Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - 292-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura

Episode Date: May 14, 2015

One of the great things about our show is that both Mexicans and Blacks like it. They can both tolerate listening to it and not get upset. It's also what some say about Art Laboe's radio show inside jail.  We got a bunch of prison shout outs, you know what I'm sayin? And we revist some of the all-time great know what I'm sayin's. Shout out to Butter and Mr. Criminal. One love, homie.  Plus, how can you tell when an online fart is manufactured? Is there anything that can be done to PROVE what we're witnessing? We make a plea to you, the little mommy, to help us get a return message from Gloria Estefan. Can you ask her to write back to us? And we're getting another dog - this one won't be a Huxtable. Check out our name options on the show! Be the JEANS!

Attention special announcement to Canadian jeans. I am coming to Canada the great Manada where Christina Was born the Canadian citizen Christina. Well the best part Windsor, Ontario Check it out. I'm coming. It was just added to Calgary, Alberta, Canada June 13th. It's a Saturday two shows at the Laugh Shop I'm doing that right after Phoenix Fartnix and Las Vegas on June 11th and June 12th. I have one show in Phoenix

Stand-up live one show bonkers comedy club in Las Vegas June 12th, and then I fly up to Calgary and that's it the rest of the month Chicago at Park West they don't know where that is Chicago. Thank you June 27th and June 28th in Pontiac, Michigan at the Crowfoot Ballroom I'm very excited about those shows. I also we should announce that Christina and I are both going to Montreal for the Just For Laugh comedy festival Those tickets are on sale My I'm doing shows the 20th through the 24th 10 30 p.m. Shows every night and if you go to TomSquare.com you can see those. We're also doing the podcast live

July 23rd and that ticket is also on sale if you want to Get in on that and then the other Canadian thing I added was Vancouver Vancouver August 8th TomSquare.com for all of those I'm going to be in Denver June 18th June 19th June 20th and June 21st. Oh, wait a minute though June 18th. That's my Smurf day. That's your Smurf day. You're turning 64 June 18th. That's so rude. That's awesome. Can you believe how old I am jeans? 39

It's pretty nuts, man. It's horrible June 18th you guys. I'll be 29 years old Are those tickets at Thousand Ranch? ThousandRanch.com. Do you have our podcast thing on sale too? For Montreal? Yeah. No, not yet. I'm excited. I know they just announced it All right, I'll link it up and then people asked. I'm also going to Fartford and Fartford Comenetica? Yeah, that's in July. It's one show. So all at TomSquare.com or ThousandRanch.com Make sure you check those out. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Do you like this? Yeah, this is jazzy It's cool G-wrap. I'm on the road to the bitches

We're now in five years old. I like that. I like it. This is like a real song though I mean cool G-wrap sampled Billy Joel and then this is a 80s hit. I Like it being a billion it takes years to work You have just like that guy. I do. You want to hear the real song? Sure. It's pretty great. I like that Carrival though, they might pull it down. Whatever on SoundCloud You pull it down Rapper Just like you

No, no, see You could be a rapper You can't be a gangster. You don't want to be a gangster. Yeah, that's true Check it out Well, G-wrapping polo. This is when they used to have like The same as what there's quarters in all the music videos He's super underrated I

Love this guy If he likes him too, look at him. He's like, I love that cool G-wrap motherfucker You ready to start the show I'm so ready. Let's do it. Let's party guys So in the LA County Jail a number of years ago, they they used to have a Music playing that everybody could hear and they said that my show was the only one that but the that the Mexicans and the blacks Would tolerate because they both like the same music was mostly by black artists Don't bring anyone loving to this No, I'm in the fucking stand welcome. Welcome to your mom's house

Christina Oh Say powerful. Hey, is my watchma call it there the one from like a couple weeks ago. I threw it away Why I was gonna eat that it was sitting open here forever. That's why it's my it's my podcast snack Come on, that's true. I like to work. You're an animal No, it tastes good when it's a little hard. That's not okay No, I saw it here and I keep seeing it here Somebody gave you one to give me this weekend. Well, where is it? I ate it you did yeah, it's a good, huh?

It was all right. Don't say that. It was I was in Chattanooga and in the middle of my set a guy put it on the stool Do you know how crazy that is though when you're like when you're on stage? Yeah, I do walks. I was like, what are you doing? Yeah, he puts a watchma call it up there and did you have a hard time continuing your set? Because you you wanted to resist the temptation to open that thing up. No, I'm not I'm not into it like you are it's so good Man, it's okay. It's fine. It's fine, but you ate it. I ate it because I was bored later This is a silly reason. Yeah, that's silly We should mention that we're streaming this right now on the periscope app. Yeah on your my phone on my my phone

There's periscope. It's so cool. This is so fucking cool people from all over the world right now We're watching us in our bath robes. I don't know if they're still watching with me No, there's people giving us hearts They're sending you kisses. There's two people watching this I don't know if they can hear. Oh, there's audio. No, I know I'm saying. I don't know if it's you know clear enough to hear Oh to hear what we're saying Maybe it is. I don't know. Well, we'll figure it out. This is just a test run you guys Yeah, we just thought if we need to throw it up. What a neat app. I'm surprised that it hasn't been

Oh, is it neat? It's really neat. It's cool. It's got slick stuff. Yeah, it's neat and raw But it's gonna degenerate into people just jerking off. It's cool stuff slick stuff neat stuff. Yeah Fifa what you want to go down now? What are you doing, man? Come on, thief. You know the drill. All right He wants to go down. He's gonna go lay in his bed. Yeah, I didn't really look at did you check the feedback on candy bars? There wasn't a ton from what I saw Yeah, I didn't see a lot of the feedback. It's still the jiff Skippy debate continues rage is on Yeah, because it's not really a debate. It's a great debate in our times

You haven't even you said you were gonna get into some Jeff and see what was up. I said I was gonna yeah I think I bought some didn't I? No, I wanted to get that Reese's kind. No way, but you did have some Jeff when we were in Cincinnati Yeah, yeah, someone gave it to us. We got it. What'd you think then? It was okay. It's no skippy It was okay, that's such fucking bullshit. It was okay It just tasted like greasy greasy dirty peanut butter full of high hydrogen and oil dude That's such bullshit That's it's not it's not real. You know what I got instead the whole farts brand to try that I tried that you like it

Yeah, that's good It's not as good as skippy, but it's way better than skippy. That's skippy's the best skippy's trash And I got lots of ragu lots of shaky cheese. We're all stocked up What? so Remember last week you said you used to listen to Carl LeBeau That was inaccurate yeah, and I'm a million people tweeted they're like it's art LeBeau mommy art LeBeau and Forgot yeah that guy art LeBeau has a radio DJ. He's a thousand years old

He's been on LA radio. He's so old. He looks like a reptile. Yeah, so Google art LeBeau LABOE I think L.E. L.E.B.O.E. Yeah, he looks so old. He's all he's barely alive In the meantime, I have a request from Adam Siem. He did the article to his friend Yadera and Want to hear I he wants to hear I pledge my love for you Yadera, so here it is That's that's basically his game and I wanted to find a better clip because they're usually way more sentimental. They're like This dedication comes from shy girl to her homie who's locked up in San Quentin Baby, you know, I love you and you'll be out soon Until then here's a song to hold you over. It's it's the saddest

But funny a show on the planet. Yeah, so I found this interview with art LeBeau. It's amazing and this Goes through the history of like how he came to be and he became known as like the incarcerated. Yeah DJ and then he lets you know that in County they used to have the radio playing Yeah, and his show is was the only one they could leave on because both the blacks and the Mexicans Could look could tolerate it So in the LA County Jail a number of years ago. They they used to have a music playing that everybody could hear and they said that my show was the only one that but the Mexicans and the blacks

would tolerate Funny to hear because it's not like it's not inappropriate Is it more to say the Mexicans and the blacks but for some reason when he says it it sounds like yeah Just cuz he's old. Well, it's like someone it sounds like someone's talking about different breeds of dogs Right right the aphanpinscher and the Rottweilers yeah, by the way in San Quentin you can go and you can hear Well, you know, you can see what kind of people are there listening to Art Lobo here is I don't even know how like they brought they they broadcasting this inside San Quentin prison and Just try to keep tally of the you know, I'm saying it's because we haven't done

You know I'm saying it's in a while and I kind of I really kind of miss it. Yeah, I really miss you And they're you know, we used to have like like tallies where we keep count of you know, I'm saying and There was like there was a back-and-forth. I think there was a one time there was a guy Trying to remember who had the the record remember we were keeping records of it Yeah, there was my favorite was the shook night One. Oh, yeah, that guy was amazing. I'm not job day in my life. No, I'm saying I've been in and out of jail, you know Did a little bit

Man, I'm like You know The best part is that he said nothing and then he said, you know, and I'm saying yeah, that's the ultimate or we and then we discovered that That Dre starts that song with you know, he starts trading Let's you know, I'm saying There's there are so many good funny, you know, I'm saying and then there's a Japanese girls, you know, I'm saying. Oh, yeah I never had a job before my life until I start working for sure, you know in and out of jail You know, I'm saying did a little bit everything, you know, I'm saying now

I'm That is so good, that's my favorite, you know what I'm saying of all time. Yeah, and there's a lot of you know, I'm saying You know saying like this So many to go through But they're that's really one of the all time. That's my favorite. Yeah the timing the the absolute Nonsense the guy's saying nothing and then saying, you know, I'm saying and that's really the key to a great You know what I'm saying is to give absolutely no information and then affirm that That those are all the you don't say

It was a questionable travel call, you know, I'm saying it didn't go our way And they made a decent play, you know, I'm saying I had a good look on MC had a better look You know what I'm saying? So it was just yeah They made or they made one more plays and we did man. Yeah. Yeah, that's a lot I got a 2001 Chevrolet Suburban, you know what I'm saying Six months to put it together. I had it like just like two years now, you know, I'm saying Y'all know me. Y'all I'm saying truck time. Yeah. No, we got it. We know who you are You know I'm saying

You know I'm saying That tells you so much because You know, she doesn't speak English. So she's just mimicking the thing that she's like, what what is said a lot That'll make it sound like I know This thing that I English. Yes. Yeah. And so she listens to all this hip-hop and she's like, you know, I'm saying You know, I'm saying that's such a phrase that that stands out to how many phrases are there man Well, there is that there is that people forget about that's a little lesser known

Yeah, there's that and that too. Fuck me and my ass man was probably one of my all-time favorite your mom's house clips People like that It's so good the homeless guy The having ghosts gay sex, right? That was the title of the clip gay ghost raped by a gay ghost So good you're fucking me. You're fucking me, man. You're fucking me. You fucking feel good Don't you? Fuck with my ass man. Shit. Shit. Shit. Good sex. Yeah. Shit. He's having such a good time. Fuck with my ass, man Oh

Yeah, he's having such a good time in that clip like you can't help but join in and the good feelings No, the good fun. No, and I I used to say too that it kind of makes you Want to get fucked in the ass? Well I think it makes you question your own sex game. You're like, I need to start performing better Because I've never made you make these noises. I've never you've never said anything like that Yeah, he's having such an intense time. Yeah, it's so intense and there's nothing going on. That's the best part It just shows you the power of imagination, though. I bet you his real sex has never been that good No way, but his imaginary sex. Yeah. Shit feels good

Never, you know what I'm saying Right now. I don't know what you're saying. I don't know what you mean Um, I don't know what you're saying. So anyways, there's obviously There's a lot of them a lot of you know, I'm saying and You know, we celebrate them over the years over the years. There's there's been Quite a number of them. Um, yeah, check it out. You know, I'm saying it's a fear. You know, I'm saying You know, I'm saying You know, I'm saying check this out though. I'm throwing a motherfucking shout out to my man boss, man

You know, I should worry, but maybe you know, I'm saying straight west side to folk goes town a corns came bill Firmary Baby two three that so uh All right, so there's the setup now we're going inside san quentin prison And check out these they have a microphone. They're on the yard. A lot of dudes out there. You know what I'm saying And just check out check out what's going on San quentin walls, you know what I'm saying got all the homies over here doing it. You know what I'm saying You know, you see motherfuckers is locked up and ain't doing no better than this right now

You know, but motherfuckers trying to do our best out here, man Rest in peace. Let's go. What's up? The homies right here. You know what I mean? Send our love out to the people in the streets. You know what I mean? Keep your head up Much love. You just got out the hole, huh? Yeah, you just got out the hole We got the sun out, you know what I'm saying? Yep. I don't know if I've ever been locked down in the cage But you fucked up getting that little bit of food and shit. You know, it's all bad, you know This is as it gets, you know in the game. You feel me? Yeah I want to send a shout out to the homies speedy look at from the photo a rest in peace

We still think of you all the time home speedy. Yes, speedy love man. I was the homie down Out of the photo, you know, he passed away due to cancer. You feel me that shit catching up to a lot of people catching up Cancer catches up It's like it's This whole shout out culture it's its own Repertory it's its own language, you know, it'd be awesome If if there was a let's do a podcast of just shout out shout out. You know what I'm saying? Yeah

The whole podcast is just a shout out so it goes out to fee if you know I'm saying my dog And we could call the podcast we could call the podcast this goes out this goes out Is this two hours of shout outs? Yeah, it's like, what's up? All right, yo, uh, like a beat nut. He wants What's up? He says that out to to speedy look, you know what I'm saying? And uh, you know, he's still thinking about you and your sister, you know saying shout out And then we just we play a little bed of music underneath. You notice how loud their bed is so you can barely hear That's what happens when you produce things and Oh, you know trying to do it good trying to do it moving trying to keep it alive

That is so funny So I reached all our state goals What's happening homie? What's up homie? This is wicked. Hey from bodymore your lawnmower say represented that big bag mighty north there You know, we locked up, you know, but at the same time we got to keep our heads strong our minds strong You know, they stay focused, you know, these are the homeboys right here representing there. You got to keep it up one time You know, let it be known, you know, I can't stop won't stop All right, homie. Check this out, man

See a lot of people up in here. You know, they got a lot of things they want to say get off The best thing I can say there because out there in the streets, man Stay out of jail do the right thing be positive, man. Well, they're not saying at a jail because you're doing this Yeah What you just said about the volume of the music that's the problem with all of these videos that are like gangbanger They've been going through is that it's so hard to hear what they're saying because they insist on having the music up too high Did you send me um little fucking rascals? Yeah

Yeah, I found this this guy I did it's um Oh, yeah, yeah, so I just was like looking I was looking for art labo No, this came from the fact that you were like are there's no chicago rappers No gang gangs chicago gangs. Okay, we're talking about gangs and you were like, oh midwest gang So I was like, well chicago has crazy gangs. Yeah, this is a chicago rapper. Oh, oh, are you sure chicago gangbanger? Who became a rapper. Oh, right. Okay. So this is his interview You know, they do like our record labels like they interview the talent to let you know a little bit about them in their background So this is his like talent interview like his background

Well, who got me started in this rap game Was mr. Criminal from high power that fool you mean He showed love homie that fool really was only one that that took me seriously homie when I wanted to do this rap Shit ain't fucking I went out to meet him home and his music dog. Like I was feeling his shit homie I still am daughter. Maybe a wind guard on the mic would help too For your first beta publicity. It's terrifying. You know, I mean his rap shit mr. Criminal. It's terrifying. It's really crazy Mr. Criminal. That's a new one. You know, I haven't heard that one before

I like speedy. Yeah, that's the last one. That's because he goes so slow No, we're talking about, you know, wouldn't it be crazy if um, please if a girl because there's been a few athletes That had the first name mr. What if a girl was named mr? Yeah, we talked about this. Yeah, so that's a great idea This is a good idea. So check it out. You name the girl mr And then that way she's got to be mrs. Mr. And then you give her A guy's middle name too. Like frank, right? So it's mrs. Mr. Frank. Yeah, whatever Yeah, cigar. Sure. It's a really good idea It's pretty cool, right? Yeah

Hey, mr. Mr. Frank. Commands respect, you know Because you're going mister female male male. But what about other titles like dr. Esquire? Yeah Well phd miss or you could be mrs. Dr. Yeah, how about this respect mrs. Dr. Mr. Yeah, there you go. That's a perfect name. So So Mrs. Is the title her first name's dr. Her middle name is mr. Yeah, like Janet mrs. Jackson if you're nasty. Yeah Hello, is mrs. Ms.

Dr. Mr. Cigura here It's pretty good Wait, can I hear more of his interview though? Yeah, it's really good And fucking that's really who got me started home with mr. criminal doctor who showed me love homie and inspired me to wrap homie at fucking Whatever I talk about something way different homie, but but just how he was a real motherfucker from the streets and shit And a real motherfucker could appreciate that dog. So yeah, I mean mr. Criminal got me started Homie they're homie as you know, I'm saying. Yeah

Honestly, oh It ain't hard to see I'm a gang member dog And fucking she's got a rapper homie A lot of people use that as a way out homie Away to get away from this gang begging homie because this life ain't for everybody homie and motherfucker see that And that's why we got all kinds of fakes in this game We don't need you homie. You know what I mean? We could we could do better without you dog You make us look bad homie. There's only a handful of real motherfuckers in this game homie

And whether I'm a drug addict a gang member or a Chicago rapper homie I made my mark homie and I'm here to stay homie. Can nobody ever take my spot? Do you realize what he's saying? He's like a lot of I'm a I'm a gangbanger and a lot of people use rap to stop gangbanging, but I'm not gonna do that Right. I want I want to stay a gangbanger. I don't want to be a successful rapper instead. Well, he's saying that success A lot of times equals leaving this lifestyle. Why would you want to leave the lifestyle? If I were to be successful in this rap, you better believe I won't stop being a gangbanger. It's still gonna be a gangbanger

Okay. Yeah, like I'm doing I commit crimes because it's in my heart. It's in my joy. It feels good. Yeah feels right That's awesome, man That is really cool. It's a positive message. Yeah Oh for for the kids. Yep for the kids You know, it's but there's a lady who's been emailing me about um staying out of of jail Uh, we've had a couple of correspondences. I don't I don't you know, I don't want to say her name, but um And she's like, you know, I'm just so angry and all this stuff I don't make you got to stay the fuck out of jail. So this is dedicated to you homie this episode

Yeah, you want to hear some of this nonsense? Stay out of jail. Stay the fuck out of jail. That's the best advice anyone can ever give you Just stay the fuck out of jail stay out of jail, dude. It's not good. It's not good. Yeah Yeah, try I know and I know it's you're angry and it's hard but listen. Yeah speaking of clips people don't like You know, I give him the grease. Oh people hate it. No I tell him there Listen, I'm on his finger. Oh, it's fine. Stick it in his ass Sticking in his ass and you know, I'm saying kind of like fuck yourself So loosen yourself up. Oh my god. That that is a hard one. You know, I'm saying, you know

That's gotta keep it 100. Yeah, I do I hear you. I feel you dog. I know what you're saying You know what I'm saying? Get that prison shit going. All these cats will let you know the real man You know what I'm saying? Yep being in prison It ain't nice out here. Am I right though? It's not I want to let all the little homeboys know Let's go to school and get your education because if you don't you're gonna come here and get educated by us, huh? That's right, man Get on there right here homie. Yeah

Come to my hood right here. I appreciate what you're doing out here. You know, I'm saying Coming up talking to us. You're the voice of the people. You know, I'm saying you represent us It's out of control. We keeping the gangsta from drumming. Got you, man So the homeboys in song way on northern Cali represented right here, right? Let me tell you how much of the body of song song Okay, I can't hear you because your music bed's too loud so Um, that makes me laugh so hard. It's so true. It's unreal. It's such a rookie mistake to have it So loud you want to know the opposite of that? I want to play this for you

Good evening, this is Maria with you Today I wanted to play around with some fabrics I have picked out textured fabrics It's fabric whispering and we're going to So weird. So weird. It's going to tap She touches fabrics and whispers Scratched them just like a youtube channel a little bit

I kind of like it This feels gentle. Yeah, the beauty of color Gentle materials and you think it's is it different you think what does she look like? Is it a different like a different feel than coming up talking to us? You're the voice of the people, you know what I'm saying? What does she look like? You just see her hands touching fabrics. Oh, it's you don't get to see her face I think you're like nice cute blonde lady. Let me see. Oh, that's ridiculous. This is oh So she's literally got like swatches of fabrics and then she whispers and whispers and then touches them so

It's the weirdest thing this is weirder than any sex. What is this a sex thing? I don't know that it should must be It's just like a pleasure thing. I get the textile Yeah, tactile thing rather This is so fucking weird. I love it and all my ears. I don't think I've ever seen anything this weird I thought it was so bizarre and it's not dirty. It's just weird You know, yeah Like this is up there with that guy having sex with a horse. We're like, that's weird No, no, that's that's different. That's dirty. It's dirty, but it's this is weirder

This is weirder than a guy fucking a horse. Yeah, I saw a video or a lady blew a dog and then it mounted her I watched it this weekend. It's really gross I bet you feel glad I saw a guy fucking a tailpipe in the video in brazil Really? Have you seen that video? No, it's a guy with his dick and a tailpipe of a car and he's humping it It's the stupidest thing you've ever seen. Well, you know shout out to that guy Got to the dicks of the tailpipes in brazil, Rio, Sao Paulo, you know what I'm saying? Represent You know what I'm saying?

You know what I'm saying? um Should we get into this because it's kind of Tremendous. Hold on. Can you press pause for a moment? Yeah, I I'm starving. I have to eat a song. Really? I am crazy. You're live. Don't forget. Yeah, hold on a second guys. Okay. I just need to grab like a piece of All right, we're back. Um, you got uh Some cashews in this bitch. Could you not do apricots, please? Oh my god. How excited are you about that? That was fucking terrible. I started eating a dried apricots from traders joe

I love the taste of them, but they're lethal Like I you fart I fart rather like hot Just so hot and steamy Yeah, and so smelly like I think those are smelliest farts. I've ever had Yeah, those were pretty bad farts. What's the smelliest? What makes you fart the smelliest? Fart the smelliest. Mmm. That's a good question. What causes you to fart the smelliest

Somebody has wrote I'm dressed like a Jedi Just for fun. Uh, yeah, yeah, um, I don't know man. That's There's things that really I mean garlic farts are always, you know, like if you eat a lot of garlic Yeah, but for you personally, I feel like meat you get meat farts Yeah beef fart like when you have steak, you know, like just a big cut of steak, it's like Oh, yeah, hard boiled eggs. Yeah, that makes you fart pretty bad, but you personally Yeah, I'm trying to think what's the we'll we'll think about it. We'll marinate on that Yeah, you don't just jump into that answer without giving it some

You were about to make a big announcement. You're about to oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, let's see if this has this the thing They're telling me here Let me see That's the new ASAP Rocky every day they give a pimp squad holding it down Look like Nice love to see Donna Godot getting hers Um, yeah, it's pretty cool. Good to see your mom's house getting incorporated into the popular culture. Hello Oh

Chips in a bowl, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, so this weekend twice once in Nashville and once in Asheville and first let me Say thank you to everybody that came to see me in chat nougat uh What's the city nashville and Asheville, North Carolina Amazing crowds wonderful people. Thank you all for coming twice First in nashville after a show a woman comes up to me

And i'm like taking pictures and meeting people and she goes Can I lick your butthole? And I said excuse me. Mm-hmm. And she said can I lick your butthole? And I go, uh Oh, and then it hit me like And then her husband goes, I'm sorry. What did you say to him? And she goes I asked if I could lick his butthole and he goes, I hope you don't And she said why he goes because it's our anniversary and I go, oh

Oh, it's not for real and she goes. No, I really will I will Anyways, she's an insistent I'm like and I go it's not clean right now and she goes go clean it up I go, we're at the club. Where am I going to clean it? Yeah Then in ashville a nice lady comes up to me a nice lady and she said She goes, hey, I'll lick your butthole And I go really and she goes I can't be the first person that told you that today. I go you are And then her husband or boyfriend was like see babe like you're the first one. That's awesome

And they were really behind it And then I hadn't checked the email accounts in a while, but you told me You know, they started to flood in and it's it's pretty exciting stuff I gotta tell you that Uh, subject line tom's butthole. Yeah was a huge. I mean the inbox was flooded Let me show you a few if you're just you're looking on periscope. You can see Tom's butthole. Tom's butthole hot topic. Yeah, there's quite a few Would you like me to read some of the tom's butthole emails? Yeah

You know, uh, what's interesting is that a lot of these were submitted from men Overwhelmingly, which is weird. I thought I tried to make it pretty clear That we really wanted to kind of eliminate the dudes on this one Well, that's what you got a lot of dude licks. So The first one was actually from a girl. She said yes, there's no way I'd go near tom's butthole There aren't enough antiseptic wipes in the world to make that Thing even remotely tempting

Like it all the way, come on Yeah I'm a 31 year old male American married straight living in singapore the past six years in response to your poll There is no chance. I'd ever lick tom's butthole, but with all due respect. I think it would be pretty funny to spit on it You'd probably get a good clean wipe after that. Thanks, dude. That's interesting. What a neat perspective, huh? Um, can I read you one? Yeah, please sure. There's neil neil writes I'm not too sure why christina has a hard time believing that jennifer anison lick tommy the main mommy's butthole

In a parking lot in 99 She totally looks like the kind of girl that's into it, especially if tom put a bit of jiff on the rim first I'd even I'd even be willing to go as far as to guess that aniston Would be even would be into some role playing say as a mentally disabled butthole liquor that's choosy in her type of peanut butter Keep your jeans high and tight neil. Thanks neil So that was a good one and then we have one that's just outright. Yes I do it, but I am a dude so I wouldn't want to do anything that would make tom uncomfortable So there's you know, here's here's awful. That's really nice. Here's a taker is what I'm saying the offer's there

Guy from nebraska says he would lick your butt and he's totally straight What is it because he thinks of it as uh Just fine. Well, he goes the reason I can both maintain my heterosexuality and lick tom's butthole is because I do not view it as a sexual act It's basically nothing more than helping out a friend and having a good time in my opinion When it comes to tongue punching a fart box It's not any more sexual than hugging your friend Holding his hand or kissing his cheek in some cultures All of these things are completely normal for hetero dudes to do with one another

Yeah, as a as a citizen of earth. I accept cultural differences and internalize them. There you go. There you go What do you think of that jeans? Here's another one. I got to say that only due to the fact that I am married I would not lick tom's butt. I'm a dude and I ain't gay But I'm a huge fan and I feel like it would be a great experience I feel like he would be considered enough to wipe down and maybe chlorox wipe the brown off before the deed This one I like this is actually from a woman which is kind of neat She writes a little bit about myself I am a msc phd candidate

I don't want to say the university and the clinical psychology brain behavior and cognitive science programs So she's a smart lady. I'm also an introvert belonging to the intj classification and the renowned Myers-Briggs personality assessment Jesus this is a pretty bright lady. She's very smart. She says rim jobs are my release From the daily monotonous grind of writing research papers in the professional and ultra conservative laboratory I would do the same for Christina Though the shit-to-shower tendency is a bit disconcerting. Yeah, that's a bit so But she's an introvert. She's a smart lady and she she thinks rim rim jobs are her release from daily So and somebody just wrote on periscope rim jobs are the best. They're the best. There you go

Um One woman would do it too. No disrespect, but I would human centipede tom's brown eye And that was just a straight out offer too straight offer. Yeah another guy writes in Uh, I personally would not indulge in the lush forest of tom starfish I'm so i'm gay and I don't rim. What kind of gay guy are you? Jesus no the program step it up, dude But this guy writes I met a girl recently who definitely would I had a one night stand shameful I know and she went down on me and before I could blink twice

Her tongue became the mayor of brown town There's nothing in life more surprising than an unexpected tongue in the ass. I didn't really enjoy it as I I had not been eating or cleaning well in the prior few days when she came up to kiss me again I felt more like a rape victim than a consenting adult having a one night stand So they're out there tom keep your chin up Thanks I think just your butthole is what i'm concerned with the the level of hair and I know what you do in the bathroom. I've smelled it. I've heard it

Yeah, I just know what the amount of activity that comes out of there I just like that, you know your hair ain't gross I like that people People kind of you know volunteered themselves and I like that because from now on You will be my toilet slave. Do you understand? So anytime my stomach gets full That'll be the time you can prove yourself to me You're gonna get down on your hands and knees and prove that you're the sole ultimate

slave worshiper And you're gonna worship me And you're gonna beg for my juicy Juicy dirty butthole I'm gonna open up my cheeks just like this Right on top of your mouth And i'm gonna tell you to suck that brown Poopy shit out of me. Do you understand?

We understand. Yep. Thank you um speaking of Harry and gross I received um of a video of a man who claims What are you doing? Nothing? What are you doing? I was looking at the thing on But what were you doing you were I was making the hearts go up my nose You want them to see it's in your nose

No, the hearts that are going up. They went up my nose. It's so stupid You love this app. Yeah, I do Um, we got some minute a video of a guy who claims to have um over a minute long fart Yeah, I know a minute long fart. It was like a I don't know but there's There's obviously that this is something you got to question The validity of it. Yeah. Well in this day and age, it's like You know, anybody can kind of manufacture that and well, that's one of the criticisms people have about king ass ripper

You know, and I don't think it's valid Uh, just because of the sheer volume of work that king ass ripper puts out His dedication to the game Yeah, um, you can sometimes see the fluttering in in the shorts You can hear the sound Definitely been worn down by a lot of farts, but the other thing is that um I don't I don't think it's a lot. Well people think that king ass ripper uh

manufactures the farts um Because like that there's there's edits between his farts So they're saying that he puts an air tube In his butthole that air up in there and then he farts it out, but what he'd do that would hurt I don't I don't he might not be mentally. Well, I'm not sure I can't believe he refused our offers. We have offered him money cash now cash money And he refuses to know

He won't even acknowledge our existence. That's how above us. He is king ass ripper. I know doesn't it kind of like you're like, what? Well, but that's why I was kind of like should we give this new farder a chance should we listen should we this is the um Let me see because he has a He also has a what's it called like an aka. Yeah, he like mr. Farts or something the fart master the fart master. Yeah But do you think this is He's laying on his back up to a microphone I don't know if it's real They're saying all hail the king

And Notice there's no there's no break in the fart right there. It sounds like it was about to end but it continues Right now we're at 20 seconds I don't buy it We're at 30 seconds right now I don't think it can be real it's not possible 40 seconds. It's not possible It's fake 50 seconds it's fake

I like that the this the fart master guy he wears a mask so you can't see him and he goes like this He can't see like the magic man. Yeah, he can't see his identity See the thing with king asperger why I think his are real and this guy's aren't is because king King doesn't really go for length of fart. It's always about power. It's about um Quality over quantity You know this guy's just going for a length and that to me is the sign of kind of a dilaton farder Somebody who's not really in it for the love of the game There's by the way, you're right. I agree with you on that. Thank you

The very first comment on this long fart is it is 100 fake. Yeah, and then there's a debate underneath it He made noises with his mouth. No one does a minute long farting without shitting themselves. Yeah, it's too long I think just oh he comments. That's great Well, what does he say? He says i'm not quite sure how any video on this topic could convince you otherwise I take it you have experience of farting for a minute and shitting yourself um If I answer this in description of the video, why are you asking like he he's trying to tell you I breathe several times in the video

Those are the hardest times because you have to adjust how hard you're pushing Producing long farts like this is difficult because it's a real balance between Consistency and duration. I mean this guy thinks it's very Now he now i'm you know I wish we could we get a hold of it. Well, maybe we can reach out to the fart master. Yeah And just see what his techniques are what he's thinking. Yeah Because here here's the thing. Is it possible that somebody could have a minute long fart? Yes, it's possible. Is it probable? Yeah, I mean, what's the longest fart you've ever let you think? I mean

Actually, the longest fart is your mother's that I've heard when your mom farts. Those are like 20 second farts But I don't even think but I don't think even really 20 seconds I think it's like it feels that way. Yeah, but in reality like here's like I think she might have hit 10 to 12 Here's five seconds one two Three I think she said five like that's a long fart five seconds is long really long. Yeah I know in her life. I've heard probably 10 to 15 Second ones a few and also the when your mom does long ones. They kind of the sound modulates like this

Like it goes through Levels peaks and valleys Yeah Yeah, I mean, you know another thing we could probably do we try with king asher, but what if we reach out to The fart master. Yeah Just see if he's open to Talking to us explaining his technique speaking of Reaching out

Look, um, we gave it we gave it it's uh It's been weeks now. It's been weeks and we're kind of you know a little frustrated So we're gonna ask Um, you guys, you know, we we spoke to gloria stefan Um a couple weeks ago a couple weeks ago and we're waiting to hear back about If she wants to do this, um This song together and and basically a bunch of other songs Anyways, she hasn't responded. So you want to play a little bit of the song so that those who don't know it

Come on check your body baby do that come I know you can't control yourself any longer feel the rhythm of the music getting stronger Don't you party? So you get you know a little bit of the idea of the way that's the miami fart machine um, so gloria's Twitter handle is at gloria stefan. That's G l o r G l o r i a stefan. E s t e F a n all one word acloria stefan

Please send her a tweet and say What's Are you going to do the miami fart machine? Will you release? miami fart machine songs Um, you know, we're all waiting to hear and I think if we can get her, you know, maybe a few hundred tweets like that She'll be able to she'll have more incentive to respond. So

Please tweet her What's up with the miami fart machine? Will you put out some more fart singles? Yeah, I'm don't be rude obviously because we do want to yeah, we want to work with her. So please be nice to her She was really sweet on the phone with us. She was very understanding and sweet But I do feel like it's been a long time and she's being a bit evasive Yeah, what are you laughing at? Somebody wrote she'll just hate you and I don't think that's true. She'll hate me. Yeah, I don't think she'll hate us Why would she hate us? She loved us on the phone. She loved our song. She seemed really supportive. We're just trying to get an answer

That's all if the answer is no, it's just tell us no. Yeah, give us closure on it. I don't know why yeah like It's just it's just feels kind of like we're in limbo and I really want to get this project rolling You know, we've got a lot going on with our pilot right now and which by the way was just um press release today Yeah, that's pretty exciting. Yeah, really exciting guys. True TV released a press statement saying The pilot order is official. Mm-hmm. So that's cool. Uh, we'll shout out to your mom's house. Yeah A little shout out to your mom's house. It's just exciting. Yeah Yeah, so tweet gloria. Let's um, let's get her to fucking make a move

Otherwise, we're just gonna have to take it somewhere else It's true, you know Yeah, we want her to have the opportunity Oh Yeah It's really good. It's a really good song. I think it's a natural fit for her. I mean Yeah, what's she doing now that's really speaking to this generation like like that Yeah, I mean

To me, that's this generation. That's That's what you know, the Miley Cyrus is are doing the Taylor Swift to the world Whoever's relevant. That's what they're doing. Yeah, they're farting. They are farting. No It's pretty true. Speaking of farts. You found a new place to take road dumps Yeah, I I did. Um Well, it's uh, what's it called cracker barrel? Yeah, not craten barrel. I thought you said craten barrel. Oh, here's why Okay, I've been doing a couple of these little tours. Yeah, where There's a lot of driving and

A lot of times you want to shit And you know You're driving and you go, where do I want to take a shit somewhere in peace? Yeah, I think somewhere clean and decent and A lot of fast food joints. It's like it's the worst. I've I've done mcdonald's it's not preferable I've done in and out not preferable starbucks even I mean it just they smell like And it's varies. I mean, there's a lot of the dumps taken At starbucks, you know, it's a dump factory people are

Hitting their coffee and then they're shitting sometimes they're not as clean But here's what I want to tell you about okay Cracker barrel it's kind of like these Family oriented things where like they appeal to families, you know, it's it's that's that's who they're kind of going after And because of that they have to they maintain a little better image They clean them all the time every time I've gone in there. It's a clean bathroom. I feel like they Clean it hourly I think what you've really touched upon

Is that most people aren't shitting at the cracker barrel necessarily? Yeah, not necessarily and and here's the thing the layout is the same. So here's the deal with cracker barrel you walk in and there's a There's a bullshit store or they sell bullshit store ornaments ornaments t-shirts Just a bunch of dumb shit. I love it the dumb shit that they sell DVDs all kinds of nonsense. I've gotten you some Christmas ornaments your seminal

uh team Christmas ornaments there Someone's saying they disagree. I I disagree with you. Okay Um Bathroom is always a beeline from the front door. Sometimes somebody will stop you, you know an employee You'll be like, oh, can I help you find something? And what do you say? What's your cover? You go? I'm just looking right now and they're like, well, let me know if I can help and you go. Yeah, okay And that's fine And I do like kind of like I look I look up and around like oh, this is interesting. I touch something

I go right in there clean bathroom Take my dump in peace and then I uh, you know I I walk out And then they go, did you find what you're looking at? I yeah, I I didn't find it right now I'm actually you know, my my family's coming right now. So I'm gonna wait outside for them and you leave Yeah, I mean common common better than dumping at burger king Well, common knowledge would have you go to the gas station But we all know that is the worst possible place to stop for the road

Never pay your shit and gas station absolutely to horrendous. You're much better off at a mcdonald's or a subway Yeah, actually the subways are pretty good, too Yeah, but I thought you meant creighton barrel and you've shitted creighton barrel Creighton barrel is great to shit at yeah, but how many are you going to find right off the highway when you're driving? Not many no, I'll tell you where I was really surprised that it was unpleasant to shit at Was was at nordstrom we were at or macy's remember we were at the mall really at the department stores macy's I believe usually that's a good. It's a good look. I was so upset I had to really shit because I had some high fiber cereal

And the guy on the floor goes. Yeah, just make a right. There's the bathroom right there and it was one Bathroom like one toilet. What do you do? There's no shower there. I mean do you use the sink? That's what people are asking Well in that case is not my first dump of the day the only one that I go I go shit the shower on is my first crap of the day because that one i'm going to shower anyways And you can dry your butthole with the hand dryer Oh

You guys are really immature, you know, yeah Yep, really immature immature about sure Yeah, are you done? You're gross you do gross things you're gross So the point is I finally found a multi staller at the macy's but they smelled like horrific dumps

Like why does a department store try it? It's a department store. It shouldn't smell that bad It's not like a fucking airport like lax Yeah, I always feel like I mean, you know I think it's kind of logical right in a way that like if you go to a high end place It's going to be like a hotel lobby of like a really nice hotel. That's a prime great place to ship Yeah, yeah, I really you're in a big city walking around you got a shit You know like you're in new york and you see like the four seasons go there walk in there

Yeah, we did that one time I forget what city we were in and I and I go I got a shit And then uh, I was like, let's go to the four seasons because they're never going to question you the fart seasons Sorry the fart season Nobody's going to question you they're not gonna be like ma'am. Are you going just to shit in our lobby? Because they have to be polite to you because they're the fart seasons, right? Right. Yeah, they can't I got I was in a city Um

Where I was looking I wanted a recommendation. I think of somewhere to eat I was walking by a really nice hotel. I walked in the walked up to their concierge And then acted like I was a hotel guest. Oh, yeah, but you have to just do it confidently You know, you go hey, I was wondering I was looking for um, you know, like a sushi place like oh absolutely, sir And I pull out their map and they're like, yeah, there's this place and this place and like wonderful. Thank you I'll see you later. Of course. It's great. You know what's interesting I was looking at my my friend works for the fart seasons as like a reservation specialist And um, she goes look at this location in hawaii or whatever and I was looking at it. It's so goddamn expensive

It's like $600 a night and one of the features for this hotel It features a beanbag toss area for you and your family I'm like really is that the big selling point in hawaii for you and your shitty family your beanbag toss I guess that's $600 of a beanbag. That's so much money. It's so much money. Yeah. It's crazy. It's so crazy For a beanbag toss get y'all like, you know, I want Little threads In a shape of flowers, it's so soothing. I love it Yeah

There's number four Would you want her to touch your pina this way? Yeah. Well, she her hands are so nice But she's just like gliding over them Now there's a girl's penis. I work Oh, please do that. Your penis It's so soft It's veins Testicles are hairless

Freshly shorn. Now just Very gently around the corners Okay, very gently touch the number six. That's so bizarre. Just wash just clean this Beautiful red higher red Why the soft talk I wonder What's the thing? I don't know. It's definitely a thing. She can't just be like and this red this red fabric is so pretty Just say it

That's a thing that is a thing She had they had to put soft voice With fabric touch like somebody specifically requested. Yeah, those two things together. It's so weird Humans are so fucking weird, man It's very interesting Speaking of interesting, I got a great text message from my friend Eric. I don't know if you want to hear this of jim Um, this one was so ridiculous. I had to copy and paste it and talk about it So this is from my genius friend Eric. Um ever go to wipe and sneeze and fart in your hand

wipe And sneeze and sneeze and fart in your hand Do you say you're wiping and then you sneeze but then you fart in your hand instead? Yeah, that's pretty That's very Pretty good. That happened to him So he's wiping he sneezed and he farted in his hand. Yeah, wow, that's that's pretty cool. Wow Can we name that?

Yeah, what is that called a snarf a snarf? Yeah, it's like a misdirect You think you should but he didn't pull his hand up fast enough. I guess Right to cover his mouth and then he farted in his hand Well, he got a farted in his hand and then went instinctively to his you don't want to do that. That's not good. It's horrible Dude, what this says that Joe Rogan and red band Wipe while they're standing up I do that you stand up to wipe. Yeah, how do you sit and wipe? It's like what are you scooching up and you wipe? What?

Yeah, of course What do you mean? Well, how do you stay perfectly seated and then wipe it would get all over your arm and your hand You don't reach back and just wipe like that. Sometimes I can't like I kind of have to lean forward. I've stood I stand they stand sometimes I stand sometimes I lean forward Why? I stand a lot to wipe because then that's how you get a real clean That is not weird. Why why is everything I do weird. It's not it's not weird

Joe does it and brian. It's not that weird. I'm gonna call Joe. No No, no Wipe gates This is an extension of wipe gate who the fuck stands to wipe I do I don't see the problem. What's the problem? That's how you get a real clean That's how I get the toilet paper in there fully. I look at the toilet paper. I examine it make sure there's no remnants Yeah, but you could just lean your you lean up and your butt opens sometimes

Sometimes yes, sometimes I just feel like I need to get in there more and I stand You don't feel that sometimes like ah, this is not a sitter. This is a standard. I got to stand and get in there No, I stood last night. I think The fuck is happening. No, who did I marry? What's going on with you? Yeah, I thought you showered after you poop. What are you standing for? Here's a here's the difference guys So the morning the morning shit. Yeah is straight to shower. Absolutely every time pretty much without Without unless I'm you know unable to it's morning dumps. I go straight to shower However, if I take a second or third dump of the day in the afternoon

That's a standing wipe because I usually don't have a butt stamp. I don't have the crayon thing happened to me I don't know who you are. I don't know anything about you What are you talking about? It's me tom It's me It's your jeans. I'm the same jeans the brown jeans. I've always had on that fur angel You know, do you believe we're getting another dog this weekend? Are you excited? Yeah, we're getting another dog This weekend

We're turning into those people. We are and we're getting the same breed a purebred Little fart little girl to accompany here. Look at our fur angel. So cute. He's the best It's just we have a little doggy bed in here in the podcast room and he He always comes in here when we record and he lays down in his little bed and side balls us Yeah, he's the best dog Oh, oh, he's posing he's lifting his leg So we're gonna get a girl dog this weekend a little puppy

Uh, so that this dog will be raised right not like our Delinquent son. No, they said is it gonna be is it gonna be rudy huckstable? We wanted to originally that was the plan about I don't know about 50 rapes ago That was the plan Right. It really was we wanted to name our all of our animals after cosby kids and then cosby kind of ruined that So now no, it won't be rudy. Should we announce the name or not yet? Why not? I don't see the problem Go ahead with the name. Well, you know, we have a fiefal. We're gonna name her bacon bit, but call her bitsy. That's right. She's bacon bit

and She's gonna be go. She's gonna go by bitsy Well, what but we'll see sometimes you think, you know Yeah, sometimes you think, you know what the dog is But then, you know, it doesn't sound right when you say it or it doesn't, you know, it doesn't resonate with a dog Yeah, because Theo originally when we adopted him his adoption certificate says doctor huckstable That is what we originally thought we were gonna call this dog was doctor huckstable Right. And we did consider sondrachelli the dressmaker from my big fat gypsy wedding

Sondrachelli is a great name for a dog. Sondrachelli is pretty good. She's the gypsy dressmaker Well, look, it's the it's still open bitsy isn't uh, somebody said you could call her bitsy shore She could start a dog comedy scene That's funny. Um But I mean it's still open if you guys have any great suggestions fiefal fiefal and bitsy kind of goes together It's kind of cute nonsensical names sondrachelli. I do like sondrachelli is great Yeah, it's so random too. Like unless you're a fan of that gypsy wedding show, you won't even know who sondrachelli is It's it's kind of I I always I'm kind of amused by like really human names for dog like sondra for a

It just sounds so silly to me because it's it's you know, it's so human. Yeah, it's like michael Like what if we named like yeah, michael or rick Steve it's so funny to call dogs like people's names. Yeah, it's Um, but I think doesn't sickler have that joke about yeah, kevin kevin. Hey kevin. Yeah, your roommate's like that's my cat man That's right, right kevin kevin's a funny dog name Yeah, you don't need too many people with them We could call it someone said you call it red band and then people then brian will just get confused I don't understand

Name her kathie lee gifford kathie lee gifford. That's pretty funny. It's pretty funny. I like kathie lee kathie lee giver. I don't like kathie lee enough though You know, I love sondra sondra. We like sondrachelli because she's always trying to work with these gypsies gypsy dresses Yeah, I don't know if I can do it in time. I mean, what do you how do you want it? I want a rail blank out I want people to be like fuck. I never seen a dress like that before She's like, I'll do my best. Yeah, and then she's always like this dress has the most bling of any dress we've ever made Every single dress is the blingiest dress Yeah, this dress is the holiest. I can't believe how horny these dresses are too. It's so crazy

Fucking animal. They look like total sluts, man. And I know they're not, you know, but It's such a weird culture. Yeah, it's so gross God, there's such a zero trash like me I'm looking at you. Somebody sent us a song dude. That wasn't a song The song was just a video Um, or just like the video laid over a music bed. It's not a song You're very upset by that. Well, yeah, you can't call it a song I mean kathie lee gifford for a dog is pretty funny

Um, I'm not patty stanger. We like patty Yeah, patty stanger patty stanger is a great name for a dog. It's a good idea. I like that one Jeff Lewis How about we were thinking of um, mrs. Padmore Remember we were gonna give her a downturn name Yeah Or lady Grantham Lady Grantham's lady Grantham's still on the table lady Grantham is a pretty good one

Because she is bougie. She's from a breeder. We're not going to the shelter for this dog We've already paid our karmic debts with rescuing fief and that was a lot of drama That was a lot of drama This dog we're gonna raise from from puppy hood And she's got a good lineage and stuff. She's she's my real bougie. I don't know how fief's gonna take to her Yeah, she's gonna be real fucking bougie. Yeah They have really opposite upbringings these two um

Yeah, so Let's hear these uh, there's a few song submissions That we can give a listen to if you want to hear them, please Let's hear. Okay Um What's this one Somebody said they I made this song after a night of

Drinking down heavy drinking Um What is that that was um Hey guys huge fan of your work I consider myself a missionary spreading the great word of ymh particularly through farts Uh, my brother submitted a garth brooksong You guys ended up playing on the podcast a few months back. Oh good. I've attached a gem that I believe compliments Work of this last episode. Here we go

Oh Holy shit, that was real. That was good. That was real. I feel like that was real Okay, dude garth's instagram. So what was the garth song we played we played a garth submitted song. Mmm. I'm sure I like that Oh, right. Maybe it was I like that Are you thirsty? Another song from matt. I want to breastfeed you You German man very thick nipples

Like dog nipples like thick juicy ravaged Come on with your thirsty I want to breastfeed you Big nips All for you. It's so creepy in german I want to breastfeed you. This is the german nipples here on this big nips All of it I want to suck me dying. So my favorite part is that that real german sound is like

That's great He's keep flicks his nipples. He's like, I'll use thirsty It's so funny That's so great. Could you feel like he's gonna make you suck his nipple? Come on with your thirsty Everything sounds filthy in german doesn't really have the accent like would you like some lemon cookies? Does the donut just so sweet and tasty That's really good Matt. That's how you do it, man. That's a really good song. Yeah Um

Yeah, I'm impressed I'm impressed. Suck on these back naps I mean That was a special one too It's all for you. They're still um, it's all for you don't Still sending in art labo things. Oh, you know, I'm dying to hear if you guys can actually find One of the dedications I'm talking about where he's so ridiculous And it's like these gang banger names and stuff

I would love to hear a real one recorded that we can play on the show You know, yeah, it's like it's it was impossible to find. I kept looking and looking But really dumb one would be great All right Let's wrap it up Look at your beard. I got my eyebrows flicked yesterday. Did they look at super fleekified? Thank you. Yeah Thank you. Jamal and roberts mi hei mi hei

um All right, look i'm starving. Let's go eat lunch. What are we gonna have whatever you want? Okay Uh, what are you? Uh, can you show mommy? Yeah? Let's get you on this. I'm not looking good right now guys. You look great. Mommy hasn't showered. Mommy hasn't washed your face There you are you're on Got my cashews Hi guys i'm looking tired Oh

Hi tina. Hi mommies What song do you want to hear to go out? um Oh, can we hear oh my gosh Oh, sure because we just found that yesterday the original video of that girl Yeah, and uh, she's so great. Yeah Oh my gosh Oh my gosh

All right, here we go. We love you. Thanks for listening. My jeans visit thousand ranch dot com tom segura dot com for my live show dates And tickets and your mom's house podcast dot com Thanks for listening. We love you. Check it out. Here it is. Oh my gosh Oh my gosh Oh my gosh Oh my gosh Oh

Oh Oh That's not bad not bad at all not bad at all