Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - 580 - Your Mom's House with Christina P and Tom Segura

Episode Date: December 2, 2020

Did you miss the third special YMH LIVE event? You can still watch the full show on-demand until December 4th by going to https://ymhvirtual.com SPONSORS: - Go to https://Squarespace.com/MOM for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain! -If you’re feeling the pinch during the holiday season, find out how much you could save on home and auto insurance at https://Policygenius.com. - Download Best Fiends FREE today on the Apple App Store or Google Play - Go to https://SoloStove.com and get $10 off when you use promo code "mom" at checkout. - Go to https://Stamps.com, click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in MOM. - Go to https://Whoop.com/house and get your first month free when you sign up for a 6-month membership Jeans up! We got another solo ep with just Tim and Chris-Jeansa! The main mommies get into how they love to cancel family plans at the first instance of difficulty, Tom has difficulty sneezing, and they discuss the Mike Tyson vs Roy Jones Jr. boxing match. We then get into one of Tom's favorite subjects: old people relations and showing that to people. We get a sweet followup to Tom's colonoscopy, we get into a batch of cool guys (one of them being Rudy Giuliani), how dads love The Hunt For Red October, a disturbing batch of TikToks, and an update on the plastic chair collector! https://ymhstudios.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com/ https://www.facebook.com/yourmomshousepodcast https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

I have just signed an executive order to extend YMH live until this Friday at midnight. It really was a no-brainer. It's quite literally the best podcast on the internet. The ratings are tremendous and is number one across all platforms. You'd be a cool guy like Sleepy Joe to not watch it. You bet I'm coming up in there. I learned very early in my relationship with Tom that when he's about to sneeze and he's doing this whole thing, like, I can't acknowledge it.

I'm not allowed to look at him, which is exactly what you're doing. You're literally doing what you say. But I'm not looking at you or asking you about it. I'm telling the audience that I'm ignoring it right now. I was looking at the dove. I was not talking. Wait a minute, that is sad up to you. You're like, Hey, if there's one thing I've learned, if he's about to sneeze, I can't address it.

He's about to sneeze. Good morning, my jeans above 18. He's really been in our house this morning, the king. The king is really dominating the interwebs in our phones. And our hearts and minds. Absolutely. This is how we wake each other up in the morning. And we have some breaking news. Big breaking news.

And the morning I roll over, I go, good morning, my king above 18. And I start giving you pets like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. It's good fun. It is good fun. It's a good way to wake up. And I let you know, you know, put your feet on the ground, get you a shower, get you some coffee, get you a nice hot breakfast.

And then you're my beautiful queen. And then you know how beautiful you are. And I like that no bra look. And it'll do a little dance, have some fun with it. You know, make the king laugh. Make me laugh. Oh, that was funny to watch your tits bounce. I like when your tits bounce.

Just have fun with it. Oh, boy. Yeah. Oh, can I make an announcement? Yes. This week's episode entitled No Scrubs of Where My Mom's At podcast is where we discover Nadob's favorite movie is Drumline. So if you want to check that out. That's the original discovery.

Yeah. Yeah. That's very exciting. Very exciting news here at YMH Studios. We have a whole new website with all our information with all the shows, with all the store. It's going to be where we stream live shows, where we can drop new content. It's all at ymhstudios.com.

So when you get a chance, if you would, head on over there and check it out and try it out and get you a nice hot breakfast and go to ymhstudios.com. And that'll be the home of everything consolidated that comes out of these here studios. It was a great Thanksgiving week. It was. You know, we canceled our plans because Governor Newsom told us

that we weren't allowed to celebrate. Governor and also, you know what? Here's one of my things about COVID. And, you know, maybe you at home agree. As soon as the idea to do something with other people brings about any drama, I go, no, no, I'm done. I'm good. So like we were going to have some people over

and as soon as there was like pushback from one of the people, I was like, it's fine. It's fine. I know. You stay back, stay back. You can stay home. You can stay home. We cannot do this.

Easy, easy. I'm the same way. We were going to make a special trip to see my folks, which has its own concerns, but we had planned out a way to quarantine, stay safe, travel as safely as we could to see them. And then I got a little bit of drama from, you know, some family about, well, how come you can, I go, it.

Does it? It's over. No push, no push. We're not doing it. Done. So. Well, that's how Tom and I roll is, listen, I've decided, but from the time we went,

I think it was when we first got married was at 09 and we didn't have two pennies to rub together. And we went to Hawaii for Thanksgiving. Do you remember that? Yeah, it's a funny sentence. Well, it's true because we use like our Amex travel points. We have no money when we got married. And I remember that year going, wow, you can do that.

That was the best discovery. You can do that. And here's the thing, our kids are so young that it sucks to travel with them. As soon as they're of age, we're doing it again. And what you do is you leave on holidays and you tell people, God, I wish I could spend time with you. But the problem is I'm 5,000 miles away.

Oh, I wish I could. But also the realization that you don't have to suffer through the holidays. You can spend them with whomever you choose, you may eat whatever you like. Those points are the shit. If you don't, if you're not on the points game, this is not a new discovery,

but points can get you airfare. Oh yeah. They can get you a hotel stay. They can get you rental cars. You can do a lot with some credit card reward points. I know, because at the time we were using the credit card to buy airline tickets to work. And so we had to crew all these points.

You know, I don't know if I told you this or not. Uh-oh. But so. Oh no. At that time, we used, I remember now vividly, we used points for the airfare and for staying there. And the only thing we would really come out of pocket on would be the incidental charges,

which is like, you know, your meals and anything. And I had in my mind what it would be. And it was like seven or eight times that amount. Oh my God. It was Hawaii, when you go on, like everything, like you order coffee and eggs and they're like at $60. You're like, what? Spacation.

So yeah, but I remember that I had, I had that in my mind and then I was like, oh my God. And it took me like eight months to pay off that bill. Like I thought I would be paying at the next month. Whoops. Well, you know what's good, Tom, is that we're still as responsible now, you know what I mean? Like, yes, you bought a Ferrari, but when we got,

I'm sorry, Lamborghini, but when McDonald's fired us, you returned it. So that's cool. McDonald says you don't get 2.2 million. And then I told Lamborghini, you don't get 467,000. Yeah, but we really have made a pact with each other to not make ourselves miserable over the holidays. And I think it's really helped our marriage.

I don't know how anybody doesn't consider that. Or like when they invite your family over and you're like, no, no, stay with us. You and I have always been like, no, no, there's a hotel down the street. Like there's a mile away, there's a great courtyard Marriott. Yep.

And then you can rent a car and you come see us whenever we tell you can. That was, that's another one. That's a big one. Boundaries. You have to be fortunate enough to do, but I've done that where you go, no, I got you something. And they go, what?

It's the truth, I've done it. And you go, I got your hotel room. And they're like, what? And you're like, yeah, it's on me. And then they're just not staying with you. We've done it. Yeah, we got you like a really nice hotel. Why'd she go stay here?

You were like, that's really nice of you. And you're like, I'm a nice guy. No, you're not. You're just trying to, and by the way, you can use points for that too. You can use points. That's what, that might be the best use of points ever. It's like you have family come to town

and you go, I got your hotel. And they're like, what? Use your points. And can I, may I compliment my own Thanksgiving dinner? Yeah. I did a really good job this year. You did a great job. I got the honey bag town.

And I gotta tell you, I'm an outspoken, non-conformist to Thanksgiving food. Yeah. Like I really like, I really like what I did as far as getting steaks, getting lobster, getting things that are not traditional Thanksgiving. But every once in a while, you gotta give in and do traditional Thanksgiving.

Well, for the kids. They have to know what Thanksgiving, we can't be this anti-social, un-American. Anyways, I did it. And I think you did a really, really great job. Thank you. Thanks. I'm proud of myself.

Yeah. All right, let's open the show. We didn't do a show until yet. Are you ready? Let's party here. Let me make sure this is all the way up. Volume, get you a nice hot breakfast. Yeah.

Okay, here we go. So this talk's for my mom. Mom, remember that Chanel bag I really wanted that you wouldn't buy for me? I let an old man fuck me for it. Fuck you, bitch. This shit is big time. Who is Ryan?

Don't bring anyone loving to this. It's so funny. Your mom in the fucking stand. Well, well, well, well. That's so cool. That's awesome. Mom's house. With Tom Segura.

Tom's soup soup. And Christina Pajitse. Christina Pajitse. Welcome to your mom's house. Yeah, let's see this definition. Oh, I can't. I'm not supposed to talk. He's going to have a sneezing fit.

Before we started rolling, Tom sneezed. No exaggeration, the dog. What, 14 times? Yeah, it was quite a bit. It was the most I've ever seen in a row. And I think these are allergies. I don't think this is the Rona. But I learned very early in my relationship

with Tom that when he's about to sneeze and he's doing this whole thing, I can't acknowledge it. I'm not allowed to look at him. Which is exactly what you're doing. You're literally doing what you say. But I'm not looking as you were asking you about it. I'm telling the audience that I'm ignoring it right now.

I was looking into Dove. I was not talking to you. Wait a minute. That is sad up to you. Yeah, this is totally just a B conversation, an A-B conversation. And you're just kind of budding into it right now. So I'm not talking to you, though.

I was trying to vamp so that you could sneeze. No, no, no. I'm vamping. Like the thing that takes me out of it is. He's so demanding. You're acknowledging that you know what it is. You're like, hey, if there's one thing I've learned that if he's about to sneeze, I can't address it.

He's about to sneeze. It went away. You made the fucking sneeze go away. I can't even talk about it. I thought I thought you knew this. I thought I was allowed to talk about it with someone else. But I'm not allowed to talk about it. No, when did that ever come up?

When did that ever come up? Well, we've never had this issue before. I've always thought I'm allowed to talk about it. Bro, I thought you were fucking on board, that you know when a sneeze is coming. And you're like, you know if there's something I know? It's not to talk about the sneeze that he's about to sneeze.

I'm like, I'm about to sneeze. Wait, but can I tell you something? In my brain, I genuinely thought I found a loophole because I was like, I'm talking to the top about it. I'm not talking to you about it. I really thought, I was like, he's not going to get mad at me because I'm not talking to him. Talking to the top.

Retarded, retarded. Oh, God. God, totally ruined it. So, I did have an incredible sneezing fit before. One that I haven't had in probably like, at least a year. It was more than a dozen sneezes. You enjoy them though, that you like your body functions. You said it feels good.

Cannot believe you did that. Did you like them? No, I cannot believe you ruined the one that I was about to do. Okay, so next time when you're on the brink. Okay, tell me what to do. Should we sit here in silence until you have them? Is that what you want?

Just have a fucking conversation about something else. Okay, I didn't know I wasn't allowed to talk about the sneeze. Here's the thing, listen to me. I really thought I just wasn't allowed to address you during your, I thought I wasn't allowed to address you. I didn't know I wasn't allowed to talk about it with another party. So, look, I really didn't understand.

I don't know the rules. Next time when you're about to sneeze, I'm supposed to ignore you and say, Nadav, did you see the Tyson exhibition with Nate Johnson? Nate Johnson. The other day, that's my old boss at public safety. Yes, I did. You watched it?

It was quite a spectacle. It was cool. I didn't see the Nate Robinson fight, but I saw the Tyson and Jones. You didn't see that? I saw the very, like I started watching right when, right when they're like, holy shit, he got knocked out. Well, I will say this.

I actually really started to think about this. It might sound crazy to people. I started to think about YMH Live during the fight. Now, during the event, because of the fact that I realized, oh, this is something to do. Something like this is, I realized that it was, it was providing like as outrageously different as the two type of things are.

I go, oh, this is what this is. Like I was now the consumer going, you know what? It's like, it's something to do that's kind of exciting, kind of fun. Yeah, taking you out. I thought they did a great job of like putting on an event, like even if you weren't like into everything that they're doing or all the musical actually,

you know, to like to put that together, it was no small feat, you know? Like they had that all constructed at, I think at the Staples Center, they had stages for performances. They had rings for the fights and had the commentators. Izzy, Adesanya did a great job. Snoop did a great job talking.

That's Sugar Ray. I don't know who the main anchor guy was on that. I didn't recognize him, but regardless, I thought they did a good job of putting on a show, like making it something, you know, a spectacle to watch. We should mention that YMH Live 3, you guys were so good to us that there was no reason to take it down.

So if you're watching this right now and you still yet have not seen it, you can watch YMH Live 3 at YMHVirtual.com until Friday at midnight. Now, that being said, the fight before the Jake Paul, Nate Robinson fight, oh my God, that was the heavy segment. Yeah.

I missed that. What was I doing? You might have been with one of the kids. Yeah. So what happened was, you know Jake Paul, right? Logan Paul, Jake Paul, they're like internet sensations. They have these huge social media files. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

I don't even know what, I don't know, what they did to get famous. I just knew that they were famous at some point. They started off on Vine and then they parlayed, once Vine shut down, they parlayed that into YouTube. And now, yeah. So they were just Viners? Yeah.

So they're big YouTubers. I knew that they would do, that Logan would do vlogs and stuff, and then he eventually started a podcast and everything. I don't know much about him. I remember him always getting into some shit, like whatever, things would, he was a polarizing guy, you know, would get in shit.

I remember the dead body in the forest, remember, and that was like a huge shit. Oh, I remember that. That's how I know that guy's name, for sure. So that's this dude's brother. And then I think Logan, the older one, announced he was gonna fight someone first. I mean, I just thought it was publicity.

It's not, it kind of is, but they took it seriously, like the fighting. And you could tell if you've watched boxing at all, that, you know, Jake was ready to box. I mean, you could tell that he was, he was coming into the ring, like establishing a jab, like, you know, just kind of like doing what you do in boxing and Nate Robinson is a former NBA player.

So I didn't even realize that Nate called him out and was like, I'll whoop your ass or something like that. And so that's what, that's what set this up. But when, man, the nerves of a fight take over. So he was like charging at Jake, like charging at him. Like I thought he was gonna tackle him multiple times. And he wasn't boxing, he was not boxing. He was running at him and it was inexperience.

It was, you know, never having been in that position, never having really boxed other than trained. And you could see that like, Jake was definitely the more trained boxer. And then he knocked him, by the way, I mean, not to shit on the whole thing, but that ref should have called it after the second time he went down.

The second time he went down, he gave him an extended count by my count. I was like, oh, that's 10. That's 11, 12. And he was like, yeah, all right. And then he told me to like show me your gloves. Like, and he had to explain it to him. And you could hear the mic.

He was like, you need to put your gloves up here if you're gonna go back. And then he was like, yeah, yeah. And you're like, oh, he's, you should wave this off. Like this is not gonna go well. And then he fucking knocked him out for like a good minute. Like he was blacked out, completely knocked out. Not when you see like a knockout and the guy gets up.

That dude was asleep, face down. And that kind of shit has lasting damage. You know, I mean, it can have, it can. That can fuck you up for, that can change things in your brain for sure, for sure. But anyway, then we watched Tyson Jones. You did watch that one with him. Well, I'm a huge fan of Mike Tyson for obvious reasons.

One being that he's a huge fan of you and your joke about him. But I mean, he's an amazing fighter too. Yeah, it's like nostalgic too, you know? It's the best. That's what we grew up with. Oh yeah. Like our dads ordering his fights

and then being like, fuck, it's over. It's over. And him, and now the ear biting, was that Tyson? Yeah. I remember that. That was a good one too. I mean, so many great fights, but what I loved. It's a great one to bring up.

That's just what I remember. But Tyson is such a beast and his the physicality of this man. He's 53 or 54. He looks amazing. Jones did not look as good. He did show some sparks of his old self where he would do the, he had this very signature thing

where he would box with his front, like his lead hand down and basically almost taunt you with his face, which is a very dangerous thing to do unless you're super skilled. And he did that a few times. And it was entertaining. He definitely wasn't in the same physical shape

and a couple of times, but I do think that Tyson actually did the thing that no one thought he would do, which is show some restraint. There was a couple of times where I was like, oh, right here at the end, he'll kill him. Like the 10 second. Yes, I was waiting for it.

And it was at the end of the fight. And you could tell that he was like, oh no, like this went in the distance, we're good. And I was like, oh, he's being like cool about it. He's being respectful. And what's interesting is Tyson afterwards, they said, well, how do you feel you did? And he goes, I gave them a good show.

He kept saying that I gave the audience a good show. And just apropos of what you were saying earlier, like that's really what that was. It was, and he was always cognizant of that. When I, I'll never forget, like I've talked to him a few times now, but the first time that I talked to him at length was when he came to my show in the green room

and we talked about putting on a good show. So Mike Tyson and I were talking about, I was talking about boxing. And I was asking him his opinion on this fighter, that fighter, all these, you know, and he was super down and very honest. And he talked to me about how certain fighters who will remain unnamed don't put on great shows

and how he's like, they're boring. And he doesn't really, he goes, but I was always a showman. Like I know people want to see a knockout. So I'm trying, that's what, like, part of the reason I'm trying to knock people out is yes to win the fight and have it be over. But part of the reason is because I know

that all these people are here to see that. Yeah. So he's like trying to put on a show, you know? Jones did say afterwards that he was like, those body shots hurt like fucking shit. Yes. Well, could you imagine? Oh my gosh, getting hit by Tyson's gotta be horrible.

And Jones is notably, I mean, they're close in height, but like in weight and in build, they're not. You know, George Hill Jr. was not a heavyweight. Mike Tyson was a heavyweight. Wow. So when you're fighting a different weight class, it's really different, the power that can be delivered. Do you imagine, oh, that's right.

They said Tyson lost 100 pounds for the fight. 100 pounds? Yeah. I heard that too when I was like, that can't be. I don't think that's accurate. He kept on saying that he was getting in shape for the last year or two and lost 100 pounds. Damn.

I mean, Tyson won. The more I did see him last, he was like, notably overweight. But he looked amazing. The guys, he looked like he was what, 35 years old. Yeah. I mean, my goodness. And he was also super hyped up after the fight,

which was actually scary. He's like, we're gonna do this shit all the time. Yeah, I was rad. And he's like, fuck humanity. And I was like, oh, I don't even know what this means. So he was real juiced. What I really enjoyed was the age factor. It was exciting to see older men doing this.

And in fact, I would encourage older boxing. I would like to see 60, 70 year old's box. I think it's way more precarious because the whole time you're like, oh, he's gonna get really fucked up, you know? You want to see? I would love the seniors fight. I would love elderly boxing.

And I think we should start to do it. Look, look, there's female boxers now. There's female MMA. Let's do geriatric fighting. I think that's really the next move. Yeah. Okay. We can get Larry King and Ed Astner.

Oh, that's a great, wouldn't you love that? I don't know that that would be a good show. I mean, it could be if like you want to just see somebody, you know, die. Just break, that's what I want to see. Oh my God. Remember where I sent you? You guys over the weekend?

Yeah, how could I forget? Dude, what did I send you? So, both of you guys sent a whole bunch of links to us over the weekend. And Tom, Tom sent the link to me and Zolo. And I was like, oh, okay, let's see what this is. And it was someone getting sucked into a machine, getting all of the skin ripped off of their body

and seeing big clouds of blood mist, like all in security cam footage. And I'm looking at it and like, what the fuck do you want us to do with this? Cause I don't even think we could really show this on a live. Right. But what did I send you? No, no, he's not done yet.

Oh, sorry. And I mean, it just, it's like a de-gloving. I've heard Drew talk about de-glovings before. And I thought that only meant like the skin on your arm getting de-gloved. But I've never realized that an entire body could get de-gloved. And then the photos afterwards.

Yeah, just a pile of skin next to the machine. Is this the video that you guys, can I see it? Yeah, sure. Let me see if I can take it out. The only reason I, Tom, the only reason I bring up what I sent them is just because you and I have different ideas of what's funny and festive.

Yeah, no, I understand that. I'm just saying that he wasn't just, you know, done talking about the video. Yeah, oh, I know. It was pretty cool. And then he, so he goes, where are we supposed to do it? I was like, no, I was just sharing it with you. Yeah, cause I mean, you just sent the link.

You just sent the link and the tweet and it's like, oh, OK, well, I imagine, you know, well, we'll figure out what show to filter this into. I was like, no, no, no, no, it's not for a show. It's just to show you. Oh my god, even just seeing it, oh god, OK. Yeah. So this says, this is exactly what you sent them.

This is, I sent them this. On Thanksgiving. So can you make that big? Can you describe it for the audience? Yeah, so there's a guy right there and he's like walking up to a piece of machinery. And then he reaches over and I think his, yeah, right there. Like it catches what he's wearing and it's spinning.

I got a really high rate of speed and he doesn't. And then all of a sudden, it just starts spinning him around. I don't know how. And then like clothes and everything's coming off of him. And then eventually, though, like his whole body. Whoa. Yeah, it's pretty wild. But here's the thing I found out.

He's OK. No, he's not. He's a pile of skin and meat. He's fine. I found out. I found out he's fine. Like how do you, I don't even understand how you're smiling. Like I don't.

There's so many, every time I think I get what makes you laugh with these, it's the game changes almost immediately when I have that thought. Like, I think just last week, you're like, look, I want to get more into the violence like I don't want to see people die. I'll tell you something about this video that is like,

it is comical to watch the body fling around like that. I got to take this off. I can't watch this on camera. Like it's funny to watch that part. Yeah. Like to fling it around. You know, like it feels like a cartoon. The rag doll?

The rag doll. You like seeing that? But then like, it's also, here's the thing, it's wide security cam footage. It's not like detailed footage, you know? Yeah. I disagree. You do?

Yeah. I've never seen a video where I saw a cloud of blood mist in the video. And it's, you see multiple, you see that multiple times in this one. I think what ruins it for me because I think Tom's right. It looks like a cartoon in the beginning. So I'm not really like, oh, this is fake.

But then to see the other workers walk by and go like, oh my God. And then to see them like collapse in horror, then you're like, oh, this is real. It's really happening. And I don't like that. Yeah, Tom, let me ask you. Yeah, I'm not sure either what's happening.

When you watch these videos, like in this point, when's the moment you decided to send this to me? To ruin your day. Well, I think you sent this on Thanksgiving. Yeah. So what happened was, I saw that and I go like, what the fuck? And then the guy who sent it to me goes, this is for the way I make life.

No, no, no. No, it's not. Not to show. This is for making me watch why it makes life. Oh, OK. Like he was like, this is payback. Yeah, I don't think we could show this. So we could show it.

We could definitely show it. I don't think so. I don't think it's funny. Do you know what I'm saying? No, but he's saying we could. You know what? That might be the closer on the next one. It starts getting into snuff.

It's dark. Well, I think there's there's laws about it. No, no, his his follow up was the images in high definition photos of the aftermath there. That was wild, because that had the guy's hand still holding on to the equipment. Yeah, kind of. So anyway, Nadav, you got the Tyson fight.

Yeah, I just saw all sorts of mayhem. I saw Mike Tyson, you know, still deliver it and still be just as terrifying in the ring. Yeah. And then I got an email that shows Tom could be just as terrifying as ever. Oh, but what did I send you guys for Thanksgiving? A whole bunch of really fun talks.

Right. But I mean, specifically a text a text ring I sent you guys. I think it was a special news for all singing. Right. Oh, my God. But that's the difference between you and me, Tom. That you're you're about the mentally deficient. I like I like that kind of stuff that makes me laugh. And then you like gory stuff.

Do we have like 10 to 12 Benadryl? Something I need to take it. I'm serious. Do we have any Benadryl? I don't think we have any. What do you allergic to? I don't know, but it's it's really intense right now. Oh, I see that your eyes are all watery.

Is it my perfume, maybe? I don't think so. Do you wear it often? Yeah. You know, I will say that it didn't really start until I walked in and set across from Nadav. Oh, so you're allergic to Jays now. No, what is it?

What is it? Take it there. I just meant you specifically. OK, allergic to fans of drum line. Sorry, Tom. I approve juice. Go ahead, Tom. I'd like to make a formal announcement.

Go ahead on the show. I have a huge announcement. If you would cue the YMH soundboard, please. God. This is what I live with, by the way. This is a YMH exclusive. These sounds? Yeah, but let's let's backtrack here.

All the morning was the same. Everything was the same. We get here, we sit and we talk to Nadav. All of a sudden, I have an allergic reaction. I know. Can what you eat make you do this? No, I don't think so. It's like, maybe it's dusty.

Did you guys do water? I do have a severe dust allergy. Yeah, maybe it's dust, mites. Not any more dusty than normal. Asbestos, mesothelioma. That is even, they just have commercials for it. Anyways, I have a huge announcement. After 15 years together with this man next to me,

my dear husband, baby daddy, Paramoa, I have never had a conversation with him while he's in the shitter taking a dump. I have many times tried to talk to him through the door to get vital pieces of information or anything like that. And you never break. You always pretend like you can't hear me calling your name or I'll be like, Tom, knock, knock, knock, Tom.

What time does the kids, dah, dah, dah, dah, dah? And that's what I hear through the door. Yep. And you pretend like the conversation isn't happening. So today, for the first time. That one. Yeah. For the first time in 15 years,

Tom yelled at me through the door as he was making a brown about our trip being canceled and he announced it. Hey, hey, guess what? The hotel gave us our money back or whatever. And I was like, this is it. This is the first time in 15 years that he's talked through the door.

She wasn't excited about the refund. She was excited about that I was talking to her with the toilet with the door close. Well, I feel as though we've finally gotten that intimacy in the relationship that I so desperately crave with you. Is it so much to ask to have a conversation while you're taking a dump? I really like my peace and quiet in there.

I like it. I like to be able to just, you know, you know what I mean? Just relax. I do know what you mean. We should stop down. I gotta get something. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I can't continue. Pop on while we're doing. That's so weird. How many benadryl did you take? I just took one right now. Oh, well, that's not gonna be enough. You know that. We didn't even revisit the opening clip

and how amazing that was. I know. Yeah. So the stick talks to my mom. Mom, remember that Chanel bag I really wanted that you wouldn't buy for me? I let an old man fuck me for it. Fuck you, bitch.

How happy are you? We have sons. No. Do you think it was that old man in that movie we watched last week? Which old man was that? That banged her. You know the one that you made me watch his face.

Oh. Is that why I made you live? That's not a movie we watched last week. I'm taking it like iTunes. I'm like, what movie did we watch last week? Do you mean an adult film? An adult feature film. That's the kind of guy, by the way.

And if you're, we always try to encourage smart, business savvy women to get yours. And we've endorsed it before on the show, panties, socks, whatever, but I really gotta say, if you're in a position to have an old, sloppy, stinky old man bang you and you get something in exchange. It's worth it. I think it's a great idea.

Well, and she chose a timeless Chanel bag. Beautiful. That's a gorgeous bag. She's gonna be using that for the rest of her life. And by the way, this chick's what, 19 or something. Okay, that bag's probably a couple grand. To get, to take one from an old man, it probably didn't last long.

No. He didn't hurt her. It's not like he's splittering half. He probably was like, ugh. And then here's a $2,000 bag. How is that a bad deal? It's totally worth it, I agree, Tom. And also, but do you think the Viagra,

if he took Viagra, that makes it last longer? It does, but here's the thing, he hasn't been in a 19-year-old piece of ass in fucking 50 years. So it's like, he probably went in there and was like, this is, and then, yeah, it's done. And guys like that, we had the cockroach here who begot six times in 12 hours.

If it's truly an old man, like she's saying, dude, it's one and done. One and done. I have busts and that every three weeks, you know? So I would say, salute to you. I wish I could read, can you read what her handle is? Real, real, real, real. Can you see it?

Real Val Louise. I just can't read it. Well, good for you. Real Ava Louise. There you go. Ava Louise, good for you, girl. Yeah. Well, and also. Real Ava Louise, you're right.

Good for you. It is an F you to mom. It is, you know, fuck you, mom. Yeah. Why don't you, but you should buy your kids a thousand dollar bag. You don't want me to fuck old guys? Then buy me cool shit.

That's what the message is. That is the threat is like, either you buy this for me or I'm gonna. And by the way, that, I mean, this, this may have worked. She may, she may go to her mom after mom sees this talk and she goes, I got, I want to get these Gucci boots. And mom's like, no. And then she goes, you mean to suck off?

How? How? Our old landlord? That lives down the street. He's on dialysis. You mean to give him a blow job? And then she's like, all right, all right, all right. What size are you again?

And then she buys her the boot. I mean, it's, it's good negotiation. It is. It is a good extortion tool for kids. It's a good lesson. That's the end of the day. This clip is a great, great lesson. Okay.

Is there anything, hold on. Would you, would you have sex with an older woman for any material item? What would you, for a Rolex? I think you would. No. Oh, you mean like. Submariner, that's something you like.

Yeah. That's a very popular one. I mean, you're talking about when I was in her position. I'm 19. Are you talking about? Yeah. Let's say you've, you're not an adult. You have no money.

Oh yeah. Yeah. No, no. You're, you're. Yes. Yes. Dame Judy Dutch. You could have gotten me to do all kinds of foul shit

when I was 19 or 20 and been like, here's a few thousand dollars. I'll be like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no, no, no. I didn't offer you a few thousand dollars. No, but I'm saying a few thousand dollar item. Right. I offered you the stuff in which then you'd have to

hawk. There you go. There's Dame Judy, Judy Dent. She got to do her. Yes. Yeah. If I'm 19 or 20 and you're like, do you want this cool sub or do you want, you know, whatever, like a nice jacket

or something that I can't afford? And you're like, you just have to fuck this old lady. I'd be like, yeah, of course I'll do it. I gotta tell you. And also like, you know, you fucking trip when you're 19 and your dick gets hard. So it's like, it's not like it's a, it's not like a big thing to work this out.

I'm going to share a story with you that I've never shared with you. Oh my God. Okay. Oh God. Now I'm embarrassed even. I'm so excited. The details.

Okay. How do I tell this without? So one time there was an older man who was interested in me and I mean in his mid 40, like how old I am now 44, let's say mid 40s. Yeah. And I was 20, 22 years old. Smoke show.

Smoke show. Height of my youth couldn't be any skinnier. Tits couldn't be any more perfect. I mean, I was cute, right? 22 year old Christina. Yeah. Look, look, come on. Those are the world rules days.

Cool hair. So I've never gone out with an older man in my life. Like I'm not interested. I'm not, I'm not, that was okay. That was on the challenge. Wasn't looking at you. Jesus Christ. I mean, it hasn't stopped.

I've took the medicine. Somewhere I'm older there. I'm 28 there, but yeah, around that time. Okay. So any whoodles. For some reason I'm intrigued. He's not American. So maybe I've got this thing with him

cause he's European. I'm like, all right, I'm gonna try this. Maybe I'm gonna be the girl that goes out with older guys. Yeah. Okay. So we go for a walk. This is in a foreign country. I'm in a foreign country at the time.

And I have no money. I have no, I'm so poor. By the way, you said foreign country, like, you know that I lived in many foreign countries. No, no, I don't want to say, I don't want to give a, I'm trying to give details without giving too many. You know what I'm saying? So any whoodles.

We're in another country, we're walking around. And I think the reason I'm saying that is because it lends itself to like doing things that normally aren't in your. I got you. You know, you're like, what's the big deal? This is not me. I'm so-and-so, I'm in a different place.

So we go up, we're walking through the city and like, he's buying me stuff. You know, like I see a silly hat with cat ears. I'm broke. And he's like, I'll get that for you. And I'm like, cool, like the first item's cool. And then it's like, oh, I want, you know, this other silly thing.

And oh, yeah, sure, here you go. And I, I didn't like him. Like as, as the date wore on, I was kind of like, you know, I don't think this is really me. I'm trying this on, this isn't me. And like, I remember the gross feeling when he walked me back to my hotel of like, ooh, but you bought me this stuff.

Right, what's the exchange now? Yeah, and I- It's not gonna get hard till I'm ready to come. Yeah. Yeah. Right? Yeah, and I remember I wanted to give those items back to him immediately and just be like,

dude, I'm not like, we're not, I can't. And I, nothing happened with this gentleman. Nothing like that happened? No, nothing, nothing. I swear to God, I swear in our children's eyes, nothing happened. All right. I was not interested in him.

But just, just that gross feeling of like, being a little girl and having daddy buy you stuff felt so- Some people really like that. Gross to me, that, that, the power dynamic is so vast, vastly off. Did he buy something, anything of like, substantial value?

No, I would never do that. I would never do it. It was just like little trinkets and stuff. Like bullshit in the streets. Yeah. But like, you know, $20 or $30. But when you walk back, was he like, what's up? He, I think he was expecting, yes,

some kind of exchange for the night, you know? And I was like, hmm, I can't, good night, good bye. And I wanted to run upstairs immediately and just be like, ugh, like you're so old and not- You got that beautiful mouth. Because at the time, like when you're a young and an old dude, and that's not old, like, you know, mid, no, we're in our 40s,

but to a 20 year old girl, it's revolting. Yeah, I think what's interesting is like, there's a way that this works. And like, what you were doing was like, you were saying like, can I- Is this me? Yeah, I'm trying this on. Which makes sense.

What this girl did, no, no, which I respect though. What she did was she was like, she had like an item. A goal. She was like, I want this thing. Yes. And so she went to a guy and was like, will you get me this? And then she probably just implied,

like, and I'll make it worth it to you. And then the guy weighed and he was like, yeah, okay. I'll do that. Yeah, it's worth two grand. Sure. So what you're saying is she's setting goals. She's going after them. She's a go-getter.

I believe that this girl went to whatever man she approached and was like, I want this bag. Yeah. You know, can I get, will you get this bag for me? Yeah. And then, yeah, you know. She's a cool girl. She's part of the cool girl club.

Oh, she's a hundred percent cool. She's the coolest. Yeah. And then this old guy, I wonder what oldest to her, it could be, she was like, yeah, he was like 38. Yeah. Oh, wow, that is pretty old. Because remember when you were 20 or 19?

It was, it sounded, yes. A four year old is just the grossest thing in the world. My, when our five year, almost five year old calls me old man, I laugh so hard. He does it after I torture him. Like I'll grab him and like pin him down and like start like, you know, tickling his neck as he'll be like screaming, let me go, let me go.

And I'll find that I'm good. He goes, old man. It's such a psycho. It's such a crazy aggressive thing to say. I like when he, he calls you old Maurice. Yeah, old Maurice. That's my favorite. Yeah.

Such an old Maurice. All right, dude. He's so. Hey, big news in the YMH community as well. You're colonoscopy. Yes. You haven't even gotten into the aftermath. I know.

I was so bummed that post procedure, first of all, I didn't realize that I could easily become an addict to anesthesia. Like I really, really dig it. I'm looking forward to my next procedure. You're going to sign up for one every year. Cause I remembered how good the hernia juice was where it was like, see you later.

Wait, he didn't seem nervous at all. No, this time I was like, let me go. And I got in there and they're like, okay. And by the way, the guy looks at my, the anesthesiologist looks at the monitor and he goes, your heart rate's 40. And I go, yeah, it's always like that. And then the GI goes, oh, you didn't know?

You're looking at an athletic specimen here. And I was like. Oh my God. Okay, man. So yeah. Rude. Yeah. Like I go, do I get this from every fucking doctor?

So then I'm on my side and I was like, hey, you know, I usually, I usually sleep with a mouth guard. I just let them, you let anesthesiologists cause they're going to put you down. And I go, so, you know, I don't know about the airway. And he's like, oh, good call. They're like, bite onto this. So I bite onto a thing.

No, no hesitation. I'm like, well, and they strap it on. So it keeps your, your airway open. And I go. It's good to tell them. So this is like 30 seconds and counting. And I go, and they go, so I go, just send me bye-bye. Okay.

That's what I looked up and I told the guy and then he goes, what? I go, bye-bye. And I put my head down and then they're like, do you feel it? And my eyes were fluttered. I go, does it look like I feel it? And then that was it.

Then they were just like, hey. And I was like, it's over. And they're like, yeah, everything was good. I'm supposed to get an update today on biopsies. So maybe, you know, but he's like, everything looked good. He's like, you got a nice asshole, feels soft and everything. But the worst part was because of COVID, you know, so many more restrictions, I come out of it.

And this is what I was looking forward to the most were the farts, right? Farts, I heard that you get these awesome farts right when you're done. So I'm laying there and they're like, the lady's like, if you need to pass gas, I was like here. And she's like, honey, we hear it all the time. Don't worry.

It was kind of a group set. I mean, you have like privacy. She was like, just yeah, just you're fine. And I go, OK. And I wished I had my, even my phone with me, it was just like that, you know, like real cool farts. And it was a sequence of them. Just as soon as you thought you're done,

you're like, oh, is there something else in the chamber? And you know, I was just farting. For a while. But then by the time I got in the car with you to head back, the farts were basically done. No farts. And I was so upset because because of COVID, I wasn't allowed to go up with you.

And I was so looking forward to hearing those. They're pretty cool. Now, let me ask you one question. You said that you were in a recovery area with different patients. Had all of those people had colonoscopies as well? That is a good question. I'm not entirely sure.

I'm not entirely sure. But I think the majority, yes, because it was a specialized unit for GI stuff. Because I could imagine the embarrassment or the thrill of being in that curtain next to someone who just had a colonoscopy and how funny it would be to be laying there. And here's somebody have colonoscopy farts. I think that would be something I pay money to experience,

because that would be pretty funny. I don't know about paying money, but it was pretty cool. I got to hear a few of your post colonoscopy farts. I've never had anything like this. I know you're so it's not sickness. It's not. It's not the road. I'm not sick.

I'm just like, I know what my allergies feel like. I could feel it also in my eyes, you know? My eyes feel irritated and. Might it be where we are located the wind? Because it was very windy over the weekend. Maybe the wind pushes the dust into your face. I don't want to be like insensitive, but I still think it's an adab.

Yeah. Yeah. OK, so now I'm not feeling it. Well, you browned a lot, but also let's catch the audience up on how your browns were. You took the the May locks or whatever the fuck it may locks. I don't know what they get. Now, they send you prescription solution

that's like delivered to the house. And they're like, this is going to like be near a toilet. But the crazy thing is they go, you started at 4 p.m. And then they go and you drink the exact same thing at 7 p.m. So like as your body is, you feel like, oh, it's evacuating everything. They're like, here's sending a second round, the backup team. It was pretty intense.

It was pretty intense. So it was a lot of water. That's the thing. It sounded like somebody poured a gallon of water into the toilet every time. Is it brown water or clear water? It's very brown. Very brown.

And did they get a little more clear as it goes along? Did they find any items in your colon? For instance, they look and they go, oh, there's a lot of seeds in here. You've been eating a lot of oranges or watermelons. I asked them. I go, I was a little nervous because even like an hour before I went in, at the place, I sat down on the toilet

and water still was coming out of me. This is like right before. And I was like, oh, man, I followed the instructions to a tea. I fasted completely the day before. Thank God I read the details on what I was allowed to drink because I bought juices and gatorade because he's like, you're going to have juice and gatorade and water the day before.

I was like, OK, and I bought a bunch. And then on the instructions, right before I was about to start drinking gatorade, it's like only drink lime gatorade. What? Because if you drink red or purple, it could read as blood to us during the colonoscopy. Oh, that would be bad. And they're like, then they'll be like, you're bleeding in your bowels.

So right. I was like, oh, man, I actually bought a few different. I was like, thank God I read this right. Anyways, I started just I mean, I was going through because I was losing so much fluid. But right before, so I told the nurse, I was like, the thing is, I just went downstairs and I still had stuff coming out. But I was telling her that I didn't cheat.

Like I followed the instructions. She gets OK. I go, I think there will still be stuff, though. And she goes, oh, he uses like a suction tube and he'll suck up all the fluid. That happens totally fine. I was like, you're going to just suck up all the fluid in my asshole? And she was like, yeah, there'll be nothing there.

That is crazy. And when you were done, did you feel lighter? Did you feel different? Here's the thing. I went an extra long period without eating or drinking because normally, initially, I was going to have whatever. Initially, you do the fast and you try to go first thing in the morning, but there wasn't availability.

So I ended up going, how long did I go? I went 36 hours for a fast, which is pretty. You know, if you're not used to it, you go like, Jesus, even though I did. I think I told you, I felt like I felt like mental clarity and I felt thankful that I don't have to fast all the time, you know, which I think is good. Yeah, I did, too. I remember you saying that. You're like, I'm just so thankful that I can eat whenever I.

Yeah, yeah. I actually thought about that, that like I don't have to fast. Except for this procedure. But anyways, thank God I'm not Muslim Ramadan. They do that for like a long time. Hours, they fast from sun up till sundown. You get to eat that meal if tar when you break your fast at night. It's terrible.

It's very hot, too. I'm serious. That's terrible. I always felt when I was in the Middle East during Ramadan, I felt really bad for them because no liquid and it's the desert and it's summer. It's like 120 degrees. That's good. Well, Bert, the thing is, is that there's different cultures and they do

things differently around the world. I know, but it's terrible. OK, hard. I couldn't do it. Check this out. You're going to spit on the floor. You need some help? Yeah, I just told you, I mean, I'm not going to get you enough pepper.

OK, well, then don't ask if I if you can help me, if you're not going to help me. I mean, that's you're not going to be genuine. Then don't don't talk to me at all. I don't do sling work. Sorry, I'm not going to go with you to Dr. Pepper. OK, we're a public servant. I thought it might be reasonable to have. I mean, you you're the one who asked me if you could help me though.

Yeah, I did. OK, if you don't want to help me, then don't ask. That's fine. If you're listening, this is a man telling a police officer, an officer of the law. Can you go get me a Dr. Pepper? And because he's like, well, that's what I understood when you said, can I help you? Well, there's something I can do for you as a police officer, not as a. Yeah, there are gas stations on the road.

Here, I'll give you. I'll give you a little extra. You can get yourself a drink, too. Really? Yeah, yeah, grab yourself a drink, too. You like you like Dr. Pepper? Yeah, but I don't need them up to fans of the years. Look at me. OK, no, don't be trying to give me money on that.

I'm not going to go pick you up a Dr. Pepper. OK, I mean, this guy is such an asshole, the guy asking because I feel like that cop is actually extra nice. I mean, he made it. You could get. So you get the wrong cop and ask that to and have your fucking day. Maybe you're life ruined, like maybe life over. But yeah, there is a point also where he definitely considers he was like, for real, he's he looked down.

He was like, yeah, he was like, and then he goes, no, I'm too fat already. Like he he'd reason through, which is great. But he also was like, you're going to buy me something. That's cool. That is kind of thought about that. It was almost like the girl getting fucked by the old guy for a purse. It kind of all comes together. Well, Tom, everybody likes the free stuff. Yeah, everybody likes free.

Could you imagine though being a cop and you're just like trying to do the right thing? He was trying to be nice and help you something. He's like, yeah, go pick me up or something to drink. And then this jackass. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know how they deal with this stuff, man. You see this shit. Oh, I mean, the human numb chuck.

How is that happening? I don't know. Where'd you find that? Cool. Instagram, it was sent in and like, yeah, I can't tell if this guy is just double jointed or or never had his arm set after he broke it severely. There's a hole, you know, it could go either way with it. Doesn't seem to cause him pain. So he's been like this for a while.

See, this bothers me more than they got to get sucked into the machine. What part about this? It's just they both have spinning stuff. And you're like, I prefer the spinning stuff if someone dies. No, I don't prefer that someone dies. I'm just saying this is harder to watch. Why? Because the other one's funnier. The other one's death. How is it funnier?

Because it's like comical. It look like a cartoon like like, you know, it's not. Yeah, but the other person died and that's not funny everywhere. That's not so what part is funny? Because the whole video is the guy dying. The visual of it is so like exaggerated. It's so over the top. It's so far removed from something you normally see.

It actually looks like a cartoon. And this one doesn't look like a cartoon. Well, here's the thing that you have the security cam footage is not as clear. There's a little more distance. It's not high def. This is like, see, I don't I like being kind of removed from whatever something bad things happening. It's like there needs to be a lack of clarity to be able to enjoy it.

Yeah, enjoy it. He says, yeah, enjoy. I think I think I'm being reasonable. I think you guys are both being jerks. OK. OK. I think you're being real. You're on your Benadryl right now. I'm not going to argue with you. You're getting all hopped up for your sexual plumber before you take your

partner, your master bait. You want to get extra horny. Yeah, I think you guys are both being unreasonable. I feel like doing this right now. There I am behind. Oh, oh, oh, did you see his arrogance? He's like, yep, there you go. I felt good.

So like where where is this? I think it's somewhere in Latin America. That is not how to do that. Just right, because now you know how to do it. I could definitely be better. So where did he go wrong? I think is the part where he almost snapped her fucking spine. Let me see it again.

Holy shit. Yeah, you definitely don't adjust like that. I got you. Yeah, that's not how you do it. That's not. He did the old I'm going to hurt you in a new way. So you forgot how your old pain feels. That's that's an old trick we learn in chiropractic school.

The spine isn't supposed to go like that. That definitely hurt her. I mean, he may not have heard her permanently, but he heard her. Wait, I love how he thinks he did a good job, though. He's like, got you. Give her a little pat on the back. That's how it is. Just working my magic.

Sometimes you know that needle you're going to needle you get a shot and you're like, it hurts for a second, but all the good stuff comes after. So that dude's real. Wow. The dove, we're going to send you to this guy next. No, no, that would be hilarious. You better choose me over this guy. Look, I choose you more over this.

I mean, you're not. I mean, that was a weird pop. I've never heard a pop like that when I've been adjusted. Yeah, that's yeah, that's I think he had a disc slip in her back that he just did. But well, I mean, the fact that you know that that's not how it's supposed to go, I already feel more comfortable. See, so what's the order between me adjusting you, this guy adjusting you? Is that my normal?

No, you're going into the machine that spins the guy around throw them. That guy didn't which do I prefer? Which which order would you put it in? OK, death is last. Death is last. And then I think this guy is second to last and your third from last. I'm first. That's the one way to put it.

Third from last, I'm your primary adjuster. This is horrible. Can chiropractors chime in on this, please? Yeah, if you work in a chiropractic office, please let us know about this man's technique. I mean, this could not be good. Well, I've never been to a chiropractor that pulls your neck up and back. No, he almost fucking broke her back.

Yeah, that's really great. She's actually lucky that I think that he's not. Like very strong. Oh, my God, if you've done that with great force, forget it. I just can't believe how pleased he is with himself. Right. This is how it's done. This is the this is the gig I signed up for. We saw this video that is very funny of somebody commenting on Giuliani

during a press conference. I guess he had he's in the wings. He's done talking and one of the other lawyers is talking. And this is a play by play. That's pretty funny. Yo, watch my man's over here. Yo, takes out the handkerchief, blows his nose, takes it boogers side in, smears his hands all over it, wipes it into his lips, all over his face.

So he's wiping snot all over his face, smearing his hand into it. All wrong. Looks like shit, bro. He did it all wrong. I know he did the side that he blew into. He kept out instead of folding it over. And then he did wipe his mouth and his whole face with it. OK, well, let's OK. Let's think this through.

Maybe there was no snot in it. Like maybe he just did a white. Oh, I got you. No boogies. What is up with Giuliani lately? And then the hair dye meme that was passed around. I was real crazy. That was wild.

He's just not on his game. Real, real crazy. Yeah, goodness gracious. He is out of it, I think. It's the age, maybe. Oh, yeah, by the way, about the colonoscopy. We call my dad on the way home and I go. He goes, how'd it go?

I said, it's great. And he goes, yeah, you know, anything to tell you anything? So no, not yet. Everything looks all right. So they might they told me that. I won't have my first bowel movement probably for a couple of days. He goes, nah, that's not true.

I go, well, these people do these all day. And he goes, Tommy. I bet you're going to go tomorrow. And I go, he goes, maybe sooner. I go, dad, they just told me this. And he goes, look, if there's one thing I know about, it's taking a shit. He did say that.

I go, I believe you. And then he he was right. He was right. Yeah. Yeah. And I'll tell you another thing that I didn't tell you this. You know how to shit. Then I feel like like everything was I felt like back. But you ever have a day where you feel like.

You're shitting just so much, not messy, Browns normal. I had a day like that. I think it was yesterday or the day before where it was just volume, but healthy. Yeah, it happens. It happens to me when I when I like fast a little bit. That's why I did a meal. I skipped and then I went back to normal

and then it was just fucking on. Yeah, but it's pleasurable, right? Because you're like, oh, my God, there's so much there. So wait a minute. You need to tell me that you ate enough to replenish what was in your intestines in like 24 hours, basically. You created enough.

Well, here's the truth. It wasn't now what the when I went early, it wasn't a normal. It was just like slop. But it was like somebody turning the machine back on. You know what I mean? Well, yeah, yeah. I can't wait to hear the results of this whole thing.

Oh, my God. We we we were speaking of dad stuff. We were watching The Hunt for Red October. Yes. And we realized that is totally true. And that is dad's jackoff. To The Hunt for Red October and all Tom Clancy books and movies. What is it about a dad?

I don't know. Talk to your dad and be like, hey, Dad, did you watch The Hunt for Red October and watch how your dad goes? Oh, yeah. And then be like, did you jack off to it? And he'll be like, what? And then later on, he'll probably be like, yeah, I did.

I did. Well, and I would argue that just like any Cold War stuff. Yes. World War two. Can I tell you my theory on this? They love this war. My theory. What? It's it's two twofold. OK, one is that they grew up in an era

where this was the dominant environmental reality, like the the world you lived in was dominated by this the adversarial relationship with, you know, the other country and other country. So and also war, like anyone who's a boomer, like you have if your dad's like between 60 and 80, like in that in that age gap, he either was born at the end of or towards the end of World War two or just after that or during the Korean War, like born.

So like you're in like these major major wars. Then was definitely alive, present or involved in the Vietnam War. Yes. Which was like the last of like the, you know, even though we've had Desert Storm and Afghanistan and stuff, the Vietnam War is different, like in the way that it was. We in the way that we were engaged in it and the way that it affected the world, right?

So they it's also just like part of their DNA. Right. And those young men were drafted to you forget that some. Yeah, you you had a neighbor who would get sent off to war, whereas we somewhere drafted some dad sign up like my dad. They were like, I'll go. So that's and late in life. No, Denise, didn't it was a bit older? No. OK, I thought he was like 20.

No, he just that's like what guys like that did, though, like his brother, too. And they were just like, oh, yeah, I'll go wild. Yeah. So so there's that, right? Like there's that it's part of the environment. And then it's that these types of movies. Essentially, they're intellectual action movies. See, men love we love action movies.

There's there's remove your brain from thinking action. That's like die hard Rambo. Tots, you know, so you're just like just. Yeah, exactly. Seagull, Van Damme, most shorts. It's all just like explosion, explosion, fight, fight, shoot, shoot. But the the story is real basic. It's always like, you know, Wife's in trouble. My kid, my kids in protection.

You must protect your family. If you get into a geopolitical storyline with espionage and, you know, the chess moves and deception. It it's an intellectually stimulating, but it still has the payoff of the action because that that movie still has like shooting torpedoes, explosions, but it's under this storyline of defection and the, you know, the the Soviets and the US. And it gives you this sense that you're acting.

You feel more sophisticated watching the movie. Yes, like you're basically get to feel like, oh, I'm I'm watching a smart. You're smart. It's like your sex in the city. It's what women. We like the storylines between big and Aiden. And what is she wearing and the shoes? And then you guys are like, let's fucking blow up these Russians in the submarine, but also the hunt for red October.

Listen here, Rusky. Yeah, we believe in freedom. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's that that that good stuff of America. We're fighting for democracy. We're fighting the Reds. Yeah. That's true. And shoot them ups and big big crafts. Yeah. So but dads, man, dad's like to talk about it here in present danger. Yeah. Yeah.

There's all these Tom Clancy and then, oh, by the way, I got to tell you this. Sometimes, you know, with all these streaming, I feel like I'm somebody who gets very lost into just the Netflix world. So like I'm saying, when I turn on my streaming thing, I go to Netflix and I can forget that there's the other plot because they're there's so many now and they're so competitive. And yeah, I did get into like Handmaid's Tale for a while. And, you know, I've seen the Mandalorian on Disney, you know,

but you'll forget and I by chance because of that was like, you know, I never checked out Jack Ryan, which is the character, the Tom Clancy character on Amazon. I fucking have ripped through this season. That is not only a like a really, really good show, but holy shit. Did they spend real money making this? I mean, I don't know if it's public. I know this public.

They pay Krasinski like two million an episode. I feel like they spent a hundred million dollars making this season. It's really like it's impressive production. Yeah, it looks really good. Every episode is like it's like a what's the other one? The Timothy Treadwell Treadstone. Oh, yeah. Tread. Tread. That's a little that's different. I mean, that's it's good.

It's it's different, though. But this Jack Ryan thing was great. If I didn't fall asleep so much. So yeah, so they are doing a season three. What does it say there if you click on that link? Really good. So I bet that I mean, that's probably a COVID delay, right? That's got to be.

And this is a smart one, too. You feel like it's the same character. Dad, John, right? Yeah, it's the same character, which reminds me, too. What's it say? In the article. Yeah, it says delayed. Yeah, it's got to be coming out 2021.

Yeah, it's so good. This one's great. I love John. No, but I'll tell you this. If you're if you like that sort of thing and you haven't gone on prime to watch this, it's it's really good. Yeah, it's a great story. He's great in the part and it's a it's a it's really good characters right in the, like I said, the production date.

There's things like when you watch TV shows and there's there's like, you know, the shootout scene or the chase or the explosion. There's the TV version of it where you're like, oh, yeah, that's what that is. But in your brain tells you this is basically the version they could make with their budget. And then you watch a feature and you're like, well, holy shit,

you know, this thing doesn't they don't go short. Yeah, every episode is a fucking movie. It's really, really good. You know what I was thinking of, too? I don't. Did your dad ever have dad toilet books that were war oriented? Like my dad had the House on Garibaldi Street. Hold on in the shitter and like a five hundred page book

about the Holocaust, like the Third Reich. It would be like he loved to read about communism, KGB, CIA, same shit, Holocaust, same shit. Right. Yeah. Your dad had the toilet books. Also, toilet books. It's also a thing now where like you walk. You see my I used to visit the house more when I was younger,

you know, like every holiday you go to and there's a certain point where you're walking in the living room and you're like, don't you feel like you understand Hitler now? I think we all get it. Have you seen enough Hitler stuff? They love it. He's like, no. No, this battle and then and then they revisit,

like this is the battle where you're like, but I mean, you know all this. He's like, I like it. And then he just love their Hitler. I know there. And this is when the Germans came in Paris. Parisians didn't put up any fight. You're like, OK, yeah, we're going to have dinner soon. I don't know if you want to, you know, my dad loved to point out.

He's like, you know, by the way, that this Hitler is nothing. OK, Stalin killed more people than Hitler did. He loves to point out to bring out the body count. Yeah. Yeah. I've heard that from dad a lot. Dad's love to talk about that. I don't know why you guys always bring up Hitler. Yeah, Stalin's the real star.

No one talks about Stalin. Hello. I killed people to 20 million. No one's even giving me any credit. That's true. And I don't know why we don't talk as much. I guess because it's not as horrific or maybe we don't have as many images. I think it's probably it's as horrific. Yeah, maybe the mechanized death camp stuff.

Yeah, I think the targeted the targeted murder. When you're like, yeah, but like, what do you believe in? You know, let's kill you. That's probably the Jews, the gypsies, the mentally retarded were killed in the Holocaust. Yep. There's the full list. And history 101 with Christina P. My my dad always talk about it. Yeah, no. Oh, my house, by the way, it is all.

It's all World War Two books, Vietnam. He likes World War Two, Vietnam. Those are the. I like it too. He's doing a fucking. He's like putting together PowerPoint thing for Vietnam. That is cool, though, that he's going to present. Nice. Good. I mean, I but every time I hang out with your dad, I love hearing these stories.

I love learning about it. You ask him anything. I mean, he will tell you so and then like every year now, you know, I did it like a bit on stage, but like it really does grow every time I talk to him about what happened about getting something. Yeah, yeah, about the thrill of getting the enemy. Yeah, but tell me we did the right thing. OK, we could have mowed down villagers and stuff.

It's like we didn't do that. We did the right thing. He did right. Like he meant they targeted just the Viet Cong and not. Yeah, not. They try not to kill the innocent. Oh, yeah. No, that's a big thing. Yes. Oh, yeah.

That's like, you know, that's a big thing where they go, you know, the rules of engagement and and, you know, I think he said something about like rice hoppers you could shoot or something. But I don't know. I will have to get them on the phone sometime. He's got a lot of stories. He's got a lot. But yeah, dads love. Dad, I think and I think too, because

dads want to relive the trauma of that event. Like it's so traumatic war in that whole time. Like my dad always tell me stories about being 10 years old during the revolution and the Russians came through. And this is where I saw a soldier dead. This is where I picked up a grenade. I was 10 years old. I play with a grenade.

This is where we picked up machine guns and the snow and like they just love to tell you this because it's so I think it's so traumatic. It's traumatic. It is traumatic. Yeah. Of course it is. They let they love to relive the drama. What about you, Israeli dad talk about war a lot? I remember one time like not my parents, but I think on my dad's side, like we went to go visit family and they were like, oh, yeah,

I'm just going to leave you here for a little bit. And then after we had dinner, she was my great aunt was like, a do you want to see a documentary? I was like, OK. And she put on a Holocaust documentary of the camp that she was in. Oh, my God. Oh, God. And she's pointing out people that she recognized. Like this one was nice.

This one wasn't nice. Like it was like really fucking crazy. That's really crazy. Yeah. Jesus. So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, my grandmother, I got to ask her questions about stuff. When I was a teenager and I was like, so did you know that the Holocaust was going on? Did you know that they were killing Jews in these camps? And first of all, she was born in Germany and then they fled

whatever they fled from Germany to Hungary during the war. And she goes, she's like, yeah, of course, everybody knew. We just kind of, you know, you just didn't say nothing. You know, like, oh, I remember that day we were making lemonade. My grandmother and I were making lemonade and I was like, so what you guys knew? And she's like, yes, but, you know, you could smell it in the air, the smell of people burning. And what could we do?

What could we do? You just, you know, I mean, yeah, like. Well, you certainly couldn't be like, I'd like to have a word with whoever's in charge. Who's in charge? Yeah, like a group of Karens are going to go and deal with the Holocaust. Are you guys being causing a ruckus in the within these walls? I don't think it's going to. I know, but yeah, interesting. It feels kind of flippant, though, to be like, well, what are you going to do?

What are you going to do? That's kind of what she was like at the time, because she'd seen everything. I mean, I get it that somebody goes like, if people are murdering people, you know, what you can't be like, well, we have a petition going to stop it. But like, it's just weird to say. It is where she was like, yeah, we knew, but, you know, because we do. I think because also back then, they were so harsh. You guys are, you know, back in the day, it's a harder culture.

They'd already been through World War One. Now, this is World War Two. You know what the funny thing is? That's not the most fucked up thing you've told me about your grandmother. It's by far, by far her bathing suit. Yeah, that's the most fucked up thing. Yeah. So she used to my father wouldn't buy an air conditioner in the house. Instead, he would buy here in Los Angeles, LA, we grew up in the San Fernando Valley.

It was hot as balls. He would get the swamp cooler, a swamp cooler, which is terrible because all it did essentially was make the carpet damp. It was garbage. So my grandmother used to wear a onesie bathing suit, get in the pool. And then she would sit around in a wet bathing suit to stay cool in our town. And she'd be sitting at the kitchen table and she would go, look, I am cool. You are all hot. I am cool.

I'm wearing the vet bathing suit. So the wet bathing suit was her tactic to stay cool. And get a yeast infection. Can you imagine? Yeah. And she knocked her tooth out one time when she was visiting us from Hungary and she crazy glued it back in and she's fine. It works. It's fine.

You Americans are soft, man. That's all I'm going to say. Well, Americans, this is this is America. OK. Did you know that your car may have remote start on it operated through the key fob and you didn't even know it? For example, let me show you on this Camry. So here's your Toyota life hack. So here's the trick, Camry XS EV6.

Watch this, you hit lock, lock and then hold down lock. What's the start flashing? Watch it, baby. Well, yes. Well, well, I like that he's excited for a remote startup. That was pretty cool. It was very exciting.

It's been around. Been around for a minute. I didn't know you could do that. Did you know? Yeah. But you hit it three times and it does that. Well, I didn't know that that's on the Camry EVC model. But I mean, there's a number of startup. Bob's. Yeah, we've owned some.

I know. I never used that. Let's up the game a little bit. How about another model 2019 all new RAV4? Can the RAV4 do it, too? Let's check it out. One, two, hold it down. Three, hold down lock. Don't tell me that's going to work on this one, too. Come on, baby. Oh, it's lighting up.

It's lighting up like the fourth of July. Yes. Worked on that one, too. I am the man. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm the man. Oh, yeah. That's embarrassing. The dances. Well, of course it is. The old dances are. And also this guy definitely loves the hunt for red October.

Like there's not a chance in this world that this guy does not enjoy Tom Clancy. He's defecting. Now, the real question, the real question, because it directly affects me, will this system work on a 2018 Camry? I don't know. That's yours. That's important to know.

So let's see. We got that. We got one. Two. Three. Hold down. Are the lights flashing? Is it going to work? Oh, they're starting to flash.

They're starting to flash. Yeah, he's not allowed outside of the frame. Oh, it works. I'm the king of the world. His references are so old. How could you like? How could he do? How could you be that impressed by it still happening?

Yeah, I don't know. Wouldn't it be like one time? And he'd be like, oh, yeah, that works. But I don't even think I'd get that excited over the first time. He did a golf swing to celebrate. Yeah. Then a baseball swing.

Then he threw a ball. Then he caught the ball. When he did a Titanic on King of the World, which is 90 something. This is embarrassing. Somebody's perhaps married to this guy. Just be happy that you're fucking not. I would never do this shit.

Oh, my gosh, never. You don't get that excited. What did you get excited about the other day that I was really happy? You got excited for something. And I was like, this is good to see you happy like that. I don't know. I don't know.

Let's talk about the Holocaust. We found another. Remember the plastic chair guy? There was a guy who was so excited about chairs. That's going to bring up anything in this chair. Well, we got a program out loose. We got my white chocolate. This dude collects plastic chairs.

The kind of chair that when you do sit in, you're like, God damn, I wish they had better chairs here. That's the worst. He's like, these are my favorite chairs. There's an update. Oh, wow. Hello. Here's the current state of my plastic chair collection.

Oh, wow. I've got 400 items total down here. I have the stro-chairs. Those are good. I have school chairs. I have some Rotan cantilever-legged kitchen chairs. I have kid-sized chairs. So far, all the chairs suck.

I have things you cannot buy anymore. Various kids chairs. Speak for yourself. I'm a fan of it. I'm a Little Tikes model. Oh, I like the Little Tikes. I have the rare Step 2 kid-sized folding chair. I have some very large chairs.

Is it weird, though? The Little Tikes swivel chair. Do you think it's weird to have a collection that no one else is excited about? Like, nobody else sees this and is like, you have that? Everybody is like, why the fuck do you have all these things?

Bro, you have the rare Step 2 brown children's chair? Well, Step 2 products. As well as the Fisher Price chair. By the way, this looks like a home. It looks like he was like, well, we're going to have to get rid of the living room. We're going to problem with chairs. What about my chairs?

1984. Those ones are vintage. They haven't been made in many, many years. Yeah, I have a lot of various monoblock chairs. I mean, I would feel more comfortable if somebody was like, here's all my flesh lights. Here's 6,000 flesh lights. I'd be like, that's more,

you got your shit together more than the chair guy. This guy is so fucking insane. Well, you think about the amount of money he's spending to store all this stuff. Yeah. I mean, the whole house is full. That looks like a whole floor of the house. We could be leaving this room.

The video's not over. Michael, I have this kid's size chair with the tubular stuff. It's filthy too. Oh, it's filthy. It's filthy. Some of these are dirty. Why is he whispering? I don't know.

I also have my Girlflex Malagos. I thought he meant to say my girl. I thought he meant to say my girl. My girlfriend, yeah, me too. As well as the Girlflex Madre's Lounge Chair. I have the U.S. Leisure Woven Lounge Chair. This is crazy. This is such a big flex in his world

where he's like, checking out the chairs. He's whispering like it's a Rolex. You guys know that you have these chairs. I mean, we're still going through chairs. I'm just skimming through this. This is crazy. I mean, it's just... By the way, 90% of these look like

the exact chair next to it. You know. He knows the difference. There's still three more out there that I don't have. I have rubber-made chairs. The adult ones are on the bottom. Those are the kids' size ones. Is he hoping to sell these?

Is that the...? Well, that about covers the chair collection. Well, thanks for watching. Please subscribe. And remember to always be comfortable. That's a good tagline, at least. And remember, always be comfortable. Remember, always be comfortable.

And remember... Can I take a pitch real quick? Sure. Go ahead. All right. And you peed. And when you're done peeing, do you feel like... Live life 365. Did you feel like that? Live life 365.

Yeah. That's what I do. I live life 365. Live life 365. That's what I say every time I jade my D. Live life 365. You know, I have to just quickly discuss that your post vasectomy is wonderful.

Yeah. I'm really enjoying it. I think it's revitalized our love life. Pretty good. And also, I tried out Leigh Ann's beach technique on you. Sending her a gift this week. Yeah. If you guys want to hear that, it's where my mom's at.

Leigh Ann came on last time and discussed her winning beach technique that she does on Bird. And I tried it on Tom. And now you guys are like... Beach brothers. Is that what it would be called? Nobody mentioned that. Like beach technique, bros.

I guess. Are you going to talk about it with Bird? Sure. Be like, oh, now I know what you get. I don't know that I mean... Whatever. You were such a slut. All right.

Let's do some talks, man. Well, the board just crashed. I heard you bitches was looking for me. So there's, there are some updates, big updates. We can start by letting you know. Good morning, my queen above 18. Yes, it's time to wake up. Come on.

Yes, you are my queen. Oh my God. What? How did you sleep? I slept good. Did you sleep good? I hope you're rested and be ready for work. All right, my queen.

It's time to get up and you have a good day and call me when you can. I love you, my queen. You have a beautiful day. Jesus Christ. Well, that's a very creative talk. I've been thinking about this one. The POV. Four days.

I saw this a while ago and like I think about it at least once a day. It's the POV shot of him over you. Over you. Shirtless. And then the conversation is terrible. It's like... By the way, he did act. He waited for it.

Like he was like, what's that? Yeah. Well, how'd you sleep? I slept good. Right. He did a whole like... Right. It was real improv.

That's what's layer two of the creepiness is that part. Is the play acting and then that. I mean, look, the whole thing about the king, like we get it. He's just trying to get laid and that's a noble thing. Yeah. But the thing is, guys, there has to be artifice. Like you have to have... That's why men pick up guitars and play in bands to attract the girls.

You know, you can't just be like, hey, are you over 18? Show me your tits. There has to be... Well, you can. And then you'll get mocked mercilessly on our show for it, but... But you're right. Usually there's, you know, you like to be a little layer to it, right? Like a little...

Yeah, just some kind of... Put on a show. You put on the show and then you're like, why'd the girl ask to meet me? It's like, because you did the thing. You didn't just go nice tits. Right. Yeah. You showed or something.

Well, it's why men have built civilizations and become proficient in many different things to entice the woman. Competency is very attractive. Dr. Drew and I have talked about this on Dr. Dr. Dark, that women are attracted to skills. And that's what this lacks, I think. And I think that's why the King is so intriguing. But to be fair, it's still very appealing to some. So by all means, don't stop doing this.

Don't you dare stop doing this. This is still good. Yeah. Of course it's still good, Tom. And you understand that a lot of women find this attractive. A lot of women, so many women. You're in a relationship, I've heard. But other women who are maybe single and available are like, I don't know what you're talking about.

I'm mopping up my bed right now. Well, especially because you know what I like is that he does provide a surrogate boyfriend experience to all his queens. He's like, how was your midterm? You're going to do fine. Well, let's, you know, let's keep going here and let's see if we find any more. Let's see if we get to revisit the King here in a moment. Okay, let's go through what else? Some other talks.

Brown Vic Lighter bought it today, peeled off the sticker. This is like the other guy was very upset about. Wow, this is a whole lane of talks buying a Vic that misrepresented itself. That's correct, Tom. It's much like the consumer advocacy show fight back with David Horowitz. Tell you something. It's just like that. It's really interesting.

There's a certain type of guy that is figuring out that he's not happy about the big he bought. Most people just let it go. Just let it go. Yeah, yeah, you know, the factory. This is a wrap on this thing. But there's certain guys that go, uh-uh, you're not going to take advantage of me. Gotcha. Yeah.

Gotcha. You're not fucking me over, man. That's very cool. And you got it. He's like, look what I found. Yeah. He's very proud of himself. Skyler, you've been on hormones for five years.

How are you about to have a baby? Well, that's simple. I'm stopping testosterone. And actually I already have. I've been off testosterone for several months now. That's how I'm going to have a baby. But also the misconception is that folks who use testosterone can't get pregnant. That's very incorrect.

Testosterone is now the birth control. You can still get pregnant while on testosterone. So what I've done is I've been off of it for several months so that I can have a healthy men's cycle and ovulation so that I can have the best pregnancy possible. So now that that has returned and I battle my dysphoria every month with it, I'm happy to say that I'm ready to start trying to have a baby. And that's a whole nother part. But the fact is I got here because I stopped taking testosterone because my body is getting

ready without that hormone. Moving on. So let's look at the next one. God damn it. That makes me laugh. You know, you like murder. I like this stuff. This stuff makes me really laugh.

Ah, fuck man. I don't even understand what that bitch is saying. What the fuck? Yeah. We're looking at two dogs and one of them is not so natural. What are we looking at? What the fuck was that? I'd rather listen to Skyler.

What the fuck was that? This is an asshole that dyes their dog 500 different colors. Both dogs are like tie-died. I think it's so ridiculous. It's totally your business. That's a dick move. It's such a dick move. This dog does not want to be tie-died.

I hate when people mess with animals. So that really bothered me. I just thought it was silly. I thought you'd be more... Hi, everything! How are you to find out? Are you feeling right now? Hello, guys.

Channel to our welcome... Hello, channel. Welcome to my... Hello, guys. Welcome to our channel. Please, always be here. This was an youth hand-centenizer because corona disease is a very dangerous city.

And always keep social distinguish. Romeo, save me. Please like, share, and subscribe my video, guys. That was great. That was really good. The subtitles really did it. Well, they are really endearing. That was really sweet.

I'm not making fun of people trying to speak English. It's just the subtitling was really funny. It's very funny. That was actually very cute. Sweet, yeah. They're cool. Hey, mom. Do you know what she-they pronouns are?

I think so. Are they often used by people who identify as demigirl? Yeah, although you don't have to identify as demigirl since pronouns don't always equal gender. That's right. I'm still learning that. Why do you ask about she-they pronouns? Well, I've actually been considering using she-they pronouns for myself.

Oh, wow. That's interesting. Is that recently? No, I've been considering them for a while, actually. Oh, that's funny. That's actually more surprising to me than you being gay. But there's one thing I don't understand about she-they pronouns. What is it?

Well, a lot of people just take the easy route and call you she-her. That's one of my concerns is that people just won't use my they-them pronouns, but it would make me a lot happier if they did. Okay. What are you doing? How many of these are we going to watch? Well, I just wanted you to know in case one of our sons comes to us with this discussion, you'll know what the template is, the correct way to have a discussion with your kids about

their pronouns. Do you know how to talk to Alice about his pronouns or Julian? Julian's all two and a half. He's going to decide pretty soon what his gender preference is, you know? We talk to them about it every day. Julian, what are you? Are you a boy or a girl? I'm pooping.

I know. So, finish. And then tell me your pronouns, stupid. What are you? And then I ask, it takes some, then I have to ask him consent to change his diaper. It's a whole thing, babe. Do you want to be a good parent or not? You got to get on board.

Do you want to be a good parent or not? Yes, I want to be a good parent. In 2020, this is what it takes. What percentage of the population does this affect? Is there no stat on that? Is there a statistic on that? Like how many non-binary kids are there? Yeah, like what percentage?

I mean, it can't be coming up this much and not being substantial, I'm guessing. The study revealed that at least 0.5% of Americans identify, well, that says as transgender or gender non-conforming. Right, so it's even less than 0.5%. Right. Well, what about that drop-down? What percentage of the population? Well, according to the 35% of the nearly 28,000 transgender respondents to the anonymous online survey identified as non-binary, 35% of 28,000, but we're about 330 million.

So what is that roughly? So the odds are pretty good that both your sons are going to be non-binary, so it's time to practice the script. I'm telling you. This is good. Did you know that Ellis is kindergarten on the applications? They're like, what's his gender, male, female, or non-binary? They already ask in kindergarten. Well, you look, this is, I mean, obviously, one thing I'm pretty certain of is Ellis.

Ellis is definitely... He identifies as male. He identifies as male. Yeah. So is Julian, though. He's sweeter, though. No, no, but I'm saying like, Ellis is more verbal because he's five and he's just like, that's for girls. Like, he's real aggressive about it. I'm like, okay.

So now I'm thinking that he got it from you because I've never said that to him. He's like, I'm not a fucking chick. Like, okay. I don't, I don't. And I have tried, like I used to take him to this baby play class and they would encourage gender-neutral toys. And I remembered they were giving Ellis Barbies and such and he would be like, what's that thing? And then he would just, he wanted nothing to do with it. And no one, nobody persuaded him either way.

How to beat your wife? Let's imagine, here, how are you? My wife is obviously a boy, but let's imagine that he is the wife. This is a father and a child. How should a husband beat his wife? First, he must admonish her. In other words, he should advise her and he should refrain. He should start beating his last resort.

Beating in Islam. Beating in Islam. Wait, don't lose. The husband must make his wife feel his strength. Why aren't you listening to me? How many times do I have to tell you? How many times do I have to tell you to listen? Didn't I tell you not to leave the house on my permission?

See how? A little bit of rebuke. Obviously, she's starting to talk back. I told you not to leave the house. How many times? I told you not to leave the house. The beating is light, brothers. This is a real talk.

This is a real Islamic lesson. I'm sorry. Islamic leasing for wife beating. Quran verse 434. Okay. Did you get the point that he's not saying really beat the shit out of her. You have to admonish her verbally first.

And get a little shoulder tap. Don't be dumb. Why did you leave the house without asking? I got to say this. Honestly, it's pretty cool to watch. It's good advice and it kind of changes my view. Of? Beating a woman.

Well, he's admonishing her verbally. Yeah, that works for us. That's a good thing to do. You could use one or two of these every once in a while. That's what I'm saying. It's not a big deal. And then also, that's not going to, what are you going to call the cops?

Light with you. Yeah, light. Well, he says the beating is light, brothers. Right, right. Keep it light, bro. I told you not to leave that. Try it. I told you not to leave the house without asking permission.

That's no biggie. But you're also your learning. I could see your learning. I could see your learning in your eyes. In 15 seconds, we're going to tell you why we're lonely as shit. One, we don't wear face diapers. Two, I will not get the flu shot or the Rona vaccine. And three, we voted for Big Daddy Don,

which takes away most of our female friends' options. Hallelujah. Very cool. Thank you. Very cool. Those are the cool girls. Yeah, I like that one. Bro, these jizzes.

Wow, bro. What? What the fuck? Hey, bro, that don't count. Every single time I come out here, there's always some crazy shit going on. That's just a group of kids playing on their roof. They seem pretty small.

Those little kids are under 10. Yeah, they're like four, five, six-year-old. Yeah. And there's not an adult with them. He was like, yo. Yeah, he did call them jits. He sure did, yeah. What's that?

I don't know. I've never heard of it before. I don't think it's a word for you. Bro, these jizzes. Wow, bro. What's jits? I don't know. Google it.

He did. Oh. Oh, I'm coming back. I don't fucking... Did you see that, bitch? This guy is my new favorite. That's pretty good. Man, he's got, he dresses up fancy

and he'll go to like the yarn store and do these silly little things. He's just, he's fancy. He's got strong Prince vibes. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Really special. Very cool.

Very cool. Do I identify as a dominant? Yes. If you play with my hair while I'm laying on your lap, am I going to go from daddy to baby real quick? Also, yes. Good to know. Remember, when you're burying a body,

make sure that you cover it with an endangered plant so it'll be illegal for anybody to dig it up. That's really good advice. That's a good hot tip. That's really good advice. You just got to learn endangered plants. Yeah. Yeah, no one can touch your shit, man.

When you're burying a body, bring an endangered plant. Hey, nobody touched my stuff. Oh my God. Good morning, my queen's above 18. You got the king here over here at Walmart with a young lady. This is one of my queens.

She's 26 years old and she wanted to make a TikTok video. You guys need to jump on my page and congratulate her and tell her that she's very beautiful. You guys have a good day. Enjoy and I will talk to you soon. Say hi.

Hi. Does she not have a name? You guys have a good day. Now get on my page and wish her to the family. She's a queen above 18. You guys have a good day. This is a great talking.

Wish her to the family. As we always like to say, we wish you to the family. Wish you to the family. I know. There's a lot to unpack in this talk. Number one, it would be like,

I think he was like, wow, you're really beautiful at Walmart. She's like, oh, thanks. It always feels good to hear a compliment. Yeah. And he's like, you ever done the king challenge?

She's like, what? He's like, oh, you don't, are you on TikTok? She's like, yeah, I have a TikTok. You don't recognize me? She was like, no. He's like, I got a pretty big following and then he probably showed her

and she was like, wow. Yeah. 10,000 people, whatever it is. He was like, you want to do one? I love he's like, she wanted to make a talk and that this is the talk. Right. She's probably thinking like, oh,

is that like a duet thing? Are you going to dance? I've seen exciting. I've heard of TikTok. Yeah. And then he was like, just sit here by the bathroom. And I'll get people.

And then he said, jump on my page, even though people watching this are on his page. Oh, Tom, you're reading too much into this. It's pretty cool. She seems thrilled. Can I tell you?

I don't even think the king has named his username. I think he's like user one, zero, zero, zero, five, seven. It's the auto thing. Bro, you need to name your fucking channel. Especially if you like really took a following. Like if you are, if you're really into it, you should be like, oh, my name is.

Is at the king above or the king above 18 or the king challenge or fucking something. Anyways, this chick, obviously, like you said, doesn't have no idea who he is. She was just shopping and he just cycled up to her because she's so she's like, what? He's like, you want to be in a celebrity's video? Celebrity.

Yeah. You don't recognize me. Totally. He totally did that. Yeah. I'm percent right. And she's so like, like just like a cute. Yeah.

She's just like, I'm just a Walmart. I'm trying to pee and then this guy started talking to me. Yeah. He's like, you want it? You want to gain like a thousand followers? He's like, okay. She doesn't care. She doesn't care.

She doesn't care. She doesn't read like, I'm on your top. I'm on the king's thing. Whatever page. Hi, ladies. Some people told me that I should come on here and see if there's any single people that want to date. I live in the New York area.

Upstate New York. I'm single and I'm looking for somebody special. Now, I do respect Jerry Vaughn 73 Gmail. Because like he's showing you what he's got. He's got a cool apartment. He's got some pots on the ceiling. He wears his boxer shorts. He can rock a tank top.

No, like none of your intuition tells you that this is a bad post to find someone. Someone told me to maybe meet somebody here. So here I am. I'm in my boxers and undershirt and buy my pots. Hit me up. What? The fuck?

It's so bad and the angle is terrible. The lighting is terrible. I mean, it's just got all the elements. Like no, like no party goes. I'll put pants on for this one. I'm trying to, I'm trying to date. I'll put pants on for my first post about Jerry Vaughn 73. My first post about dating.

What did he put pants on? That's what I'll do. Just pants on a shirt. Why did he put pants on? Just put pants on. That's all you have to do. You could even get away with the ridiculously tight tank top. But I think you're right that it's not even a tank top.

It's an undershirt. Yeah, it's like it's so tight. He knows how tight it is because he covered his belly during it. I'm going to put my hands over this. This feels ridiculous. I'm single. Anyone want to date? I'm going to go get pants now.

The fuck, man. Just put on clothes. That's all I have to do. This guy's not done. You can tell. No, that's the thing is that he's. That just shows you like how tracked out you can be in this world.

Any friend that knows guy be like, oh, you know this is really bad. Way to get a date. Why? Well, you didn't have any pants on. Anybody that would want to date you would be like, this guy doesn't have the sense to put on pants. Because I will tell you he's made follow up talks.

I don't know if they're on this. But he does try to entice the ladies. He's like, look, I can cook. I make spaghetti. He's a nice guy. He's sweet. Yeah, he's not completely unhelpable. That's a word.

Help whatever. Hopeless. Yeah, like he's. He looks like he's gainfully employed. He looks clean. He looks like he's got stuff. He doesn't live in a van or like. No, he's not out of his mind.

No, he's not like this big lighter. Says brown. And now it's not. I pulled the wrap off. White. Right. Like he should be able to get a date. He should.

But he's the kind of guy who is single. Because he doesn't know to wear pants. When you meet people. That's his. I know. You know. That's too bad because like he's sweet. And I was very sweet.

I hope that Jerry Vaughn 73 at G-Nail.com. Gets pants. That's his Tick Tock name. I would date. No. Piloto piloto. Piloto piloto piloto. Holy shit.

Yeah. There's a whole new lane on Tick Tock. It's called Cartel. Cartel talk. Yeah. I'm going to draw cartels. Now I put this one because I need you to translate. I'm not quite sure what's happening here, Tom.

Well, piloto is pilot, right? And he's saying, and this has pirates on the Pacific. So I assume what's happening here is these guys are being chased by either authorities or other cartel people. And it looks like they actually made contact. By the way, the boat that's behind them looked enormous and moving at a crazy rate of speed. Let's watch this again.

Piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto piloto Crazy. That's real. That's someone's Tick Tuck. Yo. There's a bunch of cartel talks right now. They've really gone up and present. I saw one you showed me the other day where this dude was cooking Coke.

Uh huh. And he was like here the coronavirus cure is right in here. And he's cooking cocaine. Yeah. Yeah. That one I sent over the weekend. You probably haven't had a chance to process that one yet. But cartel is crazy.

They're showing planes landing, cooking drugs. And then the prison talks have gone way up right now too. I saw a bunch of Thanksgiving talks for people like we're still brain Thanksgiving in prison and then they have music on them which is why we can't play them on this show. Holy shit. Yeah. It's so exciting what's happening. That's intense because this is like this sock right here could have like six deaths attached

to it. Yeah. Like this is really insane. I know. Queens above 18. I got this young lady that gave me a text. A text. A text.

Saying that she's going to call Child Protective on me. Uh oh. I have no idea why. But you guys need to go on her page and check her out. She's right above me. She's kind of a page stalker. I don't know. But nobody's allowed to be on my page under 18.

Yeah. By law. And she says she's very uncomfortable watching my videos. Right. I didn't tell her to watch. That's a good point. That's true. And she's well over 18 so.

Yeah. She can move it along. I have no idea why or what her problem is. No idea. Queens above 18. I love you. You guys have a good night. I'd like to take a moment to stand up for the king.

King you are 100% correct. This lady who's uncomfortable I think is just voicing her opinion that seeing your page makes her physically uncomfortable. But you don't need to. Yeah. She can just move it along. She can swipe up and go to the next talk and you don't have to change anything about your perfect page.

So everybody wish her to the family. You're doing wish her to the family. You're not doing anything illegal or wrong. That's right king. You did this one. You're right. But I have to say there's some drama in the king's world. Uh-oh.

Yeah. Good evening my kings and queens above 18. I am going to withdraw the king challenge. What? There is a lot of haters out there that's got their little pussies up and are fine. Wait a minute. The king challenge just. What?

This is a YMH exclusive. Exclusive. Exclusive. Yeah you guys. Yeah. So there's been a lot of drama on the king's account lately and it hasn't been good for him. And he said people have their pussies in a bind.

Yes. And they're acting like little whiner crybabies. Yeah. If you are 18 and above you are allowed on my page. You're allowed. Okay. If you are 18 and below you are not allowed on my page. Well then they're 18 though.

I don't care. Wait a minute. I'm not gonna tell you again but about it. If I find you on my page and you're under 18 I'm gonna delete you. You might slide by a couple times and tell me you're 18 but once I find out I'm deleting you. That would be right on the line. That was that.

You guys are the biggest crybabies on the earth. Yeah. I swear to God. My queens above 18 I love you all. I love that this also has like the narrative of like people are trying to get in here you know like a club like an ex like look the line is around the block and we are packed. You're gonna have to wait and I'll tell you who's allowed in and who's not allowed in. He did say that 18 and above you're allowed in but 18 and below you're not allowed in.

It's a little contradictory. Doesn't seem fair. Not sure. Doesn't seem fair to those who are 18 and below. That's true. What about those 18 year olds? Yeah. He was like I messed up but I will say I do admire that he's really taking this account

seriously. Yes. And monitoring these comments and I think fame has gone to his head a little bit. Very very much so very much so and looks like there's one final update here. Oh my goodness. I don't know if I'm ready to click this one. You're gonna be sad. Good evening my kings and queens above 18.

Hello. But I'm ignoring you. I cannot post anything on my page or answer any of your questions. They said I was violated or something like that. You were violated? And I can't post anything. Oh dear. Hell I didn't even get a dinner or a thank you.

Damn and they violated me. Wow. At least I didn't feel it. All right my queens you guys have a beautiful Thanksgiving and I will be back probably Wednesday. I love my queens above 18. My kings you take care of my queens while I'm gone. Okay. Don't disrespect them.

Thanks. You hold a high honor. You take care of the kingdom while I'm gone. You guys have a beautiful night. I love my kings and queens above 18. You know I do appreciate that he always includes us meaning the men the kings out there. Yeah. Why is that?

What's that about? Is he soliciting videos from the kings above 18 on the download? I think he's trying to not be like be like it's just for me so he's allowing you sharing the videos. Yeah. Letting the men and get involved to it. It really makes me makes me feel included and safe. So I like that.

Very cool. Yeah. The POV one is really the capper for me. Like I think yeah when he is I don't like that one squatting over the I mean laying over you like good morning. How'd you sleep? I slept good. My coffee.

All right. We got to get ready to work. The creepier one was when he's like you're going to do fine on your midterms. Oh my God. You got your your finals are coming up. You're going to do just fine. I bet you can offer that girl three Chanel bags and she'd be like no I'm not not doing it.

Also she'd be like where's my Chanel bag. He'd be like I got you this t-shirt. You put on your boob queen on the back do a little dance for me. Yeah. What do you think you're seeing? Can you describe what you're seeing right here on the screen? There's a man in a wheelchair and he's in front of a counter and he's throwing something behind the counter.

He's pissed. He's wheeling away and he's going to leave the store. Nope. Not until he goes and he gets a basket. He's got a basket. Yep. He's pretty. He's got a few of them.

A lot of them. He's throwing one. He's throwing it. Throwing it over. It looks like a bed bath and beyond or something like that. He's throwing the baskets over. He's upset like a toddler tantruming security. This is what we do to our toddlers.

This is like a toddler. You have to take the thing away that they want to throw. Yeah. And he's still mad. Stop throwing that down the stairs. Stop throwing it upstairs. No treats for you. No cartoons.

You're not going to watch any more cartoons today. Just stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

Oh. That guy in the wheelchair fell over. I'm gonna start crying. You're like, all right, I love you. I'm sorry. Oh, that's poor man. He has no legs. Well, yeah.

Oh my gosh. Dude, he's got good upper body strength. No shit. Yeah. He got back in the chair. He's got an air vent. He's gonna go back in. He's not giving up.

He's very resilient. He looks really fit. Yeah. He just broke that thing. He is your fuck, dude. He's really strong. Sure. That dude's tight.

Yeah. I kind of liked him. Yeah. He should be a superhero. I agree. He avenges people. He's pretty dope. Yeah?

Yeah. Wheelchair guy. Wheelchair guy. I would watch that guy all day. Dude, he was fly. You see how he moved on that thing? He could fly around in that thing. You know what I'd like to start a petition to do?

Because you made it really, you know, there's nothing as important as inclusion. Yes. And I feel like there should be some type of petition to get it done. Disabled person to be the next bond or Batman. That's a great idea. You know what I mean? Like why can't James Bond or Batman be a disabled trans vet? Why?

Hold on, Tom. Why is that not a thing? I'm a little offended because you also ignored women of color. If I can't Batman or James Bond be a disabled trans black trans vet, why? That's very ableist of you, Tom. It'd be so cool to see James Bond. What about an amputee? Pull up and be like, shaking not stirred.

You can't change the Aston Martin with a driver to get me. Like that, right? He's not quick on the draw. That's for sure. I don't know why that can't be a thing. Cultural push. Oh, goodie. What does it say?

Go back to make the next James Bond disabled transit. What? That's not true. What the fuck? Is this real? No, it's got to be like, no, is this an onion article? It's a meme, right? Oh, thank God.

What do you mean? It's the same exact thing that we just said. That's crazy. That does make sense. That makes sense that that's out there. Yeah, it's a meme. It's a meme. Holy shit.

Wow. I really thought that was a news thing, but what about Batman? Disabled Batman? Yeah. Yeah, guys, is it so hard? Do better. Do better. Also, let me speak for most people.

We want to see that. Yeah. Of course we want to see that. I want to see Batman need oxygen. I want to see him. I'd love to see an amputee Batman. You never see him. You never see it.

You never see a superhero missing limbs or in a wheelchair. No. Except for Magnum. Or having fluid sexuality. You always see these superheroes bagging the babe. Why can't he hook up with somebody else? Absolutely right. A guy, a cool guy.

Absolutely right. We're being so, we're excluding so many people. God damn it. So upsetting. That was really cool. I'm really glad we have that. What does this say here? As the new rules come into force, I wanted to know if people understand what's expected

of them now. It's good to be back. I said to my friend that runs the Grand Mosque, it's nice to see you open. I think as long as people keep their distance, they won't have these fire, whatever, fire breaks anymore. As long as people keep their distance and don't get too excited, they'll all be fine. Wow. That's a Welsh accent.

Oh wow. Yeah. I mean, why can't Batman talk like that? That's true. I mean. That's so, we're xenophobic of us. Yeah. Fire breaks.

I don't know. What the? What the fuck is she saying? I don't know. Fire. Fire breaks. Fire breaks. Fire breaks.

What the fuck is she talking about? I don't know. I don't know. What was it? Somebody sent an email in and they were like, thank you guys for showing the best and the brightest that Scotland has to offer. Oh yeah. Barely we gave you.

We didn't read any of these. Did we read any of these? Well, almost here. Look, go ahead. These are in response to drumline. You know, Nadav's love of drumline has really, really inspired the emails this week. And what are those? These are more drumlines.

Oh, drumline? Except for this one. Okay. I mean, people are really upset about Nadav loving drumline. Tim and Kristen. I was just watching the newest YMH live when the subject of drumline was brought up as Nadav's favorite movie. I just wanted to let you guys know I was in drumline for six years.

And while the movie is based on a historical black college drumline and the hazing is real, the movie is still completely dog shit. I hope Nadav doesn't let his kids watch this movie or they will grow up. Our worded love you, Sam de Tejas. I jeans, I believe that drumline has the exact same storyline as the Queen's Gambit. It's not. The main character was born with talent and a specific thing, but they have to get past their hubris to be the best.

Kristen, if you like the Queen's Gambit, you should like drumline. Tim, I trust you keep it high and tight. So watch both and weigh in. Keep Feathernut brother, Megan, if it's Megan, not Megan or Megan, because my parents weren't our worded there and they named me. Well, a lot of people are. Well, Megan, I brought this point up on where my mom's at that it's not a new story. This the arrogant young, but by the way, the Queen's Gambit was orphaned genius at chess.

Is it a real story? It's great. The guy from drumline didn't know his dad, so it's pretty much the same. He's not a G. Point. Point. Counterpoint. Queen's Gambit is like drumline just with chess instead of drums.

One more here. Hey, mommies, I'm not certain, but I'm pretty sure drumline has contributed to a cultural phenomenon that has outpaced its humble drumline origins, and that's the invention of the mic drop. Of course, in the film, it was a drumstick drop, but the body language of holding it out in front of you and dropping it as punctuation for emphasis definitely originated in drumline so clown it, but it's made an indelible mark on culture and will live on forever. Keep Feathering It Chomos.

Okay. Well, big one for Ndave. Wow. Didn't realize. Very cool. Very cool. Let's go out on something, one more video that I think you'll enjoy before we leave here.

Queens. You got it. So what gives you the right to just... Really? Yeah, I'm going to fucking record you. What gives you the right to just roll up and take a piss? You're in public. I can tell you're pissing.

I was emptying something out. No, you weren't. Where's the bottle then? What a fucking dumbass. You're a fucking dumbass. You're a fucking dumbass. No, I'm not. You are.

You are. No, you are. What? This food? Yeah. Some YouTube channel or something? No. I'm using it to them so they can have you charged because you're pissing in public, you fucking

idiot. You don't need to call me names, man. You just called me a dumbass. Well... Didn't you? Yeah. So then I'm going to call you fucking names back. You can't even park it right here anyway.

I have to go in here. We're not supposed to park it. You go park it around back where the truck parking is. We're not delivering here though. So go park it in back. There's no truck parking right here. You're not even parked properly anyway. You're fucking...

There you go. That was the dumbest fight I've ever heard. You are. You are. Well, if you say that's the dumbest fight you ever heard, I raise you another one. That's karma, bitch. That's what you get for lying in court. Karen.

Batman. Karen. Can you have a conversation? Look at you two. You don't know how to have a conversation. What up against the property line? You don't think that's intimidating? You try to be intimidating.

You don't fucking intimidate me, fat man. This is ridiculous. You don't intimidate me, fat man. Okay? You don't intimidate me, fat man. I'm trying to have a conversation. By the way, isn't it... This is like when...

You know when something is like a new cultural phenomenon and then grandparents say it? You're like, wow, the fact that Karen took fire to the point where everybody knows it. It's like when a song, like when you're... It's like bling-blang. Yes. Everybody was saying bling-blang. It's like a grandmother was like, I'm getting jiggy with it. You're like, well, we can't listen to that song anymore.

You know what I mean? It's... Yeah. Karen is over. Karen has completely, completely gone mainstream. It's really wild. We were talking about repairing the fence. And she is...

You don't intimidate me at all. You don't intimidate me, fat man. Damn. Don't come on my property. Get your ass back in your fucking garage. Get your ass back in your fucking garage, fat man. Fuck, hey. Get your ass back in your house.

No! Nobody wants to hear you. Nobody wants to hear you. I don't have that problem. I don't have that problem. I don't have that problem. I don't have that problem. You do.

You go back to the house, fat man. Ooh. She's... You know? You try me, fatso. Yeah, you try me, fatso. You say that enough times, though. That fat man...

That fat man is going to come over there. Fat man. I think she's inviting some fat trouble into her house. Fat man. Oh, yeah? I think so. Come on, fatso. Yeah, you keep...

You know, you're just poking. Fat, fat, fat, fat. Then all of a sudden... He's going to eat you. Fat guy puts your fucking head through a, you know... Oh, yeah. ...through a brick. He's going to eat you.

You know what I mean? Just grabs your head. Boop! Side of the house. Uh-oh. What happened? I'm sorry. I'm fat.

She shouldn't antagonize dudes. I wouldn't do that. It is a real... That's the thing, man. You know what I mean? Yeah, don't do that. All you need is a little unstable neighbor for this to go. Oh, yeah.

And then that's how she died. Oh, yeah. Yeah. This bitch had never been hit before. Never been hit. She doesn't have an Islamic husband like me. That's a good one. I know what you like.

That's really good. Okay. Well, it was a lot of fun. It was fun. Traumas. God, I'm so glad I got the allergy medicine. I know. That was wild.

That was crazy. I wonder what you're allergic to. I don't know. I still think... Juice. Juice. Juice. Anyways, we need to close out.

We have a song here, Down to the Mountain by... What is it? Oh, is it Captain Marcel? It's by Redorath. Redorath. It's a new one. Redorath. Okay.

Thank you for supporting us with the live show. Really, really, like I said, enjoyed doing it. We will be announcing another event next week. Okay. So next week you'll hear about the next event. Okay. I think it's pretty exciting. And that's that, Jean.

I love you, Mommy. Love you too. Bye, guys. Bye, Jean. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.