Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura - Tom Segura's Mom: Traumatized | Your Mom's House Ep. 728

Episode Date: October 4, 2023

I Want to Talk About Hawaii!! That’s right, the Main Mommy’s mommy, Charo, joins Tom and Christina again for this week’s YMH. They play her a clip of the local news wishing her a happy 100th birthday, a cool motivational guy, Blind Bob, the Columbia Guy, Horrible or Hilarious, Inmate pen pals, Daddy Demarkco, TikToks, Tom’s Liquid Death Commercial, and try to show her Kevin Leonardo’s infamous Nair video. They also run her through the best fan-made memes from her last appearance, and discuss the catering they got for her birthday, Charo’s old French lover, Christina’s most recent Pazsitzky Effect, and the new thing Charo wants: veneers.https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinaponline.com/tour-dateshttps://store.ymhstudios.com/https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

This week, on your mom's house. So he gets all the hookers and then he goes, you're the one who makes you. What a nice guy. So far, this is the most inspirational show I have watched. That's you. And why did you correct me in that, now? Correct you.

Correct. This is what you need. I tell you something, you hear, you look retarded. You want to remove hair from your body. It's not dirty. He has a trimming his balls. Can we talk about how I know? Welcome to your mom's house. Can I talk like this?

No. Now you are retarded? That looks terrible. I hear a thought. Who's that? One of the guys must have said it. But sounds like my voice. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not talking you weren't talking Are you sure one of them does impressions I forget gosh Hmm, okay, all right, I mean very return So is that crazy so look and do your voice perfectly does it really well? That's so do another one. Why do you do it? Why do you do it? He can pretend to be me. Watch.

He's going to do it now. Go ahead. Do you hurt Tarded? Do you see him do it? Do it again. Do you think I'm fucking retarded? That was his other character. He says so many.

Oh, man. Are you going to hold your ears? Don't hold it. It's terrible. I don't care. And it looks crazy. Can I be me? Can I be me?

Okay. But you'll feel it. You sure you're trying to fuck our shit. We got to do that. Let me show. She's what? I know. I don't allow that. Tell me, Josh. She's. What? I don't allow that. I mean, he does accents.

No, no, that accents. I don't talk like that. I don't think you talk like that. When I said that word, you pay me a lot, so be careful. Yeah. Yeah. Ghost face killers. It's a poet from the streets.

That's how I like my MCs. That's good. Yeah, that's cool, because we're going to do a little hip-hop thing later today how I like my answers. That's good. Yeah, that's cool, because we're going to do a little hip-hop thing later today. So I'm glad we're doing that. How does he do this? It's not amazing. He's been working on your accent for years.

He's been with us since he was 19 very young. So that's when he started practicing. OK, the du Christina. Oh, I can't do her. Because your accent is different, you know? Any. You really need to take a shit I know you're black and you guys who you're on thing, but you still have to shed

Yeah, what I don't know. It's not amazing. I don't know he's so talented. Yeah, still have to shed Yeah, oh any I he doesn't shed He's thin as big tits are back on tool Go see a show man Where are you gonna be next? It's a bad control. Goldie a show, man. That's a hard toy. We're going to come where you're going to be next. Guys, October 7th, the Venetian. One night in Las Vegas,

and then I go Salt Lake City Poo Tithe, added an early Saturday show. So come see me there, and then what else you guys? Madison, Wisconsin, just consen, comedy club on state at the end of October. It's really cool. That is cool. I'll go there. You're going to be the Venetian. Yeah. You'll like it.

Do you know it? Have you been to Las Vegas? Okay. Yeah. Do you like the Venetian? Have you been to Vegas? Yes. You have. I want to go to the Venetian. Really? Yeah. Are you going to touch your Yes. You have. I want to go to the Venetian. Really? Yeah.

Are you going to touch your ears the entire time? It's a bit of touch in my ears and some more spots. Oh my God. Wow. Hey, Charles, can you take that microphone, put it right in front of you? Do you think? Yeah. Perfect.

There you go. There you go. There she goes. Oh, there she comes. There she goes. Oh, there she comes. There she comes. Oh, there she. So it's great to be you're back. I'm thank you for coming to visit us in Austin. Thank you so much for inviting me.

Hang it out with your grandbabies. Oh my God. I have to stop to talk about that. Yes. I want to talk about my grandbabies. No, not yours mine. Yes. But this kid never liked me. And you're all and told me pay them to say to say and face time. I love your grandma. No, I don't. I did not

pay them. No, you gave them treats. You tried them to take away stuff. You just say hi to grandma. So he will come and say, hi and left. And then put that face at, oh, this one woman, I'm gonna have to change this. Okay, we're gonna do regular things. That's the exact detour that I knew we would take. Can I come in? But why? I don't know. I don't know.

You don't have this smaller thing? I don't know. No, baby, this is as small as it goes. Okay, take those out, Mom. He's gonna hook you up. Maybe sad. I know, it was a sad, it was a new attempt, you know. Why can I look cool?

I have to buck and see me here. He's actually looking pretty cool. Yeah, those look cool. You look like you're a rapper. They go, go. Oh, turn me up in my headphones. Oh. Now you look cool.

Yeah. Definitely look cool. They look like they're bigger than your head. They are. Okay. Okay, no way. She looks cute. She looks like your head. They are. Okay. Okay, no way. She looks cute. She looks like a koala.

Yeah, isn't she like a koala? Absolutely. So you know how the show goes. Every show, there's a little how you're doing like we just did and then we play our opening clip. Are you ready for the opening clip of the show? Ready. Okay.

Here you go. Well now at five, we want to take a moment to recognize a very special new six viewer. We're excited about this. She has been an avid viewer. We're told for more than 60 years since news six hit the air. Today marks a very special day. Yeah, we're talking about this lovely lady and she is celebrating her 100th birthday today. Okay, first off, I want to say something I've never gotten to say to anybody before.

Happy 100 birthday. That is amazing. What's up there, Chomo? Oh, well, I want to see a birth certificate because there's no way you're 100 years old. Is that true? Very returned. Anyway, she's beautiful. I can't believe she's a hundred years old. That's not making any sense. No, seriously. But what a blessing to have her around for as long as she is.

She looks fantastic and she's still, you know, I know they're doing what she does. Yeah, we'll celebrate her 110th as well. Yeah. This is a big time. Who is Randy? Don't bring anyone loving for this. Don't burn with a fucking stain! Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, a jam now to the opening song, man.

Move your head. I'm gonna have to hit it. Here you go. I can't believe this. It was worse to be a hundred. I can't believe this. I know. Yeah.

But how do you feel? After this, I feel amazing. Actually for a hundred. Yes. And would you guys have on here? Unbelievable. Can I tell you something too? Yes.

Your son spent a fortune. Yeah. That's the news team in Orlando. So that aired in Orlando. I just see. Yeah. I just say yeah, I Thought yeah, I think you really love me. I know I love you. Yeah, I know you but you'd really really love me Yeah, that's both of those statements are true I do that I am a hundred well that you're very annoying, but that I also really really love you

He has to ruin it. He cannot do it. No, you said both things. So I was scared. I know you, but I don't know why. What do I do to annoy you? Oh, Lord, who do you want to actually start the list? You.

Start the list. We're not going to do. No, because you can't come up with anything. It's your 100th birthday. I think you'd be very positive. I got to do it. I really feel hundredth birthday. I think it should be very positive. You know, I really feel like a hundred and fifty, no. Yeah. You know, by the way, one of the great things, and I would keep this up if I were you. I would start adding a lot of years when people ask you your how old you are. So

how good I look. Yeah, it really works. I did it to a friend of mine as a joke. Yeah, I would tell friends of mine that my friend who was like 40, I bet he's like 57 and they were like, Jesus, you're 50. Like everybody who met him was just complimenting and it exists for anybody. So I have done it before. You have? Yes.

It's good. It's like when people learn that you speak Chinese and then they hear you speak English. They're like, wow, your English is really good. You know, because we've done that a few times. Right, yeah. I just think I've done that year, year, year, wow, your English is really good. You know, because we've done that a few times. Right. Yeah. I just kind of done that.

It wasn't my 40s. Yeah. And my nephew asked me how old I was. And I told him about 56. He says, you are? Yeah. So you are older than my mother. I can't believe her.

Good to look. Yeah. Yeah. Because the truth, okay, the truth is, how are you turning? 100. Tell the truth. Okay, the truth is how are you turning? 100 Tell the people 99 Tell the people I did Tell the people that you don't be gross. This is a nice show. You're honoring me. This is not

No I was going to talk about my grandkids. No, I was talking about the grandkids. Okay. Because that was so... Oh yeah, it was a good transition. Let's talk about the grandkids. Yeah. No, because it was so unbelievable.

But honestly, I didn't think I was going to cry in this trip, but they really broke me into tears. Yeah. Also, you're thinking that we've been training them to be rude to you all this time, and then... No. I've seen it because I annoy you to hell. The kids know it, and I said, gosh, why do I have to? I gotta tell you something.

I thought something was wrong with him when how happy he was to see you. Cause he's never been felt like that. And then what happened was we were in the car and he goes, I wish I could be home right now to hang out with grandma. And I almost pulled over, I go, what the hell are you talking about?

And he's like, he goes, he goes, I wish I could hang out with grandma. And I go, I go, I slow down, I go, are you hell are you talking about? And he goes, I wish I could hang out with grandma. And I go, I slow down, I go, are you excited that she's here? And he goes, hell yeah. And I go, why? Because miracles happen. Yeah, and this is a real flip for him.

And this is just a natural one. Because he ran, he ran to me, hacked me, kissed me. I said, honestly, you can know us for a better moment. Have you been giving him candy? Yeah, what have you been doing? I told him, cut the shit. Tell me the truth what's going on.

And he's just like, I'm really excited to see her. Yeah, I give him love. That's so weird. I give him love. It's a word that you are not very familiar, but it works. It works. It's all I do.

Now, one of the things, you know, you're also, let me be refresh everybody's memory. You're very famous here. Why do you find this? Hold on. Oh God. You told me that we have missed out on some top tier farts because you don't think they're gonna be big and then they break records. Don't do this.

Don't do what? This stupid thing that you are doing right now. Why? Why? I don't want to talk about that. Mom, that's what everybody was talking about. That's true. I don't know, fartmystress.com.

We still have it for you. Do we still have fartmystress.com? Yeah. When are you gonna start giving the people a thing? Do you have any grandmothers in your age group have websites dedicated to them for this? Can you pull up fartmystress.com? You know, I am though the interest

in themystress.com. Parties. But you're leaving money on the table with every fart you just let go. Go to waste. Oh my gosh. You know how much money you can make on your farts now? Can I make money in a different way

that there's no farting? Not really. I mean, what skills do you have? I can talk. Okay. We've all heard that. We wanna hear the instrument that you play that not everybody knows how.

You're a master. There's people that study instruments. You're the terminal human-like me here. Not at all. You're honoring me. He spent a fortune. This cost almost a million dollars to get you on Orlando news. And then you took a moment for it. Yeah, we almost sent them that clip. And then we were like, oh, they're not going to play it. So what was the point? You know, this is so embarrassing.

First you honor me and then you talk about when am I going to make money by for you? You bragged you bragged When you got to the house you're like I have fortunately I have a problem with that I don't problem. I don't I don't brag about it. I a problem or a gift Interesting a problem, okay, if you want that a gift If you need to go to a doctor because of that, that's not a colleague gift.

You go to a doctor because you have a problem. Why do you think you have such powerful parts? Yeah. What's your theory? Because my dad used to say, oh, I can tell you exactly what causes that kind of fart. Oh my God. That's his point. Yeah.

Okay. They're in Los Artis. They have their long intestines are actually longer. Okay. All right. And so your mother and her sister, you have, and they have very long gas times, all right? That actually, yeah, the doctor told me that they have extremely large intestine and it's all you know, you're talking about, yeah. I asked Canberlija, you know, in many ways you could say that's why you're perfect pairings.

I mean, you had the fart mistress with the fart interpreter. And you guys were like, that's probably what was the glue to the marines. So that's what we love so much. Yeah. But do you think it has to do with your diet? You've had a lot of changes in your diet recently. You're informing now, every time you come into town, I make sure to stock the house with treats that she likes. Starburst candies. You eat

those before bed. Crazy. Yeah. Punnetone and white wine. No more to go. Also with my go we talked and I said, how about daily walks and you know that and then you're like, I'm definitely gonna do this. What you wait, wait until you see me next time. And then yesterday you go, if I don't start moving, I'm definitely going to do this. Wait, wait until you see me next time. And then yesterday you go, if I don't start moving, I can't tell you what's going to happen. That's all that is true. Yeah.

What do you think keeps you from actually doing that? I have no idea, but I'm getting worse and worse. I lost the desire. So I sit in my couch, which every time you call, you see me in the same couch. And when I walk, it's the kitchen, to get a coffee, a cup of buck. So it's very sad.

And my diet is getting worse and worse. What did you have for breakfast today? Let's go. Let's go there. I had two coffees and two croissants. No, one and a half. I do, I see this is where I get it from. My mother loves croissants.

I love croissants. See? But I'm trying to abstain, you know? No, you are just a very healthy human being. No. Who did you get it from? My mom, my mother. I wish I can imitate you in one of those things.

For me, I'm not getting you. Hmm. You can do it. Everything that I'm doing, you can do. And that anyone's like, what do you mean? You can't go for a daily walks. Why not? I can't I fall with You fall if I walk I fall because I haven't worked for so long

I'm not kidding. I'll take you for a walk when we get home today Okay, you walk with me. I will walk with you for a little bit. I cannot walk. You don't understand. Okay. How long can we walk for two blocks? two blocks. Yes blocks? Yes. You can ask him. He does everything she can to make me do something. And then what do you say, you're like, I'm just standing, talking. I'm gonna try, I'm gonna try.

Whereby, time I get from my room to the front door. I'm tired. Maybe it's because of the carbohydrate and sugar diet. For a while. Maybe if you add some protein, do you think that might help with the... What's that? Mm-hmm. Just so you know, we are celebrating your 100th birthday.

Yes. This Sunday and we're gonna have food brought into the house and... Not my food. Well, nothing but your favorites. And I asked Jane what does Charles love to eat more than anything? You know what she said?

She can... Chicken nuggets and french fries. So we're gonna have your birthday catered like a toddler. Mm-hmm. Yep. And by the way, Christina knew this. She goes, I'm having somebody prepare for the house. You're like, I go, what are you gonna have?

She goes, like, toddler food, like nuggets, and I go, I go, maybe double check with Jane. And Jane was like, no no you nailed it 100% that's right I think this is if you want to give me a better dinner you cannot do it this is a birthday celebration you know when we were in Hawaii one of your favorite subjects remember New Year's New Year's even Hawaii can we show this yeah do you remember Hawaii? I remember this. Yes.

But remember, we went to a lovely buffet for New Year's Eve. Oh my God. And it was like seafood and tell me. Oh my God. You just said it the way my father would say it. Yeah. It was so wrong. It was disgusting.

I'm going to the buffet. What is a buffet? Yeah. And she would eat anything. And it was like the crab legs And then we went to the kids camp Don't forget my birthday And she had the toddler food at the place three star Michelin restaurant where she was like

To Ryan yeah, yeah Everything that was like a once in a lifetime Everything yeah, yeah, it was like a once in a lifetime I was literal once in a lifetime meal people fly to Chicago to eat it was so special Wait and every course had like a story. Yeah, and like they light it on fire or something And she's like then you're like are there birds chirping in here? And it was a show that I will never forget yeah, I show that they hold time I suffer thinking how much is he's been in post this show list. We pull up the show list. Yeah, so what is the show? No, no, no, I'm just getting something ready for you. So since you're not motivated

to do things, I have a motivational clip for you. Okay. If you get a set of nuts, regardless of your gender, stand up. You're going gonna die anyway someday, all of you. In the son of a bitch, you're gonna get off the little planet alive, okay? I'm not gonna die on my knees, fuck that, okay? And I'm not gonna die like all those guys in the orange suits that are on a beach, shot in the back of the head. Fuck that, jump up, kick somebody in the balls,

head butt the motherfucker, break his nose, okay? Do something, okay? Look like, really? No. I like this. Yeah, okay, but like, oh, really? No. I like this. Yeah. I mean, we play it for you. Yeah.

Well, that's what he's saying, do something. Okay, if no, I'm gonna start doing it. Okay, what are you gonna do? I'm gonna work with you today. Okay, two, three blocks. Well, it was going to be two now, it was going to be three. Okay. That's a lot.

You don't believe me when I come back. I do not believe you. You're correct. I do not believe you. I am out of breath. Yeah. I have every type of problem. I have osteoporosis. I have what is it called? Escoledosis. I have some other problems I don't want to mention. Okay. But God wants me alive. He wants me here for the purpose. It's not exactly to say bad words, but I determine to do something

as a gratitude for what He has granted. What will you do? Walk. Walk, okay. I like it. I'm ready. I can't wait. I promise I'm gonna do it.

I will start today. Okay. We find the coolest guys. Yeah. This is one of the guys we found online. These are, yeah. And we're friends with them and they come over and hang out.

This guy was on the show a while ago, check this out. Justin, I really like your videos and I hope you continue to do them. And me being blind, please, I'd appreciate you. Doing them to where I can hear and, you know, I'd appreciate you doing them to where I can hear and you know, I'd like you to turn the recorder on when you go into the bathroom and let me hear you undo your bell, pull your pants down, set the toilet seat down, sit down and do a good stream of pee in the water and a good shit. I'm not even talking to someone. This guy we found is a funny mine.

So he likes, he's blind. I can see, I enjoy just being pooping. Yeah, he wants to know the story, like what you ate, why it sounds like, because he can't see. So he wants to. You don't need the inspiration is being poop. But he does, he gets to enjoy the sounds. That's the, you know what I'm saying?

So I've sent him recordings of me going to the bathroom and I don't mean anything. There's a thing. This is so sick. Well, okay. He, he also, that's not funny at all. Don't keep telling me more about this fascinating guys

that you find and you like. This is it. Hi, I hope you get this video response. The guy that did the shitting and gave the description of a shit. I would love to talk to him here from on the channel. I was talking to, like, to, uh, Christina, have you allowed some more videos of him taking a shit? I've lined.

Just like the show. I'll tell you what we connected. I'll tell you what we connected. Yeah, but you're doing a show with me and showing me this is castescent. It's not part of my show. I'm telling you why we connected. Why? Because he shed and you like it. So, no, he wanted to hear videos of guys taking big shit and stuff. So I sent them to him and then you're going to meet him on Monday because he also loves aviation. So I've been taking those flying lessons. So he's a pilot. He's blind, he can't fly.

But he loves being around aviation and shitting. So I sent him videos of me on the toilet and then I sent him videos of me flying. But he gives him free flying hours. So I take him up sometimes. He gave you a free flying hour. No, no, no, no, no. So he owns one of the hangars there.

So he loves being around aircrafts and stuff, and he can't fly, but he likes to be, he can't pilot. But he give you a plane to fly. He doesn't give me the plane. Some of the aircraft are housed in a building he owns. So that's why he got around aviation, you know. Trying to find a friend on YouTube here that would understand and would be willing to share.

I always have enjoyed poop humor and I like it. And that was really a great video. Thank you. So I hope you get this. My name is Bob. You can reach me at home. I live alone and always looking for someone to talk to and making new friends. Great guy. I was so excited because I can't read the information on the screen. So it speaks to me. It's a program called window eyes and it's really neat. So if you

Would you talk to him talk to me and get to know me a little bit? He took a little bit of a clean or a Yeah, no, yeah, as an interesting person as a blind person. I'm a school teacher. I'm a amateur ham operator So I'm active in a lot of things. I'm a church. So he's in the church too. He's in the church So, point he needs a fringe. Okay, the church. So, he's in the church too. He's in the church. So, exploring, he needs a fringe. Okay, the real way that we actually really met was when your fart video went viral. So, he did a video about how much he loved that video. He's like, I wish he was taking a shit.

And then I was like, hey, that's my mom. And he goes, do you think she would make me videos? And I was like, probably not. Can't you imagine? And so, then I was like, I'll make a video. and he goes, do you think she would make me videos? And I was like, probably not. Can't you match you? And so then I was like, I'll make a video. So I made videos of me going to the bathroom. I give you a roll. Don't air the show, huh?

This is so disgusting. The video, Anthony, shit. The whole thing we're talking is on. On, here's the thing. So this guy, this was a, I thought it was interesting. It's not fun. It was really great on that.

Listen though. The name is Bob. I wouldn't mind you doing some more videos like that and sending them to my channel. I like that kind of humor. It was fun. It was fun. I'm really happy he is.

He's on here. There's too much clutter and noise and stuff like that. He's making a blind guy happy. I'd be interested to know what you were showing in the picture since I'm a blind person. So anyway, So this show is about this guy. Why am I here?

No, no, no, no, no, I got some more stuff to show you. No, this is disgusting. Why? No, I feel sad for a blind guy. And I admire him for keeping his spirit, but all she's talking about how much he enjoys somebody and how what that's he feels. Well, here's the thing, I think you're going to change your mind on Monday when you meet him.

He's a really good guy. And he talk clean or the whole thing is what he's like. Oh no, he'll talk to you very nice. Maybe he can. And he'll probably ask me like what she please record herself going to the bathroom for me. But you know, you don't have to do that obviously. You know, feel like unless you like him, he's really sweet. I've done a few bathroom for me. But you don't have to do that obviously. You feel like it unless you like him.

He's really sweet. I've done a few piece for him and he loves it. He loves it. Can we go from here? Yes. No, you don't know what I'm going to say. Oh, okay. Can we go to the Apple store and buy me an iPad Pro 15?

For what? But what are you doing on there? Sounds official. Yes, well, it's like a referee with a whistle. Hmm. Can we please do that because my eye But it stopped working and I work and what do you do on there? Oh my god, I'm a fool. The Jules number one. I play bridge online. Oh, oh, I'm stuck Cam and I saw it's an emergency. What do you think of this guy? What do you think? I'm where are you gonna get this?

Over here. Never in the US, say all of your goals. I can be able to show you what this is. What is wrong with you? Can you please just watch? But why are you inviting me to this? This is not the guy that's tired of me. No, this is nothing to do with poop or pee. Yeah, I promise.

Here we go. Nice guy. Where are you gonna get this? Over here, never in the US, say all of me a more. All out. Love Colombia. Do you remember that guy? He even seen him since my wedding.

That's my dad. That's not your dad. That's him. And he's not your dad. Okay, guys, I had to take the short video. This is what he's trying to do. Huh? No, no.

Just break. This guy can't take it alone, but my own. Yeah Nice right What is wrong with you. I mean why are we doing this is to show people what Colombia is like This guy's down there just meeting people like telling people what it's like on tourism We're trying to help the economy of Colombia. Yeah, it's pretty good. Like that. Well, yeah. Guys go down there and spend money.

They like this really funny. Another night in Colombia. Why does this is so you would go live? I'd love my life. You really help me in the coming Colombia now. Say, I love Colombia. I am loving life, guys. This is Colombia.

This one don't understand English. That's your name, English. Now English? No. Who's that guy, yeah? He's one of the coolest guys. He's from New York and he goes down to Medezeen often and then he posts stuff like this and like tells people about what it's like down there And then he visits his grandkids every now and then two so that's kind of nice you get to see like that side of him

So he gets older hookers and then he goes Yeah, what a nice guy What a nice guy. So far, this is the most inspirational show I have watched. Now, I got a wild one that you're not ready for, but I want you to... Wars on this? Well, it's kind of different. I don't want to watch it, huh? No, no.

No, no. I don't see his fair. Here's what I'll tell you. Here's what I'll tell you. No, but don't, I don't see his fair that you bring me here to show me all these farts on this. Well, what do you want to talk about? Yeah, what do you want to talk about?

Talk about life. Okay. Have you been to Colombia? I went to Colombia when I was in my 20s. Mm-hmm. What city? Bogota. And I went for two days and I spent 13.

13 days? Oh. And in the meantime, I didn't tell anybody in the house. What? And my poor my send the FBI were looking for me. Oh my God. Really? Oh, this is true. She never find out that she was. What did she think happened? I told her I couldn't get a fly. I was working in an airline company. So we went with a friend because we got two, three tickets to go to New Years and you know since happening you meet somebody. Did you meet a guy like this? No I met a really guy, a French guy that was really hot. Really? I've never heard

this before. I've never heard this either. Dude you could have been half French. Wow. Wait so what was his book perfect Spanish? What? And I had a crush on him the second I saw him. Wait, so what was his name? His book, Perfect Spanish. What? And I had a crush on him the second I saw him. Really? How old was he? For like six years older than me, maybe seven? I don't know. He was like,

a love it here in Colombia. For exteriors. He was so much fan here in Colombia. I have $10. No, he, do you know this is the Spanish curry? We were sitting in a Colombia. That's $10. No, you know this is the funniest hurry. We were sitting in a hotel. This is really funny.

Yeah. With his friends sitting in a hotel outside because a couple of friends were coming to pick us up. And this is friends, she knew from whatever. As we were sitting, she says, turn around, look, who's coming. And I turn around because I was not facing the front. And there were two guys with two ladies coming. Y ella se quedó en la cara y se quedó en la cara, porque no estaba en la cara. Y eran dos, dos niños, y uno de ellos era literalmente movilista. Entonces se quedó en la cara y se quedó en la cara.

¿Qué haces? Y ella se quedó en la cara y se quedó en la cara. Y luego lo ofreía a él, se quedó a nosotros y las personas. ¿Cómo? ¿Tú lo doyas algo? No es un medio, se introduzó a él, y él estaba en la cara. and all of a sudden they came to us and he said, hello, are you doing something tonight? Nice to meet you and introduce yourself. And I was like shaking when you were that young. So anyway, they invite us to dinner with these ladies. And I said to my wife, we have to go.

We went to our room and she called her friend and they had a horrible stomach ache. So to please don't come because I was going to rest. So, he called her back and he says, I'm coming bring her some medicine. What kind of pain does she has? She says, no, she wants to be in a dark room with a door close to please don't come. We didn't know what to say. That's how rude we were.

Yeah. So, we went out with these guys and the ladies. How are you at the time? Like how? Probably 22. Oh, you're very young. Okay and So anyway, they end up in this garrison after dinner they invite us to dance and Love happens. Wow. So he says when I do you leaving us a tomorrow? Oh, no, you cannot leave to

I had $50 and a carry on. No carry on. Those things are occurring at that time. Remember when you make up an underwear and toothbrush. And he said, I lane you the man who is there, no other night. And like that, with the annoying night and annoying night. Wow.

And I just ignore my work, my family, my poor mother. You're just boning a French guy for a week. She was boning me. I wasn't boning him. I said boning. Boning. No, none of that. A lot of kissing, but not that stupid stuff.

Not that stupid stuff. This is 1931, 32. I don't know, but that's the time when the people love you. Yeah. And they don't necessarily need to do that, but you hook up. You have a great time. Yeah. I'm sure he enjoyed this part of my body.

Oh my God. No, no seeing it. Touching it. Touching your big honkers. No seeing it. He was touching your honkers. Honkers. Yeah, your honkers, your milk duds.

I don't know. He probably touched it. I can't remember now. Yeah, but he was probably like, hey, can you put some extra milk in my. No, he probably touched it. I can't remember now. Yeah, but he was probably like, hey, he puts an extra milk in my eyes. I made it so funny, but we came back. I say, we came back. Yeah. He's French, though.

My friend called her father from the payphone at the airport. And he goes, papito, he hung up the phone with her. Her dad did. Her dad did. And she said, now what do I do? My father hung up the phone. So let's take a taxi go to my house. We didn't have a penny. Right. So we went to the house and I trained the door and we live with my mother and my family. But I met you lucho that we live with. Open the door furious

at me. Where have you always been? Yeah, and my mind was behind and she went oh Thank you guys in the middle of the floor. She's saying that you're dead I might saw something happening. Yeah, so for her who cares what happened as long as I'm dead and safe And so I asked for money to pay the taxi yeah, and then Maya hid in the bathroom because her father was coming. And she started laughing like crazy. And she says, no, what do I do? I said, stop laughing.

So she hid in the bathroom. I opened the door. And Maya, you could hear her laugh because she was hysterical laughing. And I said, please don't get mad at Maya. I said, can you hear how she's crying? She's crying hysterically. I in the ear upset at her. Please don't put your ear, she says, okay.

But what happened? And I said, we couldn't get a fly because we get three tickets and the flies were full. And he said, we couldn't do a scene message. He said, we didn't have a way to see the message. He said, how about to go to the airline company and see the message? You guys say 13 days? Jesus. Yeah, these French guys must have been really something. You only went to first base. That's impressive. Those French guys are very

aggressive. Your frog and you said he was a movie star. Did she have another frog? She didn't like him, but she stayed for me. For you? That's a real friend. She's like, I'll take this. So why did you keep in touch with Pierre? Or did what happened? What happened? What? What? Yes. So there was no chance of anything?

Yes. And the minute I arrived in Lima, I didn't like him. What? I know what this is. This is vacation vibes. Yeah. You're a certain environment. You're like, this is great.

And then you leave the environment. It's so true. The romance is gone. Oh my God. It's not exciting. Oh, yeah. So I knew where he works because he gave me all the, sure. I took money from my salary and I went to his office

and he went like open arms and I like, wow. That's very, that's very youthful to do that stuff. Isn't that weird? No, I think it actually makes, I think it's actually very relatable. Because there's things where like when you're on vacation, you go like, it's like it's the environment and then you leave the environment.

And also what was that? And also you're young, you're very young. Yes, it happens. Now more importantly, what's your pronoun? Now, didn't you say that you were at the doctor or the hospital? I saved this. I didn't tell Christina because like, you have to say it's on the show. And they were like, what was your birth?

What's your gender? Oh my gosh. I went to a doctor's office and they gave me a paper to fill up. Okay, name. And they gave my name. Sex, female. Meester or meces or whatever, Mrs. what was your date of birth? And so when you were born, what gender were you born?

And I said, woman, how would you like to be called by my name? And sex, I said, I already say it, female it This is at the doctors of this Maybe I should say it but because I have the new thing Yeah, yeah, yeah, so why is it? No, this is ridiculous, it's too much Yeah, it's just silly It looks like a fucking boy Okay, now

Do you, have you ever felt like a man? Have you ever felt like maybe you could be a pronoun changer? Like, I'll tell you. Not even close. Really? But I did have a woman who liked me. Who?

Oh, I don't know them. You don't know them? Just because one time we went to a casino with Jang, I think you were there to me. Remember? Yeah. And I went downstairs to get a coffee or a coke or something in the bar And there was a woman we had big boobs trying to make it pass on me. Wow

There's a lady in LA who cut your hair that liked you. Oh my god. She shaved my hair. Yeah, and then dad was so entertained I didn't my hair dad was very not happy That was you walked up the drive will never forget I'm standing in my position. And he goes, oh shit. Yeah. That's exactly how you go. What he goes? Your mom looks like a I know. She literally don't you remember? And she sent me there. Yeah, I don't. Don't you dare. Oh no. Oh no. I wanted you to go to Alan Martinez

You do me that and you left long as stop as she was cutting my hair I'm looking at you from the mirror. I Holding the dog not negative. I wanted you to see Alan my guy I've been going to for 20 some years You see now, but you didn't want to I think either wait for the appointment That was it wasn't available That is true you went to the second option because the top option was not available

at the moment you wanted it. You're like, I wanna do it now. I know, I have a change. Yeah, and then we went down this tree to a gage because we lived in a gang neighborhood in Silver Lake. And this lesbian loved your mom. She did, yeah. But we became a couple.

So I had to have my head in my head. No, the best part is she gave your mother her haircut. Yeah. I remember I remember when you walked up, I was like, why not? She keep cutting on cutting. No, I like keep looking at Christina from the mirror. She's laughing so much.

I was laughing the whole time. I was dying. And then the best part is like, you know, when you get a bad haircut and you're already like, just get me out of here. Yeah. Let me get home so that I can style it better. Maybe I can salvage the best part is like, we already know that I can style it better. Maybe I can salvage.

The best part is like, we already know that hair cut is doomed. It's already a disaster. And then she's, she's fashioning it into a foe hawk. What is it? What is it? A foe hawk on your mother. And I was dying at home.

You know, Cristina and I have the time off her life. I was so for her. Laughing so hard. It sounds funny. Because to look on your mother's face, the look on Charo's face when the woman was like styling and doing a mock. I think she was like my mirror is facing Christina behind just having fun. Yeah. Pending a detailed look and he be meeing his

crew. That was her show. And I pay for that. I remember. And we have a big cut goodbye that she loved. Yeah, you also had a you also had a haircut recently because Jane told me she's like yeah She just like gave herself a haircut Then you say you you also Cut you got your haircut by somebody who you're like she doesn't like when the lights are on like in her in her apartment She's like I don't like what's right in here And you're like it's all screwed up. You're like, yeah, the lights are on. The only thing that's left for her is literally truth.

Yeah. I really like her. Yeah. And I won't change her. Yeah. But it's a change that I cannot see. And I ask her, the other day she says, next time, you're going to see the difference.

It's a, but I can't see better without the light. I said, but I don't see what you're doing. Without the light for a haircut. Isn't this a good haircut? No, you look good. Now, last time you were here, you were, everybody went crazy. And there were memes made about you. You know what those are?

Internet memes will look up here on the screen. People made these. This is, I'm a chicken farmer, every time I see a char. Oh, they make fun of me. Yeah, this is, because you had different hair last time, you remember? So this is, this is char.

This is char. I have to take this thing off. Can you give me, seems like Jordan no no no I can see without it No, I look like a doctor or like a grandmother. Yeah, so they said this is this is you. I got chicken family. That's a charo That's all men Charo rack 10 milligrams milligrams and shit takes 20 milligrams. This is this is all more than me today. I'm not there.

They the fart mister. Yeah, because that was your hair. So now that you look at you on the last one, that's you last time. And then you go, oh, yeah, that's pretty accurate. How do I look now? I think it's so much better. Yeah, no, you look great and she said you look better.

I can't do it. You just can't stop looking about Hawaii. I can't. Oh my God. How did you get this in? People make this so they all made this about you, Chara. Oh my God. We're talking about her trip to Hawaii.

I was talking about Hawaii. We're talking about Hawaii. I was talking about Hawaii. I'm not about Hawaii. I was talking about Hawaii. I'm not talking about Hawaii in it. I told you. Is that how my hair was really, eh? Yeah, that's a photo of you. Yes.

That's you. And why didn't you correct me in that? Correct you. Correct you. This is me. I tell me do something. You hear, you look retarded. What?

As horrendous. No wonder where they make fun of me. Yeah. No. They call me, what is the bird? Big bird. Big bird, yeah. Yeah.

That's okay. They call me Nespreche. This is how hairy my butt is right now. This is a real... I know. No, no, no. This is like a... I sketch a picture. This is a YouTube video.

It's on YouTube. Well, I don't accept this. I don't... I do not put it in my show. I's on YouTube. I don't accept this I don't I don't you can put it in my show I can not accept that no Absolutely, it's a shaving video You don't know how Nair works there. Don't me please don't put that in my show No don't invite me and put it stuff like that. No, no Have you ever removed hair from your body using Nair the product Nair?

This is a hair removal video. It's not what you think it is. It's on YouTube. You can watch it on YouTube, but you cannot clean it. And it shows that you're inviting. Well, I'm supposed to show. But it's an educational stuff. We're allowed to show educational stuff. This is the old.

No, the new education, I am not here to educate anybody. But it's just a bit of a hair removal video. Yeah, well, yeah, then remove your hair and use, no, this is just a hair removal. No, no, no. But how do you know how it works? You don't know how it works. I don't get how it works. Remove it, please.

But you don't know. He's going to do, he's going to remove it. Remove this clip. Oh. Please. No, but some respect. I mean, you know, no, no, no, no. You don't want to know about hair removal?

No, yeah, that's as slow as it goes. No, I think you know. Nobody knows how that denares. What I'm cares, I knows how the tenures run. Yes, another one will watch a show about how many videos does this have? Like 45 million. Oh my gosh. Yes, I need 46 million.

He got enough. Remove it. Do you really don't want to see this? 800% no. So it's disgusting to extreme. He also has, okay. Why can't you become so dirty? What is the need of this? What? It's not it's an education. I swear to God. Hand to God. It's an educational video. It's on YouTube.

It's just to remove hair from your body. It's not dirty. He has a trimming his balls. Can we talk about how I know? Please, this is yes. How about he has had to use a butt plug? Please, this is yes. How about he has had to use a butt plug? Do you know what that is? I don't even know how it is. How to finger your butt, you gotta trim your nails and everything when you put fingers in your putto. I don't mean, please.

Okay, all right, geez, I can do it. Have some respect for your mother. I do respect, I'm just trying to like... Oh, I think you're taking me directly to the Apple Store now store now it's not request stomach hurts Please teen please what you need the way into this I'm the palette cleanser

How it cleanser And his head Wow He's mad he crashed So he's screwing his own car? Yeah, because he's embarrassed I think too You know what to say? Where? Apple store? No. People him? Where? Apple store?

No. People like me go to Apple store. He go to an institution. Oh, you think this guy needs to be institutionalized? Well, of course, I mean. Do you think I'm only going to have a crush and destroy my car more because I crush it? Yeah, he got very emotional there. By the way, I want Christina's car.

Very nice. So you make two lists. Okay. Today the Apple Store. Now we have something ready? No grotesque. Not but whole hair. Do you want to see how the impressive part of how it looks at the end after the nail? Absolutely. No, but it's just skin. But it was a bunch of hair. I have to see it. I have to see it. Interesting Christina But it was a bunch of hair. I have to see I have so interesting this thing, but it was a bunch of hair No, absolutely no, but now and now there's no hair You've never done waxing. No, don't you want to see how clean and smooth he looks? No, you can watch a 50. No, let's just see

Okay, look at this is how my butt looks pre-rends and pre-shower and post I am This is how my butt looks pre-rends and pre-shower and post I am very close with the cream I am only half as in the mirror I am half the mirror and come back and show you what the results are Alright guys, I'm back for my shower, did my nighttime skin care This is how my butt looks post-shower Just look, look Clean

Post hair, sorry, no cream There's no hair now No, no, it's a bad Why do I want to be in your show watching a bad? It's a little Asian guy. It's practically a woman. I watch romantic shows. Obviously there are some hairs on my cheeks. Can you put something in here? Let's talk about something else. All right. Okay. Did you ever wax your stuff down there or shave? Do you know? Yes, I shave. Yeah, I shave. I'm a shaver. I'm not a waxer. I'm afraid to.

I heard it because of Jay. By the way, really? I never forget that. Yeah. And that my dad was really heartbroken. I'd send phone. He was really. I was taking a shower. I can't first time she walking the shower. And she's from there. And she said, that's disgusting. And I said, what? How can you have her there? And I said, what? I said, man, men don't like that. You have to shame it in me at everything.

So I saw that one. It's just like the gaze. Okay. So... Like the gaze. Yeah, the gaze. The gaze shows a lot. And they shave a lot, yeah. How do you know you have watched them?

We're just watching them together. Yeah, guys, yeah. You go watch the gaze. We just watch one together. The gaze trim their hair. Yeah, yeah. You go watch Gaze. Shades. We just watch one together. The Gaze trim their hair. Oh. Yeah.

This conversation is going through. Okay, now it's time for, is this hilarious? Or what? Or horrible? Okay, is this kind of their deal? No, no, it's clean. Ready? Here's no assholes.

Okay, here we go. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Okay, here we go. Ah! I get wrong! Oh my God. Oh my God.

Hello, are you or not? Absolutely terrible. Yeah, that was bad. That was a dumb question. I thought it was funny how they all fell down after and that was kind of funny the way that it fell into the other humans. But the bus hitting them was not cool.

Well, they should have known the bus was coming. He was out of the bike lane to be fair. That's what happens. That's what happens. Yeah, let us see it again. So, see how this guy, the bike lane is to the left for where that line is. Yeah.

And look at that guy on the right, on the far right, he's riding in the street. Yeah, and he's out of balance. So the bus is basically saying like, he's giving him a nudge. Like, hey buddy, you know, just to move over, just to move. So the bus, yeah, the bus just gives him a little wink. Yeah, I think the bus could move a little bit more

to those. But he's more of a love tap, you know, just, I get wrong. I. All right, so there's no laughs on that one. I like to Tom, I thought that was hilarious. I liked watching them all fall after him, you know, like a domino. So for you, it's fun to be funny.

Just that time, just that time. Yeah. Let's see this next one. Let's see if we get some LOLs on this one. Ah! All right. Wait, wait, wait wait look He's okay Yeah, he's okay. Why are you run away? I think he stole it. Oh, yeah, I think he stole it. Yeah

Damn pretty cool. Yeah, Yeah. Pretty cool. Yeah. That is pretty cool. See you like that one. Yeah. I mean, if he's perfectly fine, he's totally a bike and he took off and nothing happened. Yeah. But he survived. That's cool.

Alright, we're, uh, one out of two. I know, no, no, no. It's okay. Look, he's okay. He's okay. He's totally fine. I know, no, no, no! It's okay, look, he's okay, he's okay, he's totally fine. I like your roar! He just got up like nothing happened, that was crazy. He's like a big U-Lie. And we checked on him and he's okay, he's fine.

How did you check on him? Because the video was sent in and we were able to reply. And then, he's absolutely fine. He's totally fine. Barely a scratch. Barely a scratch. I'm even that big of a deal. Looks like he crashed that windshield pretty hard,

but other than that, yeah. Also, you have to give him credit for how many times he flipped. That was amazing. It was like gumby though, he just bounced. Yeah, I mean, this is a little... He's long and lean too. I think we have that. Dang, dang, like a rag doll. Yeah, and look at pop right up. Yeah, he didn't even break his own shit

No, it's real that's real. Yeah, it's real dude. He just like You would run after that even break. I think that's the motivation you need. Okay, let's see if we got another one. Thanks to some, see if we can get some giggles at you. Did you hear a fart? Yeah, he farted. He farted. yeah, listen. I don't know, you guys have the capacity to hear it fart in a minute. It's pretty what? That was a noise from falling into pieces. No, that's a fart. Oh, yes, I guess. Yeah, I was super. Yeah, it was a

super. It was a super. Yeah, that was disgusting. Yeah, he also has, you know, he's deeply traumatized, you know, his insides are, his legs are. He probably tore his hamstrings, some of his joints snapped in half. Yeah. And when you do your comedy, so to like this, the stand up, yeah, it's very similar. Yeah. So everything is dirty and soupy and soupy.

It's a lot of soupy, far from the stand up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He said that how do you feel when you watch that? How do I feel? Yeah. You can't feel about that.

I didn't realize that he was partying, so I was feeling sorry for him. Yeah. Until Tommy made me notice the thing. I went from sad to, because it was like a wasted fart that nobody heard. Really? No. No. Because he was sad that the guy fell down and he carried like this.

Oh, you guys are infasized what is not important. I know. I mean, I think it's the most important part. It's big shot. It's getting it for fart. It was a good fart. We do have a good ear for farts. Yeah.

But it was a really good fart and it went to waste. I don't even think his friends heard it. Yeah. I guess that's kind of a bummer, you know? No, you're gift, no. Mom, do you want to see inmate penpal videos or daddy to Marco? No, two pen pals. You do pen pals?

Two pen pals. I don't even know what it is. Do you, are you looking for love? Are you single? You can find quality guys that aren't gonna leave or cheat on you. That's what I like about these guys. I'm just saying if I were single again, this might be the pool that I would go to. Okay.

Nice dudes. And then once you watch the video I'm gonna ask you to guess something. Okay. Okay. Okay. Hi my name is Chris. I'm locked up in Idaho. My high-duck number is ****. I'm looking for some pin pals to write write and share what I got with which is plenty full I'm an entrepreneur slash artist been doing it for a long time Really hope to hear from somebody We'll be posted on Business guy he does his own businesses. He's an entrance. This is a guy. Would you date him? Would you take it would you go guy. Would you date him?

Would you go out on a date with him? That's not for a day he's in jail. Well, that's he's trying to connect with people. Do somebody to talk to? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's a David to talk. Sure. Yeah.

Okay, what do you think he's locked up for? He's like, kill somebody. No. He said he's an entrepreneur. You got to get closer to your mic that you got to move your mic, okay? There we go. Okay, what's your guess?

You think somebody's a killer. You think somebody's a killer. I think he's a drug dealer. Entrepreneur drugs. Drogus. Drogus. Okay, Drogs, yeah. That's correct.

He's possession of controlled substance. Hey, you know, the more we watch these I feel like I'm getting better now. Yeah, because I've been practicing doing my name is Greg just thought I'd throw myself out here and see what's going on out there in the world. Looking for some good conversation or whatever if it goes further than that, whatever, if not, I don't know, I'm just looking to meet some cool people and. Okay, this is a little shape. Yeah, get me up. You think so? Oh my gosh, whatever, whatever, whatever, I got, no.

Okay. I would. I think Craigs' Illuser, a complete loser. Okay. He has no conversation whatsoever. Oh, you think his conversation skills are like, what would you like to have a conversation with somebody who says, hey, whatever, and I want to meet somebody,

whatever, I'm just looking at the world outside to see if somebody wants to talk or whatever. Yeah, he doesn't seem to be offering much. That's a nice, clean guy with zero IQ. Right, he doesn't have a lot of... He doesn't have anything to keep the price of. I'm gonna go for like robbery. Yeah.

What do you think he did? Okay, well, your instinct is right that he's a loser. Yeah. But that he didn't do anything is very wrong. You're kidding. He killed his own daughter. What? What? Yeah. Who's a baby? Seven-week-old daughter. Aye! Yeah. Yeah. He's a monster. He's a monster. Fuck. He's a monster but as he likes to say, whatever. Whatever. Wow. He's a monster, but as he likes to say, I've heard it. Whatever. Whatever. Wow, that is so nice.

It's for real? That's for real, yeah. Yeah. He killed his baby daughter, yeah. Dang. I hope they keep him there for life and never find a person to talk to. Yeah, yeah, he will.

But if you want to write him a letter, you know, Greg Rees, he's gonna serve him some time. He's gonna say, what's up or whatever. He's mine when we like write to him. Yeah, I think. But if you wanna write him a letter, Greg Rees is gonna serve him some time, he wanna say what's up or whatever. He's my one, will I write to him? Yeah, I think. He's so carefree. Yeah, he's very chill. I'm like, the guy is not a care in the world.

He doesn't have a heart. Well, yeah, there's a good chance that he has a personality disorder. A good chance, no. If you were capable of killing your own daughter and then go like this, so cool, like that. If you do something like that which is horrible you get so traumatized. Yeah. That's somebody have to try to lift you up to get out of the stupid it and horrible thing you did. Hey whatever I asked my fear. Yeah. Get out with the of having lane pipe for years. I like fat bitches, fat cars and tattoos.

And it feels probably for you. I have no idea what he's saying. So he said he's been like, he's good at sex. He's been giving it hard to women for years. And he likes fat bitches and fat cars. Ah. And if he feel like that, he might not be for you. Okay, he's a f**k, Purin.

He went to extreme of ins and body. And he just missing it and he wants more. Ah. Ah. That's exactly what he is. He went to extreme of somebody and he just missing it and he wants more. That's exactly where he is. And I'm writing that. This is one of the few where it doesn't have what he's in for actually. That's the reason I tell you. Oh my gosh. Hit him up on J-Payton. I feel like Christina would connect with this guy.

No, let me see it. I feel like you would like it. I like your sense of humor. I know. What did I tell you? What did I tell you? What did I tell you? What did I tell you? Can I tell you what I like is when the inmates come to the phone and they've got a little

rap. You know what I'm saying? He thought of, hey, what's up? I'm going to the fat bitches and they have something to say. The other guy was like, whatever, whatever. But this guy. She's like, he's got something to say. He came with a thought in his head.

And I really respect that about James. Respect that. Respect, yeah. Respect. Interesting choice of words. Yeah. I've been playing pipe for years. I was playing L.O.L.

I like that bitch. She's fast. Corgan. Corgan. And G.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L.L'd be awesome. He likes fab bitches. That's cool. The bar is very low for me to keep my weight down, which would be cool. Oh. Okay, ready?

He's very accepting. And then one more and we'll move on. From my name is Josh Wil-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B- My IDOC on JPE is f***ing. And honestly, I'm looking for that once in a lifetime that willy-wonk a golden ticket type of love. So if you think that could be you and we can make magic together, maybe I could be your doctor love. Let me know, baby. Ah, it's not sweet.

I like him. Yeah. He's like, they're a bit killer too. No, no, no. But I like him. You see your favorite out of all of the stories? Yes. Me too. Sweet. What's your guess? All right, I'm gonna go other. Is he your favorite out of all of this? Yes, yeah Me too sweet what's your guess?

All right, I'm gonna go Yeah, there's if there's a tear drop tattoo that implies that he's killed somebody's probably in a gang gang stuff Yeah, but you know what he has the charm now to do anything wrong and still he just I Like him my favorite your favorite. I think how many people do you kill? Well, he just, I like him. My favorite. Your favorite. My favorite. How many people do you kill? Well, he got a DUI. Oh, that's not true. But then he kills somebody during the DUI.

So he got, he got, he got, he got, he got a vehicle man. Man's got a key by accident, yeah. Yeah. So he's not a killer. Well, he is, but he's not an intentional killer. Well, he is because he was drunk. Right.

And then, unintentionallyally you got upset and poor Yeah, and I think their family would love to hear this explanation. Yeah, the victims would be like hey, it's not a bad guy Give them a break. It's fucking job. Do you know if you have drunk? That's the problem with drinking. Yeah exactly you can do a stupid stuff like that. Well enough, dude How about me about I get to play a little bit here? Hello Hey me up on. Thank you. Hi, hello. Hey, me up. On JPE. She's booty.

Yeah. All right. Okay, first of all, I love the minimalist. Right. It was just, what's up, hit me up and then a little hand sign. Yeah. I think I feel comfortable saying that I'm very intrigued. Yeah.

I like her physically. I like that she's not too much of a yapper. I hate yappers. Oh, I'm feeling this today. Shut the up. See, this is the difference between men and women. Like men only go for the looks first. So she knows that.

She's like, look, I'm a smoke show. That's the, I have to talk. I'm the hottest chicken Idaho. This is it. She look at me, at me, and that's, she's smart. You know that. She knows that. Yeah, she's a nailist know, maybe the Cristina, you're nail it. The other guys know to go for heartstrings.

Yeah. Well, she is incarcerated for burglary. She's still money and lottery tickets from a business. That, to me, is not even a criminal. Small potatoes, yeah. That's not a thing. Yeah. She's cool.

She's cool, I don't know. I welcome her into our thrupple, Tom. Well, I'd love for that to happen very soon. I know that Cristina likes Latin guys. You want more for her? I'd love for that to happen very soon. I know that Christina likes Latin guys You want more for her? Minimum is Luis, I go by Choco. Choco. So you want some of this? Hey, Choco, it's what's that? I just blame doesn't even have a muscle. You want some of this? Okay, what's that? Keep me in JP and I shoot you a pair. All right, take care of yourself, baby.

You probably made this. I put him into a set. You think so? I don't. Please. Look, I want some of this. And he showed you a damn like mine. Yeah, that's true. He wasn't very muscular. And you want some of this.

And you want some of this. And then you want this. And I don't know what is that. You don't like a man that can make your jewelry? He's making unacklasses instead. I thought you like jewelry. I loved your, but I don't need that man. I just wanted your jewelry.

Mm. So you're not a fan? Zero fan. I think Luis his eye contact was a very intense stare. Very intense. Very scared. Can you pull somebody can be attractive Latin guy that have something this guy have nothing? I actually feel sorry for him. He has his own skill. But listen, in prison, if you have a skill, you're gonna go far and he can make you necklaces. That's what he's showing you. This is my prison skill. And he's going to go from one room

to the next one in jail, that's all. Wow. Well, Luis is in for incarcerated for trafficking. Four and a half ounces of heroin. Got caught being found, passed out in a car during a lunch break. So he passed out and got his up. I know we bit a trouble.

Heron. Heron, four and a half ounces, it'll get you locked up. All right, one more. Hopefully this is the guy that you're looking for, mom. Here we go. Oh, my name is Vicente. Oh, hello. Hello, hello.

Hello, my name is Puffy. I just see I'm a hopeless romantic. It's not because I'm a little flirt, or maybe just because I'm just a little toxic. I don't know I ain't trying to get into all the details just yet. Yeah, I'm just focusing on putting a smile on your face making your laugh Smile on her face. Get to know me. Go ahead and hit me up on JP. Hey, but don't you worry. We'll get to that talk. You should later Oh god, what do you think about poppin? He come look I do know what was your mind? How can I like him? Oh, gosh. What do you think about puppet? I do know what was your mind? How can I like him?

Oh, okay, I don't know. He's just think and intoxicated, and I have no interest yet in being intoxicated, but he talks. No, toxic. Toxic. Toxic is not a, that's. No, no, no, no, no, he's like,

I have a bit of a toxic quality to it. You know what, it's good about him. He's self-aware. He's like, these are my bad qualities. I'm just letting you know. I have some bad qualities about me. He's like, these are my bad qualities. I'm just letting you know. I have some bad qualities about me. He's very aware. I like that about puppet.

He's honest. Yeah. I have no interest in improving. Well, there's some stuff that you're gonna have to deal with. That's what he's saying. Oh, no, thank you. Zero. Wow, you're so like, that's too much fun.

That's too much fun. I like the black kid at the beginning. Yeah. Yeah. That's my thing. You even were a good defense attorney. You're like, the guy's drunk. What do you mean, Frank black kid at the beginning. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's my thing. Yeah. Even we're a good defense attorney. Like the guy's drunk. What do you want him to drink? Boss the guys? Box River? Yeah. Drunk guy.

That was a big deal. That would be my guy. The risk. That would be my guy. A bunch of losers. Puppet. Yeah. What do you think a puppet did? I like a music gang banger. Obviously, because he's got the name puppet. He's just like in a gang. He's in like, Soranios or whatever fucking Mr. D. He's here. Let's not guess. Yeah. Um, what are you guessing the charge is mom?

And this one? Yeah. Rocks. Yeah, he a banger. All right, he is incarcerated for robbery and burglary. And then he threatened to the victim, pistol whip them, and stole their boots and money. That's nothing.

How are you not a defense attorney? He stole jewelry. Okay, let me read the whole thing again. Yeah. So you can clock in when you're ready for this. Yeah. Robbery and burglary. Yeah.

He then threatened the victim. Yeah. Pistol whip them. We have to threaten, didn't do anything. Right. The next sentence is he pistol whipped them. That means he... Threatened, didn't do anything. Okay, the next sentence is he pistol whipped them. That means you take a handgun and you hit somebody with the gun. Okay.

Okay, and then he stole their boots and money. That's many, many shoes. That's no, something to put you in jail for. Yeah, my name is Graham. No. Everybody would be in jail for stuff like this. Oh, what? Who?

Who, you know? Tommy, this is Captain all the time. No, this is nothing. I think you found your pencil. I think his name is Vicente. You show me a guy who killed his daughter. Yeah. And then you show me a guy who did robbery.

Okay, well, hey Vicente, if you want to hit up my mom. Hi, it's because I'm a little flirt. She's a little flirt too. and she doesn't see anything wrong what you did. I would be a great lawyer. I'm a little fear I would win the cases I'm fair. So if he's fit, I'm going to be fair. I feel like you're sympathetic to her robbery like robbery It's not driving me But there's no something that I'm gonna put people in jail because that's what I mean You're sympathetic like you're not you don't consider that to be a crime worth like putting somebody in prison for it. Like I think murder, like is murder where you draw the line?

Oh my gosh. Yeah. What a girl the line, not. Like you, but you would date these guys, but just not the murder. I wouldn't date any of these guys. But you would let them pass, I mean, it's no Samsung. But I'm just saying for the sake of like conversation, like you have to choose one of these guys. But you don't know what it let him pass. I mean, it's no time to make it. But sure, I'm just saying for the sake of like conversation, like you have to choose one of these gentlemen.

If I have to choose, yeah. Oh gosh. Which one was it when I chose before? The black guy, a sweet black guy. Yeah, what did he do? He was drunk and then he killed somebody on accident. Oh no, no. What was an accident?

Yeah, but nobody actually. What was an accident? He was driving drunk and he didn't, somebody died. Yeah, then you killed, no, not killers. So no. OK. I'm sorry. So then it's Vincente.

Vincente? I didn't do anything. He pissed the web somebody. But look at him. But someone, well, I want to talk. Hey, good, good, good. What's up, bro? OK.

What's up? Be cool, be cool. Yeah. Look at what somebody else in the world wrote. All right. You want to see Daddy Demarco or some tiktok's okay you know what I love okay okay we'll get you over there it's what do you know I don't know you show daddy see what see what we are talking about jail let's see what that says kind of a nice thread was it like to be gay and being a jail like whether a lot of homophobia how did you deal with it I see a lot of people that

just like openly gay and they get you know You don't try to say picked on man calling et cetera et cetera You know I'm saying even robbed and things like that but when it came to me I was like a different type of breed of gay. I was like a gay that can fight and a gay that will check you So fast that the dudes had no other choice but respect who I was Who is the type of individual? The kid is the mark. No that you have in the market? No, no, the black eyes.

So you got a lot of gangs in there that I was controlling. So when they see somebody that's gay like me and controlling people that they're scared of, there was a problem. They're scared of a group of people that I control and I'm gay. So at the end of the day, I became like the Godfather, Daddy the Muggle. Gay, Godfather. Gay Godfather, Daddy the Muggle. the godfather daddy the mago gay godfather gay godfather daddy the mago yeah so he was just telling you was what it's like to be you know gay and then jail but if you're him well if you're

him you're the king that's what he's saying yeah yeah we're good for him good for him I really don't try that yeah jail or yeah no yeah yeah no thank you yeah well that's for daddy the Marco um that is kind of cool for him, though. Daddy, when you think about it, what an ideal sitch. Like if he's like king of that jungle, you know, like, he's like, I'm the gayest motherfucker in here. Yeah. Idea.

And he's so around dudes all the time. Yeah. Oh, my God, before we go, I forgot this. Do you know that I did my, you know this company here? Liquid Death? No. This is a water I did my, you know this company here, liquid death? No. This is a water brand? Oh, it's water.

Yes, water. So I just did a commercial for them, and it came out this week. Okay, I want to see it. You want to see it? Yeah. Let's get you. You're gonna love this.

It's so good. It's so funny. It's so funny. So, girl, recycling glory hole by liquid death, because there is nothing more glorious than saving the planet. Hey, everybody, I'm Tom Sagerah, and I am partnering with liquid death

to launch my very own glory hole. That's right. Just walk up and slide your junk right in there. Hey, yo, would it take my junk? Unfortunately, no. Classic isn't actually recyclable. 95% of it gets sent to landfills. Hey, can I stick my big can in there?

Is it too big? Yeah! My mouth hole takes tall boys of all sizes. How much I got to pay? Just go to liquid death.com and make a one-time payment, and then you can use it again and again as many times as you want Don't forget Tom women can use it too Lord Becky it's twenty twenty three everyone can recycle

My glory hole is perfect for all sorts of occasions cool parties office parties retirement parties Cool parties, office parties, retirement parties, divorce, whatever makes you happy and you want to celebrate, use my mouth. So what are you waiting for? Pull your cans out and stick them in my mouth, whatever you want. We can all run train on classic pollution together! Get your time to go out and recycle and glory hole by LiquidDeft today! I'm going to have to order this. Available exclusively through this limited time internet address. You like to order it through this Lick with Debt.com slash Glory Hole right now so funny it's so good I'll have one sent to you if you really want one. Yes, I do it's really good I love such a funny ad yeah, it's good ad and intrinsically valuable. He's recycling recycling

Recycling Yeah, actually it's, it's great. Yeah. But don't forget, he's going to send me one. Yeah. Two years ago, he asked me if I wanted mattress, I was in his bed. He called me.

A mattress? Yes, he called me to see which one and gave me pictures. Yeah. I picked which one. Okay, the guy is going to call you. Yeah, I'd set it up. I just don't know what happened. I really did set it up.

I did. Two years ago. Yeah, and it actually might still be on the truck. Wow. It really might be on the truck. I swear. It might be in a warehouse just sitting. Can you call and ask them?

Yeah, it might be sitting like in steward or something, just waiting for, for what? For what? How to get to your house? Yeah. Can you call? Yeah. Maybe I get it when to get to your house? Yeah. Can you quote? Yeah. Maybe I get it when I go home.

Maybe? Maybe. I heard you bitches were looking for me. I hear you by the way. He asked me if I run it. I be in love. Two years ago. Still on the list.

It does not take that long. No. Hey, do you want to watch some TikToks? This is my, I love the segment because I curate these, TikToks from the app. You know, I love it so much. These are just special people that I really enjoy their work on TikTok. Are they clean?

Yeah. Of course they're clean. You want to see that guy, the guy that did the waxing do the other... Get out of here, tell me. Hey guys, I'm home. I'm saying a lot of replies on my video that I posted from the hospital earlier and the main theme is Yes, this is a tattoo and it is on my face. Is it that?

Yeah, is it that? story in and of itself basically when I was younger I was going through college and I worked as a tattoo artist I got married to young I left home too early My husband deployed to Iraq and I worked as a tattoo artist. I got married to young, I left home too early. My husband deployed to Iraq and I was alone. So I did, I got it a job as a tattoo apprentice and I thought, so it's great. You know, I'm gonna do this in a whole life.

I voted as a seedless voter. I was a regular, undiagnosed, I had no idea. I was bipolar. I just knew I got really, really sad sometimes, and then other times, I was on top of the world and unfortunately I had surrounded myself with people who came to the advantage of my mental state adults who should have known better and encouraged. Can I move it? So I am now a lot better than I am. Like I said, I'm working on my PhD in psychology. That's a big part of the story.

PhD is an ecology. Before they get to a point like this, I have looked, having it removed. It's crazy expensive. I have no idea how I'd ever really afford it. Also, it's very close to my eyes. Anything over here. The worst part.

So anyways, it's pretty cool. Thanks for brightening things up here. That's a very cool video. Well, you know what it looks like in mask when you're doing this. Yeah, it does. It does. You know, like that. I think it looks really cool. I like it. It's cool that it breaks my heart. Why? It looks awesome. Okay, you you really have to throw it in. But I like it. I think I want to do some too. I like that she kept her eyes out. Yeah. And me. She could put eyes out on. You can get someone way out of your league from a sociopath. This is going to sound

terrible, but be a bad person. As a woman, I like a guy who is terrible to everybody else, but takes care of me. Dark Tried Man are always more fun. I don't mean be rude to a waiter because your stamina is overcooked, but everyone hates sanctum-onious people. I try and man unencumbered by anxiety or empathy. This allows them to go through life without caring about what other people think. Next, this is obvious, but a sense of humour. Funny people are a lot harder, they don't get offended by everything people say.

This generation will have an aneurysm if you breed the wrong way. It's like a constant competition about who can be more offended. If you don't take yourself too seriously, you have an edge above everyone else. He Davidson is a great example. He's gotten with every attractive little people again. He's not exactly the best looking. Anyway, she's a diagnosed sociopath and she gives incredible life advice, like how to infiltrate a man's friend circle

and get Amanda fall in love with you. And then take advantage of him, get his money, and then let me give you. No, she doesn't blink. That's why she's a sociopath. And she just tells you her secrets. So that's... She's basically teaching people how to manipulate people.

Yeah, she's awesome. Yeah, she's awesome. Yeah, she's special. We're very fond of her. Yeah. What would you do to get treatment? I'm not kidding you. Pull your mic. Mic.

Treatment. No, no, just pull it down here. There you go. All right. I mean, can you hear me now? Yeah, what were you saying? Why don't you two get treatment? For what? Well, look at the sense that you love and you are addicted to her and she's a sociopath.

She's beautiful. Yeah, she's great. The looks has nothing to do with you. Look at everything. That's all we care about. She's nice, but stop. That's what you marry Kristina. Yeah.

Yeah. So you have any brain? No. But she's getting treatments. I mean more. She is. She's getting treatments. Yes, she's getting treatment with this person.

I have a boob job too. Yeah. Make them bigger. Boob job, face job coming up. Yeah. You're having a boob bigger? Yeah. Lift it up and then she's going to get a facelift.

Yeah. Where are you laughing and so on? Face lift. I don't know what they're lifting, but that's okay. I need a facelift, I need a booblet, that's what Tom says. I feel like that goat motor. Yeah, can you pay for it, facelift for me? Like that, I need to hire up and then I need my boobs

hire too. Can you give me a facelift? What do you wanna do that for? To look good. That's not, you don't wanna do that. I want to be all unwrinkled. No. Can you wait in my teeth?

So I can't as money's a token of it. Yes. You promise? Sure. You promise. I promise. It's officially. It's officially?

Promise. Well, we're doing two bits after the show. That's the exchange, okay? Two after this. Two bits. What is two bits? We filmed something in front of the green screen. So that's the exchange, okay? Two after this. Two bits. What is two bits? What is it?

We filmed something in front of the green screen, and then we sit in front of another, it's like bang, bang. Yeah. And I get my, my, my, you get your teeth whitened, yeah. No, white and no, veneers. Wait, you just,

you know that you just switched right? I know what, hold on, but you know that you just switched. You see I'm gonna do three shows for you. Wait, wait, wait, wait, just, why do you need that $400? Just everybody just saw you do a, you go, can I get my teeth, did she say I can I get my teeth white? I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I, wait, just, just, just, just, just, everybody just saw you do a, you go, can I get my teeth,

did she say I can I get my teeth right now? I heard, I heard you say, I heard you say, no, veneers are very different than white nines. Okay, number one, you're different. You told me that you have veneers wrong, I got horrible,

it's horrible. Don't do it. Oh, no, they're very painful. The only reason I do it is because I knocked out this tooth as a kid. Otherwise, I would never subject anybody. I did that. One each one is separated from the other one.

Yeah, but you can just do that. So now I have to smell like this. They're different colors, is that what you're saying? Yeah. So you can get them bonded, you can get them whitened. A whitening white house. White house and white animal. How do you know?

Have you done it? I did it long ago and didn't do any difference. It cost me a lot of money. How long ago did you do it? Oh, like five, six years ago. How much you know? Have you done it? I did it long ago and didn't do any difference. It cost me a lot of money. And I thought, how long did you do it? Oh, like five, six years ago. How much was it? Like $500. Okay.

Do you realize though that when you said, were you white in my teeth, you were at, hold on, hold on. That's one hour. You were basically saying, can I get $500? And then a moment later, you were like, can I get $30,000? But did you think that I'm going to do three shows for $500? No.

I'm going to get my iPad for what you just did and I'm going to go three shows for $500. No, the shows appear, you're supposed to, look, you're supposed to just appear on the show because you're my mother. No, you're my son. Right. And you can afford it. So we both love each other. I can hear it as your guest because I love you.

Right. And you love me so much that if I need something, let me help my mother. Well, if you need something and let me help my mother, yeah, sure. That's the case. What's the case? That I need to do something that I don't have to smite like this all the time. I mean, if it's the this, you would just do it. You can afford to do the thing that you want. 20,000 dollars. You have 20,000 dollars.

Yeah. Real talk about this veneer. It is so time consuming. You're going to have to go back. You know what they do, right? Multiple times. Do you about this veneer. It is so time consuming, you're gonna have to go back. Go what they do, right? Multiple times. Do you know how veneers work? Very painful too. It takes a long, thin, soft. Do you know what they do when you get veneers?

It's a horrible trial. Can you answer that though? Yes. What do they do? I think they take my teeth out. No. They shave your teeth down. They till like, it's a little tiny nubs.

It's horrible. Can you pull up, just look at it. Like's a little tiny nubs. It's horrible. Can you pull up, um, just look at it. Like how they put veneers. I just want you to know exactly what it is. It's excruciating painful. So to listen to me, Charo, they shave down your real teeth into little nubbins,

little pointed nubs. Okay. See that nub? That's what my tooth looks like under. That's what it's going to be of veneer. That's what it'll be underneath. That's what it's going to be a veneer. That's what it'll be underneath. That's what my real teeth look like under these two. Those things. Those things. Over your teeth.

The hole in and then not only that, then they have to make a mold. So then you're going to walk around with temporary teeth for like two weeks while they make the porcelain veneers. And then those are going to fucking fall out all the time. There. The tears are right here. So they shave down the your teeth? Because those things are underneath, yeah. And then that's what's over is underneath it. So it looks beautiful in the end, but first you have to shave all your teeth.

And there is something. Help them, all the people who are in every show now. And they are completely white and even. Because they're doing this too. And also, you're not, like, this is actually not ideal when they're white white white because it looks. You're crazy. Yeah.

The event like they really good ones do a version of it where it looks like you have wider and clean teeth, but not like it will look as white as the clouds in this. You know, I mean it's not supposed to be that white. It's supposed to have like a little bit of. Also, they pop off all the time because they're very light, they pop off. So like one time I was eating a sushi roll with Tom and when he was in the hospital and my tooth popped off

and like in the middle of the day, I had to run to the dentist and get it. It's terrible. They're in the middle of it. How much are they? A whole mouthful, 30 grand. That's what I guess was. Top some bottoms.

If you're doing top, you have to do both if you're gonna do it. But so what is your skid dentures dude like knock them all out? I could see and just get dentures like the Mormons do don't they do that? No, boys per tooth. One to four thousand per tooth. Okay, forget it. Oh no, no, no, no. Yeah, no. So that's Yeah, top set. Yeah, so it's Oh, no, no, no, no. Yeah, no. So that's yeah, top set, yeah, so $20,000. This is $20,000.

It's $40,000 for the full now. And this is you, this, by the way, this is for you is like, I just did a bit on your show. Okay, forget it. Can I get $40,000? No, okay, we do that this way, I didn't end there. Okay. All right, that's in way.

You know where it's cheaper. You wouldn't do dentures? I do out of your mind. I don't know. I've known that people dentures my whole life. Why is that out of your mind. I don't know. I've known that people dentures my whole life. Why is that out of your mind? I know that you think they're more loud. Yeah.

And then when I think they're more like night, go like this. Yeah. They knock out the teeth you have. Does that what old people do? Yes, but if I don't need it right now, let's look at the dentures. You want me to knock them out? Between $305. Much more economical.

Oh, yeah. No, let's keep it light. But all I yes is my light. But all they have to do is rip out, they pull out your real teeth, and then they give you the game like this. And I'm happy. Can we please do dentures? I do, out of your freaking mind.

For what? Can I tell you 10,000? I still say nothing. Can I tell you something? I'll take it again. I'll take it again one day. I'll take it again iPad if you get dentures No, you take me the iPad. They have nothing to do with the dentures. We didn't we didn't know we agree with that What did we agree? We agree when I told you and you say okay, when did I say okay? You didn't say okay?

Well, she is blessing well. I didn't know we did not say okay. Can you say okay now? Can we do dentures to no? No, you want your mind, we don't do so I can have a night, but. Well, that's a funny, that's like a good exchange I think. No, absolutely no. Can I tell you what the good part is about dentures? You can eat as much candy as you want. I can't.

You can eat as much candy as you want and fall right to sleep like you normally do. And they won't get your teeth going to bed. It's going to happen soon because I want the kind of thing that's going to happen. It's going to happen as it would it can do my mouth. But some saying she probably needs root canals and stuff. Have you had a root canal? The L in salmon is silent.

Also forget that. Oh, think of it maybe as an I. Sam in salmon. Oh. Salmon. Salmon. Something smoked salmon. It's not the man box. It's so. You know, you. Salmon, something's so bad. It's something that I'm not a man. It's salmon box.

It's salmon. You know what I'm saying? This is wrong for years. This is a good video for you. Oh my life, yeah. So it says salmon. Salmon. Salmon.

Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon.

Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Salmon. Sal? Sam, in. You just did it. I know the problem for you because you learned obviously in Spanish and you say the L in Spanish. That's why. Salmon. That's why you, that's why you in English is a, it's a weird thing to drop the L. It is weird. I wonder what is the origin of this word that we would spell like this but it sounds just like this word

locks salmon locks where can you go go where the words Salman is from like what's the origin this is Latin the Ellen Sam was never pronounced in English and his presence in the spelling is a result. I don't care for the change to some different topic. Result of the same 17th century Latin session. I can't get in there for this topic. They gave us the B in debt. Oh, and doubt. Tell me.

Sam and in Latin. We ran out of time. They got the substance worth it. Salmon name. Oh my God. Which was pronounced as written. That's fascinating. It is interesting.

I love this thing. So, if I wonder why we don't pronounce it, you know, it's very difficult for showing him by way of your family. Teaching children how to read. It's very confusing for our sons. They don't know how to read that word. I really like that we did the deep dive on that.

Oh, gosh, it's a fascinating. In front of a woman with a reasonable grievance, she will typically respond with a lack of accountability. Oh my God. Instead, she will typically respond through denials, deflections, and defensiveness, just like a narcissist. So with that, women speak the language of emotions, men speak the language of logic.

Yes, sure. You will never win a logical argument with a woman. How are you going to actually stand back from a conversation that you're having with a woman when there are you actually stand back from a conversation that you're having with a woman when there is a grievance at play and she'll say, hmm, I think you're right. Simply put, you cannot win an argument with a woman.

And it's true. So how do you handle an argument with a woman if she is being typically difficult? Typically, the best way to approach that is to simply back off and to isolate her. Raising your voice is not effective. Abuse is not effective. Herding her in any such way is not effective.

But demonstrating your value by withdrawing it makes it all the more potent to a woman your point of view. If she continues her dysfunctional point of view, then continue to withdraw your affection. If she does not respond to your withdrawal, then it's better for you to reconsider your relationship with her because probably just does not respect you anyway. This guy's amazing. And he was a hundred percent accurate. And you should withdraw your affection from people that you're like conflicting with. I think that's a really good that's really good advice. Yeah it makes the woman feel really loved right? Yeah well when you're fighting and then

she's like and then you just withdraw. Right but like you withdraw and then also if she if she does care about you you're leaving this whole you're hurting her emotionally and that's how you win that's really good that's good advice. I don't think that's right Tommy. Well this it's how it but he's it does. It's effective. It's effective. Not necessarily ethical, but it's effective. It's right. It'll fuck her up. It'll mess up her head. Mess up her head. And there's grew up a woman by doing that. You definitely. Yeah. You're mostly you're emotionally emotionally

damaged her. How to like you. Let me destroy you. These guys are amazing. This is why we need is more guys like this in the be more prominent. I'm really damnate her. How do I go? Let me destroy you. These guys are amazing. This is why we need more guys like this and the more prominent. I'm going to still go out and be highlighted him. Let's go to the next one. Oh my God. Oh my God. Look what's in there.

I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed.

I'm peed. I'm peed. I'm peed. You know what it is? That guy. No, it's a snake. It's a snake in the toilet. She peed. Didn't realize there was a huge snake.

I. Yo, and you know this was where she peed? I should peed. Yeah, that's why she's freaking out. She peed, and you know where this happened? Florida. This is where this happens all the time. Snakes come up in your plumbing, dude.

Yup, you can be peeing on the snake all the time. And they love farts. Yup. I get those. You've been peeing on snakes your whole life and you don't even know about it. Yeah, and they probably, your house, it probably has a whole family of snakes in it.

They probably, that's, I'm hoping. Dude, isn't that an Arleigh? Look at the house, it probably has a whole family of snakes underneath. They probably, though. I'm moving. Dude, isn't that an early one? Look at this, that's not a little baby snake either. No, I told you. It's so scary. Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

That's a bear attacking this man. What is the man? The guy, he's wearing the camera. He's wearing the camera, man. What is the man? The guy he's wearing the camera. He's on the camera, yeah, he's screaming. So he's screaming and freaking out because a bear is coming up. I can't, I just have the time to record that. The camera's mounted to him. So it's like, you understand?

So he's climbing, he's just out in the wilderness, and then a bear approaches him. I can't do that. He's just out in the wilderness and then a bear approaches him. I get the... I get the... I get the... I get the... I get the... Okay, don't say much as Kirsten.

I get the... I get the... I get the... I get the... I get the... cute in the bag. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

I get the worst. No. No. No. No. No. No. We have the video him being eaten.

Do you want to see it? A video him what? Being eaten by the bear. Do you want to see it? No, absolutely not. No, no, no. I don't know you could kick a bear, dude. Yeah, well that bear's not that big.

And they tell you, if you're in, there's different things, but like you make yourself big, you're trying to like, you're trying to make the bear think that you're an aggressive in nature as well, right? Like you don't run, because then there's triggers in the chase you. And then if you're actually being attacked,

then it's a different thing where they tell you to like cover your, your vitals, your neck and your head. But at this point, he's doing like, what you're actually being attacked then it's a different thing where they tell you to like cover your your vitals your neck and your head but at this point he's doing like what you're supposed to do so he's like screaming trying to make himself big. Oh dude. But that's that is the opposite. I mean if I'm gonna be screaming I am attracting the bear. No no no he's're and then the bear is feeding him very adam But it's a crazy video if you want to watch it. No, thank you. No. Yeah, no Yeah, it's it's a really interesting point of view because the camera is on the guy who's being eaten So you don't normally see the bear eat you, you know It's pretty cool. I You don't want to see it?

Absolutely. Why would I want to see something like that? Are you sure you don't want to see that guy trim his pubic hair though? Tommy, that's enough. I'm leaving. You ask me that question again. Okay. All right. Use all man in your life. So manipulate and use all man for your gain. If a man shows interest or a crush, use him to get ahead and whatever that person can offer you, use anyone and everyone of the male species to get ahead in your own life. If someone is giving you a little bit of things, gifts, but it's not enough. Take it and get another one. Use

as many as possible and anyone that has a crush on you, use them. For example, if you're in a store, if you're walking down the street, if a door man has a crush on you, get perks, use them to your advantage,ulate and pretend you have a crush to gain and get more. Give fake numbers, phone numbers if you have to. Give fake information, fake names if you have to. Have five or six names, five or six personalities. At that day, pick whichever one you want to use.

To gain and manipulate from as many men as possible. Because if you are gaining from multiple men, you will end up a very wealthy beautiful monster. What? This is how I do it. This is how I do it. Like the guy before for these videos like this. I mean, in Tiktok, you had a face on this.

She's beautiful. She's a horrible voice. Yeah. I think that was how God cursed her. He was like, I'm going to give you this voice that people are going to have for you. And I'll do a nice beauty, I don't think she's beautiful. She's beautiful. She's a horrible voice. I think that was how God cursed her. He was like, I'm gonna give you this voice that people are gonna I think she's pretty. I think the gum in her mouth is a little distracting Yeah, I'm sure she would spit out the chewing gum. Yeah, but I do I think it's good advice. I've done it for years. Yeah, it's actually really funny for years. Yeah. It's actually really funny. Yeah.

Oh, she did. Anybody who watched you, that's a nodio said, I'm gonna get this to a phone. So what, brilliant, because we bring good news to the world. She's not wrong, but I don't think you're gonna find love this way. I think the problem, many are you are going to get all the money that you want. She says, but then she did talk about love. She says, just manipulate them. This one doesn't know love. She doesn't want love. She wants money. She says, you're going to enrich.

That's so sad. But don't you want to have someone to share your money? No. Just give me the money. Yeah. Did you do this when you were younger? I did it like grace. I would give her a little something.

Oh, what did you give her? Something in her butt. Oh, I get clean for a little bit. I would nail her butthole and then I'd go in there. Can you just out of respect for me to clean it this way? I'd be like, here's your gift. Get ready to go to the doctor. Do you think she does?

She's gonna walk right for a week. Can we talk? Does stuff with guys, like does she have to give up sex to get stuff, you think? Maybe sometimes it depends on how much stuff. That's usually how that works. Yeah. Here, watch this. Treat women like a 10-year-old and they'll love you for it. So when you're on a date, don't for example talk about politics, economics, all those complicated

things. Talk about food, sex, partying, going on vacation. That's the things that women resonate well with. When they argue with you, don't get upset. Acheolou a sua infância. É o que as pessoas rezenem com isso. Quando eles perguntam com você, não se você se apresenta. Se você se apresenta se você é arguing com o 10-year-old, é claro que não, porque eles são 10-year-olds. Então quando você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old

ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old ou você está em argumento com o 10-year-old This guy is pretty nice. When you're also engaging in a breakup, keep in mind that her emotionals are all over the place, just like a 10-year-old. So when you're dealing with a woman, deal with her as a 10-year-old and you will understand and appreciate

your audience much better and you'll be a lot more poised. I think that's how you fall for a lot more. A lot much more. You will not be disappointed when the person acts out because of course she is acting like a 10-year-old. All right. He's absolutely right, huh?

He's absolutely up 100% right? Really? What part do you resonate with? What part makes sense? He does the way Tom treat me. You're husband. He has been. Yeah.

I think he never brought to me, he never talked about politics with me, he never talked about his work, he will come. It was great, good day. And then we talk about how are the dogs? How was the day, baby? Did you play bridge today? Did you go shopping or did you return?

And I thought this guy really loved me. Yeah. And so we didn't have to argue. Yeah. We never have an argument because we didn't have the chance to have an argument. Sure. The topics of conversation was me and cleaning the house and taking care of the dogs. You kept telling me but I worked for you guys. It worked. I was at 10 years old and I was happy. Yeah, there you go. And then you just revealed to me the secret. The secret. That's big 10 years old. Well, I will say that I enjoy the topics of a 10 year old. I like talking about farting and ponies and kittens and dogs.

Like I love 10 year old. And that would be your only type of conversation. That's a lot, right? What do you think the show is? This show is like 10 year old. I think those inmates will love this and we start sending those letters. Yeah. I remember going out to dinner with your father and Kathy, which is a CIA or whatever

she was. Yeah. And they talk nonstop about politics and all the stuff. And it was like boring, boring. And I said, I am not involved in this. He said, that's okay, baby, don't worry, just eat your pie. But don't you think that that it worked well? No, you don't think that I didn't learn anything. No, the dynamic worked well. The dynamic work. Perfect happiness. Yeah. No fights. Yeah, I'm always right no matter what, but he does whatever he wants. He moved me from town to town making me feel like I was going to be the happiest woman. You're going to love it here. You're going to love it here. We're going to Minnesota. Best town in the world.

Okay. He took me away from my sister who lived next door. The school, the friends that I finally made to the prison, 10 below zero. Is that where you feel you would have been the happiest in Ohio and Cincinnati? Yeah, you would have been next door to Blanca and. Zero doubt. Yeah.

And it was the first place I went. So I really grew to love Cincinnati. I feel confident, I feel comfortable. Yeah. The kids went to school together. I mean, it was a perfect life. But then, you know, he did have to do it for the career, right? Well, because you wanted to go into management, he didn't have to.

Yeah. Right. But I'm glad for him and he did. But he regretted many times. You know, the regretted in the sense that what he did. But many times he says, I always wonder if I did the right thing, getting into the bathroom she can do in this studio. And I said, well, you know, he gave me all the time,

I have to give something. But the hard thing is when you don't feel confident with your language, and you don't know people, and you right don't know people because you don't have to socialize. And then you move to a different town, a different city. And the kids are still small, so you have to get doctors, you have to get a school, you have to learn the city.

And until now I can not really map. So go straight, take your right three books later. I mean, that's how I treat them. Oh my God. Do you want to know how stupid I am? How? You get lost completely. I had lunch with a friend yesterday.

Tom, you're going to hate, okay, so first, last week, we learned that I learned how to use a shower cap. I've never used a shower cap. I just put my hair in a ponytail and then I stand under the water kind of like this so that my hair doesn't get wet. Okay, that's how stupid I am. Guess how fucking retarded I am, Tommy.

I can't guess. So I was at lunch with my friend and I go, we're talking about direction. She's like, I don't know direction. I was like, well, all I know is North. Never eat soggy weedies. And she goes, North isn't up here. It's straight ahead.

Is that right? Like, where's North then? Oh, it's so, North is. Never eat soggy weedies. But like, does that make sense, Tom? Is this North? This is North?

Up. That's what I'm saying. Up is North. I mean, you don't know. Is this this is North? Up. That's what I'm saying. Up isn't North. I mean, you know, I'm just always this. No, no, you don't know which way, right now, you don't know, I don't know which way we're direction we're facing.

So I don't know what I mean, North can be right here. So then I have to turn around and go, never eat soggy weedies. Well, that's what I have to have a compass. I don't have a clue. But my whole life, I've been pointing up. Up is always north. You would not always up.

So basically there was no north for you. I mean. That's your wife. Yeah, that's wild. In LA, you know, it was very simple. You always know where the ocean is, right? So the ocean's always west, yeah. Right, in Florida, the ocean's always east.

It doesn't make any difference. I don't know if I'm facing the ocean. Well, I'm saying if you know where the ocean is when you're in Florida, you know you're facing east. Yes, I know that, but I've never was like North. That's what I was saying. I was like, oh, it's like the North Pole or something is like up there.

This is worse than any show you can show. That's pretty crazy. She went out to go north. Which way are we facing right now? Do you know? I will take that north north is here north is there told you it's right there right there This is not yeah North. How would you know it? Yeah, how would you know? Just know like we know is where we're situated in which way he's facing right now. I don't know, fuck about shit. My direction. I don't know why. You know anything about this?

Fingering your butt is a really good way to loosen up before sex. It's a good way. More specifically receptive. I thought you were to take that stuff out of my show. His teeth are white. See how his teeth look? Yeah, look at his teeth.

Whatever he's doing. That's what we need to do. Yeah, I have yellow teeth at least in to this guy. Okay. Tonight I wish you curious. at least into this guy. Okay. I'm not curious. Don't invite him in my short. This is talking about a loser. I have your guess here.

No, okay. We got a rap. Okay. He has dentures. He has dentures. I'm good for him. And I'm willing to get you them. No, but I'm gonna get my whiteening.

Okay. Okay. Mom, it's always a pleasure. Thank you for coming. Thank you for coming and thank you so much for the really fun. He was absolutely at the life to be here. I'm sorry that I didn't make you laugh. No, you were great No, you're great always making me laugh and you know, you're like a mother to me and I love that you Can you believe that I love you? It's a son. I know. Yeah, I'm like a son to you. I really really really really truly love you I love you too. I love you too.

That's so sweet. But I really love you both to extend. Don't you feel like a son is different though, a bond? Like, they say that the birth of your first son is your last love. Yes, I saw you. I was talking to Christina, I saw Tommy doing it. Did he push?

Oh, yeah, he does it all the time. I swear, I didn't for it, I swear. I swear. You swear that you like to. I swear to God. No, don't just God for this. I swear to God. You don't just God for this.

I absolutely don't allow you. I don't allow you. Okay, I'm gonna take another one. I love you guys. I love you too. And I'm sorry we didn't get to watch the butthole fingering stuff, but I will talk about it.

I don't take a shit today. Yeah, I got a piss so bad. I feel like I got a piss I love you loving good bye. Okay, and we will see you next week. Thanks mom. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. 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Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. I'm for fun, I'm not having, I'm for fun, I'm having, I'm having, I'm for fun, I'm having, I'm for fun, I'm having, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for fun, I'm for You are causing a big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. Are you a rat? I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog.

I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a hotdog. I'm having a big hotdog sauce. We're having a big hotdog sauce. I'm having a big hotdog sauce. We're having a big hotdog sauce. I'm having a big hotdog sauce. I'm having a big hotdog sauce. I'm having a big hotdog sauce.

I'm having a big hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a hotdog sauce. I'm having a, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on

I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not going to fall on I'm not falling, I'm not a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun.

I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun.

I'm having a core fun. I'm having a core fun. I'm having a cold bond? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no