Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Tom Green Wants Garth Brooks Closure | Your Mom's House Ep. 797

Episode Date: February 12, 2025

Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour SPONSORS: Go to http://helixsleep.com/YMH for 20% Off Sitewide + 2 Free Dream Pillows with Mattress Purchase. Try VIIA Hemp! https://viia.co/YMH and use code YMH! Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at https://bluechew.com! Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. It’s another episode of YMH with Tom Segura and Christina P! This week, Mama and Papa Jeans open the show with a clip of a cool guy who wants to go fishing with Hitler, before diving into some clips of another talented artist who whistles. They next check out some back shot advertisements from Tony Johns and Christina makes a proposition to Tom about her ideal man. Fresh off the farm, Tom Green enters the mommy dome to share what he's been up to lately and to discuss not one, but two different projects about his life floating around in the streaming world. They also talk about his classic Subway pranks, an appearance by Joe Rogan on Tom Green's show back in the day, and watch clips of fan submitted happy birthday drive-thru pranks. Tom Green also experiences some horrible or hilarious clips and Christina's TikToks, and invites the mommies to speculate on Garth Brooks. Your Mom’s House Ep. 797 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:30 - Opening Clip: Fishing With Hitler 00:07:26 - Clip: Dana White Addresses The Dummy 00:15:02 - The World's Greatest Whistler 00:21:28 - Clip: Tony Johns Advertising Backshots 00:23:13 - Clip: No Soy Boys 00:23:49 - This Is The Type Of Guy You're Gettin' 00:29:26 - This Is The Tom Green Segment 00:36:55 - Happy Birthday Drive-Thru Pranks 00:44:40 - Clip: Tom Green's Subway Order 00:50:24 - Clip: Karen Getting Arrested 00:52:54 - TikToks 00:57:59 - A Normal Life 01:11:23 - Clip: A Barrel Roll 01:14:20 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:17:31 - Garth Brooks 01:22:34 - Closing Song - "Moose Soup Remix" by Matt Mercer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Battle Creek, Michigan. Tickets are on sale now for my show at Firekeepers Casino on Friday, May 9th. Next month, I'm coming across the pond to Dublin, Belfast, Manchester, London, Glasgow, Nottingham, and Cardiff. Tickets and info are at tomscuro.com slash tour. Welcome, welcome to your mom's house.

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Hello. What's everybody? It's another show. We're here, we're excited. We have an incredible guest today. We got a lot of cool things to show you. So many. What's everybody? It's Charles. Okay. That's so good. Let's play some more of that. You like that? Yeah.

Yeah, it's pretty great. Here we go. Here. Nigga my nice. Nope. I don't know about that one. Okay. Annie.

Annie. Hello, Carla. It's a great day. It's really good. She was in rare form. She was in so much, so much, so much going on. I might be retarded, but I'm not stupid. I might be retarded, but I'm not stupid.

That's very true. How are you feeling, Tom? How's your period? I might be retarded, but I'm not stupid. I might be retarded, but I'm not stupid. That's very true. How are you feeling, Tom? How's your period? It's good. Well, it's coming on. I can feel it. Tell me, what are your symptoms? Just like some hot flashes.

You know, I'm starting to cramp. And I can just feel, I just want it to start so bad. The anxiety of it before it comes is the worst, huh? It's the worst. I can't wait for menopause. Yeah. What period?

Are you using an app to track your cycle? Yeah. Yeah. What's the app? Keep Bleeding. Yeah. Yeah. What do you use?

Period Tracker. Oh, yeah. That's what everybody used to use. You know, I don't know if this is true for you, but if I saw this on TikTok, Maddie Gates, I don't know if you know this, but she told her boyfriend, does this happen to you when you eat spicy food? It makes your period spicy. Yes, that's so crazy. Wow.

Yeah, yeah. Wow. What about you? Where are you with your period? Oh my God, it's just like waiting for it to happen is the worst. Same, I think we're cycled up again. Oh we are, yeah.

It's gonna be such a rough week. Many can have periods, a lot of people don't know that. Not anymore, not in Trump's America. I think we're done. I don't think I'm gonna stop bleeding because there's somebody else in the White House. That's a good point. Guys, here's a great segue.

Buy my Perfect Four lipstick. I'm wearing Berlin today because I'm feeling saucy. My period is spicy You can get that at christina p.com. I have four colors. I say just buy them all You know what i'm saying, especially if you're a guy you need to give for your lady for vd. It's your birthday It's your birthday. Yeah, i'm gonna have some exciting images coming up soon on christina p.com Yeah, do it. You know, it's my life. So, yeah, that was cool.

Having her here was cool, man. How are you feeling? Pretty good, I had a pretty, well, a period dump, you know? So worse. Yeah. It was like runny. Yeah, just, you know? Oh, so worse. Yeah. It was like runny. Yeah, just, you know, fucking hormones, man. But yeah, other than that, I feel pretty good.

Good. Yeah, pretty good. It's exciting. I'm excited. Why don't we introduce this show? Yeah, yeah, okay, I forgot. We haven't even done that. Yeah, here we go.

Hitler, hell and the Nazis. I really don't think that he was because I honestly think that Hitler was a good guy based upon my own research, the by kicking the greedy Jews out that were destroying his country and turning them all in the gaze Meow meow Meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow, meow. Uh-oh. Meow, meow, meow, meow. I honestly think that Hitler was a good guy. That was Bryce Mitchell on episode one of his podcast, our, our insanity with Bryce Mitchell and really Delgado.

I think the best part of this whole thing is watching the other guy. The whole time be like, what did I just get into? This is our first episode. What is this guy talking about? Hey, he got us involved. Yeah, here's the rest of it. They were ganging out the kids. They were queering out the women.

They were queering out the dudes. Look at that guy's face. You know what our first tranny surgery ever was? Happened to be in Germany before Hitler took over. You know the books that everybody makes fun of Hitler burning? You know what the books was? Queer books. Hitler burned queer books

because Hitler didn't want a bunch of queers destroying his nation. They can't produce children. But what about? What's he gonna say? He's a UFC fighter and this is, there was a huge fallout from this. And then I guess he has since then, what, apologized?

Yeah, yeah, he came out. Because Dana ripped his ass in a press conference. He goes, Dana started his press conference going, he goes, you know I've been around a lot of dumb fucking people. It's a great intro. This is the dumbest fucking person that we've ever encountered. So scroll up a little bit, actually.

Oh, I'm sorry. I sounded insensitive. I definitely was not trying to offend anybody. Of course not. But I know I did. I know that a lot of people died in the Holocaust. That's a fact. Hitler did a lot of evil things. I think we can all agree on that. I'm definitely not a Nazi.

Definitely do not control any of the evil things that he did. I'm talking about the cool shit he did. A lot of people are ignoring the cool shit. What I'm trying to say is, everybody only talks about the bad stuff. What about the good stuff? Yeah, man, the good stuff. You're just trying to tell them the good stuff.

Hitler burned queer books. Ha ha ha ha. Now, the real question is, what's episode two going to be like? I don't know if there will be a second episode. Because your second episode would have to be all about your first episode. I don't know. Before Hitler got on meth, he was a guy to go fishing with.

You think meth really turned Hitler bad? That also might be, you know, sometimes you hear sentences, that might be the first time that sentence was ever spoken. Like ever in the history of humanity guy before Hitler was on meth. That's a guy I'd go fishing with. Oh, yeah Here's this was great And I'm sure you guys heard what Bryce Mitchell said if you haven't said some probably I've heard a lot of dumb ignorant shit in my day But this one's probably the worst

We talk about Hitler, he's responsible for the death of six million Jews and he tried to completely eliminate a race of people. World War II was the deadliest war in history. 15 million military deaths, 45 million civilians, and 25 million soldiers were killed in World War II. Second of all, Hitler is one of the most disgusting and evil human beings to ever walk the face of the earth, and anyone that even tries to take an opposing position is a moron. That's the problem with the internet and social media. You provide a platform for a lot of dumb ignorant people. We've obviously reached out to Bryce

and when we read what he said and let him know how we feel about it I don't am we're beyond disgusted He then went on to say it was great though because he was like he's like, you know Yeah, he can say it because you can say what you want Yeah, he goes but what's great is that you know He will be in the octagon and then everybody can just cheer for him to get the shit kicked out of him. Yeah, that's true. I was like, yeah. Yeah, everybody has alternate research now.

They're like, you know, I know that's what we all learn, but... I did my own research. What kind of research? Not the indoctrinated bullshit they feed you about Hitler being a knucklehead. Because he wasn't. Everyone's got their alternate stuff. It's pretty cool. People always saying this guy was up to no good. I found out he was burning queer books and that's cool.

Yep. Yep. Yes. Unreal. Gaying out the kids. Gaying out the kids. They're always worried about gaying out the kids. Yep. This is the biggest concern.

Queering out the women. They were queering out the dudes. I don't know, they're always so worried that the homosexuality is contagious. I don't think you just catch it. People are really, yeah. They get really uptight about that. People who wear camo really fear it the most.

Yeah, yeah. They're all like, the fuck, I'm gonna catch this bullshit from you. Don't come around here. The other thing that all like, like hillbillies think too is that any gay man wants to fuck them. Them. Yeah, them in particular. Like 330 pounds just like fucking gut hanging out, face looks like fucking god shit growing, like mold and shit growing on there. Like I don't want no fucking gay guy trying to fuck me.

Like no one's trying to fuck you, man. Nobody. Gay guys, straight guys, straight women, gay women. No one wants to fuck you. Nobody wants to fuck you. Nobody. Come around here, see me naked and try to fuck me. I don't think so.

I know, they're so afraid. What do you think's going on? Oh no. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace, the ultimate platform for entrepreneurs who want to thrive online. Whether you're starting out or growing a brand, Squarespace has everything you need.

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That's helixsleep.com slash YMH for 20% off site-wide plus two free dream pillows with your mattress purchase helixsleep.com slash YMH it is our kinsanity. That's a good name. That is good. Yes. I do hope he keeps it up I do too. I mean shit. I'm excited. Is he gonna keep it up? They already announced that they're Canceling because that would be a shame. I don't want them to keep going dude another episode already. Yeah, that'd be fucking rad Yeah, Bryce. Don't don't let Dana White scare you. You got a voice Please yeah, let's just see. I mean, maybe type in the, yeah.

Okay. He's probably got some views on episode one. Right? Only one episode. Oh, that's too bad. Threw in the towel, huh? You gotta keep going, bud. Gotta get it going, bud.

Oh, man. Well. Yeah, what can you do? What can you do, what can you do? What can you do? What can you do? So? Yeah, there's um, there's some stuff. I want to show you. Mm-hmm. Where did I looking for this? very awesome Person I don't wanna I don't wanna, I don't wanna, oh yeah, look. This is enough. This is enough.

This is enough. Oof. Oof. I just moved into my apartment today. I heard construction about me all day, but I'm not a go like it was nothing because I never wanna believe that they would come here and do this and then they've been attacking me. It's non-stop. Don't tell me you're the house. Do this to me.

What is happening? She's a paranoid schizophrenic. Oh they've been attacking her all day. The construction on top. Oh god I got it. But the snot thing I thought was really cool. Yeah, I like that And it's cool to upload right after you have it. You can go like should I? Not her she just goes right in. Yeah, that was really nice. Thank you. Yeah, I thought she got maced Oh, her eyes are all red and no makes your nose run Her eyes are all red and no make sure nose run no Also have you ever seen this skill before there's so many like talented people out there And you just they that's the cool thing I mean Dana was saying the bad thing about the internet social media

The good thing is that you discover talents. Let's see Oh wow. Oh wow. Right? How's he doing that? I guess he's a professional throat whistler? Oh wow. Look at that captivated audience. Oh.

Look at that kid. Kid loves it. And he's feeling. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness Wow, that kid's trying to whistle He was like, yeah, they're everybody's like, how is he doing? Yeah, we don't know how he's doing it Here's the thing. That's 1984. Yeah, right. That's 40 years ago. Mm-hmm. Guess what what he's still doing it. No

Yeah, he's still doing it. No. Yeah. He's still doing it. Wow. I bet his talent got even better. Wow. Unbelievable. Oh, he's doing YMCA. That's cool.

Yeah. Unbelievable. Oh, he's doing YMCA. That's cool Yeah That's Ralph whistle on Instagram beautiful And I've lost myself on his page before oh my bad like hours. I bet wait a minute. Yes I'm confused. Are we not gonna are we not gonna talk about how we know this guy? You don't remember this guy? No No way this guy like pissed you off before remember like he did in the LA studio Yeah, how we saw this guy a long time ago. He was like, you know what? That was the oldest that was LA Snobby us we appreciate talent. Yeah, what is wrong? Here's the thing? I don't even want to revisit that whatever Yeah, that sounds like a dark time for Tom and I. We would never discourage talent.

Also, that was before I became a Texan. Yeah, I like this guy's attitude. He's pro-America. Yeah. What is wrong with you? I'm super, I mean, I'm, first of all, I feel like you're not telling the truth. And secondly.

Annie. Lies. Sorry about that. I must have been mistaken. What is wrong with you? Jesus Christ, this guy. Ralph Gies, is that how you say it? Can you try to do it? Can you do it? I can do the face. Have better sex than you have in the past.

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Please support our show and tell them we sent you. This month of love, elevate your love life with VIA. I like how he. Yeah, he makes his mouth move and it makes the sounds go up and down. I don't know, I like it. I love it. I think it's very cool, I think it's very cool. Mm-hmm I like how many different songs does he have there on that Instagram? Oh my god. Let's hear it Happy Thursday everyone. Oh shit

Yeah, yeah yeah yes you are whistler I am yeah I am whistler whoa Is he kidding me? It's unbelievable. Wow. Thank you. That's great. Thank you. You know, I see that he's smoking cigarettes. I don't want him to damage his instrument there.

Well, I think it's probably at this point he knows. Yeah, how to do that. He's been cultivating this talent for 40 years. For so long. Yeah. It's really incredible. You know, that's amazing. That's quite a talent. It's very exciting when a man has a special talent. It makes

me excited. Yes. Another update you're not going to believe. Guess who is back at it. I've been blowing out max since 96, but you know, if you're a single female and you're local, hit my line, baby. Yes. Wait a minute. Shit. The ladies man, he's back. I guess he broke up with his girlfriend.

He broke up, he's in a public restroom. He is letting you know that he is back on the scene. He's doing like Tony's John's, the moon kind of shit. Blowing out back since 96. I've been blowing out back since 96. Woo! Giving out the phone number publicly. We out here.

Yeah. Can I just say, I like that Tony was in a relationship, but I like Tony John single even more. Single Tony is kind of the most fun song. It's who he is. This is when he shines. Here's the only concern that I have personally, because I am a Tony fan and I wanna see Tony succeed.

I don't know that that's just orange juice. I know. I'm thinking that he's not just a citrus fan. I know, I thought the same thing. And I fucking hope it is not a screwdriver in a carry case. I hope it's not a leader of a fucking screwdriver. Because that's what they do. I've seen people do that.

I know, I know. I'm not, listen, let's give Tony the benefit of the doubt. Benefit of the doubt, we need you sober and slinging dick out there. That's right. But we don't want you inebriated. No, and keep working, Tony. Keep getting a job.

Because I think the job is what keeps him in line and on track. It's true. I don't like him unemployed. Different men. Idle hands. Different men attract women in different ways, you know? That's so true.

There's certain guys that like, I don't know, some guys do this bullshit. I don't like that. Your man doesn't have a lean, energetic, strong physique. I don't know some guys do this bullshit I don't like Your man doesn't have a lean energetic strong physique. I don't like it gets you off the pill and toxic cosmetics Build a purpose-driven business and lead protect him like he's one of those not for me, but he this it's still an angle It's just an angle. It's a way to get laid certain chicks are going to see that be like I like him I know but it's too aggressive. I personally, I mean, you've known this about me.

I like the weirdos. I like a dark night. I like, I'm into, you know, the vampires. I like Peter Murphy. I like Robert Smith. I like this. I like Depeche Mode. I like Dave Gohan.

I like these. You really do like that. Out of shape, a little weird, I'm okay. There's something about the dark. See? I love the darkness. Look, I love you because I do think that deep down inside you are a serial killer, and I think that's why

I'm very into you, I'm drawn to your darkness. But I'm just saying, look, remember when I was your fantasy Tina, and I dressed up a long, I did it like three times for you. It took hours to put prosthetic boobs and lips, hours. All I'm saying is I did that for you. Do you think you could do that for me? Dress up like Tina?

No, like dress up like Robert Smith or, you know, Peter Murphy or Dave Gohan. One of your goth heroes? Just once. You've never worn black eyeliner. You've never put on any of my lipsticks and I have every shade for every skin tone. You didn't even try red.

Look, Hitler, what he did was he got rid of the queers. They're not queer, they're all married to women. I'm just saying. I know, it's so weird that that, see that's the thing though, that's a different angle. So like, one of those guys could totally seduce you. They did. You know how many weirdos?

Yeah, that's how they got in, but that's okay. You know what though? It, can I just, can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, sure. The point of the story is this is what attracted me primarily, like my young Christina loves the dark. Even, even when I was just listening to me. Yeah.

I mean, I'm talking 1984, I'm watching MTV. I'm not into, you know, the metal guys. I'm into David Bowie. I saw him in the video for Blue Gene. Put, bring up David Bowie, Blue Gene. And instantly I knew this is the kind of guy I like. I like the British weirdos. I like guys in eyeliner.

I like pale faces and, and, and cheek cheekbones and cigarettes and out of shape is okay. This something inside of me was like, that's the one. He's just thin, he's real thin. Real gaunt, I like the A, Z sort of sick. I'm the opposite. But that's what I'm saying. So then later on I matured, I got mature and can I tell you something? Real talk? Yeah.

I met you and because you're an actual alpha male, something primal too, switched on in me and I was like, this is the guy. I finally found a real man. Cause this is a different lane. Yeah. These are effeminate males. Totally. But your masculinity, I was all in. Your smell, I just, like I still, I'm very attracted to you.

Good. But maybe we could merge Bowie with Tom. Okay. Robert Smith. We will have to. Will you do it? No. Please.

But we'll talk about it. Just once. Oh, there he is. I still love him. I think he looks great. Look at that. I love it. I think he looks great. Look at that. I love it. I think he looks great.

Yeah, of course. It's Robert Smith, babe. Okay. Oh, he's so cute. And I like that he's stuck to it. He's still wearing the black eyeshadow. He's got the lipstick. His hair looks great.

Yeah, he looks good. You definitely got it there. He looks good. I would take 10 Robert Smiths over like one that fit guy that we just saw. Yeah. I'm not into the fit guy. No, this, this is not very exciting. This aesthetic is exciting. Always. Until the day I die. But do you think it's cause you know, Robert Smith and his talent, when you see this image? No, this is, this is the look. No.

My sexuality was formed watching like 80s alt boys. Do you know what I'm saying? Like that nine year old Christina in 1984, watching David Bowie, that was my sexual beginning. The clash watching, you know, Joe Strummer, these weirdos, I like weirdos. Yeah, you do. You've always liked weirdos.

Cause you also liked that, what was that actor that you always liked? So many know the fucking guy dark hair Buffalo 66 guy. Oh, yeah. Yeah, what's his name? I forget. Oh, he's so funny. I like that weirdo stuff. Yeah Vincent Gally That dude for real looks like Like Charles Manson. I know I love it. I love crazy now put some black eyeliner and red lipstick

And now we're is that a still from a movie or just life the with the denim the dark denim on looks great I mean, is that just like him out there? Just in the room. You're like, hey he's an interesting guy. I just love it. Really? You know there's mystery there. I'll tell you why because the average guy...

I want you to die. What does he say? Oh in the police... Okay. The average guy... Oh he plays the golden snake killer. Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, yeah.

The average guy, the average male is not very emotionally intelligent, right? These guys pretend to be a little more emotionally available to women and that's why. So I think that's why teenage me was like, oh, he gets me. Robert Smith, if I met him, I would just have to meet him and he would fall in love with me. We've talked about this before. And then we would talk about our feelings and he would get that I'm a depressed teenager. Like that's the- And he'd be like, I'm depressed too. Yeah. Yeah.

And then we'd fuck. And we are back and we are thrilled to bring back one of our favorite guests of all time, the great Tom Green, everybody. Oh, wow. This is amazing. You know, most people are content to have one new project. Why three? Well.

Is it greed? Is it just being greedy? Sounds very greedy. Sure. I need a documentary, I need a series, I need a special. I mean, how much did you fleece Amazon for in this negotiation? You know, it wasn't too bad, wasn't too bad.

Nice, nice. But no, it was cool. It started out with a documentary about the, sort of the history of my show and stuff like that. And they all kind of tie together. They all tie together. There's a stand-up special which kind of talks about my new adventures on my farm in Canada.

It's so great. I just saw the trailer, I saw the trailer for this. And it looks fascinating that like you really Decided to you were an LA guy obviously Well known as an entertainer and comedian and then you're like I'm out of here and I'm gonna go to I'm gonna get a farm Yeah, yeah, I mean it's interesting cuz like I grew up in Canada I didn't I didn't leave Canada till I was 28 years old. So yeah.

And then I just ended up in L.A. when the show was on and. Never left for 20 years, you know, but but I mean, I did love love living in L.A. It was fun being there and it was always good doing doing stand up. It was it was a good time to be in L.A. But I guess when the pandemic happened, I thought, I don't want to be in LA anymore. And so I moved back, found this farm, didn't really know anything about farming.

That was going to be my question. I didn't grow up as a farmer. No, I was, uh, what did you intend on growing? Yeah. What did you know? Um, so I, I, I do enjoy the outdoors. Like I like going fishing and nature and being in the wilderness and stuff like that. So I basically found this place because I just kind of wanted to live out in sort of

the wilderness and just because I'm still touring all the time. And when you come home, I thought it'd be cool to be like not in the city. And so that's where it started. But there's these two old barns on the property, and then you think, oh, maybe I should get a mule. That seemed like a logical thing to do. Then it just took off from there, but it's been best experience, best thing I've ever really decided to do.

Yeah, I'm so happy to have done it. How long have you been on the farm now? Basically, this three and a half years pretty much. And do you feel like, because one of the things that I would think after this amount of time is that you've learned a lot on that farm? It's like starting with the mule. The mule, this is Fanny, if people can see Fanny here, she is an incredible mule. And it started out, the idea to get a mule for me was, I was thinking, oh, that'd be kind of funny, because I was picturing it looking more like a donkey. Yeah.

Because a mule- Because that looks more like a horse. Yeah, that's a nice look at it. No, a mule is half horse, half donkey. Oh, I didn't know that. So they have one less chromosome than a horse and one more than a donkey, or maybe it's the other way around because it's a hybrid. And so because of that, they're really smart and they're stubborn.

People say they're stubborn, but they're really smart. And you sort of start to learn all this stuff about these animals in order to ride her, for example, like, you know, it's taken a, she wouldn't turn left for about the first six months. I mean, she figured out that I knew, I didn't know what I was doing and she just wouldn't listen to me. So I had to kind of get some training and stuff, but now I've really kind of have this really close daily relationship where I get up and I ride her off into the wilderness and there's all sorts of places to ride on her around the property and it's the most

relaxing thing. Uh, cause, uh, you know, it's, uh, you know, when you walk outside in nature, it can kind of relax you cause you sort of, sort of brings you back to your primal sort of instincts of being, you know, you know, predators and, you know, fight or flight and all this stuff. But when you're on a mule, you're also worried

about like falling off and, uh, you know, breaking your neck too. So you're really, it snaps you into the moment and just, uh, that's what I'm doing now I'm riding around on my mule and, uh, I love it, but it's, it's an amazing thing. So a lot of it's been a daily sort of thing, figuring out how to look after her and then, and then lots of other stuff too. Do you grow food?

Are you growing anything? Just like a garden. Not. It's not really hay. We grow hay. There's like hay fields that we cut. The crazy thing about you telling this is that I also I also would believe that this is an elaborate prank. Like if you just revealed you were like, dude, I don't have a fucking farm. I mean, god, you got me dude. I wish it was in a way, but then I wouldn't get to live there.

So no, I mean, I've been thinking about this because I've been talking about the show a lot lately, you know, and it's because it just came out last week and, and, you know, people have suggested that it's maybe the most normal thing that I've done in my life. But I don't know. You know how, you know how, you know when I started my show, we've talked about this before, but it was sort of back in the early days of video and stuff

and going out in the street and doing this crazy stuff was kind of not as normal. But now you see it everywhere, right, on TikTok and people painting their parents' house and doing pranks and all this stuff. They're all doing that shit. And it was starting, you know, at a certain point as I've gotten older, I thought, well, you know, because I can't really keep doing that, you know? And then you start to think, well, what would be probably the weirdest thing I could do would be to just go do something

normal now, right? Because it seems almost like there's so much weird shit out there. Yeah. Maybe just to go do something, you know, normal. There's gotta be people out there watching you do something normal and the whole time they're like, he's gonna, there's gonna be a turn here any second. Yeah. Yeah. You know, but it's, it's, the show's really funny. I mean, it's, it's, it's my relationship with my parents is hilarious. They're on the show. You're still lucky to have your parents still. Yeah. And mean, it's my relationship with my parents is hilarious. They're on the show.

You're still lucky to have your parents still. Yeah, and that's really the main reason I moved back to Canada. And I thought, well, I'm gonna move back to Canada, be close to my parents and my brother, and then. How far are they from you now? They're about 30 minutes away. Oh, perfect.

And so they're actually at the farm right now, and so it's great. But yeah, so they're on the show. And they're hilarious. They got all the big laughs on the show. The tables have turned, but they're razzin' me on the show now. So I'm not pulling pranks on them and stuff anymore.

They may pull a prank on me on the show. I don't want to give it away. But if you watch the show, they may pull a prank on me on the show. I don't want to give it away, but if you watch the show, there's, they may sort of flip it around on me a little bit. Aww, they're so cute. So adorable. They're so sweet. Yeah, but it's, no, it's, and also, you know, I shot all the shows too, so it's like, you know, I, you know, I get my cameras and I'm still doing, you know, I always like this

tech stuff, right? Yeah. We're talking about the microphone before the show. So I get my cameras and I'm really kind of enjoying just the creative process of filming and directing these shows. I directed these shows. The last thing I directed was Freddy Got Fingered. So you know it's gonna be good.

Hell yeah, fuck yeah. It's gonna be like good, like Freddy Got Fingered. Legendary, it's a classic. Exactly. I loved it. Daddy, would you like some sausage? Exactly. So this, because you did inspire so many people to do weird and prank stuff.

Like one of the things we do, we encourage people to go to Starbucks and then in like the latest one, because we've done different versions of this, is we try to tell them, please use a British accent Please say bad one Say happy birthday, okay, and and try to say I love you if you can also and then we have people send in Videos of them doing it so people have been submitting. So this is like an example of people and sending in for us. Nice. Laughing Laughing Laughing

Hello! Hello! Happy Birthday! Laughing Laughing That's it. Now Starbucks is just like what the hell is going on with this influx of British people?

That's awesome. Oh, nice. Thank you for choosing Starbucks. What can I get started for you? Hello. Hello. May I please have one lemonade and one water, please? Not bad, not bad. Yeah. What size you want?

Medium. All right. Who else can. What size you want? Medium. All right, who else can I get for you? And that would be all? Happy birthday. Oh my gosh. Have you heard? Happy birthday, now. Happy birthday.

I like that he, that guy was like, yeah. Yeah. Have you heard from Starbucks? No, I haven't. like, yeah. Yeah. Have you heard from Starbucks? Not yet. No, no, no. Not yet. This is, this has gotta be starting to kind of, like they must be starting to wonder at this point,

like if every Starbucks, is this worldwide? No, do, are British people, when they go to Starbucks, are they talking in an American accent? That'd be a fun. That's a really good, cause we actually told them, I think last week we were like, hey, if some people feel like their British is so bad, we're like, just do a different accent. Just don't speak in your natural accent.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I think adding happy birthday is such a curve ball to somebody who's like, why are you saying happy birthday to me? Oh, they say happy birthday to the Starbucks? Yeah, yeah. To everybody, okay. Yeah, you just have to say happy birthday. Well, it started with I love you.

We just tell people we loved them. And sometimes they'd be like, I love you, too. Or you have to call them mommy. We would call them mommy. I love you is a really interesting one, though, because it throws people sometimes. Like, I'd pull up and be like, I love you. And they were like, what?

Everybody's filming it and putting it up online, right? So OK. Yeah. It's a very, it's kind of a nice prank, though. putting it up online, right? So okay. Yeah. It's a very, it's kind of a nice prank though. Yeah. Yeah. That's one thing.

Exactly. Which is cool. I mean, it's sort of, nobody's getting hurt here. No, it's positive. It's actually just kind of a nice accent to hear. It probably even improves the day of the Starbucks employee. You know, we've got a lot of these nice British tourists here and it's very kind of positive. This guy did a nice one.

Welcome to Starbucks. Are we starting anything to eat for you? No thank you love. Could I get a venti hot pistachio latte please? Could you make that with moose soup? He's doing like little inside stuff. I'm sorry, uh, how do you say it in English? Oat milk. Okay.

What do you say in English? In English. That cheese danish is talking to me now. Uh, you know, I'm trying not to eat carbs. When I see it though. There's no carbs in that. I know. When I see it I think just let me eat you one time. I better not love.

Let's just stick with Marthe please. Anything else? That's it. Okay, come on up. Thank you. Happy birthday. He's really getting some good ones. What's everybody?

How are you? What's everybody? Oh, F-A-R-T. Let me grab. Okay, I sniffed that one. Sniffiff that one. Is that a thing Brett Sayers does now? They're all show references. Oh okay okay. So he's really keeping it like inside baseball. Oh yeah. Oh it didn't tap. Let me try again. His accent's also fading, which I love. Has he appeared on the show before, or is this his sort of... No, just a...

So this is, he's gonna be stoked about this too. Yeah. And he's just rose to the top of the pack of British Starbucks ordering pranksters. Exactly. Yeah. That's amazing. Well, yeah, that's always was... We tried a few things like that back in the day.

It's so much fun when you get people involved, right? Yeah, it's more fun. And I'm actually kind of impressed, though, that you're such a nice sort of warm thing. It's a nice one, yeah. It's nothing too crazy about it. Maybe you could probably make it a little crazier. You could make it crazier.

You could probably get them to throw something. Oh my God. Okay. Tom Green it up a little. Throw some cheese at a throw something. Oh my god. I'm gonna tell them green it up a little. Throw some cheese throw some cheese at them or something. Yeah no no I'm just kidding I think it's nicer like this because you don't want you know you don't want people getting hurt right you don't want to send people out to get hurt. No no no no. I used to we did when I did a college radio show before like my show I started when I was like in not in college but I was I guess I was in high

school I went down to the university station and I started when I was like, not in college, but I guess I was in high school, I went down to the university station and I started this radio show in Ottawa. And it was midnight till two in the morning, it was the only time slot they would give me. And at two in the morning I'd say to everyone listening, meet me on Parliament Hill in Canada, on the front lawn of the Parliament building, bring a soccer ball and some pizza,

and we go play soccer on the front lawn of the Parliament buildings, bring a soccer ball and some pizza, and we go play soccer on the front lawn of the Parliament building, at 2 a.m. till the sun came up, basically. How many people would come out? Like 60 people would come out. Wow! Yeah, it was pretty cool. And it sort of became this thing that we did for a few years there, not every week, but we probably did it 20 times or something. how many of the 60 were you concerned about?

Are you like this guy's fucking? There'd be a few right? there The guy listening at 130. Yeah, I mean and it's guys. It's not girls It was all it was all you know It was always kind of people that I find anybody that ever got involved or engaged in things like that were usually pretty kind of creative people like these guys And you know like they kind of were into the spirit of it I mean there hasn't been too many situations where it was

Yeah, a lot like today, you know where it's online and you read you know You see the kind of things that come in on online it gets a little nutty sometimes but the pranks now are like like to really Elicit almost like illicit violence and get people, I feel like it's, I don't know, I don't find it that. It seems to me like- There's a guy that bumps into people, and then when people are like, what the fuck, he has a bodyguard?

Yeah. And you're like, that's not- I like that fart guy you and I pass to each other. The guy that just beefs in front of chicks. It's a fart machine. That's so funny. And that's really, he's like, welcome to the barbecue. Leslie Nielsen used to do that all the time.

Oh yeah. This is comedy. Farting machines are real comedy. Another one that I feel like is not mean, but it's so funny to kind of, this guy is in a clothing store, and he's asking for pants that they don't have, a size they don't have. And then they just keep asking, and the guy's pants that they don't have, a size they don't have.

Right, right. And then they just keep asking, and the guy's like, we don't have that. And then he's like, well what kind do you want? And the guy's like, 35, 30, he's like, yeah we don't, we have zero. He's like, no not a zero, we want a 35, 30. And they just keep going back and forth.

Like. It's interesting how like things going on too long has become sort of quite. Yeah. Yeah. Fun to watch. It's interesting how like things going on too long has become sort of quite fun to watch. It's fun. I did a video once that was just a throwaway thing that was on my public access show. I don't think it even aired on MTV because MTV re-aired the stuff from the old show. And it's now become one of the most brought up videos where I went to Subway and I just ordered a sub and then I said, oh, can I have a little more lettuce, please?

Can I have a little more tomato? Okay, that's a little more black olives, please. A little salt and pepper, some oil. Can I have some little extra mayonnaise? Can I have a little more lettuce? But it went on for like 20 minutes, right? It was a subsist. And this is one of these things where I've been hearing that Subway has been having people

doing this. Yeah, yeah. Just a little more. But it was a nothing bit. things with, you know, I've been hearing that Subway's been having people doing this, you know? Yeah, yeah. Just a little more. But it was a nothing bit. It was a nothing bit. And then all of a sudden YouTube, it's like the one that popped on YouTube more than any of them.

What's interesting is that, is Subway allowed to refuse you the free items? That's sort of the loophole. That's what I felt was kind of like the interesting loophole. Because there's nowhere there's a sign where it says, you can't have a little more lettuce. You know, like there's no rule that... And it's subject, a little more subjective. Yeah. Yeah.

It's not like avocado, which is a premium item. Yeah, I redid this, exactly. I noticed in 1994, they don't wear the gloves either. Nice. I think the golden age. That's been pointed out, but... Let's see. But...

Can I get extra cheese as well? I guess I'll get extra cheese as well. I guess I'll get some lettuce. And I'll get some tomatoes. Black olives. Look at the baby. Probably 25 or there or something. Two pickles. And I guess I'll get some pepper.

A little bit of lettuce. A little more lettuce as well. He's like, okay lettuce okay some mayonnaise and I guess a couple more tomatoes so funny why is it funny because you know it's a huge sandwich. And some pepper. Ha ha ha ha. A few more black olives as well. A few more. Just a few more. And a couple tomatoes. That's so much. And some mayonnaise I guess.

And I guess a little bit of green pepper. A little bit. And some onion as well please. That's cute. And it's polite. That also helps that you're very polite. And some mayonnaise I guess. I guess.

And your tone. I guess I I guess. And your tone. I guess I want some. The monotone. It's funny to me that we're actually watching this in its entirety right now. I know. Sorry. We're not only annoying everybody back then,

but we're annoying everybody now as well. I love it. It's so heavy. Look at that sandwich. Just scroll to the end of this. It's only halfway through. He never says anything in? Look at that fucking thing, dude.

A little mayonnaise? Now he's shaking his head. Some lettuce? Oh, he stopped you there. I actually forgot whether he drew the line or not or whether I quit. He drew the line. He drew the line. Like, that's it.

Did he put toothpicks in it? I don't know, but I tell you, that was a good, so. You had to push that guy. That sweet man, you pushed him to the point where he goes, that's it. That's it, man. I'm not doing any of this anymore. There's something about-

You already got 17 sandwiches worth in this sandwich. That's it. I'm not doing any of this anymore. There's something about- You already got 17 sandwiches worth in this sandwich. Yeah. That's it. I think that started out, that idea started out out of necessity, you know, because I didn't have much money when I was a kid and we'd go skateboarding and we were hungry. Yeah.

So it was like, you get a nice extra salad out of the deal. But- That's awesome. But yeah, there's something fun about like rousing fast food places. Yeah. Because everybody relates to it. Everybody can get involved. Yeah, but there's like, it's funny because there's this like line too.

I mean, you think about it because nobody wants you to be like a dick to like an hourly wage person. Right. But there's something like endearing about you're just at, you're not demanding. That's a big like factor in it. You tell you like I guess I'll have a little more it's an interesting point because I've thought about this quite a bit over the years because You know when I was a when I was a kid there like you know that that guy was making a lot more money than I was You know like I didn't have a job I was just running around the video camera and I was living in my parents basement and to you know

I didn't have a job. I was just running around with a video camera and I was living in my parents' basement and you know, razzin' people in the street or messing with people at the subway. Like I was punching up, you know what I mean? Like this was like, this wasn't you know, me going around messing with people in the same way. It kind of felt like speaking truth to power.

You know, like talking to the subway guy. You know, this guy's like, you know, a real sort of established sort of member of our society that keeps society running, you know. And I was just a kid in my parents' basement without a job. I was going around. It was more, I would apply it more to like security guards.

Like we'd wrap security guards a lot. Everybody hates security guards. Yeah, and they'd kick us out of places for skateboarding and stuff like that. Charlie, come here, come here, come. My dog Charlie's with me. Come here, Charlie, come. Should introduce everyone.

But so, being young and going and doing pranks on the street, and being young and broke and doing pranks on the street, it felt like less mean. Yeah. And so, that's I think kind of a distinguishing thing I think. You know you see like everybody now has the phone they can shoot perfect audio and video and the sort of the you know the ability to enter this sort of world has gotten so much easier for people that that you do get the people you're talking about who just haven't really thought it through.

They're just trying to do something let's go up and you know punch somebody people you're talking about who just haven't really thought it through. They're just trying to do something. Let's go up and punch somebody or be mean. But I've been guilty of watching a lot of this stuff. I actually really like watching... I talk about this in my standup special, but I'm not doing a bit, but I do watch Karen's getting arrested and tased a lot. Yeah. Oh, that's cool. I do enjoy that. do watch Karen's getting arrested and tased a lot. Yeah. I do enjoy that. I watch Karen's getting arrested and tased. It's something that I really enjoy. And it's sort of mean because, yeah, you're not sure who is the instigator here.

Is the Karen the one that started it or is this sort of the mischievous young prankster sort of? Yeah, they're not pranksters. She definitely started it. Started it, yeah. Yeah, she got arrested. Okay, good. She did?

Can I see the beginning of this? But then sometimes it's people capitalize on somebody who's maybe a little bit sort of, because you can wind a Karen up pretty easily. Yeah, oh there we go. She goes to throw her. Getting physical too. She's about to throw her coffee.

Oh, oh, shit. Yeah, oh, she really took a smack at him. Damn. Wow, see, yeah, I can't, I love this. I love watching this stuff. I can't really... Oh, no, wow, she's really nice. Yeah, you know, she's... The guy's grabbing her too. Well, he's like, stay away from my lady. But the thing I kind of wonder is, is the guy also kind of like, sort of realizes, hey, this is some good content for my TikTok, you know? So they kind of troll them in a little bit.

Which is also kind of fun. He's trying to get his lady away from her. Yeah. Holy crap. Oh my gosh. See at this point this guy has to realize that, you know, it's probably not a fair fight. No, but they are filming this Karen without her consent, which is riling her up. Yeah, she came at them, though.

I know. She was locked up for this. Oh, cool. The older lady was. The older lady was locked up? Yeah. Yeah. Wow, because she really, really... She got physical, she estimated the whole thing. She really hurt that guy, too.

She really smacked him pretty good. She's gonna throw a hot coffee at him. That's crazy. This is sort of our society just sort of crumbling, basically, is what's happening. Well, she got the story, he's wearing a Palestine shirt. I'm sure that's what fired her up about this. Oh, okay, so it was political too?

Yeah, it got political too. Oh boy, okay. Well, I do find myself sort of watching a lot of this. I watch mostly TikTok now is pretty much what I watch now. I can't stop watching it. I can't stop, it's where I get my news of the world because it's, yo, have you been on world TikTok yet? No. Put that in as a search. So instead of your algorithm giving you what you want to see, you'll actually see what the fuck is happening in the world. It's really interesting stuff or Euro talk is cool too.

Oh, you can turn off your algorithm. Well, you know, I'd like to turn my algorithm off. You know what's interesting is that we actually have some TikToks that- I curate them. Oh, do you want to see what comes up in the news? But I like to highlight the marginalized communities, people without a voice. Okay. Okay. I'm Saj Mahal in India.

I'm sweating me bollocks off. Just about to pass out. I'm dying from this shit. But apart from that, it's all right. That was this gentleman's review of the talk. Oh, is he ordering a Starbucks or is he? I'm sweating me bollocks off. Other than that, it's alright. That was this gentleman's review of the Tog. Is he ordering a Starbucks? I'm sweating me buttocks off. Other than that, it's alright.

His review of the Taj Mahal. It's alright. I feel like a doctor. His actual modern marvel. It's so cool. One of the eight wonders of the world. It's alright, I gotta take a shit. It's fucking hot, man. And you shit. All right, yeah, there you go. It's fuckin' hot, man.

I keep sweatin'. And you're sure that's not on your algorithm? Yeah. That's all I know. That's all I love. Okay, here we go. Parapractice. Okay.

What could possibly be causing her back issues? Here we go. Put your elbows together. That's ridiculous. Fall, like, fall, like, okay. And then I want you to look up. Ooh. She's like, did my tits then I want you to look at me. Pfft. Ooh. Oh.

She's like, did my tits just break? Yeah, she just went down. It sounded like they ripped out. You should get tits like that. Society is crumbling. That's what I'm saying. You think for my next round of boobs I should get these? Fuck yeah.

Because I still have to get reconstruction, Tom. I haven't. Perfect, those are perfect. These are my, I haven't gotten my forever boobs yet. People say there's no such thing as perfection, but I'm fucking looking at it. Those are perfect. Just go with what Tom says. I don't want to weigh in on this.

Have you ever seen a more perfect pair of tits? I mean, they're definitely like the, she did something there. Yeah. There's something going on, for sure. That's what I'm saying. Beautiful. Oh, boy. This is a tattoo saying. Beautiful. Oh boy, ah!

This is a tattoo on the eyeballs. Oh yeah, come on. Why, why do people do these things? I can't. Oh man. Look at that, dude. The end results are so cool, dude. It is so worth it.

I can't even look at that. It's so worth it. Tom, come on. I can't even look at that. To me, that just makes me so sad, really, to think that. What? Really, you like that? It's an artistic expression.

I just feel like, you know, the idea that you're gonna realize at some point that you wanna sort of change your mind. Probably hard to do tattoo removal on the whites of your eyes, too. It probably is. Yeah, yeah, that's probably. That ink stays in there pretty well.

You know, it's not, you can't go in and do the sort of, like, the Pete Davidson, just remove 200, I saw him on Fallon the other day, he just removed all of his tattoos. He did? Like 200 tattoos, and he's been doing it for a year. He's been doing tattoo removal, really? Yeah, yeah, he had to have, but you know.

Wow. I mean, I just saw it on television, but I mean, it's like, I don't think he can do that with the whites of your eyes. No, I started doing, I have a tramp stamp that I wanted to get removed, and I started, I did once, and I was like I'm done. I don't want to go back for this. It's too painful Yeah, it's like hot bacon grease. Imagine doing your entire Wow, grand he spent on tattoo removal Wow good for him has been sober. That's cool

Yeah, it's I don't have a tattoo. I don't have one tattoo Maybe you'll get your mule maybe Fannyule. Maybe Fanny. I could see that. Yeah, I could see that. It really is something though. Next time you guys are up in Canada on tour, you're going to come by the farm. Oh wow. Where is it exactly? We'll go ride some mules.

It's sort of outside of Ottawa, in the Ottawa Valley. No, give me the address. Yeah, exactly. I'll give it to you later for sure. Okay. I'm tearing my eyeballs. But, uh. Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. me the address. Yeah, exactly. I'll give it to you later for sure. Okay. Yeah, yeah.

I'm chewing my eyeballs. But, uh. Oh, this is David Gold. Yeah. Y'all like eggnog? Mm-hmm. That's not eggnog. I love it.

I just can't get enough of it. Yeah. Now look at this steak. I ate all the medium rare parts off of them and we're down to the rare parts. She likes these videos. Yes. But that's good because that's a good size piece of steak. It is. Go back in the frying pan and cook it to medium rare and it'll be nice and warm. Just go somewhere. I get hungry again. No that's why it's golden. He's just showing you his lunch. Right, and that he likes eggnog.

And eggnog, yeah. But you didn't know that before we watched it. That's true, that's true. That's true. That's eggnog. Well, that's true. You get to see some real authentic stuff now online that we didn't get on television

where they had sort of professional writers and producers putting together things that are interesting to watch. Wait, you're trying to tell me... Okay. But I like this. But you get so used to that over a whole lifetime, growing up watching all this really interesting stuff that it becomes uninteresting.

And now to see something that is just sort of mundane is also kind of exciting, I think. Well, I agree. That's kind of what I'm saying about moving to the farm and just doing something normal. Yeah. It seems kind of like a little bit new. Well, this feels subversive. Yeah.

Like I'm just watching this guy, David, and who knows where he lives? He's making a steak. I was expecting it to be, that's not egg nog. I was expecting something like that, but no, it's just egg nog and a steak. It's wholesome. I ate this part of the steak, I can reheat

it later. Yeah. And it's nice we get to see into people's places and see how people live. And it looks like he's doing good. So it's got a nice place there and makes me feel okay about, you know, the way my kitchen normally looks. Although I, I'm engaged now. I have a fiance now.

So my house is like, uh, a lot. She's very, she helps me organize my life. Amanda does. So, uh, my kitchen used to look like that, but not anymore. Will you get married on the farm? Uh, it's very possible, very possible. Yeah. We haven't decided exactly what we're doing yet, but yeah, we just got engaged

right before Christmas. It's very exciting. Oh, Mazel, very new. And we're traveling around in, uh, in my camper van. Uh, so she's, uh, I'm sure she's really excited about that. Uh, we're living in a van right now. Women love vans. Yeah.

And they love sleeping in them. Absolutely. Absolutely. That's, that's how, that's how we met. I pulled up in the van. I said, get in and no, no, actually we met on the, on, on Instagram. Uh-uh.

Uh-huh. I was, uh, so I moved back to the farm and there's a pond on the farm that, uh, of course being Canadian, I thought, well, I gotta play hockey on a pond on the farm that of course being Canadian I thought well I gotta play hockey on the pond in the winter so we had the pond made a little video of me playing hockey on the pond and she saw that she lives in the area she sent me a video of a do-it-yourself Zamboni which is what you used to clean the ice you know this year you're Canadian. And that's how we met.

Most Canadian way to meet ever. So Canadian. Yeah, yeah. And so now we're, I'm doing a standup tour right now. So I was just at the mothership last night all weekend. And then before that we were in Dallas and Chattanooga and Oklahoma City and just traveling. That's awesome.

Doing spots and now we're gonna take off and do some camping. That's cool. Awesome. And then we're going to take off and do some camping. Awesome. And then drive back up to Canada. So I have not been enjoying getting on planes as much this last few years. So I've started driving more to the gigs. It's kind of a... You enjoy it. I enjoy it.

I enjoy not going to the airport and I've been sort of routing the shows so I can just kind of go one to the other. I do love flying. I love flying. It ruins everything, the airport. I want to fly to lunch. I wish I could fly everywhere. You probably can fly to lunch, right? You probably have a jet parked out back or something at this point probably. Come on, man. Yeah, I do. It's actually on the-

This is so incredible though. I mean, it's just so amazing to see what you guys have done here. I mean, I don't even really understand how it all works. I mean, you must be producing a lot of shows here and stuff. Yeah, there's a few things that, yeah. Yeah, and cuz I was at the studio where I was at the studio and was that your house too though, right? Did I do the show at your house? No, did you do it in Resiha?

Did you do the house one? We did do it at the house. I did at your house and then I also did it at- We did it at Willam Hills. We did it at Willam Hills then I also did it at... We did it at Willow Hill's. We did it at Willow Hill's where we had our little baby. Yeah, it was right before you got your other house. That was fun. Oh yeah.

Oh yeah, that was a great studio. It was soundproofed. It was out of our home. So I... Stressful years. Now, was that the first time you set up your studio at home? Obviously, did you imagine this? Did you visualize and sort of manifest this entire empire?

I don't know how this, it all came like slowly together, but each move was always like kind of like an upgrade in how you do the show. Yeah yeah yeah I mean it's just it's amazing like I because I there's a clip that's been kind of circulating of you know from my web ovision show I called it web ovision it was before podcasting was called podcasting. You were the father of this stuff Tom if there was no Tom Green there'd be no your mom's house. It was, well, technology was all changing and I thought, you know, cause I'd always made my own show,

like on Public Access it was me making the show. And then, you know, the internet was happening. We always used to upload audio clips onto my website and things like that back in the 90s, you know? And my friends, Glenn Humplick, who was on my show, the cohost on my show, Glenn Humplick, who was on my show, the co-host on my show, and Phil Giroux, they're computer guys. So going back to early days, growing up, doing the show back in the 90s, they were tech entrepreneurs. And my dad was a computer guy too. So they

were kind of always looking at, you know, video, how fast at video, how fast the internet has to be until we can actually stream video on the internet. So we were just kind of waiting for it to happen, waiting for just to be able to send video on the internet. And then all of a sudden it was possible. So I just made Freddie Got Fingered, right? And then after you make a movie like that, if you want to do a TV show, you have to build a studio in your living room. That's the only way to make a TV show after you make a movie like that. So necessity kind of was the reason for it. But then so we did it. But then Joe comes on the show and I remember he's sort of looking around. There's this really cool clip of him and he

says, oh man, this is great, you know, you don't need a network executive. Someone's just got to figure out how to make money doing this, right? And then of course, Joe figured that out, right? And I'm playing at a strip mall in Chattanooga. But isn't that wild that you were really an innovator? You were like the first generation of DIY television. It's interesting because I was being in LA doing it and I started inviting just everybody up,

all the comics and stuff and it was really kind of fun. But there was no revenue stream at the time. I mean, I had a couple little deals here and there, but they were barely covering the cost of just my one employee and the cameras and the internet was expensive. Well, it had to be back then. Yeah, we had to get super bonded T1 lines brought up into the Hollywood Hills and all this stuff.

But it was kind of, yeah, it was pretty exciting though. We had a lot of weird shit happen back then because it was live and it was, you gotta kind of imagine going live with Joe Rogan or whoever we had on that week, and you're the only live show on the internet. Like there was no live, Instagram didn't exist yet,

there was no live streaming on YouTube or anything. So we were literally the only live show on the internet. And there was a lot of people watching, we'd get a lot of people, the stream would crash at first, we had to figure out how to make the- Did you have an idea of how people were watching? Like did you have- Yeah, there were like millions of people watching

on various platforms, because we would play, it would then be posted on my website. And it was, yeah, you gotta remember like it was not even, there was no YouTube, so there was a company in San Francisco called bitgravity.com, and they were basically a CDN content distribution network and they were basically making servers that you can upload video to and then embed it on your website, right? And they weren't even really making it for broadcast. They were making it for you know, just

various uses, right? And so now we had a probably like training videos and information Yeah, and just you know yeah, just websites and things like that and so we were sort of doing this sort of entertainment type show But I remember so I had to pay per click right and it was you know Initially we weren't getting very many people watching and Then this was in the MySpace era. So we then started embedding.

This was right when they came up with the idea. You could get an embed code, embed the, this is probably really inside baseball here, but you could embed it on the MySpace page. And so we started doing that. And at the end of the month, I got a bill for $75,000. Fuck. Right?

And I called them up, and I believe I actually was crying, actually, when I called them up. I can't. And then they actually let me off. They did a sponsorship deal with me. They did? Yeah. Oh, wow.

They didn't make me pay for it, which was really cool. And this great guy, Barrett Lyon, who was really innovative technology guy there, kind of came in and they supported. 70-fund. Yeah, because it was just like, you know, it was millions and millions and millions of downloads. And the price structure was set for like,

you know, if you have 10,000 downloads, that'll be. So, that was, and I remember one day, I replay this in my head quite often actually. We were sitting there in my bedroom, I had a bedroom that was sort of the studio where we had all the computers and everything. And I'm on my computer and I get an email on the website and somebody, hey, we're up in San Francisco,

we really love what you're doing man, it's like really cool, you know, you should come check out what we're doing up here or maybe do something with us. And I'm like, oh that's cool, yeah, yeah, yeah, we're just doing our own thing here, yeah thanks, nice meeting you. And then it was YouTube, these guys from YouTube.

So in their apartment, in their apartment up there, in YouTube, yeah guys from YouTube. Well that ain't shit. In their apartment up there in YouTube. Stop. Yeah, oh yeah, that's cool, you keep doing it. Yeah. In my mind I was thinking, yeah, I'm doing something. Oh, you do your thing, we'll do our thing over here. That happened a few times over the years where I go, oh, maybe I probably should have gone

up and met those guys. Oh. But anyways, but no, it was, it was, it was, it was fun. And then, you know, and then all of a sudden, you know, all of a sudden the technology started to catch up and people were streaming and everywhere, but we had some pretty fun early days. We had, we built a switch and some guys working with me who were like, kids out of film school who were really smart and they would figure out how to build weird shit

that we'd come up with. We had a switch under the desk that we sort of soldered. Like there was a soldering gun involved and it hooked up to the whole studio and you would flip the switch and all the cameras would come on, the lights would come on. Wow. The computer would start recording. Another computer would tell the, when you turned it off it would then record it and

then post it. It was doing all this sort of Linux sort of computer code talking to each other. But it was really basically set up so I could get up in the middle of the night and walk out into the living room and flip the switch and the whole studio would come on. I'd be by myself and then there was a switcher on the table and the phone would start ringing and I'd just do these.

No, shit. And so I would get up. This is probably why it didn't take off I think because I would get up and I would put clown makeup on, usually at around one in the morning, just sort of whenever I felt like it, which was usually at once a week. I would sort of get the urge to get up and put my clown makeup on and then I would go out and it

was the French clown of midnight. I would speak French, I speak French, because I'm Canadian. And I'd go out and I just, every once in a while you'd tune on and at midnight there'd be a two hour clown speaking French to people calling. Just French. Just French, yeah.

And, uh, and, uh, yeah, so it might've been just a little too obtuse I think for, uh, for people, but, uh, that's so amazing dude. But, uh, but no, it was, uh, it was fun for sure. But, uh, there was something fun about it being kind of, uh, you know, just sort of just doing it. And we had a lot of pretty... Like one of the things was we had a group of people

who were essentially, their life became about pranking the show, right? And so there's a phone on the desk and they would call and they would say, do a barrel roll, which is what this thing was. It was from 4chan, it was this online, sort of they're, you know, big chat room basically, right?

So they would call up and say, do a barrel roll, or rickrolling, they would rickroll. And so this was sort of the beginning of the end of the taking phone calls thing, but it came kind of like a thing where it was, I wasn't really sure if I was creating this. What would you do when they? Well, I would feign anger to the point,

like I was angry, but then I would make it way worse. And so we sort of had this ongoing kind of, war basically going on, which was fun. But you know, I think now that there's so many places for people to prank, it wasn't, it's not as, it sort of became a, yeah, I mean, if you, I get people going on my social media now every day saying do a barrel roll.

Like they're still, they're still mad about it. Yeah, here we go. Here's probably, yeah. I'm not sure what, be careful what happens here. Sometimes they said some things that you probably might want to beep out too. Hi, I'm Zinon and hi Tom Green. Tom Green. Tom Green, can you do a barrel roll for me?

A barrel roll? Yeah. A barrel roll. On air. A barrel roll. Yeah. A barrel roll. A barrel roll? A barrel roll. I have a feeling this probably doesn't go anywhere by the way. But likely goes on for about half an hour. But that's you also dealing with it in the moment. Yeah, yeah. You're repeating it. Oh yeah, and you know, it was, there was this feeling of, even though we would have a lot of people watching ultimately, when you were live it wasn't necessarily, I don't know, there was this sort of anonymity to it, even though there was ultimately a lot of people

would watch the videos when we post them, but there was this sort of feeling that you could sort of say anything on the internet back then and it wasn't really being you know watched yeah by the you couldn't get cancelled for saying something wrong or something not sure we made a habit of going on saying things you're not supposed to say but there was this sort of feeling of like nobody's watching this right which was kind of nice actually. Yes. You know, it was kind of, you know, it's, uh, you know, you could experiment and not

worry about, uh, you know, uh, you know, screwing up. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Charlie, look at this, look at this girl here. Come here. Come here, Charlie. It's my dog Charlie.

Oh. Did Charlie fart earlier? Uh, that was me actually. That was you? That was Charlie. It was probably Charlie. Oh, Charlie. It's my dog, Charlie. Oh. Did Charlie fart earlier? That was me, actually. That was you? Charlie? It was probably Charlie. Oh, hey.

It was a good fart. I just thought that was the thing to say. Is Charlie a boy or what is... Charlie's a girl, yeah. Charlie identifies as... Yeah, identifies as a girl. She's a girl. But yeah, she's a rescue.

She's named after John Steinbeck's travels with Charlie. Oh, my God. Because we were... She's a beautiful dog. Her first year John Steinbeck's travels with Charlie. Oh my god. Because we were... She's a beautiful dog. Her first year of her life we spent out in the desert in the van. But yeah, she's... She's got a sweet face. Yes. Rescues are special too.

She comes on stage with me on all my shows too. Yeah, I think I saw an image of that. She's gotten to the point now where she just sits there in a little chair and... And enjoys the show. She doesn't get thrown by saw a clip of that. She's gotten to the point now where she just sits there in a little chair and enjoys the show. She doesn't get thrown by noise or anything like that. In the beginning she did, you know, in the beginning she did, but she's pretty cool with it now. In fact, I'd say that she actually looks forward

to the show. Really? I can tell at show time, you know, when we're doing shows every night, she's sort of before the show, she's starting, then she hears the crowd. I see her hear the crowd, then she walks towards the stage.

And it's a nice thing. That's very cool. Here's something nice to kind of take us out on. Oh, that's a good one. He's okay. Oh, oh, oh! Oh, oh! Yeah, that's not good. Nice golf cart jumps are fun though.

Holy shit boys. Is that a rascal or a golf cart? Fuck! I think that's a rascal. That could have been a rascal. How would he go that fast? That's a motorcycle. Oh, oh, mech, oh.

It fell on him, That's the worst. That's really what the damage has done. Yeah. Oh boy. Fuck. Oh, that's... Oh! Oh, that's a broken neck right there. Come on, man. Shit.

How many people... must be... What are they feeding that lawn? It's so green. Have they statistically done any sort of studies on how many people have been... What are they feeding that lawn? Have they statistically done any sort of studies on how many people have been, you know, permanently sort of altered, paralyzed by, you know, because of the front fall of the kids. Because of social media, because of this desire, because of these phones and, you know, of course, this sort of trend, I guess, of doing this. Because of us, you mean? Yeah, because of these phones, and you know, of course, this sort of trend, I guess, of doing this. Because of us, you mean?

Yeah, because of you guys. This is good. All of us being jerks, creating this stuff, celebrating it. Absolutely, absolutely. Well, because people, uh-oh. Pay attention to the wind. Oh! Wow.

You know what? It was all worth it. He made it onto your mom's house. Yeah. Yeah. It's fine. Oh man The face plant is yeah, that's always hard to watch. Yes. Is he okay? I don't think so I know I don't think so

Scranning oh What's that? Scranning. Scranning. Oh boy. Oh, oh my gosh. So what did, do you know what happened to him? Or is this your- He's fine.

He is? I think he's okay. I think he's, oh there he is. Oh boy. Poor guy. Poor guy. Poor guy. Oh he's walking.

Oh okay, good, okay, good. He's got a back brace. Okay, here's the list of- He'll make that jump the next time he tries. This is the injury report, ready? Eight broken ribs, pelvis broken in two spots, fractured C4, C5, and C7 neck, double brain bleed, 23 broken bones in right shoulder,

medically induced coma for three days. He's been recovering for three years now, and he's back to doing wheelies and basic stunts. Smell good,, that's good. Just living. You don't want to give up on those dreams of making that jump. Scott Kranek. Yeah, that's, I always had sort of a, like I was a skateboarder.

I loved skateboarding and I always, you know, did jumps and stuff, but I always sort of had something in my mind that said, okay, that's the limit. That's the line. You knew a line? Yeah. Oh. Hey, Tom, did you get your period? Did I get my period?

I got mine right before we started. No, I haven't. At the break. I'm right on the, I'm about to. I can tell that it's like. I gotta track mine, hold on. I gotta put it in my app so I get my days. A lot of times our periods sync up.

Oh yeah, nice. It is kinda cool. So how's Garth Brooks doing? Has he gotten, has he gotten a hold of you? Or has there been some sort of, any sort of resolution to that? No. You know what's interesting is that

we heard through personal contacts that he was very unamused by this. And then shortly thereafter, there's alleged accusations by his former makeup artist that he allegedly did things to her that are very, very nasty. But you were sort of suggesting he was a serial killer, I think is what it was. What I all, I-

Was that the suggestion? Or I don't know, I don't wanna, allegedly you suggested that. What I allegedly said was that allegedly that people had gone missing. Okay, I'm gonna say that. That kind of lined up perfectly with certain tour dates. It was just a fun sort of observation, right?

Wasn't meant to be taken seriously, I don't think. I also noted that he had some very notably awkward just personality traits. Okay. Have you seen his Facebook posts and his social media posts? They're very unnatural. Okay.

You know what it is? It's like the uncanny valley. Do you know what that is? Like when someone's robotic where they appear to be human. Okay. But something's just slightly off. Like Chris Gaines was an interesting choice as well.

But I mean. You said it. but a great country artist and incredible legend of our time, right? But the dark side of the force. Cause I just put out a country album. That's why I brought it up. So yeah, so I was tying it into myself. So in addition to, in addition to go check it out, it's called home to the country and you can hear it and, and it's available everywhere right now that you get

Country music and you get this is the Tom Green documentary. Yeah, he directed the Tom Green country series And the stand-up special I got a mule. Yeah, and an album and an album. Yeah, and the album is the Soundtrack to the show and we record it, there's this incredible legendary band from Canada called The Tragically Hip who, Yes, I know them. Yeah, so absolutely. So we recorded it all in their studio and the music sounds great.

So go check out Home To The Country. When you, do you ever do this thing, like when you introduce yourself to people, do you go, you know, I'm a director, producer, you know what I'm saying? I'm a choreographer. I do, I got music, I make music. That's, yeah, with that accent. I don't, I was just making up an accent. That's good, I make music. Yeah, with that accent.

I was just making up an accent. That was good, yeah, absolutely. I don't know if I do introduce myself like that, but at one point I think I had that on my Twitter, because I saw that's what you're supposed to do. I put director, now it just says goofball on there. Goofball. Goofball's my favorite.

You know, Hitler was a goofball. A lot of people don't know that. Well, maybe I'll have to change it back to what it was before I guess If you have you ever seen before we press play on this Have you ever seen? This this is Garth's introduction. I think I think I may have seen it on your show Maybe on ours, but it's been a long time since I've seen it

This is when this is when we first learned kind of how I followed this sort of what's been going on on the... Because I watched the show. This is when he joined Facebook. I guess it's official. We're now on Facebook. I really wasn't sure about this at the start. But then a friend of mine said something that just made all kinds of sense. She said, think of it more as a conversation.

I like that. I see. Okay. Maybe I haven't seen that, but yeah. That's one L. It goes on. It's. OK, maybe I haven't seen that. But yeah, that's one. It goes on. It's much longer. But you know.

How do you feel watching it? What do you feel? It feels like it's the beginning of sort of mainstream media colliding with independent media. And there's sort of a way that things were always written and done before. And it doesn't really translate to You also feel the discomfort inside of you. I don't think that that guy is like a serial killer or anything like that

Well you have to watch more No you have to watch more You need to watch more I find my mom so it's wiping the walls out between you and me and I really like that Look at his eyes I guess in my case, hotel room. I really, because it's just such an absurd thing to suggest, though it's just what's hilarious about it.

But I would think that maybe he would have to come on. Maybe he could get Chris Gaines to come on the show. You know, we've reached out multiple times. Okay. And the feedback we got was no. Oh, well. It's too well, I think it would probably serve at least Chris Gaines well to come on the show. I know.

And let bygones be bygones, you know? I pray for it. I'd like to see that. I believe that will happen someday. I hope it happens. Tom Green, I have to go to the fly port, so I have to run. Thanks, man.

It's always great to see you, man. So good. Thank you for coming in. Appreciate you Thanks, man. It's always great to see you, man. So good. Thank you for coming in. Appreciate you having me on. Make sure you check out the documentary, the series, the special, and the album. Dang. You know what I'm saying?

I'm making music and shit. And maybe stop by the farm. I want to come see the mule. Yep, absolutely. Thank you for coming. Thanks, Tom. We'll see you guys next week. Thanks, Christina.

Thank you for coming. Thanks Tom. We'll see you guys next week. FIG Cod Gallivator, Perkman and Stoop Fog Cod Gallivator, Perkman and Stoop Get your passenger, come hurry up Cod Gallivator, Perkman and Stoop GD Reed with his boss and passenger Cod Gallivator, Perkman and Stoop Get your passenger, come hurry up Cod Gallivator, Perkman and Stoop GD Reed with his boss and passenger Get your passenger, cover her up! Come down later for moose soup!

Gee, you read with this box of passengers! Come down, come down, moose soup! Hey, I got you on video! O-M-G G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-G-A-M-T Fuck! Come down later for moose soup You guys are doing good Fuck! Come down for moose soup after You guys are doing good

Fuck! Get your passenger! Come hurry up! Come down later for moose soup T-R-E-E with his boss' passenger Come down, come down, moose Fuck! Fuck!

Fuck! Fuck!