Your Favorite Thing with Wells & Brandi - Looking for a man in finance

Episode Date: May 8, 2024

Please welcome a very special guest to the podcast, Erotic Grandpa, who has been doing lord knows what on his time off. He’s very excited to read you an excerpt of Fourth Wing. Your hosts then enjoy a rare bonding moment over their weird-shaped heads before diving into all the Hollywood Tea including Taylor destroying Kim and Kendrick destroying Drake. They then chat Brandi’s type, ethics of the Kentucky derby, Lando winning his first race, and Gatorade making water. Wells has a bone to pick with streaming services and shares his thoughts on the Dance Moms reunion before discussing the difference between charm and charisma and which of them has what. Enjoy!  Favorite things mentioned:   Under The Bridge  Dance Moms: The Reunion  The Idea of You  Wondering Why by The Red Clay Strays   Drowning in Nostalgia by Mat Kearney   Are You Looking up by Mk.gee  kid by Stephen Wilson Jr.    Thanks to our awesome sponsors for supporting this episode!   Boll & Branch: Get 15% off your order when you use promo code FAVORITE at bollandbranch.com. Exclusions apply. See site for details.  Article: Go to ARTICLE.COM/yft for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more  Betterhelp: Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/favoritething and get on your way to being your best self     Don’t forget to rate, review, and follow Your Favorite Podcast! Plus, keep up with us between episodes on our Instagram pages, @yftpodcast @wellsadams and @brandicyrus and be sure to leave us a voicemail with your fave things at 858-630-1856! 

All right, guys, a lot has changed over the last years. And if you're growing your e-commerce business, yeah, you can relate. Whether you're looking for better efficiency during the hectic holiday season or your business has outgrown your old shipping solutions, you need ShipStation to help you scale your business. ShipStation helps you achieve exceptional shipping efficiency with a robust all-in-one fulfillment system that integrates with over 180 of the most popular e-commerce platforms, marketplaces, and carriers. Listen, the holiday season is right around the corner. Odds are that you guys are probably selling stuff on e-commerce. If you're shipping, you got to do it with ShipStation. Lead your business into the future with technology built to save you time, extra costs, and headaches.

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print labels, and make customer service a breeze, dude. Scale your e-commerce business with shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code YOURFAVORITETHING to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's even more savings. That's ShipStation.com. Code YOURFAVORITETHING. Do it. Okay. You guys ready to do some podcasting? Are we ready to do it up? Bell, bellin. Microphone, micin. Voice, sultry and sweet. Camera, on. Lights, electrified. And I can't forget this. So I've already read Fourth Wing or listened to whatever semantics. I absorbed the material vis-a-vis a sense. It wasn't visual. It was audio, but I still absorbed the material dick

and everyone learns differently guys. Okay. And I'm a super ADHD and I can learn audibly, but I can't read anything. I mean, I can, but I hate it. Dude, when you're ADHD like me, ADHD like me, I'm looking for a man, ADHD like me, trust fund. When you're ADHD like me and you're freaking dyslexic like me, dude, words just are hard to see, bud. You know, this is a lot. Well, I can hear it just fine. So anyways, I don't know why I'm telling you this, but I have the book, Fourth Wing, because Sarah bought it. I was thinking maybe sometime during the show, I would read a portion of a sex scene from Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros with Dirty Grandpa, because he hasn't been around for quite a while, and he misses his YFTs.

And he recently read the book Fort Wing by Rebecca Yarrows, and he was very astonished by the sexual nature of a book about kids in dragon school. So later i will try to remember to do this i'll read the first sentence for you before we call the brand i'd get you all hot and bothered about what is to come when a erotic grandpa comes back on the show did wells google sex scenes in fourth wing pages yes is that a weird google search and if it shows up in some sort of deposition, will it be hard to explain? Maybe. But this is on page 376. He glides the fabric of my underwear across my clit.

And my back arches at the burst of pleasure that radiates through my body. So sweet. I can taste it. Yeah, this was a book that I thought was YA, and then I got to stuff like that, and I was like, whoa. Are we talking about the little man in the boat? Are we talking about the little, are we talking about the double-clicking the mouse here? What are we doing?

So yeah, anywho, how's everyone doing? I'm doing great. I'm feeling good. I'm getting in fighting weight. I'm getting in shape. All right. I gotta look good for something coming up. And you know, I've really curtailed the drinking, which you guys should be proud of. Cardio like crazy. I've honed in on the fact that gluten is my enemy, which I hate because I love gluten. I'm feeling good, man. But my beautiful wife has left me. Not like in the sense that we're divorcing. She moved to New York because she's going to go do a little show called Little Shop of Horrors. And I'm so

excited for her. They finally announced it. I've known her obviously for a while. So yeah, she's in New York, so I'm all by myself with the boo and nader, but I will be going to be with her later in the month. And I got to be honest with you guys, I got some things coming up in terms of work, but I might be like a New York kid for a while because she's got like a, you know, it's like a five month run or whatever. And I can't be away from my beautiful bride. So it might be a New York boy. And this California boy is scared about being a New York boy because New York is the hustle and the bustle and everyone is in a hurry and everyone is angry

and it smells like pee pee all over the place. And I'm not saying that Los Angeles is much better, but it is. And also I'm a California boy and I live, it's like island time, like I'm chill, you know? Everyone in New York is like having a nervous breakdown and a panic attack every moment of the day. And like, now we can't even get on the subway because it's like super dangerous. So then it's like, well, you got to go Uber everywhere.

But I'll tell you what, I do love New York because you can't walk everywhere. And I love to walk, but I don't walk the speed that every New Yorker walks, which is Mach seven and being like, get the fuck out of my way. I like to just stroll. I'm six foot tall. I can go, but I don't need to break the sound barrier to get to Duane Reade's. I don't need to break the sound barrier. I don't need to go 99.9% of the speed of light to get to a Dwayne Reed. Where are you going, everybody? Whatever. We should call the Brandi. Let's call her up. Oh, yeah. It's time to start the show.

Hello. Hello. What's going on? I have a weird shaped head. Yeah. You know, before I called you, I was like, Brandi is going to start the show with, I have a weird shaped head.

Can't believe I nailed that. Huh. Interesting. Yeah. Why do you have a weird shaped head? Were you, were you born of cesarean section? I don't know what that is, but I never thought I had a weird shaped head. Yeah.

Until I started like wearing baseball hats a lot. And there's just something about my head that doesn't fill out the hat right. Yeah, well. Have you ever noticed that about me? Well, I have the same problem. You do? Absolutely. You have a small head then.

It's very small. I wear a child-size helmet. Yeah, I'm the same way. I have a very small head. It runs in my family. The Addams family is notorious for needleheads. So you really have to work hard in finding a good hat. Yeah.

Because for me, what happens is this hat obviously is a good one. But like a normal like trucker hat, if I put it on, it goes like way, it like pushes my ears down. You know, like it's like way too deep. Then if I, you know, if I keep it above the ears, then it looks like I'm wearing like a top hat. Like I'm, you know, Abe Lincoln over here. Did you get that hat? Why does that one fit so good? Yeah, I don't know. This one is a good one though. You got to look around. I'll tell you what hat you want to look at. The Nike tennis hats. They are very, very good for small headed people. See how like it like sits on my ears. Like it goes over my ears. That's how small

my head is. Speaking of struggling, how are you doing? Way better. Okay, good. Thank God. I mean, I do have sunglasses here because it was a vibe last episode, so we could go there, but I mean, I just got off a horse, so I don't look great, but I

feel way better. That's good. That's good. It took me until yesterday. That's good. I've been doing a new thing. I was telling the wife tears really. I've been feeling good. Cause I've been working out a lot, been eating really healthy and staying away from the gluten, but I've also stopped drinking. And that's not that I've stopped drinking, but I saw this thing on Tik TOK and it was like, you just need to like rewire how you think about drinking. And it's like, once you start feeling like buzzed, like feeling good, stop. Yeah. And then that's what I do. That's a normal person's drinking habits. That's, I just always have like, we're going to keep going. I feel good now. More alcohol will make

me feel better, but that's not the case. So then once you get to the buzz, then you're like, all right, let's ride this wave. And then once the wave ends, then you're like, okay, now I'll have another white cloth or whatever. and then you always kind of just feel pretty good and then the next day you don't feel like a complete piece of garbage yeah for me i guess because i'm such a lightweight but like even if i just have one or two i still don't feel good the next day oh really except if i stick to champagne that's been really good to me That's shocking because that's usually what everyone gives everyone hangovers. I know. Yeah. There is so much happening in the news right now that I am just. Lots happening. Also, it was just a big weekend last weekend. Yeah. Met Gala today, you know. The Met Gala. Do you think that Kim Kardashian is going to go to the Met Gala after

what happened to her at the roast? Oh, I didn't watch the roast. You have to tell me all about it. to the Met Gala after what happened to her at the roast? Oh, I didn't watch the roast. You have to tell me all about it. Dude, the tea is piping hot. Damn, I forgot about the roast. Dude, oh my God. Okay.

Why didn't I watch that last night? Damn. Okay, you gotta watch it. Yeah. Yeah, one of my favorite things. I'm not ready for that. Should we start the show or no? Yeah, let's just start the show and then we'll get into it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay, okay, okay. It's you, I think. Okay, great. Bros and Os, you're listening to your favorite thing podcast with... Wells and Brandy. All right, quick PSA for those of you out there who rent. If you haven't heard of Built, you're about to thank me.

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Lead your business into the future with technology built to save you time, extra costs, and headaches. It's the fastest, most affordable way to ship products to your customers with discounts up to 89% off UPS, DHL, Express, and USPS rates. What, you don't want to save money? Come on.

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the biggest news in town. Okay. Well, if you haven't seen it netflix is doing netflix as a joke where they're just releasing a bunch of comedy content right now and one of the things that they released over the weekend was the roast of tom brady great which i heard was great it was so funny so funny and by the way everyone was really funny uh tony from kill tony killed and burt kreischler and tom segura killed and the the roast master general himself he was great but i tell you who absolutely murdered and it was nikki glazer who i love what i've been reading yeah and she's a dear friend we see nikki at like every event and obviously she does uh fuckboy island with alan who i'm close with and so i've loved her forever.

And I feel like her comedy has never been truly appreciated. But like she absolutely destroyed in this roast. It was so good. That's amazing. So anyways. So wait, was she the, who was the, was there like a host? Kevin Hart. Because Kevin Hart doesn't say no to anything.

You know? Right, right, right. Which is like a joke that everyone makes. He's like Snoop Dogg. Yeah, exactly. There was a couple weird moments, but whatever. It's very, very funny. But the best and most cringy moment was, for some reason, Kim Kardashian and Tom are friends.

Okay. Or like there was like a rumor that they dated or something. Who the fuck knows, you know? Okay. And so she was chosen to give a toast to you know like whatever in the beginning and she gets up there and the entire crowd starts booing her so much so that she has to stop and she's like come on guys and so much so that kevin hart of whom she's about to make a joke about like she's like kevin hart you're so short and everyone

who starts booing and kevin hart has to be like hey everyone calm down calm down calm down don't boo and you could see on her face the you could see her little blonde head with a pop off and that's insane you know i'd be so embarrassed oh you know she went backstage and cried yeah you know she did was it just like a random live audience of people booing her at the staples center oh okay yeah so probably like randoms right anybody can buy a ticket kind of thing yeah i mean i think they had their famous people in the audience in the front and then yeah i think anyone could buy but yeah anyway so taylor swift has just destroyed kim kardashian and i can't say that i'm angry about it, but that's why I asked you

if you think that she's got the nuts to now go to the Met Gala after something like that. I think she does. Yeah. Yeah. Because if she doesn't go, then it's like...

That says a lot. Yeah, you've really gotten to me. And the Met is just not something you skip. Have you ever been? No, my gosh. I'll probably never get to go, but. Yeah. Super cool. Sarah's been, yeah? I don't think so. She gets invited to like the after

party and the after after party and the after after after party. But maybe now. She's such a fashion girly. That shocks me. I know. But maybe now that she's going to be living in New York. Mm-hmm. Because the Met's in New York, right? Yeah. At the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art. That's the one. That's the

place. Yeah, I'm excited to see the looks. Yeah, me too. Me too. But anyways, yeah, so Taylor Swift seemed to have absolutely destroyed Kim Kardashian, which I think is hilarious, but nowhere near the damage that Kendrick Lamar has done to Drake.

This I also don't understand. Okay. I don't really either because I don't really listen to a lot of hip hop. I found a clip of a woman who's kind of explaining it to everybody. And so for those of you that don't know, Kendrick Lamar and Drake are in a rap battle beef and they're putting out diss tracks at one another. Which I actually love this narrative. My favorite thing about this is it's two grown men writing poetry about one another, which is so beautiful. I found a TikTok of this woman who's kind of explaining it because I don't really understand.

I don't really listen to, I know that Kendrick Lamar is very, very good. I understand that he's like one of the best lyricists that we have out there right now. I heard Eminem say that once. I was like, okay, well, if he said it, that's probably's probably true yeah and and drake you know he was like an actor he was on derossi right and like the grassy whatever and he played a guy in a wheelchair he's more like a pop artist but the other thing is and this is a thing that has been following him around for a while is that he befriends a lot of underaged women like the millie bobby brown thing they became friends when she was like very young on, and whatever, who knows if that's weird or not,

but it's kind of weird. So that's the ammo that Kendrick has against Drake. Okay. I'll play this clip of this woman kind of explaining it, which I think is great. Okay. Educate me. The way this all started was so simple. Drake makes a song with j cole where cole is like oh me drake and kendrick

lamar we're the big three kendrick then goes on a future song where he's like fuck the big three it's just big me nigga it's just shocking because they're probably expecting this pushback thinking oh we gotta do something about this cole you gotta fight back and j cole's like yeah we do and releases his own little diss track called seven minute drill you fell off like the simpsons your first shit was classic your last shit was tragic one fish two fish red fish blue fish etc rick is gassing him up like the dr sue stan he is glad that his brother got his back a few days later j cole apologizes to kendrick saying i was just in a silly goofy mood my bad kendrick is still one of the greatest i do

like that j cole was smart enough to be like uh i'm out everyone was mocking j cole for backing out so quick if there's one thing you can say about drake like he put on his little suit and tie his nice little work shoes and he got his briefcase because he was standing on business comes out with two songs the first one is push-ups let's go band for band extortion you got small feet ha ha ha second song is actually redacted because drake thought it was a good idea to use an AI generated voice for Tupac and Snoop Dogg and so Tupac's estate sent him a cease and desist and there was that. and then Kendrick responds to Drake in euphoria

pathetic master manipulator, cutthroat business, got shit twisted, what is it the price? we ain't gotta get personal, this a friendly fade. but then goes full elmo talking to zoe about rocco i hate the way that you walk i hate the way that you talk i hate the way that you dress we hate the bitches you fuck because they confuse themselves with real women let your core audience stomach that and then tell them where you get your abs from i even hate when you say the words but that's just me i guess i can't just keep saying every single line but you get the point like it was miles above push-ups then kendrick dropped another one 616

in la again a banger anyway drake finally puts out his response called family matters starts off by saying the n-word which honestly was literally the only thing he could have done so i mean let's go you mentioned my seed now go deal with his dad he said cole losing sleep on this it ain't me which honestly i believe i believe jermaine released his little shell silverstein poem and then immediately realized he did not want the smoke backtracked he apologized and people were giving him shit for not standing on business but i think we all realize now like that was the smartest decision you could have ever made, J. Cole. At this point, Drake might be feeling the heat a little bit, but he's not on fire completely.

Yet. Mr. Aubrey alleges that Kendrick is beating on his girl, talks about his kids a little bit more, says, this shit gotta be over now for anyone out here that's calling it, right? Wrong. Meet the the grams is brutal that's literally the only way i can describe it brutal okay that was a lot and can't be real and that was a part one from what i understand what i'm gathering here is that kendrick lamar is on a different level of shit talking than dra is. And I feel like he's just getting roasted. Drake is. But one of my favorite things that Kendrick Lamar has done. So he's doing this whole thing about like basically saying that he's a pedophile, that Drake's a pedophile,

and he's dating younger women. And then he has this one line, which is, it's so great. And he's like something about the chords, like your favorite chords, A minor, which is so great because he's talking about younger people, which is a minor. And then he's talking about the musicality of it, which is A minor. And the whole song is in A minor. But the genius that I was told about from my buddy, Dan, who's a piano player, is that A minor is the one chord that uses no black notes on the piano. And that was like, I was just like, this guy's on a different, this guy's playing fucking chess and Drake's playing Jenga.

He's not even playing checkers. He's playing a different game. So anyways. I'm still confused about why Future would participate in a diss track about Drake because they're besties. I don't know. They've done so much music together. They put out a whole album together. It was one of my favorite albums of all time.

Yeah. I just want to go on the record and say to Kendrick Lamar, I'm sorry if I ever did anything to you. I didn't mean it. I know we've never met, so I don't think that could be a possibility, but I just want you to know that I am eternally sorry for anything that I could have done,

or maybe like in a dream that I did something wrong to you. I apologize. I don't want that smoke. Stay away. You're great. Okay. Good. I do love a good beef though.

Yeah, same. Very entertaining. Although that was a lot. It was a lot. And that was a part one. We're not even into part two. I know. Yeah.

I think I need to investigate more. You do. You should be the pop music investigator on this show. Not me. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. I'll do the indie stuff. You need to do pop and country. Let me tell you, if we want to stay on the TikTok train here, about the new song of the summer. Have you heard it? What is it? I don't know that it has a name let's call it finance does that ring a bell oh yeah i started to show up so i roasted that girl why that's the girl that was that was let's get into it oh yeah she's fucking genius because my entire tiktok feed is that size, a different remix of that song. Six, five finance.

It's so fun. For a man in finance. Six, five trust fund finance. It's genius. It's so catchy. It is all over my TikTok feed. Loud luxury literally played it last night in their DJ set. Like it's going to be, it's a banger.

You know how that thing they do on TikTok where like someone's like, Hey, I got a chord progression. Like do your thing, TikTok. And then like, hey, I got a chord progression. Do your thing, TikTok. And then a bassist comes in, a drummer comes in. All of a sudden, you have this whole song. Oh, yeah. That's what she's done.

She was like, I have this idea. It's genius. Yeah. I'm her biggest fan. Looking for a man in finance. Six five. Trust fund. Same, girls. The reason why all you guys like it is because you want that too

you know i'm not a big blue eye girly but um the rest of it yes what is your type i don't know okay well you said you're not a blue eye girly so you like brown eyes yeah i like brown eyes facial hair yeah tall i like bigger like big guys in just in general, like bigger guys. Barely. Just like can throw me around a little bit, you know, go chop a tree down outside kind of vibes. So like 6'5", bearded. Yeah, like 6'5". Bearded, outdoorsy.

Yeah. I'm looking for a bearded man in finance. Has a ranch. 6'5", Montana. Has a ranch. Six five, Montana. Loves dogs. Can throw me around. Okay. Did you watch the Kentucky Derbs?

Sort of. Are you, do you hate that? Do you like it? I mean, you, you race horses. I do not race horses. No, it's not what I do at all. Yeah, you do. It's timed.

Yeah, but you're not racing other horses in a pack like that. You're still racing. There's a lot. I'm not racing, though. No, not. I thought it's about how fast you do it. The second round, if you make it, is about how fast you do it. The first round is not.

That's a race. No, it's not. I really almost don't want to speak on it because I literally said yesterday I like need to do some research on it. Because the thing I don't love about it is it appears that the horses get hurt a lot. And when you're watching a race, it appears that every jockey has got a big whip, a stick, a whip. And it appears like they're hitting them a lot. Now, I watched like the slow-mo zoomed in clip clip of the three horses that were right at the photo finish. Great ending, by the way.

Great ending. Loved it. And when you watch it in slow-mo, there's one jockey on the middle horse that does hit his horse with the stick. You can see it make contact. And then the rest of the time, he's just waving it in front of his eye. So it looks like he was only hit once. Here's my thing about horse racing is like, I know they do a really good job of, of making it so that you can't drug the horses. Like they do a lot of drug testing and there is a lot of protocol about that, which is great, but I don't love the use of whips, but like in, in my sport and what I do, there's a rule.

If you can carry a whip and you can hit a horse twice, but you, if you hit it more than twice consecutively, or if you hit, if you hit it for a reason, the judge deems like inappropriate, not only will they eliminate you from the class, I'll suspend you from the sport, which I think is great. Like it's very strict. So I would just be curious to know, like, do they have the same rules? Because it looks like they use whips a lot and i just don't like that but i could be wrong after seeing that slow-mo video i was like you know what maybe they do have those rules and maybe they can only hit it once and the rest they're just kind of swinging it around and that's fine but yeah i just i'm not that knowledgeable about it you know yeah i can't say that like i think it's a great sport i went to the kentucky debris once and i thought it was such a letdown first of all mint julep just sugar rum water no thank you and then it's like you know it's three

minutes of like excitement then it's over and you're like what the fuck was that and also like where you sit you're like you only get to see like a little small it was much better watching it on tv well it's kind of like f1 you don't get to see much yeah in the past when they when a horse does go down and they have to euthanize it on the track. No, thank you. Don't need that. That's what I'm saying. Like, too many horses are getting hurt and having to be put down.

But here's my question. We were asking this. I clocked it to ask you. Do you think those horses... Okay, so I used to duck hunt a lot as a kid and stuff. And so we had a duck dog, you know, a dog that, like, went out and got the ducks a kid and stuff. And so we had a duck dog, you know, and we, a dog that like went out and got the ducks for us and whatever. And that dog loved his job. He was like, or like a,

you have herding dog. Like those dogs love to do that. Do race horses love to race? Like they're like, fuck yes, let's go. Let's go. I think, yes. I think there's always an exception, right? Like not every horse is going to love it, but they are bred for that. I do think they're bred to run. I think a lot of them do love it. The only problem I have with it is they start them so young. Those horses that are running are like, what, two years old? The horse's bones are not done growing by two.

Like we don't sit on it. We don't sit on our horses until they're four because we want them to be like fully formed before we start putting weight on them and put stress on their ligaments and tendons and stuff. And so like that's the problem with racing is they start them so young and they race them so young that by the time the horse is five or six, which really should be its prime, it's kind of done. So then why don't so why do they race them so young? I don't know. There's got to be a reason for it because there is like you have to race in this window if you want to do like the triple crown and stuff well yeah because there's an age there's age limits on it i'm pretty sure so yeah it's just like i said i'm not as knowledgeable as i should be to talk about it but that's just things that don't really sit great with me is running a two-year-old like that and stuff and it just seems like a lot of wear and tear on an animal that's not really like fully formed. And it just seems crazy. But, you know, like I said, I should do some research.

But if you win the Kentucky Derby, then you get to go and just be a stud and just have sex. Then you get treated like a king. So maybe it's worth it. I don't know. It's kind of like being in the NFL. You could get CTE and like lose your mind. But you could also get millions of dollars. True.

Yeah. I will say it does seem like the horses are really like taken care of really well. You know, it's like our horses. Like they treat them like athletes. I'm sure they get all the things. Well, it's a big investment, I'm sure. Yeah, exactly. So, you know, I do think they're treated well, but it's just the racing itself.

I'm not quite sure I'm on board with. But like somebody in horse racing could probably look at show jumping and say the same thing. Like, oh, God, those horses shouldn't be jumping jumps like that and hitting rails and blah, blah, blah. I'm like, there's an argument for everything. Yeah. Well, it was an exciting finish. It was a photo finish and it was like number three by nose. I know.

Loved it. Very cool. So, yeah, I watched it. Yeah, that happened. F1. Did you pay any attention? No. Tell. Loved it. Very cool. So yeah, I watched it. Yeah, that happened. F1. Did you pay any attention to F1? No, tell me all about it. Lando Norris won his very first race. And he's been doing this for a while. I think they said he's raced 110

races. He drives for McLaren. He's like one of the younger guys. And I just like was like tearing up for him. It was just so freaking cute. He was so happy to win a race. And I'm just so glad Max didn't win a race. Lando Norris sounds like Yo Lando.

Yo little Lando. Lando Norris. That sounds like a name in like a Star Wars movie. I guess it's Lando Calrippian but still Lando Norris is pretty close. I've been seeing that Gatorade is now making water.

Ew. Have you seen that? No, but they need to not do that. But also, Gatorade, your whole thing was that water wasn't good enough. That we needed electrolytes and we needed fucking red food coloring dye number seven. Are you telling

me now, Gatorade, after all these years that water was just fine? That we didn't need your bullshit sugar water? Why is everyone trying to do water? And you know what? It's the one thing that's fucking free everywhere. I know. I don't get it.

Can we not? Can we just relax? All you got to do is get a good water filtration system at your sink. That's all I do. All you got to do is get a good water filtration system at your sink. True. That's all I do. And then I drink out of this Yeti all day long. Yeah. But we do drink way much more water than we did back in like the 90s.

I know. Do you think it's really helping us or not? I don't think so at all, actually. I don't either. We're probably just pissing it out. I don't think. And like a lot of times, like I'll go and get, you know, like sometimes I'll go get like a lymphatic drainage massage. Do you believe in that stuff?

Yeah, I do. Actually, I really do on the lymphatic stuff. But anyway, like I got a facial last week and she was like, you need to drink more water. You're just so dehydrated. And I had literally just drank a gallon and a half of water. Yeah. So I just think it's all bullshit. I know.

I've had moments when like people put makeup on me, you know, for like whatever they're like wow the lotion's really absorbing quick you are very dehydrated and i'm like what the fuck are you talking about my skin is absorbing it so that's how you know i'm dehydrated i know but anyway but i'm like i don't know like i've i drink a lot of water for like an average person i think and yeah more times than not someone's telling me I'm dehydrated. I'm like, I don't know what to tell you. I'm drinking my, my frigging body weight and water here. Yeah. I have a bone to pick real quick before we get into some favorite things. Okay. And my bone to pick really, I think I want to just focus in on streaming services in general. Okay. You know, I remember I'm so old that I remember when we just had cable. Okay. And it got expensive and we got annoyed by it. And then all of a sudden Netflix came around and said, you know what,

we're going to do this streaming thing. Great. And then this whole movement came about that we were going to quote unquote, cut the cable. Do you remember that everyone was cutting the cable and we were getting rid of that. And then we were just going to have a couple of streaming services and that's how we were going to do it. Okay. But then it was like, well, we can't really do that because you still want to watch live TV. You still want to watch sports. So you kind of need some cable, but I'm still gonna get my Netflix. And then all of a sudden Hulu comes along and then all of a sudden Disney plus comes along. And then all of a sudden Peacock and Prime and Showtime and HBO, everyone's got a streaming service. And all of a sudden I have so much more shit than I ever needed

and I'm paying so much more than I ever was when I just had cable. Oh, and the other thing, because there is no commercial advertising revenue coming in. The people that are making these streaming services don't have enough money because they're only getting money from the consumer for the paid subscription. So we're getting less shit for more money and we still haven't gotten able to cut the cable. And here's my gripe with the whole thing. And this is one big thing that i saw happen recently and hey i'm employed by this company but i saw that disney plus and hulu are merging together and they are going to now start doing a novel idea which is live fucking television we've come all the way back around to live television that they are going to have and And here's my thing. And I think we should all, we need some sort of cool slogan like we had before of the cut the cable, which is re-attach the cable. Okay. This is what I want. I want us to all go back to, we've got Comcast

or DirecTV or Spectrum. I just want those. We get those, the choices. And you know what? We all have DVRs so we can fucking skip commercials if we want to. And I want to go back to watching TV with commercials. I want to stop paying so much for everything. And on the other side of it, as someone who like likes to go make TV shows, no one can fucking make a TV show because there is no budget because no one's selling advertising anymore on these things because they're fucking streaming services. So not only are you getting less shit,

but you're paying more. We're all getting fucked. Hollywood's in shambles. I'm over here fucking trying to make ads on TikTok. It's, i'm angry i've never heard you actually yell like this on the podcast but don't you agree yeah you're not wrong i don't love the the what did you call it the stupid box for the dvr i don't i don't like love that but well you don't even need it anymore like Yeah, I guess not. There's a DirecTV app. Yeah, I have that.

Yeah. You could just have the app. And so what happened was Netflix fucked this all up, okay? So what Netflix said was like, okay, we are a distribution network. We are going to buy other people's stuff that really no one's using right now, and we're going to put it on the platform, right? that really no one's using right now. And we're going to put it on the platform, right? And then Disney, Hulu, Prime, everyone said, wait, hold on a second. We spent a lot of money on that. We're going to go start our own streaming service. So then Netflix had nothing to buy for us to be able to watch. So then they became a production company. So then they started having to make shit. Now

they were able to use the money that we were paying them to be able to fund these projects, but that's not a whole lot of money to have an entire platform. If you're making, you know, million dollar box office films, rebel moon and stuff, and then also trying to make TV shows, there's, there is no, there's not enough money to make a bunch of stuff because you don't have ads baked in true and so once that happened and everyone was like i'm not gonna fucking sell you shit anymore netflix then netflix was like well we got to go make some shit and the shit that they were were making one it's not a whole lot and it's not as good as the traditional production houses, 20th Century Fox and the Warner Brothers and all of them who've been doing this forever.

My thing is, is this, is it was always on the advertisers to be able to fund the great content. And it doesn't exist anymore because they're asking the consumer to fund it. I think that we're just not getting as good shit anymore because there's not enough money. This isn't just me.

Like every time you talk to anyone in the industry, they're like the budge, everyone's budget's been cut. It's because there's no, no one's selling ads. Right. I figured it out. Everyone, we just need to go back. Just go back to it. Yeah. I'm down. This is the other thing we were talking about this. How many sitcoms are on TV right now? How many really funny TV shows are on right now? I don't know. It's like the George Lopez show. I know you don't, but like the George Lopez show. Is that still on cable?

Yeah, that's on NBC. Okay. And Peacock. There's like the one where it's like, it's called Ghosts, where it's like someone who can like see the ghost in the house they live in, you know? Okay. The Friends, the Seinfelds, the will and graces the wings we used to have all this funny shit no one makes funny shit anymore no i think another reason nobody makes funny shit is because people it's hard it's becoming harder to be funny because everybody gets

so fucking offended they can't do anything anymore yeah you know jerry seinfeld made that made that statement recently about like he would never be able to make the show that he made back in the 90s. And I'm not sure if that's really true because Larry David just did that. He just made that show. He gets away with it because it's Larry David, but I don't know. I've come to the realization that I think we all need to go back to what we originally were doing, which was you paid for cable and you had the four networks that were free because they were all ad heavy. And it used

to be that universal owned whatever. And they made the majority of their money on, you know, their main channel, their main network thing. But then that also allowed them to be able to like go and do like Nat Geo or discovery or like HGTV, like all this other stuff that the audiences weren't as large, but it was niche for some people, which was cool. And so then you would pay a little bit more to be able to get that in your cable package. Right. And now effectively we are paying so much more for so much less.

And I think that that's, I know. And a lot of people are hurting, like not even, not even like actors or like reality TV people, but like crew not even, not even like actors or like reality TV people, but like crew lighting art department. This whole entire town is built upon like everyone working and making shit. No one's making it anymore. It's just, I know.

Okay. I'll stop that. Okay. You have some faith things, bro. Yeah, bro. Oh,

you want me to go first? I just went on like a 45 minute rant. Okay. So I'm obsessed with Under the Bridge. Told you. I know, you did. I'm upset. Are you caught up? Are you caught up though?

Yeah, I'm fucking caught up. Most recent episode, I did not like. Really? Why not? Because the girl accuses the nice dad of being a pedo. I know. Is the dad, like,

is the dad nice? I feel like now that we're seeing his backstory that maybe he's not so nice. I can't, I don't know yet. I can't decide yet. I don't know. He seems so sweet when all the girls come over. He does,

but he's also just like dumb as shit. Like, why are we going in on this girl that you don't know? Like it's a, it was a little much. I know, but you know, it was sad though.

I mean, wrongly accused. I don't, I never liked that for sure yeah i love the show i love riley keough so much she's so good um and honestly lily gladstone too like they're both just so good what a twist i guess spoiler alert if you guys aren't caught up maybe like fast forward 30 seconds what a twist that now this other girl is like yeah i did it i don't even know that girl's name what's her name look at what took the shoes yeah i know like what i know the show's good it's really really good i told you i was like

it reminds me a little bit it's way better but it reminds me a little bit of cruel summer i didn't watch that you did it season one was really good it just reminds me of true detective yeah it's like a mix of those it's like gritty and fucked up and you don't really know where it's going and it's just really good acting and good writing yeah i love it um but like i'm upset i can't just watch it all you know i know frustrating have you seen what's the new anne hathaway movie called the idea of you the idea of you do you know about this movie no you don't no why would i know about an anne hathaway film everyone's talking about it are they literally everyone it's the talk of the town is it yeah especially my tiktok okay this was a book like a fan fiction book that everyone women are obsessed

with that they've turned into a movie um it is so fucking good now i need to go back and read the book because i've never read it but basically the premise is anna hathaway plays a 40 year old mom a hot mom but a mom and takes her daughter to go see basically the equivalent of one direction like a boy band at coachella gets them backstage passes or whatever meets and then like inadvertently meets one of the boys in the band and they fall in love and they have a relationship and it is steamy and it was such a good movie i'm obsessed with the guy nick galatzine i think is his name the guy that plays the boy his acting is incredible their on-screen chemistry in freaking credible this movie is so good yeah it was written and directed

by michael showalter who was in like wet hot american summer and the state and stuff really funny guy is it shades of like olivia wilde and uh yeah that's what everyone's saying yeah literally everyone's like so they wrote a book about olivia wilde the hairstyles like but it which is crazy because like yeah you know what's her name celine celine yeah how old is olivia wild yeah, you know. What's her name? Celine? Celine, yeah. How old is Olivia Wilde? Do you know? She's not 40, is she?

I was thinking she was like my age. Yeah, maybe. Far from that. Fuck. But. Celine, a 40-year-old single mom, begins an unexpected romance with a 24-year-old Hayes Campbell, the lead singer of August Moon, the hottest boy band on the planet. It's the idea of you boy band on the planet.

The idea of you streaming now on Prime Video. Let's look up a lady. I mean, like, I'm not going to watch it. I'm not. But like, I do like what's happening there. It's amazing. Wow. Seriously.

So she's my age. She's well, she's 40 now. She is 40. Yeah. So she was a little younger when she dated Harry. Also, Harry, I think, is 40. Yeah. So she was a little younger when she dated Harry. Also, Harry, I think, is older. The boy in this movie, he plays a 24-year-old, which is 24 and 40. That's a big gap.

I mean, big gap. And what's crazy is in the movie, Anne has a daughter who's probably 15, I'd say. I don't think I ever see her drive. So let's say 15. That was the only casting I didn't love. Not because the girl wasn't a good actress, but because I thought, let's say 15. Yeah. That was the only casting I didn't love. Not because the girl wasn't a good actress, but because I thought she looked older than 15. Like I think they could have maybe made her look a little bit younger. It's just so crazy to think like you're with a guy that's closer to your daughter's age. Yeah. Well, divorcee men do it all the time. So true.

That one hit close to home, I think. That one hit close to home, I think. I'm keeping it in. Too good of a joke. Okay. We watched the Dance Moms reunion. Oh, no. Why?

Holy flying fuck balls. I'm sorry, but it is so sad. I'm sorry. It's so sad. It's so nice to see these girls grown up, and a lot of them have been able to grow into these beautiful women, but it's this whole retrospective looking back. And the whole time I'm sitting there with Sarah being like, this is so fucked up. And she's like, what do you mean? And I'm like, this is nothing, nothing but sexualizing very, very little girls on TV, no less. And not, not even that the putting them in like little bikinis and like having them do splits and stuff, which is just like off the bat, like a lot of weird guys. I bet you were watching this for like that. But the other thing that like makes it worse

is the degradation of the little girls in those costumes, which is like a whole nother level of fucked up, treating these overly sexualized young girls like garbage. And that woman, Abby Lee Miller, is I think the devil incarnate. She is such a horrible person. I always hated her. But when I watched the show, I was like, I was always just like, this is a bonkers thing that this is a real thing where it's like these moms are just yelling at this fat lady in a wheelchair for yelling at their kids. And like, it's just like so much. Um, but now you watch it back and you're like,

she was calling the cops on people constantly. And she was such a bitch to everyone. And then call the cops and play the victim card. And you're like, you fucking piece of garbage over here, lady. Anyways, you got to watch it. Jojo Siwa is there. She has drunk the Kool-Aid of Abby Lee Miller because obviously that woman made her who she is today.

Anyways, it's amazing though. Gotta go watch it. Gotta watch it. Okay. But it is very gross. Yeah. I'm amazed that that show, like you said earlier, you're like, you could never make that show. Sometimes you shouldn't have made that show. Like you said earlier, you're like, you could never make that show. Sometimes you shouldn't have made that show.

I know. Like that show and Pregnant Teenagers. It was on MTV. Oh, yeah. That should not be a show. Teen Mom. Teen Mom. What a terrible premise.

Aggrandizing and glorifying teenagers for getting pregnant. You're very right. When I hear myself, I realize I'm the old guy now. Yes, you are. I'm erotic grandpa. I hope Rosara's sick, you're not. Speaking of,

Sarah? I told the, no, erotic grandpa. I told the Y of tears that, before I called you, that erotic grandpa. Damn it. I told the Y of tears before I called you. No. That erotic grandpa was going to be making a return. And I've been thinking about this for a while. Because a lot of people do miss erotic grandpa. Maybe like two or three.

That might be 40% of our listenership. I don't know at this point. True. But, you know, i told you about this movie or about this book by rebecca yaros fourth wing and then iron flame is the newest one now we're we're all patiently awaiting the third installment of fourth wing and i told you how i thought it was a ya novel and then all of a sudden became very very, very sexualized, and I was like, this is not a YA novel. This is very, very sexual. And I thought it might be funny if erotic grandpa reads some excerpts from Fourth Wing.

You're going to take out the... Go right ahead. All right. Well, this is for the YFTers out there. I like that you can't hear this. I can't hear you. I don't know what you're saying. All right. Well can't hear you. I don't know what you're saying. All right.

Well, hello, everybody. I've missed you greatly. And now for an excerpt from Rebecca Yarros' famous kind of YA novel, Fourth Wing. This happens in chapter 30, page 376. He glides the fabric of my underwear across my clit, and my back arches at the burst of pleasure that radiates through my body. So sweet, I can taste it. He captures my mouth with his again, and in a hungry assault,

his tongue sliding against mine as his fingers stroke me through the fabric, expertly using it for friction. I try to rock my hips against his hand for more, but my feet dangle off the desk, robbing me of leverage. I can only have what he decides to give. Touch me, I demand, my fingernails biting into the back of his strong neck. Desire pounding through me like a drumbeat. His ragged voice against my mouth. If I get my hands on you, really honestly get my hands on you, I don't

know if I'll be able to stop. And that's been an excerpt of Rebecca Yaros' Fourth Wing, read by Erotic Grandpa. I have another excerpt that I'm going to do next week, unless we get a lot of complaints about that on

the reviews. You can come back in now, Brandy. That was long. It was erotic. I don't think so. You should have listened to it purely to be like, maybe I should read this book.

I'm going to read the, whatever, Hannah Hathaway one first. Okay. The Idea of You. The Idea of You The Idea of You well maybe just maybe I'll buy that book too and erotic grandpa will read an excerpt from that which I think would be great

don't run it for me speaking of books did you see that Dark Matter is finally coming out on Apple Plus oh is it? Yes. Thank God. It has been so long. Did you ever read The Martian? I don't think I ever read it. Love the movie.

The movie's great, right? With Matt Damon. That author wrote another book called, I think, Project Hail Mary and they're making, and I love that book. I told the YF2ers about it. It was years ago. Anyways, they're making that new movie and I'm, Project Hail Mary. And they're making, and I love that book. I told the YF2 years about it. It was years ago. Anyways, they're making that new movie,

and I'm very excited about that. And I think that Ryan Reynolds is playing it. Because Hollywood only hires like four people at this point, I think. Oh, I had a question for you. Okay. I saw this on TikTok, and I thought it was so interesting. So this is about the difference between charm and charisma. I had never thought of it that way.

I wanted to know, after you hear this, what you think you are and what you think I am. Okay. You've got charm or charisma. It's one or the other. So charm is I come to you. Obama is very, very charming. Charisma is you come to me. Trump is very charismatic.

Whatever side of the political line is very charismatic. Jennifer Aniston is incredibly charming. Angelina Jolie is incredibly charismatic. You both get to have sex with Brad Pitt. Don't worry about a thing, ladies. You're one or the other, but knowing what you are on stage is very valuable, I think. Charm isn't people like you. It's they think you would like them. I have virtually no charm. I've got a lot of charisma, but knowing what you are is really, really interesting. I'd never heard of it put that way, but I think it's pretty interesting. So he said, charm is when they come to you. Yeah. Exactly. Charm is you come to them. It's the ability that everyone likes you. Okay. Charisma is that they come to you. That people are just drawn to you.

Oh, interesting. You're charismatic. What do you think I am? I think charismatic. Really? Yeah. Interesting. You don't?

So I sent this to Sarah and I was like, I think they're both good qualities. And I said, what do you think I am? And what do you think you are? You don't? So I sent this to Sarah and I was like, I think they're both good qualities. And I said, what do you think I am? And what do you think you are? And she goes, you first. I think this is a trap. And I said, I think I'm charming and I think you're charismatic. And she was like, that's exactly what I agree with.

I think you both are charismatic. Really? I do. What do you think you are? Charm. Do you not? I don't know. Because you are such an onstage personality now.

Yeah. No, I do not think you're charming. I think that you're charismatic. I don't think so. You don't try to get people to like you. I do. No, people just do like me. That's charisma.

That's not charm. I stand by what I said. I think charismatic people, like, I feel like if I walk into a room people don't just come up to me People aren't just drawn to me and come up to me and want to start talking to me But when I do start talking to people I win everybody over. Yeah, everybody gets along with me You know what? I mean But it's like that to me like charm to me is almost like a little bit a little bit Manipulative in a way like when you can charm people to me that can be very

like i'm a bitch sometimes but people that don't know me very well would not think that yeah you know what i mean that's kind of what i think charismatic it to me is like miley so charismatic that's what that's what kind of where i was going i was like what do you think your sister is oh definitely charismatic and i wonder though like i wonder do you think she was always like that or do you think because you become such a level of no came out of the womb that way yeah she was just like i don't give a fuck like me don't don't give a shit i'm just me yeah yeah interesting fascinating i saw this other thing and i don't even know if it's satire or not but uh it's amazing I hope it's real I really do so this is about a girl who um wants everyone to go uh to the bathroom outdoors she says I require

all my guests to use the bathroom outside hi my name is ivy bloom and this is my outdoor potty area of course I used to let my friends use the bathroom in my house, but I've since learned how unsanitary that is. What? Before entering the potty area, I require guests to put on these foot covers, and first-timers are required to read the rules. The most important rule is to dig at least six inches from an existing stick, because that's where another guest has dug a hole. It's pretty simple. You just dig a hole, do what you have to do, and put your toilet paper on top.

I provide seeds that must be placed inside to keep my garden growing. And once that's placed inside, you cover it up with the dirt you dug up, and then place some leaves on top. What's the point of the toilet paper? The last thing you have to do is mark the spot with one of these sticks. I do live in Arizona, and it gets really hot. So I provide a bucket with refreshments and snacks that visitors can snack on while using the bathroom. There's yogurt in there.

There is a privacy curtain. Once that's done, they can take the covers off their feet and wash them in this bucket. Then they have to place them in this jar so that the next guest can use them. Once my guest is done using the bathroom, I require them to sign this journal. And I do respectfully ask for tips because maintaining this area can get a little expensive. It's definitely not real. I think it might be though no she does she does not leave yogurt in a box outside for people to eat and also in arizona like that's definitely gonna go bad really quickly she's definitely not doing that requiring tips that was the giveaway to go take a shit and dig a cat hole in your

backyard also why would you put toilet paper in the ground? Because it's biodegradable. Is it? Okay, if you take a shit outside, are you not using toilet paper? No, you are, but you put it in a plastic baggie when you're hiking and camping and then you toss it. No, that's biodegradable. No, I don't think. It is. Some wipes say they are, but I don't know.

I'm not saying wipes. I thought it was toilet paper. No, I know. Some wipes, though, like good wipes, those are biodegradable. Yeah, so they say. So they say, yeah. But yeah, I don't believe it. I'm not buying wipes. That was toilet paper. No, I know. Some wipes, though, like good wipes, those are biodegradable. Yeah, so they say. So they say, yeah. But yeah, I don't believe it. I'm not buying it either. Anyways, I want to go shit in that girl's bathroom. Why?

I do not. I can't even pee outside. I get anxiety about it. No, no, no, no. I want to shit in her actual bathroom. Oh, in her actual bathroom. And I want to be like, I shit in your bathroom. Oh, but honestly.

What the fuck is happening here? We haven't used that in a hot minute. We haven't. Oh, man, that's so funny, though. It was. Wow. Yeah. I have a bunch of music.

Oh, good. You want to hear some tunage? Love to. Have you heard of the Red Clay Strays? No, I have not. They're awesome it's an old school vibe almost like pokey laforge but then also like kind of in the vein of like elvis but i feel like a little more country this is a song called wonder why which is like they're kind of like

their popular one wondering why excuse me me. Like the quiver in the voice, like all this. The Red Clay Strays has a song called Wondering Why off a record called Moment of Truth. What did you think? I like it. Do you? Yeah. I'd you think? I like it. Do you? Yeah. I thought you would. I gotta say,

I do think that, I don't know what you want to call it, like Outlaw Country or Americana is like the best place it's ever been right now. Like there's so much good stuff. Remember Matt Carney? Of course.

He got a new song out called Drowning in Nostalgia that I was like, Matt? I used to know him back in Nashville. I don't even know if he lives there anymore.

But this is, he does? I don't know. I don't know if he does. Anyways I don't even know if he lives there anymore. But this is... He does? I don't know. I don't know if he does. Anyways, here's Drowning in Nostalgia. I'm free, darling Like a feeling in my dreams It's all that I see

Falling When I can't go to sleep Feels like I'm drowning In nostalgia And I just want to breathe. I want to be free, darling, like I feel in my dreams. That's Matt Carney drowning in nostalgia. He just put that out.

I think I follow him on TikTok and he put out a song because that's how like everyone is now releasing music to people. I know. And I really like that one. This is a guy that has been absolutely destroying on TikTok that I do like a lot. It's a very interesting sound. I think he goes by MKG. Anyways, this is Are You Looking Up.

I'm interested to see what you think about this. I don't know. It's something about it. I really like it. MKG, are you looking up thoughts? It's fine. It's got this kind of like early 90s vibe to it. Good guitar playing. Anyways.

That's fine. Okay, fine. Well, I think it's great. It's fine. I think it's great. I think it's great. I think I have one more, unless you've got anything. No, go for it.

All right. You want to go out on it? Sure. This is Steven Wilson Jr. This is a song called Kid. What do you got coming up? Thursday, I'll be in Calgary, Alberta. Eh?

Alberta, Alberta. Canada, oh, Canada. I don't know if that's a song or not. That's our national anthem. Oh, great. Cute. I'm playing at a spot called Cowboys Dance Hall. Sounds like a great time, if our national anthem. Oh, great. Cute. I'm playing at a spot called Cowboys Dance Hall. Sounds like a great time

if you ask me. I'll be playing my country EDM set in Calgary on Thursday night. And then LA for like a day. LA? And then Vegas Sunday for a little pool party action at, you know it, Encore

Beach Club. It's a day show. That'll be fun. My mom might come because it's Mother's Day. Oh, fun. And so I was trying to talk her into that. And then I'm going back to LA for my mom's birthday. And then ACM Awards in Dallas. And then Hangout Festival.

And then EDC in Vegas. Wow. I got a nice little run ahead of me. You got a lot of stuff coming up. Lots. in Vegas. Wow. I got a little nice little run ahead of me. You got a lot of stuff coming up. Lots. I'm going out to Pinehurst,

number two in North Carolina, to help promote the US Open that's coming there in June. Man, you're just a big golf guy. I know. It's becoming like too much of like my identity and I don't love that. It really is. And then my 40th birthday is coming up, so that sucks fucking nutsacks.

That is fucking crazy. I know. What are you going to do? Right now, nothing. All my actual birthday. I'm going to Band of Dunes with my brother, Brett, and Dean, so that'll be fun. Okay. I'll be in Dallas, unfortunately. I was thinking. That's okay. Not that you want to hang out with me on your birthday. I do. Of course I do. But, you know, when I'm in town for my mom's birthday, hers is three days before yours, That's okay. Not that you want to hang out with me on your birthday. I do. Of course I do. But, you know, when I'm in town for my mom's birthday, hers is three days before yours. Yeah.

We could do a little, like, joint celebration. Get it? Oh, I got it, got it, got it. Well, she wants to come to the club. Why don't we go over there and I'll take her to lunch. Oh, that would be nice. That would be great. That work? Yeah.

Okay. Cute. Then I'm moving to New York for a while. So that's happening. Damn. Yeah. All right. Wife Tears, we love. So that's happening. Damn. Yeah. All right. Why have tears?

We love you. Love you guys. Okay, bye. Bye. This song's so fucking good. I almost want to start it again. Who is this? You know what?

I'm actually going to start it again because it's just so, the lyrics in this are just so good. This is Stephen Wilson Jr. Kid. Oh. Everyone listen. Listen to the lyrics. Okay. It's going to change your life. kid. Oh. Everyone listen. Listen to the lyrics. Okay. It's going to change your life.

Okay. And Steven, I'm going to play more than 30 seconds. Don't sue us, but that's how good this song is. Don't sue us. Carrying the weight of the world uphill Keep on running so you don't stand still

Ice cream melting on a red dirt racetrack Walking through the halls with a bulletproof backpack It's good. Damn. Yeah. Ain't old enough to buy your own cold beer Y'all ain't the ones that make the rules around here Eat your peas and say your prayers

Hush your mouth and brush your hair Who do you think you are, kid? Bare feet on a tar, kid Crashing daddy's car, kid Grow up fast like your mama did Teenage baby had a baby All them dreams turn into maybe Maybe he's now a healthy never forever young and young

forever ain't that the truth about the truth will put a world of hurt on you a broomstick poke and a bike spokes the jokes on you who are you trying to kill? Oh, so good. Really good. Who are you trying to kid to close it out that way? Oh, fuck. That's good writing. Do you like that one? Yeah.

I don't know. That one's tough. I know. Bulletproof backpack. It's like, oof. It's like a real thing, probably. All right. See ya.

On that note. Fuck. Come party in Vegasgas this weekend six five trust fund looking for a man in finance six five blue eyes trust fund this podcast has been brought to you by podcast nation