Your Stupid Opinions - Dead Guys In The Bathroom, Not So Enchanted Santa, A Personal Tail

Episode Date: December 11, 2023

This week, we find out about a Santa's forest, that seems anything but enchanted. A tail, that comes out of a very personal place. A Target, where the employees watch everyone, except the people who die in the bathroom. A down home chicken experience, for the Irish & much more!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie WhismanSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello, everybody. Thank you for joining us again on Your Stupid Opinions. Hey! Hello. My name is James Petrogallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman.

Thank you again for joining us. We are very excited for more crazy and often stupid opinions today. People will be... We have some holiday-themed things here. Oh, great. We have definitely a very personal corner, very personal item in our personal item corner this weekend. This thing goes right in the corner, let me tell you something. It's insane.

But before we get to that quickly, just go ahead and why don't you follow us on our pages there. We have Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and everything like that. So follow us and get all the latest news. And also, too, they have a lot of the listeners now. They have groups on Facebook, too, and they post a ton of their own stuff on there. It's a good time. So get involved and hang out with us and do that. But never mind all of that.

Let's get right to it. What do you say, everybody? Because we have a full show for you. First off, you know what? It's that time of season here. Is it? Tis of season here is it it is the season everyone so let's head to enchant santa's enchanted forest what do you say let's do this let's get some christmas stuff it's first of all when i think of a santa i think of a forest which

is not what i think of is that i mean i guess if it's at the north pole i guess that's where his stuff is at but there's what trees are up there it's at the North Pole, I guess that's where his stuff is at. But there's, what trees are up there? It's just ice. I don't know. I feel like his is more of a fortress of solitude more than like a cabin in the woods. You know what I mean? Yeah, I've never seen any movie that showed trees.

It's just frozen tundra. Nothing grows. And then Enchanted. What's Enchanted? Enchanted, was there pixies and fairies? It's Santa. What are we mixing? Magic. Well, you know why? It's because this is in Miami. What's Enchanted? Enchanted? Was there pixies and fairies? It's Santa. What are we mixing? Magic.

Well, you know why? It's because this is in Miami. That's why. No. Yeah, this is 7900 Bird Road Tropical Park, Miami. And they've got an enchanted forest in Miami. A Santa's enchanted forest. Because when I think of Santa and forests, I think of, obviously, Miami.

Miami, yeah. So it said, we'll open November 9th. It's already open now. Santa's Enchanted Forest is the world's largest holiday theme park with over 100 rides, shows, games, and attractions. Oh, no. This is a giant thing. So let's find out what people think here. Could be wonderful.

I mean, this could be a Christmas wonderland. You know what I mean here um could be wonderful i mean this could be a christmas wonderland you know what i mean it could be great yeah but so colorado springs has the north pole which is a a christmas themed uh theme park there it's horrifying well yeah it's it's it's private owned this is not yeah exactly so scary this is gonna be a scary one let's find out here what people think all right number one here here we go one. Let's find out here what people think. All right. All right. Number one here. Here we go. Five stars. Let's get a couple of people who love it first.

Five stars. Are there vegan options is the title here? Yeah. Okay. Lots of fun. And yes, there is vegan food. There is. There is. So that question is answered.

Someone asked in the Q&A if there are vegan options, and someone really rudely responded with incorrect information. Yeah, it's a message board that people are terrible. Have you ever been on the Internet before? People were rude to me. Strangers. First day. Strangers on the Internet with incorrect information, and now I can't reply with the correct info, so I'm leaving it in a review.

There are typical vegan amusement park options like corn on a stick. Yeah, that's, here's some corn. That's vegan. Yeah, there's nothing there. Popcorn, french fries, cotton candy, lemonade, et cetera. But also, there was a taco shop that had a vegan taco. We ate before we came because someone said there was no vegan food but there totally is okay there totally is brah not enough to skip dinner for but plenty of treats and snacks okay there we go that is wonderful and uh finally finally another five

star because there's not a lot of five stars here. Five stars, missing Santa's Enchanted Forest. Oh, it's been a minute. I haven't been in a while. You haven't been. I'd like to get back. It's our family tradition. So sad to see all those beautiful lights and Christmas feel this year. I hope the mayor of Miami can find a place for this gorgeous place and not left it in the shadows.

I don't know if it closed down for a year or something. Oh. That was one. Okay. Or he shafted it to like a terrible part of the shadows. I don't know if it closed down for a year or something. Oh. That was one. Okay. Or he shafted it to like a terrible part of the neighborhood. He just put it in a trailer park nearby. It's an enchanted trailer park. There we go.

One star. Here we are. Oh, boy. It's one star. Santa's Enchanted Forest is such a horrible place. Okay. All right. Santa Enchanted Forest is such a horrible place. Okay. All right. Santa Enchanted Forest is not worth the money.

Mind you, it is located next to the dump site. That's a challenge. It isn't a bad place. Yes, of course it is. Where else do they have room where nothing... If it's a good location, something's been built on it before. You think they got room for a seasonal theme park? No, that goes next to the dump where no one wants it.

It is filled with mud. Most of the rides do not work. Wow. There are only a few Christmas lights. Do not bother. It's almost like Miami isn't the most Christmassy place there is. Weird. Here's one. One star. Avoid at all cost.

And it's too expensive for what you get here we go uh the place is dismal at best that's a good one at best dirty poorly organized very old and in decay yeah the characters that handle the carnival because that's what this place is what are they carnies is what they are were disheveled and creepy yes carnies you just described carnies listen to small town murder we had a carnival mafia this these are carnies and then they say right out of joe dirt's movie and hardly spoke english at all awesome so they found the rednecks who don't speak english which is a that's a tough find. Yeah.

Somebody came, this person came to this amusement park with the wrong state of mind. I think the first person that comes, that has this as like a tradition that they do, they go to laugh about how fucking awful this is. Yeah, this is terrible. We go every year. This person drove down from Orlando, I think. They had been a lot to Disney World, and they're like, it's going to be just like Disney. And then they showed up, and they're like,

oh, my God, what's going on? So I don't know how they're both Joe Dirt and don't speak English. Maybe they don't understand their redneck, you know, particular dialect at that point. There is a guy in that movie that doesn't speak English. Maybe that's who they mean. Maybe. I'm not sure.

I suspect that ICE ought to visit this place. That's the, if you're from another country, that's the immigration people, ought to visit this place every now and then to raid it on behalf of the Department of Labor. Do you ever think no one else will work at this fucking shithole? You ever think of that? Possibly also that that's a problem. If they did that, that

no one would be here. And then you'd show up and go, there's no employees. So you can't be pleased. Here's three stars. This is fun, though. Susie says, watch out for the WeWorkForTips bathroom people. What is this, a nightclub now condoms cologne sir what can

i give you somebody smuggled that shit in and then what set up shop in the bathroom yeah they probably just do it not authorized or anything just people show up customers their backpack yeah their investment is their ticket price to get in the door. Here we go. Well, this was our first time at Santa's Enchanted Forest, but we've been waiting to go for years. It was okay. Rides were good and there was plenty of food vendors, but look out for the bathroom people. They expect you to pay, those are in caps by the way, just to use the bathroom. And every single sentence is multiple exclamation points, not just one.

Multiple. It was very uncomfortable and all caps, weird, three exclamation points. It is weird that a man went to the toilet. It's very strange that his job is to inhale shit fumes all night. That's a strange job. Throw a dollar at the man and walk out. And he just stands there like yeah i'm in the bathroom and it's weird i understand like can i sell you something no you

know how you don't want me here guess what i don't want me here neither would you like to buy cigarettes no not from the guy in the bathroom there's shit flecks all over him i don't want cigarettes from you uh definitely put a bad taste in the experience well you're not supposed to taste it in the bathroom anyway so that's why that's three exclamation points by the way for that one yeah yeah uh i didn't think i was at the four seasons was i and then that's one two three four five six question marks that's a person that's never stayed at a four seasons no because i don't i think they'll leave you alone in the shitter at the four seasons fuck alone everywhere i think it's just nightclubs that do that.

It's one of those deals in restaurants that are annoying. Nightclubs and strip clubs. If it says club at the end, it's probably got one of those. It's where guys are trying to get women to fuck them. So when they leave the bathroom, they have to have some guy like, you need some cologne and you need this. And they're like, oh, I do? Oh, shit, okay.

They need a friend to look them over. Yeah, look them over and make sure that they're presentable. Yeah, now the ladies will fuck you and they send you back out there $2 lighter. It's the best I can do for you. Anyway, the kids had fun and the lights were beautiful. Okay, that's the event. There it is. The fucking Santa's Enchanted fucking forest.

That's what you're there for. It's not for you. It's for the children to look at the goddamn lights and for all of you to go, those were nice lights, and you leave. This is not supposed to be... Kids, did you have a good time? Then it was worth it.

God, Jesus, it's not Mount Everest. It's a fucking Santa's Enchanted Forest next to the dump in Miami. If the lights are nice, call it a win. But they say, but, in all caps, I had expected something a little more upscale for the price upscale. I got to know how much it is and not so carnival feeling. Some of the workers were definitely quote and that all caps. I'm sorry, not into working there. Yeah, really at a carnival with your shitty kids around complaining about it?

At a private carnival that doesn't move. Yeah, doesn't, wow. Private carnival. Okay, here's a one star. Disappointed,

is there? Yeah. It sounds like it. Disorganized and poor quality of service everywhere. This sounds like every carnival

you've ever been to. Yeah. It's not, we lost one of the red bandage after paying a lot for passes red bandage i don't know what that is just a band again probably a band wristband yeah i had to go back and ask to please replace my bandage because none allowed me to ride ridiculous even when i showed my purchases over the phone i won't go back a waste of money and time long lines poor quality service and food

shit my bandage okay here we go okay one star this person has a lot to say all right here we go this place is an abomination is the title an abomination not just a little disappointed i don't know the lights were kind of crappy an abomination how dare they a little disappointed. I don't know. The lights were kind of crappy. An abomination. How dare they use so much hyperbole when describing this abomination. You walk in with your kids. Santa punches them right in the face, both of them. He goes, I don't give a shit what you want for Christmas, motherfucker. And then he spits on them.

Then he says a whole bunch of shit in Spanish and walks away. I feel like that's what this person's review is. Call my mother-in-law puto it was wild enter at your own risk yeah okay then it says give up already charging 60 for entrance okay per person a dollar figure yeah per person that is that sounds crazy um no it's not that is steep yeah, well, we'll get to the whole thing here. Okay, Busch Gardens or SeaWorld charges $65. Get the fuck out of here. I hope they said that right in their face as they left. Get the fuck out of here.

Busch Gardens charges $65. You're not Busch Gardens. SeaWorld has, they train giant sea animals that weigh tons to fucking do flips for our entertainment and they charge $65. This is crazy. SeaWorld abuses animals for $65. They will fucking, they will break an animal

spirit. They'll break a majestic ocean creature spirit for $65. you got some lights and a santa that doesn't even have a beard this is pathetic you're trying to break my spirit i won't allow it not my christmas spirit then it says fast pass question mark ha ha you guys are a joke and the park is a dump no it's right next to the dump. I already said that. Come on, guys. The parking is in the dump. Keep up already, yeah. What a rip-off and disgrace.

Disgracia! Fucking disgrace. Wow. No shame. No shame. They have no shame. Bringing the same old shitty rides back that you had in 1996.

Park is all dirty. The bathroom is nasty. The bathroom should be great. There's a guy hanging out in there the whole time. Poor bastard's hanging out in the nasty bathroom. I feel like someone just, there was a pervert there that day, and that person encountered him. Like, it's really weird. He comes in.

He says he has to watch the pee leave your dick. It's weird. He was weird. Make sure it's really weird. He comes in. He says he has to watch the pee leave your dick. It's weird. He was weird. Make sure it doesn't drip. He said just to make sure. He's very full service. I don't know. I will be filing a formal complaint to the Chamber of Commerce about your unenchanted dump.

Unenchanted. Unenchanted. Disgraceful. Abomination. Abomination is the first thing. He's really got it. You should have left the entrance $15 for kids, $25 for adults, and charge of $35 for your fast pass. Apparently, it's $60 to get the VIP, whatever the fuck.

Okay. That was more tolerable. Keep it a seasonal fare, which is what you guys are since the 80s. You are not Disney, Busch Gardens, etc. $60? Three question marks? That's crazy. I read in one of your responses last year, reviews in reference to the Fast Pass, you wrote,

other park attractions like Disney have options and so do we. Ha ha ha, you guys are delusional. Delusional abomination. Disgraceful. He's laughing. Glorified Chuck E. Cheese. That's what you guys are. Readers, you have been warned.

Wow. That's the best review I've ever heard. That guy is fucking pissed. Not joking. Let's do some more. Fuck it. I like this one. Okay. One star. Please save your money money it's not worth it went in with my six-year-old daughter my mother who is a senior and my

girlfriend okay even using a coupon for my daughter still paid over a hundred dollars to get in there is no just entrance fee even if my mother does not ride anything, still got to pay full prices as someone who rides everything. Okay, it's just a one. It's like Disneyland. They don't go, well, what are you going to do in here and then adjust a price for you. You enter the park. I'm just going to walk. If you don't want to ride all the rides, maybe don't come because it's not a good bargain for you.

We're just a bunch of seniors. We'd rather walk here than the mall. That's all. Jesus. They claim because the shows whatever we were already there we went on a weekday not too many people now the quote park itself is horrible old rusty rides dirty nothing good to be honest don't know why maybe because of safety issues height requirements were more now than previous years, which is scary. You have to be taller now?

Well, now they're having height restrictions. That tells me that somebody got hurt, man. Every rule at this park is written in blood, man. If you have to do something, it's just somebody got hurt or died. That's what happened. A kid got his head taken off and they were like, well, a little taller, I guess. That's still under the lap belt. That's what happened. A kid got his head taken off and they were like, well, a little taller, I guess. That's still under the lap belt. Raising two inches.

Every time a kid gets killed, it's two more inches they put on it. My daughter was not able to get on the rides. Asked for a refund and was told the sign up front says no refunds. Well, the sign up front does not tell you how crappy the place is with old, rusty, and dirty rides. If we're going to talk about signs up front, let's be honest about everything is what he's saying. The sign should have said this, too. Oh, my God. My girlfriend took my daughter to the bathroom, and the rude attendant, apparently there's people there,

was banging on someone's door telling them to get out and they've been using the restroom too long what the fuck is that about wipe and get out get out what are you shooting up in there jesus christ uh one star gross and unenchanted just an overpriced carnival parking a nightmare an ear of corn nine nothing pretty about it, low-end rides and masses of rude people. Yeah, that's Florida you just described, I believe. You just said, hey, look, Florida. Not beautiful scenery at all. Yeah, non-trademarked festival, carnival.

That's what it's going to be. It's going to be bad. What do you expect? And then here we go. This is wonderful. One star, a nightmare. First line, LIVID! Four exclamation points.

Okay. The ride staff are the, all caps, most disrespectful and rudest people I have ever encountered in what's supposed to be a cheerful carnival. Beyond cheerful, it's supposed to be enchanted, for Christ's sake. That makes cheerful look like shit.

This is the best. One staffer asked my 12-year-old son why he was yelling like a bitch. Why are you yelling like a bitch, kid? Oh, my God. That's the greatest line ever in a review you yell like a bitch do you mean like his voice hasn't cracked he's got a high-pitched voice you're acting like a little bitch right now is what he said which is your place as the staffer of an enchanted forest to tell a 12 year old that I yell like a little bitch I yell like a little bitch

and at another ride a staffer made my son sit between the legs of a total stranger after he kept saying no I can't it's cause he's a little bitch she's a little bitch

she literally physically pushed him while I was yelling at her and she ignored me until another family member caught on and stopped the situation. It was a lady that called him a little bitch. A little bitch. No, that was a separate one. One staffer.

This is a different staffer. Oh, my God. So those are two separate people. Unbelievable. And then the bathroom attendant said, quit your shitting in there. Let's go. Okay. the bathroom attendant said quit your shitting in there let's go um okay the loud reggaeton blasting at the large christmas tree in the center of the carnival took away from the christmas vibe it was an epic fail yeah fucking reggaeton playing around the christmas tree because that's

that's unless it's like a reggaeton rudolph the red-nosed reindeer then i'm okay with i guess because at least you're in the ballpark. That is the funniest. I can't believe that's the theme music they have in here. Again, we're in Miami. It's just kind of what it is. So, yeah, there are countless reviews of I hate this place. Literally, I hate it here, people say.

They said they only have one place that didn't even want to use the restroom here as they only have porta potties. I don't think we're. How's the bathroom attendant in the porta potty with you? I don't understand that. And there's no sinks, which doesn't sound legal. I think you have to have to have a place where somebody washes their hands. I think there's laws about how many sinks per toilet you have to have. Like, you know, that's that's like a law in a public venue.

Is that is that federal or is that state? In Florida. Yeah. In Florida, they go, if you dig a hole deep enough, just poop in it and you don't need no sinks. One in Florida. One in Florida. Shit next to the dump and right in the floor. OK, so we will do one more here and get it over with one star here

not worth visiting and i'm going to skip to this okay i was this is amazing we were headed to another area with the attraction and ran into a massive crowd and then horde it says in in parentheses of people no no he said h-o-r-d-e which is not not the common spelling that we're looking for here enter the attraction and they and they we pushing okay what i was heading in the opposite direction and was almost trampled there and this is the wrong there of course there were children who were being pushed and toddlers and carriages who almost got injured. Toddlers always almost injured. They're teetering always. Without anybody around, they're almost injured.

Two-year-old standing there is almost injured. Almost. Any fucking second, something can happen. And I got my fingers crossed. Come on and fall. It took me over 20 minutes to walk where I was heading, which was a distance of about 60 feet. I then ran into another area further away, and once again it happened again, and this time it took over 30 minutes to walk 100 feet.

How many people are there? Thousands? 30 minutes? Yeah. That's thousands of people. 100 feet? 100 feet. I informed the security personnel, and they only asked, is someone fighting or injured?

Because that's the normal there. That's all I do. Someone been injured from fighting? I told them they needed to get there soon as someone may get injured and a fight may erupt soon due to the given situation. And they said, we'll go there soon. And then they took their time. Another lady had a Target shopping cart as she headed into the crowd of people.

You have been forewarned. How did she get a Target shopping cart in a target this place is just a disaster this is i would say take enchanted out of the title at least it's not enchanted you've got grocery carts from from big box stores inside in the car i don't think you're gonna get a big lots grocery cart or a fucking costco cart Disneyland. At that center? Probably not. I don't think they're going to let you have that. God, Jesus. So next up, let's go outside of Boston here to a Target.

Let's go to Target outside of Boston. Where the cart was from. Where the cart was from. That's why we're doing it. That's exactly why we're going there. I was like, well, this goes here, I guess. You know, it's one of those. This is at 7 All state road in dorchester

massachusetts okay just outside boston let's get into this um this is a interesting target um one some people love it five stars big store big selection sadly outside is a lot of junkies crawling around south hampton street crawling just, scratching. Slithering. Yeah, I picture them just with their fingers like they're clawing, like trying to escape a murder. The store itself is amazing, but you do have to be careful in the Target restroom, needle disposal box in parentheses, which every restroom has because diabetics also go. It's not just for junkies.

It legally has to be there. Also for diabetics. Right. They didn't put a biohazard box on the wall and be like, you know, we've had a lot of junkies. So put them in here, guys. No, no. Junkies usually aren't going to put their needles in there, but diabetics might. That's the point.

Yes. Outside to the right of the store, trash and junkies laying around. This is a five-star review, mind you. This is five stars. Greatest place ever place ever junkies all over the place and even the parking lot since the junkies can look for cars uh looking to break into them trust me it happens that's all caps by the way um but target has a great selection of just anything you were looking for it's a target but it's in the middle of a wow you'll notice they

have the medicines locked up simply because the junkies come in looking to steal. Oh, my God. How many times is the word junkies said in that? One, two, three, I think four. That's a lot of junkies. Okay. And then here's five stars. I think they just know someone who works there because they mention them by name.

How often do you remember a Target employee's name after the fact? Max was very helpful and knowledgeable, not to mention friendly that max is a hell of a guy check out his ass if you don't mind he's got a pretty good can on him too uh he took the time to answer my questions and i was more educated and satisfied when i left not even about target items he just told her about the you know the ottoman empire a little bit um they talked told her about the Ottoman Empire a little bit. They talked about medicine. Alexander the Great is a very interesting person. They talked about how to pronounce Genghis or Genghis Khan.

They were talking about that for a while. It was a very historical conversation. Learned about Ferdinand, that guy that started the war. Yeah, yeah, World War I there. Archbishop or something. Yeah. Here's one star. Now it comes. All right. Quote, the lady at the self. Yeah, yeah. World War I there. Archbishop or something. Yeah. Here's one star. Now it comes.

All right. Quote, the lady at the self-checkout today refused to sell me the item that they put on the shelves for clearance. She said they are not in the system and should be removed. She took the items back. Okay. She also didn't believe that the item's at that low price and thinking i'm telling a lie they found stuff in clearance she said these shouldn't even be for sale which right well if i'm trying to pay you for it what do you think my scam is i bring things in then that i already own

and then try to give you money for them what's the fucking scam here exactly i'm giving you money i'm trying to buy something yeah and this product's product. Yeah. I've never heard of that before. And this product's too low? I don't know. It's marked for that. You can't do anything about that. That's false advertisement. I win either way. You said it's not even for sale, for Christ's sake.

Right. What are you going to talk about prices now? Oh, man. I asked her to go with me to the shelves, but she refused to go and talked on the radio to ask someone to remove the items. I went to take the picture and showed her on my way out to prove i'm not telling a lie she then spoke less and walked away such a bad experience shopping at this she spoke and that's a good way to put shut the fuck up at

that point she spoke less she shut her mouth and walked away um all right here's two stars this person has a ton of reviews too jesus they have the local guide status there's two stars. This person has a ton of reviews, too. Jesus. They have the local guide status there. Oh, God. Two stars, the hood target. I think we got that by the junkies. Yeah. Police scanner picks up a lot of activity over there. This guy's monitoring the target.

He's in his house going. He's reviewing everything from sitting by a scanner. Honey, switch to channel three. I got to check on target again. Hold on. What are we talking about here? I even witnessed the theft of a motor scooter here at night. Guy punched out the front and hotwired it.

Jesus Christ. Punched out the front? I took the panel off. On a motorcycle? Scooter. Motor scooter, he said. They have a little box on the front. That's the engine. Just knock that off and the hot wire.

Hot wire. More related to the store, the store hours are deceiving because whatever it says, it's actually plus one hour. So if they say 8 o'clock, then plan on 9 o'clock. What? Closing or opening? Opening, I think. This isn't a fucking like some mom and pop, you know, cafe or something. It's a Target.

They usually open on time. Yeah, they got it. Whoa. Corporate wants them open. Only two and not one star because they always have coconut coffee creamer in stock, unlike the Fenway store. Plus, there's parking at your own risk. Okay. Jesus.

Yeah, if the parking means your car's going to get broken into, that's not really a plus, is it? No. No. I don't want to be there. One star. This store is horrible. Besides the workers looking tired, I can constantly hear their managers yelling on their walkies. The three managers I saw walking around the store gossiping, And when I went up to them to ask for help,

they basically dismissed me. It sounds like a former employee, doesn't it? Yeah. It was a, it was an amazing young man and woman that helped me locate my items. I ended up asking them how they feel about working at the store and they all agreed they're miserable.

Yeah. Yeah. It's target. No one goes there and they're like fucking target and they're dancing through the aisles like that's it's target to put on their khakis and red shirt nobody does that they said they were hiring when i needed a job and that's that i was court ordered to have one and here i am here i am according to the team members, the extremely rude managers I ran into were Saul, Liberty, and Shayla. Oh, now you know their names.

Those are their names. Keep an eye out for them for helpful hospitality. I will never come back to the store and hope they don't treat everyone the way they treated me. Okay. I think they probably do. Probably. Let's find out what Fred says with one star. Horrific store for many reasons oh or saw

liberty and what was it mandy shayla shayla yeah are they part of the reason not hooking it up here maybe let's find out the big takeaways since nearly every toiletry item is under lock and key expect for wait to wait for one of their inept staff who clearly hate their job to respond to your request to open the locked cabinets. Yeah, that's how it works. I doubt you'll be greeted by either a hello or a smile. I never have. Because they're worried their car's getting broken into out there. That's why.

Or you may be in luck and not even need a staff member for help since many of the items I used to find here are frequently out of stock. You're in luck. You don't have it anyway. You don't need to ask anybody for shit. Just get the fuck out. You're fine. Do yourself a favor and head to another store. If management reads these reviews, and I hope they do, I don't think Liberty, Saul, and Shay look there, they need to

take a good hard look at how atrocious this store has become. I'll be shopping elsewhere from now on. Okay. Just find the clean Target, man. They exist. There's a good Target. There's one out there.

There absolutely is one out there. This is just, this guy really puts it into some poetic words here. One star. Target South Bay is a harrowing shopping experience that will leave you trembling in fear. This is a movie trailer. Target South Bay is a harrowing shopping experience that will leave you trembling in fear. This Christmas, Target South Bay will leave you shitting in your seats. This Black Friday.

This Christmas. In a Target. your seats this black friday this christmas in a target as you enter the store the suffocating sense of unease settles over you like a thick oily fog not even a smell it's the emotions that you feel right when you come in a thick oily is this a fucking sherlock holmes book what am i reading right now the dim lighting twisted aisles and ominous silence create an atmosphere of dread that seems to permeate every corner of the store what is happening this is amazing this is like a stephen king wrote this but it's the workers who truly inspire terror. Terror? Do they run around the corner with butcher knives?

They all wear hockey masks all the time. It's very unappealing. You hear the sound of a chainsaw on the next aisle. It's just odd all the time. People screaming. They lurk in the shadows. Their movements jerky and unnatural. And their eyes hollow and lifeless this is awesome

i think it is this is the uh second fucking romero movie there where they're in the mall um their empty soulless voices greet you and it's if they're not even human at all but some twisted automaton wow they seem to be programmed to ensnare unsuspecting shoppers and keep them trapped in the labyrinthine depths of the store labyrinthine well written wow one worker in particular stands out from the rest it's not his or hers it's It's eyes burn with a feverish intensity and its voice is filled with manic urgency that sends shivers down your spine. Is this

Shayla? I'm hoping. Liberty? Is that you? Instead of warning you to leave, this worker tries to lure you into signing up for a red card with a slick charm that seems to be part of some sinister agenda. It is.

It's called credit with interest. It's a modern day fucking loan shark is what you found. It's called 14% APR. That's what that is. That is. If you value your sanity and well-being, steer clear of Target South Bay. Its twisted aisles and hollow-eyed workers are not worth any potential discounts or rewards protect yourself from its dark and malevolent influence and avoid this

store at all costs what the fuck is happening here that they should be a screenwriter that's what should happen that i feel like that's the beginning of a target horror movie it's like a the target american horror story that is fucking amazing um wow okay a couple more quick ones here one star the homeless population has taken over the store oh people are nodding off stealing walking around stinking so bad you will and then it's just an emoji of the green sick face oh throw up yeah It's a beautiful store and super convenient for me, but I will drive to another store because I defiantly felt unsafe at that one. Someone who doesn't know how to spell definitely.

Also, the two stupid managers were discussing that I stole an item instead of asking me. I heard them. I was so annoyed, but I didn't say anything i just left i paid for both of my creams what i think i think they were talking about somebody else calm down something okay uh these are great uh one star visited target today husband found a bag of dirty hypodermic needles oh god why God. Why are you looking in there? Yeah. Why are you looking for those?

What are you looking for? Yeah, if you see a bag that's not for sale or doesn't belong to you, don't look at it. Period. Alerted the staff. The female staff member complained about how she didn't need to be called for that and someone like myself could have just picked it up. Are you kidding me? Wow. A child could have harmed themselves.

Yeah. Yeah, I would say. One star. Don't come here. Worst target ever. Drug deals in the parking lot. Well, it's getting better now. I'd say that's an extra star. Tiles are in disarray.

Shelves are empty. Just terrible. Holy fucking shit. And then this is great here. Okay. One star from Eric. i found a dead guy in the bathroom yep that's one star that's one star i don't care how good their selection was if an employee was helpful dead guy in the bathroom ruins my body no one cared not even

the police someone od in the bathroom they just came in and were like yeah we got another one OD'd in here take him out found a dead guy found a dead guy and then finally one star which this really pales in comparison compound compared to found a dead guy I mean the building is ugly and I had horrible service. I wanted popcorn and they refused. Well, at least you didn't have to piss. There was a dead man in there. Wow, no shit. All right.

You don't want that. I like Target's popcorn usually, but lately it is so fucking salty. You don't want that popcorn anyway. Too salty, yeah. Oh, my God, dude. It's bananas. Trying to make it by an icy, that's why. You're probably right.

Trust me, you're going to want an Icy with that. Believe me. You're absolutely going to want a Jerry Icy. So now that we've gone to Christmas Village, we've dealt with the kids at the Enchanted Forest. We're pissed off about that. We went to Target. We sifted through junkies. We found a dead guy.

Lost our car. Feeling a little bit horny, I feel like, right, everybody? At least we can talk. I don't know what it is. All horned up. Let's get personal with our personal item corner of the week here. This is the, oh boy, I can't wait to show you the picture of this. The Foxy, with three X's, Foxy Fox tail glass anal plug.

It's glass. Do you want to see? You ever wanted a tail? Well, now you can have one. It goes in your ass, and then there's a tail attached to it. So if it's in your ass, it looks like you're now a fox with a tail. Ain't that nice? You want to be Sonic's friend for Christmas or for Halloween?

Here it is. $39.99 this item. Tails, is that his name? I think it's tails, yeah, which is an appropriate name to call yourself with one of these. Yeah. $39.99 for this, which seems high. $40 to jam something in your ass? It's a little ass plug with a fucking, I doubt it's a real foxtail hanging off of you.

I want quality. I want mink hanging off of my ass. I want quality. I want mink hanging off of my ass. So this is from, was this Adam and Eve, I think, possibly? Yeah, it's in stock. Five stars. Here we go.

What? Because you, how could, it went in. I mean. Well, sometimes. That's what I mean. Not everything's perfect, Dutch. Maybe it's not an enchanted ass plug. We never know. stars pros this was my first time shoving something up there as a male and this is what

you chose this is the time you chose to do it i really always wanted a tail jam that up my ass will you frank thanks i really wanted to win the costume yeah i wanted it they were like wow that tail looks real that looks so real pull it see if it's real don't pull it don't pull it can you wag it um yeah but kind of it's sort of with a little lube and some trial and error that's not a place to be working on errors i wouldn't say not only did it not only did it work out but it fits comfortably and feels so good too does it yeah girlfriend really loves the way it looks on me too i've always wanted a guy with a little tail i don't know what it is she can't stop laughing this is a man loves it then the cup with the there is cons to this yeah

cons tail could be a little bigger oh i'd like to feel more not as noticeable as i want yeah give me like a big one i can hang out in the back of my jeans. But it did not say it's too small. But it's not to say it's too small. So, I mean, it's not too small, but I could use it a little bigger if you're going to have a tail. Here's five stars from Zachary. It's fun to gallop around the house with it in. That's all.

That's his whole review. He's like, this is a good time. I can feel it wagging back and forth across. He's smacking on each ass cheek. I like it. Gallop around. That means you have no pants on. Both sides have a tail.

Both sides have a tail. Threaten back. There's something dangling. Everything's dangling. Yeah, that's a neat thing. They can meet him in the middle. That's nice. Everything's dangling. Yeah, that's a neat thing. They can meet him in the middle. That's nice. Here's five stars.

Yeah. The poster is a slim, thick original. That's the poster here. That's the person. That's the person. My girl really enjoyed her finish while this toy opened her butt. Yeah. enjoyed her finish while this toy opened her butt yeah welcoming her anal demons to intensify things what her anal demons jimmy my anal demons get flushed what the hell happened what What are her anal demons? Her anal demons. She had Chipotle earlier. She shit all over the bed?

Welcoming her anal demons to intensify things. Apparently, he thinks gremlins live in there. And when stuff feels good, they're in there doing things, and it's making it feel good. Jumping around. Anal demons. Yeah, they're like, come on, let's give her a good one. Let's make her cum real hard, everybody. And they jump up and down.

Come on. On three give her a good one. Let's make her cum real hard, everybody, and they jump up and down. Come on. On three, say anal degeneration. I would love to see this guy draw an anatomy just to see what he thinks is in there. Who do you think is in a vagina? Well, four little men live in there. One has a big broom, and the other guy, like, I'd love to hear what he thinks goes on in there. And that has, because on in there and that has because on this there's a thumbs up or thumbs down things it has one thumb up and no thumbs

somebody likes someone was like yup anal demons for real she's got them too got them too uh next up and by the way the uh title of that one the headline was perfect stretch oh stretch to ride out okay three stars tail broke is the oh no which seems to be the whole point of this thing is to have a tail so now it's just a plug now it's just a plug and the way they say it i'll give you the whole quote it's a great plug the plug's nice it's a great plug but i but I had it in overnight. You slept in this? You slept with this? Why would you sleep with this? You closed your eyes.

I think a butt plug's like contact lenses, right? You have to take them out at night or else you're going to wake up to some burning and scratching and some soreness, right? There might be, at minimum, some itchiness. At least some blurred vision, I think, because having something up your ass all night would probably do that. Wow. Took it out the next morning only to notice that part of the fur came off. I don't think it's meant to be worn overnight. I don't think so either.

Also, when you put it in with the lube, if you sleep with that in, when you take it out, now you're pulling that out dry. That's what I mean. You're going to have to really. Oh, Jesus God.esus god who goes okay let's see brush my teeth i'm gonna read a little bit of this book plug in quick and then it's night night time i've just never heard of that before maybe that's a common thing i've never heard of it play a couple app games on my phone get me good and sleepy do a little crossword here there we go okay play a little sonic what the fuck is happening and then the next line this person really doesn't understand the world i don't know if i can return it or not no i'm gonna go ahead and tell you once again

once you leave that store that is your dildo or butt plug or really anything that goes inside of you you can go ahead and keep at that point butt plug i'm classifying as a dildo or butt plug or really anything that goes inside of you you can go ahead and keep at that point butt plug i'm classifying as a dildo it may not be the same shape it goes in that's a dildo that's your dildo sir i might try but it's a bummer i had this in my ass all night will you take it back what are you talking it's a bummer yes it is it's a butt plug it's exactly what it does it bums you i've only used it about two times since it came in the mail at the end of october by the way this was from a november 5th date so i've only used it a couple times in a week is what he said also only about a couple

yeah and i say he because a woman would know not to sleep in that i feel like a guy is like asleep in this bad boy because we're like we feel like we take it to an extreme you know i sleep in a lot of things that aren't supposed to be slept in yeah based on the fact that i'm a dude i just sleep all the time i just sit too long i'll fall asleep if i put something in my ass i'm wide awake i'm wide awake i am i am alert i'll never be more alert than if something is up my ass i'm so alert at that point like i was just gonna say if i if i sat too long i'd fall no no wide awake i am aware there's something in my ass and i'm right what was that i'm alert if you ever have to do something if you were a pilot and you have to fly a long distance just buy this plug i'm wide awake i'm not falling asleep guys

this will not go on autopilot today s We're flying to Sri Lanka, everybody, nonstop. Let's go. My ass plug is in, and I'm ready to rock and roll. Woo. Seatbelts fastened. It's going to be a lot of turbulence up here. Oh, boy. Let's keep it nice and smooth.

Three stars next up. Yeah. Okay. let's keep it nice and smooth uh three stars next up yeah okay the glass plug is a perfect size and very well very smooth and well weighted oh the tail is soft okay should be cons there's cons to this though the tail needs support i'm putting a wire in there yeah you're the support uh a bendable tail would be an improvement it hangs limp and then a little frowny face yeah i already had one of these they went like a wire in there so they could like yeah it'll stand up that's bad yeah it'll be perky uh four stars

pros my wife loved the smooth glass plug compared to the metal plugs that have sharp imperfections oh god oh christ they don't file or polish those what it's going up your ass you don't want sharp metal in there that's anybody that makes a metal one doesn't fucking charge i don't care charge five dollars more take some extra time it's going in your ass yeah you have some care um cons the faux fur could stand to be fluffier okay so the tail could be stiffer longer and fluffier everybody do we get that so far all right but the plug's great it's wonderful one star disappointing oh disappointing Oh. Disappointing. Did not look nothing like a fox tail. It looked like a dying raccoon's tail. It's a thing that goes up your ass with fur on it.

Are we going for accuracy of wildlife? What are we talking about? I mean, it's exactly like the particular forest critter. What are you talking about? It was flat, not fluffy. Oh, well, yeah, obviously. It looks nothing like the picture except the glass plug, but my whole point in buying this was to have a nice fluffy tail.

Not to look like roadkill for my partner. Obviously. He can't come unless my tail is fluffy. What do you think? He fucks raccoons? He only fucks foxes. Live ones. Live ones.

And by the way, this has 18 thumbs up and one thumbs down. Wow. So people are really in agreement here. Okay. Next up, one star poopy situation oh no oh there's poop everybody here it comes again there's always poop i got some fecal matter on the tail on the tail on the no i'm in the plug on the tail and I can't get it out. Yeah, you can. You put it in the trap.

It's out. It's done now. No amount of Febreze will cover it. No. How much did you shit on it? It's shit embedded in fucking fake fur. How much shit are we talking about? What's the volume of fecal matter here?

I would suggest making the tail for waterproof. Anything else you wanted? Longer, stiffer, fluffier, and waterproof. Anything else we can do for you with this fucking tail? It's a thing up your ass for a tail. It's $30 or $40? $40. $39.99.

These are all the improvements that need to be made. Wow. Sincerely a dissatisfied customer. You shit on it. What do you want? Any product you buy, if you shit on it, don't complain about it afterwards. That you can't get the shit out of it. Because there's really very few products on the market made to take shit onto them.

How many things is a plus to be pooped on? That's about it. Diapers? Yeah, that's the extent of it. That's it. It's all in one aisle, fuckers. It's all you're going to get. Everything else is no shit.

This is where poop goes on these things. The rest of the stores is no poop-free zone. No poop zone. No poop zone. Oh, man. Okay. There's one aisle that's the splash zone everything else is keep it clean keep it clean disappointing one star if you're looking for a beautiful fluffy tail this isn't it oh no i was so sad and disappointed when I opened the box. It was cheap looking. The plug looks fine, but the fur is not fluffy and soft.

I sent it back. Okay. I will stick with my beautiful beginner tail. Oh. This is a step two? Step two, yeah. And finally, last two. This is very easy.

One star, cute but falls out. That's the whole review. That's your ass. You got a latch. He slept in it all night and it was still there. So if it's falling out of you. That's definitely you. That's on you, my friend.

I don't know what you're doing with your ass, but that's a whole separate issue. Do some ass kegels or something. Something. Here we go. Two stars. Tale is shabby is the title. The tail looks like it came from a carnival booth, honestly. I don't think there is one thing sexy about this product. You know what? For once, I agree. I agree. Jimmy, you on board? I'm on on board i don't want to see it either not to mention the plug is pretty large i guess i guess i don't know how to predict the fit i've never bought one before yeah well then you don't know what plug maybe that's what plugs are you certainly need to

buy the little one probably you got one and it looks too big, buy the step lower. Yeah, there's got to be a step lower. I expected something sexy and soft, silky and swishy. Instead, I got a piece of fake stuffed animal fur that looks like a raccoon was washed up in a storm. Every time it's a raccoon. It's got stripes on it, too. It does look a little raccoony, I got to say. The raccoon must be the least fuckable forest creature. Who wants to fuck a raccoon? Obviously, you want to bang a fox.

Jesus Christ. That is a raccoon? That is a raccoon? Too bad I had already thrown the box out before I really looked at it, or I would have tried to send it back. Not a good value. Disappointed. I rarely complain, but yick.

Yick. That's how bad it was. That's how bad it was. Okay, so now that after all that, obviously, but yick. Yick. That's how bad it was. That's how bad it was. Okay, so now that after all that, obviously, we're hungry. I'm starving. What about you, Jimmy? You got an appetite worked up after that? I'm done fucking.

We're all fucked out. So, I mean, we're all fucked out. I don't know that I'll ever fuck again. The kids are cast out from the Santa Village. Let's get something to eat. You know what? Let's not do it local. Let's go on a trip here, and let's go across the pond to Dublin in Ireland and go to Kentucky Fried Chicken.

What do you say, everybody? They got a KFC? Fuck yeah, they do. KFC. This is 62 Oscar Trainer Road, Kilmore, Dublin, Ireland. Okay. KFC. It's got 2.9 stars here this guy wow not great is that high

or low very low for for kfc though i mean it's that high or low it's probably ballpark if we took it to the states it's probably about average uh here's a five star tasty vegan burger why the fuck would you go to kentucky fried chicken which is like we we genetically fucking engineer animals so they can't even walk and then we just take them and throw them in a fryer and give them to you and you're like what do you got that's healthy nothing it's kentucky fried chicken it's delicious and crispy just heat it shut the fuck got anything not made of animal parts here i don't even know if our mashed potatoes are that way. I was going to say, our mashed potatoes are half chicken fat, actually. Staff were accommodating with my special request of extra lettuce and sauce, which in my view makes the burger nicer.

I would really like it if fries and beans were vegan. When I visited at lunchtime, the place was spotless. When I visited in the evening, it was messy with an entire portion of fries on the floor under the table. Well, the place is as clean as the customers leave it, surely. All right. So she's blaming the customers, not the staff. How are French fries not vegan?

Is that because of the fat they're cooked in? It's the oil they're cooked in, yeah. If they fry, it's shared fryers. Got because there's fast food places oh that's like that because yep yeah there's some gluten issues fries in the in the fried chicken yeah so i think and the think burger king doesn't but beans yeah like lard lard also i think they probably have like baked beans because it's kentucky fried chicken so they probably have some kind of bean. And in England, beans come on everything. You get beans and fucking toast. But they're pintos, and they're probably cooked in the lard, right?

I would assume so. It's got to be. Yeah, probably. Or it's got ham in it. Ham or pork fat or some shit. That's what it is. Here we go. Three stars.

Food is always nice, which I've never. You know that's in Ireland becauseireland because i've never heard anyone in america go how'd you have kfc for lunch it was nice no nice it was food real chips and very nice chicken but tables are dirty and my seat had three legs that's not good jesus christ how the fuck do you stay up he's writing this from the hospital after he fell over not well maintained unfortunately uh one star where do i even start oh at the beginning my friend oh my friend the driver was on the live gps speeding like a lunatic well that's good that's what i want for my food driver delivery. Got it delivered? Got it delivered. Yeah. Fly here.

Get here. The bag literally burst open and gravy went all over everything. There's pictures of it. The gravy opened and there's gravy on the outside of his chicken box. Oh, for Christ's sake. God forbid. Mistakes with the order along with it being cold. You ordered it for delivery.

When you order fast food for delivery, you're going, whatever I get, I get. I'm getting 40% of this. I'm not getting what I asked for. Remember the McDonald's? They didn't even put the fucking bun on the right direction. You just go, I'm getting what I get, and whatever comes, I'm going to eat it. It's on me. Because I'm lazy.

Because I'm doing this this way. I got two stone to go get that, so this is my fault now. That's it. You get the wrong order when you're inside and face-to-face with them. What do you expect when it goes through a middleman? You're going to put two people in between you? No! Now you've got a middleman

here. What are you, nuts? Jesus Christ. Phone three times and no answer. Going to request a refund and will never order again. You're not going to get it. You're not going to get it. You're not going to get shit. Jesus Christ.

Here's one star. 25 minutes for a popcorn chicken. Why did you, what? KFC does, a lot of times they'll be like, well, that's going to be a while if you want that. That's still frozen. It's still frozen, yeah. Other people, they're a lot longer. Other people, like growing beards. Picture people growing beards like chained to the wall ordered popcorn chicken back in october

popcorn chicken back in ought four and i'm just hoping to get it weren't you aren't you irish i was when this started with that keep done playing this video of colonel sanders over and over and now i talk like this because i've been trapped here god damn it i ordered popcorn chicken pre to uh pre 9-11 and the whole world's american now because of that day tell the world tell the world liam's still alive and he's okay and i can't wait for my chicken and i ain't allowed to leave though say liam ain't allowed to leave until i get that chicken uh till i get that chicken other there a lot longer staff just floating around avoiding customers orders going missing off the screen also the place was filthy a fucking a bug some sort of

internal that order just disappeared all right now on to the next one actually sorry you don't get yours the computer said no order sit next to me 99 now go sit down next to liam and bolt yourself to the fucking wall and we'll see when it comes that's what happened to liam's and we'll we'll get to him and we'll get to you too let me guess was it popcorn chicken sit tight and he's like tell me news from the outside world would you sit down next to him what's been happening uh so yes a security guard ended up cleaning off the tables. Okay, this is amazing. One star. There is pictures of a toilet bowl here.

Oh, boy. Yeah. What was the first customer in there? One star. The food was nice. Service was good. Nice. Again.

Nice. It was nice. Everybody there. I like how they describe that. And it's true, too. You watch English people and you think, oh, that's very nice. That's always's nice. Everybody there. I like how they describe that. And it's true, too. You watch English people and you're like, oh, that's very nice. That's always a nice. Oh, yeah, nice.

Nice. Very nice. Service was good. Went to use the toilet. It was filthy. Not nice. Would you like to see pictures of this? Oh, I can't wait.

We're back to poop, Jimmy. Oh, God damn it. What is that? Look at the wall. It's smeared on the wall. You could get fingerprints out of that. There's shit everywhere. at least you could get fingerprints out of that find out who did this i went to use the bathroom it was filthy excrement on the walls yeah yeah that's that's a shitty walled place right there no toilet paper one of the doors of a cubicle was missing. That's why he put it on the wall.

Yeah, he's like, smear it, fuck it. By the way, I like how they call a toilet stall a cubicle. That's pretty good. Here, that's where you work. Yeah, that's what we call a workspace. Yeah. Will not be eating there again. You expect being the first customer that this place would be spotless.

They didn't even clean the shit from God knows when. From an employee. Oh, my God. Okay. One star. And again, this is a lot of just KFC. Today I brought family share. I think he means bought.

I bought family share bucket. I asking for 10 pieces, I get eight pieces. I asking for large fries, I get small fries. I asking for small chicken popcorn. I don't get any. You don't get popcorn chicken ever. They just size you down, though. If you order a small, the next size down is none.

They just don't give you any. That's how it works. He wasn't having a Liam. He ordered that small, and he's just sitting there waiting. The computer just dashed it off. Nope, we don't process that. The chicken is undercooked. That's not good.

Yikes. Box damaged and very grisly. Can see red blood inside the chicken. Oof. I tried to call, but nobody answered. Nope. You're never getting them to answer. Never go again on KFC.

Kulak. C-O-O-L-O-C-K. Is that an Irish thing? I don't know what that means. I don't know. Irish people, please inform us here. Is that the Irish gulag? The Irish felt like a gulag.

That's what Liam told me anyway. That does 10 thumbs up also, so that made sense to some people. That has to be Irish of some kind because I don't know. The craziest sentence structure on the planet. yeah some people like fucking like this guy shit yeah we know what you're talking about i get it cool jesus christ uh here's a this is a nice racist one that's good one star the laziest employees ever. Worst drive-thru experience. Food was good most of the time.

Stop hiring only Indians, especially the arrogant and very lazy ones. Jesus Christ. Wow. That's okay. He recommended dishes. I don't think we have this here. Filet tower Burger meal. What is that?

Do we have a Filet Tower Burger here? I don't think so. Is that filet of fish? What's the filet? No, no, there, that's steak. Like, fillet is what they would call it. They get filet steak burger? Filet burger at KFC. Wow.

I didn't even know they had burgers at kfc never mind a fucking filet burger nice that's a nice that sounds nice it's a nice burger uh one star from gabby here perfect combination of filth and disgust 30 minutes late to serve the food chicken raw and hair on the drink that's a perfect hey the trifecta everybody you hit it and they gave the service three out of five stars which to me they're the ones that serve the rock the food is one out of five stars but it didn't the chicken didn't make itself and the hair came from somewhere so and the time too these are all the play problems. Oh, my God. Okay. One star. Here we go.

From Franklin. Worst experience ever. How so? Again, let's see. Liam's like, not so fast, mate. I've been here a minute. Yeah. You want me to get me a razor?

Long bid. Worst experience ever. I had today in Northside KFC. What? I ordered a Family Feast 10-piece deal received with no hot chicken, no plates, no wet tissues, no ice cubes, no cool cups, no forks, and all dining area were not clean. He thought you got ice cubes with it? Ice cubes. Wet.

Do they give you wet naps? I guess. I don't know. I didn't know you got wet naps from KFC. I guess they do give you wet naps there. Hot chicken. Okay. Disgusting toilet.

High risk of infection. That's true. We know that. High risk of infection. I do not recommend to enjoy a happy day or meal here. Awful place. And a picture of his receipt to show you that he's fucking serious. I was here, goddammit.

This is fun. Here we go. Old peanut. Jesus Christ. One star from Carl. Peanut head at the first window of the drive-thru. Peanut. Peanut head.

Yeah. Needs to fix her attitude cord toward customers it's a woman it's a woman peanut head you fucking peanut head woman uh food is cat i think he's saying the chicken is actually cat not chicken yeah food is cat wouldn't give it to my dog well the cat would love the dog would love that. He'd love it. He'd love the cat. That's crazy. Oh my god, that's amazing. Alright, here we go. One star. Ate there 13th of March

2023. No Atkins. No napkins. No ice. Filthy tables. Overflowing bins. Absolutely disgusting toilets. Huge holes in foam covers on some seating. Food was okay, but expensive. They seem short-staffed and overworked. The manager is useless.

The place should have been deep-cleaned and closed until all the issues, including staffing, have been resolved. Shocking place. Will not be back. I pity the staff. I pity the whole world. That's Mr. T. I pity the staff that can't make no chicken. The ice machine in the soft drink machine doesn't work.

That makes sense. That's what I think is what's going on here. Here we go. One star, the most disgusting KFC I've ever been. The place is absolutely filthy. Every table was dirty. Bins overflowing, and my runners were actually sticking to the floor. That means sneakers over there, everybody.

It was that dirty. Okay, and then finally here here we'll do the last one and uh we'll be done here okay uh one star the absolute worst kfc i've ever been to in my life the woman taking orders was not understanding anything we were asking for asked for a chicken roll what the fuck is that i know. A wrap? And they were out of rolls. Ordered something else and they were out of that too. Woman got irritated with us while we were ordering and threw a tantrum behind the glass. Completely unethical.

Unethical? Yeah. Received our food and they didn't give us any condiments or napkins or our crucium we asked for. Crushum? I don't know what the fuck that is. The fries were cold and hard. Chicken was cold. Any condiments or napkins or our or our crucial we asked for crush them. I don't know what the fuck that is. The fries were cold and hard. Chicken was cold. Crush them were half made and not blended.

Do not recommend coming here. Worst in the world. I guess it's some sort of slushy. I don't know. But there you go, everybody. Stay away from the Irish KFC. Watch out for get a better tail if you're gonna shove something up your ass um avoid anything enchanted in the whole state of florida especially in miami it's in boston and fucking boston targets not meant to be frequented

unless you want to die in the bathroom and it's a good place at that point or the parking lot so there you go that's your stupid opinions, everybody. Like we said, make sure to like and follow Facebook page and Instagram and all that kind of stuff. Also, listen to our other two shows, Crime in Sports and Small Town Murder as well

if you like comedy mixed with weird shit. So that said, thank you so much for joining us and we will absolutely be here next Monday. Can't wait. Have a good one.

See you, bye. Follow your stupid opinions on the Wondery app Amazon music or wherever you get your podcasts you can listen to every episode of your stupid opinions ad free by joining Wondery plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey