You Should Know Podcast - WE TAKE AN IQ TEST! -You Should Know Podcast-

Episode Date: December 2, 2024

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We love you. Now on to the rest of the episode so you've always been picky about your produce but now you find yourself checking every label to make sure it's canadian so be it at sobeys we always pick guaranteed fresh canadian produce first restrictions apply in-store or online for details. We got co-host Cam back in the studio. Dirty fire dancing on the dance floor. Whoa.

Uh-oh. I do like how you do on the dance floor. I can move that ass. Okay. Well, first bleep of the day. Round of applause for Cam. I can move that ass. We can say ass. We can say ass. Not in the first five minutes. Well, okay. All right. I can move that tush. It Well, first bleep of the day. Round of applause for Cam. I can move that ass. We can say ass. We can say ass.

Not in the first five minutes. Well, okay. All right. I can move that tush. It's okay. You already said it. It's all right. We love you.

You are dressed. How old are you? I'm 26. You're dressed like a seventh grader. No, I'm not. I have sweatpants on with my Michael Jordan Air Flight 11 Lowe's and a shirt of Darth Maul, one of the greatest Sith Lords of all time. He is.

I might be in the eighth grade. I might escape from a field trip. It's okay. I love you. How was your week, Bubba? It was Thanksgiving, and I know Big Beck Bootylicious Cam was all about Thanksgiving. I know you didn't leave a plate with an ounce of food on it. I had fourths.

I didn't have seconds. I didn't have thirds. I had fourths. I didn't have seconds. I didn't have thirds. I had fourths. Do you remember last year Thanksgiving? We talked about Thanksgiving, and I exposed you for going to the neighbor's houses and asking to go places. Did you do that again this year?

I did not do that. That never happened. No, you didn't do that this year, but you went to the local kitchens wherever they were giving food to the less fortunate, and you pretended you needed food because you wanted more food, right? So actually it's strange that didn't that never happened and then um am i am i answering about my week or are we just calling me fat because

either way i'm fine i'm game either way but i did not go to a soup kitchen and ask for some jambalaya i did not do that i did not jambalaya. I did not do that. I did not do that. Jambalaya on Thanksgiving would be wicked. I bet they have it in New Orleans. I guarantee you. That'd be fire. To me, jambalaya is one of those foods... See, now I sound fat. You got me my fat back. Jambalaya is one of those foods there's not

a time or place for it. If it's in front of me, I'm eating it. I'm not a jambalaya type of girl. Oh my god, it's so good. I don't know spices. I'm not a spice kind of girl. You're a bland. You're like mashed potatoes with no butter, no cheese, no bacon, no chives, and no sour cream. Chives? Chives.

There's a girl in seventh grade, I believe, had chives. She missed class for it, I think. Is that a real disease? Chives? Hives. Hives. I get hives when I'm anxious. You get anxious hives?

Yeah, when I'm stressed. Where at? Oh, my arms. Oh, okay. Yeah, my arms and my neck. That's less cool. Yeah, yeah. You break out into hives?

Yeah, recently. Yeah, I'm going into nutritionist. And I'm the seventh grader. Yeah. You break, your skin can't even hold its integrity when you start to think too much. I don't have enough white blood cells, I think. Be careful. I got a lot of black blood cells.

Thanksgiving was fantastic. The food was great on. So, a thing about me, I actually get three Thanksgivings every year. Oh, that's great to have a split family household. No, it's not. But it's really good for my stomach and my capacity. we have lives dad lives mom and uh my parents yeah diving into a quick story about you know my local thanksgiving here go talk about it so our intern

pierce you know he has the affiliation i believe his grandfather big high up maybe owns it don't know the thing but greenberg turkeys remember how he sent those to us oh yes okay so he sends the turkeys it arrives to my parents house in a box strange i call pierce hey what's the cooking uh directions how long do i cook it oh it's already cooked no no okay so immediately don't do that i don't know about that and i go okay well how long do i heat it up for you guys oh you don't i go pierce it's 44 degrees outside and there's a large dead bird in a box on my father's doorstep, and you want me to eat it straight after using a box cutter. He goes, yeah, bro, if you heat it up, it'll dry it out.

And I go, I don't know what barbaric Thanksgiving he has. He instructed me to have cold turkey, cold turkey on Thanksgiving. That is against the law. First of all, we got sponsorships like HelloFresh, Factor, like all those, right? Yeah. They send food to the front door in a UPS box, right? You cut it open, you put it in a fridge, and then you heat it up when you want to eat it.

Because, I don't know, food's good warm, hot, how it's supposed to be eaten. The fact that he said, and turkeys are big, especially those turkeys. It's a thick turkey. Eight pounds of turkey. Eight pounds of turkey. Eight pounds of feline. No, foul.

Foul. Foul. Not a foul ball, but foul with a W. Strike. Eight pounds of foul on my door with tape on it. Yep. I'm not putting that direct to table there's no shot in hell he literally said that i said all right bro like we're like just tell me yeah he goes no i'm

serious eat it cold and i said who are you yeah no okay that's bullshit can we say i i might say this every uh thanksgiving episode but i mean it when I say it. I'm not a... Turkey is ass. Can I say that? Turkey is not ass. Turkey is not ass. Turkey is not ass. You probably like the brown sugar ham, don't you?

Yeah, that's the best. Oh, my God. Yeah, because it's sweet. Hey, eat the protein and like it for its taste. No, ham. This is my thing. You can run your Thanksgiving plate, and I'll run my Thanksgiving plate. Okay.

My Thanksgiving plate is like this. Ham. Mm-hmm. Yam. Mm-hmm. Got the ham and the yam. Ham and yam. That's all you need.

Ham and yam. Gotta have. Right? And then rolls. Gotta have rolls. Good rolls. Two to three rolls. Oh, there you go.

Two to three rolls. We're big girls. And then a little bit of collard greens. Mm-hmm. That's it. Diet Coke sweet tea to drink. So you have two different drink options and you only have two to three side dishes for Thanksgiving.

I'm not a stuffing. I don't know. I don't know what stuffing is. I don't respect it. I don't want that. Thank you. Okay. No,

leprechaun stop. You shut up and listen. You get turkey, you get ham, you get yams, you get mash, you get mac and cheese, you get greens,

you get some sort of casserole. It might be a Caucasian thing. There's typically casseroles there. You get stuffing or dressing, depending on how it was made, and there is a difference. What's the— Okay, sorry to interrupt you. And then you get rolls, and then you get drinks, and you don't mix your drinks like a freak bag. You stick to one, and you respect the plate.

The reason I was trying to cut him off is because he's wearing gray sweats and he's talking about food and i saw a little i saw something move and i'm not sure what that is either your phone's buzzing or you're a little excited about the food what's the purple shit the purple jelly cranberry what is that it's good what is that it's cramp you eat that just cramp it's like a cramp. It's not a sorbet, but it's just like a spread. You just fork that, John? No, you don't just shove it down your gullet. That looks wicked.

Good morning to you. No, you put it on the turkey. You put it on your... Oh! Yeah. Jam on Turk? See, you don't even like Turk, though. You're not...

Okay, no, there's a new mandate going in. You're not allowed to call me young. You're not allowed to call me young. I've never called you young. You started today's episode saying I looked like a seventh grader. Yeah, because of the way you dress. You're about to be a father. That's offensive.

Were you going to wear turtlenecks and slacks? Honestly, you need to start maturing your dressing up. No, I do. I do. But I want to be that cool dad. Yes. That dad that's like, hey, if you need an extra, I can play. No, you can be the cool dad.

I don't know. You can be the cool dad, but also not the dad that's like, is he underdeveloped? What's going on? Okay, I'm not underdeveloped. I'm not underdeveloped. Nothing's – maybe my mid – now that – now, okay. Now, when you dropped your head, I can understand why that isn't sensitive.

But I need you all to know from the bottom of my heart, I did not. Don't worry, it's getting muted of my heart i did not don't worry it's getting muted okay i did not mean that but overall thanksgiving fantastic black friday shopping though can we speak on it real quick it's dead black friday's dead it is murked nuked it's cooked it's it's done i saw tiktok and it broke down it was a comedy skit but it broke down the timeline of how black fr Friday slowly got worse. Years ago, they did, okay, we're going to push it back a little bit. We're going to push it back to like 11 p.m. on Thanksgiving.

Just to get more sales or whatever. Then it went to like 4 p.m. on Thanksgiving. And then it went to, on Thanksgiving,m on thanksgiving yeah and then it went to on things on thanksgiving that's when black friday starts we're in thursday but black friday starting on thursday and then they turned it to online bro and so black friday is online now throughout the whole week black friday the the magic of it is gone it's so gone and there's no more magic there's no little freaking freckle fairy dust there's none of that. I miss going down to an outlet mall and seeing people box over the coach bags.

Yes. I want to see you fight over the coach bags. Yes. Fight. Yes. Bro, I miss. I literally saw an elderly woman get shoved over a toothbrush in a local Target. That's the sport.

That's the beauty of Black Friday. Hit Bernice down yeah we don't need her shove that little boy down to get your little seven dollar dvd if they can't fight over it they don't deserve it yeah and dude and then okay amazon right amazon was fantastic pre the pandemic post pandemic they're they're a mastermind okay they won't lose to anyone right amazon's black friday started last last monday two mondays the monday of actually no it started the like it started the thursday that's what it started the thursday before thanksgiving right an entire week hundreds of hours to not only not have to and that's another thing i don't think people are cut out for it people don't want the grind yeah no one wants to run no more city of being in your little

comfy little stupid little sweaters and your slippers we're turning to the things from wally yes bro we're gonna be just fat nobodies cruising through the galaxy sitting with robot you're you're just missing the galaxy part so i'm a fat nobody hanging with the robot you mean i fell down the stairs at my house why did you do that with my weight but i was uh we were folding uh our soon-to-be sons clothes and i literally was walking down in my house slippers i slipped airborne six steps down that's hot slipper fell off toes got jammed in between the metal pipes and i want to show you the bruising i'm not kidding like it's not it's not a horrendous bruising but oh it happened you see that you see that bruising right on that oh my god no i can't get over the top okay okay there we go oh yeah i can't get over the goddamn toe i can't get over the toe bad but

just take oh my god Oh, my God. Take a quick gander. Cam, okay, can I be honest with you? Can I be honest with you? Oh, it's on the bottom side of the other toe as well. Dude, you need to go to the doctor. No, it hurt like hell. You have a big hoof.

It hurt like hell. You see that? Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, no. It smells like citrus. Had a fun time with an orange this morning. Okay. I was going to say something about your feet, but I forgot.

You said they were big and gross. No, but it was something else. No, let's recap the episode so far. I'm fat. I'm a nobody. I got big, gross hooves, and i dress like a seventh grader no your turn to get on me that's co-host cam my turn yeah get on me no you're beautiful you're beautiful uh you look great you smell great and i love you okay thank you um but there's so

we were talking about thanksgiving food and there's a lot of thanksgiving food i don't like i don't respect it half y'all are nasty and don't bring plates over to my house. I don't know what goes on in your house. I don't know if you wash your dishes and your kids gross me out. And your pet is ugly. So that's all I gotta say. I'm sorry. If you got an ugly pet, you can't cook for me. If it can climb

on counters. I'm not gonna say what kind of animal that is. If your animal can climb on counters. I'm not eating your food. It can like Jiminy Cricket into your cabinets i don't want it you're she's gonna think it's a little lint ball poop oh my god yeah don't cook for me yeah no but also on thanksgiving i did something new right i've i've been getting into selfishness i've really been practicing it that is you're just now getting into it just now you just started you just bought the crash course of selfishness you think i've

been selfish no yeah i know you know no no no you haven't no but um no but okay so i my biggest pet peeve on thanksgiving is when my food touches i don't want my food touching dude that's gross to me that's like that's elementary to me and it want my food touching. That's gross to me. That's elementary to me, and it's foul. It's gross behavior. Those liquids shouldn't be touching. I don't like mixing of juices. I don't want a different color palette.

What liquids do you have on your plate? Like the yam liquid and the collard green liquid. I don't want that touching. You're so... It's gross. No, it's not. Continue. It's like I don't want to create art. It's all going to the same place. The plate is art.

It doesn't matter. The plate is art. And I take a bite of one thing, swallow it, bite it, and the other thing, so I don't mix foods in my mouth, and I don't put drinks in my mouth when there's food in there. That's gross, and that's gluttony, and you're going to hell. So that's not what you should do. But I practice a new thing where I get different plates.

I had a plate for yams. I had a plate for collard greens. I had a plate for turkey. I had a plate for everythingams. I had a plate for collard greens. I had a plate for turkey. I had a plate for everything else. I don't want my food touching. I had like six plates at one time. Did you have a helper over your shoulder too? What do you mean? Why do you have six plates? I don't want to touch it. I don't want my food touching. Okay, one thing that that confirmed is your Thanksgiving is small and that's fine. You've said you had a small family yeah but the second thing we're dead this so the second take that back this nope the second thing that confirms is uh you either weren't spanked enough or your family is blinded by love what do you mean i'm 25 they can't say

anything to me now i would expect your dad to take those plates if i was your father let's do that if i was your father and you sat down, you came back home and you sat down on my table in a house you grew up on and you had six plates for six different things. I'd literally go... What's the issue? Why are you wasting plates?

The paper. Don't care. Why are you wasting them? They're supposed to be used. We bought those for Thanksgiving. There's no such thing as a one plate for one side dish. There's six people at a Thanksgiving and we bought a 200-pack of plates. I can use six plates. Then y'all have bad logistic problems as well. You're buying way too much, way too much paper plates.

That's, Peyton, you're not hearing yourself, bro. What? You're not hearing yourself. You would be scolded at so many Thanksgivings. Do you understand that? If a girl brought, oh oh my god a girl brings you to the thanksgiving right yeah here's my boyfriend payton uh yeah he's he's doing really good for himself i don't really want to talk about let's just have thanksgiving okay oh hey i'm paying

oh i'm paying i'm getting high hey can i get your wi-fi you mind if i get your wi-fi code like right now can i get your wi-fi and then you? Can I get your Wi-Fi? And then you finally sit down. And imagine a girl's father watches you go greens. Mashed potatoes. Yams. Yes. He'd ground his daughter, no matter the age. Okay.

He would ground her for speaking. First of all, if I go to somebody, I'm never going to somebody else's Thanksgiving unless we're married, or we've been dating for like four years. But if I'm like... If you're dating for three years, it's a no-go. No-go. Four years, we can't.

I'm saying, if I'm going to somebody's, a girl's house, I'm saying, I ate already. I ate at my house. I'm just coming here to meet you. Dude, we need to help you for real. Why? No, we need to help you for why no we

need to help you i'm not eating at a foreign person's house why oh what if you walked in they had a dog looks like you just be like a like a oh now that yeah no that came out okay hold on what if you walked in they just had a just an ugly dog like okay oh oh here we go we're gonna mix it all together okay you've been dating that you've been dating the girl for four and a half years so she crosses the threshold you have not she crossed the the threshold she has not uh you have not eaten today so far you are blessing her with your appearance they don't have wi-fi you can't be on your phone and your hives are taken care of good morning okay you go in there and the first thing you see is a mutilated dog yeah a dog that is just gross yeah absolutely like'm talking, there's slobber. Yeah.

His teeth are like that. It's like, how did that thing not get the needle yet? Yes. But. Too much? No, I like it. I like it. But the dog is beautiful and it loves you.

It loves you like Ruby. Oh, yeah. Like it has a deep love. But you're walking through the house, you see little balls of fur on the ground. Oh, God, no. Maybe a little piss corner. Oh, my. You see a little potty pad, but the dog's nine years's nine years old okay yeah all these things are going in your mind and

you go and look at that food yeah do you eat or not no are you crazy okay okay mama let's say her name i don't even care her name the mom of the girl yeah she goes now darling i i heard you um uh savannah told me i haven't ate yet not savannah what do you want something more uh what do you want some more latrice said i'm just kidding i'm kidding jacqueline said you haven't eaten yet okay jacqueline said y'all hadn't eaten yet darling go ahead and make your plate please oh no man i'm not with that guy i said make your plate that's i said i said make your plate i'd be like oh i'm so sorry i didn't know that i was coming here to eat she jacqueline is bad at explaining you know her i was like so i eat. Jacqueline is bad at explaining.

You know her. I was like, so I ate at my house before. But I'm full. But I'm probably, I'm a big girl, you know. Just give me a couple 38 minutes. Okay. A couple 30 minutes. Yeah, Jacqueline, go get your father's belt.

If somebody tried to whoop me. I said make a plate. Oh, I'd be like, all right, I'm leaving. Jacqueline, go lock the door. You're like a horror film. You would still, you're a bastard. Do you believe,

do you, okay, do you have awkward dinner conversations at Thanksgiving? Yes. Really, about what?

Well, not really, but well, it's just when there's dead silence and everyone's eating and you're just hearing and then someone's like,

so, oh, your Thanksgiving sucked. Here we go again. What do y'all have, a DJ booth set up? You got a DJ f***ing cranking vibes. You're sitting there with Hennessy and Coke. Okay, God, I'm, it's bad.

I'm painting a bad picture. You got a DJ, you got margaritas, and y'all are living the dream. No, we're talking. You and your five others with your 40 plates y'all having a shindig a whole party okay sorry my family loves each other we like to communicate that's fine you're talking what are y'all talking i feel like at your thanksgivings y'all talking about political things no shot we go so you hear that new tax administration let's really go help this year's quarterly earnings. Pass the water.

Can you pass the water? Can you pass the salt? I need a refill on that water. No, he said he's going to do that new thing, though. No, genuinely, what do y'all talk about? Bro, same shit. Family stuff. How's the kids been?

What's the wrestling like? Da-da-da-da-da-ba-da-be-da-boom. No, I'm saying your Thanksgiving. Oh. Yeah, yeah. Not Liv's dad's Thanksgiving. Your Thanksgiving. Just friendly family stuff. Like, how's everything been?

What's new? And then it kind of dies off. But it's fun. How long do y'all sit at the table? It's a great time. 25 minutes. Really? No, no, no.

Oh, my God. I'd probably say 45. You know what I don't like? And then everyone kind of disperses a little bit. People want seconds to come back. And there is talking. I just can't think on top of my head. You know what's been weird since the podcast?

I don't like that I'm mostly the center of conversation now. I don't like that. I don't want to talk about the podcast. Amen. I'm like, hey, football. Cowboys play today, right? They're like, yeah, but when you make that one. It's like, why'd you tell that joke about me? I'd be like, look at your molars.

You go, Earl, they got Dennis to the DMV? Yeah. Oh, I found it. Why'd you make that joke about me? I'd be like, you can bite through a door. The You Should Know Podcast. It's truck month at GMC. Tackle the open road with added confidence in a 2025 Sierra 1500 Pro Graphite

at 0% financing for up to 72 months. With an available 5.3 liter V8 engine, 20 inch high gloss black painted aluminum wheels, off-road suspension with available 2 inch factory installed lift kit, plus a towing capacity of up to 13,200 pounds, you'll be ready for anything this Truck Month. Truck Month is on now. Ask your GMC dealer for details. No, my cousins have never come to a Thanksgiving.

Oh. I feel so bad because the white people in my family, this can stay. I feel bad because the white people in my family come over and they try to participate in bringing a dish. It's always full by the time. There's like one-tenth of the dish missing when they take it home. They're like, oh, I guess no one liked my cornflake stew or something like that.

It's like, are you kidding me? I got roasted marshmallow with sugar-glazed yams, and you want me to get your broccoli and cheddar rice casserole? Get out of town are you nuts hey bring something that has more than 200 calories a serving and i might indulge okay all right 100 that was a great thanksgiving topic recap with thanksgiving we hope everyone had a great thanksgiving let's talk about food more because i know it's your favorite topic oh my god um i love tj maxx and ross food and so many people get on me for that that's bullshit that is

utter bullshit at the checkout line of tj maxx and ross whenever they have like that assortment of just like random foods you get pretzels you can get gummies you can get crabby patties anything and they're oftentimes hard as a coin no biting into a penny but it's like the excitement it's like treasure it's like you are gonna buy this and you don't know the expiration scratched out on it yeah exactly you take it home you don't know if you're gonna wake up with salmonella or covid literally or just have a good night yeah that's bullshit why does that excite you because it's good when you do get a good batch from ross you know it's fire i've i've bought one food item from ross and i think i threw up i i think I threw up that same night. It was like a peanut cluster turtle something.

Why? I don't know. I don't buy food from Ross. I think it's the most slept on. It's a resale store. So let's think about actually what happened. That was on a shelf somewhere where food is sold. Yes.

No one bought it, so they sent it to Ross for f***s like you and me to get hungry, waiting in the line for 40 minutes, and then make a bold decision. The only bad thing about the Ross food is the water. Have you ever had Ross water? Like, they have those big glacier waters in the tin. It's like, if you crack it, it sounds like a Diet Coke. Like, it's like...

It foams. I'm like... Hell no. No, Ross food is the most slept on food ever. What are you getting from Ross? You're saying food. There's snacks. You better not be buying

meals at Ross. Oh, no. But I get Krabby Patty gummies. It's my go-to anytime those are there. And the chocolates from Ross and TJ Maxx will make you want to

dig your grandma up and slap her. Oh, my God. Like, it is the best. It is so good. They're like the little, what do they call it? See?

Oh, those little sticks. They're the sticks with the chocolate inside of them. Oh, dude, I'll go crazy on them. You know what I mean? Now those sticks though, those can get a call from candy anytime. Bro, I grew up on those. No, those sticks were good. Did you ever fake smoke them like a stogie?

My mom didn't play with the fake smokes. Oh my God, I used to have a pack of fake cigarettes in my pocket. Little candy sticks. I'd sit there with my grandpa and go... And I'd be smoking together on the deck. Dude, he used to fart. My grandpa would fart and blame it on a frog that was in the backyard. And then when I would go looking for it, he'd lock me outside.

Because I believed him that was that's it can we let's rank farts of family members oh my god i think grandpas are the worst because their ass is sour and rotten and old it's just old it's just old ass like it smells like marlboro's like folgers coffee like that's what a grandpa ass smells like it's like a little bit of jim crow dust in there it's a lot of it a lot of Civil War, if you know what I mean. Civil War. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. It's bad stench. You said Civil War fart. That might be the funniest shit I've heard all day, bro. Think about someone having to fart during the middle of war. They're just like, get up. Like, that is so fucking funny. Oh, my God.

So, I'll rank my family's farts. It's definitely my grandpa, my dad. My dad, his farts are so bad. He used to have a nissan titan with he's having with like the mesh seats he farted in that thing so much you would sit down and it would like illuminate it would go i swear to god it's like you could call preston right now and he would know exactly what i'm talking about solids Farting solids? The f***? What's crumbling up and going in the air?

It's like the gas that's into the mesh seat. You'd fart so much in it. Because my dad used to eat flagrantly healthy. Healthy farts are the worst. The worst. Oh my god, man. And I'm not going to lie. If I ever heard my mom fart, I think I'd disown her.

I think I'd put her in a hole. Your mom's never farted in front of you? Not on purpose. I walked past a toilet one time and i heard it oh and she was still like oh no she's like oh it was like it's like a marching band she's gonna she's going to yell at me for saying that. First in my family, Olivia. Second place, Olivia. Third place, Malachi through Olivia. Dude, her farts have been rancid.

And her mom, okay, first off, Timmy P. Yeah. I want you to think about this. Tim's farts are so bad, he leaves his home when he has to poop. Dude, my dad does the same thing. Or he used to. That's bullshit. He'll drive to a local gas station and poop in it and come back home don't skip past live though you

gotta stay on live oh my god it lives farts are are top tier ass it is it is like sewage it's like a waste plant it's like it is i can't it's indescribable like it is so bad and it's always at night and that's supposed to be your sacred sanctuary. You're in a bed. It's cold. You're cozy. You got a little ruby keeping your crotch warm. And then all of a sudden, you're just hit with a toxic gas.

Like a Knox grenade from what's his name? From Apex. What's his name? No, not Fuse. It's caustic. It's natural gas. it's not it's not like it's not like butt but the worst person ever worst smelling butt ever is our editor cj no cj dude i threatened to fight him the other day he thought bro he thinks it's games like bro we're not we're going to go get food right we stop We stop at Target. We're pulling into the Target, and I hear, like,

just hear something in the passenger. It's like, brr, brr, brr, brr, brr, like that, like little spurts. Brr, brr, brr, brr. And I go, I hear it, but the fact that it was continuous, I go, CJ, you just shit? And he goes, nah, bro, it's my slide. I reverse into this parking spot, and I never directly just get out of my car. I always, like, doom scroll for about 14 seconds.

I have to before I go in. We know that. I'm doom scrolling, and I hear him chuckling. And I'm not registering what he's chuckling because I like to ignore him a lot. Like, I don't want. No, as much as you should. Everything that comes in is not going all the way in. It's just going out.

So I hear him chuckling, but then I'm like, this chuckle's a little too long. And I look like, what are you laughing at? And as soon as I turn, I tasted it. I tasted it. It was like the back of my tongue. Like, he defecated at it. And I literally almost put hands and feet on this young man and sent him back to Arkansas.

I almost fired him. I was like, bro, you can't play like that. Like, that's not funny, dog. And then I left the window rolled down when we left because I was like, bro, you can't play like that. It's not funny, dog. And then I left the window rolled down when we left because I was like, that has to air out. I come back to the car, the window's rolled up. I said, CJ, what happened? He goes, I rolled it up, bro.

You hotboxed my car. Your ass gas was just fuming in the car the entire time you were in the store. No, he's disrespectful as shit. He's the most disrespectful person I know. When we walk around here, he'll just be like, wait, I got something for you. It's time you're in the store. Bro. No, he's disrespectful as shit. Dude, he's the most disrespectful person I know. And when we walk around here, he'll just be like, wait, I got something for you.

Dude, sorry. It's like you're... You're like six years old. Yeah, no. CJ's staying home for tour. Next tour. No, yeah, you're not coming. You're just...

You gotta clean your ass or you're not coming. Or you're getting a different plane, a different hotel. Oh, my God. That just made me think of something. Uh, what? What?

What's in your bag? What? What? Not a... Not a... of something. What? What? What's in your bag? What? Not a... Not a... Not a... What? What's in your bag? What's in my bag?

Huh? I'm going to go get in drag. Huh? Put on makeup and a nice old wagon. Huh? Now I'm going to go and touch that dragon. Huh? Go, Kim.

It's your turn. Huh? Go, Kim. It's your turn. Okay. Huh? Huh? It's my turn. Yep. What. It's your turn. Okay. It's my turn. Yep.

Big bodies in here to big burn. What? Smoking drugs. Why are you always smoking drugs? That's all I listen to. Can we freestyle real quick? Okay, go. Okay.

Uh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. That's your nervous thing. You always go, uh, uh-huh, uh-huh. You can never, if I was like, start a beat, always go, uh, uh, uh, uh. Like that. You don't, you can never, if I was like, start a beat, you'd be like, uh, uh, uh, uh. Like, bro, it just registered.

You always do that. I do? When someone says, hey, how does that beat sound? You're like, it was something like, uh, da, da. You just have, like, there's one beat. You want to play this game? Go. Let's go to our adderies. Let's release the footage. Oh, God. Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

He can't even just say a sentence. He has to go, da, da, da, da, da, da, before. All right, here we go. Okay. Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm. Go first. Let's finish each other. I'll finish.

Oh. Hey, yo. Whoever we used to finish each other. No, stop it. I do a bar. You do a bar. Let's go bar for bar. Here we go. Mm, yo. Whoever we used to finish together. No, stop it. I do a barge. You do a barge. Let's go bar for barge. Here we go.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Okay. Here we go. Find the beat. Yeah. Sitting in the studio drinking some Red Bull. I'm going to go and hit him in the head.

Red Bull is hard. Bull? Yeah. Bull? Yeah. Bull. Yeah. School. Cool. Fool.

Drool. Okay, here we go. Let me start it off. Okay. Uh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Huh.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Okay, Cam's got a big head and he stinks. You got braids and you're washing the sink. Cam's got hips that don't lie. I think he is a big old guy. I'm a big guy, but at least I'm not scrawny.

Cam gives me a hand real hard. I'm gonna picture him. I'm gonna finish to a picture of me. To a picture. Okay, Peyton shows his ass on FaceTime. He gets butt naked

at the drop of a dime. This is harder. Speaking of things coming out of holes, did you know when whales blow out water, they don't blow out water?

That's not water coming out of their hole. I figured that out. Yeah. You knew that? Yes. What is it then? What is it?

You tell me since you know. Step on me and tell me what it is. What is it? Air. Yeah. Yeah, it's air. Y'all knew that? Pretty sure it's carbon dioxide.

Ned's declassified over here. You put in CO2, you put in hail oxygen. That's how it works. Hey, just because you're one year out of high school doesn't mean doesn't mean you drop scientific bars on us okay but i thought they were like put on a show shamu and a blonde but it's basically it's the equivalent to when you blow out like when it's cold outside and it's like that you see your breath that's basically what that is yeah it's also because they're underwater. So when they go up to breathe, their hole's still covered with water.

Let's imagine you had, I don't know, a mouthful of water and you went to breathe out. They open their mouth under there? No, they eat through their belly button. Yeah, they open their mouth. Can whales sleep on land? Dude, your fixation on where these underwater creatures sleep is my i'm gonna buy you a scuba tank no and a whole suit and i'm just

gonna throw you in the atlantic i'd die no you wouldn't i can't swim that's the suit and that's the tank part your tanks for the breathing you get to yeah but i have to go to the bottom no no no i can't flow there's a cord you're on a cord you're not buoyantant? Yes, there's water on the hole and they're breathing. I'll never go to the middle of the ocean. That's my biggest fear is the middle of the ocean. Middle of the ocean. But not just the middle of the ocean. My biggest fear is a storm in the middle of the ocean.

I think that is from the hell resilience. They put that. Who? The hell resilience? It's the biggest gang from hell. You haven't heard of them? The hell resilience. The hell resilience.

No. Yeah. You're teaching me something new. You're lying to my eyes? The Hell Resilience. The Hell Resilience. No. Yeah. You're teaching me something new. You're lying to my eyes. Oh, a little bit of both. Okay. The Hell Resilience. No, it's genuinely my biggest fear because I was watching Outer Banks and they were in

the middle of the sea. First of all, actually, never mind. I was going to go in on Outer Banks. They had a drunk guy jump in the water to save a pregnant lady and he did it. They came up on the same shore as the rest of the group like three hours later are you kidding me we're in the middle of the ocean yeah there was a storm one of them fell off she's pregnant the other dude he's drunk jumps in the middle of the storm in the middle of the ocean everybody's crying we lost him the rest of the group that was on the stayed on the ship like normal people washes up on a random shore, right?

Just the middle of the island somewhere. They're like, oh, they died. We're never going to see them again. And then they come out the water. Are you kidding me? Yeah, bullshit. The middle of the ocean? Bullshit.

Yeah, no. It's not Phelps out there. But a storm in the middle of the ocean is my biggest fear. I don't think there's any other storm or disaster that could be scarier than a storm in the middle of the ocean i think if we it would take the convincing of like the world's greatest negotiator but if we could get you on a cruise no cruises are pointless no they're not i've talked about this cruises are not pointless if we could get you on a cruise you would experience it it

would kind of ease your hives a little bit and then you wouldn't be as afraid but it is scary what is it can you think of any storm or like disaster that would be worse than a storm in the middle of the ocean uh i'd say anything that affects actually us like no i'm saying being in a volcano eruption no way yes you can run from volcano eruption you can run from a volcano eruption yes the lava goes up and it spouts out. You see it rumbling. You can hear it rumbling for a little bit. Hear it rumbling.

Yes. Like you wired it up. First off, they evacuate you days before. When the rumbling starts, they're like, get the hell out of here. This is going to be bad. You ever heard of Pompeii? That's when they bombed the beach.

No. Nope. Nope. Not at all pompeii mountain volcano right and everyone's like this oh that's sad very sad was it a low volcano it was a huge volcano high in the sky hill on a hill so in the skies on a hill it erupted and it burned you get entire city you can run from lava you can't run from a storm in the middle. It was on a hill. It erupted and it burned the entire city. You can run from lava. You can't run from a storm in the middle of the ocean. What?

You're not in the middle of the ocean, though. If you were, you were on a cruise. Yeah. So it's more actually accessible than going next to a volcano. That's more likely. First off, what do you think a cruise is? You think we born Galveston. They go, hey, let's go into the middle of the earth and turn around.

No. Yes. No. How do you get from one part of the world to the other through boat? You got to go to the middle of the ocean. My cruise went from Galveston to Mexico and back. You went to the cheapest cruise ever. Oh, don't do that.

If you go to the nice cruises that go to Jamaica and places like that, like the expensive ones, yeah, you got to go through the middle of the ocean. Are you aware how close Jamaica is to us? Jamaica's not in the middle of the ocean. That's in the Bahamas. Jamaica? Yeah. You need to look at a map. A map would benefit you very much.

What are you saying? You think Jamaica's in the middle of nowhere. No, it's in the Bahamas. Which is close. You got to go through the ocean to get to the Bahamas. Well, no shit. You're not going to ride a fucking razor scooter to it. That's what I'm saying. So the storm happened on the way to the Bahamas.

You're not in the middle of the ocean. You're not in the middle of the ocean. You're not in the middle of the ocean. Were you on the side of it? No, you're on like a coastline. Your whole thing was, oh, you're getting scared. You're getting stormed in the middle of the ocean. So you're saying on a cruise, you're on a coastline.

You can see a just laid out getting sun tanned. Okay, no, I didn't say that. Exactly, you're in the middle of it. Dude, you're not in the middle of it. Okay, what's your definition of middle? Let's start there. The middle. Oh, that's great.

There's a shore, a shore, a shore, and a shore. You're not on the shores. And you're in the middle. You're in the dead middle. Not in the dead middle, but there's no... Oh my God! So we're quarter right middle. No.

We're two thirds middle. There's no accessible land around you. The middle of the ocean. That's not middle of the ocean, though. Where is it? That's just ocean. You are near land. You're maybe a day away, 12 hours away.

If I'm a day away from land, I'm out there. I'm in the middle of the shit. Middle of the ocean is like the ships that take three weeks to bring all the cargo over. That would be middle of the ocean. They are screwed if something happens. You're screwed if you're in a cruise on the way to the Bahamas from Texas, Cam, and there's a storm. Are you not screwed? First off, you probably leave from Florida if you're going to the Bahamas, but you can still leave from Galveston.

But anyway, no, you're not. How? What are you going to do? Because there's hydraulic chambers. There's suspensions. They have things that... Those big waves like Wolf of Wall Street. Like that kind of storm.

You're not screwed? No. It's a cruise ship. It's huge. The bigger they are, the harder they fall. Do you never hear of that? Are you a coach? No.

No. Yes, I've heard that, but you're just scared. You're scared and that's fine. I am scared. But I'm damn sure not scared of a volcano, Cam. How are you not afraid of a volcano? Because you can run from the lava. Burning alive or drowning, which is worse?

I had a friend that drowned. Me too. He's dead. Same. Well, he's not dead. Mine is. No, I said mine is. Oh, wait, what? Yeah. He's not dead. No, he is. I thought you were saying yours isn't. No, mine is. Oh, you're the one that said not dead oh mine is no i said mine is oh wait what yeah he's not dead no he is i thought

you're saying yours isn't no mine is oh you're the one that said not dead we're not about to dap up over this but drowning or burning alive equally terrible i think which one's quicker probably probably drowning would be quicker right probably so i'd say drowning you know drowning it's not actually you can't get the oxygen. It just fills up your lungs. Yeah. Yes. That's so sad.

It is sad. But back to being burned alive from magma. I don't think that would suck. I don't think it's burned alive. It's more melted alive. It's not being burned. Burned alive is a fire. Melting is the liquid.

You're melting off. You're not on fire if you're in lava. They don't go down into a brick of human and they mold them. When people get hit with a volcano and from the ash and everything, some of them literally go and they turn into this stone.

Oh, then I'd pick that. I would love to be stone. I want to be stuffed anyway. Oh, that's what I was going to say about your foot. You know how I like keeping souvenirs? I want to cut your foot off when you die. Okay. Well, you're going to be hanging above my door.

You're going to be long gone before I die. You're going to be, I will amputate my foot and place it on your tombstone on your 15th anniversary whenever I'm about to go. Okay. Yeah. All right. Okay. But say like, whatever, we're both grow up old.

Say tragedy strikes? No, no, no. Say we both grow old. Like I'm lucky enough No, no, no. You want my hooves? No, say we both grow old. Like, I'm lucky enough. Like a miracle happened. Yeah, a miracle. And you go before me.

Okay. I want to cut your foot off, and I want to hang it above my door, and I'll slap it like a high five. No, like, you know whenever you're playing college football, and they run out of the tunnel, and they slap the good luck thing? You're like, today's going to be a good day. Here we go. We'll do them scroll.

All right, let's get it. You just give me a foot five with my dead foot. Yeah. You're a creep, bro. You're an absolute creep. The You Should Know Podcast. All right, buddy. I know I made some jokes.

I know you made some jokes about the age and whatnot. But one thing, you're never going to beat the accusations. And I said that different. Yeah, no, I think I added an I. going to beat the accusations. I said that different. I think I added an I. I think I'm young now. But the thing you're bad at is math. So we're bringing back a good old fan favorite. We're doing another little math quiz for

Professor P over here. You have this thing of giving me math quizzes. It makes you tantalated. My name is Cam. I got AP math when i was a freshman i got my math credits before i graduated college i don't know how it works my name is p i write a good essay and tell a good story that's all i did in school i just wrote essays and i got a slap on the ass from the dean of english and made out in back hallways good man i missed out on that part here

we go so uh going straight into it math quiz and you already know we're coming with some word problems because those are the bro that's not that's not that's not math those are the beauty sam adopted three cats he feeds them a total of three cans of cat food a day and two boxes of cat food a week wait how much do you need a board? Yes. Okay, you got it. It's the biggest board in history. Okay, I got my board. I got my board. Here we go.

All right. So Sam adopted. Go ahead from the top. Board is in hand. Here we go. Sam adopted three cats. He feeds them a total of three cans of cat food a day and two boxes of cat food a week.

How much cat food does he need to buy each week? So three cats, three cans, two what? Three cats, three cans, two boxes. Two boxes. How much cat food does he need to buy each week? How many cans comes in a box? That's not even... That's wrong.

It's not wholesale. He's not buying boxes of cans. What's the box? Box is like the kibble. The cans are probably the moist. What? Wait, so there's two different... Have you ever had an animal?

There's kibble, and then there's moist food. How much moist and kibble does he eat? moist. What? Have you ever had an animal? There's kibble and then there's moist food. How much moist and kibble does he eat? Cans, moist, boxes, kibble. Three cats. Three cans a day, two boxes a week. Three cans a day, two boxes a week. How much food does he need to buy? Three cans a day.

Yes. So he runs out of cans in one day. Because that's all the cats are fed. Okay, there you go. And then one cat's going to be hungry. Because there's three cats, right? There's three cats.

They all get boxes. Three cats, they all get cans. They don't all get boxes. One of these is a little skinny. Because they don't get a box. Unless a box can be evenly distributed to three. So, what's three divided by two? Oh, my God.

That's what we got to figure out. Three divided by two. What? What? Three divided by two. What? Three divided by two. That goes one, two, minus that. 1.1. 1.5, and that's stupid as hell and wrong. It's 1.5, and that's wrong and dumb.

One of the cats is hungry. They're all fed. They're good cats. Not if there's only two boxes. There's not a skinny feline in this equation. There's three. They're all fed. They're good cats. No one's got a... Not if there's only two boxes. There's not a skinny feline in this equation. There's three cats. Right. Each cat, three cans of food a day. Oh!

Each get three cans of food a day. No! They're so obese cats. Each get a can of food a day. And there's two boxes throughout the whole week. How much food does he need to buy? Three times seven. 21 cans.

Okay. 21 cans. Yes. And there's two boxes, and they all eat them. Yes. It doesn't matter who eats them. So one and a half times seven. Anybody got calculations on that?

One and a half times seven. My calculator won't open. One and a half times seven. That's ten and a half times my calculator won't open one and a half times seven that's 10 and a half 10 and a half plus 21 what the f**k are you doing that's 31 and a half pieces of food phew through the week close no 21 oh it's 21 boxes dog Dog, no. 21 cans. How many boxes? Three. No.

How many did we start off with? Fuck. Two? Two times seven. 14. Shut up. Just shut up and listen. Hey, you did good in English. A big part of English is listening and reading.

Sam adopted three cats. I don't think that's important. He feeds them. How he bought them. I don't think that's important. He feeds them. How he bought them. I don't think that's necessary. He should adopt more. He has three cats. Yes.

Okay. They each, he feeds them a total of three cans of cat food a day. Yeah, so all the cans are gone. Yes. And two boxes of cat food a week. Yes. How much cat food does he need to buy? So I'm looking for a number of cans.

So we're not looking for the cans. Number of cans. 21 cans. How many boxes? And he has two boxes. Two boxes go a week. And they both eat two? They both eat two boxes?

I'm still confused on where the boxes are. These cats are f***ing... I'm about to piss myself. I'm genuinely not getting it. I'm not even making a joke. I'm about to piss myself. I'm genuinely not getting it. I'm not even making jokes. I'm about to piss myself. Well, hell... He f***ing has three cans a day

and two boxes cover all his cats for the whole week. I stopped listening. Hold on. Say it in less words and maybe it will make me easier. Three cans per day, two box per week. How many cans and box for a week of food? Seven divided by two. I'm dead ass, no?

No! Lift me up. Two boxes of cat food a week feeds the cats. So how many boxes a week does he eat? So I got seven days, right? I got seven days. I? I got seven days. I'm trying to fit two boxes of food in there. I got to figure out how much food's in those two boxes.

Stupid mother... You stupid idiot. Bro. Okay, just tell me. I'm not going to get this. You have the cans right. Yeah, no, I got this. I'm going to say it one more time.

That's a swing one. No, you need to look me in my eyes. I'm going to say it one more time. Right. And you're going to get it. You're going to get one more time. That's a 21. No, you need to look me in my eyes. I'm going to say it one more time. Right. And you're going to get it. You're going to get one more answer. And if you don't get it right, we're moving on. Okay.

Two boxes of cat food a week. A week. How many boxes does he need? Two. Yeah. God damn. Well, if you would have said it like that at first. Holy shit, I i did but you said

you said seven divided by three i need my calculator and opening if you take the one and a half is you but can you buy a half box is that available on the shelf okay that was a trick question no it wasn't okay next one okay dude this is dumb oh my, my God. No, no. This isn't dumb. This is not dumb. Caterpillars have six eyes in four to eight feet. No, they don't. First of all, no, they don't. I had a pet caterpillar. You did?

Yes, I picked it up. It died in two hours. Okay. Caterpillars have six eyes. Why are you drawing? I'm a visual learner. In four to eight feet. No legs?

Where'd the legs go? Four to eight feet. How many fewer eyes than legs would a... Okay, this one's going to f*** your world. Caterpillars have six eyes in four to eight feet. For the love of God, just write six eyes and four to eight feet. For the love of God, just write six eyes and four to eight feet.

Don't draw. That looks like a turd. It looks like a turd with a little twig coming out of it. Six eyes. What the fuck is that? What?

Six eyes. It looks like you spell. Look at that. I farted. Six eyes. No, seriously. What is that? That is S-I-S-S.

Sis. Six sis. I know what it says. Eyes. Okay, six eyes. Two feet. And four to eight feet. Okay, hold on.

To eight feet. Four to eight feet. Okay, here we go. Yes. How many fewer eyes... Less than eyes. ...than legs would four eight-legged caterpillars have? Oh, it's a formulaic.

Formulaic? It's a formula. Okay. Yes. So how many fewer eyes... Say the... Caterpillars have six eyes. No, no, no.

The equation. That's what I was doingillars have six eyes. No, no, no. The equation. That's what I was doing. And you stopped me. Oh, sorry. How many fewer eyes... Slow down. How many fewer eyes than legs would four eight-legged caterpillars have? He has X minus 6 equals... Okay, here we go. x minus 6 equals 4 times 8. Sure.

Right. 8, 32. Okay. 32 x minus 6. Okay, that is a nasty 6. Plus 6 cancels out. Plus 6 over here. That's 38. x equals 38 legs. 38 less legs. Wait, you got a minus 6. Oh, wait. Wait, why does it say 38 equals 38?

x was supposed to be there somewhere. Oh, x is right here x equals 38 so x minus 32 somebody calculate that for me 31 31 30 29 28 26 legs oh bro you're oh my god well i'm not gonna i'm just not gonna get this one no so tell me all you're trying to do change that minus to a plus two at times oh okay okay but i got the four times eight right that's pretty smart so first off you don't even need first you don't even need that just do there's four caterpillars so So they all have six eyes. So what is six times four? What is six times four? 30.

What is six times four? Six, 12, 18, 24. Okay, so 24. Write that down. There's 24 eyes. So now. I thought there was six. There's 24, there's six, but there's four caterpillars.

There's four caterpillars. I thought there was four to eight. There's four to eight legs. Why was that important? It's not. That's the trick. Well, stop telling eight legs. Why was that important? It's not. That's the trick. Well, stop telling me it. I'm reading the question as it is.

Six eyes per caterpillar. There's four eight-legged caterpillars. So now you have 24 eyes. So now find out how many legs they have. Four times eight is? 32. There you go. 32 minus? 24.

Is? Negative something, right? You said 24 minus 32. There you go. 32 minus 24 is negative something, right? You said 24 minus 32. It's negative. I said 34 minus I thought it was 32 minus 24. Dude. 8 times 4. 32 minus 24. Yeah. What's the answer? You do not need to calculate. Put your phone down. Put your phone down.

Put your phone down. You don't need a calculator. 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 38. Oh, I had it right here. I had it the whole time. That's the great thing about math. The answer's right under your nose every time. Oh my god. Okay, we're gonna do a couple more. No, just do one more because I'm about to pass out. This is unbelievable.

You want to do something about more caterpillars? I don't think my penis is ever smaller than what I do, Matt. If you catch three four-legged caterpillars and six- Stop doing caterpillars. Those are too long. Those are too long a beast. Give me like an orangutan or something. Okay.

Here we go. Okay, give me something that's not tricked, though. Like, genuinely just like- Okay, here we go. If Bob had wood, how much wood would he have? If God had wood, how much wood would he have? Bob. Okay, this is wood would he have? Bob. Bob.

Okay. This is kind of like it. Yes. Joe and his friends, Luke and Sal. Shit names. By the way, you need more ethnic friends. Joe. Okay.

Damien and his friends, Jonathan and Demarcus. No, I like the other names better. It's too long. Joe and his friends, Luke and Sal, bought a large chocolate cake. Joe. They're broke. Split a chocolate cake. Joe. They're broke. They split a chocolate cake. Times are tough.

It's all right. So three people to one equals one chocolate cake. Okay, there's your formulaic. Joe cut it into six equal pieces and shared it with others. Joe had more than the other two boys. Sal had more than Luke. Who had the most cake? The friends.

Quick guess. Who had the... This isn't even math, brother. This is harder. This is the hardest one, no? Holy shit. I don't even have, brother. This is harder. This is the hardest one, no? Holy shit. I don't even have to read anything. Listen.

Joe had more than the other two boys. But Sal had more than Luke. Wait, who started it? Joe, Sal, and Luke bought a cake. Wait, hold on. Joe. Joe. Sal.

I really like the name Sal. Okay, Luke. I had a guy named Luke. He was from Kentucky. Beat him up one time. No, you didn Sal. I really like the name Sal. Okay, Luke. I had a guy named Luke. He was from Kentucky. Beat him up one time. No, you didn't. I did. His name's Luke.

Mute the last name. He had a big Adam's apple. I swear to God, I hit him in it. Couldn't breathe. We were playing basketball. I get ferocious. He's talking shit. Bro, just figure out the cake.

Yeah. Joe cut it into six pieces Yep Okay He didn't even write anything He said yep He cut it into six pieces Right

Equal pieces And shared it with the others I missed the beginning though Joe They bought a f***ing cake Yeah but you said Joe had more than Luke That's not the beginning

Oh Joe had more than the other two boys So Joe's on top Sal Number one But Sal had more than Luke So so sal's number two and luke you're last you deserve it big adam's apple who had the most cake joe ding ding ding that's it oh you see how you sweat and you cause your own storms and panics the thing said joe has more than

the other two boys and you said you said i didn't know where they got the cake from. You need help, dog. You need help. Okay, let me give you one. And then we'll move on. We'll move on. Okay, here we go. All right.

Did you do this on pre-K? Yeah, pre-K, dog. How do you go to the next one? You pick an answer and hit submit. Lucy's mom runs a daycare through Friday. Oh, wait. What? Brother can't even read.

There's so many goddamn ads on here. Lucy's mom runs a daycare Monday through Friday. She cares for five kids. Five children. The parents pay $. She cares for five kids. Five children. The parents pay $200 a week for each child. How much money does she make each week? $1,000.

Next question. $1,000. Next question. How did you get that? How did I get that? How did I get that? Go. Go to the next question. It is a fact that each person throws out about three pounds of garbage a day. How many pounds of garbage do ten people throw out in one day?

Thirty. Thirty pounds of garbage. Did you ever go on like sleepovers? You're a loser. How am I a loser? You just asked me a word problem that is as simple as three times ten. What was it?

Okay, I'm going to reword it and see if I can even just make you mess up. No, just say exactly how it is. Okay. I know the answer. I don't know how to get to it. The average person throws out three pounds of garbage per day. There's ten people. How many pounds of garbage are thrown out per day?

There's ten people with three pounds of garbage for seven days in a week. Right there. Right there. That's exactly where my brain would go. No one asked about a week. I said about a day. Even if it was a week. How much is a seven how many pounds of garbage 10 no 70 three no three pounds 21 2100 pounds a week what are they a landfill what are they uh no

three pounds per person 10 people that's 30 pounds a week. 70 pounds a week. Yes. Oh, shit. No, he's not. No, you're not. Okay, let's move on to something else. Jesus. Yeah, it's never going to get old, but my God.

It was. 2,100 pounds. It's 210, you numbskull. Oh, we're close. We just added a zero. 2,100, there's 100 people. I do have a question for you. Multiply by 10. The You Should Know Podcast.

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at a massive 35% discount and with six additional freebies from HighSomni.com. The world's first manifesting mask. Now available to everyone at HighSomni.com. Since you do like to make fun of me embarrass me on the internet okay genuine question yes if i tomorrow woke up as a cricket what would you take care of me like like if you came into my room, right, and instead of me being in my bed, there's a big old cricket. Oh, you're a 6'7 cricket?

I'd chop your head clean off. I'd go, oh, my. And you're just like, no, it was just me. Like it had my clothes on, but like a little cricket with my clothes on, so you knew it was me. So it was a little cricket. With a do-rag. A little cricket with a do-rag, some dingy shorts that probably belong to me,

and some Travis Scotts. That's what I'm seeing. It's that big. Yeah. Would you take care of me? Yes. What would you do? I'd keep you in my pocket. I don't want to be in there.

Can you still talk? No, I'm just a cricket. Oh. Like I'm a regular cricket. It's just you know that's Peyton. Would you take care of me? How would I know it's you if you're a regular cricket? Someone told you.

Someone told me, hey, that's your friend. No, there's a note. I left a note. I slapped that person. I crushed the cricket. That's what I would do. I'd let it go. Don't you dare.

And then you found out it was me because I never returned. There's no way I'd believe that unless there's like a genie or something. Say like in the middle of the night a witch came into my room and was like, in the morning you'll be a cricket. And then so I was like, can I leave Cam a note because he's going to be here in the morning. I write a note right before I turn into a cricket. It says, hey, I'm this cricket. It's Peyton.

And then you come to my room in the morning and I'm a cricket. And there's a note there. Would you take care of me? My immediate thought would be that you are somehow in the corner of your room recording me. And you're like, I'm about to you're like I'm about to get him. I'm about to get this. Look, he's really stupid enough

to think that cricket's me. That's what I would immediately think. But if I search the area, CJ was like his car's still here. He's nowhere to be found. There's cameras outside.

Like no one left. I think that's him. Yeah, I'd 100% take care of you. Really? Would you feed me? Yeah. What if Ruby tried to eat me? Mag you. Really? Would you feed me? Yeah. What if Ruby tried to eat me?

Maggots? What if I feed you? What if I grubs? What if I, I don't know what to feed. What if crickets eat? Poop? Would you like, oh my God. I bring you over, you hang out with Ruby.

She torments you because you're a cricket. She's going, psst, psst. You're like, oh, Harold, oh. And then she poops and I throw you on the poop but your new found love for poop you eat ruby's poop yeah so you would take care of me 100 i'd keep you in a little glass jar thank you you're welcome i had that thought that was a strange ass question oh i was really high okay speaking of strange shit i don't know what made me think of this but it's on the drive up here today uh my mom when i was about nine, she got T-boned in her car.

Ford Explorer. Totaled it. T-boned. Her Nokia flew 70 yards. Her cell phone flew 70 yards and obliterated. She kept that Nokia as a souvenir. My mom kept a souvenir from getting T-boned on an interstate. Isn't your mom a hoarder, though?

Not a hoarder. She likes her things. if you see a real hoarder lisa's not that well not like disgustingly hoarder but like she it's a hard time letting go of things because she has your teeth 100 yeah she has my teeth in a bag so it's not too surprised she kept a mutilated phone she kept a mutilated phone to remember the day she was t-boned in a car i get that first time one of the first times live came over she showed her she said honey look at this she said yeah i was in a bad accident one day and live was like what the is going on i was like mom that's your phone from when you got wrecked first of all your mom is the sweetest lady ever so that is sweet that she showed you her her car wreck phone but i do get that i hold on to everything i can't that's why I have so much things in my room. Yeah, but yours is garbage.

It's mostly trash. Like, there's zero significance. But no, the meal was good. And I need to remember. It's more of like a memory thing. Because I forget things like that. Like, I forgot when Thanksgiving was until I woke up and I smelled some shit. And I was like, that's Thanksgiving.

I forgot why I was back home. But, like, CJ knows I'll forget anything he lives with me to remind me that's his job I literally tell you hey remember that thing we talked about and you go bro why are you obsessed with lying and I go we literally talked about Thursday

and you're like bro no we didn't talk about it you'll forget everything so if there's like a really good meal I'll have I'll leave it on my nightstand but I'll be like I'm going to throw that away. But just in case when I want to go eat that again, I'll know where I got it from. And I'll smell the package to see that's what the meal I got was.

Because I'll forget. You operate like you're a beast. Like a genuine, like a monster. Do you think so? Like you don't know real rules in society and like English and stuff. And you're like, familiar. And like that's how you're going to know to order. Like, I've had this once familiar and like that's how you're gonna like that's how you're gonna know to order like i've had this once before and that's how you work i remember there's a time i used to be really clean like do you remember in college you weren't that

clean i wasn't bro you had like late like there was so much crumbs from ladies chips it was like embedded into your mattress you'd lay down it's like like a re-crumble of the crumb that's different no that's just me eating on myself no sign and you fit everyone knows you lined a gallon water jug with bathtub water dude that's the dirtiest shit i've ever seen you get on me how i drink my gallon water yeah what's wrong with the way i drink the noises you make when you drink are disgusting drink right on that mic like this is exactly drink exactly... Drink normal. No bullshit. And Cam knows.

This is how I drink my gallon of water. And look at the lips. He literally is like this. Oh! Oh! Drink again. Drink again.

Let him pick it up one more time. I'll give you a side profile. You're welcome on that one website he's drinking like a boxer like a dog bro like a dog you're like a hound you're like like you're drowning yourself it's regular water dude i swear to god we were he came to my house the other day and he literally took a drink from that same thing and he was like he was on his phone zoom scrolling he's like what the

do you want i said you're in my house he said bro you just keep scrolling and he goes i'm thirsty oh my god that did look crazy but he's slamming this water. And I was like, you sound like Lucky. Like Liv's parents' dog. And he spit that shit everywhere, bro. You just don't do most things regularly. There's nothing wrong with how I drink my water. First off, your lips. Sorry, I have actual lips.

You're not sucking off pure life. You're just taking a sip of water. Put your bottom lip at the bottom, top lip halfway, so you don't just get waterboarded. He literally goes, I'm going to get a drink. Yeah, this is bad. I need a drink of my own. Look at that.

Don't look at them. Don't make eye contact. And when you drink like that, backwash is inevitable. I don't have backwash. I didn't eat. What? I didn't eat. What the hell do you mean you didn't eat that's not back backwash is if yourself your own spit goes in your mouth backwash is if you have food back you're backwashing the food payton backwash is something that's not that liquid going into that liquid container no it's not holy shit backwash is if you're like so're, like, so say you're at dinner, right?

And somebody says, can I get a sip of that? And then they say, yeah, but no backwash. That's the food. You don't want food. You ever drank something and then there's little floaties

at the bottom? That's backwash. It's the floaties. Are you? Are you? I'm dead ass. Every time I've talked about backwash, it's been floaties.

It's food. Backwash is your spit. No. Your bodily fluid. You mean to tell, why the, I'm going to tell someone, hey, I don't need your Cool Range Doritos in my drink, dog, but have at it. Yeah, it's backwash. Don't want your backwash.

Backwash is the backwashing. Who are you hanging out with? Yeah, Pres is like. Bro, it's. No no backwash is spit bodily fluid anything that's not the drink going back in the drink i i beg to differ that's dude that's not that's you can't actually that's not backwash actually isn't subjective you can't put something back in there this isn't up for this isn't up for debate if you're drinking a liquid and it falls back in that's still the same liquid. Holy shit.

Backwash is a foreign object. You have now progressed to S tier of nastiness. You think the way you drink a drink, you literally go like this. Your mouth's up. It looks wild. And then you go, huh. All that shit going back. Yeah, this is bad.

All that shit going back into the drink. The drink is going back into the drink. That happens every time you- Mixed with your spit. My mouth is dry. All that shit going back into the drink. The drink is going back into the drink. That happens every time you... Mixed with your spit. My mouth is dry. That's why I'm taking a drink. Your mouth is not dry. You're a fucking liar.

Your mouth is wet and nasty and a big ass tongue. That is backwash. You mean something you're... Backwash is food. Anybody in the comments is going to agree. Backwash is food. You can't backwash... It's backwash food.

They don't know anything. They were born in 2012. Is backwash food or spit? Spit. Spit. Spit. Pierce, say it 2012. Is backwash food or spit? Spit. Spit. Pierce, say it. Don't be afraid of Big Boss, man. Say it.

Is Pierce, is food backwash, is backwash food or spit? It's more spit. It's spit. Bro, that's a caucasity thing. That's not a caucasity thing. No, yes it is. You can't. Bro, look, look.

Hold that up to the camera and see how much stuff is in there. Look, there's nothing in there. There's no backwash. If I saw like a piece of a Jolly Rancher at the bottom of your water. That's backwash. That's bullshit. That's what that is. Cam.

You have big enough chunks of food and then you let them back in a drink. That is sin. That is not of the law. That is not of the law. No one agreed on that. Listen, you can't't if this goes like this right if the drink pours out it's because you're drinking it wrong listen if the drink pours out and i put it back in that's not backwash that and that because that's the same liquid it

has to be a foreign object which is spit cam's gonna be spinning there regardless that's nasty i don't have spit my drinks i don't have spitty drinks. Cam, if you put... You're a spitty drink ass broad. Backwash is food. Give me the... Give me it. Give me it. Look at this representation.

You. Your lips. Yes. You drink like this. Yes. That's how you drink. I grab the nozzle with my lips. So when you dump back...

It's actually less. Holy shit! Because I'm like... Now it's less with your mouth wide open. Because it's wide open. It's just falling in like a pit. You're like this. And so it just goes,

it's a bunch of shit. It's a small passageway. So it's like a less of a filtration system. Mine's just big. I'm just dropping it in my mouth. Yours is an open bottomless pit. Yes. You have a little whore of a mouth

and yours is just falling in there with nothing. And then when you stop drinking, you go like this. No, I don't. I close my mouth. Look, I'll show you again. I'll show you again. Look.

Exactly. Nothing fell in. You see how you went and closed your mouth? That's what I do every time. You're supposed to drink every time. You're supposed to literally have to. Give me the thing. I'm listening.

But listen, backwash can't be the original. Oh, my God. Backwash can't be the original liquid. That's just the original liquid going back to the thing? Backwash is not the original liquid. It's your spit. It is your spit. You can't test spit.

Oh, my God. Look, where's the spit? That's not backwash. You can see backwash. Backwash is visual. Dude, no one has ever. No. I want you to think about this.

No one has ever worried about seeing their friend's turkey melt at the bottom. That's all I've ever worried about. Dude, you're close to cannibalism. You are close to just going off the grid and eating someone's left thigh. You're getting awfully close. Like, it, the, Because at Luby's, when they would make my drink so where luby's it's like getting your tires rotated you never went to luby's luby's luby's is sick that's a white people

thing i'm surprised no it's actually kind of not what the hell's luby's is like a buffet yeah they they sound like they sell jelly listen it's literally like a cafeteria it's like the big yellow thing i think they canceled luby's so they cut them off like red lobster like it's done red lobster still around cheddar bay biscuits oh i never had it but so you go into luby's right and you get a tray and then you and there's like this it's like literally a cafeteria yeah no and then i would always get the fish you can get fried fish i getra. Watch your mouth. Fried fish, okra. Super sweet tea. And jello.

And a Diet Coke. That sounds... You would love... It's endless. And it's a bunch of old white people. Yes. It's a buffet? Well, I don't know.

I didn't pay for it ever. It's not endless, but it's nothing but old white people you'd feel comfortable and safe. Okay. My dad... It's like a grandma's kitchen. It's literally like that. And my dad would take me to Luby's after, I don't know what was wrong with my family.

Like there wasn't technology in my house until I was like 14. My dad used to make me impress and drive to downtown Austin with him to cash a check. Like, it's like for the, like he had to go to the bank. Like, oh, he just went to the bank.

Bro, that's what everyone did before the abscess. Yeah. I remember we spent like 40 minutes every time to just do anything. It kind of sucked that he had to go all the way downtown. Maybe he could have went to a local bank. No, but his bank was like a family mom and pop shop. It was in somebody's house.

Am I snitching? Oh, yeah. You might be dry snitching. And then they would give me lollipops, but the edges weren't smooth. They were cut, so I'd always bleed on the lollipops. And then my dad would take me to Denny's or Luby's. When I went to Luby's, I got the fried fish, the Jell-O, and the okra. When you went to Denny's, you got the Grand Slam.

No, Denny's, I would just order bacon and butter. Oh, yeah, bacon and butter. Yeah. Like, what more evidence do I need? My parents are supposed to be here. You got okra and Jell-O. Think about that. Okra and Jell-O at one spot and bacon and butter at the other.

You sound like you live by a campfire. Like, literally. My family had less than you. That's fine. Okay, don't do that. Don't do that. That's fine. Don't do that.

Sorry, we couldn't have... Your family household is beautiful and larger and nice. Because we bought it when there was nobody there. We were the first house over there. Same with my parents. Yeah. Exactly. It's nice.

It's not as big. Your house is double sized. It's fine. That's fine. You had cooler shoes than me growing up better clothes i paid for them i paid for them i paid for my shoes growing up at what age uh like 12 13 yeah what about eight nine i didn't have shoes exactly you're on the trails out there doing whatever you do going to hunt a fox for the family dinner i okay this is a confession this has had nothing to do with you for once but this is a confession and i want to see how kind of close you think you are to that or if you're polar opposite what i've yeah a lot of word bombing i think i'm hitting like peak adulthood

yeah it it it you're becoming annoying to be around. It presented, wow. It presented itself the other night. We had to buy new sheets for the bed and I got excited. That's old shit. Now that is. That's some grown people shit. It really, it really hit me.

Yeah. And we're about to bring a kid into the world. Yeah. Yikes. hit me and we're about to bring a kid into the world yeah yikes and i just sat there and i was like man i don't wanna be like this and i said oh this is gonna be different so how my question to you is because i had that that realization how far if that if peak adulthood is getting happy over vacuum cleaners and my my blinds are to get installed, that makes me hard a little bit. So if you get slight erect off of sheets and blinds and stuff like that, how close or how far are you from peak adulthood?

Oh, I'm never going to get it. I genuinely don't think I'm ever going to be like that. I still have the same, like, I still feel like I'm like 19. I still feel very young, too. No, you shouldn't. But I do. You should. i caught cam this out dad mode is hitting cam oh he literally was looking at his phone like no i did not no i

did not the one finger's that bullshit wi-fi wasn't working at the school that i is not that's not no no and you dress like shit no okay that's just mean i don't dress like shit yeah and you're like more serious now that kind of i kind of have to get ready for that but i'm mean i don't dress like shit yeah and you're like more serious now well that kind of i kind of have to get ready for that but i'm still you don't you can be around right i'm fun yeah i'm fun and like cam doesn't know what's going on in the world like he did he can that i will agree he can tell you what kind of milk babies get and like stuff like that and he's like and he can tell you like the safety precautions and child proofing and all that bullshit but you ask him about like oh oh, dude, you see this?

He's like, man, that's that one rapper boy. That one rapper boy. No, you're always going to be more in-depth with what's going on. But I get excited. I posted something in my house, right? I forgot it was on Instagram story. And somebody was like like bros 25 with a with a with a bear brick i'm like is that like not cool to have at 25 it's like i just got money

and those are expensive like i'm gonna get that exactly like i still want like cause and like supreme like skateboards on my like that's cool to me and i don't think it i don't think i'll be 50 i think and i'll still want that i think think I'm still going to have, like, I still, I am right there with you. I feel young due to the lifestyle and stuff like that, and I feel young, and the way I dress apparently sucks, but I will take that and try to keep that mindset as long as possible, but the realizations are in front of my eyes. Yeah, Cam, you were looking for turtlenecks the other day, brother,

and I was like, goodness, and, like, quarter zips. I was. And I said, golly, brother. I know. And that's probably going to be the hardest thing for me is having to start like dressing like I'm about to go over your like employee benefits. But you don't have to, though. You don't genuinely have to do that.

But the thing is, if my wife gets all done up and beautiful and she's in this amazing dress and heels and then I pop out in a Gymshark shirt. What's different? With some fours on. That's different. But I'm talking about a regular day shirt what's different some fours on that's different but I'm talking about regular day like you don't have to dress like you don't have to work this is a regular day and you said I look like a seventh grader on a field trip now you look you look like I dress like that in high school but you don't have to wear like khakis and like a button up

every day I'll never buy khakis and a button up I'll never I hate khakis I khakis are so unflattering I hate I don't understand the hate with khakis. I'm a khaki, I'm a khaki addict. Khakis are nasty as hell. Oh my God, you put me in a good khaki back in high school, I was killing the game. See, I wore chinos and I rolled the bottoms of them and then I wore them with Sperry's. Couldn't afford chinos, I remember those. Chinos are nice. Yeah, my mom didn't let me go into Abercrombie and Fitz or Hollister.

I didn't, oh, I got mine from, I got mine from Target. Oh, yeah. They were a good fellow. I was never that bad. Yeah, no, oh my God, yeah, your live show fits are going to be bad. Yeah, no. Oh, my God. Yeah, your live show fits are going to be bad for our next tour. Why? Because you're going to be a dad. So?

And you're going to be tired and like. I might have some basics and simples. Hey, modest is hottest, right? Not really. Yeah, Cam. Okay, the day I buy Skechers, I want you to punch me in my sternum. I'm not going to lie, bro. You're losing it.

No, I'm not. You are you're losing it no i'm not you are losing it no i'm not you tell me to turn the music down in the car it's hurting your ears okay like it was loud as shit we're trying to talk and i put my hand out the window just like enjoying the wind you guys stop so i said be careful i said come on bro i said okay that that is that is not you're on par that is i am far old and you're far young in that thing. You're 25. Your f***ing hooves is up here when you drive. And then you finger the wind when you're driving down the street.

It's like there's more outside of the car of you than there is in. That's not sick. Some young, wild, and free, bro. Yeah, okay. All right, whiz. Like, relax. Remember that song? Young and wild and free.

That song is the first time I wanted to smoke marijuana, but I was scared. Just never did it. I was very scared. Yeah. We'll talk about that on Patreon. First time getting cooked. Good morning to you. Oh, man. That's a fun story.

Man. And the spaceship? No. Oh, man. No, that's bad. Did you ever go to Garrett's spaceship? We gotta go to Patreon. We gotta go to Patreon. Oh, man.. No, that's bad. Did you ever go to Garrett Spaceship? We gotta go to Patreon. We gotta go to Patreon.

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of the You Should Know podcast. We absolutely love you. And remember, the merch has one day left if you want the black friday special edition 3m drop of the you should know merch you got one day left to get it and hopefully all orders will be out and at your doors before christmas uh saying hopefully though so you can't put it in pin but we love you confuse the casuals get your good karma this week's secret code oh man this week's secret code uh dwn sounds like a small abbreviation for down but it's really not w in yep don't want nothing nope drink water normal i do bastard no you don't drink water no he drinks

like a boxer with a loose tooth right there like it's it's a bad it's a bad thing drink water normal confuse everybody they're not gonna know what you're talking about and they gotta come join the fam to understand it and that's how we build the community because y'all all love it so now send it to you your biggest hater your best friend your aunt and your old grandpa but he's got nothing else to do but watch it we're going to patreon baby going to patreon we will see y'all all love it. So now send it to your biggest hater, your best friend, your aunt, and your old grandpa, but he's got nothing else to do but watch it. We're going to Patreon, baby. Going to Patreon. We will see y'all there.

We got extended episodes, some Dr. P vlogs, everything, 10-minute talks. It's all over there. Everything you know, link in the bio, Twitch, Discord. Facebook will be back up soon. And most importantly, the merch. You got one day left to get it. We love you so much. And remember, one out of ten koala bears don't make it home

to Christmas and we will see you next time. No, he's boring. Yeah, no, I'm 26. I'm 26. 26 acts like 76.