Your Stupid Opinions - Water Wars, Alleged Chicken Problems, Outback In The City
Episode Date: July 27, 2026More of the funniest reviews on the internet! We read reviews for a water park that seems to be mainly famous for being one of the worst rated, in the United States. A fried chicken restaurant, where ...the reviews seem to be a little more personal, and the chicken is either perfect, or terrible. An Australian motel, where bloody items are found, and the mice keep away the kangaroos & much more!! Join comedians James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section! Subscribe, and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!! Dont forget to rate & review!! Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for merch & more Check out James & Jimmie's other podcasts, Small Town Murder & Crime In Sports on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts!!
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Hello, everybody, and welcome back to your stupid opinions.
Hey!
Thank you so much for joining us today.
for more people's bullshit.
That's right.
People are going to complain about places
we don't want to go
and the people who are complaining
we or you,
none of us want to meet these people either.
That's what's so much fun.
My name is James Petro Gallo.
I'm here with my co-host.
I'm Jimmy Wiseman.
And it is time to get down to business.
Before we do, though,
for sure, head over to shut up
and give me murder.com
and check out everything there,
including our other shows
and merchandise for your stupid opinions
and everything like that.
Check out crime and sports,
our other podcast.
And Small Town Murder are also our other podcast, which you can also see on Netflix if you want to check that out.
So do that.
And then bring yourself over to Hurricane Harbor because that's where we're going.
We're going back to Hurricane Harbor out there in Glendale in Arizona.
It's Phoenix, West Phoenix.
And used to be.
It's out by the prison.
If you're watching Love After Lockup, it's where that girl picked up that guy.
Yeah, it's exactly out there where it is.
Yeah, if they could have gone right from there to the water park,
and it would have been a lot of fun for everybody.
So that, by the way, used to be wet and wild, correct?
Yes.
Was it not Waterworld?
I was going to say, it was wet and wild, but before that, it was Waterworld.
Wasn't it?
Wasn't it?
Whoa, Waterworld.
Waterworld.
Remember the fucking ads for it?
Was that Waterworld?
I think, I mean, Waterworld was over there,
but I think you used to be able to see Waterworld from I-17, couldn't you?
Damn it, I don't remember.
I don't know all I remember is when I first moved my more my mother moved out there the first summer I went to see her in 91 was like I remember hearing the water world commercials and all these water park commercials I was like wow there's so many this is amazing in New York all you heard about was great adventure and action park and you know that's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's on the way way down slide but I think people fell off of it and I think that's why water world closed drunkenly jumped off of it try to fuck on the way down
I was 12 or 13 when I went there the first time, and I went down that slide exactly one time, and you come off the slide because it's fucking straight down.
Yeah, yeah.
So they can say it's at a whatever angle, but there's a moment that you crest it, and then it's straight the fuck down.
So you come off the slide.
Yeah.
Then the slide angles back, and it catches you, and then you get into the catch pool, and your bunk, your trunks go straight the fuck up your act.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, that's one of those.
You got to make sure to have your asshole closed tightly or else you're in a lot of trouble.
So you're in free fall and then you're raped by your trunks and then you get an enema.
Yeah.
It's, it's, I'll never do.
Why is that fun for anyone?
You know, fun.
I don't know why people, I don't know why anyone would want to go fucking just trapes around and other people's filth.
Yeah.
And have that kind of shit done.
Doesn't make any sense to me.
None.
And that's for men.
How women did that and didn't have those things just rip clean off.
I don't know.
Well, yeah, luckily for them, they're pretty watertight down there like a duck when they want to be.
Those things got to be just yanked right up their asshole.
So let's start out here with Cornell with one star.
As we dive back into this, we started it last week.
So I went to this park.
It is very dirty.
Okay.
So I went to this park.
The food is very expensive.
and when I use my thing to get the meal pass.
Wow, that's an interesting way to get a meal pass.
When I wave my dingling around, try to get my meal pass, they said it wasn't me.
I'm holding it.
It's me.
It's us, not you.
Says it wasn't me when I literally had my picture on it.
Wow, put your picture on your thing, huh?
Yeah.
So I do not recommend this water park.
The prices are very high for a day.
It's like 80-something bucks, so I do not recommend 80.
Yeah, it is expensive.
Are you to go to a Phoenix water park?
It was 40 when it opened, then it went to like 45, then 50, then 70.
It's just been going up.
I'll pay 2195 and not a set more.
Not doing it.
That's terrible.
Yeah, it's expensive.
Wow, the lifeguards are very rude to you.
They do not follow the rules.
They do not protect us.
me and my friends went a lot of other time
and they did not protect us.
That's why he's alone this time.
All his friends drowned in previous.
They're all dead.
They're all floating in the wave pool
just going around and around.
Luckily they're not taking up rafts anymore though,
so that's good.
That's helpful for all.
Jessica, wow, Jessica has some shit to say,
voluble.
Here we go.
Jessica, one star, not worth your money.
True.
Filthy, and most rides are closed.
Yeah, that's crazy.
way to call it.
Yeah.
Arrived shortly before opening time and no one was operating the park gate and checking
parking passes.
So everyone who parked in got, parked in got for free.
Great.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Positive.
Which is frustrating because we paid for parking in advance, so lost money on that one.
Oh, got it.
Didn't know I could scam the system.
So disappointed about that.
Two, the wave pool kept getting closed down for, quote, safety.
at 10 minute intervals, quote, unquote, which were more like 30 minutes each time.
Safety means there's shit in there.
Yeah.
And they need to scoop it out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Three, the Lazy River was shut down due to, quote, not having enough lifeguards.
Why the quote?
It's just not having enough life, they didn't have enough lifeguards.
That's what they told us.
So that's what we have to write in quotes.
Quote.
Four, the big rides that they have the giant rafts were only sharing two rafts all
day long while five more were sitting aside deflated, causing extremely long lines at extremely
long periods of time over an hour wait in the extreme 115 degree weather.
Oh.
Yeah.
That's why that place sucks.
You're not in the water the whole time and it's a buck 15 out.
It's awful.
It's punishing.
If you wait in line for any attraction here, you will be dry by the time it's your turn.
That's the crazy shit about Phoenix.
Like in New York, if you jump in a pool, you're wet for the rest of the afternoon.
Right.
Even if it's 90 degrees outside, you're damp for the rest of the afternoon.
In Phoenix, you jump in a pool, you come out 15 minutes later.
You are bone fucking, your jeans are dry.
Like you never got in.
The sun will dry jeans faster than my dryer.
What does that tell you?
That's terrifying.
Yeah.
So five, the entire place was filthy the moment they opened.
Obviously, no one sweeps up at the end of the day.
Six, the kid area was a huge letdown.
They were expecting hotter kids, and they didn't like the looks of these kids.
Huge letdown.
It went in there.
I've got stories about that place.
These kids aren't handsome.
The kids area is so dangerous, by the way.
The water is, I don't know how they do it.
They have a chiller of some sort.
The water is ice fucking cold.
You'll get hypothermia and sunburned at the exact same time.
That's awesome.
What a great.
I want to pay $80 for that.
That sounds awesome.
And there's poop.
Holy shit.
Anything else they can do?
They have like a jungle gym maze thing that you can wander through, but obviously it's soaking wet.
So slippery as fuck.
Yeah.
And you will blast your knee on shit.
Hitting your face on shit as you fall down.
Not a fucking nightmare.
That is horrible.
So the splash pad wasn't operating.
And the area with the kid pool and kid jungle gym.
literally smelt like feces.
Because it was.
Because there's a lot of feces.
That's why.
You know, it causes that smell?
Feces.
There's only one thing.
There will be poop, everybody.
The water was brown and it was disgusting in all caps.
Brown.
That explains the smell, I think.
Oof.
I refused to let my toddlers play in it.
So they only had a couple things that were open that met their height requirements.
Seven.
The little standalone snack bars were all closed except the dip in
dots. They had about eight stands and only one was in use. So the line was wrapping around the
place. Their excuse for not opening the other ones was, quote, schools tomorrow were not
opening the other stand. Schools tomorrow. Schools tomorrow. Oh, all right. It was on a Sunday,
the last day of summer break, and you're not going to go all out and let the kids have fun and
make the most of it. Okay. They'll get food at school. It's fine. They're going to school tomorrow.
They'll be all right. Tomorrow's Monday.
Listen, there's plenty of food at school.
Eight, the bar was closed.
That should be one for this person.
Let's get two drinks in them, and I think they would have had a better time.
Nine, the food was awful and tasted like it was day old food.
They also don't have lids for the drinks, so how do you manage to carry food and drinks back to your seat without spilling?
Ten, they ran out of raft rentals instantly, so we never got one, even though we were one of the firsts in the park.
You don't want those rafts anyway.
They are like sandpaper, and if you lay on it, it will, your nipples will be wrong all day.
They're probably hot too when you grab one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's that.
That's another thing about Arizona.
It's so hot, the rafts are too hot.
You have to turn them over, sit them on the pool for like three minutes and then turn them back over quickly before they get hot again.
Before they dry.
Before they dry and get hot immediately.
They're dark blue.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Brilliant move.
guys. Dark blue with yellow sides
and anything dark. Black and dark blue
are the two colors you don't want in the sun.
Nothing like that at all.
Pure greed and highway robbery.
They're showing a picture.
I thought the, oh my God. I thought, oh my God.
Jimmy, I thought the picture was the dirt
next to it. It is brown.
It's the water. Mudwater.
It looks like root beer.
It's, yeah.
It literally looks like iced tea.
Like if you dipped, it would come out like iced.
You can't put children in that.
There's also grass and like gravel nearby.
And people, so they have a big turf section in front of the wave pool.
So there's no dirt there.
But there's like dirt.
There's shit you had to walk through.
And so people put their feet in the dirt and then dunk that right in the water.
If you haven't been to Arizona, everything is covered in dirt and dust.
Everything.
Everything.
If you wash your car, 15 minutes later is covered in.
dust and dirt. It's just, it doesn't stop. And if there's no dust and dirt near you, if everything's
like a hardscape or a turf or grass, the wind will bring dirt from elsewhere. That's what I mean.
There's always dirt. There will be dirt and poop. Russell one star. I reviewed this place four
years ago and gave it five stars, but now I wish I could give it zero stars. I take back my
stars, people. I rescind my stars. Worst water park in Arizona now.
For a six flags property, this is a complete embarrassment.
It is six flags.
It is.
The wave pool was broken.
Garbage cans were overflowing everywhere.
They had so few tunes that even though it wasn't crowded, the lines took forever.
Tubes.
I'm like, so few tunes.
I couldn't even get my groove on.
I was like, what is he talking about?
I would not recommend this place to anyone.
The wave pool were just standing there to cool off.
The lazy river you had to walk through because of water park.
Your guess is as good as mine on that one.
I don't know.
The rides with large tubes that go up the ramp and split off into two rides only had three tubes, almost no line, but still took 30 minutes.
A lot of the lifeguards did not seem interested in their job.
The float rentals were scarce and sold out by 11 a.m.
Poof.
Health department should make a surprise visit.
Avoid this water park.
Yeah, I don't disagree.
Okay.
The bathroom picture is wild.
Yeah.
Everything is soaking wet.
So like the toilet paper soaking wet.
There's like wet toilet paper all over the toilet, the walls, the floor, just wet paper-machet toilet paper sucked everything.
That sounds about right.
It is horrifying.
Thomas, one star.
Oh, boy.
I have a nonverbal autistic child.
Oh.
And you brought them here?
Yeah.
I mean, maybe they want to go here.
some of the autistic kids like some of them don't like a lot of activity and some of them like a lot of stuff going on so you never know like lots of stimulation some need a lot and some want little it's a huge spectrum that varies a lot so nonverbal autistic child he's not able to ride big kid rides last year we almost went to the kids park i even rode with him on some of the rides this year they didn't let me ride last weekend and i thought nothing of it the weekend they told me
my son attends 50 inches could not ride he obviously couldn't understand i went to guest relations and
they said it was a safety issue i remind you last year i rode no problem so my son being two inches
over is ridiculous um said that sony so sonia so s o n i said that means the only thing he can do
is the pools and i have a pool in my neighborhood so i don't need this fucking shit yeah i asked for
We got a public pool at home.
Yeah.
I asked for a refund for my season pass and they said they have a no refund policy.
Don't go here if you have a child with a disability.
They don't consider it at all.
Yeah, come on.
Can't have some fucking.
No refund.
Jesus Christ.
Yeah.
It's not like people are faking it like they're going, hey, I'm going to try to get a refund.
Whatever you do, don't talk.
You're nonverbal.
Shut the fuck up.
They don't tell their kids that.
That's not what people do.
No refunds.
No refunds.
Physics one star.
I bought a season pass as well.
as the food and drink pass as a 15-year-old.
They are now refusing to service,
refusing service to 15-year-olds without a chaperone,
and I wasted all of my money.
This poor kid saved up.
He's like, I'm going to have the best fucking summer ever.
I'm going to go to fucking water park all the time.
It's going to be awesome.
And now he can't go.
He lives across the street.
I'm sure of it.
He just watches it.
He hears kids go, well, as the slide goes down.
He's like, fuck.
Looks at his season pass.
ass with his all you can drink and eat food pass and he's like,
I'm a bitch.
Oh my God.
Absolutely disgusting and money hungry.
I am the only one out of my friends who was 15 and spent all this money for nothing.
Absolutely disgusting.
Apparently if you're 16, you can go and all of his friends, he's just watching him go.
He's disgusted.
Disgusting, he keeps saying.
That's amazing.
Okay, Alyssa One Star came here a while ago back when it was wet and wild.
And it was pretty much, and it was much, much better then.
I paid a ridiculous amount to stand in line and get sunburned.
There are a reduced number of rides and shorter hours, 11 to 5.
I paid $15 for a small locker.
There was garbage everywhere.
Most of the rides were closed.
No one was monitoring the wave pool.
There were grown adults that kept flipping each other.
One of them eventually kicked me in the face.
Yeah.
That's Westside trash there is what you're encountering.
That's how that works.
Yeah, you just dealt with people that live near Metro Center.
Yeah, that's all you dealt with.
That's just a west side, baby.
You got sunny sloped.
That's what you got.
You got sunny fucking sloughed, baby.
Moon Valley, like a motherfucker.
Take that.
Yeah, deal with that Avondale, right in front of.
I took my brother here who was visiting from out of town and was excited to show him what a great place it was, but we both left very disappointed.
It's hard to believe this was owned by six flags.
Yeah.
Yeah, they don't give a shit.
They just want the money.
Wet and Wild did so great out there.
I remember.
It was the biggest attraction for water parks in Arizona for a minute.
And that's an Australian company.
And they had a couple others in the country.
And they were doing really well with them because they put in these things, these attract.
Like there's a big funnel that you go down a slide and go into the funnel.
And then you slow.
them around the funnel until you get puked out of the bottom of the funnel into the receiving
shit out of the pool. And it's actually, yeah, it's very fun. And then there's another one that's like
a half pipe. Yeah. For for tubes. So, and it has eight people in the tube. And it sounds interesting.
And it shoves your, your whole fucking party into this half pipe. And then you slalom and slalom until
you get puked in the room. So it was like, there was no other, there was no other recede. There was
no other water park that was like this one. Yeah. And so it did really well. But it's so fucking
hot. I mean, you're selling. Yeah. I mean, Jesus Christ.
But it's people of Phoenix that are shitting in the water. Yeah. So you get sick. And then
six flags, I guess they put it up for sale and Six Flags was like, what kind of money are you
making? We'll take it. And they have done nothing. Fucking nothing except change the sign.
Jesus Christ. Here's another one that we, like we heard before, Anson One Star. Me and my friends
came here to have a good time and you're trying to use our meal.
pass that we spent over $130
combined with the season pass and we
couldn't use it because they said it was not a picture
of my friend when it literally said
Joshua and it was a picture of him
from maybe a half a month ago
and they said that's not him and walked
away and never gave us our food.
So there's clearly a scam going on
and they are trying to catch it and
they're not doing
a good job because they're affecting people
that really paid.
Fuck yeah. Wow.
That's ridiculous, man.
That's too bad.
They just changed the sign, you said.
I didn't give that.
That's all they did.
You said, up, that's it.
That's it.
We're changing.
We put six flags up there, and that's good enough.
Good enough for me.
Dawn, one star.
Several rides were closed.
We were all in one of the pools and they made us get out due to short staffing.
When we asked if it would reopen, they told us to go to the lazy river.
It was also closed.
We asked someone why everything was closed.
And they laughed and said, oh, we're going to be closing even more.
Oh, you think this sucks.
Give it to half hour.
Oh, we have a good time while you can.
It's about to get miserable.
It's about to get real bad.
Meanwhile, all the lifeguards were, quote, meeting under this Ramada forever.
Big lifeguard meeting.
Yeah.
Disappointed because we had friends in town and didn't get to do hardly anything.
Also, the food is way overpriced.
A chicken strip meal was like $22.
Good Lord.
And that reviews from three years ago.
Oh, but it's more now.
I bet it's more now.
Yeah.
Um, okay, I like this. Harmony one star. Okay, here we go.
I love when they start out hot like that.
Went on one slide. That's all we could stand. Literally. It's hot, dirty. A lifeguard was so
sassy to my partner. As I was standing in line for what seemed like an eternity, kids kept cutting, which made the weight longer.
That's what sucks to those little kids. You can't be like, hey, motherfucker and punch an eight-year-old in the back of the head.
They do that.
They all cut their little pricks in these places.
Guy standing next to me commented on it too.
Rusty, leaky, faded paint, dirty, bathroom looked like a scary movie.
Man, oh, man.
If you were trying to escape the heat, there is no relief.
Couldn't drag me back.
Yeah.
Yeah, no relief.
Okay, let's ignore that one because I want to get to, yeah.
Okay, here's a couple.
Zulima, one star.
My family and I went to do, went to Hurricane Harbor, and it's not what we expected,
honestly. The staff didn't want to be there and we rented a cabana for $100.
There's cabanas now. Now we got cabanas going on here. It's literally $85 a day to get in and
then they hit you for a cabana of a hundred bucks. Fuck that. That's crazy. Man, not worth that much.
They're looking for a family of four to be spending $600 in a day here. With food and all that. Yes,
give us six. Like it's Disneyland except you have done. Again,
Disneyland, drop a gum wrapper on the ground, count to three, and look down and it is fucking gone.
A guy came and the thing and swept it up and then apologized for someone that was standing there.
Slam around here.
They had to see it.
You had to see that Trident wrapper hit the ground.
Holy shit.
Property value was plummeting.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry about that.
Okay.
So $100 not worth that much had holes in it.
It was really just awful.
Family bathrooms were disgusting.
smelled and just no one cleaned them.
Yeah.
Yeah, I would say so.
Okay.
DK.R.Y.
That's Donna Karen, not New York.
One star.
We purchased the season passes and I'm very regretful of it.
All the reviews about the nasty bathrooms is true.
Yes.
In the building where they serve food, I use that bedroom.
Amen. I think they mean bathroom. They said bedroom. I used that bathroom. Amen. One of the women's
bathrooms didn't have a lock and seemed vandalized. How do you vandalize a bathroom? If there was a toilet in it,
that's it. The sink to wash your hands had black crap floating in the sink. It was so gross.
Wish I had my phone to take a pick. Being this was my first time here, I wasn't really thinking the reviews are wrong.
and I was really thinking the reviews are wrong and it wasn't.
Many rides closed.
How frustrating.
Black crap floating in the sink, that's vomit, right?
Vommit or funk coming out of the drain?
Yeah, out of the drain.
I don't know.
A lot of people complaining about a lot of like beetles and shit in the pools and it's like,
you're in the desert, man.
That shit is there.
Those big beetles, the Palaverdi.
bugs and then like, also there's just a lot of weird bugs in the desert.
Yeah?
It really is.
A shitload of, uh, shitload of bugs here.
Um, okay, Sarah, one star.
So dot, dot, dot, dot.
Yeah.
Today was my first time at Hurricane Harbor.
My boyfriend and I were there for about an hour.
At about 5 p.m.
We were on the kid's jungle gym with the slides in the giant bucket.
My boyfriend turns the red wheel that sprays water and ended up spraying a father and
his kid walking by.
This man proceeds to yell.
us and flip us off.
Again.
I forgot about those.
Very west side.
Yeah.
You can spray bystanders with the
with the little guns up there.
Which is a, it's a water park.
They figure no one will care.
Get the fucking water.
You should be happy.
Everyone walking around's wet dripping.
What are you talking about?
Were you carrying court papers through the fucking joke?
What are you doing?
He was there to serve one of the lifeguards with paternity suit.
That was his thing.
He came in with his briefcase and his suit on.
He's very upset.
Very official.
Wow.
This man proceeded to yell at us and flip us off.
I said, sorry, but after he wouldn't stop, so then we told him to leave, leave us alone.
He then waits at the bottom of the slide for my boyfriend.
I'm going to punch him as he comes off the thing.
Being aggressive trying to start a fight with my man.
I told the lifeguard at the top of the slide that the man looks like he's trying to fight
my boyfriend. He said to let
security know. Can you go down the slide
and let them know when you're there at the bottom? That's
fine. Tell
the 16 year olds down there.
Yeah, go tell them. They'll take care of it.
We go down the slide and he's
there saying, you got a problem
trying to start a fight.
My boyfriend tells him that it's a water
park. People get sprayed.
On the fuck down.
Yeah, you're in a water park,
dude. And when we
and we walked away to stop the
situation from progressing once the lifeguards below we're calling security.
Next thing you know, we're being escorted by the police.
They don't ask us what happened.
The guy lied saying we started it and got escorted out for his, quote, safety or some
BS.
The conflict and resolution is disgraceful, and there's no way to talk to any customer service.
I'm deeply disappointed.
Do better.
Guy gets sprayed.
I try to help because he's trying to fight my boyfriend over one.
water at a water park in all caps.
And no one asked if we were okay after this guy tried to start a fight.
And we looked insane getting a police escort over that.
Do not recommend coming here.
We looked insane.
Getting escorted from the water park.
Everyone thinks you shit somewhere now.
This isn't good.
Well, it's a man and a woman being escorting out.
It looks like you were fucking somewhere.
You got caught fucking in a bucket or something.
You held yourself up in one of those big tubes
The fucking things come out of
Yeah
Somebody's genitals were out at the water park
For sure
Kids saw that dirtbags
People hissing at them as they leave
It's not good
That's so funny that a man just
Get sprayed by water
And then goes and tells people
They wanted to fight me
It's so dumb
Think about this
That guy has a kid he's with
That kid
Yeah
You don't want to see your dad
Being a douche like that
Yeah.
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This is the problem with Arizona, though, and heat.
When you're that hot, your trigger, your fuse is so short.
Any little thing will say.
you off. And if you get sprayed by water when you weren't expecting it or didn't want it,
you're going to have, you're going to get fucking upset.
Homicide detectives always say, that first heat wave of the summer, the murders have a little
extra stank to them. They're over something shorter. It's a lot, you know, two people in a house
that would, just a hot place that wouldn't have snapped on each other. Otherwise, it leads to a lot.
All right. Let's go to Philly. Let's get the fuck out of Phoenix and go across the country to
Philly to 1,000 East Tioga Street in Philadelphia here.
What's it?
This is the De La Parra Picapoyo in Philly.
It seems like a Dominican restaurant from what I understand here.
Something about chicken, yeah?
From the review.
Yes, yes, fried chicken is their specialty.
It has 3.7 stars.
Oh.
I do not want poultry.
A chicken shop?
Poultry has to be a 4.3 here above for me for poultry.
A 3.7 chicken store?
I'm not eating there.
Seafood has to be the 4.6.
Like, it's got to be really good.
Like, holy shit, it's so fresh.
That's what I want to hear from everything.
Chicken's four and a half or higher.
I'm not eating.
I'll give you a 4-2.
You never know.
Would you?
Maybe it's dry sometimes.
3-7 is crazy.
You got to look particulars because undercooked.
Overcooked, I'll give you.
Under, I'm out of here.
That's no good.
That's no good.
Well, let's find out what this place is all about from Allen.
Five stars.
Their food is incredible.
Best fried chicken I've ever had with the lemon sauce and the C-H-O-F-A-N.
I don't know how you say that.
Chafan?
It's a Dominican word, Dominican food here.
I don't know.
Chofan.
Cofan.
I don't know how the fuck you say it.
But it's amazing and flavorful.
And everything's on point with the ketchup and mayo sauce.
Definitely recommend checking it out.
Went with my wife, who's Dominican.
and the lady who worked there hooked us up with a box of Tostones.
So let's do that.
And he shows the chicken sitting there.
Looks fine.
Okay.
Christopher, five stars.
This place is the bomb.
Is it?
Yeah, this is a time traveler from 1996.
He came forward to tell us this place is the bomb.
Anybody...
A bag of chips, chips.
Oh, it is.
Anybody who talk trash about this place just don't understand Dominican food.
Is that right?
That's right.
Stay over there.
Stay over there with that negativity while I enjoy this amazing chicken and sipping on drink.
Yeah.
Bitch.
He should have put bitch at the end.
I think that would have been the only way to make it.
Those people are like Will Smith's parents, James.
They just don't understand.
They really don't.
They really don't.
Daryl, five stars.
I don't speak Spanish, but I understand it, but the rice is amazing.
That's the whole review.
I don't speak Spanish.
I understand it, but the rice is amazing.
All right.
It's just to let them know.
He knows what they said about him.
I know you said about me.
I heard you used that word.
I know what that means.
That's all.
I'm familiar.
Gary, three stars.
For me, the chicken wasn't good.
Okay.
For me.
For me.
I don't know what part of the Dominican Republic it's from, but it's not from the Dominican Republic.
Okay.
The chicken breast was okay.
The plan changed.
chips were okay. The fried rice was good. I think they can improve. But the chicken was seriously
bad. Didn't they just say chicken breasters okay? What are you talking about? I'll wait a few months
and try again. If they improve, I'll update my review. Thanks. It was burnt on the outside,
undercooked on the inside, and some pieces had fat stuck to the chicken, something white.
Huh? What? To the outside of the...
foreign object stuck to the outside of the chicken?
That's bubble gum.
What is that?
What is that?
Something white?
Is that congealed jizz?
What's in the fryer?
Is it the stuff that boils out of chicken sometimes?
I've never seen it stay on it.
That's what?
I haven't seen it weld itself to it in the fryer.
And you get that if you boil chicken.
Not if you fry it.
Or boil.
Yeah, that shit will come out sometimes.
If you, if you, if you, if you, if you,
fry it, it goes into the grease.
Yeah, it just disappears into the grease.
Nell Mari,
two stars. Currently,
the customer service is very poor.
Yeah. Currently.
The women treat you with an attitude and don't even
offer a smile, just throwing
orders around haphazardly, an exclamation point
for some reason.
I am a huge fan of Lepara Picapoyo
in NYC, but here in Philly,
they need to give it some character.
Besides, the ambiance is terrible.
At least some music and more attention would be nice.
It's not a nightclub.
Just get your chicken and go home.
Fuck are you talking about.
Ambiance in my chicken store.
And this person, this is from the original.
The original is, this is translated from Spanish.
So they speak it and know what they're doing in there too
and still are like, fuck these people.
So, okay.
John, one star.
The older lady behind the counter is racist,
allegedly. Allegedly.
You know, hey, listen, I am John O
on Google here, so I don't want this getting back to me on a big lawsuit
allegedly. I'm Puerto Rican, and I've been in this place a few times.
Puerto Ricans and Dominicans tend to. There's a little beef there
sometimes. I've been in this place a few times, and when she served us,
you could feel and see the difference between us Rican's
or anyone else and the Dominicans that she served there.
Definitely uncomfortable.
Us Ricans.
Us Reekins.
So definitely nicer to the Dominicans than anyone else in there.
Okay.
Interesting.
Just kind of what people do in ethnic restaurants.
Generally, yeah.
Yeah, it's...
Their favor...
Sure.
It's not racism as much as it's like,
this is much easier, so I'm doing this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know what it is.
is, yeah, it's an interesting, it's interesting.
But you see it in, like, in different kinds of ethnic restaurants.
But then, I don't know, it's weird.
They're excited if somebody comes in of theirs.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
They're like, hey, look, I can, yeah, look, you know what I mean?
It's one of those.
I don't know.
Yeah, it feels like home, I guess.
Yeah, especially a niche thing like Dominican is not, you know.
Yeah, that's not familiar everywhere.
Yeah, that's, yeah.
So, Briani, one star.
Some parts of the chicken wasn't fully cooked,
which disappointed me and made me feel disgusting.
Disgusting?
Disgusting. Disgusted.
Okay.
Which is even kind of weirder.
It made me feel disgusting.
Disappointed me and made me disgusted.
Both, which is very confusing for me because I've never been both of those things at the same time.
At the same time.
And the picture, honestly, doesn't really look undercooked because it's the chicken touching the bone.
Oh.
So you know that chicken touching the bone has red on it sometimes, but it's not because it's undercooked.
It's just.
Yeah.
I love legs.
That's, I'm on a legs kick right now that I make them in the air frit.
Because it's literally 250, James, for six, fat, motherfucker.
Nobody wants these pieces of shit.
Nobody wants them.
And I'm so happy about it.
TikTok has made everybody want thighs.
They used to be the cheapest thing in the world.
And now legs are my thing.
So I put them, I put six them in the air fryer, and I put them in for whatever.
I'm not giving it the recipe.
It doesn't matter.
Nobody gives a fuck.
But I roll them and then I'll roll them.
That vein or whatever the fuck that red thing is winds up on the top.
And I'll be a motherfucker if that's the most the most delicious thing on the planet, that little, whatever that red shit is on.
I want your chicken artery.
I don't know if I'm sucking chicken blood.
It is amazing.
It's got a main blood supply to the leg, I would imagine, probably.
It's my favorite.
Femoral artery has been.
Femeral artery is hot shit today, baby.
Get you a piece of that and suck on it.
Holy fuck.
But you got to know the chicken close to the bone looks like that.
That's how they get circulation is they're going to hide the veins closer to the bone.
It was a living thing at some point.
It's not.
Bodies generally push the veins deep for safety of the vein.
It helps.
It's easier.
Ramon, one star, got takeout for the claim they have the best chicken in the neighborhood.
It wrong.
It wrong.
It wrong.
I don't know, the neighborhood or their restaurant, but one of the two, it wrong.
It wrong.
I'll tell you that right now.
The chicken is considered basic.
Considered.
Other places around the neighborhood do better fried chicken for half the price.
There it is again, the chauphan, the chafon, we'll call it, had no flavor.
Dominican do not have the right to do chauphan without knowing how to properly cook or prepare.
How dare you, Dominicans, cook this without properly knowing how to prepare it?
How dare you?
Wow.
The price is just too high for what they are claiming.
And it says under his thing, price $30 to $50 a person.
For fried chicken, that's a lot.
I've seen that on several of the people's things.
That's got to be really.
It's really pricing.
It's got to be a lot of, is that per person?
That's what it says, but it says per person price and it's got the, you know,
30 to 50.
price per person, 30 to 50.
That is.
That's very high.
That's very high.
By the way, under, on parking, it says, parking is supper limited.
Supper limited.
At supper, it's limited.
Yeah.
Customers are not considerate of the neighbors and the neighborhood.
Double parked for extended periods of time on all sides causing unnecessary traffic.
That's their parking.
Their review of the parking.
One star from I'm Insane.
Okay.
One star.
I came in trying to get my daughter something quick so she won't be late to her class.
I asked the cashier how long she said five minutes.
I asked for a reason.
I ain't get my food till 25 minutes.
No punctuation.
It'll never be quick.
It's not going to be quick.
Wow.
I ain't get my food till after 25 minutes.
Go to a drive-thru if you want five-minute food.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's what you get.
Brandon, one star.
Ate here a couple months ago when I got sick right after I ate they food.
Oh, right.
And they prices are outrageous.
$15 for some chicken and fries.
Yeah.
They prices are outrageous.
They agree.
Seems like a lot.
Ooh.
Tohir John.
T-O-H-I-R-J-O-N.
That's a name, huh?
That's a name.
Very slow working food, wait, very slow working food baths.
One sentence.
That's it.
There is still working food bag.
Food bad.
I like this one because you don't know what's going on, but you know that there was some arguing that happened after that.
Oscar, one star.
I asked for something in delivery and though was playing game with me.
Though was playing game?
I guess they was playing game with me.
There was some arguing there, I assume, for sure.
Eric, one star, smell bad, slow.
service cross-contamination.
Oh, how do you know?
I guess they see it back there.
I guess you can probably see you in the back, maybe.
Future Tech, one star.
Hey!
Period.
Just hey, period.
Hey, that chicken needs to be fresh.
Hey, you.
Top of that.
Why are telling us?
Hey, that chicken needs to be fresh.
I ordered six pieces of chicken and toastone.
that they were,
the chicken was awful.
Don't serve that to Dominicans.
We know what good fried chicken is.
I gave the chicken to some stray cats.
Sorry, but fix your food and make it fresh.
All right.
Oh, my.
And that's from Spanish also.
Yeah.
Okay. Deznarda, one star.
I won't give it any stars.
So put that in your fucking pipe and smoke it.
They're overpriced,
and the food is freezing cold.
Freezing.
Freezing cold.
Yeah, gave me a burn.
All right.
To defrosted before my eyes.
Yeah.
And when you ask if they're going to make more fresh chicken, they say no so they can sell you freezing cold chicken.
And the plantain chips are even worse.
If they're going to provide service, at least make it good, even if it's dog food.
Right.
Or stray cat food in this case.
La Madre, one star.
It's not worth the weight or the price.
We waited 20 minutes because they supposedly fried the chicken fresh, but then gave us old chicken that had been fried twice, and the fries were cold, too.
That's terrible.
They threw it back in the friar for a refresh.
That's not good.
And they show a picture, and it just looks like some chicken wings.
One of the legs looks like it's been through a lot of frying.
It's got one of those big, hard, like...
Oh, at the top?
Like blackened...
Yeah, it's like half the...
a piece of chicken too.
It looks like garbage and the fries do look not good at all.
No, mushy.
Palucci, one star.
The worst food around.
It's worthless.
They're selling me bad meat.
Hey, they're selling me bad meat over here.
What the fuck?
This is crazy.
Oh, bad meat.
Okay, so let's get the hell out of there.
I'm not feeling too well.
We shouldn't have had that before we're going to do what we're doing now because we're going to
get on a really long flight and had a four.
far long distance away. Where are we going?
We're going to Australia, baby.
Yeah. What's that?
Here it is. The Edgecliff Lodge Motel.
Edgecliff.
Edgecliff Lodge Motel.
What is that?
Three-star hotel here.
I believe it is in, it's 3244 New South Head Road, Edgecliff, New South Wales, Australia.
Yeah.
Okay. That's where we are here.
This place has.
3.6 stars.
Mm-hmm.
Not good for a hotel.
Looks like 72 bucks a night.
Oh.
That is very cheap.
Incredibly affordable.
That's one where you know just from the prices that you're going to take...
You're going to take...
You're taking...
You're taking...
You're taking...
...home with you.
Yeah, for sure.
Victoria.
Five stars.
I was provided with excellent service from the hotel management, along with housekeeping.
Everything was super clean.
Great.
I bet they had lint rollers.
Sorry, that's an inside joke there.
They don't.
They do not, no.
Excellent location, easy access for getting around.
I would definitely stay again.
Great value for the money.
If you have a car, they have a parking garage.
That's good if you have a car.
Somewhere to put it.
Don't forget your converter, of course, if you need to purchase one.
They have a coal supermarket.
In America, it's pronounced the same, but ours is a department star, spelled K.O.
H-O-H-L-S.
This person thinks that's like the same company.
Yeah.
A department store, K-O-H-L-S and Kohl's supermarket in Australia.
Same company.
Same thing.
You pronounce it the same, so it's the same.
America has Aldi's like Sydney does.
Yes, America also has that piece of shit grocery store.
Yeah, I thought it was German.
Is it not Australian?
I thought it was German, Aldi.
It might be.
I think the owners are German.
I don't know if they started it in Germany, but I think the owners are German.
I'm not sure, though.
Maybe not.
Rooms here, they have it broken down.
Rooms.
If you've been on a cruise, it reminds you of staying on a cruise ship, except you had everything
you needed.
Some cruise ships do not have what Edgecliff Lodge Motel supplied.
The room included kitchenette, refrigerator, microwave, let out sleeper sofa, Wi-Fi,
a surprisingly great morning breakfast box, and included milk, cereal, fruit,
Role Bar.
Oh, very nice.
Nearby activities.
Marina nearby.
That's good.
Safety.
I felt very safe.
Whenever traveling, I do not stay out past 8 p.m.
What?
Whenever traveling?
Whenever traveling, I do not stay out past 8 p.m.
Make sure I'm in before dark.
Wow.
Why are you going anywhere if you're that terrified of everything?
Why are you going out anywhere?
Stay home.
8 p.m.
what happens before 8?
8 p.m. That's any fun. Nothing, not much. The heat. It's Australia. It's in Arizona. It's hot as
fuck. Paul, five stars. We recently spent five night at the Edgecliff Lodge Motel. It represents
really good value for what you pay. Room was clean and quiet, an internal room. The included
box breakfast containing cereal milk, fruit, juice, fruit and syrup, and a musli bar were a great start
for each day.
Train station was just up the road and bus stop across the street.
If you don't mind a walk to the city center, everything's walkable, darling harbors, et cetera.
We look forward to staying again in the future.
Okay.
Chris, two stars.
A little more realistic here.
218 room pretty gross.
Room 218.
That is a bummer because we're in this room.
This is where we are.
Now I knew it was gross in here.
I could smell it. Relatively good location to everything as we just got off a cruise and got a taxi to his place.
The room we have is pretty dirty. There's mold in a couple rooms on the ceilings. A couple rooms on the
ceilings in the bathroom and then the master bedroom you can see above me. What? They must mean,
something's been auto-corrected there. There's something on the ceiling. All fucked up. It looks like the aircon filters haven't
and clean, oh, clean pages.
I bet in ages is what they're going for.
We got woken up with water dripping from the ceiling into the room.
Oh, my God.
The whole room smelt damp, and my eyes were the less popular with the H spelling there.
My eyes wear puffy and sore when I woke up.
We did get a full refund straight away, as the staff suggested it was aircon related,
but it looks like it's been happening for a while.
And the bathrooms have no exhaust fans.
And there's signs saying that you have to leave the bathroom door closed and the bathroom window open as it will set the fire alarms off.
Your shit will set the fire alarms off if you don't open a window.
It's unfortunate.
What did you eat?
It just smells like burnt rubber and the smell sometimes.
Imagine if you sat down on the toilet, started shitting, and it set the fire alarm off.
Would you, how fast, I go to the emergency room, wouldn't you?
What is coming out of me?
Go to the emergency room.
You need a doctor if your shit sets off the smoke alone.
Like, this is terrible.
You are burning it up in there and you need help.
So, yeah, something that mimics the properties of smoke is coming from my asshole.
I need help.
Please.
There's carbon monoxide coming, leaking from my anus.
That's a problem.
That's bad, right, Doc?
Even in Australia, that's bad.
Show the filter or the air conditioner and it is.
You can't even see what it is.
It's just caked and shit.
It's disgusting.
All right.
Omar, two stars.
Strongly do not recommend.
Strongly do not.
Do not.
With cheaper price, you are getting subpar service and sacrifice and comfort.
In other words, to put it in less words, get what you pay for.
I think that's what he was going for there.
Yeah.
Funny that saying isn't, with cheaper price, you are getting subpar service and sacrificing comfort.
That'd be way less catchy at that point.
Basic necessities such as hot water and heater occasionally do not work.
Some residents of the motel, residence.
That's never good.
Unfortunately, are rowdy and threat to personal safety.
Yeah, some crazy Australians that live in a fucking motel.
People that live there are crazy.
Yeah.
Australians that live in a motel?
insane. Go to the opposite
side of the street. They're going to be nuts.
Motel.
So we did, after
the show in Denver,
I smoked a cigarette on
the street next to
I was smoking a joint too.
But there was a couple out there.
And the man spoke
and he goes,
he said,
I don't know, Oie, what do you do?
Is that a sick?
Whatever he said.
I wasn't around for this?
Where the hell is I?
I was at the Brown.
I was staying at a different.
Oh, we went to the other, that's right.
We broke off after the hotel.
He was so aggressive.
And he was, I mean, he was visiting.
This guy is doing fine with himself.
He could afford to fly from Australia to America.
He was so aggressive asking me what I'm smoking.
I'm just like, oh my God, calm down.
Everything's fine.
And he's like, what do you think I'm from?
And I'm like, well, it sounds like if you say, cunt, you'll do it very casually.
I think you're from Australia.
And he goes, oy.
They loved me.
Plus the fact that I feel like you're going to rugby punch me at any moment for no reason.
Any moment.
It's probably Australia.
Yeah.
We, God, ran into some South African guys one time and they were fucking nuts.
A group of South African guys saw us perform in Florida and went crazy.
And we're like, just like constantly screaming and chanting things like it was a soccer game.
It was the weirdest fucking thing in the world.
But they were fun.
They were good time.
I love them.
Continental breakfast, quote, unquote, as disqualful.
described in booking website is just two pieces of bread and cereal.
Continental breakfast. Make a cereal sandwich. Enjoy.
Very continental. Very continental.
Hotel management is very lax. Doesn't give you assurance that the reasonable steps have
been made to fix complaints.
All right.
Here we go. Henry, two stars.
Staying on the top floor, level four. Ooh, all the way up there.
Yeah.
No.
He ordered a high floor.
Noise insulation is terrible.
Some annoying knocking and plumbing noises and someone triggered my factory default car alarm.
Oh, perfect.
Oh, no.
Never had a problem with it ever.
Must be the fact that someone touched it or just curious.
Yeah.
Okay.
Placing the do not disturb sign is useless as it easily gets blown off because our room is on the top floor,
exposed to the rooftop elements, and hence the.
room service staff tried to come into our room just to restock the fridge with breakfast
supplies.
Luckily, we intervened and stopped her from entering.
Otherwise, it would have been an awkward moment.
They were fucking when someone tried to come in and, yeah, someone tried to give them shit.
Sky, two stars, too many weirdos making me feel uncomfortable.
That's the whole review.
That's a shit hotel.
That's what they do.
That's everywhere.
And the response from the owner, thank you for letting me.
us no. Sorry for that. We'll clear out the weirdos. Post-Ais. No problem. VH. One Star. The owner of this
property is rude and vulgar. That sounds like Australian. I was just going to say, or maybe just
Australian. We don't know. Where are you from? Upon changing rooms, I forgot to leave the room
card in the reception. When I came back in the afternoon, I was verbally abused by the owner
who refused to give me some of my belongings I left in the room. Oh, my.
go.
Oh, I can't the mine.
They're looking the lost and found.
They're mine now.
We only have a
bucket that's the lost. The found is in
the office. Yeah. Found is
in my house.
This incident led to the...
Fouts in the closet.
Led to the police being
involved. Would not recommend staying
there. Oh, God.
The Aussie police came in.
Yeah. That's got to be funny.
Shah one star.
Hands down, the worst place I've ever stayed.
Booked for two nights and left after the first night.
The location is good, but it's on a very busy road, so it's very noisy.
We found a used blood sugar monitoring strip on the ground in the bathroom when we checked in.
That's the difference between Australia and the United States.
In the United States, you find a used meth syringe.
Here, it's a blood sugar tester.
It's a little different.
I mean, if it was a blood sugar tester,
here. I'd still be grossed out. It's probably splattered in blood. It's definitely got blood on it,
for sure. But at least I'm not positive. That blood has at least hep C. You know what I mean?
Whereas that's here. Growing businesses deal with the same problem. Too many tools, too much back and
forth, and not enough time. Odu helps bring it all together. It's an all-in-one business management
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demo. It's ODOO.com. Okay. We found that. Didn't feel safe as Lyft doesn't have swipe-only
access. You don't have to scan your key in the elevator to get up. Okay. Yeah, the elevator, right,
Anyone can go up and down from the street.
Would absolutely not recommend extremely overpriced for what you get.
Listen, $72 isn't overpriced for a hotel for anything.
If you have a door, that's cheap still.
That's crazy.
Phoebe one star, hands down, worst place I've ever stayed.
Booked for 14 nights.
No.
Two weeks.
Left after the first day.
Ha? Wow. Got my losses. Holy shit. The location is on a very busy road, so it's very noisy, and a brisk walk uphill to the station. A front desk guy says no visitors. My manager is watching you and showed me a monitor of every single inch of the motel being constantly filmed and live showing at all times. Yeah, security cameras. The room smelled awful and musty. I could see how dirty the bathtub was. The worn-out,
discolored do not disturb slash make make room up door hanger was broken and disgusting old sticky
rubber band why was it sticky all caps yeah yeah yeah it's because there's sperm on it i assume that's why
everything everything in a shitty motel that's sticky i assume it's because it's covered in in human
fluids of some kind right yeah it could never be someone put their apple down there and no one wiped it
That's never going to be it, ever, ever, ever.
You're not allowed to have visitors?
Is this like a, you know, a hotel people do business in?
Yeah, yeah.
Some hotels make you put the amount of people that are in the room.
It's a bad hotel.
Yeah, that's a bad place.
Only bad hotels.
We stay in decent places now we're on the road.
None of them have ever said.
How many people are in you?
They don't care.
It's whatever you want.
How many card keys?
card keys would you like.
If you said 30,
they'd be like,
okay,
this is going to take a minute.
They would not bat an eye.
It's going to take one minute.
They just keep fucking throwing keys up
as they swiped them on,
wiped them on that little thing.
I didn't feel safe and chose
to live on the street
during my apartment's renovation.
What?
This person,
their apartment's getting renovated.
They checked in for 14 days.
They apparently would rather live on the street
and they choose to live on the street.
They refused to cancel the booking
or even shortening.
shorten it. So I'm guessing that's the only way they are still in business, rudely refusing any
cancellations or refunds. This person can't afford to stay anywhere else. So rather than stay here,
they're going to be homeless for two weeks because that's preferable to being here.
It's just much better. Wow. And then all caps, stay away. Yes, I think I will stay away from that.
Karen, one star. Oh, boy. Location is all this lodge has going for it. If you're
an asthmatic or prone to allergy, steer clear of this place.
Room has lots of mold and dust.
By the way, does mold have a U in it in Australia?
It does.
That's fun.
Okay.
And the wall behind the bed was covered in black mold and clearly had not been vacuumed under for
some time.
Bathroom also had lots of mold.
Okay, I'm done with the, after the first mention of mold, I'm leaving this room.
We're on mold count number three over here.
I coughed and sneezed the whole three nights I was there,
was unable to get a refund for two nights after suffering through the first night.
Yeah, they do not.
There is no refunds, motherfucker, period.
Minimal parking on site.
Yeah, it's literally, you're in here.
Fuck you.
Minimal parking on site and only ideal for small vehicles.
Okay.
Libby, one star.
We had a front room.
Lots of cockroaches and mice at night.
Mice?
What?
Roaches and mice?
I am...
Okay.
Those are different species.
We got insects and fucking mammals in here.
I can't deal with that.
You have a pest control problem
on a level that I've never heard of before.
Mice?
Multiple pests.
Yeah.
Multiple.
Usually one dominates and rules the roost here,
but this is,
they have a whole food system going.
You got mammals and rodents
and cockroaches?
What are those? Insects?
Insects.
And then the cat was hiding to catch the mouse.
And then there's a dog in the bathroom to catch that.
Eventually, there's an elephant that's just going to sit on your bed because he's afraid of the mouse.
You have animals with exoskeletons in the room.
No.
Yeah, that's not.
With vertebrates.
We have invertebrates and vertebrates in the state.
We can't have that.
We just can't.
Very noisy at night.
beds are hard.
No toasters in room, even though breakfast provided includes bread and raisin toast.
Very nice.
Great location, but terrible accommodation.
When you drive into a car park, if you have four-wheel drive, you will scrape your roof like we did.
Oh, that's nice.
A reminder forever.
How big of a truck do you have?
What are we?
And an Australia big truck is probably like a, you know, a mini here.
Tacoma.
Yeah, like something small.
on the small land.
You think they have
like a fucking
Dodge Ram
Hemmy over there?
I don't think so.
I doubt it.
They do have,
they have a lot of
fucking cars.
And they call Nissan's
Nissons.
Nissons.
Yeah,
I've heard that before.
A Nissen.
They like little tiny cars
in England though,
like little weird
Chinese cars.
Australian trucks
just by Googling it,
God damn.
They got a big,
open roof,
gun rack on top.
Right?
The trucks out.
These are fucking diesel.
Like 18 wheelers.
That's not what they drive.
Not a daily basis.
Yeah, they do have big trucks.
Okay.
Yeah, they have a lot of room in the outback.
Why not?
Go take it around the desert if you want.
Yeah.
It says 1.7 meters, but in fact, I would say 1.5 meters at lowest point.
1.7.
What is that?
That's 39 inches a meter, I believe.
It's five feet that 1.7.
That's crazy.
That's pretty low.
A five foot high, James, it would, my grill would hit the roof.
Yeah, your windshield would take off the top of your car.
I would have a convertible of my truck.
From the windshield back, shear it.
Five feet.
I mean, any car is higher than that, right?
Yeah.
I would, most, I would say not all.
And some cars are a little lower.
And yeah, my car isn't five feet.
My car car, it's not five feet.
One point seven meters.
crossover is. That's five feet. That thing comes up to my chin for my sake. That's pretty tall.
The roof clearance in the airport here is eight feet. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Christ in Arizona, too.
All these giant, lifted trucks. So this person ends it with very disappointed.
It's the word of the day. Disappointment is the word of the day here. Disappointing.
Kibx. Yeah. Okay. Our guests were not pleased with the overall experience. We booked them four nights,
after one night they checked out and we have to refund them.
This is some sort of travel thing here.
Now we have to seek a refund from the hotel.
The room was so bad.
It was not clean at all.
Used plastic cutlery were found on the floor.
Showerhead was dirty.
Plastic rubbish in the cupboard.
Chicken bone on the floor.
That's nice.
That's why there's mice.
Yes.
Stain spotted on the carpet.
The carpet was damp.
Actually, they say the carpet was dam.
But I think...
Maybe they mean it's damned.
Like it's been cursed.
I'll be damned.
I'll be damned.
The carpet was damned.
Straight to hell.
The room smell moist and sluggish.
Moist and sluggish.
Yeah.
Like a fat guy.
You just turned the hose on?
What are we talking about?
Moist and sluggish.
The room smell moist and sluggish.
Sofa bed have stain.
One of the heaters was not working.
noisy sound and room trembled in fear.
Is it possessed?
Is this room possessed?
Why is it?
Why do you?
Did the walls bleed?
That's what I'd like to know.
Right away.
Do we have any confirmation?
Is there an old lady in the top?
At all.
Did she look hot at first, but then not?
What are we talking about?
Then she laughed a lot and was all the part.
For no reason.
Our guests were very disappointed and caused mood stress.
Uh-huh.
Cause mood stress.
Okay.
The reception was not helpful.
When asked to come to the room, he ignored.
Even worse, it cost $910 for a four-night stay.
What?
Oh, what the fuck is going on?
$910 for $4.
For $4.00?
$72 right now.
What are we talking about?
For a piece of shit?
For this hunk of shit.
I am hoping to get either full refund or at least refund on the last three nights as our guests
checked out after four nights.
Morrow, this is fucking bad.
Okay, Kim, one star.
Not a good place.
No.
Not a good place.
That's it.
Not a good place.
Car park is, and it's spelled like Charles Barkley says it, terrible.
No I.
Terrible.
Just terrible.
Yeah, with the E, though, not the U, but still.
All right.
Terrible.
Terrible.
So, kind of like George W. Bush would say it.
Terrible.
You say, remember, tear.
We're fighting terror all over the world.
Terrible.
Terrible.
Terrible.
So small broke the whirly bird on top of our car when checking in.
What is a whirly bird?
What is a whirly bird on top of your car?
I don't understand what that is.
In America, that's on a house, and it's the thing that the exhaust goes out of in your
kitchen exhaust.
What the fuck is it?
What kind of cars do you have?
Does the exhaust come out of the top in your car?
What's happening?
Or is it one of those like nerds?
Gas goes in the dashboard.
That's, yeah, who knows?
How silly is it?
I'm not sure.
The fellow checking us in,
seen we had problems in the car park.
When I told him what happened,
his reply was, well, that's too bad.
That's too bad, mate.
Oh, that's too bad, mate.
And they go on with their business, all right?
Checked in rooms were okay.
went out later that night to return to nowhere to park the car.
Breakfast was not existing.
There was packet of cereal and juice, no bread even for toast.
Would never stay there again.
Noe on the end of that.
They should invest in some decent pillows.
Oh, and the pillows are awful.
And the pillow.
And a taller roof, it sounds like.
My friend, those are not pillows.
Oh, my God.
So, yeah, car park broke their way.
I'm still trying to figure out the whirly bird thing, but we've got to move on.
Not sure.
So, all right.
Will, one star.
For the price I paid for a family room, I could have gotten an apartment for half the price.
Half price.
Half the price.
When we first entered the supposedly family room, it smelled damp, and the carpet looked
as if it was still damp with stains.
The ceiling had mold, and tap water had a tinge of white in it.
white
tinge of white
okay
air is it air
like air bubbles
like in Phoenix
it's going to be something like that
there's deposits in the water
but that's gross it sounds worse
yeah either way
you're in
yeah that may wow that sounds disgusting
provided breakfast
with small packet of cereal
two stale pieces of bread
small orange juice and small milk
the bathroom shower head
wasn't secured in properly
and had to be pushed against the wall
to stay upright.
What?
The shower head was falling out of the wall.
That's crazy.
Just dangling.
Well, they made it, you know what they did?
They left it like that because they were like, people can use it like a wand now.
They can just pull on it and use it as a wand.
Rooms don't get vacuumed every day and I had to go down after hours, after a day out to get fresh towels.
Next day's breakfast, a plastic bag to empty out the rubbish bins, even though I had hung up a please make my room sign on the door handle outside.
What?
It's a shed hole.
It's just a dump.
They don't care.
I don't recommend this place to anyone with a family or with children.
You're better off at air, bed, and breakfast.
I don't think that's what it's called.
They said, air, bed, and breakfast.
They spelled the whole fucking thing out there.
Three separate, four separate words.
Air, bed, and breakfast.
That is very funny.
That is hilarious.
They don't have the app at all.
They're just like, I heard it's cheaper.
I got to find what that is.
Why how come I can't find air bed and breakfast?
This is crazy.
I don't get this.
I don't understand what's happening right now.
For half the price considering what you pay.
Yeah.
Okay.
Let us do one more.
And then we will end it here.
Okay.
Laura, one star.
If it gave me the option to give this motel no stars, I would.
Yes.
Yes.
we had to close strong,
so that someone who wasn't a complete moron.
Not only was the service discussing,
not discussing.
Discussing.
Discussing.
Discussing.
Not only was the service discussing.
That's a laugh.
Hi,
how you doing?
We talked about it for a while.
Yeah, it was very chatty.
They decided not to give me any.
That's how it worked with the service discussing.
The condition of the room on arrival was borderline pigsty with an e.
Okay.
I don't know.
Maybe that's Australian.
I'm not sure.
Borderline pigs.
Yeah, that could be different.
I will not recommend this motel to anyone.
I wouldn't even let my pet rabbit suffer in the conditions.
Oh.
Wow.
My pet rabbit, and he shits on everything.
Yeah.
He'll leave a fucking trail, you know where he's been.
To add to our negative experience, our credit card was also charged to further $60 for having hair dye on the, quote, living room carpets and part of the refrigerator missing.
say, why'd you take part of the refrigerator?
You got hair dye and took some of the fridge, or that was already there, and they decided for the privilege of having those two amenities, you get charged an extra $60.
I'm not sure.
Who's dying their hair in a hotel?
In this motel, I do not know.
Other than, like, wrestlers in the 80s, I'm not sure who did this.
So apparently I defaced motel furniture and changed hair color on my two nights day.
Jesus Christ.
Well, you would think being in prime position in Sydney, they would up their game, but instead they have missed the mark and disappointed customers and ruined their reputation of 3.2 stars.
That is not a reputation, sweetheart.
That is certainly not.
Wow.
Exposed pipes, damaged furniture, out of water, air conditioning in 30 years.
degree heat.
That's Celsius, by the way.
That's hot in Celsius terms.
And rude employees who are just a few reasons why I do not recommend.
These are a few of my favorite things, is what she just said.
Is there a few of my least favorite?
These are a few of my least favorite things.
Bold on my bathroom and missing fridge parts.
She can just go on for fucking ever.
Oh, not even good enough for my rabbit to fill.
fart.
What a piece of shit.
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