Your Stupid Opinions - Zombie Mall Cornhole, Ice Is Cold, The Art Of Disappointment

Episode Date: January 26, 2026

More of the funniest reviews on the internet! We read reviews for an ice skating rink, where people say the ice is too cold, and the bathrooms are compared to a bus station. An art museum, where the bathrooms are a bit too close to the door, and some furniture is "obviously" out of place. A dying shopping mall, that cares way more about what young women are wearing, than actually drawing in customers & much more!!   Join comedians James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman as they explore the most opinionated part of the internet: The Reviews Section!   Subscribe, and we will see you every Monday with Your Stupid Opinions!! Dont forget to rate & review!!   Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for merch & more Check out James & Jimmie's other podcasts, Small Town Murder & Crime In Sports on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts!!

Hello, everybody. Welcome back to your stupid opinions. Hey. Thank you so much for joining us today. My name is James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wiseman. We have more of complaints and grievances from people you don't want to meet talking about places you don't want to go. Why is it so fascinating? We wish we knew, but it's great. And we can't wait to get to more. Head over to shut up and give me murder. Oh, yeah. Not only is there tons of merchandise, get your tickets for the one, Your Stupid Opinions Live show. It is Phoenix, Arizona, May, or I'm sorry, March the 21st, March 21st, that stand up live. Get them now because they're almost gone.

So come in and see us. We're going to have a blast. It's going to be so much fun. Oh, it's going to be great. That's going to be the best show. I'm of all of our shows this year. That's what I'm most excited for. So can't wait for that.

That said, let's get right into this. Okay. No bullshit. Let's do it. Let's go to Long Island. What do you say? It's wintertime. This isn't Long Island, actually. No. Okay. The name of the place would beg to differ that it's not Long Island, but it's not in Long Island because it's pretty close to me. It is the Iceland Long Island skating rink. You would think that's in Iceland, Long Island. or Iceland, but it's in Long Island. No.

Yeah. This makes no sense. The description of this on Google, okay? This is all confusing. Yonkers. No, it's in New High Park, New York. The description of it on Google is supermarket chain supplying frozen packaged foods, often discounted, plus some dry groceries.

Okay. It's a skating rink. The pictures of it are kids skating around on ice. I don't understand what's happening in this place. I am fascinated, put it that way. Macaroni and cheese on Isle 6. Wow. 3.9 stars out of five, obviously.

326 reviews. Let's find out what people think. What do they think? Okay. Five stars from Jody. I love Island Long Island, not Iceland, Long Island, Island, Island, Skating Rink, because it is clean and the staff is friendly. That's a good reason.

I took ice skating lessons here as a child and had the best memories getting private lessons. That's good. At least she wasn't molested. That's a plus in this world. And I left with them hot pockets and a turkey. Yeah, it's great. I highly recommend coming here if you want to learn how to skate or want to take private lessons or their public skate sessions.

I would steer away from their food because there's better food options in the area. I think they're saying like a snack bar, not their grocery aisle like we're talking about. Their ice skating shop is also very nice if you need to buy anything, anything, they probably have it in stock. That's terrific. Jocelyn, four stars. Nice place, not too expensive. Nice staff. There weren't a lot of people.

I wish the food area was opened. Okay, the snack bar was closed. Yeah. Very cold. It's ice. Right. I think you should get that right away. So make sure to use layers, scarfs, and gloves, maybe even a hat, depending on your child.

Depending on if they have anything that you need to keep warm in there. Depending on if they've got a hair or not. If you forget, there's a dollar store across the street from the parking lot. Excellent. Joey, four stars. I don't know. This person knows what they're reviewing and they still leave this. Actually, I went to Polito Bakery right next door.

I didn't go to Iceland. Why are you leaving that review on there? What are you doing? What is that? You're not even saying if you like the bakery. Give us some something. James, two stars. Very cold rink.

It's fucking ice. It better be. If it's warmer, you're not going to be ice skating anymore. You're going to be right. It's called puddle running at that point. It's different. Dress warm and don't go to the bathroom. I've seen cleaner bathrooms in Penn Station.

Oh, that's not good. TML, two stars. Very old, crumbling, dated facility without even a snack bar. Apparently that snack bar is gone to us here. Orpa, two stars, could not thread old tattered laces. Ice skate heel was separating from the blade in the back, closed half early with no warning. Oh, this sounds pretty shitty. Yeah, everything's falling apart.

Yeah. Well, this person, Iwalena, her ice skates are all tore up here. She got pictures of her ice skates where they're just coming apart at the seams here. Yeah. She says, the ice is nice and smooth. The workers polite and helpful, but the skates are so old and broken. It takes over 40 minutes to find a pair that's decent enough so it won't break your ankles. Most of the skates they have belong in the trash.

These skates among them. These look like they belong in the fucking trash. Those are terrible looking. Renat, one star. Went there for a hockey game. Place looks like you're in the 60s or 70s. So old and dirty. smells bathrooms like public bathrooms in NYC.

This is sounding kind of cool, actually. Yeah. This is sounding kind of cool. I think I want to go here. And it seems no one cares. You don't want to be on ice rink area waiting or watching someone. You're going to freeze to death. You're going to freeze to death.

You're going to freeze to death. Shame on owners. It needs to be cold. First, let's put that out right away. It's got to be cold. It has to be cold. No complaining about the cold if you go to an ice rink, you fucking idiots, first of all.

Yeah. They cannot warm that. Science says so. I went to a tanning bed. Warm in there. Just warm. Which is cooler. Yeah.

Wear your bathing suit. Hot. Holy shit. Shame on the owners and local. Locals should call the authorities on them. Oh, because it's too cold. Too cold? Maybe the health department for the bathrooms.

I'm not sure what the hell they're talking about. They weren't very specific. Meg, one star. terrible place. Do not recommend. Arrived at 1.30 p.m. gladly took my money and nobody at the front desk mentioned that the rink would be closed at 2 p.m. for the public. So she got on and was like, ah, it took like one.

And they were like, everybody off. Let's go. It's closed. Private time. Yeah. Very poor business practice and just bad. My daughter paid $18 for 20 minutes. That's too much.

That's a little rough there. And the response from the owner, sorry you had a bad experience. We clearly have the session time listed at the cashier booth on a large monitor and on a large monitor at the entrance. And you still paid. You knew what you were getting and you paid for it. I mean, they probably should have said,

hey, you know that we're closing at it too. Yeah, yeah. But they just assumed. You sure you want to do this? Yeah. Stephen, one star. Locker rooms are tiny and freezing. Oh.

One more fucking person complains about the cold and an ice rink, I swear to Christ. Ice is not great. The lights have not worked for games. The scoreboard has not worked for games. The boards aren't great, meaning the sideboards that you get checked into. The place is basically a dump. But, hey, it's ice. When it rains, there are deep holes in the ice.

Rains. It's just got a roof on it. Yeah. I think we have bigger problems here. This place. About to get new ice. This place isn't holding water. Yeah, this is wild.

And for some reason, they killed all the bathrooms and showers after COVID. What do you need to shower there for? Right. Go home and shower. Go home. Bathroom is, I mean, that's where you need that. You need that. You got to be able to wash your hands.

That's kind of the idea when there's infectious disease. Wash your hands a lot. Unless you play in a professional sports league, there is no reason for you to shower in public. Zero. Zero. Not at the gym, not here. Keep your fucking clothes on, you weirdo. Getting your goddamn car and

drive home and take a shower like a normal person. You fucking gross assholes. I'm going to take my dick out. Yeah, or stay home, you fucking ambitious dicks. Patricia, one star. Not that great. Asked about private lessons for

my daughter, handed a blue paper and said to fill out and someone would get back to me. Filled out three and still no one calls. Asked at desk and was told to fill out another. We throw those out every week. Stanley one star. What do you got to stay for yourself? Stanley? That's hard to say fast. What do you got to say for yourself, Stanley? Stuttering Stanley is not easy to say.

No, what do you have to say for yourself stuttering Stanley? That's not easy. My kids coming here for years and today person who seat in front door and then in parentheses, very nasty guy comes with sandals. Comes equipped with sandals. We have a sandal edition guy at the front door. A little action figure with sandals in a separate little bubble there. Comes with sandals. Comes with sandals. His accessory.

told me that my kids are not allowed to be on ice today because ice is full. My kids coming here for a whole year with COVID and this never happened. Right. Less people there. Yeah. We spent so much money in this place and we'll never come back here and also and other parents also. This place has no system for people online or somehow to register to make sure we don't drive an hour in traffic and come back here for nothing. Very bad management and everything unorganized.

in this place. I'm so upset and never comes back here. Never comes back here. Never comes back, but they comes with sandals. That's it. Response from the owner comes with sandals. I wonder if this is nasty sandal man, the owner. Yeah. The incident occurred during the pandemic and the rink had to operate under restricted capacity as mandated. The customer was very rude toward the rink employee. The customer was, the employee was only doing his job as instructed, though this customer, you. This fabled customer from somewhere else, this customer said he will never come back and still regularly comes to the rink. Okay. Ian one star. The good. Price to skate is cheap. Rentals are also cheap. The bad. Okay. Very limited parking. Three pairs of rental skates and they're all

loose, wobbly broken. The ankles are not supported and they should all be jettisoned and replaced. The guys behind the table take one of your shoes in exchange for a pair of rental skates. So you have to walk along a watery floor with one socked foot, making the sock wet and cold inside the loosely fitting skate. That's miserable. A wet sock in anything is the worst. Can we have a, how about your driver's license? How about that? A credit card, maybe.

Your shoe? Your shoe. What the, what century are we in? Your shoe? Is that what you're taking? That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Wow. The facility does not appear to have been updated since 1987.

For some reason, the place was packed. Because there's ice. Yeah, yeah. There's a lot of little kids bumping into everyone. Well, you bump into them. They fall down. There you go. Done.

Problem solved. The ice was practically unscatable. Good luck going there. Yeah. Good luck to you. Only bring one shoe. One shoe. Apparently it is in Long Island.

Oh, is it? by the way, from what this person says. Apparently New High Park is in Long Island, which is crazy. The new one is, yeah. All right. Worst place on Long Island by far. My son's fingers got ran over by a speed skater that wasn't kicked off the ice after being hit by this mindless kid who happened to run over three of his fingers and give him teared tendons. Not torn.

He teared them. Yeah. It cost me 30. thousand dollars for people who are just teens that don't care if the older and more okay don't care this isn't me they don't care if the older and more retarded kids run over seventh and eighth grade fingers okay are you 12 this is it sounds like you're in eighth grade yeah 15 bucks in return for a 30 thousand dollar injury that took me from 100 to zero should have sued them yeah you should have sued who sued who

Who are you suing? I bet you anything it says skate at your own risk. Yeah, I'm sure you signed a waiver. Something happened. I mean, you can still sue for things if you sign a waiver. But you don't sue the plays. You're probably suing the people running over your fucking kid's hands. And in that scenario, they can't be expected to know if your kid's on the ground.

That's crazy. Right. This is, I would think this is like a baseball game. Like on the ticket, it says. Yeah. Watch out flying objects and shit. Yeah, you might get hit in the face with a bat. That's on you if you do, by the way.

Whereas I think this is the same thing. If you go on the ice, it's probably implicit that if you fall out and break your fucking leg, it's not my fault. Yeah. I hope anyway, because I would suck. Otherwise, I'd just go out. If I needed some money, I'd just go ice skating because I can't fall out and hurt myself. I do it. Fuck it.

You know, I'm not using all 10. Cindy, one star. The front desk is very rude. Were there sandals? That's what I want to know. How about the sandals? And don't answer my question friendly. Don't answer my question friendly.

The guy also charged me extra money for the ticket, which I only noticed later. Yeah. Okay. Alex one star, gross. There was piss everywhere. There we go. That's what I'm talking about. The locker rooms were smaller than my half bathroom and everything is old and outdated.

Awful place. Yeah. Awful. Next up, person, person dude is the full name. One star, gross. Locker room's super small. The ice is small, choppy and uneven. The boards are trash and it smells bad in there.

So this place sounds great. It's gross. Yeah. Seems like if you want to get some good skating in, it's fine. If you want to get staff, it's also fine. Well, I mean, that's just goes with the program, I think, right? So from there, let's leave the, the, Mall. I'm cold. Or let's leave this.

The rink. I'm cold. Let's go to the mall. What do you say? There's only one mall I want to go to, though, Jimmy. Oh, where is it? That's the West Ridge Mall in Topeka, Kansas. The West Ridge Mall. In Topeka, Kansas. Let's do it. Not the East Ridge. The West Ridge.

1801 Southwest Wannemaker Road, Topeka, Kansas. 3.6 stars out of 4,100 reviews. Wow. People do not like this place. Uh-uh. Except for this person. who gives it five stars. The new owners of the small,

I mean, I think they mean mall, are doing really great things, the small. It's nice to see all the businesses at one end and lots of people walking around the mall. It's starting to feel like the old days. Yeah. The free Thursday night bands is a really neat touch. It's too bad they're ending in November.

Kudos to the new owners. Okay. All right. They're killing it. Here is another five star. It looks like they're trying to make a tiny comeback. A tiny comeback. What?

I am an 80s girl from the White Lakes Mall era. What is that? Okay. I have no idea what that means. That's a very specific local reference. You've got to be from West Topeka to know that one. To the start of West Ridge, so it's super sad for the capital city not to have a decent mall. It can happen.

I have faith. And then it says coughs in parentheses, Aunt Annie's pretzels and Packs son. That's what she wants. She needs those. You really need that ocean gear when you're by the fucking Topeka, Kansas. That's, that pack sun gear. Gotta get my best rip curl t-shirt. Got to get my fucking peach-colored rip-curl t-shirt.

That's the only thing that's going to help. Jesse one star. Went in today and all escalators going down were not on. This was a big pain as I am currently on crutches. Took forever to find the elevator. Oh, all right. That makes sense. I'm not thinking about Mitch Headberg because...

Oh, yeah, yeah. Now it's stairs. Never broken. Never broken. Those are never out of order. Unless you're on crutches. We found the caveat. Or a wheelchair.

Yeah. David One Star. I thought the day after Christmas was supposed to be one of the busiest days of returning slash exchanging gifts. Not in this place. Still dead as ever. And there are several pictures of like whole wings of the mall with not a human being. It's fucking. This is the Omega Man Mall.

This is crazy. That's great. I am mall legend is what this place is. This is horrible. I don't mind it, but you know it's not going to last long if there's no people there. Vanessa, one star. If I could give less than one, I would. Less than one is zero.

What are you doing? Come on. Give us what we want, you assholes. This is from a year ago. We were telling people about this a year ago. You knew. At closing on Thursday. day after Christmas with all the Christmas decor,

the security guard stopped us and told my friend, they aren't allowed to take photos. Okay. What? The hell are you talking about? You're not allowed to take photos. What do you care? It's a fucking mall.

Why wouldn't you be able to, is it a Santa? What do you, not allowed to take pictures of? He's not even there. Don't take pictures of our reef. What the fuck are you talking about? I don't get it. This is why malls are dying. No, that's not why.

malls are dying. I've never heard of this before. I think probably Amazon is why malls are dying. This is a whole separate issue. A host of reasons. I've never heard of a privately owned mall enforcing a rule like this. And frankly, I'm offended by such a crusty looking unprofessional and unkempt security officer telling me and my friends some bogus made-up rule. I tried verifying this rule on their website to no avail. I hope the place goes out of business like everything else. else in this town. I was looking for that. I'll burn this motherfucker to the ground.

The list of rules. They have a rules web on the website. FAQ, no, not under there. Rules. Like, apparently everything else in Topeka has gone out of business. Wow. Rough going in Topeka. Dallin, Dallin, Dallon, I guess.

One star. This mall sucks, period. And he put a period after the period, too, which I love. Why is that so fun? It is so. It's the best review. This mall sucks. I picture it as an adult saying it and like a very frustrated one that just can't get anything out except for this place sucks.

This place sucks. Plus, if there was a mall and I was like, how's that mall? You'd be like, that place sucks. It was just very normal. Don't go there. It sucks. One of the worst malls I've ever been to. Almost all the store.

fronts were closed and there were hardly any good ones open. I guess if you want to walk around for no good reason, this is the place to go. There's a good reason just to walk. Yeah, I bet you anything, this place is full of old people when they open their doors, just those walking old people. That's real popular. They're fucking old Reevox. Oh, yeah, and they're jogging suits. Yeah.

Doing that weird power walk shit they do. Cindy, one star. What do they call that? They call it something. I don't know. Power walking, I thought. Is it, no, there's, there was a lady that, that had a video that was, it's like gym, gymnast, uh, acro, arabo, uh, I don't know. There's a word for, for walking that with like, where you high step and fucking, with a one pound weights in each hand.

Yeah, right. It's like an aerobic, an aerobic workout while, aerobic, aerobo, aerobic, we'll find out in 40 years when we're old enough to do that. Yeah, I got time. Indy one star. This mall is empty and sad. That's a good one. Too sad is always good for a business. For the longest time, there were only stores catering to the toothpick teeny boppers. And toothpick, teeny boppers.

Skinny girls. Yeah, I guess. And almost nothing for the adults. The mall definitely didn't have many stores that had, quote, real people sizes that were fashionable, stylish, and trendy. People that have had a cheeseburger today. They just had one guy who made tents. and he'd do some work for you, but other than that, they had nothing.

This guy, he makes big tarps for the circus. He'll wrap something around. You don't worry about it. That was their mall. All you normal-sized people. All you real people. The result is now an empty rundown shell of a place

with nothing to offer. I don't see how the couple stores left stay in business. Okay. All right, that makes sense. I always wonder that when you go into one of these malls. Yeah. I've been to these, like, dead malls, and you're like, how the fuck is it?

How do you pay human beings to stand in there all day? Yeah. In Phoenix, there was a few of them that when you walk in, you're like, oh, this isn't going to go well. What's that mall? Isn't it Atlanta? Across from that place looks like shit too. Like it's going to go, what is it? In Buckhead over there?

Yeah, it's in Buckhead. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's across that freeway from the, it's a big fucking place. There's a lot of people in there, though. And nothing happened. No, no, no. There's no. You could buy a lot of sneakers, pretty much.

That's what they had in there. And airbrushed for me. They were airbrushing all kinds of clothes. If you want to airbrush your brand new Jordans, that was the place to go. I'm not even joking. Yeah. That's a sad part. We're not kidding.

This is a, that's what the mall was. Jay, one star. Besides a janitor, I was the only other person in the mall at noon. That can't be good. Majority of the stores are just gone. It's sad. This is a big like double-decker, two-story mall, too. This isn't like...

A lot of square footage. This is a big fucking mall. Like, in 1993, this mall was probably the shit. Everybody went there, but it is dead as hell now. Robert, one star, bulldoze this place. It's dead. When a mall has... You should see when his grandfather died.

He had a lot of words for that. When a mall has to put checkers and cornhole in the building to get people to stick around, or when it's the place the elderly go to exercise, or do the old man morning coffee and gossip roundtable, it's time to move on. What is going on? There is cornhole and checkers? Checkers. They just want old people to spend the day here. It feels like come walking.

And that old man round table where they each pay 68 cents for a cup of coffee, then sit there for three hours. and be grumpy. Wow. Seriously, why anyone still has a shop in this place blows my mind. Only thing this mall is good for now is to drive through the parking lot to avoid one wantemaker traffic. It's the main road traffic. Wow. Yeah, that is sad when you see that.

It is just sad. I don't even know what the hell this is. This name doesn't matter. One star, a shell of its former self. It is. Yeah. It used to be so beautiful. A shell.

So glamorous. It's a shell. This baron, not spelled correctly, they spelled baron like a baron, like the red baron. Baron Vaughn something or other. Yeah. This barren wasteland. Like the red one? Yeah, this is a red baron pizza wasteland.

This red baron pizza wasteland does still house a few shops. But given this is the capital of Kansas and this was the epicenter of what? Of the capital of Kansas? What does that mean to? anyone else outside of Topeka. It holds little to no value now. Everyone is, quote, buying it cheaper online and has really started to reflect. Funneling all the U.S. dollars out of the states is transparent when visiting these

types of establishments. What? On a side note, I was here at just a tad after 5 p.m. on a Saturday night, and there were maybe 10 people, and most of the shops were already closed that were established, like, lids, et cetera. Yeah, if you can't even get in. The lids is the last thing to go in a mall, by the way. Yeah.

It's so easy to sell a fucking hat. It's the last thing to go. It's just a guy sitting there. There is no way to entice people to visit. What about cornhole and checkers? What happened? This mall is dead. Uh-huh.

All right. Kevton. Kevin with a T. Kevton? I don't think we've ever seen that name before, ever. Kevton. Why? I don't know.

One star. Almost threw up in the line to get tickets to the carnival in the parking lot because of the food stand smell. They had a shitty carnival with crackheads doing fucking tilto-wurls out in the parking lot. Yeah. They went to that and then reviewed them all. Oh, boy. You misunderstood the assignment, sir. That doesn't work.

Andrew, one star. I was hoping to spend my day off there with my fiancee shopping. Why? Why? What the fuck are you doing? Why are you mad at her? What'd she do? It's my one day off, sweetheart.

Let's go to the dead mall and shop. I'll make you go. How do you feel about an airbrushed hat? Does that sound good to you right now? Because I can get you one. We were stopped by a timid security officer who told us that my fiancions. fiance's cut-off shirt was not up to their dress code and we needed to leave. Oh.

I don't want to see her midriff. I'm tired of seeing your girl's belly button. You need to get the fuck out of here. Kansas, what is going on? Look, look what this did to my crotchal region. Yeah. Look at me. God damn.

Anytime there's a dress code like that at the fucking mall, it's because somebody can't control them. Yeah. It's because somebody had their dick out at one point and they went, all right, let's put a stop to this. Rather than saying all dicks get put away, you need to look. I can't imagine a rule like that. Like, I don't know, I've never really been to Kansas that much. But like in New York, if you tried to, if a security officer said her, that you guys need to go, her shirt's too short, that would be a war, I feel like that. We're not leaving, first of all. What's the matter? She's too old for you? Like that. Oh, maybe she don't have a dick. Is that what your fucking problem is? What's your fucking problem is? What's your? wrong with you and there would be a fucking 48 person brawl in three minutes you can't do that. Telling people how to

dress. Can't tell me what clothes to be no. If everything's put away, fuck off. Yep. Nips and dicks are covered. Great. That's it. That's all we got here. No dress code is posted anywhere. Her shirt was in no way indecent. I do not appreciate

having my fiancee body shamed by these people. Well, it was more clothes shaming than body shaming. They didn't say tell her to cover up her fat gut. That would have been body shaming. Yeah, body shaming is usually the opposite. It's not what you're saying it is, sir. No, we will not be returning. Okay. I want to beat off to her. Can you put that way? That's not shaming. That's not shaming, no. That's just gross. That's just, you're a fucking weirdo looking at other people way too closely. Yeah. Anthony One Star, explain to me how the great

malls of the area are gone. The great malls of the area. The great malls of America. of our history. Yeah. And this soulless, wretched place is still open. Uh-huh. I've never been to a mall with such a terrible selection of stores. Really? Really?

You've never been to a dead mall before? It's fun. It's fun. It's quiet. You got to talk quiet. It's weird. It's eerie and bizarre. Yeah.

It's so great. It is. This used to be hustle bustle. You know what it feels like? Remember in high school, if there was like some sort of after school event or something you had to go to a basketball early. And you go and there's nobody in the hallways and it's quiet and it's like, whoa, this is creepy. I'm not supposed to be here.

That's what it feels like to be in a dead mall. It feels like you're in a school at 430. You're like, this is fucked up, man. Even the teachers are gone. This is weird. Gerald, one star. If this mall didn't have so many policies against teens, it might have survived. Looked like a ghost town.

Filled with walkers with no interest in shopping at all. Yeah. That might be the thing that killed malls. Yeah, if teenagers don't go there, then what are you going to do? That's, they go there. We're all working until five. You close at seven. We're not coming.

No, and then guess what? After 8 p.m. on a Friday or after 7 on a Friday, adults don't go to the mall. They go out to dinner if they're doing something. They go to a bar. They do something adult. That's when kids were the only people at the fucking mall. Yeah. You don't serve alcohol at the mall.

I'm not coming. Not coming. Misty one star. I paid $15 for the ultimate wash, and I don't believe I got my money's worth. The ultimate wash? What was there, a car wash in this mall? I'm just going to say it. That's probably because you went to a mall to get your car wash,

so you're probably not satisfied with the results. Why'd you drive your Miata through the food court, you fuck? Jesus Christ. What used to be a food court? Over there, where the hot dog on a stick used to be. You can't park your Kia in the fucking Orange Julius. This is post-up, this is like the postman was filmed here. This place is awful.

Hannah, one-star. This is in all caps with very little fucking punctuation. So, bear with me. Here we go. I just want to point out that it's complete and utter bullshit that your mall cops chase females around the mall that are wearing crop tops. They what? Come back here. I want to feel it.

What the fuck? Hey, bitch, I'm talking to you. Oh, my God. That's like one of the only periods. Okay. Myself and several of my friends have been harassed and threatened by multiple of your security guards for wearing a shirt we bought from stores in the same mall. Yeah, you can't tell these people not to wear. It's crazy.

Unless there's a victorious secret and you think it's okay just to walk around in that. Frederick's of Hollywood with an open crouched panty. Maybe don't wear that. Let's please not wear that into Dillards. Possibly. wise, whatever. Yeah. I was minding my own business actually on my way out when a female security guard literally

chased me down to tell me to buy a new shirt or leave. Maybe this is just how they sell things now. We don't like your clothes. Go to Dick's sporting goods and buy a jersey. Yeah. It's like going to a football game and it got cold out, so you're going to buy a sweatshirt. You know what I mean? And on over to the team shop, would you?

It's happening. How was I disrupting anyone? Not to mention, I was barely showing an inch of my stomach on a hundred plus degree day. And Kansas heat is heat. Yeah. Hoof. Wow. You can't wear shirts showing your stomach.

And then please explain to me why a 22-year-old adult female who's not disrupting a single person gets kicked out of a mall. Great question. Yeah. Jesus. Post signs. Get rid of the store selling crop tops, I guess. Question mark. Like, is that what you want?

Yeah. Or leave people alone. Three explanation. That's the answer. Shut the fuck up and stop looking at people. How about that? We come in there and give your stores money and pay for you guys to keep your lights on. How can you tell us what we can and can't wear? I guess this is just another reason on the list why more and more people aren't supporting this business and more and more stores are closing down to never reopen. And more people find this mall a joke. My peers, family, and I are absolutely never returning to give you business until this issue is a drag. And I think she's a hundred percent right. This is some weird shit. Whenever grown men are looking at, I know, that she's 22, but you know, if she's 16, they're still going to come up to her and say that.

Gross. Fucking gross. Tanya, one star. Very cold, dirty bathrooms. We did not enjoy our time in the mall. We will not be going back. Say those three things again? Very cold.

Dirty bathrooms. rooms. Oh, it's just two things. Two things. Yeah. What is this? The fucking... The ice rink.

Yeah. What are you? The Iceland skating rink now. Penny, one star. Yeah. Don't stay at the hotel if you have a disability. There's a hotel here now. They turned the mall into a hotel?

What the fuck is happening? No, this was from a few years ago. So apparently had a hotel somewhere in here at some point. I was interrogated because I have a service dog and treated like an unwelcome intruder. Yeah. Okay. can't refuse service dogs. That is against the law, my friends.

In L.A. now, there, I saw, I saw something that people are being, they're trying to figure, there were signs posted that said, service animal fraud is a felony. And they're like, they're asking for paperwork now. Oh, my God. Well, yeah, everybody just comes with their dog. That's like that shaky one that I was sitting next to where she's like, he smells. Yeah. Yeah, he smells seizures. And it's just a shaky. little poop fucking thing and I'm like that dog is having a seizure. What the fuck are you talking about? Is he smelling one right now? Because I'm seeing one.

This is his signal that he's, this is how he shows you. There's a seizure imminent. Yeah. So, yeah, that's fucking ridiculous. Jeline, one star. This is a good review too. Most stores have gone very very eerie to walk the

empty halls. Yeah, that's what we're saying. It's a dying concern. She means she's afraid of getting murdered or the mall's dying? Who are you concerned with the death of? What's happening? She's got a lot of answering to do. She's being real vague. I got a lot of questions for you.

Is this like a, is this in code? Yeah. Is this what it feels like? Just in one star. The best thing about this place is you don't have to drive around looking for a parking spot. That is nice. That is nice. The defunct malls have huge parking lots of property in them.

Great parking. Great parking. enough for a shitty carnival. Fuck yeah. Tim, one star. Security is extremely rude and aggressive over stupid stuff like I had my hood on. No joke.

I got told I had to take it off or get kicked out. Beh, get out. Why do you want your hood on indoors? I don't know. I mean, if it's a teenager, whatever. Who gives a shit? But an adult wandering around with your hood up, I think you're up to no good.

Yeah, but I mean, your face is showing. Who cares? I suppose. What's the difference between that and a fucking one of those like plaid hats that fucking farmers wear. You know what I mean? They cover their ears and shit. What's the difference?

The Home Depot logo guy? Yeah, yeah. Fucking that deal. The Homer Fudd hat. If you can wear an Elmer Fudd, would they kick us somebody out for an Elmer Fudd? Same thing. Heads covered down to your neck. There are hoodies that cover, like they cover a lot.

Like the one I'm wearing right now. If you pull the strings, you can. You can make your face an asshole like Kenny from South Park. This is like a Star Wars cloak, this fucking thing. It's the craziest thing. I don't know why this hood is so big. That's the worst feature. It drives me nuts.

But, James, it was $18. Oh, that's good. I'm not going to fight. When you put it on, you go, well, Augusta Wind will take that right off my head. It doesn't even touch in any part of me. Ridiculous. Alfred, one star. They're so concerned about your clothes here.

This is crazy. It's wild. Alfred One Star, stores keep closing. They need to bring back Burlington or more stylish plus-sized clothing. Hold on. There's not a mall in this country that needs a Burlington. Burlington comes in. That's your death throw.

Yeah. Burlington moves in. Burlington is in the shit neighborhood and you have to earn that. Yeah. A Sears has to die there first before a Burlington moves in. Burlington can thrive. That's how it works. Or an old discount furniture store.

Either way, it's in a bad neighborhood, and you have to earn that discounted product. Burlington needs to take the nutrients from the soil of the dead store, and then it grows at Burlington there. You pour a little water on it. You don't put a Burlington next to a fucking JCPenney? No, or next to any real business. Robinson's May, Maysies? You can't do that.

No. There's a Pandora, a five-step. away. No, not happening. Not happening. Nope. Nope. So yeah, need to bring back the plus size clothing. Bruce, one star. I don't know what the fuck this means, but I'll read it. Daly Anderson is rude and does not represent this mall well. He's basically a bully. Is that the guy that told her to put a new shirt on? I think he's the guy with the clothing policy. His name's Daly? D.L.E. Y. Anderson. I don't know. And then Chelsea, one star, sadly, the mall is mostly empty. And there are way to, there are way too many unsupervised kids running around trying to fight each other. That's what

kids do. That's a mall, babe. That's a mall. Okay. Now, okay, we've been to an ice skating rink on Long Island. We've been to a dying mall in Topeka. I think it's time, we have flexed our trash muscles enough. Let's get some culture. What do you say? Let's culture ourselves, Jim. We're going to the Newark Museum of Art. What is art in Newark? It's displays of American art, interior decor, and more plus a planetarium and interactive nature exhibit. Sounds great. Yeah, it's an old museum. I mean, it's been around since before Newark was shitty. Okay. So, by far. It's a nice place. Decent, 49 Washington Street, Newark, New Jersey. Jersey and let's see, 4.6 stars out of 2,000 reviews.

Oh, wow. So pretty damn good, it seems like here. Yeah, we got to, oh, you know what, let's cover our bellies. Here we go. Take our hoods off when we go on this place. I don't know, Newark, it's kind of encouraged. It's fine, yeah. Diana, five stars.

We had a wonderful day at the museum. We were amazed when we arrived and they were hosting a special event celebrating the Chinese New Year. We enter for free and enjoy all the activities. They offered a show in the planetarium, and it's pretty educational. It's truly a beautiful building. On the third floor, they have animals, a cave for children to play, and a wall bringing to life the children's art. That was our favorite part.

She spelled that all weird, so that took a second to figure out what the hell are talking about. They also have a good gift shop with a big variety of attractive items. About the parking, I parked on the street and paid the meter through the app. I have no complaints. We had a very nice day. Okay. That's five stars. Not bad.

Love it. Nakia, three stars. A customer from my job had came in and suggested I visit. So on my day off, that's exactly what I did. I was blown away. Three stars, though, blown away. I was left amazed and had a satisfying visit. I even shared my favorites.

However, the first floor bathroom by the entrance was a big disappointment. The stench and nastiness of the condition of the used, unflushed toilets to say the least, had me run in and out very quickly after usage. That should be every public toilet. Yeah, but that's on the people of Newark. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, they should clean it more, but you don't know if it's the middle of a day or, you know, maybe the times.

They probably don't clean it in the middle of a day because then they have to close it and then you can't piss there and you'd complain at the bathroom. You'd close to it was closed. Right. Yeah. And this is also the one by the front door, so it probably gets the most use. Oh, that's the most. Let me piss real quick before we leave, you know.

Or whatever. Let me, yeah, I got a, I got something. I got something that is going to come out. Fuck out of here. I'm going to leave my lunch in Newark, so let's do this. Please do better in regards to the upkeeping of your bathrooms. For that reason, I may or may not return with my grandbaby. Fine.

Maybe I won't. I'm not sure yet. I would have given five stars, yet I was traumatized at the end of my visit. That's how bad it was, James. If you ever been to a baseball game, get the fuck out of here. Traumatized by human poop. I saw shit. You ever been to Yankee Stadium back in the day?

The whole place smelled like piss. Go in one of the bathrooms. That's traumatizing. I saw shit. Then I went out into the streets of Newark and smelled it. You ever seen the Sun Devil Stadium Piss Troth? You ever been there? Yeah.

That's traumatizing. The Firebird Raceway Troth. They had a shit trough. There was ice in it? Oh, yeah. There's always ice in it. And there were, it was like a porcelain trough.

One of those old ones that had the little button, the water pipe that had the button. Everybody had to rinse their section of the trough. Fuck of that. No way. Well, I'm eight. there are grown men on either side of me with their dicks nearly touching the ice. And I'm like trying to not touch anything. Plus their dicks are eye level to you.

So you're like, this is just great. I love being in here. Eye level with adult penises. Terrific. Giant drunken motorhead naked penis right in your face. And she's traumatized by a little shit in the toilet. Fuck you. Try me, lady.

Yeah. Was there a white trashed penis in your face? No. A dude and a shirt that says Big Johnson on it. Oh, God. Something wearing something from the Big Dog collection? No. You didn't have that happen.

The Big. The Big Dog's summer collection. The Summer Collection. Oh, fuck. It's fucking beautiful. Man, my face hurts now. Oh, shit. Tiffany, three stars.

Yeah. Okay. The museum houses a coffee shop called PJs and a gift shop. They also have a coat check. The staff are very friendly and kind. The space is nice to spend an afternoon, but I would skip the coffee shop. Well, it's not called the Newark Museum of Art and Coffee. It's just of art.

And if you get some coffee, great. Could you check your coat and go see art? I think you've won. Yeah. I went to the Museum of Natural History with my daughter a few years ago, and I never thought once, we got like snacks and shit. Never, when thinking about the museum as a whole leaving, I never was like, nah, I don't know, three stars.

That hot dog wasn't that great I had in there. I never thought about it. Yeah, I mean, I did see a fucking, a complete whale put together, and I saw a Tauranosaurus wrecks, but I don't know. Their hot chocolate was a little runny. It was a little weak. Ed Dijon mustard. What the fuck?

I don't care for that. They had the ketchup with just a big pump. You don't know what's in there. Yeah, that's gross. Yeah, I don't. And every time, the first pump, all water. What the fuck? All water.

Every time. You got to shoot that one into the ground. You just got to shoot it into a napkin. Yep, there you go. That's for all my dead homies there. It's caught. It's right out of little ketchup. Yeah.

Pour out that ketchup water. For all my dead homies. That's how it works. Okay. Dash gives three stars. Super cool. I've been to this museum three times in the last month. I'm not impressed with the remodel. It still looks a bit run down. Deskwoman is not friendly. However, the layout, the pieces in the museum and the museum itself are gems. I brought a couple of friends to the

museum and they were very impressed by the exhibits. The staff that work within the museum are extremely helpful and knowledgeable. I'm also happy that residents and students get in free. If you're a New Jersey resident or a student, you get in free. That's nice. This place must be incredible. Have you ever had a local museum that you went to three times in a fucking month? Not in a month. We go to the ones like the houses up here.

Like we'll go to the FDR mansion and the Vanderbilt Mansion. That's just to walk the grounds because it's a beautiful place to walk in the fall. They must have had an exhibit. You know what I mean? Something just a piece there for three weeks or whatever. Something travel. There had to be. I don't have anything near me that I can go to every fucking month three times.

We did go twice to see the ice yachts. That was cool because we brought people there. You ever seen ice yachting? They go like 100 fucking 20 miles an hour on the ice. It's just a, it looks like a big long platform with a fucking sail that could take a pirate ship across the Atlantic. And when the winds are really crazy, you go out on like a frozen lake or frozen rivers and they fucking fly. I mean, it's crazy.

How do they turn? They have like a thing that you can adjust the sale. It's on ice? It is, when we're done here, look up ice yachting. You will go. It's the scariest looking thing I've ever seen. Any little fuck up, you are dead as shit. It's crazy looking.

Yeah, but I thought that I'd heard of every type of race vehicle. Oh, ice yachts. They go over 100 miles an hour. They're insane. It's not like it's an actual boat. It's like a, it had with an ice skate on the bottom of it, basically. One of the tiny glades or is it a single boat? It's like a, it's like a boat, but it's got like a platform kind of because you're not, you don't

have to hold water. You're on the ice. So it's a different type of thing. But they're fascinating. They look terrifying to get into. A giant ice skate. Yeah, they're wild. They had those, the old ones from like 100 years ago, the ones that like, back then.

They had an exhibit up there for the ice yacht. So we went there. And then we went when they did like a, like a revolutionary war reenactment thing they did. I don't know. We were bored and it was something to do. And it's a yacht, huh? They call it an ice yacht. Okay.

That's what it is. It's really cool, though. Look it up. Look up the videos. It's fucking crazy. So Monica gives two stars. All right. What do you got to say for yourself, Monica?

Yeah. I have to be honest. Well, I would hope you would be. Thank you. Don't lie to your stupid opinions. Yeah. General at Newark, New Jersey, there is not serious information. Go there, go there, and nothing. Oh, I wish you would have lied to us.

What are you talking about? What the fuck are you talking about? I wish you were less honest. Yeah, that sounds like, go there, go there. Is it a Hall and Oates song? They're singing? What is that? What is go there? It's got to be something. They lies to us. I mean, that happens. There was an announcement for activity at the museum. When went there, there was nothing.

It was closed. I went to the library. They didn't know about it. Newark, it's a shame. At immigration at the thing, municipal workers are terrible. Unacceptable behave. Police department. It's another issues.

For yes, for I don't know just ignores you. I have to find things by myself. The last. This is the most important. Yeah. I don't think she had fun at the museum. I'm just going to say that. No, it sounds like she needs a tour guide.

She needs something. Jay, one star. I've never been to the museum before and decided to go on a Saturday. There was no parking dedicated for the museum. Well, you're in Newark, so it's not a lot of parking around there. So instead, I spent about 20 minutes driving around trying to find a place to park. Apparently, all the lots nearby, the area, are closed on the weekend. How do you close a parking?

lot because there's nobody there to watch it probably, I would assume. I debated leaving and just going home. I was very tempted. I did end up finding a parking garage and attending the museum. It was lovely and has some really great staff. However, I'm not rushing to come back if I have to navigate that again. All right. Jesus Christ. I love the museum, but they really need to, what, take over the city and tell them you need to give us parking? What the fuck are you talking about? That's crazy. Okay, Darrell, one star. I was part of a venue on December 18th at 6 o'clock.

Part of a what? A venue. I don't know what that means. The museum staff were beautiful, but the organization running the event were bad. Upon leaving the venue, I was sequestered. Listen to this. I was sequestered about stealing a microphone from the venue. That's not called a sequester.

That's called taken in for questioning. An interrogation. Detained. would be a better word for. Sequested. That's great. This was very embarrassing and unprofessional.

Please do not change this review. Please don't edit that you guys fucked with me. We'll leave it alone. Don't worry about it. We'll let your trife out. Did you steal the microphone? Your strife out into the world? We don't know.

There's no resolution to it. Apparently not. Don't change this review, though. Patrick One Star. I've never been to a museum where they wouldn't accept credit. cards or where you would have to have exact change to buy a ticket. That's strange.

Not to mention that they suggest you ask the salesperson at the gift shop to break your $20 bill. So in other words, you're supposed to buy something at the shop and spend more money to be allowed entry. Or maybe they'll just break your bill for you. Right. Yeah. Maybe they just have change and they know that. That's possible.

It looks like a nice museum with an interesting collection and one of the very few options for cultural activities in New Jersey on the whole. Yeah. New Jersey isn't known as a cultural kind of center of culture, not really, unless you consider decent chicken parmesan culture. I do. It's pretty good. I'm sure in the fuck do. Yes, we do.

Nevertheless, completely disorganized. Besides, the surrounding area is very deserted with few people on the streets and most businesses closed on Sunday, which makes you feel uneasy in the neighborhood. I will never go back. I prefer the world-class museums of New York City. well, it's fucking right there. There's a river. It's right across the, yeah, yeah, yeah. You just go ahead and cross it, and then there they are.

There's a shut the fuck up a go to. There's a shitload of bridges that'll get you to it. Go anywhere you want. You can walk there. I bet you a ferry too. As I say, there's pretty little trains it'll take you there. Go right into the water. All sorts of shit for you.

Probably don't have to drive. Just park your ass in a seat. Shit, no. Catherine, one star. This is a wild review. I don't know what this means. The African dining room installation in the Budweiser family home exhibit. What?

was incongruous to the period and frankly ugly. This person went to like art, her major was art history. Yeah, the mudwiser guy house was not accurate. Did not have African dining room in that period. That does sound incongruous, if I'm being honest with you. That might not be a bad review. If you're not using ironclad for contracts, you could be leaving millions on the table without knowing it. Every contract holds renewal dates, pricing terms, and obligations you can't afford to miss.

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Too many monkeys. What? Jimmy's the look. Yeah, no, not what you're thinking. Where are all the birds? There used to be birds. I like birds. Yes.

Now there's, yeah. The look on Jimmy's face was like, oh my God. Somebody went to the wrong place. Someone, either that or. Who's he talking about? You had to look like very perplexed and like what minefield are we walking into. He just wants birds. That's all.

Real monkeys he's talking about. Everything's got, everything's a skeleton here. What the fuck? What's happening? One star didn't really want to go here in the first place. Well, then why'd you go? Why'd you go and the complaint about it? You knew it was going to suck if you didn't want to go there.

Terry, one star. It was a horrible experience. Went on a school trip with my grandson. Never again. Yeah. You chaperoned a bunch of fucking nine-year-olds in an art museum. Sucks. Good Lord.

I'd go in the bathroom and put a gun in my mouth if I had to do that. That sounds awful. Oh, I'll make the bathroom even messier. Let me tell you some. David, one star, I could not find an entrance. No? You're too dumb to find the door and they get one star. You think that the New Jersey Museum of Art is going to hide the entrance?

Yes. You have to scale up top and go in through the roof like Spider-Man. That's how it works. I should do that. They don't watch it in here. You've got to earn it. It's one of those places where you have to follow an Instagram account and get the password. It's, yeah.

You got to get a special knock. Yeah. And then they'll let you in. Yeah. Finally, pants gives one star. Pants. Pants. Yeah.

Fake art. It's the whole of you. Fake art. This is real. No, no, this is real. I don't believe it. Okay. So, we've had some culture.

Yeah. It doesn't suit us. No. It's not our type of thing. So let's go back to being trash, Jimmy. What do you say? You into that? Yeah.

Let's go to the family dollar. In Kansas City, Missouri. What do you say? Fantastic. Let me take a shit in the food court first and let's get out of here. Let's do it. You can take a shit in any aisle you want and a Family Dollar. I don't think they care.

Family Dollar, it is at 1201 East Meyer Boulevard, Kansas City, Missouri. If you don't know what Family Dollar is, my hat's off to you. You've lived a good life. You're doing wonderful. Discount chain carrying a variety of goods, including groceries, household items, and beauty products. Whatever you would use. normally, the cheaper, shittier version of that comes from here. Right.

And they used to, dollar trees and dollar generals, they used to be actual dollar stores. Yes. And 99 cents only used to be. Now everything just ends in dollar. That's all it is. That's all it is. This is $5. This is $2.

This is a dollar. But nothing is, it's not one of those where everything's a fucking dollar anymore. That doesn't exist. Either way, it's shit the target threw out. Right. It's the shit that Target can't sell to their middle-class people. Yeah. So the family dollar rummaged through the Target dumpsters and open up a store.

Yeah, it's all the shit that Big Lots put on wholesale when they close their doors. No shit. So this place has 3.2 stars. It's not doing great. Yeah. Okay. I don't know if we'll get through all these, but we'll be end it next time if we don't. Andrea, five stars.

went today to look for a garden item. What? Hos? At the dollar? A rakely dollar? Seas? Ho? Soil?

What are you looking for? Unfortunately, they were out, and the associate actually asked us if we couldn't find what we were looking for as we were leaving the store. I wish I had gotten her name because it was so nice that she would ask that and actually cared. She was actually to see if you were stealing, probably. Right. She was like, what's the problem? You didn't find anything? Yeah. And if you ran away, if you ran, then she knew that you were thieves. That's all.

Also, we don't call them associates at Dollar Tree. These are just employees. Just employees. Hired hands, we call them, like a farm or a ranch. These are the help. The help. That is bad. Man, I wish more people still did that. God bless and thank you. Okay. Oh, my God. Okay. Catherine, two stars. This location was scary. pot holes, not pot holes, one word pot and W-H-O-L-E-S. POT holes, whole pots. Pot holes. Yeah.

I wish you would have just done it the other way. Pots and holes. There's pot and holes. That's a party. You're going to have a lot of young men frequenting this. Lining up. Yeah. So all of these are just with an exclamation after them.

Pot holes. Trash. Right. Low trees. All caps. Vagrancy. Uh-huh. Not a welcoming store.

But clerks are nice. Right. That's nice. That's good. Clerks, that's what they are. Clerks, that's better. And you just described a dollar, a family dollar. You sure did.

Trash, vagrancy, potholes. Yeah. What do you think? They're going to repave. You paid a dollar 50 for something that a decent version of is $8. Do you think they're going to repave the parking lot for you? Did you ever go to that? Kmart in Phoenix that had like that really rough pavement.

The parking lot is crazy. Like when you, it's that parking lot. What is it? 17 and Bethany home or something? It's just west of. It's kind of, it's a few miles deeper. It's on Bell, I believe. It's that parking lot that's so rough.

Like you look at it and go, oh, I do not want to fall on that. You fall on that. It's a white wound. You know what I mean? It's one of those. It's a cheese grater down there. Yeah. It is still that.

And Kmart's long gone. It looks like somebody just drove a combine on it. Yeah. It's all up before dried. And then we're like, perfect. Still that way. It's been like that for 35 years. They're never fixing it.

If this place is in business, and there's a business there right now that's actually a decent business. And they're still not fixing it. No one's fixing it. So if your parking lot's fucked up, It's not getting fixed. Stop complaining about it. I thought you meant the one down on the 17 that would look like it was from 1968. No, you're that parking lot.

The other one may as well be the exact same way. I know exactly what you're talking about. It's from the 60s. I guarantee it is. My God. The one of the 17 was like one of the last Kmart's to close. Yeah. I hung on.

I remember because we lived by there. And I was like, this place is still open. There'd be like three cars in the parking lot. There's one on 32nd, too, that hung on forever. They ended up doing like a Kmart. I think it was just an appliance center. Like Sears used to do? Yeah.

And then they eventually just were like, obviously. Nobody gives us shit. No one's buying appliances from us. We're not that alive. I think there's one left in the country, though. Jesus Christ. This one Kmart, one blockbuster that should team up together. So Monica, two stars.

They've consistently been out of stock on KCPL energy efficient light bulbs. Yeah. I used to schedule my shopping trips to this convenient location first week of each month. Of course, now why bother? Because they've not had those great value light bulbs in ages. Why are you buying light bulbs every month? Right. That's the only thing you need?

You've got an electrical problem in your house. Yeah, that is not normal. Their laundry and household cleaning supplies are often in low inventory or non-existent. It's so frustrating. Right. You finally get comfortable with a store. and then out of the blue, your friendly neighborhood store goes somewhere taking all of your favorite products. Not literally, but it might as well.

I really like this store. I wish someone needed a managerial position and would turn things around. Right. I wish someone needed a managerial position. That's funny. They could apply here and everything could be better. And if they needed someone in an advisory position that could come weekly to check out the inventory, check orders, and shipments, make sure inventories maintain, stock, etc.

I'd be that person. You could just hire me. Are you lobbying for the position? I think she's lobbying to be general manager of the Dollar Tree. This person could help the manager turn things, everything around in a positive direction. Good luck. That's the friendliest two-star review of all time. She offered to work there, for Christ's sake.

Never heard that before. I can fix all of these two-star reviews. Just hire me. Just hire me. Tony, one star. They are very high in prices. Going to the grocery store now. What?

They're saying the prices have gone up. Might as well just shop at the grocery store. The dollar tree, dollar general family dollar, is too high. Too high. All right. That's too high. Might as well go to the grocery store. Kay gives one star.

This location is the absolute worst I've ever experienced. Oh. I don't see how this place. is even still open. It's horribly messy all the time, all caps, and the manager is unprofessional. She thinks that just because she addresses, I love what it, she thinks that you know that's what it is exactly like that. Let me tell you about this bitch.

She cute. She thinks is replacement for this bitch. Yeah. This bitch. She thinks. Internet politeness. She thinks. She thinks that just because she.

addresses the customers as sweetie, baby, and hun all the time, that makes up for how raggedy they are and how raggedy the store is. You try to be friendly with me with your raggedy ass. And during the winter months, this location was the only one that enforced the discriminating, quote, rule that all customers had to remove hats and hoods in the store. They were more worried about that than making the store a better one. I personally can't wait to see it close. down. I live just a few blocks away, but have started to pass by it to go to a better one further away.

And that's true too. If you go to fucking North Scottsdale, you can wear a goddamn hood or a hat any fucking goddamn place you please, no one would ever tell you to fucking take it on. No, no, no. But if you go to South Phoenix and put a fucking hood on... Oh my God, there are gas stations

where they will tell you leave your bag at the front please. You can't even... In a gas... Three aisles. We don't trust you to not clear a shelf into your back. We can't keep that close of an eye on you from 11 feet away because that's the door. Yeah. Wow.

Oh, that's crazy. The last time I made the mistake of going to this one, I got one item and stood in line for 20 minutes because there wasn't a second cashier. And the manager was checking customers out while holding long conversations with them, calling them hunt and sweetie and being friendly with them. God forbid. That was the last straw. I will not see people pleasantly conversing before me. It will not. I will not take manners.

No. No. And the way the employees stand around the entrance and chain smoke cigarettes is so inconsiderate of the customers who have to breathe in their secondhand smoke on the way in. And when they come out, shut up, you fucking baby. I hate the word chain smoke. Nobody does that. Nobody's lighting a cigarette off of another cigarette. And if they are,

That person probably that one cigarette wasn't enough. They need fucking two because they work at the fucking dollar general. Yeah. If someone works the dollar general, as long as it's outside, I don't care if they got a crack pipe in their hand. I get it. You work at the dollar fucking general. I don't smoke crack too. What you're lighting on fire and inhaling the fumes of.

I hate when people complain about secondhand smoke outdoors. Like you're getting enough to shut the fuck up. There's car exhaust down here. That is way worse than anything there. It's all over the place, you fucking idiots. That drives me crazy. Don't blow it in people's faces, but you can avoid the smoke if you go around it. It's outdoors.

It doesn't hang in a cloud. It goes up toward the sky magically. Fucking dildo. Okay. The employees operate this location like it's their awful, unkempt home. One never knows what a mess and debacle they will see if they venture into this dirty place. Okay. Dude, that makes it sound, now I'm intrigued.

I got to see it. It's just a dollar store, for Christ's sake. Sounds like there's tits in there. I feel like that. Do yourself a favor and skip this location if you can help it. Like I stated, I can't wait until that hole in the wall is closed down. Hole in the wall. Hole in the wall.

A hole in the wall. It's a hole in the wall. It's a dollar store. It's definitely a hole in the wall. So, okay. We will leave it at that. There's a few more. We'll finish them off next week, and then we'll start.

A fresh with some new crazy shit that we'll talk about. But we had some fun today. We ice skating. Yeah, that was a party. Had some ice skating, saw some fine art. It's been a good time all around, I think, here. I like it. We've been trashy at a dollar store.

Excellent shit. So good. So thank you everybody so much for hanging out with us. Head over to shut up and give me murder.com. Get your tickets for the your stupid. Opinions Live show. It is in Phoenix on March 21st at Stand Up Live. Great venue.

They even have good food there. They do. Yeah. The steak bites. There's salads. There's burgers. It's really good. And it's good food.

Yeah. They have good food. It's a nice place. It's back there. Not some shitty little, it's not one of those dingy comedy clubs. It's sticky and all that. It's a classy joint. It's just some nachos and, uh, no.

Poutine or some shit. Yeah. No. Thank fuck. there's no putteen. That one closed down, the Putine one. No more Poutine in Phoenix. Sorry about it. No more Poutine. No more comedy and Poutine at the same time

in Phoenix. It won't happen anymore. As a very inside joke, a comedy club just closed down that was owned by Canadian people and served Poutine, which is a highly desired item at 10 o'clock on a Saturday night in Phoenix. That's what everyone's looking for. So thank you so much for joining

us. Come see us at the virtual live... Can't wait. The regular live show, damn it, in Phoenix. And thank you so much. for being with us. We will see you next week, everybody. See you then. Bye.