Your Favorite Thing with Wells & Brandi - Little Shop of Rats with Sarah Hyland

Episode Date: June 5, 2024

I want to be a part of it: New York, NEW YORK!!! Broadcasting live from the big apple (more on that later) Wells is joined by his lovely and talented wife, Sarah Hyland, to talk all of their NYC faves. Plus, she dishes on her new gig in Little Shop of Horrors. Wells expresses his love/hate feelings towards the stinky city, while appreciating the variety of food and the beauty of Central Park. The couple engages in the popular man vs. bear debate (bear, every time) and Wells has a bone to pick with teenage girls who dress like they don’t care about anyone or anything. Our Cali boy has only been in the hustle and bustle a few days and he’s already ready for a break in the Hamptons.  Favorite things mentioned:  New York City  Fire Island (hulu)  Sticky’s chicken  Make Ya Proud by Hovvdy    Thanks to our awesome sponsors for supporting this episode!   Fungies: You can find these yummy gummies in the Vitamin section at your local Walmart or conveniently shop on their website, eatfungies.com. Plus, enjoy free shipping and 20% off with code YFT.  Article: Go to ARTICLE.COM/yft for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more  BetterHelp: Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/favoritething and get on your way to being your best self.     Don’t forget to rate, review, and follow Your Favorite Podcast! Plus, keep up with us between episodes on our Instagram pages, @yftpodcast @wellsadams and @brandicyrus and be sure to leave us a voicemail with your fave things at 858-630-1856!  This podcast is brought to you by Podcast Nation 

All right, guys, a lot has changed over the last years. And if you're growing your e-commerce business, yeah, you can relate. Whether you're looking for better efficiency during the hectic holiday season or your business has outgrown your old shipping solutions, you need ShipStation to help you scale your business. ShipStation helps you achieve exceptional shipping efficiency with a robust all-in-one fulfillment system that integrates with over 180 of the most popular e-commerce platforms, marketplaces, and carriers. Listen, the holiday season is right around the corner. Odds are that you guys are probably selling stuff on e-commerce. If you're shipping, you got to do it with ShipStation. Lead your business into the future with technology built to save you time, extra costs, and headaches.

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print labels, and make customer service a breeze, dude. Scale your e-commerce business with shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code YOURFAVORITETHING to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's even more savings. That's ShipStation.com. Code YOURFAVORITETHING. Do it. Check, check, check, check, check. thing. Do it. Check, check, check, check, check. Broadcasting live from New York City. Can you hear the sirens in the background? That's the Big Apple. What's up, guys? It's your boy, and I have a headache, and I'm in New York City visiting my beautiful wife, Sarah. We're going to do a Wells and Sarah episode today.

I don't know where Brandy is, but it's going to be just us two. So without further ado, let's call her up. Bing bong boom, ding ding ding ding ding. Okay, now you say hi. Oh, hello. Oh, hi. Oh, hi. How you doing? All right, how you doing?. Oh, hello. Oh, hi. Oh, hi. How you doing?

All right. How you doing? I'm doing pretty good. I wasn't sure when I should speaker, Rooney. Yeah, I know. You know, what's funny about the podcast is I always do this preamble where I talk to them before I call Brandy, but it's all bullshit. I start the show a little bit early

so I can do a little bit of an intro and then that was weird because you're just sitting here in the room watching, hearing me do the intro and I didn't love it. I think that was the shortest intro you've ever done. I know. You felt very uncomfortable. I did.

Should I have left the room? Do you want to start over yeah you're gonna leave the room go one without sarah please go into the other room and let me do that again dude i've had a muscle spasm in my eyelid for now two months and if you tell me to eat a fucking banana i lose it everyone says it i mean. It's like I got a pear right there. A pear? I feel like that's... Pears are so beautiful.

Are they? I think pears just look like a real-life painting at all times. Yeah, a lot of Renaissance situations where I feel like I've had pears. A lot of like tableau, bowl of fruit. Tableau? You know. What does that mean? It's like a still portrait paint tag, you know?

Yeah. Like there's no actions, just like a bowl of fruit. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. But in real life, it looks, it's bringing some, you know, Van Gogh into my life. That's good. I'm going to eat it in a little bit. That's fine. I can't try to attempt to destroy this.

Beauty is not forever. It's just in little moments. Wow, it's so profound. Thank you. Speaking of beauty, we're in New York right now. And I went on a run today into Central Park. And I got to say, it's beautiful in there. It is.

It's gorgeous. The rest of the city, hot mess. My gosh. Hot mess. Just stinks of piss and shit. And everyone's yelling. You know, but then you venture into Central Park and it's like you've gone into a different dimension.

You've passed through like the wardrobe in Narnia. Yeah, you're in a portal of sorts. And the lake, because the lakes there are so pretty and people are on boats. And there are good musicians everywhere. And that's inspiring. And my eye's still twitch twitching and then you run around there and then all of a sudden you're thrust back into columbus circle and it's just rent a bike by

the way so they always rented bikes right there's always been like horse-drawn carriages which we gotta get rid of the horse-drawn carriages here please i don't know what we're doing here it's fucking 2024 these horses hate it. Everyone hates it. This city already smells like shit. Now it's got fucking horse shit everywhere. Actually, the horses are the cleanest things here because they have that little flap that catches the poop. But now they're renting out electric scooters to kids,

and I feel like this is dangerous. Oh, boy. Yes. To kids. Oh, yeah. The entire family was getting the scoot dogs and i feel like it's to like scoot around central park yeah to go like on the little running trails and stuff yeah like with like the biking lanes and everything yes and also hey if

you're in central park and you're on a bike stay in the biking lane all right i don't jump in the i don't i don't when i'm running i'll jump in the biking lane and you know yeah it's also bikers it's harder for you guys to turn than for it is for a runner so you need to stay in your situation stay in your lane stay in your lane literally weaving around guy i saw like a middle eastern man explain how an electric scooter works to a like 12 year old boy and i was like this is going to end poorly because the boy's not picking up any of this information you know he's not really paying attention nor do i think he can really understand what he's saying and i know that the the guy renting the scooter gives two shits about his the kid's safety anyways he just wants the

the money and i was just sitting there thinking this is going to end poorly for someone probably that kid probably yeah but anyways um central park is absolutely gorgeous i love it so much and i was saying the other day when we were walking that new york reminds me so much of a disneyland ride and i was telling you how you know i didn't understand what you meant at first but it's so true like today i I was going to CVS to get stuff and people were yelling out stuff. So you know in Pirates of the Caribbean. Tell the people what you mean.

So Pirates of the Caribbean, you know, you're riding along and every scene there's like something happening, right? You know, the guy's getting dunked in the barrel and what does she say? Don't be cheeky, Carlos. Don't be cheeky. Which by the way, I thought it was don't be cheeky, but. Don't be cheeky. Which, by the way,

I thought it was don't be cheeky, but Sarah says it's don't be chicken. Yeah, don't be a chicken. Yeah. Don't rat out. Don't be cheeky, Carlos. Anyways, you know,

every like different turn you come into a different scene of the ride and someone's yelling out something and something's happening and that's like walking around New York City. There's like... There's always something happening everywhere in the happening. And that's like walking around New York City. There's like. There's always something happening everywhere in the world.

I know, but this place, it's so. Apparent. It's so dense. Yeah. It's always a new scene. Yeah. And you're always like the next turn around the bend, you're like, oh my God, there's a Korean lady yelling at someone about their noodles. And then boom, you're thrust into like a new storyline where it's a homeless guy being like,

let me get some food and some booze. And you're like, oh my God, okay. And then you get into the next storyline. And then there are kids who are like Broadway kids who are doing a JoJo Siwa rendition. I saw that yesterday. Every turn is like a new scene on the ride of New York City.

You just went to the most stereotyped people. That's what I saw. Those are things I saw. Am I pissing you off? No. I love the city. I'm just saying as a California boy, when I'm here, I see it through. It's very diverse here. So diverse. And I love that. It's the biggest melting pot. I see it through. It's very diverse here.

So diverse. And I love that. It's the biggest melting pot. I love it here so much. And I'll tell you why, which is funny because I used to hate this city. I love that you can just walk

like three blocks and find like 17 good restaurants. Yeah. I wish we had that in LA. There's always good food around the corner, whether it's like a really nice restaurant or, you know, like your local Whether it's like a really nice restaurant or you know like your local bodega for

like a real yummy Sammy. Yeah. I just went and got some soup from the Soup Nazi. Yeah. It was delicious. Anyways I hate driving around. That's the one thing. I'm so glad to be out of LA because you get to drive everywhere but it's so nice. You can just be like I'm just going to walk over there.

And that thing's really too far away, you know? Not really. 20 blocks is like not the fucking worst thing in the world. No. It's not. It's not. But the reason why we're here in New York is because... Wait, we should start the show.

Oh, yeah. Did I do it last time? Do you know how to do it or do you want me to do it? Bros and hoes. You're listening to your favorite thing podcast with... Wells and. All right, quick PSA for those of you out there who rent. If you haven't heard of Bilt, you're about to thank me. Earning points on rent is now a reality when you pay your rent through Bilt. You don't even have to check with your landlord to start earning points that you can use towards flights, hotel stays, fitness classes, and even your next rent payment.

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ShipStation helps you achieve exceptional shipping efficiency with a robust all-in-one fulfillment system that integrates with over 180 of the most popular e-commerce platforms, marketplaces, and carriers. Listen, the holiday season is right around the corner. Odds are that you guys are probably selling stuff on e-commerce. If you're shipping, you got to do it with ShipStation. Lead your business into the future with technology built to save you time, extra costs, and headaches.

It's the fastest, most affordable way to ship products to your customers with discounts up to 89% off UPS, DHL, Express, and USPS rates. What, you don't want to save money? Come on. Deliver a better customer experience with the industry-leading features that help you find the best carrier rates, print labels, and make customer service a breeze, dude. Scale your e-commerce business with shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code YOURFAVORITETHING to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's even more savings. That's ShipStation.com. Code YOURFAVORITETHING. Do it. This is going to be the New York episode where we're going to talk about-

New York. New York. Billy Joel. Oh my God. Piano Joel. Oh my God. Piano Man. Oh my God. Long Island. Piano Man.

Another Billy Joel. And then what is he? Then he's like, that's a sad one. Yeah. Billy Joel's New Jersey, I feel like. No.

No, it's New York. I thought he was from Allentown, Pennsylvania. Probably. But all of his songs, man, I feel like. No. No, it's New York. I thought he was from Allentown, Pennsylvania. Probably, but all of his songs, man, I don't know. I'm quoting New Girl. In any case, I'm really shocked to hear about your sudden admiration for the city that I grew up in. I have a love-hate relationship with New York. The same way that I have a love-hate relationship with L.A. Yeah The same way that I have a love-hate relationship with LA.

Yeah. If I'm being perfectly honest with you. No place is perfect. No, but I think, you know, I always say this thing of like the reason why I love living in California is because you're like a two-hour drive from like a bunch of cool dope-ass shit. Like you can go to the beach, you can go to the mountains, you can go to the desert, you know, you can go to the forest. And that's very true.

But here, it's kind of the same thing. One, you're like a four-minute walk from a bunch of cool stuff. And then if you leave, this is what I want to do this summer that I'm living in New York with you. I want to venture out into the rich people's shit. What? Like the Hamptons? Yes. I've never been to the Hamptons.

Fire Island? I don't know what that is. Is that nice? It sounds like Fire Island would be nice. Like that island was fire. I want you and Cordova Street to have a little boys weekend at Fire Island and report back. Is it for gay people? Yeah.

Is it? It's predominantly. We can do it. We can have a little boys trip. Girl's trip, yeah. We can go. Didn't you watch Bowen Yang's film, Fire Island, with me?

No, I didn't. No? I think it was on Hulu. Ding, ding. That was a great film. Loved it. Love Bowen Yang. Big fan.

Is he the best person on SNL? Right now? Yes. I think so. I think he is too. I think right now he is. I think Chloe's amazing. She's so good.

She is good. She's good in impressions. She's so good. The guy that does Trump is very good. Oh, he's amazing. Anyways, we're here in New York City for one reason and one reason only. And that is because Sarah is starring in Little Shop of Horrors with Andrew, what is it?

Barth Feldman. Andrew Bart Feldman? Barth. Andrew Barth Feldman, who was in, what was the movie he was in with J-Lo? No Hard Feelings. Yeah. So he plays Seymour. Yes.

You play Audrey. Audrey. And tonight actually is opening night. Tonight is. By the time that, when are you releasing this? You don't know? Is this like a- In like two weeks.

In like two weeks. Yeah. This is like a filler thing. Yeah. I will already have been performing for a bit now. What is your favorite thing about performing Little Shop of Horrors? What is your favorite thing about performing Little Shop of Horrors? I feel like a teenager again, doing it and performing and stuff. I haven't done musicals in well over 10 years, if not 17 years.

So absolutely terrified, nervous, but also feeling very free in the sense of my inner child being joyful and happy and grateful so that's fun my favorite part of the show is actually a number that i'm not in okay um the number's called uh meek shall inherit and it has so many different levels it's so funny it's heartbreaking it's angry it's loving it's so good that's one of my favorite I just love to watch it and listen to it there's a lot of stuff going on during that number let's talk about what this show is because there might be some people out there which I've found this is bonkers to me but that just shows how old I am there's a lot of people out there that haven't seen the movie Little Shop of Horrors with Alan Green and Rick Moranis yeah and Steve Martin but let's just set the table of what the show is about

yeah Seymour is a flower shop owner works at a flower Works at it. Mr. Mushnick owns it. Yeah. And he's kind of like a skinny nerd. He's a botanist nerd. Yeah. He loves plants. Who doesn't? Yeah.

He was way ahead of the cannabis craze. Honestly. For sure. For sure. Maybe that's what this is about. Drug use. No. Maybe Audrey 2 is an allegory for what the sticky icky can do to you. It can kill you.

This is more of a Faustian storyline. Oh, okay. So he works at a flower shop and your character, Audrey, is who? Also works at the flower shop. Okay. We're co-workers at Mushnick's Flowers. And she is a little older. Yes.

It's a May-December relationship. And she is very attractive. Well, thank you. Yes. She's very attractive, but she's going through a tough relationship. Yes, she is. Essentially, the entire story is essentially the entire story is about

seymour just and audrey just trying to get out of skid row they're both in pretty abusive relationships audrey's in an abusive relationship with her boyfriend or in the dentist um seymour's in an abusive relationship with mr mushnick who owns a flower shop. He like took him in as a kid because Seymour was an orphan, but you know, kind of treats him as it was like child labor laws were definitely broken in the past. So they have this very abusive, toxic relationship. There's a total eclipse of the sun one day. And then this plant just shows up out of nowhere.

Seymour brings it into the flower shop. It attracts business. It starts growing and Seymour realizes very quickly that the only thing that it will eat is fresh human blood. Yeah. So it's like a Venus flytrap. Yes. Named Audrey too. Yes. And it starts growing and growing and then also it can talk. Then it can talk. And sing. and sing very well very well very well dance even a little bit yeah then it craves the flesh of humans that's as much as we'll give you because we don't want to ruin what happens but it is but it is like very faustian in the sense of you know seymour creates this deal with audrey too to you know it brings him

all of the things that he's always wanted. He's always wanted a dad. He's always wanted to have Audrey as his girl, uh, to be successful, to make money, to get out of Skid Row and the low, low depressing life that he's only ever known.

And, and same thing with Audrey, who's really like the most innocent and nice of all the people. She's really like the heart of it all to where everyone in this show has made really bad life choices at the expense of others. And Audrey is the only one that is very, very selfless in that regard. So it's really funny. very selfless and in that regard so it's really funny it's a comedy sci-fi horror romance of a show with music and lyrics written by alan menken and howard ashman the late howard ashman and it's just genius and i love it and i'm so excited who are those two people that you just said

uh howard ashman wrote book and lyrics yep. And Alan Menken wrote the music for the show. They also, other famous works of Ashman and Menken are The Little Mermaid, as well as certain songs from Aladdin. They did a lot of work together. Unfortunately, Ashman passed, I believe, in 91. But just icons in the musical theater world as well as the Disneyverse. So very, very grateful. Well, I can't tell you how excited I am to see Knight.

Do you want to sing anything? No. Okay, but I do want to get a little bit of the accent. Oh, no. Because little bit of the accent. Oh, no. Because I've seen the show. I've seen the movie. So I know what Audrey's supposed to sound like.

And I was like, back in LA talking to Sarah. And I was like, can I hear just like what it sounds like? What are you going to be doing? And she did a couple lines for me. and boy, oh boy, are they sexual. Not everyone does an accent for the show, so you were like, are you going to do an accent? I was like, yeah, I think I am. It's hard for me not to

with some of the way the dialogue is written, and so I did it for Wells, and I literally, I got, why I have tears? I wrote this down. I thought it was so funny, so I do a small little line from the beginning of the show. And then I hear on the other end of the phone,

Wells say, this is going to be very sexual for me. Ding, ding, ding. Yes. I could not stop laughing. And then once I finally did, he said, it's my wife, but she's doing my cousin Vinny and it's very hot.

Yes. Marissa Tomei. Marissa Tomei and my cousin Vinny, which I didn't even realize that that is what I was doing. But then I kind of had a light bulb moment of, you know, if I were to describe Audrey in the way that I'm playing Audrey in some way voice and and a bit of personality and stuff it would be as if ariel from the little mermaid and marissa tomei from my cousin vinny had a baby and were combined and then that would be my audrey yeah i mean marissa tomei is so such a strong female character in my cousin vinny yeahny. Yeah. Whereas I feel like, obviously, Audrey is a little broken and meeker, but then she kind of finds her strength, right?

She's always stood up for Seymour. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At all times. She's a very strong and resilient woman, but cowers and shrinks in the presence of her boyfriend. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So can we get a line read from you real quick

just so we can all kind of get... People need to come and see this show. Come on. Just say Mr. Mushnick. Just say Mr. Mushnick. Mr. Mushnick. Oh! Just came a little bit.

Seymour! It's an Audrey too. Could you say, Wells, take off your clothes? No. Come on! Make my dreams come true. No.

Wells. All right, that's good enough. I'm half masked right now everyone should go see the show where they go get tickets what do we do? so you can go to littleshopnyc.com buy tickets we're at the Westside Theater on

43rd and 9th Avenue come see it's a lot of fun and the theater's actually perfect. Like a fun little fact for the listeners, there's a stoop that's part of the set design. And there are two

on each side of the stage. And the one on house right, stage left is exactly designed to be the exact copy of a doorway stoop that is directly next door to the theater. So it's really bringing Skid Row from the street inside. And it's such a fun production.

And everyone is just like the kindest people I've ever met. And just so lovely and caring and kind and it's fun it's crazy the Andrew Barth Feldman is just a revelation so good he's so talented I can't stop talking about it the cast that they've had for this has been really really impressive oh yeah over the past who originated it when it was brought back it was Jonathan Groff and Tammy Blanchard and Christian Borle. Yeah. And then it was Evan Rachel Wood. Recently this year, Darren Criss and Evan Rachel Wood.

Yep. Andrew and I are taking over for Jinx Monsoon and Corbin Blue. Constance Wu and Corbin Blue were also together, right? Yes, last year. Yeah. Same thing with Maude Apatow and Matt Doyle. Yeah, Joy Woods. Joy Woods, yeah.

She's so talented. It's stupid. She's so good. Yeah, they've had amazing. Yeah, you're in rarefied air. You're in good company. And everyone should go see the show. Thanks.

Little shop, nyc.com. Go do it if you're in New York. Yeah. And it's a limited run, so you've got to do it this summer. Come this summer. Hurry up. Come see it.

Don't be a dipshit. Yeah, don't put it off. Don't put it off. What are you doing with your life? Don't be lazy. Little Shop, Little Shop of Horrors, bop, shabop.

Okay. Yeah. Do you know what's something that really grinds my gears? What? Okay. What's grinding your gears what's something that really grinds my gears? What? Okay. What's grinding your gears? High school kids dressed like shit.

Absolute garbage. Okay. And I don't know if this is going to sound creepy or not. I'm not really sure. So I was getting bagels the other day. And this like gaggle of high school girls walk into the bagel place. And they all are dressed the frumpiest I've ever seen. And they're on vacation sightseeing

with their mom, I think. This one girl was wearing jean shorts that went past her knees. Like a culotte? I don't even know. A gaucho? A jean gauch? I don't know.

Jeans shorts past your knees. One thing if you're wearing like... Bermudas? Short, cut off jean shorts. I can live with that, you know? Long jorts. Yeah, like she was like a... Baggy?

Anthropologist digging for dinosaur bones or something. That could be hot. And then another girl was wearing sweatpants. Okay. Comfy. They were walking around on vacation. Another girl was wearing a t-shirt that was way too big. Whatever.

I just remember thinking, like, this is, they all look terrible. And, like, I feel bad for the high school boys. That must be, like, because when I was in high school girls wore I mean I don't need to bring this back but like low-cut jeans yeah fuck that you know yoga pants were a big thing when I was there rocket dogs oh I I still have a pair of rocket dogs like they at least tried to look somewhat cute for the boys. Now these girls are wearing sweatpants and jorts that go past the kneecap. Maybe.

What? Girls are tired of dressing cute for boys. No, I don't need this to be turned into a... TED Talk. You know, a statement about, you know, bear or man in the woods conversation bear every day that's bear over man every okay let's talk about that so i'm sure you've seen it on social media

but the whole thing is that um a woman asks a man hey would you rather leave our daughter in the woods where there was a bear or there was a man. Which one would you rather leave? Is that how it originated for like leaving our daughter in the woods kind of stuff? Oh, wow, I didn't know that. And the guys are like, well, who's the man?

It's like, I don't know, it's just some man. It's like, okay, and what about the bear? And so, because everyone's saying they would rather take the bear. You're doing it right now.

You'd rather take the bear than the man. Yes. But there's a lot of nice men. Like, what if I was the man in the woods? there's a lot of nice men. Like what if I was the man in the woods? There are a lot of nice bears. Are there? Yeah.

I mean, but bears can maul you to death. So could a man. I guess. I guess if you... That's very true. It's very true. I guess if you taught the woman how to do the, Hey bear!

Hey bear! hey bear. It depends. Some bears you have to be quiet. Some bears you have to be aggressive and loud. Depends on like the black bear, grizzly bear, those kinds of brown bears. They're all different in how you respond to it. But at least you know what you're getting with the bear.

I guess. Yeah, you're getting with a bear. I guess. Yeah, you're getting maybe killed. There's only like, there could be so many more things could happen with a man. Yeah, but I think that death is last. Yeah, and the torture beforehand. I know, but I just think the odds of a man raping and murdering a woman is much less than a bear attacking a woman. I think you should look at the percentage of bear attacks versus sexual assault attacks. Maybe so.

I get it. It's a good question to ask a man. I think it's a good question to ask and just make it. I love that it's become viral because men are so confused by the fact that why would women choose a bear in the woods over a man? But it's like a teaching moment, you know? The philosophical questions. Bear or man? Bear every day.

Bear every day. You like bears, though. I love bears. What if it's a mama bear with her cubs and the mama bear is upset? Oh, I would try and do everything not to cuddle those cubs because I know what would happen. But stay your distance. Fair enough. Anyways, high school kids, try to dress a little like you care a little bit.

That's what I'm saying. Maybe they don't care, though. You should care. That's a big part of life, is caring. How you look. You should always present yourself as if, you never know who you're going to run into. What if I was a casting director?

Do they want to be actors? Maybe they do. And I said, you know what? You guys are great, but you don't give two flying fucks about how you look. When you go out, you're wearing sweats and you're wearing jean shorts that go past your knee. What's happening here?

You should have a little more self-respect. I find it interesting with fashion with this younger generation. I've seen a lot of it. Lauren Zima posted something about it where she was at like a bar or something. And all of the girls there, the younger girls there

were like wearing sneakers like at the bar. Yeah. Cute outfits, but still with sneakers. And she was like, what is, like we would have never been caught dead

at a bar with like Converse or Reeboks on, you know you know yeah like we trudged through snow in our jessica simpson platform heels with our business casual pencil skirts and uh tight tops a going out top and a statement necklace with a big chunky belt just to go to the club and these young people now are comfortable and good for them i'm fine with the shoes that doesn't bother me but it's still a thing of like i feel like now they're really focusing on comfort before anything else and maybe it'll it'll go back yeah i don't know it's all it's all cyclical it really is I mean I've never seen so many y2k I've seen a lot of low-rise pants recently a lot of

tube tops yeah that's straight those kind of stretchy shirts it scares me I'm scared it's not good I don't it wasn't the greatest yeah dresses over jeans no thank you let's leave that in the past You know what also annoys me about what new, not even new kids, but it's just like new vernacular for women especially, is the like, we love a sympathetic king. We love a man who has a bank account. You don't like we love? We love a 6'5 unemployed king.

Why does it have to be we? That's what you like. I don't like someone else saying that's what we all like. You don't speak for me. I don't love a sympathetic king. I'm speaking on behalf of all my multiple personalities. Okay. All of us.

We as a collective. The royal. Is that what it is I don't know for me it's a good joke at least you don't like that but then you also don't like it's giving

I hate it's giving guess what I heard you say it's giving the other day in an unironic way what did I say maybe you were talking about the jorts girl. But I was sitting on the couch right over there and you said, it's giving blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And I was like, ah, he said it. It was ironic. It was ironic. You didn't have an ironic face on. That's the bit. It's ironic. I just hate giving. It's giving because it's telling, not showing.

It's giving me nothing. It's giving me nothing. It's giving me a fucking headache. I saw this, which I thought was really, really interesting. Okay? Okay. It's this girl who found this, and it's like a woman complaining about how her husband said that he was going to be done playing golf

at like three o'clock and now it's five o'clock and he's not around. And then she started looking at the comments. And then she sent it to her boyfriend to be like, look at these comments. This is really funny.

And then she realized that the comments that were being shown to her were not the same comments that were being shown to him because it was pulling comments that would more align with the guy's views on the video and then hers were more aligned with the woman's view was going to be this is the most insane example of how everyone is experiencing

completely different social medias at the exact same time. Like this video, my boyfriend said he'd be over by three after golfing. And like, it's just her every half an hour taking a video saying, oh, he's still not here. And it gets like five or 6pm and he's still not here. Okay. I opened the comments of this video and kind of, as I expected, everyone was saying, oh, that's really rude. It's the disregard of her time. I don't like him. Did he communicate with you? If not, then that's really rude it's the disregard of her time i don't like him did he communicate with you if not then that's a red flag okay fair enough you know i send this video to my boyfriend who sat next to me and then i said to my boyfriend lol look at the comments bear in mind these comments were coming up at the top of the list so as soon as you open the comments these are the ones that came up for me tell me fucking why my boyfriend opens the comments on his phone

that again it's the first list of comments that come up it's the same time on the same video or you get your own hobby instead of waiting around for him like god forbid he has a good time he went before 3am he's ahead of schedule no fucking wonder we're all so divided when you can look at the same comments on the same video and it'll change them based on who you are and i presume based on like other activity in the app because people look at the fucking comments of a video to gain perspective and see how everyone feels about that video like i do that i think everyone does that so if we're looking at it from two completely different angles and the only thing that i can assume really that's that different about our interactions with Instagram is that he's a guy and I'm a girl.

And so obviously these are all like on his side and all of mine were on her side. Anyways, you get the idea. Yeah. It's pretty messed up, right? So the top comments,

when you open comments from his to hers were different, they were just in a different order, but it's not like she can't see the comments that he sees if she scrolls down. I guess, but there were thousands and thousands of comments, so I'm not sure she would have ever seen them. So basically what the algorithm is doing, it's figuring out who you are,

the comments that you would align with mostly, and then putting those comments up the top for you so you feel just validated and justified in the comments. Wild. And so, and she's right. She's talking about how this is very divisive because it's making, it's whatever you think is right is right here. Right? Instead of being like, well, this person is saying something different.

So maybe I should rethink how I'm thinking about this. Yeah. Let's change the perspective. Are all the man versus bear comments on your page geared towards men? Because if that's the case, they're definitely geared towards

women for me. No, I think mine are still, mine's a lot of like women being like, it's so funny that men are having a hard time with this. We love a sympathetic king. That was good. Thanks. Anyways, I do think TikTok is the worst thing ever yeah even though i use it so much you really do it is a good resource for me especially doing this show yeah gives you a lot of materials here's the thing though is that i see stuff tiktok that i've seen on instagram and vice versa yeah guys can we just have like one place? Can we just have one thing?

Just one. Why do I need seven things? It doesn't make any sense to me. You know, I heard X, formerly known as Twitter, they're bringing back Vine. So now there's going to be that, which is... Vine. I know.

The 15 second thing. I think it was seven seconds. Oh yeah, it was probably even shorter. Anyways. Do you have anything else? Any other favorite things? Mm-hmm. One of my favorite things the past few weeks has been, yes, working on Little Shop and with everybody.

But the bodega on the corner of the theater, I used to eat there a lot because one of my best friends in high school lived across the street in Manhattan Plaza across the street. So we would get food there a lot. And I always got the chicken Parmesan panini with a bag of like those Fritos like honey. They're like twisted. Like the twisty thingies and then a raspberry Snapple. And I have been having that almost every day yeah since i've been here and i feel like i'm 15 years old again yeah that's great um you should tell j-lo that order small bag of chips ham and cheese orange drink you know they'll know what i mean if

you know you know you know the fuck are you talking about? I'm not even from New York, and I was like, you're not going with chopped cheese? I feel like that's a big thing. I used to get a bacon, egg, and cheese in the morning. It was good. That would be my breakfast at the bodega, but then for lunch, I would get the chicken panini,

or sometimes I'd walk up to pick a bagel from school and get a turkey sandwich on an everything bagel and that shit slaps One of my favorite things about New York recently is all the questions that I've been asking about New York to a Native New Yorker who not having all the answers for me But we have come across a lot of answers vis-a-vis that's what the google's for yeah so my first question was we went to dinner with sarah's parents and i said because you know once the pandemic hit they made everyone go eat outside so there's all this outdoor eating which is like in basically parking spots yeah in front of the businesses and i said what and i asked this to our parents i said as new yorkers do you like this or do you hate this?

And your mom was adamant and said, I hate this. And I said, okay, interesting. Tell me why. Because for me, I'm like, oh, it's kind of charming. It's very European. Yeah, I love dining alfresco. Alfresco? Alfresco?

I think if you're a woman, it's alfresco. Wonderful. I don't know. And I was like, oh, interesting. Tell me why. Because I think of that as being like so charming and like so like, you know, Mediterranean or whatnot. And your mom was like, there are these shitty little shanty houses built on parking spots that are just rat hotels. And I was like, what do you mean rat hotels?

And she's like, yeah, the rats live underneath the buildings and then go in there. Yeah, like the platforms. Yeah, then go and sleep in there at night, I assume. And they're disgusting. And I was like, oh, gross. Now I don't want to sleep in there and then in at night i assume and they're disgusting and i was like oh gross now i don't want to go in there at all because it's good i'm sure like every table's got rat poop all over it or rat yeah you know traces of rat the rat problem in new york has gone up immensely since because of why i think because of all of the outdoor yeah seating stuff i think that's a i think that's a very probable cause of it.

But I think some of them are cute. Some are cute. I like the ones that are on the streets, not like on the avenue. That's too much. It's too busy. An avenue is a street. No, like the streets.

Like 52nd Street on 52nd instead of like on 9th Avenue. Oh, like the streets. Like 52nd Street. On 52nd instead of like on 9th Avenue. Oh, not the rats. The little outdoor eating areas. Yeah. Can you imagine if I was like, I only like rats. That's what I thought you were saying. That are on the streets and the rats on the avenue can fuck themselves.

You think you're too good for the streets, rat? Oh, yeah. Oh, you're going to live for the streets, rat? Oh, yeah. Oh, you're gonna live on the avenue, rat? You're gonna be on the main thoroughfares, Broadway. Okay, we get it, rat.

That's so funny. So then the second question I had, because great about New York is that it's a grid system, so it's kind of very easy to learn your way around. It's so funny.

Sarah's always like, it's always uptown and downtown. I'm like, what the fuck are you doing? You're also like, it's west of something and it's east of something

I'm like I don't know how you know that what are you fucking compass over here I am it's a grid it's so easy I get that

so my other question was because you know if you're on like west 53rd right I was like what is it west of and then where does it turn

to east 53rd like what does that happen and you didn't know this once we looked it up. I was like, is it past Broadway? I was like, I can't remember if it's like sixth Avenue and his fifth Avenue.

I would have assumed it would have been seven because seventh is Broadway. Correct? No. Six is Broadway. Broadway is Broadway. No. Eighth Avenue, Broadway.

And then seventh. Oh, it is. Yeah. Oh, I just thought Broadway was seventh. No, I assumed it would Broadway too,

because that would be like the, it's the broadest of the ways. So, I mean, Broadway was seventh. No. I assumed it would Broadway too because that would be like the, it's the broadest of the ways. So. I mean, it cuts down the middle though, like on a diagonal. Oh, it does. Yeah. Broadway cuts.

Anyways, we found out that anything west of Fifth Avenue is on the west side and anything east of Fifth Avenue is on the east side. Yeah. That's how it's denoted, which I thought was very interesting. Yeah. And then what was my other question that I had? Big Apple. Oh yeah. Where did that come from? I thought was very interesting. Yeah. And then what was my other question that I had? Big Apple. Oh, yeah.

Where did that come from? I had to Google that. That was from horse racing. Horse racing. Like, get the Big Apple, like a big prize. Yeah. Yeah. And I think it wasn't, I think it started to be known as the Big Apple.

Like, I'm definitely getting dates wrong, but say like the 20s or something, but I don't think that New York used it as marketing term for tourism until the 70s, I think is when they started using the Big Apple

as like a tourism marketing ploy. And then the last thing that I've been really, really keen on is it's Fleet Week here in New York. It is Fleet Week.

And if you don't know what Fleet Week is... Watch Sex in the City. Yeah. So basically, I guess all the sailors in the Navy, they come to port, and the city is overrun with a bunch of sailors. With semen. With semen everywhere.. With semen everywhere.

There's semen everywhere. White semen uniforms everywhere. Yes, everywhere. And I was like, do you think that they have to wear a uniform? Like if they're commanding officers, like you go out there, you have to represent. Yeah, represent the government. The army or the navy. And you need to wear, or do you think they're like, if I wear this. There's a good chance I'm going to get laid.

Someone's going to fuck me. For sure. Because I'm a hero. I also think it's like. Oh do I get free drinks maybe. Oh do I get a free shot. You know. Oh thanks for the beer.

Yeah I serve. Oh my gosh. Thanks for. Thanks for your service. Here's a shot. Yeah exactly. Yeah. Anyways there's so many semen just running all about.

There's semen everywhere. Everywhere. This city. All over the streets.'s so many semen just running all about there's semen everywhere everywhere this all over the streets sticky with semen sticky with the semen fleet week is always fun in new york because there's so many jokes to be made yeah well just it's really just the jizz jokes yeah yeah a lot of just jokes but they overrun the bars and restaurants and stuff. I always think it's a comical type of thing, but it can get really frustrating. You know, like when you're just trying to go to like your local bar and they're just all up in there getting loud and crazy and loose,

those little hooligans. But when I was a teenager, I was obsessed with Fleet Week. Yeah, because you wanted to get some of that. Oh yeah, please. Going to high school in Midtown where all of them are trolling for ladies. It was illegal for them

but I would. You didn't care. I did not care. I would flirt my way or at least just stare. Okay, would you rather come across a sailor or a bear in the woods? Still bear. Okay. Always bear.

Oh, the last thing that I want to talk about with New York, which I really, it's so funny because I realized it happening to me today and I've only been here for a couple of days, but we were walking the other day and, um, you know, someone, someone yelled out like, why the fuck are you stopping in the middle of the street? And like kind of yelling towards us. But it wasn't really us. But maybe he was talking to us. I'm not really sure.

And my whole thing is that like when Sarah and I go on, whenever we walk anywhere, whether it be in New York or in Los Angeles or in Paris for that matter, she's always walking so much faster. In front of me. And I'm always going to be like, can you slow down? And also I've got a foot on her in terms of me and i'm always gonna be like can you slow down and also i've got a foot on her in terms of like leg length yeah and she's still like go go gadget gonzalez and always like we just chill like where are you trying to get to and then we realize that i come from california where i'm like a laid-back like surfer soul you know and like where am i going i'm on island time and sarah lives in new york where it's like go go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

We got to make the deals. We got to make the deals. We got to get to, you know. Yeah. So it's very much just like the type of different type of people that we are. And the other day I started to complain about something. And then I said to you, no, I'm not going to let this city get to me. Yeah.

I can't. You started talking a little bit like a New Yorker. No, I didn't. I wasn't like, hey, yo, get the fuck out. I wasn't like that. But I was like, damn it. No, you were like, that guy was fucking right. Yes. Well, because it's annoying.

It's like when you're in an airport and someone's walking, you're walking and someone's in front of you, and then they stop, and you're like, what the fuck are you doing? Yes. See, it's happening. Yeah, see? The city. Slowly becoming just like one of us

Well it happened to me with a biker today Oh yeah He came He like biked onto the sidewalk Uh huh You know like right where like a crosswalk was One of the Uber Eats dudes Yeah and he was like coming off

Those guys are overrunning this city And like I had the I had the walk signal so I was going then he comes in and I had to stop and I was like what the fuck?

Did you scream that? No I was like Oh man I wish you did. I gave the look like what are you doing? And then I was like no do not let this city get me. It's fine.

He's just trying to do his job. I'm just trying to get somewhere. The other thing that's great about New York People get eaten alive if you still act like that here. I know. The other thing that's great about New York. You will get eaten alive if you still act like that here. I know.

The other thing that's great about New York is the anticipation of lights. New Yorkers love to anticipate lights. Because the streets are all one way, you really only have to worry about traffic coming from one direction. And so what every New Yorker does is they stop at a cross section and then they look over and they look at the streetlights. And if it's turning yellow or if like that counter is coming down to like 15, 16, New Yorkers are like, fuck it, we're going. We can make it. Instead of waiting for that little light, the walk-in light. Why would I wait when there's no cars coming?

I know. That's stupid. Because it's the law. Okay? Sure. And so now I'm starting to do it where i'm like i can fucking go you know it is i mean we really are the exact replica of where we grew up 100 you're such a california boy i'm such a new york girl i love that you're finally like able to recognize like why I walk the way I do

the thing about it is is that like walking places is annoying you're having to weave there's I'm great at weaving there's homeless people like bugging you for shit or yelling and you're like I gotta get the day away from that person or whatever that person's like you know going crazy the enjoyment of the journey is not there it's the destination here in new york it's like we got to get there we got to get to the restaurant right yeah but like where i come from where are we going look at this chill this is nice but i now i understand it where it's like it's there's no enjoyment walking 15 blocks you know through a construction zone for homeless people that are going doing are yelling crazy stuff at you

and dodging bikes. So I understand wanting to get there fast. Yeah, you stroll in Central Park. You walk fast on the streets. Yeah, but you know what? And on the avenues. But life is about the journey, not the destination.

Well, I have a new favorite thing. Oh, what is it? Ding, ding, ding. Ding, not the destination. Wow. I have a new favorite thing. Oh, what is it? Ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding. This place, this chain, this food chain did not exist in New York when I lived here. Okay. I'm very upset about it, but now I am obsessed with it. It is this place called Stickies.

Okay. It's like chicken fingers and with all these different types of sauces. And they have like the best fries as well as like amazing Cajun fries as well. They do like fingers and poppers. They have like vegetarian options I think as well. I like to get the 12-piece chicken popper basket with Cajun fries. And the Thai sweet chili sauce with hot honey oh boy when you combine like a french fry a chicken popper and hot honey it's like your own little mini chicken and waffles

it's really good love it and i love it so much i had it I didn't love it yeah you're not a fan but I am you want to go out in a song? I want to be respectful of your time I feel like you got stuff to do I know I have my first show tonight I gotta warm up that's it for now

I love you and I have a lot of new songs that I love you do we were playing them the other night we did do a whole thing. This is a band called Hovde that I've been liking a lot. There's a song called Make You Proud. We'll go out on this. All right, Wife Tears.

Thanks for coming and hanging out for the New York episode. Yeah, thank you so much, guys. I miss you and I love y'all. Please, everyone, come see Sarah's show, Little Shop of Horrors. Yes, it's fun. Come say hi after. Come say hi after. Yeah.

You come out and you say hello to everyone and all the fans. Yes. You take pictures. Yeah. You sign playbills. I'm assuming so. You're going to get so sick from all the people. Well, don't come see me if you're sick, please.

Yeah, don't do that. Yeah. Maybe not. Yeah. Or wear a mask. Wear a mask. If you're sick. Yeah, and also put on

some... Hand sanitizer. Some sanitizers. Yeah, yeah. Have a glass of wine. Enjoy the show. Yeah. And be sexually aroused

by her New Jersey accent. My Marissa Tomei. My Marissa Tomei. My biological clock is ticking over here. My biological clock is ticking. All right, YFTers, we love you. Love you. Okay, bye.

Bye. Come on, man. You need strength. Everyone needs a little more time. God damn, don't let all of me go. Thanks, babe. Thank you. I love you. I love you.

Stay in the voice. Okay. Do it. No. This podcast has been brought to you by Podcast Nation.