Your Stupid Opinions - Fighting Children On Roller Skates, No Miracles Church, Something For The Slim

Episode Date: August 19, 2024

This week, we hear all kinds of reviews, including a roller skating rink, that may have gangs of unsupervised 12 year olds, who assault mothers & wield tasers. A church that has upset some people with it's lack of miracles & judgmentalness. A condom that you may end up gifting to one of your "smaller" friends. A liquor store, where you seem to also be able to buy any street drugs you need, right outside!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad free right now join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts Hello everybody and welcome back to your stupid opinions. Hey! Hello there. My name is James Petragallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. Thank you for joining us everybody today on another full week of people's complaints,

grievances and otherwise. Reviews from all over the place and we're really going to go, we're going to run the gamut today. We're gonna do very different places, so it's gonna be a lot of fun going from one to the other. Obviously, follow us on social media and catch up on all the latest stuff here. And if you want to send me,

because a lot of people are saying, I want them to review this, or read the review, not review, these are not our reviews, but read the reviews of that. Send them to me, go ahead. Shoot them over to me on Instagram, I'll fucking, I'll gather them all up and if they're good stuff, we'll use them for sure.

So get right into that. If you like this show, definitely check out our other two shows, Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder, which are exactly what they sound like. Let's get right into this. Let's find some people's complaints. I feel like, you know, let's go somewhere wholesome. You know what I mean?

We do a lot of weird stuff. We go here and there. We're going somewhere wholesome. We're going to South Carolina to Rock Hill, South Carolina, which is in New York County, South Carolina. We're going to, let's do some roller skating. What do you say? Hell yeah.

Yeah, this is as pure as the driven snow. Remember that? No, I never was a roller skater, So now you didn't go. Nah, wasn't my thing. No, I don't know I don't know if there wasn't a real like Nobody ever I never was like getting invited to roller skater roller skate birthday parties or anything when I was a kid So just never really came up There was great skating in in northern Phoenix. but there was also one down by, oh okay, there was one down by Tower Plaza.

I didn't live there, so. I went there, so. It's just popular places to be. I get it, it makes sense. To me, growing up roller skating was something from a previous time. It was another. Yeah, even when I was a kid.

Bygone era. I'm only a couple years younger, but it was the same shit. It was from a different time, but there was still very, very athletic people that could do it and we'd do it together and snap their skates together. Those guys are all 52, remember that? They were all, you were like, some 50-year-old guy would walk in, you're like, look at this old fart,

and the next thing you know, he's doing disco moves and splits and shit, and you're like, what the hell just happened? What are you doing here, man? This is Cates Skating Center, is what it's called. It is on 1530, what is this, Selanese Road in Rock Hill, South Carolina. It's got 3.8 stars on Google.

Oh. What could be wrong with a place, it's just a roller skating rink. How bad could it be? Is there a place to skate around in a circle? That seems like five stars. When you show up, they rent you skates and then you walk in and there's no rink. That's all it is.

That'd be the only way to give it bad reviews, I would think. Yeah, I showed up with my roller skates in hand and there was just alligators everywhere. Everywhere. It's not even Florida. I was very confused. Here's Tammy five stars. Lady at door was abrupt, but other employees were nice. Well, that's good. So Not gonna let that ruin your experience. Just the lady at the one Kurt asshole. That's it My ten-year-old granddaughter was learning to skate and twice when she fell a blonde girl about nine years old

Told her that her mom owned the place and she should get off the floor This is a five-star review You expected we also cute a nine-year-old blonde girl come on She's gonna help the kid up and maybe show her something she knows my my mom owns the place So I know what I'm doing. She said my mom owns the place. You're terrible at this fuck off get off the floor You're a spaz Mom owns the place you're gonna need to leave. I can, get off the floor. You're a spaz. My mom owns the place, you're gonna need to leave. I can tell a spaz when I see one.

I'm here every day, trust me. You're never gonna figure this out. I took my kids skating and they give you a PVC walker on wheels to learn how to skate if you've never done it. It's so fucking funny. I've seen that, yeah. Sarah's one of Sarah's nieces had a birthday party

at a skating place in Phoenix and had those things. So grown people with these fucking, with these skating walkers. Yeah, this is like a whole person a walker with wheels on it. This lady goes on to say, another lady there told me that, told me that her a blonde boy about 10, I don't know know what that means her a blonde boy about 10 and a couple older boys who skated

Well had been rude to her son when he fell so apparently the kids will mock you when you fall That's skating which is to be expected. I would think Next up two stars from Jada really bad Flooring is damaged could be dangerous to smaller children nasty environment gross Which I love it All you need to say was gross and we could have that could have been the whole review would have been fine Roller skating is gross

Now let's get into the meat of this here Angela Angela with a one star. This place is a dump period. She says the period. She wrote the period and then put an ellipses after it. So period dot dot dot, which is hilarious. It's smelly and dirty. I wish I had listened to the reviews. They need to refurbish this place or close it. The floors are horrible. My kid fell. I guess due to the floors or due to the fact that your kid has poor balance. I'm not sure. Or due to the fact that roller skating is fucking hard. It's also hard.

You're on wheels for Christ's sake. The workers at the food court don't even wear gloves while handling food. That's gross. It's also sketchy. We had an incident with a bunch of unaccompanied miners They came to our table and were harassing us Then using racial slurs with other skaters just gangs of small children Harassing families while they eat and then calling them racial slurs. That's awesome

What a fucking this is a crazy place to be were they appropriate ones or were they just like random ones that didn't match up? I have, that's what I mean. Who knows? There's no, there's no details on this. We don't even know if they were all the same race or not. It could have been that we have no idea. Fascinating. Yeah, that's what's crazy about it.

Using racial slurs with other skaters, the manager did speak to them, but when she left, they resumed the harassment. Kids are doing fun. They are letting these kids in without an adult and they are bullying people. I go anywhere but here. There are two other locations. So, and there's pictures of the floor. It does have like chunks and chips taken out of it. What? Doesn't look smooth at all. They need definitely need to redo it. That's all you gotta do is have a smooth surface for kids to skate. No, you have a chunked up surface

and then you just let also gangs of children harass people while they try to eat their fucking french fries. Okay, Ricky One Star, old and filthy, outdated, bugs in bathroom. Customer service is whack. It's whack. Customer service is whack, yo. This place is, it's whack.

And Ricky is as white as can be too, which is so funny. Ricky's like, I heard that word in 1997, and I'm gonna use it now. Yeah, I watched, I'll break into electric boogaloo. I watched a little kid told a politician he was whack. I watched cool as ice and that vanilla ice he called that girl's father whack and I think he was he was very whack the father from family ties certainly whack. Working in a retail environment you should at least and that's in capital letters speak a few words to customers So apparently they refuse to speak to you

It's a silent if it's like a Pictionary deal or they play charades or what but we'll find out Chad gives one star Sure workers bullying and laughing at 11 and nine year old little girls Uncoordinated little bitch! Oh my god. If you don't like it, catch me. That's hilarious. Pranking them for fun as they try to get food, then asking why are they staring at them and threatening them. What the fuck is happening? Yeah, that's not okay. Then proceeded to curse out an adult who confronted them.

Hey, fuck you! This place is mine. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. threatening them. What the fuck is happening? Yeah, that's not okay. Then proceeded to curse out an adult who confronted them. Hey, fuck you. This place is nuts. If you want your fucking chicken fingers, you'll mind your own business, bitch, alright? My mom owns the place. I'm gonna get that group of kids to call you racial slurs that aren't even appropriate

to your race. What do you think of that? How's that go for you? Manager did nothing. Don't go here. It's about as rough and trashy as you can get. Parking lot has a better skating surface also. Jesus. Should be condemned. Owner argues with every terrible review. We'll do the same on this post." And the response from the owner. They baited them very nicely. Here it comes, they will respond and they do. Here we go. Please make sure we get all facts correct, is the owner's response. The employees you are referring to are not even employees.

We don't and won't put up with behavior like that from our employees. Well, it sounds like they were behind the fucking counter. So do you have a policy of allowing non-employees to serve your food to people with no gloves on or whatever? Like what a fucking mess. Okay, Rachel, one star. Very very rude people work here. Two varies.

It's really sad. If you have no patience or tolerance for kids or people, go find a different job. The fuck out of the children's skating industry and go somewhere else. Be like a wedding planner or something because this is bullshit. The whole industry you should steer clear of. Some people can charge non skaters admission and some people don't. There's reviews here and I don't remember if I included this one or not but there's a review of my son's in a wheelchair and has no use of his legs and we had to be still had to pay to come in which is hilarious. He's certainly not a roller skater.

He's got his own wheels. Some people allow outside drinks or some people don't. Okay, it seems like you have to know people here. It's like a nightclub. What's going on here? The floor is always disgusting and that's all caps with three exclamation points, so it must be true. Always.

Always. Be ready to scrub your wheels. I hate when I have to scrub my wheels. What? Oh man, that's the worst. Is it that gross? I guess so. They don't offer any cleaner or help.

The bathrooms are so 3-0s small and no locks on doors. That's nice. You want the kids that are running around pranking people to be able to get right in there when you're shooting fucking pooping. Pranksters. They always got their pants down. I don't want pranksters around. No. Floor by sink caving in. What the fuck is happening in here? The floor is caving in? One LED strip of lights around the rink. That's it. They charge way too much for not investing back into the rink be kind to the community so many reviews complaining about rude workers, maybe do something like training or rehire and

Then there's Kate's response to this obviously and says you need to ask to speak to the manager We don't tolerate rudeness. Also. We are in the process of getting it updated tolerate rudeness, also we are in the process of getting it updated. So look, it's your fault for not talking to the manager and we're fixing it basically. Casey one star, I came to Kate's with two friends. We are all 19 and my friend was told to cover up for wearing a crop tank top. What are you, church? What the fuck are you talking about? You can't be showing your navel around here.

I feel like nipples are covered, you have no recourse in whatever anybody wears places. That's crazy. Wearing a crop tank top that people might complain while I was wearing a crop tank top as well and nothing was said to me. It was rude and uncalled for comment. Basically they said, listen, we don't care about your tits, okay? No one's looking at you.

Your friend though, she's fucking smoking. She's got a cover up. She's gonna be very distracting. You, it's you not so much. We're gonna have people just tugging all over the place in here if you don't just, put a sweater, got a cardigan. Listen, A-cup, You're fine. Move along. I don't care what you're wearing your friend over here, though We're gonna have to put a Christmas sweater on you. Let's go talk 19. They're 19

So yeah, that was rude that I wasn't told to cover up is what the rudeness is I feel like the workers are rude again rude and place is definitely not up to health code standards. Oh boy. And there are too many kids underage without a parent or guardian. I love it when you're, even when you're 19, you're like, these fucking kids everywhere. Four years ago, you were those kids. Now you're like, ah. Children's place.

Yeah. Um, then Kate's responds to this. We have dress code signs everywhere. Dress code? What the fuck are you talking about? Who tells women to put their fucking tits away? That's crazy, that is crazy. What are we doing?

Apart from anything that's baggy and could get tangled in the wheels, you don't have any fucking voice in what I wear. It's a public place, well then don't tell me what to wear. I can wear whatever the fuck I want then. Kids underage gets dropped off. That's what they said, gets dropped off. We can't stop that just like the bowling center

or Stars and Stripes or any business that allows kids in there. Like we can't stop them from being kids here. Yes, but you don't have to tell people what to wear. Right, if you can't, hmm, if you can't stop them from being kids here. Yes, but you don't have to tell people what to wear. Right, if you can't, hmm, if you can't say anyone under 18 has to have a parent with them, I mean Disneyland says that, don't they? I don't know about that, I'm not sure.

But the thing I don't understand here is like, this is, she's not, if it's a crop tank top, this is like an athletic activity that you're gonna sweat while you do. So you might wanna wear clothes that are workout clothes. So that seems like, that's what ladies wear to the gym a lot. So that's cut of- I'm confused.

I'm very confused. Daisy gives one star. Really bad place to go if you have anxiety and if you're underage and want your parents on the phone in an adult conversation, the staff will laugh in your face with no care in the world. What? There's no punctuation here.

Staff will throw things at their customers in an altercation. Manger children, I don't know what that means, I guess manager, manger, manger children, just children from the manger hanging out around Jesus miss phase miss failed danger I guess are also let the managers kids run behind the counter all during session and Also, they have rats that get into their snacks and all they do is throw out bags that have been opened I have no idea what you're talking about. That is I don't know what that means. I have no idea what you're talking about. That is...

The rats throw them out or the... That's what I mean. They throw the rats out or the snacks out? What are they throwing out? When the bags are open? I don't understand it, but that sounded like it was like a breathless... It sounded like somebody that had had a terrible day just unloaded on Google. It sounds like someone with terrible anxieties, right?

To like get it all out at once to you and you were like, whoa, slow down. One sentence at a time. Okay, Angela one star. My daughter enjoy going to Kate's. However, our last visit was unpleasant. They have teenagers working who provide bad customer service to the kids. It's one young worker who told one of the younger kids to get out of her face. Get out of my face.

That's great to tell a child just for asking if she knew when the games were starting. The same young worker told another child to get out of the way before she slapped them when speed skating. When reported, they made excuses for her and stated she works with the youth of the youth group skaters Which needs to be reevaluated? No, don't worry. She works with kids Kate's response here. Kate's got us. Oh, we got a comeback What is this called? Kate's skate? Kate's skating center. Uh-huh. She is not one of our workers. What the fuck is happening here? Why do you have people

that seem to be posing as employees that are telling people what to do and handling food when they aren't employed by you at all? They're threatening people. Does no one work there? What's happening? The young lady was there helping with a fundraiser. We don't stand for our employees to be rude to our customers. Oh my god. Okay. This guy. guy, okay. Uh, fee is the name one star. If I could give zero stars, I would, I would. Here it is. I am an avid skater. Oh, I'm not just a fuck around here. I'm an avid skater. This is not a child because he used the word avid. This is an adult. And I have visited many skating rinks. By far, the worst experience I have had at a skating rink.

Walking in the lady who greeted and swiped our cards was very pleasant. Okay, well we've heard bad things about her, but apparently she's okay now. She likes you. What happened afterwards is what set me over the edge. I think you mean sent, but that's fine. Set me on the edge. That want to be M&M they have working over the edge. I think you mean sent, but that's fine. Set me on the edge.

That want to be M&M they have working behind the counter, giving out the skates was rude. If he wasn't busy laying on the floor with the other guy, laying on the floor with the other guy, what the fuck are you doing laying on the floor? What part makes him M&M? Wow, the other part, he's gonna get to that. The other boy behind the counter was sweet.

He wouldn't have been startled to see two customers at the counter if he wasn't laying down apparently. The young man never greeted us. All he said was, give me your license and your shoes you have on because that's the only way you're gonna get skates. I told him I needed a nine in inline skates and he told me, nah, we don't have that size.

Pick another size. Pick another size. I don't have another size. That's what I got. I only brought these feet. I'm sorry. Hold on, let me go on my bag and see if I have anything else. And he said in a very nasty way too, as if my feet can shrink or grow a size up. I said, aw man, how do y'all not have a size nine? As he threw my flip flops, he said, because we don't have a size 9 and that's what I said. What? That should be followed by bitch. You motherfucker or something.

Shout bitch. That's the M&M part. What are you going to do about it? Oh my god, that is fucking insane. At this point, I'm holding it together very well. The other young man behind the counter told us not to pay it to him at any attention because he's new That's a new guy saying this you're new the new guy said because we don't have them. That's what I said Wow I ended up having to wear a nine on my left foot and a ten on my right foot

You only have one nine Classic! A mix-matched pair. You only have one nine? Oh my god. Is there a one-legged man out there with the other one? Apparently they have one nine. They're like, I don't know, the other one broke. There's like a pile of one pair.

Oh, that's a mess. I hate to play the race card, but I watched other Caucasian customers come in and check out skates with no attitude given. My friend noticed the same change in behavior. Another thing, they had no one on the floor to help the little ones when they fell down, so I took it upon myself to do so. The two guys were too busy playing tag and racing. Very disappointed in my experience. There's no response but I really expected Kate's to reply, they don't work for us. Those guys are not employees. That was Eminem and his hype man.

That was actually Eminem. So I don't know. Okay, Mario one star. This is going a little bit longer, but these are fucking golden and it's just too funny. I had to cut down the list. We could have done a whole show on Cates. One star. This place sucks with about

12 S's real with about five L's bad with a bunch of D's and then four exclamation points. Do not come here all caps. It's terrible. Pass dirty. Pass dirty. Not passed dirty. Passed. Just passed dirty. like pass me that dirty shit you got Yeah, that's the dirty my kids was ready to go soon My kids was ready to go soon as we walked through the door and through is like you threw a door This place should just shut down I would definitely go elsewhere before wasting your money here. The skates are even filthy. Well, that's where people's feet are.

I'd expect that to be the filthiest place in the thing. I'm itching as I type this sitting here. My kids don't even want to continue skating. They're still in the fucking, they're in mid, they didn't leave. She said, I'm itchy and then went and wrote a review. They're ready to go. Three exclamation points. And no, I don't want to speak to no manager because this manager already knows this place

is a flop when he walked through them doors every morning. He knows it's a flop when he walked through them doors every morning. Fuck that shit. I ain't talking to him. Come in holding coffee, looking around going, God, this place sucks. He pulls in place and goes, man, I got to gotta get a better job this place sucks every goddamn day. I'm not talking I am again. I Repeat, please go elsewhere. Oh, yeah, there is a baby in the back

Sitting on the dirty floor where you get skates. So whoever said it wasn't is a lie Okay Somebody said that's not a baby sitting there? What's happening in this place? I see it. It's right there. It's right there. Just filthy.

That's what they say. Unbelievable. Kate's response. What did she say? The baby doesn't work here. The manager, not even a man. That's the first line Okay

Said he know every time he walk in here. I Think they were just saying theater whatever manager Yeah, give a fuck their sex and gender Man and if there is such an issue if there is such an issue, if there is such an issues, then yes, you do address them with a manager so we can approve on our business. Not improve, approve on our business. Approve on our business. And leave that baby alone, he's working his ass off.

Yeah, that kid's our best fucking employee. Are you kidding me? Who do you think sanitizing those nasty skates? Kid sits in a cloud of Lysol all day. Baby wipes just wiping everything down. Francesca one star. Please be careful with bringing your kids to this place. Well that's a shame because it's a kid's skating center.

So that's what they're for. That's kind of the point. We watched a kid get beat down. Jesus. What? And because his family member works here, nothing happened. I think they mean the beater, not the BD's family member. So this is wow.

I went to notify the owner, they did nothing. Then a group of girls were being bullied by the same group of kids. Nothing happened. They're just going around, this is like Gangs of New York. They're just going around skating. They're the guys on roller skates. I told them to call their parents to pick them up the same girls came outside to fight them again And the owners did nothing

Do not bring your kids or family here The police was called and I was advised to never bring my kids to this location due to the lack of safety Inside the facility that statement came from the County Police You know the sheriff's office Kate's response. Yeah Due to the lack of safety inside the facility that statement came from the County Police Kate's response Of course they don't work here false information Yeah, which is a foreigners way of saying fake news. That's the foreigner would be like We do have Rock Hill City there

There was no family member that was that were related and the owners were not there. The manager called the parents to come get the kids that were acting up. The reason they told you not to come back was because of your behavior in the parking lot and they banned you from the property. So they're saying you're the actual problem. You've been trespassed. That's what the fuck is going on here. Alright, here we go.

Michaela, one star. The one worker was very rude to me and my friends as soon as we walked in the door. She called the cops on us for no reason at all and she also yelled at us saying we should say stuff to her face instead of mumbling. What happened? What the fuck? She snatched my shoes out of my hand and I always came to this place. She was very, very mean to us and kept yelling at us. I never had a bad experience until tonight. Kate's response.

The cops was never called. I would have been alerted. Did you talk to the manager? See what the issue was. This This is like did you check the website? Did you check the website? Okay, well maybe one more here Tyler one starts so hard to stop these though absolutely horrible Yeah, kids cussing Tasers being used and flashed What this is a family skate with who the fuck brought a taser to the skating rink what's happening young mom was punched what is going on it's the way hunched tasers and young moms kids was offered drugs and

barked at us for not taking them how dare you I was beat right here with your ecstasy. Take it. I'm trying to be fucking magnanimous here. You're being a twat. They're forcing my eight-year-old to take Molly. Yeah. Wow. From other eight-year-olds. The owner handled it nicely, but the kids didn't. They refused to leave her alone. There needs to be a security guard there. Very ghetto and needs some fixing. Also fights happened and kids laughed about it. Food was horrible by the way. The pizza

was dough with cheese on it, which is the definition of pizza. It's a pizza. That's a pizza you got there. Which is funny. There are so... Nobody said it's a good one, but it's definitely a pizza. No, I have to do this last one because, oh Jesus, how do I not do that one then? Oh fuck. Tierra, one star. My family and I were here Saturday morning and in the concession area appeared to be Appeared to be an eight-year-old working behind the counter in concession. What the fuck is happening here? Are we getting a full picture of this joint

Open-air drug sales tasers, some young mom being punched, people getting cursed at, eight-year-old babies laying on the floor. What's happening? Sheriff's showing up saying, you don't like it, don't come back. Don't come back? That is against labor laws.

It's against a lot of laws. Never mind labor. And is very unsanitary and unprofessional. I think that's the minimum of what you'd call an eight-year-old working the food service. I just thought I'd let the manager or whoever reads these reviews know this is not the first time I've seen her behind the counter. So she works there. And then, okay, finally, we'll do one more and then call it a day because I have to stop

somewhere, or else we can do this forever. Although this is pretty goddamn good. I wanna talk to Kate so bad. I do too. Yasmeen, one star. They were wild animals. That's the first sentence, and animals is all cats. Absolutely.

First, kids was fighting. Okay, well we can't have that. Then, I the kids, I don't know what that means, but then the kids was smoking it out smoking it out To input to die kids are smoking weed I guess in there two employees were in the back kissing and We were waiting for our shoes They allowed Hold on. Hold on. I'm all I'm knuckle deep in this I'm knuckle deep in this chick

I've been trying to finger for a buck in weeks over here. Wait a minute, the fuck outta here. This is a dirty highlights magazine. You have the color. It's awful, it really is. Jesus Christ, yeah, it's the- Kids smoking weed, teenagers fingering each other. Remember what's wrong with this picture in highlights?

That's what this is. An eight-year-old behind the counter handling food and smoking weed, I think is, that's what this is an eight-year-old behind the counter handling food and smoking weed I think is that's one well the teenagers bent over getting fingered from Jesus they allowed kids to jump over the counter it was all bad don't even get me started with the kids with the kids get down in the parking lot yes I got video I don't know what the fuck. Hold on. What did you video tape? Kids quote, get down in the parking lot. Whatever that delete that video. There they are. Need better adults. Employees acting like children and

letting kids roll over each other and then dot dot dot this ain't it which is the best way this ain't it man that's it I fucking love it so much and then I have to can't not use this one okay because Kate's respond so much yeah someone said good lord one star good lord just by reading the comments makes me not want to go there. And whomever is responding to these comments, please stop and go back to school. Your grammar needs help desperately. I've never been here. One star for the reviews from the owner. From the owner. And then Kate's response obviously to this, with terrible grammar by the way,

which is hilarious. Okay. We are sorry to hear that you don't enjoy the reviews that are left by everyone else, but we do believe that you should definitely come by and leave a review in your eyes honestly. No punctuation, no commas, nothing. In your eyes. In your eyes. Honestly.

Honestly. In your eyes in your eyes Honestly, but thank you for opinion and we are happy to answer any questions you have and thank you for taking the time out Of your day to let us know letting us know that our fucking grammar is terrible Wow, holy shit, and I swear to God this whole episode could have been sorry that half the episode is that but I'm not sorry Because it's goddamn hilarious. It could have been the whole episode, honestly. That reminds me of that bouncy house place that was in that mall in Indianapolis. Yes, kids were wandering away. And it's finally closed.

So this is going to be closed too soon, I got a feeling. It doesn't sound safe at all. It sounds like a training ground for, it sounds like a kid's prison is what it sounds like. It's a review of a child's like training prison. You pay $8 to go play to be in prison. I mean, this place is so bad. It's got me seeking like seeking fulfillment of my soul here. We have to go to church after that.

We got to pray that away, man. We have to go. We have to pray it away. There's reviews of to pray that away, man. We have to go. We have to pray it away. There's reviews of church. Oh yeah, there is tons of them. We're going to the Crossroads Church Oakley in Cincinnati, Ohio. And this looks like one of these big old mega church type lot of show and video giant stage. It's a rock concert with a little Jesus.

Yeah, exactly. 3500 Madison Road, Cincinnati, Ohio. And this place does have 929 reviews and 4.7 stars. Pretty good then. Not bad. Here's five stars from Rob. And by the way, we don't give a fuck what religion you are, if you like religion or not.

This is just reviews about a church. So if you don't like it, you can go to that skating rink and have an eight-year-old tell you where you can stick it so enjoy they'll tase you and punch your mom here comes Rob five stars watched as a horseman presented a miracle in under an hour what what the fuck in under an hour what's the flag pan into the fire what the fuck? We just what did he do in under an hour? Airfrag pan into the fire. What the fuck are we talking about? There we go. A horseman presented a miracle in under an hour, which is impressive. Well, they do say 60 minutes or your money back. It's free, right? That's what I heard. But you can't there's no reliable horseman

anymore that actually keep that promise. 60 minutes or we'll pass the hat back. We'll give you your money back, twice your money back. Using trust, love, and consistency to tame a wild horse. Well you know what happens too? That's how you do it. That's how you do it, and I've watched a, not in church, I've just watched cowboy guys in a pen tame a wild horse in about 15 minutes. Oh my god

It's just using when you looking at them turning their heads certain ways making certain Next thing you know, they're fucking walking them around in a circle and then riding them 20 minutes later. You see a man Approach a horse. That's not his it yeah, and it obeys anything. He does I agree. That's a fucking miracle Yeah, but there are people that do it that are not religious. That's the thing, I've just seen a cowboy do it. He had a big lump of chew in his lip. I don't think anybody can do it. I think that probably beats his life.

Oh, yeah. It was an amazing and transformative experience. If you ever got this guy in a ranch, he would just fucking drop to his knees and pray to the skies. I normally attend the Crossroads in Florence, Kentucky, which is great. Being there live was something I won't soon forget.

I brought my son and brother and everyone got something different out of the experience. That's nice, okay. Yeah, because it's unique. Hey, if it's good for you, great. Good for you. Caitlin gives, yeah, it's as personal as you get. Caitlin, four stars.

Overall a great church to attend! I have been attending steadily for the past seven months and don't plan to stop soon. Always a good biblical message inviting atmosphere and a lot of good hearted people. If I had to make one suggestion though, here we go, I really wish they'd stop playing secular music before and after the service. No, takes me out of my Jesus mode. I'm all Jesus and then I hear, you know, fucking Lady Gaga and I'm like, this isn't Jesus anymore. Yeah. Stop playing secular music. This should be a time of preparing our hearts for the message slash fellowship with believers.

Not listening to music. You gotta prime the pump? What? You gotta prime it a bit, and music fucks the whole thing up. It really screws up all the radio waves you can't handle. That's the thing, when you're trying to get ready and communicate, when there's sound

in between those two things, it blocks. Jesus can't get through. It blocks the Lord's word, and that's a problem. It strikes me as odd to be listening to Umbrella by Rihanna as I'm waiting for the service to begin. That is a little weird. She's incredibly religious. That's probably why they play it. Is she and Russell Wilson, boy oh boy, do they Jesus it up? I'm sure they're awfully Jesusy. Here is, is that who he's married? No, that's not her.

Yeah. No, he's married to the other one. Sierra. Sierra, I was gonna say. He's not married to Rihanna. Rihanna rents both- I think Rihanna's the most godless bitch on the planet. Rihanna rents entire floors of hotels

so she can smoke weed openly in them. She's awesome, fuck that. She's like shaking her ass with a blunt in her mouth. She's the shit. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. She doesn't she have a baby with she has a baby with like a super godless. Oh, no, Travis Scott. Oh, okay. I guess. I don't know. I don't know that I want her music in church. What's the difference? Honestly? Yeah, but I don't know. That's I'm not that I don't go to this church, so what the hell do I care? Carrie gives five stars.

Gorgeous structure both inside and out. Didn't catch a service, but did get to mingle with the delightful people that attend the church. Many different backgrounds and engaging conversation. Everyone was so kind and welcoming. I would recommend this church if you're looking. Okay? Only if you're looking though. If you recommend this church if you're looking. Okay? Only if you're looking though. If you're shopping.

If you're church shopping. Again, four stars here. It's not bad. It's four stars. It sounds pretty damn good. As someone who's grown up in a small church and tries to be an active listener, researching and verifying messages that are said, well, don't do that if that's what you're trying to do. That's not church well, don't do that if that's what you're trying to do.

That's not church then. Don't do that. Yeah, you're gonna come up with some dead ends there, I think, to say the least. That's what I like, that's what I'm doing. They have some good messages and do great things in the community. Some of the stuff they do shouldn't be said or done,

such as, quote, breaking horses on stage. That sends the complete opposite message they are trying to convey. Some of the messages don't fully align with the Bible, but out of all the services I've gone to in the past two years, it's been and it's only been a handful I would recommend going, especially if you have nowhere else to go. Does this feel like maybe to you they're selling this, I broke this horse as to show that the Lord spoke to me and made me go yeah I think that's what it feels like this might just be his horse I think he's just got a horse just bring a new horse in every week it's the same horse as last week I remember that one um one star recently tried volunteering and the

communication was not there I drove 30 minutes to volunteer for a quote the big event and as I arrived with no information as to when where and with What I was I just didn't have any info I was told to go to one entrance to park and as I went to that entrance I was told by another staff member. I'm in the wrong spot. Yeah The second guy was very rude and quote I don't know why this is in quotes made a call on my car because I was driving around I guess that's what he said. I guess so he continued to tell me I should leave You should really leave now. Oh, but but the Lord no, you're not parking correctly. The Lord hates a bad Parker fuck off

That's what it is Jesus hates a crooked Parker just hates him can't deal with him. I'm here to volunteer we don't volunteer anything here. She left her house without the who what when and where. She just showed up. She didn't even know where she was going. That's faith right there folks. You want faith? This fucking lady's got it and you're turning her away?'m sorry she just said Jesus take the week you literally take me to where I need to go and I'm in this parking lot so are you telling me you're no you know more than Jesus parking guy

because what do you think drove here he took the week I've been on Instagram the whole trip I swear to God I didn't touch shit and I have a 2004 Honda Accord. It does not self-drive. This ain't a Waymo motherfucker. Jesus has taken my wheel and I am here. He continued to tell me I should leave. This was my first experience volunteering here. This was me stepping out of my comfort zone volunteering and this has swayed me away from ever doing it again.

That's nice. I was giving my time. And this has swayed me away from ever doing it again. That's nice This lady is better fellowship broken right here by a rude parking attendance she didn't even get in Ariel one star and there's a ton of these reviews and they're fucking hilarious I work out at the gym next door and these freaks don't let you go to the gym on Sunday These freaks they swarm like locusts, I like the biblical talk there, and take up literally the entire parking lot even though this place has their own parking lot. Stay on your side and let people actually go to the other businesses in the area. Can't even part the seas to get to them.

Jesus Christ, man. Here is one star. Bro, I've been here and I'm open to anything, but it feels like a legit cult. Bro, listen, I wanted to like it and I wanted to love it, but yo, this shit feels legit. There's like three of them in Arizona that are, dude, they are. Oh, yeah, they're huge. 100% cult.

Oh, yeah, absolutely. You can see their stickers on their windows of their SUVs, and you know exactly, we know the ones. Yep, and everyone in Arizona knows exactly what we're talking about. There's like three of them, and every time I see them, I go, you dummy. And we can say this because we know

none of those people are listening. No way. And if they are see him I go, you dummy. And we can say this because we know none of those people are listening. No way! And if they are, if they are, they fucking shouldn't be. Turn this off. You're not listening to what you're supposed to be doing. This isn't for you. Anyway the church responds. Yeah?

Oh really? Oh yeah. Definitely not a cult. That's exactly what a cult is saying. Definitely not a cult. That's the first line. That's exactly what a cult is saying. Definitely not a cult. Definitely not a rapist is what they just said. Also not a racist. I have a lot of black friends is what this says.

But we do acknowledge that we are not the church for everyone and we're okay with that. That's basically what we say about our shows. So that's fine. If we're not, we're okay with that. Best of luck to you on your search to find your right fit. All right. At least they did it nice here.

Definitely not a cult. Definitely not a cult. Melanie, which is fucking funny because Melanie's picture is her in workout clothes. So I have a feeling she's from the gym. I can tell just from her picture. One star, horrible four exclamation points. These people are rude and nasty and park and crunches parking spaces crunches the gym. It's a crunch fitness. When they are, when they expecting not to, when they expecting not supposed

to and fill the lot on Sundays, even the Crossroads employees will say, our patrons don't do that, but then you walk into an empty crunch when the lot is completely full. And they said that, hey Melanie, response from the church, we've been working directly with the gym and other businesses in the area to find effective ways to handle increased traffic around our buildings on Sundays. Kind of our busy day, I feel like they're saying. Uh, yeah. It's the only one.

This has included us changing our service times recently. So they're basically like, we can't help people where they park. That's not our thing. Here's what you can help. If a business has too many people coming to their place and it's crowding the parking lots of neighboring, you have to get the fuck out and get a place that can accommodate your fucking service. That's the thing. If

you can't do it, get the fuck out. But they're saying this like a ballpark. Like we can't help it if people park in your front yard. It just one day that's our problem that's one day that you shouldn't fucking be here then exactly Kevin one star this first fucking sentence here is hilarious a tad judgmental and money seems to be the overriding theme yes church Kevin that's what churches described church in a sentence a tad judgmental and they really want money. Exactly. Next he's going to say and they talked about God too much.

Like yeah, that's church motherfucker. What a nice dressed people. Yeah. Domination at all cost. Domination. All you have to do is see how they've destroyed the formerly quiet Oakley neighborhood and what lack of respect They have slash had for residents who lived there before then Pretty bad when you can't exit your own driveway because of the crossroads

Crowd won't let you out. Is it a cult? Don't know DUNNO Is it a cult? No, they don't respond to this one. I don't know what it's supposed to be, but it doesn't espouse the views that I think a church should represent. That's why I had to move. You be the judge.

He had to move. This guy didn't go to a different church. He had to leave the neighborhood because he lives there. I think what he's trying to say in so many words is, this ain't it. This ain't it. Oh man. Okay. What he's trying to say in so many words is, this ain't it. This ain't it. This ain't it. Oh man, okay. Nate, one star.

Nate has a lot of reviews too. I went here for about two years but outgrew it. It's definitely a quote, feel good church that stays trendy. The issue is they don't preach about sin, don't do altar calls, and I've never seen or heard about any miracles or anything supernatural happening here. They don't even have fucking miracles and supernatural shit happening before your eyes. What a jip. What a ripoff.

Do we know what an altar call is? I don't know what the fuck that is. The only churches I've been to, and very rarely, were. No, that is. I'm not Googling that. Yeah, the only churches I've been to, and very rarely were Catholic churches, obviously, because I'm Italian, I don't know what the hell they're talking about. I don't know what the fucking altar call is. I don't know what this is.

Heck, when I left, no pastor was even on stage. It was a mass-produced video we sat there watching. Oh, that's the worst. Videos. You gotta be shitting me. Guy fucking, he sent a video cause he's in some fucking tropical joint. Yeah, he's in Thailand,

diddling 10 year olds. Not taxed. And now he's the fuck outta here. This is my favorite mass produced video that we sat there watching. No feeling of the Holy Spirit. Well yeah, it's a video. You're not gonna get much out of it. It's a video of a guy.

Right? I hope... It's a guy on a video. What do you want? What do you want from these people? I hope people who go here come to the realization I did. It's simply motivational speaking. They even have kegs of beer at man camp. I'm... I mean...

That's not bad. That's how you get me to Jesus. No, it's not. I can get a keg and we don't have to talk about Jesus. When we're done here, we can go have as much beer as we want and no one has to talk about Jesus once. A free keg of beer though? I might go try to drain that. This is why I work 80 hours a week so I don't have to fucking drink free beer and hear about Jesus. I'll buy my own beer thank you. This is why you work. What's peculiar and different about that? Question mark. Okay. My current church has grown me into a prayer warrior. Oh good. Look at that. And I've seen miracles happen in my own life, but what about supernatural? Did you see that? This place is dead and void of any-

You don't know! You don't make that fucking claim and move on! You tell me what fucking miracle you son of a bitch! No, that's the thing, you know, that's private at that point. No, that's a personal thing. Ah, you bastard. This place is dead and void of any presence of the Holy Spirit. They even put on the side of the Mason location, we built this place for you quote unquote. Really? Not to honor our Lord? And then the last word, sigh.

Uh-huh. Yeah, well. That's what it is. And that's got, that's got 26 thumbs up by the way too. They love it. Holy fucking shit. And that's got 26 thumbs up, by the way, too. They love it. Holy fucking shit. 26 people love that review. He didn't even tell you what miracles he performed. No, no, this is fucking wild.

Now, OK, I think after that, you know what we need right now? A drink. Yes. Badly. I need booze after that. Free beer is not going to help. Let's not drink with them. If you're sick at church, we'll make you hate it. That's what it sounds like.

That's exactly what it sounds like. We will really pound it into the ground. Let's go to the Pepper Liquor Store. Oh, a whole liquor store. This is in 5440 Risertown Road in Baltimore. This is a Baltimore hood liquor store. 3.8 stars on Google. Okay. First up, from Diamond, 5 stars, they had a

nice selection and good service. I did an emergency Father's Day pull up and they hit the spot with good competitive prices. It's like, oh shit. Let me get my dad fucked up today. I gotta get me, I'm allowed to get fucked up as I want today. That's probably what it was. She won't complain. Dawn five stars. The staff are wonderful, however, they really need to upgrade their security. When you go there, you will be accosted by multiple drug dealers selling anything you want.

No okay. No okay. No okay. Francis gives five stars, large variety of drinks, sketchy neighborhood. Right. Okay, that's the general consensus. Tanya, five stars.

I don't know what the hell this means. They mean cool for, number four, real. They mean cool for real, but get the job done. They mean cool for real, but get the job done. They mean cool for real, but get the job done. Mean cool. Natalie, three stars, prices are pretty good. People hanging out in front and inside are the problem. Okay, yeah. Yeah, can't have that.

The locals. The local, the local trade going on outside. Lashawn gives five stars, three stars. Reasonable prices, but always with hang around outside and inside of store. Now they've leaked inside the store. They've started out outside. That's the worst. I'll go to a liquor store, but oftentimes, man, it's like, fuck, why do they allow these people just to stand around? What is that?

Yeah, if there's large groups of people, it can be discouraging to go in there. It's frightening. It can be frightening, yeah. I mean, a liquor store is known for being robbed. A lot, yeah. I don't like it. No, that's true. And people are drinking outside usually, too.

That's the, you don't know how drunk these people are when you roll up. Sherry, one star. Lots of drug activity inside and out. As soon as you get out of your car, you're approached from guys trying to get you to buy from them. I mean, that's convenient anyway. You can get your liquor and your drugs in one stop. That's pretty cool Police that's very Presumptuous that I pulled up in here. Yeah, I really want to get fucked up

What I just remember a six-pack Jesus Christ Police sit in the parking lot and do absolutely nothing They smoke weed inside of the store and just hang around. Owners don't care either. It's legal there, isn't it? I think so, yeah. And if you have a designation as a smoke shop, because in New York it's legal and you can smoke anywhere,

you can smoke cigarettes. So all these smoke shops that you can smoke and you can smoke weed in there now, at least if they're cool. Anyway, James one star. I thought about going to this establishment, but when I saw people shooting dice out in front of it, I decided not to go into it. How about that?

The old trope worked. That's interesting. Yeah. If that atmosphere is allowed outside, I won't bother to attempt to get inside. Imagine what's on the inside is what they said. Tay gives one star. Every time I go in this establishment, these men are rude! Three exclamation points.

I called today to see if they were open and I was hung up on twice after being yelled at. Have a nice day and goodbye. Well guess what? You didn't need to fucking call back the second time because if someone said have a nice day and hung up on you, they're fucking open! There's someone there! Hello!

They're open! Hang up! Done! Nobody answers if it's closed! Nope! That's the rule! Hello? Oh, you're open!

See you in a sec! Click! That's it! I don't know if someone called before me or something, but that's bad for business Okay, one star dangerous spot people selling all types of narcotics in and out of the store You could get you could go down The the whiskey aisle and get any drug you want that is convenient. I'm telling you Jack and Molly Awesome. I got that's a couple now

Terrence one star hold on to your pocketbook when you go in there. The so-called drug dealers look thirsty as hell. Oh man, that's great. Couple more of these and then we'll get to something crazy here. Benjamin gives two stars. Would have gave them one, but the customer service, great. Not as great, just great. They were so nice as they were robbing me. It was, I mean, I asked for fucking two vials of heroin

and within three minutes I fucking had two vials of heroin. Great prices. It was wonderful. Customer service. With a smile, really. Yeah. Them dudes always offering you nicks and dimes right there in the front. Hell yeah. Them dudes. Them dudes. The police makes this a fucked up place. The police do?

There's no punctuation so I think I fucked that up. I think what they're trying to say is, offering you nicks and dimes right in front of the police makes this a fucked up place. Oh, okay. Not in front and then the police. Okay. They're right there, man. What is this?

This is entrapment shit. That's why punctuation's important. So we know what the fuck you're talking about. It helps. Convey a message, man. Speaking of what you're talking about, this last one is very short and I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. One star LOL.

Okay, I'm going to read exactly what it says. Young Black Side got an attitude like a female towards his own people. Okay. What? Young Black Side got an attitude like a female toward his own people. Last sentence, acting slash looking a Chinese pet. What the fuck are you talking about? What in the holy shit is going on here? I don't know what that means. Next up here, we'll finish this off with the personal item. I'm a weak everybody. Let's do this here Don't worry some people are some people like the sexual ones some people don't like the sexual ones our take on it is

Whatever we think is funny. We're gonna do shit So if you like it good if not, I don't know then don't listen to that eight minutes of the fucking show I don't know what to tell you relax. So we have this week a sexual product, but not a sexual toy here We have the kimono micro thin condom Okay. Okay. I believe this is atrocious is the parent company here, but I'm not sure micro micro thin meaning it's very thin. Oh, so micro walls. Micro walls.

It's also small, though. That's the thing. OK, for a little guy. It says, for that barely there feeling on there. So that's what it does. And these are latex condoms. This is a 24 pack we're talking about here. Oh, a lot of them.

And look at the front of it. It looks like some sort of like Asian So I mean, it's got like a swan. It's red. There's Kimono it feels like these are Japanese condoms Doesn't it Which would explain Which would explain? These slim funny the micro part of it. Yeah, the Magnum is named after a firearm and wrapped in gold. Yeah.

This one's named after an Asian robe and has Asian designs. And wrapped in rice paper. And I'm like, this is weird. Why is this wrapping rice paper? What's happening? Ha! Jesus Christ. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That's what it says micro thin condoms. Sounds so funny. Sounds terrible. We can't help it. That's what they named it. Come here you Asian fuck with your tiny dick. Get your little dick.

Premium lubricated natural latex condoms thinning, thinnest condoms vegan friendly. Hey you're not supposed to eat these I don't think. Let's not eat these. No latex odor. Thin, strong and extra sensitive pack of 24, 4.1 stars out of 882 ratings on

Amazon. 24 pack, $18.95. So that's less than a buck a fuck right there. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, buck a fuck is under that's good. Not bad at all. And there is enhanced sensitivity, experience unparalleled intimacy. Unparalleled intimacy. Unparalleled intimacy?

Wow. The condom makes the sex that much better. Apparently here, boasting an exceptional thinness of.44 millimeters. I don't know if that's good. Anybody get their micrometer out to measure their fucking condoms out? Because I've never done that before.

Yeah, how thick is your jacket? What is this, six seven bullshit? I won't fuck you in this though. The night's over put the wine away. Never mind. Can't do it. It's a warm night Feel every sensation while staying protected ensuring a natural and close connection with your partner made in Japan, okay See everybody I Didn't see that when I originally did this. This is incredible. Japanese engineered kimono ultra thin sensational condoms offer unmatched strength and reliability with science and engineering at its core.

We're Japanese! We know how to do this shit. I'm not buying anything as for my dick as micro Absolutely not they're tested five times for durability we let five Japanese men Different decks go in this Surpassing us standards. Okay. Here we go. Let's get into this five stars here from Alan. Wow. Yeah great first impression We caught these condoms on sale and figured to give them a try. Sure. Why not? We normally use Lilo condoms or Lalo L E L O condoms, which are pretty amazing

I'm happy to say this this is also a great condom They are impressively thin, great fit, and then in parentheses, I'm an average sized penis owner. Owner. I'm a compact car owner is what he does. Average sized penis owner. No off-putting odors or sounds slash textures. Sounds?

Does your condom make noises? Yeah, they do. That are decently lubed as well. Sounds slash textures sounds your condom make noises That are decently lubed as well They also have not seemed to leave an oily residue behind like some lubricated condoms Yeah, I would suggest for these for everyone to give a try Okay five stars never disappoints These are very consistent with regard to lube and quality. If you are on the slimmer side of average,

these give a superb fit, or superior fit, sorry. These are a slim fit? Oh, it's a slim fit, yeah. These are not a boot cut, that's a different type, I think. Oh, Jesus. Slim fit, a lot of them said too, they're not like, there's no like, uh, ball at the end. No bell end.

It's just a slim. Just a straight jacket. It's just, yeah, that's all it is. It's just a cast for your penis. Not constricting, but stay in place. The lube is great. Do not buy the Aqua lube version. They can be a problem unrolling. These with silicone lube unroll smoothly, perfect amount of lube on the inside, good

price point. If I could just select one, it would probably be this. Runner up would be crown skinless, except for the fit. Except for the fit, me, except for fit, what the fuck, except the fit for me is a cut, that's what they're trying to say, except the fit for me is a cut That's what they're trying to say except the fit for me is a cut above the crown so this fits my slimmer dick better Oh boy, I love these but they need lube five stars as they need more lube Not a fan of condoms. Who the fuck is? That's if the lube part I'm talking about condoms part.

Not a fan of condoms. Who the fuck is? Who's like, man, sex feels so much better with condoms on. God damn, these are great. Oh man, we will try the Akamoto 004. That sounds even worse than... What is that? To see how they compare.

My partner can tolerate these micro thins. They feel good to me because they are thin and feel almost natural They fit snugly and have enough length to unroll They have a tiny bit of lube, but you'll need more or get the lubricated version. Have fun Okay, three stars, please don't tell me have fun and have fun Yeah fun Please don't tell me have fun and have fun. Fuck it. Jesus. Yeah, have fun. Varying Experiences is the title here. Uh-huh.

I really enjoy using this type of condom. It feels very natural and I never notice it's there, but my boyfriend finds them uncomfortably tight despite not being much larger than average. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My boyfriend's tight. My boyfriend's dick isn't as small as I thought it was I found out today.

So we've moved away from the kimono brand here. Okay, I was going to say band. I'm like that's not what I'm trying to say here. One star, very thin. Don't buy if you're a thicc. That's what it says. Okay. It looked convenient to buy, but it too thin. Don't buy if you're a thick. That's what it says. Okay. It looked convenient to buy but it too thin. It too thin. It too. This sounds like Charlie Kelly wrote this

from Always Sunny. Legit two strokes in and ripped. Two strokes. That's it. Happened four times. I rather use another brand that feels like a garbage bag or go raw. Yeah. I mean, two pumps and you are going raw, but slow down, Charlie. Don't go so hard. Right into the balls on the first thrust. Calm down. Jesus Christ.

One Star Kimono Micro Thin Condoms Review is the title. Nothing worse than offering a miniature sized condom to a new partner. I have a condom? Oh, thanks a lot. Well, at least I know your last boyfriend and a little dick. Perfect. Looks like I'm going to hurt you. So small I can barely get it out of the package.

Incredibly small. Didn't feel right to either party. Do not recommend. Incredibly small. Do not recommend incredibly small, do not recommend." In case you were wondering. One star, these condoms are weird is the first line. Their measurements aren't much different than anything else I've tried and in some cases larger. These are larger than the other ones you've tried, but for some reason I couldn't even get this one even halfway down my shaft and

Even then it was really uncomfortably tight for reference seven and a half inches length six and a half inches girth You don't need a you don't need a small condom. You need to just say six and a half around Around I guess if you like all that fucking huge Six and a half around but if it's around in a circle because I mean That feels like you got a dollar bill on you hold on you got a dollar bill I cuz a dollar bill is six inches long there's six inches so if you wrap that made a circle That's this guy's dick basically. That seems big man.

That seems a little larger than normal. That seems like a lot of dick. Seven inches long? Seems like you wouldn't buy anything with the word micro or slim in the title. That's all. Oh god no. Jerry One Star, do not recommend this condom. Do not recommend.

This condom tore and left me unprotected. Material is way too thin. Yeah, you didn't feel it at all. One star, feel like an inner tube on penis. What does, what does, what does an inner tube? I guess like a, like a tire. Yeah, inside a tire. How many times you put an inner tube on your penis?

I think it's, I think this is a thick thick one is what it's going, what he's trying to say. 0.44 millimeters. He said, well, if you have issues with pre-ejaculation, perfect condom, because it's so thick. Otherwise, I have a bunch 11 condoms to throw away. You got 11 you can have. Yeah, here you go. May as well cut bicycle inner tube and make fit like a condom.

Trojan bearskin raw far better for feeling. Okay all right I am wow too thick. One star here definitely not a birth control. Well then it's really not doing its job. But also don't just count on this. No. If you don't, a hundred percent don't want a kid, pull out with one of these. You know what I mean? And also if sperm comes out it's not working right. That's how that works. Yeah that's if it holds it all in there it's a hundred percent.

That should work. That should work. Yeah there's no way. I've tried three of them and every single one broke within just a minute or two, even with lots of lube. Slow down, man. Yeah, slow down. Someone's, it sounds like he's big and you're tight and this is not working with these condoms. And dry. And dry.

Dee Dee one star. These are too small. My husband of average size found these very uncomfortable he's like that's what you think of me huh okay thanks a lot thanks a lot he gave the extras to a friend known to have a small penis what the fuck is that these are no good yeah Bill has a small dick right let's give him to bill yeah I heard his dick small we all know the friend of the small penis friend he must have been really grateful hey my normal-sized dick doesn't fit in these tiny micro slim condoms I hear your

tiny dick will work great with these and this lady says he was satisfied so little dick friend who's like they did work for me Followed up on it. Yeah Remember those tiny dick condoms I gave you those. Oh, they fit my tiny dick. Perfect jokes on you. I use them all the time Oh, it's my favorite one. You're great. So I guess if the man is under five inches, they would be a good fit Okay, so I'm gonna look like under five Okay, and then finally here, one star, condom grip strength. Couldn't fit my chubby, I broke the grip. Oh, okay.

Thank you. The grip. Okay. I broke the kung fu on it. I don't know what this whole thing means, but it's great. Man Dems was wildin' inside this rubber. I busted a fat nut and my chubby pierced the condom. Okay, that's the first thing. We got that. I created my brother from this FBG brick shit hurt me deep inside when I seen my brother die.

What? What the fuck are you talking about? I created my brother from this FBG brick. Okay. Shit hurt me deep inside when I seen my brother die. That rhymes. day, shit hurt me deep inside when I seen my brother die. That rhymes. I guess I've never recommended this for anybody because it's not my thing, but have you heard

of the Crossroads Church in Oakley, sir? I feel like you could probably use something to talk about someone. I think maybe Jesus is the only person who can understand what you're talking about probably. That's tongue, sir. You're just speaking in tongues. You're speaking in tongues. He's like, her shit hurt me deep inside when I feel, when I seen my brother die. They're like, he's getting it.

He's got it. I created my brother. He's feeling the spirit of the Lord. That's DJ Jick. There you go, everybody. That is your stupid opinions for this week. Holy shit, man. So get your skates on.

Skate on over to church. Skate right past those guys selling fucking heroin outside the liquor store and put a little condom on your tiny dick, everybody. And have some fun. Thank you so much for joining us. Have fun and this ain't it is what it is. Enjoy everything out there, everybody. And listen to Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder

as well if you like us. Also follow us on social media. Have a good time. And if you have suggestions for shit to review hit me up on Instagram and I will certainly check them out and maybe we'll use them. Thank you so much everybody. Have a good one. See you later.

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