Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Nair Hair Removal | Your Mom's House Ep. 721

Episode Date: August 16, 2023

SPONSORS:-Go to to get $200 off ANY mattress of your choice.Why do dads love World War II? How is this graphic video still on YouTube? Why is RPC so upset? On this episode o...f Your Mom's House, Tom and Christina tackle these questions and more. Apparently, it's been quite an interesting summer for the Mommies as Tom almost drowned in the ocean and Christina got into a huge confrontation outside of a grocery store. We also get the return of The King, a discussion on aliens, and two brand new Cap Reports! Finally, Nadav gives us an update on his journey to the New York City Marathon. We're all really excited for him!

Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This week on your mom's house. Here's the thing, I can't tell you the only thing that really gets to me about this. I don't like ham sandwiches. In the fifth dimension, the fourth dimension, we just can't perceive it, it's fucking crazy. There are in the oceans, there are in the government. I love here all day. Straight guys also like, you know what, the fucking saddest thing in my life right now? You're like, what is it? I can't come as much as I used to. Welcome, welcome, welcome to your mom's house. This episode of your mom's house is brought to you by my favorite in yours, Sautva.
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Starting point is 00:01:39 choice. Pull your jeans up over your tits and get ready to celebrate. You're gonna be so excited and rip your tits out and shitt all over your dick today. You sure are. It's we're back, we're in 4k and couldn't be more excited to be back here in studio. I love it. The show has gone on as you know we haven't we never miss a week but those shows were pre-recorded. Yep. We took the kids out, did some family stuff, saw some peeps. We were looking for, we're looking for reading the thing he's like. We visited some friends in Los Angeles, did a bunch, we did work there, did meetings, a couple shows, but it was a good, very necessary time to do that.
Starting point is 00:02:28 And now we're back here in beautiful 108 degree office. No, yeah, I also, I had my smurf day. You did? June 18th is my smurf day and I turned 47. You did. And what's really neat is that you were training our children in repeating exactly how old mom is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:46 Well, I'm going to tell the audience what you've been telling them. I would tell them, those tell them, because they know your age. Like it's fun to tell them wrong ages for other people. Like they're 100% convinced that Charles 101 is telling 102. And they're always like, when does grandma turn 102? Oh my god, September 25th. And then my mom facemes and then they're like,
Starting point is 00:03:09 are you excited to turn 102? And she's like, yes. Yeah. And then you're sister Jane tells them that she's 28. Yeah, she's like, I'm 28. Which she's not. And they're like, okay, like they don't know. But she's like, don't tell them I'm not like, what? Yeah. You're not fooling anybody. Well, I mean, she's not and they're like okay like they don't know she's like don't tell them I'm not like what
Starting point is 00:03:32 Yeah, you're not fooling anybody. Well, I mean she's fooling them. That's true. You're probably seven seven year olds and five year old They're just like oh cool. She's 28. I'm like, uh-huh. Yeah, so Yeah, tell them what you trained so I train them to go Well, I was 47 and then she'll be 48 and then 49 and then 50 and I go, wow, wow, wow, wow, right? So now, they go, mom's 47, and I'm like, yeah, and they're like, that's just 48, 49, 50, wow, wow, wow, and I go, yeah, so they're always going, wow, wow, wow, at 50, yeah, and that mom's going to be 51st, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, and what's really neat is that you had the McBirthday cards for me, with, you're going to be 50, yeah. And that mom's gonna be 50 first. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Wow, wow, wow. And what's really neat is that you had the make birthday cards
Starting point is 00:04:07 for me with, you're gonna be 50. Wow, wow, wow. So it's everywhere. Yeah, this is fun. Yeah, that's great. It was super fun. It's depressing to think that I'll be 50 soon. And I hate the fact that you are,
Starting point is 00:04:19 that you aren't even in your really mid 40s. You're only 44. I'm 44. You're sucks. And the crazy thing is, I'll see you go into this deep dark depression when you turn 50 and it'll still be light years away for me. Light years. Like I'll see it and I'll be like, I don't know what that's like.
Starting point is 00:04:35 And then the next year you'll be like, I'm 51 and I'll be like, I'm 48. I don't know. It'll just be like this whole thing where it's like, by the time you're like, I'm out of my depression. I'm turning 50. I'll be like, I thing where it's like by the time you're like I'm out of my depression I'm turning 50. I'll be like I guess I'm about to turn 50 Yeah, and then I have to relive what it's like to turn 50 because you'll see it with me sucks But the good news is statistically speaking men die before the women. So I will outlive you Statistically statistically speaking like but you're saying I will Outlive you I will outlive you. I will outlive you
Starting point is 00:05:12 Statistically would yeah, but I will let me look you you engage in many reckless Behabewers I don't engage in for instance may I share what you said to me this morning sure? We we we went to the beach we visited the beach a few times when we were in LA. Yes. And you would go swim in the First of all bacteria infected water which they came out Pacific ocean. They they the LA county came out saying that the water has bacteria in it Yeah, and you're like, okay, it's not at this beach I'm like as if as if bacteria knows to stop at certain beaches and not flow through the water Oh, that's a good beach. It doesn't go there
Starting point is 00:05:47 And you were like sometimes I would swim and I'd be afraid for my life. I thought I was gonna drown three times, yeah. And yet you still went. And I would go back the next day and I'd have dreams about drowning. Terrifying. Yeah, it's terrifying. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:00 It was, it was, And yet it doesn't deter your actions whatsoever. Well, it did make it, I probably, I remember going, I probably shouldn't swim in here anymore. And then I was like, stop being a bitch. I'm like, I'm in there. Cool. Yeah. I mean, you can also maybe look at the tides and be like, oh, the high tides,
Starting point is 00:06:14 it was aggressive. And there was a crazy undercurrent, you know? It was a riptide. Yeah. And so just like a wave would come down on you. And then the, the current would also be coming back from the previous wave. And I also put together that there weren't a lot of people swimming. I'm like nobody.
Starting point is 00:06:31 Yeah, I was like, I'm the only one swimming here. Yeah. That's cool. And they tell you swim experts always swim alone, especially when you say that. They do say that. They go, if you're gonna go to the ocean or somewhere treacherous to swim, do it alone.
Starting point is 00:06:45 So many times I would see a Coast Guard and Sheriff helicopters fly over ahead and I'd always be like, I think this is, they're probably checking on me. There's that fucking psycho again. And I was swimming by the way, not like go out, do a little swim, come back. I would walk down for like 20 minutes
Starting point is 00:07:06 and then try to swim all the way back, you know? Yeah, you know, it's interesting. I don't know what you're doing. Yeah, try to not be a fucking pussy. I always like that, I always admire that. But you know, we all do behaviors that don't make sense. And, you know? Yeah, man, I was so scary a few times.
Starting point is 00:07:23 You're so scary. A few times. You saw your life flash before you. Yeah. And when morning I was walking out there and I did not see you in the ocean and I did have a moment of panic where I was like, oh he's dead. He's definitely drowned. And then I started to walk to kind of look for your body and then I was like, yeah, but he'll float.
Starting point is 00:07:42 Like if it's his body, he'll float. And then, like, I'm not gonna jump in this water to save him, because it's so cold. And you'll die too. Sure. And then you did see me. Yeah, and then I, And then the coolest thing was I got out and you're like, oh, you know, it's crazy.
Starting point is 00:07:55 Way back there, I thought you were dead. Anyway, you wanna get lunch and I was like, all right. Well, I wouldn't let it ruin my day. You didn't eat lunch. Like if you died, I still go. There's so much good food in LA. I forgot about. I can't miss lunch time. It's my favorite meal.
Starting point is 00:08:16 Yeah, that's true. That's true. All right, well, why don't we do the opener? Sorry. That's so cool. In honor of the glasses you're wearing. Oh, cool. In honor of the glasses you're wearing. Oh cool. Are you a Jewish girl looking for a sweet kind and amazing boyfriend? Oh, Jesus. Who will care about you? Well, I am your man.
Starting point is 00:08:33 My name is Jeremy Hassan. I am 21 years old. I'm Jewish. I'm from Maryland. I'm a baseball loving, kindhearted, amazing guy. We'll always hype you up and be there for you. Would you like to be my first girlfriend and fill out the Google Form Apple Payment in my bio?
Starting point is 00:08:57 So proud of you. You're gonna be a big time. Oh my gosh. It's like, His twin brother. Welcome. Welcome to your mom's house. With Don Segura, Tom Hussup's tour. And Christina Pajitsin,
Starting point is 00:09:16 Christina Shish, Welcome to your mom's house. This is a great song. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wowov, fun to see it. Did you had, did it work? Did you get your girlfriend? No, the right one never applied. The application party. Yeah, that's the best part. I mean, look, he's offering a lot, though. He's like, I will be your height man.
Starting point is 00:10:20 I'll support you. The only thing that is a deterrent for me of being somebody's first girlfriend is the amount that he's going to jizz inside of me will be so monumental. He's never had a girlfriend. It's gonna, by the way, I think you can. I think you can. I think you can.
Starting point is 00:10:36 I think you can, it's gonna take a while to get there. It's not like that. You don't think he's gonna be out the gate. Not a chance. Serious. He's a sweetheart. He's timid. Yeah, of course. He could be dating you for a few months before that happens. Okay, well, I think if I have food, did you pick up the locks? Yeah, he's a sweetheart. I have the goat. Well, here's his application. I got sad today. Let's just see how it starts.
Starting point is 00:11:06 Shabbat with my mom. Start at the top here. Your name. Where are you from? Middavits, go it. By the way, let's get through this first. Yeah. What is your Instagram?
Starting point is 00:11:16 That's good. What is your TikTok? Are you Jewish? Why do you want to be my girlfriend? Are you willing to date me even though I'm a short king? I mean, I love him. This is a very maybe this is just a very modern approach, but I do feel like It's not the right way to go. I mean, I think this guy is a real sweet guy But this is like lists and like applications. It's just not I don't think it's the good. You know Tom
Starting point is 00:11:44 I think you're right, but since you're so much younger than me, you don't really see the wisdom that I have. I think in today's world, in the swipe right, swipe left world, he's really trying to like hone in and narrow down his, I mean, kids don't cork the way we do. I would love to see if this worked out.
Starting point is 00:12:02 It's smart. Because the type of girl that's gonna respond to this. Yeah. No, no, here's the thing, she's got to be in Maryland. Jewish. That's hard already, right? And like kind of into a real sweet guy.
Starting point is 00:12:22 Yeah. Right? Like, this is what makes her lips quiver, you know, and get all moist and slide off a chair. Stop it. Is this? I'm gonna puke. So it's a really specific target. Well, I like good guys. You would never fuck this guy. I don't know. Yeah, you wouldn't. You would be like, you should meet my friends. That's true. I pawn him off on like,
Starting point is 00:12:50 but first of all, you're not a J-Broad, even though you're a- Oh, yeah, I'm not a J-Broad. You're wearing J-Broad. But glasses. I am, but can I say something? He's not upset. The dog isn't upset by these J-Broods.
Starting point is 00:12:59 Yeah. No, I'm upset by the video, not so much your glasses. Yeah. What bothers you? He wants it. Everything about it. He's a nice much your glasses. What bothers you, he wants it. Everything about it. He's a nice kid, the you read that. He seems super nice in the baseball.
Starting point is 00:13:09 I mean, what's not to like? What do you not like? I like him. You shouldn't bag also. I don't like these, like, please be my girlfriend. Just the, you know, just that. This old work, you know, it's a thing. You don't want to approach this as please be my girlfriend, because it just, even if
Starting point is 00:13:29 you're not saying it, it gives off like a sense of desperation. You want to be like, I'm available. I'm taking applications for my girlfriend. That's right. That's how he should reduce the video. That's how you fix this. I'm out. I'm single.
Starting point is 00:13:43 I'm ready to mingle. Let's see who's out there. These are, I'm Jewish, I like baseball. You know, if you go like, I promise I'll be there for you. It's like, it's too desperate. Yeah, it's too desperate. And what happens, everything gets all dried up down there. You know? It's so true.
Starting point is 00:13:59 You want to keep it, you want to keep it. Oh, right, I get it. Stop. Jesus, fuck. Yeah, that's right. No, I get it. But I do like I like him. I think you sweet. You're right. The approach needs to be a little more. Well speaking of I you wish. No, we haven't seen you in a while. And last time we saw you, you were into the idea of getting yourself in better physical shape and attempting to run the New York City marathon. Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:33 What have you done since I've seen you last year? So major. What's going on? So it's been quite a journey. It's been, I want to say, close to a month and some change since like the gauntlet was thrown. I've been working out every single day, I was doing two a days with Sean for like,
Starting point is 00:14:54 I wanna say about three or four weeks. I don't wanna have noticed which was super interesting, is that the more health people you get involved, the more they disagree with each other. Yeah, that's true. It does happen. And that kind of froze me up for like a week. I'm just like, oh, this person's an idiot. Don't fucking, their plan is wrong.
Starting point is 00:15:12 Do you mind listening to me? Yeah. Exactly. So now I'm like listening to one person in particular, the nutritionist that Ryan hooked me up with or directed me to. And what's your eating like? that Ryan hooked me up with or directed me to. What's your eating like? I'm cooking every single meal.
Starting point is 00:15:30 And if I can't eat, then it's like, oh, okay, well, I'm just getting something that's just high in protein and no carbs and stuff like that. What do you mean chicken tits and like... Chicken tits? Yeah, chicken tits. Chicken tits, some fish, shrimp. How has your... Has your physical fitness improved in these weeks?
Starting point is 00:15:50 Yeah, so when I first started, I think I said, oh, I'm close to my heaviest, I'm 260, I was way fatter than that. How much were you? I was like, like, when I got weight, when I got weight on my dog, I was 290. Oh, yeah. Oh, but I didn't even think my body was capable of getting up to that number. I was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Well, first of all, that is, you're on the right path.
Starting point is 00:16:27 You look so much better already. Your face looks less puffy. You're not eating shit late at night. You're not doing the same. I'm learning how. I'm learning inflammation is like a whole thing. Yeah. It's like it prevents you from doing things.
Starting point is 00:16:41 Yeah. It's not just like all you look poofy. It's a lot of things. You realize that means that you, that's so funny, because I've been talking about it. You were in your own head off by 30 pounds for what you thought you were.
Starting point is 00:16:53 Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I went to my doctor the initial time, I was just like, hey, that scale is like, it's wrong. It's like, it's because I have my shoes on, right? Yeah. She's like, oh, you weren't 30 pounds, right? Yeah. Yeah. She's like, are you wearing 30 pounds shoes? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:06 No. Fuck. Okay. And how about are you, so it's obviously a really big thing you're undertaking, but. Yeah. So you started, I'm sure you're going by walks and stuff, right? Are you like, you know?
Starting point is 00:17:17 Right. So like I was talking to Mark Bell and like he was giving me a routine before I started like going heavy training with Sean. And so he was like, oh, okay, well, start with going on like 30 minutes, 60 minute walks, start with that, and then throw in 30 seconds of light jogging in between.
Starting point is 00:17:35 And this is like week one. And so. How was the fear? Because I know you were so afraid of hurting yourself. How was that? The two days, I mean, look, I've already thrown out my back twice in this process, but it's like, you just get a quick bow to the spine
Starting point is 00:17:48 and you're good to go, like with a day or two. Look, look at that. Yeah, it's, well, like I've also seen some things and something really resonated with me. It's, would you rather be in pain doing nothing or be in pain doing something? Man, that's a good one. That's a good one.
Starting point is 00:18:02 That's a good one. And so, and so the first week, Mark, was like, oh, yeah, you should like just do some light jogging, just introduce it immediately, both my calves cramped up. Yeah. And couldn't walk for like two or three days. Yeah. So then it's like, okay, let's first take off a bunch of weight before we introduce like fast walking. So now I'm just doing walks, fast paced walks. How are you doing it for like 60 minutes or how long do you do it for?
Starting point is 00:18:28 Yeah, I'm going for 45 minute walks an hour around my neighborhood, sometimes treadmill, if it's too hot. But I mean, honestly, once you get going in this 100 degree weather, like just get off of you. It all feels the same, right? You're going so fast, the breeze in your face. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Do you walk at a fast pace? What's your face? Yeah, I have to because like right now, I've noticed that my biggest bottleneck is my calves. What'll happen is like, they'll start first burning a little bit and then they'll just start cramping to the point where like my body will just start you hydrating like a motherfucker too?
Starting point is 00:18:59 Yeah. I'm on so many fucking supplements. I'm on so many PEDs. Like it's a PED. Performance enhancing drugs. Fuck yeah, did he? What's up? High teen adob is here.
Starting point is 00:19:09 High teen adob is here. Oh shit. What's your T level super low? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? Oh wow, because this isn't weight gain contribute to low T. Well, yeah, the other thing that's real crazy
Starting point is 00:19:21 that is like scientifically proven is that men who kind of live a sedentary lifestyle in their 30s will more rapidly have a decrease in their testosterone and then who stay physically fit, lift weights, take care of themselves, they don't have that decline. So you can actually fend off that from happening just by being like healthy, take care of yourself. I was definitely in the former category,
Starting point is 00:19:54 by not being active and then you see. You always, you're always a high-tech, I mean. Thanks. You always gave it to me. I mean, I always came a lot, but it wasn't because. You came a lot. But yeah, but that's fun. It's like now it's just like,
Starting point is 00:20:09 if anyone like kind of crosses me now, I just kind of like fucking check them. No, you didn't expect that. That's the team coming in, I love that. The team starting to come in. I'd rage the dove. Can I ask what your dosage is? I think I'm taking 25 units a week right now.
Starting point is 00:20:28 Okay, and then was a week. Okay. And then that'll, I don't know, sorry, I'm taking 25 units twice a week. That's, yeah, that's 25 units twice a week. And then we're adjusting that after a month. And then on the Minjaro too, which is also very interesting to see how that works.
Starting point is 00:20:48 What's that? Minjaro's kinda like, it's like, it's like ozampic, where it's just, you take that and you're like, food you gross, I don't like that. Fuck yeah, dude. So yeah, so it was like, and I just came back from Mexico celebrating with an anniversary and I was Buying so much expensive food that I had like two bites. I'm like, yes
Starting point is 00:21:11 I really need a stuff this like fat and a dog was like bro We fought fat and juned up was like so much money on the table We have to fucking take it And now just like I literally cannot and like I actually lost weight on vacation, which is fucking great. Yes. Well stay focused, man. Stay focused.
Starting point is 00:21:29 So pumped, man. You are getting an enormous Irish tattoo if you don't complete the marathon. Don't forget that. So I did kind of forget. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are we getting to say, oh, Callahan? I think Irish pride with a large Irish flag.
Starting point is 00:21:43 Yeah. I'll get the flag Irish pride is a prison tattoo man Anything with pride at the end of it. Yeah, that means you're looking for fights. Okay, well then a large Irish flag and O'Calaan Yeah, go on my first tattoo. Okay, big one though big old English not like oh look here. No chest a chest piece right back One of the two If you don't finish Wait, if you get to choose if it's on the chest
Starting point is 00:22:10 You know it could be a moderate size if it's on the back. It's the full back I just have an Irish flag on my full I hope your girlfriend is into that look that likes Irish Yeah, dude. I hope your girlfriend is into that look. Yeah, that likes Irish. Yeah. We hold on, but is it if he doesn't finish the marathon or if he doesn't finish it within the time? Yeah, it doesn't finish period. Yeah, it just gives up. So in line of this discussion, I got this email in from a listener. Hi, Jeans. While I was sitting at my desk last Wednesday, my boss became concerned about my mental well-being because I was howling with laughter at the thought of the dog running the New York City marathon.
Starting point is 00:22:49 However, as someone who has run several marathons before and is also signed up for the New York City marathon this November, I could not be more excited about this challenge. You have already set up the most important part of training for a marathon, a support and accountability network. Nothing motivates you more than the desire to achieve your goals and the thought of the merciless heckling impossible failure. There are a few things that you should know about the course ahead of time. The New York City Marathon has some of the best crowds in the world with an estimated 2 million spectators throughout the course. Go Natal! Go Natal!
Starting point is 00:23:29 They're not all gonna be like that. I mean... On first Avenue and Central Park, with all the cheering, you will feel like an Olympic athlete. Oy, vague, go! Oy! We gotta think of our signs and stuff, because we're all going to this. All of the mommies are going to be there. You will not find this festive atmosphere in a few spots.
Starting point is 00:23:48 I specifically remember the Hasidic neighborhoods of Brooklyn being silent. Then again, perhaps they weren't excited to see my ganglias, but could be overjoyed to see Nadav. So that's interesting. He's saying we should set up in the Hasidic neighborhoods in Brooklyn. Well, that's a probably a good idea. Also, Nadav will be at clear to spot because he'll be wearing a star of David's shirt and shorts. And, uh, this is news.
Starting point is 00:24:12 You're representing. Yeah, and I'm like, how people will know. Like, that's our guy. And the Yamaha girls. Very cool. The biggest piece of advice to Nadav is you're going to have to get out on those long training runs. These runs won't be about hitting a specific time, but rather completion and building the Rice to Nadav is you're going to have to get out on those long training runs. These runs won't be about hitting a specific time, but rather completion and building the
Starting point is 00:24:29 mental wear with all to continue when experiencing that kind of pain. You can do this. Good luck coming up in November, Tom. And the big thing I think is that we are where we are right now. There's time. It's about focusing on like you said, dropping weight so that your body can withstand the stuff and just know that that's coming up. But yeah, it's a mental. I think everybody you talked to, I talked to Cam Haynes about this once, about, you know, how the fuck do you run? This guy run, he'll run a marathon during a lunch break.
Starting point is 00:25:01 What? Yeah, Cam Haynes runs, like he'll run 25 miles during lunch, you know, and he does ultra-marathons, he does 50-hundred mile runs, right? Wow. But I don't, you can see that, and he said, the hardest part is mile one. Mm.
Starting point is 00:25:18 Mile one is the hardest part for ultra runners. You know, that's the part where they're like, fuck. Like, it sucks, they think it sucks. And then it's all upstairs. I mean, you obviously have to have your body in a certain level of condition to do this kind of stuff, but it is all up in your head, you know?
Starting point is 00:25:35 Yeah, because I assume it becomes meditative, right? Like, you're, you're, most I ever got into running was when I was 14, and I would run 10 miles, which is less than half of a marathon. And it was, I mean, what I can remember from that era was still telling yourself when you're, when you, when that part of your head goes, all right, I think you're tired, I think slow down or I think this doesn't feel good. Keep going, and you do like get into this groove of it. Go, go, go, you keep going.
Starting point is 00:26:09 And also, I don't marathon runners pissed themselves, because there's a point where you lose body function control. I've heard that towards the end of it, you just piss yourself, and they eat those goo things, those goo power bars. I mean, I don't know if they piss themselves because they're so dehydrated. But.
Starting point is 00:26:28 No, no, I mean, you lose control of your body function because your body starts to kind of shut down, no? Towards the end, I've heard this. I'm not familiar, I know. It's interesting you say that, yeah, I saw a thing that they shit themselves. Shitting is more common, I think. Is that right?
Starting point is 00:26:43 Well, you got to shipple. Shitting and organ failure, I think, is more common? Yeah. Well, you got to ship. Shitting and an organ failure, I think is more common than pissing yourself. I'm cool with organ failure. Yeah. I do not want to share myself in the middle of that. Yeah. That would not be good. Well, maybe if you could run, aren't there running diapers, you know, for sure. Yeah. You know, you're running divers. What, but you got to shit that what time does the race begin? Is it like 6 a.m. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You better start maybe practice running so early.
Starting point is 00:27:06 I mean, I'm already naturally waking up at like seven out to get a workout and before work and stuff. Um, speaking of all this stuff, I got to tell you, I did a deep dive on Hitler the last two. Well, um, this guy, I got to tell you something. He was, he was really something. I have been watching so much Hitler stuff. Well, it's me from me because I fall asleep while you're doing.
Starting point is 00:27:33 You fall asleep to it. And it's, I'm, yeah. And you get to hear all this, each of this. Yeah. And it's shifted from murder to Hitler, which I prefer World War II hands down. Yeah. Because my father, I feel like it's a right of passage
Starting point is 00:27:44 for men where you're not a real dad until A you get dead mouth where your breath smells like shit for no reason. And my son, my youngest is like your breast mouse terror. But I know what's happening. He'll tell me that in the morning. I'm like, good morning. He's like, oh, wash your mouth.
Starting point is 00:27:57 Yeah. And B, all dads love Hitler. I don't know what this is. I would rephrase that. Real dads love Hitler. Real dads love Hitler. I don't know what this is. I would rephrase that. Um. Real dad's love Hitler. Real dad's love history. Is there a way to do it? But my dad never read books. I, but I guarantee the only books he would read are about H.
Starting point is 00:28:15 Yeah. Big H. Big Hit League. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:22 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah it? Little rascals. Where it's a- No, of course not. Oh, that would be so funny. They should. Gerbils, himmler, I mean.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Yeah, you always call me that. Yeah, so all those guys- Who is the biggest rascal in his circle? Well, it's kind of hard. There was a bunch of them. Not convinced. Yeah, a bunch of them. Yeah, I mean, yeah, a bunch of knuckleheads. I mean, there's, you know, who's your favorite? Well, the most sadistic, the sadistic of the of like all the little rascals, I think would probably be him, you know, because
Starting point is 00:29:01 he was running the SS. Sure. And giving orders to do the mean stuff. And not just doing it, but really enjoying it. Well, he would enjoy the death camp stuff. All of it. I mean, he's back. I think he loved the philosophy of the Third Reich and the... The racial purity bit.
Starting point is 00:29:22 Loved it. Loved it. And he loved being in charge of the SS and like murdering and yeah. Yeah, it's interesting because when I overheard while following a sleep, is that these, these are- I don't wanna go out, I don't wanna be out of life,
Starting point is 00:29:33 but I'll say this, not a great guy. Not a good one, not a good bed egg. Yeah, is that these guys in his circle, the rascals? They were all about, it was more of a power jockey than true than wanting to do evil, but it sounds like this him or character was also about not only the power jockey, but the fun and in doing bad things. You loved it, you loved it. Yeah, I mean, they're all pretty bad dudes.
Starting point is 00:30:03 I think here's the thing. It was so outlandish to think that this party would get to power when they first attended to. That it wasn't even like, it wasn't even in the realm of possibilities. You know, and the fact that they went through a trying a coup to overthrow. I remember I heard that. And then failing at that and going to, that they went through a trying a coup to overthrow.
Starting point is 00:30:25 I remember I heard that. And then failing at that and going to, it was like the party was basically on the cusp of falling apart. Yeah. And so to think that I think when they actually got to power, it was all like, it was so addictive, so crazy that like, oh, now we're in power.
Starting point is 00:30:44 And then they went full force, full throttle. But that's what they say, you know, Tom, success is when hard work meets opportunity. And those Nazis, they stuck in it. It took 15 years to get into power. They did. That wasn't, I mean, Hitler was a young guy when he started and then he was, wow, wow, what, 47. He was doing is killing
Starting point is 00:31:05 he was a yeah you got to stick with it it's a mental game if there's anything you can take from the Hitler story it's stick to your guns yeah don't don't give up don't give up on your dreams yeah don't give up on your dreams yeah that's so cool that is so cool and they did have a fashion aesthetic that was pretty interesting. You know, I wasn't gonna bring that up, but. Well, I mean, look, they had a look. They had a narrative.
Starting point is 00:31:34 They had the story. It is crazy that you think that that term, to storm troopers, you know, is like, you know, the saw wars, but then you think of like the SS and they are like, oh, here's the thing, you know what's crazy? We're in, we have it in our head because we know about them, but I think if you didn't know about them
Starting point is 00:31:52 and you just saw, like if you had no idea and you just saw that, I think you know that it's evil. Yeah, you know what I mean? But I mean, since the dark darkness, the blackness, the blackness, the blackness, the blackness, the blackness. Everything from the swastika to like how they march, I don't think you'd be like, that's probably the good guys when you see the images, you know, you're right,
Starting point is 00:32:09 you're absolutely right. It's just terrifying. It's terrifying. Well, that's the point, right, to scare you in to there's a voting for Hitley. There's H dog with his homeboy him right there. There we are. Yeah, looking good. Wow, what a neat thing to delve into. So, you got a deep die. Well, I would say I just started watching all the docs, all the docs on World War II. Not just on on on this knucklehead. I did on on all the world strategy war strategies, which is a big dad theme. I watched a couple Pearl Harbor. What docs? Yeah, dad love war strategy. Like how do we defeat the enemy? I'll tell you something about fucking those guys which ones you know who you guys who started Pearl Harbor the fucking
Starting point is 00:32:53 Samsung Sony folks Fucking balls on these guys. I know, big balls. Big balls. Yeah. Big balls. We, uh, big balls. Yeah. Because it is horrific.
Starting point is 00:33:13 Like, I gotta see Oppenheimer. I gotta see Oppenheimer. I really wanna see it. I don't know. I heard it's fucking incredible. You know, dad's a little Oppenheimer. Dad's love fucking Oppenheimer. It is so horrific when you see details
Starting point is 00:33:27 and the long lasting effects. The atomic bomb. Yes. Well, of course, and I know what you're referring to. But then you watch Pearl Harbor and you're like, yeah, they deserve what they got. They get a head of comin'. You ask for it and dress what?
Starting point is 00:33:40 They try to tag a nice dress. You ask for it and here it is. So. Well, interesting you bring up the atomic bomb because I too have gone down a mother fucking hole. Yeah. It started on TikTok where I get all my information from. I am, this was your Hitler summer.
Starting point is 00:33:59 Oh my God. Come on, this is your summer of your... Yeah, I know, you are like... This is your summer of the furor. This is my summer of the, you are like, this is your summer of the fear. This is my summer of the aliens. They're fucking real. And if you guys aren't keeping up on David Grush and the congressional hearings,
Starting point is 00:34:14 you're out of your fucking mind. The real disclosure is here. I don't know what's happening. I don't know why now. Listen, I hear about this. Man, I am in the fifth dimension. Every day. I'm working on. At all hours.
Starting point is 00:34:26 I want to communicate with the aliens. If you can get me in communication with these aliens, I'm here for it. She's got the audio books. The podcasts, every fucking TikTok video about it, the new streams. I'm obsessed. I can't stop. I can't stop. There was one day.
Starting point is 00:34:43 I will save us in your defense. I will save us in your defense. I'll say this in your defense. Go ahead. The fact that there are congressional hearings and No, there used to be there's used to be a thing in a movie. Yeah, we're gonna movie would start and it'd be like Congress would be like hold on, you know, someone dropped the gavel and then they'd be like well, sir If the aliens and you'd be like, oh, this is a, like, okay, that's a fun fantasy premise to a movie that, that in Congress, they're talking to somebody about aliens, you know,
Starting point is 00:35:12 and then you escape into this fantasy movie. This is the story of this movie. The fact that it's actually happening and they're like, we have crafts, there are, you know, there are, we have the bodies and then, and this is like really happening and then they're like, okay, crafts, there are, you know, there are, we have the bodies. And then, and this is like really happening. And then they're like, okay, well, well, that's interesting. And then they're like, you know, have you been to a sandals resort? Like, right?
Starting point is 00:35:33 I knew. Nobody gives up. Yeah. AOC is asking questions about aliens. Yeah. This is fucking nuts. It is nuts. And, and look, I got into, I was never a UFO person until I stumble
Starting point is 00:35:47 on TikTok on David Grush. This guy that was head of A-Tip, they always have these stupid acronyms and the skiff. And he's saying he's a whistleblower. And he's like, look, we have not only alien craft. Yeah. We have their bodies. And there's these deep state operations working now. They're utilizing Aliens technology. Rememberable moments. Yeah. That we were reverse engineering stuff in the deep state. Listen, Duncan and I have been back and forth. I call Duncan right after the congressional hearing and he goes, yeah, man, I'm live streaming it right now. And he and I got into I mean, I'm the, I'm ready. I'm ready for the holidays. So I hear some of them for people to fall. They're already here, though.
Starting point is 00:36:26 It's too late. The government is absolutely in possession of UAPs. They call it UAPs, not UFOs now. Like it changes. Because an identified aerial phenomenon. Yeah, so UFO has the kind of negative connotation to be in the country. So they have to rebrand it, you know.
Starting point is 00:36:44 So David Grasch, the former US intelligence officer told the panel that he is absolutely certainly federal government is in possession of UAPs. And when asked, does that mean there is money in the budget that is said to go to a program, but it doesn't, and it goes to something else. And he said, yes, I have specific knowledge of that. Meaning we have a program in the government to deal with unidentified, what is it? Ariel phenomenon. Phenomenon. That the government is aware of. Yeah. Scour down works. And the next one, this was obviously the one that I think it would be the most exciting for someone. When he was asked, do we get the pilots? He said, yes, and then they go, is it, are they human?
Starting point is 00:37:29 He said, no, there are non-human biologic. Biologic. Biologic. I have damn it Tom, I've watched this a million times. Well, we're reading it to an audience. Human biologic. That's the whole point. Non-human, now here's a deal, man.
Starting point is 00:37:41 It says, Grush said he prefers to use the term nonhuman rather than alien or extraterrestrial. And I believe they asked him, why do you use that term? And he goes, well, because there's things we don't understand. Meaning, so a lot of people, the comments were like, oh, he could be a squirrel piloting the thing. Well, then he would have fucking said,
Starting point is 00:37:58 we found a chimp or a squirrel, nonhuman biologist. So he's also inferring, by the way, these nonhuman entities are already here because he said that they're interdimensional. That means they're fucking here already in the fifth dimension, the fourth dimension, we just can't perceive it, it's fucking crazy. They're in the oceans, they're in the government.
Starting point is 00:38:19 I'm not here all day, I've been here in this all day. I am fucking, please. David Grush, if you come on your mom's house, you can disclose, put you in a skiff, you can tell us all the classified details. What if the non-human biologic literally, no, gets into, like, is shown in Congress, and the first thing it says is like.
Starting point is 00:38:39 I'm Jewish. Right? Isn't that crazy? I'm looking for a girl. Crazy. I'm looking for a girlfriend. Okay, officials must establish a safe and transparent reporting process. Because there is no process right now. People are told to shut up, basically, when the pilots do encounter these. Yes, and there's no way to report it, and people are afraid to, because you're called
Starting point is 00:39:01 crazy. That commercial airline pilots are saying, oh yeah, we see UFOs constantly. Meaning when you're on your United Flight or American Airlines or whatever. They just look at each other in the cockpit. Yeah. And by the way, because they're not on official radar or whatever being discussed.
Starting point is 00:39:15 We're about to touch down in Chicago wherever they had a good flight. Make sure you see a fucking alien craft. Just flew over it. And we'll be gone on the ground shortly. Thank you very much. But it's also a hazard because you could be hit by one of these things because they're not,
Starting point is 00:39:30 they're not in the dialogue. The description of one of those, of how it flew. Anti-gravity, Tom, we already know about this. Bob Lazar disclosed this. He was on the JRE back in 2017 or 2018. It's called anti-gravity utilizing also the element 115. Okay. It is now on the periodic table of elements.
Starting point is 00:39:51 Which gets to you the most, that there's a stigma associated with sightings and it silences those possible witnesses. Yeah, but why now? The big question in the UFO community is why disclosure now? Why is the government? Well, a lot of people like to go, because you just see it immediately.
Starting point is 00:40:07 It's like, this is to distract us from this other thing. And of course, they're conveniently doing this now because everything is so bad in the world, you know? Yeah, but they don't, there's other way, I don't know. This is a big card. The UFO card's a big card, and no one cares. That's the best part. Is that on TikTok?
Starting point is 00:40:25 Everybody is like, the government told us there's aliens, and nobody gives a shit. Yeah, that kind of, that part is kind of true. Nobody cares. Nobody really cares. Nobody cares. But it's kind of interesting that nobody really cares. It's almost the most interesting part is like,
Starting point is 00:40:39 how come nobody really cares? I just don't want to care. Yeah, that's what's fascinating. I know. We're more upset about the but light commercial than we are aliens exist and might be among us right now living in another dimension. I think the reason is that we actually got to the point
Starting point is 00:40:56 where they go, okay, this might be real. There might be aliens and people are like, and then what am I supposed to do about that? How does this affect my life in any, my mortgage payment is still do? That's what they're saying, you know. Are aliens supposed to do about that? Right. What the fuck? How does this affect my life in any, my mortgage payment is still do. That's what they're saying, yeah. Are aliens going to pay my bills? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:10 People are like, that's what they're saying I take time. It's like, yeah, but I can't, eggs are fucking eight dollars a card. Yeah, dude. So nothing changes. I get it. I get it. When your reality is tough.
Starting point is 00:41:19 But anyway, so there are, I believe there are some crafts that we have reverse engineer the technology. I'm back in Roswell, that first crash, you may know that the CIA and the other, whatever branch of government were formed like, within months after that Roswell crash. The Air Force was designated right after that. Everything happened like three months after Roswell. Anyway, we have reverse engineer some of these crafts or some of these are probably our thing, but not all of them. Super Sonic speeds, two mock two human beings fall apart. Here's a thing if to the visiting species
Starting point is 00:41:53 to Earth, I'd just like to say welcome, howdy. Our new alien overlords, we welcome you. I recommend the brisket if you're gonna come to Austin. Here's what I got thinking about Tom. What's that? Is that these aliens are probably already in our systems, in our government, and specifically may already be famous country singers? How's that? Have you thought about, hold on, it'll explain why the awkwardness, save Ukraine, Crane.
Starting point is 00:42:26 What's that? It's an alien trying to be human, Thomas. It does feel like that. It does feel like that. He's mimicking what it is to be a person because they don't, he doesn't know. It's a good morning. Garth Brooks here, you know what today is?
Starting point is 00:42:36 It's the seventh anniversary of his life. On Alphysin Turray. I see. So what do you say, on its studio G? Let's do a little Garth request thing, okay? I'll bring my guitar, you bring the songs. Let's have some fun.
Starting point is 00:42:48 He plop, he plop. Yeah. So if you don't know this, pretty much everybody's blocked now. Literally. Literally. Literally for all blocks. I think that by the way, he must have hired somebody new. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:43:02 A youngster. A gentleman came in and they were like, you just gotta block these folks. He's like, oh. And then he was like, I hope it is like two dozen people and he was like, one,
Starting point is 00:43:11 no. So we have, we, by the way, the entire YMH studio has zero access to the G account. And here's what I could say, this is not the time to back down.
Starting point is 00:43:26 We need you to step up where we can't. Right? Support our cause. You're going to be weak. You're going to be strong. Your brothers are sitting here just waiting for the fucking hella evac. We don't have food, we don't have water. Are you gonna leave us here?
Starting point is 00:43:50 Are you gonna step up? Just something to think about. Are you motivating your soldiers? Like your buddy H did? Give us a speech. Give us a motivation. I'm just gonna speak to Jesus Christ. The end is here. We're pushing forward. You got just like that. You end is here. I wasn't I wasn't pushing forward.
Starting point is 00:44:06 You got just like that. You've been influenced. You know it's one of the motivating. I'm talking about I'm talking about H on stage now. I have a H bit now. Yeah. I was about to do a deep dive into history, man. Yeah, I go all the way in with H now.
Starting point is 00:44:22 We've changed. The summer has changed us, Tom. Who are we? Look at death, it's still in my mind. But I agree, guys. Now is the time, all hands on deck. This is a really crucial moment. Yeah, it really is.
Starting point is 00:44:37 He looks great by the way. She looks really good. I mean, for an alien hybrid human, humanoid species who's been here. Yeah. By the way, I saw that he like funded some like police department building in Nashville. And I was like, isn't that the savviest move somebody can do is like start helping the cops out. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:02 Yeah. Oh, y'all need help. I hope you'll help you out. Yeah, you're like, hey, oh, y'all need help. I'll help you. I'll help you look. Is there someone's gonna miss me? I'm gonna join the search party. Right. It's like what my dad used to do in the 80s.
Starting point is 00:45:13 I wanna help catch the bad guys. The bad guys. Yeah. Well, that makes sense. You know what? There's a theory out there in the UFO community that we have a treaty with the aliens where they're allowed to take a certain amount of humans
Starting point is 00:45:26 and do experiments on them. Yep. I'm just saying, it's kind of a weird coincidence. I don't want to get us into any trouble. Let's change the topic. This is something fun that I wanted to show you. In the US, when he was a local, it's a sauna in Detroit. It was a black area, so most of the men
Starting point is 00:45:47 were African-American, you're saying. And they used to say, pass over the white boy. Oh, not even, you know, and they used to actually physically put our 19 men. And they physically, just to pass me over to the middle of them all. And some of these black men were fat
Starting point is 00:46:07 And they got fabulous tons What yeah, I loved it. I loved it. You know, I used to come and come and come and I wasn't expecting that Four or five times in a couple of hours was not unusual. Now, of course, I am 17 next year. And one of my great sadness is this. I can't do anything like that. Oh, and that's a big set.
Starting point is 00:46:36 That's the greatest regret in his life, that he can't come back. I can't come four and five times in a day now. A bunch of black guys. It's one of the saddest things in one of the greatest sorrows of my life. It's one of the saddest things in one of the greatest sorrows of my life. That's it. That's it.
Starting point is 00:46:47 I'm 70 and I can't come as much as I used to. I mean, I've got to be bats and I have to be satisfied with doom. Because if I try for number three, I'll kill myself. I mean, my heart's beating. I know that if I die, it'll probably be there with all those people there. I've got to tell you. The path attendant will be in awful trouble, wouldn't it? I wish I were a gay man. I gotta say, I mean, doesn't this kind of show you,
Starting point is 00:47:12 I mean, this one is, this is obviously gay, but doesn't this really highlight the difference between men and women? Because this is not that different from a straight man. No. I mean, it really isn't. A straight guy is also like, you know what, the fucking saddest thing in my life right now, you're like, what is it? You can't come
Starting point is 00:47:28 as much as I used to. And that's coming so important to men. Why do you think that? Why? Because you physically have to get this poison out of your body. Yeah. It's a physical necessity to get it out of you. So it's always like a delivery mechanism and the touches feel nice on your painter. But I know you like because women enjoy touches and sex. We don't need. I don't. Yeah. I don't know. It's a biological necessity. I feel like women can just shut that thing off. Oh yeah. And like if they're not feeling it from the world or whoever they're interacting with, it's like it's not a big thing for them to be like, oh yeah, I haven't, like a single woman. I haven't slept with somebody in a long time.
Starting point is 00:48:07 And not bothered by it. But but also too, don't forget that women's bodies are cyclical. So if I'm ovulating, which, you know, then I'm really fired up. I'm ready to f, like I would want to be handed around to a group of black guys too, you know what I mean? But then when your body's shutting you down
Starting point is 00:48:22 for period time, you're like, don't touch me. Don't look at me. I don't want to find it. I'm talking about shutting you down for period time, you're like, don't touch me, don't look at me. I don't wanna find it. I'm talking about shutting it down for long years. I know. Not just when you're cyclically, obviously. Challenge, yeah. No, no, no, no, I'm just saying, like, women can go like,
Starting point is 00:48:34 I'm just not. Some brads are. Yeah, I can't. Some brads are low T, right? Like, I don't know, low E, low P, low progesterone, low estrogen. Yeah, they're just maybe from only. But dudes basically, well, there are dudes who are not very sexually driven
Starting point is 00:48:48 Those are little kings. Yes This guy's about to turn 70 choose that and he's just like but How great would the saddest thing in my whole life? Can't come like I used to you know, but that's the beauty of being a gay man They don't have the burdens. He has to be satisfied with two nuts and that's a bummer to him Two comes is all I get these days Yeah, he can just go to a bathhouse and there's dude just waiting to his deeds He used to get passed around. I know. What a great day for somebody like that.
Starting point is 00:49:25 What a great life. Could you imagine? I can't imagine it as a woman, like the biological thing of I could get pregnant or whatever. Like that doesn't exist for you guys. It must be nice. That's so gay. They just have it better.
Starting point is 00:49:41 They really do. Yeah. They're so superior. Fucking lucky. But let's be into the interesting part is that when women get together, I hear that they don't, they stop having sex. Lesbian bed death is what they call it. Really? When two broads get together, they're like, we're just friends now. Like it shuts down. I'm not saying for all because obviously there's exceptions. But yeah, it probably happens though in gay couples as they age though too. Well the gay couples that I'm friends with opposite day actually because they don't have
Starting point is 00:50:12 children or the responsibilities that we do they travel a lot and then they have a group of men who they regularly fuck outside of their own pairing. So they'll be like yeah do you feel like fucking Rick and Tim today? Yeah, okay, we'll invite them over. Let's fuck tonight. Like it's just great. I know. It's fucking amazing.
Starting point is 00:50:31 Man. Thank you, sir. Yeah. It's so cool. It's so great. It's so cool. Anyway. It's the coolest. I also along these lines of discussion,
Starting point is 00:50:42 I have a cap report that I like to share with Emily. Oh, please go forward. Please go forward. I was talking to my friend Sean and Jimmy, so this actually originated in a dialogue with them. We were talking about gay men and specifically bisexual men. Now, we were saying how, look, I know they say they exist, but in my experience with bisexual men, doesn't
Starting point is 00:51:08 last very long. It's usually you're bisexual for a short window on your way to Gaytown, and you park it at Gaytown and you don't go back to bisexual land. So I'm going to put it out there, I think, bisexual men are cap. You heard it here first. Bisexual men are cap. Wow heard it here first. My sexual men are cap. Wow. What do you think, Annie?
Starting point is 00:51:27 Yeah, this has been reported to me by many of my reporters around the world. And I do agree. I do agree. And I think the reason for it is that it starts that way. I think you start by, you're like, maybe a little curious. Maybe let me see what it feels like. Can I get over my discomfort with it? And then I imagine what happens. I
Starting point is 00:51:50 don't have any experience fucking to do, but I imagine what happens is that it turns out we're better than that within women at that too. So when you fuck We're already better than women at basically everything So I bet when you fuck a guy as a guy You're like oh fuck this is how it can be yeah, of course. Yeah, and by the way, he's not wrong I mean, I'm sure yeah, yeah, I'm not saying like men are better at look Are you saying Colin? Are you saying gender equality is cap? Is that another one? Gender equality is cap?
Starting point is 00:52:28 Hold on. What is gender? You know? Who, what is a woman? What is a man? I don't know. You know what I was asking you. Hey, how are you?
Starting point is 00:52:35 What's your name? What's your pronoun? But I think you're right. Any this theory of like, imagine, but the same could go for being with another woman. Oh my gosh, imagine a woman that same could go for being with another woman. Oh my gosh, imagine a woman that knows what it's like to have a V.
Starting point is 00:52:48 Like, we should all be gay then. Yeah. We should all be gay. Like, who fucks him boy? So, here's the thing that, I'm interested to hear, we're gonna hear from people on this. We're gonna hear from people on this.
Starting point is 00:53:04 First of all, here's the categories of the people you'll hear from. You're gonna hear from guys who go, yep, I used to, I said I was by, turns out I'm gay. You're gonna hear from women who go, I dated a guy who was openly by, turns out he's gay. What's more interesting though is, because there are gonna be people who go like,
Starting point is 00:53:26 I get what you're saying and those people exist. But by the way, I am currently actually by. Yeah, here's what I want. And they're going to, they're going to expect, because I think what happens is straight guys, who just like women, it is, it's the reason reason you even hear this kind of like, it's incomprehensible to think that you could be sexually attracted to a man. So, it doesn't register. And we've all met or heard from or know people who are doing what I said where they claimed
Starting point is 00:54:01 to be. Right. And they're like, actually, it was the gateway drug. It was, I was, it was like, it's not a low weed. And guess what, heroin is the shit. So. I like thick and balls. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:14 But I would actually love to hear, because I know we're gonna hear from people who go, you guys, that might be true, but I am actually. It's an anomaly. I'd be very curious. I know somebody. I should reach out to the person. Who's a lifelong, here's what I want to hear from.
Starting point is 00:54:26 I'm gonna reach out. Here's the guy I want to hear from. Yep. He's this guy's age. He's 70 years old. He's a New York City old school gay. And he's like, you know what? I go back and forth. I go, I have relationships. I want to hear about people who have relationships with men
Starting point is 00:54:42 and then women. Men that have relationships with men and then women. They go back relationships with men and then women, they go back and forth. That is a genuinely bisexual person in my state. I would agree. Not just like, hey, I'm with a woman and then every now and then I dip out and make, I don't know, is that bisexual then?
Starting point is 00:54:55 That sounds bisexual too. But then is that just a gay who's not being fully gay? And they want to stay married to have all the perks of being a straight person? Yeah, I think a spot on on that, you know, they want to, it's more for the presentation, I think. Correct. Yeah. And also, might I add that for a man to crossover into gay town is such a stigma that you really got to want it.
Starting point is 00:55:24 You really got to want it. You really got to want it. You do have to want it. For a woman to be like, I'm bisexual, it's like a big deal. There's no stigma. Okay, I was gonna tell you this when you brought this up. The funny thing is, even when you're like a guy and you meet a guy and they're like, yeah, you know,
Starting point is 00:55:37 I'm bisexual. I go, most guys go. Bullshit. Yeah. Right, you're like, really? But when you meet a woman who's like, I know a woman who is married to a man and she's like, sometimes I hook up with women
Starting point is 00:55:55 and I don't go, I think she's a lesbian. Correct. I'm like, yeah, I buy it. I don't know what it is. I don't know if it's just, I just go, I believe that she is sexually interested in both. But a guy who says that you're like, come on dog. Like, right.
Starting point is 00:56:09 Because it's such a crazy thing for a man in our society to go to a D, another D. And he used to do most, it's so major. I'm not saying I root, but most women that are straight women go like, no, you're, you're get to that guy. Of course. They go like, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:56:30 He's gonna be gay because every guy, listen, I've been around. That's straight on you. How straight on you? I have many gay male friends. There is a time when they go, I'm bisexual and that time is usually in their 20s when they're figuring out the road to gainus.
Starting point is 00:56:45 You know? Yeah. Yeah, it's just, it's an interim. It's not a final destination. And I know that's gonna get me into trouble, but I don't care. I'm stupid and I think stupid does. Send us if you thought you were by or actually gay
Starting point is 00:56:59 or if you're saying you are currently bisexual and you're a man, and you want to tell us about it. So that's an email, your momspodcast at There's no house in the email address. It's your momspodcast at In the subject line, please put bisexual and loving it. And we will respond.
Starting point is 00:57:28 No, that's so gay. You know, we should ask Tim Dylan. Why would we ask him? He's gay. I know, but does he believe that there are bisexual men? This is a problem. Well, I'm gonna reach out to an op, I know a guy who's openly,
Starting point is 00:57:40 I'm gonna ask him to send us a video, you know. I'll play it. Maybe I'll ask him to do a call with us, you know. Yeah. And if I can have, by the way, since we're going to cap reports, I mean, I got a big one this week. I don't know. Oh, you have a new big cap report?
Starting point is 00:57:54 I have a big one. Okay. I have... Besides gender equality, you say? Besides gender equality. Besides ED, PMS, all the acronyms. That is dope. The next one that I got, we gotta stop this,
Starting point is 00:58:06 especially those guys out there, we gotta stop panic attacks. Panic attacks. Anxiety is cap. Panic attacks are fucking, shut the fuck up bro. What are you complaining about? If you look up the definition of panic attack and it will literally in the definition Define its own cappness If I might create that
Starting point is 00:58:34 Okay, that adjective can we Can we actually? Scroll down Mayow clinics pretty reliable source. Go to three down. That one. Let's see, hit that. Scroll, open bigger.
Starting point is 00:58:53 A panic attack is a sudden episode of intense fear that triggers severe physical reactions when there is no real danger or apparent cause. Panic attacks can be very frightening. When panic attacks occur, you might think you're losing control having a heart attack or even dying. Panic attacks can be very frightening. When panic attacks occur, you might think you're losing control, having a heart attack or even dying. You hear that? You might think that you're losing control. There is no real danger or apparent cause. But those people internally believe that this is happening. Exactly. And you're
Starting point is 00:59:19 saying that's bullshit. It's all in your head. Yeah. It's all in your head. It's all bullshit. It's all bullshit. It's definitely going Definitely gonna make people so upset that's cool Some people who like really suffer From crippling and stuff. They're traumatized. He's like quit your bullshit. PTSG people Yeah, and they're like they go through therapy and they get medication He's like stop being a bitch These doctors that they're trying to keep you down. Yep. Forget all that bullshit. Look, what's the, what's the,
Starting point is 00:59:48 what is it, the damn prescription for panic attacks? What do you do? Get a patent. Breath. That's the, that's the, I also get psychi, like, you know, you get, you get meds, bro. Yeah, you get meds like Xanax,
Starting point is 01:00:02 get a patent, stuff like that. After you, you know, have been told for so long that you have such an issue that you have to get these things, just, here you go. Just, there you go. If you suffer from crippling anxiety, please send us an email,
Starting point is 01:00:19 your mom's podcast at Subject line line panic is cap I don't even have to let you guys take it from here. I can't even help you on this one. Yeah, this will help you out This was I found this I sent this in immediately and I was like pull this immediately Because this was on YouTube. I don't even know if it's still on YouTube But this was on YouTube and I am not making this up. No, I don't think you know. Oh, this is not the, okay.
Starting point is 01:00:51 I don't know, maybe you know the about this too. I don't think I told you about this. Oh, okay, okay. So. Because there's one that I showed you that Krashon sent me that you're like, how the boys ripped this in. Oh, really? Is this it?
Starting point is 01:01:00 Oh, let's see. Okay, maybe this is it. Sorry, there's a lot that's going on. So, it's a lot, guys, it hit Leroy Aliens, Garth. For reference, this is how I Sorry. There's a lot that's going on. It's a lot guys to hit layer aliens Garth for reference. This is how Harry my butt is right now All right, so step one is to squeeze this cream onto your hand. This is the one. I'm going to be doing just that Oh All right now it's has to apply a thick even layer to cover hair do not rub it in so let's do that
Starting point is 01:01:27 Oh my god he's got a great little fruity ass yeah he's good looking guy. Don't forget to cover the cheeks as well setting a timer for three minutes don't go past three minutes because I did that with my armpits like I went to five minutes and it literally burned and stung so bad we have one one minute left. So far, there's no stinging. Nothing's hurting. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good.
Starting point is 01:01:50 It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good.
Starting point is 01:01:58 It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. It's all good. I should send him a video of my asshole. No, shit. Because his asshole would be like, if they waxed my asshole, it would look like his asshole. I know.
Starting point is 01:02:08 His asshole's better than mine. Anyway, he's spreading his butt cheeks open, so you see his dick and balls from the back. On YouTube. On YouTube, and it's still up. I don't know if it's still up. Is it still up? It's gotta be down.
Starting point is 01:02:20 It's still up. It is up. And I think it's because it's like he's it's education And this is why my kids are not like I can make the same video if they leave it up Oh my god, please hey guys, here's my asshole today. Yeah area sticker here may require more time So let's check a small area first. Ah. Oh my god.
Starting point is 01:02:49 That was one swipe. This is so fucking... Oh my god. This guy is out of his mind. God damn. A lot of the hair skin out you guys. Yeah, that's how it works. He's got like a lemon zest.
Starting point is 01:02:59 Yeah. Dude, this house looks better than mine. Oh my god. Okay, bro. Holy fuck. What's that shit coming out of it? This is how my boat looks pre-rends and pre-shower and post hair removal cream I'm going to take a shower and clean the area and come back and show you what the results are
Starting point is 01:03:17 Thank you so much Sky skin care. This is how my butt looks post shower Okay, I got it and post hair removal cream Beautiful. I gotta do whoa He didn't have to do that. This is not an education This is not obviously there are some hairs on my cheek still like stray hairs But like overall I think we did really good and I think this near hair removal cream did a really good job Removing my butt hairs and so yeah, that's how you get rid of your butt think that's near hair removal cream did a really good job at removing
Starting point is 01:03:45 my butt hairs. And so yeah, that's how you get rid of your butt hairs using the near hair cream. I just want to say something. So many questions. So many questions. Any hair removal creams in general. Thank you guys so much for watching. I love you. I don't talk to you soon. Here's the thing. It was educational. I'm lying because I'm thinking about trying this. Yeah, me too. I'm lying because I'm thinking about trying this. Yeah, me too. But he also, he did the asshole wink where he like, like that you see in a porn.
Starting point is 01:04:12 He was like, check out and he like made his asshole. And then this is on YouTube. And if this fucking smile or he's like, they like, good night. I you. Oh, it's fucking crazy, dude. It is crazy. Well, here's how many views does it have?
Starting point is 01:04:29 Yeah, let's see. Right now, I should say, it's gonna. That's amazing. And he's not giving you a gentle smile. He's giving the chimps smile because the eyes aren't, like, he's not smiling with his eyes. He's giving you like that weird, like, because that just thought just occurred to him, like, oh, that's right, my mom and dad can pull up YouTube. Anybody my employer.
Starting point is 01:04:47 Um, by the way, 38 million views. I think we should start making these videos and posting them on this channel. 38 million views. Worth every watch by the way. Hey can I ask you this? Yeah. Do you think that the Nair I mean isn't it gonna burn your B hole though like in your visein? He said can I put this on my vagina? Can you look it up? Because then I'd rather Nair my vage That'll be great. Can you Nair your visein? Yeah, dude. I had no idea It can't be used on directly, should not be used right. Yeah, because it like burns the hair off. So we
Starting point is 01:05:27 just clean it on his b-hole. Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna try it. I'm gonna try it. The suit tonight. Yeah. Let's instacart some air. Yeah, putting it in the fucking thing right now, dude. Man, his asshole really look good, though. Yeah, that was amazing. I didn't know you could do that with Nair. Fuck. You know what we haven't, oh, I wanted to tell you this. This is pretty exciting. You brought this up. It's been a while. It's been a while. Are we going there? I'm ready. It's been a while. You know the excitement of when I found him back
Starting point is 01:06:05 It's I forgot about him. I'm also by the way. I'm surprised I'm surprised he's alive I'm not gonna say that I'm not Ready. Oh my god. I'm fucking prompted Come on have fun and enjoy we got we are a beautiful day out there Yeah, got it do some get out there and enjoy the world Do some yard work maybe go some like app like app. Yeah, you guys deserve it. You worked all week. Thank you You met money can I say something? If you're not familiar with the King of the 18s. Yeah, who is he for the people who don't know?
Starting point is 01:06:49 This guy, you know, we got to know him over the years. Um, that is good morning, ladies. It's 6 o'clock in the morning. It's time to go to work. Get up and let them boob sang. Come on, make some videos right when you get out of bed before you put that for on there you go Very nice boob you guys keep it up. I love the videos of the no brawl Good afternoon my queens above 18. That's what he became known as
Starting point is 01:07:19 I'm sure that we've done with a marker just to show you what's incredible shirt. Incredible design. Muscle shirts. Muscle shirts. You know, uh, Farrell is now doing the Louis Vuitton designs. I don't know if you know that he's the actual creative director now at, um, I believe it's at Louis Vuitton. Uh-huh. You should do that. Well, you know what I was thinking? Is that I would actually buy that shirt, that shirt. I'm saying with the handwriting on there, that would be so rad. I mean, that could sell as a Vivian Westwood original.
Starting point is 01:07:54 It's very punk rock. Very cool. I think it's so... Or my Queens above 18. I have got a very special request going out. This video is the very very very request very special. Very request. It's going out to a queen above 18. She's very special. 50 years old. Wow wow wow. Wow. Very request. Yeah. Is the Asian lady at what? So relax.
Starting point is 01:08:25 You're very sorry, relax, massage. Good man. Can you give me my kings and queens above 18? Well, you get the idea. So can I tell you something that he's also really big on? He's real big on. It's a beautiful day. Get those feet on the ground.
Starting point is 01:08:42 Get the day going. Get outside and do something. And he often does this message while lying down. He's never giving the, even the suggestion that his feet are on the ground. And then he started his day. He's like, let's go do some yard work, let's go see the world, he's literally.
Starting point is 01:09:02 He's doing that, he's doing that. He's laying down doing it always. Always bad angle. And not only that, this video, no broad day. Oh, there you go. No broad day. Keep up the challenge. No, ringer, bro. Yeah. Let's take it all the way up until October. How about that? Wow. This is official. You heard the King, everybody. I know that's going to get cold.
Starting point is 01:09:29 OK, the King is spoken. And why are his glasses fogging up? Probably from his breath. He probably already got his feet on the ground. Had a real active morning laying down for a rest. Wait, so he's telling us the ladies, the queens above each team, No bra until October?
Starting point is 01:09:47 Until October, yeah. For a long time. No bra challenge. That's a lot of challenge. October. Ha ha ha. He literally did that the way a king from the old era would be like,
Starting point is 01:10:00 my people, nothing else. Like, we will all eat meat every day until October, he just issued a challenge. He declared it, let them eat cake. Do I register for this challenge like the New York City marathon? I think you just send him the video and then he goes approved.
Starting point is 01:10:17 Yeah, approved. Okay, on real, he's still at it though, I was worried because we didn't hear from him for a while a long time and But when I met when we met him we did a sketch with him about what two years ago now and this guy makes fucking Bert look like David Goggins. Let's be honest like this guy does not Move a lot. No, and he said that he had some knee trouble He he does work as a truck driver, so he sits a lot
Starting point is 01:10:44 Yeah, and he may have some health issues. So I'm glad that he's back and telling us to go. All right, enjoy your day, have fun. Thank you. Always enjoy the day. Always. I always. I always. I always.
Starting point is 01:10:57 I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always. I always you safe today. The kingdom is safe and everybody's good. He doesn't have much
Starting point is 01:11:08 Peppie guys you guys have a one day free the girls no bra'll months Till October No, but two months. Yeah, yeah, he's math is suffering to my god. Remember when he had his merchandise shop and we tried to help him Oh my god, we remember the process his merchandise shop and we tried to help him. Oh my God. We remember the process. Yeah, it's it was multiple emails. You want one of these shirts? He could just send me an email.
Starting point is 01:11:31 Tell me tell me which shirt and which size. Then send me another email. Well, I'll send you a email back about where to send payment. Yeah, it's to Kathy. You have to write the check out. Check the Kathy. You send that to her. And then when we get that, send us your address in the 30 mail and we'll know where to ship it.
Starting point is 01:11:51 You know, this is a great way to sell space, dude. I think we literally don't need to use Squarespace to build a fucking website. Jesus Christ. Another super fucking cool guy who is really the legend of all the coolest, the coolest guy that's ever existed. And you know, we love him. He is a dear, dear friend. I would say, you know, like the origin of what this show is about is, you know, my favorite. If you're a hot black black guy you want to fuck me at 23 95 if you want any how are you? I
Starting point is 01:12:30 Think so if you are having if you haven't paid attention to this it's been a few months of RPC leaving increasingly More critical emails or excuse me comments. He leaves them often multiple times under the same post, sometimes from different accounts. And he does it everywhere, he does it on all the. So he wrote on this as I think on the Facebook post, on the right on Facebook page, it says, this so-called mess of a painting is not what I wear.
Starting point is 01:13:08 I don't wear this hat, only for a character I do, which is basically the thing I do wear this hat, but when I'm in character. Right. The background would need flames. I should have a cigar and a black cowboy hat on in a black open shirt, and then you have the real devil in me. Lucifer's Lair.
Starting point is 01:13:24 Right. Lucifer's lair. Right. Lucifer's lair. Why was I put near Uncle Biglips, shameless bedbog, no shine picture as I just see something in him you can't. I'm never jealous but he follows me and tries to compete with me. He lives in a men's shelter. He's in a mental institution patient, not me. Send 50 videos to YMH all the time.
Starting point is 01:13:46 I'm a professional comedian and performer and don't do that. You always makes that claim that he's a professional comic. Right. Well, to be fair, he does run the Coney Island drag show. He does the karaoke at Coney Island every Sunday. So this, by the way, is just something that I see on some of the things, right? I mean, this is like, this is actually an elaborate way for him to, but he also, it means there's more than this, you know?
Starting point is 01:14:11 So here's a DM, take my picture off that wall. I have my own show, not YMH. Take down my picture. Take down my picture and then there's, he sent a heart emoji. It doesn't make sense. Yeah. Very complicated. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:14:27 Someone wrote to him, why don't you like YMH anymore? They played me for a fool. I came before on stink no shine. And his picture came before me. I don't come in second place. Oh, that's what it is. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:14:41 He thinks he's second place. And he said those lame comics made fun of me. It was not funny. So we've shown his videos to people and like, Louie had this big reaction to it. I don't know if you're... Yes, of course. Louie had a big reaction.
Starting point is 01:14:54 If you don't know, you can look it up. And ever since then, I noticed RPC would do post about Louie, Trashing Louie. And anybody that has said something, he gets very, very upset, you know. Take my picture off that wall of shame, disgrace, you know, it keeps going. This is him doing Uncle Booty shines is in the house. He likes, he likes, what does he like? Black guys.
Starting point is 01:15:21 Black guys who like the fuck. So he means of said that Uncle isn't in to him. I don't know of said that on his an into him. I don't know. I don't know. Um, that's him doing his on show. Yeah. Yeah. That's nice. This is like he is gay. Tom is turning gay. Oh, take my picture down. So phony. Wait, are you gay? I'm gay. Are you bisexual? I don't know. I don't think so. I don't think so. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:49 So he's turning this around now. Oh, jeez. Oh, this is my other nickname. Tom Ham sandwiched cigarette. So he started to call me Tom Ham sandwiched cigarette. Self-red doing his, he's a jerk, no talent. Fake laughs on track, no talent, you're sick, big lips shameless shine.
Starting point is 01:16:08 So he's now, he's like kind of tying me in with him. And he's spiraling a little bit. And he keeps calling me ham sandwich. Which is funny. I love what you're saying. See you there. No, and Theo, meet head Von and Louis CK is jealous. So guys who have seen the video and made a comment,
Starting point is 01:16:25 he also attacks them, you know? I was really, really getting out there. Yeah. You know, I don't know, but he goes for these cycles and then we call him and then he'll act like everything's fine. He's like, yeah, he's a big little thing. But the difference is that now he doesn't answer. He won't answer the calls.
Starting point is 01:16:41 He won't answer, he won't do calls. We were looking for interns and he wrote, do not take this offer. answer. He won't answer the calls. He won't answer. He won't do calls. We had a, we were looking for interns and he wrote, do not take this offer. You do not need to work for them. Interns. I look good there. He's telling me not to leave Garth alone. Oh, I did like that he called me Miss Piggy. That was really funny. From my last special, I wore all pink. So, I like that. And by the way, he also does this thing where like anytime I leave a, I put a post up, you know, like of anything, like if it's a, if it's an Instagram post.
Starting point is 01:17:17 Yeah. If I do a quick look at the comments, there's always something from him, always, that says like, go away, Tom. He just writes like, go away, we're all sick of you. And I'm like, wait, what? Oh yeah, here it is. I did a screen grab. I posted something and he wrote boring.
Starting point is 01:17:36 And then he wrote, on the same post, he wrote like 20 minutes later, he went back and he wrote, look, it Tom Tom Tom. Tom Tom. Always Tom Tom Tom You're not funny nor attractive You're not worth a penny to see Yeah, this is like and it happens like every post every post He does this then apparently I didn't even know he's always doing he's doing videos all the time, you know Hey What is it?
Starting point is 01:18:06 Now time's the go as a coach. We seen the pay-up you had and you made your staff give you money Tommy Tommy What do we do you're a lion sack of dog meat? You lie lie lie And what happened you got to pay the good you know you're a coach you are so corrupt at Tommy Tom ham sandwich self-presagora you're done with and you don't take my thing out I'm gonna expose you to you uh extract your all those magazines and
Starting point is 01:18:42 all about your bills and affairs that you have on your staff and on the cover money. You won't be alive. Your mom's hell cured you all. You're gonna go and cap that cap that baby. Cap, he's watching the cap report. He's watching. Well listen, Robert. That's a beautiful necklace. We love you. I think Robert looks great. Robert, he looks really good actually. Robert, that is a top tier. We love you. I think Robert looks great. Robert, he looks really good, actually. Robert, that is a top tier. We love you. I don't know where this is coming from. I know.
Starting point is 01:19:09 You're clearly above Uncle Shine. You're one of the original people that we love the most. And, you know, he's making a reference to, this is terrible. When I coached any. Right, for the basketball team. He's like, oh, you're a fucking coach. Yeah, you know, he takes these things so seriously.
Starting point is 01:19:27 It's like Robert, this is a comedy show, you know? Yeah, I know. Please, no, no, I know I know I'm Tom Zagora. No, don't take my picture. No, no, I have to see my buddy. Please, I know I didn't like the book. Please, please. Oh, that's another one he does that I didn't write the book, please, please. Oh, that's another one he does that I didn't write my book.
Starting point is 01:19:48 That's interesting. Yeah. But, well, okay, I watched you write it. I mean, I know, and it's also like, there's really specific stuff in the book. Yeah, I know. It's about like my dad and my mom. No, I'm watching you write it. No, it's very strange.
Starting point is 01:20:02 It's very strange. He's got his dolls back though, that's nice. Um, well then. And he figured out filters. He did figure out this virtual filter. But can I tell you one of the things that the curve ball I got from all this? What?
Starting point is 01:20:14 I'm not mad at Tom and Christina, but I've been up in Philly one, I have cancer. Oh, what is that? I'm hoping to cope. I don't mind the picture up, but I wish it was a better one. Well, you look great. I feel bad on how I've entered,
Starting point is 01:20:24 but doing a business and podcast on the sign up, but I wish it was a better one. Well, you look great. I feel bad on how I've entered, but doing a business and podcast on the sign Instagram, Facebook makes not one able to take tension. And I was like, oh, okay. Yeah. And then the next day, he wrote, now Tom Sagar is making fun of a man who wants to say, young, what's the problem, Tom? Somebody can't be young and look good.
Starting point is 01:20:46 You got it. That was Brian Johnson, the guy who does like the crazy treatments every day. Oh yeah, that guy's awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the millionaire. So anyway, it's like this crazy cycle. Well, I just want to say something, man. Robert, you know, you're still our number one.
Starting point is 01:21:04 Yeah, I do. We love you here. I had no idea, you're still our number one. I mean, we love you here. I had no idea that you're dealing with any health issues. You know, if we can be of any assistance, I would hope that you would ask us because we would like to assist you in any way. I thought the photo of you looks pretty bad ass actually. You look amazing. You're so handsome. Yeah. You look great. But look man, here's the thing, I can't say the only thing that really gets to me about this.
Starting point is 01:21:32 I don't like ham sandwiches. I... Mm. Really? I thought you tolerated. I'll have one if there's nothing, but I always go for turkey. I like turkey sandwich. And I like ham. I like the taste, the smokiness of the meat.
Starting point is 01:21:49 And I like turkey dry pussy. It doesn't sound as good to say Tom turkey sandwich. No. Ham sandwich rolls off the tongue better, but I just want them to know. I'm not a ham sandwich guy. I like turkey. I like chicken. You like mayonnaise, which is weird. I am a mayonnaise fan. And is mayonnaise cap or what? His mayonnaise cap. I don't think I can make a condiment cap now.
Starting point is 01:22:16 I'll try though. I will research. I'll do my research. Do you like mayo? No, not personally. Yeah, it's a very cultural thing. Okay. 4,000 island, you know, like ranch.
Starting point is 01:22:28 All these mails. But you don't like ranch either, right? Black people don't like ranch. Huh, what? Do you like people eat ranch? I forget. Ranch? Ranch is kind of creamy and mayo-y.
Starting point is 01:22:38 I mean, I can fuck with ranch. It depends, it depends on what's on. What's your favorite? If you have to take a dressing, what will you take? Oh, for a salad? Yeah, like if you eat salad. That's what. What's your favorite? If you have to take a dressing, what will you take? Oh, for a salad? Yeah, I'll eat salad. You're just a salad.
Starting point is 01:22:47 That's what. How does your health eating sense everything? Remember you were on such a crazy health kick? Is it all back to what you were before? Not all back. I'm getting some routines in. I definitely am not going anywhere near as hard as I was. I'm training because I was, I mean, that was brutal.
Starting point is 01:23:03 But yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm, But yeah, I got some more routines in for sure. I'm drinking nothing but water. Really? Yeah, yeah, no. That's so good. No soda, no, basically no alcohol, basically nothing but water. No alcohol.
Starting point is 01:23:14 Oh, pretty much. No, you're making alcohol guys. No, I think that's the thing. Yeah, it wasn't a big deal. That's my advice. I can't start, I drink two glasses of wine every night in summertime and I feel like a raging alcoholic. Yeah, you are kind of a booze bag.
Starting point is 01:23:27 RPC. It was so disgusting. We helped to. Yeah, Christine. Yeah, we helped to make up with you at some point. Yeah, we love you. I hope you will let us. It really makes me sad that he feels we don't love him
Starting point is 01:23:42 because we so much love and appreciation. Yeah, I love him so much. He's my original. I even like watching him come feels we don't love him because we so much love and appreciation. Yeah. I love him so much. He's my original, I even like watching him come. I don't mind it when he does those things and he's like, oh yeah, oh, I'm gonna come. I don't mind. Wow.
Starting point is 01:23:56 I know, it's like watching a friend say hello when he jizzes in front of me. All right, I will be in Las Vegas later this month. I will be at the Cosmopolitan, I believe. The Chelsea at the Cosmopolitan, I'm doing three shows. Wow, wow, wow. Yeah, wow, wow, wow. And I have some shows that I've announced.
Starting point is 01:24:17 I'm back out there, you know what I mean? I'm back out there doing my thing and stuff like that. If you wanna see it, you can see, let's see, yeah, there's some of the August 31st, September 1st and 2nd in Vegas. And I've been doing, I've been doing, I have Rafal's on November 9th. I've been doing a whole new hour of,
Starting point is 01:24:39 you know, I'm loose, I'm loose. I'm out there having fun figuring it out. I love the process. We wanna see me talk about HDog, some of the stuff that I'm thinking about these'm out there having fun figuring it out. I love the process. We want to see me talk about H-Dog, some of the stuff that I'm thinking about these days. H-Dog. Come to a show, I'm really enjoying it. All right.
Starting point is 01:24:52 And then Jean? I'm gonna, as an special announcement, New dates, Toronto, literally there's like 20 tickets left for the Bluma Apple Theater September, September, December, December, Jizz and Peg, Cala, Canada. You might want to. Win it, Willie Peg.
Starting point is 01:25:07 Win a Peg. Win a Peg. The Club Regent Event Center. Correct. You know what I mean? And then Comedy Vex, downtown Denver. The best. I know.
Starting point is 01:25:15 I don't mind if I'm yet me. Those shows are almost all sold out so get your tickets right now, right now. And then I added, short like titties, Puta, wise guys, October 13th, before Tuesday. Great club. You're not saying, you're not me. Know the hell we don't, you ain't say anything yet. short like titties Poo-Tah, wise guys October 13th or 14th. No, I'm saying, no, I mean, no, the hell we don't,
Starting point is 01:25:27 you ain't say anything yet. K. K. K. K. Say I'm saying, I'm proff, October 15th. You don't say it. The comedy club on state October 26th through 28th,
Starting point is 01:25:40 and Madison, Jizz, Carson. Another amazing club is coming. Have you done a couple of combos, say it? Like a million years ago. Another amazing club is coming. Have you done Comic-Con most ate? Like a million years ago. It's fantastic. Yeah. No, what you saying? Don't know, wait.
Starting point is 01:25:49 And then I added a night in Vegas, which will be announced pretty soon in October as well. Oh. Yeah, yeah. Christianipion also, buy my lipstick. If you haven't already, it is an incredible product. Yeah, just do it, try it out. I've perfected my shade of red
Starting point is 01:26:05 because I've been wearing red lipstick like a little hoover since I was 13. And there might be coming up maybe a new announcement in that world. Maybe in that world, we shall see. And that's it, I love you. Let's see what else, yeah. Oh yeah, what was the, oh yeah, you gotta tell this.
Starting point is 01:26:23 You guys know, which one one the top one there? Yo, can I push first? Okay, because I really want to tell the story like you mean it. I got a fucking squirt Can I tell you okay? I'm gonna share the story with you guys this happened to me over the summer And I'm proud. I'm proud and I'm not proud. Let me start by saying that okay So growing up my mother was severely, was mentally ill, we all know that. She was, you know, schizophrenic in the end of her life,
Starting point is 01:26:51 but she was very confrontational with people in public. Very confrontational. It cannot be stated that some people are reluctant for confrontation. And some people really embrace it. And your mother definitely embraced confrontations. Like to the point, and it was really embrace it. And your mother definitely embraced confidence. Like, to the point, and it was always usually directed at weight staff, she was convinced,
Starting point is 01:27:10 like, one time we went to a Japanese restaurant, and she was convinced that the hostess sat us near the toilets because we were white, and then called the lady racial gentleman of other kinds, that racial slur, which doesn't even, it's not even the right slur for Japanese people, you know what I mean? The point is, my mother would start shit with people in public and my whole life, I was ashamed about it
Starting point is 01:27:37 and I became very non-confrontational with people in public because of that reason. Like, I'm always very understanding and I don't like, I don't do a lot of road rage. You don't see that with me. Like, I don't do it, okay. Now, this summer, you were in LA, and I couldn't, I had to take your car
Starting point is 01:27:55 because my car was unavailable. I had a car of mine in Los Angeles. That's part of this story. The whole reason, it's a long story, but it was in Los Angeles temporarily. And on this particular day, you're gonna take it from here, but on this particular day, I...
Starting point is 01:28:10 I was freaking wet in my car. Yeah, I don't know, and I don't know where I was, but you go, hey, can I take your car? And I go, yeah. And you go, because you're like, just a people don't, Christina's not into the cars that I like. She's not ever been like, I don't care.
Starting point is 01:28:27 You don't care. But you've also never driven. That's true. This car, it is a Porsche 911. It's a GT3 Touring. And it has. Which means nothing to me that's Chinese. But it is tuned up.
Starting point is 01:28:46 It has a Demon 4.5 liter engine. It's tuned up to 650 horsepower. So it fucking rips and yeah. And you tell me you're gonna take it. And I'm like, it's GT3 touring, knowing. So anyway, you tell me and I'm like, it's GT3 touring, knowing. So, anyway, you tell me and I'm like, yeah, have fun. And by the way, within 10 minutes,
Starting point is 01:29:13 just before you get to your store, within 10 minutes, you call me and you're like, dude, this thing is fucking amazing. Yeah, I was like, dude, this fucking rips, dude, cause I took it through a canyon and I was like, fuck, this is what I'm talking about. Like, I felt like I was one with the car. Does that make sense?
Starting point is 01:29:28 I know why. I was like, this is fucking a lot, dude. I went to do my gig in Denver. Oh yeah, and I, so you go, I'm in Denver and you're like, can I take your car? Yes. Yeah. Then, I'm like, okay, and by the way, I didn't sleep well.
Starting point is 01:29:42 I had to get up early for this flight. I fly to Denver just to do one show at the club one night. And when I'm so tired, I go to take a nap. When I wake up from this nap, I pick up my phone and you have texted me, oh my God. Don't. I got into a fight. Okay.
Starting point is 01:30:01 And I'm like, what? All right, listen, so let me back it up to you. Just to preface how mortified I am of public fighting, when my stepdad and my mom guys together, my stepdad was a sociopathic criminal, who I really liked actually. He was a fun guy. A lot of times they're very charming.
Starting point is 01:30:14 He's so charming. They would start fights with people anywhere. I'm talking like the grocery store parking lot. To give us an example. Okay, one time we were standing in line at a grocery store and somebody's kid was crying like a three-year-old and my stepdad goes to the parent. Why didn't I tell that kid to shut the fuck up? And the person was like, what did you say to me? And then the dad of the kid was like, what the what are you talking about? My
Starting point is 01:30:39 kid's three years old and he's like, yeah, my stepdad was like, you want to fucking fight me or something? And then they take it out to the parking lot and they have a fucking fist fight. That's the level of shit that I grew up with. Another time in a movie theater, my stepdad told somebody to shut up because they were making too much loud and the same thing, like, you want to go
Starting point is 01:30:56 fucking fight me? Yeah. Like, I just grew up in a lot of confrontation. My mom loved it. I think that's what made my mom attracted to my stepdad because she inherently was very combative, which I know is how you say that word now combative and you loved it. She loved it She loved starting fights with strangers. You were like I don't want to I don't want fucking any part of this shit Okay, so anyway, I'm driving Tommy's fancy Porsche and I'm loving it. I'm having the best day
Starting point is 01:31:19 I didn't realize cars could be fun and I'm just like I, I'm having like a fucking so-cal day, right? Like I'm in a good vibe. I'm gonna stop at my grocery store. I'm gonna fucking hit up the salabar. That's my favorite. Like I'm vibing and I'm Rob Eiler and I are texting, I think. And he sends me something funny and I pull into the parking spot of the grocery store
Starting point is 01:31:40 and I text Rob back. You know responsibly, I'm gonna put it in park and I'm just like idling, texting back, LOL. I put the phone down, I turn off the car, I open the car door, and there's this old man standing there, like fucking right there, right? And I was like, that's weird, and I go, hey, hey man, you know, like, and he goes finally. And I was like, I'm what? And he goes, finally, finally, it turned the damn car off. You were idling for like 15 minutes.
Starting point is 01:32:15 And I go, what? Like at first I start laughing because I can't believe that somebody would pick that bone with me. Like I start, I go, wait, what is this? So to give this, to make like real clear, he gets close to where you are. He moves.
Starting point is 01:32:30 He walks up to you. He walks up to you. He's standing as I'm getting out of the car. And he's saying, and I stand up there. God, how long are you gonna leave this car running for? Correct. And I, and I said first, I'm in dismally.
Starting point is 01:32:39 You think it's like a joke? Yeah, and I think he's like a fan or whatever. And I was like, what dude and he goes I'm sitting here trying to have my lunch and your car is so loud We can enjoy our lunch now keep in mind This man is not eating in a restaurant No, this is a grocery store in LA that has a patio area. So if you are a fat fucking pig and you can't wait to get to your house or eat in your car like a civilized person, you fucking eat in the parking lot like an animal.
Starting point is 01:33:13 And that's what this guy did. Okay, it's fucking hot. It's like you don't do it unless you're desperate to eat. In my opinion, that's the only time I've ever done. So he's, so I asked for clarification. I go, wait, what do you do? And he goes, you are idling for so long, and it was so loud, we can enjoy our lunch.
Starting point is 01:33:31 And I go, and I start to snap in, like something fucking, I start to stop being, I stopped taking the high road in my head, right? I'm like, oh, this guy is out of his fucking mind. Like you're coming at me, bro. And I start to go, like you like, you're actually mad at me because I idle too long, and then I start to defend myself.
Starting point is 01:33:48 And I go, I sent a fucking text message to my friend, and that was it. It was like maybe a two minute idle, sir. And he's like, well, I took forever. It took so long, and your car is so loud. And he repeated himself, I'm trying to eat my lunch. Right, it should be pointed out, if it's not clear, that your car is outside.
Starting point is 01:34:10 And a parking lot. And in a parking lot. In a parking lot where you put cars, and he's deciding to have lunch outside where cars make noise. Cars live outside. Yeah, you fuck. And then all of a sudden, my crazy mom brain,
Starting point is 01:34:24 not not meaning mom brain, not, not meaning mom brain, my mother, I fucking channel her. It's something came over me and genetics, biologics took over. And Tom, I've never said the right thing. I've never had a good public fight, but today was my day. So he keeps saying it, he goes, he goes, all right, I was trying to have my launcher in your car wars too loud.
Starting point is 01:34:46 And then you know what I said? I go, yeah, well, I hope it's your last lunch. You old piece of shit. And I was like, oh my god, and I was so proud of myself. Like, you know, when you're vibrating, because you're like, I did it. I stood up for myself. I fucking stood up for myself.
Starting point is 01:35:02 I did it. And I was so happy with myself. And then he's like, whoa, yeah, and he keeps yelling at me. And then I stood up for myself. I fucking stood up for myself, I did it! And I was so happy with myself. And then he's like, whoa, yeah, he keeps yelling at me. And then I just start, I walk away. I'm like, I hope it's your last lunch. I hope you fucking die. And I walk away. And I'm so shaking and vibrating.
Starting point is 01:35:15 And you think when you tell me this, by the way, because you tell me this story when you're inside. So I get inside, yeah, I'm alone. But hold on, so, so, hold on. So I'm fucking talking to myself. I'm muttering to myself because I'm so keyed up that I got, I got a zinger in number one. And I'm having a confrontation with some fucking weird guy in a parking lot. So I'm, I'm all like, and I'm muttering. I'm like, mother fucker, fuck you, you fucking, you're fucking too loud. Like I'm talking to myself.
Starting point is 01:35:38 And this woman fucking sees me talking to myself and, and I go, I'm sorry, I'm talking to myself. I just fall a little man in a parking lot. And she goes, that's okay, I talked to myself too. And I was like, okay, thank God, I'm not. And you know where you're afraid that everyone's watching you and everyone's seen it and I'm in the shame spiral? So that's when I call you. You call me.
Starting point is 01:35:56 In the fucking grocery store. And here's this thing. Oh my God. I can sense your shame because you go, God, you tell me the story and I was like, quiet for a second, you're like, are you embarrassed by me, are you mad at me? And I'm like, I hate this kind of stuff.
Starting point is 01:36:09 I go, dude, this is great. Like, this is the best story I've ever heard. And you go, really? I go, yeah, that's awesome. I'm so proud of you. I'm so happy that you said that. You said, I love you more. Yeah, yeah, I did.
Starting point is 01:36:21 I took a while. I thought it was really great. And then, I think I go to the gym and I in the hotel and when I get back, my phone goes, I have a follow-up second story with the guy and I'm like, what? Yeah, so it gets even crazier. So I'm now walking through the grocery store. So it gets even crazier. So I'm now walking through the grocery store. I get my items. I'm talking myself down because I'm very amped up.
Starting point is 01:36:49 And I go to the checkout and I'm like, okay, what do I, okay, this is done. Just fucking put it past you. Like you were having a rad day. Just go back, go back, just fucking check it off like Taylor Swift, right? And I fucking look outside and he's still there. He's still eating lunch in the goddamn parking lot.
Starting point is 01:37:11 Yeah. And I was like, fuck, now I have to re-confront this man because my car is still parked. He's still sitting there. I have to have another fucking confrontation with this man. So at this point, I'm thinking like, I got to show Tom this guy. So I snap a picture of him.
Starting point is 01:37:26 And I also, there he is. This goblin looking piece of shit. Look, it's not even a fucking window. That's a piece of tarp plastic that they put. So animals like him can eat in the parking lot without dust blowing up. Show the other picture of this animal, this demon goblin.
Starting point is 01:37:47 Yeah, you're empty too loud. So I'm like, shit, I have to see this guy again. So then I say to myself, I says to Christine, you're gonna walk to the car with your head up high, right? And I talked to myself, you're gonna walk your, fuck this guy, if he comes up to you again. You know, I'm still a woman and this is a man. He can fucking kill me. I mean, he's old myself, you're gonna walk your fuck this guy. If he comes up to you again, you know, I'm still a woman. And this is a man.
Starting point is 01:38:06 He can fucking kill me. I mean, he's old as shit and he's gonna die, but like he can still harm me. So I'm like, just walk up, act like nothing's happening. You're proud of yourself. You didn't do anything wrong. You stood up for yourself. You get in the car and you get out of here. So I walk proudly to our car.
Starting point is 01:38:21 I open the door. I start the engine. And you know what? I said to myself, I says the engine. And you know what? I said to myself, I said self. Fuck this guy. Fuck him, you are your mother's daughter. You're gonna give it a little fucking extra sauce before you leave the park.
Starting point is 01:38:37 And it was like, again, I channeled Edith. She was in me and she was like, she was whispering me and she's like, here's what you have to do. The crazy whisperer, she goes, rev the engine five times. Let him know who you're fucking are. Because I got Texas plates on that shit too, right? So I was like, I start the car,
Starting point is 01:38:56 and it is loud. It is loud. Let's get the engine started. There's an after-mari kit exhaust on it, it's pretty fun to laugh. This thing is like a gen engine. It's like, buh buh buh buh buh buh. Like the idle is loud, buh buh buh buh buh. And then I do it five times.
Starting point is 01:39:10 Real, real, real, real. I really get him fired up. And I see him fucking stand. Now he's really pissed off. He's standing. And I'm backing out. And I was like, okay, Christina, just back out. Don't hit anybody.
Starting point is 01:39:23 Don't fuck yourself now, bitch. Like you're almost out. So I back out successfully. I'm like, okay, Christina, just back out. Don't hit anybody. Don't fuck yourself now, bitch. Like you're almost out. So I back out successfully. I'm like, I'm shaking, cause I'm so stoked to fuck with him again. And then I'm pulling up and I'm like shaking. And he's yelling at me again. And he goes, finally, finally, you're getting out of here.
Starting point is 01:39:38 And I roll my window down. And I go, oh, sir, you forgot this. And I flip him, fucking bird. Yeah. And then I drive off. And I was so proud of myself. Yeah, thanks, guys. Thanks.
Starting point is 01:39:50 I've never done that. I've never, I can't say what I'm really proud of is like, I never get moments like that. Like, you know, when you fight with somebody and you're like, oh, I should have fucking, I should have fucking. The fact that I was like, though my mother's angel, like an angel was on my shoulder guiding me. A confrontational angel.
Starting point is 01:40:06 Yeah. Yeah. And you were right about something else that you said, which was that he wouldn't have said that to a guy. Right. No. He saw a woman get out of the car and he was like, I'll put her in her place, you know. There's a lot of guys that will confront women that won't confront men, you know.
Starting point is 01:40:22 Gender equality is cap. Yeah. Because I agree. I think he you know. Gender equality is cap. Yeah. Because I agree. I think he did see like a little blonde. Yeah, he saw you get out and he was like, I'm gonna fuck with her. Yeah. He came up to me bro.
Starting point is 01:40:31 Yeah, yeah, yeah. If he saw a big dude get out of the car, he wouldn't have been like, Hey, what's up to Idleing, you know. To you, you could crush him. Well, he's a old man. This fucking disgusting, nebush goblin. Yeah, I would have.
Starting point is 01:40:44 He's a shit fuck face. I Yeah, I would have seen that though. He's a shit fuck face. I would have loved to have seen that though. Him coming to you? I would have loved him to say that to you. I might have lost my shit if I saw him say it. Would you, you would have, I could have been bad. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:40:56 I could have been bad. Break his fucking. Yeah, I probably would have said some... Some meaner stuff? Not cool stuff. What would you say? I don't know. I don't want to think about it actually. I probably would say a lot meaner stuff if I stuff. I don't know. I don't want to think about it actually
Starting point is 01:41:09 I probably would say a lot meaner stuff if I saw him saying something to you Then if I saw him saying it if he said it to me, you know, I mean look I get it in the world like He's just looking to Dispense old guy the eat at the grocery store, you know, and it's a good grocery store by the way He can afford a better Whatever do you mean the main thing about this is like cars are allowed to make noise outside. In parking lots, bro. Yeah, if it was like I'm eating in a restaurant
Starting point is 01:41:33 and you pulled your car into the restaurant, that's a fucking crazy thing to do. Yeah, complain like you're in a parking lot. Look, you can see the cars there. Yeah, of course. Through this tarp. You're allowed to do whatever you want with that. Yeah, but anyway, I'm just super pumped that like,
Starting point is 01:41:48 I finally got a zinger in and never happens to me. I'm always like, you're the one, you should. And then you think about it later. I hope that your last lunch is a great one. Thanks, man. Thanks, babe. And I'm proud that you still love me because I was like afraid.
Starting point is 01:42:01 Yeah, you were right. Oh my God, he's gonna think I'm, I'm always so afraid that you'll think I'm crazy like my mom or something. No, no. You just let me more and that's really afraid. Yeah, you were afraid. Oh my God, he's going to think I'm always so afraid that you'll think I'm crazy like my mom or something. No, no. You just let me more. And that's really cool. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:42:09 When you say mean things to people, it always makes me happy. That's our special bond. All right. Thanks, babe. We got to wrap it up. Tom, you're the best. Love you too. And thank you guys for watching.
Starting point is 01:42:19 Thank you for listening. And we'll see you next week. Mike, mommy. Please, if you're below the age of 18, get up and start the day. Come on, come on, with the feet on the ground, get you a nice hot breakfast. Very lovely, take that cover and put it in shower. Take that cover and put off yourself. Take that cover and put it in shower. Get up and, start today
Starting point is 01:43:05 Hands above 18 Hands above 18 Hands above 18 Please if you're below the age of 18 Don't do this challenge I trust you guys, why? Become 18, you can You can do anything on the front
Starting point is 01:43:29 on the back you know the king like so no problem can get me a dance 18 18 18 18 3 The fear below the age of 18 What we can do is have fun with this Take an old white t-shirt King on the front King on the back The King loves you
Starting point is 01:44:02 The King loves you The King loves you, the King loves you, the King loves you, the King loves you, and do a video. Very lovely, have fun with it. Let's make some videos. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you.
Starting point is 01:44:19 I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see you. I want to see 18, enjoy. I love you all. Let's make some videos. I want to see them.
Starting point is 01:44:31 I want to laugh. King. King. On the front. King. On the back. King. On the front.
Starting point is 01:44:42 King. On the back you

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