Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Live From Vancouver with Toby Hargrave-219-Your Mom's House with Christina Pazsitzky and Tom Segura

Episode Date: May 7, 2014

Oh the mommies are worldwide, yo! Even though Tina Jeans couldn't make it to Canada (Manada) Tommy Bunz still went up there and did what a single mom has to do. He found a man to help him out. The great Toby Hargrave sat in as a step mom and he was amazing! Toby and Tommy break down a crazy park landscaper, religious upbringings, parenting, heckling, Fill Her Ups, Would You Rathers and so much more. This ep really is the Moose's (Because Canada) T**s!

Yadogs I don't know who sent me this shit, but I fucking love it Thank you so much whoever made this. I'd love to point out who did I have no idea All right, so I'll try to make this as quick as humanly possible You'll notice that you don't hear Christina's voice right now. She is shooting Thanks for bearing with us during this difficult time Where we've made a great effort to continue the show, but the scheduling has been horrific She is coming

To do the show she will be on Friday's episode this week This episode that you're about to hear is from this weekend or this last week live from Vancouver had a great time Thank you to everybody that came out to the live podcast and also To those of you that came so you came to also see me to stand up You were fantastic Vancouver is always amazing So I really appreciate you guys for coming out Real quick Christina. Oh This week

Dark Star Lounge is Denver. We're doing the podcast in Denver on May what fucking day is that 8th? Thursday and then at the Highline in Seattle Friday now. Here's the deal I won't know for a few hours whether or not Christina can come obviously It'd be great if she can come. I have some great Guests who will either be our guests live at these shows or they'll be the guest host As this episode is so thank you for understanding. I'm sorry. Please come out and support me If Christina can't make it I desperately need you to be there

So please do come to the Dark Star Lounge in Denver or the Highline a bar in Seattle This Thursday and Friday Yoshi is coming to Seattle of another friend who's a surprise in Denver They'll both be great shows. I promise. So please come out Christina Additionally will be in Portland at the Fun House June 6 You can go to Christina comedy calm and buy those tickets there and it looks like she's going to Pittsburgh the week after for the improv there. So get on that shit Go see Christina. Let's see. Where else?

I'm obviously gonna definitely be at the Dark Star and the Highline the following week next week the 15th through the 8th through the 17th of May. I'm at go bananas and Cincinnati my home Town, please come out to see me at go bananas if you're in the greater Cincinnati area Then in June I got the Brea improv Followed by San Jose keep it in Cali and then a few weeks later Or no week after I don't fucking know but I'm going to Buffalo helium Buffalo June 26 or 20th, okay So there's that that's all the live stuff live appearance information and again, obviously

terribly sorry About Christina not being on this show and possibly these other shows. We're doing the best we can and we appreciate you understanding a Quick piece of business then a little footnote. Is that what they're called and then I'll give you the show Now there's this this is live from Vancouver the great Toby Hargrave joins me on it. Oh My god, this was the thing we did a filler up sealer shot spoiler. Sorry And it occurred to me afterwards because I was looking for who can we do it? And I went to the list of like people from British Columbia and I chose who I thought I was like, oh, this would be great. I chose

Carrie and Moss and Pam Anderson and then later on I was just walking around. I was like Not only do I think to have they been on before but I think they've battled each other before Anyways, it was an honest honest mistake and this is a serious issue. Obviously. We don't want to repeat fill her ups and seal her shuts and very very sorry about this. I mean, this is You know, this is our Watergate. This is a really big deal. So In the future, you know next time I'll choose two other obviously very different

Residents of British Columbia. I love Vancouver. Thank you again for coming out to this I hope you enjoy the show and hopefully We'll have Christina back real soon. Thanks guys lots of love. All right. Okay. Bye. Bye Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the comedy mix. Please be aware of the use of cameras cell phones and poor judgment is strictly prohibited Now sit back relax and enjoy your show Welcome to the comedy mix Vancouver's premiere stand up destination Consideration of the performers, please keep your camera conversation to a minimum

Then you're left here to a maximum And as always, turn off your goddamn cell phone Ladies and gentlemen, please remember the most important rule of all Pull your jeans up, make them high and tight Now welcome to the stage, the main Bobby who killed the other Bobby Paul Segura I Sorry to disappoint you guys. I killed Christina

Fuck She she was a nice lady I just want to pay respects to her real quick Okay, that's enough Thank you guys for coming out Christina. Who here who here doesn't know what the fuck they're at somebody? Okay Because sometimes people will come and I'm like asking them questions and then they're like, I don't know why we're here And I'm like, okay

So, yeah, I I just want to make sure this soundboard is can we can we can you guys help me out for a second and make sure this works? Right audio levels Okay, I got it. All right That was really low Is that no, okay Yeah Oh my god, you guys are so disgusting. Is that loud enough? No. All right, you again

Can you give me a little bit of juice in the sound room? Don't don't answer if you hear me, okay? No, huh Yeah, yeah, yeah the computer Yeah, so this I've spent the last hour sweating a lot I tried to I didn't have the right cable and then they sent me the Tommy Lee's and I was like the drummer From Motley Crew has a store here, and they're like, no, I just another dude named Tommy Lee who's just riding that wave So I went down there and that was closed and the guys like go as I wish I got it goes go to the future store He's like you don't know the future store. Is that where you learn English? No

And then what really that's too much here So anyways, I got the cable So I want to thank you guys for coming out. I've had a lot of diarrhea today and Yeah, if you're reacting to that you have no idea what you're about to step in I'm so happy to be here. I'm so happy you came out. I'm so sorry and Christina. Sorry that she can make it so she is shooting a television show and They just they don't let her leave and she tried to tell them which is I thought was hilarious She was like, but I have my podcast and they were like

You're shooting a fucking television show and she was like so And they're like, yeah, no you can't do that. So that's why she couldn't make it but I have fantastic replacement and he is a local a native if you will he is a comedian he looks Oddly enough like Christina a lot You'll see him in the new a bdc series intruders. He's a hilarious comic. He's a good friend of mine

Please welcome to the stage. Mr. Toby Hargrave everybody let him hear You know, hey, so much like my wife it scares me Yeah, start drinking that yeah, so that's a look I didn't know who was in the green room when I first got back there. I was like, oh shit. What happened to your life? But then you're like acting The one thing that makes me look homeless. Yeah, it's the one thing keeping me from being homeless. Isn't that amazing? Yeah, I actually had I really like I had a little just just downtown here and we had our recycling bin

It's a like in a locked gate. Yeah, and I have all our recycling and I'm sorting all the bottles We leave our cans and beer bottles for all like the homeless people to go by Yeah, and I'm sorting them out and it's homeless. You came up behind me like hey, man, who's your bottle? Okay, cool, cool. Let me just walk away You're homeless Jesus, it's an amazing look. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. I don't know if it was a thank you, but it's No, but you're shooting for can you talk about it or no? No, can you talk a little bit about it is it on the comedy mix website?

Well, yeah, it's called insurers will be on BBC and we're filming it and it's like it's like it's like What's x-files? That's awesome. Like a new x-files. I'm very happy sexier people. You should give them a round I Mean you also had a baby, but show business is so much more important I didn't just have a baby, but fuck that fuck that shit kid. They all look the same They do kind of Yeah It's good. Like but like literally our kid her name's Thea. She's a girl and

And He's thea th ea. Okay, I have a list which is why I picked it But now everybody thinks I'm saying see ya my shit. Are you fucking kidding me? Like I said my entire life was a list of see it. Anyway, no one but She's really cool. And so she's really How can boring? Yeah And dumb dumb fucking smart like a coke machine that kid. Yeah, I tell you It's it's it's awesome that she I always I always think I that like white trash

people, you know Have a lot of kids because they're like that thing's done like me, you know, like We're just like I relate to them when they're new So Once they're forming smart me me dumb you're dumb this all works out They have their fucking 19 kids in County or whatever Thank you There's a segment we do on the show called those people should kill themselves

We'll start with that family and anybody that has close to that many I mean if you have more then two kids So we're good right now you and me. Yeah, I mean what how many times you need to see yourself like fucking Yeah, but this kid looks nothing like me so you should try came out and was adorable And I was like thank Christ. Yeah, that's adorable. This doesn't work Yeah, like nobody can see me at home, but like I'm like hey, I'm not you Jack Black This as a woman is the hideous fucking woman It's not the best guy either, but it's just not the best woman at all

You're a father. Yeah, is that did it totally change everything? Nope. No Here's the deal No, she just You know Sarah was pregnant for nine months and has this huge like this incredible relationship with his being that was inside of her Yeah, inside of her and I had no part of it Like I was there to see it and it was a beautiful experience to see my wife go through that and change a little bit But then the baby came out and I'm like that good good is breathing right all right good good

Like don't get me wrong like if there's a room full of babies fuck. I'm picking mine Like that's the baby. I'm gonna choose but You're getting to know the baby still like I don't know it could be an asshole like I don't know what she is I don't know if she could be a bitch. I don't know what it is. I wish more people said that about their kids You know because your kid your kid I mean sometimes like I've realized that some parents that are like in their 60s will be like, you know, like my son Whatever Paul you're like, yeah, how is it? They're like he's kind of a piece of shit It took them like 30 years to figure it out. Yeah, it'd be cool if parents were like, yeah, that kid's three months

He's a piece of shit But it'd be funnier if you just jumped again, right he's always shitting a fucking dance down I like that half of these people probably hate me already like no, they don't they don't much Now, you know, okay, see yeah, no, no, no, just be quiet keep it awkward good All right, there's so much to cover guys Where are we Vancouver is so much to cover here in the great whatever white north province of the thing That's right Yeah, it's great you're so great to see so many

Clippers fans Are we in the no fun zone all of a sudden all three black people in Vancouver All right, what do you guys say we do a proper show open are you cool with that Here we go, welcome to live from Vancouver your mom's house. Here we go Don't do in the park Do it in some other area, but don't do the park get plenty of Bear Hills over here, but don't do the park This is just fucks off the landscaping got your shovels you got all this shit I have to come over here and tear up all this shit spent eight nine hours doing this

I get calls from the public all over your stick Okay But yeah, the tree stuff that's absolutely fucking no go that pisses me off You know This is me off Welcome to your house I

Really does mean a lot that to me that you guys came out especially considering the circumstances This was a lot of fun to put together. Did you hear could you understand what that guy was saying? Trees Stick the grunt of the tree. Let me paint a picture for you So it has snowed. Okay, it has snowed wherever the fuck this is and This guy that you know when it snows he makes it clear what happens every time it snows my dick takes a beating with the shit What

We'll get into that so It snowed and snowboarders decided we should snowboard on the snow And it's in a park So, you know, they're like, yeah, there's fresh snow on the railings and on they're like, well, let's let's just do this Yeah, and they're doing that he I guess is like the maintenance guy of the park so he comes in he's like don't do it in the fucking park and I think I lost count at how many times he said don't do it in the fucking park Like around 20 like it's like, you know, I'm saying for him is that he's like, don't do it the fuck apart

say just Don't do it the fuck apart. I Got it. I just don't do it in the fucking park. All right, and they're like, all right I think they say okay like fucking 40 times and then he tells them there's other places and they get it and then he just goes off on just bizarre Tangents that have nothing to do with the park But it just it made me think about like there's something that happens to adults. We all experienced it as a kid We're like the adult has to like assert their authority like basically like a police officer

Like it's like I can do this to you because I'm older than you like these kids are just having fun and they're really not Like destroying anything but he's like it's like a preemptive like a preventative like make sure you don't have too much fucking fun In the park when he gets phone calls all the time. He says that he's getting a phone call Like is this number on a fucking billboard? Did they have it on his back of his jacket? He's he makes it sound like that when people Snowboard in the park he gets on calls lives are lost, you know, like It's the most insane rant like it's a real fun here. Here's what okay, let's see make sure tell me if you can hear us now If we need to turn it up, okay

They're over there making major rants and destroying landscaping don't do in the park Number one Number one. I think I'd be like I think this guy doesn't want me to do this in the park Do it in some other area, but don't do the park have plenty of bare hills over here, but don't do it Okay, this is just fucks up the landscaping got your shovels you got all this shit I have to come over here and tear up all this shit spend eight nine hours doing this He's the landscaper, I guess I almost feel like he's volunteering to do it He's just bothered that he has to do it when he wants to

No one sent him over there. He just was like there's people having fun. I gotta stop this That was like what I got from it. Is he like one of those down at the stage you guys have like super heroes Like don't you feel the dreads of superheroes and just go and solve crime everywhere. Wow. It's like the shitty superheroes Those are homeless people There's like I'm saving the day They're not real I like orange juice

Okay All over your stick what the fuck is he talking about? How is that a shtick to go snowboarding is that even appropriate English, but maybe they're funny when they do it Like a ring thong or something Fucking Abbott and Castella Who's snowboarding on first knock off your stick all right You can tell by the way the cameras on him you don't see the kids you can hear the fear in their voice Like when he's like fucks up my shit

That's a scared, okay, you already get the sense that they're boys and I'm guessing they're like Third like 12 to 15 like that's the age. They're 12 to 15. I think so. Yeah I thought he was talking to like people like you and me really Oh That's why I feel like the only reason he has the balls to talk to them like that is because he could take him in a fist fight And he's the yeah, they're the kids like you want to feel like a winner pick on a four-year-old. Yes, exactly Yeah, or like your baby

I could take her 22 days, dude, you're so in charge That's an absolute fucking no go that pisses me off. Okay, dad This is me off Like police shit break up the boards I Said things on fire. That's how it pisses me off. Okay. I want you to say anything on fire, so no And by the way, that's the best way thing just to me right now

Yeah, it's the best way to deal with a heckler when you do stand-up Oh, yeah, like there's the there's the full range of emotions that you can have when like you're trying to do a performance And someone says crazy shit to you like I'm gonna set you on fire or whatever and like The funniest way is always to stay calm, you know, like it's always like I don't want you to send me on fire No, no, you're in threatening on stage like if somebody ever said to you like I'm gonna fuck the shit out of you as soon as you walk off That sounds good Yeah, yeah, yeah while you're on stage while it was on stage. Yeah, yeah, yeah I've had you know, I had a guy who I said one time

I was in the I was doing a show and a lady was in the front row with another lady I'm not you but you're also a lady in the front row and she had another lady with her and then two men and It was like it was like two minutes into the show And I was like could you shut the fuck up because she was talking super loud and her immediate response was we're talking about our kids And I was like nobody here gives a fuck about your kids And she was like what and then her husband was like excuse me And I was like what is do you not understand what I just said like

No one cares about your stupid fucking kid. I shouldn't I took it to your kids are stupid, but like We're gonna say something on fire right now So I was like just go out there like go talk in the lobby about your dumb fucking kid and you know, it went downhill I Don't think I've ever been friend. I had I was in Fairview, Alberta, which is like bumble fuck no where like Norris Yeah, just far and I had to north far When you run out of gas, it's another 20 minutes and I just remember I just started doing stand-up and I there's just a group of rape pigs

Just sitting there just hammer and they just one of them started heckling me But there's like six of them at the table and one started I don't I keep looking at you like we keep pointing at the poor girl But yeah, and then but before you were done like his friends started and then like before you were done You started and then except six people shouting at me and I literally I didn't know what to do And I just sat there No, no, really like great. I know. Yeah, I was just trying to be polite So can I you just don't kill me fight? No, no continue if you're gonna keep okay, okay. Yeah

Can we just leave now? There's there's no it's totally terrifying. I mean I've had somebody throw like a cork. I don't know how they got it I've had a lady, I don't know if I've told this story before but I had a lady in Atlantic City Which is a real fucking beautiful city You've never been to the States set your sights on Atlantic City I want you to go And I was doing I did a joke whatever about a midget and It was a while ago and what it went well, it's not like it went poorly

and Then I went to the bar After the show and this lady was just like motherfucker fucking piece of shit and She's like three stools away, and there's no one in between us So I'm just sitting there like I order a drink and then so she's like off I swear to fucking God. He's the biggest asshole. I've ever fucking met my I'm like the fuck she talking about and The bartender goes

Like Shit and then then she goes you know if Joey was here he would kick his fucking ass And I was like is Joey here now. I was like who's Joey And she goes my son and she still didn't know that it was me like when I was talking to her I Got like were you dressed enough back then in the costume? Yeah, you know, I got my way I was like who's showing she's like my son, and I was like whose ass is he gonna kick She's a fucking piece of shit that was just up there

Me she's like oh shit, and then they're like Security It's right, and then I find out that's that Joey is her midget son. It's her You know, I'm not a fucking badass, but I'm taking all warps on I'm not gonna like threaten that on most people, but if you're fucking three seven I'm gonna whoop your ass There's a great story They go it doesn't matter who who the ecomics were

There's a great story with a comic just eight in a dick on staging Calgary And it's a big biker rally and the ecomics going down really hard And the headliner to the show looks over to the to one of the security guards and says and there is their hecklin And we start to throw their hats at him and stuff and And Holy fuck are you know like are you gonna do something about this and the dorms like oh fuck Yeah, good good call, and he was running up on stage grabs a comic and pulls them off. I Can't believe I know so many so many like

like horrific Heckler stories the one actually the story that stands out the most to me that heckles didn't even happen It was like the environment. Do you guys know do you know Daryl, right? No, Daryl, right? You know him? He's been on the crab piece a bunch, right fuck the crab piece My fucking For people are like what? It's another podcast, but Daryl is a black comic and he got booked to do this gig in Texas and

He showed up and they were kkk chapter And they were like who fuck are you he's like I'm the comic you know Like we put Daryl right. He's like yeah, I'm Daryl right Shit we must reached out to the wrong girl, right? And he did the show And he killed they're like you're all right Alright here's more of this this is not even getting fired up yet listen to this fucking lunatic more

Radical trust me boys fucking radical in the 70s Through the D with a radical he's saying I'm a radical. I'm a fucking radical from the 70s. I don't know They're all I'm sure just like what? Our fucking core Okay, all right gasoline, you know for sugar in the gasoline tanks set the fucking house on fire Pump your girlfriend that kind of radical That's all It sounds like he's a bad ass out of porkies

It's like he is from an 80s movie He's like the ski bum hiding out in the shallow This this is all an extension of don't do this in the park He's just holding on to all these things all the time It sounds like like he's waiting for the light He's just got a fill time like you've got to give these guys Really bad, okay, don't do it the park don't fuck up the landscaping all right Don't do it here

Every time it snows my dick takes a beating I really fucking hard I thought he was crying for a second, but he's laughing when he said every time it snows my dick takes a beating He just seriously masturbates Don't do the park find some other area all right Lots of bare hills over here. I drive a seam every day. Okay, so it's good to the park Well, it's cool. We bus on YouTube, you know bang a fat girl put that on YouTube I

Put that on YouTube Sir, there's a fucking standards for the community on YouTube No, but on x2 That shit, I don't give care about some fucking you know 20 something's on a rail on an agile snowboard Okay, and I fucking snowboard that's two fucking years old Anything that comes along These kids are fucking bad You know when like when like an adult tries to relate but it's like it's so fucking nerded out when they're like

What are you gonna do me too, bro? I fucking snowboard and they're like, what are you right? Whatever comes along Sure It's such bullshit. I hate that's that was the worst is like they're trying to relate You know like when you're and you'll get that and like it's not they don't have to worry about it for like I feel like the first 12 years It's once they hit like teenage and they're like actually really have what they're into and you're like me too You mean like me trying to relate to my kid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like what I'm gonna try. Yeah. Yeah

When you try is when the kids like I already know I'm gonna be that guy I'm gonna be that 70 year old guy like get off my fucking lawn. That's the guy. I'm gonna be that's you right here then You know But I'll just be like that Get off the fucking lawn And then I'll wrap it up This is you right here hard fucking core Hard fucking core man, I don't I don't know if it's hardcore. It's just like fucking tired like I'm 40

I look at bicyclists if they don't signal. I'm like, I will fucking kill you like that's me I'm Did you by the way, I've been coming here once a year No, I was coming twice here for a while and then I walked down. What is this Nelson? towards Granville and like there's like They're dual both ways and like green. I'm like, is this new shit like Why are

But like is that new Millions and millions of dollars millions of dollars. Yeah, yeah, why are they going in both directions? Like they're one way in both directions. No, I fucking know that I Can't believe I missed that one Yeah, let's hear this fucking sociopath. He says more shit. All right The burden board basic bullshit, you know, what's that? Sean white. Yeah, you know, it's just Sean whites here

But he's a helicopter in here bang your mom and your girlfriend and then This guy's a fucking arsonist for sure See the progress bar for this audio clip because we're not even halfway He says way crazier shit coming up. We're just building up Sean white would fuck your mother and your girlfriend and set your board on fire Helicopters in while this guy beats his dick hard because it's no They watch our what would piss around in a city park and do it I just don't fuck off my rails to the neighbors with a game shit. Okay. I deal with them for weeks

Okay, we'll get out here and I'll find out where you live because I love doing that too So not a level you take it to with kids Like if you fucking if you do fuck up my part, I'm gonna find out where you live I don't know if you heard this is what the kid said when he said that If you're a kid and it's like if you were looking at me You're like, I'll find out where you live when I was like 12. I've been shit my pants I

Was walking my dog we have a we have a little black lab and she's three years old She's fantastic, but she she gets into shit sometimes and she doesn't snap out of her right away And so I grab her with a scruff and I just kind of pull her out and she was digging in somebody's garden like in a condo's garden Yeah, we're walking by. She's digging them. Hey, okay. So I just pick her up pop her down Yeah, and this guy in a window shuts down. He was hey leave the dog alone. Like it's a dog it digs And I could have just said hey, like we're okay, but when I get to it I can't hear you. Why don't you come down here? We'll talk about it Oh, Jesus and then he started showing back at me like I'm a horrible person

I'm a bad dog owner and he said what do you have to say about that? And I said I think I know where you live I Shot me out of his fucking window. That's not a smart idea. No, you look like this And then but I think I know where you live and then the window just kind of I remember this it was last time I was here Like I was walking the dog and then he was like, that's what dogs do No, that was a really good tactic you should use that on people guys And then even say it when you have no idea like you go to hit on a girl

Hey, would you like to have a drink and she's like, no, I fucking know where you live No fucking life I live in Reno. This is a shithole. Okay. What do you think I have to do follow you guys around? What's that? Well, that's a bigger shithole too bad for you. It sucks for you All right, let's live in Maui San Francisco Santa Fe. Trust me. Nice places. I fucked up. I lost a home got divorced I still fucking do that It's been building in the student for a long time man To have the camera rolling is the amazing part like

They caught him in like his moment, you know, I mean he's just like letting it all out The cool thing too about this guy like we all have those moments like we look back on our life and go like when did shit turn Yeah, when did something when did I snap where did I go wrong? Where did I go wrong? Yeah He's got it on tape. Yeah, he's got it on tape documented evidence. Yeah Don't do that shit either. Don't get divorced you And he lived in the wrong places. He moved around a lot. He fucked up a lot. I think Yeah

Don't ride a board down here. All right, don't do it. I'm just The neighbors don't hate shit but they call the council then it just trips to one big shit store. Okay, you know, but don't do it here There's after five, you know If Sean White had a tight little vagina, I'd bang him too Wine You literally think it's over like yeah, I literally think it's over. I don't because I see the progress part I don't think it's over and you're like and then you're like that's I guess that's the cherry on top He fucked Sean White if it was he had a vagina. All right

Nope, let's keep talking And they definitely get the point, you know, I mean like they're like we got it You're gonna fuck Sean White and set him on fire and like don't do it in the park And he's like I need to keep talking to you I'm a whore monger, trust me I'm an angry fucking 50 year old guy, trust me He said I

I if you fuck up my tree, I think I'd rather be banging my baby finger banging my baby sister Then if you then have you fucked up my tree He really likes trees guys, I mean I don't know if you understand How much these trees mean to him Yeah That one I think that's when the kid goes I wish I was that kid so badly

It sounds like they're walking away from it. They are they are leaving the park and he is walking with them And he's like a fuck you girls Rather finger bang my baby sister than to fucking my trees though. Okay Oh All right, that doesn't sound so good, I'm sorry You know Just trying to identify with them just hey man, it's gnarly being cool. I ride Spark up a bone get this

You like chicks like fucking chicks. I fuck chicks off fucking fucking in their pussies Sexually He said if you want to break a man do it sexually that's the best way to do it He just told them rape other men Even ones without vaginas like men just do it to the guys That's what I want for winter Right back to don't do it in the park Break a man sexually as if you'll break his spirit. You'll own that bitch. Don't fuck up my part guys

I don't think we have anybody like this in Canada I believe you He's uh, he's neat. Yeah Yeah Do it. I mean plenty kill sites are on here You have a really crazy type of problem is a bum fight and then watch the uh, you know Because they will build you a half fight for like the two tall boys Yeah, I know I know what track it is, but this is something that every time it stalls right here

That's what we're doing What happens is they build these ramps these jumps it was just a matter of just Getting on your board and doing it fine. Don't build the ramps and jumps and don't do this I mean Don't you hate when people over explain shit like Like don't you think when they over explain no and you've already consented no You know, I mean when they're just like, hey, you can't do that and you're like, okay

And they're like, yeah, I mean you just can't do it All right, you know like the thing is, you know, I just can't do it here and you're like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Like it's just it's an ongoing and that's like the the weird parental thing. I feel like there's some parents Who just never quit never quit I I remember parents that didn't quit and I remember I almost feel like they liked ending fun like Whenever we were having fun somebody there was always that one friend's parent here like if that parent shows up We're all going to our own house tonight Like they're the they're the fucking over, you know, I mean like they they discipline too hard

I remember having fun with friends and we were all talking and I was like Going on, you know, when you're your comic you always you can remember Like moments where you were being funny when you were younger. You're like, oh, yeah, and then I developed emotional problems and I'm chasing that validation And just by my existence. Yeah. Yeah Like this is just all fucking stupid. Why am I doing this? But this like this one friend's mom like heard me say ass

Like I was like, yeah, and I was like making friends laugh and then I was like, yeah, and then put it up my ass and she was like And I was like, I'm sorry and then she cried And I turned to my friend and I was like, what happened? He's like, you can't curse in front of my mom And I was like she cries And like made me feel so bad so guilty, you know that I've I've never cursed since Then I was thinking of this and then I found another like a

No fun mom who went to a park and literally almost said the same thing Any profanity? No, you laugh, you laugh. Any profanity comes out of any of y'all's mouths There is a rule that says no profanity. There's a city policeman sitting right over there And I will take any one of y'all to him and you know, we'll go to juvenile court Take record, put it on YouTube, put it wherever you like I am She is a profanity She wanted to arrest a kid

for cursing To others a policeman row over air But I like I grew up in a household where I wasn't allowed to say jesus Oh, really? Yeah, like if I said jesus that was too close to jesus really? Yeah, like my mom was really no Fucked up. It was just so catholic made me. I don't know what they called it But you know, it was she was really really strict and I wrote this as a horrible story I thought I shouldn't tell my brother and I are wrestling And I don't know how well I'm I'm like 12 my brother's 11 and we're wrestling in the living room

And I have my brother on the ground and I'm on top of him and then uh, we kind of stop And I said hey, what's for dinner and my brother said stew I don't know what came over me. I'm like 12 years old. I said stew my boys what comes from a woman's cunt And my mom's And like my brother's eyes will like if he's just And I knew like fuck my mom's right there And he's like, yeah, and she just pulled me off and fucking smoked me across the head. It was awesome But like jesus was a bad word

My boys will come from home of cunt. I think I just heard that word I think I was 12 when I just heard cunt and I wanted to show off So I'm like hey dad watch this. I'm gonna you know, I'm that 40 year old guy As a 12 year old watch me show off. Yeah That's what I was And uh, it was not good. Holy shit. I was I was so the opposite It's so funny to think about when I was in fourth grade I went across the street to the neighbor's house. It was fifth grade and we hung out every day after school

I wouldn't curse And then I did curse but I wouldn't say fuck and he put a knife to my throat And his brother held me and they put a knife and they go say fuck and I was like, no He was a bad word I'm not saying that I didn't say it. Yeah, I would not say it. I was like no because I knew I felt like I think I thought that jesus would come from heaven and take me away if I said Oh, I was sure jesus was watching me jerk off for at least eight years of my life. Yeah, but that's fucking hot It made me question a few things. I'm not gonna argue that

Hey, JC. What's up, buddy? I was thinking that was jesus' job that was just to sit there and be like Fucking gary That guy beats his dick hard Uh, I feel like jesus would laugh at you Well, that's a very small dick, but yeah, that would that would be the problem You're like, hey jesus That was a horrific laugh

Would jesus yell at you? I don't know. Maybe jesus would just What's wrong with you? What's wrong with y'all? You make us a crazy Oh, we can't say that and uh, I don't think you would call me that He would if the two of us were together doing it I met uh, I'm in a community Floyd j. Phillips Floyd he's anyway, I haven't seen him in years

And he's and he's a buddy of a buddy and he's like, hey man, you gotta go meet my buddy Floyd This is an emincent. I walked to meet him and I went to shake his hand black guy from Florida And uh, something got fucked up in the introduction like it wasn't just like, hey man, my name's Toby. I'm a buddy of And he kind of turned and then he turned back to me and all that came out was a uh, toby And he just he stared at me really seriously And I'm like, what? He goes, are you trying to be funny? The fuck are you talking about? Is that your name?

Oh, yeah, my name's toby like holy fuck like he thought I was calling him toby Oh, like he's just in fucking redneck alberta northern alberta And then I'm like, how many five people have I met that I introduced myself as toby and they're like fucking right whatever I the name uh, I know a white guy named Jerome No, like Drones like a unisex name drone. Really? Not like boys girls with the black white I know I know one though. I know one white guy named Jerome. Do you know multiple white guys?

I know I made that name Jerome. It's not a big name up here. Gordy White guys black guys, Mexican guys up here doesn't matter. Gordy So does it strike you as a black name? Like super black Like with a cape like really fucking black No, all right Tyrone to me Yeah

That's really black If you if you named your daughter tyrone, that'd be fucking hilarious Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You know, but that would be a fun, like a good icebreaker You better name Tyrone Tyrone to what? Tyrone All right, don't judge me don't

Judge him The word aunt is pronounced aunt not aunt or auntie or auntie The word is aunt say it with me aunt It's a black eye too Yeah, it's it's aunt I feel like he's out of line Why are you correcting people that say aunt Like isn't he overstepping the fucking boundaries? I can is that like like like the people that like it's basil not basil

Don't you want to kick those people right in the cunt? Yes With until stew flows out Yeah, okay, so this lady We're all over the place, um She says more to these kids because they're like, what is your problem? He was cussing like a sailor and I asked him not to So I Called the city police and they said I can take him or any of you that can't respect it

If you would mouth off in front of a child Okay Fuck are you talking about I don't I have no idea what you're talking about. It's it's just depressing to me Um that the lady wants to just ruin kids Fucking fun like that I You guys don't know Mexican's art

It is time to fill her up and That's right. We're talking about cums really Why not? This is our, uh, British Columbia edition. That's where we are, right? Yep. Okay. Um, look some of these people Weren't born here, but they resided here for a long time. That's what wikipedia said All right, so we'll start with the dudes Let's be up. Would you do would you rather fill up and seal shut? Michael J fox

shaky jeans Or Joshua Jackson from Dawson's Creek Michael J fox easy. None. So wow Can you give me can you take me through your thinking a little bit? Honestly, he he fucking shakes. He'd be like a vibrator Now Let me give you a little bit of insight. Yeah, my friends ex-girlfriend Cheated on him with Joshua Jackson and she said it was fantastic

Just putting it out there He had the worst this is the worst way She was in like some remote fucking city and then she didn't answer the phone all night Like she was out of town. He was like the next day like what the fuck like why didn't you answer the phone last night? She was like I was hanging out with Joshua Jackson from Dawson's Creek And he was like, okay Did you fuck him? And she was like, yeah And then his immediate next question was do you have a big dick?

And she goes, yeah bigger than yours I don't know who Joshua Jackson is like I can't picture in my mind But like Michael J. Fox sounds like a guy that you fuck Joshua Jackson sounds like a guy that fucked you So wait, what are you doing to shakey jeans? Are you fucking him? All right. I'm sorry. Yeah. No, I'm a picture not a catcher My answer is also Michael J. Fox But it's because he's legendary. It's for the story, you know, it's like when we're sitting around telling our stories

20 30 years from now. I'm like, yeah fucking family ties. I fucked him He's a legend, you know I mean, it's just like being like, yeah, I fucked Cosby. It's a fucking big story. You know It's my trump card and we're talking about who we fuck. That's why I think it'd be great. The vibration would also be a big Huge huge But nobody would ever believe you like no, I'm not really I fucked Cosby Oh I think that like with Michael J. Fox if you're like I fucked Michael J. Fox people will be like you hurt him like

They know you're stronger than him. So they're like, you mean you tied him down, but I don't think it's a good story. I don't think I fucked Michael J. Fox and then like like call you Wait, why not? I might call you If you're like, don't tell anybody but I just fucked Michael J. Fox I think you're the only person I know that would go that's so cool I really appreciate that man It's very true

I would definitely I would send you like a handwritten card like I'm so proud of you For fucking Michael J. Fox All right, uh audience Who here would take Michael J. Fox? Yeah, pretty good. I like that. That was like, um, that was like that professor just gave a good point. You went He's gonna be a professor He's doing his phd in what? in history of

Fucking tea at television stars or no What is your phd gonna be in royal navy? royal navy That is a subject Oh, you'll be a like a doctor of naval history I understand that I think you're gonna ship going again. I didn't know I was that fucking dumb Um

Not a medical doctor stupid Is that world naval or is it specific is it just like canadian naval? Okay, so that'll be your expertise the empire and then will you teach classes just on that? What what what do you do with that? Write a book You enjoy it. All right. That's what we do stand up. I'm not fucking accusing you of something You don't have to defend it. I just meant like, you know, just like what's the end end line Probably teaching

You seem fired up about it Where's where does the empire's navy start like what year are we talking about? Sort of I mean, you know nail it, but 17th century 17th century, huh? Was it like a canoe? Is it one ship? What's the difference between a ship and a boat? Size So a ship's bigger than a boat

Um, I knew that Is there a cutoff like there's an actual that that's a ship now Really But there's no like this is like whatever like 50 meters there for it's a ship Not like that. Okay. What if it's like 200 tons? No, it could be a boat. It could be a boat. Yeah. Oh, it's purpose What's a canoe? That's a canoe This was a fun, uh, educational break

More, you know, he has the mbc star. Yes, I wish I had the more, you know, sound bite. I don't have it I'm sorry. I just I don't have it The best I could do All right. Oh, here's educational. This is educated. I haven't played this in forever. Who am I bitch nigga? By your damn friends. Now, you know that guy ain't shit. So I have motherfucking got nothing on me, right? Nothing the white folks and then they're ignorant motherfuckers like you president

That's a bummer. Where the fuck did you get that? Uh, he emailed me. He was like check this out I want to be on the show That's him before he became president. He wrote a book and he did the audiobook You're kidding me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah So he was a senator and he this is the chapter where he's talking about like Growing up and how the guys in the hood were like, you know, I'm like my bitch nigga So great our prime minister would never say something like that. Well, that'd be so different Your prime minister

Well, yeah, your prime minister should be like, you know, white niggard Yeah, maybe he didn't say it. I don't know who said that. I think it was your prime minister That yeah, I didn't I just pushed the button Um, so we got to do the female wait, who took josh with Jackson for the filler of sealer shots Do we ask who would who would take him? You guys didn't answer for either by the way, and I don't think you did either And you have to answer I know where you fucking live

I'll find out I'll bring my dog Shakey jeans or dozens crepe What do you take You got to pick one You don't have to do it Okay, how would you do it like where's it gonna go? Do you know that part like it is to do right? So you're gonna take it

What about you you have a preference they're men come on Michael J. Fox, what's the reason? He's older. That's why you take him I'm pretty sure I'm older. Donald Sterling is pretty old. Would you like a piece of that? No, all right I do love how in the states, uh Like a week ago a formative action is like no like it's gone and Fox news is like no racism's over no more problems and then boom

Sterling boom Dude you take Shakey jeans you Dawson's Creek. Why what's your reasoning? I watched the show you watched the show. Did you ever think about it back then? You can tell he's not gonna get mad at you now. It's over. It's syndication. Just tell us what that is Never you never thought I'm here and the creek is flowing All right Um, all right for ladies bc here we go two fucking heavy hitters

I mean you really got to put some thought in it. So we don't get to answer these ones. Can you do? I'm giving you like real fucking stars here. I'd say before the lady. Okay. I am anderson I mean whoever's number two there you go. I already made my decision. Wow Wow Uh, what are you fucking shitting on tim hortons, too? Carrie en masse From the matrix dark hair. Oh See I knew I made the right you guys not know who your people are

I looked this up on we compete. It took me eight seconds Yeah, he carry en masse easy. I was like a girl who looks like she could be a lesbian, you know Somebody that might put up a fight that I think she's sexy as shit. I think she's fantastic And the other one she's just oh She's been through a ranger. I feel like Carrie en masse but you could take her I mean, you know for this you could take her in a prime You could take her before she was just just had so many Loads based on her and she just

Her whole career like grew on dicks and went down on dicks There were dicks in every trajectory of her career. So you can't like there is no like Yeah, I mean, you can you know, whatever That's where I saw her when I was down there Is he coming he'll come I think that Carrie en masse I choose her Because I like the character in the matrix movies She seems like she takes no shit. Yeah, I mean like I feel like she's like she's putting my nuts in a vice

And she's strapped me down and she's just like I'm you fucking little bitch and I'm like Inside I'm like, yeah You know, I mean, yeah, absolutely. I feel like she's like I'm more come now more more more I'm like, I can't muster up anymore. She's like that. I'll fucking kill you. I'm like, all right one more load like that You know what I mean though that like I do I do Sarah we were having a thing that my brother was in town for the baby And uh, we're all and my brother and I were talking and Sarah looks at me and says, hey guys, can you keep it down? And I looked at her when that was kind of bitchy. Yeah

Kind of hot. Yeah. Yeah. Like I like I like that. Like don't get carried away with it. But I like it, right Like don't fucking skip dinners and shit. Yeah Don't just fucking stay out all night It is I like I like aggressive. I like attitude. No, I'm not fucking over the top Carrie en masse. I feel like she's like What's up, bitch? I'm like, all right Do I need to put a protection on her?

Pretty fucking pussy. I'm like I'm the only one. Okay, whatever. Let's pull This room who takes Pamela Anderson? You could take her inner prime Wow Super hot and baywatch. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Blown out Not even with your dick. No, man I mean, I look I'm not I think she's fucking hot, but I just the other girl that carry in who takes carry on moss

I feel like you guys you guys she popped the carry on moss. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's gonna hot too. Yeah Let's say you go home You're watching Dawson's creek Carrie en masse shows up Wearing all black fucking whatever that is and she gives you a blue pill You're getting down, right? You guys again didn't fucking participate and we're not moving on. Which are you taking? Pam Anderson. Yes you also pay Anderson because she's older I'm wondering if it's the same reason. I have no idea. Is it the same reason?

More experience. So you also think she's more So, how old are you? Oh, don't fucking do that. Okay. How old are you dude? 28 28 or he and how old is she? He's 27. See, I'm smart. I went around you. I'm smart. I know what's to use So technically he's older but I mean Do you have an older brother, man? No. Oh good Bass loves frogs I'm smart. I know what to use

Sorry That was steve He was saying catfish and bass loves frogs I'm smart. I know what's to use Catfish bass loves frogs I'm smart. I know what to use I don't think that could cut off right before he fell over. Yeah, he's the only dad I've ever known All right, we got one last thing here. Here we go. Where is this? Oh, here we go

All right Would you rather time are you ready to do this? All right. Yep. I'll give you two very realistic very grounded scenarios And then you just say, you know, like I'll be like, hey, would you rather have Pasta or beef for dinner? And then you just tell me, okay, you got it. That's exactly how these will be. All right Um pasta, I just find really filling. Yeah. Yeah, and see and then you explain what that's exactly how you do it Okay, would you rather every time you eat a meal with another person Upon completion of the meal, you must lie down on the floor and that person shits on your chest

That's what I'm saying. Yes Yes, you're like, that's a good scenario right there All right, or Every time you use the bathroom When you're done, you must drop to your knees And a member of your family masturbates to completion of your fate No This was set in from

Guys, can you grow up? Do I get to choose a member of my family? Yes, yes, you do. Um that is set in from Matt. Thank you Matt for your thoughtful email Uh Don't be afraid to call somebody Matt. Now This is why this is a good would you rather It's a good would you rather because they're both for most people excluding the yes over there Highly undesirable You got to choose one though. Where do you go? What do you go with?

The first whoever you ate with whoever you had dinner with or had breakfast or lunch with Every time Yeah, that's a great idea. Fuck that shit on the chest. I'm just gonna eat alone every time Yeah, my wife will sit over at that table. I'll sit at this table. She's gonna run over and shit on your chest That's scary. It is an easy decision though. Like it's total shit on the chest. Yeah Yeah, total shit on the chest because at least then I have like I can control who's shitting on me like I can be like Yeah, I love Tom. I do. I still don't know shitting on my chest. So we're not gonna eat together I mean, there's just you know, there's family meals

And Whoa, whoa, whoa, but if I'm like in a group of 10 people do all the shit on my chest. Yeah, all 10. Yeah They line up they take their turns That is dirty and disgusting I love how she felt they need to say that out loud that it was disgusting just in case people in the room weren't sure like Dirty and disgusting I think that yes, that's exactly. Oh my god, you guys are so disgusting I think it's an easy one to actually know that I think about it. It's got to be shitting on your chest because

the otherwise You're when you every time you go to the bathroom, which is I mean come on how many times you go pee in a day Oh, dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you know, so like it could be like what five six times a day Your cousin or your dad's jerking off on your face like You can live on a one big meal a day if you like dad come on He's like you've read that email You make your choice This you said it. I I'm just following what matt said

Oh my god, you guys are so disgusting Um, who here would would take the shitting on the chest in that scenario? Yeah This show we do important work on the show. I used to always have the point that who here would take the come on the face I honor you whoever said that over clap the one cloud It's disgusting to have all that shit on you After every meal you could just have grandma's squirt, you know

No, I just I thought we were past that Okay, um, so this one I actually have uh, this is a great scenario that somebody Pitched to us, I guess For those of you who want to pitch it home Send your pitch to send your pitch to me. All right. So this person wrote would you rather? Wow, this is crazy Would you rather clean? King ass ribbers

Butthole spotless With only kisses Um, do you know king ass ribbers? I have no idea who king ass ribbers is But but you know what in the context I can kind of get it It is not nice That's very well said He doesn't do nice things He makes fart videos

Yeah, and they're really aggressive. He farts really strongly My fart is some stockings Stockings, you know that they hang on the on the mantle That's one That's one Two So Picture what he just did you're kissing his bubble. Okay

Clean this would entail this is from a listener. This would entail a reloading technique By licking your lips after each kiss He says you can't clean with the dirty surface Duh I love that they're one they're feeling or coming and two Like he literally has thought this through like oh, yeah. No. No. No. No. You're gonna have to reload is Clean. Yeah, he really has this he has this beat out for you. Um, so that's one scenario Or would you rather film a two hour long nipple sucking fest

With the german from are you thirsty? Okay So this new video will become a huge viral sensation and you will be recognized wherever you go For how well well you suck those monster fry So i'm not filming it. I'm not the guy holding the camera. You're sucking his nipples. Yeah, he has big meaty beefy nipples And he's german and he groans Whoever is making that noise that was fantastic So would you rather be a part of a german?

Homo erotic nipple sucking two hour draining nipples Video and everyone's like you're the guy from the fucking nipples thing or i could thought these would be more challenging Like i nipples fucking done like done that like because then you know what even then i'd have plausible deniability I can just close my eyes and pretend it's Sucked my wife Yeah, i don't know i haven't seen his nipples so i have no idea how to compare she's pretty skinny right now So fuck her a little big But you know i think i think she's up for a fucking uh challenge

um These are really really incredible nipples. Do you want to see him? Oh, yeah, can i see him? Yeah, yeah, yeah one second Sorry, i can't show this to you guys, but i think this might sway him a little bit Okay, you're i just can't imagine somebody's nipples. They're gonna sway me to an asshole I'm gonna kiss i would rather kiss for somebody's shits until it's clean then then uh Like but i'm assuming at this point there's a gun to my head right like there's a gun Like because you you had a knife to your neck and didn't say fuck so i could just say fuck you i'm not doing either one of these You could

Well, then i choose that Oh There was just one i mean we're trying to we're trying to have fucking fun here, man If you don't want to fucking play our game, you shouldn't do it in park Okay, here we go I love you had to sign into your your channel counting. They don't let you not sign in to see this video Come on. Oh, that's hilarious. Why have i'm this connection in the basement isn't good All right, that's right. Yeah, okay. Are you sure i'll i'll check it out?

Do you guys feel the same way yeah, yeah You're not i mean he's the king king Yeah, i mean it's like hello fucking you know british history Henry something you kiss it right it's a king The ring All right, well, i'm with you. I gotta admit i'm i'm with uh Sucking those big German temples. Yeah, i mean he got it really. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Here we go last one. You know i'm saying Would you wrap

Your spouse injects You know i'm saying in the middle of every sentence And punctuates every sentence with you know i'm saying Or you go on a road trip with the kardashians kanye and miley cyrus for a whole year All expenses are paid You still need to buy food and small things Here is the last sentence you can travel anywhere, but you need to keep moving But he's just like you can't get comfortable in a city

Okay, you know i'm saying which do you so either My wife says you know what i'm saying Three four times every sentence all day whenever she speaks the baby needs to be fat. I'm saying The dishes you know i'm saying i guess i well how come you left the window you know i'm saying The garage isn't you know i'm saying how would it work? You know i'm saying are you shooting it? And that's for you i'm saying yeah, or one year with the kardashians A fucking year On the road kanye too

Kanye's there you're like right now. I don't know what you're saying I'm gonna introduce myself to the toby Yes, right out of the gate and they're like what reggie what yeah I The number one there we go Well, you know it's weird that you don't you strike me as a fucking hardcore kardashian guy Um Yeah, I think a lot. I mean I knowing you

I don't think you'd be like do you're wrong. It's a purpose of fucking fit. I just get along You know, I would pick the kardashians only because i'm i'm a i like to do the work up front And then enjoy like if i'm eating dinner and i get like a my favorite part like the steak I'll get to i'll eat the steak laughs, but do you really? Yeah. Yeah, just well it depends what else is on the plate But if i gotta get like what if i'm a beans and like like fucking somebody's nipple like oh, yeah I'll eat that first and then Yeah, eat the steak later. Oh, yeah. No, i'm too see i'm pig

I'll be like all the other the good stuff. I'll eat the good stuff I'll always first shovel it then I forget I forget to breathe like it's bad How do you watch like but then you got nothing to wash down the shitty stuff with afterwards Like if you're sitting there eating brussel sprouts with shit on them and you could have had steak at the end But I don't think i'm not saying i'm making a strong argument. No, I know I've never made this argument before So it's the first time i'm saying it in public And they're not buying it either

No, i'm just i just i'm just saying that I shovel Yeah, oh, and you just don't even look I don't look and I forget that like other people are eating at the table So you and take you know what i'm saying? No What the fuck are you saying? I don't know what i'm saying and I don't know what I mean, but I feel like that would make me absolutely lose my fucking mind I feel like I could spin

I could be entertained by how annoyed I am by the kardashians And kanya like it could be enough of a crazy show to what witness in person Where I'd be like this is absolutely fucking bananas Like you know what I mean? Like I would just watch it. I'd be an observer Um and not engage, but if like my fucking wife was 80,000 times a day saying you know what i'm saying? I would just be like no i can't take it I can't who would take you know what i'm saying from their girlfriend boyfriend or spouse Yeah

Who would go on a road trip with kanya in the kardash? That one got easier the longer we talked about I know see that that's why you got to talk these things out you guys Because are you ready realistic scenarios that you have to talk them out? Um, all right. Is there I gotta we got to wrap this up. You guys are fucking phenomenal. Thank you for coming to this tonight Is there any sound I like to ask the live shows now if there's any sound drop you want to hear I Thank you for that That that uh somebody talk to me

Uh Oh It's my dad All right, what'd you say so gentle. Oh, yeah, um top dog. What do you want to hear? All right Here we go Not Okay

That was not he has my dad That was your dad. That was my dad. Was he having like an asthma attack? He had a funny thought and that's why Like that's how he you should see when he when he hears like a street joke. Yeah, it's like he goes I He fucks it all up and you're like You're like, I don't you got to get the setup clear. I don't know how the punchline doesn't make sense He's like you get it. I'm like, no

It's just like it's all over the place You get it I Knocker in the head one day out here beside the garage because she called me unretarded. I was gonna knock her in the head with a clone hammer It's so retarded That's why I didn't bring her She fucking wouldn't give in on that Um, all right, here we go. Where the fuck is this?

Your wife is hot by the way. Thank you Like I had no idea like really you you said it before like I remember you saying like yeah, I got hot wife and then I saw I googled her and like And uh I'm just saying you and I fucking we must be pretty funny or something We're boy, you fuck my wife, too Yeah, yeah, I'll fuck her so hard

This is like a big fan of our show I think we have a sponsor I mean you can go to our website W. W. W. All right, you get it Man, you guys are good. These are some good ones. I haven't played that forever. I know where did that one go? Shit, I lost that word Big oh boy Weird how about this one? There's no such thing as one thing

Retard definitely saying retarded Um, all right. Oh you guys know It's so stupid Wait, I brought jeans unit shirts by the way And I bought uh bike shirts, too What is it somebody just yelled out I was trying to find it Fucking camp where the fuck is that? I can't find it. I got walka-flocka for you Oh

What y'all know about rapping what you know about those lyrics Big words Yeah Okay, okay, okay, okay, Jesus I know that's a weird one to play. Um, it's a guy He's homeless and he's laying in the streets and there's no one there But he's saying this So he's having imaginary sex, but it's really good

Shit Did I tell you that fucking uh, this guy has been direct messaging me Not him. No Why don't you fuck me in my ass, man Uh He was like, you real as fuck he's okay Delighted he he or whatever he has no teeth This guy has no teeth and he

Raps about how good he is as he at eating pussy. Can we have no teeth? Yeah, we played him on I was like, yo, man, your videos are the shit. He was like, thank you. You real as shit, too And then he's like, I saw one of your jokes That's that's my dog now, man We're close. All right, um, I gotta get out of here. Uh Honestly Jelly beans, I think you did it better than she did He's hundreds of these dude, you're telling me and I have I have a bad system

Like I don't know how to find Like a search function or something. Yeah, I should have gotten that No, I don't have it. All right. Um, I gotta get a song on the way out of here city connection. You want city connection? Wow Just give me like 15 minutes while I You see the word city you fucking See it. Nope. Come on. Why don't I bring you here? All right All right, um, you guys were amazing. I had so much fun. Thank you so much

All right, follow him on twitter, um Uh at toby heart rave and you know that like twitter's big because we love social media All right, um, that's it. I'll be hanging out if you want to say hello if you want to Jean's unit sure, uh, whatever just let's hang out. Let's have a drink. All right. Thanks guys. Love you guys. Thank you You Thank you