Your Favorite Thing with Wells & Brandi - Can dogs wear tampons? And other fun things!

Episode Date: March 11, 2020

This week on YFT, Brandi is facing a new challenge in dog-motherhood and Wells is sharing controversial opinions on daylight savings and TikTok trends. Brandi is finally back home in Nashville after weeks of getting some DD in South Africa (as evidenced by her Instagram pic from March 1st) and has officially synced cycles with her dog-daughter. The hosts share a new favorite Amazon review set to a Sarah McLachlan soundtrack, their thoughts on Barb’s dramatic appearance on The Bachelor finale (which is hopefully a preview of what’s to come for The Bachelor’s old-people spinoff), and why the Coronavirus is getting in the way of Instagram ads and potential Bachelor in Paradise drama. Last but not least, Wells responds to a YFT review complaining about ads, which is silly, because this podcast is really just a giant ad for our favorite things, kay? Thanks to our awesome sponsors for making this episode possible! Check out these deals just for you, YFTers. HONEY– Get Honey for free at JoinHoney.com/YFT ROTHY’S– Check out all the amazing shoes and bags available right now at Rothys.com/YFT THIRDLOVE– Go to ThirdLove.com/YFT to find your perfect fitting bra and get 15% off your first purchase

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Hello. What's up? Oh, you know, just getting ready to podcast. Not getting ready to party? Not getting ready to party. Because... Getting ready to fly? I am getting ready to fly. I'm on a fly.

I'm on the red eye tonight. That's what I thought. I know. Last one? Last time, right? Last one. Last time. Dang. At least for this season. But I've been really buttering up Michael Strahan and Kiki and Sarah to see if they'll invite me back for the next iteration of this whole thing. So you want to continue doing it?

Hell yeah, man. You're not exhausted? I mean, I am exhausted going to New York every week, but they're paying me to go talk about The Bachelor on Good Morning America. Like... Yeah. You're right. In what world did that happen? I don't know. You're right. You gotta do it. You gotta do it?

Yeah. So here we are. Brandi, you know what one of my favorite things in the world is? What's that? Online shopping. Duh, same. Because I don't have to go out into the society and see people, you know? And deal with people, yeah. Yeah.

But I really do love shopping online. And if I'm shopping online, I want to save some money. That's why I love me some honey. Need to buy some online singing classes. Yeah, you do. Seriously, I also love honey. It is just the easiest thing in the whole world. You install honey into your browser and then like automatically when you're shopping,

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Save some money, bro. Save some money, bro. Are you in like Zimbabwe or Mozambique or what's happening? No, I'm back in Nashville. Oh, you're back in the Nash. Yeah, I got back. God, I don't even know what day it is. I got back yesterday morning. I landed in Newark at like 4.30 in the morning and then got back to Nashville and had like the longest day yesterday, but managed to stay awake until nine. But you know what did me a freaking solid? It's never been one of my favorite things until today.

Thank you, Daylight Savings Time, for losing an hour because it really helped me get on track today with my jet lag. Okay. So one of my favorite things is the spring forward daylight savings. One of my- You like to lose an hour? Yes, because it stays later longer.

Stays lighter longer. Stays lighter longer later. Stays lighter longer later. I hate the fallback one. That one can suck a d brew yeah oh god well yeah i've never been a fan of it until today because i woke up at 6 30 i mean i was up and up and down throughout the night but not nothing crazy like normal jet lag and then i woke up at 6 30 and i was like okay this isn't an okay time to wake up and start the

day but it was because it was really 5 30 right yeah someone was telling me that california voted on to abolish daylight savings i wish the whole country would so i guess last year we voted on if we can vote on it and that passed so now we're're good. I guess now we're going to vote. And so like, this might be the last one that we ever have in California, which I am all about, you know? Yeah. Oh,

Tennessee needs to get with it. I just don't understand. Like, was it for farmers or some shit? Like, I think so. But like farmers are getting up fucking at the ass crack of dawn. Anyways,

what does it matter? No one's farming in Tennessee anymore. Let's be honest. Yeah. I just don't't understand it's just not like that kind of farming someone was telling me conspiracy theory my barber which i get a lot of i to be honest with you angel needs to get a lot of love on this podcast because i go sit in that chair which by the way fantastic barber i don't even know if he's taking more clients but but if he is, message me and I'll give you his contact information. Anyways, he was telling me the conspiracy is it was a ploy by the electric company to get people to turn their lights on earlier so they could charge them more money. Very interesting.

The electric company. But, like, the electric company can just decide that everyone's going to acknowledge it as a national holiday. Like, I don't understand that. I don't know. Fucking big business, dude. You know? I guess. I mean, I believe it.

You know, the gas companies are convincing the government not to believe in global warming. Yeah. I love a good conspiracy, you know, so I'm here for it. Yeah. Why not? You know? Love a conspiracy. Do you want to know what I came home to?

What'd you come home to? You're going to love this. You're going to love it. Yep, okay, here we go. Astra has her first period. Wow, she's becoming a woman. She is bleeding all over everything, and it's not great. Can I be Bob Barker right now and asking why you're not spay and neutering your pets?

Because my vet recommended to let her have, they call it a heat, to let her have her first heat before we fix her because it allows them to like fully develop before you go in and take all their reproductive organs. Fair enough. So now this is her first one. I guess after it's over, she can then go and get spayed. Is that the female person? Yeah, spay. Yeah, yeah. She went to dog training and I picked her up and they were like, just so you know, any minute now, the floodgates are going to open.

Oh my God. And she's going to be bleeding all over everything. I was like, lovely. Googling dog diapers for a 50 pound dog for the past hour. The Red Sea is about to part. Shark Week Week this week with Brandi Cyrus. That's what's happening. And honestly, it's my own Shark Week

in a couple days, too, so we're just, this household's gonna be... Oh, man. Just hissing at people. I love how the fact that you and your dog have synced up menstrual cycles. Wow.

I know. I know. This is my first time dealing with a dog that has a period. Most of the time when you rescue them, no matter what their age is, for better or worse, they demand that you fix them before you take them from the pound and stuff, which I get, like, is important because the whole problem is that there's too many dogs. But so I've never had to really deal with it.

It was very interesting. Please post a video of her wearing a dog tampon or a dog pad. I don't even know what you call it. They should make dog tampons. That's smart. What? No, they got to shove it up a dog. Trust me, it wouldn't be hard.

It's like wide open. It's like welcoming a tampon. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. The pearly gates are open it's like wide open it's like welcoming a tampon oh really oh yeah the pearly gates are open they're wide open i don't think it'd be that hard to get one in there gross oh my god does that happen i guess so and then when it's not shark week, then the gates close? It closes on up. Yeah, it looks much different. Oh, I didn't know this. I've only had boy dogs.

I know. I know. And so Astra has the kind of tail where it's usually down and covers her butthole and her peepee hole. But like when she's, you know, like outside, like chasing stuff, whenever it flips up and is the curly tail, so it changes. So when her tail flips up and it's curly, you can see it on all of its glory oh my gosh oh yeah also i feel like the dog would like try to pull the string out and that's possible we are talking about because i don't i don't think there's an option you know this show has gone a lot of weird ways but i never thought we'd talk dog periods and tampons for dogs. Me neither.

But here we are. But here we are. Would you like to start the show, or should we just end it right there? Should we just end it right there? Should that be the end of it? Should everyone just go and subscribe to the show and throw up a little bit in their mouth and get out of here? No, we should start the show. Okay. I think it's your turn. Okay.

I think last time I did the I know it was a rib knock, but it's your turn. Okay. I think last time I did that, I know it was a rib knock, but it's your turn. That was funny. But you see, belts, boys and girls, bros and hoes, you're listening to your favorite thing podcast with... Radio Wells and Brandy. That's who, blood, blood, and who said a rebel radio got the hits reaching the beaches. Wow. So let's talk coronavirus, man.

Oh, man, the corona. I can't even with the corona, dude. OK, I just flew halfway across the world. I'm telling you, it's no big deal. It's not a big deal until it's a big deal. I just think the media is blowing it up so much and freaking everyone out when in reality, it's just not that big of a deal. And I was talking to my mom about it last night. And it seems like the bigger issue is like, if you or I were to catch the coronavirus,

we wouldn't really even show symptoms because our immune systems just like are good enough to fend it off. But the problem is if you're carrying it, like if you're a carrier of the virus and then you go hang out with like your grandma who's like 85 and doesn't have a good immune system, they'll get it and they could die from it. Bye bye, Nana. But like it's it's seriously not a big deal. Like people are freaking out about traveling. The fact that they canceled South by Southwest is absurd. Here's the thing here's the thing about canceling coachella and stagecoach no i know

and here's my here's my thing dude when you come for my money that's when shit gets real and i'm supposed to do something i'm supposed to do some ad at coachella and guess what daddy needs a little bit of money so shut the fuck up you're going to coachella dude i it's it's let me tell you something it's taken an act of god and a large paycheck to get my happy ass over to indio california for this i can't believe you're going dude i know i can't i honestly can't either because after going to the avid things which was so much fun it was like all the bands that i love i was like i'm just too old for fucking music festivals now. Honestly, you might not be going though.

I just, I just, it's so sad to me they canceled South by. Dude, I know. And I guess Stagecoach is going to be done and which is very sad for all of Bachelor Nation because what are we going to talk about in paradise this year? Blake Horseman's going to be real sad.

Yeah. Yeah. But anyway, I just like, I traveled. It was no biggie. They like disinfected the plane really well, which they should do anyway. Not that many people

had masks on. Like it was chill. Here's the thing. I have a fiance who has a very, very jeopardized immune system because of her

kidney transplant. So I am very, I am concerned about like, I don't want to get it. For her, she should definitely be more worried than your average Joe.

Yes. Like, I wouldn't get on a plane if I were Sarah, probably. I was looking at some chart, and it was showing where it is. Oh. It's not in Africa. Africa's like, we have many other problems. Yeah, but not that. They probably have it, but they're like, that is a cold.

I don't know why. That's why I think that's what they sound like. And then the other one that doesn't have it at all is Mexico. Huh? What I've heard is, and I'm not a scientist, so don't even listen to me. But what I've heard is that it doesn't do well in hot and humid climates, which would make sense for Africa and Mexico, which are hot and humid climates. In a weird twist of fate,

how funny would it be if the corona just fucking decimates America and then we're all like, we're going to Mexico, and they're like, excuse me. Thanks for building that wall, you dipshit. You're not coming in.

You're right. That would be pretty cool. Oh, man. That would be, I mean, I don't want that to happen, but like, you know, it might be a little serves you right. Yeah, totally. Oh, coronavirus. Have you seen the meme? It's my favorite meme right now.

It's going around and it's literally like it shows every year from the past 20 years. meme right now it's going around and it's literally like it shows every year from the past 20 years starts at y2k and it has something listed that like the media has been like it's gonna kill us all yeah it's like obviously y2k was like the y2k is gonna kill us all and then it's like sars is gonna kill us all zika virus is gonna kill us all ebola uh swine flu like everything and then now this year it's the coronavirus and we're all still here, you know? It's messing with a lot, a lot of stuff. I saw like Amazing Race is no longer doing that season because of travel. I wonder what's going to happen with Claire Crowley's season of travel for The Bachelorette. Like I said, I've heard that Mexico is safe.

So I do believe that Paradise is going to be just fine. That's cool. It's these type of things that, like, remind people to, like, yeah, you should wash your hands, you filthy monster. Like, if, it's weird that, like, we have these things happen to, like, remind, like, the grommets of our society to, like, wash their hands every once in a while. Yeah.

I also did see that the sales of the beer Corona have gone down substantially because of the coronavirus. Oh, no. And how fucking stupid do you have to be to be like, man, I don't know if I should get that beer because I'm going to get the coronavirus from Corona. Pretty stupid. I mean, those are the people. Why did you talk in a southern accent?

Man, I don't know. That's just what I think they would say. I take offense to that. Man, I don't know. That's just what I think that they would say. I take offense to that. No, I don't. No, I'm sorry. It's not like cute Southerner. It's like that annoying Southerner that definitely. Nope.

You're going down a dark, deep, deep, dark path. It's like a truck that has a Confederate flag flying from the back. That guy. We all know from the back. That guy. We all know. We all seen that guy. You know? Yeah. Just like wrap around Oakley's, you know?

Oakley's are really popular in South Africa. Guy that has a Hard Rock Cafe shirt on, you know? Or a Big Johnson shirt on. Do you remember Big Johnson johnson shirt on do you remember big johnson shirts yes oh my gosh i wish i could find one of those actually anyways yeah corona dude can i give you a least favorite thing right now sure listen i get the tiktok's a thing and i'm happy that people have found a platform and anyone can become TikTok famous. But like if I see another one of these motherfucking flip the switch videos on TikTok via Instagram, I'm going to lose my mind. All right. Explain what this is for those that

aren't cool enough to have a TikTok. All right. Quick PSA for those of you out there who rent. If you haven't heard of built, you're about to thank me. Earning points on rent is now a reality when you pay your rent through Built. You don't even have to check with your landlord to start earning points that you can use towards flights, hotel stays, fitness classes, and even your next rent payment. All right, let me break it down for you. There's no cost to join Built. And as a member, you'll earn valuable points on rent and your everyday spending built points can be transferred to your favorite hotels airlines and even the ones you haven't heard of there are over 500 airlines and 700 000 hotels and properties around the world you can redeem

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or your business has outgrown your old shipping solutions, you need ShipStation to help you scale your business. ShipStation helps you achieve exceptional shipping efficiency with a robust all-in-one fulfillment system that integrates with over 180 of the most popular e-commerce platforms, marketplaces, and carriers. Listen, the holiday season is right around the corner. Odds are that you guys are probably selling stuff on e-commerce. If you're shipping, you got to do it with ShipStation. Lead your business into the future with technology built to save you time, extra costs, and headaches. It's the fastest,

most affordable way to ship products to your customers with discounts up to 89% off UPS, DHL, Express, and USPS rates. What, you don't want to save money? Come on. Deliver a better customer experience with the industry-leading features that help you find the best carrier rates, print labels, and make customer service a breeze, dude. Scale your e-commerce business with shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code YOURFAVORITETHING to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's even more savings. That's ShipStation.com.

Code YOURFAVORIT favorite thing. Do it. Oh, okay. You've seen it. J-Lo and A-Rod just made one a second ago, and it's that song that's like, I just flipped the switch, whatever. Flip, flip. You know that song? It's a Drake song. Yeah. And so usually it's like a girl and her boyfriend dancing, whatever. She's doing her thing, he's doing his thing, and they're wearing whatever they're wearing. And then it's like a girl and her boyfriend dancing, whatever. She's doing her thing. He's doing his thing. And they're wearing whatever they're wearing.

And then it's like flip, flip. And then it goes black. And then it flips. And then the guy's wearing the girl's outfit. And the girl's wearing the guy's outfit. Oh, my God. How crazy. You two kids are so funny with your flipping the switch.

I can't believe how creative you are. Here's the thing that annoys me so much about this. Everyone's doing the same thing. There is no originality in this thing. And social media is supposed to be about fucking you being you and showing the world who you are. You're just fucking imitating everybody else. Fucking think of your own. The first guy, that was funny.

Great. First people that did it. Fuck yeah, bro. But the 7 million other that I've seen, oh, how interesting. It's the same fucking thing over and over again. And I love you, A-Rod and J-Lo. But seriously, no more Flip the Switch videos. I don't make the rules, but that's the rule.

It sounds like it's the new black beatles the mannequin challenge or whatever that black beetle song yes that's that's what this sounds like to me yes everyone's doing the same thing and it freaking annoys me so anyways it's fine i just you're really upset about it honest oh, my God. Now you're wearing a dress, you crazy dude. Oh, my God. Come on, guys. You're insane.

You got any fave things, bro? I'm going to complain for a second here. Okay, if I have like a US of A laptop, right? Yeah. Like I'm an American and my laptop's an American. My laptop should be able to watch hulu and netflix well i guess specifically hulu and hbo content when in south africa because it's an american laptop yeah and i can't like hbo won't work hulu won't work so i had like for two weeks

i just like was in the dark about everything so yeah tried to catch up last night okay i haven't watched the outsiders only one i haven't watched i know you don't watch gray's anatomy and i know this is already a very popular opinion but what the fuck were they thinking writing alex out of the series the way that they're doing it i don't understand what makes them like everybody gets this like glorious exit derrick shepherd uh car uh dies trying to save lives in a massive accident. Has a brain hemorrhage and leaves behind. He has this epic death to exit the series. And then his ex-wife, she leaves the series and gets her own spinoff.

Epic exit because she gets a whole other show. Addison. Addison's her name. And then we have Alex Karev who has literally been on this show since day one we're like 20 seasons in or something this guy's been there the whole time and his exit is that he's he disappeared like four or five episodes ago and it was really vague like what what he was going to do and now all of a sudden like five episodes later his wife is reading letters from him he's sending her letters explaining why he disappeared and he's never coming back letters that make no

sense i'm upset about it what wait are you tell alex karev is not getting a fucking good right ending? He's not. It's not fair. He's been there since the beginning. He's a crowd fave. Freaking Alex Karev deserves better, and that's my opinion. And it's everybody else's too, but I just had to jump in and get on board here.

It's just not right. Do you think it's laziness by the writers, or do you think that that means he's not really gone? No, I think he's definitely gone i wonder if it's either late like laziness from the writers or i wonder and i have no this is a complete speculation you have to wonder if he like bailed on them somehow without really giving them much of a heads up like without giving them time to like write him in an exit you know what i mean like you just have to wonder that the way it all went down. I don't know. Who knows? But anyway, caught up on graze. I started second season of sex education. Did you ever finish the first season?

No. Oh, second season. Really good. Picking up right where we left off. If you haven't seen the first season, it's on Netflix. So it's easy to watch.

If you haven't seen the first season, go watch. It's really, really good. Basically, it's about a kid whose mom is a sex therapist. So she kind of like therapizes him all the time when it comes to sex. But he's like going through puberty.

So it's like an awkward time for him. He goes to school and he has a hard time getting hard-ons. Hard time getting hard-ons. It's funny. It becomes pretty evident that he has really good sex advice for all his hormone-charged friends in high school. So he starts therapizing all his friends. And there's like this kind of like hot blonde who's basically his pimp for the sex education that he's kind of doling out.

And now in the second season, he's like really kind of come into his own. He's blossoming much like Astra is. And he's he's he now can't keep his boner down. Like it's like he's like constantly on a flight where this is always got plain boners. And he's like trying to like not do any more sex education. But like he can't stop because he's good at it. Anyways, the show is really funny. Cast is great.

Season two of sex education. Very nice. Speaking of bonersers that whole thing yeah boners yeah what did you think about the picture i posted where it looks like rye has a boner oh i in our swimsuit pic oh i don't know let me let me go what you didn't notice this no did i like the picture yeah i think man maybe i should unlike it because i don't want to like i don't like his boner okay so it was just funny because literally every single one of these pictures we took that day it looked like that and i was like i can't not post these pics they're just too good and so i was like i asked him i was

like can i post this and he was like i guess so and we all like olivia rachel the photographer we all just decided that it was actually like hilarious that it looks like that. But there's definitely mixed reviews in the comments. He does look like he is fucking at least flying half mast, if not full salute. Isn't that hysterical? Is he just got a huge dick? Is that what's happening? I think it's like that with the combination of those sweatpants are like, usually he wears a shirt with it and it covers it. I think,

Jesus Christ. But I was like, I'm boasting. I think it's fricking hysterical and mixed reviews in the comments. I believe on whether it was funny or not. God, how was your vagina doing after that? You know,

it needs some recovery time. When I come home, the truth, he looks like he's more excited than you. Oh, this commentary, the commentary wells adams thing of right now for this week's pod is probably gold oh okay dang

I don't think it's the pleats I know those were my favorite comments it's the pleats it's an optical don't act like you're not impressed. He's obviously excited. Literally can hear Wells talking about team ticket right now. Oh, man.

I feel like everyone was expecting so much more from me, and I didn't even know about this. They really were. I was expecting so much more from you. Were you guys walking out of pound town were you like leaving the city lines i feel like i feel like we had been to pound town maybe like an hour before we took these photos wow the second one really looks like he like yeah the second one's the one

so good i thought it was hilarious is he like yeah i've got a boner oh i don't know how he sounds but he just kind of like shrugged his shoulders and got like a shy look or whatever and i was like whatever i'm into it it means that you're into me yeah i was like if i could make him a boner 24 7 like i'm down my god you gotta do something about that it's too funny pictures that place looks fucking cool, though. I'll tell you that much. I know this place was dope. Amazing boner pic.

All right. That is one of my new fave things. Rye. Packing some heat, bro. Rye's the new pilot Pete over here. Oh, boy. I'll have to give the windmill a go. Oh, yeah.

Windmill situation. Guess what I started on the flight home. What? Love is blind. Finished it. You've been lost. What? You're done?

Done. Oh my God. Okay. I'm literally only two episodes in. So like don't ruin anything for me. But can we talk about just the entire concept of this? Like the first episode, people were telling each other that they want to get married and putting rings on fingers the first episode yeah like four days in four days into

chit-chatting through a wall never having seen each other never having it done anything i i just can't understand and then they see each other and they're they appear all in yeah explain to me how this is okay yeah the first one is lauren and cameron right yeah i love them say nothing i won't i won't say anything i know i was watching that i like didn't did an instagram story i was like we're 37 minutes into the show and there's already an engagement like get it together bachelor i know it's crazy i think these people are really going into this thinking that this is gonna like this is gonna work for them interesting you asked that question so next week on the wells cast my other podcast i have a

giannina and i don't want to ruin it for you there's a girl named giannina on the show is she the blonde girl yeah she kind of looks like that one model she's a blonde girl i think i know you're talking about blonde hair yeah i have giannina and the guy that she ends up getting engaged to on the show. So I asked her a lot of these questions being like, what were you thinking? Yeah. What are you thinking? She says like in the interview, both of them are like, by the end of it, we were talking like 10 hours a day.

We got to know each other so well. And the other thing that I wanted to know that I asked, I was like, could you be like, what do you look like? Close your eyes right now and try to like imagine, imagine if you've never seen me before. And if I was like, okay, so I'm like six feet tall. I have brown hair. It's like really curly. I kind of look like Benny the Jet Rodriguez from the Sandlot. I don't have very toned upper body and abs.

I have a nice smile. I have dimples. You can kind of see what I would look like, right? I think maybe the producers said, like, don't ask those things. I know, but I asked Giannina, and she was like, yeah, totally. You could totally ask that, and you could say what you look like. And nobody did. No, they did.

They just didn't show that part and the other thing is is that you could talk to other people and be like okay so like what does he look like really oh yeah okay but hold on i'm like really into burnett like is he kind of a douchebag with all the other guys or is he cool like what's going on there you know interesting yeah that's the smart play i didn't really think about that okay the other one i know i'm only two episodes in so this all probably seems quite silly but what's my man's name that wears like is like the flashy dresser and he's into diamond carlton carlton my man carlton he proposes yeah right and then and she says yes or whatever and then he's sitting here in an interview saying you know he's so freaked out to tell her about his past relationships and like his

sexuality and everything like that and he's like i just i don't like i just don't know when the right time is bro the right time was before you asked her to marry you the right time you discussed that's something you kind of tell somebody before you put a ring on the finger. Don't you think? Yeah. My thing with Carlton is I think he needs to work on himself because you haven't seen the rest of the show. So, like, I don't want to ruin it. But like that, that's a man who needs to go work on himself.

I feel like he's setting himself up for failure here. work on himself. I feel like he's setting himself up for failure here. Like, I think if he had been more upfront about it right away, A, like, I feel like somebody would have received that better when you, like, bring it up in the beginning, but also I think he's setting himself up for failure. If he had told her in the beginning and she'd been

like, oh, I can't handle that, and then moved on, then he wouldn't get hurt later on if she can't handle it later on once there's a ring on her finger. I don't know, I just, like, it was sad for him the way he handled it, like don't even know what happens but i just i'm like why did you why are you waiting to talk about this it's kind of like the whole maddie thing in the bachelor like why are you waiting so long to talk about something so important i agree i think i think it has a lot to do with him i think he maybe is it's it's a little bit of what he i

mean you haven't seen the episode there's a little bit of projection of his own self-loathing. He's expecting that to be the response. And so he's scared to tell Diamond all that kind of stuff. And my whole thing is I really do think he needs to go work on himself. He needs to start loving himself before he's able to like love someone else and let someone love him. You know, I mean, I don't know, but I could see some guy being like, yeah, man, you know, I was pretty fluid back in college and you know I kind of see beauty all over the place and I was into good looking guys and I was into good looking girls but

you know I'm in love with you I think most girls most women would be like yeah okay whatever or some would be like yeah that's kind of hot you know he was projecting like that she was going to be angry about it to lose loose for her no matter what you know because no matter how she responds that she was going to be angry about it to lose loose for her no matter what you know because no matter how she responds it's not going to be right because he already

expected her to act poorly because of it i think she was just like whoa let's take a beat you didn't tell me we were hanging out those pies for 10 hours a day and you didn't say hey man you know i used to date guys too you know that's kind of an important thing exactly like you're saying it's a very maddie thing of information that would have been good to know yesterday yeah yeah yeah totally okay the other the only other one on uh on love is blind that i'm just like fascinated by i need to see more is the virgin the dude that's a virgin tell me we get to see more about him we we do not what sorry so what he just like what he's just like lame that no, they don't show anything and he just goes away. There's a lot of people on the show.

And then the people that like aren't getting into serious relationships or getting engaged are like not kind of part of the show going forward. Oh my gosh. I was fascinated by him. Like he's, I think he's in his thirties. He's a virgin and he's going on a TV show where you marry somebody you've never seen before. Like, wow, what I'm at'm what a fascinating person yeah you know barnett is uh is a good character

amber's a great character wait until you really get to meet jessica jessica really is she the marine ex-marine oh no no that's amber as amber amber's interesting uh jessica's the one everyone likes yeah just and it's funny because everyone's like. Amber's interesting. Jessica's the one everyone likes. Yeah. And it's funny because everyone's like, I love your voice. And her voice kind of drives me insane. Just keep watching, sister. All right. All right.

All right. Just keep on watching. Too bad I have like 8,000 hours of Bachelor to watch this week. I know. Well. But I'll watch it. I'll watch it on my flight. I'm going to the Bahamas on Friday.

So I'll watch it on my flight down. Speaking of to the Bahamas on Friday, so I'll watch it on my flight down. Speaking of The Bachelor, oh my God. What just happened? Okay, so everyone needs to understand that we recorded the first part of our show a couple days ago, and now I'm in New York because tomorrow I've got to go on Good Morning America to talk about this last episode. And so we're doing this from the hotel room, and it's fresh. Okay, it's fresh. First of all, first thing is freaking first,

they never addressed why Kelly was in the audience. I know. Why is Kelly there? What the hell? They made it seem like it was such a big deal right off the bat. Chris Harrison's like, Kelly's here. Zoom in. And then left us

completely hanging yeah yeah that was very weird i'm upset of all the things we need to talk about kelly being in the audience is so low on the totem pole i don't know that's what kept me hanging on to be honest with you really i'm so over barb and her facial because they're like resting bitch face i I cannot even handle. The fact that they had Barb as the picture in picture the entire episode. The entire episode. Angry. He hates Madison.

Oh my God. It also likes real hot take, Babs. You're going against the virgin Christian chick? That's what's so crazy. It's like she's going against the girl that's, like, the most innocent, sweetest, realest person on the whole season. Well, I mean, I feel bad for Hannah Ann. But hold on. Can we just rewind the reels real quick?

It's so messed up that they're in the northern territory of australia in the outback and chris comes up and he's like okay i just got some information hannah ann isn't coming and peter's like oh shit man everyone's leaving me and then cut to like commercial break cut to like them like hanging out in like this like little shotgun shack peter's like visibly ill like sweating on the bed and then chris comes in takes off his jacket leans up against the wall like freaking the guy from greece and he's like hannah ann's coming back and he's like really why did you say that i'm just fucking kid. Yeah, I feel like they should have been very sure that she wasn't coming before they said that to him.

Poor guy. Like, jeez. Oh my god, but that whole thing was so awkward. It was the most awkward television I've ever watched, and yeah, that says a lot, I feel. Yeah. You guys thought that Ari's thing was weird?

That was like Sesame sesame street you know yeah in comparison listen i get it barb is great tv and that's why they're giving her so much camera time but like i'm sorry is this the bachelor's mom series like what why is she i don't understand why like her opinion is such a big deal. I don't know because she's so opinionated. Is it because she's great TV? I think it's because she's so opinionated. She needs to take a seat. I mean, yes, but I'm also here for it because –

Because she's good TV. I get it. I'm sorry, but that was the most bonkers thing I've ever seen in my entire life. It was insane. Barb, to me, is than she that she does not have daughters yeah she is such a mom of just boys just so insensitive to madison and just like the whole situation it was just crazy when madison came in picture and picture cut to barb i wrote i know and i like do you think she knew the camera was on her all the time because she would like start

to say something to her husband and then like i think she saw the camera was on her all the time? Because she would start to say something to her husband, and then I think she saw the camera go on her, and then she'd stop. And I so badly want to know. What did she say about Madison's dress? I don't even know. She said something. When Madison walked out,

I saw her say something about her dress or something about the way she looked, I feel. But I couldn't make it out. I was like, oh my God. I feel so bad for peter i feel so bad for maddie i feel so bad for hannah ann i feel so bad for everyone i feel bad for chris because he was just like i know you could see it and like they were telling him like wrap it up but he was like really guys like who gives a shit if if Claire Crowley comes out of here? We got to get more of this Stevie Gold, guys.

Oh, my God. I feel like Peter's mom deserves her own show at this point. That's what I said on SSK today was like, you guys thought The Bachelor and The Bachelorette and Paradise was crazy? Wait until old people Bachelor comes because old people don't give a fuck, you know? They don't give a fuck you know they don't give a fuck they're they're on their way out they'll say whatever and they also come from an era where like there was no politically correctness like she doesn't give a shit you know she's just like fucking i'm going i'm going in hard i don't care if the camera's in here i'm fucking lighting you

guys up and you know what she and like beautiful poor maddie though could you imagine being an adult and speaking to a 23 year old that way yeah i know that means i just i can't understand i if i were i'm sorry if i were peter i would be so embarrassed of my mom but like it's kind of a microcosm of the entire thing like peter never had a backbone this season and like like, that was like the whole thing. Like he needed to be like, mom, you need to stop right now. Yeah. You know,

like I, I feel like if I were Madison sitting there during what just happened, I would be very upset that he didn't stand up for me more and say like, Hey, okay, let's let's, it's time to be done with this. You know?

Yeah. I would be upset about that. And I'm telling you, like Peter seniors kind of a little bitch, too, because he should have been like, oh, totally. You should have been like, hey, sweetie, you need to stop right now because you're making us look really bad. But then they asked him and he was like, he kind of doubled down to. I know he really did. I couldn't believe it. I mean, like they're pot committed, you at this point you know yeah i wanted the brother to come in there

and be like i fucking hate her too oh i know okay but also his mom's reaction when he told them that he proposed to hannah ann i mean she was sobbing she is just not emotionally stable, I feel. Yeah, I agree. There was a lot going on there. There were some issues. Anything else in terms of The Bachelor that we need to talk about? Oh, just... How was Hannah... I mean, I guess this all happened too late.

I just feel like Hannah Ann should have been The Bachelorette. Agreed. Right? Like, she deserves to be vindicated. I agree. And she looked real good coming out. Great. She got some hair extensions. She had a tan.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. If I had my bell, I would ding it, but it's upstairs. How are we not discussing how when Madison was on tonight, she clearly had her hair and makeup done, and her eyelashes looked awesome because a professional did her eyelashes. Yeah, still clumpy.

No, they looked fabulous. Like, she needs to ask that makeup artist exactly what she did. I noticed they didn't, I don't think they put mascara on her bottom lashes and it did wonders for her because she has such great bottom lashes, but you just can't be gooping on mascara

when you got that thick of eyelashes and I think what they did was just do the top and they obviously used a lengthening mascara instead of a clumpy one it was a good move anyways loved Madison's dress too big fan Hannah Ann is like the perfect thing for paradise

is she gonna go to paradise I mean I wouldn't be surprised like she's not gonna be the bachelorette you know might as well go to paradise she's like she is hannah g you know she's like yeah absolutely gorgeous every guy's gonna be after her i would make them pay me bank to go to paradise she dodged a bullet because babs is a mother-in-law is cockroach. Kinda. Worst mother-in-law ever. That's not a good in-law sitch because it's the hard thing with boys. I know this because my mom is so obsessed with my brothers.

They can do no wrong. And it's so hard to have that kind of in-laws because no matter what happens in your life, they're going to fully side with their boy. The mom is for sure you know what i mean yes yes like even what is completely wrong yeah yeah rise fam loves me honestly i feel like they would take my side over his for most things that was the thing freaking babs was taken the whole time was like clapping for hannah ann who was just lighting into her son. It was just so weird. I think she's obsessed with her though.

I think so too. I think maybe she has got a crush on her. All I know is she hates Madison and it's horrible. Poor Madison. I don't want to just be like another person that's saying

that it's not going to work for them because I would really like to think that it will. But how do you be in a relationship when the other person's parents dislike you that much? Yeah. That's hard.

No. It's really hard. Yeah. And it was weird because she was like, everyone knows that this isn't going to work. Which is a terrible thing to say. And it's like, well, it's not going to work because you are going to not let it work, crazy lady.

All right. That was a lot. Wells, I got to shout out one of my favorite new things right quick. Have you heard of Rothy's? Yeah, it's like the online shoe store for ladies and kids, right? Yeah, but it's not just an online shoe store. They are sustainable shoes, and they actually make bags as well. Made for life on the go, they're carefully crafted with eco-friendly materials like repurposed

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They have great seamless thongs that go so well under all of my leggings, all of my jeans. They're great. That's thirdlove.com slash YFT for 15% off today. Do it. Yay, boobs. I was reading something, some Instagram account says facts about the world or whatever. And I saw one that was like, in 1719, prisoners in Paris were granted freedom if they married a prostitute and then moved to Louisiana. What?

Which totally makes sense for fucking everybody in louisiana what do you mean because everyone louisiana is like party animal awesome to hang out with totally makes sense that the people that settled there were like prisoners and who was who was huh yeah kind of similar to australia you know like australia was you know it was all prisoners from like i think england or whatever and that's why like everyone's like you know kind of like kind of crazy and amazing in australia i feel like that's exactly it makes totally makes sense for when you go to new orleans and you're like look at this place jesus christ kind of true and you're like, look at this place. Jesus Christ. It's kind of true, actually.

You know, it's like, man, this place is like run by a bunch of crazy people. Yeah. Yes, I will show you my titties if you throw me some beads. You're right. Okay, you're right. I know. Wow. And this is no slight against anyone in Louisiana or New Orleans or Baton Rouge.

My favorite city in the country is New Orleans. What? I didn't know this. Oh, yeah, man. Dude, culture just fucking oozes out of every nook and cranny of that city. Music. Everyone's an artist there. Oh, you're a street artist?

You're an artist. Oh, you're a jazz musician? Oh, you're an artist. Oh, you're a cook? You're definitely an artist in New Orleans. Everyone's an artist. That's true. I love that city.

It's so old and there's so much history there. It's like dirty and grimy and just fucking awesome. It's like the closest we get to like a badass European city in America. That's true. Yeah. So don't take that badly, everyone that hails from louisiana or close to around there but it makes total sense because y'all are crazy it does make sense you know people send me a bunch of like reviews now to read on the show

now i'm starting to get them too yeah so someone sent me one for a guy that tased himself which is pretty funny and maybe I'll do that one. I've forgotten about one that made me laugh a lot. And I wanted to read it. Okay. And this is the amazing Amazon review detailing the horrors of a giant inflatable beach ball. Okay. Yeah.

Let me get some Sarah McLachlan playing. All right, here we go. Oh, boy. Customer review. Two stars. A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow a hundred bucks. By Reed Hamlin on February 3rd, 2018.

We took this ball to the beach and after close to two hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about ten fun-filled minutes. That was when the wind picked up, sent it hurtling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything

in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sandcastles. Grown men were knocked down to the earth trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us.

Eventually we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it it still can be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina. So there's something to be said about its durability.

Oh my God. Rumor has it it could still be seen stalking innocent families in the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina. So, something to be said about durability. Oh,

that one's pretty funny. Oh my god. Okay okay so i have a theory that people that are pursuing creative writing just go and write reviews for fun yeah uh that is a good one should we do the taser one next week yeah okay we'll do the taser one next week? Yeah. Okay, we'll do the taser one next week. The taser. Oh, oh, oh. Have you ever heard of the show Magicians? No. It's on the SyFy channel, but now you can watch it on Netflix. Our friend Trevor Einhorn is on the show, and that's why I started watching it, because I'm just a huge Trevor fan.

He's like one of the funniest guys ever. Is it like a reality show? like one of the funniest guys ever is it like a reality show so it's like if harry potter and 13 reasons why fucked and made a love child it would be magicians it's like present day wizards that go to like this college they have like normal young adult issues high school college kid issues but then there's also magic and it's really good. Amazed that took me this long to watch, but yeah. And then unfortunately I think the show's coming to an end. I'm not really sure, but really, really good magicians is fantastic. Next week, I want to start watching the show called hunters. Everyone's been like hitting me up about it and

telling me I need to watch it. So you never watched the Witcher. Did you, we watched like a little bit of it and I did like it. Rye is obsessed with it. Really? Oh my gosh, it's all he watched while I was in South Africa. I just couldn't get into it, but he freaking loved it. Yeah. You got any Muzaks?

I do have some Muzaks. What do you got? Piers, what do you think about Katy Perry having a baby? I mean, I didn't think those boobs would get any bigger, but it's going to happen now. You're insane. All right. Haim's got a new song. Have you heard it? No. It's called to happen now. You're insane. All right. Haim's got a new song. Have you heard it?

No. It's called The Steps. Give it a listen. I'm into it. All my clothes. Every time I think that I've been taking the steps, you and them got at me for making a mess. I can't understand. But you don't understand me, baby.

And every day I wake up and I make the money for myself. And though we share a bed to the bed, I don't need your help. Do you understand? You don't understand me, baby. All the ivy is growing sideways. All right. I can dig it. I just really like them. They're just such easy listening.

Yeah. Your boy Dermot Kennedy's got a new track out. That was my next thing. I'll give it a little spin. Your boy Dermot Kennedy's got a new track out. That was my next thing. Can you play? I'll give it a little spin. Give it a little something. It's called Resolution. Control your fear, it's clear That you do not know where you're going to

That you do not know where you're going to So don't you worry You'll be my resolution Characters of no illusion Characters of no illusion You will be my resolution All right, a bit slow, a bit sleepy. One month down All right, yeah, I mean, a lot of my recommendations this week are a bit sleepy to play on the pod, I feel like.

But The National put out a new song. Did you hear it? Oh, God. Do you like The National or no, I feel like. But The National put out a new song. Did you hear it? Oh, God. Do you like The National or no? I don't. It's too sad. You don't like The National? I thought for sure that'd be a Wells Adams band.

No, it's too, like, oh, my God. Like, I do like Sad Bastard music, but that's, like, on a whole new level. Yeah, they're sad. Okay, you don't have to play it, but it's called Never Tear Us Apart. It's very sad. Typical of the band. If you like them, then you'll like it. All right, but I want to hear you don't have to play it, but it's called Never Tear Us Apart. It's very sad. Typical of the band.

If you like them, then you'll like it. All right, but I want to hear it. I want to hear it, because also I want to make sure this isn't a cover. Yeah, god dang it. This is a cover. What's a cover up? Yeah, it's a cover of In Excess,

which, by the way, is funny, because remember I said that I thought that In Excess, I think it was Need You Tonight, had the best intro ever? Uh-huh, you did. Yeah, so yeah, this is an In Excess cover, dude. Oh, that's cool. Well, I mean, yeah, but like... They could never tear us apart.

Bow, dow, dow, dow. Wait for it. There it is. Anyways, yeah, In Excess. that's off a kick yeah kick is a fantastic record by the way all right another sleeper but i i don't know if i'm saying this band's name right have you ever listened to anything by a kilo is that how you say it a-q-u-i-l-o quillo there's a there's a quillo i don't know which one you want to hear? Silhouette? Sober is their new track. Okay. okay so this is what i'm calling brandy's post-sex mix, where she's listening to all this, like, chill music because she's just, like, been sweating and she's just like, I just need to chill out and freaking relax. No, I don't listen to music post-sex, but if it makes you feel good about it, then sure.

I like this band a lot. So if you guys like that vibe, I would recommend going to listen to some of their older stuff. Good Girl is favorite song of theirs and i also like better off without you okay just some wrecks you know i like it oh my boys the week's got some new music out gotta love them you know a little bit of this for them Can't tell a lie She's got a mama's eyes I swear they always keep me guessing Don't act surprised As if I didn't try

Don't smile as if you learned your lesson I don't need nobody, baby, to teach me about romance I've done this dance a time or two I think I remember the steps I don't mind if I eat alone Just like the part that scares me, baby, I Ah, gotta love the Weeks. And the lead singer and the drummer, they're twins, and it was recently their birthday, so happy birthday, guys. Oh, gotta love the Weeks. And the lead singer and the drummer, they're twins.

And it was recently their birthday. So, happy birthday, guys. Oh, wow. Okay. I think that's all I got. Me too, I suppose. I gotta go buy some freaking dog diapers. Go buy some dog tampons.

Ice your vagina. And, you know. Yeah. See you next week. That's brutal. Sorry. I'll be coming at you from the Bahamas next week. Oh, my God. Real tough life. Love from the Bahamas. It's brutal. Sorry. I'll be coming at you from the Bahamas next week. Oh my God.

Real tough life. From the Bahamas. Real tough life. Someone's got to do it though, you know? Oh my God. By the way, I was looking at

some of our reviews. Oh. And I saw a couple people complaining about... Was it last week's episode? I mean, it was just like the most recent reviews

that I was seeing. Three stars. In the words of Victoria, I just can't. This week's episode? I mean, it was just like the most recent reviews that I was seeing. Three stars. In the words of Victoria, I just can't. This week's episode wasn't even an hour long and you guys threw in four different ads. That's a lot of ads for a short episode. Okay, first of all, all the episodes are generally between the time of 40 minutes and an hour. And do you know why that is? Because that's generally the length of

someone's commute. So we're not making like hour and a half episodes because people will be like, I'm not fucking finished with this thing by the time I get to work. All right. So there's a science behind it. Number two, complaining about ads is so dumb because that's all this fucking show is. This show is us talking about shit we like. We are advertising for shit we like. All right? We just don't get paid by fucking Netflix. We don't get paid by fucking HBO. We don't get paid by them, but we are advertising it because we fucking like it. And if we are advertising some shit on our thing that we are getting paid for it's because we fucking like it so stop being stupid also the reality is you can't do anything there no and no no source of entertainment doesn't have ads like youtube has ads hulu has ads there's ads on google

like when you google something everything's an ad to expect there to be no ads is unrealistic yeah but we do we really do like love it speaking of the ads we freaking love i am loving the theragun i know there's no ad this week but i freaking love it i should have taken it to south africa with me because i missed it dearly that's what's frustrating about it's like no but this is shit we like and also like i wish the bachelor would pay us we talk we advertise the bachelor more than any fucking thing in the world you know no one complains they do technically pay you to go to paradise that's true but okay yeah but they don't pay me to be on the bachelorette or the bachelor but very fair i owe them everything okay i owe them my life yeah i just like people are always gonna have negative things to say but i just get so many dms from people that listen to us and

love us every week and say it's like the highlight of their week to get a good laugh in and to get to hang i feel like they're hanging out with us and i just want to tell all you guys that send me those messages that i love y'all and you guys are really the reason that we do the podcast. Totes. Got these like three star motherfuckers that have hate in their heart. Yeah. Also, dude, if you're going to talk shit, give us five stars at least. All right.

Come on. All right. I got to go. Oh, OK. I mean. No, I do too. I got to go. OK.

Love y'all. Love y'all. Love y'all. This podcast has been brought to you by podcast nation.