Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - 556 - Cesar Millan - Your Mom's House with Christina P and Tom Segura

Episode Date: June 17, 2020

SPONSORS: - Go to WHOOP.com and enter “YOURMOM” at checkout to save 15% - Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code MOMWW at Manscaped.com. - Get a 4-week trial PLUS free postage AND a digital scale without any long-term commitment at stamps.com and use the code word "MOM" - See how much you can save by re-shopping your home insurance rates at Policygenius.com - Try Fitbod for free for one month when you sign up today at Fitbod.me/mom It's a whole white baby bruh, and it's a whole new episode of Your Mom's House. This week, Tom Segura and Christina P take a look at clips from the new crime-thriller documentary on Netflix: "Garth Brooks: The Road I'm On." They also explore a vintage Fedsmoker video, in which Conald conducts a traffic stop on a government official! They also revisit YMH All-Star Robert Paul Champagne's premium content account to show just how much value you're getting with a subscription! They compare his content to other content creators. Which accounts bring the most value to their viewers?? YMH-regular Josh Potter joins the main mommies on the couch to discuss some current events. Several male "workers" have come out with allegations against Senator Lindsey Graham and his "ladybugs." Cool Guy actor Nacho Vidal is also in the news after being charged with a toad-licking ritual gone wrong! They also dive into Josh's recent experience having his house cleaned, which there's a video of on this very channel. Cesar Millan is a dog trainer, widely known for his Emmy-nominated television series "Dog Whisperer." He joins Todd and Christine to discuss his early life, how he began training dogs, working with Oprah Winfrey, things that affect a dog's energy, and much more. Cesar also lends his opinions on pup play, pony play, and the cool gal that lets wolves lick the inside of her mouth.

Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Hello, this is Captain Marcel. My sister went down. I'm going down to the mountain. All right, well go and get her and then come back. I miss Captain Marcel. Captain Marcel, she's been a little less active on TikTok. Really?

Yeah, she's been having a slow time in the quarantine. That happens. It affects people in different ways, but always remember if your sister goes down in the mountain, go get her. Bye, I'll be back. My sister. Yeah.

This is going to be really fun today. This is going to be so, so good. I got to tell you that we didn't sleep much last night because our four-year-old slept in the bed with us, but I woke up fresh as a daisy, so excited for life because of the guest that's coming in today. I know, it's wild. And I've trained two dogs using his methods.

And I have so many questions for him. I know. I can't wait, I really can't wait. He's a true hero. He is, he's a great guy, I'm really excited. And yeah, we're going to have a really good time. Yeah. We're going to have a good time.

I'm excited, I'm amazed. There's some amazed things to watch before we even get to him. There's so much in our world going on right now. There's a lot. Why don't we go ahead and cut the BS. And oh, and a reminder to go to my YouTube. We've been shooting a lot of content.

It's all in different streams and places. So there's on the main, your mom's house YouTube channel last week or a couple of weeks ago, you probably saw Josh Potter's place. There's another one that's been added since then. We're also adding things on our IGs. There's YMH cartoons. You can find them either on the main page

or on the clips page. But I also started putting some content that I put on my IG on my personal YouTube page. So my personal YouTube page is YouTube slash Tom Zagura. I have my Spanish podcast on there, but you can also find my stories from the road content there. Check it out, see if you like it, maybe you will. Can I do my vlogs too?

Yeah. I'd love to plug where my mom's at. If you're not aware of it, I've got a mom cast, a legit one for cool moms only. And it's really fun. That's on my own page. Okay. I got to milk you tonight.

You are just unbearable. I got to milk your nuts. Okay. So far, you didn't sleep too, you're tired. I actually think I'm in a good mood. Really? Yeah, yeah. You don't think so?

No, you're okay. I think I'm in a really good mood. Okay. Yeah. All right. You ready to go? Yeah, yeah, let's go. All right, let's do it.

Let's get started guys, here we go. No, no, no. Yeah. That's it, man! Who is Randy? Don't bring anyone loving to this. Don't burn my motherfucking stand! Welcome, welcome, welcome to your mom's house.

With Don Segura, Don Segura. Christina Pajitse, Christina Pajitse. Welcome to your mom's house. I'm so glad you played this opening clip because we watched this. Step into the mind of a killer. We watched. Yeah, we couldn't even, I couldn't get through it. I'll tell you why.

The level of bullshit, this guy spews. This reminds me of when people are behind a political candidate and you're like, you don't see how fucking insane this is. Which, yeah, are you referring to one in particular? And then you're like, you're on board with this? And they're like, yeah, that's great. Yeah. OK.

Like he has hosed so many people in this false sincerity, his intensity. And how does everything make you emotional? I don't know. I get it. If you have, you know, you go one time, my mom said this, and that memory elicits that emotion, and you go, well, it's a really sincere heartfelt moment.

It's a memory that does that to you. That's a natural thing. But if you start telling every story when I wrote this song, well, my dad said this, when I was at school, when I'm at my friend's night, and every thing you bring up makes you go like, yeah. One time I picked up a pen, and it was juicy, and I love juicy pans.

He does. He's crazy. Yeah, he's. I think, and I've been, there's so much going on in this documentary. I got to figure out who you're going to be. Oh my god. I really like that. So if you don't know what we're referring to,

there's a documentary on Netflix about Garth. It aired on another network first. Oh, OK. So they acquired it. They licensed it. So people may have seen this when it originally aired on, I don't know which channel it was that aired it originally. It came out like an A&E.

A&E. OK, it was the A&E doc series. And then Netflix, thankfully, acquired it so that we get to see it. And it is. There's so much going on. So first of all, the intensity of everything he's saying is what we were initially struck by. Yes.

He's on the verge of tears constantly. Now the cool thing is, because of the way the Netflix algorithm works, if you just watch a couple Ted Bundy things, it'll automatically play. It comes right after that, right before John Wayne Gacy. Here, let's check out a couple more things. It is so hard. He has to say.

It is. Then you know, if all hell breaks loose in the next five seconds from that handshake, and you turn, and you have to face something coming, you've got a partner, female or male. You've got someone you can count on. And people might go, what kind of shit are you talking about? Amen.

That's you. He's about to cry right there. I'll bet my life on it. What? I'll bet my life on it. Well, how about like when you shake, and then in the next five seconds, if some shit happens, that you need to help.

Are you being serious or something? What are you talking about? Yeah. You're a fucking country singer, right? Isn't he from like Oklahoma? Did shit go down there so much? If in the next five seconds, someone comes in here with a fucking machine gun,

I know you got my back, by the way. Oh my god. OK, there's a lot going on here. So let's go through, first of all, the teary delivery. Number two, everything he says sounds so rehearsed. There is not one spontaneous moment in this entire documentary of him just being like, oh. Well, everything has weight.

Everything's so heavy. Which means I feel like he was like, OK, I'll do your documentary. But I want to know exactly what you're going to ask beforehand. Like he wanted to know. I don't think he said I want to know. He's like, here's what you're going to ask me.

Here's what you're going to tell me. I'm going to tell you, yeah. Yeah. And then he's doing the Michelle Pfeiffer 90s movie. What's that one where she's teaching in the inner city and she sits down in the chair, the opposite. The AC Slater is what you kids call it. Dangerous Minds, The Backwards Chair.

Yeah. The AC Slater. It's good for thick boys. That's what I was thinking. Yeah, it's a good thick boy seat. It is. Flip it around and kind of get, yeah. That's what I was thinking, that he's concealing.

Oh, definitely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The weight, it's hard. A person's a really good athlete. He could throw stuff a mile. So he could throw a football, he could throw a javelin, he could throw a baseball, he could throw any implement. Look at him.

Further than anybody else. Athletics kept me in school long enough to go, hey. Are you going to cry? School is what you need. Jesus Christ. Why does that elicit emotion? I know. It's like he's on his period.

He's about to get his period any minute. School. Well, and not only that, if you'll notice, not nobody in his circle has a single negative thing to say. It's not even like, you know, Garth was messy. He was a messy roommate and not even, he could throw, he could kick, he could throw a javelin. He could walk on water, yeah, a mile,

he could heal the lepers. I mean, this guy is the next messiah. He could throw stuff, yeah. A mile. A mile. If you're a soldier, you need to work. Jesus Christ. If you're a boxer, you need an opponent.

And if you're in country music, you don't have to look forward to find who you're competing against. And you're competing against the other forms of music. So compete, compete, compete. And when you're done competing, compete again. What? It's country music. That's what you're doing if you're a musician.

You're competing against the other forms of music. No, you're not. But I think countries are very specific lane. Either you're into it or you're not, right? I'm so confused. Every day he goes, let's get in the studio and let's kick some raps ass and let's kick some fucking rock and roll ass with this song about my motherfucking truck.

Let's go. I mean, it is just so strange. Are you listening to Billie Eilish or are you listening to me? And also, the beard cut. As a bearded man, can you look at the cut of that beard and tell me that that's? It's shaped terribly. It's not flattering.

I mean, I love the get up for. The fire here, you know, like in his full. If you're a soldier, you need to work like a boxer. You're picking up trash on the side of the highway. Well, I guess he doesn't want to get hit. He doesn't want to get hit by any hunters. This guy is like bright. What the fuck is this outfit?

I don't know. And then he went there. He's like, this is my spot. Oh, my God. Need a little inspiration. Think something out. You need. He's talking about something.

Can I come here? I'll be on fire. Stop, stop. Because remember, he goes, I like to, this is where I grew up. He does look like he's a savant in this photo. Like this frame right here. He's about to be like, I dropped 263 to picks on the ground. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, also in that first episode, he's like, you guys think you've worked at music before? This is rehearsal for the tour. He goes, get ready. You've never done music like this. And they're like, we're just, I play drums. I'm a sound guy.

Like what you talking about, man? You've never played fucking music like this. I'm doing your lights. Very nice. So if you notice that time on the start, here they come. This is big thing. There should be somebody peddling in with this mean ass. Right off that top.

And we're doing this, bong, dong, dong. We need to keep all those chords. So you can't tastefully play bong, bong, just set. I need you to finish it, bong, bong, bong. So let's just get it bigger, fuller, meaner, stop in there, okay? Man. Yeah.

But wait, but my favorite is when he still plays Humble Pie. Like he's not a multi-millionaire, billionaire guy. And he's like, I just, my favorite place to be is where I grew up on this piece of shit farm in the middle of the home. I like to- Set a fire and you can think about all things running through your head.

All these rappers out there making money. I want to kill every one of them with their chains and their fancy rides. Fuck. Yeah. I got a new song. Beep-ba-ba-ba-boop, beep-ba-boop. And do you think he deliberately wears

like crappier clothing? Like he does not fucking wear- No, no. I bet in the house he's like, cameras outside. Go get me that Ford shirt. Throw in my Ford emblem. Yeah, there's no way.

Hey, y'all. Such a fuck. Wait, and my- You're not like that. I don't know, man. You guys. Yeah. My daddy woke up every day and his lyrics too.

And he's talking about my daddy. My daddy woke up every morning for work. Like, asshole, most people's dads wake up every day for work. Every time he says what daddy did, he told me. Yeah. You're gonna have to work hard. Yeah, all right. Yeah, no shit.

That's what dads do. Pretty original take that your dad had. You're gonna have to work if you want to earn it. You know, he said that I'm gonna have to work if I want to earn it. Let me tell you something, Garth fucking Brooks. Imagine a pig with tits. Okay, oh, speaking of a pig with tits,

even his ex-wife, the first wife, the first Trish, had nothing but good things to say about her ex-husband, which, listen. They know the routine. No one's gonna, you're not getting in the dock if you're talking about it. She's like, I knew he was talented. First time he sang, I was like,

why are you gonna really sing? That is 100% her interview. You know, he's just the best Garth, he's the best man on the planet. His penis is so large and his music is so good. Best lover I ever had. Give me a break. I know.

Anyway. This guy is on, and I would like a psychologist to really analyze, and all jokes aside here, I'm very curious as to what is really going on. This guy has such a serious facade going on. What is really the deal? I think part of it, honestly, I think part of it is the pressure of being that famous and celebrated.

I think it kind of fucks with you, you know? Like Tom Cruise has that kind of thing too, where he's just never normal. Well, I'm just saying, like the expectations, like people are like, if people all day are not, they're not just saying like, I'm your fan. They're like, you changed my life. When I went through this, I listened to your albums

and I wasn't able to recover without, like if you're getting told that millions of times, I think, you know, your expectations of yourself change. I know, that's funny. I think that's part of what's happening to him. It always makes me laugh when we get those kinds of emails and compliment you like, you're fart jokes. Saved my life when I was in the hospital.

And you talked about that. It's nice, right? It's nice to hear. Coming in his own face. Yeah. I'm like, our stuff is not exactly the same as like a well-crafted country song. But that's what I'm saying though,

if you had the same impact. Yeah, it's meaningful. Yeah, it's meaningful. But I don't know, this guy is not. Yeah. Anyways, listen, this is the gift he keeps on giving. We'll come back to it. This, you know, we've gone down this path a lot lately,

but he just keeps giving, keeps giving, and a lot of people are pointing out rightfully so that Connell checked out right before the world changed. And it is curious that he passed and then a pandemic takes place. And then, you know, there's this horrific thing that happens in the world where everyone's protesting and you're like, really?

If that smoker doesn't have anything to do with any of this, okay. How do you get a job here, your fuck face? Are you insinuating that he planted the seeds? I don't know, but we did discover the video where he pulled somebody over. Oh, no. What the fuck?

You're speeding, Americans. Remember him? Remember this guy's speeding? He'll have to pull his ass over. You're under grass, buddy. Um, it's a pretty bold move. How's it going? Hi, can you tell me the speed limit out here,

Well, it's marked on the signs. 60. Well, it's variable. Oh, it is? Yeah, it's right here. It's typically 60. Yeah. He has a fake cop car.

Yeah, that's what he always drove. I did not realize that he had lights and... Yeah, he had a black unmarked. Crazy, like stuffed with shit and racks on top, like crown Vic. I gotta tell you that, I guess, because every time he's talking, I'm just so blown away at the content.

I'm not really noticing the form. This is a real new lane to get into, though, to pulling people over. You're impersonated. Yeah, I'm fast for you going there, bud. Well, I thought, yeah, I thought you was a cop for a minute. Are you a cop? No, I'm not.

What's going on with the camera? Oh, I clipped you in and going like 75. You what? I clipped you in and going, I'm not a cop. I was filming you do about 70, 75. You know what? Yeah. Yeah.

That guy goes, you know what? No. No. Just no. Can you imagine sitting on the side of the road and he comes up to you like, how fast you go in there, brother? And you're like, what?

And you see the hair standing up and you've been grinding his teeth for a while. Who knows what he's fucking wearing right here? He doesn't even have a gun, like one of those, not a gun gun, but a speeding, the gun that they catch on. This guy just goes, you know what? Who are you?

No. No badge, no uniform. Am I allowed to be 70 out here? Yeah, I'm not a police officer. I'm not gonna tell you what you can or can't do. Okay. But I can tell you that if you want to be driving while you're filming, that's against the law.

Our car's got dash cams all over it. I was filming when I was driving. It's filming us right now. That's definitely not true. But what color is this car? This car's white. It's a white knight. It's got a white chariot there.

Yep. He's seen them everywhere. All these fucking white chariots driving around. Now, what is the symbolism of the white chariots though? Do you know? I thought he's just noticing a lot of them. Okay. They don't mean anything?

I'm not sure. I haven't noticed like why he's doing it. Cause I don't think he's like, he doesn't go like, isn't that great? He's just like, there's a fucking other one. Like they mean something. He's just recognizing patterns it seems like. I don't know though.

I think they symbolize something else because remember when he was interviewing the Asian lady and he noted that they were white. Isn't that ironic? Yeah. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. I think it's a racial thing for him.

I think it's a symbol of the, oh yeah. There you go. A white horse. That's right. Jesus stuff. And what does it say that it symbolizes? The bottle. Like on the, on the, the drop down?

They always come down in a white chariot, right? Like they're saviors or something. What does a white horse symbolize? See the next question down. What does that one say? White horses stand for the balance of wisdom and power. Hmm. Christianity. Oh, it's a symbol of death.

Oh. Ooh. I, but see I doubt that he. No, he doesn't know all that. No. He's just like, they're keep making white cars. Yeah. What do we think in his deep?

Come on. Yeah. I drive this. There, that's who walked up to you. Very respectably. I didn't catch your name. Yeah, you didn't. Yeah.

Well, can I have it? No. No. No. That's the right attitude. Yeah. Yeah, that's, that's, that's how you want to handle someone like that.

Didn't catch your name. Yeah, you didn't. And he's being way nicer than he has to be. Absolutely. Really? And he's still telling this story, by the way. This guy, you can tell you what happened to me one time. On the side of the road, he fucking,

he has like a state provided vehicle or something though, right? No, yeah. He is a government employee. Just not a police officer. Yeah. But, but Conold was hoping that he was pulling over a police officer.

Oh my God. Which is insane. I know, he was gonna be like, how fast were you going there, bud? He, he was bummed. He was bummed that he wasn't like a sheriff. It's fucking crazy, man. That's so wild.

The fastest you was going, the lady behind me was, I had to slow down for that bitch, and she was driving on the bus to you, okay? I'm like a mouse on these roads, okay? I am, dude. You told me that the first time. Yeah, okay. Well, thank you very much.

Okay. Oh yeah, okay. Colorado Department of Transportation. This guy, he's like, oh my God. You know where the nearest rest room might be? Oh, you're filming the car. I'll get you stuff here too. What, do you think I'm the bad guy now?

No, I don't think you're a bad guy. I think you're a speeder, brother. You better slow it down if you wanna keep your job, okay? I'm a retired state CI double agent. You know what that is? Means I'm a ways on record, brother. You were in the wrong, okay? The wrong.

CI double agent? CI double agent. Never heard it said that way, but I'm gonna start saying it. This guy's a CI double agent. Lot of training for that. So you slow this motherfucker down, okay? Are you gonna be pushing a pencil or something in my spec?

But working at Burger King, where you probably used to work before you got this fucking job, okay? You remember working at Burger King? You sure do. Thank you. I mean, who was he to throw stones when he was working at Falcon Car Wash?

I mean, he owned and operated a car wash, a dentistry practice, a barber shop. I'm sure he has massage practice. That's true. He could have been who you saw. Let me tell you what I saw in the park. I mean, you're gonna die. I was driving into work and I've tell you this,

I've seen a lot of shit. I've seen guys fucking in the streets of San Francisco. I saw a guy wearing a pink unitard on a unicycle. I've seen crazy shit. I saw a man laying in the grass on his stomach shirtless and another man on top of him giving him a full body massage. Like in the park.

Just a one man giving another man a massage. I'm a retired state CI double agent. That's probably who you saw. But I'm thinking I've never seen that in my entire life. I haven't seen that. I do think that I have a real like, like primal resistance to seeing public massage. Oh, of course.

I like doors closed, curtains drawn dark. Yeah. I mean, I think mall massages are weird when they have a little thing. And I think the airport massage. The weirdest. I've walked up before when like, they're like massage like, yeah, where?

And they're like, right here. I'm like, what about all the people walking around? And they're like, yeah, they'll just watch. I'm like, no. Wait, cause I'm, I would imagine that everyone's looking at me cause they are. When you walk by and you see that person with their face matched into the black thing

and then they're sitting up. Then you start to like actually pass out in the chair and people just walk and buy you. Well, and also they don't let you lay down on those airport massages. You're sitting. You're just hugging that chair. You're sitting Garth style on a chair.

Hugging the chair and someone's grinding in your back and you're like drooling. Yeah, it's like, let me lay down and really enjoy this. Cause you're not enjoying it. Can you give me a little bit of privacy? A little bit, right? Like it's like those Chinese foot massage places and you're lined up with every other A-hole

in the neighborhood. I don't want that either. I always ask for private room. A little bit of, be a discreet in some way. Private room. And that may be an additional $10, but you know what? It's worth it.

Or way other worse and the Chinese massage you ever had where they do your feet and then you're like, you want full body and you're like, yeah. And then they sit you up and then they just give you a back massage with your bra. But how do they ask you? You want full body and then they give you the massage

but you're sitting up so you're not comfortable again and everybody's watching. I don't like it. Yeah. Have you done it? Yeah, no, I have. I have. It's all, yeah.

It's uncomfortable. Do they make you go shirtless or do they make the men keep on their shirts? No. Cause I have to keep my bra on. If it's like a legit Chinese place, yeah, no, they'll just like, they'll wear their shoes and just climb on you.

And you keep your clothes on. Yeah, no, it's not, yeah. It's totally done like that. By the way, we did a big push for our favorite human ever. RPC, of course I'm talking about. Come check it out. He has a, he has a, He's in my building, try it out.

He has a fans only as he likes to call it. We like to refer to it by it's more commonly referred to name only fans. And we wanted to give you a little taste of the difference between some well-known people on only fans and the content they put out and then just the way RPC handles it. Good, because I'm not familiar

with the only fans website. So there are a lot of people in the adult business who do that. And of course it's a revenue stream. It's a way for them to have like isolate fans come here, see exclusive content. It's, you know, they're owning their content, making money and connecting with their fans.

It's great. So here is an image from Alexis Texas from her only fans, correct? And you can see it's, you know, sexy photo. Well lit. Yep, she's laying on a bed. You could post this on social media. It's like, it's right on the line

of probably getting flagged by Instagram, but you could definitely, but you know, you're, this is like, you're seeing what she would put out there, right? So if you're- And she's got a lot of genres in place. She's got the foot demo. She's got the Heini demo.

That's two big demos, right? And she's on the bed being like, come get it, you know? Come get it. What's up? And then like, that's her. And then like, this is, this is RPC. Right there. Let me know guys, man.

I'm gonna compete a fucking man. I'm gonna get a rate with your fucking dicks, man. You fucking big black guys, the Latino guys out there. Man, you got Harry as a matter. You're a big bear. Man, fuck. Come fuck me, man.

Come fuck me, man. Come fuck me, man. His stomach's bigger than I remember it. His stomach looks bigger when he turns. Well, it's quarantine. Quarantine 15. Yeah, he's got a new necklace on. I didn't notice.

He's got a new necklace. Got the cowboy hat. But you know, it just looks, mechs it up. Here, here's a, there's Lexi Belle. Pretty lady. All right, pretty girl. And this is from hers. And what is it?

Well, she's posing in a bathroom mirror. And you know, she's throw up the peace sign. She's got a little like half the crop top on yoga pants. And it's just like, hey, I'm sexy. I'm fun. What's up guys? Again, connecting with the fans. Showing your fans what you're like in real life.

It's a lot of sweat. Oh, his nipple clamps are on there too. He's in the hallway. He's in his own hallway. Oh, oh, he's gonna drug off in his own stairwell. Whoa. 2395. Oh my God.

He's in his hallway in the building. So you could, you could be walking into your apartment or out of your apartment. Just see that in the halls. It's pretty cool. Again, this is available at onlyfans.com slash, was it our champagne? Robert Champagne.

Robert Champagne. It's pretty cool, man. What's up onlyfans members? What's up? I'm excited because I'm feeling better and tomorrow at 1130, PST, AM, I'm gonna be going live on onlyfans slash, Adriana Chachak.

So come hang out with me. You see all these unicorns pooping cupcakes? Well, we're gonna be making some cupcakes. So let's get messy. Let's play in all of that cream and I'll see you guys tomorrow at 1130 AM. PST, I got it. Have a great night.

Again, you get, yeah, it's a famous adult performer and she's giving you the big up. So like, here's what's gonna happen at my onlyfans, you know? You're gonna make cupcakes. We're gonna make cupcakes. You're gonna see me, yeah. Snatch, yeah, we got it. Yeah, so it's pretty cool and then, you know,

there's RPC. Yeah, wanna come, yeah, wanna come. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh no. Oh, that was the turning point. That's why you pay extra, right there. That's the fee. That's what you pay for that, right?

Well, so all of the other people they're kinda treating the only fans like, hey, you pay X amount a month and then you get access to purchase this extra exclusive content. Right. So it's like a paywall on a paywall. Gotcha.

RPC says, give me 20 bucks for three months and you get it all. Oh, so those other, those ladies we showed, that's like the stuff that goes like, this is the outside, this is outside the door. Right. You wanna get, And you have to pay money to be outside the door.

Gotcha. But then if you wanna watch her do muffins at 11 a.m. PST, you have to pay more money. And I think that's where like my instincts come in is seeking value. So if you're looking for more bang for your buck on fans only, for only fans, for fans on HT, BP, only fans on RPCs, only fans.

That's where the real value is. It's the most valuable only fans account on the platform. Wow. I feel sick from this one. There's one very tiny paywall and it's not even. It's not that big of a paywall. It's not a big hurdle. Oh, oh, oh.

That's pretty cool. You know, he's so horny for his age too. He is, and that leg slap, when he slapped his legs in the hallway, I mean. It's a loud one. Yeah. How come he's so horny and he's in his,

I don't know how old he is, mid 50s. There's a lot of horny people out there. Yeah. It's good for him. Good for him. He still has that drive. Mm-hmm. I don't like him eating his mayonnaise though.

Oh, I thought it was pretty cool. I don't like that part. All right, maybe we should take it a little break. Okay. Let's take a quick break. We'll go vomit, thanks. And we'll be right back. All right, we're back.

Josh Potter's here. It's the best theme. I'm doing that a lot more lately. Yeah. What do you mean? The world got to step into your house. I saw my room. That video was a hit.

Yeah, I'm glad. That's what I'll say about. I'm glad it's a hit. Yeah. Yeah. I have to say. I feel like it's really let the curtain down for a few, and I've lost some fans.

I think you gained some fans too. I gained a lot. Well, yeah, I'm just talking about the ones that were willing to suck my dick before. Yeah, but that doesn't mean they're not, like there's gonna be some new ones that wanna suck it in the new layout. And they know you.

They know what they're getting into, which means they really like you. Well, that would be true, yes. I do like the vetting process. Have you maintained at all? Oh, yeah. Like it's one of those things now where it's like I'm obsessed with maintaining it.

Good for you. So we'll see how, I mean, then the COVID will come back in the fall and I'll see what happens. You know, I have to also thank you for taking one for the team with TitCups, because. Oh, yes, you're welcome. TitCups were a huge hit as well.

My tits were on Fuego. Yeah, what was the aftermath like? They were bruised pretty good and my face had that bruise for like. That was my favorite. That was the coolest thing I've ever seen. The face one, that was the most comfortable. I could do that every segment.

Well, that, but the face one, I love, but also when you use that little cup for just the nipple. Oh my God, that was the best. That was torture. Yeah. Like if we ever have to punish somebody, that should be the. So are you using the?

Are you using them at all? I mean, they're in the, you know, because they are so space age, I didn't think that I should take them home. Oh, the studios, TitCups. So I kept them here in case, you know, someone else wanted to take it. Is that face bruise still visible?

It might be. I didn't cut myself shaving. Oh, okay. It might also be visible. So will you do, will you consider doing cameos with TitCups or no? Oh yeah, I would raise the price. I mean, I'd have to take them home and plug them in.

And I mean, we're talking overhead for electricity. A lot of wattage comes out of those. I'm thinking like for a TitCup cameo, you could probably up it to like 150. I'm gonna have to. I mean, the number of cameos that I'm getting already, oh, you know, I mean, I can't imagine RPC here, jizzing in his mouth and stuff like that.

Oh my God. I wouldn't be able to do that every time. It would really take a toll on me, you know. Are you gonna start jacking up? Only fans? I mean, if it gets to that point, I mean, the way the world is going, 2020 has been quite the year.

2020 is so fucked. I'm not ruling anything out. Yeah, shit, I might be doing that with you. Not too long from now. Fuck me. Yeah, but just so you know, I have ordered a dick cage. That's right, you did email me the dick cage. The dick cage is coming and I'm trying to reaching out

to some special people so that they can, yeah, experiment. On the way. You can't wait to feel that. I hope it's not one of those like, if I grow, it penetrates my erythra. Well, did you see? I didn't notice that I didn't want to look. We can look for a modification.

Don't cancel it. I don't want to do that. So I want to get into a couple stories that we read. So maybe some fun news that's getting lost in the shuffle. Yeah, because we have so much stuff on the one story, maybe we could start with the other story first. Oh yes, let's put a giant umbrella of allegedly over this first story.

Allegedly. Yes, but are you ear aware of Senator Lindsey Graham? I have completely turned off the news. You don't know Lindsey Graham? Lindsey Graham, the evangelist? Well, no, but I can understand why you might consider that to be his job if you heard him talk. Hey, from South Carolina, you definitely recognize him

if you see it. At the Kavanaugh trial, he'd be like, this is an Obama night. Oh, he's one of those. Yeah, he's a very, very old school. Isn't he like an old pizza chef? He's a bit of a southern. Yeah, yeah.

I have a little bit of a sweetness to myself. Yeah. Little bit of sugar in the tank, you might say. Little bit of sugar in my tank. Yeah, you're sweet in the sour sauce. And people have always accused him, despite his stances on gay marriage. He's very against it, obviously.

He thinks he's compared homosexuality to polygamy and other things like that. You would think that would mean he's like, you know, the straightest bachelor there is, but there have been accusations, perhaps maybe Lindsey Graham is a gay man. No. And these have followed him throughout his career,

you understand? And in 2018, he actually addressed it one time. He's like, I hate to disappoint y'all, but there is no clandestine relationship with Rick and Martin happening. I'm sure hundreds of gay men are jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge when they find out that I'm straight, but I'm sorry, I'm not gay.

And he went through all this trouble to explain. And recently, and I don't know what the catalyst for all this was, recently male sex workers have decided that they are going to speak out despite signing nondisclosure agreements about their relations with Lindsey Graham. And one such instance was published and then deleted at one point.

But it was commenting on Lindsey Graham and a sexual encounter and they were in the hotel room. Here's the actual image that's taken from it. You want me to read it? Oh yeah, you can read the story if you'd like. If you want to describe it. Well, just, I mean, you can describe it or if you want to read it.

I mean, literally it says that the man goes, he went to the bathroom, he pulled up the image just to be sure, because he thought the guy looked familiar. He went by the code name Lady G. Lady G. And he pulled the picture, goes, yep, it's Senator Graham, all right.

And when I came out of the bathroom, he was on the bed naked on all fours. I noted that there were dark marks around his anus. I asked if he had showered, he said yes. I asked if it was okay if I wiped him down. He said, sure. I wet a face towel and I wiped and wiped between his buttocks, but nothing was coming off.

Then I realized that his taint wasn't dirty, it was just full of moles. Dark moles in dense clusters, up and down the length of his taint. Aw, he said, hope you don't mind. You wanna say the next line? Those are just. Them, just my little butterfly.

What did you say? My little ladybug, that's right. Them are just my little ladybugs. Those are my little ladybugs. And then the guy said, I ran out of there. Now you know what I see in my mind any time he comes up in the news. Ladybug.

Any escort he's hired should be able to verify this. Thank you for listening. Wow. Is that why Tom's called Mr. Ladybug? Because of your anal moles. I got all them tape buds. That's why you wouldn't go down there this whole time. I mean, any medical professionals listening,

is that possible that it's moles or could it be warts? Oh, I'm sure it's possible. It's moles because it's your skin. HP. And clearly he's grown up with this. He has a name for it. Do you think his mother gave him that when he was a child? But you could have anal warts, too.

Mommy, why do I have. Yeah, but why couldn't it be moles? I just, I don't know. I would imagine to have a bunch of them, a cluster on your taint would be really rare. No, because you can have a cluster of moles anywhere. Yeah. It's your human skin.

Is it wrong to have empathy for a person who doesn't have any? Do you know what I'm saying? You have what? Is it wrong to have empathy for a person who lacks it completely? No. Because I feel like he grew up with these.

You know, obviously he was like growing up and he's like, I have these weird things on my body. And his mom was like, those are just your little ladybugs. And then he took it with him throughout his life. And he has to explain that to every lover. You know, it must be taxing. Do you think he showed mama like as a teen?

He was like, mama, the boys say this is weird. I got all these chocolate spots. Oh, honey, them just your little ladybugs. I got chocolate spots between my leg, mama. Mama tells me, what if he said that to the male escorts? Mama says them, just my little ladybugs. Allegedly, of course, allegedly. Do you like chocolate chips in your ice cream?

I got some running up and down my tape. Chocolate chips. Them just the chocolate chips in my cream. In my cookie. Now, but hold on, am I on the wrong side here that if you sign an NDA and you willingly go into something as an escort, like, isn't that kind of not cool? Well, the outing, there is.

It's definitely in the not cool department. And also there, and it goes along the lines of the outing aspect. People are questioning that. Is this, is outing this man the right tactic? But because he's been so appalling as far as gay rights go. That's true, that's true. It's warranted.

That's kind of fair, I guess, right? If you have a track record. And that's why they're willing to jump in. He's anti like sex work almost too. And he's complicit in it. So it's. Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly.

But these guys always are this way. Always. These guys that are out against. Yeah, it's a whole list of. Super religious types are the ones who are like, when God sees a man, he does not see him laying down next to another man. When they really paint the image.

Spitting in the Lord's face as he jacks himself off watching this show. They really like, it's an abomination when man lays with man stroking his heart, heart glistening penis. And he's got that look in his eyes. And they really, it's kind of drift off, you know? I tenderly kiss his mouth. Yeah, yeah.

And the sweat from his balls. He feels his heart breath touch his tongue. Oh, God. And you think. It's abomination. A man would be able to withstand another man pushing up on his backside. And of course it makes you cum.

It makes you cum buckets, but it's wrong. Yeah. Oh man. Thanks for sharing the lady. Yeah, that's just fun, right? That's just a fun little. That's a fun one. Well, it's cute.

And that's why I thought it was something to bring up, something cute. You know, I felt kind of bad for Lindsey Graham that he's had to deal with, maybe if he didn't have his little ladybugs that were just kind of, you know, poisoning his brain his whole life, maybe he would be a little more well adjusted and he could come out and be gay

and help raise awareness. I'd like to say something, Senator Graham. I absolutely stand for ladybugs and for you to do whatever gets you off, sir. So, and this of course is, these are alleged accusations and you know, you might not have anything on your taint in which case, you know. What if he had, would you think that's gonna be a statement?

It's not about him being gay. He's gonna change the narrative and be like, how dare you say that about my taint? Here's a photograph of my taint. You'll see it is clearly got, I have millions of dollars. That would get moles removed. Exactly. Where's your logic?

If he did a photo release of his taint just to dispel the rumors. That would be beautiful. That would be beautiful. Together. As you can see here, exhibit A. His taint for press release would be amazing. Go ahead and, yeah, let's hear about this other story.

This is the one. Oh, dear. I'm so excited. Okay, I'm scared. Christina, do you know who Nacho Vidal is? Of course not, no. Of course, I thought you were gonna be like, of course. Nacho Vidal, is this a wrestler?

No, he is an adult film star. And he has a sort of a genre that he's a part of. A bit of the gonzo end of things, I would say. I've included some stills of his work. Well, this is a headshot. This is just a headshot. Yeah, he looks kind of like the kid that, you know, he was in like first grade with you

and he would play with a lighter on the school bus and then he grew up. He's a Spanish man, he's from Spain. And yes, he's very well known in the industry. Very, very well known performer. There's him giving a woman a breakfast in bed, it looks like, that's corn flakes, just a little spin on the cereal.

Yeah, he's rather aggressive. Uh-huh. Yeah, I would say that's a good word. Is he swatting over her? Yes, you see that blur is his penis and he's pouring corn flakes on her face. And I'd imagine he's gonna add the milk, if you will. Yeah, and I would say, I'd also add that,

that blur is not that small, if you know what I'm talking about. Yeah. We're not blurring out a brand name there. Yeah. Well, that's definitely some foreign cereal too, that's not the good kind to me. Yeah, I don't think they went out

and got a good kind for this because she's not really gonna get a lot in her mouth. Should we go to the next photo? Oh, sure, yeah, I mean, this one, he's just having, this is having a grand old time. Look at that smile on his face. And this is a, what's he doing here? I think that's a woman, maybe she's sleeping.

And he's smothering her with a pillow? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a woman under there, that's, I thought it was a doll. And where's his hand? I would imagine, due to the sensor blur, it's all, maybe the hand is hidden, you wouldn't see the hand without the blur

if you catch my drift. So basically he's a pretty intense guy. I saw one video with him and Rocco and it together. Wow, two legends. It was called Animal Trainer. Wow. Yeah. They were using a toilet,

just in ways that I've never even imagined. Sounded like. You ever heard of a swirly? Yeah. Yeah, did you ever think that it could be involved during sex? Cause I didn't until I saw this video. No, Animal Trainer, huh?

Yeah, you should check it out. Put that on your cue. Yeah. It's gnarly. So this man, you know, he's very rich, very wealthy. He's had some troubles with the law in the past with some embezzling or some things like that. He had embezzling trouble?

Yeah, he had some money tax fraud and things like that. Your typical white collar stuff, you know? Should I play these interview clips? Well, we can get into that, but I wanted, do you want me to talk about his crime? Yeah, so like what he's been arrested for. Yeah, he was recently arrested, Christina, because he was having a ritual with two other people

that involved the venom of a toad. And well, one man inhaled the venom of the toad and it murdered him. He died. He died. So now Nacho is being charged with manslaughter because he was the shaman of the ritual. Oh, wow.

And was he aware that this could potentially kill? Well, I think when anybody, I'm not really one of these holistic types. I've never dabbled. I just smoke bowls, do you know what I mean? Like I've never really gone like, what, you know, amphibian can I lick to get fucked up off of?

So I don't really know how it works. Oh my gosh. They did dry it and then inhale it. And I know it has like DMT properties and people do this all the time. And I don't know if Nacho is like, maybe what he was gonna do in his retirement become like a shaman for people

to guide them through their trips or what have you. But in this case, it went awry. I'm afraid. Where did it happen? At his home. But where's that? In Spain. Oh, so that's where the-

Yeah, this is- It all happened there. In Spain, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's happening. So it's like, you know, I don't know. I think, you know, it's kind of an accident. Yeah, it sounds. You know, it sounds like an accident.

But I read in the brief thing that I saw said, this has been an ongoing investigation for like- Right, for like, it happened a year ago. A year ago. Yeah, so- So they really have been- Trying to hammer it home. And I'm not sure if it's because of all the previous

white collar crimes that he got away with or whatever if they're trying to build a case against him. So they were doing like some type of ceremonial thing? Yeah, they were having like a ritual, you know, trying to have a trip, you know? It's kind of like doing DMT. Right, or ayahuasca, that kind of thing. Well, this is, yeah, this is specifically

very similar to DMT. Okay. And so they're trying to have a fucking trip and like, you know, open their third eye and all that shit. And so Nacho is getting involved in that. And he's doing that now. Which is better than his previous work, I'd imagine,

you know? Isn't it weird that he has manslaughter charges for this, but he never murdered anyone in any of his porn? Mmm. That's a very interesting point. Probably could have. Well, he was slapping people around. I mean, he does a lot of stuff slamming their heads

with toilet seats and shit. Yeah. Wow. So it is just wild that this caught up to him in this regard. But yeah, in that video clip, he talks about like, the difference between mainstream film and what he does. Where is the limit for a porno?

Where is the limit for porno? Because you can shoot a regular movie, mainstream movie, and they know it's a mainstream movie. And you know, they know it's a script and they know it's not true. But the pornography have that power. Then the people believe that these things are happening for real.

You need to know how ridiculous questions people ask me about it. You know, like, oh, she was, you know, you really pick up in the school, right? Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, she, oh, how old is she? She was 15, she was 16. I'm like, yeah, she was 19, 20.

It's just the rest of the rest of the school. So different, big difference, man. Oh man, you know, like, fuck, really, you know. Okay, so I think what he's saying there is about how fans- People believe porn is real. Believe there, yeah. Where as when you watch a movie, you understand that it's film and it's fiction.

That's right. Well, people believe that what we do in porno is true. That's why when they see you slapping a girl, they think you are motherfucker. But when they see Robert De Nito or, you know, Jack Nicholson raping a girl in the movie, they would, wow, what a great actor. What movie was that?

That's a good point. I don't know. Check that one out. I never saw, I don't know. You never saw the famous De Niro rape thing where he was like, hey, I'm raping this girl. Rap you. Hey, you want me to rape you?

Are you, are you raping me? I'm gonna rape you. And then there's Jack, he's gonna say, hey, are we raping people? Now, I do remember that Jack has the famous one that we always talk about. Are you fucked up enough to let, remember? You fucked up enough to lay me.

What? Yeah, the girl, does the girl say it to him? I don't even remember the reference. We've been saying it for so long. It was a movie with Jack Nicholson where he's like, oh yeah. Yeah, he's all, the girl's much younger and. As good as it gets.

I think I thought she said no. Yeah, that was a good one. I thought she was like, are you fucked up enough? Yeah, I think that's what it is. He reaches for a bottle and he's like, ugh. Yeah. Fucked up. I'm too distracted by his shaman's necklace.

You know what you are, huh? Well, he is getting into the spirit, right? Doesn't he have a really intense look though? Could you imagine him in like a cave where he's like making you lick a frog and fucking, he's like, now you're going to see Jesus. Because honestly, and I know this is just like a look, but that dude, seeing him, it makes me a little uneasy.

Like if I were to spend, I would feel uncomfortable around that guy. He's an intense man. Well, and he looks like he smokes a lot of cigarettes. I don't know if he does, but doesn't he seem kind of smoky and like doesn't take care of himself? Super cool, yeah.

Super cool. I don't know, the eyebrows are a little high. Real cool. Yeah, you got to see some of his work. No thanks. It's really something. No thanks. Really, really something.

It is. You're familiar? Banana land. I think I've seen one or two things. It's not my, I'm not into it. It's fucking. Yeah, it makes you wonder. You're like, what am I doing if this is sex?

Yeah. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. Right. What am I doing? This guy's varsity and you're peeing. Oh, I mean, I mean, beyond varsity.

This guy is an astronaut. Yeah. This guy is on another planet of his own. So, but he is likening himself to actors. I see what he's saying, like. I've heard this argument before. Which it is, it is fake sex. It was that documentary.

He's like, I'm going to slap the shit out of you at this point and then you'd say, ow, it hurts and then I hit you again in the face. Do you think they plan it out like that? I don't know if it's in that detail, but he's probably something like, you like it rough, no? And she's like, yeah. And then he's like, wow, man.

She's like, holy shit. You think he asks you like it rough or do you think he comes in there and he's like, obviously this chick is signed up to do this? Yeah. You know who I am. You see the toilet here.

You know who I am. What do you think the toilet is for? Yeah, we're going to use it. Not for poopy or pee pee. We're going to give you a face of wash. Oh my God, dude. It is. Yeah.

But yeah, no, I mean, he compares it to film. Well, here's the deal, right? Porno is essentially prostitution with cameras and the camera gets you out of it being a prostitution charge. Prostitution is not a word that we sex workers ever want to use. And explain why. Because that is an improper stigma.

Oh, I'm sorry. Have I been prostitution phobic? This, well, you are definitely phobic of some kind. I don't know if it's, I don't want to use that word. That is a slur in our community. Sorry, sorry. But yes, no, he's liking it to film and like Jack, I mean, I don't know which movie Jack Nicholson raped a woman,

but I don't know that one either. But I do remember watching one of those documentaries. Those are all in Spanish. I tried to watch one. No, no, no, a documentary about the adult business where Ron Jeremy made that point where he was like, we're doing, he was talking about like Stanislavski and you know, big acting coaches.

And he was like, we're doing like the highest form of this. Which is, yeah. I have to pretend I give a shit about this broad. Yeah. And then I'm at the cominer at the end of the scene. I don't even like blogs. It is acting, right? It's a Herculean thing for them.

I'm into fair skin women. I'm over here fucking this tan girl and it's, I got to pretend like I like it. It's true. Yeah. Well, I guess, yeah, the argument being, How am I supposed to get hard without another woman's tongue in my ass right now?

But that's true, so they, I got to pretend I like this. But like, you know, you suck a D in a mainstream film and it's considered artistic, right? Like Brown Bunny. I think Chloe Seven, you got a little heat for that one. Yeah, more than a little. Like her career was destroyed.

But it was artistic. Some people thought of it that way. And now she's starving like an artist. But no, she's probably doing just fine. Big Love was a fantastic show. But yeah, wouldn't it be funny if he was like really in bed real lover, he's like, I really like cuddling. I don't really.

In real life, you never know. I'm just a cuddler in real life. Do all this toilet slamming. Way too much of a savage for that to be true. Your husband told me a little info about him that he discovered that he was too sick of having sex with women, it just bored him. That he just started having sex with trans women.

And I believe that I got more like the full talking to about that from Yoshi a few years ago. He was like, he was like, you know, he goes, Rocco was going to pass the torch to Nacho. He was like his apprentice, the next superstar. But then Nacho got bored and he went to Brazil to find a bunch of girls down there and some trans people. That's what he's doing now.

That's a really good Yoshi. That was really good. I felt like I was talking to him. Speaking of Yoshi, I got a DM from him that I believe he's a part of the new vaccine. Oh, good. He's in the human trials. Yeah, he's doing the human trials.

He's in the third stage of a trial somewhere in Seattle, I believe. Bill Gates is already in his brain, man. Good luck Yoshi. You get like $6,000, I mean you can go to Frankfurt and get some girls. But thank you Yoshi for sacrificing your body for the sake of humanity.

For humanity and for money for girls. The rest ones are in Germany. God love him. Well, there aren't many male stars like this guy, Nacho. Are there many male stars? Dude, I'm telling you, Yoshi broke it. He said that this was an apprentice to Rocco. Yeah, this was like the next guy.

It's like Robert Redford to Leo. But he literally wanted to go into Brazil and have sex with transsexuals. Is that what you're saying? He just went that lane instead of being like this. Remember when Chappelle left and went to Africa? Yes, yes. He flipped out and he needed to clear his head.

Same, same, same, same. Only Chappelle I don't think went to fuck trans women. You don't even know that though. I'm not gonna say. You don't know that. No, but that, yeah, this is what the intel. You know, could you imagine inheriting? He's doing a great performance here.

He has a huge dick. Could you even take Rocco's torch though? I mean, that guy's. Well, that's a lot to live up to and maybe that's why he did, yeah, maybe that's why he did flee. Maybe he was like, fuck this. The guy's a real legend.

I don't wanna live in a shadow. I'm gonna go suck a couple of dicks. Have my dick get sucked a couple of times. So let's talk in Brazil or we'll fuck around. This was like that description for you meant that he was so bored of fucking porno checks. He was like, we gotta step it up, man. Yeah, I need it to be gnarlier.

Yeah, I need it to be, I need the next level. What's gnarlier? I need to push it. Push, push, push. Would you fuck a girl with a dick? Would I fuck a girl with a dick? Where's the deal? Yeah.

Like a girl if she had a dick on her. But you're fucking her butt. But you're fucking her butt. Like what if you're just like, you're making out with a smoke show girl. Right. And then all of a sudden she takes, she's like, I have a dick and you're like,

oh, that's a surprise. And she's like, oh, you just have to touch it with your hand. Are you stopping? No, no, I'm finding a toilet and I'm fucking taking her to it. You're gonna jack her D? Huh?

You're gonna J or D? I'm gonna J, her D? Yeah, she's got a dick. Well, I think, I mean, at that point, I feel like I should be like- You're in too deep. You're already in the heart. Yeah, I feel like I'm in too deep.

But I feel like, look, why don't you service me first and then we'll take care of you. No, you gotta do that first, otherwise you're not gonna want to after. And then it's gonna be a real fucking like- No, but you're saying- So what I gotta do- You're gonna be grudgedly do it then at the end.

You have to do it while you still have the poison in there. But he's saying, let her take care of him first and then he won't take care of you. That's a real shithead move. Yeah, that's, look at your talking to him. But I'm saying if you were to follow through, if your conscious caught up to you and you felt that guilt and you were like,

I guess I have to. I would leave and then I would come back and I'd be like, I felt real bad that I didn't jack you all. I'm back. And then you would do it, that would be worse. Like the next morning. That's way worse. She's like, I'm at breakfast.

That's way worse, sir. That is way worse. I'd get it out of the way. I'd be like, I'm so horny, I'm just gonna jerk this dick. And then, then I get to do- Kid, what if she's like, I don't want you to jerk it. I want you to like, you know, slob on it.

Yeah. That might be tough. There might be an impasse there. Okay, what if she's like, can I just put it in your ass real quick? That would be tough. How big are we talking? It's not that big.

It's like, and it's like new. She added on. No, she's a guy. Oh yeah, you're right. I want you the other way. My bad. I'm trying, I didn't know which way. She used her tick up.

Cause either way, I'm not, either way I would still have in the scenario. She used her tick up. So it's a dude. Okay. No. What would you let her do then? I would do the hand job.

Oh, the hand job? If I was in the throws- If she throws her hand job. But then that means that's all you get back. That's what I'm saying. You'd be like, all right. I bet I could up the ante and then I could be like- You talk right into it.

Wait a minute, hold on. What about me in a trans man? Wait, how would that work? Let me wrap my brain around this. So hold on. Here with a man. Woman. No, no, no.

Would you lick a man's box? That's right. Hold on, like Buck Angel? Yeah, exactly, exactly. Okay, hold on, I'm wrapping my brain around this. So you're seeing a good looking guy. Right. You think he's physically attractive.

And then he's like finger me and you're like your butt and he's like, no, my pussy. And you're like, what? Wow, that's such a fucking noodle bender, right? Exactly, yeah. Okay, well here's the deal, man. I'm afraid of his vagina. Like I'm kind of a-

But you don't see it until you're already- Yeah, you're all- In the throws you're making out. You're like- You're all dood up. Okay. You are a snail trail in the country. All right.

Then I guess, yeah, I just go where the day takes me. All I gotta do is just like flick whatever. Flick their bean. I mean, you just gotta flick the bean a little while. But I don't, oh man, vaginas are way more daunting than penis because they're complicated, no? I disagree. I mean, that's relative to who you are, I suppose.

But I think it's another way. I think if you know a vagina, you can do it. A penis, I know how to do. I don't know how to do penis or simpletown. Outside versus inside stuff. Right, that's a thing. There's a lot of complications to the vagine. Just let me eat you.

Oh boy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. This is the coolest guy episode. I'm gonna yawn. Yeah, I got it. Yeah, you become that guy in the scenario. Ha ha ha, let me eat you. Yeah, you start saying-

Oh, do I have to go down on Buck Angel? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's different, huh? I would finger her, him, but not, I don't know if I'm- I'm gonna make you cry. Ha ha ha ha ha. What about that other thing that they do

where they grind their jays together? I heard the lesbos don't really do that. Yeah, I've seen it and I've not seen it. Yeah, you're the expert, you tell me. Cause I've seen ways where they can do it and I'm like, I've talked to girls and they're like, yeah, it's fun, cause it's like humping something. But it's not, you know-

I might do that cause that's easy. Then I don't have to like touch it, lick it, or deal with it. Yeah, let's just rub each other. Grind it out. Eat you one time. Oh. Yeah.

You sleep for three days, baby. Well, I just wanna let everyone know free nachos. Trending on Twitter, hashtag free nacho. Oh, absolutely. I think it's the most important hashtag that should be going on at the moment. I don't think there's anything, I mean, that should be riding above that.

Is he in jail right now? I believe he's in custody, yeah. He's in custody. Nacho, we got your back. We need you in the world. And you can- Stickin' heads in the toilets. Stickin' heads in the toilets.

And you can, yeah, you can surpass. You can be better than Rocco. Nacho, don't run away from your destiny. You are our denero, sir. Thank you for stopping in. Thanks for having me. Thank you for filling us in. And I know you're doing, you're going on stage.

I think, I don't know if by the time this comes out, you've already been on stage. Yeah, this might be the last time you've seen my quarantine hair. Yeah. It's really accurate. Because you're gonna cut it after your set. Yeah, or four of my set, I haven't decided.

Okay. I think I might do the set with the hair. I'm actually kinda, is this weird? I'm kinda digging it. No, no. It's a whole new thing. Like, it's like a skull. Your beard has been shaped as well.

Like, I'm just like gonna look like a grand theft auto person, I think. And your beard to me reminds me of the Civil War. And I like it. I like it. Yeah. What is that, a van dyke? Which side am I on?

That's kinda scary for these times. Over these times, yeah. I see you like a... I'm gonna get thrown in the river like a... You're like a confederates general, you know. Oh, no, I don't know. Uh-oh. They're gonna fuckin' hang.

Please, know that I'm, and now, nonsense! Oh, shit. All right, we gotta run. Thank you, we'll be back shortly. Well, here it is. This is the big surprise. We were talking about it in our segment coming up to this. We are elated to welcome somebody we've been a fan of

for a long time, and we cannot believe that we get to talk face to face now with the great dog whisperer, Cesar Milano. Yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you. You really are. Thank you, sir. You rehabilitate dogs, but you train people.

I train humans. You train humans, right? I mean, we're pretty well-versed in a lot of the Bible, the Gospel of Cesar Milano, because we watched, I mean, hundreds of hours of you. Yeah, it's always interesting to meet somebody, you're like, dude, I get it, sometimes people come up to us and they talk to us in a familiar way,

where you're like, Jesus, and you realize they've been watching you for a long time, and I know you have to get that a lot, because we've been talking about today for a while, we watched so many shows, man. And I've read your books, and we even rescued our first dog, Fifo, and you helped us with his separation, anxiety issues,

so many behavioral issues, because of you. And you'll notice our perfectly-behaved dog, Vissy, because I read the puppy book you wrote, and I trained her according to your principles, and she is a goddamn near perfect dog. Thank you. Well, the principles that I follow are not my principles, it's just the dog principles.

Dog principles, you know what I mean? I just decoded it for Americans in the beginning. Because you grew up on a farm 346 miles away from Mexico City. Oh my goodness. Dialed in. Jesus, you did it. We're not playing games today, season.

We're not, you haven't, you're not. And you learned this calmness, sort of energy from your grandfather, who was not doing this stuff with dogs that people do, like come here, wait, is that like the high-pitched thing? You would throw them a couple of burritos every now and then, you said for their food. Oh, gorditas.

Oh, gorditas. Tacitos, yep. Right, and you grew up around these animals and you really wanted to know how they thought. I grew up, my grandfather always said, never work against mother nature. Always gain their trust, always gain their respect, and they're gonna give you a beautiful gift called loyalty.

So we come from a poor background, low-income background. So a gift, you always want a gift. And that's how he actually made me believe that I have to gain the trust, I have to gain the respect. And how do I do it? Well, you have to stay calm and you have to understand that the way they learn is no size ears.

Right. And then they like to do three things, follow, play, explore. So my grandfather, he likes it or not, he was a formula guy, you know what I mean? What I teach is a formula. So it's easy for you to remember. Right.

Exercise, discipline, affection, trust, respect, love, honesty, integrity, loyalty. So most people follow a formula, but it's backwards. Most people do affection first. Most people do affection in America, you said that in your books, you came to the United States and you saw that dogs were on leashes. Yeah, the land of the free and the dogs are on leashes.

And you go to Mexico, the dogs are on a leash. So which one is... Right. Right. It's just, people get very, very, very worked up about dogs not on leash in this country. I mean, there was even a very highly publicized incident that was charged with more in the video,

but it all evolved around, you know, somebody not having a dog on a leash. Right. I just, I never thought about that with, like, how that might not be as big an issue in other parts of the world. Dogs in third world country are skinny, but they don't have psychological problems.

Dogs in America are chunky and they get to have a TV show. Wow. Wow, I mean, that's fascinating. Well, let's talk about this. Why? Because you said on the farm, the dogs that you had were working dogs. They had jobs. Well, all animals know they have to work for food

and water, shelter and family. So there's no one animal on earth that doesn't know he has to have to work. So when a dog comes and live in America, that dog spends 23 hours behind walls. So he's on quarantine way before COVID. Right, right. Wow.

You see it? So when he goes for a walk, most American dogs, they do like a 15 to 20 minute walk and then they have to go back home. You see it? So they're not really, the humans don't understand that a walk is him working, is the equivalent of working. And why is that?

What? Why is that working for the dog, the walk? Why is it walking so important to the dog? Because you stress the importance of walking. So you have to see it this way. It's five body motions that that dog has to do. He wakes up and he stretches every single dog as soon as they wake up, they stretch.

The next thing is they need to walk and run. So why would they do that? Because that's how they find food and water. After that, they practice rest and then that's when they play and explore. And after that, they practice sleep, stretch, walk, run, rest, sleep. See, those are five body motions.

So that stretch we call a yoga. Walk and run, we go to a gym and then rest we call a meditation and sleep, people use pills. Right. Yeah. You see it, but if you do it right, if you drain the body, the mind, the heart every day,

the body automatically goes into a sleeping mode. That's right. That's the most important of all, because that's when you heal, that's when you regenerate brand new energy. Right. You know what I mean? If you wanna talk to universe,

that's when you talk to universe. Right. You see it? So it's the connection to everything is at that moment. But if you have pent up energy from a day before and then you're not really connecting, you know what I mean? And the dog knows, even when you go to sleep, you still stressed out.

So why dogs need leashes in America? Because the humans are not in tune to themselves. So that's why they can create calm, confident, love, joy. Right. So the most important energy is calmness. America is confident, not calm. That's true. So the hardest thing for me to teach my clients

is not the dog, it's to help Americans to calm down without drugs, alcohol, or anything. To do it in a natural way. The funny part is the most Americans when they want to achieve this, they go to India. So Americans go to a tour country, become enlightened and to start themselves to that, you know what I mean? To lose weight, you know?

So remember the book, Eat, Pray, Love? Okay, so she left New York to find love and to find enlightenment and to find connection, right? So people come to America to find money, fame, and power, but Americans go outside America to find natural, simple, profound. That's so true. That's so true.

He's like. It's so weird, yeah. And there's almost always a tale. Like if you study these uber successful people, like if you really like read about it and study it, they always get to the point where they're like, and there was nothing there. Like when I achieved this incredible level of fame

and wealth that they're like, and that's when I felt my emptiest. And you're like, oh, that's great. But we're all chasing it too. But then I went to India and I studied with the guru and I sold all my shit. That's right, I donated all my money. How circular.

Can I tell you, this is like, I'm jumping around here, but one of the things that I've seen, I saw it on your show a bunch and you see it in real life a lot. There's sometimes you would profile a dog owner and the dog was a rat, like crazy, like barking. And then they'd be like, I need Caesar's help. And you're like, I don't know if this is helpful.

I don't know if you can get help. I mean, this is like a maniac dog. And everyone's gone into a home with someone who's like, hey, just so you know, my dog's out of its fucking mind and it's gonna go crazy. And even when you watch those, you're like, how is it able to be remedied?

But I feel like all the ones that I saw, part of it was their energy, right? Like the human's energy and almost consistently they didn't walk, I feel like their dogs, right? They didn't exercise the dog. But like, do you run into that predicament a lot with dogs, the erratic, you know, like the dog that just won't stop?

Won't stop. But put yourself, let's go back in time. And you're a kid, all right? What's gonna influence you? Okay, so what's gonna influence your energy? So three things that is gonna influence your energy. Your home, so if you don't feel safe, peace and love, that's gonna alter your energy.

Right. So if your parents are not comfortable, love and joy, that's gonna alter your energy. If your parents are not doing exercise, discipline and affection as a family, that's gonna alter your energy. So those three things is going to make you develop the wrong energy.

Even if you can go to Harvard, you can still be unstable. We're the only species that follow unstable leaders. Yeah. Only species in the planet that follow instability. Yeah. You see, that means we were unstable for a long time in order for us to search or look for that energy. So we're looking for a same energy.

Right. You see what I'm saying? Yeah. Because they picture it as a money-faming power. We know I'm gonna do better because I'm telling you that I'm gonna create more money, more fame, more power to our country, then you look for that. Some people are not seeking for calm,

comfortable and love and joy because you didn't have that from the beginning. So are a lot of those, the dogs that I'm describing, are they, they're in an environment that is kind of dictating that to happen? Yeah. Like it's the instability and the- Humans or dogs.

Yeah. Yeah. That's what I say, put yourself as a child. Right. Because you're absorbing energy. Yeah. You know, you don't know anything else. And you as a kid, you will only choose

calm, comfortable and love and joy. You as a kid, you will only choose safe, peace and love. You as a kid will only choose exercise, mental stimulation and affection. You as a child. Right. You as a child want to fulfill your instincts, your heart and your spirit.

That's naturally, nobody have to tell you that. It's like the equivalent of breathing. Nobody has to tell you to breathe, feel in a pee, nobody have to tell you. You just do that naturally. Right. That's your natural state. Yeah, you're born with that program.

Yeah. But if they don't nurture it, and then you never master it. Right. You get out of whack. Yeah, so you should master it by the age of 10, calm, comfortable and love and joy. Master it.

Yeah. Exercise, discipline and affection. Master it. You're about to enter, you know, trust, respect and love. You should master it. But they tell you to master what? Words, they, you know, math. That's true.

You know what I mean? They tell you to master intellectual things. You know what? Okay. Cause I'll propose this thing. When I learned watching your shows and reading your books and in the process of rehabilitating FIFO, our first dog with the walk, it's so important

because I know this from watching you. And I see it now, right? If we're in the street and I see a little woman and she's got a long leash, one of those fucking clickers, yeah. And the dog is tremendous, huge, 150 pound mastiff. And it's pulling her along the road. I go, that's an analogy for everything in their world,

right? The dog is pulling you, you're out of control. And that, what do you teach people? You say, put your shoulders back, you're relaxed, you're assertive, your head is up, you're looking forward. And the dog, you're just loose. It's not, you're not choking him, you don't need to. And the dog will follow that energy.

And that is 100% true in life. Is it not? It was a metaphor for me for how you carry yourself in the whole world of just head up, calm the fuck down. I love the candle you have because that's exactly what the candles say, calm the fuck down. That's the most smart candle I've ever seen in my life.

Right. But the frenetic energy I think you're talking about and you see the dog come here and they're yelling and that. No, because I remember those, like there's certain things that like stick with you, you know, like certain lessons. And one of the things that I can access, I can access from memory certain things from the show.

One is the sound. Everybody. Everybody, I wanna do that to people all the time. Yeah. I do it to you. That's a very Latino sound, by the way. It's a very Latino sound. Yeah, that's true.

Where'd you get? My mom. Yeah. Every Latino mama. As soon as you cross the border, every, it's everywhere. It's like, yeah, it's like a what's up. And moments later, chunk less.

That's because you didn't listen to the sound. That's right. That's the follow through. That's the follow through. But that and the other thing that I like, I'll be walking our dog and remember, you know, the leash. And like that loose but shorter and that you're leading the dog.

Yes. You are the buck leader. The dog's not up here, the dog's not way back here. It's like, it's like kind of, you know, to your side but nearby. So just so people know, right? Because people have learned to enjoy seeing the dog in front.

You know, one thing that was very shocking to me when I came to America, is to see presidents following a dog, right? Except for this president, he doesn't have a dog. But previous presidents, they all have dogs. But you always see a dog going inside Air Force One first and going to the White House first. That was a bad, bad thing for Americans to watch

because then they get used to boy if the president of the United States let the dog go in front, it's okay. You know, Ferris Hilton does that and then it's okay. You see, I mean, all the influencers. So in America, politicians influence you as well. You know, not like in Latin America, politicians do not influence.

They just don't. They're like, this guy's a piece of shit. No, drug dealers influence you. Right. Carlos, you know, Pablo Escobar influenced you. And Chapo, those are the people like the movie stars over there, but they don't have a dog. You know, but here in America, the presidents have a dog.

So when I saw that for the first time, it's like, why one day I have to go to the White House and tell them, you know, that's not a good thing for Americans to watch. Right. You know, not from the beginning. So a dog has to do three things. Follow, play and explore. Most people, when they walk a dog,

they walk a dog in a play, explore state. But they're on the sidewalk. So that's not the place for the brain to practice, play and explore. Right. They need to be focused, right? Well, they need to be enough in a state of following you. So when they see another dog,

they don't claim for the sidewalk. Right. You see it? Yes, yes. So that's when a dog is in front, he's also leading. So he's leading, playing, exploring. That's what you see humans just doing this. And then, you know, and I said, my dog is not friendly.

It's not that the dog is not friendly, it's what they have the dog in that state of mind by being in front. But, you know, if you want to see the humans in America do walk a dog the right way, watch the homeless people and watch the handicapped people. So the handicapped people have a dog right next to them for obvious reasons.

And the homeless people have a dog behind of leash. Nine out of 10 homeless have pit bulls. Nobody complains when a homeless person walks a dog of leash. Because that dog is under control. Yeah. That dog is well behaved. Yeah.

But because it's living with a homeless, that human has a different perception about that poor dog instead of that dog is happy. Sure. Yeah. That dog is absolutely. That's true. A lot of times you, that's so funny.

He's off leash. I never really thought of that. You see them off leash and you're right. I mean, from a very, this is just like a cursory, pass by kind of observation. Dogs that I've seen in like homeless settings appear to be content. Like you see them like with their owner

and just, you know, well behaved. 24 hours, seven days a week. Yeah. There is no moment where those people are separated from the dog. That's so true. Most of my clients, they have to leave the dog 12 to 16 hours a day.

That's tough. You see it insane? So the nature of a dog is to always with the family. So they actually, the homeless provides that lifestyle. So the people, the working people, they have to learn to teach a dog to disconnect. So he can learn to live this unnatural lifestyle. Yeah.

So to separate yourself from your parents is so unnatural. That's why in preschool, most kids cry. Sure. You know what I mean? But now you have to go to school. But then the brain doesn't know how instinctually how to disconnect, you understand? Because you don't feel safe anymore.

There's a different pack. Right. And you haven't done natural activities with that pack. Eventually that becomes your teacher and your friends. Right. You see what I'm saying? So it's unnatural. Animals will never send kids to school.

Does the way that you, like, you know, obviously like a dog expert, but you also have other animals, is it the same application? Same, same thing. Trust, respect, love. For all animals. Yeah.

The thing is, most of the animals that I have, they have that same in common, which is migration, you know, walking. Yeah. So as long as I can put them into a migration mode, they become a family. So you can have a horse, an elephant, a camel, a zebra, a dog, a pig, and they walk in the same direction.

They will become a family. They will. Yeah, yeah. Fascinating. Because they practice in migration. Yeah. Let me ask you this. It's been said that now is a good time to adopt an animal

because everybody's home for COVID, you know, the quarantine. But I gotta tell you, I think it's good to adopt animals, but I feel like it's not a good time to do this because people are gonna go back to their lives and then you're gonna have a bunch of people with dogs left at home, right? Like this is the odd time that you're home all the time. I don't know, do you think it's a good time

to adopt an animal when I'm trying to ask? The thing is, they're gonna do it because they're bored. Right. Yeah. You see what I mean? So they're not doing it because it's a conscious love. Right. Right, so when you lack of knowledge,

you're unconsciously not loving right. And so right now, everybody, I have time, I need to put my time into something else. Instead of putting their time in themselves so they can actually heal and connect themselves to the, do they trust themselves, do they respect themselves, do they love themselves? Do I'm living my life at 100%

because a dog is gonna come in and it's, oh my God, you don't trust yourself, don't you? And they sense that you're... You don't respect yourself, are you? You definitely don't love yourself, right? And they know that on Wednesday, you're just miserable. It's something the dog will miserable. They will, gonna be miserable.

I'm just gonna intensify that. So we need to make sure that before we bring a human or a dog or a child into our home, that our energy is in a good place. Isn't it a good place? Yeah, because that's what we're gonna give. Not just the shelter, but our energy. That's right.

As the activities we have are their healthy activities. Do we exercise? Right. You know what I mean? We need to get a dog so I can exercise. The rhono. That's not really how you motivate yourself. Right, it's the cart before,

what is it, the wagon before the cart or the cart before the wagon? I don't know, sorry. That's an American thing, I don't know. Our boys slept with us last night. I think it's like before the horse. Some shit like that, I don't know. But you have to be prepared.

You know what I mean? Yes, he has to be prepared and your mind's gotta be right before you bring any animal in the home. Your instincts have to be right. Your heart have to be right. Your spirit have to be right. Then your mind have to be right. That's right.

Because I don't care about the intellectual house where you are. No. My clients are Harvard graduate but they can't walk a Chihuahua. Right, well who can? They look very hyper. Very high strong animals.

It's not the breed, it's not the breed. Really? No, it's not the breed. Okay. Do you feel like certain people, if they tell you how they are and that they shouldn't get certain breeds? Yes, certain breeds are not for certain people.

No, you should research them. I think it's energy. Let's talk about German shepherds. Everybody knows German shepherds. So within the litter of German shepherds is gonna be low, medium, high. So only one of those can be a police dog. Right.

The other ones can be pet quality and the other ones just couch potatoes. So it's the energy they're born with. Like specifically if you get a litter of German shepherds? No, no, no. It can be a litter of Rod Weiler, a litter of Rod Weiler. So in any family, it's gonna be people that have low level energy, medium and high.

Obviously I was the high one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You see what I mean? So if my mom or my dad didn't keep me busy and then I will destroy the house just like any high level energy dog. Yeah, we have one like that. You see what I'm saying?

So it's very important to understand what energy. You can't choose family, but you can definitely choose dogs and friends. Right. True. So for me, I always choose happy go lucky dogs. Yes. Always.

So those are the middle of the pack. We chose low energy for our second dog. Because we want to chill and we didn't want to chase him around all day. Listen, I want to get into you though as a person. I find you very inspiring. Thank you. So we know he grew up on a farm

and then when you were six years old, you were put into judo. Yep. And by the time you were 14. That's because I was high level energy. Because you were high level. You went after my sisters. That's right.

But listen to Caesar. By the time he was 16, no, sorry, 14, you would won six competitions consecutively in judo. Yep. Talk about focus and talk about discipline. That's right. And I sense this about you. You're the type of,

and I knew this from the minute we watched your show. Caesar's the kind of guy, what time do you wake up in the morning? Five. Right. I fucking knew it. And you're doing push-ups and you're saying hello and you're running with your pack of animals by 6.30.

What's your day like? Let's tell me. Well, five a.m. I woke up and I began to ask myself, how do I feel? You gotta check on yourself. You can't just work out and begin to stretch. Right. You know what I mean?

Especially when your goal in life is to change the world. Right. You got high goals. Yeah, high goals. You came from such humble beginnings. Yeah, I didn't jump the boat for nothing. I know. You won't talk about it.

Yes. So for me, I wanted to be the best doctor in the world because I thought that that was the only title to achieve in the dog world. The best. Yes, the best in the world. How did you come from such a small environment and how did you have such big dreams

growing up on a tiny farm? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Had you seen something like that that gave you the idea that I could be the best at? I want to be a soccer player. Yeah. I want to be a soccer player.

I want to be an actor because the novelas are very big in Mexico. I want to be a singer. I can't sing. So I always want to be something, it's more like how can I provide for my family? You know, at the same time, I'm a Virgo. So I got to do things right.

Okay, perfectionist. Did you see what you do now as even, did you see what you do now as even a possibility though? Like, you know what I mean? Like when you're coming here, you're like, I could do not just work with animals, but actually, you know, teach and coach and have, like you saw that?

No. No, okay. No, as an immigrant, what you're seeing is the opportunities. So this is definitely the land of opportunities, right? But as an immigrant, you always look at the empty spaces because this, you know what I mean? Like, it's all these spaces that are empty and then nobody wants them.

You know what I mean? Oh, nobody sees the opportunity or like why? They're not focusing on this. Why they're putting so much focus on training the dog and no one is training the humans. You see it? So when you go around the world, then you get to see how the world thinks.

You know what I mean? You can be okay, that thing from Asia can actually be really good here in America. That's what the pride acupuncture, right? Joga, where does it come from? It comes from freaking India. You see what I'm saying? So why?

Because Americans need to relax. Yeah, that's all cut back. You see what I mean? And we're popping pills and we're drinking. So hold on, you're up at five a.m.? Yep, five a.m. You do like a meditation, you center yourself. And then what?

And then I say, good morning to my girl. You know, make sure I praise, respect. Okay. Okay. And then I go and always brush your teeth and all that stuff. Then I go with a pack. Now, do you have a dog that sleeps on your bed? Do you allow a dog to sleep?

Who sleeps on your bed? Benson, Alfie, Spud, Sophia, not Junior. You let them all, I thought that was a forbidden zone. No, no, no. See, that's misunderstanding because what I say is inviting versus invading. So if you have seen the episodes I've done is a lot of people can't actually sleep in their own bed.

So I have seen that. You see it? So what I'm saying is invite because when they invite themselves, they're invading. Yes. You understand? Yeah, it's gotta be from you. Yeah, and you're inviting them

to the bed as comfortable as big, right? But then you tell them where you want them. Uh-huh, at the foot of the bed. Never up by your head, right? Well, I just, you know, they fart and they do all these things and they're far over there. Fart over there. Fart over there.

Fart there. She can really fart. Fart over here. Our dog farts. Yeah, exactly. And they're gonna do this. I don't want that. It's so gross.

I don't want that. I don't want it at that time. Fart me. I smell things all the time. All the time. You know what I mean? I have a car, especially for them. I have a ranch for them.

So I want a moment that's just me and my girl. Yeah, I hear you. So now hold on. You come to the USA. You come to San Diego. This is the part that I love, Cesar. I just think it's so amazing. He comes to the US, San Diego, he's dropped off.

No money. He's homeless for a month. Two months. Two months. Until you come upon these women who hire you to be a dog groomer. Yes. And you said that you appeared homeless,

that you were even, you know, your clothes were a little dirty. Yeah, I had the same clothes for two months. Oh my God. And that they gave you employment. They gave you half, 50% for cleaning the dogs. I was making- And shelter.

Yes, I was just making sure that we'll make $5 a day. Because back then you can go to AMPM at 7-Eleven, do hot dogs for 99 cents. So literally you just need a dollar in America to eat. Which is amazing. So my dad would always say, when he came to the US, he said, I landed in Detroit.

I couldn't believe it. I could buy a hot dog and two virtually's, which is a hot dog for like $5 or whatever it was. He couldn't believe it. Oh, that's so funny. And then the big gulp, you invested one time. You know, it's like, wow. That would never happen in Mexico.

People would go, refill it and sell it outside. All right. But you know what I mean? For them it's free. For us it's free. It's like, I buy it one time, I just go, refill it, sell it. But you were 21 and homeless for two months. I felt more like a tourist.

Because there's a lot of people in Europe, they walk all over Europe and they sleep anywhere. You know what I mean? And so I never felt homeless. It was just a moment that I needed to go through. I was on the border for two weeks. That was hard. That was harder than being a homeless in America, by the way.

You know, because the cartelists can just keep napping and take you and you know what I mean? So there's a lot of risk that people don't understand. So when we come up here, just a little chance will be nice. Right. You know what I mean? Just like, hey, you made it like a Spartan race, I believe.

Right. You made it. Give us a shot. Just give us a shot. Just one shot. If we don't make it, just we put ourselves back. But if we make this country better, and then just give us a chance.

Yes. You know what I mean? And you certainly have. And you worked your way up. I love the quote that Jeff Kennedy say, ask now what the country can do for you, what can you do for the country? So there I am.

Wait, I want to go back to your day. You only just brush your teeth and say hello to your girl. None of that. I went and walked out. Five AM. All right, so what time is it now? Like seven? Six thirty?

No, six o'clock. Six o'clock. It's only one hour into your day. See, and then I walk the dogs. But but his walking the dogs is hours. Two hours, two hours, two hours in the morning. That's your walk. Yeah, two hours in the morning.

And it's Caesar walking the dogs. So I'm sure it's like a run in these. It's like the immigration is following us. And this is the, and this is all. You gotta go guys. Are you guys on, only on your property? This is like out and about. No, this, I go to the property after.

Sometimes I do interviews like this, but then at eight AM we go to the gym. You know, my girl and I. Yeah, so we do that. So after your two hour walk with the dog, the animals, now he goes to the gym at eight AM with his woman. Yeah. Then Andre, under my 25 year old comes in

and then he does what I used to do back then, you know, which is now the mental stimulation and all of that stuff. I just love the walk part of it. Yeah. You know what I mean? That's like my spiritual stuff and instinctual stuff. Sure.

And so now you're working out though. And then I go, yeah, I do, I go to work out with my girl. Okay. That's how we start our day. Yeah. Her reach was long. Really?

Her ritual of waking up in the morning. Her ritual. Yeah. What does she do? You have to invite her one day. Really? I want to know what she does. It's like hours.

Hours. Wow. Yes. What does she read? She drinks the coffee. No, no, she doesn't drink coffee. She doesn't drink wine, coffee, nothing. It's just all like meditation stuff.

Meditation. Do you meditate? At this point though, have you eaten yet? Or no? Oh, shake, yeah. Shake, okay. Okay, get ready. She does the shake.

She does the shake. Okay. You have the life of a dog. You wake up. You've run for two hours. Yeah, and then you go work out more. Yeah. And now you want to eat something.

You must be hungry. By the time that I come back, yes. I definitely, yeah. And then you take a nap? It's a lot of exercise. Sometimes I do take a nap. She does take a nap all the time, but I just, from there, after we come back,

have breakfast, I go to the ranch. So right now, I should be at the ranch. Then you're working with animals. Yeah. You're working with the emus, the alpacas, the llamas, the donkey and everybody. Then we go for a four-hour walk. You know what I mean?

He's walking another walk. You got a two-hour walk, the gym and then a four-hour walk. You're an animal. You are an animal. We're all animals. Yeah. We all have that instinctual self. Right.

You know what I mean? So the Olympians, when people go to the Olympics, that's a human as its best animal form. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. Well, I've been meaning to ask you this question for like a decade. And Tom and I have discussed this

just between the two of us. What breed of dog do you think you would be? All of them. Yes, I want to be a mutt. Oh! Yes, I have all their superpowers. I've never heard that answer before. Yeah, I want to be all of them.

Yeah, because I mean, Newfoundland's are amazing, Jack Russell's are amazing. High energy, that's a high energy dog. Yeah, I'm on. I would have guessed pit bull because I know you love rehabilitating those guys. No, the reason why I enter

rehabilitating pit bulls and actually, you know, having a pit bull as my right hand, daddy. That's right, I know daddy. It's because people were, when I came to America, people were scared of the breed,

which is another form of racism, right? But in the 70s, people were afraid of dobermans. Oh, really? I didn't know that. Yeah, the dobermans, the dobermans have the same reputation of the pit bulls now. And then the rod dwellers became the next breed that people were afraid of. That's right.

And if you go back into the 60s, then the German shepherds were the people they were afraid of. So every 10 years, a different breed gets to be labeled as dangerous. So the pit bulls don't deserve the label. No. And if a...

Neither Mexicans. Neither do Mexicans, no. Mexicans are nice and they're human and treat them as such. But if the, so the pit bulls, if a pit bull, let's say, is, you know, given birth to and left alone, would it behave in a...

Survival. It's just survival mode. Food, water, shelter, family. So all that aggression that people associate, a lot of people associate with pit bulls, they're like, you gotta watch the fuck out with a pit bull. Is that merited in any way? It's racism.

No, the thing is, is power, okay? You're born with certain power. Aggression is an accumulation of negative physical energy and the wrong mental way of dealing with things. Then you can become aggressive. Okay. You see what I mean? So can any human become aggressive?

Absolutely. Is it a race related? No. You see what I'm saying? So where does it come from? Well, how do you create this aggression? You see it? So are you exercising?

No. Are you having positive thoughts? No. Are you loving yourself every day and loving others? No. Well, you're more likely to become aggressive. Oh wow. Aw.

You see how you body, you mind, you heart. I feel like that's how I got aggressive. That is. Well, my husband, it's so funny. I have a stand-up comedy I call Mother Inferior on Netflix and I reference you because I am like, you see as I'm in line to my husband. I use cold methods of energies.

I am the fuck leader. And I also maintain my husband, right? I have to feed him, exercise. I milk him every now and then to get the sexual poison out. Otherwise it gets very aggressive. Yeah, of course. Of course. That's how we say I love you.

Yeah. What do you mean? Man, for us, mating, mating, mating to us is love. That's right. I learned that from Dr. Laura. Yeah, mating to us is love. Yes. Yeah, so a lot of times we just wanna express our love to it.

Thank you. That way, yeah. See, I knew my theory had some kind of merit. Oh my God. Yeah. I can't believe this. Okay. Now.

I let her believe all these things. First of all. No, first of all. So, bitsy. That's a good thing to believe. Yeah, I love that. So I trained bitsy using your principles. What are your impressions of her?

Does she seem aggressive to you? Are you scared of her? What kind of behavior are all issues? What's your... I love the trust. I love the calmness. She trusts you. She's very social.

Well, what makes you social is that you also very respectful. You know what I mean? So, anti-social people are disrespectful. So true. Yeah, so you have to have the three, the trust, the respect, the love. And then you can call yourself social. Because you're gonna approach things in a calm way.

You're gonna keep distance. Because you're gonna be able to assess and evaluate how the person feels. Right. You know what I mean? Right, right. You have that ability to... Yeah, so if the person needs affection,

then you provide affection. If the person needs to be listened to, then you provide a hearing. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, so it's the trust, the respect, and the love. That is what makes you social. Right. Tranquilo, tranquilo.

Tranquilo. How upset do you get when you see people walking their dogs in baby carriages? I saw a woman in our neighborhood with three Yorkies that were able-bodied. They weren't like elderly Yorkies in a baby carriage. How do you feel when you see that? Capitalism.

Capitalism, yeah. Listen, some dogs do need strollers. Yes, that's what I'm saying. Some dogs do need wheels. There's a ladder, a handicap. So yeah, it's just, yeah, sometimes people just want to fulfill their emptiness. Like, empty nesters, they do that a lot.

I'm gonna be doing that. They do that a lot. So in Taiwan, you see that a lot. They do it for the heat, and they do it for the rain. Oh, I can see that. You see what I mean? So they get too hot, it gets too wet, but they still want to go outside

and put a dog in a stroller. So you see more dogs on strollers than children. Can I ask you, is it possible to train Betsy, our Brussels Grafane, to be a killer? Like, could we tell her, could we train her to be like a super aggressive, like guard dog? No. It's not possible.

No, you do that to the dogs who are actually born to do protection direction, right? So those are the ones that are born to be in the front. So if you have a front of the pack, and then those can be what people call guard dog, police dog, military dog. And that's usually in certain breeds though, correct? No.

It can be any dog that fits that. A chihuahua? You could train a chihuahua to be a protector? Obviously the capabilities are going to be very little because it's going to bite your finger or your nail. Well, you know what I mean? So you better die of something, but it's not going to kill you.

Speaking of capabilities. Let's look at this real quick. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. This is monkey. That's a Belgian Malinois. Oh man.

See, this guy right here. That's amazing. So this guy can do tricks, okay? Now, Belgian Malinois are actually, that's right. Do you know how many people say, I wish my husband can do it. Yeah. Yeah.

Well wait, can this dog like, can this change role in the park? This is not a front of the pack. This is not a front of the pack. This is the middle of the pack. Middle of the pack. Yeah, that's why you can do tricks. I mean, it's such an adorable thing to watch.

This is a middle of the pack dog. So this guy in the military will not do it. Wow. How is the dog able to do this? Yeah. How do you train it? This is a working type breed, you know what I mean? So this is like the new German shepherd

of the military world. Uh-huh. Yeah, so this guy's, the mind just wants to do something, jump, whatever, whatever it is. So to them, this is okay. This dog, individually, are you saying this? The breed.

The breed, okay. Like Border Collies, you know, so a lot of people say, well, Border Collies are the smart breed in the world. The reason why you can train Border Collies easier is because they were bred to look in for the sheep. You see it? So you can train people that are not looking at you.

Right. You see, as you can train me if I look at you. So if you have a breed that is already staring at you because there's no sheep, then you can do whatever you want. Interesting. So for those of you just listening and weren't watching, there is a dog that, you train this.

You train monkey. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Monkeys belongs to Omar. Oh, okay. Well, this dog can lift at his leg and urinate it into a toilet, close the lid, and flush the toilet. No drops either.

No drops. No drops. I mean, I didn't even know that was possible. Here's like a more general question that I've always, I've always, you know, you see this done different ways, but I've never actually gotten like the response of like how it should be done. When someone has a dog that's going to the bathroom inside.

Yeah. What is the right response to let's say seeing, okay, my dog just peed on my carpet. What are you supposed to do? Well, I think we have to rewind that tape, you know, because everybody wants to correct the dog, but to me is more, let's correct the human, you know? So the right thing to do is let the dog fast, all right,

and don't give him water after six p.m. So the bladder is empty and the stomach is empty. There's no food. So that way, when you give the food the next day and water the next day, you know, they're five to 30 minutes later, you have to take them to the place that you want them to use the bathroom.

Okay. Good. That's what makes them disciplined. That's what makes them understand. So as soon as I finish eating, the human was medical and relieved myself here. But if a dog and nobody's supervising or nobody's guiding the dog, you have to go.

Yes. You know, you gotta go. Yeah. And so that's not the fault, or that's not the fault of the dog. What you're saying right now seems very logical, but I feel like millions of people don't think like that. At least in astronauts have to train themselves

to use the bathroom at a certain time. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? People, they do sports. They have to take a water. People, they do marathons. They don't just drink water all the time. You understand?

So you have to train your bladder. You know, you have to train your, yeah, you have to train your chest system. What's the most advanced like trick or thing you've seen a dog train to do? I bet you've seen this right. No, this is amazing. I was wondering if there's something else you've seen.

Incredible. I mean, Omar had a dog named Jumpy and my son Calvin had a show called Mutton Stuff. And that dog was, I mean, that dog was, he was able to write his name. What? Yes. With a painting thing, you know?

It's just his name, Jumpy, he will put the J that you can see in my life. I don't train dogs. Right, right, right. I rehabilitate dogs, you know? So this thing is like, it's incredible to me. I want to be a dog trainer. That's why I came to America,

but I saw the opportunity to rehabilitate and train people, so I just focused on that. And what's your first, like what's your, what goes through your mind when somebody brings you a dog and they go, this dog is aggressive. This is a really aggressive dog. This, I mean, they're, they're unborn aggressive. You're never gonna see it.

So you start going like, I'm just gonna observe this dog for a while. Not for a while. I mean, it's very obvious. There's only three things where a dog will become unstable. Lack of exercise, lack of mental stimulation, lack of affection, but in America, the dog never lacks an affection.

Right. You know, most of the people, the circle they have is affection, affection, affection. Interesting. You know, so body, mind, heart, but people just do heart, heart, heart, heart. Right, it's like a child. They treat the dog like a cute little.

Worse, because even, at least kids go to soccer, play, practice, baseball, practice. You know what I mean? Oh, here's a question I've been dying to ask you. I've noticed in the dog training world, and I know you're a re-billet, you're not, but there is a certain, there are two camps. There are people that reward dogs with treats,

the treat trainers, and then there's more of what I think you teach people. The traditional ones. Yeah, and I loathe a treat trainer. We had a treat trainer come originally with FIFO, and they take the clicker, and then you click, and then you hand the dog, and it's like, I don't even understand why.

So now you're training the dog to eat snacks every 30 seconds is what it seems like to me. It seems very counter-intuitive to treat training. A treat is your affection at the right time. Right. You know what I'm saying? A treat is opening the door, that's a treat. A food is a treat, water is a treat.

Resting with them is a treat. Everything is a treat. But you're the biggest treat. But so what happens with the treat trainers, they don't tell you everything. Environment is a treat, yourself is a treat, your energy could be a treat or not a good treat. Your timing can be bad too.

You see what I'm saying? So the tools doesn't change the behavior is that you understand how to use it. Right. You know what I mean? Yes, and at the same time, at one point the dog have to learn to do it for you, for the loyalty of the family.

Right. Otherwise they get stuck. If you don't have food, I don't do it. Right. And so a lot of times they don't comprehend how to use food as a motivation. At the same time, it's three types of motivation. Toys, food and yourself.

Some dogs don't want food, they don't want toys, they just want you. So you have to learn how to use you. That's, yeah, I never thought of that. Yeah. Is there a proper way, because there's theories on this that are widely circulated to greet a dog in general?

But just watch dogs how they do it. No size ears, social distance first. Dogs never do it. If they do that, they can lead into tension, okay? So listen, when a horse meets a dog, he doesn't want to meet the dog too close. They do it at a distance. So social distance means respect.

You hear the word social distance now because COVID. Yes. But in the animal world, that's exactly how they begin. So that's how a human should do it too. Yeah, that's why you go, no touching, no talking, no eye contact and then the dog approaches me and then I claim my space. So I provide calm, confident and a scent.

So my scent is my name and my calm, confident is my last name. Interesting. Have you ever seen how a human is supposed to greet a wolf? You wanna see this video? I have a few wolves. As I enter the wolf's territory, I am so excited. I crouched down and made sure to keep my energy calm. It's important to greet a wolf openly

so they can learn everything about you and trust you. This means keeping low so you are less frightening. When wolves greet, they will want a lick inside your mouth. This is perfectly normal for them and this is what they do to one another on a daily basis. If you can tolerate it, you should allow this as they will trust you more and can learn everything about you as a person.

Body movements should be calm and fluid. Sharp movements will frighten and shock them, making you look threatening, so gently, gently is the answer. This is why women are often more readily accepted by wolves than men, as men naturally exhibit heavier movements, have a taller stature and a deeper voice. Interesting. You seem to recoil quite a bit

when the wolf was digging out her mouth. You don't have to do that. No? What? No, you don't have to do that. How will the wolf know you? Yeah, how does it know if it doesn't taste you? Listen, they can taste your skin, okay?

They can taste this, but you don't want it on your mouth? No, like I said, no, you don't have to. You're not a wolf. Yeah. You're not a wolf. Like she's not smelling the wolf, but either. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Like she's keeping her. Yeah. But you said that you have wolves. Yeah, I have rehabilitated. Many have hybrids. Hybrids. Hybrids, which is 80% wolf and 20% dog. Oh, wow.

Yeah, so when we did the show, some people had, you know, had the wolves hybrids as pets. And if you're not walking a dog, this thing has to go longer, longer period of time. Walking. Just so they don't want to escape. Yeah. So what was consistent about this hybrids was

they would bend any kind of fence. They would jump any kind of fence just to get out because they won't need it to travel. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That's it. But most importantly, it seems like this lady was just trying to cop a feel with these wolves, right?

Listen, I don't do that stuff. I just send another dog to do it. Yeah. Yeah, I don't do it. So my dogs would introduce me to this wolf because the wolf know who rounds this pack. Oh. You know what I mean?

So I don't have to open my mouth. That's just in the pack. What's your point of view on pup play? Are you familiar with pup play that people do? Okay, pups, we've had a bit of a rest. This is like. Time out for some. They've exercised.

This is after they're exercising. Training. What's involved in your pup plays? It first seems really simple because, you know, most people think you're just getting on all fours, waddling around and going wolf, wolf and bark, bark. But it's really so much more complicated. It's an addiction, I guess, in a way.

I feel there is a dog in me. I feel I have to live two lives in some ways. It is kind of like being part of a secret club. For some people, there's sexy time involved, but that's not the whole essence of it. Oh. So he's kind of the Caesar of this world. Hell no.

Hell no. Hell no. See, that's like human shit right there. You're like, you're never going to see dogs. Let's just wear human clothing. And behave like humans. Yeah. That's how crazy humans are.

Have you seen this movie? No, no, no, I'm not attracted to these kind of movies. It's a pup. You're going to be using it as an active sense, activating those memories, associating with your pup activities so that one width of your mast is growing and you're beginning to snap into pup mode.

He's bored out of his mind. You think so? Yes. He's bored out of his mind and confused. This is three things that make humans do crazy shit, right? Yes. It's chaos when they have chaos in their life and happiness and confusion.

Yes. Every day. Yes. Are we going to see more of this? Yes. A good strong smell of your owner's underwear. When you feel like it, when you're pleasuring yourself. Importantly though.

Oh my God. There's activities that you're going to be doing to help build up your scent. And the first one in first collar training is to know your own smell once a day when you wake up in the morning. Oh, this guy have a different ritual than me. If you do.

If you put it in the shower, you can put it in the deodorant cologne. This is a whole lane. Know your smells. Of like, this is pup play. This is what this is considered. That's where we got that mask. Yeah.

So this thing is real? This is real. They even get tails sometimes. You know? This is real. Hold on to your couch. Up. Up.

Up. Good puppy. Spread it down. Come. Come. Would you say that his energy is balanced right now? He's calm. He's fucking unstable.

He's kind of unstable. He's kind of unstable right now. This guy is so confused. Yeah. You come because you need a tail, haven't you? Yeah. You come because you need a tail? A tail.

You know, like a dog. Is this a tail you'd like us? Is it like a grooming thing? Yeah. Because you must chose that tail. Oh my God. This guy's are now Mexican at all. Oh, that's what I'm looking for.

What? You ever seen that on the farm growing up? No. No. No. No. No. They wouldn't order you if you do this shit.

Boy. You talk to make it some crazy noises. Oh my God. This is sick casting. Wow. There's also another lane of animal. Caesar needs a brain. This guy's need major rehab.

This is pony fetish festival. What? In events and classes, just the same as real horses. Help me. Get it. Have you ever worked with a horse like that? Yeah, you have all kinds of animals on your ranch. Where does this humans live?

Where are they from? What kind of breed are they? Who are their parents? I'll tell you this. Who are their parents? It's all white people. And their home was not safe, peace and love. No.

And there was too much affection, affection, affection. Oh, that's for sure. Definitely no trust, respect or love here. Yeah, there's none. Honesty, integrity, loyalty is zero. I mean, you can see it. Oh my God. Easy rents are very competitive.

Just like a regular horse. Oh, there you go. You're familiar with BTK? No. People go down over and don't. No. And it looks like. Oh.

The competition gets pretty. Everybody's out of shape on there. Yeah. Too bad they don't walk like ponies, huh? Yeah. Those six hour walks they need. Wow, the thing is like, now even girls are practicing this thing.

Yeah. I thought it was just for guys. Crazy guys, but now the girls are in it. Yeah, right? Guys are usually the desperate. Yeah. What a weirdo. What if somebody brought their human pup

and they're like, this pup is misbehaving and it was just the guy who was going, whoo, whoo, would you? You know, that has happened to me. What? That has happened. No. I'll stop it.

I just walk away, yeah. A person brings you a human. Pretending to be a dog. Pretending to be a dog. Like a kinky thing. And you're like. Mom, my voice is kinky. I didn't get that feeling, but yes,

they start behaving like a dog and sit down and doing that thing and they want to take a picture. Ah, no. Oh. That's right. It's like, yes. And it's only in one part of the world. It's only in one part of the world.

I can't tell you where. Oh. But it's only in one part of the world. England. I'm not going to tell you where. But it's like, oh man. Do you mean Oregon? No, I've never been in Oregon.

Actually once. I rescued a dog named Diablo from Oregon. Really? So that episode, yeah. No. I went to a rescue organization and it was as loveable. So I thought it was going to be a pit bull, right? And I said, okay, so show me what pit bull

has given you a problem. So all the pit bulls around there were like perfectly fine. And then the lady said, no, they didn't tell you. No, they didn't tell me what. It's him. And it was this fat chihuahua just walking around here. Oh yeah, I remember. Diablo.

So this guy, man, this guy would just grab kibbles. Kibbles, right? And he would spit it in front of the pits so they don't look at the kibble. So then all these pits, they were against the wall. And he would just walk around here. That was him right there? Yeah, Diablo.

No, that's how fat he was on the. Yeah. Yeah. I remember. Oh, and you guys even did a funny animation for him, didn't you? Like, it's a long time. Yeah, it's a long time.

But that dog lived happily thereafter. Thank God. And he was intimidating the pipples. That's what he did for a living. Really? So they couldn't deal with it. These people were able to deal with the pits and the whole thing.

But with Diablo, they will get bitten. Interesting. Yeah. Now I also read that you trained Oprah Winfrey's dog. Did they have personal chefs as well? Yes. Yes, of course. That's normal.

What would she, what was she thinking? Is it kind of a thrill though to get the Oprah call? It seems like most people would kind of. The thing is when I saw Oprah for the first time and I was in England with California and she was talking about a segment about how to say no. Because in the Latino community, you don't learn how to say no.

You always say yes. You know what I mean? So people can come at any time and you can't say no. In America, they have to sketch you. You have to sketch people to come and see you. Nobody can just come and knock on the door. The Latinos is, you can't say no. So when she did that segment, I said,

oh man, that feels so good to say no. So I said, you know, one day I'm gonna go meet her because I need to give her back because I saw her with her dog Sophie, you know? In a previous episode, I said she has a problem with the dogs and one day I'm gonna be able to help her because I wanna pay her back, you know, pay it forward. And so years later, I was invited to help Oprah with Sophie.

Sophie was 11 at that time. So for 11 years, Sophie has been aggressive to other dogs to the point that she had to keep her golden retriever separate. Oh. You know, some people when they have like three, four, five dogs, they have like a maximum security type of house all.

So they have to bring, you know, dogs at a certain time. So that's exactly how she was living. Wow. So what was the remedy for Sophie? Well, you know, Oprah is a perfect example for a lot of women when you see a confident woman, right? So she was always calm, she was always confident. But when she was around her dog, she became fearful.

So Sophie will feel this energy and become protective of Oprah. Aha, got you. So instead of seeing it from an instinctual, intellectual point of view, she will look at it from an emotional point of view. So you really had to get Oprah to change her behavior. Yeah, yeah.

So we did an episode on that. Yeah. So I have to let her know that in the human world, she was a pack leader. In the animal world, she was not the pack leader. Interesting. Then Stedman just went back like, ooh. You just stole that to Oprah as like Stedman.

Yeah, yeah. And did she make the change? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because she just made the correlation of calm, confident. Yes. You know? So the only reason all these people follow her is because her energy is calm, confident, love, and joy.

You know, Christina, you said something at the beginning. Like, do you, does it matter? Because you hear it a lot, the people talk to babies and children a certain way, and the dogs, come here. Like, do you tell people to stop doing that, or does that? No, it's at a time for it. It's a time for it. Yeah, so I said, calm, confident, love, joy.

So the baby talk is at the end. Okay. You know what I mean? Right, yeah, at the end. So never do the baby talk when the dog is at a level 10 of physical energy and is bored out of his mind. Yeah. Drain that energy, and then baby talk as much as you want.

Gotcha. Because by then, the dog is at a low level of energy. So if you're gonna, you're not gonna elevate him to the point that he becomes hyperactive. Right. Frantic, yeah. Frantic. This dog, Bitsy, she can walk about a half a mile.

And then she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, you know, the break goes so fast, like when he's gone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Too hot. I don't think she could do your two hour walk. She couldn't. She needs a stroller.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, with us, we bring one of the dogs carries something, you know, it has a carrier, like what those people are doing. Yeah. But, I don't know. Natural wake. Same thing, yeah.

This is very natural. What do you think? Perfectly natural. What else is gonna, okay, so I do have one behavioral thing I wanted to ask you about with Miss Bitsy. Yeah. She's a great dog. When we got her, I was, I, so we had an older guy, Fifo,

and we got Bitsy just as I found out I was pregnant with our first son. So, long story short, there are two little boys running around, although Bitsy's grown up with babies her whole life. I think they drive her crazy at times. And our older boy, Ellis was blowing a whistle, do, do, do, and it was freaking her out.

And we were in Ellis's room and Bitsy jumped up on his bed and was looking right at him and just peed on the bed. This is like a media. I was just hearing this whistle. She was like, and she just pissed. And I'm like, oh, that was a direct message, no? Wasn't it a message like, hey guys, I've reached my threshold.

Yeah, knock it off. Knock it off. Because she's never growled. She's never so much as growled as our children, but she was stressed, right? I mean, I imagine that's what happened. Yeah. Yeah.

Sounds like it. That was the only thing she could have done. There's a lot of dogs, when people are too excited, they pee. Oh, right. You see what I mean? There's a lot of dogs that if you move too fast, they also pee. That's what she did.

She wasn't pee, but she does that. That means you're moving too fast, or you're doing something too fast. Too fast. And then they can't control the bladder. Oh. You see it? So that's just telling, listen, what you're doing

is making me feel this way, to the point that I can't control my bladder. So she got overwhelmed and stressed out. Yes, stressed out. And then we've had her pee on her bed like two times, once as a puppy, and then like, or maybe, yeah, right? Didn't Bitsy just pee on her comforter a while back?

Yeah. What's that all about? That's a message. You put her too soon in the bed. Yeah. Because you have to train the bladder. Remember, when a dog is with their mom, the mom cleans the pee in the poop.

Right. And then slowly, the mom pushes them outside. So they learn to use the bathroom outside. So they don't know how to wait four hours in the beginning. Right. The max they can hold is two hours. That's why, when the dog is getting trained, the bladder, when you train the bladder,

it's best for the puppy not to come and sleep with you right away. And most people, as soon as they get a puppy, they want to sleep with them. Right. You know what I mean? But then the bladder is not trained. So it's more likely for the puppy to have a mistake.

Right. So I was wondering, oh, but she did this as an adult. This was like a... It could be a habit. Three months ago. If they develop a habit, then their memory comes back. Oh, and then she... If I don't think it would be a sign of habit for her.

No, random occurrence. If she peed on her comforter, I was like, that's... She was drinking beer that we... She's like... So, you know, she had like six beers that they didn't think it was kind of like sense. It wasn't in her character. And she sleeps in her own area at night.

She doesn't sleep on her bed. She sleeps in the laundry room, but anyway. She chose the place? No, basically she has a form of IBS because of her genetics, like she's so inbred. So she was on the bed, but she would get diarrhea in the middle of the night. Pretty regularly, too.

It's horrible. It's pretty bad. But then what happens is we had her sleep in another room and after a while, you're like, man, I miss having her here. And she hasn't been going. So you bring her back and then like, you have diarrhea again. So you're like, all right.

But how many times do you guys feed her? Twice a day. There's six times. Six times. It's like a buffet you have at home. She has a... Regular times. What is it?

Like five o'clock at night and then in the morning at 8.30. And we switched her food to help her digestive issues. And then the vet referred, recommended these like hemp oil droplets on the food. For relaxer? No. She said it would help the digestion.

The digestion. She's been really good with it. She's been good for a while. What kind of food did she eat? Solid or... It was originally solid. And then this one is like a canned, but it's like a moist, like a wet food.

Science ID. Yeah, science ID. Right, right, right. I don't know. What do you think of that? Should I be feeding her steak? No, no, that's good. And lots of chocolate.

We always give her chocolate. Snickers. So good to them. Yeah. There was a... It's a Hungarian tradition. Yeah, that's what we did. We did, when we, like so,

she's from a breeder. The first one we had was from a rescue. When we went to the breeder, it was like a Brussels fanatic. And they had like a ranch. And there was paintings of them with Brussels and photos of them. It's gonna be me.

And then she had like... They're sweaters. Oh yeah. In the house, they had like 15 Brussels. Outside, they had 35 and... Jesus. And then like, you know, dog would pee and they just have like mops throughout the house to clean.

Like it was a whole thing, right? Oh, okay, okay, okay. And when we picked her up, the lady was like, just so you know what to feed her. And I was like, what? And she handed me like a binder. And it was like every morning, I scrambled, we'd do scrambled eggs

and we diced this up and you diced up some squash. And I was like, what? And I mean, it was like pages. And then she was like, and then you can do this. And I was like, you feed them every day? It was a full like chef. Yeah, many a thing. I've never seen anything like it.

And I was like, I'll definitely do this. I did. Yeah. No, they're like that kind of breeders. Like they go crazy for the breed. Yeah. They go crazy like that. I mean, do you recommend cooking like that?

Or it doesn't work? Yeah. That level? Yeah. Of course. Do you cook that kind of stuff? Really? Yeah.

I only have five now. You know, I used to have 65. So even back then I used to cook for it. What I love about the cooking part is after the exercise that we do, they're freaking hungry. Yeah. Okay. So then they know the certain smells are for them.

Yes. And so then they come to the kitchen and they make them wait at a distance and the practice comes as I'm cooking. So it's a very Italian preparation. So to me it's a very romantic thing. Yeah, that's true. You see what I'm saying?

And you infuse your scent in the food. I've seen you do that. Exactly. I like it. It's touchy. So what types of foods do you, would you prepare? Livers and anything that is internal. Internal.

Yeah. I caught some chicken feed and stuff like that. Wow. Yeah, like real stuff. All right, I should try this. No, they love it. Listen, they love it. A little bit of rice, not a lot.

Don't go crazy with the rice. They're not, they don't need that kind of carbs. No carbs. They're protein people. You know what I mean? So, and it's not a lot. When you feed that much, when you feed that kind of food,

you don't eat that much. I'm worried that I would upset her. No, you don't have to change it. You don't have to change it. No, because you have a, your dog has an incest in a problem. My dog doesn't have an incest. We have to keep it consistent with her.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Poor girl. She's a great dog though. I love her. She's the best. Yeah. Just that butthole problem.

Geez. Her butthole gives us so much drama. Yeah, she has to have those anal glands expressed more than most dogs. Yeah. Yeah. Did you groom her? Yeah.

Well, I take her to the groomer. Yeah, I don't groom her, sorry. Every other week. Well, I'm a groomer, I like it. You like it? You do that too. Yeah, you're not like a regular dude, Ben. Yeah, well, when it comes to dogs,

I'm not regular, you're right, but I like to do everything. Yeah. Does your lady love dogs as much as she has to? Yes, of course. My ex didn't, my ex didn't. And is that why? That's why you're not together.

I don't know why God put that in front of me, but that is, Tell me everything. That is strange to be with Caesar Milan. Listen, she got pregnant, and that was it. That was it. I knew it.

And I love Andre, but that was, I was going to ask God for the first one. Was it incompatible? Yeah. Yes, it was just horny. What was her name? Iscilia? I don't even want to know.

Okay, let's not say her name. She's going to appear someone. It's like Voldemort, yeah. So you guys married, and yes, she wasn't into the dogs. No, she wasn't. That's what it was. I had a feeling, and she was probably like,

you're always going with these fucking dogs. I don't speak English. I was building a business, and I was a dad. So I would take my kids with me. Gotcha. Yeah. 65 dogs, I have to make sure.

65. 65 dogs. Not on your home premises. Yes. So I will bring the dogs home. So I will work for five a.m., five a.m. to 11 p.m. every day.

Okay, so seven days a week, five a.m. to 11 p.m., that's how I build this thing. And so when I get home, I will bring the most aggressive ones that I was working with. That was rehabilitating inside the apartment, this one bedroom apartment.

And then the other ones were staying in the van. So they're much, you know, middle of the pack, back of the pack, they can just pile up. But the guys who need a supervision, then they have to come with me. So, and then I will go to sleep at 12, wake up at five.

Oh my God. But that's like years and years, way before Dog Whisper. Grinding away. Yeah. And then how did the show come about? The show came about because LA Times followed me around, you know,

and it's a Mexican guy from South Central to Inglewood. They walk all these dogs off leash. So they used to call me the Mexican guy who can walk a pack of dogs. That's a title for sure. That's a title, you know, in America, they describe you as what the race you are. Yeah.

And so, so the LA Times, you know, one day, you know, say, we're looking for this guy. So they found me and I'm walking and the ladies say, I would like to follow you around for three days. Everything you do from the moment you wake up. So at the end of the conversation,

she asked me, so what would you like to do next? And I said, I would like to have a TV show or radio show, you know, and because I want to teach what I know to people. So she wrote it down and the newspaper came on a Sunday, but Monday was a line of producers outside. Wow. In South Central.

What is this show about? But it's beautiful. I mean, she did an amazing piece. Wow. She did an amazing, amazing piece. And I read that they wanted you to just sign your life story rights away. And you were like, nah, brah.

Well, yeah, you know, you don't understand, you know, not everybody, at least by the motor code. That's right. And so, and... Yeah, you were right to think that though. Yeah, smart. Of course. Yeah, so, yeah, so it didn't happen.

Good for you. Well, you know, eventually it will happen, but I'm okay right now. Can I ask one, fine, I know we've got to wrap up soon, right? But my favorite thing in the world is when you act like a dog. Not like that, not like those guys right there. That's exactly what you do.

No, that's not exactly what I do. Not like that. No way, Nora. But when you would be like, when you would be like, you know, when you do it, I just love it. Well, yeah, anybody who's had dogs, actually when you do those things,

they immediately register. See, the thing is, the thing, the reason why I learned to do that, besides, you know, obviously I watch them and I imitate them and all of that. It's because people were not able to see them and their dogs. You see it?

So, and then I will imitate what the dog is doing. You see? That's my favorite. I will imitate the behavior and so that, oh, you're right. Because they're not looking at it as what it is. You know, they're living in the story. So it's reality versus story. Right, because you're putting your own human story

on what the dog's behavior means. For you. For the owners, for the owners, yeah. So the dog tells you the truth, the human tells you the story. Ah, you know what I mean? So it's like the dog immediately sees that we're not doing exercise here,

we don't have rules, bonds, limitations, and we get affection anytime we want. So the dog is gonna tell you the truth. The human is gonna tell you the story. The human is gonna tell you, I read all your books, I watch all your shows, I already hire all these people and my dog's still not listening. Right.

So they still think it's the dog. Right. So if you, when people actually do what I say, they will never blame the dog. They will take responsibility of their energy, their activities, and their habits. It's fascinating stuff, man. You really, everything, it's like philosophy,

listening to you talk about it. It is. I think that's why I'm so attracted to your work, because it's so thoughtful, it's so layered, it's so meaningful, it wasn't just like, give the dog a treat when it does something right, it's so counterintuitive to me. And you really do, you do train people

and I feel like I've learned so much from you. I just wanted to thank you because FIFO changed our lives, that dog completely opened us up and he's the reason we have two beautiful children today, I think, because he made us love and be responsible for something outside of ourselves. You know, and we really, we love taking care

of that guy and of this one too. Anyway, you're fantastic. Thank you. I'm just so glad you exist. Where should people go for more Caesar's website? Caesar's Wait, that's come. Caesar's Wait.com. Yeah, where I put also Instagram and Facebook.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, this was a thrill, man. My best. Go to Caesar's Way and yeah, thanks for all the years of entertainment and information. And there's 10 new episodes coming up. There are? What?

Yeah, surprise. Yeah. 10 new episodes. 10 new episodes, yeah, we put in the pack together. Nice. Not you. So we're going back and there's a lot of new, a lot of new stuff that we're doing.

My kids are 25 and 21, so I'm putting the pack. When I started it was just me, now I have a pack. I forget, where does it air? National Geographic. National Geographic, okay. Yeah, Nadia Wilde. Okay, Nadia Wilde. Yes.

And before we go, just one time, I'd like you to grade my. Tss, tss, tss. That's great, that's great. Let's get a good timing. Good intention. Good intention. Yeah.

Don't forget, don't forget this. Oh yeah, that's the one I like there. Yeah. Tss, tss, tss, tss. You have to use your body. That's right. You block out the body. It really works.

That's the thing. Block out with the body. The thing is, this charges you. This points the direction where the energy goes. Uh-huh. And then this attracts the ears. So as you're turning yourself on. Yeah.

In a good way. I love it. That is so, not like these guys. Yeah. But that is so true. When I see my boys doing monkey business in the yard, a mother can sense it. Just like your mother gets,

and all I have to do is go, hey! And then they stop what they're doing. And I just stand there. I don't even have to say shit. I just gave them the hey. Yeah. And now they just stop what they're doing. But the hey, what it means to the brain is snap out of it.

Yeah. Pay attention to me. And then the conversation is energy body language. That's right. And then you make it more animal-like. So it's easier for the brain to go to surrender. You don't want the fight, flight, avoidance. So when you use too many words,

you can actually send the human to fight, flight, avoidance. Yes. When you use very little words, you can send the human to surrender. So. Right. Surrender means the mind open and paying attention to you. Right, especially with small children. Because they are an instinctual way of being.

That's right. And the calmer you are, and you know. That's what you're telling them to be. That's right. Instead of being frantic. What are you doing? Yeah. How many times did I tell you?

Yeah. Now you're out of control. That's right. And then they go into a fight, flight, avoidance. You know what they see? You're out of control. They don't trust you, too. But remember, any being is controlled by instincts.

And what controlled instincts? Energy. So what's the outcome that you're looking for that? Surrender. Of what? Don't use the wrong energy. Right, so you're saying if you do, yeah. Calm, confident, love, joy.

Yeah. Yeah, calm first. Confidence is direction. Love is because they're doing it. And joy is because everybody's in tune again. Right. And that's the outcome you want. So you project that.

You only need four energies to live in this world. Calmness, confidence, love, and joy. Anything outside, you don't. Because if you have other energies, your life is going to be chaotic, unhappy, and confused. So nobody wants those three things. And then you put on latex. Puppets.

These guys are completely confused. And you smell your underwear every day. Learn your own smells. All snails. What a ritual, huh? That's pretty cool, huh? Oh, the world fools tell me that. Oh, my goodness.

Vas a volver un día para hacer mi hip hop que es español. Claro que sí, compadre. OK, eso. Es a way. Eso, cabrón. Hey. That was cool. Vamos a hacerlo en español.

Claro que sí, hay que enseñar a todo el mundo, ¿eh? Sí, claro. Especialmente los hombres latinos tenemos que aprender cómo conectarnos con la mujer, cómo conectarnos con la familia. Sí, tenemos que evolucionar. Sí, y creo que la audiencia, afuera ahí, puede aprender mucho de él.

Pues sí, es una forma diferente de pensar. Sí. Sí, me entiendo, es una forma diferente, más respetuosa, más cariñosa, donde uno se enfoca en la confianza de las cosas. Ya sabes, estás invitado. Gracias. Pues nos traemos unos tacos y unas cervezas.

Perfecto. Para que sea, para que sea bien latina. Pero bien latina. Sí, claro. Es que el latino, el latino no le gusta hablar sin comida. I can eat without food. Tú no estás invitado. You got to speak slower, OK?

She's trying to translate. I can understand Sabado Higante. I understand this shit, OK? Sabado Higante. Do you watch that? Do you like that? I used to, I used to. Yeah, I was with Don Francisco many times.

What? Don Francisco. You've been with Don Francisco? You've been on the show? Americano, yeah. Wow. Jump the boarder, everybody wants me. Yeah, then they're like, come back.

Yeah, these are jump the boarders. What were the segments? What did you do on Sabado Higante? Help people, help actors. Helping actors? Like with their dog stuff? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hilarious.

Would you go on Platanitos here? Yeah, it's kind of weird. Tom did that show. I poured beer down my pants. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, I was like, all right.

And then they were like, do it bigger. Yeah. Yeah, he's like those guys. Tidica Resanar. He's like, you know, because he's always saying things in double things. Oh, it's like double? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She's always like, yeah. And that's why his whole point is Platano. I thought it was a plantain. Well, plantain, platano, whatever. But it has that. Yeah, yeah. Gotcha. Shit.

The world, man. The world. She's weird. Dude, this was a blast. Thank you for coming. Thank you, guys. Appreciate it. Thank you so much.

We'll see you guys next week. The 1997 Rolling Stone magazine wrote a six and a half page article about me calling me the number one party animal in the country. It actually gets a little weirder. Shots, shots, shots, ween, shots, shots. I got loose hit a couple times. Shots, shots, shots, mean, shots, shots.

I'm just partying. I love her stone, option the rights to my life. I got offered my own owning show in Tallahassee. So then I try stand up. Don't remember that. Then I moved to New York. Don't remember that. And won the election.

Oprah called and wanted me to be on the show. Did you do drugs? Drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs. Is your dad wearing tidy whiteies? Drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs, drugs. I can't believe I'm being framed for this shit. What do you want? What's going on here?

Is this like an ambush? Shots, shots, shots, ween, shots, shots. I got loose hit a couple times. Shots, shots, shots, mean, shots, shots. This actually gets a little weirder. I understand you're the machine. Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots. Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots.

Shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots. Shots, shots, shots, shots.