god can i show you even oh i'm really about to do docs how embarrassing i am i have sketches and number i think he gave his number oh yeah oh yeah look at one side me and sketches text i used to face i used to just face i got that we're cool bro we talked for like

40 minutes. I would FaceTime him and you just bang it immediately. Oh, oh, Peda. Oh dude. What you want to cook you or something? So Brian, this is going to get clips. So sketched, hey, bro. We know each other man. I'm Payton. Oh, man. I'm Kim, man. And Funny Marko, bro. I hope my numbers are blocked, God. We should do something together. All right, man. Get us out of here, bro. All right, everybody. We absolutely love y'all. Appreciate you coming back. I was 0.236. We love you. Get your good karma. the casuals with this week's secret code. Ooh.

GMM. G.M. Good morning. My. No. Give me my money. I forgot about that. Give me my money.

I beat all y'all's. You too. Oh, you think shit funny. Give me my money. Confuse the casuals. Did you like that out? Let us know. Let us know if you liked the episode.

And let us know if you want to see that drunk Q&A in the comments. You already know. just like getting drunk dude we absolutely love y'all we'll see you in the next one you know we can just do it by the way too like they don't we if we want to do it we can just do it that that is we have that freedom that is true remember wanted to the cold little christmas we'll see it next time wow i want to take one yeah no i was a little scared slightly yeah