Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - 599 - Rob Iler - Your Mom's House with Christina P and Tom Segura

Episode Date: April 14, 2021

SPONSORS: - Go to https://Saatva.com/theshit to save $200 on your order - Go to https://stamps.com/ click on the Microphone at the top of the homepage and type in MOM to get a 4-week trial PLUS free postage and a digital scale. - Get 25% off and zero delivery fees on your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter code YMH - Go to https://Whoop.com and use code "Yourmom" for 15% off - Go to https://squarespace.com/MOM for a free trial and when you’re ready to launch, use the offer code MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. - Get 15% Off and Free Shipping at https://MeUndies.com/MOM - Head to https://policygenius.com/ to save up to $1,055 per year on your home and auto insurance rates - Download Best Fiends FREE today on the Apple App Store or Google Play JEANS UP!! Tom Segura is joined by Sopranos actor and YMH super-fan Robert Iler. Once again, Christina P is rocking a bit of a new look. They discuss annoying things people do in public, Rob's biggest drug binges, auditioning for roles, and Tom's most recent experience on The Joe Rogan Experience. They watch videos of a guy who was interrupted while browning, an Indian bee attack, a cool guy's message to Iggy Azalea, a massive bicycling accident, a new video from Norman Summerton, and the "Plan B Russian Roulette" girls reacting to YMH Live 4!

Hey guys we got a bunch of new merch right now go to store.ymhstudios.com and get that hot new gear. Pig will not disappoint you. We will have fun together. Oh hey big tiddler animal. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening Chomos. Thank you for joining us another episode of your mom's house podcast. I'm Tom Segura with me as always is the lovely and talented Christina P. How's it going today? That's great. Well I gotta tell you I've never loved you more. Really happy today to have a very special guest with us for the entire duration of the show. It is the

great Rob Eiler from the pajama pants podcast. Thank you for coming Rob. Thanks for having me ma'am. Christina and I are both really excited to see you. Yeah I'm getting this text I was pumped man. Yeah yeah. I'm happy to be here yeah. Thank you. We're gonna have a lot of fun today. There's a lot of things to talk about a lot of clips to watch. There's also part of me that wonders like did half a million people just go oh no okay no a lot of people are like yeah yeah and we're not gonna hear so many you know chatty nonsensical estrogen vibes if you know what I'm saying. Uh-huh. Right I'm just you know I'm playing with you

right okay all right well there's some really really important stuff to get into I think we should open the show and then get into some of the biz stuff and then we'll you know we'll rock and roll so here we go opening clip let's make sure the volume is up it is let's go what are you doing try to take a shit man just fucking knock the door down what the fuck my knee open trying to take you do you do it fucking it was right man who was Randy don't bring anyone loving to this welcome to your mom's house with Tom Segura and Christina Pajitz and Christina Pajitz welcome to your mom's house

try to take a shit man don't kick the door open that would by the way that dude was like he had like real stoner kind of vibes you know he's like bro like what's man you know like I would not be cool I wouldn't be cool at all I'd be so upset it's also interesting the type of people who still will agree to wear a mask right like that guy he's you think a guy who's kicking in the door of a stall in a bathroom would probably be like fuck corona I'm like fuck masks I'm just not dude but I know and it's also like I mean we've all he's got like the N95 he's really taking this dude but like it's we've all like check the stall door and you're like

oh like to go like I'll just kick this fucking thing off the hinges I mean it's a real aggressive way to open a door one time I was at an after hours like you know New York City to be all these fucking crazy after hours and I took this girl who I should not have taken to an after hours like she wasn't that type of girl but it's like seven in the morning and we're at the after hours and she's like can you go she goes to the bathroom she comes back she's like will you go with me to the bathroom whatever I'm like you're fine like we're in a place with like the windows painted black and there's like it's not a good vibe but

I'm like you're fine like just go to but she's like please so I go to the bathroom with her and I'm like you're gonna be okay and we get there and the door was off the hinges Jesus man so what she asked me to do was like put the door cover the cover the hole and stand there and make sure nobody like was looking at her go to the bathroom did she pee yeah I think she was just yeah yeah I think we we really don't think about how often they're shitting you know yeah I try Christina because we have to shit sometimes at random hours and you're like oh I don't know I guess I never consider that that chick might be taking

a shit too and you think I've heard a lot about like when girls are dating a guy and they go on vacation and stuff like she'll go she'll be like oh I need to go to the store and get something but she'll go to the hotel bathroom to shit yeah that's a big that's a big yeah which like good like wow what a lady what a lady yeah before I forget okay a couple big big biz announcements for us first of all thank you to everybody that saw the last live show the last streaming live ymh live number four it is now on our rentals page ymh studios comm slash rentals please go and enjoy there are other episodes from past live

shows to bear shows I'm all the past ymh lives the new years etc etc they're all there so go ahead and check that out then I'm extremely stoked to tell you that if you go to the store store it out ymh studios comm we have partnered with one of my favorites Jeremy fish who's a brilliant artist designer has developed for us and with us the Jeremy fish collection so there's ymh there's two bears stuff there's a big nod to my my love of extra ice in my coffee and even fed smoker designs these are not like regular designs there they are works of art and because of that we went and got like the best materials that we could

find for the garments the shirts mug etc the coffee tumbler it's all like high high high quality stuff and we're elated it's all limited run so the stuff is not probably gonna last that long but we're so thrilled and want to thank Jeremy fish for working with us on this I'm really really excited about it check it out store.ymh studios comm and lastly a huge announcement and I know that I don't know if Christina if you want to go ahead and take this one what's gonna happen May 5th okay I'll take it then so we are going to be doing your mom's house live recording in front of a live audience on May 5th at the West Palm Beach

Improv the whole crew's coming out we're bringing cameras we're bringing a whole setup you can get tickets that go on sale this Wednesday that would be April 14th April 14th they're on sale the show is May 5th at the West Palm Beach Improv we're coming out we're shooting recording the whole thing in front of a live audience if you want to get tickets they're on sale Wednesday we're extremely excited to be able to do this so thank you to everybody that will come out to that and we will make it like a big special release I won't be streaming live but we're gonna try to cut it and edit it turn it around and put it up on

our Reynolds page as fast as we can so we're thrilled about that and I wanted to tell you that as well and that's it that's okay that's all the business it's out of the way now back to this guy I mean what that's an interesting question what how would you handle you're taking a shit and somebody kicked the fucking door open and it fell on you I mean listen I'm not a big guy but I think I'd be fighting with a shitty ass yeah are you kind of what are you gonna like not like this guy though he's he's oh no no no like even if I'm not fighting that's never me yeah like dude what do you do yeah I'm taking a dookie bro you made a

mistake he's ridiculous and then like but you know he might be talked because he is trying to put it but I'd be like if for any reason you did kick the door in as soon as like you're gone like he's trying to talk like oh my bad and like my bad dog back on like it's just come on dude yeah I like also my favorite I think my favorite part of this whole thing is I'll just latch this door back on yeah at the end yeah you know I mean like it came off easy yeah dude because of brute force you kick the fucking door like what are you doing try to take a shit man

just fucking knocked the door down like it was locked I thought it was locked it was cuz I was taking a shit that that guy got the best case scenario that he got that guy on the toilet the best yeah he's gonna do what are you doing dude he could have gotten so many guys who are like you said I'm fighting you with a shitty ass right now for sure yeah yeah yeah you do that to like a fucking gorilla of a dude you know I mean I think the guy taking a shit's like six five two ninety and you're like oh and we also the mindset of someone to be chilling in that stall with like his pants around his ankles taking a shit

like I'm crazy about shitting yeah but you know like he might be down to you know throw some hands or yeah whatever like he's down to get messy like he's very comfortable in the public stall he very much is yeah yeah like some people would be I gotta cover up or something this to pull his phone out yeah that's I did do you think there's a chance this might be fake I mean there's a there is a fake there's always the fake possibility my whole thing about the phone is that like a lot people take a shit with their phone out so that also makes kind of sense but it is kind of odd that it would be that well orchestrated and that

he's not that upset and I think his knee might be a little more fucked up than that like his knee might be shattered from that door falling on yeah it could be it could be I'll tell you what I think is not fake at all yeah oh that's a little shit oh that wasn't fake yeah they should make a beat with the screams yeah and then and then do the rap over the beat I'll tell you what someone's gonna do that yeah great someone's gonna definitely do that

you know the crazy thing is is like that could be the number one freestyle or where he's from we we don't know we definitely don't know and that dude that dude could be like the Jay-Z of fucking Bengali or wherever he is was he trash or was he like sick I don't I don't know I was into it I was like yeah man yeah keep going it rhymed to me keep keep keep going till those bees are right oh my god we we both share a complete and total disdain for a couple public acts one whistling in public the the guy that whistles in line when you're like oh that's waiting to get a coffee and you're like I it takes everything inside of me to go

what what the fuck are you doing like to not say that what are you doing man like we're all we're inside it's gonna echo in here are you out of your fucking mind it's it's it's a mental illness yeah I think I heard one time I don't know if it's true that a somebody doing that particularly indoors like in a closed space that it is a form of like asserting dominance because you're you know I mean you're you're kind of like going like oh this is I'm this is my space now right and everybody else has to like listen to this performance of yours and they don't have a choice unless they go hey stop fucking whistling man yeah it's

just it's a it's a dick it's it's hard it's aggressive it's passive aggressive I guess I mean it's it's not that different it's not that different than somebody on a speakerphone which I have complete disdain for now you're talking my language I yeah that that gets me fucking good but then like a thing with the whistling thing right is like now that I'm fucking trying to get older and I'm trying to meditate and be this like I sit there and I go well why is this guy whistling making me so angry right like angry okay like hey that's not cool don't do it but we're like the rest of my day when I see people later that day

I'm like do you know what just happened to me yeah and they think it's like oh my god what and I'm like the guy behind me was with you know yeah right and then now I'm the crazy guy because I think that guy's I get set off by little shit I you know I got really set off by like a week ago so I did these by the way I did four shows in Spanish last week in Texas stand-up shows and it was a blast it was honestly some of the best audiences I've ever performed in front of because they just they just like they were so appreciative you could just sense that they were appreciating the show which is like a really special thing a

lot of times show sometimes you go you go to a show and it's like the show is like well let's see what you got you know and there wasn't like that feeling the feeling was like fuck yeah which can happen in English too I feel like it's more regular or normal when you travel abroad it's almost like they're like you're fucking you came all this way like right they don't say it to you but you sense it the Spanish language shows had that feel every time where they were like fuck yes dude like let's let's see this and the crowds were amazing they were so like they were amazing I feel really really fortunate I had Richard

Villa and Christina Sanchez on all the shows really great comics and they open the shows up but I'll tell you something that really sets me the fuck off and it I guess I think I say it people will be like why are you upset I don't know I don't know why I'm this upset but it's that when you do shows like this you get in advance meaning it's like a document that says like here's your hotel here's what time the show is here's the address like all the information pertinent to doing a show right and a lot of times the like if you pull up to a venue you've never been to before you're like where like the

venues have parking for the artists entrance but so I'm like I pull up to a venue I haven't been to and I go I pull up the advance and it says like here's your contact right person's name and phone number so I call and they they don't answer so I'm like all right I'll give them a second call them back they don't answer I text them no answer I text them a second time no answer I'm starting to get like irritated by this so then I I'm like all right I'll call the actual number of the venue you know I mean so now I'm like all right my contact isn't answering I'll call the I'll call the venue so I call the venue

the venues like if you'd like to talk to somebody press like for I press for and it goes no one's available right and I'm like god damn it I start to get like heated about it like I'm like what the fuck finally I get a call from a different number and then the guy goes hey so-and-so said you were calling I'm like yeah and they go yeah they're on the phone they're on the phone right now and I was like oh okay I go well I'm here I don't know where to go or anything he's like oh it's just like pull like he gives me directions where to park and I'm already just like I'm fucking fired up you know I'm like so I park and then

the person who I was calling goes yes sorry I was on the phone and I was like right but you know it's showtime right like we have a show right now and I've never been here and I'm like you know I'm calling you who's on the phone with Chappelle yeah I was like and I go who who are you talking to I didn't ask if they they volunteered it they go well I was talking to one of the the club owners and I go but wouldn't the owner want you to run this show and they're like yeah I should have told them that I had to go that's what they said I should have told them I had to go and I was like yeah all right I did it it took me

like 20 minutes to not be fucking irritated by it and I didn't want I don't want to be of course I want to be like those people who are like that's no big deal man like you know you you know people who are like let it go oh yeah I don't have I don't have it I don't have it and I and I and then people get critical of you for being upset they'll be like just fucking calm down you're like yeah that doesn't work like you saying that doesn't help me I don't feel like when you told me that I shouldn't be upset but now I'm not upset I think 20 minutes is actually a very short time yeah it's not that long to be because I

think you're I think you're still upset no it's because I'm reliving it no I know I know I would still that would yeah like that's here's how here's how much I when the show was over I sat the person down and I go hey I was really upset I just want you to know that I'm not upset anymore and they're like they're like I'm really sorry that I didn't answer I was like oh you didn't answer or text or anything like that I go it's okay right like I'm not mad anymore but if you do it again I'll rip your fucking eyes out that kind of shit yeah yeah I like it yeah yeah I mean but like I don't know what to do to not be like this when

people don't it is it's just a thing that I don't think ever goes away maybe when when people don't have common sense or common like decent courtesy etiquette basic yeah it's like it feels like you're going out of your way to make me angry yeah like and not even to make me angry but just like do whatever you're doing that is making me like like think if you think about clicking over to somebody and going hey here's where you park or like getting another human letting them know hey Tom's calling me here's Tom's number call him and say this when you could have just like that that's what have I get in my head about how

fucking stupid people and yeah that that gets and that's the thing it's like sometimes you know especially corona and shit but it's like sometimes I'll be like I'm having such a great day and then I interact with the first person yeah and it goes away and I'm like this is why I stay inside yeah like I don't understand how this is so but then I had friends back in the day growing up in New York who were like I remember I had a friend one time who buzzed me from the lobby that he was coming up and he came up 15 minutes later and I was like where where were you for 15 minutes I got in a fight with your doorman I was like how

the interaction is like hey Rob apartment thanks yeah then then you you will get in the elevator like in what yeah how do you get into a fucking fight but my friends you know some people were just yes some people so I don't feel like I look for that shit you know but I I do I feel disrespected by a lack of like courtesy and decency like it really bothers me a lot you know yeah and it doesn't have to be like oh you didn't hold the door like that's fine yeah it's more like hey was it would be like if I was walking through the door and you closed it on me like that it's like it was easier for you to just do this or

time when people disrespect your time yeah you know like someone's like we'll meet at two and you're like it is 2 30 and you have like what's going and they're like oh yeah and you're like you didn't think that I would want to know that you're gonna show up 40 minutes late or something what the fuck are you what's wrong with you you know well we talked about this when you did my podcast but I feel like when you I was addicted to Percocets for a long time and just like opiates whatever and you you develop a real thick skin for people disrespecting your time oh really yeah because they are just there's no like I

had a guy who said like um you know hey I'll I'll be there in an hour and you're like okay great because like tomorrow right exactly yeah and you're like well that's great that you'll be here in an hour because tomorrow if I don't get these I'll be sick yeah so thanks thanks for coming in an hour and then two hours goes by and you call him and then it's three hours for us and then it's like that night and I had one guy who was so crazy that he'd be like oh I'm right downstairs like I'm sorry like I'll be right there 20 minutes later I call me because I'm walking your lobby right now 20 minutes later call me like I'm

getting in the elevator like right I swear there were times where I called him he'd be like I'm in the hallway and I'd open my door and I'd be like I'm in the hallway yeah you're not in the hole and then like I call 20 minutes later and then he just doesn't answer for like 12 hours but what they what they don't want you to go get from someone else so that's why they tell you the lie yeah and he's oh I'm right but then like there were times where I became friends with these people because I was seeing them so much because I was taking so many pergocets that then I'd be with them and they'd be sitting with me like

smoking a blunt on my couch and they pick up their phone and be like yeah I'm in the elevator and I'm like you scum you scumbag yeah but I kind of but part of me kind of felt good you know I'm like oh I'm seeing behind the curtain and like what's going on but then the next time when he was doing it to me I'm like dude I know you're not yeah I know you're fucking with me right now they don't care at all no of course no no just like bike guy he didn't give a fuck when he was no he was definitely on drugs so yeah and just like when somebody would come meet me and hand me 400 pergocets I wouldn't care anymore either you know

like it was like cool oh yeah like how's your day you know and it was like oh you just lied to me for you know 24 hours by the way you know what gives you a perspective on getting upset about things having toddlers because I have two boys and they're two and a half and five and like I see them lose their shit things right yeah and I from the adults like more mature perspective I'll be like buddy like you don't be don't don't be so upset he's like like my five-year-old fell like off the back of his tricycle and he and he actually fell in the concrete and he goes this is why I hate concrete I like grass and I was like

yeah right he's like why don't we have more grass and I go it's a good call we're gonna get some crap he was walking around just fuming and I was like dude you gotta I go just let's take a breath like so so upset and by the way the the tactic when they when they tell you ways to calm down number one is breathe like take a breath yeah that's what I'm always trying to tell him and then admit this is here number two is admit that you're anxious or angry okay I'll do that challenge your thoughts that actually helps when you're like is this like worth being upset about you know should I be upset about like should I

be this upset that's what I was asking myself the other day I swear to you in this green room I'm like is this worth being this upset about right I don't do that enough yeah what I just got irritated release the anxiety or anger how just jerk off what what I think about a lot is like I was angry about something this week last year yeah and I don't know what it was so why am I letting this get to me when a year from now I'm not gonna know about I'm not gonna remember this day yeah being angry and so it's just like I could let it go now or I could let it go in three hours or three months but a lot of times

doesn't work yeah it's true visualize your calm that's a good one think it through just be like I'm gonna go to prison yeah by the way it's like number like we should have just had the guy who got the door kicked in right this fucking article keep taking a shit yeah it's like what it's just like oh it's all good yeah he's got the right perspective man oh my god music that could help that can help yeah change your focus that's not so easy though you know some of these like change your focus and relax your body are on here that's not easy when you're that fired up though you know walk out of the room it says but what if you're

shitting yeah what if you're taking a shit pick the door on you and your knee split open yeah how do I leave the room and relax ooh write it down relax your body he was trying you know down is a good one get some fresh air yeah fuel your body with what anger drop your shoulders yeah that's true that's all right cuz you fucking that's true have a centering object hmm okay identifying pressure points to calm anger and anxiety yeah it's right between my legs right Christina yeah never seen her this shy before I gotta say it's quite a turn on there I think you know what I think

like so obviously she was talking about wanting to fuck those Cobra Kai like the dudes on Cobra Kai and like HBO just put out Godzilla vs. King Kong like they had the two juggernauts go out and I think Netflix needs to do like Tom Segura vs. Cobra Kai yeah and I think you just go in there and fuck them up fuck them all up yeah I don't know how many more months you need to fully recover but then I go like now who do you want to fuck yeah right you just pop on the screen in an episode you don't tell her you're doing it you just start kicking teenagers in the face are they still hot still turned on by them yeah they're

all paralyzed now yeah who's hawk now yeah gotta let her know rip that kid's fucking neck and a half and piece of shit do fucking taekwondo with your toes from now on you're breathing tube oh yeah this is by the way you like the noise hawk makes when he breathes Christina the turn you on yeah that's right so normally when we play something on the live show it's just for the live show but one clip it's not an outrageously it's not like a graphic clip but it's so it's so made me laugh like just like everything about it and so I'm I'm brought it on I'm gonna play it here so for those of you that didn't

see the live show this is a clip that we played on it and I just I'll tell you why I love it a moment here's here's the clip okay so basically I got nutted in the other night and in one hand she has a plan B and in the other hand she has a prenatal vitamin and we're gonna rush and roulette and see I'm just gonna take one and then see you know what happens in a month glass of wine I love everything this is why you love chicks with tattoos first of all I'm in love yeah okay so first of all she's cute AF right she is casually begins with basically I got nutted in the bed do you think there's anyone who's

mentally stable enough watching this show right now who's not turned on by her no no like a guy who's like oh no but that's so unattractive that she's this crazy or this because I'm not no you're in right oh man oh so I look like she's what is it FGTRT yeah for girls that ride till death yeah she I'll tell you right now she's not fucking around now she's so she's super hot and and I love that the way that she I love when women especially it's like men we always have like casual conversations about sex and sometimes like you talk to women and you have to you have to gauge whether or not they're okay with that but something

about a woman who cat like talks about it in other words like like it's not there's no stigma attached not so serious it's a track it's appealing it's fun it's fun to talk about right yeah she has that so she's attractive she talks about it this way and with her friend and the the casual nature of will I abort or keep this child like like we're talking about are we gonna get hammer turkey for lunch today we're just gonna see what happens I guess we in Turkey and then and the fact that her friend got her to take the prenatal item yeah the whole thing to me it's like it's she's sexy it's funny it's

super entertaining well these two ended up watching the live show I was just gonna say wow man so anyways I think she's great I think she she would be quoted at like you know how they have quotes for shows afterwards like you know this person saw it and said this like she would see why I'm a slide and be like yeah what is that a show for pussies like you know cuz she's a fucking she's a savage she's she's like gangster she's totally gangster by the way I I've seen your eyes light up I mean I'm kind of yeah I'm really I'm kind of distracted from this whole yeah because she's so hot I want to make a love

connection yeah oh no listen if I was if I was 22 yeah I would already I'd be on my phone already 24 just fucking give her a call yeah I can't if I have that in my life I'll be back to do and I'll be back to waiting for my drug dealer for 72 hours in my apartment with her like I listen I yeah we couldn't be we'd be playing Russian roulette all my god she yeah cuz she is fucking she's the type you know she's great yeah she's she is trouble yeah so speaking of trouble fun trouble good trouble you're are you out there dating yeah so for the past couple years like corona obviously slam dunk but like I wasn't dating at all and then

two weeks ago so I went to San Diego my buddy custom who I do my podcast with was the first time that I left LA since corona started and as soon as you got there it was like oh life's going on here yeah like this is real so he was on the dating app and he's like yo you could we start talking I'm like you know what I'm gonna get on and I didn't expect anything and it was like you know maybe two weeks ago or so and I've I'm going on my third day tomorrow nice yeah through and three different girls oh this is your third different date yeah yeah yeah how have the first two been you know yeah I like you know I don't want

to come on here and no I understand yeah like I'll talk shit about people who put themselves out there yeah but they were they weren't really putting themselves out there but they listen they were it just wasn't a love connection I mean look that's what dating is you see where you see when you click yeah you know I remember going on dates and it's like there is that thing sometimes I feel like you almost want to be able to like I wish sometimes you could go I know it's only been like 10 minutes do you want to just leave so that's dating on the spectrum yeah that's what they are you spectrum is like you're like hey I'm

gonna fart and leave yeah because that's what's up like I and nobody has a problem with it like it's like we're but yeah you know you definitely feel but you know what I also like pre-corona I felt that way way more we're like as soon as I knew there wasn't a connection I I'd wanted to end we're now I'm like I don't really mind talking this person for 45 minutes yeah it's not that bad because you've had so little social interaction over the last year or you know however long it's been so it's like but man before corona I just I couldn't do it like as soon as we said as soon as somebody like whistled or did

the fucking anything that I didn't have time for the oh when when people do that it drives me fucking in it's what does it bother you so much I don't know we'd have to talk for a long time we have to get Dr. Drew in here but I think it's like it just seems so fake yeah to me and it's so like like somebody who like and it's somebody you know like if you like I don't know I think you like you give someone a hug if you look like like I'm staying away from you and like making these hands but like I think it's usually celebrities who do it who don't want to touch yeah people so they go hey I'm letting you know I'm I love you do

they do that in person to people oh yeah yeah like it's a fucking weird it's so it's just so like yeah it's just gross okay that one really bothers me yeah well that's what and then they put it that one over the chest like what's a Heidi Klum on like America's Got Talent like puts it over her chest and like and pushes it out at the person and like back to her chest I'm like what what is it like I just I don't you know point of personal privilege oh boy fucking pisses me off I saw that um was it Paulina Poroskova she was the one that was married to Rick what's his name he died I think he died and he left her out of

yeah yeah Rick okay Rick okay sick sounds like a cool guy left her out of the will he left her out of the will sounds like a cool guy and she is like I want to say penniless or something like I just saw some blurb about her that it's like she's in a really bad place right now but I think he left her out of the will for for a reason though she's in a really bad place now she was fine when he died yeah yeah when she found out she wasn't in the will she was it seeks part of late cars frontman estate then makes money joke what is it saying yeah she was she's just trying to get she's just trying to get back into the will

after the death it looks like okay cool cool lady but the reason is there isn't there it was revealed in November before his death that he wrote a well instructing that she should not receive any of his belongings or money as he claimed the model had abandoned him amid their divorce proceedings oh okay yeah that's what it was so I think he um he because he was older than her older and getting sick and I guess she she ditched him so he he changed the will because they were together for a long ass time man he's got to be what he had to have been 20 plus years older than her something like that nice move Rick

I gotta say I gotta say I dig I dig cutting her out on your way out that's pretty funny yeah just watch your fucking mouth uh huh look how look how easy this is Christina yeah so just and when I say watch your mouth I mean keep it exactly as it is right now okay you don't want to end up like Paulina right that's right mm-hmm mm-hmm I gotta say I think it's really irresponsible of Nadav that like he has a platform and he's not using it we're like I think he he says that when he googles that his fingers are too fat and they touch all

the other keys yeah which makes us wonder like our keyboards inclusive enough that's true because maybe they're just for thin fingers and that's not cool and he has a platform as a as a half Latinx I can tell you that it bothers me yeah it bothers me that it's not an inclusive enough keyboard so we should change keyboards yeah I think and make them inclusive for everyone by the way I have a lot of people that hit me up uh yes wondering how you you felt about how's your fat no yeah it's you know working here you develop calluses in really weird places yeah and that's one that's that I was one that was just like yeah that's just a normal sentence yeah there's there's times where I talk to people where I say something crazy and

I'm like oh I forget that I'm not at work right because there are certain things you could really only say here and then everywhere else it's socially unacceptable yeah that's true well that's what that's what I didn't remember about dating which I think when I was dating when I was younger there was only like one note I had we're like now that I'm older and I'm seeing different things and trying to be a you know a better person it's like you realize it's not only do I want to be with this person but it's like do I want to be this person more often because in some of the girls we talk to it's like very sexual some of them it's like oh we're having deep conversations some of them it's like oh we're just laughing the whole time yeah so you kind of

have to decide like what do what do I want like yeah this chick is hot and she seems cool and this but do I want to be like if we don't have that if we're only having deep conversations is that the way to go because it's like I have my friends to laugh with so maybe I want to lean more towards the deep conversations or this we're like when I was 22 it was just like yeah you know yeah yeah uh-huh I gotta say I still enjoy this aspect of you a lot I don't people who are listening think you're talking to me um the uh have you been following at all our big-titted animal challenge oh come on I I feel like come on I feel like I should fucking FaceTime Jamie Lynn right now and hit her with a and record it

and hit her with a big-titted animal we should definitely do that we should do it we have a few more uh that we're sent in would you like to see and you talked about you'd have to do a whole show like this I could get on board I I fucking love it I love the big-titted animal big-titted animal really makes me laugh yeah I love I love that big-titted animal challenge has um like different notes you know like there's the people who are like the girls who are like hey and then the ones who are like what the fuck did you just call yeah and then there's the ones that laugh like there's there's really like different ways it can be received so I haven't seen this yet or these yet this is from uh Ryan and Jess happy Easter you big-titted animal

get in the kitchen and eat some breakfast there's a lot of love in that house yeah the the children involved is another note we didn't bring it yeah that's one we really haven't seen much of right and those are children that can understand what you're saying fully yeah and they didn't even and they didn't even flinch so they understand it all a lot around they understand that dad does this kind of thing a lot yeah this is a Carson I'm sorry I laughed that's okay because she's in a hospital bed yeah he said are you ready to pop that baby out you big-titted animal that that was the best what she went like what do you think the girl with the plan B roulette

would do if a guy said this to her I think she's cutting them you know it depends on her mood I think she could I think there's a certain guy in a certain mood she's in where she laughed fuck did you call me like she laughs and plays there's a certain mood she's in like if she were in this bed I don't know man I don't think oh no something's popping up on the citizen right away I think you just pop it out she'd pop that baby out and then fuck you up yeah that fucking she'd wrap that umbilical cord on your neck she's so dangerous I love it um here's Jerry doing all right you big-titted animal you're doing all right you big-titted animal what I said if you're doing all right you big-titted animal

you you're big-titted animal I don't think we've seen anything like this yet it's a very fun new lane it's a fun new lane doing it to your guy friend who speaks English as a second language yeah you got to do it to definitely he would just roll off his back he would he would even register here is uh I guess this is from Troy oh it's a wingstop order it says okay oh oh he's oh he's texting it hey big order from wingstop is being delivered that's very funny oh so his name on the app is big titted animal that's great that's very funny and this is oh and there it is it arrived big titted animal somebody hand wrote it on the bag that's very funny it's a good move that is very

funny bta bta is a good one oh my god jesus christ so dates for you you're gonna go on more dates uh hopefully and if this I hope you gave me a peek at what's out there on the phone oh yeah there are some and like my favorite ones are the people who and much like you guys talk about on tiktok is like don't understand what the app is for yeah like one girl was like i'm looking for a lease with options to buy and it's a picture of someone who's never made a joke ever no like she's not kidding around and trying to be funny like she's very serious and then there's my favorite one is like there's a photo of a girl who again you could tell she's just not a funny person and it's there like the most boring picture you've ever seen and above it the caption because you could

pick captions and then you fill in the the photo right because people made the captions they'd get crazy so the caption was you had to be there and it's her looking like she's on like death row you know what i mean and you're just like no like thank god i wasn't and i'm not yep there yeah you don't want to be there and there's just you you can't believe that some people can put a photo as their profile picture that puts out the so not a sexual vibe the least flattering photo you showed me a slew of photos that like you have to go even like when you go like this person is not subjectively attractive to me you go they could put a better photo up yeah or just not the worst one that like yeah like there was one that we saw where it's from the bottom of somebody who's

sitting on an airplane with like the overhead bins open so it's like during takeoff so it's like hey bunch of shit's going on okay like hey everybody put your fucking you know please turn your devices off and she's like oh no wait first i gotta get my dating app profile picture before i put this away yeah and like takes that picture and but like what are you thinking what are you thinking it's it's and it's it's like the fucking person whistling like we need to know what they're thinking this is what i look like right and like i could just go take a picture with my phone down here and be like hey and then post that picture from underneath and and with my eyes half closed and be like well there's my dating app photo and i think people would be

like hey man um that's probably not the best photo of you you could take right right like like i think a friend would be like hey let me help you out let me let me hold the camera for you yeah maybe stand up i don't know hey it's 2021 how about the other 300 pictures you have of yourself yeah i mean your phone like it's there's one you showed me where someone's on just on a plane and they're like yeah it's the craziest that that one sticks with me more than anything and it's like the simplest what are it for it for somebody on an app like when you're when you're what's a deal breaker what are the deal breakers if i could tell you're stupid just from your photo yeah you're fucking you just broke a deal yeah yeah that's true i can't like you it's like how don't

like what are you do there's like when when the the caption doesn't match the photo like i remember one caption was like again you pick them so they picked like the caption said i can teach you this and it was just someone standing there i can teach you this yeah and it's like what but instantly i'm like you're just you're on another planet you know is there a direct correlation okay i'm gonna be real careful with the way i word this uh huh is there a direct correlation between notable stupidity that immediately registers and level of unattractiveness well i think it's i think it's when they're really hot i don't notice it there you go yeah i think it's me i don't i think it's how dumb i am once i'm like oh you're really hot and then you say

something don't i just got nutted and put there you'd be like this is cool right yeah super hot chick and it's like my favorite thing to do on a saturday it's like play plan b roulette you're like hey that's you're fun yeah like oh i like your style i like you a lot yeah you seem really cool but yeah no you could definitely tell there's some and then also just like the activities they're doing in the photos like sometimes it's like someone just like waiting for a bus and that's a crazy thing that that just shows you that someone's out of their mind if they're like oh it's just a bus stop photo like that's what i'll use for a dating profile what yeah you think that's uh an appealing i understand you have to wait for the bus you shouldn't put it in your

dating profile yeah i saw a girl who was like had her like grandma who looked like she was dying in a hospital bed with like her arm around her and her head next to her head and it's like listen i get i get like you just said your grandma's dying horrible thing this is like we're we're basically looking at here deciding like do we want to fuck like or or at least that's the or potential do i want to have a kind and it's like oh like so you're going through girls and you're like oh they're like it's like you're like oh cleavage oh this oh like a girl wearing a short skirt and then you're like oh you're you and your grandma in like i like the intensive care like what like it just it makes sure it rattles your brain sometimes do these like do they ever

have they implied at all they know who you are at all uh so i never bring it up but uh some girls have but luckily like you know if a girl is 30 now she was um eight years old when soprano started or when when the fuck did soprano start i don't even know yeah 22 years ago so like there's an in general like even when i was dating when sopranos was on and like the biggest show there was it's like i girls who were my age never knew who i was right which was which was actually great for me because like my character on the show was like a pussy and like a really annoying but all that like they would hear is like oh yeah he's on like the biggest show on tv yeah so it was like oh yeah they don't know that um like a fucking you know like a cry baby and like yeah like you just know

like i'm on soprano like they think even more like oh shit he's on the show about the mafia like oh yeah this guy is fucking cool yeah that's like no i'm the guy who's like the douche you know it's strange like do you like do you ever like forget that somebody might put you in like you know i mean like i i forget that like i'll meet people and then they'll be like oh i didn't think you'd be cool and you're like why and they're like i mean like i didn't think that you'd be this cool and you're like about what what are you talking about and they're like oh because i thought you'd be like more uh aloof or something you know i mean like they'll have their and then you you kind of go like oh i thought we were just like having lunch here all together or something

you know like i would be like you know jamie lin who played my sister on the show is one of my best friends in the world and uh that big titted animal yeah that bta so she we would go out to dinner like back in the day and there would be times where like i would look over and be like what the fuck is this guy looking like because i'd be drinking too you know and like and all of a sudden like a fucking table is staring over and i'm like what the fuck are these guys like staring and then like somebody would have to be like oh yeah like you guys are the biggest tv show in the world but it just it was never like who i was like i i never like even when so sopranos ended 14 years ago and i told my manager like hey give me like six months off

and that was 14 years ago like i just don't it's i don't feed off of like i don't know whatever fame and fame yeah this and then like i just i actually kind of don't really love it like this is the okay so you know a couple weeks ago i guess i could say who it was but i got a phone call like i haven't auditioned for anything in a really long time i got a phone call for my manager and he's a case somebody wants you to put you on tape and i get a lot of stuff like that but it's usually not great shit and he's like but it's jordan peel this jordan peel project like coming up and i was like that's one night audition yeah how do i i'm like what's a tape like how do i how do i do this like i love what i use my phone like what so uh i did it but it's even

like something like that when like the day's leading up to it or doing it like i'm not comfortable where like here is the first thing that like has anything to do with show business in years where like you hit me up or christina hits me up and is like hey do you want to do this thing and it's like fuck yeah like yeah yeah i feel comfortable we have fun it's dope i don't feel that like um you know i almost like when it's acting i almost go into like a manic state of like i don't want to do this should i do this no it's okay and like the fucking voices in my head it's like shut up that but those are normal voice i think i mean auditioning is so horrible i've auditioned so i really get you know the way you usually find out about an audition or that somebody

wants you to audition it's first through an email so you know i'll get an email from agents that say per your consideration this is this thing that we you know they'd like you to submit for and all the times i'll read it and i'll be like pass no thanks sometimes if they if whoever's making it really wants you then your agent will follow up with a phone call tell you they really want you and then at least give it a second look i'll be like alright let me see what this is and then sometimes i'll be like yeah this is still some bullshit i don't want to do and then if it's like oh my god appealing like if that if they were like jordan peel asked i'd be like yeah yeah man give me a couple days to prep prepare for this because i'd want to to to do

something with them like i i just auditioned for something uh when i because i read it and i was like this is like it's great material i read it and i was like this is a really good material yeah i want to be a part of it but most of the time it's a horrible it's a horrible process the worst part of the auditioning process i don't know if you like you found this as you go especially if you go this this seems awesome you submit and they're like this is great like your your tape is great you're like all right cool and then you're just like just days go by and you're like did they look at it and they're like what you're like the thing that you asked me to do and they're like oh yeah yeah we have a call into them i'm like oh okay and then you just you just don't hear

you know it's like when you pitch shows if the pitch goes really well you hear back right and then if you can think it went well and you're like so what happened with whatever you know production company or or streaming service and they're like oh i i don't know we haven't heard from them you're like oh that's it so it just it just plays it's almost like going on a date where you're like i thought that went really well right yeah see that that doesn't bother me the thing that bothers me is like i never took acting class like i'm not a fucking great actor i guess you are but oh thanks but i'm not but i learned to act on sopranos like in the fucking scene and doing it and like from these people who are the best and everything so then when i go to do an

audition it's not that it's not like you would think that an audition in my living room that like three people are gonna see would be more nerve-wracking than being here because like so many more people are gonna see it it's on the floor like there's there's so many more things why you would think that but it's just there's something about like being uncomfortable there's something about the audition that's crazy it's really hard it's nerve-wracking it is i remember also doing one the one one of the ones i did recently where you know i was happy with most of it like the the scene then i'd be like hi man i didn't like what my right hand did yeah you know like i want to go oh let's do it again and then like i i feel better about my hand but i'm like yeah but i don't think i

performed as well let's do it again you start playing that game of like hey man this is take 16 are we about gonna wrap this up you're like i don't know because it keeps fucking with your head yeah it's it's and that's the thing like i would be i wouldn't be nervous if they were like you got the movie show up on set tomorrow you're working in this i'd be like okay like i'm i'm cool you maybe a little bit of jitters or whatever like the audition like for nights before i'm like like you get in your fucking head about when like and the crazy thing is is like you know it'd be great to get the job but i don't even care if i get the job so what's i don't understand why yeah yeah so i know i go through this with pitching too everything comes together on a pitch sometimes

and then you're like do i want to make this yeah you know like they'll get you'll get the call they're like hey they want to make the show and you're like yeah but you gotta tell them that i changed my mind and they're like what yeah you're like yeah well i mean like i don't know do i like do i want that because i kind of really enjoy what i'm doing now right so because in entertainment like everything has kind of shifted people don't realize that like this is entertainment and we get to control it and it's it's fun to do it the way we want to do it and then you're like no i want to go you know that's why the thing that makes you kind of think about um auditioning usually is like if the material is so great like like when you know that jordan's making something

you're like this is going to be awesome yeah in that case it's like the exception you're like i want to make want to make something amazing you know well the thing that's great about like you know when we do our podcast when i leave our you know we have brice and gaby people with george who do tiger belly they do our stuff and it's like i know it's in good hands we're we're good we're like when you do another thing especially like when people do reality shows it's like you could be totally normal for two weeks and they can make you look like a piece of shit you know or like when you do a movie and you're like man they they you know i don't usually watch the stuff i do but the stuff in the it's like oh they use that like oh my god that was so bad and this we're like

when you do your own thing like this and you say like this is entertainment now it's like you don't have to worry about it once you're done doing it yeah it's over it's over like hey if i see something i don't like boom we take it out we do like that that that's a weird kind of aspect to it it totally is by the way for back to your dating some people do this thing where they just are direct with who they like and i think it's something you should consider too like this dude here hey you rockin azalea my sexy angel um just wanted to see how you were doing i just wanted to tell you how of you and i want to get married to you one day um peace out babe yeah that was a message i don't know if you could hear it clearly to iggy azalea

oh okay i didn't know who it was too but i heard the message yeah the message is he thinks she's super sexy and and uh he wants to marry her so might as well just put it out there and i think chicks i think if she sees this he's in luck because he's wearing a shirt a shirt with not only like her face on it a little bit but it's like the whole the whole yep shirt i feel like i've got to be maybe only three or four degrees separated from like i bet i can talk to somebody that knows somebody that knows her and maybe we could help like make a love connection i don't know for sure yeah she's single me and the plan b girl could double date with iggy dude and this guy yeah yeah this fucking i don't know though might my chick might leave me for this guy he's a handsome handsome

cool devil oh shit he's not he she's not even single even going strong since 2018 with playboy yeah this guy's got his work cut out from i mean but he's a musician you could see in the back he's got the uh his guitar yeah oh yeah he could probably play that riff yeah yeah he probably could say i don't know she might we we should bring it to her we don't want to have it on our minds that like they were meant to be and we didn't let it happen that's true so i think we should we should try and do everything we can to get together jesus um by the way speaking of the uh the live shows one thing that we've loved is seeing people's heavy reactions you know yeah videos of it so we have a few here that were sent

in this is um if you if you've never seen the live shows they the ymh lives end with a heavy segment where we play the heaviest videos we can find and we encourage people to record themselves as they watch it so here is one i haven't seen these yet but that's what it says here in the folder this is uh venessa oh please i grew a puke there's a man eating his shit man yeah that was a gross one oh that was i really thought she was gonna throw up on herself and i was really excited about it when you got the red nose and the red eyes there's ty oh that's in a bucket

can you imagine imagine the pink eye look at the dog that lady legit threw up wow wow that's amazing that is a supportive dude there willard and wood here oh my god oh already i know where no no no i know no no no no are you kidding me i can't no no no this is why oh oh no oh my oh my oh my Jesus Christ why is this happening where am i

oh my god this is why i'm so excited about the west palm beach show because it's just gonna be a room full of people doing this and we're gonna have cameras on them so i'm i'm so excited you're gonna do some heavy stuff oh yeah oh wow yeah and there's like there's a notice when you buy the tickets that like that you're this is your fault if you come in here well yeah you you guys i was lucky enough where you guys had me uh to to a ymh live and i watched outside the whole uh first half with josh potter the great josh potter and this was me and him we were just fucking you know it was i remember there was like um i'm like can i even say this but there was like a a woman who like tied up her tit and then had like a praying mantis eating her

nipple and i was like i'm it fucked me up yeah it fucked me up we're changing people's lives man yeah you really are and it's just shout out to dar man yeah if you want to see the one with uh rob it's at ymh studios dot com speaking of and this also ties into the uh the great jeremy fish who did those designs for us um we're always being surprised with with the youtube's version of tupac a fed smoker and the videos they can they just they just pop in here and everyone is a rush it's just like it's a rush i feel like i just did a bump where i'm like man yeah i get so excited here he is at a mechanic shop being as you might imagine not totally cool

look at his tire tire that's been used my friend Jesus it's a hundred miles an hour to his other dear kids let's swap give it up for our man these guys always take care of me thank you so there you're like wait you he is being cool though that it started like that and obviously i i'm imagining that they're like you must be out of your fucking mind driving on this right and they're clearly replacing his tire and then you know the work's done and then here's fed smoker you're gonna do steal my ram or something buddy oh you're gonna try to steal my ram or you know i just handed in over here and you can bring it in just toss it in if you what you doing trying to steal my ram brother

thinking let someone know if you've got the rim or not my god oh my god use your mind how'd you let me drive off without my rim there buddy you you do that on purpose yeah you should have let me know buddy you some kind of joke or something dude get the fuck out of here yeah take it easy there hot rod whoa baby ravers can't hurt you fuck you see you there thief whoa he was kind of the first guy who put fed smoker in his place a little bit and that was smoker kind of one of the first times i've seen that yeah that's by the way that is exactly how to handle fed smoker there's a lot to unpack in this in this video right here first of all

i mean we've all seen wheelchair things hanging from people's fucking mirrors forever yeah have you ever seen a red one not one not one his it's only blue it's it's temporary oh okay yeah and then the other thing so he has a laptop in there that shows four different cameras yeah he has four cameras in his car showing the outsides of his car yeah yo that is i know it's like do you have you have security cameras fed smoker for the fed mobile people trying to steer us his room bud oh man huh he's like a pirate yeah yeah see you there thief so here's here's what i might what i want to say about fed smoker is like i think people who are not and i'm not i'm just gonna say because i'm from new york city when you're from new york city it's like i think people from other

places would be like oh my god if i saw this guy around my children like it would be a real problem yeah but if you're from new york city like you're around people like this just all the time all the time and it's by the time i was 12 i had a friend who was like this there was a guy named sarge who chilled in the park and he would tell us like war stories of him like killing people and all this shit and then we realized like oh we could pay this guy to get us beer yeah so we'd give him money to get us like 40s of oldie yeah he'd go to the fucking store and get us and then he'd sit with us and we'd get him a fucking beer and he would sit with us and tell us stories but he was like this guy and he was sarge because he'd be like you call me sorry you know he was all about he's

still there the thing about new york city though is there's something about when you're in new york city that you sense and you feel and you learn to coexist with these types of people the difference is that part of that is that in new york city you are with people everywhere you know i mean like a lot of cities like los angeles is a big city example but there's a lot of small city examples where you don't have to coexist with other people yeah in your car you go to a place you go inside the place you get in your car you you know i mean like you're not co-existing new york hong kong london paris like those types of like the those like iconic cities that you don't have to have a car in to get around your shoulder to shoulder with the full spectrum of humanity

and that lets like that has you it like trains you to go like this guy's out of his fucking mind but he's also a fellow new yorker yeah and like i you know whatever i'll ask him to buy me beer or whatever and like it trains you to kind of see it as another person if you're in fucking Omaha and this car pulls up you're like uh uh like yeah there's no way i'm talking to this fucking guy in new york like you're getting in an elevator with this guy with your children yeah yeah that's just how it is yeah like a kind of joke or something yeah yeah yeah i fucking easy fuckhead so he's so good man oh god and the and they just keep coming you know they just every other we got come in here and they're like oh we have uh more fed smoker videos like how is there no end

to this yeah there's no end to it drugs they're like that drugs and his 16 youtube accounts yeah yeah which drugs yeah what is oh yeah because we were talking about what is like your biggest molly binge so i did uh you know like i i told this story on uh joey Diaz and like i want to thank you obviously but like you know you guys barstool sports and joey Diaz is like responsible for all the fans of our podcast no you have a great pot i had the best time on your podcast for every for people that don't know if you're watching this i did recently an episode of pajama pants it was really good time thanks man yeah christina p's done it she's done it yeah uh you know yeah so just thanks so much but on joey Diaz i told this story so like it's been over eight years since i've

had a drink or done molly or whatever but basically when i was i started drinking and partying and i was like 12 and then by the time i was 22 i was doing so much coke that i was like i need to stop drinking because like when i would drink i'd always think i'm not doing coke and then you get drunk and you're like all right where's the coke you know like i'll yeah so i stopped doing coke i stopped drinking at 22 to be like i'm not doing coke anymore so i stopped drinking for nine months and when i started drinking again i was like okay i'm gonna drink again if i ever do coke again i'm never having another drink like that's it i'm done and so then like a couple months later i found molly and i was like well this isn't coke yeah so yeah so i just started fucking doing molly

like non-stop and you know i was i was partying so hard that i went to vegas for two weeks and i came back like 18 months later with just like a suit like i went to vegas for the suitcase and like 18 months later came back like huh like where wow yeah like i was all in so like you know that's a good that's a place to go all in too yeah and that's the thing it's like i left new york city like the city that doesn't sleep because i was like oh this isn't enough like you guys don't party and not enough you know like it's not yeah because i wasn't working i didn't have a job and i had been working since i was six years old doing acting and once i had time off from like surprise was done i was like fuck it let's party like when you can actually this is before you get to the

story when you're in that 18 month period in vegas do you get calls from like an accountant or business manager that's like hey man like you're just you're only spending so earning what happened was well it was like right after soprano so i was i was all right but what happened was um i went to vegas to play in the world series of poker and when i went for uh the two weeks i ended up getting so they have like the main event and there were i don't know i make it up 6 000 people or something but i remember i got like 275th place and that paid over 40 000 so i took that 40 000 and i put it into count and i was like yo i'm in my early 20s i'm single i'm just gonna get a place in vegas i'll pay the rent like from this fucking money and when it's

gone i'll leave like so it's like it never happened and yeah next thing i know it's like 18 months later i'm and i was dude i was doing so much molly like it how does it affect you because i only remember it's ecstasy yeah i know but i i i only did it like once or twice and it was over 20 years ago i just like it's more like i don't have the memory of the so like as someone who did it like full body yeah best you've ever felt everything's amazing you don't have any like bad thoughts in your head ever no negative thoughts you don't even understand why anybody would dude that's so great yeah right but then you know you get to the point where like you go on these like three day fucking benders and then you're waking up and you're like throwing up black for two days and like you can't

eat and you don't want to talk to anybody and you're just fucking super depressed and this so it's you know it's not all fun yeah but uh so the last time you know i start even like when i first started with drugs i would take a lot so even when i first started doing molly i was like you know three or five or whatever so cut to when i'm 28 so i'd probably been doing it for like a good five years and i and i did it before too when i was younger like ecstasy in this but i was really like it was a habit you know like a molly habit and um it's coming would coming off be really strong yeah that's when you're like really depressed yeah and and you know but i that's the thing right i wouldn't let myself come off while i was awake yeah so then you just wake up you know you sleep

for whatever eight to sixteen hours however long you could sleep for shit and then you wake up and you feel like shit you can't eat you hate you don't want to talk to anyone you don't want to see anyone like everything is just depressing so that's when i would take the percussettes because i'm like oh i i'm literally in pain yeah and i would just be like oh well i take these percussettes and then i feel better um but my so the last time i did molly or drank it was my 28th birthday and i was with a bunch of friends so i so what happened was i show up to my friends place and we're going to a concert and i take i'm like i'm going to take five molly so whatever it's friday at like six o'clock i take five molly now it's time to leave for the concert at whatever

time you know make it up but friday at 10 o'clock i take five more and i'm like i'm going to be fucking rolling my balls off for this concert like i want to be on the moon holy shit yeah so now what i do is i would always have a ginger ale bottle with me full of tequila so i take the ginger ale bottle with the tequila like you know not maybe like four shots of tequila or something maybe a little more and i i crack five molly in there and i'm like i could sip on this during the concert if it starts to go down like my my high starts to go down or if we're somewhere after whatever so you're just fucking beaming right now right oh i'm on them and it's my birthday so like my friends are there to see me and they walk in they're hugging you and they're like oh this is

your foot yeah you're you couldn't be like you know it's it's everything's amazing so we're walking to Madison Square Garden and we get to the front where like the security is and i could not be in a better place and i hear like and by the way like i'm not worried at all about people recognizing me because i look like a fucking i have like a scarf a sunglasses like i'm all like you know i'm mania and somebody goes uh some like security or like cop even was like hey and like to me and i was like and you're just your heart drops and i'm like oh fuck this is it like because you know you're thinking all crazy shit but in that split second i'm like oh it's all over like i'm busted or whatever and the guy goes you can't bring that in and he points at the ginger ale

with the fucking molly on it uh in it so i was like okay and i was so relieved that i just fucking shot it back so now i'm on 15 molly and i'm in Madison Square Garden and i'm thanking people for coming to my birthday like literally telling people like thank you for for being here for me and it's like my thing yeah it's a fucking concert about it so then yeah all all about living life 365 especially back in the day and i so then i ended up taking about 35 molly because i stayed up until um like that sunday or monday or whatever and you know it sounds like a lot but it's really not because it was only like one every like two hours to get myself back and i didn't take it like that like spaced out perfectly but it was like you know i would pop two chill for three hours then

pop one and then pop two and it was just kind of like keeping yourself yo that's a lot bro keeping yourself going yeah but like you know what's weird when i look back on that shit for me it's not even the molly that i'm like i smoked like eight packs of cigarettes really which to me makes me oh like oh like i would just when i'd be on molly i would just have six fingers like i was always fucking so and coke too it's like you're always smoking a cigarette and when i look back on that because the molly at least you go well here's the risk here's the reward yeah right where when i'm like i smoked eight packs of cigarette the nothing like yeah you get nothing like you know at the time it's fucking great or whatever but like i look back at the molly and i go you know i am i'm happy i

had those experiences and whenever where i look back on the cigarettes and i go man those those i would have friends who would party with me and not do the the same amount i had a couple friends who could but there were a couple friends were like who didn't smoke cigarettes their hangovers weren't even close to as bad as people who smoked cigarettes like cigarettes fuck fuck they fuck you up yeah i just remember when i smoked i smoked for i'm such a fucking moron i started smoking at 25 which i just i just think it's so dumb because everybody that i knew that smoked smoked from like like a teen you know and they're like that's how i got hooked i'm like oh i'm past that i'm gonna start now but i started because i was um i was a messenger here in la like a like when you

message packages and i was so depressed i was like i should start smoking to like deal with this and it was such it was such a fucking bummer and i and then i started smoking around stand up so i took the like what i started as you know doing this horrible job which it was horrible horrible the pay was so fucking like one time they paid me for like after like a week and it was like less than 200 i was like what the fuck is this guy goes easy on the language okay like it's what he told me when i go the fuck are you talking about man but so then i would smoke before and after sets i remember when i would go on the road and do it and then go home that open your suitcase and the stink like it with the smell of the suitcase was just like it would

just smell rotten and dirty but what i i had lunch yesterday with a friend and that didn't know my oding story so i i told the story and then it reminded me that i also i went hardcore like a few months before that and blacked out completely like lost time and everything and it was a big warning and i was like yeah so and i i did it going to a concert too i went to a clint black concert a country singer because the girl i was dating liked country and her family friends like yeah they like so we went down and i did ghp at this motherfucker's concert wow and they had that's what it's meant for i think they had hired a driver to drive us because we were even though we were teens like we were like junior senior there you know it was

like they they didn't want us driving to the concert and i think they knew they didn't think we were going to be doing fucking drugs they just were like they're going to have a beer or something you know so i remember that we're at this concert i'm like i don't even like country music like doing the the shots of it and i probably did mix it with was like always even the drug dealers would tell you like the people that you bought the drug cry because they wanted to keep selling you drugs they were like don't drink when you take this shit you know they like it was known to be like dangerous and possibly fatal and i still would be like yeah i can have a little bit and so i went to this concert i may have sneaked the ghp which is like you know why it's an issue

yeah there's two other times that i blacked out horribly so that was one time before i OD them saying one time was at the concert and what happened was when we got in the they said they had hired like somebody to drive us in like a sprinter van or something you know you know so i got in in it to go back and when i i just woke up and we were back and i remember the my girlfriend being like yo like you were out out that was weird and i was like how long has it been it had been like a couple hours you know and i completely like blacked and i hadn't drank a lot i had just combined the two yeah and then another time was bad another time i uh took a girl to a hotel and what'd you do bud and i was like hey

you're about 120 right and uh yeah because it was great it was it was great sexual drug yeah you know it was it was like a full like like you're describing molly i mean ghp was like that full body high and like when you would come your fucking eyeballs would come out of your asshole like it was just fucking insane like intense and we both did it and we both blacked out and uh lost like a few hours and i was like that was that was a risky one and that like we both were like what time is it what day is it like that was scary i could tell christie has never heard this story because she looks shocked she does that was yeah that and like i'm so at the time i'm so young and stupid that like these are

clear warning events where i'm like yeah just keep pushing it man you know keep trying you know what you know it's crazy about cigarettes so cigarettes yeah yeah no because listen i i know i'm all but i just i'm thinking about what we talked about earlier which is like when you're mad for 20 minutes oh yeah like cigarettes is one of those things where like yes dude dude you fucking smoke a cigarette it's all gone like you know somebody pissed me off i go outside i smoke a cigarette i come in it's like another dude yes and what happened so i when i was addicted to all this shit and fucking alcohol and everything i was able to get off everything on my own until i got to xanax and i was like i can't get off this on my own because i've been taking it every day

for years and i would only take it when i wasn't drinking like i never mixed it but i took it everything like i would basically wake up every day and decide in the first hour i woke up like okay do i start drinking or i start taking xanax like what's what's the move yeah and then i would take you know purgates xanax or whatever but so i went to go see this guy who's kind of like a dr drew you know a drug specialist kind of dude and we're talking and he's like well you know cigarettes um are like the hardest addiction to break because there there are five addictions in one so he's like you have the nicotine you're addicted to the oral fixation you're addicted to the blowing the smoke out like just seeing that smoke is the thing you become addicted to

i'm probably leaving out like the most obvious one i forget what the ritual of actually yes that's it yeah so like the habit of just having something to do with your hands so you're breaking all that at once but then what he said is it's actually a form of meditation like smoking cigarettes so he's like somebody pissed you off so what do you do you go outside and you do this breathing thing for five minutes and then you come back in so he's like you're not asking somebody to just stop the nicotine addiction they've been meditating 20 times a day yeah for you know years and all of a sudden thought of it like this yeah and they're just like oh now you have to stop that like you're and you don't even know what it is that's pulling you back to the cigarettes but it's

all that shit and and the other thing why cigarettes are the most hardest thing is because like i've never walked down the street and there's just dudes popping fucking pills on the street like everywhere you know where like you could just walk down the street you're smelling cigarettes you're seeing people smoke when you're driving you see smoke come out of people's cars and you're like fuck man like yeah that constant reminder dude cigarettes like aziz did every drug ever and he's like nothing is as hard to quit as cigarettes wow yeah that's i mean and then you see you know you see people who let's say aren't even let's say addicts with alcohol drugs whatever they smoke cigarettes quit cigarettes and they gain 60 pounds or something yeah like that's a visual representation

of this is really something that you have to compensate for you know yeah and the the oral addiction just that that thing yeah doing something that you're you're fixing two of those things right hands and mouth your hand in your mouth now all of a sudden you're like all right i got two of these jesus christ man cigarettes are crazy and that's the other thing like they're the only they're the worst thing to get off and the only thing that you fucking don't get high from yeah that's so true it's nuts the only the only like real highs like the the very first i remember the very first time i did and i was driving and that was not good so i was in florida and there's so many rednecks a lot of people don't realize how like country-ass florida is you know yeah and like

all these guys that i'm friends with and grew up there they're like you dip how they're dipping like now they're like oh man it's the best you know you kind of start seeing it everywhere somebody gives me a dip i put it in and i get in my car to drive and i am i'm talking i'm high like you fucking just gave me dilotted yeah like my vision everything i'm like and then in my mind i go is this what dipping is like every i don't realize it's that first time but i start thinking like is this what dipping is going to be like every time because i'm fucking in like this is amazing and it's so gnarly you know having a spit cup everywhere and then you fucking drink out of your spit cup on accident it's fucking disgusting it's so gross

and of course there's the whole oral decay gums teeth i mean i but i probably did it on and off from 16 to like i don't know 19 or 20 it's not that long but it was enough to be to feel like this this is another fix there's like it's something to do you know yeah it's like that and i love to do it like i don't know the more country-ass people i was around or i'd want to do it yeah yeah the the first cigarette i ever smoked was a marlboro red and i almost fell through a bookcase like like just like that like i almost fell backwards like because i did i like fell backwards and like into it and then i almost like it was a real mess but like somehow things didn't get too bad um like i find it's oh yeah this uh this is unbelievable somebody got

a tattoo a fan got this tattoo oh my god how the fuck he didn't fall proto buddy you're done wow look at that i mean that's gonna end up on sucky tattoos page i think is that an actual tattoo artist hoof gotta follow proto oh man well fed smoker would tell your fucking tattoo artist you're fired bud that's like the fucking Blair witch font yeah it is oh man it's so sloppy i love it and i i think fed smoker would be proud sir congratulations thank you for getting a uh a funnel proto jesus christ you know you know what i wanted to ask you so if let's say like the movers are moving you guys to austin you you grab one of them aside and you slip them

100 bucks and you're like you'll make sure like this one thing of christina's doesn't get to austin yeah what would that one thing be if that's a really good question thanks man um her wardrobe no i'm just that fucking mouth of hers stupid mouth i'd be like hey man is there a way you could dump her body in west texas uh definitely her flossers um right i would definitely you know she'd just go buy those again there's just gotta be some bullshit of hers that she has laying around that i'm fucking oh she has this goddamn like here we go yeah she has this fucking like statue you know that i think her mother had that's like it's just it's gaudy you know it's like a like a posed woman it's like a brass statue weighs like fucking 500 pounds i'm

like where do you want to put this and we had it in a bathroom and i'm like so weird in here let's put it in the bedroom in a corner and you're like i think we both don't like it but you kind of like don't know where to put it yeah i would love to get rid of it bud hey bud want to make an extra c-note um so check this out this is uh this i don't think this has audio it's gonna be on this screen here you're gonna see uh but i haven't seen this yet either i just know it's in the horrible or hilarious uh category uh oh i see where this is going fuck oh my god oh bro oh shit oh man oh fuck anybody who's just listening we just saw a car back into a person like in between uh so he's facing like he's at a little like kiosk like a stand

and he's facing like into the window probably like paying for parking or something yeah and the car backs out of a space and right into him and then like backs into him again the uh the only thing that this is missing is good audio so zolo layered good audio with it oh hell yeah yeah you know you know what this looks exactly like it's gonna be like it's gonna be one of these new like kia commercials yeah that lets you know like hey if someone's there your car will tell you your car this is just like nah she like slammed them twice yeah i'm saying she because we know who drives like that and by the way like what i what just hit me was if that person wasn't there

she's hitting the car or that stand oh she's crushing it yeah she's gonna destroy that thing yeah a person that's completely checked out good thing that person protected that stand so definitely hilarious very hilarious yeah that's a good one that's a very good one oh man and then i saw this uh this somebody sent me this they linked me this and i think i sent it to you guys it's just so ridiculous oh i'm disrespectful towards him if he disrespectful towards me because i'm not that bitch that need 40 dollars yep i got my own job yep i got my own car yep i pay my own bills yep i'm that bitch so what do i need you for not a damn thing now go somewhere with all that and that's on who that's on my head a little lamb

what i don't know they called me daddy long leg eyes yeah i think um i think that's on my head a little lamb got you um yeah that's on god that is yeah uh she um i don't know she's i think you're very pretty i would i would just dial it down a notch yeah she needs a cigarette cigarette and a little little ghp yeah it'd be fine you ever dip it this on your head a little lamb i don't know what you're talking about uh fuck uh you know it would be so great if you could get like you know how they have like those instagram lives where two people fucking talk back and forth if you could get like her to talk to like you know oh my god like just mixing up the

fucking characters on instagram lives would be fucking on shine oh i'm trying to i'm trying to get together with him he he's like oh he's letting me eat you god yeah y'all know what's a banana split i won't make you cry god oh he would lose his mind with her i fucking he reminds me of my grandpa he does yeah jesus did the way he like his whole vibe like like not so much of stuff some of the stuff he says but he just reminds me of my grandpa that is quite a grandpa yeah oh my grandpa was nuts man yeah in the best way like is he still around uh no he passed away but he was he was just like there was no filter like he just says he just see whatever was on his mind whatever's on his mind this let me eat you yeah make him cry go um tell me if you think this is horrible or

hilarious this is uh this was at the mountain of hell race in 2019 in the french alps oh oh that is a steep fucking drop oh yeah oh oh oh no oh holy shit a thousand people just crashed on their bikes i think this obviously goes into hilarious yeah because what are you expecting wow do you know where my anxiety goes where's my bike wow i wouldn't even think i would be like where's my foot where's the fucking bike at man and i'd be so pissed if i saw i'm like dude that's my bike what are you fucking doing

oh that would yeah like if somebody grabs your bag like an airport come here like what are you crazy have you ever had that you know um you know those flights where you you get on and then they take your bag because it's small like a regional jet you know for like a small like small connecting flight right so you're not on a major aircraft right so when you like it's mandatory they like they look at your bag and they go it's too it's too big for the yeah yeah so i i did one one time where i put it on there and and then when you get off you stand on the jet bridge and an airline worker puts the bags at the bottom of the jet bridge and everybody walks up it takes their bag i saw a guy approach what i thought was my bag and i was like and he looked at me and i was like

all right and then he walks away and then there's another same bag and i grab it and we each have each other's bag right wow yeah like and i had hesitated to say it because i didn't want to appear rude basically and be like you have my bag right but i even though i was like i'm pretty sure that's my bag but you know he he grabbed it with such certainty that i was like i was like oh something my bad and then i see it and i was like i don't think this is mine i opened his bag and i was like this is not my bag fuck i thought you were gonna say you know those flights you get on and then you realize oh i haven't taken my dating profile picture and then you have to and then you have to sit there and take it and then post it and that people

are fucking take a picture and go like you know you know what i could teach you and then that's it yeah that's my fucking bio how did you get how'd you get your bag back um i went to the uh to the gate and i told him i was like i saw the dude he took and i i had to make an announcement and um eventually the guy and i met up we met up in the airport it went pretty well for how bad that could have gone it went it went pretty went pretty well you know like he um i was like yeah i thought you had my bag and he was like i'm fucking say something what what do you think you would do if like whatever your favorite say to like walk around is when you're there like doing comedy or whatever like i'd say you're just walking down the street and all of a sudden like you saw you

coming and it was like identical identical yeah like an identical dude i freeze to you i would fucking panic i would freeze and then i would blow them i'd be like i gotta see what this is like we should just have christina walking here and see yeah what do you do yeah i gotta tell you this is your best episode yet you've been on fire today has anybody has anybody had their way with that in the studio like anybody it just it just uh got here oh wow so maybe um the dot are you gonna take it for a spin is it okay it comes with attachments oh shit you what what are you burying the lead well uh there's i don't know what youtube will that you could show it because it's not where it's supposed

to be but that's uh that's a front and a back hole yeah there's a this is clearly the badge here and then oh yeah that's clearly the butthole there so all right yeah and then next week she'll be like basically i got nutted in um this was also oh you are you know you're well aware of uh norm somerton right yeah yeah yeah it's for people that don't know hello today we're gonna make french canadian poutine oh so he uh yeah that's that is the right reaction when you know who it is it's to go yeah um and then he of course famous for his tit cups hello deviance his pig norman somerton in his tit call in his babies for seven hours so those are all those are old vids and we were we were really into norm for a while and then he just disappeared we had confirmation

that he was alive you know uh he's an older gentleman and we just don't know and now he's he's back and we're elated um i have not seen these clips i was just told that norm's back so here we go hello everybody it's pig norman somerton the pig is looking for a steady source of pig cum to fellas park belly if you're interested direct message me pig will not disappoint you we will have fun together oh hey big tiddler animal the eyebrow tats that's new right i know that didn't there used to be they were there there used to be little like snouts uh like clovers and then he filled them out i guess filling them out isn't it

is it's a real yeah now he's gone crazy well when you need cum you know i can really fuck with you he will not disappoint good lord jesus yes that pig mouth waits for you your cock stuff deep down my snout jesus hey you know what there's somebody watching this who's excited and that's why they say there's a lid for every pot there you go you know what you just found your dating profile bio yeah that's what you should actually looking for my lid yeah looking for my lid and that's it yeah don't explain it don't even put out the whole fucking sentence i'm looking for my lid that's it oh man this um this came in here and this is i don't know this was enjoyable this is me after for memoses this is me after seven memoses

this is me after two flights of memos this is me after all the flights of memoses don't talk i'm video oh she's getting on it oh man enjoy it while it lasts that's too many memoses oh fuck she lost two and this is this is me ready to be on a ymh video she looks like fucking half of the people on here now she fits right in yeah look at that that's normally the beginning of a of a fucking ymh video oh wow that was really great man god damn

that's so great that is so fucking great oh man we were we this morning when we got here we were talking about and I actually had this conversation yesterday also about how what people choose to share on social media yeah it's like it's gotten to the point especially when you know people there's strangers and you're like you play a video and you're like when you know people and you're like what are you what are you doing what are you sharing this for this is like a uh I mean what I mean wait what is that for who is that is that that's the file name of the thing that Christina said for for earlier but what is it what am I what is it in relation to um the in relation to rob I think oh oh that's

that's a lit for every pot oh this is a whole different thing that Christina wanted me to talk about this was a Pajitzki effect oh this was totally this is totally what what you were saying right yeah so what so you know everybody knows what Pajitzki effect is and yeah so mine I was it's funny because like you talk about Pajitzki effects and you don't realize like while you're talking about them you have them going on and you don't know they're weird so I moved into my apartment right before corona and I got like a fucking set of pots or whatever and this is the pot that I make rice in and during corona like I made rice five days a week you know like I was cooking and now I still am like I'm always cooking all my own food or whatever but I didn't have a lid for the pot so

I took a lid from another pot and I would use that lid for that pot but all the fucking condensation and shit gets up on the top and then it leaks all over the sides and sometimes I'll do like other shit in there like not just water like fucking chicken broth or like whatever it just comes out everywhere and it comes out everywhere and gets all over the stove so after I cook I have to clean this the whole stove off and I was doing that every day for a year and then I finally realized I'm like oh I can go on Amazon and spend eight dollars and get a lid for this pot and then and so I ordered it two days ago and as I ordered it I was like this is a fucking Pajitzki effect and I said to Christina she's like yeah this is perfect this is that is perfect it's the it's just

what an I'm by the way but you can't but I'll tell you it is super I get super annoyed super annoyed when I put a pot on the stove and I'm trying to find the lid for it and like you said there's a lid for every pot except for the one I'm fucking looking for yeah right because I'll end up grabbing eight lids and I'm like how are none of these for this one same thing with Tupperware I'm like all right I'm gonna put the stuff away I get the Tupperware thing out and I start trying the lids the tops for it none not one not one fits makes me lose my mind yeah and then you just like you know we love to make fun of people but then you love to make fun like I the first thing I did was like I gotta take a picture of this and send it to everyone and tell them how stupid I am

yeah yeah because that's what you deserve if you're making fun of people you gotta you know you're right you gotta you gotta stand in the firing line too yeah I like it I like it it's true before I forget I also just did an appearance on Rogan on JRE I was the first guest in his new studio so it was very cool really cool setup I always have a good time with Joe I think we did close to four hours which is like cash for Joe yeah fucking four or five days a week he does that it's it's not it he's I don't know more energy and capacity to talk to anybody I know but speaking of Joe we also we're talking about like how we uh how we diet you know how we eat and like for me right now where I'm like trying to take really good care of myself I can't do it without like

structure I have to have structure if I try to like I remember for years people are like just eat healthy and then like every once in a while fuck off or something I'm like okay and I would try to do that and it just I can't I have to I have to like know what to eat at 8 11 you know 130 330 and 6 otherwise I just fucking fall apart man yeah I can't do it like right now this is shake you know and I like I make it and I go like if I don't bring this I'll fuck around and eat something shitty yeah I can't do it any other way I'm just I'm on the one meal a day train you're super lean man yeah well I mean I was I was fat when Soprano started I was 12 years old I was like 200 pound piece of shit like I was like you know I was real fucking fat 212 yeah I remember

well I went to the doctor and I forget I think it was like 198 on the card like they had a thing and it's like you try like height weight height weight and they make sure you're going on like the right path or whatever I remember seeing 198 and I was like you're a fat piece of shit like you're fucking disgust and I remember like it started like I started being uncomfortable when it was like oh like you know there's a pool in the summer and I'm like oh I want to wear a t-shirt and I'm like you're a fucking loser yeah yeah all that kind of shit so I went on the Atkins diet for a couple months I lost like I forget if it was 40 or 60 pounds whoa yeah and I was fucking like I guess at the time I was like 13 or 14 or whenever I did it and uh yeah I've kept it

off ever since like sometimes I go up and down or whatever but during corona I started just eating one meal a day like kind of like a late lunch dinner where I just do like fucking 2000 calories and like you know I'll just eat a fucking ton of food and then at night if I start to feel hungry in my head I'm like yo tomorrow you're gonna fuck shit up so I'm all right where if I'm on a diet and like at night I'm hungry let's go tomorrow you have a hard-boiled egg I'm like fuck that I want something now yeah you know so I have it in me to know like oh tomorrow you're gonna like fucking six o'clock tonight I'm just I'm gonna be disgusting and that's the thing now that I'm dating is that when you'll eat yeah probably but like well I woke up early today so maybe earlier but like

I now that I'm starting to date I'm like what am I gonna do like I don't want to fucking meet this girl for dinner and eat 2000 calories in front of her you know yeah but you look good so it's just gonna be like oh this guy is a fucking animal but it's wild when I eat like it's it's real fucking yeah like I eat what will you eat tell me what you'll eat I would eat at Jamie's house every sunday and we would all eat around like the kitchen counter and then they would all leave and go like watch tv and like postmates dessert and then they would come back in to eat dessert and I'd still be at the counter eating but like what's that what's a so right can I pee real quick of course we're back you peed there's nothing like a good pee and then every morning

part of the like whole diet shit when I wake up I drink like 60 to 100 ounces of water yeah that much every day yeah I've been doing my agent got me on to doing this and he explained it in a way that made a lot of sense to me um he's like when you wake up like he asked me first like what do you you know what do you do and I was like oh you know pee brush my teeth and blah blah blah and he goes you know if you um if you were to go to work like a regular job and from whatever nine to five you didn't drink anything you know how would you think you would feel at the end of it and I was like what I mean you'd be like dehydrated and he's like yeah and that's what you're doing like when you wake up you you just consumed nothing for eight hours or whatever and so

your body needs it you know and so he was like oh I try he's I think he's trying to drink like 16 to 20 some ounces like just out of the gate and I was like oh that's a good that's a good one I like that you know it's yeah flushing your system and then you also have the whole thing of like putting something in you but you're putting water into yourself so I try to wake up now and like do 20 30 ounces of water you do 60 to 100 yeah but it's just that's almost a gallon bro it's it's also like it's kind of easy for like I'm not like forcing water down like I'm the first 30 ounces is like nothing like I'm like I needed that yes you do need it you do need it after that it's just kind of like all right well also like I don't drink coffee and I

like to shit when I wake up so it's like it helps get things kind of going going yeah yeah I can do I can do 60 ounces in like the first couple hours of being awake though yeah oh that's what I mean yeah I mean like probably you know like right my first like 32 ounce bottle or whatever goes fucking fast like that's you know within 15 it's a good way to start the day I really really like doing it yeah it's fucking great it's just good and it's good to like you know like uh I forget who it was I think maybe like Jordan Peterson on Rogan or something was like got me into like making my bed when I wake up oh yeah and I had never done it until I was like 30 not once like ever made my bed I still haven't yeah and then at 30 I started doing it and I haven't

missed a single day now wow and it feels good yeah it's just a good thing of like I wake up you drink so then like you know it's kind of like going to the gym and then like later in a night you eat like shit and you're like yeah but I went to the gym like you know so it's like every time you kind of walk by like if shit sucks like you walk by your bed you're like oh yeah well like when I when I woke up and everything was fine like it kind of brings you back to that place of like okay yeah everything's all right you know yeah yeah it's a good like the gym thing definitely is a mood setter you know like makes you feel like I've been going now pretty much like six days a week working out you know and combination of like cardio is on all

six days and then I have some like I don't have any restrictions but I just have there's days where either the knee or arm will bother me more so I'll do more lifting with the other you know limb right but um and I still can't I still can't go heavy which I miss I miss like trying to lift heavy weight because it just feels good and I can't so I end up doing a lot more like body weight stuff or just lighter lighter weight high rep stuff do you feel any PTSD from your accident like loud noises or you see somebody full like no um I still laugh when people get hurt um what about if you had to like get a step off a curve or oh no I what the PTSD I'll tell you is that's a good one I um I look at floors way differently like if I'm gonna walk into like a

new setting I'll check out the floor because sometimes you'll notice wet spots I had a fucking near panic of um so when I get home I usually you know I take off my shoes right and I walk around in socks at home but we have hardwood floors and oh my god dude you know you don't think about it normally sometimes you know there's like a little slippery floor or whatever but when you're like not totally stable and you feel that slip so now I either wear wear shoes which I don't prefer or I take my socks off because I don't you don't slide barefoot on hardwood usually you know so that's totally totally new to me yeah now hospital socks nah it's not gonna work man I have my own flip-flops that I walk around really the yeah my apartment just because it's

terrified I mean there's a spot too of in our closet that's hardwood where it's like what for whatever reason it's like extra yeah like slippery doesn't like she's like Christina's been there remember because she was talking about I don't know why she's not saying anything now but she was talking about how it was slippery to her too do you think maybe she's making it slippery on purpose hoping you get hurt again is that what you're doing that's fucking evil Jesus just tired of being my suck puppet but uh she um yeah it that so I look at floors and stuff I do have a thing where if I talk about it enough like if I get if I get into the emotions of being there I'll get emotional right being in recovery and stuff you know not of getting hurt yeah it's a weird thing

where it's like you go like man are you like affected by getting hurt like by the injury I'm like no like it I can just talk about it I can talk about it for hours and fine if you talk to me about the emotions of being in recovery for whatever reason that would make me emotional well I think you might have said it too but it's also like it's how like all those people coming together like to help you yeah right that should that should affect me yeah that should affect me um you know the only time the only time I really cry like his death obviously is fucks me up but one of the things that makes me get emotional is like if I you know as an actor sometimes you go see I don't even like call myself an actor but you go see somebody who you love perform like you know Jamie Lynn did

like uh Broadway a whole bunch of stuff and when they come out at the end and everyone stands up and claps for them it gets me yes like I see them on stage and everyone's clapping and I'm sure yeah of course I like stand up and when people like standing ovation and people are screaming I get emotional with those I get fucking that hits me like I'm like but I've been on stage before yeah like where you know the enemies they had us on stage like at the premieres they always had us on and we would like you're standing ovation I feel nothing I I've gotten not in definitely not every time but in in some shows big theater shows you get a you just have a rock and roll show and you get an a me sometimes there's standing ovations that go like this section then that

section that section there's shows where you say thank you good night and 3000 people pop up and it's a rush but I don't I don't feel teary eyed in the least if I see a standing ovation for somebody and that person receiving the standing ovation is emotional I get emotional watching them right yeah but I don't get I don't get emotional like I'll I'll be like damn you know like like that feels amazing I'll walk off like holy shit how crazy was that but I don't it doesn't bring tears to my eyes right yeah yeah I don't know it's fucking it's it's weird like what why I don't know the whole thing is just fucking I can't wait to go to fucking I'm probably gonna move to Austin but like to see you and Christina do stand up I can't fucking wait dude it's so fun

I I forgot I've not totally forgot but just doing stand up more the last couple months it really is it's like it's like a like a somebody who goes like I used to run marathons and I took a year off for running right and and like now you go like I went on a run this week and you're like how was it you're like I fucking forgot it's like my favorite thing in the world it's what it's what makes me feel balanced and right in the world I mean I'm fucking doing it in two languages and it's so like that's like I feel like I'm doing that almost because I love it so much you know do you feel like you have like a any sort of like different outlook now at everything that's happened like the world your injury this when you go back or is it the same I'm I've said

this before but I'm definitely like I'm way more outgoing and way more social and I and I you know Christa Stefano who's a really great comic really funny guy he used to be a physical therapist oh really and he unprompted asked me these things he's like are you feeling like this do you feel like your personalities like that like all these things and I was like yeah he goes yeah totally normal I'm like what he goes yeah you know you see it all the time for whatever reason in orthopedic rehab injuries he goes we just see it all the time like people how like break out of their shell I don't think I'm like a completely different person but that aspect of me I'm looking like I don't know I try to talk to people more connect with people more I kind of enjoy it more and I

don't know why ripping your patellar tendon and breaking your arm did it to me but I I definitely noticed it in myself and I've talked about like I've done things where I'm you know I'll tell Christina you're not fucking gonna jump in on this I've told her like you know yeah you know I met so-and-so and now it just was like you know let's be fucking best friend like I'm just way more social and I don't know why well that's that's what's going like because it's happened to me recently because of the pandemic like I could see that going out back out on these dates and everything where I'm like yeah like getting oh I'm enjoying getting to know someone like even if it's something I don't like about them I'm like oh that's interesting like yeah you know you just

kind of what but do you feel like you've noticed at all but stand up or stand up the same I I do feel like so grateful to have it you know like there's there's things where you go like I'm just like I'm grateful for people friends relationships um my life like the things I get to do like this job yeah like I'm super grateful for that and stand up I feel like I'm just so happy to be back doing it you know I'm just so happy to be back doing it it really is for me like I try to explain it like you said the pandemic maybe combined I don't know with the injury and stuff but since 2006 I have traveled normally two weeks of every month to do stand up wow so 2006 so that's what 14 15 years of like like that's normal to me it is normal to me to be gone

doing this two weeks of every month for the like for the better part of the last two decades so to take a year off from it you know at first it was like a cool break then it felt strange then it's depressing then it's like you know you're like I don't know what the fuck's happening and like to feel like to going back to it now I'm over I'm elated to be back to it it's it's the best man it's dope I can't wait to see you guys yeah I can't wait man and you should come uh I I don't I can't announce it yet but I have like something that I will announce that's uh it's pretty wild like tour wise I mean it's definitely the craziest tour Cali or no oh El Mundo yeah yeah it's it's pretty wild and they you know the way that we are we announce them is like in chunks

because you can't just be like here's fucking 300 so like right but like yeah it'll it'll be pretty it's pretty bit I'm so excited I get to go basically everywhere that's awesome yeah um well look man this was super fun and I really like you're such a natural fit I love podcasting with you thank you for coming everybody if you have not checked out pajama pants podcast please do so now rate review and subscribe watch it on YouTube um is there anything else you want to plug anything no just thank you guys for everything you've done for us and also just like even before I had a podcast like you guys like you guys have thousands of hours of fucking laughs and entertainment out there and it's just like you like you hear people say that

shit like you make me having to like make dinner fun you know what I mean like I fucking sometimes like normally it could be like man I gotta go fucking especially during corona like yeah to go I get to go cook my fucking 300th meal in a row but like knowing my fucking laptop is there open and I'm watching fucking your mom's house it's just like it's it's so great you know that's awesome and that by the way that's so awesome to hear you say and it is by far I think like the the coolest messages to receive are I see those sometimes people go like you help me out through this period and you never think that you're doing that right you're just like oh we're just like here we're doing our thing and it's cool that people enjoy it so thank you I appreciate you saying that

closing song is it's Charles Willst bartending by Hendox this is a new Hendox I haven't heard it excited to hear it and thank you again Rob Eiler appreciate it man thank you eat 15 say ready to clock what am I attracted to you you're attracted to me what am I attracted to you you're attracted to me you're obviously a smart girl you're about to be a dentist you're obviously a smart girl you're about to be a dentist I'm in recovering a journey with an MBA who's about to be a millionaire in the next 18 months building a digital marketing game see well smart then let's hang out well smart then let's have a conversation

let's not let ourselves get busy I'll probably get super busy you'll probably get super busy I don't want that to happen without us at least sitting down having a little chat sitting down having a little chat sitting down having a little chat see you in good time what am I attracted to you you're attracted to me what am I attracted to you you you're attracted to me what's going on what's going on what's going on it's Charles from Batch I'm looking at Lily's you square there we go hey there we go it's got this really cool view

say ready to clock say ready to clock clock it's a team what am I attracted to you you're attracted to me what am I attracted to you you're attracted to me while beauty is very common beauty and brains is not is not you know that was in