Your Favorite Thing with Wells & Brandi - Lordy lordy Wells is 40?!
Episode Date: May 15, 2024Wells is turning 40 so be prepared for even more old man rants. Your hosts decide 27 is the sweet spot before diving into their fave and least fave things. Wells also comes in hot with important and a...ccurate news he acquired from TikTok including a horrific new nail trend and more secrets of the Denver airport. Apparently, dodgeball is banned from schools and your hosts have some words to say on that. Wells is excited to tell everyone about his new self-tanner for men and Brandi is not excited to share her experience travelling on WestJet airlines.  Favorite things mentioned: Baby Reindeer Oppenheimer Dark Matter The Circle  John Mulaney Presents: Everybody’s in LA It’s One of Us Grand Cayman: Secrets in Paradise The Roast of Tom Brady The GOAT I Had Some Help by Post Malone feat. Morgan Wallen  Thanks to our awesome sponsors for supporting this episode!  Storyworth: Save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/yft! Boll & Branch: Get 15% off your order when you use promo code FAVORITE at bollandbranch.com. Exclusions apply. See site for details.   Don’t forget to rate, review, and follow Your Favorite Podcast! Plus, keep up with us between episodes on our Instagram pages, @yftpodcast @wellsadams and @brandicyrus and be sure to leave us a voicemail with your fave things at 858-630-1856!Â
Transcript
Discussion (0)
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Do it.
We are in the same room today.
This is happening a lot, I would just like to say.
Yeah. Well, because you're coming
to LA.
LA.
Bring the mic a little bit closer to you.
Like that?
Bring it, spin it towards you.
Like that? Yeah, perfect. That's very close.
Like I'm going to chip a tooth.
Okay, put it back then. Just a little.
Okay, do it.
And my teeth were very expensive.
They were.
I hope I never have to get veneers.
You have great teeth.
Do I?
Yeah, you really do.
They're very straight.
This one's a little-
They're very big.
This one's a little off kilter.
No, that's fine.
It's fine.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's good enough.
What are we doing here?
I think they look great.
Yeah.
I just paid you a compliment.
You should appreciate that. Thank you. I appreciate that. See, It's good enough. What are we doing here? I'm doing great. Yeah. I just paid you a compliment. You should appreciate that.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
See, I'm nice sometimes.
Do I look like I'm about to turn 40?
No, actually.
This is coming out the day before I turn 40.
This is the last day for Wells to be in his 30s.
It's whatever.
But you know, I was thinking about it, actually.
You've, I think, known me for 10 years now.
I think so.
And we've effectively been doing a show for 10 years now i think so or like and we've effectively
been doing us show for 10 years i think so because i think maybe 31 was when i met you
yeah i want to say it was 2016 no it was before that it was yes because when i lived in that
house where it's funny somebody sent me a video of like slip and slide kickball and was like, this looks so fun. And I was like, Hmm, it is fun. I've done it. When I lived in that house,
it was definitely at least 2015, if not the year before that I moved out.
It's going to be over 10 years. Man, do you have, do you have friends that you have
been friends with for over 10 years? How many?
Not that many, but I don't have that many friends in general. I don't either. Um, it's funny that time in my life that we met that those
couple of years is when I made all of my very best friends, I think. Oh really? Um, because I had just
come, came out of a breakup that year, like the year before I had broken up with somebody and
my friends were his friends. And you know how that is like when you're dating somebody and you just, everyone's friends become
each other's friends and whatnot. And so when we broke up, I kind of had to like rethink my
friend group and my cert, my social circle and whatnot. And to be honest, a lot of our friends
came to my side because obvi. Yeah. But yeah, I feel like that year is when I made a lot of those
friendships that I now to this day have and call some of my very best friends.
Like that was the same year I met Sam and his whole crew had become some such good friends of
mine. One of my very best friends is Adam Bobo. Shout out Bobo. He doesn't listen to this podcast,
but one of my besties, I met him in 2015 or 16. So like, yeah, that was just like a good
pivotal era of my life where I made some really great friends.
Yeah. So, I mean, you were what, 22 then?
No.
How old are you now?
36.
Okay.
So you're four years younger than me.
So you were 26.
Yeah.
26.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
27 really is the sweet spot.
It is a good spot.
It is.
Yeah.
You're,
uh,
you've got enough money cause you've been working to have fun,
but not too much where it's like a burden.
Oh God.
Who agrees?
Yeah.
Boo's only ever known luxury.
I know.
You know,
it must be freaking nice.
Yeah.
She came into this world with a rich mama and she's only ever known caviar and
coconuts.
Isn't that a saying? Caviar and coconuts isn't that a saying caviar and coconuts yeah i don't know i don't know either that sounds nice have you seen there's like some curator creator uh on
tiktok that went to the met gala and did like the let the meat cake thing and like everyone is and now they've started a like revolution to block and
unfollow celebrities oh have you seen this no oh it's a whole thing on tiktok yeah but it's just
on social media in general okay the whole maria antoinette thing of like let them eat cake is like
they were starving in the whatever and so her saying that yeah sure it's a little tone deaf or, but it's like all these creators are like, we're going to hit them where it hurts.
We're going to block.
So there's like, I've seen a TikTok where they're watching Kim Kardashian's following drop.
Okay.
But that's because of Taylor Swift.
No, but there's a whole list of people.
Taylor Swift's also on the list of block.
Oh.
And you know, I was thinking about in terms of this like obviously this is a very small
percentage of people that are really doing this so like whatever i think that people got had so
much fun canceling a lot of people that when they ran out of people to cancel they were like okay i
don't know let's let's cancel some more people just pick a random
influencer people just really enjoy being angry yeah they do they do and that's just that's a sad
thing i agree but i understand it too like you know i understand it in the fact of like you can
say that the economy is doing well but that's really just the stock market you know but really
food is expensive so expensive gas is expensive for the majority of the people in the united states they're not like living and
dying by the the stock market so that's not really a good barometer of success no and so i get it
like people being upset i hate to say it like you you guys blocking kim kardashian ain't gonna make
her any less she's already made her money. It's over. I know.
So you have been doing Sorry We're Stoned.
Today, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What show do you like doing better?
This one because it's way easier on me. What's your favorite show?
Truly this one because I just have to sit here and like laugh at some of your jokes and like tear you down on others, you know?
It's much easier on me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're me in the other one.
I know, it sucks.
Doesn't it? Yeah. Do you get paid more yeah you're me in the other one i know it sucks doesn't it yeah do you get paid
more because you're like no i get paid i don't make anything on that show you don't no we're
in the hole so much like it's crazy but does does tish is it split 50 50 for you guys i mean it is
but we make no money so really we don't make anything but you guys i see like you guys go
viral all the time and stuff.
Yeah, but that doesn't equal dollars.
That's true.
You know?
No mo.
That's very true.
Yeah.
Today's the last day that I'm going to be 40, 39.
Oh, God.
Jesus.
What do you think happens next?
Do you think anything really changes for me?
Yeah.
What do you think is going to change?
I think we're already starting to see the signs.
Yeah, we are starting to see the signs. yeah you have a lot more um feelings do i about things yeah what do i have feelings about um i mean you're constantly on a fucking rant what was
the last one about but hold on i've always and then at the end of the rant you're like oh i'm
that old guy yeah i know i know yeah yeah yeah
but i'm always going on rants yeah but it used to be like my rants would be like when the waiter
would fill my coffee up with more coffee but then had disrupted the perfect symbiotic relationship
between sugar and creamer and coffee and then all of a sudden i'm having to be an alchemist trying
to figure out the correct balance, you know?
That's true.
And now it's like Netflix is fucking up the world.
Oh, yeah.
That wasn't a rant.
Yeah.
Speaking of Netflix, did you ever watch Baby Reindeer?
I don't want to.
I get it.
I don't want to.
And me saying it was like the best show got some heat, actually.
Oh, did it?
A lot of people, like Chris Harrison, because I posted it. Chris Harrison was like, best show got some heat actually did it a lot of people like chris harrison
because i posted it chris harrison was like no way fuck that show and i hated it oh he was like
way too dark then he was like i'm loving fallout and i'm like oh i like that too yeah a lot of
people were like it's too dark and i get it the show is about this guy who is being stalked by this woman.
And it's a real life story.
Like it starts with like, this is a true story.
And the real life woman has come forward.
She was on Piers Morgan the other night.
Categorically denies.
Isn't it Piers Morgan?
Whatever.
Fuck that guy.
I think it is.
Piers? It's Piers? I think it's pierce it's peers i think it's peers okay peers peers morgan right like p-e-e-r-s right peers
peers am i wrong about this let me do it i'll tell you what that's the most
pierce morgan thing i've ever heard is that his name is peers i think
yeah pierce morgan yeah come on it's not pierce morgan The only Pierce Morgan thing I've ever heard is that his name is Piers. I think. Yeah. Piers Morgan.
Yeah.
Come on.
It's not Pierce Morgan.
No.
She goes on Piers.
Piers.
Piers.
Like Piers.
Like your Piers.
Like P-E-E-R-S. It just felt a little different.
Piers.
P-I-E-R-S.
She goes on Piers Morgan.
There you go.
God, now it sounds wrong.
It's not.
I'm sticking with Piers Morgan.
And she categorically denies everything that happened.
And Pierce is like, wait, hold on.
You just said you never sent him an email.
Now you're saying you sent him a couple of emails?
Like she just starts to lie when she says she's going to sue him and Netflix for saying it was true.
If you have the stomach for it, you got to watch that show. But you don you have the stomach for it, you gotta watch that
show. But you don't have the stomach for it.
No. Alright.
Do you have the stomach to start the show? Yeah, we should start the show.
Alright. I think it's me, but you're a guest
in my house, so. You should do it. Alright. Bros and
hoes, you're listening to your favorite thing podcast with
Wells and Brandy and Boo!
And Boo!
She's so cute. Yeah, she's
needy. I love it. I's so cute. Yeah, she's needy.
I love it.
I know.
Yeah.
She does like my couch.
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Do it. I hang out here and I can hear a lot. You do? What do you do in here? I watch TV. Okay.
I hang out here and here a lot.
You do?
What do you do in here?
I watch TV.
Okay.
Every man needs a cave.
That's true.
And I saw this thing of like why this happens. And it's because when you're a man and you're single, the whole apartment's yours.
True.
And then you get married and you have kids.
And then all of a sudden, nothing's yours anymore.
So that's why men get man caves or in my situation in the office.
Do you have a tan line from your shoes? Oh, so's really bad oh so bad yes we i need to know yeah they need to
see this oh my god wells how did this happen wiki feet okay put them down a little bit oh my god
this is just yeah really and like you're so tan up top oh yeah well even like do you see how white
it gets yeah don't say oh god show me see how white it gets yeah yeah but the feet though
something that's how you know you're around a golfer wow okay that's something else you gotta
fix that you need to go outside and put spf on your legs and tan your feet. I just need to get some sandal time in.
Are you still filming it?
Put them back.
It's something about the lighting right here.
Hold still.
Oh, my God.
No, no.
Put it back.
Put it back.
Put them back behind you like you had them.
Like this?
No, under your chair a little bit.
Yes.
It's so bad.
It's insane.
Okay, I'm done.
All righty.
This is going to be a lot to edit today.
So do you have some fave things?
I do and I don't.
Okay.
Okay, I know it's old at this point.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I finally watched Oppenheimer.
Oh, yeah, i didn't love it
i didn't either okay thank you and i know that's a really hot take and we're probably gonna get
shit on for that i don't think so really i don't know if you remember my complaint about it but my
complaint about it was i wanted more of like the bomb building and stuff i could care less about the trial about him being a communist. I know.
I was like, who gives a shit?
Yeah. My thing,
and I'm going to kind of
steal some insight from Dominic,
because he and I were chatting about it. Okay. Like, listen,
all the actors
obviously gave amazing performances. You have
a stacked cast. Cillian Murphy,
his performance, phenomenal.
Worthy of his awards. Totally get
all that for Killian Murphy. The rest of the actors, like, although they, their performance
was good, like they acted it well. I thought their roles were just kind of like, meh. Like,
it's not like the roles were written very well for them. I feel like they were just, it was a,
it was a fine movie and it was all fine, but just not worthy of like all the accolades it was given
as a whole also
i thought like even though killian's role was really good and he performed that well and
everything like this is cinematography in the movie was just meh really i just thought it was
just okay and like it's no interstellar you know what i mean like it was just no it was no dark
night like it was just well those are two hard movies to live up to. No, I know.
But like those are two of his movies that I feel like deserved all the awards. Yeah.
And for this one to just have been so recognized and given so many things, I thought it was
just meh.
It's my hot take.
All right.
So that's it.
For Oppenheimer.
Yeah.
There's a new trend out there.
Oh.
And I'm a little.
Is it Capri's?
No, we already talked about that.
And I haven't really seen that
so I'm not sure if you're right about that
oh it's all over the Instagram
is it?
yeah algorithm yeah
hate it
okay well the other thing
that's all over the social media
is coloring your nails
with the color of your man's tip
have you heard about this?
I have not
and I don't think that is a trend Wells
I think this is your freaky algorithm
and no one else's you think that I think this is your freaky algorithm and no one else's.
You think that I made
this up or like four people are
doing it and they were like, you know who's a freak show?
Wells is. Yes, I do.
B, yes.
Well, anyways, it's a big thing.
I don't think so. Apparently, girls are
coloring their nails with the
color of their man's tip.
And by tip, I mean the tip of his.
Are they like taking it in for a color match?
Like how is that working exactly?
I don't even know how it works.
Sarah doesn't have a color palette of my peepees.
Like are they taking a photo and taking it into the nail salon and like holding it up?
Yeah, like, oh, this one's, it's more purple than this.
Yeah, yeah, this one's got a yellow tint.
I don't know, like.
Okay, and the vein right here needs, but yeah, that's a real thing. I don't think, I don't think it's a's more purple than this yeah this one's got a yellow tint i don't know like okay and the vein right here needs but yeah that's a real thing i don't think i don't think it's a trend though
okay let me google it real quick tiktok getting my nails the color of his tip no nail color of
boyfriend's tip this cannot be real look at the color they need to ban TikTok immediately. This is absurd. Ew, but the ew.
Ew, but the ew.
That's my favorite.
You like that sound?
Yeah.
Ew. I fucking hate it.
Why?
It's so fucking.
I hate it.
It drives me crazy.
Yeah, but it's so.
It's too overused.
Maybe so.
But not for this.
True.
Have you seen what they're doing at the Denver airport?
No.
Oh, you're going to love this.
I love the Denver airport conspiracies. Oh, I know you do. Do tell. I know you do. I need to at the Denver airport. No. Oh, you're going to love this. I love the Denver airport conspiracies.
Oh, I know you do.
I know you do.
I need to put the TV on.
I want you to see it.
Yeah, I want to see.
Okay.
A bunch of YFTers sent me this.
Okay.
But it says, what else are they hiding?
So Denver's airport marketing team said, fuck it.
One of them says construction or cover up.
So this is at the Denver airport where they have like a bunch of like drywall, like covering where they're like doing some building.
We've talked about the craziness that is the Denver airport where it's just like Illuminati everything.
Right.
Then there's another one that says, are we creating the world's greatest airport or preparing for the end of the world
with the blue horse with a blue horse with lasers coming out of it you know about the blue horse
right no tell me all about it you don't know about the blue fucking horse no what is it okay it's
this massive statue that sits right outside the entrance to the airport and the guy that built it
died while building it.
Google it.
I'm pretty sure you're going to love this.
It's because when he was building it, the horse's penis fell off and hit him in the
head and killed him.
What color was the tip of the penis?
Don't know.
Give it a Google.
Blue probably.
And then the statue is still there to this day.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
Well, okay.
So then there's another piece of drywall covering up where they're
doing construction in the denver airport with a man with a lizard's head and it says what are we
doing oh is it supposed to be lizard people yes and it says a adding amazing new restaurants and
bars b building an illuminati headquarters or c remodeling the lizard people's lair.
No!
I can't see that part. That's
hilarious. So the Denver
airport just said
fuck it.
I love it. Isn't that great?
It is good.
So anyways, a lot of YFTers
sent us that.
Marketing team, honestly. Dude, you know what I got
going on right now? I got that YFTers sent us that. Yeah, marketing team, honestly. Dude, you know what I got going on right now?
I got that thing where just the lid of your eyelid just twitches for a while.
They say to eat a banana.
Banana, no potassium.
First of all, bananas give me...
Touched a nerve there.
Yeah, well, bananas give me heartburn.
Oh.
Yeah.
You're old.
That happened to me before I...
You did?
Yeah.
I've never had heartburn.
You've never had heartburn you've never had heartburn
no well it must be nice it is nice i don't even really know what that would feel like you are
combative today it's crazy i did watch something that we talked about a little bit last week
and of course a book that we both dark matter yes gosh dang it i tried watching it last night
and i was just so tired from not sleeping
the night before that i fell asleep and couldn't watch it okay so here's my thing on it okay and
this might be not ruin i won't well you've read the book no
how could i ruin it for you It's fucking different. It's freaking the fucking book.
The show could be different.
Yeah, okay.
I read it so long ago that I'm not sure if I could tell you.
Okay.
A man is abducted into an alternate version of his life.
Amid the mind-bending landscape of lives he could have lived,
he embarks on a harrowing journey to get back
to his true family and save them from the most terrifying foe himself.
Love.
It's great.
Jennifer Coolidge is in it.
No, sorry.
Jennifer Connelly.
Two very different Jennifers.
I know.
I had such a big crush on Jennifer Connelly back in the day.
You did.
Oh, yeah. She's totally your type. Brunette, big eyebrows. Jennifer Connelly back in the day. You did? Oh, yeah.
She's totally your type.
Brunette, big eyebrows?
Mm-hmm.
Come on.
Yeah.
In the labyrinth?
Mm-hmm.
Give me a break.
Joel Egerton is the main guy.
Mm-hmm.
Great casting, by the way.
Yeah.
Also, the guy from Westworld's in it.
Yep, Jimmy Simpson.
Yep.
Elise Braga, who's been in, like, everything.
It's great.
Is it?
And I totally, like, I forgot. braga who's been in like everything it's great is it and i totally like i forgot like i remember
it was like a schrodinger schrodinger's cat situation where it's like this box and it's
like whatever i know it's like going to different worlds type of a thing and then the first episode
is what happens in the beginning he's like walking up from the bar and he gets mugged right and i was
like oh i remember exactly what happens and then it was less fun
because i was like this isn't going to be such an amazing journey because i already know what's
going to happen because i read the book which is such a douchey thing to say it's such the like
the book is better i mean it is but i get it you know the book was so good you should go read it
but like so good but you're in for such a treat if you didn't read the book because you're going
to be like what's going on i mean definitely people if you didn't read the book. I know. Because you're going to be like, what's going on? I mean, definitely people, if they haven't read the book, should watch the show first and then go read the book.
Yeah.
Dark Matter on Apple TV.
Yeah.
My mom loves it too.
Really?
Yeah.
She was raving about it.
How many episodes?
I've only watched the first episode.
There's three.
There's three episodes out right now.
Oh, yeah.
I watched the second one.
Yeah.
I got to start it.
I really, I was so excited about it last night, but I only slept four hours on Thursday night.
So I slept 12 last night. Were you with a man? No. I was to start it. I was so excited about it last night, but I only slept four hours on Thursday night, so I slept 12 last night.
Were you with a man?
No, I was playing a show.
There could have been a man there.
There was not.
Was there a woman?
And I was really disappointed.
I was told that there were some hot-ass cowboys in Calgary, and I didn't meet any.
I also didn't stay very long, but you know.
Yeah, you got to try.
I know, but I got things to do.
I had to get going.
Yeah.
Sadly. But I'll be get going. Yeah. Sadly.
But I'll be back in Calgary in July.
So if you are a hot cowboy from Calgary, come meet me in July.
Okay.
Okay, great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Actually, I think it's June.
Wait a second.
No, it's July.
Okay.
Well, I think we have a link of all your shows on the YFT thing.
We actually don't because I forgot to send it.
Classic me.
But we will soon. You don't have a forgot to send it classic me um but we will soon
you don't have a link tree of like where to get tickets for your shit no i do it's in my bio
oh okay yeah i'll just give them that i guess yeah if you just go to brandy's instagram page
nobody wants to go actually that's not true calgary was packed and i always at my shows i
have a lot of wife tears there you go i love a lot of them that say i love i love yft well that's
amazing i know it's really i don't know if i believe it it's true well they might be like i know what she
does i'll just tell her i love yft i really listen do you get more i love yfts or sorry
or stones i get both really i really do you know what i heard recently so it was a tiktok where a
guy was you love tiktok hey, I gotta get fucking material somewhere.
Okay, okay, carry on.
Don't give me shit for having fucking content.
You're right.
It was this guy and he was talking to his nephew
and his nephew was like, you know,
in fifth grade or sixth grade or something like that.
And he was asking like what his favorite subject was
and his nephew was like, Oh, like recess or whatever.
P E you know?
So the guy was like,
Oh my God,
you love dodgeball.
And the nephew was like,
I don't know what that is.
And he looked it up.
Do you know that dodgeball has been banned,
banned from school?
Why?
I have no idea.
Cause it's like they could get hurt or something.
I guess,
but you can get hurt anywhere.
Also like we're just asking for everyone to be a sissy these days.
Like, come on.
Yeah.
Let's build some grit in our youth.
Yeah, man.
You know what I'm saying?
You need to get smacked in the face with those little small red balls.
Absolutely.
That when it hits, it goes bing!
And it rings your bell like the church steeple, man.
I agree. I loved dodgeball loved and i didn't
even really like pe but i loved dodgeball i mean it teaches you a lot about life it really does
one who the weak ones are you know you find out real quick who's fucking last picked
who like if shit went down yeah who you'd pick. Listen, that's a hard truth you got to learn sometimes.
Yep.
It taught you, you got to keep your head on a swivel.
Yeah.
You don't know where shit's coming.
Improves your reflexes.
It's an allegory for life, you know.
You might think the danger's over there, but sometimes it's over here.
True.
Yeah.
And also, sometimes you got smacked in the fucking face.
I agree.
I would love it when like the the popular kids
headhunting for slammed for caleb yep he's going down that pretty face of yours
that pretty face of yours you're getting the
man did i love dodgeball yeah and i had such a good system for dodgeball i'm sure you did you
know what I did?
Tell me.
Okay, so what a lot of people would do was they'd go get a ball,
and they would wait for someone to throw the ball at them,
and then they'd use the ball to deflect. Oh, genius.
Right?
But when you do that, you take away the most important thing about dodgeball,
which is the reversal.
Because if you catch that ball, they're out and now you have a ball.
So what I would do,
and I'm giving you guys tips on a game
you can't play anymore.
What I would do is I would hold the ball
and I'd be like waiting for them to throw it at me.
And then they throw it at me.
And at the last second,
I would put my ball down, catch theirs.
Boom. Who's got two balls some
titties right here ready to fucking rumble and jumble and then you know what i would do either
i would take them both or i'd be like zander got you one buddy zander taking down caleb that fuck
man i am so sad the kids don't get to play dodgeball i know it really is just a classic
you know what i bet they also don't have is red rover because red rover could get people like
clothesline like do you remember that game of course red rover red rovers and brandy right over
kindergarten oh yeah you know yeah i started him young okay so if you don't know what this game is
it was you'd get a bunch of people in a line. They'd all hold hands.
And so there'd be two lines parallel looking at one another.
And one line would say, okay, who's the bitch?
Who's the weak link?
Who's the weakest link?
Okay, Caleb.
Red Rover, Red Rover said Caleb right over.
Somebody named Caleb really hurt me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then he would run as fast as humanly possible
to try
to break through. But if you
held strong and Caleb gets
fucking
clotheslined and goes down,
he's out of there. But if Caleb
was smart, which he's not, he
would look for the weakest link. Absolutely.
Oh, yeah. To break through.
Another great allegory
for life, you know? you know yeah sometimes the easiest path
yeah is not right in front of you and you gotta look around you know i'm worried about the youth
the youth they're not gonna learn these precious life lessons that's why we suggest every schooling
system in the continent the contiguous united states plays yft every schooling system in the continent, the contiguous United States, plays YFT every morning.
Why just the contiguous?
I don't know.
It made it sound smarter.
Why are we acting out Alaska and Hawaii here?
Nope.
They can't listen?
Nope.
Okay.
I don't, no, I don't, I don't.
Is that what that means?
Yes.
On the continent.
No, the contiguous U.S. of the states that touch.
Contiguous means touch?
Yes!
Red Rover, Red Rover, send Alaska right over.
I know, I weep for the youth.
I weep for you sometimes.
Listen, Alaska and Hawaii don't get our get our curriculum okay they don't understand it
sure you know yeah and also i bet in alaska and hawaii they're still playing
red rover definitely in alaska for sure for sure it's a lawless place up there
i would assume i don't know never been i've never been. I don't even know if I should do this, but.
Okay.
I think I'm going to.
Okay.
Have you ever heard on a radio station where they call a man and they say, congratulations, we're from 1-800-Flowers.
You've won free flowers to send to anybody.
Okay.
We got your name off a server or whatever.
we got your name off a server or whatever all we need is the name of the person you want to send the flowers to and the address and a phone number and we'll send them to them okay have you never
heard this probably i also haven't listened to a radio in at least 10 years for sure so then they'll
call the guy and then the guy will it was set up by like the girlfriend of the wife right and so if
he doesn't give the flowers to the wife to the wife
or the girlfriend and he gives it to somebody else obviously he's cheating on her genius and
it's fucked up how to catch a cheater exactly wait that should be a show like how to catch a killer
but a cheater i think that there is a cheater show is it called how to Catch a Cheater? Because it should be. There's How to Catch a Predator. Also good.
That one's good.
Also good.
Chris Hansen.
Do you know what's so funny about Chris Hansen,
the host of To Catch a Predator?
You know what was funny when I was on The Bachelor one time,
I called Chris Harrison Chris Hansen,
and I thought it was very funny.
Anyways, the roses thing.
And so it's on the radio, and it's like, it's always a guy cheating, right?
Classic.
Well, you know, attracts.
I hate that I'm going to ruin this for you.
Okay.
But it annoys me a little bit.
It's illegal to record someone's voice without their knowledge and put it on the radio all of those things are fake
sorry i ruined the bit but that's not a real thing you can't you can't do that to somebody
damn that's stupid i was it was like on like a social media thing it was like a radio station
in and i wrote i hate to do this to you guys, but a radio guy for 16 years,
this is illegal, you can't do this, this is fake.
And they wrote back,
some laws are different in other places than they are.
And I was like, no, it's a federal law.
You can't do that.
Damn.
I know, so sorry I ruined everyone's life there.
That is crazy.
I know.
Or just change the law and then make it legal. We should ruined everyone's life there. That is crazy. I know. Or just change the law.
Yeah.
And then make it legal.
We should.
That's still funny.
And then also bring back Dodgeball and Red Rover, if that's a thing.
There's a new circle out.
Never seen it.
You've never seen the circle?
Never.
What?
Never.
You've never seen the circle?
No.
Where a bunch of people go and they talk via text message and shit?
I know of it.
I've never seen it.
Well, anyways, there's another one.
Oh.
What season are we on now?
No fucking clue.
Way too many.
Way too many.
Are you into it?
I do like the twist.
Is there anybody we know on there or no?
Not really.
Okay.
The twist this year is someone is an AI.
So it's an AI.
That's smart.
Yeah.
Genius.
The AI is pretty good.
So all I got to tell you guys is we're fucked.
Seriously.
Man, they're coming after reality TV.
Yikes.
I should block them.
Yeah.
Oh, John Mulaney has a new show out that I've been enjoying thoroughly, but it is very niche.
Okay.
It's called Everybody's in LA.
Okay.
Have you seen this?
No.
I feel like I might like it.
I think you will love it.
Yeah.
Because it's so fucking.
True. True. because it's so fucking true.
It's on Netflix and John Mulaney, a comedian,
explores Los Angeles during a week
when many comedians are in town,
captured in six live shows.
In the first episode, he pulls down a map of Los Angeles
and he just explains like what los angeles is
and it's so funny if you have lived or been to los angeles to hear what he has to say like
this is los angeles this is where you think movies are made they're not movies are now made in canada
or in atlanta they're not here if they are made here, they're made in this place, studio city,
which isn't a city.
It's a neighborhood.
Kind of like how Korea town isn't a town.
It's a neighborhood.
And like,
so he goes through it like that.
He does such a good job of explaining the thing.
He's only doing six episode.
Every episode has like a different topic.
The first one is the topic is coyotes and how they're everywhere.
Anyways,
it's super niche.
If you are from LA or have ever been to Southern California,
this show is for you.
Okay.
That sounds great.
You will.
Yeah.
Okay.
Just watch like the first like 15 minutes and then you're good.
All right.
Like when the guests come on,
it kind of starts to get great.
Yeah.
Like Jerry Seinfeld is the first guest and you like,
it's like,
okay.
I like the beginning part. I see. Anyways, and you're like, it's like, okay. Okay. I like the beginning part.
Oh, I see.
Anyways, I think you'll like that.
That's hilarious.
I have a book for you, by the way.
It's called One of Us.
Big reader.
You know.
Listener.
How dare you?
Wait, I have a show.
Okay, give it to us.
It's trash TV at its finest.
Okay.
But have you seen this new reality show
about the Grand Cayman Islands?
No.
Oh, you need to.
Grand Cayman.
It's actually Cayman.
If you've been there,
that's what the locals call it.
Grand Cayman.
Secrets in Paradise.
I think it's on Hulu.
It's about like a friend group, I guess.
And like half of them are like Cayman locals. and the other half are, what do they call it?
Expats or whatever.
Yeah.
But the friend group is largely circled around Armie Hammer's ex-wife.
So you get a lot of that tea.
And it's pretty good.
I mean, it's what I put on when I'm also like doing something on the computer, you know.
But it's pretty good trash TV, I have to say.
And after having been to the K-Mmans earlier this year, I feel invested.
You know what I mean?
Sexy and full of secrets, this alluring new docu-soap allows a group of super rich, up-and-coming locals and expats
as they navigate the turbulent waters of their relationships, friendships, and careers in the paradise that is Big K-Man.
Am I saying that right?
K-Man?
K-Man.
That's how they say it there.
Yeah.
Which is kind of wild.
I don't love that.
I don't either, but that is how the locals say it.
Does it make it right?
Telling you what I'm telling you.
Yeah.
Fair enough.
But it's good.
If you like trash TV, it's pretty good.
Okay.
I have a book.
It's called One of Us by J.T. Ellison, a New York Times bestselling author. you yeah fair enough but it's good if you like trash tv it's pretty good okay i have a book it's
called one of us by jt ellison new york times best-selling author olivia bender designs exquisite
home interiors that satisfy the most demanding clients but her own deepest desire can't be
fulfilled by marble countertops or a perfect. She desperately wants to be a mother.
Fertility treatments and IVF keep failing,
and just when she feels she's at her lowest point,
the police deliver shocking news to Olivia and her husband, Park. DNA results show the prime suspect in a murder investigation is Park's son.
Olivia is relieved, knowing this is a mistake.
Despite their desire, the Benders don't have any children.
Then comes the confession.
Many years ago, Park donated sperm to a clinic.
Oh, God.
He has no idea how many times it was sold or how many children he's sired.
As the murder investigation goes deeper, more terrible truths come to light.
With every revelation, Olivia must face the unthinkable.
The man she married has fathered a killer.
But can she hold that against him when she keeps such dark secrets of her own?
One of us.
It's pretty good.
Okay.
The thing that's really going to get you into it, it takes place in Nashville, Tennessee.
No.
Yeah.
This is an untrue story.
Fiction.
Yeah.
In the first scene.
Why Nashville?
Well, because she's an interior designer and she's like all over the place because Nashville's like.
Yeah, yeah.
But it's like they, like she drops her sister-in-law off at Fido's.
That's insane.
They're talking about things.
I'm like, oh, yeah.
Okay.
They like live in Hillsborough Village.
Yeah.
You know, like I'm not finished with it, but.
So far pretty good?
Yeah, he's got like 28 kids.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
And I tell you what, Park, the guy who sired this many kids. Oh my God. Yeah. And I tell you what, Park, the guy who sired this many kids,
yeah, he's been around some death for some reason.
Hmm, fascinating.
Fascinating.
Okay.
Oh my gosh.
My sister.
What does she want?
She wants me to get a spray tan.
I don't want a spray tan.
I have a real tan.
I could use a spray tan on my feet.
Seriously.
You could. I do have this stuff called bro glow that i found have i told you about bro glow no it's self-tanned for men oh imagine that yeah
what a concept um it's pretty good that's genius yeah because you were giving me so much crap about
not putting on so you've used it yeah is that why you're so tan no no i haven't used it recently but i have i have used it and there
what do you use it for when i was like it was like winter time and i was pale and i was like
i gotta look i gotta look you know you want that you want that healthy glow i know sarah was like
what are you doing and i'm like i'm putting on some bro glow only lasts for like really like 24 hours is that how women's um self-tanner works uh depending on what you use it could last like
up to a week really um depends on like how much you shower how hot water you use how much you
exfoliate there's a lot of variables here yeah i don't do any of those things uh does the bro glow
have a have a scent of a smell a little. Because I fucking hate the way self-tanner smells.
I agree with that.
I remember like ex-girlfriends and I'd be like, oh God.
It smells rank.
So bad.
I hate it.
This one's not too bad.
Okay.
Broglo.
But yeah, Broglo.
Check it out.
Genius.
I know.
Put that on your feet immediately.
Although.
No, I just need them to get tanned.
Your feet would sweat and then it would all come off in your shoes.
Yeah, come on.
That's stupid.
I just need to go walk around in some sandals for a while.
I think you need to sit outside and let them bake.
Yeah.
And like spray SPF on the legs.
Just put some Crisco on it.
Yeah, or like wear sweatpants that cut right where the line is and just tan the feet.
Yeah.
Do you.
In a picture of you.
That's so funny.
Okay.
Do you know about Peter the Great of Russia?
I don't think I do.
Are you going to tell me? So he was a king of Russia and he had a sister named Natalia.
Peter the Great was like almost seven feet tall.
It's like super, super tall, right?
Someone was telling me about this, that Peter the Great and Natalia loved one thing and one thing only and it was collecting
little people or dwarves they would have them jump out of cakes all the time and just be always
around they collected like a like american girl dolls yeah american girl dolls yeah you know
they had them everywhere apparently they would have weddings and stuff where it would be like nothing but like...
Did I tell you how many they collected?
93.
That's a lot.
They collected 93 little people.
Wow.
And then they had this...
I guess they had this wedding, this party,
where they got them all fucked up.
And they all started fighting.
Oh.
And Peter and Natalia were like,
ah, this is so funny.
And he always had to be depicted next to a dwarf or a little person because he was so tall and they were so little.
There's a statue with him who looks really tall with the bronze statue of a little person.
And it was fucked up.
Where'd you hear about this?
Don't worry about where I found it.
Where'd you hear about this?
I'm an avid reader.
Voracious reader. Voracious reader.
Voracious?
Is that a word?
I don't know.
You're losing it.
Sarah's been to New York.
Oh, I saw the reader.
I am worried about you.
I'm pulling out encyclopedia Britannica's reading about fucking Peter the Great.
Oh, my God.
And his sister Natalia.
Not to be confused with Natalia Grace.
No.
Who was a little bit.
Oh, my God.
How did you not come to that on your own?
I can't believe it.
Yeah.
I wonder if she was named after her.
I'm crying.
She was.
I think she was Ukrainian.
Pretty close.
Well, yeah. like distance wise well actually i feel like well russia's just trying to take it back over you know
um i know it's old now okay you've already talked about it but i did watch the roast
oh did you like it though i fucking loved it yeah my only complaint is it was about 45 minutes too
long yeah so fucking long i know um but wow like it was just really great and so unhinged and i just loved every minute of it truly who was your favorite uh roaster um
nikki was amazing she was probably my favorite um i also listen i felt like kim's jokes were
pretty good yeah i guess they cut out her being booed no i saw i heard that really but it wasn't
like as dramatic as i thought it was going to be, so maybe they
cut some of it out. I heard that
Netflix went and cut out a bunch of it. Okay.
You hear a little bit of it, but maybe not as
bad as it was. But I thought her jokes were
funny. I thought her delivery was hilarious.
I thought she absolutely killed it. I was proud of her.
Rob Gronkowski is funny as
all hell. Oh, yeah. He's so funny.
Is it that he doesn't try to be funny?
Like, he's just himself. I think he doesn't try to be funny like he's just himself
i think he's a little bit in on the bit too like his whole like big dumb animal thing yeah i don't
know if he really is that he's not i've hung out with him a bunch he's not at all but like kind of
and it's funny yeah he's in on the joke at this point which makes it funnier yeah you know i i
guess i heard that um he you know he when he slammed the shot glass on the.
Oh, yes.
It broke and it fucking embedded in some girl's face.
Oh, my God.
That's a lawsuit waiting to happen.
Yeah.
Gronk got some money, though.
Gronk is so funny.
He was funny.
I don't, like, keep up with football.
So what's the beef with the coach and the other guy and who tried to take a shot to get Gronk, tried to get him to take a shot together?
What was the tea there?
Robert Kraft is the owner of the Patriots.
Okay.
And he effectively, I think he fired Belichick.
And now Belichick hasn't been hired by anybody.
And there's some beef there.
I tried to get him to take the shot.
And the coach was not having it.
No.
He was not having it.
He took like one sip of the shot
and put it back.
Yeah.
It was funny though.
I loved it.
Speaking of Brady,
the goat,
I started watching The Goat on Prime.
Oh, what's that?
It's a new reality show
that Elan made.
Grocery Store Joe is on it.
Tayshia is on it.
Tosh from Tosh.0
is the host.
Legends of reality television
compete to earn the title
of greatest reality show
contestant of all time.
It's like Tech
from Real World from like
the 90s. Jill
Zarin. Broey Joey from 90s. Jill Zarin.
Broey Joey from The Circle.
Joe Amabile.
Garcy Store Joe.
Raza something, I can't say his last name.
Kristen Doty.
Like, so all these like reality TV people, all these reality TV people are like competing for like to be the best.
Best reality TV star?
I guess. If you're a fan of reality TV star, I guess.
If you're a fan of reality TV stars, this might be good for you.
It's also like just really ridiculous.
But the first episode, I think everyone's just being nice
because it's like the beginning of the show.
I've got a feeling it gets a little spicy down the road.
You got anything else?
I would love to just trash WestJet Airlines for one minute.
WestJet Airlines?
Yes.
I've never even heard of WestJet.
Well, they're the only fucking airline
that flies nonstop from Nashville to Canada.
Or Calgary, I guess.
I've heard of NetJet.
No, no, this is far from NetJet.
Oh yeah, NetJet's private.
I don't know if it's WestJet.
I don't know if it's Canada.
I also flew it from Calgary to LAX.
They're living in the past. I think it's a little bit Canada. I think WestJet. I don't know if it's Canada. I also flew it from Calgary to LAX. They're living in the past.
I think it's a little bit Canada.
I think WestJet is a Canadian airline.
I think Canada needs to get with the times a little bit.
You know what I mean?
The Canada airport, the Calgary airport specifically.
Do you have a global entry?
Yes.
Have you ever been asked to show your global entry card?
You only need to show your card when you are debarking from port. So on cruise lines.
No, no. When you're debarking from Calgary, you have to show a card to go through the line for
global entry. That's not right. I didn't even know cards existed because I've never been asked
for one. And I was like, Oh, is this the global? Like I'm trying to find the global entry line.
She was like, this is it. And I was like, Oh like oh you guys you should get a sign like i said it like joke like funny like i wasn't mad
and she like did what didn't laugh and then i was like oh what do you need just my boarding pass and
she was like no i need your card and i was like you're going into canada leaving canada but you
do customs in calgary when you're oh it's weird all that to say yeah calgary get with the times a
little bit um west jet airlines has the
rudest fucking employee some blonde chick with a ponytail at the gate in calgary took my fucking
carry-on bag just to be a piece of shit the plane wasn't full and i i paid very close attention to
the bin space to see if it was warranted i boarded in group one have you and i was sitting in the
exit row i paid a lot of money to sit in the exit row, which also on WestJet, you pay them a
gazillion dollars for the flight ticket. And then you also have to pay a gazillion dollars to have
a seat, no matter what seat you can't even sit in the back of the plane for free or a middle seat.
You have to purchase a seat if you want an assigned seat. Yeah. So I boarded and she was
like, you have to check that. And I was like, Oh,
and she was like, it's not going to fit.
And I was like,
well,
it fit on the way here.
I flew on this airline on the same plane and it fit just fine.
Yeah.
And she,
and she was like,
no,
you have to,
you have to check that.
And she was like,
this,
this is a full flight.
That's bags too big.
And I was like,
I would really appreciate it if I could not check this bag because I'm on a
time crunch when I landed LAX.
And I like tried to be really nice about it and just,
and said like, can I please just try it? And like, like if it doesn't fit I'll bring it to gate no and so she took my fucking bag guess how many open bins there were once the plane was
fully boarded how many four right next to me oh you should have said
if there's ever an option to fly back to Canadaada on not west yard airlines you can bet i will book
any other airline i love that thank you very much i love it you're going on rants now i i just can't
stand when airline employees feel like they need to like make a point exercise some like ridiculous
play of power on someone for absolutely no reason and ruin their day for
absolutely no reason it was just like why did you have to do that to me yeah i paid a lot of money
for this plane ticket like really you can't let me take my carry-on bag that does fit in the overhead
bin okay i mean so i assume that that's like the the spirit airlines of canada i guess so i didn't
know yeah because there's also an airline called Flair Airlines that scares me because I've never
heard of it and their planes look scary.
I was told that's the spirit of Canada.
I mean, a flare is something that you shoot up when you're in trouble, when your plane
is crashed and you're on the flotation device.
Well, that's the name of the airline.
And I was like hmm pass
pass on that one and i booked west jet because it was it was a partnered with delta and you know
delta supposed to be pretty good although i've never had a good experience on delta in the past
year or so either their customer service is shit um so yeah west jet not a fan well fuck you guys
yeah you have any musics i wanted to say you going to kill me and be like, I just spilled everything.
We shouldn't give,
they don't need our promotion.
I'm sorry.
The new Post Malone and Morgan Wallen song
is a fucking smash.
We can go out on it.
Let's play a little bit of it.
By the way,
so I played this guy,
I called him MKG.
I think his name is McGee last week
and you did not like it.
And you're like,
it's fine.
Okay.
That was fine.
It's not that I didn't like it. I thought was fine i have been obsessed with this guy i didn't say i didn't like
it i said it was fine anyways i just wanted you to know that like not only did i like it i am like
i've listened to his entire new album today it's so good anyways okay you want to go something else
i liked too you want to go out on is it under morgan wallen or is it under i think it's so good. Anyways. Okay. You want to go out? There was something else I liked too.
You want to go out on,
is it under Morgan Wallen or is it under?
I think it's under Morgan.
Oh no.
Post Malone,
Morgan Wallen.
Both of them.
What do you got coming up?
I'm going to Vegas tomorrow.
Vag.
Won't be tomorrow when this podcast comes out.
Yeah.
But when this podcast
does come out
in a few days
I'll be playing
at Hangout Music Festival
which I'm really pumped about.
Cool.
I know that you love
that music festival a lot.
I do.
Wish you were coming
to see me this year.
But I'm playing on Saturday
at 3 o'clock
if any wives here
find themselves at Hangout.
What stage are you at?
I think it's called
like the Monster Beach stage
or something.
Monster something stage on the
beach. And then Sunday I'm playing at EDC. What does that mean? You know what EDC is? It's the
biggest electronic musical festival in the world. Brandy, do I look like a electronic music festival
guy? It doesn't matter. EDC, Electric Daisy Carnival, it is iconic. Is it? Yes. There's one in Mexico. There's one in Orlando. But the biggest
one's in Vegas. Anyway, I'll be playing
on Sunday on the
EDM stage, which is a
country EDM genre
stage. Our buddy Blake Horstman
is also playing on that stage on Sunday.
You gotta have a bigger crowd than him.
But obviously, like, wife tears might love Blake
so come see us on Sunday if you're
at EDC. I know, but you need to tears might love Blake. So come see us on Sunday. If you're at EDC.
I know,
but you need to be,
you need to beat him.
Yeah.
Um,
I wonder if Blake will bring his baby like rave.
Yeah.
With like,
and put the big headphones or the big ear.
I wouldn't put it past him.
Yeah.
You got to use all the tactics you got,
you know?
Yeah.
We'll tell Blake and Gia.
Gigi.
Gigi?
When I say hello.
Hello.
I'm going to Bandon Dunes on the 18th. I don't know what that is.
It's a golf course that I've always wanted to play.
This is for my 40th birthday.
Your tan's just going to get worse.
It's up in Oregon.
It's gonna be like dreary and rainy.
Might help you out then.
And then I'll be in New York.
And I will say this to all the YFTers.
Sarah's opening night at Little Shop of Horrors
is the 28th.
Oh, that's soon.
I know.
So I want all the New York YFTers.
Come on out.
Sick. I'll be there. want all the New York wife tears. Come on out. Sick.
I'll be there.
You should too.
Cute.
Cut.
All right.
Are we good?
Poppy makes me burp.
My eye is fucking twitching.
I need a banana. Did he get in trouble for throwing that chair or what's happening?
I mean, not legally, but he's probably should have.
Yeah.
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