Your Stupid Opinions - Toddler Pogo Stick, Sparking Hot Dogs, The "Bad Mall", Some Extra Legnth

Episode Date: November 27, 2023

This week, we hear all about the seemingly bad idea of giving a toddler a pogo stick. A product that can give you a little extra length, but raises many other problems. What appears to be a stick of meat slurry, with metal shavings inside them. The dark, disturbing corridors of the "bad mall" in town & more!!Join comedians James Pietragallo and Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!Subscribe and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!!!Don't forget to rate & review!!Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie WhismanSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to your stupid opinions ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Something to make you bounce, something to make you longer, and the bad mall in town. This week on Your Stupid Opinions. Hello, everybody, and welcome back. Hello, hey! Welcome back to Your Stupid Opinions. Thank you so much for joining us.

My name's James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. Thank you so much. We have just more people's bad opinions this week, and some of them, just like always, I'm Jimmy Wissman. So check out all the pages. There's groups where people are talking and posting their own reviews and making fun of them. So it's a lot of fun. Get in there and do that. And if you like what we do also, listen to our other two shows, Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder, which you can probably figure out what they are by the title.

It's pretty easy to do. Weird. Weird stuff there. But they are comedy podcasts, by the way. It's entertainment is what it is. Yeah, yeah. We can't do anything too seriously. So here we go, everybody.

Let's get right into this with a fun product, okay? Yeah, what's that? Oh, man. It looks very dangerous, by the way. This is the, it's called the Fly Bar, my first foam pogo jumper for kids. Foam pogo. Foam pogo. How the fuck does that work?

And it calls it a fun and safe pogo stick for toddlers for toddlers bouncing all right here's the picture of it the bottom oh dear god has like a foam bar that you stand on it looks like and bounce on that foam block foam block rather than like the normal pegs that you would stand on but otherwise it looks like a fucking pogo stick that you would certainly fall off of and crack your skull open if you're a child yeah it doesn't have like it looks like the leg the piece that you stand on is the only piece that you bounce off if it doesn't have that like yeah shaft that's fucking dangerous yeah with like the piston and the spring yeah yeah jesus fuck i can't believe that's just as dangerous as lawn darts, right? I mean, it won't stab you, but they are so dangerous.

If you have a pogo stick, you can't injure another child from another yard with it. That's, I think, the main thing. The kid has to be on it, whereas a lawn dart, I mean, someone could be. Those things fly. So this product is $12.99 on Amazon, and it is the number one bestseller in pogo sticks for the entire category. Wow. I don't know how many pogo stick brands are out there, but here we go, right off the bat. Here's a four-star, but they're very happy about it.

That's the thing here. It's four stars. Does your kid have a lot of energy is the title to this? Okay. Bought this on a whim for my four-year-old's birthday and it has not disappointed. Yeah. With the colder months coming up, I wanted something he could use to get out

some of his energy indoors and this is a good option. My two-year-old is not able to do it by herself yet. I would think not. Two-year-old. Yeah. She can barely walk. They're very unsturdy. You can push a two-year-old over with one finger. Just boom, and they'll fall right down.

You go, yeah, look at you. You're not very sturdy, are you? My four-year-old niece was here for Thanksgiving. They're drunk. Oh, God, it's so easy. They're just drunk. Yeah, they walk around. I could throw that girl probably 20 feet.

They're like drunk 80-year-old men, basically. Just like, my hip hurts and I can't walk right. How are you? There's shit in my pants. Yeah, I got shit in my pants. Will you clean it? Same person. Same person.

But we've had friends up to nine and ten play on it. There's a squeak that happens when they bounce on it, which is helpful to know where they are. You just listen to the squeak. Also annoying as fuck. That would drive me bananas. But can get irritating after the 400 squeak. There you go. The handles stretch

so it's fine for short and tall kids. So far it's stood up to rigorous bouncing and we even bought a couple for friends. I'd recommend this for kids probably three and up. Cool option for a birthday gift too and not too expensive. So she

loves it. Can't get enough of it. There you go. Another person here. That's all the positive stuff. We'll give you one more positive and then it gets into the dangerous category. Here is five stars. Again, an active three-year-old's favorite. My kid is absolutely obsessed with this thing.

We did do squeaker removal surgery, highly recommended to all parents out there. Okay. Yeah. Squeaker out. Which was a little bit more difficult than anticipated, but they will come out, have no fear, just keep pulling. All the parts of this toy are soft and padded, so if you have a kid that can really do some bodily harm throwing things around, don't worry, this thing won't hurt.

If your kid's into projectiles, you got a bigger problem if your kid's throwing every object that he has around. Oh, he's going to throw it, but it won't hurt. It won't hurt. Yeah, this is foamy so it's totally fine if he tries to use it like a javelin at you you're totally cool um it looks like it's surrounded by pool noodles is that kind of what you would call it i guess yeah it's like yeah that foamy yoga mat pool noodle texture whatever that bouncy shit is so here we go this

person two stars not as happy not for three or four-year-olds, like it says. That's what I was thinking. The middle is just bungee, so child has to pull and jump at the same time. They have to balance on the block with no support from the middle pole, and it's not good for a three- or four-year-old. Oh, it's like a – it's not even sturdy? No, no. You have you have to like pull it up and the handle pulls up oh my god pogo returning because our three and a half year old granddaughter hated it for a first pogo for child it is not it's a weird sentence i don't know for a first

pogo for child it is not thank you you. Thank you, Claudius. That's wonderful. What the fuck? Do you want the countrymen to lick their ears? What are you doing? Are you going to get your 300 together? What are we doing now? For a first pogo for child, it is not.

Then you all charge. Does that not work? Take from them nothing. What the fuck? Everything, nothing, however it goes. Everything, nothing, and all there is. He's making shit up as he goes. If the middle was a pole like most pogo sticks, then it may be a good toy for kids to learn.

This is not. Unless your child has good balance while pulling and jumping at the same time, all three-year-olds can do that. Dexterity is really the thing with three-year-olds they're great at. The things I would call three-year-olds, one is not nimble. No. They fall down doing everything. You're like, Jesus, look at you. I have two nephews, you know, and they're four and two, and they're a disaster.

They're a disaster. They get in the way all the time last christmas i came in with my brother brother needed a couple folding chairs i came in my somehow my nephew ran right into one like wrestling style bash right on the floor from a fucking metal folding chair i was like what is happening they're spastic slid into third right there's a front door they're spastic these kids you can put them on a... I wouldn't get this kid a pogo stick. He's going to kill himself. Or he's going to make his little brother do it and kill him. I don't know.

Yeah. Heck, most adults can't do those at the same time. That should be a sobriety test. Never mind all this to the nose. Cop just gets a pogo stick out of the trunk and goes, eh, what do you got? Give it a run. Let's see. Two bounces and you can get on your way.

How about that? I'm not asking you to be an expert. Otherwise, get in the back of my car. You're going. Oh, man. However, make a bigger version and sell as a drinking game. It'll probably be a hit. Okay. Yeah.

Crack your skulls open. Drinking game. Drinking game. Now, one star, very disappointed. The package was damaged and the box does not close. There is not a top on it. Just send them an open box. But why is that the review of the product?

Yeah, the shipping's poor. Rip the fucking box apart and get the thing. The gift was for my nephew for the weekend, so unfortunately I will have to wrap a smashed up broken box. Not happy because it looks like an old and used toy. Maybe it's a return. Okay. That's possibly. This is fucking one star.

Here we go. What a really bad joke is the title there. Is this person Canadian? What a joke. Might be Canadian. Nope, from the United States. There we go. All right. I bought this item for my grandson's third birthday. canadian what a joke might be canadian nope from the united states there we go all right i bought

this item for my grandson's third birthday my son and i just got off a video chat laughing so hard after watching my grandson try to use it now those are good those are parents i like they're not concerned they think it's hilarious that he fell down eight times that's fun look at him trying and failing yeah look at him spin him around and then set him down and then just everybody giggles oh my god one hop and he was off the sponge foot pads hopping on the ground dragging the limp foam between his legs it's like two sponges attached to attached by string to some handles and then laughy emojis. So it's just bungee. It's like a bungee cord with pool noodles wrapped around it.

It's like one of those horses on a stick that kids had in the 50s and they just ran around with it and pretended it was a... It's just stupid. Yeah. Let's see. One star. Poop emoji doesn't make the promised fart noise. What? Who's promising that it'll poop emoji one there's one that has a poop emoji that's i guess instead of a squeak it's supposed to fart got it yes so it does not make the promise fart noise the poop emoji one makes no noise

and i went to return it just two days after and it was too late to return it great in every other way but for the poop emoji one there is one thing that mattered make a fart noise or there's no point i need i need it to be the lowest rung of comedy in my house make a fart noise or there's no point that'd be funny for the first three hops, and then you'd be like. All right, I get the joke. Fucking 100 times in a row. Okay, quit farting. You'd lose your mind.

And then a frowny face, by the way, made with a colon and a dash and a parenthesis. I didn't hear farts all day. I wanted to hear farts. Wah. Not fair. Here we go. This product is bad quality. One star.

I imagine it is. Oh, it seems like it. It's made of foam. The box was fine upon delivery, and my two-and-a-half-year-old was excited for this new toy. Two-and-a-half? You're out of your mind. Good God. First of all, this is way beyond her ability for her level for her age. She's

got great gross motor skills, but this is just too advanced. Don't be talking shit about my kid's gross motor skills. They're badass, bro. This is my fault for not following the age recommendation. Okay, then why the hell are you giving it one star? Yeah, what are you doing?

She explains. The item came defective, with with one of the side of the handles not lighting up at all immediately out of the box my husband said it was fine and we shouldn't return it over that he was like it still it's a pogo stick who cares if a handle lights up it doesn't matter does it pogo or not yeah it does it that's the thing i just heard that argument going on and that yeah but it does it's supposed to light up we should get one that lights up but who care we're gonna send going to send it back. They're going to wait four days to get another one. Who gives a shit?

Who gives a shit? Mistake. We should have returned it. I noticed the sound of loose plastic jiggling somewhere, but couldn't find it. Then my daughter was playing with this and the pedometer heart randomly fell off. She hadn't even touched the heart. I was able to put it back on, but

it's fallen off again multiple times. I regret this purchase entirely and honestly wished I had saved my money and not bought this. I would have returned it, but we recycled the original packaging and can't return it. We're responsible people. If it's plastic and you ordered it in the mail to be shipped to you, if it's broken, that's kind of on you, too. That's part of the buying process, the purchase process. It happens to everybody. All right, last one, and then we're going to get into something really dirty.

Okay. Oh, boy. Last one, one star, dangerous, do not buy. What happened? The product is otherwise fine, and my son enjoyed it until he fell face first on the handlebar, which I assume happens a lot. Judging by what the product is, I can see your feet coming off those sponge things, face right into the handles. And you yank it to jump.

Yes, right in your face. When you yank it, it's coming right back, or you go forward. These are children, babies. They're not good at this. What should be only a bruise and user error resulted in seeing a doctor and getting liquid stitches to his face? Oh, he bled. The problem is the Paw Patrol figure on the center of the handle is attached to the handle with a handlebar with a metal C wire. Oh, boy.

When depressed on the ground, as is the case when the child falls, the rigid metal wire protrudes. When my son hit his face on the handle, he received a deep laceration. Jesus Christ. Jesus. Why didn't they use a piece of plastic instead of the wire is beyond me. Accordingly, I would not buy this product. Well, if you go back a few reviews, it's because it breaks off. It breaks off.

That's the problem. So, okay. You've been pogoed, you're bruised, you've put the kids to bed, and now it's time to get sexy. All right? Yeah. You're going to get sexy. You glued the bloody kids back together. The kids all stitched up, and now it's time to get romantic.

And you want to get romantic, but you're not feeling too adequate. That's the problem. So you're going to get yourself a cock extender here. Oh, boy. We're going to get you a you're not feeling too adequate that's the problem so you're gonna get yourself a cock extender here oh yeah we're gonna get you a nice cock extender and uh which kind how does it work this is an adam and it's no this is from yeah adam and eve it's adam's extension is the name of it how does that work you pop it on the end of your cock like a you know like a little helmet. Yeah, like a little hat for it. It doesn't go all the way to the base?

It just stays up top? I think it goes to the... Well, let's find out. Here we go. All right. 1999, this product is. Okay. Four stars out of five for 852 reviews on adamandeve.com, and they've sold over 125,000 of these.

Jesus. So there's 125,000 guys walking around with a bigger dick than they should have. It's 125,000 guys that are very not proud of themselves. Let's see if we can sell it to you. Here it is. All right. This is the ad. This is the description.

Add two full inches to your erection. Okay. Okay. Become bigger than you ever dreamed. Instantly. Adam's extension adds two whole inches to your shaft whenever you want. Oh, lucky it's whenever you want. It doesn't have a mind of its own.

Mounts you in your sleep. Yeah. Wow. Find out what it's like. Find out what it's like to swing a bigger tool. Swing a bigger tool. Sat tool satisfy your lover like never before the this best-selling penis extension opens up all kinds of pleasure possibilities all kinds i don't think for you though because i don't think you can feel anything yeah right you're wearing right you you've got things around it.

You're wearing cock armor. I don't know how you're going to feel about it. You're wearing another dick. Wow. Designed on customer feedback, the sleeve is lined with pleasure nubs inside and out to keep you rock hard and make your lover moan. So there's some ticklers inside. Yeah, there's some stuff in this and nodules it looks like the clear sleeve works perfectly with your skin tone oh so it'll still look like your

dick except it's clear plastic it's not like i didn't notice anything was on there it's invisible it's not invisible it's just clear plastic with nodules and shit on it look i had no idea i almost sucked it is that invisible to you jimmy jesus it looks like robo penis coming at you that's that's terrifying if i saw that thing coming at me sometime i mean i don't want anybody's penis coming at me but if i was wanting a penis coming at me and that was the thing coming at me i'd be like good god what did you lose it in the war what is that the thing's got more bumps on it than a witch's nose oh man yeah Yeah, it's all sorts of things on there. There's more here.

The clear sleeve works perfectly. Plus, it rolls on and off just like a condom. Oh, so it's thin. And then the end is like a thing. Six by 1.5 inches. It's made of jelly. Okay. Why is that word so hilarious?

I don't know, but it is. The last sentence, it says just jelly, period. Made me laugh, too. Like the sandals. Oh, God. All right. Let's find some reviews of this bad boy. Okay.

Some people love it. Let's find out about them. Five stars, this person says. Great when you're one or two inches too short. Okay. Yeah. This product was and continues to be extremely helpful in giving my fiance vaginal orgasms after 14 years of not giving her vaginal orgasms.

We almost got divorced. I was going to say, no, fiance. So that's why they haven't gotten married in 14 years. She's like, I'll marry you when you make me come how's that before that we're not getting married i'm gonna marry some guy that can't make me come in a decade and a half wow this has helped tremendously in her pleasure and helping me feel more confident in pleasuring her this product adds the two inches i was always lacking it feels amazing yeah we gotta take that in because this next sentence is wild he closes he closes hard he closes like a like

an old-timey vegas comedian like he's got it all saved up to the end if he closed like this in the sack maybe she'd come well that's the thing it feels amazing to be able to do what the and then in quotes and all caps big boys are able to do at least vaginally exclamation point it's weird to see the word vaginally with an exclamation point after it for some reason. I would like to see in the written word and all of written English language, how often does an exclamation point follow the word vaginally? I bet not that often, I'm going to say. Just off the top of my head. Right?

All of literature. It's usually a complaint rather than. Yeah. Vaginally. Yeah. It's his fiance going, he can't make me cum vaginally. He's like, I did it. I did it. Vaginally. Vaginally.

Big boys. You're able to do what those big boys are able to do. That's the guy that's watched porn with an open an open mouth going i can't believe it how did how did that bastard get that how does that happen jesus christ that's not fair let's go five stars again here yeah because the people that like it are almost as funny as the people who don't i gotta be honest it's funny so five stars interesting is the title to this. Yeah. Interesting. I've had this for about six weeks now. The first time I used it with my boyfriend, not a good combo with the drinking.

So don't drink and then use a cock extender. You might go too far. Maybe get a little, a little vigorous. I'm only, yeah, you're only so deep. If you've got a decent sized dick anyway, don't use these. You're going to hurt somebody. Well, that's the next review. And it was the first time I had ever done something like this before, so I didn't do so well with the first time. When you're drunk, that's usually when the first time happens for everything.

That's the thing. The description said I could use it on my toys as well, so I figured it was a win-win situation if my boyfriend decided he didn't want to try it i'll just cram it up oh my god i mean hey whatever those are huge in the first place yeah yeah the two i don't know if it's a they have different size toys yeah um i don't know what he's what he's into so um uh yeah the disc we don't know yeah that's the other thing yeah that's true i have no idea. So with him, it wasn't. Well, I'm figuring if it's a boyfriend and you're going to use it and then if he doesn't like it, you're going to put it on your toys. It sounds like it's probably a male male situation. Maybe.

I'm not sure. It sounds to me like it's a gal reviewing it. She bought it for her boyfriend. And if he doesn't want to use it. If he doesn't want to put it on his dick is what you're saying. Yeah. I'm thinking if he doesn't want to use it up his ass. If he doesn't want it in his ass, I'll put it in my ass.

That's what I thought it was. I thought it was a guy going, look, I bought it for his ass. Oh, my gosh. If he doesn't want it in my ass, You know, there's room at the end for me, you know. I got vacancy up there, so I'm happy to put it up my ass. I don't know. He's wanting his. Fucking A.

I'll clean it up and put it in here. Why not? I can accommodate. So with him, it hasn't worked out too well. But you have yet to try it again. Now, with my toy, the first time it was a bit little bit much but after that it was wonderful gave me the best oh i've ever had with a toy granted it's a little flimsy so it can be difficult to get in at first but still once it's in it's like

wow that is the thing about those. If they're too gelatinous, that is a son of a bitch. That would be hard, yeah. Didn't think, and if you're like putting, remember from last week, if you have some of that Lola lube on it, your hands are slippery too. It's slipping out when you're trying to put it in. Sometimes that thing pushes back. It's not great. Didn't think I could handle it.

And yeah, first couple times I actually got it in, it didn't go all the way in. But it does now with my six-inch toy. So now I have a new eight-inch toy that's also awful wide, too. But the greatest part. Awful wide? Awful wide. It's awful wide. She meant that in a good way.

She could have just said wide. It's awful wide. You that in a good way she could have just said why but it's awful wide you heard her accent in that right it's awful wide boy it's good um but that's the greatest part and the bumps and ridges are great with the sensations i get from them all in all i think it's a really good toy to play with. Just need to try it again with my boyfriend if he's willing this time to not be drunk LOL. Sounds like she put it on his drunk penis and he didn't have a heart on it anymore.

Yeah, it probably stopped. Yeah, because it takes the sensation away or it's not enough or whatever. Yeah, something, something. Okay, four stars. This sounds like a five star one that's yeah i don't know what the where the star they're losing a star here because there's a lot of all caps and there's fucking five exclamation points after one of the things uh fun fun fun is the title

four stars for fun fun fun fun fun till her daddy takes the cock extender away that's a working title of that beach boys yeah they didn't they were like brian wilson was like hold on let me rework this okay t-bird seems more fun for everybody he's like no no you haven't tried one of these i'm telling you the big boys you get to find out what they feel like swinging a bigger tool. Put it on your drunk boyfriend. Yeah. Okay. Fun, fun, fun. Having a larger than average penis.

That's how this review starts. Oh, good for you. This is one of those. I just feel like my dick's too big to ride this bike, so I'm complaining about it. Shut up. Having a larger than average penis. I wasn't sure if this was right for me and the wife the wife i love when guys say the wife too that's a very specific guy really love her the wife so much the wife the wife but things have kind of slowed down and was looking for something to help

me reach the spot i have not touched in the wife her she's so useless to him unless he's fucking her. Her uterus is what he's going for. Have not touched the tonsils in a long time. Going well. Wow. This was it, double exclamation point. And judging by her multiple orgasms and the fact that we had to change our sheets after using it, I say all caps, five exclamation points. Go for it.

Get after it. Just remember to go easy at first. Yeah, and make sure you have Tide in the closet. Don't tear it all. Yeah, yeah. Make sure your washing machine is free and empty. Ready to go. One star here.

All right. Not so. These people not so thrilled with ye old cock extender. Not thrilled. How can he be? All right. Looks cool on the shelf, but that's about it. What is it?

An art? Shit. An art piece? We put it on next to like we have some rare first edition books in our living room, things like that. We put the cock extender up there. It's a conversation starter. Set it next to the Fabergé eggs. Yeah, that's where it goes. Valuable, valuable item. Next to the fucking rummels. Wow. Perhaps this works well on a small dildo, but not really possible for a penis. Nearly impossible to get on without lube if you use

lube it slips off during intercourse right i was gonna say why would you put lube between you and this thing yeah that's not gonna that's no good work at all so that's their whole complaint and that has 59 thumbs up and 16 thumbs down so people agree a bit too snug a bit too snug here one star disappointing extension why i was expecting it to be more extendier um i thought it was going to be two inches it was one seven eight this is not not what i was going for yeah this was probably the most disappointing product i've bought from adam and eve neither my wife or i liked it it was hard to get on and didn't work well for us. My wife felt like it hurt her and it provided little pleasure or stimulation for me because the jelly material was too thick. So you were having sex.

Yeah, basically just for the benefit of the cock extender and nothing else. She doesn't like it and he doesn't like it, but the cock extender loves it. It's having a great time. Loves it. Loves it. Okay, one star again unsuccessful is the title couldn't even get it to work no lubrication is the problem or is a problem while soft and lifelike looking the material creates friction which makes penetration painful and then in

parentheses impossible it clings rather than slides oh god that sounds horrifying it's like flypaper jesus girl with those bumps and shit on it's gonna take chunks of you with it it's like a glue trap keep that out of my vagina jesus christ you kidding me um ky seems to absorb into the material and did not cause a slippery surface. It's porous, too. Oh, my God. Just sucks it in. Is this thing alive? It's frightening. It's a starfish.

It feels like it's alive and it's trying to take over. Pretty soon, it's not going to need your penis. It's just going to start fucking your wife. One star, and the title of this is Um, with an ellipses after.

Um, dot, dot dot dot. I am confused as to how many people have actually liked this toy. It is terrible. Three exclamation points. I am a 26 year old female and my husband and I thought we should give this a try for something new. Yeah. Old? 26 is everything's pretty new still, right?

Yeah. How bored are you with sex at 26? Right. This is. Why do you need to be, Jesus. That's, wow, yeah, you should, this should all be still have a good shine on it. This should have the new car smell still at 26. Very few dents at this point.

Yeah, get back to me at, you know, 46 and see how you feel about it. It might be different, but 26, you should be loving it. Oh, girl, you're going to destroy your walls if by 46 you feel about it. It might be different, but 26, you should be loving it. You're going to destroy your walls if by 46 you're this bored. Damn. But it is hard to get on without lubrication and when you do use lube, the toy slides off of him.

For reference, my husband is For reference, my husband is 6 inches long and girthy. Okay. How girthy? He's pretty girthy. Okay. How girthy? He's pretty good. How girthy is he?

I found it to be very uncomfortable. You don't need an extra penis is the thing it sounds like. You've got all the penis. You're satisfied with his penis, it sounds like. He seems happy. I don't know what the problem is. Wow. I found it to be very uncomfortable.

For me, the head is too big oh the toy the toy if you are into being impaled by really firm rubber then maybe this is for you oh dear lord so the other person said it's too soft she's saying it's too too hard um was it cold in the room because that jelly who knows it's too soft, she's saying it's too hard. Was it cold in the room? Because that jelly will... Who knows? It's a very Goldilocks toy. Yeah, that'll probably get stiffer in the cold, I would think. Throw it in the microwave. Yeah, pop it in there for like 10 seconds. You know what I mean? Set it in boiling water for a second.

Yeah, I just saw how to soften butter. Put some boiling water in a glass and put it over it for like five minutes. It'll soften it right up for you. But wow, this is probably the worst toy I've ever used it went in the trash okay in the trash okay a couple more and then uh then it's we'll go to something else but these are too great to pass up these are fantastic okay unsatisfying two stars uh-huh unfortunately neither my nor my husband, I guess me, my nor my husband found this item enjoyable, but it could be

because of how incredibly foreign it feels. Yeah. As an accent. Yeah, it comes in and goes, hey, how are you? Open up those legs I climb inside. Come on. What do you do? Okay. Indistinct accent like that.

Yeah, it's smoking. It could be anywhere. It could be anywhere. I mean, a nondescript accent while it smokes. It's just not from here. Where are you from? It doesn't matter. Far away from here.

I am foreign. I am from not here is where I am from. Somewhere else. Somewhere else. But because of, okay. He said he couldn't feel much of anything despite reviews suggesting otherwise, and I hated how cold it was. See?

There you go. Maybe you need to warm this bitch up. Warm it up. Warm it up. The voided space between him and the extra length was flimsy. So he didn't fill out the cock extender. That's. So he didn't even fill out the cock the

wow all right so no wonder they needed there's a so that space would be mushy so you'd have the head which i assume is strong and then you have his dick which is over and then in the middle there's like a soft part there's a void so he could like flop it around wow uh was flimsy and eh e-h-h um the textures did add some decent feels but i hated that i couldn't feel him and his heat who's ever called it that i i'm i don't know maybe that's how ladies describe it to each other. Is that how you guys get off from the heat? I've never heard that one before. But hey, you know what? Like we've said several times on this show and only our 12th episode, we don't have vaginas, so we're not positive.

I don't know what they do. I don't know what they do. I don't know what they do. I'm very confused. I have heard a lot of women complain about them. I do know that. Yeah, they really seem to be not user-friendly for you to have. God, sounds like they should have come with a manual that got lost.

It's like having a 65 Jaguar. There's always electrical problems, and it's never going to... You know what I mean? There's always the heating doesn't work, and you have to get this fixed. There's a lot of, what does this button do? Yeah, it's leaking. Something that's not labeled. Yeah, it's leaking something yellow.

I don't know what that is. It's very, I feel very bad. Okay. We removed it quickly and returned to natural lovings. Even if it did add desired size. So her review, heat bigger, more important than size. I need his heat even if he's

a tiny, tiny baby dick. He couldn't fill out. It's not the motion of the ocean. It's the temperature of the extension. Of the current. Okay. One temperature of the extension of the extendature um okay one star too big oh it's enormous too big it was way too thick it hurt really bad maybe it'll be worth it after i have a few kids Oh, God. That hurt.

After I have a few kids. Once I, you know, it'll let things kind of fucking loosen up down there a bit. Maybe I'll need this if that doctor's a little lazy with the stitches. Three, four kids, you never know. Who knows if I'll need it or not. And then a couple more here. Two stars, not real good. Too hard to get all the way on, which causes it to collapse and fold up.

I returned it. I returned it. Nope. Nope. That's your dildo. That's what I've said a hundred times. I had a stand-up joke the whole thing. Once you walk out of that store, that's your dildo. Period's what I've said a hundred times. I had a stand-up joke the whole thing. Once you walk out of that store, that's your dildo.

Period. Nobody wants it back. We don't care what happens. That is a buyer beware as is fucking item there. Wow. Pretend you bought a used Oldsmobile at Cactus Jacks or some buy here, pay here. If it's fucked up, that's on you. You either throw it away or fix it.

That's it. Yeah. You got it. Fix it all. As is. Hmm. Okay. Finally, two stars.

Extender is a flop. It's a flop. Yeah. The extender doesn't stay in place. We bought it for the ribbed details. I've never heard it put like that before details but with the thrusting of going in and out you know like fucking does like sex it doesn't really stay in place when my husband by the way exclamation point at the end of every single

sentence in this review um when my husband put it on it was a nice snug fit and when he pulled it out of me it was literally flopped hanging lifeless to one side oh my god it died in there yeah it just died in there uh we had a great laugh we are still putting it to good use as a fingering toy oh my god okay then the words this person uses are vile oh god i can't i can't it's it's almost like i can't shop online anymore after that you never know that's the thing when you got a cock extender like that it's almost one of those items you need to see it and feel it to know if you want it or not you can't really it's like me with jackets i can't buy a jacket online because i don't know if it's going to be short or if it's going to be like what the sizes are.

You got to try it on and go, okay, yeah, with a hoodie on underneath it, that'll work. So let's, you know what, let's go find some stuff of our own here. We're going to go shopping. Let's go to the mall. What do you say, everybody? All right. Let's go to the mall. Let's go try on these extenders.

This is clearly the bad mall in town here. This is, you know, there's the good mall and the bad mall. This is clearly the bad mall in town here. This is, you know, there's the good mall and the bad mall. This is the shit mall. This is called the Washington Square Mall. It is in Indianapolis, Indiana.

East side of Indianapolis, 10202 East Washington Street in Indianapolis. And it's mainly, the main attractions here are a Longhorn Steakhouse in the parking lot. Yeah.

And a Target that's also there. Perfect. I think there might be a Dick's Sporting Goods. But this mall has a 3.2 out of 5 stars on Google. Oh. Not good. And a lot of one-star reviews here. A lot.

This is, you see the malls that are dying and you go, oh, look at that. That's sad. Yeah. And these are people that actually go to the malls that are dying and you go, oh, look at that. That's sad. Yeah. And these are people that actually go to this mall and then are disappointed by it, even though the parking lot's broken up when you pull into it. And you have to, you know, go around broken concrete. Right. I'll bet Paradise Valley Mall had that one. The nicer one in Phoenix had a lot of stars and people got stabbed there.

Oh, all the time. Yeah. Yeah. They were like like it's got a nice bath and body works though it's okay i can't wait to hear about the violence at this place this is oh you'll hear it this is five stars from frederick this mall has come a long way there are so many new stores and the environment feels safe with the awesome security team it used to be worse they're awesome yeah i can't wait for the new bookstore to open up

he loves this mall loves it yeah patricia also five stars i feel like patricia's probably in her late 70s i'm going to assume here walked four laps around the mall yeah that's what's yeah she's one of those yep we walk in the mall every Saturday. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Group of old ladies. We don't buy shit. All of our husbands are dead. Let's go for a walk on Saturdays. That's what that is. Indoors while it's snowing. Let's do that. Yep.

That's it. We walk with other people before the mall opens. Oh, she loves walking this paddy. She's a walker there. And finally, Eric gives it five stars. I went to City Electronics. The service was great, and I purchased two televisions at a fair price. Thank you.

You're welcome. And then this review is five stars. It gives kind of an idea of what it's about. Five stars. I love this mall. It's original. It's its own thing. You know, not like a normal mall with stores that

are all open and you know things like that uh with a food court you know security guards no two arcades a comic book store all kinds of fun things to do both of those things yeah this is an adult man um here's verna verna gives it three stars three stars she doesn't like it well i mean sort of this place used to have this is three stars is generous when you hear the review i don't know what you have to do to verna to give her what the one star like she would i don't even know what would have to happen for her to be give a one star review because wow this place used to have all kinds of major stores and now it has gone down like lafayette square mall uh we was walking through the mall yeah were we and somebody

sprayed pepper spray throughout the mall and had our eyes and throat and nose burning not a good place to go now three stars though we left with our throwing up and having our eyes burning. Three stars. Begging for someone to pour milk on our face. What would be, that's what I mean, what could be one star? Is she sure that she got maced or did she just walk by one of those fucking white barns with all the candles? That might be it. Yeah, that's how I feel in a bath and body works, by the way.

Or does she walk by a Hollister? Yeah. Oh, God. Oh, my God, I've been maced. Oh, Jesus. What is the... Oh, no, never mind. It's just a Hollister. So this one is five stars, and

it's not... I think they hit five by accident and meant to hit one because there's nothing positive about it in the review oh great this place five stars the worst this place makes me depressed lol okay and i don't know how many times depressed and lol are followed by each other also which is funny but that's a bad review for a mall my daughter said everyone looks sad mommy why does everyone look sad here this is the bad mall sweetheart they have to be here they've got an orange julius and some shit pretzels they're sad they're very sad no this is their happy day yeah no air conditioning was on so it was very warm. That'll make you sad. Poor place.

Five stars. Poor place. Yeah. No air conditioning. And several people remarked that they've just given up trying to climate control this mall. Really? The stores all have it on their own, and you sweat your ass off and go into a store like, man, it's warm out there. Oh, my God.

Here's Wendy. Okay. Wendy gives it one star, and she has a lot of reviews here on google um there are and this is all caps always people hanging outside or sleeping out front that's good for them all it's in a tough neighborhood yeah they constantly are asking for things i bet probably like money and stuff. Lady, those are called homeless people. Yeah. They're outdoors now. They need stuff.

Yeah. They're outdoors now, much like Dookie on The Wire. They will walk right up to you or your vehicle. Well, yeah. How else are they going to get your attention? Right. They need your attention. You're not going to come up to them, probably.

Just want to introduce myself. Hi, I'm Wendy. I'm a mall shopper. What are you guys up to? I will be giving you nothing yeah that's the only way they can do it you got to get out there you know what i mean it's called hard sales lady yeah geez uh didn't feel safe at all their prices are high and they change their prices it seems as they see fit what is this like a fucking moroccan bazaar what's

happening here what is going on the rent goes up all the prices go up just change it you have to haggle with them and shit um one star here hello everyone as of as of recent i took a trip to indianapolis to check out some malls that's the weirdest sentence i've ever heard in my life. What? Again. Say again? Has that sentence ever been spoken by a human being in the history of existence? As of recent. As of recent.

I'll take that out of that. I took a trip to Indianapolis to check out some malls. That sounds like a code word to activate a cia assassin because no one would ever say those words by accident i went to indianapolis to program or to check out some malls that's like what are you do you live in rural iowa and you there are no malls and you're trying to figure out what they have you never left rural. Do you want to see what a mall is? To check out some malls. It's like American Dad when they had to activate somebody and they use a phrase no one would

ever use. Boy, that Italian family over there sure is quiet. That was their... Which, of course, made me laugh because they got a point. We were fucking loud. So... Boy, that Italian family barely uses their hands to talk. Yeah. They sure... point we were fucking loud so that italian family barely uses their hands to talk yeah they short

they don't even have to put their hands in their pockets they sure relax over there one of them was the washington square mall as i arrive i noticed driving through the parking lot is like driving on mars what wow you know you're. Oh, like you need a lunar module? Not a lot of gravity, oxygen's thin, you know, that sort of thing. A lot of red dirt. Matt Damon wandering around out here. Weird stuff like that.

Little green guy, so I said he was Marvin. He asked me for some money, though. He was sleeping out in front of the place. I'm not sure what's going on. As I pulled into a parking space and got to the entrance i powered up my uh my pocket camera and began filming however the guard noticed my camera

and didn't like it yeah what are you doing you weirdo not allowed to film them all he told me i couldn't be filming and i need to delete the footage oh what just happened you don't want seen this isn't the vatican this is a fucking you're talking about i said no but i will gladly leave on my way out he was following and harassing me he was telling me i need to delete the footage as i again said no he then began swearing and saying how they're tired of people coming to this mall and documenting it it's a sad mall there's a ton of youtube channels that have like defunct things and sad malls and apparently all of them all come to this mall because it's a famously sad mall so they're tired of it they're tired of people stop it jesus every day there's people walking

around oh man this is so sad isn't it look? Look at this guy. Delete that! Wow. No! This has to be one of the worst incidents I've had to deal with while doing YouTube. Other than mall at the Source in New York, I will not be returning to this mall again. I wouldn't recommend visiting this mall either. Everyone be careful out there. It's very sad. Very sad.

Oh, Jesus. Okay, here's Franco, one star. It's a semi-abandoned mall where you're nervous to leave your car in the parking lot. You want to walk away from your car here? This is like the dying days of Metro Center is what this sounds like exactly in Phoenix. Every town in America goes, oh, that's that mall. Yeah, I know that mall. Every city, every town. Isn't it bizarre that's that mall yeah i know that mall every city isn't it bizarre

that that that that form of commerce is literally dying it's dying at a certain and then a certain at a rate it's that's so fast but there's like a couple of things that are hanging on but they're not well yeah and they're not but they're not enough to support a whole that much fucking landscape that much air conditioning yeah yeah. Yeah. That electric bill. Fuck, man. The only thing going for this area is Target. I have to admit, though, I found it extremely interesting walking around that mall. It truly feels like a ghost mall, and I'm guessing to save money, they don't ever turn all the lights on, giving it an even creepier feeling.

It's like dark and hot in there. Yeah. all the lights on, giving it an even creepier feeling. It's like dark and hot in there. I never see people actually shopping there, and I'm assuming the shops that are open are more likely fronts for illegal money laundering. Possibly.

Possibly. Okay, Kyle gives it one star here. This one here is the best, because I love when people have another idea, like that person that wanted to turn yeah perhaps you should bring in rei yeah i was like what turn it into a water park slash whatever the aquatic center um this small was the greatest in the 80s well that was 40 years ago so it sure was a lot of things were great 40 years before they weren't you know what i'm saying like think about that yeah in the

80s uh yeah no not much great 40 years michael jordan could dunk from the foul line in the 80s too i'd ask him to do that now he probably would have a hard time but he can't but over the years ownership failed to believe in the community and supported its surrounding areas more now uh nowadays i guess nowadays the business and choices we make with our dollars is forced elsewhere. The Eastside property is a gold mine, not only for Eastside community, but for the state. And I can't believe nobody can see that. Only me. I'm the only guy with the vision.

If I had the money, I love when people put that in review. If I had the money, you can believe i would make a difference what does that mean you'd buy it and turn it into what and then then you'd give money to everything that's not how life works you don't have the money that's because you're bad at making money because you think a dying mall is a great investment that's why you don't have money and then and then you put stores in there and then as as the owner, you take money for rent, and then you're going to give all your money away? How are you going to live and support your future, man? See, we never had money because we're lazy.

He never had money because he's stupid. There's a difference. Big difference. Yes. Let's see. I would make a difference and bring back life, life jobs and perhaps rebuild a spirit that needs healing. Reach out. Halloween store?

Yeah, a spirit Halloween store here. Oh, my God. One star. The parking lot looked like it had been shelled. The corridors seemed to only be lit by the storefronts. I do appreciate the no weapons and hoodies sign on the door. Oh, my fucking God here. I don't appreciate that.

If that sign has to be there, that's disturbing. That's very disturbing here. Here's one star from Sarah. What even is this place? Certainly not a mall. All the stores are closed down except for a few small vendors in the hallways. This kiosk. What even is this place certainly not a mall all the stores are closed down except for a few small vendors in the hallways this kiosk what even is this just phone cases and shit and eyebrow threading that's all it goes on there and shit toys that if they were any good they'd be in this

toy store yeah exactly my children were legit scared when we were walking around because of how eerily quiet and dark and dirty it was everything is so old and rusty and dusty even the play area was all blocked off with chairs so we couldn't go in there yeah there's probably a biohazard in there you look a little closer there's an outline of a small child it's still a crime scene and the security guard walking around told me videos are not allowed. Why? Since when? He just tells everybody. Trying to hide something?

Just in case you're about to record. Yeah, that's amazing. Holy shit. Oh, my God. That's fucking amazing. Don't record how sad this is. God damn it. Jesus Christ.

Okay. One more and then one sentence after that. One star. Don't go there. Yeah. No. No air conditioning unless you go inside a store and most of those

don't have or turn the AC on. It's not a mall. Malls have climate control. If you say, what's a mall? You'd go, a climate controlled

indoor thing with a lot of shopping. That's exactly how you describe it as if someone was building a mall. Well, what is that? Climate controlled indoor facility with adjoining shops and storefronts. There you go. You just go from storefront to storefront. it as like a you know if someone was building a mall well what is that climate controlled

indoor facility with adjoining shops and storefronts there you go go from storefront that's how you do it but they're not making that uh more of a flea market than a mall very few customers inside not what you expect when you say let's go to the mall tear it down and hopefully somebody rebuild one i don't think so um no uh then finally one star short and sweet from heather just demolish it already just let it out of its misery get rid of this piece of shit it's dead okay so let's see here let's regroup yeah we've tried we tried to have some fun pogoing. We ended up with stitches. We can't do that.

So then we said, let's have a good night with this cock extender. It doesn't work. It's flopping all around. It's stuck. It's still stuck in me. It's stuck. It's still stuck in you.

That's the problem. Like Velcro. Not on you, in you. It gets stuck. It's too, the lube makes it fall off. That's not working. So we tried to

clear our minds by going to the mall couldn't even find anything to buy you know what i'm but i got an airbrush hat with your name on it that's they had those in a fucking scripty thing with like pink shadows behind it you know those are so i'm getting hungry we've got all we've done all this starving all this sex and pogoing and mall walking i'm very hungry let's get ourselves some hot dogs what do you say everybody oh what is it nice and easy they're nice and easy we're not going anywhere we're buying them bring them home with us let's do it at home we're buying a package of bar s classic franks which of Bar-S Classic Franks, which Bar-S, I'll say it right now, is the worst. They make the worst food products

on the shelves. It makes Carl's Budding look like a fucking boar's head. Plural Carl. Yeah, like Carl's Jr. It was Carl's Budding. I don't understand what the fuck that is.

Wasn't it just Carl Budding? I thought it was Carl's Budding. I think it's Carl Budding's. Oh, all right. Carl Budding's? All right, whatever the fuck that is. Wasn't it just Carl Budding? I thought it was Carl's Budding. I think it's Carl Budding's. Oh, all right. Carl Budding's? All right. Whatever the fuck it is. It's bad, and this is worse.

Okay. These are, you hear all beef franks all the time. That means they're good. These are classic franks on the package, made with chicken and pork added, smoke flavoring added as well. We ran out of all the other stuff so we put some other shit we put some other shit in there 12 ounces eight hot dogs is a dollar 12 okay jesus a dollar a dollar 12 a dollar 12 for half a pound of meat or 12 ounces three quarters of a fucking pound of meat three quarters of a pound of meat for fucking a dollar twelve what do you think is in

there chinese newspapers like honestly are you kidding me the fuck out of here what how many how many are there 12 eight hot dogs 12 ounces jesus christ that's like a nickel a piece they're the worst i I've had them. They're gritty. It feels like there's chunks of, you're like, what is that? That makes sense because they're bacons like that, too. They're bacons. It's terrible.

It's terrible. It's bad shit. Bad quality. Remember if you get a piece of cheap paper when you were a kid and there'd be like a little chunk of wood in it? Remember that? Yeah, you could see it. That's what this is.

Like, is there pulp in here? There's little pieces of wood in it. Holy shit. Here we go. Five stars. Somebody likes this poor shit. Wow. By the way, they only have 3.3 stars here on, I think it's Walmart's site.

So nobody, they're not great. Quality, the one person says. Quality. Always the best hot dog to fit your hot dog needs is it no it's the worst hot dog to fit yeah have you had nathan's man or anything else have a hebrew jesus ballparks blow these out of the water yeah you know what i mean oscar myers are much better they're the worst hot dog you can buy. Whatever your store brand is, buy that. It'll be a better quality.

I guarantee you because you can go back there and complain about it. You can't go to Bar S. It's in Phoenix. You can go to Bar S. Is it really? Oh, yeah. It's the Bar S headquarters. It's the hot dog headquarters there.

Good God. There are tons of reviews that say this, basically. These are most of the five-star reviews. Five stars, great treats. I buy these for my senior dog. These are dog hot dogs. You buy these to put pills in.

He has medication to take twice daily, sometimes twice a day. This is the easiest way to give him his meds. He loves hot dogs. And they're mushy and he has no teeth because he's a senior dog. He's a senior dog and you can just put it down. He can chew it with his tongue.

It's either dogs or small children that don't care. Yeah, I put it on their mac and cheese. Five stars. I personally do not like hot dogs, but my grandsons love them. This is the only brand that they will eat what good god are you wow what have you done to those children they like them hot or cold oh that's like a fear factor fucking thing like i think that was one of the categories you're gonna eat a cold bar s hot dog can you get through the whole thing if so you get ten thousand dollars

i feel like that was what happened because that's disgusting i think i i vividly remember it they said uh you have to eat seven of these hissing cockroaches yeah or two hot dogs and they said cold i'll take 14 of those cockroaches before i touch those hot dogs cold bar s um they like them hot or cold i have three of them i believe they mean grandson have three of them. I believe they mean grandsons. That eat them almost every day. Don't feed them to the... One hot dog is 20% of your daily sodium, by the way. One hot dog.

Every day. Every day feeding the kids this. It's their go-to when they're hungry between meals. Don't stop doing that. That's a snack. Oh, my God. One star here. Okay.

Pick the best available quality package. Dislike the package of Franks I received. It had visible substance on them. On the package or on the hot dog? I don't know, but either way, I wouldn't. I'd throw that right in the garbage. I want that. Yeah.

Here's one star. The title is they were blood red. Oh! That's not how hot dogs go. No. There should be a nice brown color. Somebody got a little stir crazy with the red 40. These aren't as advertised.

They know the chemical that did it. Is it in? I'm going to go look at it because I have the ingredients because there's a picture of the package on there. So let's see if there's a red 40. There is no red 40. Okay. Here's the ingredients, by the way. Ingredients.

Mechanically separated chicken. That sounds lovely. What does that mean? No human will touch it. It's too shitty. We have machines tear it apart, and these are greased and oiled machines that are touching this. Mechanically separated chicken. That's the first ingredient in these hot dogs.

Mechanically separated chicken and probably joint grease. Yeah, bones, little bones. And little bones, that's what those hard parts are. Water, pork, dextrose, modified cornstarch, salt, contains 2% or less of the following. 2% or less of the following two percent or less of the following less beef less than two percent beef beef franks yes less than two percent beef corn syrup flavorings sodium phosphates potassium lactate potassium acetate sodium diacetate sodium i don't even know what the fuck that can't even pronounce the rest of these but they're all terrible they're all chemicals smoke flavoring they are so processed this is a terrible

fucking and they taste like shit sometimes i mean if it's processed it's good whatever but this tastes like shit it's not like velveta or something where you're like yeah but it's good it's terrible this is giving me cancer and it's gross i I thought it was the red plastic, but that's the actual color of the cancer they are feeding people. Wow. Seems almost libelous. Jesus Christ. Bright red. Blood red.

Blood red. One star. These Bar S hot dogs have a weird taste to them, and my grandsons did not eat them at age 8 and 10. They normally love hot dogs these are weird grandma um okay here's one star can i get a refund i'm looking through orders i noticed i didn't get this and i did have a stroke that's why my memory isn't great what can i do since i didn't get this maybe you did get them and you ate them and that's why you had a stroke because all that sodium perhaps that's what caused it you stroked out now with a hot dog in your hand when the paramedics took you away

i don't know maybe you put maybe you put red 40 on it instead of ketchup yeah maybe jesus one star they shortened the hot dogs well that seems almost merciful at this point. Yeah. Good. To give you less. Is it girthier, though? That's the thing. Can you put a cock extender on it, do you think? You think it would stay on it? Fill it out?

You think it would stay on it or not? My kids won't eat. They won't eat them because they're short now? Yeah, these kids are. I'd go, listen, asshole. I like to deep throat this hot dog and it doesn't work. What are you, Dustin Hoffman in Rain Man? Fucking, there, now there's eight fish sticks.

Okay, they shorten the hot dogs and now they look very small in the buns. Very short. My kids won't eat them because the kids have to tear two inches off of their buns in order to make it fit the hot dogs. Yeah, put the cog extender on it and it'll fit perfect. It's two extra inches. So floppy buns and floppy extenders this week on your stupid opinions. Okay, one star. You were out of Bar S brand bologna.

How can you be without bologna? What? That's nothing to do with hot dogs. They're mad at Bar S in general and this was the first product and you didn't have bar s brand which i can't imagine how god awful that has to be bottom rung meats at bar s what is in it though if separated chicken why this wow um because bologna's not even claiming to be decent they're're like, here, we mashed a bunch of shit in a meat particle board. Eat it.

Shot a tube out. Wow. Okay. One star. Not good. Not good. I've eaten most name brand hot dogs and all were good, but these had the nastiest flavor in them. Not sure if the flavor was supposed to be there or if it was some accident slash problem.

Somebody dropped a bottle of bleach in the mix well i think it's that smoke flavor probably that they don't like um never again for these uh these are really disturbing one star sparky is the title of it what i put a couple of these hot dogs in the microwave and they started sparking like they had little pieces of ground metal in them. Sparking. That means there's metal in them. Meat won't spark otherwise in a hot microwave. It doesn't. No.

Never seen that happen before. There's Brillo pad in these. Oh my god. That's not in the, probably from the separated chicken machine, whatever the fuck. Right. You got some fucking ball bearings in it. Yeah, a couple of those. Watch out. I threw them all out.

I will never buy them again. Oof. One star. I bought these Franks last week, and there was metal inside them. There you go. It caught my microwave on fire. How long did you walk away from your microwave? How long do you cook a hot dog for in the microwave?

Like 40 seconds or something? It caught your microwave on fire? Flames? How much metal was in there? An all-metal frank, everyone. The whole thing. It's all metal. It's an alloy frank.

It's very metal. Did you put your dildo in there? Maybe that's what happened. Maybe that's what happened. BarS offered me a refund for the Franks, but nothing for my microwave. Oh. Please be careful. Yeah, they gave me new Franks.

Oh, my God. Here's one star. Bit of chunks in it, question mark? What kind? Chewing it. I had weird bites that were too crunchy. Just not a fan. Yeah, those are the weird, like we talked about.

Those used to be your teeth. Yeah, those are pieces of chicken bone. Those were ball bearings and your teeth collapsed. I didn't see that in the ingredients. Sweepings from a metal shop, I didn't see. But apparently that's part of it. Not sure. Metal shop floor sweepings, I didn't see.

Right? Did you see that? Did I miss that one? Drill press shavings. Is that my bad? I might have missed. I'm not a great, you know. But if you buy a package of hot dog

for $1.10, you get whatever's in there. If you look and you go, this is 12 ounces of meat, and it's $1.12, what meat do you think that is? There's very little meat in that, my friend. Go look in the meat section. A pound, three-quarters of a pound of any meat costs more than $1.12. It just does. It's just, sorry.

That's 30% aluminum shaving. That is. For sure. Probably for weight, because they're a little weightier. The metal is probably what it is. Just to get to 12 ounces. Fill out that 12. We shortened them.

Now let's stack them with weight. Make them more dense. If you buy Bar-Ass anything, you better fucking expect whatever you get. Yeah, be happy with it. It's terrible. Go, this is going to be terrible. Who wants some? Yeah, this is where I am.

I'm eating this. You grill them until they're burned and hope there's no metal in them. That's it. Hope it doesn't crush your teeth. One star. So gross. Yeah. These things were horrible.

Like meat, only different. Well, that's not good because they're supposed to be meat. But not meat. Oh, my God. Not even fit for dogs. Never mind human consumption. They were mushy and a weird orange color. So they're running out of the Red 40.

Oh, God. Now it's orange dye 29. That's it. Okay. I can't take any more Bar-S. I'm never going to eat again. We got to eat dinner after this. I hope whoever feeds those to their dogs stops immediately.

Stop. Yeah, they're terrible for all. And they're, fuck their dog, the grandkids, too. There's metal in those. There's metal. What are we doing? Holy shit. That's Bar-S hot dogs.

Unbelievable. So there you go, everybody. You know where to shop. You know how to extend your cock. You know a great toy to injure your grandchildren and laugh at them when they can't do it. And then after the day. You know the bottom rung hot dogs. Yep.

Kick back and have a nice hot dog. Just don't cook it in the microwave. There you go, everybody. Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. We have pages all over the place. Listen to our other shows, Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder. Don't forget about those. And keep hanging out with us every Monday morning.

Thank you, folks, so much. Jesus, be careful out there and send us your reviews. Thank you, everybody. Bye. Follow Your Stupid Opinions on the Wondery app, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to every episode of Your Stupid Opinions ad-free by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.