You Should Know Podcast - WE ARE GOING TO COURT! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: March 11, 2024

PATREON: Patreon.com/YouShouldknowPodcast FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/people/You-Should-Know-Podcast/61552092953106/ NEW TWITCH CHANNEL: https://m.twitch.tv/peytonhardin/home Peyton’s Polaroids: https://instagram.com/peytonpolaroids?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== TRUE VAULT ESCAPADES: https://youtube.com/@AtomicWolf54 0:00 NEW MERCH? 1:40 CAM JOINS 3:57 Peyton’s & Cams Kid 6:25 Peyton Can’t Raise a Dog 10:53 Cam Smells Worse Than Peyton 13:54 Smelly Showers 16:22 Peyton’s INFECTED Ears! 19:08 Paying For Diseases 23:11 FACTOR MEALS 24:44 Austin Tx Recap 26:50 Cam Forces Peyton to SWIM 29:31 The Doorbell Debate 36:40 Stripping For Each other 38:07 The Bacon Debate 41:35 Switching Clothes 42:43 WE TOUCHED A CORPSE 45:50 Taxidermy vs Buried 47:24 We Lied In Court 50:50 Is Peyton a Chronic Liar? 51:38 Taking a Bull*t for Each other 54:16 Peyton Can’t Say “I love you” 57:06 Old People BIG HAIR 59:16 Cams Dumbest Invention 1:02:13 FITBOD 1:04:46 DR.P (Calling a Patient) 1:13:20 POP CULTURE (UFC & DUNE) 1:17:13 ANNOUNCEMENTS TODAYS SPONSORS: FACTOR MEALS: FactorMeals.com/YSK50 to get 50% OFF Next Order FITBOD: FITBOD.com/YSK TO GET 25% OFF SUBSCRIPTION YouShouldKnow P.O. BOX 191564 2825 Oak Lawn Ave Dallas, Texas 75219 FOLLOW PEYTON: https://instagram.com/psh8?igshid=ZDg1NjBiNjg= JOIN THE DISCORD: https://discord.gg/V5WYhSte2R GRAB SOME MERCH: https://www.youshouldknowstudios.com/shop Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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The new Mitsubishi Outlander brings out another side of you. Your regular side listens to classical music. Your adventurous side rocks out with the dynamic sound Yamaha. Regular you owns a library card. Adventurous you owns the road with super all-wheel control. Regular side, alone time. Adventurous side journeys together with third-row seating. The new Outlander. Bring out your adventurous side.

Mitsubishi Motors. Drive your ambition. The You Should Know Podcast. Oh, we're back! Hey, everybody, welcome back to the You Should Know Podcast. Oh, we're back! Hey, everybody, welcome back to The You Should Know Podcast, episode 103. Round of applause. Please, that rhyme.

Hey, everybody, welcome back to The You Should Know Podcast, episode 103. We are back from Austin, Texas. I like that. Austin, Texas, it was a fantastic show. It was so great to be back home. constitutional podcast episode 103 we are back from austin texas i like that austin texas it was a fantastic show it was so great to be back home a lot of y'all got surprised by our exclusive merch for the for the audio listeners you can't see but austin texas got exclusive merch if you're new here if you haven't already look below you see the subscribe button is it pressed you're wrong

if you look even more below then you see the comment section is fulfilled with your name guess what even more wrong go ahead and fill that out guys we have special special special news right we have the vlog on patreon we have another conspiracy coming up on patreon we have so much coming up on patreon and more exciting news the first twitch stream is going to be this wednesday round of applause for the first twitch stream you will see all your. You will get a lot of new information. You might get a sneak peek at the new merch. The new merch drop. Oh my God.

I cannot wait for y'all to see it. It's so, so fantastic. We will be back on the road in the summer. Those dates and tickets will be available soon. Just be sure to follow me on Instagram at PSHA. Follow Cam on Instagram at CamKennedy22. And follow the You Should Know Podcast at YouShouldKnowPod on Instagram. We love you so much.

Now on to the rest of the episode. The You Should Know Podcast. We got co-host Cam back in the studio. Oh, he's, oh, hey, go Cam one, go Cam one, go Cam one. Hey, hey, hey, Cam's feeling good after Austin, Texas. We got Cam. Round of applause for co-host Cam. It's time to play the game!

It's all about the cam. And how you play it. It's all about the cams and how he can take it. Why? I would love to have... We got co-hosts, Cam. Fix your stance now. Back in the studio.

Now. Fix it. Why have you been like that towards me? Been like what? Controlling and demanding. Because you keep flashing your genitalia in my general direction. Behind closed. Okay, okay, thank you.

Don't make a violation. You're like, what's up, Cam? I'm a wide guy. What does that even mean? I spread eagle. You don't like to spread eagle for comfort? Sorry, I got a lot of weight. You ever carry around 15 pounds on your pelvis?

We should start over, no? No. No. You deserve to reap what you've sowed, you sick creep. One of my favorite things. You remind me of Doodle Jump right there. You remember that game? Doodle Jump was good.

Do you remember the peak of, what was that game, Temple Run? Oh, my God. I was a Temple Run fanatic. I was so good at a Temple Run. I swear to God I would have been better than you. I was that game, Temple Run? Oh, my God. I was a Temple Run fanatic. I was so good at a Temple Run. I swear to God I would have been better than you. I was so good at Temple Run. You have crooked, gnarled fingers. I had very straight, very good dexterity.

Ooh, my name's Cam. I never put a day's work in my life. Went out in the field and hurt myself. You went out in the field? You broke your fingers by fouling on defense because you were a creep. You couldn't... So you said, how did I break my collarbone? How did I break my elbow? How did I

hyperextend my knee? How did I break my foot? How did that happen? Collarbone was birth. Oh. I broke my collarbone when I came out. So you were a weak ass baby. I was 10 pounds, 22 inches. You were a weak ass. Yeah, dude, that's scary.

Okay, for y'all to- All natural birth. Shout out to my mom. Facts. For y'all to understand, if you're a woman that has married or has a partner that is a large man and you expect to have children that are our size, just know you're going to have a mega birth. What are our kids going to look like? Okay, we're not going to have children that are our size, just know you're going to have a mega birth. What are our kids going to look like?

Okay, we're not going to have them. If we did have kids, let's describe that kid. I've thought about it. You know that AI generator app? Whenever you put the two pictures together? You showed me. And then you, yeah. Thank God it got me.

My features, huh? I think if we had a kid, right? Yeah. In some weird utopian world. Oh my God. I think if we had a kid right yeah in some weird utopian world oh my god i think it'd be a cool kid now the parenting is where we'd be so different i'd be like get in do your homework be good be good to society and you'd be like hey i don't get what's up man what do you do today dog you good yeah hey there's some beef here in the freezer so you gnaw it down but that'd be that'd be where it'd be different.

No. I'd go, what do you want for dinner? What do you want for dinner, bud? What are you thinking? You go, hey, I'm ordering a pizza again. The kid's like, Dad, that's six weeks in a row. I want something else, please, Papa. And you go, you don't get to beg in my house.

That'd be you. That'd be you as a kid. No, you'd be like, the most important thing is school and literature. You'd be like, we got to do math problems. We have to read Romeo and Juliet. Hey, I'm actually going to do that. No bullshit. Two things I've told Liv.

Whenever we have kids, certain times when I drive around, I'm going to play classical music. You said you're going to put headphones on her stomach and play classical music. You did say that. I never said that. Yes, you did. Yes, you did. Y'all are lying. You said that years ago, but you said it.

That's a bit much. I can't wait for your kids to resent you. To resent me? So they can run. They're like, I want to go to a weird... Whoa, be careful. A weird what? What'd you just say?

What were you trying to say? Yeah. No. I can't wait. You know what, Dad? Screw you. You're such a jackass. I'm going to go to a weird, smelly, hairy Uncle Ben's house.

Your kids are going to love the house. Oh, my God. At that point in your life, you were going to be in a much larger house. Yeah. Naked, wearing a robe. Yeah. With gnarled feet out at all times. Yeah.

I hope you have a pet at least by then. I'm going to have 17 German Shepherds named Titus. All of them Titus. Titus!'m gonna have 17 german shepherds named titus all of them titus titus 17 german shepherds you you do realize that would never work with you why you cannot raise a dog by yourself why i'm a good dog dad i'm i'm a good dog you'd wake up thursday and you'd be like oh i've got a lot on these... Oh, I haven't fed Titus since Sunday. And your dog, you go, where is he? He's like literally balled up in a corner.

He's like... He's gasping for air. No, one thing about me, I'm a good delegator. I'll hire somebody to feed the dog. And that's not a real... That is lame. That is not... You're going to hire someone to feed your baby?

So what's the difference between that and a nanny? Gotcha, you stupid... to hire someone to feed your baby? So what's the difference between that and a nanny? Gotcha, you stupid. Gotcha. Gotcha. No. What's the difference? What's the difference? What's the difference?

What's the difference? Nanny is for when you're not there and you're not capable to do it yourself. Says who? Is this a nanny handbook? That's what nannies are for. No, you can't have a live-in nanny. Live-in nanny? You know what the parents do when they're live-in nannies?

Yeah. They're working constantly. Who says I'm not working constantly? Do I work constantly? Yes'm not working do i work constantly yes or no do i work you work constantly to where you can't i don't work constantly to where you can't i can barely feed myself to where you can't you you eat every day do yeah you eat every single day at least twice some days every single day at least twice you couldn't feed your dog you would hire i could i could so so is it even fair to say that'd be your pet? Yes.

I bought that motherfucker. You bought him. That's mine. He belongs to me. Exactly. But is there a deep love? Is there a deep connection? Yes.

If someone else is feeding the dog, taking the dog out, playing with the dog. Yes. I love that dog. I love him to death. That's why I'm getting a professional. That costs $13,000 a month to feed and water my dog. Sorry that you're Mr. St. Laurent. You're Mr. St. Laurent?

That's exactly what your mind's at. You're not ready for Titus. You're ready for Birkin. Okay, you're just mad that your kid's going to want to spend more time with me than you. You're mad because, yes, he's like, I can't wait to drive him off with you. He'll have fun. My dad's been playing Beethoven and 2K all week. I haven't even talked to him, and he snaps so much.

I snap? It's like, I thought you were talking about Snapchat. You're like, my dad just wakes up and just... I'm sorry. And then your son's going to be like, Uncle P, can you teach me what a CPM is? And I'll be like, yeah. Yeah, he goes, Uncle P, where's Georgia? And you go, hell if I know.

Yeah, is that going to help your life? Is that going to make you a buck? Nope, don't need to know it. What if they need to work in Georgia? You never know. You can choose the life you live. You can. So don't.

So you'd openly choose to have a live-in nanny for a pet? That's what you want to choose? If I can afford it, yes. That's definitely what I'm asking. It's not if you can afford it. You'll be able to afford it. Okay, then yes. I can afford it.

But I'm saying you'd rather choose that than to grind and cede the parenthood for the dog yourself. I'm parenting the dog. I'm teaching it to love me. Lay with me. It sleeps with me. It sounds like you're teaching it to love the nanny. No, the nanny's just feeding it and providing for it.

You know who dogs love most? What? Providers. Who's going to give me food? I don't have a thumb. Okay, question. How many times does Liv walk the dog, your dog? Never.

Does Ruby love Liv? She loves Liv, yeah. Okay. Liv feeds Ruby. Liv has walked her before. Liv's been countless. Okay, I will feed the dog sometimes. I will walk the dog sometimes.

You literally, okay, initially you said, I'm going to pay someone to do it. Yeah, for a majority of it, for a majority of it, yes. So imagine if you were like this, right? And you go, hey, what's up, Titus? And then that's it. But then Titus gets fed from, let's call her Julie. I'll be like, Julie, feed Titus. And I'll be like, Titus, go get food from Julie. Titus gets his food from Julie. What's wrong with that? Titus gets fed from, let's call her Julie. I'd be like, Julie, feed Titus. I'd be like, Titus, go get food from Julie.

Titus gets his food from Julie. What's wrong with that? Titus gets his belly rub from Julie. Titus walks from Julie and plays with Julie. That's the thing with you. Do you think he's going to love you or Julie more? That's the thing with you. You love to judge people.

No, okay. You are a judger of people. If they don't live the life you live, you're like, look down on them. No, I'm saying, okay, same example. Does Ruby love me or Liv more? I don't know. I'm not in your house. I don't know.

I don't know what y'all's conversations are with Ruby. If you had to guess, does she love me or Liv more? I would say me. Out of both of y'all, she loves me more. She loves Uncle P. And have I fed her once? Uncle P is her favorite person. Never.

You literally give her treats every time. Okay, I'll give Titus attention. There you go. Point blank, okay i gotta say something you're itching your ass i have a question dude i've been smelling good i've been smelling good recently i have this new deodorant and when i go like this normally it's a it's like it's like somebody put like two week old chipotle in a microwave for two minutes too Too long. And that's what I smell when I'm driving. I've been using this new deodorant. And it smells good. Deodorant.

It smells good. I smell like soap all the time. Even if I don't bathe. I can just put deodorant on. What is it? I can't say. They're not paying. What's your scent?

Soap. It's a soap scent. It's a soap scent. And that's what I have to say. Is it soap? I don't know, but it smells like soap. I don't... You're pissing me off! He's don't... You're pissing me off!

It's already through! You're pissing me off! What I gotta say is, you've been smelling worse than me recently. Yeah, right. Kim, you... This is what... When you smell bad, you smell bad. I do.

You smell worse than I could ever imagine me smelling. Now you... That is a bold face. You smell like a dog park outside in the summer with wet grass and Molded pennies how often I'm not saying often. I'm just saying when you smell bad you smell horrible. I smell horrible Yes, I can it's like I can smell your DNA whenever You can smell my genetic makeup. Dude, like you reek. No, when I stink, it's a stench. It's like something's rotting inside of you.

But would you rather smell... Why were you... What? What happened? You followed my finger. Yeah, because it was so red. I said, but you... You were playing with a magic trick.

Would you rather smell like me? Awful. Dead garbage, right? Awful. Yeah, like a raccoon's home. Twice a month? Yeah. Or smell like you.

Five out of ten. Six out of ten stench. Eighteen times. But I think this has just become a joke in the podcast. I don't smell bad that often. No, you really don't. Thank you. There was a point in life where I did.

I was about to say, rewind a year or two, it was funky. It was bad, bro. It was like, do you know deodorant? Are you going through this natural life path? If you are, I'm not one to judge. If you see this, just know I mean it in the most loving way. I can feel a lot better now. It's like I can feel my puberty.

But I think you used to rely on cologne no i think now i rely on cologne i couldn't afford cologne back then you always had cologne no i didn't i never had cologne i would have sample bottles there we go never mind i would that was my go-to i would go to the mall and get sample bottles but cologne all cologne is is it's an enhancer you're huh your scent shouldn't be your cologne it enhances you your actual living scent was rubbish like it was bad like you you as a human being didn't smell good cologne is not to mask that cologne is i've bathed deodorant so i have body wash yeah deodorant possibly you just chewed the mic possibly lotion cologne is an enhancement yeah it cannot be your your idea i'm not going

your tub stinks my tub stinks when is the last time you've bathed in my tub for you to say that you've literally haven't no you've showered once in our new place and it was the guest one it wasn't mine your porcelain is stained by your smell no okay i'm not i'm not talking about your home shower i'm not talking about that i'm talking about like when we're on the road right we're on tour and if i ever shower after you i can tell cam cam just got done in here because i shit you thank you pierce i shit then i shower that is a respectful move because y'all got the big y'all y'all always get the big rooms in the where we stay correct sometimes i want to use the big room i'm like let me like in austin you got the big room nice shower there's also three other

people bathing in there how do you know it's me three other people bathing in there you live ashland and you's me? Three other people bathing in there? You, Liv, Ashlyn, and you bathed. There's four people total that bathed in there. Me and three other. Three plus one is four. I did it once. Okay. Ashlyn did it once. But I'm saying, yeah.

I'm just saying, whenever I follow you, stop trying to defend yourself. Okay. You stink like ass. I shit and then shower. Dude, but it's like weird. There's corn nuggets in my poop and then I bathe. Why are you so gross poop again poop talk almost the day we go without poop talk i'm giving everybody here two grand

literally it's never it's never gonna happen it's never gonna um no but like whenever you get out of the shower and i follow you up it is just like you would have been great in like war and like ancient times like your musk would have gained you power like you would have been like i rule the earth sniff you know what i mean i could use it i could make i could make enemies out of my stench yeah okay it's not that's a bit that's that's a stretch no i'm telling you you're you make portions stink i poop and it's not the poop bro it's not a poop smell it's like how the hell does my body stink after I bathe? It's like layers of your skin come off and like melts into the porcelain and then now

it's eroding and now the funk is coming up. You smell like lava. Pierce, with a gun to your head, if you had to lick my armpit or his armpit, who would you lick? You have to lick an armpit. Mine or his? No, your pits are worse than mine. Whose pit?

Stinch, everything you know. My ass stinks. Everything you know included. Whose armpit? That's stupid. No, but I have found out that, like, do you ever do something intentionally gross, or not intentionally gross? Do you ever do something intentionally or not intentionally gross do you

ever find out you're unintentionally gross oh yeah yeah it happens to me quite often right and i figured it out like i know like some things i do are just gross but i do them right and i i'm aware what i'm doing is gross i agree i've unintentionally done something gross for the past six years of my life and i haven't taken these earrings out that are in my skull for six years not once only time they came out was when your dog bit them out you haven't taken these earrings out that are in my skull for six years not once the only time they came out was when your dog bit them out you haven't took those out in six singular times not once i forget that they're there never once have i taken them out shower with them on get into okay hot tubs with them on we want to talk about stenches right if you removed that gold hoop you will literally kill a village

i'm starting to get keloids no you don't yeah i got a keloid right here you have a keloid yeah show me your ear look can you see it or maybe it's this ear i don't know but but this is when i found out i was gross because i this is what reminded me that i had these earrings on for six years so i woke up the other night and i was laying on my side and my earlobe was swollen. Like it hurt. And I was like, what the f***? And then I look at my pillow, right? And I have white pillowcases.

And there was green and red on the pillow. Oh! And then I squeezed my earlobe like this and it said... And I like my ears getting licked too. So this is not advantageous for anybody. Did you just... Did you just admit that you had literal gunk? Yeah, like a goo ear syndrome.

Oh my god. I had to ice my ear. I never took the earrings out, but I iced them. You still didn't take it out? I haven't yet. Your ear literally secreted like disease. and you left it in there but whenever we go to la i'm gonna get new earrings i'm just gonna get big studs to cover up the keloids that actually just started sweating a lot green and red pus no i'm not gonna lie live's mom kissed my keloid and i never said

anything about it because your mom always gives me kisses on the cheek when i hug her but i was like what was she what she was like oh baby and there's like a green like oh i would have shot one of you one of you would have had to leave no and i felt terrible about it but i never brought it up i started going well now you know, Lolly. She's like, she said rust? Are you pitying me? That straw made of copper? No. That is, that's worse, I think, than anything I've ever done.

Six years? Yeah. But you're weird. You take off everything when you sleep. I take off everything. Yeah. That was a good week by me. That was a good week by me.

Okay, I have a, okay, this has nothing to do with six years ago more like 12 old nostalgia thing yeah my brain works in mysterious ways oh shit do you remember okay walk with me let's let's teleport my legs are sore to a taco bell 2009 okay 2009 taco bell prime time right that's when they still do like the 70s look in there the 70s look you're walking in right do you remember when they still did the 70s look in there. 70s look, you're walking in, right? Do you remember that tower game? With the penny? With the coin? Yeah. You could win free shit?

Hell yeah, I remember that. It was fantastic. At one point in time, I'd say for a five-month stretch, that was my identity. Yeah. I went to school bragging about it. I literally said, if you give me a nickel, I can give you cinnamon twists.

I never lost at that. I had it down to a T. Bro, that reminds me. I gave a thousand pennies to leukemia. You can't laugh at that. You can't laugh at that. I did. It was called pennies for patients.

I'm not laughing at the cause. You just said you gave money to a disease. You didn't say the corporation. Oh, yeah, that's wrong. You said I gave a thousand pennies to leukemia you didn't there's a corporation that's like oh yeah i gave six cans of food to but lupus like there's a company i i remember when i donated yeah i donated 10 grand to cancer you it's or did What is the company? Was it an angel fund? Was it a...

What is it? You said I gave money to leukemia. Penis for Patients is what it's called. Here we go. It was in Ms. Winkler's class. I am so tired of it. We need to have Ms. Winkler on this damn podcast. I miss her.

That reminds me, though. One day they had a math-a-lon at my school. You went to a private school they had a mathalon competition in my school and you were excluded from your fourth period class only one period right what grade was this this was about i was just about to say i think sixth okay sixth or seventh one of the first where you have multiple classes and i was like all right i'm gonna do my hardest and we get just being a loser yeah just loser shit like I'm so I'm like oh I'm gonna kill everyone else cuz there's

competition but then when I got there I found out every math question you answered rice ten grains of rice was My poor feeble mind didn't understand what 10 grains. It's like this. So 10 grains per question, right? Tell me why I was in that bitch thinking I was feeding millions. I was sitting there. I answered hundreds of questions. And at the end, it gave me my total.

And I'd be lying if I said I remember exactly. But it was something in the thousands. Like just regular. It was like I did, I don't know two thousand three thousand grains you got one bowl and i was like hell i was like i'm am i philanthropist i was like i'm doing great i'm doing god's work and then i went home and i googled i said google images i went three thousand grains of rice it wasn't it was like half a bowl of rice. And I was like, God.

I said, that's such a scam. I was like, I just fed one lady. Like, that was it. Barely. She's still not even full. She had a serving. She had one serving. That reminds me of box tops. Yes or no, was I a box top geek?

I was a box top geek. Yeah, you were my, you, you give all those vibes. I was a young philanthropist. Yeah. I was, I was good good i was so good with like giving with all the other shit like in school something about box tops my mom hated she did not mess with box tops she because you'd have to cut them off the cinnamon toast crunch stop cutting my box i intend oh i yeah i intentionally purchased items when I went to the grocery store with my mom that had box hops.

She's like, this is your favorite. I said, this one can give back, though. I was a little philanthropist. But then, again, I came to realize every box hop was like 10 cents. I'm like, did I just donate like a hot, like, that's one meal. That's funny. It's better than nothing. The You Should Know Podcast.

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I'm not going to lie. You know I spent a lot of money or I used to spend a lot of money on takeout and I always felt gross afterwards. Factor Meals is cheaper and is better for you. I stand by Factor to my dying day. Head to factormeals.com slash YSK50 and use code YSK50 to get 50% off. That's code YSK50 at factormeals.com slash YSK50 to get 50% off. Now on to the rest of the episode. Let's talk about our Austin trip. They're old Podcast. Let's talk about our Austin trip.

They're old days. Let's talk about our Austin trip. We went back home to the 512 for the sold out Austin show. Thank you to everybody that came to the Austin show. It was fantastic. We have a big surprise for everybody at the end of the summer. Let's not even talk about the show. The show is great.

We love you. We'll talk about it more on Patreon. The recap's on Patreon. Let's talk about just Austin, Texas. All right? I love it. I love Austin. I grew up there? I love it. I love Austin. I grew up there.

I love it. It's so different from whenever I grew up there. I want you to get into that. How it's different? The difference. I'm going to say 10 seconds first. I absolutely love Austin. It's very fun.

It's like the whole, I said community, like it's 20 people. There's millions of people, right? But the whole vibe of the city is like, be active. Get outside. Take your shirt off. Get some, that sounds crazy. No, there's a lot of naked people. A lot of naked people.

Not like naked being weird, but just absorbing sun. Everyone has a dog. It's just very wholesome. It makes you feel good when you're there. But you kept telling us, God, this is so different. I've lived in Austin since 1999. Explain it. To 2017.

So I was in Austin before the big austin boom yeah so austin used to be like this community like it was just like it was weird it was everybody was from austin right there was these food spots that were bad that were gross like not gross they tasted fantastic but bad for you yeah then everybody from la in cal moved to Austin and now Austin is just LA literally nobody in Austin is from Austin anymore so they changed everything

and all the food you can get hemp grass here you can get vegan tacos vegan waffle I'm like and then everybody

like where's the grease it's like everybody's just like it's a bunch of everybody got armpit hair and dreadlocks now no matter your nationality. No matter.

So many leg tattoos. Oh, the leg tattoos were abundant. I'm like, it's just different. It's just different. It really is. It's just. So do you like the difference or do you not? It's good to visit.

I will never live there again. I will never live there because it just makes me kind of sad. It just makes me sad. It's like this isn't my home. It's not. It's not. But one of the things in Austin is the the big thing is um ladybird lake yeah um right right there by zilker or barton springs whatever uh there's this big river right and a lot

of people go kayaking on this right i don't even know it's a river lake i don't know bodies of water and for cam's bachelor party we went kayaking and i i can't swim i'm scared of water a lot of dead bodies are found in that water. I don't like it. But I love Cam, and I was like, is your bachelor party? We'll go kayaking. Yes. So Cam, when we came back to Austin for this show, he goes, let's go kayaking. No.

But you've already done it once. No. I will drown. I don't like it. You are wearing a life jacket. I don't trust life jackets. I feel like that's a good first step, but then you will still have to know how to keep going. You don't do anything.

If you fall over, your water, you're like, and then you're just like this. And you just float. No, I'm top heavy. I feel like I'll roll over. I feel like my head will... If I stay still, I'm top heavy. I'll just roll. What the hell my head will... Still, I'm top heavy.

I'll just roll. What the hell did you... Top heavy? I'm top heavy. This upper half, I'll just go... You know what I mean? You don't... It's not a ball.

You're not cylindrical. You can't... You're literally just bobbing. You're like this. Top heavy. I'm top heavy. I'll roll like a ball. You're not top, middle, or bottom heavy.

I'm middle heavy. I got a lot of weight distribution down there. My lower back is in shambles good morning to you how are we doing feed your kids you don't you don't roll you don't even move but i don't understand two seconds underwater and then the life jacket does exactly what he needs to do i weigh 200 i wear i weigh 210 pounds exactly right this same life jacket was given to a six-year-old exactly that same life jacket that's saving a six-year-old. Exactly. That same life jacket that's saving a six-year-old is going to save big man, top-heavy, big guy over here?

Science. Science-backed. You. Float. You sit there and wait to be rescued. Can you not be a damsel in distress? No, bro. If water gets above the neck, I'm panicking.

I'm losing my mind. That's the beautiful part. If you fell off your kayak, of course you're going to go underwater. Yeah. Of course you might make eye contact with a corpse. But after that two seconds, right? You go. I love when you make that noise.

It's like a... It's like a... It's like a rebirth. And you're sitting there and you're just... So you're saying I have to do nothing with my legs? Absolutely nothing. You're lying. You could literally be like this under the water. And that life jacket is going to keep...

I don't believe that. F*** you. You don't have to believe it it's there's nothing to believe bro the science of shit doesn't make sense like doorbells where the what where the hell is the noise from the doorbell coming from in my house how am i in my bathroom when i hear the doorbell that is a fantastic question how so so so you're saying you i was door dashing the other day I was in You were not door dashing No I ordered a door dash

I ordered a door dash He thought I was out here delivering people's food Your shit would be gone before he got to the door The worst ever But I don't understand doorbells You know what I mean So the doorbell they just put that John on there right there on the door I put it on there yes I did It? So the doorbell, they just put that John on there.

Right there on the door. Right? I put it on there. Yes, I did. It was a ring doorbell. I have a ring doorbell. That's a ring. I'm going to hit you in public.

That is a doorbell. It has a button and it goes. Okay. So I just put that on there. Screwed it into the wall. Boom. What was that doorbell? That's a sad ass doorbell.

First off, that is a great value doorbell my name's cam i'm rich as can be i have a ring as well jack exactly how the hell does it work so listen my house is three stories not even trying to be like it's a it's a big house right i got it on a discount it's my friend's parents house they let me use it not true at all that's none of that's none of that is true i have a semi-large house yes you do it's nice so i was upstairs on the top floor okay in my bathroom which is pushed back it is the back top of the house closed door and all i had the i had the wind to go in to suck up the poop you have the wind going explain that because it sucks up the poop smell right and i'm listening to music on my i home

right i'm listening to music i'm shitting my brains out the wind's going i'm at the top floor back of my house right the door dasher from three stories down rings the doorbell i can hear that it's where the fuck is that noise coming i don't have speakers in my house. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. Oh my God, I have speakers in my house? How else do you think you can hear it? That's my question. How else do you think you can hear it?

Make it make sense. Hey, you've been in my house. Yeah. Where's the speaker? You can't see it. I'm not saying it's a ghost. There's spy speakers. I have spy speakers in my house.

I have spy speakers. I'm saying you in my house. I have spy speakers. I'm saying you haven't looked for it. It is definitely there. Where? How? They're typically up. If you go to like normal houses, like kind of older houses. I have a normal house.

You see that thing right there. They can't see it, but do you see it? Yes. It'll look something like that. Sometimes they're just boxes. It'll be a whole box up at the top. I swear to God. I'll give you $10,000 if you find a speaker in my house.

Kevin, that's not true. That's not true. There's no speakers in the house. So how are you hearing it? That if you find a speaker in my house. That's not true. There's no speakers in the house. So how are you hearing it? That's my question, but you're lying. There's no speakers in my house. Kim, I've been to every square inch of my house. I bought the house. Adorba.

You built it? I bought it. I thought you said you built it. I was about to spank you. Say it. Say you built it. Kim, there's no speakers in my house it's

it's that's a thermostat Pierce yes it's like a little box in older houses so where's the speaker in my bathroom I haven't been in your bathroom for one time there's nothing in there in that bathroom it's a 2x4

I'm telling you if you are hearing it clear as day in there how though I physically's a two by four i'm telling you if you are hearing it clear as day in there how okay how though i physically bought that that that ring doorbell i put it on the on the wall right by my door i had freedom of choice where i put that thing freedom of choice anywhere on that door i could have put it screwed it in screwed it in connected to the app how the hell did it connect to the speakers i don't think you didn't buy that ring doorbell that was already there that was already there was it not i bought a new one i didn't trust that one because the landlord had that one they had the password so i don't like that that's a fair point but a ring if the ring's going all the way through your house then it's obviously it's hardwired in there somehow

like that spot that you connected it to. A regular doorbell. I have freedom of choice. Is this a magic trick? Is it David Blaine? Did David Blaine build this house? Do you have a Chris Haysel doorbell? Yeah, what the hell? Mind freak?

What is going on? I don't understand doorbells. Okay, let's break it down. That shit nauseates me. Let's break it down. You're taking a shit. Ding dong. You're like. You just get freaked out.

I'm literally like this. Okay, so hear me out so loud let's start from step one regular doorbells yes okay they are wired to that spot that's why they're in the same spot regular okay that wiring goes through the foundation it's a long wire it's wires can be long who put that wire there the people that built the house then why can't you buy doorbells at home depot because you can put different fixtures on it the wire is still the wire that's how a door but matter of fact to to we're gonna reverse psychology this you explain to me without saying i don't know try to make it make sense how are you hearing a bell

from outside if there's not speakers god yeah he's just going dong every time you get a visit no that's the crazy part anywhere in my house i can hear it loud as can be so so there's not speakers. God, yeah. He's just going, every time you get a visitor. No, that's the crazy part. Anywhere in my house, I can hear it loud as can be. So logically, what does that mean? There's not a goddamn speaker on my staircase, Cameron. It's not on your staircase. It's in the house.

It's hidden. Where, Cam? We'd have to go excavate the bitch and take some pictures and find it. So a house built in 1980. Yes. An old ass house, right? Has a doorbell.

Yes. Where are the speakers at in there? My grandma has a doorbell. Ain't no goddamn built in 1980. Yes. An old-ass house, right? Has a doorbell. Yes. Where are the speakers at in there? My grandma has a doorbell. Ain't no goddamn speakers in there. Yes, there is. Okay, that's your thing. You're probably thinking there's a subwoofer on the ceiling with a DJ palette. There's a little fly family throwing raves at night.

No, it's very discreet for a reason. Who wants a big-ass 12-inch speaker? But how can I hear it everywhere is the question you have different floors each floor has speakers each floor has each room has one too the floor then how can i hear it so clearly when i close my door to my laundromat so are you in the simulation are you in are you a robot no are you different from us no then so there's a mixer there's a mixer no i can turn down the levels not a soundboard there's not a soundboard but i'm saying what if i'm mentally impaired not mentally uh audibly

impaired i can i turn it up people have flashes those. There's flashing doorbells for audio. Yeah. Okay. Cool. It's green today. No. It's Wednesday. No.

You have to install that. A typical doorbell. There is a thing. Install that. Huh? Exactly. You have to install the speaker. You have to install the light.

The light. Somebody has to install the speaker. I never installed a speaker. There's no speakers. The person who built it did. There's no speakers in my house. I looked around. So how can you hear everything? Cam, Cam, Cam. On Patreon, we're going to vlog this. there's no speakers in my house i looked around so how can you hear everything okay cam cam cam on patreon we're gonna vlog this we're gonna vlog my house where i'm gonna give you my address to my house everybody come kill me we're gonna get

the address to my house we're gonna go meet and greet my house everybody come to my house first person to find my speaker gets ten thousand dollars i will be the first Oh my god. Oh my god. Bro, you just went batshit crazy. I know. Because I don't like that. I don't like that. I don't like that. It's a speaker, papa.

Why didn't for your bachelor party you let me give you a lap dance? What? Because Liv said no strippers and I could have been one. I could have given you a little dance. I could have been a fireman, an EMT. An EMT. Police. You were going to be a cop.

I thought you were. You were going to be a cop and tie me up and strip on me. Do you hear yourself? Do you hear yourself? You wouldn't like that? No. No. God, no.

I'm just, well, for my bachelor party, if I ever have one. I'm not doing it. That's so selfish of you. I got into the water for you. That was life-dangering for me. Me strapping up as a skimpy nurse and giving you a lap dance is not life-dangering. Exactly. That is pure pleasure.

Exactly. You creep. I gave you pleasure on your bachelor party for getting in the water. Watch it. You better finish that sentence quicker. By getting in the water, did I pleasure you? Yes. So pleasure me. Dress up as a sexy nurse. No. As a joker nurse. You can put face paint on, so I don't know what to count on.

The way you hold me, me hold me hold me hold me hold me come when hold me now no you you need help oh i've said this for over a year and a half now i know i'm gonna start looking at the inside of my body it's just i have. So we got in a big fight in Austin over breakfast. We had a big fight. So in Austin, we rented an Airbnb. We had to cook breakfast in the kitchen. Now, we had bacon for breakfast at our Airbnb. Oh, my God. We had nine people in the house.

Everybody was different on how they wanted their bacon. Cam, the way you like your bacon makes me want to punch you in the throat. I guarantee more people like bacon like me than they like you. How do you like bacon? Guarantee. I like my shit crisp. Yeah, you like charcoal and rocks. I'm not saying dirt to where you can go.

Cam, you said you literally talked to the person who's cooking the bacon. You said it's not black enough. That was a word that came out of your mouth. That is. I want it charred. I'm talking about charred, Cam. Let's explain to bacon, you said it's not black enough. That was a word that came out of your mouth. That is. I want it charred. Talking about charred, Kim. Let's explain to them how you like it. Damn near raw. I want that bitch oinking at me almost.

Exactly. You like your meat translucent. You want to be able to hold it and still see me on the other side. Hey, nasty boy, I like a little flavor and juice in my bacon. Sorry. Hey, caveman,

we figured out how to cook things. Let it cook a little bit. Hey, I forgot you work on a coal mine and you want to eat char. There's no... It's not char. It is bacon. You might as well jump on a locomotive going down the street and like, I'll eat your fuel. Don't worry about that, you nasty bitch. Sorry. You might as well kill the pig right then and there.

He's literally screaming. you grab his cute little side go after it you you oh my god you're oh you're you're tribal what's the point of of the bacon without the flavor is the flavor gone when i cook it longer yes that's exactly what happens actually no the fat leaves that's. I don't like the fat. I don't like the gristle part. What? I don't like going... That's the best part.

One of the best parts. On bacon. When it curls a little bit and you put your tongue in there. But yours barely curls. Yours looks like you took a literal raw piece of bacon, threw it on, looked at it for 10 seconds, picked it up, flipped it, same thing, took it off. I want my shit like wet tissue paper almost oh my god no there's that is inexcusable i'm not taking the l on this and who they side with more in austin just our i don't give a shit what these losers said

bacon is not raw bacon is is literally what you feed like animals they want to eat the tires off the polar express i don't give a shit i like my shit with a little juice and flavor i want my Bacon is literally what you feed animals. They want to eat the tires off the Polar Express. I don't give a shit. I like my shit with a little juice and flavor. I want my shit. This is what you do. You put that bitch on there. Sizzles for about 10 seconds.

10 seconds, you flip it. 10 seconds, you're done. I'm surprised you haven't had a disease yet. I probably have a couple. You probably do. I'm surprised your stomach is not rotten. Bro, a bacon a little raw, not a little raw, but barely cooked, that shit is like a warm towel that you get out of the dryer oh my god i almost bought you one of those a warm to a dryer a towel warmer believe what is a towel warmer you plug it into

an outlet that's too much work i would have never used it i would have never used it what the fuck i'm glad you didn't do that waste the money for I got to plug some shit in the wall to use a towel? All you do is plug it in, and then your towel. It's gas. It's money. It's sex. Wait, you plug the towel into the wall? Shut up!

You plug... It's a little... It's like a little... Imagine like a small looking hamper, okay? It just sits in the corner of your bathroom. Oh, so it's like a... Oh, I thought you were thinking... I was thinking of like...

Like an air mattress when it was deflated, and you just put the towel in there and you fold it over i don't know why my mind went so descriptive but that's what i thought of you wear my hat i'm not kidding it smells so much like you like a sweaty runny payton wear my hat please i might have to adjust it in the back. No, just do it like how it is this year. That looks good, bro. I remember you used to wear hats all the time. I miss it.

It's like Seminole camp. You look good, bro. Thank you. You look like you can spend a mean 16 about how much Detroit means to you. Off of him and me, him and me. Rocks him and me, him and me. No, but. That's an awfully high coffee platter.

I dump it on Donald Trump. Probably not. Mic drop. Give me the hat back. Yeah, no, you need it and I don't. Can we switch clothes? No. You've been wearing this shirt for two days.

Three days now. No, I'm not switching clothes. Oh, my God. What's up? Why are you itching yourself? One, but I'd be willing to bet there's a stain on the shirt. Somewhere. Not sweat. Sweat's obvious. it's hot as shit oh yeah right here

i just a new shirt too it was part of the leftovers we had i just got it today i stained it in the oh my god oh my god i'm so sorry hello good morning to you how's your mom we're talking about the merch, the Austin merch. Do you remember? Do you remember at the t-shirt store? Holy shit. Oh my God. Y'all. Okay. You want to tell it?

You chime in. I'll set the scene. Okay, set the scene. So Peyton said, we had our Austin show. It's his homecoming, his hometown. He's the hometown kid himself. So we did an exclusive merch. By the way, if you don't know what that is, that is a very, very famous wall in Austin

that people travel to literally to take pictures. It's called the love you so much wall and we disgraced it's this cross that shit out it's this big like what would you call it turquoise greenish wall greenish wall it's like a greenish wall that has that in that same font right there it says i love you so much couples take pictures by all that right cross it out put ysk that's the awesome part anyway we were going to get these shirts made and when i you, you have to describe it, bro. You have to describe it. So we go into this t-shirt store about 40 minutes out from where we live, right? We're on the phone with them before.

We're like, we're telling them exactly what we want. We got pricing. We got sizes. We got everything. We go in there. We're like, hey, in there they had a whole bunch of t-shirts that they already made. And all of them were different textures, different blanks, all this stuff. So the guy goes, hey, I know you said you want this kind of shirt, but go ahead and feel around on our wall of displays and see what shirt actually tickles you, which one you actually want to sell.

So me and – I don't know if I'm going to tickle you. That's so dark. I'm sorry. So we go – we're feeling on these shirts that are hung up, right? We're feeling them. Oh, we like this one. We like this one.

We get to this one shirt at the end, right? These are all shirts that they've made for people. We get to this one shirt. We're all up inside the shirt, feeling it like this. We're rubbing it, grabbing the collar. We pull it out. We look at it. It was like an obituary picture of somebody.

It was an RIP shirt. Doves and all name her face someone's aunt was just right there on the shirt and my ass was tickling her nose i'm like grabbing her shit i'm like oh no okay but to make it even worse you know how he said we're feeling the first the first couple's like a football team yeah like a damn a random ass like a family reunion right and then we get to that one we're feeling it and we lit first off oh my god if y'all could have seen it it was one of those it was one of those moments it was like if it felt like if we laughed we were gonna die right then and there

we were literally like because it shocked and scared the hell out of us tell me why we go after the first shirt there was like 10 of them it was like a it was a graveyard it was unbelievable i was like you couldn't pick any other shirt any other design to have is this because all they're doing is showing the like each shirt was different showing the material different weight different brand that's all it is yeah there was like nine obituary shirts back to back in a row with think about how creepy that is with real human beings that are dead

that died that they can't felt on and we were like where are we right now dude that shit it was so funny but so sad

and so scary we felt like we had bad omens following us for a week it was holy hell that was bad oh my god I forgot all about that

dude that shit was bad if okay I don, I forgot all about that. Dude. That shit was bad. Okay, I don't know why this thought just hit my mind. Okay, that's very scary. Speaking of dead people. Okay. How do you want to be buried when you die? Do you want to be buried?

I want to be taxidermied. I already said that. Have you ever said? I definitely don't want to be taxidermied. I still don't think you can comprehend how scary that'd be. For y'all. If you were taxed, and you said you want to be texted. I still don't think you can comprehend how scary that'd be. For y'all. If you were texted and you said you want to add wheels to you. You want to put you on a base?

Take me to events. Like a band instrument and just wheel it around. Yeah, take me on events. But what would you want? A casket? Just put me normal. Yeah. A nice little tombstone.

I feel like they do something wicked with those caskets. I feel like, because there's so many. Think of how much. How many people die? A lot. Every day. People are dying. Millions.

Every day, people are buried in the ground. How much ground do we have? You don't think they've ever just taken some people out? You died in 1940. We're going to take you out. We're going to put somebody out. Bro, think about that, honestly. That's sad, but think about it.

They probably do. Like in Austin. Austin is filled, but think about it. They probably do. Like in Austin. Austin is filled, right? There's no room for anything. And they still have these cemeteries just randomly placed, right? That are full. I know Austin. I live there.

I know people that died in Austin. Yeah. But also, to your point, not everyone is in a casket. I would say majority are. I'd say it's 70%. That's a lot of people. That is. That's a ton of people. That's not even what I was asking's 70%. That's a lot of people. That is. That's a ton of people.

That's not even what I was asking. You think that's a total of five? I think, yeah. I'm not even... That was just a side point. I was asking if I killed somebody, right? So why were we even talking about that? Hold on.

It just kind of came. Your whole mind is on death right now. If I killed somebody, right? And you knew I did it. I told you about it. I called you right after. I was like, Cam, I got him good he's gone he's not coming back I do whatever I'd help it'd be okay and then I have a court date I have a court date right okay I'll go to court call camera into the stand they go cam

there's a call right after I really hope this never happens because they're gonna use this as evidence there's a call right after. I really hope this never happens because they're going to use this as evidence. There's a call right after this killing took place. Right after this crime took place. Peyton called you. We think Peyton did it. Why'd he call you? What'd he say? He was on his way home from Chipotle and we were talking about topics for the next week's thing.

He just saw something crazy that happened in the restaurant. He simply called me. I put it down in my notes and I actually have it. You can check the timestamp on my notes oh so you would go back but what if there's no time what if you were so distraught by me telling you this information you wouldn't think to put time stamps in your i'm prepared for anything i'm prepared for the moment okay okay i'm not gonna lie i think you would absolutely defile me if this if roles were reversed you'd probably be like he did did it. I'm not. That is

a him thing, a solo man job. Have you seen my butt? What? I'm not going to jail for you. Oh, you have a nice ass? Bro, high and tight. That's fake as hell. I just, do you see how quick I just did that? That's your fault. I didn't ask you to do that. Okay, Mr. Harden, we actually have a phone call

coming from Mr. Kennedy's phone directly after we think he committed this crime to your phone. Do you mind sharing your insight on that phone call? Yeah, but he called me. He said, I did that shit. I tried to tell him not to. You can't. Okay, try to think of a real one.

Try to cover me. Okay. Mr. Harden, there was a phone call at 8.12 p.m. last Tuesday evening immediately after we think Mr. Kennedy committed this crime. Do you want to share some insight on that phone call? What was said? Mr. Harden, is there something funny right now order in my court why are you laughing if you yell you took an oath to god in this nation um what was the question one more time if he killed somebody there was a

did he kill somebody there was a phone that's what we're trying to figure out mr harden and we think you know about it which is also a serious offense there was a phone. That's what we're trying to figure out, Mr. Harden. And we think you know about it, which is also a serious offense. There was a phone call at 8-12 Tuesday evening, right after we thought he committed this crime. To your phone, you answered it. Y'all shared the phone call for 13 minutes. Would you like to share some insight on what was happening during that phone call? Most of our phone calls, I just make them real comfortable and show them my butt.

I showed them my butt mr harden are you are you on the record saying you showed him your butt i show my butt a lot on an audio phone call because this wasn't a facetime oh shit this oh you're seeming to sweat are you lying on the stand i'm just scared scared of what the prison the imprisonment which you might deal with have you seen my butt this is a minimum of 10 years we're talking of you in the cell. Have you seen my butt? Mr. Harden, are you asking me nudity questions on this stand? I can't go to jail.

Order in the court. If you can't go to jail, tell us he didn't. Tell us you know. He didn't. I know. God damn it. That was two minutes of work and you crumbled. Why would they ask me though? Why would you let them ask me? Because I called you. Why'd you call me? Because you're my best friend. I just offed somebody.

I got to let it out. I'm trying to get your help. We have some resources. Maybe we can get something popping. I feel like there's somebody better you could have called. Honestly, I would. That'd be a horrible call if I called you. That would be my fault.

Yeah, that'd be bad. But that was abysmal. You just failed like that. Yeah. I'm not good at lying. Under pressure, at least. I was about to say, day-to-day lies, they're a breeze for you. You're like, oh, I don't have that drink.

Oh, shit. The drink's right there. But I don't think that's me lying. I think that's... No, it's... I think it's you don't care so much about it. You just blab the first thing that you think of. Yeah. And it ends up being an accidental lie. But it's you don't care so much about it you just blab the first thing that you think of yeah and it ends up being an accidental lie that's because but it's still a lie because

yeah I my bro my shoes literally are not over there in the corner because it's like my mind is so focused on more important shit that I don't think to like care yeah think about minuscule stuff like that. You don't care. Oh, my God. Dude, I'm actually hurt right now. I'd be in prison either way. Oh, yeah. I'd rather your butt than mine. I'm in jail either way. Yeah, I'd rather your butt than mine.

That's why. Would you take a bullet for me? Like an airsoft gun? Would you take a bullet for me? A real gun. Like a lethal. Someone has me 10 yards away, and you get this beautiful, this beautiful Channing Tatum, Jonah Hill moment.

All right, Joe. You can dive right in front of that bullet. Say the world goes slow-mo for you, and you literally have the option to get right in front of that bullet. Would you do it for me? If you think my timing is good enough for me to jump in front of a fast-ass bullet, I would jump for it. I would miss it. You'd in front of a fast-ass bullet, I would move. I would jump for it.

I would miss it. You'd still be dead. I got to try. You'd literally go, no, watch out. Wait, Mr. Gunman. You'd run and go. And he'd literally go. He'd double tap me.

You would just fall on concrete. You'd be like. And then you'd go, wait. Cam, no. And now you're go, wait, Cam, no. And now you're dead too. And now we both die. Because your timing's off. That's so sad.

What would you do if I died tomorrow? What would I do? What would you do if I died tomorrow? Indeed.com. I'd have to find somebody. It appears you need a job. No, I would cry. I would very much petition for your wife and your parents to let me taxidermy you.

I would very much. You would take a lot of stuffing but those hips i would be like if you if y'all bury him at least like cut off the hips and let me keep them i want to point out a fact i just asked you if my life ended tomorrow yeah i'd be pretty sad you said i'd be pretty sad. You said, I'd be pretty sad. I'd probably cry. Yeah. Okay? Two things about the sadness. This is making me kind of sad. You then said,

you would ask my family to taxidermy me. Yeah. You would immediately go on Indeed. And then? And what'd you say? You'd have to find

someone else to do the job? And I'd ask for your hips if they didn't let me stuff you. Now, this is the answer I was hoping for. Okay. Ask me.

If I died to bar, what would you do? This hoping for. Okay. Ask me. If I died tomorrow, what would you do? This is making me sad. I would be in complete, utter, abysmal, just isolated depression if you died tomorrow. I understand.

I don't give a damn how... You bastard! I don't give a damn how your funeral... I would want to take place in your funeral. I would want to speak at it. Of course, you would be starved.

I'd be crying. You son of a bitch. I'd be crying nonstop for weeks. Here we go. I go, he finally can't tell me no. I'd be crying nonstop for weeks. I don't give a shit what happens afterwards. Weeks?

Only weeks? You said i might cry it might you know my heart it needs help it needs surgery i can't even say i love you no he bro he let's talk about that oh i don't know when this turns so dark and twisted you turn this to a gloomy episode payton cannot tell me he loves me i do tell you i love you no you never do it you do when it when it's literally pulling teeth. No, that's not true. I damn near have to grab your haunches and smack you.

I'll call you anything if you do that. Oh, my God. I just realized that. What? In a serious way, you won't tell me you love me. That's not true. If I were to slightly arouse you, you'd say the heartbeat. That's not true.

Oh, my God. Well, when you arouse me. I mean nothing to you i'm fogged in the brain when i'm aroused guys he i'll be like all right like say after this we're gonna leave recording right go to each other's respective homes all right dog love you watch all right dog love you bro it was a great day he's like yeah bro what's another one all right bro hey appreciate it yeah i'll call you tomorrow morning whenever i wake up love you bro yeah you too dog it's never it's it's never ever and i love you and it's it honestly is starting to affect me all i do is all right bitch yeah yeah or that you're

lucky i'm giving y'all the damn censored version he'll be like all right you too yeah he does not because that's my way to tell me that's my way of showing love we're all different you can't tell me how to express my love we all if I'm not going to try to. If I verbally abuse you, that means I love you. If I pick on you, that means I love you. That is. If I'm like to Pierce. Pierce.

I'll be like. I'll be like, yeah, Pierce, love you, bro. I don't mean that. Oh, my God. Are you? Oh, Pierce looks so sad. Look at him. Pierce knows I love him.

No, it's just, I don't know. It's weird. Not weird for me. It's just hard for me. When I'm drunk, I'll say it easily. You say it a lot when you're drunk. But that's three people that don't lie to you. Drunk people, mad people, and kids.

Yeah. So if you're true heart of hearts, when you're drunk, you tell me you love me. I never hide the fact. We need to work on getting the day-to-day sober, Peyton. Just say it. I'm not hiding the fact that you know I love you. Okay, so calm the down. You want me to kiss you in the mouth every day too?

Don't try me. Okay, it's just hard for me. No, it's not like I don't, but this is where I say I love you. If I'm drunk or if there's a super big moment coming up. Like when we're all on stage. Like after shows, I say I love you all the time.

We come on stage, I love you. Before we go on stage, I say I love you. Every show I say I love you before we go on stage. So get off of me. What about that Tuesday night, 7 o'clock? Why do you want that? You have a wife. I know she loves me.

All right. She does a great job of telling me. Okay. Yeah, thank you. But does it not, everyone likes to hear it once in a while i tell you once in a while you just want i hear it once a month right before we get on stage hey love you bro good luck i'm like damn it that's what i get that doesn't give you a little boost before you get out there why was people's hairs so big in the 60s why was their hair so big that has been haunting me for the longest and i don't know why why was it so damn big that is a good point like when did that become a thing why was that i think there

was an overuse of hairspray but but i'm talking origin story. What's that movie, Hairspray? That's not nowhere near the same. I think it comes from the colonial days. They're trying to be like the founding fathers? Like the cool version. That's like the street wear version. So they were trying to have non-synthetic, natural wigs, but they were...

Think about it. Have you looked at pictures of your grandma from back in the day? I'm like, what the hell were you doing? Yeah, bro, I watched a video of my grandma. Her shit was...? I'm like, what the hell were you doing? Yeah, bro. I watched a video of my grandma. Her shit was... I don't know. Bro, my grandpa had a fro all the way to his dying day.

Yeah. Still had a head of hair. Okay. What if they brought that back? No. What if Liv one day came back from the barbershop? Where do girls go? The salon.

The hair salon. And she had like... Like... Massive hair. Not even like an afro because i for the good on her but i'm saying like a like just like it was like straight but curled and puffed and she had bay angs she had the bay oh look at that yes my god like like no offense to anyone's grandma in here but like big offense people really thought that was cute back then? Dude, a lot of shit from back then is not cool. At all. Like, but, okay, it's weird because we...

Yikes. Like, holy shit. Oh, they put those... No, it did come back for a little bit. The bump it. Holy shit, Liv, yes. I wore a bump it. No, you f***ing didn't.

Liv wore a bump it? I don't even know what that is. It was like this clip you put in the back of your head and it goes like this it looks like you wore that dumb shit for cheer didn't you you wore for cheer

with your red lipstick yep now I know oh that's Nazer Liv looked like a piranha in one of her pictures with that red lipstick she was like sorry love you babe

no bump it that did so the big hair did come back for a little bit it died out that's when infomercials were hot when every every commercial was like the the magical floating ball and all that okay the bump it's were a part of it i want to share one more thing i like when you share with me i had a shower thought the other day was it about me unfortunately

no that's all my thoughts on you though so it's an invention tell me i don't know if it's ever happened i don't know if it's ever happened. I don't know if it's ever been a thought. Tell me this doesn't make sense. Okay. You know how

barbers give fades, right? Yes. Okay. Obviously, you get oh my God. I get a good fade. Shout out to Brooks.

When are you going to go to Brooks? I'll go soon, I promise. You said that this past year. In the summertime. Okay. In the summertime.

Pipe down, Helga. In the summertime, I'll be going. You can't live Helga so much. Who's Helga? Her literal alias. Yeah, her alter pipe down Helga! In the summertime, I'll be going. You can't live Helga so much. Who's Helga? Her literal alias. Yeah, her alter ego is Helga. Why?

What is Helga? A viking that could jump off of a boat and invade another country. That's her when she gets angry for no reason. That's a good point. She's like... And I just go like this. What? Her shit does look squinted on that left side. And I just go like this.

Her shit does look squinted on that left side. Alright, Helga. She's not invading any country today. She's not invading shit. Alright, so your invention. You know how barbers give fates? Yes. Right?

They gotta go to one. Reclip. Sure, I didn't go to barber school. Okay. Tell me if this sounds even slightly realistic. Okay. Imagine a clipper. A big head on it.

You can adjust the size because people have different size heads. They have those. Everything's invented so far that you're saying. But it's layered. The guard itself. They have those. No. Yes, they do.

No, I'm talking about they put it on. There's a switch on the side. No, that's the switch. That's all the switches. So you're saying with one foul swoop, you have a... With one swoop, it's going one, twos, and threes. That's hard. That's hard. That's hard.

Did I think of something? We might cut it out. That's stupid. Are you kidding me? Bro, so they either have to move the blade to go up to it. Like, they have a guard that can go one to six, right? They clip it, move the blade. So without clipping, you don't get a full fade.

I'm talking about without touching anything. You go like this, you have a fade. The guard itself. I know what he's talking about. Draw it on the whiteboard. That wouldn't make any sense. Imagine a big-ass guard, okay? It's like a half here,.75 here, into a one, into a one and a half,

and it ends at a two i like it so you literally start from the top at the two it's going to be right here and you go slowly as you're going up you have to do one full slow movement the whole thing's already faded you know what a better invention would be is that not if you could mold your lips and then i could kiss you and you would feel it okay without getting too much have you seen that one thing oh? Yeah, that's fire. We want to get one for us Yeah, yeah, no no absolutely okay, so so say I molded my lips right okay? And I gave them to you and their electronic patent lips. I would use it as a anger management tool

You'd bite me no I punch it you punch you in the mouth whenever I got too angry. And that's the difference. I'd make sweet kisses. I would never do that. I would never kiss them either. The You Should Know Podcast. This episode is brought to you by our friends at FitBod. Everyone has their own gym routine

and necessities they need. Sure do. Me, myself, and I, my good old red elastic band to get nice and stretched, and some headphones. Gotta have some agua. But you know what is truly, truly the essential your workout needs?

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No, no, no. They're going to show the hinge at the hips. They're going to show how low you should be getting. FitBot has a demo for every exercise, and it makes it so simple. We had a leg day the other day at the gym. We used FitBot, and I'm not going to lie, I'm having a hard time walking. But it was one of the most fulfilling workouts, and I feel like I left the gym accomplished, and I did the right things.

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science to you. And like we've already mentioned, there's over a thousand demo videos in the app showing you exactly how to do each and every exercise. Yeah, you can learn movements the right way. Add FitBod to your workout essentials. Join FitBod today to get your personalized workout plan get 25 off your subscription or try the app free at fitbod.me slash ysk that's f-i-t-b-o-d dot m-e slash ysk now on to the rest of the episode you should know podcast i think i want to help some people out

are you in the world yes i think uh positive yeah. Are you sure? In the world, yes. Are you positive? Yeah, because the love in the world is just, it's not where it's supposed to be, and I think the best love doctor needs to help it out. Hit it. Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P!

Dr. P! Dr. P! All right P. Dr. P. All right, Lord, I have the submission, sire. All right, what is it? Are you ready? Yes. Dear Dr. P. Hello.

I've been dating this girl for almost a month, and she never wants... I've been dating this girl for almost a month, and she never wants to be around me anymore, and is always with her guy best friend. And the only time we talk is at school or over text. I don't know what to do anymore. Go ahead and crush this little heart.

I'm going to put like an age restriction on Dr. B. Look, bro. Look, bro. Got it. You just got to rip the bandaid off. With these kids, man. Rip it off. You've known her for a month

No I've been dating for a month Let's assume they've known each other for a year Let's just assume it Dating for a month She has a guy best friend He's kissing her a lot He's kissing her tongue mouth A lot of boy and girl tongue

Mixing A lot of boy and girl tongue I'm so sorry It's Dr. P I'm honest No it's true. I'm not trying to be mean. You're spitting facts.

Bro, it's done. You're cooked. You're in the gulag. You have to fight your way back. No, don't fight your way back, bro. Leave. Leave with dignity. Let her run. Just be like, hey, bro. fight your way back, bro. Leave. Leave with dignity. Let her run.

Just be like, hey, bro. Tell her, hey, bro, I'm not getting the attention I think I deserve. You're a great girl. I had a great time. Sorry if this isn't what you wanted, but I feel like I'm not getting respected the way I wanted in this relationship. I'm going to choose to end it. And I'm 12 years old, too, so I'm going to have algebra 2 next period.

Let's go. One more. Here we go. Hey, Dr. P. Hello. I've been talking to this girl for about a month. No. Alright, one more. Hey Dr. P. Hello. I've been talking to this girl for about a month. No. What's with these one month relationships? Y'all have problems, bro. And she says she's high class and she only

wants Prada and Dulce and Gabbana. And only likes to eat at high end restaurants and wants a G-Wagon. With all that being said, I don't think I could provide for her the way that she wants me to. Send her to Dr. P. I could really use some advice.

What should I do? Yo, you like that girl? In one month, she's asking for G-Wagons, Pradas, and high-end. Bro, she doesn't... this girl literally leave her who cares yeah bro if you don't have that don't feel bad about it and if she's not willing to be there for you whenever you're in the grind of getting to where you want to be the levers cool if she's

not cool going to applebee's two for 20s or whatever ever a job no i was waiting for that i'm just kidding bro that's shallow that's messed up you don't deserve that um i mean i don't know what if he does have it though what if he has it what if he has it like that i think he might no he doesn't because he said he can't provide for it you know we're helping we're helping young guns today yeah last one here we go all right here we go and this one's more of a it's very short You know, we're helping young guns today. Last one. Here we go. And this one's more of a, it's very short. Okay.

I feel so bad. Dear Dr. P, I just turned 18, and the longest I've ever been in a relationship was for less than 48 hours. What the fuck is happening? Hey, it's a special young edition. It's the young Edition this week. His question is, how do I keep

relationships? There are so many lost souls on this Discord. There is lost souls. He's 18. His longest relationship is two days. No, he says less.

He hasn't made it through two nights. He hasn't made it through a weekend. God. Literally, I swear to God, look, that's the whole thing. There's nothing else. It just says, how can I keep a relationship? Oh, bro. And then it says, P.S., here's my phone number.

Like, you're going to shoot him tips. No. No shot. Call? Yeah. Do you start 67 so I just have your number? The You Should Know Podcast. All right, guys.

We got the number in. Obviously, you're not allowed to hear that part. Here we go. We're making the call. Oh. Oh. Oh, heaven. Who am I calling?

It might be a girl. Hello? who am i calling it might be a girl hello hi this is dr p who is who is this hi this is molly hi molly molly i'm dr p i'm here with uh secretary cam yeah you're on the podcast right now we just got your uh we got your dr p submission right and we have some questions yeah okay so your dr p reads um dear dr p i just turned 18 and the longest i've ever been in a could handle him for 48 hours. Oh, so it wasn't your fault. Oh, so you just didn't like the guy. Yeah, no, he was so annoying.

Okay, okay. Is this your only experience in that realm? Yeah. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah? Oh, okay. Well, this is what Dr. P would give you. The best love doctor in the world. Are you in an airplane? Are you in a hurricane, Molly? What is that? Are you swimming? You need to be seeking shelter, Molly.

No, I'm outside walking my dog. Is there a tornado where you live? No, it's just so windy here. What breed of dog? I have a golden doodle. Oh, that's a great dog. Hey, Molly, that's what I would start with. You know what I'm saying?

You take that golden doodle pup, right? You take that golden doodle pup. You go to your local dog park, right? Once you're at your local dog park you find another boy with a nice shih tzu right or maybe a golden retriever and you let those dogs kiss you kiss those dogs and then and then you go up to that owner and you go i want to kiss you like my dog's kissing you i wouldn't do that molly i wouldn't start there i wouldn't yeah i don't i don't think i would be too comfortable doing that oh I wouldn't start there. I wouldn't. Oh.

You never disrespect a love doctor. Never, Molly. You hear me? This is doctor. This is. It's not Peyton. It is Dr. P. I am a world. It's not. P. I am a world

It's not pain Pain is dr. P. No She couldn't even keep that phone call For two and a half hours Or 48 hours You lost a subscriber One day up Oh my gosh The worst part is You think it's hilarious Yo okay Molly

Peyton would never do that It was Dr. P Dr. P felt Yo, okay, Molly. Peyton would never do that. It was Dr. P. Dr. P felt disrespected. I've worked at my craft forever. I just got off the PJ. You listened to the doctor. I got off my PJ from the Bahamas with 83 Instagram models. And you didn't take my advice.

And I was really trying to get you some love. Okay, well now talk to Molly from... Hold on. That was... Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P! Dr. P!

Dr. P. Please, God, talk to Molly from Peyton. Because she is in shambles right now. Molly, this is Peyton talking to you. I could never give you advice. I'm not a good love doctor. But my advice would be to take Dr. P's advice. She couldn't use any advice.

I gave her advice. I didn't give her advice. Dr. P gave her advice. I heard it. Now I think it's time for people's favorite segment. I'm going to call Molly after this. Everybody in the comments is freaking out. I'm going to call her after we record. Everybody relax.

Molly, we love you. Pop culture. Pop culture. Pop culture. Pop culture. Pop culture. Ryan Garth. I'm just kidding. We're not getting into that. Speaking of the fighting world, though, I know that was a joke.

Well, hell, this episode will come out Monday, but it's obviously we're recording getting into that. I have, speaking of the fighting world though, I know that was a joke. Well, hell, this episode will come out Monday, but it's obviously we're recording it prior. This Friday and Saturday, Friday, Anthony Joshua

and Francis Ngannou. That should be good. That is going to be nuts. The press conference is today. I am cheering for AJ. I've always, I mean, I like Francis too,

but I've always been a true fan to AJ. So I want AJ. When we met him at the mall, he's a big boy. He said, y'all do sport. Y'all do sport. I said, used to. You, but I've always been a true fan to AJ. So I want AJ. When we met him at the mall, he was a big boy. He said, y'all do sport. Y'all do sport. I said, used to. You look like a tank.

Anyway, I want AJ to win on Friday night. That's going to be crazy. And then we literally get to stay up late Friday watching that, wake up, and then Saturday, Sugar Sean O'Malley headlines UFC 299. I want 12 beers and some fried pickles. And we'll be exactly where you know that's going to take place to indulge in that. But we're not going to tell y'all. I love sugar.

Well, I guess we could tell y'all because it's already going to be past. No, because we're going to go to more fights. That's very true. So we're going to go to our place there and watch that. And I'm very excited for this weekend

for both of those. Good old fight weekend. Great fight weekend. Great fight weekend. There is... Let's talk about a movie, right? Dune 2 came out. I'm hearing crazy reviews. Great reviews for Dune 2. I don't know his name. I haven, right? Dune 2 came out. I'm hearing crazy reviews.

Great reviews for Dune 2. I don't know his name. I haven't even seen Dune 1. I haven't seen Dune 1. I'm going to watch it, and then we're all going to go watch Dune 2 in theaters. But they're saying, I don't know his name, but the villain in Dune 2, they're saying he's Heath Ledger, Joker. That's Austin Butler.

Elvis. You know who Austin Butler is? Sure. You know who Austin Butler is? No, I'm talking about his name in the universe. Oh, yeah, I don't know. Cryo. Yeah, something like that.

Like Proximus or whatever. Whatever the hell his name is. He's a great actor. They said the performance he gave in Dune 2 is like Heath Ledger, Joker level. Yeah, I think now I get a little... Austin Butler's a great actor. actor great actor i saw him in elvis fantastic the way he did that role crazy he's always been good i think a lot of those articles that come out now i'm not gonna say it but i haven't seen the movie so i don't know i

would say a lot of those are pr a lot of the pr teams for these movies they do that and they say like oh this and it gets people excited for the movie so i don't know i agree with that i'm talking about from tiktok bro people's personal the tiktok movie reviewers right no just random people talking about it some of them some of them are some of them are what it's what are their what are their tiktoks like i don't remember the accounts i'm saying like what is there like have you seen any of their other videos oh all their videos i'm talking about just straight up on the timeline it would come across i know i'm saying those so if you look at those no i'm not gonna ruin these people's bags but a lot of it is pr yeah so i don't know i'm just saying whenever i see that now when it first happened like whenever it's to this person's like

heath ledger i'd be like holy shit but now i just take it i understand that it's marketing and all that shit but i haven't seen the first Dune. I started watching it about a year ago. It was just way different than what I expected. And I was already tired when I started watching it. I fell asleep, but I haven't gone back to it. So I need to watch it. And the reason I didn't finish it is because they promoted the shit out of Zendaya for the rollout of that movie.

And I heard she was in it for like three minutes for the first one, so I was a little mad. I was like, you're already trying to play me, and I don't like when you try to play me. I don't like playing me. That's why Molly got banged on. But yeah, I'm excited to see Dune 2,

or Dune 1 for that fact. We gotta find Dune 1 and then go watch Dune 2. Oh, I have a website. We'll sit in the back. We'll sit in the back. Yeah. And that was... Pop Culture Pay Nick Kim! Pop Culture Pay Nick Kim! Bow! we'll all sit we'll sit in the back we'll sit in the back yeah and that was pop culture pay

pop culture pay nick cam bow get us out of here all right everybody episode 103 next week's episode episode 104 if you do your math right what is 104 divided by 2 52 how many weeks are in a year 52 so what does that mean hello happy. Two years strong of doing this. So we absolutely love y'all. Can't wait to see you next week. Episode 104. This week's secret code. Confuse the casuals.

Confuse everybody else that's not as real and real as you. And to get your good karma is G-E-S. G-E-S. I, G-E-S. I don't know. What does that mean? Gooey ear syndrome. I knew it was something about ears. It's something about syndrome.

Gooey ear syndrome. Gooey ear syndrome. Peyton has it. That's disgusting. Six years in keloids. Anyway, he still loves y'all. His hair looks crazy, but he still loves y'all. We have this tour, dates and tickets coming very, very soon.

Follow us on the Instagrams and all that. All the Instagrams down below. Twitch. Wednesday. Next Wednesday. The first. No, this Wednesday. I'm so sorry.

Yes, this comes out Monday. This Wednesday, two days from now, Twitch. Look in the description below. It's going to take you to his channel. Wednesday night, am I assuming? Yeah, probably like 6 or 7. Wednesday evening, Wednesday night, the inaugural, the first one, the amazing opening Twitch session will happen.

Patreon has all sorts of stuff coming to it. Go check out the Austin vlog. We talk about how amazing the Austin show was. There's a recap extended episode, and the vlog is out on Patreon right now. Go look at those. Conspiracy episode 3, Y'all absolutely love them. It is coming very, very soon and much, much more. Also, again, I'm going to say it every single week.

The official Facebook is the one right here. There's like 20 of them out there. The official one is the one with that link. You're going to click that link. It only takes you to one. That's the official one. But enough of that. Guys, we love you so much.

And remember, one out of two koala bears don't make it home to Christmas. And we will see you next time. Ka-pow. Ka-chow. Lightning McQueen. You don't smell that bad. You smell bad. We're trying to call Molly back.

Hopefully she doesn't hate us. Hopefully she knows it was Dr. P and not Peyton. I'm going to leave her voicemail just in case. There you go. Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice messaging system. We're going to mute this so that her number doesn't get leaked. There you go. At the tone, please record your message.

When you finish recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options. Hey, it's Peyton and Cam. Cam, say hello. Hey, Molly. When you finish recording, you may hang up or press 1 for more options.