Your Stupid Opinions - Airport Steaks, Poop Planter Park, The Monogamy Game

Episode Date: February 24, 2025

Another week of wild reviews! We look at a board game, meant for lovers, but seems more like it's meant for people who don't really like each other. An airport steakhouse, where the bartender may actual ask if you're stupid, for wanting food. A public park that seems to be more bathroom, than park, but has more discarded syringes than you could possibly want & much more!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad free right now join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts Hello everybody and welcome back to Your Stupid Opinions. Hey! Hello there, my name is James Petragallo, I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. Thank you folks for joining us on another illustrious week of complaints, grievances and general malfeasance that goes on all over everywhere. We get to hear everyone's complaints.

And speaking of that, we do have to tell you upfront, these aren't our complaints. No. We didn't write these. These are just reviews we found on the internet of places. And we like to compare different experiences. Some people's five stars and some people's one stars of the exact same place are fascinating.

So that's why we do the show. And we are gonna dive right into this here. We are going to go, you know what, let's go on a trip. And to get there, we'd have to go to an airport. We are gonna go to the Detroit Metropolitan Wayne County Airport here. The old Detroit Airport. DTW. DTW. No, DTW is Dallas. The old Detroit airport. DT, DT. DTW, DT Dubs. DTW.

No, DTW is Dallas. DFW is Dallas. No, DFW is DTW, yeah. Is Wayne, Dallas, yeah, it's the Detroit. And then you got PHX and PHL. Yes. No wonder they lose fucking bags. Yeah, that's gonna happen sometimes.

How did my bag end up, that was supposed to go to Boston that time, end up in fucking Phoenix? Phoenix. That's what I'd like to know. Those are very different. It's because we had a layover in Philly, that time end up in fucking Phoenix. That's what I'd like to know. Those are very different. It's because we had a layover in Philly. That's why. That was bad. It was Detroit that did this to me.

Detroit lost my bag. Right, what the fuck? It was Detroit lost my bag. We were the only ones in there at the fucking 4.30 in the morning. No one was there. How do you fucking put it in the wrong thing? So anyway, we're at the airport here. We got got a long layover we're stuck in that airport again Jimmy

yeah let's get something to eat what do you say let's do it let's do it at the only thing we can hear the best thing at the airport is the Outback steakhouse let's go there out back at the airport Detroit Wayne Airport golly I will say this about Outback Outback is the airport. The Detroit Wayne airport, golly. I will say this about Outback. Outback is not, it's not the best quality steak in the world, but it's a goddamn fine meal. It's, it's, it's certainly middle of the road. And yeah.

You're never gonna be, it's never gonna be like, ugh, that was gross. You're never gonna go, oh my God, melt it in your mouth, but it is fine. That onion's great. As the trash I grew up with yeah that was a tree we're fucking oh yeah that was our Super Bowl man we're going to outback that's like get out of here you who got a fucking we

got a job return what happened we got fucking wow did you get married is that what's happening is this a is this a reception what are we doing scratch off pay off what happened yeah dude it is wild man so out this outback has 2.6 stars on Google that's not terrible that's terrible now you gotta wonder if some of these stars are because people are at the airport which right away you're frustrated, your stress is at a high level. They took too long, they made me miss my flight, some shit like that. Yeah, because to me, if I'm at the airport at any restaurant buying food, if it's generally what I ordered, I'm happy with it.

I'm not expecting it to be the best quality of that, best version of that that's ever existed at the airport. Any chain restaurant that's sit down, whether it's a Chili's or of that that's ever existed. It's the airport. Any chain restaurant that's sit down, whether it's a Chili's or whatever restaurant is at the airport, it's going to be their worst version of that. Oh, totally, yeah. 100%.

Like it's gonna be their Chili's Express basically. Like just some like. It's Chili's Airport. It's disgusting. So this is, I love the way they describe the Outback by the way, boisterous Australian themed chain serving steak, seafood and other hearty steakhouse fare. Boisterous.

Is it boisterous? In your face steakhouse. It's just a chain restaurant. Nobody comes up to you and is like, OI WHAT'S UP CUNTS! Like that doesn't happen at all there. That would be boisterous. A fucking kangaroo punches you in the face. This place is boisterous, boy. Let me tell you something

Oh, I watching the footy today who lost in the footy. Are you pow and they kick it? Kick your fucking child out of its booster seat Boisterous, oh, why did they that came from corporate? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's not their Google description So here we go five stars from Anthony Okay. Now first of all, the place is really pretty the lights are awesome It's really pretty at the Detroit Airport outback they have electric Wow Wait, will you see the Pizza Hut in the Indianapolis Airport? You're gonna jerk off on the floor when you see that. Whip it right out. Oh forget about it you're gonna go nuts for that shit. The Donatos in Columbus is gonna make your fucking

nipples hard buddy. So pretty. Since my flight was delayed I came right at the time of closing. So sorry about that but the flight was delayed for four hours from 6 p.m. and everything else was closed. The waiter graciously let me in and even though we were the last customers food was still hot and pretty good. They ran out of buns but then the chef found some more buns at the other restaurant. We broke into another place.

They just busted into the fucking Burger King over down the way. There's sesame seed, but I hope you like them. I know the menu says no seeds, but you know, that's what whoppers come with. I don't know what to tell you, buddy. It says brioche, but we got whopper. Seeded whopper buns. And then they say that's some determination and they gave the burger free of charge Awesome people there recommend burger. Yeah, cuz it wasn't even like yeah, we got him a whopper jr. It's fine Linda five stars Lisa took very good care of us will be our go-to spot when we're traveling

very good care of us will be our go-to spot when we're traveling. We gotta head to that outback at the airport. Let's book a layover in Detroit so we can hit the outback. You want to eat something before we go to the airport? Fuck no! We're going to spoil the outback? Shit no! Absolutely not! We're not eating shit.

We had one stop over in Atlanta. I added another just for outback. Just because I could stop at the Outback. We're flying four planes today. They don't have them in other places. So we can get that top sirloin. Oh, man, it's the best. Drinks and food were super yummy.

Smiley face. All right. All right. Now we get to one star from Angel. First time in Michigan's airport, Outback. Came to Outback to get a decent meal or so I thought. Some African American guy points at my wife to go back out while I wasn't looking. He made it sound like it was from the movie Soul Man where he was like,

get out bitch! And then backhanded her and threw a watermelon rind at her. That's what it sounded like he was saying, get out, bitch! Like he was like, and then backhanded her and fucking threw a watermelon rind at her. That's what it sounded like he was saying for some reason. I don't know why. An outback bouncer that just points at people and is like, not you. Not you. But he's like super black though. And he said it like, I'm not racist.

I said African American. Is that good enough? That's what this guy seems like. I said African American. The guy was whipping himself with an ox tail. Yeah. I said an African American was doing it, didn't I? So it turns out he had to sit us, but seems to have an attitude

because they had about an hour to close. An hour! He took us to our table, we looked at the menu, and that's when she told me how rude he was. Apparently he was apparently he was all Yeah, she was like let me tell you what happened the lady told him we left without ordering and he just rolls his eyes People if you go to a place to make money make sure you deserve it treat people the way you want to be treated He said you people basically too, which is fine.

CJ One Star arrived early for our flight, thought let's get breakfast prior to boarding. After standing outside because the sign said please wait to be seated for over 10 minutes, a red haired waitress walked out. He's very descriptive of who these people look like and kept her back to us She stood there and talked at length with one of two tables no acknowledgement of us standing there Okay, she probably wasn't the hostess. She was probably the waitress different We thought this is ridiculous and walked toward the server and asked if we could sit She stated front is blocked off and we could take a seat behind the chairs which were blocking the tables with a view

You need a view eat your fucking airport breakfast and go on your goddamn plane and blow shit up the toilet What are you doing? Where are you flying to you have this much time? Who gives a shit about the view at the fucking airport restaurant? Do you care about that here and have a blooming onion and yeah, 737 stay? We go to the Delta Sky Club and they have the fucking windows and it's there a big I don't care about that I sit as far away from every given. Yes. That's all I'm doing. Is there a dark corner? I can sit in and eat my cheddar cheese cubes because that's all I trust from this fucking buffet Where does everybody hate to sit? That's where I'll sit. That's where I don't want to be around anybody weird chair with the half a desk in the corner I'll take it don't care

everybody's crowding around the windows that's where all the sick is keep that shit away from me no thank you come after sitting down she came over with menus I said these are not breakfast and she said I'm sorry we stopped serving breakfast at 930 Wow, that is really early to stop sir 931 cheeseburger time. Yeah Who the fuck wants a goddamn sirloin and or a cheeseburger and fries at 940 in the morning? Then they said it was 934 Now they have to order Now they have to order barbecue chicken at.40 in the morning. This is crazy. Enjoy your chicken fingers and blooming onion, you fuck.

What time do they open? Yeah, they open at 2. Nothing in the airport opens before 6am. No. So what do they serve breakfast for an hour and a half? What do they serve at Outback for breakfast anyway? Why bother buying eggs if you're only gonna You are you just go to fucking chick-fil-a. Yeah somewhere goddamn McDonald's. I don't know. Are you kidding me?

Exclamation point all caps. No, we waited probably 15 minutes to sit in an empty restaurant. Now, I know why Because they were trying to wait them out after pull after bread. I didn't want to make you breakfast Conspiracy theory turning over the kitchen. That's it We got up and left. I work in service industry my grumpy little friend I hope your pockets are empty because you earned every penny of that Jesus Christ They work at the airport. Yeah, you know Because they wouldn't serve you eggs. Fuck you. Yeah. Do you how miserable that is? All that spite because they wouldn't serve you eggs? Fuck you.

Yeah. Do you have to go through a metal detector at work? Cause they do. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like that's, that'll make it grumpy. They gotta take their fucking shoes off to come to work. Right away I'm grumpy, yeah.

So Jamie one star, I will never step foot inside of an outback steakhouse again. I would I We had the most rudest most rudest most rudest redheaded unprofessional server now We know of her the legendary redheaded server of the Detroit Outback. We get it. Did you give her your order at her shoulders? My question is, is she the most rudest server or the most rudest redheaded server? I don't know. There you go, that's a good question. This could be just very specific. We were sitting on the table, well that's a problem right there, for at least 25 minutes, me and my daughter

waiting for anybody to acknowledge us. When I asked if she could take her drink order, she loudly from behind the bar yelled that, what are you, too stupid? You couldn't read the sign out there that says you need to be wait, we need to wait to be seated? I don't think she said that.

I don't think, what are you, too stupid? I don't think she said that. Yeah, nobody says that. Nobody says that in an airport. Not even Detroit. No, no. I've seen some people ask some dumb shit in the airport and no one says, what are you, stupid?

You can't read? Yeah, I had a bottle of cologne in my bag that's shaped like a grenade. It's called Spice Blom. And so they opened up my bag. Perfect for the airport. The guy holds it up to me and goes really? And I go, it's cologne and he goes, you see what it looks like?

Yeah, what the fuck did you think? Of course I'm gonna pull this out, stupid. Yeah. You might as well have had it shaped like a gun that's like fucking fresh blasts. I'm acting all inconvenienced. He didn't say what are you stupid?

Yeah, he should have. And you earned it. You earned it. If he said what are you stupid, you would have went, I guess I think I am. Yeah, I'm pretty stupid, yeah. You would have taken that on the chin, I think. I would have. Yeah, I guess I'm an idiot. Shit, my bad. So, she said, oh there it is, she is a disgrace to your company.

She should not be working with public whatsoever. The entire restaurant, everybody was waiting. There was a line of at least 20 people waiting to be sat outside of the restaurant. They all left and we came down to Atwater Brewery Bar. Great service here and the food is much better. Okay, that's the manager of Atwater. Cave up, yeah. That At water is what you need to try. Yeah, no one said stupid, I don't believe any of that.

I don't believe that for a second. No, Winnie one star. Terrible experience, I have loved Outback before. That seems a little strong. Before? Well, loved seems a little strong. You go, you like Outback? Yeah.

It's fine. It's fine? Yeah, it's good. You know, you like Outback? Yeah. It's fine. Yeah. It's fine. Yeah, it's good. Yeah. It's, you know, love it. It's fine. I love that place. You're like, isn't this great? Yeah. I love that place we went to in Kansas City. That was cool. That was cool. I love that place. Like a jazz band going, this place is in a basement. Like this place is fucking awesome. That was cool. Loved it. You love that. I don't love the Outback airport. I've't love the outback airport. I've never been to Outback and been like, this is an environment.

Like, if the restaurant, if it's your birthday, they don't gather the people to sing to you, that's a nice restaurant. That's a nice, yes. The nicer the restaurant, the less public embarrassment suffered by all. That's the way it works. They'll bring you a dessert for free.

No candle, no spectacular shit. Here you go. Nobody's drawing it. by all that's the way it works. They'll bring you a dessert for free no candle no spectacular shit. Here you go. Nobody's drawing it nobody's embarrassing you on your birthday. Here's a creme brulee fuckhead there you go that's what you're getting for your birthday that's it. You're not getting some weird chocolate lava explosion or some shit. I don't need that. So but I'm very disappointed this time with their service dirty table and chairs. We waited, and this is funny, in quotes, forever. I don't know why it's in quotes.

Quoty forever. Quoty forever for the waiter slash waitress. I ordered a drink, just saw it had been placed on the bar table over 15 minutes and no one delivers it to me. Waitress disappeared until she delivered me the food so I got to cancel my drink I am highly I am highly recommend. I am highly recommend not going to this outback She's mad because her drink sat there I could seriously overlook that I don't care like I'd want the drink

But is it a bar drink or is it a soda? You know I mean, it's a man who cares or you can go. Hey, this is a little watery. You can get me a new one Okay, you know one to coke. No one cares. Yeah, yeah Liana one star if I could leave zero stars I Would that's nailed it Three exclamation points. This is from four months ago too, so she might know. She might know to do it right by now. Yeah, she may have heard about it.

We may be influencing people, I don't know. Redhead waitress. Ah! This fucking waitress is a menace to Detroit. She really is. She is legendary in Detroit, and nobody knows her fucking name. That's the beauty of Outback, evidently, is they don't legendary in Detroit. Nobody knows her fucking name. That's the beauty of Outback evidently is they don't wear name tags. No, she's the second

most famous person next to Eminem right now that's from Detroit. It's Eminem and this redheaded waitress. And Barry Sanders. That's all we got right now. Said, oh my God, Redhead Waitress was so rude and yelled at us, said we were stupid for not reading the sign. I think that's her gig. She says it. She says, hey stupid, you didn't read the sign. I kind of love this lady now. This is amazing.

This is, the fuck is happening? And this is not the same person that was with it before. If it's two reviews, it happens. It's, that's what I'm looking. The other one was from a different time. So I think this is a different fucking person completely. She is a vicious woman. Wow.

Had a huge line waiting to be seated and redhead wait staff was just beyond rude. Manager was just sitting down with AirPods in, ignoring the mess of a restaurant establishment Like what you're stupid. It's a did you tell them they're stupid. Yeah, okay, and he goes back to scrolling good job Holy they're like you're trapped in the fucking terminal. What are you gonna? Do? Where you going? Yeah, you're trapped there Who manages the airport nobody knows nobody cares nobody cares in the airport unless you're committing a terrorist act everything else goes

That's how the airport works Everything else is complaining you might be a terrorist we don't listen. It's all this Change rules change so that you can bring shit in here no No, you're too stupid. Do that's why that's why there's all these rules cuz you're stupid David one star worst service ever I didn't even have a waiter or waitress I don't know how that works then is it did you go back and cook it yourself? We're talking about? Maybe that's what it was. I believe the bartender was, I believe the bartender was, but hard to tell yelled over bar for my order was sitting in booth. So she yelled from the bar. he yelled from the bar. What do you want?

What do you want over there? I'll make sure they admit it to you. Are you two, oh wait, you did read the sign, okay. Soup came with a plastic spoon. Yeah, I expect better at fucking the Outback. At a sit-down restaurant, I want metal spoons. I'm not eating my spoon, no. The airport, I've gotten plastic silverware,

quote unquote, every, almost, I mean, probably 80% spoon. No. The airport, I've gotten plastic silverware, quote unquote, every almost, I mean, probably 80% of the time. Really? I just had a burger and they gave me a knife and fork at LaGuardia. Yeah. They gave me a knife and fork for a fucking burger. Like a full, like a steak knife.

You get to go fucking direct so many places. That's why. I have to go to these fucking, like I have to go to Midwest fucking states. Yeah, you have to stop over. And Chicago has plastic fucking silverware. Oh no, see I don't expect. It's why. I have to go to these fucking, like I have to go to Midwest fucking states. Yeah, you have to stop over. And Chicago has plastic fucking silverware. Oh no, see I don't expect. It's horrible.

Anything above Panera Bread, I want fucking a real spoon for soup. Sorry. Fuck that. But you know what? It is a lot of the sit down places give you good stuff, but sometimes sit down places like there's a fucking, Cowboy Chow, James, C-I-A-O is the name of the restaurant.

Annoying as fuck right out of the gate. And they give you a metal tray with your fucking food on it and then plastic shit to eat out of. No, I'm sorry. It's not okay. It's not okay. I've only been there once because of that treatment. I was like, not going back to this. Not doing that, no.

Cause that makes me feel like I bought cheap shit food cause I taste plastic while I'm eating it. It feels like I'm about to that doing that no cuz that makes me feel like I bought cheap shit food cuz I taste Plastic all I mean Yeah, exactly feels like what who who's ants backyard barbecue are we at right now put out the metal forks fuck Are we doing I'm care if you don't feel like doing dishes put them out so that Steak was chewy shrimp was overdone would have had same service if I would have been seated in the bathroom I don't know what that means What fine okay?

One star from Lily first I was requested to sit at the bar I ordered sirloin steak soup and salad then I was told that the chef already dumped the soup so no soup left You should add a soup look. I don't know why that at the end of the day. Then when the sirloin steak came it lay lonely on the white plate at the end. I asked the waitress Siobhan. Maybe that's the redhead. We don't know.

I remember that Outback serves the brown bread. Also when I read the menu again, sirloin steak comes with free a free side Where are the bread and the one free side? The waitress replied if you ask I give you Huh? You you say what side do you want with that? They don't just get a ocean ask for a side That means we don't have to give her one. Haha

It's anything about that goddamn bread damn bread. What the fuck? That is wow. This restaurant should give back my money. If the waitress had such working attitude, such working attitude, I let you comment, madam, I work hard to earn my money, but what was included, it was taken off. The meat they charge. That meat charged me 1869, the meat charger, the house salad 499. Never forget that, the, never forget very only lonely meat on the big white plate. Never forget lonely meat.

That sad lonely meat sitting atop a white plate. It's burned into my memory. I cry about it from time to time the Sarah McLaughlin fucking dog rescue song comes on and the fucking one sirloin just sitting atop a lonely plate seared on one side it's the fucking she's having a baby steak of, how the hell did you get it charred to shit on one side, completely raw on the other? Oh shit. Jacob one star, we arrived at 9 a.m.

at the completely empty restaurant and were informed that lunch started at 9.30. You better hurry. We better get in there. We asked if we could sit and wait 30 minutes for lunch to start and the hostess said yes they didn't want breakfast they wanted a sirloin at 945. Our waitress then came up to us and told us we had to order. We said we wanted to wait for lunch and she said she didn't think that was allowed and had to ask her manager because customers needed to order within 15 minutes of sitting down. Oh, they've got a little turn and burn rule. Yeah. You got to order.

Get them out, get that money. That's right, which seemed like something told to her in training and not something you tell the customer. Yeah, that's something you read in the manual. You don't tell the customer, I'm supposed to kick you out and make you order in 15 minutes. They say to try to get you out of here completely in 45 is that Okay, you wash the dish then you dunk it in the rinse then you dunk it in the You have to make sure to get the sanitizer that's the important one

It's the third one that makes it clean. That's what makes it clean. She then went and grabbed a manager to go have a meeting in the back about whether or not we were allowed to wait in 30 minutes in an empty restaurant. There's not like a line waiting. We got up and left. They just gave up. And we're like, Oh, this is adults. They chose the right move. This is stupid. Um, why gives one star. Food was poorly made. Right.

Those cows suck. They made their steaks badly. I mean, it's middle of the road food. It's not going to be great. It's not great. It's better than Denny's. It's not Ruth Chris. It's fucking... It's the Outback. It's good. It's not Ruth Chris. It's fucking you know it's It's good. Yeah, it's fine. You take your kids there because you're not gonna piss away a shitload of money on a fucking $48 steak for them What you do because I'm not giving them the good shit. Yes kids can go

Waste it like you want an eight-year-old 1899 fucking sirloin meal for the kid take that little shit head. That's what you get Congrats on all a yeah, good job The fettuccine was dry with a puddle of oil at the bottom. Oh, that's what happens That's why you don't get fettuccine alfredo from the fucking outback mistake from a chain steakhouse At the bottom of it in in the takeout tray, almost no fettuccine sauce added. You know, cheese.

The steak was supposed to be medium rare and it came out dry as a bone. The shrimp had way too much salt and mostly pepper. It was also slimy when eaten, which means it was old shrimp. Yeah, that's a bad sign. Don't eat old shrimp at an airport, please. What I ordered online in the picture is not what I received. False advertisement. Either change your pictures of menu items to fit the actual meal you make at your store on your

website or find better cooks. Very displeased with service and it was purchased with a gift card for my birthday. So you didn't even pay for it. Someone gave you that and you were like, oh fuck, you know what, I have an outback card and I am stuck at the airport. May as well use this bullshit. Might as well. RP says one star, the menu has no prices for the beers.

Probably a scam. Yes, this giant chain is gonna charge you $180 for a Michelob Ultra. That's what's gonna happen, you fucking idiot. That for a Michelob Ultra. That's what's gonna happen That's how they get you. That's how they catch it and you gotta pay for it at that point You know a beer is anywhere between five and twelve dollars. It's an airport It's somewhere in there if you are worried about the exact dollar amount of the beer You should be ordering here at an airport. No, and how'd you get a... You don't have enough money to travel, man.

You came to the airport with your luggage and hefty bags and you know what, you take what you get and you shut the fuck up about it. You're worried about the, look man, it's the airport. This is worse than a fucking major league. A ballpark. Yeah, you aren't paying cheap prices. It's the movie theater prices.

There's no happy hour No, every is every hour's angry hour. It's all it's all stressful That's it I would I would want to touch this I think they mean wouldn't I wouldn't want to touch the scam house with a 40-foot pole not a 10-foot pole a scam house with a 40 foot pole, not a 10 foot pole, scam house. Look man, we have eloquent ways of saying this and you just ruin the whole thing. Fucking idiot, obviously incompetent management.

Oh obviously, yeah, because they make the menu. It's not sent from corporate, I'm sure. Right, it's not Paul Hogan. Yeah, Paul Hogan sent it from his house. That's what he printed it out on his home computer. He has one of those like 90s printers. He got prints them out on Then he laminates it right there. He's got a machine and then he ships them all off writes on the envelope Detroit Airport DT dubs

Sean one star paying customer. I hope so. What why else would you be there unless you got a gift card? Yeah Fucking thief Dine and Dasher like what are you talking about? criminal criminal criminal diner paying customer moved seat from bar to corner empty restaurant Waiter told me I needed to order more or leave even after the bus listen this is a more order table here this table you got to order for three I'm sorry even after the bartender told me I'd be fine sitting there both lied when I explained to them the situation. Unfortunately, workers match Detroit, rude and depressing, of the city.

I like Detroit. I don't have a problem with Detroit. I don't mind it. I think Detroit's fine. I don't know. I like it. I mean that casino's fucking weird, but the whole city is crazy. Stay away from that casino.

That place is insanity. They're out of mines. That's so weird. That is a wild fucking place, but everywhere else is kinda. I mean, it's a, it's a, it's a city. It's certainly a city. It's a city. Oh boy.

All right, well let's move on from there. We will leave the Detroit airport, which I'm sure many people would love to do. I don't think they wanna be stuck there. We all try. We try. And let's move along to the personal item of the week everybody.

Let's see this. We have for you today, this is, it's nothing too sexual, so don't freak out or nobody has to turn the fucking volume down here at work. This is called Monogamy the Board Game. Oh. And it says. Yeah, I mean it looks like, what is it, The Tri says, I mean, it looks like a,

what was that trip to trivial pursuit? It looks kind of like it's kind of a, yeah, it's got the squares and the rectangles. I mean, it says a hot affair with your partner. Oh, that's what it says on the box. It's a two player game. You and your gal, apparently higher, whoever monogamy board game, a multi award winning board game, making great for men and making great for men and women To bring you closer than ever making great

Would you like to making great? Yes, you can do that here It says monogamy board game It's so hard to put into words just how good the monogamy board game is and why it works so well You won't fully appreciate just how dynamic it is until you play it that's their description of it we can't explain it to you it's so hard to put into words so we decided not to that's basically what game and stay together that's it says the monogamy board game is so much more than your typical board game it's an exhilarating exchange on multiple levels that you share with the most important person in your life

It said it brings you closer the board game has already improved over 2 million relationships Make yours next Wow Yeah Everyone's happy with that Go down on your partner. They'll like you better There you go. What is this game?

Wow, 1999. All right. And you can get it tomorrow on Amazon if you want. That's right there. Right now? Right fucking now. The ideal Christmas gift for women and men. It's an engaging experience designed to bring you

and your partner closer through thought provoking questions, fun tasks, and saucy surprises. Oh, okay. Interesting. All right. Let's find out. Cards are like orders. I got it.

No, it's yeah. Maybe it tells you to go down on that. Yeah, go down on the. All right. Let's see. Five stars. Great couples game. Great game. If you use your imagination and and improvise we changed it up a little to add more spice and fun You learned a few things from this game that we hadn't discovered before. Oh

Well, that's nice. Oh, it's by the way, I forgot to read this part with over 400 unique tasks and questions The monogamy board game ensures each playthrough feels new and memorable, whether you're looking for a they keep saying Christmas gifts in every paragraph. It says it's the perfect Christmas gift. At the end, it's the perfect Christmas gift. We get it.

Who the fuck is buying this for people for Christmas? Joshua Five Stars, Lovers Advice is his title here. He says, has become one of my favorites and go-to games Definitely has spiced up our bedroom. You won't be disappointed these people are so unimaginative they need a Fucking board game to tell them how to get their partner to feel good

It's the weirdest shit ever bet if there was a marriage handbook that was issued when you got married More some of these dummies would learn how to stay together. They would they would read. Oh my god I didn't realize you should ask them how they feel about that interesting How was your day and you give them the answer then you say what about yours? That's oh They're supposed to come to oh, okay. I thought that was okay. All right now I get it I thought when I came on her face it was over. I thought that was that made her happy too. I figured you know, why not? No, okay. The movies I watch she seems to be real happy about it. They seem to be thrilled. They rub it all over

I feel like that's they must be getting getting really over on it. Right? I don't know. Then we go to sleep. Jessica five stars great Valentine's game. This is a great game for couples relatively tame It helps you connect with your partner It is change of pace from the normal and it's nice way a nice way to spice up an evening. Oh Here's another five star here. Fun hot game. It's hot. Hot. Hot game. Come up and get you a fun hot game to play with my girlfriend. I've played some other quote sexy board games in the past and based on, I didn't know they

existed. Okay. Board games? There's books and shit, but board games. And based on those experiences and this game's kind of dull name, I wasn't expecting this one to be as good as it was. Yeah, monogamy doesn't exactly sound like it. I am going to blow the roof off this place with my fucking orgasm today.

That's not what you say. I mean, it's going to come off. Monogamy is hot. Why don't you call this board game boring sex? Yeah. Vanilla. Vanilla fucking Wednesday fucking. That's vanilla Wednesday fuck.

That's what it's called. Ah, Jore Sex. That's what we're calling it. Full from Dinner. That's what it's called. Call it Are You Done Yet? Yeah. Oh man.

There are a few things that weren't to our tastes, so we just skipped over those. There's plenty of activity cards to allow for a different game experience each time, and the number of cards also allows you to customize if you like. For example, I don't drink alcohol, and there's several spaces on the game, on the game board for taking a drink.

Well yeah, that's always gonna loosen you up a little bit. And if you don't drink, I mean, what else are we supposed to do? What are you supposed to do? So those could be changed to an additional pick an activity card spaces. Okay, you can switch it up. Or just, I don't know, take a drink of something.

Take a drink of something and pretend. Take a hit of weed, fucking, have a mushroom, I don't know, do something. Calm down. Be exploratory, dear. Yeah, and you're trying to get loose and fuck, I don't know if the person's an alcoholic or whatever, if you just don't like the taste alcohol or whatever. Take a shot of soda water. Yeah loosen up if you can't drink I get it that sucks but you know diabetic or

alcoholic or some shit. To run through the game according to the usual instructions took us over an hour and then the winning fantasy card is played out. Okay, wow, so I suggest you plan on allowing at least a couple hours to play by the regular rules. Jesus This is an engaging fucking thing here. There are suggestions. Hot game. That's what that is right there. There are suggestions for abbreviated play if you don't have as much time. If you're looking for a fun and easy way to add some variety to your love life, I encourage you to try this game. Me too. I encourage you too because this sounds amazing. Three stars here, their title is not the previous English version.

What? Oh, okay. Interesting. I wonder if they mean British English or it's in like Thai I'm wondering. They got it in Spanish and they needed it in English. Yeah I mean I got it in Thai or like fucking what's that Tagalog or whatever the Filipino in some weird language you know. Okay we bought this game again after giving away the one that we were given ten years ago. Why'd you give it away? If you liked it. Here have our fuck

board. Our DNA is on this. We tried to clean it but it gets in the cracks. You know how it is. Here you go. Do you also give the rubbers when you have whiskey dick? Give those different I used it for a minute. I mean, it's fine. I didn't even finish it. You can see it's not totally unrolled, as you can see. I lost it there halfway through. It fell off because I went limp.

Sorry. It looks identical in every way except it's obvious that the cards are not the original English. What? We loved the previous cards included in the game, but these are weird. It feels like they're from a different culture or are meant as a knockoff of the original.

So basically they're written like the description of this fucking thing. Yeah, make great. Yeah, like an Asian person is yelling at you to do sexual tasks, which is a weird, might be strange unless your partner's Asian. Then you'd be like, okay, I get that I'm used to From Asia. So also the cards can be written in a way that it's obvious The writer does not speak English for example quote describe the rudest most exciting sexuality

encounter with your partner and why you enjoyed it, etc Nope. Yeah. You can get the gist but the written copy is terrible. Yeah you'd be laughing at every card. So stupid. We'd be cracking up laughing. There'd be no sex.

We'd just be dying laughing. Try to find the original simple titled A Hot Affair With Your Lover. Okay. The three stars excited about the game looking forward to playing the game soon Yeah, how about you come back when you have a fucking opinion on it? So I'll just give it I gave it three stars because it showed up three stars. I bought it. I got it Three stars didn't have much fun And then just said I think the game is boring

Yeah, cuz it's written wrong, but it's your fucking so if you're bored you're bored with your own fucking It's not their fault that you don't want to fuck your wife or whatever the fuck here It's these things sell because of things like the comma suit like we should know that yes Most people are probably not a good lay based on the fact that the Kama Sutra and the Joy of Sex are best-selling books. Oh God, in the 70s they were on people's coffee tables for cry kids were like, I remember looking through the Joy of Sex when I was a kid, it was on somebody's coffee table. People need that. And they're that well, they're that good at selling those books.

It's because we don't, most people probably don't fuck well. No, but it could be the opposite though, too It could be people that fuck real well and they really want to be like, yeah Yeah, let's do all we need to get yeah All these good things we're expanding into you know acrobatics now, you know I mean, we I want to say I hung a choice from the ceiling a different position. Yeah, totally different position Peter two stars if you're into that is the dot dot dot is the title great idea poor execution a

small amount of cards that involve additional persons What oh no, do you can't do this? Game is called monogamy. He got the mono part of it and was like, oh, this is masturbation for one person. I didn't even think about it. I thought of it like another person and the couple. Yeah. Hold on. You know what I mean?

Like additional. Because obviously all the things should be for two people. So if he's talking about additional, does he mean like a third? He needs a third. The game's called monogamy, for Christ's sake. That is really stretching the definition of that, isn't it? Have your partner sit on your friend's face. Then jerk off while you watch. Take your phone out, film it for a while.

I don't know what's happening. I don't know what's happening. A lot of roleplay cards, a good volume of camera related items, I guess take pictures, do camera stuff. In the end, if you're fine with having someone on the phone or making videos and things like that, it's decent. But in the end, a lot of the game felt uninspired with regards to the hotter portions of the game. They tell you to film, you know, you know hey you're gonna perform and whatever the fuck simple solution would be custom cards geared towards

Whatever your proclivities are but yeah, it was meh Wow, okay That's I think it's not filthy enough for him, but maybe it is while he's complaining that oh, that was the additional person So if he's that filthy, he'd be wanting thirds Okay Two stars we wanted to love it, but we're bored. Yeah, they said so we're an older couple 40s Pardon what? Fuck you. Hold on back up to that part. We're an older couple

The older couple is 67. We're an older couple The older couple is a 67. That's an older couple Liver spots and silver hair bopping into each other is fucking older couple. Maybe they're there mid something 40s is their anniversary 40 something anniversary Maybe LeBron James is still the NBA for Christ's sake what are we talking about and doing fine evidently fine Wow, so and thought this would be fun instead 70% it was 70% dance for your partner and 30% do this sex act

Okay, well, I think you want it to be the other way around right? Yeah, I think you want a to be the other way around, right? Evidently, yeah. I think you want a lot of sex acts, right? You want the cards to tell you to do something that you're too shy to say you want or whatever. I would imagine that's the point of this. Or the point of the cards is to like make you do things to like hope that the very next card is the blow job. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Instead, it's tap dance.

Now, that would be funny. Yeah. See, to someone's kind of my baby. Hello my darling. That's not I'm not really turned on by I'm so soft Got a cane in his hand back and forth the top bat. This isn't what I wanted I think they're try they I think they tried well and the idea is great But it's really tough to make a sexy game that's either not too explicit and not boring. Yeah, you gotta pick the one. It's either filthy or not.

That's it. Yeah, it's a fine line to toe there too, because it's gotta be entertaining, because otherwise it's not a board game. That's what I mean. It's gotta be filthy or funny, but it can't be. Can't be both. Sex and comedy don't go together.

No, they don't. It's amazing, because people wanna fuck funny people, but they don't want it to be funny while they and comedy don't go together. No they don't. It's amazing, because people wanna fuck funny people, but they don't want them to be funny while they're fucking, because that's. As soon as their tits are out, stop being funny. Stop being funny now, yeah. You gotta know when to turn that shit off. Because a joke is always making fun of something,

and if I'm naked and you're making fun of me, I'll fucking murder you. Now I'm mad. Not only am I not gonna fuck you, I'm gonna take you apart. Yeah, this is not gonna work. The cards are interesting and some of the ideas were fun, but I didn't go through them before because I wanted to be surprised. Instead, there were cards that were a major turnoff.

Rape fantasy, really? Which dulled the mood. Yeah, that's an odd one to throw in there. That's not fun for everybody, right? Yeah, that's a tough realization to find out your husband has. Yeah, that's a specific thing that is really not the most common. You don't want to learn that about somebody in the middle of a game. You want to do what? Jesus Christ, you sick fuck. You can't say to learn that about somebody in the middle of a game. You want to do what?

Jesus Christ you sick fuck you can't say you're just kidding you said yeah, yeah you look and your dick was hard. It's out. I watched it It was like fucking rock hard like hardest I've seen in a while Look like I was ready to pop. Eric two stars, super boring versus others. Are they playing the game like in a competitive way with somebody else? Don't do this on couples night. You two over here, us two over here, we'll see who has the best rape fantasy and go. Let's do this.

Pictionary is boring. You guys want to try monogamy together? No. We're going home. Oh, man, this person goes on to say gotta do each thing two times in a row very boring takes too long to start getting good versus others also game is very old and just updated but I think they say outdated the one card said to stick my phone inside her and call it on vibrate mode Sorry, I can't fit my iPhone inside of my wife. This would be a little strange Yeah, this is from a smaller time. They made this in 2005 put your Nokia Put your Nokia inside your wife is fine. Put your fucking iPhone 15S Pro fucking, that's the size of a tablet. Yeah, as soon as we started getting porn on phones, the screen got bigger. Weird.

Put it inside my wife, where? This is going to be a... Wow. All right, baby, we got a long night ahead of us. Let's go. Let's start working this thing You pull one side. I'll pull the other see Lainey two stars pretty tame This would be great for a newlywed Christian couple or for someone with little imagination too many space culture where couple or for someone with little imagination. Too many spaces...

Or some culture where dirty sex is not allowed. Is not allowed, yeah. That's probably where it's from. Probably, yeah, I assume, yeah. Too many spaces of, quote, do what you want and not enough spaces on the board game for do this specific action. They want to be told what to do. The thing is, there's only a few things you can really do.

I was going to say, you got a mouth, you got hands, and you got genitals. Line those all up with each other in every different way possible and that's all there is. You figured it out. You can use those to make somebody come. Figure it out. A combination of all three, one or the other, you can work on it. Check it out.

See what you like best Somewhat nice for going slower with your spouse if you're if you're used to just getting to the point so to speak Okay, if you're used to just getting right into fucking so it'll it'll put some foreplay in here shit If you're used to just doing quickies, okay if you're on that B gives it two stars oral sex focus is the top headline great gives it two stars. Oral sex focus is the top. Oh, is the headline. Great. Somebody made this just trying to get blow jobs out of his wife. Yeah, this is all the back and forth. This game is fun to try. Most of the cards are prompts for oral sex. So if that isn't your thing, then you'll be disappointed in the variety offered. Yeah. The also what did you expect there

to be in the game? If you're not an oral section oral section I'm gonna play a sex game that tells you to do shit Probably gonna tell you to put your mouth on it at some point. I would think and he's gonna probably try really hard for you, too I think yeah Tito one star not what I thought uses very explicit language and and act description It's so funny to some of these people, it's boring vanilla for a newlywed conservative Christian couple. Yeah. And then for some people,

it's this is filthy, disgusting. Yeah, this is hideous. What the fuck? Not what I thought uses that, okay. Can't even return it. That's your sex game, sorry. Absolutely. But luckily, Amazon refunded it to me anyways

and let me keep it which I could care less for it. This game is not for the older crowd or if you have a Christ based foundation. They thought it was monogamy. And they. Oh, it sounds so innocent. It sounds like, think about it. Yeah, like they didn't like read the box or anything.

They just saw a good Christmas present. This is great. Good Christmas present about monogamy. You talk about like how joyous it was when your second son was born and stuff like that. Now it was, suck it. They're like oh they want you to put my, it says to put my phone in you. I don't understand. Martha where, I don't think I could put my phone in you. I don't understand Martha where I don't think I could fit my phone in you my suppose. I don't understand this I don't understand just never mind. I Just thought it would be fun to play just fun to play with my wife But they talk about some nasty things in the game that honestly, I don't even want to read His wife has never came ever. Never once. Never. Or he now can't return his phone because the water feature

has been indicated. It's been indicated. This thing has been so... She's not wet. What are you kidding me? This guy, he walks into a room and things just fucking like a desert. Every drop of moisture in the room just disintegrates. When he walks in, man, Holy shit. Uh, fee gives one star doing too much to be drinking and trying to be sexual Okay, I think cuz they make try to make you drink and fuck which is the point of the game Wow Overall we could hardly even read the cards some of the cards we read did not didn't not make us want each other

Didn't not make us want each other Didn't not make us want each other Okay moral more like hell no Not doing that it was too much going on for a romantic game not happy at all We didn't play the game 15 to 20 minutes and realize not a couples game I think it absolutely is a couple's game It says to blow your partner. That's where Now Barry is phoning you lady. Yeah, what do you want? Now stuck with it now. I find out it's non-refundable

They must have been getting them returned because of the same thing from now. It's just yeah You're gonna be sticking cards in the parts of the board disappointing game from miss Aloha one star Disappointed three exclamation points we threw away so many cards because they were on They were beyond cheesy and a lot had to do with sucking toes and armpits and fingers what? The fuck you don't say anything do with anybody's armpit or toes or finger. I don't know what the hell. Tongue a pit?

Yeah. Here's a real fucking niche fetish that 2% of the population has. Maybe one of you is in this. That's a different thing. That's what they're swinging for, right? They've got to. Maybe some are into that, but it wasn't really exciting for us. We really only use the intimate cards because they're sweet, sexy, and can actually use

the majority of these cards without throwing them away. Wish I could return after opening since that's the only way I know if you like this game or not. Probably won't play again. Okay, good. Alright, good for you. One star bought this game thinking it would be fun. Bought a couple other fun games as well that are way better. This game is so male chauvinist that it was ridiculous to play. Tried to return it and they don't accept returns too embarrassed to even give it as a gift very male-dominated

Don't buy it humiliates women Okay, Paul gives one star too off-color Yeah, too dirty bummed I wasted the money neither my wife nor I were happy with this the messages put your mind in the gutter Would not wreck. Yes, because you're fucking your wife. You're allowed to be in the gutter. That's the point when you're Married to someone you're fucking them you could do you guys can do whatever you want have a ball You're fucking expect the cards to say try to procreate like that's not so Yeah the cards to say try to procreate like that's not hot. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, try to make a child you can then give to Christ I don't think is what you want the

card to say. Makes it real hard to come when the word child is involved. A little bit, a little bit. Holy fuck, okay, sailor gives one star. So many bad cards. Oh, the sailor gives one star so many bad cards. Oh Okay, I had a hundred and fifty seven cards to throw away 86 we are keeping they counted that one two three four five one fifty five one fifty six one two seven okay one What is that two hundred and thirty three there's two hundred and thirty three cars two3 cards 243 cards I would think right 100 and what hundred and eighties hundred fifty seven and eighty six

So that would be a damn 80s 143. That's 143. Oh one for three get it. I love you. That's Say we went through the cards ahead of time which I would suggest We are really into each other and fantasies about other people are not going to turn us on. Oh there is stuff about extra people Tell us who? Tell me which one of your friends you want to fuck your most. Yeah, that's a Which one of my friends has the best tits is a strange question. Ask your husband. You're not gonna like You know it's in there we know it You know it's in there we know it is. You know it's in there you know it is. Tell us about which Starbucks barista you have fucking jerked off to in the last two weeks. Which person that you see regularly in your day do you want to sleep with? Do you picture naked? Any of those things. This is just gonna cause problems. Right right in the heart, no. Oh God, we are also not into foot stuff and there's a lot of foot cards.

A lot. That one is a lot. I don't know. Yes, foot, that is not a typo. Because that's what they put, I guess, foot. What did we think it was? Some of these things, some of these can get you in trouble with the police.

Huh? Oh, the rape fantasies. No, no, there are several, several for doing things in public. Yeah. Okay. Sexual, that can get you on a list. A very bad list. Having those things.

Grab the dog. Yeah, that is, it's the dog involved? Is that one of the extras? Oh my God. 203 people found that helpful, by the way. On Amazon. That's a, that is a mass fucking audience there. Oh my God, 203 people found that helpful, by the way, on Amazon. That's a mass fucking audience there.

203 is a lot. That is mass appeal there. Okay, so we're all horned up, I guess. We've been arrested. We've been arrested. I don't have my phone anymore, that's gone. Gonna have to go to the hospital to get that back, so that's a problem. Stop calling it, my ass is sore.

Stop calling it. Ha ha ha. to go to the hospital to get that back so that's a problem. Stop calling it my ass is sore. So we've had a frustrating experience at the Detroit Airport. We need to relax a little bit. Let's go get some sunshine. Let's go to the park shall we? We're going to Los Altos Park which is in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Oh no, they have a park? They have grass? They have a park? It's the capital of the city.

I can't believe they've got grass. They have a park? Didn't say there was grass, there's a park. There's an area. 4.1 stars. The city park offering lots of recreation options from an indoor swimming pool to a skate park. I didn't hear grass anywhere.

I did not. I did not. It's open. It's a 10100 Lomas Boulevard, Northeast, Albuquerque. And I mean, it just looks like an open field, basically. This is New Mexico. There's not much going on. They got a skate park, that's impressive.

That's kind of fun, yeah. This one is five stars, probably the best ball fields in New Mexico. Really? The whole state, best ball fields. Really? Wow, they must have grass. It's the only place in the state with grass, I think.

They have grass. I showed up, there's green stuff on the ground, it was wild, never saw it before. Evidently keep all the state's tax money here. This park. To grow grass. Says clean bathrooms and water fountains, they actually have cages around the water fountains

to keep them locked during when the parks are not open. What, why? Why? Stealing a fucking water fountain. Yeah, or water, don't let them have water when we're not open is a weird thing Thomas four stars good venue for weddings and parties. There's a big indoor thing here as a vendor easy load in great location This is a fucking like a caterer The two ladies that run it are kind of rude though

Yeah, and look at it. It looks like a big fucking like an Amazon fulfillment center inside It's just a big oh wow it's got exposed steel girders, but they're not even that high Real weird looking building man It looks like one of those Barn Dominiums, but like the yeah, but bigger exposed that's weird. Yeah, like a big one of those barn dominiums, but like the yeah, but bigger exposed. That's weird Yeah, like a big one of those Mike four stars Respect others and they'll respect you Fafo it's lumpy old and has a lot of flat but it's my home park and I love it

Fuck around and find out fuck around and find out respect others and they love it. Fuck around and find out? Fuck around and find out. Respect others and they'll respect you. Fuck around and find out. It's lumpy, old, and has a lot of flat, but it's my home park, I love it. I don't know what they're talking about. But the picture of this person is going off a ramp on a skateboard.

So. Yeah, so it's his skate park, yeah. It's his, yeah, he goes for the skate park and has lots of flat, which is why that's no good on a skate park that makes sense Okay, lumpy lumpy. Yeah lumpy so that me get bumpy in this Javier two stars nice park sadly seems like tent city I was doing my morning walk, and I thought I check out the park saw a man painting his truck with spray cans

Saw a man painting his truck with spray cans. It's a new paint job at the park. Holy shit, with spray paint. That'll work. The rattle can. Holy shit. I'm going out in the park to paint the truck. I'll be back. What the fuck?

That tells me that man has committed a crime and needs that car in new color. Now, right now. And you don't even have the 399 or whatever that fucking one place charge is. Yeah, Earl Shy won't touch your shit. That's the least weird thing that happened to this person at the park, apparently.

A lady asked where she could find meth and told for me she said not good I should try one day. Russell 2 stars great place to catch hepatitis C from a stray needle or to be accosted by the large homeless population. You never like it when there's like needles around that's never good. Javier 2 stars need to be cleaned a lot of litter and porta potties up to the rim in poop literally. There will be poop. Oh my god there are.

To the rim. Porta potties in your park not only are there porta pott. Oh my god. There are to the rim bodies in your park Not only other porta potties. They are full to the rim Not full of the bottom full To the cap where you got to get above it if you want to shit You just know sitting on it you're sitting in shit at that point to the rim like a fucking cup of coffee. That's crazy. Like a decent martini right to the top. Right to the seat. Oh and poop literally by the way is my favorite. Literal poop. I don't know why that makes me so fucking happy. Jay, one

star, this park used to be very nice and clean facility that you could bring a family out for a good time Apparently not now. I mean that's what all parks used to be I mean now I mean, yeah, have you been to a park recently that you're like? Oh, this is the shit. This is the best greatest There's nothing they don't exist anymore. I mean there's some if you go to like is Is there? I guess it just depends on where you are. That's all. Yeah. In Phoenix, no. They're all shitty. No, no, no. San Diego. You can't do it. No, like around me there's nice parks. You can go... Is there? Yeah, we can go to the fucking, the Vanderbilt mansion is a national park. You walk around, the FDR built, you know, all that. You can go anywhere. It's pretty, but not here apparently. This is Albuquerque too, so. Yeah, Albuquerque's gonna be full of,

any park there, it's gonna be bad. It's a shame how horrible this has gone downhill. Lots of drug use, homeless and crime at an all-time high. I would not feel safe bringing my family out here. Be smart and stay away or stay alert at all times. Monique One Star star this park is disgusting Exclamation from the numerous homeless people who live here to the dirty playground If you take a child here, you have to continually check for needles from people using drugs under bleachers

You also have to watch out for the rats that live under the bleachers. Well, they love the needles. They're heroin rats What do you want? Fentanyl rats. You gotta look out for them. They're real nasty. Not during the day, right? They fucking hope not. You taking your kids to a playground at night? That's creepy.

Unless they're so fucked up on heroin, those things have lost time of the day. That's what I mean. They're fentanyl rats. They don't know what's going on. Do not go, do not go here by yourself due to the high probability you might get attacked. Beware.

Yeah, I guess if you're a single woman, you probably shouldn't go there. You know on the farm you get a rooster that wakes you up in Albuquerque, it's a meth rat. It's a meth rat. Gnawing on your eyebrow. It just growls real loud and wakes everybody up. What is that?

Jesus Christ. Okay, Amanda one star. The sheer number of men obviously high on drugs congregating in large groups at all hours of day and night is uncomfortable and feels threatening. Don't take your kids to the park on the south end. The last visit we found syringes and there was a small strong smell of urine from the grass." Well that's just that's just you know a chlorophyll, you know that's a mixture there. That's probably how Albuquerque waters. Yeah I think that's just photosynthesis happening really right at that point. Albuquerque irrigation is probably just flush the toilet into the yard.

That might be it. There we go now it's getting green. Now it'll grow. Here's one star. The park is great. The pool was taken over by a bunch of people doing water exercises in the shallow end forcing the kids into the deep end. Not going back. Two of my kids drowned. Not going back. water exercises in the shallow end, forcing the kids into the deep end.

Not going back. Two of my kids drowned, not going back. Lost a couple. Never going to find them, they're under there. Gretchen won star, it was okay. Had to leave the park 15 minutes after we got there because some teens started smoking weed and I don't want my kiddos around that. Okay.

Okay, well the teens are going to do something you don't want my kiddos around that. Okay. Okay, well the teens are gonna do something you don't like everywhere. You see a teen, they're doing shit you don't want your kids to see. You could just walk away. Yeah. It's not gonna, it's fine. It won't follow you.

No, no, it'll be fine. Your kids will survive. Matt, one star, they wouldn't even have noticed unless you pointed it out. Unless you said something. You're the one that caused them to notice it. Matt, one star they wouldn't even have noticed unless you pointed it out That's the thing you're the one that caused them to notice it Matt one star really disappointing trash everywhere now. They mean garbage or people I'm not sure but we'll find out only one garbage can at the front and no liner in it looks like no one maintains it

feces in the planters oh No, the homeless people are just shitting outside? Shitting in the planters because, you know, it sits up a little bit. You can use it like a toilet. You can rest. Yeah. Lean your thighs against it.

Yeah. So there will be a lot of poop in this episode. Definitely, god damn. And saw at one point what looked like a drug exchange. Yeah, probably was a drug exchange, that's why. Good reason. Here is one, one star, too many vagrants. They congregate in the parking lots.

Last visit, a lady was wandering the park with her pants down around her knees. I will not bring my children here. Yeah, this is. You're supposed to put a dollar in there, friend. Yeah, maybe that's what she was looking for. Christie, one star, very dangerous, saw two needles on the grass and a man passed out.

Well, that's from those needles. That's what I'll do to you. Not recommended for children. You know, a park that's not recommended for children. Children, don't go to the playground. Whatever you do. There's really not a lot you can do that's free with your children anymore.

If you wanna take your kid out, you gotta go pay for something. You gotta pay for it. Yeah, this is free is what this is. That's the thing. Otherwise you get this for free. Yeah, cause it's free for everyone. That's the thing.

So it's free for them too. There's no bouncer. There's no, that's, yeah, free for whoever. It's free for the lady with the pussy out. It's free for everybody. Free for everybody. free for that couple play a monogamy under that tree Sucking each other's feet or whatever the fuck the bones up their ass phones up their asses calling each other and shit on other phones

They went and got burner phones just to call the other phones Oh god. It's fucking ridiculous. Yeah, just a little fucking A little boost mobile Just a fucking Alright, Robert one star Stay away from this place because The junkies, because between the junkies

And the homeless people and the alcoholics They're probably a I was going to say That's probably a tossed salad I believe right there So I'm going to get, you know what I mean? Between the lettuce and the tomato and the cucumbers, I mean they're all mixed together at this point. I don't know, it's all a salad.

It's hard to find an onion. Yeah. There's no place to take anyone who isn't well armed and ready for a confrontation. Is that right? That doesn't seem like park behavior. No. Okay, Megas, one star, they use the sprinkler system on homeless during cold nights and try to hurt them. Okay?

All right. Or they water at night like most parks do. Every park did. When I lived by that park in Phoenix, they watered it every fucking night. They'd come on and the homeless people would move. They knew it was coming. They'd scatter Taylor one star be prepared to get robbed the second you leave your car You got everything. Okay, click bang. Oh shit. Okay. Here's the car keys. Never mind

And then maybe my favorite review of every time we look at reviews, I love this review BL one star we didn't go here Great. Thanks for fucking leaving a review asshole. You made a good movie. Yeah, I Didn't go here had enough meth for now So we'll do that and we'll leave off we had another one here, but we'll continue with that next week. Yeah, we're going to do next week. We'll do the, it's the bull outside the stock exchange in New York City. The bull with the balls.

Yeah. There's so many pictures like closeups of the balls. It's ridiculous. Why do we do that? So much ball talk on that one. I can't wait to do that. Right. So join us next week for that and all sorts of other new shit

Of course new reviews every week listen to crime in sports on Monday nights Listen to small-town murder on Wednesday and Friday nights You can listen to it both days because there's two episodes there and obviously follow us on all the social media Tell your friends tell everybody post about the show. It helps us tremendously tell your friends, tell everybody, post about the show. It helps us tremendously. So yeah, you want info on all of our stuff here, you can check it out at ShutUpAndGiveMeMurder.com. That said, thank you so much for joining us. Watch out where you stick your phone and we will see you next week. Follow your stupid opinions on the Wondery app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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