Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Did We Hire Psychos?! w/ Dr. Hope Torres | Your Mom's House Ep. 819

Episode Date: July 16, 2025

SPONSORS: - Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at http://www.monarchmoney.com/ymh - Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://BlueChew.com! Try your first month of BlueChew FREE when you use promo code YMH -- just pay $5 shipping. - Go to http://helixsleep.com/YMH for 27% Off Sitewide. - Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. This week on Your Mom’s House, Christina and Tommy welcome Dr. Hope Torres, an Austin-based licensed professional counselor specializing in trauma and personality assessment to analyze Tom, Christina, and the entire YMH staff. Before the doctor is in, the Main Mommies update us on what they've been up to, Tommy's on a water fast and Tina looks like a crypto millionaire now. They open the show with a really cool guy yelling at a bartender, before checking out a new video of an old favorite, Dan Pena, who explains why he likes having a painting of Hitler in his office. They also check out a clip of Charlize Theron bragging about banging a dude in his 20's and Christina shares her thoughts on the movie "Sinners" hmmmm hmmmm hmmmm. Dr. Torres then comes in and shares the results of a personality assessment that everyone at Studio Jeans filled out and determines on a scale of normal to traumatized combat vet where Tom, Christina, and the entire staff rank. She walks the YMH crew through their results on the PID-5 personality inventory (DSM‑5). and breaks down the personality domains like anxiety, impulsivity, narcissism, and eccentricity. There's also plenty of insight into how trauma, dissociation, and childhood behaviors can shape adult personality. Whether you’re looking for laughs, self-reflection, or a crash course in personality diagnostics, this deeply human episode is a must-listen. Your Mom’s House Ep. 819 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:05:13 - Mom & Dad Updates 00:13:13 - Opening Clip: Angry Dad 00:19:42 - Bert Kersher Interrupts The Show 00:23:05 - Dan Pena 00:32:49 - Charlize Theron's Sex Positive Encounter 00:38:06 - Christina Saw "Sinners" 00:46:26 - The Doctor Is In 00:53:24 - Who's Doing Ok? 01:01:02 - Mid Tier Crazies 01:10:55 - Top 3 Psychos 01:27:31 - The Biggest Studio Psycho 01:38:35 - Mentally Ill Main Mommies 01:53:35 - The Other Normies 01:57:24 - Closing Song - "Therapy Breakthrough" by Pete Sake Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What's everybody? Summer is here and we've got some awesome new stuff in the YMH store. Survive this godforsaken heat long enough to check out the entire summer collection available now at store.ymhstudios.com. Welcome, welcome to your mom's house. It's me, your brain. And I, your mouth. I act on logic. I act on taste. For me, Pizza Hut's Nashville Hot Chicken Pizza with Spicy Fried Chicken, Pickles, and Creamy Ranch Drizzle is confusing.

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Willkommen, willkommen. Willkommen to. Sorry, I just got excited because I didn't know if you're still into your Hitler summer. Um, yeah, I mean, I'm just kind of waiting. I'm waiting every day for another new Hitler story to come out. It feels like it's such a bummer. You're like, well, I've only seen 25 documentaries.

There's nothing new. I know, they constantly find a way to retell the greatest insanely story. It's one of my favorite things about the summer. The summer. Is getting a new World War II doc. But sometimes you were into, you turned into a Vietnamese summer for you too.

I don't like it as much. Why is that, Tommy? It's the story is just, you know why? Honestly, it's a dirtier, murkier story. That's really what it comes down to. World War II is such a clean, traditional, good versus evil story. Like the fact that it's real makes it like, oh my God,

because you usually hear these stories in fantasy. Yeah, you're like, what? That guy did what? And then he took over what? It's really, it's a good versus evil story. And then Vietnam is just so murky and dirty. Convoluted. You mean literally the country is dirty?

No, I mean like the... The jungle? Everything that goes into what led to the war and the you know There's manipulation and there's all these lies and it's just it's it's very sad. It's very disturbing Yeah, and Americans were killed quite a fight. I don't like yeah, it's okay if the Krauts die Right, but not if good Americans die. Yeah. Also, yeah, the fashion wasn't as great in Vietnam big big point of contention for me too. Didn't like that.

What's up with the fashion? The food, you know, I like Vietnamese food. I know you're not into it. I like Vietnamese food. You do? Sure. Also, interesting fact, your father, who was in Vietnam, told me, I'll never forget, he goes,

you know the worst part Christina trench foot Gotta keep your socks dry. Yeah, otherwise your feet they just the feet are the first thing to go. Yeah Yeah, and I learned that you know, you take the trenching tool. There was another one trenching tool you gotta take a shit and you endangering yourself a hole in your chin and then you're like cool. Yeah I'll tell you this. He's not a fan of Vietnamese food and you end up yourself a hole in your chin. And then you're like, cool, that's cool. That was interesting. I'll tell you this, he's not a fan of Vietnamese food. No, I know. It's not even a joke.

And we tried so hard to get him to even try Korean barbecue. That was crazy to me. Which was so, it's so good. We were living in Koreatown. And I was like, hey, you wanna get Korean barbecue? This guy looked at me like I was like, hey, you wanna get Korean barbecue? This guy looked at me like I was like, hey, wanna fuck your mom later today?

He goes, what the fuck? I go, Tommy, what kind of question is that? And I go, what? He goes, I don't like that shit. And I go, it's meat, it's Korean barbecue. It's like ribs and shit. He's like, oh, no, I'm good. But he also didn't like Italian food.

No, it was crazy. Which is like your dad didn't like a lot of stuff that most of humanity enjoys. You know who's a good actor? Joe Pesky. Joe Pesky. Ugh. Yeah, he's good.

Have you ever heard his name said that way? Joe Pesky. Bothered me so much. I was thinking about it last night. That was like 30 years ago. It's like but it's one of those things like you're you're you go through your life Somebody passes you have your grief and then there's things that still stick with you and last night I was like who the fuck says Joe Pesky? It was insanity.

Yeah, it was so crazy to me. It is, and he would mispronounce a lot of things. Wasn't there other actors and other pedophile? He would say, that guy's a pedophile. And like, he just had a different, I mean, my parents. I remember that. He was even foreign. You know, one time he said that to me. He goes, is that with feet? And he goes, no, I mean my parents. He was even foreign. I mean, you know, one time he said that to me, he goes, is that with feet?

And he goes, no, it's the kids. I go, oh, you mean, P-O, P-O, all right, right, yeah, yeah. He was like, yeah, yeah. I go, why are you saying that like that? You wanna get something at the buffet? I love, I still say buffet from him. The buffet?

I love the buffet. We were in Washington, which is something that other people say too though. Washington's very common. So Ellis, our son, we adopted a cat from a cat cafe here in Austin, the perfecto cat lounge. Shout out to them because the woman who owns it's lovely and they rescue cats and rehabilitate them and you can, you know.

Yeah, especially if they committed a crime, they're like, give them a second chance. I remember. So true. Anyway, can, you know. Yeah, especially if they committed a crime, they're like, give them a second chance. Yes. Yeah. I remember. So true. Anyway, he didn't know, he called it the cat buffet. Yeah. And I was, I didn't correct him because I'm like, technically it is.

It's kind of a cat buffet in here. A cat buffet. Yeah. Which was adorable. Cat buffet. Anyway, we have so much to get into. First of all, just an update. This is a heavy episode.

Why I'm looking still like. Oh yeah. So I got the staples out of, just an update. This is a heavy episode. Why I'm looking still like. Oh yeah. So I got the staples out of my head, which is great, because that was really freaking me out. And turns out they do use a tool. They put it, it's like a staple remover from like Home Depot.

But it opens the staple under the skin and then they pull it out. It was, it hurt, no lie. Your look is evolving. You were the Hamburglar last week. And today, you kind of look like a crypto millionaire. A little bit like somebody who's, you know, doing things that are kind of shady, but making money doing them. Cool. Well, thanks Josh Zollo for procuring this special Bauhaus hat.

Very cool. I don't usually wear caps because I don't like how they make my ears look. Well, thanks Josh Zollo for procuring this special Bauhaus hat. Very cool. I don't usually wear caps because I don't like how they make my ears look. What are you fucking 70? Ball cap. You got a ball cap on your head? You guys, my parents never said, you know what it's a ball cap, I don't know, sun visor, you told me it was wrong, and then chewing gum. Wearing a cap is like what someone from the 1930s would say. What is this? A hat?

It's a cap. It's a baseball cap. Okay any I Mean, you know, technically yeah, it's a cap Technically he doesn't say this one. Well guys, sorry, okay growing up my family didn't wear this stuff I don't know what this shit's called Sun Visor a Sun Visor chewing gum chewing gum Chewing gum and then baseball cap. Okey dokey. Anyway, sorry, update, staples are out. Staples are out.

Stitches are out. Faces coming together. Faces coming together, it's still bruised and I'm not allowed to wear makeup yet. So when I can wear makeup, I will debut these eyes. And I'll tell you something, you're gonna like the way I look, I guarantee it. You guarantee it, yeah.

So you went through, I got jealous that you got you know, so much work done and you're looking younger So I'm on a water fast. I this is incredibly Torturous that you're doing and tell them for how long five days I have to point this out to some of the I would say the challenged folks out there. It doesn't mean I'm going five days without water, which is what some people, they were like, that's crazy. You can die if you don't have water for five days.

I'm like, no, no, it's only water. It's only water. You're allowed to have black coffee, water with salt. You can have some sugar-free electrolytes. So I'm doing those things. The water with salt, you can have some sugar-free electrolytes. So I'm doing those things. The water with salt is great, because it's gonna make you shit. That'll make you shit, I'm pretty sure.

But you know what, you're like one of these yogis. That's what they do in India when you meditate. Are you meditating? You should really use this time to do psychedelic drugs and meditate. I'm serious, you're gonna have like epiphanies, bro. Yeah. Ride the snake. Ride the wave. Let's see where I'm at right now. I am at, um, it was 36, 37,

I'm at 40 hours. How do you feel? I'm hungry. Like I'm not like freaking out. I just, um, this thing keeps happening. I told you yesterday, where you kind of lose your thought about it and then you feel hungry and you see something. Oh, there's a snack, like a protein bar. Oh, I should eat that, I'm hungry. And then I'm like, oh, I'm doing it.

I forget that I'm fasting. You forget. And have you had any epiphanies or realizations in your hunger? No, everyone who's told me to was they're like they most people told me that two days two to three are like the worst And that everybody has well, I was just say everybody but a lot of people have told me that Getting into day four is where you really feel good. I don't know and do you have do you lose your train of thought? Cuz when I'm hungry, I can't think yeah I've been losing focus

I'm not like super agitated, but you know you want to eat man grumpy I'm really proud of you because normally in our like everyday life like you wake up And you have to eat right away. Otherwise, you're an angry bear. You've been really Harnessing your bear. I don't know how you're doing it. Yeah. It's good that I have so much going on. I think being focused, trying to be busy on things is good. So exciting.

Well, I'm excited for you. You're probably gonna lose like 80 pounds because well, how many, that's like a lot. You're gonna lose so much weight. I don't think it'll be that dramatic. I lost three pounds from yesterday to today. Just shitting in water and stuff? I guess, yeah.

Have you been shitting like crazy? No, not yet, but also I thought that was, I was like, oh, I guess I'm not having that. Like I mentioned it today and people were like, oh no, it's coming. I was like, oh. Is it just because your body is just relaxed, like it's not digesting? I don't know the science behind it. Will you look up why during a fast you shit everything out of you? Like is it just like your body's it's all your body's all hey, dude, we're bit

We don't have stuff to do right now That's an interesting way of wording it is all type it just like that. How come your body's like, oh shit There's always shit coming out Diarrhea during fasting while not experienced everyone, can be linked to several factors, including the body's response to the lack of food, changes in bowel movements, and potential dehydration. Sudden introduction of food during refeeding also trigger it. Well, that makes sense when you eat again, but when you're fasting, I don't understand

why it happens. Fasting can slow down the gastro-cocholic reflex, which is the body's natural response to food entering the stomach by triggering a bowel movement. When you suddenly break a fast, well, that's breaking the fast. Bro, we need to go and get you some pancakes, waffles. That's the way to do it. Everyone said- Cinnamon rolls, dude.

When you break the fast, they go, go hard. Eat a lot of sugar, a lot of carbs. Yeah, that's what I'm playing. A lot of fat. Well, my first post colonoscopy meal was a cinnamon roll. Remember that, dude? Oh my God. It was so good. Yeah.

I love that shit. Yeah, me too, man. So good. I like that shit too. That was a fucking, hold on, dude. It was a fucking cinnamon roll waffle. Yeah. Super Texas fatty treat,

and then eggs and fucking hollandaise sauce and shit. Can I tell you the best thing I heard when I was in my oncologist's office? This is where people get chemotherapy. So I'm in the waiting room with people who are waiting to get chemotherapy to treat their active cancer, and I hear this family talking

and the person who's clearly sick is like, let's go get some deep fried pork chops after this. There's a place where you can get deep fried pork chops. And I'm like, really? You have cancer right now. I know, but can I tell you something? You're gonna do that? I actually regret that when my dad was alive and sick,

that I would get irritated by his food choices. Cause looking back on it, I was like, He's already. Yeah, he's dying. Like just let him, you know what I mean? Cause I would be like, really? And he was like, what? I go, I mean, is this a good thing to have right now?

And he was like... Don't, but you know what though, you were good with him because I remember the last trip you guys took. Yeah. We ordered him a bacon cheeseburger and he was super. No, I know, I ordered him a lot of stuff. Yeah. But even like by like the third day

when he was like leaving, I was like, hey man, can I just talk to you about like what you're eating though? And he was like, what's that? And I was like, I mean, can I just talk to you about what you're eating though? And he was like, what's that? And I was like, don't you think you should be maybe being a little more cautious about what you eat? I know, I know what you're saying. Yeah, I think if somebody is sick like that,

you should just let them eat their own. Well, if you're not terminal, Yeah. and you wanna live, right? No. Just still eat the deep fried pork chops? Let people eat what they wanna eat. Yeah. And you want to live? Right? No. Just still eat the deep fried pork chops? Let people eat what they want to eat. Yeah.

Yeah. I think that's my realization. That's what this fast has taught me. No. Let people eat what they want to eat. You know, and I think Lena Dunham shares your philosophy. Here we go. Let's open the show.

Let's open the show. You're the most ignorant fucking that I've ever met. Really? Yeah! I didn't do anything to you! Fuck you! Fuck you! I bought you three drinks and as soon as you got the Hennessy in you, you went fucking ballistic on taking it out on every man in the fucking world. Fuck you!

Fuck you! This is a big fucking mess. Fuck you! This is a big fucking mess. Fuck you! Fuck you! This is a big fucking mess. Fuck you!

Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck in the fucking world. Fuck you! Fuck you! This is a cool clip.

Oh my god. Don't bring anyone loving to this. This is so rad. Wow. Makes me feel good inside. Mom, Sigurah, I gotta get my phone. There's Superboy. Welcome to your Mom sicker I gotta get my phone This is the difference between mom life and dad life.

I always got to keep my phone with me just in case something's up with the kids. Oh, right. Right. Also, we left our kids with your sister today. And she's not used to the full force of our sons. Yeah. In the pool. Yeah. That's what she's going to be saying to them in about 30 minutes. It's just like, I can't take this shit anymore. You know, believe it or not, there may have been a time in my life I'm sitting to them in about 30 minutes. It's just like, I can't take this shit anymore.

You know, believe it or not, there may have been a time in my life where I had a little problem with online shopping. I may have spent too much. It happens. And between juggling bills, tracking your spending and planning for the future, it's hard to keep track of where all of your money is going.

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cause you're a. He's right. Yeah. And see me? I apologize. I love you because you're a c*** He's right Yeah And Sydney, I apologize I really wanted to talk to you I wanted to ask you out for dinner But you're not a c*** Fucking lawyer

I'm gonna take the hot I'm gonna take the hot The way he looked at that camera at the end right here, makes me think he set it up Yeah, he did I'm gonna put my camera here so I can get myself saying The way he looked at that camera at the end right here, it makes me think he set it up. Like he was like, I'm gonna put my camera here so I can get myself saying, fuck you to Sydney. And I think he's right.

I think you're right. Yeah. And I like the, this, I don't do this enough. Yeah, this isn't, this is. I feel like this is so good. Yeah, that's a really good one. Fuck you, man. It really, yeah.

God, I love places when they have multiple TVs It's so cool cuz it's yeah, dude Like a lot of loud like different noises different voices going on fun Yeah, I want to watch all the games at once everything. Yeah. Yeah, have some nature shit going on I want to see some fucking cricket from India. We're all on TV. It's great. I wish it were that That's wild really Yeah, he's so proud of himself, you're right That's what this is about

I bought you three drinks and as soon as you got the Hennessy in you. That's what this is about. What did he say? I fucked you three drinks. I bought you three drinks and as soon as you got the Hennessy in you. So he's kind of like just resentful of the fact, honestly, that he bought her three drinks. 100% and she's not in him. It's the same thing where the guy is like, you're hot and they're like, get away. And he's like, fuck you bitch. Yeah. It's just the same old story.

It's literally, you're a fucking cunt. You're the most ignorant cunt I've ever met in my life. And can I tell you, I don't- Oh, hold on. Here's Bertrand. I think he's on set on his show. We have to say hi. Oh.

Hello? Oh, somebody's in, somebody got makeup. Let me see. I will. Well, hi, Bert. Hey, hey, hey. How's it going, buddy? How you guys doing? Good, day one? Good, first day of shooting. Great man, I'm happy for you.

You look good. Here, Leanne, tell them what I look like. Here, hold on, this is my outfit. Oh sorry, wrong way, wrong way. Hi Leanne. Hello guys. That is real cool. Let me see.

Whoa, he looks awesome! Wow, you look really cool man. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited.

I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I is real cool. Let me see. He looks awesome. Wow, you look really cool man. I like your shorts Bert. Looks adorable. Are you playing a sex symbol?

Because I'm feeling it. What are you guys doing? We're doing a podcast man. We're just recording right now. Oh you're doing a podcast right now? Right now, yeah. Yeah, we're doing your mom's house. Yeah.

Oh, nice. Nice, nice. Well, look. I'll send you my stand-ins. Where are you filming? He's in Atlanta. What's up? How you doing?

Hey, Bert. I'm losing you. Yeah, I'm losing you. Bert, you gotta see my eye work. I had a brow lift and an eye work done. You tell him? Are you serious? It looks so good.

Wait until you see my eyes. I look 25 years younger. All right, now listen, when I come to Austin, I need to get all this dead black skin off my face. Oh, yeah, I'll help you. Yeah, I mean, that's- I got sight. What's dead black?

I was kissing Leanne with makeup on and she goes, oh my God, you look so young. And I went, oh. Yeah, because you do look young right now. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I do. I mean that's... What's dead black? I was kissing Leanne with makeup on and she goes, Oh my God, you look so young. And I went, oh. Yeah, you do look young right now.

I know, I look young as shit. You know what you should start doing? Wearing makeup every day. What? That's good. Yeah. That's so cool. Just wear makeup more.

Yep. It's natural. All right, have a great shoot, man. Have fun, Bert. I'll talk to you later. Congrats. All right, love you too. All right. Have a great shoot, man. Have fun, Bert. I'll talk to you later. Congrats. All right, love you too. All right.

That's so sweet that he calls you. Well, I call, I send him a message to have a great shoot. It's his first day shooting? Today's the first day shooting his series, yeah. Oh my God. That's so cool. He's so happy. You guys are both just like crushing it right now.

I mean, I heard you announced it on Two Bears. You're shooting your movie in New Mexico. You have New Mexico pretty soon. I know, I think maybe by the time this episode comes out, they'll announce some of the cast. Oh my God, I'm so fucking pumped for you, babe. This is so funny. It's gonna be fantastic.

And I'm looking forward to being an Albuquerque with the kids. Yeah. Okay, you know, looking forward to being an albuquerque with the kids. Yeah. Okay. All right. I want to die. Anyway, I was going to say that I respected him until I saw what he's drinking, which is like hard lemonade. Yeah. Which is like, isn't that the drink of pedophiles? Mike's hard lemonade. It's pretty lame. Isn't that what the guy always brings when he wants to have sex with a minor in those shows. A lot of those, a lot of wine coolers, yeah.

Wine cooler, he's drinking like a 12 year old girl. What man drinks wine coolers? It's really bad. That's not acceptable. It's also, I'll tell you who drinks wine, a guy who thinks it's okay to walk up to a bar and be like, you fucking cunt. Like that's, it's not okay.

I love this shit. I hate to jump around. Yeah. But I'm so excited to show you something that I saw. So one of our favorites, like one of the absolute, you know, best that we ever featured on this show is this guy. Hanging out with losers.

Yeah. Right? Wasting your time with people that mean the same to you. Correct. Yeah, correct. Show me your friends and I'll show you your future. That's one of your top, top three. It is.

Three pieces. Show me your friends and I show you your future. You wanna know why you're all fucked up? Just look at the fucking bums you hang around with It's my dad. There you go. It's pretty good. This is why you're fucking poor I can do it all day. Yeah, it's pretty great, right? You're a cool guy not me. Yeah You know this he had so many great ones, right? Do you realize the rest of the world lasted us? Yes

Do you realize the Russians think we're all fat? You realize most of the people are fat? Yeah, he's right. Because we are! We're the best with the humanity! And then, so, you know,

Dan Pena, I'm just doing that so people know, you know, we you know, I'm just doing that so people know, you know We started playing these guys clips years ago, and then we had them on the podcast Oh, and then we had lunch with lunch with him. IRL haven't seen them in years haven't talked to him in years and I'm going into my folder just looking at what's in here for the show and I see damn paying like I'm a scene day, dude I'll do whatever it takes. Yeah.

Well, that means something different to me. It means something different to guys like Hitler. Why do I have Hitler's picture behind my desk? Because he's arguably the best salesman that ever lived. How do you get 60, 70, 80 million people to genocide 10 million people? Either those 10 million people had to do something terrible, which wasn't the case, or you got to be a slick motherfucker. I mean, and he was, okay.

And that's why I have his picture behind my desk. I mean, I don't know that I've ever heard somebody be like, oof. As well, I took my kids and I, we went to the Bahamas. So that's what that is there. That's when I got married. It was a golf trip. One of my friends we went to, we played Pebble Beach. I love Pebble Beach, yeah.

That's a great place. That's Hitler. Sale, crazy salesman, Probably the best salesman. Were you related to him or why is he on your? This is Morocco. We went to Morocco. It's fucking wild. Babe and it's not just on his family it's behind his desk. Behind the desk. Like that's where you sit. That's where you put like your primo photographs. Yeah. Oh Oh this guy? Oh, yeah, I met Bill Belichick. So I got his photo. There's you know, he won a bunch of Super Bowls pretty cool I mean something different to guys like Hitler. Yeah

I wish we could Photoshop a picture with like Hitler's arm around him and with like a note like a thumbs up Yeah, your friend. Arguably the best salesman that ever lived. I mean, look, is he logically correct? I know what he's trying to say. It's just an interesting choice. You know what I mean? Like, it's an interesting choice. You know, and normally I don't,

well, you don't, put it this way. Some of the best people we love creatively were bad people in real life, but Hitler was a bad person in his job too. So I don't think we can separate the man from the talent. You know what I'm saying? What's up with that Hitler photo? Oh, well I have it for like sales reasons.

It's the salesmanship is what I'm into. Cause you know, I sell things. Oh, you're thinking, no, no, no, no, not that. Not that guy. Just you know, guy who's fucking slick, man. He's just a cool guy. Just a real fucking cool guy. Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Did I ever tell you, this is beautiful, thank you. Ah! Ah! Ah! Did I ever tell you, this is beautiful, thank you. By the way, so this is a deep tissue calf massage, there is no, there's a 0.0% chance

that that is making him better. That is not helping him at all. Screaming. Yeah. Screaming. I know. Can I tell you what, one? Yeah speaking of a Hitler portrait Like you ever date somebody and then you go back to their home and their decor like there's just something

Go, I can't do this. Yeah, so there was this guy who I thought this was gonna be potential I was young. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I was young and Handsome potential. I was young. Really? Yeah. Oh yeah, I was young. And handsome, talented, bright future, like really, really cool. And I was like, all right, dude, I think this is gonna happen. We go out for lunch and he's like, you want to go back and see my apartment, my house? He actually had a house. And I was like, yeah, cool. So I go back to the house and I go, I have to use the restroom. I use the restroom and on the toilet are about 50 or 60 figurines, like Star Wars figurines.

And then I was like, all right, I think I'm out. And then I go, I just peek into his room. I'm like, I wonder what the bedroom's like if there's Star Wars on the toilet. Life-size cutout Chewbacca. Like at the foot of the bed. And I was like, I'm gonna die. At the foot of the bed?

At the foot of the bed. So like he- I'm surprised you like chicks. That's not like chick bait. Exactly. How old were you? 20, like literally just getting out of college. Maybe last year of college. Hmm

Very in LA. He's in LA. No, I don't want to say I don't want to give away too many details But you think everyone's gonna be like, I know that Chewbacca guy. I mean, I don't know fuck I'm afraid to like they're like soon as she said Boston Look, you know, I don't know. I've known the same people for 30, 40 years. I've been friends with the same people. They know who I'm referring to. So this isn't a friend group, you understand? Oh yeah, I got you.

But that was. And so wait, how did you handle the dip out? How'd you dip? I mean, no, I was polite. So then the other thing is, he's like, you wanna watch something? And then he shows me like a cartoony thing. Yeah. And I was like, all right. I thought he was gonna's like, you wanna watch something? And then he shows me like a cartoony thing. And I was like, all right.

I thought he was gonna be like, you wanna watch something? And you're like, let me guess, Star Wars? And he's like, how'd you know? Exactly. Yeah, I love that movie. And you're like, no shit. If you're looking to buy a new mattress,

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and I was like, you know, I gotta go with my friends, because I was visiting this town. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn't living there anymore, so I was visiting. Yeah, but that can deter one. Could you imagine walking into a Dan Pena's house, and you're like, this guy's a millionaire, he lives in a castle, and then he's like,

and this, this is my desk. And you're like, hey, you know who that looks like? Well, it is, it is. Oh. It doesn't look like. Is there a reason? It is the guy. That you have it?

Fucking hell. Well, speaking of this world you're talking about, hooking up and whatnot, you see this clip, it's pretty exciting. I'm like sounding very cocky here, but I think it's because I have found this freedom in my 40s where I'm like, oh my god So I just want to say this in perspective. I've probably had three one-nights dance in my entire life. Okay But I did just recently f*** a 26 year old and it was really amazing

Yes, and I've never done that and I was like, oh, this is great. Okay. Okay Okay, I get what this done that and I was like, oh, this is great. Okay, okay Okay, I get what this is now. It's like Like This is okay. And now the girls like oh my god. Okay. Awesome. This type of girl. It's the worst I can't like I It's my kryptonite. Go for it. That's so cool. That's so, The funny thing that I always find about clips like this, like chicks do this, right?

And they're like, go for it. And then they say, like this is the, this is the mental gymnastics of this bit. Like they'll say, why isn't it okay for her? And you're like, oh yeah, she can. She can. Great. Just shut up, don't tell people. And then when the guy does it, then they flip on it and they go, you're a pig.

You're a piece of shit, yeah. Right, and like you're not supposed to do that, but for the woman, now you have to like celebrate her. Well, here's the diff, here's the diff. I don't know how that girl would react to a farted nine year old saying I had a one knot style with a 26 year old. I think what's gross like literally is when the older guy marries the 20 year old.

So I don't think Charlize is marrying and destroying and being gross there. Of course not. So like I think that's the diff. I think just banging like like I don't, I think Leonardo DiCaprio and how he conducts his personal life is 100% on the level, fantastic. Yeah, great. You catch a new release, you bang her until she's what, 28?

25, fucking 28, disgusting. Geriatric. So I know what you're saying, there is a double standard cause they go, ew. But it's like a double, reverse double standard. You know what I mean? It's not even a... Yeah, so like...

You know why? Because fucking an older guy to a younger girl is gross. Because I can picture what that body looks like. She's smoke, she's still smoking. Charlize. Charlize? Yeah, of course. She looks great. Her body's, her fate, everything's together.

Okay. So her fucking a 20 something I see what this is now like yeah Like everybody's saying like whatever and I was like Like I fucked this guy he's like 26. I was like, yes, I like it was fantastic and then the other girl I love that. I love that for you. I love that for you. Yeah, I figure that out It's like do you you know what? I'm sex positive like this thing is like all this sex shaming Yeah, it's like so like whatever it's like fuck you want to fuck

Yeah, like if you enjoy it like good for you and body positive everything positive. Yeah, do you give that same speech to a guy? No, because here's why I'll tell you why because historically men have been able to do that without being shamed No, I I know what I'm saying. So it's new for women. It's new Is it new? No, no, no, no, hold on. Hold on. I'm just saying it's new for us to be able to just say it out loud Hey, I'm 40 something I banged it 20 world like Madonna is very open Her boyfriend is doing that for fucking 30 years. She's also a pariah for it people call her Oh, she's a fucking whore and this and that like she's a whore But she's been yeah labeled that sure sure sure a slut But one thing that does make me it that does repulse me is how girls talk like this when she's like, yeah

Yeah, I was like, here's the thing, I want them to keep the same energy when they see this video. I'm Ryan and study shows that if you're an ass guy, you're more likely to be more faithful to a woman than if you're a titty guy. Don't believe me, look it up. Yeah, I've heard that. So ladies, you need an ass man.

He's right. See, I just want them to have Ryan on and be like, yes. Oh my God, yes, Ryan. Ryan, we've heard you're an ass man, but I wish I could, I can't get with a Ryan. I'm not an ass girl. I would love to be.

I'm Ryan, and to be honest, I just need some head before bed. Yeah. And you know what? You know what she's going to say? Dude, absolutely. Absolutely, Ryan. Yes, you do, girl.

I'm so happy you figured that out. I'm so happy for you. Good for you because so many men are don't know what they like and you're aware of your sexuality. Oh, my God. I think this is why my audience is a Male you think so? Well, you know, I've always wonder I'm like why don't the girls you know? I'm not one of these female comics that attracts exclusively a female audience

I think a lot of it is because I'm not as Like this I honestly I'm not I wish I were a little more girly. I really do. I think I'm fucked up I'm fucked in the head. Well, you know what? We're going to get a full fucking review of that pretty soon. I know. It's not that I don't like women. I love them. I love them. Before we break though. I'm just fucking traumatized. We have to bring this up. Oh yeah. You saw Sinners. Holy shit. Did I fucking see Sinners,

bro? Do it, Eni. I'm dying. Yeah, just listen to the fucking movie. They do it fucking 27 times, bro. Mm-hmm. For no reason. They'd just be driving in the fucking car. I gotta tell you this. You fucking ruined that movie for me.

Yeah, you fucking ruined it. The movie ruined itself. No. You ruined it. No. I started watching it, and Tommy, didn't I say it when we started watching it? I watched it again. And he fucking destroyed started watching it? I watched it again.

And he fucking destroyed this for me. I watched it again. Fucking dick. I saw it in theaters and then it was on, you know, available to stream or whatever so I watched it with Christina. And I was like, you're gonna like this movie. You're gonna like the way I look. And like opening, I don't know, two minutes in and I'm hearing Eni's bullshit, right? Me too.

I'm hearing his bullshit. And then like two minutes in I'm hearing any bullshit And then like two minutes in it's like you see this shot and then you know the field and then you hear No, and they're picking cotton yeah, so I'm like oh fucking As soon as I saw them This again bro, what's bro? Oh my God. Well it's not this, I mean the story is an original story. No, no, no. Yes it is.

No, it's the same fucking thing. It's not. It's an original take. It is an original story. People are bad, oh my God. No, no, no, no, let me tell you. The black people win. Let me tell you what, here's my, I love the story.

I still love the movie, I saw it again. I think it's fantastic. The scene that troubles you, Eni, I actually thought was beautifully done. She really liked that scene. I really liked that scene. The music scene, the one that you didn't like. Fantastic. That was just one of the scenes I didn't like. You can point out like 75s.

And I'll tell you who I loved is the door guy. Yeah. Cornbread? Or more? Cornbread. I thought he was so funny when he goes. Wait, you think all the actors are bad too? Cornbread's amazing. Huh? You don't think the actors are bad? I love the actors. No, I didn't say that.

I know, that's what I'm saying. I love Cormoran Fox. Yeah. And he goes, I like when they're like, where have you been? He's like, it turns out I had to take a shit too. I was laughing so hard. Yeah, that was great.

He's got great timing and his face is great to watch. And Michael B. Jordan's great. Fantastic. He's a great actor. The whole cast crushed. And it was so beautiful. The music was incredible. He's a great actor. Fantastic, the whole cast crushed. And it was so beautiful, the music was incredible, the story's great.

Now here's my only, it was a tad long, and I do think they wrote two movies in one. Do you know what I mean? I think the movie went here, and then they're like, but we also wanna do something different. And that's where I kinda, I had to watch it in two sittings, but I watched it, and I loved it. I enjoyed it. I loved it. I like

That and he doesn't like it though. I do too. Wait. So why did you hate it again? Let it refresh why I mean first I'm just I'm tired of the shit On the fucking cotton My god, bro, can we cut the? And then and then the most I'd say maybe the most annoying part is you're right. It's like two fucking movies in one. So like halfway in the movie, they're like, oh, yeah, this is a fucking vampire movie. We should probably do that. Right. OK, let's do that.

And then they do that. Yeah, they do that. And the fucking the graphics, the like, bro, we're in 2025. It should it should have looked crazy. You know, I should have been scared we're in 2025. It should've looked crazy. I should've been scared. I was scared, I thought it was good. It was not, it looked like fucking thriller. It looked like music video thriller with the red lame eyes, it was horrible.

I loved it, I loved the brothers, smoke and stack. I love that. I only feel like I'm not allowed to argue with you about this because you're black. And that's the only reason. I know, and it's the only reason I know and it's a slavery themed thing It's not slavery though No, but it's in the time of and and it's a time when black people don't have power and right

It's like the 1930s or something. It was like right after slavery I know but it still makes me sad I don't like to say it But somehow they still have the fucking cotton fields. But you know what I did like too? Asian people with southern accents. That was cool. That was fun. You never see that. Yeah. I liked that. I liked it. I really did like it.

I thought it was super entertaining. I also thought that the Asian girl being like, come on! Like that bullshit, that was stupid. That didn't make any sense. What do you mean? Come on. The fucking, you know, I don't want to. Yes, it does. When she's like, I that part actually was very pivotal for me. And I like that because that brother had to make a decision right there. And she was right. That brother brother again.

The brother. What do you the moment? I think I think you're a friend in the moment where she says to the brother that's oh Okay, the twin brothers. I thought you meant like the brother the brother the You know the brother with the hat and then this This other female. Oh, yeah, that's super black too. That's super black, they say females. When a female, and I was in my vehicle. My vehicle.

Yeah. Yeah. Tommy, look at the TV. Look at the TV. They say look at the TV. Where you stay at? No, no, no, I meant literally the relations. He had to make a choice, and that was a really cool moment

where she snaps him into making a choice. I thought that was interesting. Wait, snaps him into making a choice? You understand, like he's got to make a choice and that was a really cool moment where she snaps him into making a choice I thought that was interesting. Wait snaps him. You understand like he's he's got to make a choice right there No, but but she's the one who was like they only could you know come in because she at the end was like Yes, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes, because she was like, let's get this shit done. You got to invite him in let's fucking go bro Um, she's a catalyst. I liked it. Listen, Eni, I agree with you. I don't like- Can I tell you this, though? I don't like the slavery theme.

I get sad. I wish it weren't the theme. I'm just tired of it, man. I gotta tell you something, though, that is great. That is great about it. This is the entire point of art, whether it's a movie, a song, a paint. It is supposed to do this.

No, I mean, like that- It's polarizing. Polarizing is good, man. It really is. Like having a, like opposing views on it. This is the fun of movies and music and art. This is a lovely segue into my painting that is still for sale. Fuck around and find out.

I'm now going to, because it hasn't sold for 30 grand, I am now increasing the price to 40 grand. Nice, 40,000. Fuck around and find out. Yep. I'm now going to because it hasn't sold for 30 grand. I am now increasing the price to 40 grand. Nice. Fuck around and find out 40,000 US American dollars. There it is still for sale. Yep. Going up to 40 though. Also, I would like to point out, you may buy my lipsticks, ChristinaP.com. I have four beautiful shades, beautiful shades. How do you like that? Buy them on my website. I'm wearing the shades, beautiful shades. How you like that? Buy them on my website.

I'm wearing the perfect red right now. You're gonna like the way. That means something different to guys like Hitler. Okay. So. This is why you're fucking poor. This is why you're fucking poor. This is the original for sale, by the way.

But by my own little pause, I did this, okay? And I'm working on a wonderful piece of Tom right now. Can't wait. It's been, I'm learning how to do it, and I can't wait to reveal my next creation. Can't wait. Do you realize the Russians think we're all faggots? It's true.

Let's take a quick break, and when we come back, here's what we're doing. We had discussed this on a previous episode, and so we're doing it. We had the entire staff, including ourselves, take psych evaluations, do full written tests, and we are having an expert in the psychology field come in and review how we all did, give her full assessment. Are any of us on the anti-social personality disorder chart?

Are we looking at personality disorders in general in this place? Are people perhaps narcissistic or any number of things? So she's gonna come in and give us the review and all I was told is that she got everybody's and she has a few things to say. That's what I've been told. Josh, what did you say you told me when I came in?

That she's very, very surprised by the results, very fascinated by everything that's come through. She has full reports on everyone. Yeah. Wait, all right. Let's take a quick break and we'll be right back. Take my meds. Still aroused? You have no idea.

And we are back and joining us is Dr. Hope Torres, a licensed professional mental health counselor. And we brought her in for reasons that we previously mentioned. Everybody on staff has done written tests for an evaluation and Dr. Torres, you're here to bring us the results. Yes. So first of all, I think everybody participated,

which was very nice. Yes, 16. 16 people participated. So my question for you you having done this many times and looking at this is there's a wide spectrum of results I'm assuming Yeah, yeah, it's people are low-end There's not a lot of concern and you got some that we it's called clinically significant They've got certain indicators that would tell them they probably need to go to counseling. Probably need to go to counseling. Medicated maybe? Medicines too? Maybe not that, but that

gets determined over time. So it's concerning to the point where they need to be talking to somebody to untangle whatever wires are crossed at the moment? Yeah, and to sort through whatever they've gone through. Are some wires uncrossable on our staff? That's hard to tell unless you actually sit in sessions with them. Yeah, that makes sense. So just so the audience gets a better grasp of what we did, could you explain the test that people took? Yeah, it's pretty much, it's called

Personal Personality Inventory for DSM-5. So it's called PID-5-S SF. So what it does is it gives a list of personality characteristics such as Depression anxiety and list goes on and then it also gives your personality disorders, but it's not a diagnosis So it gives us symptoms that you have that puts you in certain categories for risk but something for us to assess if we're going to, what we're gonna dig into in therapy to sort out, excuse my language, bullshit,

of what you've gone through versus if you actually have personality disorder. And just to, I just want to inform the audience, make that a little bigger for me, because I'm old, just to give people an idea of like some of the questions. A hundred questions. Right.

So just leave it there. People, you know, some of the questions are like, I feel like I act totally on impulse. And then the person taking the test would either say that that's a very false statement, a somewhat false statement, a sometimes true statement, or a very true statement. And so over the course of these 100 questions, you're answering questions like that with an answer of one of those four answers essentially. And the combination of all these gives you an assessment.

Yes, and like I said, it categorizes, but it measures everything on different scales. I typed into a program, it calculates it. Got it. So it shows different types of scales that you're on, what we pay attention to if you have high anxiety, if you have attachment, if you disengage people too much. So it shows, well, example, I can sometimes see

where people might actually have ADHD on it for certain things. You can tell see where people might actually have ADHD on it for certain things. You can tell sometimes where people might possibly have forms of trauma, just because certain traits are elevated. I'll tell you this, this is kind of an interesting thing, that not that it's completely different from the rest of society, but I think we do find in our world, in the comedy world, a lot of anxiety, depression, disassociation,

there's a lot of mental health issues in the comedy world. And in showbiz in general. In general, yeah, but if you hang out in the hallway of the comedy store, it's like a fucking mental asylum. I would enjoy standing there. No, but I can get that just because one thing I've learned is, you know, laughter hides it, you know? I've come from a life that's got a lot of trauma in it.

So I understand laughter. I used it a lot just to get through. Now, let me ask you this question to define terms for the audience and for myself. What is a personality disorder? It's an alteration in the individual. It's gonna be specific traits that, let me find the best wording for it.

It impacts their functioning more than just anxiety. It drives them to, sorry, I do have ADHD, so my mind will have its moments. It's all good? No, but it drives an individual to be different. They're going to be eccentric at different times. It's going to be things that it's very hard for them to manage. It's things medication cannot manage. Gotcha. And they're going to engage in the world differently. They're going to see the world. It's going to be an altered perspective.

And to give a further example, for instance, to the to the audience, you know, an example of a personality disorder would be like histrionic. Yes, there's histrionic borderline personality disorder, anti-social. And these are all different. Very different. Like they vary to degrees. Right. And, and there's things that jump out about somebody that makes you go, oh, they're they they vary to degrees right and and there's things that jump out about Somebody that makes you go. Oh there at least before you can spend a lot of time there may be on this Yes, in this falling under this category. Yeah, you're gonna see like borderline personality disorder there The way they see things is very skewed, you know, they fear abandonment Yeah, things are black and white good Good and bad, angels and demons. There's no gray area. They can be loving to you one moment,

and the next moment they absolutely hate you. You know, you're gonna have narcissistic personality disorder. It's very hard to get that because people don't admit they have it. Oh right, because a narcissist won't go. Exactly. I'm a narcissist.

No, so you have to almost discover that through sessions if they go to therapy. So it's one of the lower reported ones. They're not gonna go to therapy. Because they're not gonna go, exactly. And borderlines too, don't they not? Or rather, I've heard that they're so exhausting to treat that most therapists don't wanna engage.

Like they can only. Yes, I've had a few borderlines they're very hard to stay with. Some of the thing that's very difficult about borderline is it's workable, it's manageable to live life when it develops in adulthood. But when it develops in their teenage years, the outcome's not as good for them because it's part of their development. It's in the development of their brain, it's in the development of their behaviors. And one of the things with borderline is the higher suicide rate.

And it's all a part of it. And bipolar too, yeah? Yeah, so the one thing is bipolar can also be mixed up or misdiagnosed or borderline and bipolar can be misdiagnosed for each other. So that's why this assessment gives you the indicators. So you have to sort out what it really is. That's interesting, but bipolar can be medicated.

Yes, because you're treating symptoms. Can you tell me, to begin, let's start with who's doing okay. Can you guess who is the first person? I don't know. Hold on, hold on. I'm gonna go Tyler. No. No shit, still waters run deep.

No, no, he ain't the top. Zolo? Zolo. Zolo's good boy. What? So you have things that gauge average, they gauge elevated, and they gauge clinically significant. None of his register, they register below average

or right above average. Wow, Josh, your parents did good. If you were to go to the personality disorder, the only two above average is antisocial with psychopathy and narcissism. Oh, I know that. But that's just. That's it, it's just, those are, so the front of the page.

Yeah. You're describing the test still. so our buddy Zolo doesn't have psychopathy narcissism No, well, he's got this is the average scale. So he's below average on everything. So this is the personality traits. Right? Now he's doing real well. Somebody needs to marry him This is like what the next sheet looks like for the results. Got it, okay. So he's on this scale. Good job, Josh. So he did great.

He did really good and that's his personality disorder one. Okay. Wow. So he did really good. Second would be Tyler. Tyler. Hey, that's good. Yep, and then Tyler scored higher on his negative affectivity.

That's gonna be more anxiety driven. Sure, I can see that. And for his personality disorder, he was above average, close to elevated with narcissism. Okay. Wow. But people are hearing that and hearing, oh, this person may be a narcissist. And it's not really that.

It's just showing me that, hey, you've got some things that put you up in this thing of, I think about myself in certain ways. You know the thing about him? He always wears shorts. Cause he's always trying to show off his legs. He's clinically significant. He's always trying to show his legs off.

He's clinically significant and attention seeking. So I'd be seeing why. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Clinically significant and attention seeking. so I'd be seeing why. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Clinically significant and attention seeking. Clinically significant in rigid perfectionism. I love that, that's why he's so good at his job. Well, he is a photographer, he's a fantastic photographer. Good for him.

And clinically significant in separation and security. Might have attachment issues. Okay, he loves his hair too, it's really crazy. He might be attached to it. My father was, he traveled with a curl brush with his. Oh, that's attached to it. Yeah, my father was he traveled with a curl brush with this Oh, that's Tyler all day. Yeah, it was horrible hair spray. He has curlers all the time. He's high anxiety though That makes sense. I think a lot of us do on this stuff. Yeah now that was one two three four five Number six

Who'd you guys think was the craziest? Gamba. I thought... Oh no, you thought... okay. Who's the craziest? Any, any. Last time you guys said any? I thought it was any. I think it's any. No.

No. He's in the top six of being the lowest. Wow. Shut the fuck up. But we have to point something out here. That really smart, conniving, narcissistic psychopaths will manipulate these tests to what they appear to be. I wondered about that. Yes.

I wondered about that, because y'all's last episode, he said he was gonna gaslight the therapist. That's right. That's right, she watched it. So I was ready and prepared. That was AI, that wasn't me. Cause I think Any fudged his answers.

I think he would lie on the test. Well, he did well. He did well. He is. Way to go, Eni. That's impossible. That is fucking impossible. Here's what I will say, here's what I will say.

I think if I took this test literally like three months ago, it'd be very different. I did that TMS shit, right? Yeah. And so I think honestly, fuck, yo, it changed me. Are you medicated too? Are you on meds? No, I actually stopped my miss

I was on I was on some crazy shit. Well, I stopped it because of you did say something We had a small chat before and one of the things you said was this you know Depends the day you take this test which makes sense. You can have bad mood and you can relate in the moment Yes, you know like You can go and you even mentioned, you know, it can be either, do you decipher between professional and personal? You know, on what's what.

I felt like it was, I was making it for the audience to know. I was like, you know, one of the questions was like, are you attention seeking? And I was like thinking about my normal everyday thing of like, I don't like attention when I walk into any room. And then I go, but it's disingenuous for me as a performer to say I don't like attention when I walk into any room and then I go but it's Disingenuous for me as a performer to say I don't like attention because when I'm on stage, I certainly want your attention Yeah, so things like that right where you kind of go. How do I answer this? Yeah, and you got like the histrionic personality disorder where there is attention seeking. There is manipulation, you know, especially in the sense of

Using their body for attention. You know, trying to the flirtation and everything, you know. And yeah, and I've actually got questions for you in a bit. Oh, it's going to be awesome. Okay. Any unreal. He was clinically significant in disinhibition, which means he is orientated

toward immediate gratification. Individuals scoring high on this can be easily distracted, may act on impulse and have difficulty with responsibility and commitment. Yeah, of course. He's nodding. He was high on, he was above average on schizotypal, which is just very eccentric person

and anti-social with psychopathy. Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, what the fuck happened? I thought we all was like number fucking three, what the hell happened? That's a scam, but that's the number six. Number six. What the fuck happened? Which means he's characterized by callousness. What?

Deceitfulness. Yes. Impulsivity, irresponsibility, manipulative, risk-taking, attention-seeking, and low levels of anxiety and withdrawal. So what would his personality disorder be if he were to lean into one? Antisocial with psychopathy.

Yeah, this is, hold on. But he still's it's above Average but not not significant that would make me go ding ding ding. He needs therapy. There you go Why that's a positive that's a positive result any okay any you don't need therapy Don't need therapy. Okay, so You know a little concerning Okay, so those words were a little concerning. There were a lot of crazy words out there. Well, if you do want to...

What'd kill people? But if you do want to gasoline a therapist, you do want attention from the therapist. I have a question, Dr. Hope. What about ADHD? Does he lean towards that? Because he said that himself. I'm ADHD, I'm ADHD. And I wonder if he really is.

If you look towards distractability. Yeah, that was my number one thing, right? Yes. Eccentric, just kind of like off the wall thoughts and experiences, withdrawal, separation, insecurity would be part of that, but his anxiety kind of takes that down a little bit.

But the thing is, is ADHD also looks different for everybody, and it looks different, especially for men and women. You know, like I struggled with ADHD as a kid, but never knew it until I became a therapist. And I was like, oh crap, I've had it. But now that I'm in perimenopause, it actually impacts my ADHD even more.

Cool. So it increases it. Fuck, what am I doing here? Awesome. God, life is horrible. Life is fun. Yeah. Okay, so let's move along to...

I'm dying to, I'm shaking, I'm so excited. Yeah, we're so excited. I'm sweating. So I will give you... God, I love this. Hang on, I'm still sorting through them. So I can't believe you made top six healthiest, Annie. He did.

I am flabbering. And that means everyone else is absolutely nuts. Let me ask you before you say this next thing. Yes. Are there any like red flag people on this? Of course. Yes, and I wanna challenge them, but they're not here. Okay, well let's go.

Multiple people or just one? Let's save the top three. I don't know what they are yet. That's amazing. I guess I should just ask, let's just get right to it. What's going on between, yeah, you go. Starting at where you get elevated and clinically, where things are just higher is Garrett.

So Garrett is high in negative affectivity. He is clinically significant in that and elevated in disinhibition, which means he is high in anxiety, high in separate separation anxiety, high in emotional ability. He's high in anhedonia and that... He's depressed as fuck. Well you know those guys are in edit bays that's fine. Yeah that makes sense. High distractibility, high impulsivity. Good. Eccentricity. I like it. And this is where the personality disorders out of seven, five started to five or above average. The one that goes into clinically significant is borderline personality

disorder. You think it's a borderline? Male borderlines are very rare aren't they? Usually it's women. Yeah it's usually women in that. Wow. I like that. Congratulations, Garrett. What brings him into that is his anxiety, emotional liability, impulsivity, risk-taking, and separation and security. Wow. Okay, that's good. Very cool. That's fine.

Good job, Garrett. He's a great editor, though. Yeah. It all works in his favor. Who's next? Caitlin. I love Caitlin. Caitlin.

Caitlin glows clinically significant into negative affectivity and psychoticism. And that was pretty much from anxiety, emotional liability, or lability, eccentricity, perceptual dysregulation and unusual beliefs. Yeah. Which brings her into

Five of the seven or above average Borderline is elevated so we would consider that and a click Clinically significant is schizo tipple. Okay, does this mean very eccentric? Oh cool So I'll give you a purse let me give you example here. I've got like there's so many examples Schizo schizo typical schizo tipple schizo So you have yeah, it's tipple tipple just the way it's pronounced this personality disorder So yeah, I've got so much information It's ridiculous and my mind can't remember every single thing.

Pervasive pattern of social and interpersonal deficits. Yes. Discomfort with and reduced capacity for close relationships as well as cogs. Yeah, this is me too. I mean, what are you telling me? Everybody is eccentric. Yeah. But I think being in the field that y'all are, you have to have an oddity. Here's the thing. Kailin's funny and I think I would not want her to get treatment.

No, no, no, no. Because I like that she has great ideas. She's done some of the funniest videos here for us. So please don't get help. No, but see like an example of schizo tipple is back to the future, the professor. Oh yeah, yes. Caddyshack, Bill Murray in it.

Yes! So that's more, that's what the schizo-tiple is, just odd. Okay. That's so cool. Stand out type of thing. That's why I like her. Next is Cougar. Oh, Cougar's right there. Right after that, yeah.

Clinically significant in antagonism. Hey! Means you can be a jerk. Yeah. Disinhibition. So, he scored high for deceitfulness. Wow. Grandiosity. Wow.

Wow. Thinks very highly of himself. And manipulative. Wow. Cougar. Yeah. Cougar, how do you feel about that? Cougar needs to see therapy.

Congratulations, Cougar. That's awesome, Cougar. Yeah. Cougar, how do you feel about that? Cougar needs to see therapy. Congratulations, Cougar. That's awesome, Cougar. Good for you. I'm so happy to hear that. Wow. Oh, Cougar. Dude, you scored so high.

Congratulations. Every personality disorder goes up. He is highest in antisocial. Antisocial with psychopathy. And the highest is narcissism. Cougar, this is a revelation to all of us. This is very exciting. Also Cougar's very good at his job too. So I would recommend not seeking therapy because whatever you're doing is working for us.

Yeah. And here's the thing, if you want to stay here, you stay how you are. Yeah. Don't change. So Cougar started the thing. If you want to stay here, you stay how you are. Yeah. Yeah, don't change. So Cougar started the top five. He starts the top five. Yeah. And so number four, and I met her, Heather.

What? I would have thought she's the most normal. They get you. Where is she? They get you. Y'all don't see her when you leave, man. I'm not going to say what vehicle I drove in. I don't want my tires slashed. Holy shit. They get you. They get you. Y'all don't see her when you leave, man. Yeah. I'm not gonna say what vehicle I drove in. I don't want my tires slashed.

Holy shit. So. Yeah. No, she's not that bad. So. But she's elevated in antagonism. Really? I don't see that.

Clinically significant in disinhibition and psychoticism. Wow. And she did start scoring high on her personality disorder. Wow. So, Heather, here's Heather right here. She's a winner. I love it. Good job, Heather.

She's very talented, very smart. She's amazing. But this is awesome. She's elevated in antisocial with psychopathy. Yes! Well, here she is here. Do you have anything, Doctor, that you'd like to ask Heather? Well I guess once I look at narcissism being clinically significant. Wow. How do you think

about yourself? I don't know I just felt like I answered it like first gut I was like yeah sometimes I do that or think that way but I never would have thought. With attention seeking, what are ways you'd say like to seek attention? Performing, you know, shake. Oh, what kind of what do you do? I play keys and sing. That'd be the only way for attention seeking. And in my work, she does butthole videos on OnlyFam. I was I was going there I

Just try to be good at everything I do so that I can get so I asked you a normal therapy question Do you have a close relationship with your parents? Not super close Who's closer mom mom? Was dad around a lot or was he emotionally detached? Probably emotionally detached. Have you had struggle with dating off and on? No. Do you get attached very quickly? I mean I don't have much to compare it to. I've been married for seven years so. How old are you? 29. Oh okay so you're young. 29. Oh, okay. So you're young. So did you date in high school? Mmm, just like casually. If you were to rate on self-esteem on a scale of 1 to 10, one being pissed poor, don't want to think of yourself, 10 is I am the utmost, most amazing thing God created. Seven.

That's pretty average. What would you think of your relationship with your husband? I think it's pretty good. Hmm. We enjoy each other's company a lot and have, I think, a good emotional balance. Okay. I won't go too deep into her on that. Okay. Yeah.

Well, I will say Heather is very pleasant to be around and just such talented darling. But what's her personality disorder? It would be a narcissism. Wow. Wow. So she was high on attention seeking. Now the one thing with therapy, you know is you know It's been described to never is that you have to do random questions

Like I ask I ask questions and I think of it like a spiderweb It's never always a straight sequence I jump around to see everything that's connected because I'll look at things like this and I kind of look at it like a Spiderweb the core issues at the center of it and all of the rings around it are the different behaviors that developed off of it. And somehow they're all interconnected. And therapy usually hits the outside to knock it down.

But what happens is that behavior rebuilds but in a different way. So if you don't get at the core, you're not gonna dismantle it. So that's why my questions were kind of bouncing around what I was asking with her. So it is very normal that if you have narcissism in the family, certain behaviors are gonna be passed on

generationally. Yeah, you'll inherit. And so like distractibility, clinically high on. Wow. Eccentricity. Nice. Grandiosity. Nice. Irresponsibility. Nice irresponsibility perceptual dysregulation

unusual beliefs separation insecurity and rigid perfectionism well you know I know something Heather I think you're also you are where you belong yeah oh I met her she's just she just felt like a saint she's the best. Yeah, I loved her. I just love her vibes. Don't change. Who, um, who's next? Top three. Top three. Gamba. So. Jesus Christ.

By the way, I love Heather's tattoos on her body. Oh, she's the coolest. Yeah, she's the coolest. I love Gamba too. Gamba is one of our editors. I'll just say this. From somebody who like, you know, I come in and out of the office, I see him with some frequency,

troubling, troubling individual. Oh my God. I was wondering. Yeah. We need to talk. I have openings next week. I even do weekends, seven days a week. Yeah.

Wow. I will talk at eight o'clock at night if you need to. I'll skip. Oh, there he is. There he is. Wow. I will talk at eight o'clock at night if you need to. I'll skip. Oh, there he is. There he is. I'll skip the gym for Gamba. You need help, my friend. Yeah, what's happening?

You gotta sigh, dude. Once I got to these top three, like it described in the lobby, I had a mental heart on. Because this would be amazing to dive into. So, Gamba, he threw up some flags? Yeah. So, the personality domain for psychoticism,

antagonism, disinhibition. Whoa! Whoa, you're off the chart, so you're literally off the chart. I tell you another thing too, as a non-professional, is that he has that great quality of a, like a, kind of like a troubling individual who doesn't realize that they are that way.

You know what I mean? Like he has such a pleasant demeanor walking in, but you're like, you're fucking crazy, right? Oh, he's probably just used to living in it. Yeah. It's just part of who he is. Yeah. It's just, it'll be part of his childhood development.

What is the personality disorder that is most likely in him? It's hard to determine. I think it's schizoid. Some schizoid stuff. He's definitely removed from reality. Holy shit! Holy shit! Oh my god.

All of them? All of them. All of them. The top two are Schizo-tipple, which we're not gonna say is a big thing. But anti-social. Definitely. And borderline. Wow. Nice. How's it feel, Gamba? I don't feel good right now.

You don't? No. But see, that's a healthy response. And so I guess the question is, did you have a good childhood? No. Yeah. Like I love my parents. Like I get along with them. Oh, you're fucked. Did you have some form of trauma when you were a kid?

I mean, I can't get into it. Nope. I'm not going gonna get into the trauma then. That already tells my mind in the direction I would go. Okay. Um, so there's levels of trauma. Now borderline, a lot of people will say borderline comes from trauma and it doesn't. Really? No, not all the time.

Where does it come from? Wires? It can be just developed, yes. Yeah. It can be developed. It can be from, but that's kind of in the low percentage Of it, but this also tells me that there's that's why I asked on the trauma because if there is trauma He's gonna have a lot of these behaviors that Attention seeking is across the board, you know deceitfulness hostage hostility

Manipulative risk-taking sometimes like I said out there risk-taking comes for some people because they're trying to stay in reality, right? You know, do you ever feel like there's times you disassociate or you disengage when things get highly stressful or confrontational? It happened a second ago right now But he is a sweetheart though. He's the best. And some people can cheat like that. But also too, because I dissociated for many years before I knew that's what I was doing. Can you describe what that means?

What happens? How it feels. This is how I explain to my people. I don't use the word client because I hate that word. It's so detached. So I use people. The way I describe trauma to my people is when we're born,

the right side of our brain comes right online into the world baby starts to learn their behaviors, you know They start to learn emotions. This is where our trauma responses develop Then you got the left side of the brain that starts to develop over time Which is our normalcy of life our key time is our adolescent years 12 to 16 That's also the key time our prefrontal cortex, or I call our adult mind, starts to develop. So our normalcy of life is his normalcy will be different than my normalcy. Y'all's normalcy are also gonna be different. If you have a healthy home, there's a proper balance and communication between all of them, all three of them. But if you have trauma, on the left side is where you start to

develop the behaviors to exist within that trauma I watched an episode from two years ago I'm gonna sound like a creeper now when your mom came to visit. Mm-hmm. You guys were in Miami or Yeah, you know, but then I watched the next day episode or the next episode and The way you're talking about the way you grew up with your mom. I get it. I don't talk to my mother You know, so what happens is you start to develop behaviors to live within that world Because this becomes the good child Because if dad's a drunk, I know I have to go in my room and hide and ain't gonna beat me

Yeah, so we start to develop this is where you're gonna find the dissociation in everything because it's like if I disengage, I won't get hurt. But then what happens is the other side is where we have our emotions, we can have a dysregulation of emotions because everything gets put away. This becomes the bad child. And I kind of tell people, remember in history, the timeline, and you had to put the dot and the events that happened in time. So if you have the Civil War, the emotions and experiences that happened in that time started developed in that time. Everybody grew off of that. It's the same thing with our behaviors. Say if you're six years old, and you get assaulted.

Well an emotion develops in that time. So when you're an adult and you're having certain experiences, remember, you didn't go through that a child went through that. So it's a child's emotion that gets developed in that time that never properly got to grow. So I tell people you didn't go through the trauma a child did. So what happens is think of a hallway. And every child part that got developed, each emotion that got developed in time kind of gets put away in the room and they're not allowed to come up.

But when they come out, we don't know how to handle them because we never learned to regulate them. Because they were bad, they got us in trouble, they got us beat, they got us everything back. So there's no proper communication because the prefrontal cortex, the adult mind, is supposed to calm everybody and regulate everybody. You know, your decision making, your rationalization and all of that. On the Hawaii episode, did you see what a gas lighting manipulator my mother is? I could see certain things, yeah.

But I could see how you learned how to engage that by acting as if that didn't exist. And then she becomes kind of like your rescue. Because she sees it, because I know it's probably a reflection of your mom, but you kind of go back and you become his protector. Because I could see a recoil in you, but then when everybody answered,

I watched everybody's posture back there. And I'm wondering, I can't see, because I'm part midget, I can't see either there I can see their heads Raise your hand if one of you if any of y'all felt like a recoil a child recoil Going against somebody older than you were an adult None of you. Well, I think I they don't know so so when you when he asked when you guys were doing the burping thing Or no your beard you're cut you're talking about your beard what looked better because you had shaved. Oh, right, right, right This is an old episode. Yeah two years ago. Yeah, I'm kind of weird. Let me talk about Hawaii

I want to talk about Hawaii. She kept doing it. She kept doing it. Yes So you had shaved and there was the first time in like 15 years you said yeah Yeah, so you shaved and you had stubble and she was trying to say no, no, no, go back and you were like, alright, let me ask the guys and she said no, no, they're gonna give you the answer that you want because you're the boss. But I kind of saw, yeah, not everybody relaxed, you know, answering not in the way she thought. Well, what I remember most about, like what comes to me about that episode was the thing where I remember she was saying she wanted me to buy something for her on that trip. The necklace.

The necklace. And what I did, I was like, yeah, I wasn't like volunteering. She was, yeah, you did. And we brought my sister in. And she was like, I can't lie. And then my mom was like, how much did he pay you? Like she. She can't believe that You know type of thing. Yeah, but I guess when you guys had to give what his beard look like

Did you feel awkward going against her? No, no not me personally No, okay cuz I saw tense yeah, maybe they against her. No? OK, because I saw tense. Yeah, maybe they were. I mean, it was probably tense because they saw someone wanting to kill their mother. Yeah, that could be it too. Yeah, she's the worst.

But I mean, and that's where I'm trying to go is like, sometimes there's like a child recoil. Yeah, of course. You had it. You know, it was like, this is mom. And it's like, no matter how old we get, there's still that part of us that resource to that. well I guess with Gamba well no he already dissociated so that already tells me now are you being honest that you dissociated or you BS

and me? No I was being honest but I'm back in. Okay so dissociation let me ask you this when you dissociate what does that feel like to you do you just space out or do you kind of go numb? I kind of like like some words come in but I'm really I don't know like I'm in my head. Okay. So what that tells me is when we talk about child parts, those trauma parts, something got engaged saying you got too close too quick. And so now that's the defense mechanism. Would you say that would be fair? Yeah. Okay. And so that's how you deal with trauma. But if there is something like that from the heart, I think it would probably one day get to that point

to process stuff. It won't take away from the job you do, but it'll help you have your perspective kind of cleared up. Okay, so Gamba and Gamba only can go to therapy. Yeah, Gamba's allowed. Gamba only can go to therapy. Yeah. Gamba's allowed. Gamba, I think we do. Who's next on the red flag list?

Cause we have, we're at the top two. By the way, I'm on, I'm over here like freaking out, wondering. What y'all are on? Yeah. This is number two we were about to do? Yes. Okay, who is number two?

Niana. What? Thank you for talking with me. Gamba. Thanks, Gamba. Thank you, Gamba. Good therapy. Niana. There she is. Lover. It's my girl right there. So the only one she was not elevated on was antagonism. Oh yeah. But everything else she was. Everything else she was.

You broke the scale. Holy shit. Holy shit. Yeah, she's up there. Damn girl. So high achiever, buddy. For a high in clinically significant and negative effectivity. Sure. What does that mean?

What does that mean for, like what does negative effectivity mean? The way they see the world, very negative, very anxious. Okay. You know, suspicious of it. Okay. Then the psychoticism, very anxious. Okay. You know, suspicious of it. Okay. Then the psychoticism and disinhibition. Okay.

Now, she had the emotional ability, it can fluctuate. Lability means changeability, yeah? So that way she can disengage her emotions very quickly. So it's like, have you ever had that out of sight out on mine? Definitely. Do you have ADHD? I've never been diagnosed. Okay But yeah, usually if you have somebody that's very negative

What do you yo-yo back and forth like with attachment with people like you want them close, but you don't want them close Like if they get too close, it's like you got to put the brakes on? Yeah I could see that. But if they try and walk away and ignore you does it suck? Yeah. Okay. And then she's high in eccentricity, perceptual dysregulation, unusual beliefs. Of course aliens, she might talk about it all the time. I'll talk about you with aliens. Distractability, irresponsibility, withdrawal. She's a great employee. Now, she is.

She really is amazing. Also, another one I gotta say. She's so good. Doing a great job. Do not get help. No, no, no, no, no. She would probably, no, no. But she scored high on things.

Pfft. That's up there, elevated. So she's elevated on schizotypal, which is okay. She's elevated on OCD. Oh yeah, of course. She is clinically significant on avoidant. Of course. And creeping into borderline. Oh good

congratulations. You know what though, you got a nice dash of it. That's all you got. She got a good sprinkle of everything. Some seasoning. So have you, who are you closer to in your family? My mom. Your mom? Yeah but we are both emotionally volatile together. Is your mom anxious person? Absolutely. Was there any parentification? 100%. Yeah. Was dad around? Mm-hmm. Yeah, he's a good dad. Okay. But your mom, did she come from a hard life? Yes, definitely. Did she deal with abuse? Yep yeah do you think she was overreactive with you definitely was she a helicopter parent um no I wouldn't say so if you were to talk to her and tell her how you were feeling what would she do um she'd get very defensive make it about her yeah Yeah. Wait, you're talking about my mom or Yana's mom? Yeah, I was talking about Yana's mom.

You guys related? No? Could be. Oh my God. Do you, are you anxious about how people perceive you? Oh yeah, that's all I think about all the time. Aw, baby, we love you. Thank you.

She looks so innocent. She's sweet girl. Yeah, so is she. She looks so innocent. She's sweet girl. Yeah, she's so nice. She really is great. For you, do you panic when people get close to you? Like say, okay, let me reword it. Do you give too much of yourself to people really quick? Oh yeah, probably. Are you quick to end friendships or relationships? Yes.

Hmm. That's borderline shit. You got... So, what is your perception just of your life? Of my life or like of myself? Let's go yourself. I think I'm very anxious and I'm perfectionist that like needs validation So I call I call this a perception filter so When we when I was younger we did something called the grapevine effect, but I guess they'd call it telephone You put people in a line,

you tell the first person a sentence, and then everybody passes it on and whispers. And at the end, you have a totally different sentence. I kind of look at that as that's life. People tell us something, and then all of these people in the middle are the experiences that we've had in life that change our perspective of how we see things.

That's the filter that this truth has to go through. And on the other side is we get a skewed version of that statement. Sure. So sometimes when you have people that have had, especially I have a lot of people that have very anxious mothers, very controlling mothers, emotionally manipulative mothers. You know, it's hard for them to trust people. Do you feel more comfortable with friendships with men or women? Women. Really? Yeah, I think so.

I think here definitely, right? Like at the studio? Yeah, they're cool. By the way, I feel like the same type of mother stuff. Yes, and I definitely feel more at ease with women even like though My mother is like I feel more sometimes people go the opposite to the healthier side So, okay. I guess that was all I could ask for that. Okay. Here's we got Niana don't get help

Okay, we're down to number one. I am so anxious. Please be Christina. Is it Christina, is it Christina, is it Christina? No. But I think this person fudged their test. Wow. Is it me? Did you fucking lie?

No, I'm asking what she said. But I think this person was doing it just to BS or to have fun because if not, so what happened is when I ran this person's test for this assessment, I messaged Zolo and I had to ask if he was a combat veteran. Fuck, Chris Larson? Where's Chris's test by the way?

Wait, so hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Before we get to this, our combat vet who's deeply troubling, can you tell us based on your test who is crazier between me and Christina? Cause that's really what we're- Wait, wait, we're gonna do this first? Yeah, of course.

Cause we know it's not us. You guys are separate from her. So we have to ask. But where do we go on the scale of us? I know, I'm just excited. Almost. Christina. What, where am I?

Christina's crazier. She got more than you. More what? Crazy. Now the suspense starts. So this person, Tanner. Yeah, we knew that. Tanner. So Tanner, just to be clear,

he's our, I think our youngest person. He's a comedian. Like I told you, comedians are very, very- He's out of his fucking mind. He is crazy as shit. So it's either he's really crazy or he was just having fun because if he's young like that,

I think he did it to manipulate it. I think it's a little bit of both. Because um. Wait, can we call him? Yeah. Why don't we get him on the- I'd say that he manipulated the exam. Oh yeah, he's fucking with you.

There's no way. Well let's ask him, let's ask him. By the way- Uh oh. Tanner. What's up? Hey, how are you buddy? I'm good. Where are you today?

We thought you'd be here. Yeah, worry Oh, I'm actually I'm in California right now Okay, you still work here Yeah, yeah, okay so we're going through the psych evaluations and We've run through all of them and she had one that she flagged. She's like, this is the most significant one by far. Did I win? Well, she thought it was somebody who maybe served time in combat.

Whoa! Yeah. And so the real question here with Dr. Hope is, did you manipulate your answers or were you truthful? Like, were you having fun or were you being honest? Be honest, Tanner. Were you goofing? No, I was I was like really locked in for that I like won't like be honest about it because I heard like a professional was gonna analyze it So so you were on it. I think it pretty serious. Okay, so let me make a she's here

This is insane combat vets or bet shit crazy But it's just that it's have you gone from some serious stuff in life crazy. No, I know. But it's just that it's have you gone from some serious stuff in life? Um, I mean other people might think it's serious, but I think it's kind of fun. He lived in a cargo, what is it? A cargo. I lived in a shipping container for like a year and then I... How old are you? 23. Oh, you're still a baby. What's wonderful is he's still in development. Yeah. Brain's not done development until around 25. That frontal lobe is not fully formed?

No, it is. It's between 12 to 16. However, that's the key development, but it's just the way he sees things, the way he sees the world, the way he's processing. It's like, think of your brain slowly getting encased in glass. You can change things, take things out, remove things, but once that glass casing comes in. Then it's it's like think of your brain slowly getting encased in glass and change things take things out remove things

But once that glass casing comes in it's done It's kind of like it's set in and it takes longer to kind of readapt things or change things So Tanner was clinically significant in almost every category. I Showed you that. Yeah. Yeah. Whoa You get We'll get when that. Shit. Yeah. Whoa. It's all like a Navy Seal. You got- Eee. Ah. Um.

We'll get there. One that was in combat. In Afghanistan. Whoa. So you are at like the hundredth percentile for anti-social, anti-social with psychopathy, borderline, narcissistic, and schizo- Tipple.

Tipple. Whoa. Oh my goodness. And above average and avoidant and obsessive compulsive. So it's kind of like what I ask a lot of people. Did you have a good home life? Does this mean I'm gonna be successful? Well, depends how you use it. Okay. Well, we're on the light side of the force, so... So that's good. Yeah, I mean, this is not, um... So that would be avoidant. That's avoidant, right. But he's not, uh... I don't, you know, he's funny.

He says outrageous things, which, by the way, all comedians do. So funny. Absolutely. Very funny. So talented. I wasn't worth anything, but I almost was. There's the full sentence. There we go. I wasn't going that deep with everybody today, but no, but that shows.

It's just that there's probably going to be some stuff there. In the family, was there anybody with anger, alcohol, or drug use? Yeah, yes, yes. It took a while for my parents to tell me about it, but yeah. Okay. Did you grow up where things were unstable or you moved around a lot? Like I was unstable? No, the home was unstable. Did you guys move around a lot? I got a PM. So I mean we moved. I'll be right back.

We're parents. Okay. We're parents home a lot. Um, sometimes like my mom decided to get like a job at one point. So that was kind of cool. That was kind of chunky. What? Getting a job don't count on it.

Yeah. So if he answered truthfully on these, one day I'd definitely say, it doesn't take away from who you are as a person, but it'd be something just to dive into and talk to someone on it. Yeah, so Tanner, would you be open to just going to therapy, like seeing if it does something for you?

Yeah, I mean, that would be something I'd look into. Okay. I for sure have some problems, I do know that. Well, yeah, we all do, buddy. It's not just you. We all do, yeah. Everybody does. I learned, I'm like in like the top of the top,

like I'm special forces retarded. You guys, you guys, you guys, you're not, don't say retarded. Tanner. You got some stuff you dealt, you countered. Tanner, there were 16 evaluations and there was one she put aside where she goes, we really need to discuss this one and that was yours.

That's you, buddy. So when you get back. I'm so proud of myself. Yeah, we'll have some places for you to go, maybe. I'll leave my business card behind. Great, that's great. I think it'd be fun to know exactly which category he ultimately falls into.

Sort through all of it and see. You're not going to make me take meds. No, no, I don't. See, I'm not a psychiatrist. Because the last lady did that and I didn't like her. No, no, no, no, no. I'm not a fan of medicine unless it's absolutely necessary. Like as a supportive device, a supportive, you know, thing. We're just talking some talk therapy, man. as a supportive device, a supportive thing, but other than that. We're just talking some talk therapy, man.

Yeah, no, and I focus on complex trauma, and that's what my doctorate is towards, is trauma, traumatology, so. Well. So I have the brain of a combat veteran. He's really attached to that. You got some trauma that is off the charts for someone, you got numbers that are off the charts for someone your age without having gone through any form of trauma and

For you that I'm not going through trauma. Yeah And so no this just shows that there's something there a lot of things that are there that probably haven't been dealt with Yeah, I know I do a lot of like self-dealing Yep, and so it's just there's just some things that look like they have you sort it out. That's all let's uh, let's get you in a room Bud let's get you a room on a couch Awesome Let's get you in a room, bud. Let's get you in a room on a couch. Awesome. I like the casting couch. Well, if you do want to do therapy, I only do virtual.

OK. And Tanner, therapy doesn't make you less funny, so don't worry about that. It'll actually make you better at stand up. And make you funnier. And what it can do is take a lot of the negatives and they can actually become things you can use to help yourself. Yeah

Yeah, like Don't say combat vet that was a mistake. I'm up No, I was I was just like people turn bad things into good things all the time Oh, and a lot of people will you know there you'll have some therapists that'll do it wrong where they try to take away All of the negative things that you've had, or like all of the child trauma parts. They try and make them go away. Instead of saying let them exist, let them have importance,

because our trauma parts all play a role in our lives. They become pretty much our protectors, but they end up hurting us at the same time. If they're too funky. Yeah, if they're too strong. Too activated. If you think about people that can be they're too strong. Too activated. You know if you think about people that can be self-destructive. Oh yeah. Well that's also a defense mechanism. Oh

I think I'm a little bit of that too. Oh for sure. Yeah. Plus your age, 23. You're such a baby. So you'll see stuff like that. So you know it's just there might be behaviors of distrust, there might be behaviors of you know being avoidant. Let me tell you stuff, but I'm not gonna tell you stuff. Sometimes possibly being passive aggressive when it doesn't need to happen. Tana, we're gonna turn this alarming red flag into a positive, okay?

That's a good thing. Yeah. That's a good thing. It's a great thing, you're fine. You're good, buddy, you're good. We're gonna be great. Safe travels back, don't hurt anybody. Yeah, we miss you Okay, I won't hurt anybody So just monitor his path across the state yeah

Because I looked I was like that or he's a serial killer. That's good Oh, first of all, I'm very upset that you think I'm crazier than Tom. First of all, I'd like to know. Well, you're beautiful by the way. Thank you, babes. First of all, where do I rank in the lineup of the 16? You, well, for, you would probably, actually, none of your, neither of you, you guys would be in the top two, two to three.

What do you mean, of crazy or of less crazy? Less crazy. Nice. You guys would be in the top two, two to three. What do you mean, of crazy or of less crazy? Less crazy. Nice. You guys would be in the tops. Shut the fuck up. So no way, dude. If we go back to, you guys would be. Rerun the test, there's no way.

You guys would be three and four. You would come before Reed. Me? Both of you. Dude, high five, bro. You guys would come before Reed. Me? Both of you. Dude, high five bro. You guys would come before Reed. Yeah, Reed's fucked up. Yeah.

Yeah. Reed's not bad. No, he's normal. Wait, so you're saying of all these people that work here, Tom and I are in the top five. Of healthiest. Yes. Talk about fudging answers.

Now after watching Bad Thoughts. Yo. Yo. I have a question. Thank you. What were you doing in the moment, you came up with that, were you on the toilet, were she doing some dominatrix stuff,

were you drinking, were you in a car accident? Wait, which sketch? Oh no, the whole thing. Oh, oh, oh. Cause at one point I was gonna say, you know, there's some scenes, I mean, was there pegging going on or something at home? Because you came up with some crazy ass ideas.

I'm just trying to figure out. Me too. I'm trying to figure out where they're from as well. No, I'm being serious. Oh yeah, I was like, ah. Because I'm like, this is mental health problems. When I saw that show, I'm like, first of all, how many, it all how many it's

all it's dick stuff it was like he just wants to fuck the world is it all the press what was going on at that just got renewed for season two very excited it was back in the writers room I think I thought of it like a mix between your comedy and jackass mmm interesting you know Jackass, I sat through some of that, I was like, oh God, there was one thing I could not get through. And that was with the sister on the back. I actually fast forwarded through that.

It was, it was. You're not the only one. That was the one. I was like, I'm done. That's very curious, yeah. If very, very, if you were to psychoanalyze. I'm not going to, cause I don't have the degree, but very very if you were to psychoanalyze, I'm not going to cuz like don't have a degree but very interesting one, I think it is just stemmed in humor of the Gotcha effect the aha, you know, I think it's shocking off shock and all

Cuz he likes to horrify his mommy. Yeah. Yeah, so we're all the collective like upsetting people Yeah, he loves to upset people. I don't know where it's upsetting, but I think there is that sadistic side. Hmm, that exists. You know, to have fun with seeing people's reactions, and maybe that goes into the attention seeking. Yeah, I do like that. I do like seeing people's reactions, and I do like seeing somebody get mortified,

horrified, scared. Yes. Like, I like doing all those things to people. So that might be that attention seeking that you're wondering on. seeing somebody get mortified, horrified, scared. I like doing all those things to people. So that might be that attention seeking that you're wondering on. You know, that it's, there's like, the show, Jackass is about the attention seeking.

Absolutely. I will tell you in the beginning, I was like, damn, he could play a professional. I was impressed. I was like, the first scene, it was walking. I was like, it's gonna be a serious show. Yeah, and then he shit himself. Hmm Yeah, yeah. Well, thank you. Yeah, I almost paused sessions to finish it. Yeah But I had to ask what was going through your mind when you created that yeah, well, I mean the thing is there's so many things

going through the mind because a show like that, you develop over time and one of the stories might have come to me 15 years ago and you just have this nugget and then you try to figure out how do I write a short story about this little idea. And then also, so some of them are very much my brain going like, this is the story. Some of them are honestly, because there's a writer's room, you throw out like a nugget of an idea. And then you have these comedy writers with you and you guys come up with this. So

there's depending on the actual individual story, I could tell you like, oh, that comes from this, or that came from the room, or that's this thing that's been in my head for 15 years. Like it changes depending on the story. What did you think when he had these ideas? Well, I've been, like he said, I've been listening to a lot of these for about 20 years. That's how long he and I have been together. And so I've seen the nuggets as he said over the years, they're reoccurring jokes in our world. Yeah.

And then the other stuff I was like, dude, does he just want to fuck everybody else but me? Like, what is going on? It was like every every sketch he's banging someone new. Even the pilots. He's fucking he's licking the assholes of old the elderly. And they were licking my ass. Yeah, I'm like, are we gonna open this marriage up? Are you Polly? What's happening? I'm Polly and I'm by maybe. But I will say to be able to do those scenes, it does show you it's a high level of Are you Polly? What's happening? I'm Polly and I'm bi. Maybe. But I will say to be able to do those scenes, it does show he has a high level of security about himself. Oh, about himself. Yeah. Like he's not insecure about who he is.

Oh, God, no. This guy loves himself. I'm the one. I think I'm a piece of shit. He thinks he's the God's gift to the world, but that's why I love him, too We I'm attracted to it, but I'm attracted to it because I think I'm God's gift to the world He's teaching me. Do you understand? Yeah, I wanted that trait. So that's why I was attracted to him. He was so secure He gives you that counterbalance where he'll give you the compliments But yet you probably try to deflect them and say yeah, but doesn't compliment me liar. This is a big lie This is huge manipulation.

Doesn't she look beautiful? Listen, this is huge manipulation. I know he does. And she 100% does what you said. I deflect like crazy. Deflect, goes, I'm uncomfortable. What are we doing? It just like leaves the apps 100%. Also, I'm deeply offended by, I think I'm God's gift to the world You do compared to me who I think I'm a piece of shit this is this is again what should be flagged on your chart, she's a

incredible manipulator Like starly am I a manipulator no, I you are. I don't need her to tell me anything. You've got the fucking shrink here. Doesn't matter. You guys are tied on manipulator. Ah! Ha ha! No.

But here's the thing. High five time. She's more. Come on, we're sharing traits, you psycho. She's certainly more adept at it. Oh my God, see, hold on. Why does he interpret my honesty as manipulation? Excuse me.

So the difference is. I'm not. Excuse me. No, no, excuse me. I think I'm God's gift to the world. You don't think that's- I think, I'm sorry. When I say that, I'm comparing it to relative to how I see myself. So relative to my poor self view, my self-esteem, and you didn't hear the other part to that, which was I feel like you have the self-esteem, the security, the confidence that I wanted when I met you when we were 20 something. And I emulate that. I actually it's such a good trait that I want that. I'm just I'm joking. I'm half I'm exaggerating because we're doing a show right now. Yeah, I find it deeply offensive. And I think I feel like you are just, you know, a disassociative borderline manipulative narcissistic terrible person. Well, let the

fucking Dr. Hope tell you if I am or not. Well, we know that we already know that you lied. I'm not a fucking borderline narcissistic. I'm none of those things. No. And I don't fucking lie, but she is close to elevated and psychoticism She's clit she is elevated in schizo tipple She's just eccentric and Then it goes into avoidant So it's just it's above average. Well, here's the thing. This is why we know she's lying Because she should be your 110% on avoidance. You got, she scored above average and with OCD.

Big time. Above average slightly with narcissism. I'm a comic. She is lowest with antisocial and antisocial with psychopathy. She's clinically significant with anxiety. Absolutely. Elevated with attention seeking. Sure, I'm a comic.

Clinically significant with eccentricity. Restricted affectivity. And I think that it's your expressions, trying to express it's just like. Restrict, like your Asperger's? You're kind of like restricted in. Autistic? No, no, no, no, like, you're kind of like restricted in how you're no, no, no, no, no, no. It's a, let me find you. I don't share feelings. I don't

like exactly. Yeah. I don't like them. So yeah, no, you're just, you hold stuff in. Oh, big crammer. It's why I had cancer. I know I'm in cancer ate my body because I can't feel feelings. I don't like to feel them. Yeah. That well, after hearing, you know, the thing with your mom, get the fuck out My mom's a borderline my dad's drunk. Good luck, but that's no and that's why the the disengaging. Oh, that's your protective That's you know, there's a room in my house where I go to disengage I have a goth room and I sit there and I get weird alone and I have to do it Otherwise, I yeah lose my mind and that's that

Elevated on withdrawal. Yeah, you know and that's just that normal. Yeah, you know, that's that elevated on withdrawal. Yeah. And that's just that normal. Yeah. That's your normalcy. It is, I love it. Your survival skill. And that going into a room to hide is that child emotion, that trauma part, saying I'm gonna take over,

but what happens is the prefrontal cortex, the adult brain disengages during that time, and that trauma part takes over. Unless there's a healthy communication They do not function at the same time the child part engages Hmm and this disengages and then have you guys ever had it or have you ever watched where you guys have a disagreement? And she's kind of going off the rails being very reactive But no not and she's trying to explain it, but it makes absolutely no sense and then suddenly

But no not and she's trying to explain it but it makes absolutely no sense and then suddenly She caught she calms down and then all of a sudden she's like, I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that I don't know why I felt that I do know I'm sorry. Yeah. Yes I the beginning is I don't know why now I've had enough therapy that I have analyzed the shit out of it And I can actually tell him now. Hey, I'm in a I'm in an episode I need you to bring me back. And he helps me. And she's like, hit, she goes slap the shit out of me. Hit me as hard as you can in the face.

Slap like that. Peg me. Yeah, he helps bring me back sometimes. We peg all the time. It answers a lot of things on bad thoughts then. So much anal plague. I'm telling you, it's all assholes. Now, go ahead, What are you gonna...

No, we just have to wrap, Jean. And then, oh, we have to wrap when it's your turn. No, we do. Interesting. And so we're at the end. So, well, no pun intended. And thanks for coming in. No, you shit turd. I want to hear his fucked up. But real quick. Dr. Hope, Torres.

Those are your trauma parts, kicking in and taking over those episodes. Yes. So I teach people to have their partner learn Hey, that's a child part engage a child part because if you engage as an adult you're gonna disengage even more for sure Yeah, so you can't be he can be rational. You're not gonna be rational. It's not gonna work Yeah, so I used to feel with me not not he won't be able to feel with you and before I get to his When when we think of this as trauma, or think of this as life, there, you know, life is a forest,

there's all these forests around the world. Okay, so I don't mean to bore you with this one of my explanations is there's all these forests around the world, and there's no two forests that are same, no same entry point, you and I can be born at the same time with the tree between us. And our paths are still going to be different ahead of us. The obstacles we have we're going to navigate around. When you look back there's going to be all of these stones in your path and those are the experiences you've had that have guided you on your path. So

no two paths can ever be compared. We can't truly and honestly compare each other, ourselves to each other because our paths are different. So he'll never be able to understand or feel what you feel, but he can learn to empathize. Right. And engage at your level. That's what I'm saying, like not over it, not. I think that is like the kind of what happened. Yeah.

Do him, do him, do him. Yes, okay, so he is high in disinhibition, distractibility, impulsivity. Yeah. He's high in withdrawal. Check. He's high in eccentricity. So, he was higher in antisocial. He was above average in antisocial.

Antisocial with psychopathy and borderline, the three she was lowest in. So, here's yours. Let me tell you something else was lowest in so here's yours let me tell you something and here's hers but let me tell you something I'm fucking crazier than him something she fucking deserves it because your schizo tip deserves it just because your schizo tipple in avoidant or higher on the above average here's a slightly above but he's a fucking borderline a male borderline it's right ohline? It's right.

Oh, I knew it. I fucking knew I married a borderline. Everybody all have a copy of theirs. I married a fucking borderline? No you didn't. What else? What else? Borderline and what else?

Dude, this is- Anti-social, anti-socialist psychopathy. We know that. So it's just, which had the highest elevation was the schizo-tipple. And I beat him only because of my- Beat him. If you look at the levels- You're clinically alarming.

The ones that are above average. I'm nowhere near- You had a higher measurement. Like I'm nowhere near you on any of them. Yeah, but I- No, you could be hospitalized. It's just funny you guys debated as who was antisocial. Oh, this guy right here.

Those are her three that are the lowest and yours that are the highest. And by the way, my mother was a borderline. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy.

I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I'm a sociopathy. I'm a sociopathy, I don't. But maybe you project that and I would like to learn to project that more. No, but the thing is I think you're projecting your narcissism on me. Is that right, am I?

Maybe? I think maybe with time, you've also gotten more confident in some ways. You probably started to think better about yourself in therapy. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So which means that that's gonna be elevated a little bit too. Oh look, you're a real piece of shit here.

OCD? I'm bat shit. Oh, avoidant? There's a big time piece of shit. See, I thought he was way more avoidant than me because he tends to go into his cave and ignore me and the family. Look at this POS score here.

Always checking out on the phone, you know. Well, who's a piece of shit, where? Right here, man. What's that one again? I'm schizo, what's again, the schizo tip type, tip? The schizo schizo tips? It's just like a weird you're weird. You're eccentric. I love it I love it. Yes, just like like Bill Murray on caddyshack. Just I'm way crazier than that You got no antisocial wait, I'm curious. So I let I'm curious this this schizo typical thing

I feel like we've all everybody I think scores on it. Yeah, it's in But you'll have people that it's really impacts their life cuz like like, you know where I live There's a young lady. I like to shop at the dollar store because it's the best you feel like you're so many good snacks in there Yes, so I like it and there's this young girl, young lady that comes in. I don't know what she's dressed as. It's a mix between hoarding and furry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Super weirdos.

She wears like big plastic lips. Well, you made a, you had a great, didn't you say doc from Back to the Future? Yeah, I like that guy. Yeah, he's schizo-typal, so like that. Super eccentric Future. Yeah, I like that guy. Yeah, he's schizotypal, so like that. Super eccentric person. Yes, so she has that, and then her car has not just stickers, but toys glued all over it.

But yet I'm not antisocial, and I, cause I like, I'm nice to people. And I don't have antisocial with psychopathy. My husband's score is very high. Not very high, very average. Very high. Very average. Slightly above average. Antisocial.

I can't believe we're this healthy. But you guys are, you guys were in the tops of being healthy. That's fucking wild. But I see that they don't have Chris. Yeah, where's Chris Larson on this? Because he's a complete. He would be number four.

On crazy? Of healthy? On healthy. So he's this? Because he's a complete. He would be number four. On crazy? Of healthy? On healthy. So he's higher on, he's highest. He's elevated on detachment. And rage. That makes sense. And he's highest.

He's elevated almost clinically significant in OCD. Nice, he's a good editor. And he's high in avoidant. Yeah, all those guys are kind of weird. Everything else is pretty low. They stay in the bay. He's kicked a dog. Let's um...

Ryan is number... Hang on, he was number four. Ryan is... Really? He's healthy. Number five. He's healthy. Healthy. Highest elevated in antagonism.

He's deceitful, grandiosity, and manipulative. Look at any nutty. And he is on the edge, literally on the edge, with antisocial, with psychopathy, and OCD. Wow. Yeah, his numbers are high. That's fucking high, man. And he's healthy.

He's also, I'd like to point out, a thief. So there's that too. We just learned that this week. Did he steal your food? No, he stole Tanner's gift. It was a gift. It was a gift, yeah. He stole it.

That's not nice. Well, that kind of goes, well, maybe that's what the OCD is. It was an honest mistake. Let's call it what it was. It was an honest mistake, right? He stole it. Okay, it was an honest mistake. And he was six, and Chris, Chris, or I'm sorry,

Carly was seven. Clinically significant with negative affectivity, and highly above average with borderline narcissism and OCD. Nice. Love Carly. We're all winners. Carly's great. We're all winners. Okay. I got things for everybody. We got a rep. Thank you so much, Doc. Dr. Hope Torres, thank you for coming in. We're all winners. Carly's great. We're all winners. Okay. I got things for everybody.

We got a rep. Thank you so much, Doc. Dr. Pope Torres. This is amazing. Thank you for coming in. This was so fun. Thank you for giving us your time and giving us this insight.

We know we have some work to do. We have a few people that we are rushing into therapy sessions. And I will, if he's open to it, I will pay for Tanner to see you if he's open to it. That's awesome. Yeah, he needs help. Let's get you, let's get Tanner in.

And if anybody does, you know, I just, I work from home, but I have my own practice and I just, I see everybody virtually. So I like everybody to have control of their environment versus taking them into an environment they're not comfortable in. Brilliant. This was really great. Thank you so much. Thank you,

and just as the last, anyway, you know, she's a fucking liar. Thank you guys for watching and we'll see you next week. I think you would all be like, this is one sick, twisted, deviant person. Screaming is like history, it makes me laugh. I'm clearly schizophrenic and dangerous, you psychotic. Complete lack of emotion. Thank you. I have what's called empathy. Why do you have that? I think it's a red flag.

He's a psychopath. I'm clearly schizophrenic and dangerous, you psychotic. Complete lack of emotion. Thank you. I have what's called empathy. Why do you have that? I think it's a red flag. He's a psychopath.

Kill that huger. Kill that huger. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker.

Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. Kill that hooker. I do think you're a serial killer.

I'll kill us both, I swear to God I will. Now you're in an awkward conversation with a serial killer. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a kid's good makes me laugh. A screaming is like a awkward conversation with a serial killer. A screaming is like the physical that makes me laugh. You're about to get murdered. A screaming is like the physical that makes me laugh.

No, just look at him, he's a psycho look on your face. The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh. The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh. The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh. Do you know what kind of a psychopath I look like? The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh. The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh. The screaming is like the reason it makes me laugh.

No, no, no, this is the best part though. I hate who I'm becoming socially. Dude, I'm just saying, Jesus, I've never considered that. No psychological training, you can pick that up. Everything is psycho. Am I out of my mind? That's right. I'm crazy. I remember my face. You know when you just get like real rage like And then I fucking kill the guy

What'd you do as a kid? Were you twisting rabbits next? Think you're a fucking shrink right now? Don't go there when you're talking to a sick person I'll really piss him off and then he'll let it, let me have it And I know that you suspect that my husband is a psycho. He's a functioning psychopath. I pick someone and I go, follow him. Get to know their habits, when I go to war.

Evil or good? Something's really wrong with me. Verbal tic. Something's really wrong with me. Verbal tic. Something's really wrong with me. Verbal tic. Something's really wrong with me.

Verbal tic. Sup, K! Sup, champ! bye! I've been out here for a minute! I like house parties man! the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh

you're about to get murdered the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh the screaming is like the music that makes me laugh no just screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. No, just look at the psycho look on your face. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh.

The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. Do you know what kind of a psychopath I look like? The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like it makes me laugh. The screaming is like the reason it makes me want it. Oh, this is the best phone call I've ever had. I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna kill you!

I'm gonna kill you! Music