Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - How To Win A Fight In A Comedy Club w/ Ali Siddiq | Your Mom's House Ep. 775

Episode Date: September 4, 2024

SPONSORS: - Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM. This week on Your Mom's House Podcast, Tom Segura and Christina P are joined by comedian Ali Siddiq! Christine is once again surprisingly silent this week, so Tom does all the talking. Tom and Ali talk about how Ali went from a prison cell to comedy clubs and giant theaters. Tom also gets the surprising reason why Ali's arm is in a sling and hears the dramatic story that came from that same incident. They also discuss the concept of athlete's "playing hurt", fighting in comedy clubs, scared straight, the boredom created behind bars, street smarts, the big ass city of Houston, and so much more! Your Mom’s House Ep. 775 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinaponline.com/tour-dates https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to another episode of Your Mom's House. Sitting in with me as always is my lovely co-host, Christina. That is amazing. You look beautiful as always. And joining us today for the first time, Long Overdue, is a comedian whose, his epic special endeavor that which we're gonna get into is out on YouTube. The Domino Effect 4, Pins and Needles is streaming now on YouTube, it is Ali Sadiq everybody, let him hear it.

That's good people. And you can get tickets for his shows at alisadiq.com. Real quick before I forget, we just announced I'm doing Boston TD Garden on February 14th, Valentine's Day of next year. And then we announced February 22nd, I'll be at the Moody Center here in Austin, Texas. And also coming up in the next week or two, I will be in Las Vegas September 7th Vancouver September 13th and Denver at ball arena on September 14th more 2025 dates will be announced soon tickets for those alright Tom cigar comm slash Tour now I have to tell you something man. I was I was alluding to this before I

Met you when we did we did Ari show Yes, sir, and I was for, I think I was walking around and I just heard like Mexicans got on Boost today and I was like what the fuck? And I laughed so, I was like this guy's hilarious and I thought you were very funny. And I keep up with like you know, you see like oh, this guy's on the road or someone will be like

oh I just saw Ali, how's he doing? You're like that's cool, you know he's doing well, great. And then I know you're coming in and I'm like, they gave me like a like, oh, you know He's been working on this this self-released Streaming thing for his specials and I go oh like what is it? No, like oh, it's like it's part four of I think will be six and I go wait what and then they're like

Yeah, it's like a series of specials. And so I go okay, and they go the latest one Came out in June June I think yeah father's day okay it came out father's day it's almost at three million views you're combined already at 25 million plus for what you put out and I was like what and I look at this latest one and first thing I noticed is it's at hour 56 and I go fucking two hours long and I'm like What is because most when you watch specials a lot of times you're like this motherfucker should have cut this shit down Like a lot of one-hour specials. You're like this should be a 40 minute special Yeah, and I'm watching yours and I'm like dude. It's unbelievable. It really is one of the best things

I've seen in a long time. It is like it's poignant at times somber Hilarious and I think most of all it is vivid like it's vivid storytelling and I I mean I love to tell stories and I the reason I love to tell stories because I love to Watch storytellers and hear storyteller, but this thing I mean It's so good, I really can't recommend it enough. And I guess what I would recommend is probably start with part one, right?

I started with the one that had just come out, so I don't even know about the... Oh. Because you can, you can jump in on part four, and it just opens and you're like, you know, what I love too is that good storytellers don't panic. That's, I always tell, when people go, how do you tell a good story?

Like when they ask me about storytelling, I'm like, you know, there's like the comics who are just like joke joke guys, sometimes they have like a moment of silence, they're like, ah, and they start acting like they, they can't sit on silence. And storytellers like use silence, you know? So this part four starts very quiet.

And there's like this buildup, but it pulls you in. It's like it's very, like you lean forward. And then it eventually turns to a joke. And like you just put together as I'm watching it that I mean yeah because it starts with the like the prison number like you start getting into the number and how your numbers like your identification and how you've heard it a million times and said it a million times and then like I mean I'm just like leaning into this thing and it's such like the characters like I saw you brought a win in Brown today but this is so it's so good man it's so good oh man thank you

very very much yeah I'm very impressed and I really really I highly recommend it I want to ask the guys so many questions to ask is like one of the things I watch I look, first of all, very happy for you that you're doing theaters and selling them out. I mean, that's, can you think of, can you imagine you incarcerated realizing that in a few years, that you're gonna,

what your life is now, it's gotta be insane to you, right? When you stop and think about it? Yeah, it's definitely one of those things. You're like, I was gonna call my friend the other day and like, yo man, do you believe, like we was just at the dealership and this is clean money. Right.

This is clean money and me and him was locked up together. And I'm like, yo, I met him at the dealership because he's getting ready to buy a Porsche. And I walked in, I'm like, which one you getting? Because I was thinking about grabbing something. I'm like, yo, this is for real. Like this is, it's one of those things that I would have never thought that I can buy something

very expensive on a Tuesday and not, and be totally fine. And it's, you don't sweat it, it doesn't affect your lifestyle. And you know that you're gonna go out on the weekend and recoup whatever you spent. Do you know why I didn't buy that Porsche? And it's why I haven't bought a Porsche yet. Why?

Because I get spooked by things. And I remember I was out the country again, having a good time, and David Arnold texts me on Instagram. He's like, yo, I thought I had your number in my phone. It's my number, call me. And I was like, well, I call him when I get back, you know, from vacation. Yeah.

You know? No one better than that. No one I should just call right then, cause I know I get spooked. Then I got back and David Arnold had passed. And he had just, like I literally saw him on Instagram. He had just bought this beautiful burgundy Porsche. And like in the middle of his he's celebrating his his victory taking

Go buy this poor fool and then he passed And I was like, I'm not going to get no Porsche. I'm I'm cool. And this is cuz I'm spooked Yeah, if it is one of those things make sense like Not to throw nothing out there If I would have if I if somebody would have sent me your video right before I went on vacation, I would never be in this. I was like, nope, nope, nope, not doing it. Something's about to happen.

For people that don't know, you just had surgery last week for- Broken ribs and a separated clavicle. They had to put my shoulder back together. And the activity you were doing? Surfing. Now was this a first time? No. You've been surfing before?

I was surfing before. I was done and I was walking out. By the way, it's always when you're done. I was done too, dude. I was done. I was like, I'm good. And they're like, you got it. Do one more.

That's how that should happen. Done. I'm walking out. My son says says like he's right in front of me my son said dad look this how big the way was I Turned around and I was like, oh Okay, that's the way I couldn't get nowhere and it just crashed down on me and slammed me into the sand, right? So my arm I never would have thought that I would have got like road rat that's from a wave crash this is the same like it's sand blasted my own like and I've gotten color back now it's it was so pink it was crazy so they had to open up my whole shoulder to put it back and you know they had this thing called MyChart where they

send you your stuff. My doctor looked older on there so I trusted him. Yeah yeah yeah. I was like yo he's done this a thousand times. Yeah. My doctor, I didn't really see him. He said I've met him before surgery but the anesthesiologists they are very sneaky people. Mm-hmm. It's like yo can you count backwards from 10? I was like 10 and I never even thought of it. I never even thought of nine. Like nine. It's like, yo, can you count backwards from 10? I was like 10 and I never even thought of nine. Like nine, it never came into my mind, nine. So I met him, I guess, during that time. And when he walked in, he said, man, hey,

the first thing he said, this is what I knew, he was too hip, he was like, yo, love you, Travis Scott. Do you wanna know what I did to you? I'm like, wait a minute, he's a sneakerhead? I'm like, no, I minute he's a sneaker head doctor so he's telling me all the stuff that he had to do he's like more Drake Kendrick what's what you're feeling right now and you're like what the fuck you're 70 so he tells me already that he's my I had to put a rope and Pinned it and put it in figure eight and then I put some cadaver

Ten days or no Jesus and after he'd said all that I said Was it a black cadaver? He's there was Ali. That's some racist shit Let it be a tough white guy. You know what I mean? Give me a tough white guy's shit. Is it like cushion? Like, cushion came back very fast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, so when you got hit,

you obviously know immediately you're fucked up. Oh, it's like when the wave hit me, right, I heard a, it's like somebody crunched up a bag of chips. Yeah. And I was like, oh, my neck is definitely broke. Like in my mind, I was like, oh, my neck is definitely broken. So I tumbled, right, and the first thing in my mind

is like, yo, my son is out here, so if it messes me up, it had to affect my son, right? And how old is he? 13. I have two, 131, 13. So I'm looking for him, and as I'm looking, I notice that one arm is moving and one arm is not. And I'm like, oh, I don't even wanna look at it.

I can't move my arm, I don't wanna look at it. So I'm looking for my son, and my son is literally standing in safety, like like hey, what's going on with you guys? Like what's the deal? I looked at him like, Hassan Hassan Come on Okay, I can't move

Said I've run up this hill right? I'm 50 man been in prison for six years, been in the streets since I was 10. I'm a pretty rugged dude, man. When I came up, cause you had to come up to the beach, had to come up over the sand, my mom, my aunt, and my sister were in a canopy,

just relaxing. And me and my mom locked eyes. I'm still like at least 30 40 yards away from her. Yeah. We locked eyes and I just looked at her like and she's looking like what? I'm like, I'm like seven years old now. I need to get to the man. I was my my body was on fire like something was I knew something was wrong inside. Shock response inside of you, yeah. But my big thing was my, I couldn't move my arm.

So this guy is like, first of all, Mexican people are very tough. Hey everyone, with the football season kicking off, it's the perfect time to dive into the action with our partners at DraftKings, the number one place to bet on touchdowns. And right now, all new customers who bet $5 will instantly get $250 in bonus bets,

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Aventura Visa for Business at cibc.com slash Aventura Business. Terms and conditions apply. Yeah, very, very tough people. So they even got me, this man took his shirt off, at CIBC.com slash Aventura Business. Terms and conditions apply. Yeah. Very, very tough people. So they even got me, this man took his shirt off, ripped it and tied my arm in a thing. And they got the wheelchair they bringing up and he tells me, he said, hey man,

this is not that bad, you're gonna be okay. I used to be a bull rider, this happens all the time. I'm like, yo, this is a different sport. Yeah, man. This is a whole different sport. I'm like, I don't care nothing about your bull rider, this happens all the time. I'm like, yo, this is a different sport. Yeah, man. It's a different sport. I don't care nothing about your bull riding expectations. Yo, bro, then I hated that they rode me through the resort. Hey man, go around back, take me around the back.

You ain't gotta take me in front of everybody. They rode me right through the resort. Yeah, full display. Everybody looking, people with martini's like, what happened to you? I'm like, I'm like this, no pictures, no pictures. Like, yo, it was, it was. And did they take you straight to a hospital?

Straight to the hospital. They had an ambulance outside, right? Wow. And a Cabo, in Mexico, the ambulance in Cabo, they look different from regular ambulances. This is like a priest that said said st. Luke's on his eyes He wasn't even no ambulance person. He was just a regular person. Yeah, he's like hospital hospital Whatever he said, I'm like man who called you like this, but he's legit cuz it's say the hospital

Yeah, I'm like wow. This is an uber man I want I want medical shit. You have no patches on or nothing. And then, so did you do the operation there? No, I did the x-rays and everything there. They didn't even know my ribs were broke there. They just was really focused on my shoulder. And so I get back, get x-rays, and then they said,

well, you're gonna have to have an MRI, because we need to really get into the shoulder. But just in case you don't know, I'd never forget this lady named Basandi. She said, where is most of your pain at? And I was like, in my back, and right up under my arms. So I was talking, I'm like, in my back, and up under my arms. She was like, hey, you wanna see your x-rays?

I remember they never showed your x-rays on 50 remember they never showed your X-rays on 50. They never showed your X-rays going up. Now they love plashtum in front of you. And she's like. And screens like this too though. Big screens. And she's like, oh, you see all them black spots? I say, yeah.

Those are breaks in your ribs. Like you've broken five and you've broken six. I'm like, oh, okay. And your sternum is severely sprained. Like you have a really bad bruise in your sternum. And I'm like, oh, that's what that is. And I said, and I know I'm, I'm, I'm smart. I know I'm intelligent, but when you have pain, you just say weird things. I said, why is it hurting my back back and she said? The ribs kind of like wrap around like all your important things Wait you have us you have the the sand scar here

For so but the this shoulder is the one that's broken. No, this is so this is the broken Yeah, and then is this side sensitive too? No, nothing. Okay, okay. This side, this is my new, I had a sling that, I had the original sling, right? Their sling in Mexico was pretty good because it kind of crisscrossed and held me up.

So then after the surgery, they gave me another sling, right? So I went, I've been on the road so all this is happening in three weeks right so I left Mexico came back didn't know my ribs broke I flew to Salt Lake City to do wise guys having no idea that my ribs are broken Jesus come back find out my ribs are broken I said well that's the reason why I haven't been able to sleep. I get it. So then I come back. I do Omaha. I come. I was supposed to have a surgery that week. Didn't have it.

Came back that Monday had the surgery rested Tuesday. Got on a plane to go do Atlanta Wednesday and Thursday. Then went from there to Madison, Wisconsin, County and States, which is a great club. Great club. So good. Spoiled, right? Oh, so spoiled.

So, and then I came back home, then I came here. How's your pain right now? Like what? Because it's probably too hard now because I won't take the medication. Yeah. Cause I don't want to be on opioids. It's a thing with me.

It's one of them things I get spooked. It's like I've taken maybe I have maybe 30 pills, 40 pills or something. Where are they now? In the backpack. That's cool, bring them out. Let's fucking see what they look like. I only have taken like four this whole time.

And when I was in Mexico, oh man, Mexico has a Yeah, everything. A phenomenal system. Yeah. Because when he came and he brought me the prescription, you know, you're gonna need anti-inflammatories and painkillers, cool. I said, what did I get to feel that?

He said, I'll take that and be right back. Walked out and came right back with the medication. I was like. Oh, okay. You know, he just walk in and be like, I want this. And they're like, okay, yeah. Yeah, and so I was taking that for a little bit and then I was like, nah, I'm cool on these pills, man.

So I just, after the surgery, I've taken maybe two pills after the surgery. And two pills before, I can't do it. I think you're, I mean, that's better off, man. I had a... Unless you're in excruciating pain. A nerve blocker. Oh, this was the scariest experience

because my arm was totally dead. Like they just shut my arm off Yeah, all the nerves right they do a sonogram put right in your nerve and then I'm trying to go to the restroom So I set my arm on my chair. I took the sling off cuz I'm gonna take a shower I said my chair. I'm like, okay, it'd be fine. I Tried to open the door and my arm fell off my chest and the weight of it turned me red because I didn't want to rip nothing. And I was like, oh, hold on.

I was like, man. It was, I just, the problem is when you, I don't have any lotion on this shoulder. I'm like, I just, this bothers me so. It's like I can't get lotion on my shoulder. And I was in the restroom, I came in I came in with my restroom and I'm like, yo, this is like a seven minute trip. Like we should have been in and out.

This is like seven minutes now. I know, it's like these things when they happen, I think also like at our age, it does remind you of like your mortality. It does humble you. It does make you like grateful for it. You're like, yeah, take all this shit for granted. Like moving around normally and stuff.

You know what I mean? Like. So spooked though. Yeah, it spooks you out too. And since the surgery, you know, they'll tell you, well, you gotta do this because you develop a blood clot or whatever. So as I'm performing, just had the surgery,

Wednesday or Thursday, my friend Beat King passed. And they say it's from a blood clot. This just came out his leg up to his heart. He doing the interview, shortness of breath. I'm on stage and my breath gets short. And my, like this tightens up on me like real, really bad, but I keep forgetting my ribs are broken and it's nothing they can do. They got a heel on their own.

Yeah, that's the crazy thing about ribs. They're just like, just take a, I don't know, rest, walk around, you're fine. And he said, long as it's not puncturing your lungs, and then they give you these things, you know, you know, to shatter your ribs, you know what it would take? You know, you're gonna be fine. It would take a lot.

Your ribs are really, really sturdy. It would take a car to run into you to shatter your ribs. I'm like, well, ma'am, the wave did a pretty good job. But you gotta understand, it's a wave. And I don't know how big it was, but the wave water is a force. So I'm breathing, it tightened up in my back, and my mind is like, you have a blood clot,

you're about to die in front of all these people. And I'm like, just let me make it through this story. Just let me make it through this story. So. You ever think about, like, do you ever follow when an NFL quarterback's get their ribs fucked up and like bruised or broken and then they're like,

yeah, just put on this rib protector and go play. Like, and you're like, what the fuck? With a defensive end just flying at them and you're like, you're good with this? And they're like, I guess, I guess. I don't think, I think football players are a different, a totally different animal. Yeah.

Like rugby, right? Rugby to me is way harder than just professional football. It's a crazy sport. Cause you run into people a lot, but I don't think you run into them as much as football, but. Pads, no pads. Just no pads. And this is how I grew up playing football with no football, but. Pads, no pads? Just no pads. And this is how I grew up playing football with no pads,

but I was young. You know, when they gave me pads, I was like an insane person. Like, oh, I can hit you with all this and I don't have to hurt myself. But football players are different. Ronnie Lott, to me Ronnie Lott is like a real football player. Just cut it off, put it in the cooler

So it back on after the game. I'm like just missing that pink. It's like now Ronnie They're like it's got caught in someone's helmet and he just was like cut that shit off I'm done Meet the locker room and shoot me up with everything and he played in the era where they were like when you were like Hey protect the player. they were like protect the player I'm like, what are you talking about? Like I'm just gonna put the crown on my head into his chest plate and see if I live and he lives Like every play was like a paralysis play, you know clothes lining people

We used to look at football and nobody had teeth. Yeah Yeah, they were there at that and their equipment sucked too compared to what they have today those guys had like sandpaper in their shoulders like nothing man hey put my shirt in like put me on two shirts and put my pants on like absolute animals could you imagine playing the leather helmet era? Who's that guy? Jack Tatum? Yeah.

Was that his name? Was it Tatum? Look him up. Is it this dude? Yeah. Dude, Jack Tatum. Oh. Look at that.

Look at that face, man. That's not a... Oh, he played for the Raiders. That's the nicest he's ever looked in a photo, too. That's him smiling. Yeah, that's a smile for Jack Tatum. He's the nicest he's ever looked in a photo to that's him smiling. Yeah, that's a smile You look great man, yeah, look at a friendly guy today This news a lunatic man all those guys at water was crazy at water was totally dick Buccus

I see him. Oh dick Buccus was insane total crazy person Yeah, I mean in his and his in his playing days. Yeah, dude this guy fifth like when you see him there with the finger up That was an era where like he probably ended someone's career that game Definitely. Yeah It pointed at it. Yeah, you're through. Yeah They would do things they could see them like in the highlights where they were as they're tackling them. They're like Twisting helmets like they're trying to hurt each other, you know, it's a yeah that era is the leather helmet era even crazier Yeah, that's like the steel curtain those guys. Yeah, and it was a

Man, it did you have to the guys like the samurai, you know, yeah, I Know there's like there are just different men Yeah, right like I just and so like that era that in that time It was a samurai or some warrior and like, you know, or the Coliseum people in Rome Yeah, like yeah, it was fucking lions are coming at you or whatever and then you just it evolves today It's it's probably the craziest person is probably an MMA fighter, right? Like the UFC guys. They're fucking out of their minds Yeah fighting into the you know close to the death Elbows to the fucking face and then like I'm gonna kick you as hard I can in your face several times

And you like oh, yeah, I mean like half the highlights that I watch From UFC you're like, you know part of you is like, oh man, this guy's so skilled He's his you know, his training is obviously he's super dedicated. He's super disciplined, but the Brutality of it you know, you know,'s like, seeing a dude take a knee to the face and just, ha, and it's fucking, I mean, it's just, and you know he has severe brain damage after that. I'm glad his mouth was closed when he did it, because that tongue is gone.

It's gone, yeah. It's gone. And then they put him on a mic, and he's like, I just want one more shot. And you're like, fuck man. I just want to do it one more time. One more time. It, fuck man. I just wanna do it one more time. It's a rematch.

I think that this is pretty close. Like comedy with me is pretty close to that. Like I don't think nothing has ever stopped me from getting on stage. Yeah. The big guy out there has set me on a chair, cause my ankle is fractured, and I'm still on stage.

Or I have a hundred and four fever, and I'm still going, I'm like, yo, Dre, just get me to the stage. Once I get to the stage, it's some sort of medicine for me. Like, the only reason I tell people what's going on with the arm, because they won't let me get around it. They won't hear the story about it.

I would get on stage and totally talk about something else. You know, I was on Joy Diaz's podcast. I had just broken my hand in a brawl in Houston in the comedy club, right? And the people that was at the brawl was like, yo, we see why he was okay in prison. Like, we really can see it. Regardless of the stories, like, no, we really see how he was. And my show that got dislocated, I broke my hand,

and when I get there, right, I'm, Mercy Room, so they come in, they keep asking me about my thumb. Like, it's clear that these fingers are smashed down, but they keep asking about my thumb, like, I said, man, nothing's wrong with my thumb. And he was like, can you move your thumb? I'm like, yeah, I can about my thumb. Like, I said, man, nothing's wrong with my thumb. And he was like, can you move your thumb? I'm like, yeah, I can move my thumb. He's like, sir, you can move your thumb.

Like, yes. So the man put the x-rays up of my hand. He says, you should not be able to move your thumb. Your thumb is broken in like four places. And like, oh, okay, I never knew nothing wrong with my thumb, but my thumb was broken for like a month prior to that. Whoa. And it was insane.

And I had no idea. I thought I jammed it real bad, but I didn't know it was broken at the base, right? So I get to the hand specialist. Hand specialist comes in, he's like, I hear that you can move your thumb. And I'm like, yes, I can move my thumb. He's like, you shouldn't be able to move your thumb.

Like, I'm dead. He's like, regardless of what you saying, you should not be able to move your thumb. Another specialist came in, cause he wanted him to see it. He was like, not be able to move your thumb. Another specialist came in, he wanted him to see it. He was like, he said he can move his thumb. And I'm like, yo, I can move the thumb! Let's do a thumb one.

You want to do it? I declare war, because I'm ready! He's like, sir, your thumb is crazy. So they put my hand back together, so you can see, my thumb is in perfectly working condition. It's these fingers that's slumped down that's crazy. Like, I think they was so focused on my thumb that they didn't fix these right.

But they did a good job though. But it's like, you can see. Was the brawl like during a show or after? Yeah, it was crazy. Recently? Semi-recently? Nah, it was, let's see. We're gonna say, 20, 2020? Oh yeah, that's not that long ago though.

It was before the pandemic. So you're just doing a show? Doing a show, and this guy comes to the stage, and I just ask, I say, yo, it was some guys sitting at the table like six. Yeah. It's a room, it's not a comedy club. I said, hey man, some ladies standing up,

y'all should just let them sit down. Be boy, girl, boy, girl. And dude said, you better go on with that. Like, what are you talking about? I'm not saying anything that's not proper. Like, so the dude walk up to the stage, he said, man, I'll slap you. And I was like, what? I said, I just wanna know,

what am I supposed to be doing when you're slapping me? Like, what am I supposed to be doing? Is this a movie I'm supposed to be doing like this while you slapping me? I said, man, go sit down if something happened to you, bro. Go on, sit down. You heard what I said?

I'll slap you. And I said, not with that hairline you won't. And everybody started laughing and I'm laughing too. So I turned this way. When I turned back, I don't know if he sat there and just doing this, trying to get all the spit in his mouth he could, but when he spit at me, it was like a glob,

and I couldn't move at the time, I was like, ah! And the button was pushed in me. I don't care that you six foot four, I don't care what size you are, you just spit on me. And I'm gonna show you why that was a bad idea. It got so bad for him, his friends tried to help him. So it was four on one. And long story short, not to just give them any praise,

they filed a lawsuit against me after that because of the punishment for spitting on me. I'm like, are y'all losing your own mind? Yeah. And it was bad for them. Like it was a really bad scene because the ambulance came. I drove myself to the hospital.

For the hand. Yeah, for the hand. And I myself to the hospital. For the hand. Yeah, for the hand. And I got to the hospital, and it's always a cop in the emergency room. Yeah. I get there, I know my shoulder's messed up, my hand, I go in there, I'm like, yo, I need to see a doctor, I failed.

And as soon as I said it, the cop looked, and the nurse said, well how did you fall? And I'm looking at the cop and I'm like, I was skateboarding. He was like, at night? And I'm like, yeah, that's the best time to do it. Nobody's out there. It's a new board.

The cop said, so we went to your truck right now, there's a skateboard in your truck. I said, for sure. For sure. I said, we can walk out there now. I would drive a red Ford F-150, walk right out there and my board is right in the back. Because I skate and my board is always in my truck. That wasn't what happened but my board is, that skateboard is always in my truck so if I ever break

down I just jump on the board and I just get to the next place. I can skate, so it might, I was really confident about this one. Yeah. You turn, I'm good. Yeah. Man, got my hand seen, and then I find out, my attorney, Stan Broussard, called me and said, hey, I'm down here at the courthouse,

they just issued a warrant for your arrest. I said, what? He said, did you have a fight because this is you having assault charge I say what you know how mad I was that I found that it was them guys that filed a assault on me and I'm like yeah what type of chicken nonsense is this that we get in a street fight and you lose and you file assault okay so I beat the case because of the footage. I was gonna say, there's like, and you got witnesses everywhere.

Yeah, because of the footage. And I always say this, man, I thank white women for this, for me beating that case. White women that spit on so many cops that they made an assault to spit on people. The first assault first assault was them spitting yeah and then I never left the stage they got tow up in their club and I was on stage I never left the stage because they kept jumping up on the stage which is stupid yeah cuz you're jumping into me and it was a melee in there but it was people that was like

they was filming and plus we had cameras in The club they put in cameras So when we presented the evidence, I have this started, you know what they say This is what they say it out there face. This is what they say that I did the day was complimenting me I jumped down off the stage came to their table and said what said, what are y'all, like I started. Oh man. I mean that goes away as soon as you look at the footage. Oh, as soon as, man, staying 8 to 1 live.

So the case gets dropped, and then do they still try to file a civil suit? Like to get money? The judge asked me, do I wanna file a counter suit? And I said, in open court. I said, nah, they've been through enough because the they still going through therapy Yeah, they're still going through Therapy yeah, there was a I administered a lot of punishment

Yeah a lot of punishment they were people had to get stapled things stapled and You was in braces and your jaw had to get put back together Like I was in there. Like I was. You fucked these guys up. Cause this, they don't understand. I am a guy that was in prison since I was 19.

Hey, I am a very different type of situation. Yeah. Like I, bro, you don't have enough people to deal with me. Like at all. Cause you, if you think any of this is finna be on the level, oh you're insane. You want me to bite you in the middle of your thigh?

Like I'm a savage man, I have no respect for you. And then what you are wrong with this thing is, you thinking that this is a fight. No sir, because you trying to do something to me, sir I am doing my best to make sure that you're not breathing anymore. I'm doing my absolute best Yeah, and you're going brah. I don't even understand quit I don't even if I would if I would have saw them on a stretcher Getting put in I would have ran them over with my truck. Yeah, like I'm like, yo

I'm so upset that you, because I'm 50, I've never started a fight in my life. I've never started a fight. Been in a lot of them, never started one. And that Napoleon complex bull crap, yo, okay, so what happened was you saw that you were bigger than me, and then you thought that because you were bigger than me,

that you were gonna dominate me. How is that me having Napoleon complex? Maybe you have a big person complex, maybe you have that. Man, I'm not doing that. Then the era where comics, it was the era where comics were getting jumped on. And I was like, not over here, sir. Not this way.

And so if you jump on stage with me now, I guarantee that you not gonna leave that stage. Because I have something on me at all times. All times, it ain't one time that you'll see me on nobody's stage that I don't have anything on me. If you jump up there and it's very accessible, and I don't mind, and I don't mind, like I have no type of mind in my spirit.

Like, because you're, like why are you up here? Yeah, they're threatening you, I mean come on. I have no type of mind in my spirit. Because you're, like why are you up here? Yeah, they're threatening you, I mean come on. It's like you coming into my house. You break into my house, oh bruh. It's all type of shh. Dude, I know a guy, so a friend of mine was the Navy Seal,

and he's a serious individual with extensive training, and he happened to be out of town, so he was not home, and a meth head broke into his house, and I just tore the place. It was just crazy. But all we could talk about was like the luck of this meth head. The luck. Right? Because like what happens is most people go, someone breaks into my house, you know, I'm

going to take care of business. And you're like, yeah, most people you go, you think you're going to take care of business. But most people, you know, it's natural. They don't have the experience. The nerves take over for a lot of things. But you're like, like the guy, a lot of comments would be like, someone come on my stage and I'll take care of it. Like some of them can, but a lot of them probably wouldn't, you know.

But this fucking meth head, it's like, dude, you're the luckiest meth head that you broke into this place without this guy home, because if there's somebody, this guy's seen combat, I don't know how many fucking times, who wouldn't have blinked an eye to end the threat in his home, and we're just like, that guy, he'll never know how lucky he is. You know, the cops ended up coming, taking the guy away and this guy, my friend was just not home.

But it's like. Imagine if that same guy would have broken to my sister's house, which is another Navy person. And her husband is a retired Lieutenant Colonel that has been to war six times. I know that for a fact, she had six kids by him. It's different. Those two people together is a different situation.

Those two people are different. Combat people. Is different. My sister, I knew my sister was different before she even went to the military. My sister literally, genius, graduated from one of the highest decorated high schools, could've went to any Ivy League college in the world.

She said, no, I'm going to the Navy for some special ops thing that she never talks to me about. Came home and my sister could do 200 pushups. God damn. Straight, and I was like, wow, the game has changed. Yeah. My sister came home and she was, my sister looked like a problem

when she came home from basic training. I was like, yo, I don't like, It's just working. My mom like, yo, I don't think you should yell at her. Cause she was like, about nothing. The dishes, I do the dishes. My sister looks like serious business. Yeah, I mean, people who have been in the military

and who have combat experience, that's also one of those things that's like, it's a different animal. It's a different mindset. You can't, nobody who hasn't can really relate to it. It's like hunting. Yeah. You don't know what you can do until you actually do it

and you in it. It's one of those things. Like with this, I wasn't gonna let myself drown. Like I knew I was, you know, cause I can swim really, really good. But it's the fact that even when I'm hurt, it went right to the, if I was further out, it went right, when you first learned to swim,

being on a swim team, you learned to swim with one arm. You learned to swim with the kickboard, with just your feet, with your arms gotta be to the side. All of this stuff comes into your mind when you're actually doing something. The reason why we were getting out at that time, because how you die in the ocean is from exhaustion. My son was looking like he was tired,

because we was out there for a while. I was like, yo, let's just go into the pool. Just sit by the pool for a minute. And that's how we ended up coming in. I'm still like, man, if, I can imagine if I couldn't swim in a wave. Scary. Oceans can be terrifying too.

I mean, I remember I was swimming in the ocean. We were staying on a beachfront place for like a month and this is like two summers ago, I think one summer ago. And I became my routine that I would go out in the morning and I would enter the ocean and then just swim down and then exit, you know, or, and man, a few times I would wear like a and then exit, you know, or, and man, a few times I would wear like a sun protective shirt, you know, like one of those like, but they, they start to weigh on you. They feel heavy. And I would do it without, like some people would do that

swim with paddles because like you can propel yourself more. And there was times where like just the ocean, the ocean just pulls you a little in this way and you feel like hints of panic. Like, am I getting pulled down right now? You know, it's just like it's a flash of panic and you're like, you got to like tell yourself, don't panic. It's like a message to yourself because you can feel it, you know, and then maybe a wave hits you once, you know, not like the way it hit you, but just where you get hit down and you're like, and I remember just being like, maybe I should fucking try to swim to shore right now, you know, because I'm not that far out.

Far enough. You're like, I'm far enough to like, yeah. But then the thing that you said happens is like, you're like, oh, wow, I feel like I'm fighting this current. And then your fatigue starts to raise. So you're like, oh wow, I feel like I'm fighting this current, and then your fatigue starts to raise. So you're like, oh. So then you have to coach yourself, like, hey, don't exhaust yourself

to try to fight this current right now. All this is happening at the same time, you know? And I remember a couple times finishing that swim and getting out and being like, you know, maybe I should go with someone. Like, maybe I should like bring a fucking friend to do this because. And you're freestyling, right?

Yeah, and but like you kind of get out and you're like, you look back at the ocean and you're like, I wasn't out that crazy far. I wasn't doing something so crazy, but you realize how vulnerable you are to whatever the fuck happens there. And being alone is how people lose their life or get in big trouble there. Just point a reference, wrong stroke for the ocean.

Yeah. Breaststroke, always breaststroke for the ocean. Breaststroke. Yeah, that'll calm you, that'll always calm you because you're going kind of like with the current. Right. And when you, the thing what throws you off is when you see how far you are and you know,

like I don't think I was that far out. And like your, what is it called, distance, the radius, like have your range of distance, you're like, I don't think. But when you're breast stroking, it's like you can control it, like you see everything. Freestyling is, in the ocean is. Oh sorry, I was breast stroking, I thought you meant,

I didn't know you were breast stroking. You were breast stroking. Oh you was definitely in panic mode. Yeah I was panicking. Yeah you was panicking. I was panicking. If you can see, and you up and down the current, with just your shirt, it's all these things.

If something would've touched you, you'd have fucking lost it. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it was happening. See, we're on your feet, you're looking at me, you're stroking real hard. He's like, yo, man, my son, my son, he's like, yo, dad, look at that stingray. Stingray is jumping out of the water, right?

Yeah. He's like, and this is his mind. He thought this was cool. So we out, Sting Ray is jumping, and he said, dad, look at those Sting Rays. Sharks have to be out there because the Sting Rays are jumping out of the water. I'm like, yeah, let's go in though.

Look at what you mean, sharks have to be out there. He's into all that. He loves it. Yo, they are jumping because sharks, I say, son, they're not that far away from us. Yeah. Yeah, they're not. And by the way, they can get here real quick.

Whatever's chasing them, we're right, son, there's no floor. Yeah. There's no, oh, I can look, and I made him keep his goggles on. And I said, man, I want you to be, can you look under the water, can you look? He's like, not really.

I said, so, man, stop saying shark shit. Yeah, yeah. Stop saying shark shit out there. Just chill with the shark. Let's go do some sand shit right now. Uh, what was I gonna say? I wanted to ask you this because before it wraps up, did, um, when did it occur to you

to embark on this epic thing that you're doing in standup of I'm gonna do multi-part, long form, how did the idea come to you? We did Domino Effect, it had a great response. This is part one. Part one. And so just to try, does part one, I'm assuming, is this like childhood like building? Okay. It starts in 1983. Okay. I'm 10. Okay.

And so when we finished with the first one, people start asking me, yo, what happened after that? I was like, what, like what happened? Like you stopped at a certain point, like what happened? I'm like, oh, okay. So we did two. And two got a huge response because two is, two is, two is different. Like when you look at all four together, but two is different.

Two is like, I still say, man, I shoulda worn an Emmy for two. I shoulda worn for four. Oh, I believe you. From what I saw, I mean, it really is, it's captivating, it's fantastic. When you're doing two, do you go, I'm gonna do, like you already know three, four, or is this?

I know three or four coming. You know they're coming. Yeah, because we're stopping at, I'm stopping at a certain point, because I know that this needs to be in three. So three is my favorite. Okay. It is absolutely my favorite.

I watched three recently, and it's one of these things. I can't really watch myself, but three is so funny to me because of where I was at. And three can give people an understanding about why I was so juvenile and mixed got on boots. Like, cause now you can see the connection. Like, okay, he's a, he's definitely oblivious to what's going on. That's why he was so oblivious when they saw,

man Scott, I don't post this. Like, he's not connected yet. I remember when I first heard that, it's so funny, dude. None of it. Basically, just to give some insight, that obviously there's all these words and terms and expressions that mean nothing to a civilian, right? And so when you're first in and somebody says something

as seemingly benign as Mexicans got on boots, and you're like, the fuck is that supposed to mean? Everybody here has on boots. Yeah, and then you learn that that means something very significant. Yes, this is something that you actually need to know. And this is observation. Like I've been, I thought my observation was keen when I was on the street, but this really made me different. That's why three is called the first day of school. Because everything I've learned in the streets,

everything I've learned in the home, this is where all of these things gonna have to merge and I'm gonna have to apply these skills. All of it to survive. To survive, like this is a, I don't have to try to figure out who's the danger. Everybody is the danger outside of myself. And how I respond to things and how I prepare for things in here is based upon how I'm living here for the rest of, for my 15 years that I'm in here. Yeah. So, I, um, it's nothing that you could prepare for. And I think that three kind of gives this glimpse of how dangerous this is going to

get and how still I am very, it's stuff going over my head still. I'm like, yo, this is, I mean, in three, this guy says that he's about to slap me and I have no idea that he's talking to me. Like I'm so oblivious. He's like, cause he's saying that I slapped his sister. He's making a problem with me. And I'm like, what? And I'm like, he said, cause when he says it,

he's in the cell, I'm in the Sally port. And he said, yeah, when you get in here, with your sister slapping ass. And so I looked down the hallway because there's other people in the hallway. I'm like, yo, who is this guy that slapped his sister? Like I'm so, it's so in my head. And this is the moment you like, you can go back

and like, this is Mexican on both. This is definitely where his mindset was because he is not a prison person at this point. He's like, he's a guy who just in here and like, oh, I guess somebody slapped his sister. And he's like, will you come in this cell? I'm like, is that guy coming over here? Like, I'm so oblivious.

And then when I get in, once I figure out that they talking to me, I'm like, what? I've never slapped anybody's sister. And I'm like, oh, so they trying to pick a fight with me. Oh, cool. And now I'm, well, I'm coming in there. And when I get in there, you better have the same energy that you have when I'm on this side.

So when I get in, I approach the dudes who was saying it, and he was like, you really wanna fight? I'm like, but you was saying all this stuff when I was outside? He was like, man, I ain't got nothing else to do. Well. I'm saying that is, like, I have nothing else to do. So he's like, I'm just jazzing with you.

That is kind of like, that is a heavy statement to think about the part of I got nothing else to do. It's like, I have nothing else to do. I'm gonna bother you. And that's it. And I remember when they used to bring and I don't really tell this story a lot, but they used to bring the kids to the prison, right?

And the officers knew I was insane. They like, yo, he is a nutcase. Ali, we about to bring the kids through. I said, what? He said, we about to bring, because it's like scared straight. Oh, scared straight kids, yeah. They just about to bring the kids through the prison.

The best. And I was like, cool. And I wake my celly up, I'm like, yo, big man, they about to bring the kids through. He's like, word? He said, what are we doing, one or two? I said, let's do one. And I'm like, how much time, see how much time I got? He's like, 10 minutes.

Now we just at the scene. I'm all oiled up, gloves on, and I'm standing at the bar, standing right at the bar. My celly, my celly seat, big C, big C is like maybe six, six, seven, maybe about 285, and they come through with the kids, and I'm standing at the bars. And I'm like this, I'm standing at the bars. So yeah, young troublemakers, you know what I'm saying? Just know when you coming here, it's on baby,

you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I'm taking everything. And I'm at these bars greased up and this huge dude is in the back with the sheets pulled up talking about, and he'll do it, and he'll do it. These kids like, oh my goodness,

it's a little one taking the big one. Oh shit. Them kids like, yo, I don't, you would see them go down and they do not want, because they gotta walk the whole run. They don't wanna come back and I'm standing at them bars. See, but we laughing. But you also changed some kids' lives with that.

You know what I mean? You laugh, but they laugh, they're like, I'm gonna start going to school, I'm gonna start doing my shit. I'm like, oh me and Ceezy, like, maybe we'll be doing one or two. I'm like, we are insane. There's nothing better than Scared Straight.

Oh my goodness. The original. Yeah, the original was crazy. The original, well, there's an original original. Yeah, the original original, the one I saw. Yeah, the one, yeah, and then there was one other one that aired one time that I became obsessed with, which was Scared Straight 99. And then there was other shit after that that was bullshit. But 99... Was the dude who said that he was gonna eat your salad.

That dude, the guy who was like, he was like, hold my pocket and made the kids walk holding the pocket. Those guys, dude, when he was telling some kid to apologize and he was like, and as he was saying apologize, he was spitting like incidental spit, not like, but like, you know, when someone talks fast and spit, he's like, I know you don't like this. You like calling kids facts. Like it was unhinged.

It was unhinged. But you saw that all the kids that came in with bravado were like, like it did had the effect. They were like, I cannot come back here. It was effective. By the way, do you know that like, I've heard other parents say this, I have two boys and there's six and eight,

are just like obsessed with like, what's going on in prison and jail. Like it is, I come home and my sister's at the house right now and she's like, ah, so are you putting the boys down tonight? I go, yeah, I just got in. She's like, so last night we covered jail, prison, and then my six-year-old goes, and federal prison.

And I go, yeah, it's good that we have the distinction of the three different things. And their questions are endless. And I guess it makes sense, because I know when you're little boys, usually you're like cops, fire trucks, right? And then you go, cops put bad guy in jail. So then they go, what's jail?

And then you go, well, you know, this jail is where you go and they lock you up. And then they're like for years. And then you're like, well, you know, that'd be like prison, what's prison? And then they're like, now they're like, and what sound does it make when the cell closes? I'm like, the fucking sound?

I go, I don't know, it's metal clanking. And they're like, can you play it? I have to like look fucking sound? I go, I don't know, it's metal clanking. And they're like, can you play it? And I have to like look up sound of a metal playing. And then they're like, what do you eat? I'm like, whatever they give you. When do you eat? I go, when they fucking tell you. And then they're like, what about showers? What about going outside? And I'm like, yeah, can you just put on a fucking documentary? This is all covered. But it's just, it is endless. And then they're like, who's in your cell? I'm like, a guy that also did some shit.

And they're like, is he your friend? I'm like, you better fucking hope so. But it just is endless, man. It's endless. They have so much curiosity. And it stops me from getting upset with interviewers when the first thing they wanna ask me about is prison. Cause I actually designed my career not to ever,

I'd never talked about prison until Mexicano Boots. I had been doing stand up like 17 years. At that point? Yeah. I had been doing stand up since 1998. Wow. These are really December 97, but it turned 98. I got out in October 21st of 1997. Oh, so you went right to it. I went right to it. I'm on Comic View 18 months after I'm released.

No shit. Yeah, I quit my job and everything in 1999. I mean, I assume the answer is yes, but do you have any, I don't know, like inkling that this is something to pursue? Like do you, you know what I mean? Like you're in prison, so do you just know because you're good at communicating and storytelling?

I'm in prison, this is what I was. I was the jovial, sarcastic guy. Yeah, I see that. That would sit there and be like, so that's what y'all about to do? I said, let me tell you, I just wanna ask, y'all about to fight, right? I just wanna know something.

Who's willing to lose two fights today? And they like, I don't know what the fuck you talking about. I said, well, hey, hey, hey, don't be mad at me. One of y'all are gonna lose, somebody's gonna lose. And then the COs are gonna come in and beat the shit out of One of y'all are gonna lose, somebody's gonna lose. And then the COs are gonna come in and beat the shit out of both of y'all. So somebody has two losses today. Two losses today.

And it's like, ugh. So you're also kind of the logic guy. I'm the, like, yo man, like, what are we doing? And I- And did you love comedy? Were you like a comedy fan? I loved comedy before. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. From what I love comedy for yeah, I'm saying what I had you know

I'm 19 like I went to written like I'm locked up like 48 that I'll turn 19 right my birthday is October 17 October 21st, I'm locked up. Who's big when you get locked up like who's the big it was? deaf jam had Been out. Okay, and it was it was no actually one person at that time. It was, Def Jam had been out. And it was no actually one person at that time. It was everybody. The scene. It's the, I'm comedy from like Carol Burnett and like, I'm watching all of them growing up.

Cause like when people say, my first introduction to comedy was this. My first introduction to comedy was Carol Burnett. I wasn't listening to no Richie Pryor album at that time. She was fantastic. She was fantastic. Police Academy, airplane, like all this shit is hysterical to me as a kid.

So I'm not, oh, I found Richie Pryor. The first thing I ever listened to from Richie Pryor was Blacksmith. That was the album that my dad had, right? But I had also heard Don Rickles. I had also heard a Red Fox album I had heard a lot of things and Sammy Davis Jr. was on the Jeffersons and I knew he was a entertainer he was a comic a dancer so it was a lot of people that

was funny to me but the storytelling ability comes from my family yeah I've always this is how you learn things. This is how you get told stories. This is what you get before punishment. That was the worst to get a story right before you finna get spankin'. So let me tell you why this is this. I don't give a damn.

Just. Yeah. Amuse you real quick and then I'll hurt you. Okay? My grandmother, you know what and then I'll hurt you. Okay? My grandmother, you know what, let me tell you why. You wanna know why I would be your ass? Because, like, 19, 19, shit, what was it, 42, 43? I don't, I don't, so I have the documentary

in front of my ass. So this was the thing, so telling a story just comes from my family. The series comes from people asking what happened next. I don't wanna tip, because you haven't seen two. I know, I haven't seen anything but four. Two. This is what my thing is about too.

I didn't know how much it would heal other people from the prison that they were in with what I spoke about and it released a lot of people and and that was the reward for me. It's all walks of life, it's all colors, it's all... when somebody comes to me as a yo man for real I watched Domino effect to my family Healed because of this because it was something that you talked about and you went so deep into it

That we Healed because we had never discussed that same exact situation. And it just goes, it's like it's swept under the rug, but it's so poignant in how you conduct the rest of your life. It was a major turning point. I mean, it's inspiring for someone, I'm sure too.

I skimmed some some comments on four and a lot, I saw a lot of people being like, you know, man I did time and they're like this was such an experience for me because like it brought back my memories, it made me cry at times, maybe like so many people connecting with the story, you know, because like most people obviously who serve time aren't gonna have a voice or a platform to share that. And it's, look, whatever it is, even not about assigning culpability, it's traumatic.

It is a traumatic experience. You know, whether you want like, there is a trauma to being incarcerated. Yeah. And so most people who get out, probably most of them never see or hear a story, unless they're just like, you know, having lunch with someone, talking about it,

but like to see a performance that like tells the whole story. I'm sure it really does help be like, oh, somebody else can really connect with me on this. Cause it would be like with me, it's the things that you cannot see, it's the scars that you can't see. Yeah. You know like all the stuff that people talk to me about about prison sometimes I used to get really irritated when people like well did you use comedy to protect yourself? Like man do you know how fucking crazy I am? Like bro I don't need no fucking crazy I am. Like, bro, I don't need no damn,

and I welcomed whatever challenge somebody wanted. Like, man, do you see my face? Do I look like somebody that can run over me, dude? Like, that's a real fucking question. And don't ask me some shit that you saw on a movie on House Party, because Richard Pryor's never been to prison. Just, I keep saying that to every Pryor.

Richard Pryor's never been to prison, so get that stupid shit out your head. Use the comedy beat to say something. Get the fuck out of here. But they don't never get to the point where they understand, you know, that I haven't went into a restroom and not turned on water

so I could hear noise in order to use the restroom. I've been out about to be 27 years. And that still is. And I still have not done it. I've never been in a restroom and it's totally quiet. Even in my house, I still turn on water. I still turn on the fan. I gotta hear some type of noise and that's how crazy that place is. I was using the restroom quietly for 19 years without any type of noise. The prison was there for six years. Cannot use the restroom

without noise. We on year 27. That's wild. That's the unhitting, those are the hidden scars. Yeah. Like the hidden scars is like man, if you in front of me talking crazy, I'm not saying nothing to you because I am plotting your death.

Yeah. Because I'm like what are we doing? I haven't even thought about a fight because I know in this place I never thought about it. Yeah. Because I'm like yo, this is all, this is all life like shit. Like nothing registers to me the same.

It's like going to war, coming back. Yo, you wanna get your ass whooped. There are people on the side of the street that be wanting to do your windows. Some of them are veterans. Yeah. It's, it's disheartening that a lot of veterans are on the street. I'm saying homeless, our homeless population is, it's a lot of veterans in there.

I've seen somebody get they as told up disrespecting that man at the thing. He just said, man, I'm going to watch your window. Flipped out and have grabbed them out of the car and mangling them, not even punching them, just slamming them around in their window. And I was like, crazy. Here you go $10, bro. Remember my face.

It's like, oh man. I'm a good guy. I wanna keep talking to you, I have to pee really bad. So you can go do that. I'll be right back You're you're Texan, right? Yeah, Houston, Houston You still live there? Yeah, still live down right down the street. Really two hours. That's bad, right? Yeah, man I'm never moving from here. Like we was a gym that nobody knew about it. We was like, yo and It I think people don't understand

how segregated the cities are. Like we were like, well Austin, like fucking Houston, you're fucked by Austin? Yeah. Never have. Super, super, yeah. It's like Austin's better. Houston's a wild place to me.

Like that's a wild city. Big as fuck. I don't think some people don't understand how bumpin' Houston is. Yeah, Houston is insane. It's an insane city. You can live there, I can never see you ever. Oh yeah, 100%.

This city is very manageable. You know what I mean? Austin is very manageable. Austin, San Antonio. Easy to get around, very easy. This is, Houston is so big that it's places that are Houston that put you 45 minutes away from Austin. Wow.

It's still Houston. Yeah, that's, I get, I mean, there's like feelings you get in certain cities where at times you feel overwhelmed by the city. And I've felt that in Houston at times where I'm like, it's just like, holy shit. You know, LA, I lived in LA 19 years, and at times you're just like, man, this is just so spread out, so massive. And you drive an hour and you're still,

you know, you've moved six miles know, it's just so spread out, so massive, and you drive an hour and you're still, you know, you've moved six miles, and that's kind of like, Houston kind of feels like to me, too. The reason why LA is like that, because LA people can't drive like at fucking all. Like, I don't understand the type of space that they put in between cars. Like, in the rule book, it say like one car.

It's like 14 cars, which makes it, I'm like, I be in there, I'm like, yo, this traffic, it's not traffic, it's no traffic! Cars, the LA conditions you to shit, because cities will condition you, like any environment. Like in New York, it's funny, because you're in New York, and someone's like, hey, meet me for lunch down here. And you're like, all right.

And you just walk out of your hotel and you walk 20 blocks without thinking about it. You're just like, oh yeah, I'm on 41st. And you just kind of keep walking. And in LA, you realize it infects your brain. They're like, meet me on the next block and you get in your car. And you're just like, you just drove like 100 yards.

And you're like, the fuck am I doing? It's like, it doesn't even occur to you till after that like, people don't walk to shit in LA, nothing. Like they won't walk like three blocks. A lot of times people get in their cars to do everything. So it's just like this over congestion. There's 50 million cars in LA. Now, of course you need it because things are very spread

out, but you don't need it for every trip you make. Like Austin, people walk in Austin. It's a walking city, for sure. It's a walking city, people ride bikes here. That's an active city, I always feel like, this city makes you feel like a fat piece of shit all the time because all you see Everywhere are shirtless dudes running and biking and you're just like, alright, I'll fucking I gotta Yeah, yeah, it's so active. Yeah. It's like you're doing so much man. Just fucking chill out

Houston is that we know we know it is the fattest city. Yeah. Yeah, we got a lot of restaurants. Yeah, yeah. And a lot of ranch. If you, if you go, say if it's a woman, I've told my friends, my female friends, you wanna move to Houston, cool. Lose 20 pounds.

Like lose it and then move. And then move here. Because you're a single woman and you're gonna be dating If you date any dude from Houston, you're gonna probably eat four times in one date Damn, you're gonna eat four times an eating city. It's a eating day You're first of all, you're going to eat but y'all gonna stop by have some drinks. Oh, you're gonna have some food there They then you're going to do they released the fattest cities in America lists and I think like four of the top 10 were in Texas.

Yes. Yeah, they're like, oh yeah, bunch of people just stuffing their faces down there. Yeah, we're like, we're big people. Yeah. And then you get there, you're like, there's not a lot of people that's fattier. You're like, no, you haven't.

Yeah. You need to explore a little more. But the problem is, they never say that they fat athletic. When they're athletes too. They add the people in, they always just fat say, but you have some big boys. They can move. We lead in football.

Like we produce football players. It's SEC baby. Yeah, so you gotta think, yeah it's a bunch of, yeah, Heat 340, but he runs a 40, he runs a 5-2, or a 4-3-40. Have you seen this fucking guy dance? Like somebody's dudes are like 340

and they're just like doing their shit and they're like, look at this fucking guy, it's crazy. It's like, yo, and then you got Katy. So in Katy, it's a bunch of fat white dudes that play football. Yeah, they can move. And you can't Katie, it's a bunch of fat white dudes that play football. And you can't get, they got a dominating line and everybody's a draft pick. I remember when one of my sisters went to Ole Miss

and I'd never been there. So I fly in to Oxford and everywhere they went, everywhere we went, every meal, they're like, you want ranch dressing with that? I was like, what the fucking milkshake? Like it was just like ranch, ranch was like the offer for everything. So many things were deep fried and ranch,

but it just felt like such a caloric excess. You know what I mean? Like everything was ranch. I hate ranch. Really? So much. Like I've never. What dressing do you choose?

Like for salad? Yeah. Oh, balsamic vinegar. Or I'm gonna go French dressing Thousand Island something to that nature, but If I'm eating like I'm dipping wings or something blue cheese all day. Yeah. Yeah, that's the joy Diaz Famous line is it's blue cheese with wings or go fuck your mother Yeah blue cheese mustard on a fish sandwich.

I don't really eat ketchup with my fries. Are you super anti-mayo also? This feels like this is like this racial line where people check out what the mayonnaise people are doing right now. And I'm like, what the fuck? It's a condiment. I didn't realize that many people hate mayonnaise turkey a turkey sandwich with mayo with

mayo it has to be okay thank you that's all I wanted to hear why would you not put mayo on a turkey I've heard people just be like it's it's like this descriptor thing where it's like but let me see we guess you like mayo and you're like I mean yeah on certain things. Like. On a turkey sandwich, for sure. Fantastic. Or a roasted chicken breast sandwich, you got a mayo. Mayo. Now, salami, fried salami sandwich,

mustard and mayo. Tuna sandwich, if you give me tuna sandwich, and mustard and mayo not on there, you can keep that shit. Like, where's the mayo? So nothing's gonna lubricate this goddamn sandwich. It's just gonna... And then there's like, there's,

I never had like the French style. Essentially it's Thousand Island. Thousand Island is basically ketchup and mayo. And that for like French fries, after I had that, I was like, this is the fucking greatest. Oh man, it's, oh man. Let me tell you. Decadent. We do food, I was like, this is the fucking greatest. Oh man, this, oh man. Decadent. We do food, yeah.

Like Texas, we do food. Austin has a pretty good- It's a good food scene. Pretty good food scene. Yeah, I mean they can find a lot of shit. And if you can't find a restaurant, we got a truck for you. Yeah, that's right.

Got a truck village. Like, it's like, street food, it's like man, it's like, it's street food. It's like, man, it's like being in Korea. When I was in Korea, it was like a lot of street food, a lot of places to eat. I'm like, yo, this is the fucking best. Is it, is your, do you have a favorite cuisine? Is there something that like you've always,

you're drawn to the most? Ah, man, I eat a lot of food. Yeah? A lot of West Indian food, a lot of Thai food, a lot of Asian, like I eat a lot of food. Like my palate, like my children's palate, it's like a lot of food, a lot of vegetables, a lot of stuff.

Like I don't even know, we eat more things than people even know exist. Yeah. Yeah, like we eat a lot, man. We eat a lot of things. Then I grow a lot of stuff. You do grow a lot of stuff? Oh yeah, man, I was heavy.

I always been heavy into gardening. So that's from my family. Like I was growing. Let me tell you, man, I was so, I was so, I mean, I hated when the pandemic was over. Like I just hated it. It was so nice to have you. And I was, I didn't have to rely on anybody

to tend my garden because I'm there and I'm just there. Now I just got this new property, right? And the first thing I did, I started planting the food first. Peach trees, pear trees, it's two countries already, the grapes, limes, lemons, figs, blueberries, everything, right?

The grapes take off first. So now it was a bunch of grapes out there. So I got people painting the house, structured people doing it. I've noticed and I keep asking them, they like, no, no, no, man, never touch the grapes. Then why are they missing? Like, is so many grapes missing?

Like, and I know that they're eating these grapes. My friend come over, Jay Knapp, and he in the back, he's like, he walking around, man, this is a nice property, man, he doing good. And he's like, these grapes? I'm like a nice property man. He's doing good anything. He's great. Yeah Seedy grapes eat ground Well, I walk around the front I come but he has a hand like a bunch of races like yo So yeah, it is you gonna you gonna be able to people gonna be able to come over here and just

Get pears and peaches. That's awesome Great, like I'm into I don't I don't need no floral stuff outside I'd be food food and so if they can homes they and the food that you grow I mean can't be it man. My okra was a sweet had the sweetest seeds inside of it. It's just I don't know I think that the piece of I think that the piece of growing things and knowing about things and then going on stage and telling people like, yo man, let me tell you, I watched some vegetable porn last night.

Oh, these were people who like grow food, they know, understand. Like, I watched corn growing. Corn is a very erotic vegetable. To watch it grow. Yeah. Because corn, in order for corn to grow, it has to be close. So corn, they like, you got to plant corn tight because they want to brush up because it's a real freaky vegetable. Yeah. And then the more, the tighter they are, the more they can bump up against each other. Yeah. boom, boom, you get great corn. Okra is like, get the fuck away from me. Like, I don't wanna talk, stop touching me.

Really? The plants be right next to each other, you see the, they like, I don't know. Just talking about this reminds me that I haven't had corn on the cob in a while. I love fresh corn, throw it on a grill, some seasoning. I mean, I could just eat one after the other, man. You know, they have great street corn here.

Yeah. Great street corn. Really, I should get some. Oh man, they have great street corn. Guys, let's make a corn run. Yeah, for sure. So when you watching things, and then you realize in nature, it gives you, with comedy,

I wanna be able to talk about so many things. And when I come out, I'm telling a story, and I start off by, let me tell you something, I'm in a war right now, like a real serious, serious, serious war, like this is, but it's the slowest war I've ever been in, like it's like, and I'm losing. And people like, what the fuck is he talking about? I'm like yo man I'm trying to keep these goddamn snails off of my

plants right and I'm booby trapping shit I'm doing everything they say do beer. They find their way. I'm putting salt all over this shit and I'm still waking up snails and I'm up at night and I'm taking them off the things. And then I go on the show, I'm watching the show and these giant snails have attacked this orchard. And they are up trying to save their apples and these snails are fucking doing their business. And they're huge. And so they just scraping all these snails off and then dude like, this is crazy. And I'm like, but my story is dead on it.

Yeah. And so when you think about like, how much time can you possibly do if you're telling stories that people can relate to or some information that people don't even know about? Like my man was like, yo, man, I remember you first said that corn shit. I wouldn't have looked at shit.

I'm like, corn is a freaky ass vegetable. Yeah. Like, I'm like, yeah. But he said remember you first said that corn shit. I wouldn't have looked at this shit up. I'm like, corn is a freaky ass vegetable. Like, I'm like, yeah. But he said if you would have never told the story. Exactly. I would have never. It's my favorite type of comedy to watch is storytelling, someone talking about their life, but I also love, here's the thing,

like specificity on things. Like, I'll watch a documentary, learn something, and then I talk about that on stage, it always turns into like a pretty good bit, like just sharing the thing, because what happens is then you get interesting, and interesting and funny always trumps just funny. Like if you go like, oh, I didn't know that about corn, like that's an interesting thing,

you're just, your level of engagement with it, I think it always is better. Like that you learn something and then you have the humor involved in it. So I love watching that stuff. And it's my favorite type of bit to develop is like, oh, I'm gonna share this bit of knowledge. So people are like, oh, you see people like lean in on it.

Like, oh shit, you know some shit. And I will be like, yes, do the corn shit. Do the corn shit. Corn this year, beans next year. Do y'all think corn nuts come from actual, it's an actual nut or you think it's hominy corn? They're like, I don't know. What is it?

It's like, I'll never forget my daughter, she's allergic to nuts, right? And I'm eating corn nuts, and she's like, that can I have some? So I put them on him, I'm like, oh no! Don't give her nuts! I'm like, I want you to educate yourself that this is corn.

This is not an actual nut. But it says corn nuts on it. I'm like, hmm, never ever heard of hominy. I don't know, that's the kind of stuff that I fucking love, dude. I love that. And this is the educated person. But I think when people think they educated,

you're not educated on everything. Of course not. You're educated on this shit you know. I was at a dinner and there was like, this guy is like a, some type of, I forget what level engineer, you know, like some nuclear engineer. And I go, I go, oh Jesus Christ, you know,

he's at this dinner table. I go, so I guess you're the, you're definitely the smartest guy here. And he goes, only about one thing. And I go, so I guess you're definitely the smartest guy here. And he goes, only about one thing. And I go, what? He goes, I mean, I'm smart about nuclear engineering, but that's it. And I go, oh, that's kinda, he's like, yeah,

so it's just, that's my expertise. I don't know everything else. Like, you know, if you're like, whoever knows nuclear engineering, stand up. He goes, that's me. But he goes, that's it. That's where my brain is. If you ask him, well, how to,

if you put ketchup and, what is that? He goes, I don't know. Ketchup? More ketchup? Light ketchup, ketchup light. He doesn't know shit. Yeah, and I- And I think that's the-

I love it. It was kind of, it was obviously a humble, modest thing but there's a there's a kernel of truth to it, too It's like the guy is saying like a lot of times you go like oh this guy's a you know He's a mathematician or whatever and you're like, you're the smartest guy. He's like, yeah about math About math. Yeah, and I'm like yo, um I'm pretty good at math and chemistry. I'm damn good. I was a street pharmaceutical rep.

I know both systems. I know business, I know economics. I know both systems. I know what an ounce can turn into. And I know how to bring something from nothing. I lost it, cold water. I mean, I always, almost always always with the exception of taking a test I've always been like much more

Drawn towards like street smart people and and like my own My own successes are from that skill set, you know I mean like the observation and then like navigating life then, hey, I got a 4.0. I'm like, yeah, I didn't. I didn't get a fucking 3.0. I didn't get a fucking 2.0. So it's like, books and everything, of course there's a lot to be learned,

but there's a lot of different types of intelligence. And I think that's one of the major things that intelligent people know that there's different levels of intelligence. Of course. People who think they're intelligent, like no, I'm the smartest one. Like yo, I get it.

You have recorded a lot of things in your head. Mm-hmm. But have you ever started something from absolutely nothing? Yeah. With no type of, it's a, you reading, you're, man, it's like this. If my grandfather can build a house from scratch,

he can build a house from scratch. You ever went to engineering school? No. You ever went to that? No. You ever did? No. Never did anything.

How you know how to build a house? From practice. Yeah, from 50 years of building houses. Yeah, like, how do you think that you smarter than this person? Like when people, we have, you have people in my family that in this time, it sounds crazy, like I remember this guy thought this was, like he was insulting me. Damn, your grandfather had a fifth grade education? Well, damn, he couldn't read for a fucking hundred years. Did you know that, right?

Like he's not, my grandfather is not 19. He's fucking 106. You understand? Like, no, he fucking had, yes, he had a, I don't even know how he got to the fifth grade. Like what was the grades? Like who was this person? It's like, fifth grade to him was everybody in the room, like little house on the

prairie. This man is never formally with the school. But everybody in the family from his point on going down, went to college, right? Went to some university, went to school, went to formal school and graduated, but still ask him for money. Right. He paved the way for all of your shit with no education and you still ask him for money.

Yeah. And you actually think that you smart in him. Who gives a shit about your paper and your degree? No, yeah. He's still the richest person in our whole entire family. Yeah, with a fifth grade education. Like, you can go to my grandfather and get a Susan B. Anderson, like when she was young.

Like you like, I know her. Like on the corner. Like I know her! She's on the corner. I can't believe this brother. Is your grandfather still alive? No, he passed. He passed, Jesus Christ. My grandmother, when she passed, she's on the cover. I can't believe this brother of mine. Is your grandfather still alive? No, he passed. He passed, Jesus Christ.

My grandmother, when she passed, she was 106. Fucking really? Yeah. God damn. I'm like, yo, these people live a long time in my family. Yeah, you have genetics, man. You're gonna be around. My mom is 70 now, and she's like,

I'm not gonna be here for long. I'm like, okay. But all her brothers are going towards 80, 89 years old. I'm like, you still got old aunts. You still got a lot of people that's still alive. Dude, imagine if you lived 50 more years from right now. That's so fucking long. You're 50 now.

Imagine doubling your lifetime right now. It's like, it's so much time. It's a lot of time to hopefully do something. 50 more years? 50 more years? But I'll take them, I'll take them. I remember I used to say crazy things when I was younger. Like man, 40 is the oldest shit.

I know, we all do. I'm 20 years old, fuck 40, just man, let me get to like, let me make it to 40 then I'm straight. Yeah. And then you get like 36, you got a house, you like no, no! Yeah, I want a little more of this life. No more, like so,

when it comes to parenting, I don't care if somebody's older than me or not, I've been having kids longer. Yeah. I've had children longer than you. Like my oldest son is 30, my oldest daughter is 25, I had children longer than you. So you telling me your goofy ass parenting shit,

I was like, oh, okay. Yeah. You do know I've been doing this a long ass time. Yeah. And my son's like, yeah, he's been parenting a long time. Yeah. And he's not an absentee parent,, he's been parenting a long time. He's not an absentee parent. Like, he's been parenting a long time.

So people that's older than me, they say, well, you need to do this. I'm like, okay, we'll see how that's gonna work. I promise you it's not gonna work. I bet my whole life that it's not gonna work. Month later, man, that shit didn't work. I told you, I fucking told you. But you think because you're older than me that you know about, I said, man, that shit didn't work. I told you, I fucking told you, but you think because you're older than me,

that you know about, I said, man, okay, I guarantee, I remember I told my friend, I said, hey man, I know you think your daughter's cool and shit right now. He was like eight or nine. Like yo, by the time she's 12, this is gonna be a demon's child. And I'm telling you,

and it has nothing to do with your upbringing. Oh man, her mom is this. I said, if you and her mom is ever at odds about something, if you better not show her. Yeah. Cause I'm talking about that one tink in the armor. Oh my goodness. Well, Ali, I don't believe.

Okay. Daughters daughters this go to private school all that shit I get it I get it perfect 14 he called me you fucking jinx me I think she snuck out the house I say bro let me tell you something you're fighting the hormone war yeah what is that the that? The same war they equipped you with this, you want to tell me what they equipped you with? Don't have sex because you're going to get a disease or you're going to get pregnant. Never has worked.

Never has worked in the history of saying shit. Never works. So you got to learn hormones. You got to learn hormones and you have to rationalize with them. You have to let them see it Hey, this is what I'm not telling what's gonna happen. Have you ever had this happen before? This is ten times worse than that. Yeah, like you have a friend that you've never that you don't talk to no more, right?

Yeah, her name is Samantha. Remember you Samantha was your best friend You don't talk to Samantha no more and then you cry for two days and I said I said now That was just a friendship Imagine giving Samantha your body He's a this is a male yeah, give it a male person your body and then they never speak to you again My daughter was looking at me with the crushed face like why would that happen? As it's called boys. Yeah.

And he was like, oh shit. Then it registers to her like, I need to keep myself to myself because I don't want this to happen to me. Not at this stage. Like all that boyfriend, girlfriend and shit, if that even becomes a thing, you're gonna lose your children faster

than you ever thought possible. What's a good age for it to start, you think? They need to get into maturity. Like, that 14, 15 shit, like, man, I'm like, yo, man, get the kids to 18. Have them focus on one thing, because even in friendships, even, like, man, I'm like, yo, man, get the kids to eight, have them focus on one thing. Because even in friendships, even in friendships, man, it's a, it's a loss factor in that.

That I don't think that people think, these are little adults, no, they're not. These are people that's growing into adulthood, but their mentality and what they see and what they go through, it's like, man, it's a lot of's like, man, it's a lot of fucking talking, man. It's a lot of being present in the moment.

And it's no, you can't get lost in this shit. Like in parenting, people get lost in, well, I can just let them do. No, you cannot. As soon as you let them do, something happens. Because it's other things being said to them that you have no idea that's happening because you're not present all the time.

You have to be in the know with them. I'm so happy that right now I'm in this era of six and eight where it doesn't feel like the gravity of teen stuff, because teen shit just, it feels so heavy. Right now I have like two little dudes who are just like, did you get us any toys while you were gone? And you're like, yeah, yes. That's all they wanna do is just like play,

because that shit, I don't know. I have friends obviously with older kids and it's just it just feels so much heavier and playing should be Socially playing and socially understand should be the best thing for them right now. Yeah Like Hassan my youngest son. He's 13 He has absolutely no type of street in him at all like none yeah and I love it like I love like I call him corny all the time with so much affection like you're just a corny little dude but I just love it this is how corny is if I told my oldest son because he's grew up in a different environment I told my son hey man you gonna have to hustle if I told my oldest son because he's grew up in a different environment I told my son a me you gonna have to hustle

If I told my son that I'm gonna be at the police station cuz he's like you told me though. Yeah Because hustle means something so different to him. Yeah, I said this I said I saw you gonna have to learn the hustle That man looked me in my eyes and said what my feet He's doing a drill yeah and he's doing basketball. Like, oh. But that also, I'm sure, warms your heart a bit, that he's so far removed from how you grew up that the idea of hustle is like, run faster?

Like, try something? Try? Like, my oldest daughter, she's a swimmer, right? She's a great swimmer. All these medals, all this world, and then right in the middle of that, she said, hey, I wanna go to culinary school. Like, she's in middle school.

She's like, I don't really wanna swim anymore. I just wanna go. I said, well, just swim through high school. Just do it, you know? Came a lifeguard, you know, she accumulated all this money while she was, because she couldn't spend it, because I was just taking care of everything. When she was 18, Jayden had an abundance of money.

When she got ready to go to school, she was like, I'm just going to go to college school. I paid for that. She still lifeguards, even though she's a chef. She's like, I'd do it if I don't have anything to do, but I'm so consumed with my kitchen. So me looking at her prepared me for Helena. Helena, I knew Helena was gonna pick something crazy that nobody in the family does and we're gonna have to support any.

Walking through the mall, she said, they don't want an ice skate. Okay. Put to ice skate. Okay. Put in ice skating. A week later, she's on the ice skating team. Six weeks later, she's in the competition. She is second place in the competition. A month later, she's in another competition.

She wins first place. Then she comes, she goes to Dallas and wins another competition. She's in first place. She has a competition on the 31st. And she comes, she goes to Dallas and wins another competition. She's the first place. She has a competition on the 31st and she's dedicated to ice skating. Like it's like a button clicked. She's so dedicated to it. And my talks are different. When it was her sister, Hey, listen, you're going to have to go out and win. We're here, hey, you're gonna have to go out and win. In my mind, we the only black people in this pool.

You know what I'm saying? You're gonna have to win and show them that we can fucking swim. You know what I'm saying? And she was winning and doing her thing. My conversation with Alaina is, hey listen, go out there and do your best, man. You know, as long as you make yourself proud,

man, your daddy gonna be proud of you no matter what. The conversation is totally different because I understand, I'm not putting any pressure on her. You're not ice skating to take care of this family. You're ice skating because you choose to. You know what I'm saying? You boxed my son, my 13 year old box. It's because you choose to. You box my son, my 13 year old box. It's because you want to.

Whatever y'all wanna do, I can support that because I've learned with my older kids, I don't burn them out on anything. Because I was burning my daughter out on swimming. Like I was on some Olympic shit. Because she was so good. But her mindset was, man, I'm just doing this, man.

I just want to swim, and I want some races, I'm going to become a lifeguard. And my whole thing is, you become a lifeguard, I want you to learn things that you can always make money from. If you decide that you don't want to swim ever again,

you can still be an instructor, 30 hours an hour. Life again, you can still be an instructor, $30 an hour. Yeah. Lifeguard, you sit there, $27 an hour, because you was a head person. Then if you wanna not do none of that, you wanna just chill and just become a Coast Guard, get you $35 an hour, be in the Coast Guard.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So in my mind, it's like you, I made her do sign language. I make them do, now I make them learn multiple languages You're gonna you're gonna do that cuz I need you to learn that for just communication You know, it's just parents like with my god was like his son's uh, um Whatever his son is doing Oh running back I said hey put him in jazz dance Like what put him in jazz dance if He's like, what? Put him in jazz dance.

If you want him to have great fucking feet, put him in jazz dance. I don't give a damn what the sport is. Soccer, boxing, football, basketball. Jazz dance. Jazz dance. Cause they gonna have phenomenal feet. All of that has something to do with your feet.

You want them to be able to heal faster, make sure they swim. Swimming works all the muscles. So my guidance, make sure your kid learns sign language, man. Why would you do that? Okay, back when I was telling people, it was like what, 85, $86 an hour? Damn. Now it's like what, 102?

With a minimum of four hours. You go to a hospital It's people's deaf and hard of hearing people that come in there. They need translators. That's 400 bucks minimum. They're making minimum That's pretty crazy. It's like how it is so many other things That you can do To ensure that your child always has a means to support garlic Yeah, this is skills that you just give them shit. I need to fucking do My

Yeah, my big guy I feel like is he's like a he thinks about money's eight He's like I could do this and I could set like he's always thinking like what is the birthday His birthday is December 14th Sagittarius I don't even know as there's a capital Sagittarius. Yeah He's always thinking about like and also like he's like, oh, yeah, and then like, you know, Elon Musk did I'm like how you fucking know it cuz like they watch little clips of things and they they know he's always thinking like how can I Start a business which I'm like, how you fucking know that? Because they watch little clips of things and he's always thinking, how can I start a business? Which I'm like, it's... So, yeah, Sagittarius, my daughter, my oldest daughter,

the head business person who I run everything by, I'm someone, she run, if she comes in, she is the clean-up lady. Before she became a chef, while she was in the school, she was working as a hostess. She said, why are you doing that? She said, I wanna know this business from front to back. Like she has a master's in food science. Like, she's smart.

Like she, during the pandemic, she went back to school. Understanding every level of it. Every level, right? So she can build from the beginning. December 1st is her birthday. That's a sad. That's a sad We got a little business mind Your your Houston story reminded me of this. I just wanted to show you real quick For the first time we are seeing body camera video when Miami-Dade police say they were assaulted

by a quadriplegic man. A case so unusual, even the judge at first appearance seemed surprised. I have truly never seen a case like this. It happened May 1st. Police were called to the Southwest Miami-Dade home of Brian Amasta. What gonna be there today?

Also known as El Valiente, his stage name when he's performing music. According to the report, Amasta and his mother seen here in red were involved in an argument. But when mom is put a wheel. He just said. When we interviewed Amasa back then, he told us this. They claimed that I hit them with my wheelchair. Did you? I absolutely did not. The report stated that you spit at an officer. Right, so I suffered from acid reflux,

so I normally spit, and I spat like the totally different direction. But this is the video. You wanna listen listen enough? Also told us he felt humiliated during his arrest. Are you happy that he broke? Because he was separated from his motorized wheelchair which he says was damaged when it was put on a flat bed. You see one officer appearing to text someone joking that they were going to put him on the tow truck. Officers later seen inspecting their legs,

a master charged with two counts of battery on a law enforcement officer. It's pretty good story, right? I suffer from as a reflux. I do too. I knew he was going to be a hard way to go. Anytime that you in a wheelchair and you have tattoos, you have a sleeve, oh, you definitely going to be a hard way to go. Anytime that you in a wheelchair and you have tattoos, you have a sleeve,

oh, you definitely gonna be a hard way to go. Definitely gonna be a hard way to go. Man, that was, yeah, he definitely, I also too, it's like, it's just such human nature too, when they're like, did you do that? And people are like, no, I didn't do that shit. And then they cut right to like, fuck, like you did spit on what you're talking about.

That wasn't acid reflux you fucking asshole He's like did you hit him with your chair? He's like It's fucking fantastic Shit anybody I didn't do anything All right, we got to wrap up I'll go see Ali on tour Ali sadik comm for tickets on YouTube I mean start look up the domino effect. There are now four Separate stories. How many are more gonna come two more? We we one more for domino and then we switch into another series in the shadows All right. Well, you're absolutely prolific and this is it's so good and I really really mean this

I can't tell you how impressed I was with this It's really really good. Go look up the domino effect on YouTube. Go see Ali on tour. Thanks for coming today, man Finally, I know thank you. I'm at me on my Christina great glasses Christina. Are those the rosebud glasses? We'll see you guys next week We'll see you guys next week Don't call me no not a gon' Stop tellin' me daddy chill Stop comin' to all that stuff under my foes You got white women Please stop trynna make me look bad on this black woman You got south comin' to daddy under my foes You got sweet

Good disrespect for when you got somebody that uh Daddy, not a gon' tell daddy Chill, chill, chill, chill Daddy, not a gon' tell daddy Chill, chill, chill, chill Daddy, not a gon' tell daddy Chill, chill, kill, kill Daddy, I'm a go-getter daddy Kill, kill, kill, kill Daddy, I'm a go-getter daddy Kill, kill, kill, kill

Daddy, I'm a go-getter daddy Kill, kill, kill, kill Daddy, I'm a go-getter daddy Kill, kill, kill, kill Daddy, I'm a go-getter daddy Kill, kill, kill, kill Bro, I already told you guys that is real disrespectful You guys tell me that, bro

Don't be commenting no daddy chill Don't comment no not a gon' Stop telling me daddy chill Stop commenting all that stuff under my post You guys are like women Please stop trying to make me look bad on this platform you guys stop commenting daddy under my post you guys please