Your Transformation Station - 32. Is this a "Game of Self-Domination" Natsune Oki w/ Favazza

Episode Date: October 1, 2020

"How can you create a transformation in others if there's no transformation in yourself?" Join (Greg Favazza podcast) host and creator as he interviews author "Natsune Oki". Behind the scenes, important decisions must be made between self-publishing and traditional print manufacturing. Natsune is the creator of "LifeUpTV" and she goes into her personal story behind the book, The "Game of Self-Domination” Support the showPODCAST INFO:Podcast website: https://ytspod.comApple Podcasts: https://ytspod.com/appleSpotify: https://ytspod.com/spotifyRSS: https://ytspod.com/rssYouTube: https://ytspod.com/youtubeSUPPORT & CONNECT:- Check out the sponsors below, it's the best way to support this podcast- Outgrow: https://www.ytspod.com/outgrow- Quillbot Flow: https://ytspod.com/quilbot - LearnWorlds: https://ytspod.com/learnworlds- Facebook: https://ytspod.com/facebook- Instagram: https://ytspod.com/instagram- TikTok: https://ytspod.com/tiktok- Twitter: https://ytspod.com/x Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to your transformation station. This is your transformation. We're tapping in to surpassing expectations from the most successful people in the modern day and honing in on new foresight, methodologies, and clairvoyance you never knew. This is your transformation station with your host, Greg Favaza. You have to have a definition of success. if I could go back there's not many things that I would go back for

but what do you do when you lose your purpose it's okay to struggle it's okay that you're not okay I am your host Greg Favaza together we will go on a journey this show is all about

surpassing our internal dialogue rediscovering your true identity honing new foresight We have a chance to make the world a better place for our children. Start living in the example today and become your future self tomorrow. If you can leave our viewers with some good advice to follow, what would you let them know? These things that you're afraid to do, go do them. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to your transformation station.

How is everybody doing? I appreciate you all for tuning back in to your transformation station. station. For those that have been a consistent listener, a consistent listener, I appreciate you guys. For those that have just tuned in, and this is your first episode, hit subscribe. You're not going to be disappointed in the information, the resources, the tips, the information products, whatever you want to call it. I will be providing you that as each episode continues on forward. If you like to get in touch with me,

you can get in touch with me through email at Your Transformation Station, correction, Your Transformation podcast at gmail.com. You can also check out our social media platforms. Everything from Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest. It's all ending with YTS, the podcast. To make things simple,

I attached all the links below, so you shouldn't have any trouble finding us. Over the last few weeks, I have been extremely busy in finishing up a lot of work that I've been putting together for your transformation station, and I will be releasing that information soon. Yes, I know. That's a bummer. But you'll be here before we know it. In this week's episode, we have Natsun Oki

all the way from Tokyo Japan, where we go into her book, The Game of Self-Domination. This book is 15 most practical steps to self-mastery and achieving anything you want. That does sound nice right about now. In this experience, we are taking a humanistic path as we look into Natsoon's belief on her assumed truth. I really enjoyed this episode.

And I know you guys can take something away from our conversation. We're tapping in to surpassing expectations from the most successful people in the modern day and honing in a new foresight, methodologies, and clairvoyance you never knew. This is your transformation station. With your host, Greg Fabaza. Welcome to your transformation stage and how you doing? I'm doing good. How are you? I'm doing really good.

So you are in Japan right now? Mm-hmm. I'm in Tokyo. Tokyo, Japan. What's that like over there? I mean, it's okay. Things are getting back to normal. I guess the numbers of coronavirus cases is a little bit increasing right now. Yes. But it's like me going back. I mean, I'm not sorry, it's slowly going back.

Yes. Very good. That's very good. So let's start by looking at your social upbringing as far as when you grew up, what was that like? And how did that affect your writing process? When I, my story about growing up in Japan, I would say I was very different. than people around me. I think looking back, I was always very courageous kid.

I mean, I'm still as. I think this is one of the main characteristics of mine is I'm just very courageous person. And my fear of not being who I was, which is to be courageous person, was bigger than the fear of not fitting in. So even if it meant that, I had to be labeled as a failure in the society where everybody's taught to photo certain roles in Japan, especially this is very strong in Japanese culture, where, you know, if you're outside of this rule, the circle of the role, like you're pretty much freer in the society, right? Like, you're difficult to manage. And that's something that Japan don't like, right? So I suffered a lot for that. And I think it was a lot harder for me as I was in, you know, when I was

younger because, you know, at that time, the society was sending me the message I was getting from the feedback I was getting from the society was basically I was a different and difference equal. You're difficult to be with your failure. Like you're not following this right rule. You should feel ashamed of yourself. So. When you say feedback from the society, who are you referring to exactly? Like, I almost failed.

my high school, for example. And that was one of the reason I was like that was because, you know, I was curious and I was true to myself. I was very authentically authentic to myself. And I never oppressed my curiosity. So I just did everything that I just felt like, ah, I want to do that. I won't try it. And that got me into a lot of troubles. But two bucks to your question, I guess I had to gain my, it was almost like my survival mechanism that I had to gain. you know, right kind of mindset where I shouldn't, I couldn't blame myself for being who I was, right? Like, especially I was very vulnerable to rejections because I was a different kid. Like, I definitely, over time, build this stuff of experience that gave me the strengths

and gave me the right mental framework that bucked me up, like moving forward. my journey. So that gave me the inspiration to write my book because this is like accumulation of what I've done over time being different and being vulnerable to rejections and yeah, risks.

How long did it take you to write your book? It took me, sorry, it's getting the notification. It took me about four months. You know, I decided to write it actually was last December and that was, you know, I wasn't, I had another business at the time. I was like working full time on and I just didn't necessarily treat my book as something

very serious. Sorry, I said December, but it was the time I started was December and actually I started on the project like July, last year or something like that. So, you know, it took me about four months after I fully committed. it to create the book, which was from December to time on. So now it's August, but I pretty much just, I pretty much finished the writing it around, about like four months later from December. Okay.

Awesome. Let's go into it. So what guiding principles can I take away from this reading? Yeah. Well, I included a lot of things, many things to do with. Because I, so I also have a show. It's called Life Up Education TV. And basically the theme of that is I want to talk about possibility of humanity

from the perspective of art and science. And I believe that everything starts with art. Art is a mother of everything. And I think science is just like a one tool, one language of art. but both are powerful subjects of study but that being said I think art everything starts from art

so many things I included is more drawn to create some sort of emotion like more like an art factor that actually creates emotion to encourage people to create action in life and basically I break it down to three different phases

So I talk about how to create mental transformation in life. And I say mental transformation because mental transformation is done by intention, right? Like you decide to make a change and thus mental transformation. But really, this guidebook, you can use it to navigate through any kind of changes because changes happen all the time and the process is exactly the same. Like you have this momentum, you have this change coming and And after that, it's like basically doing everything and anything you can to navigate through the storms and adversities that's going to follow up, right? So I would talk about that from three different phases.

The first phase I talk about how to create momentum and decisiveness, the commitment in life. How can you be committed to create something? That's the beginning of the mental transformation. I talk about you need two things. One is you need inspiration in a sense that anything that you're dreaming of right now is possible to achieve. And that's like the beauty of life. Like the biggest mental block you have. Well, the biggest block you have is your mindset, right?

And a lot of time, this gets to be talked about a lot. But I think people forget to talk about you actually also need to have desperation in life. For example, one other thing I say is that the biggest skill, you can have as a creator in life, as a leader in life, initiator in life, is the ability to be uncomfortable and be practical. So meaning that you need to be able, like, you need to taste desperation, and that's okay. Like you need to taste that like a shortage in something. And that's okay.

It's a scary place to experience, but it's necessary. And then when you are in that extreme state, can you, still move? Can you still be practical? Can you still create action, right? So at one level, like you kind of need to go through the whole, like, you really need to stop being scared of experiencing the desperation and you should, if anything, encourage, I encourage you to embrace that, like, experience as something that makes you momentum, momentum and decisiveness in life. So,

I talk about that and then transitioning to the second phase I talk about the importance of self-awareness because momentum is just the decisiveness which you definitely need this boost but that's just a momentum thing and then you need also

persevere whatever you decide to change and that's the time you quit right so usually well decisiveness creating commitment in life is easier than what people assume. And actually the game starts after you make the commitment, right? Like, how resilient can you be? And this is one of the phrase I use often where I say,

it's never about managing tasks or managing your time. It's always about managing your mind. And, you know, like being resilient can feel very hard, can feel very, like, heavy. But really, that's the time. we have to pay the most attention for because that's the face a lot of people fail, right? So for me, I really needed to, I really wanted to get down the bottom of it. Like, why do people fail?

And I came to the conclusion that it's part of it is the lack of self-awareness. Like when you're so clear about your, well, I use this word of virtue because I, explain what happiness in life, the definition of happiness by borrowing the word from ancient Greek, but also for Aristotle's, where he says happiness is a virtue of the soul. So, you know, we as a human are driven by two different motivations. The first motivation comes from threat, right? And then the second motivation comes from the reward. And we oftentimes see these two words being the opposite side.

positioned at the opposite side of the spectrum. We tend to see threat as this side and then the word as this side, right? Like we tend to look at it like that. But really, in reality, following, once again, the word from Aristotle, it really exists in the same side. And what he meant is that only by overcoming your adversities, you are able to be ultimately happy. You are able to correct ultimate happiness in your life through that

over coming, like through that journey of overcoming adversity. Because only by overcoming your adversities, you're truly able to meet your true potential, full potential and be who you really mean to be. And so why did I, why did I bring this example? Like, why did I bring this, I guess, a visual thing that I said about earlier, where I said threat this here? This is a video, right?

Like, can I just explain? Like, is this creepy? Of course. If that helps you, that's completely okay. I just have a few questions as far as with your writing. Are you prying it on emotion for readers to understand what the intent is of your writing? and also what distinguishes your book from another self-help book that's after readers and nothing more than that? Can you be your first question?

Yes. Let's just talk about your writing process. Is it relating to emotion as far as people to interpret your writing? Well, my writing style, I would say it includes emotional. there's a message, right? There's a message of I really want to encourage people to take action in life. And once again, I don't wish that if 100 people read my book, my positive voice tells me that I want to impact 100 people out of 100 people to act some sort of action, right? And then maybe my negative voice would say, well, nobody's going to make this seriously. but this is one case where I listen to my practical voice

where I know that if, let's say 100 people read my book, maybe five of them will take action. And then 90% of other people, maybe some of them find it disagreeable. Maybe some of them find it some part inspirational. Maybe some people find an inspiration and not take action at all. Like that's my practical voice that talks to me. So basically, the impact of that is, well, sorry, not impacts of that. Basically, sorry, I think I'm a little bit still confused about your question.

No, you're good. What makes your writing different? If I can read your story, what transformation can I take away from your high school experience, not being accepted from society as far as what did you take away from that experience? Right. Well, I basically, I build my story up, not from that one event. I had like events that I didn't mention here. Did I mention everything I, like my background?

No, not yet. Not yet. Okay. Yeah. So, I mean, it's an accumulation of things, right? And honestly, that's something I cannot control. I think this is why I wanted to say, like, there are things that I cannot control, and I'm fully aware of that, and I'm fully, like,

making a piece with that. And I think that's that to do with emotional intelligence, that to do with having high sense of emotional intelligence. And what I want to try to say is that I cannot, like I have zero interested in controlling what people think of me or what people would want to take from me. I mean, that's opposite market. Like I can decide. I can offer what I can offer and I cannot offer what I cannot offer.

And that's not something I can decide. What are you offering for the listeners to take away? Well, to me, once again, my team of life that I live by is the possibility to with humanity. I want to encourage people to see that we're strong, we're powerful, like we're enough, right? Like the narrative of the society is the completely opposite side where we, you know, they're constantly so you're not enough. So I think that creates a lot of scarcity in people's mind and definitely, discourages people from trying new things or trying different things and really makes them soft for failures. It's difficult for them to pick themselves up once they fail. But then in reality,

when you are able to love yourself, that's not like, that's, that shouldn't be the conversation anymore. How did you pick yourself up after when you failed? Because I'm loving, like, I love myself, But not to be cocky or anything like that or egoistic or nothing like that. Like I'm genuinely, my definition of love is basically you're willing. Like if everyone else in this world hates me or thinks that I'm fadier or whatever, I know that I'm going to be there for me. And I'm going to genuinely be there, be very present with me. How did you pick your stuff up after you failed?

Yeah. So because I have this intention. that I love myself no matter what. Like, I genuinely, I'm genuinely able to pick myself up because I know that if no one is around me, I'm going to be there. And I'm going to be, like, next to her, and I'm going to coach her, like, to get back up. And I have a very genuine, massive trust in her.

And I call it as self-love. And I think that's what's lacking. So when people are willing to do the work for themselves, right? That's a genuine willingness. That's a love. That's a self-love. When you have the self-love, failure is not scary anymore because you know that you have yourself when you fail. And, you know, we're not afraid of being ejected or we're not afraid of people judging us as a failure.

We are afraid of our own perception of our self by getting this rejections or feedback from other people. I don't know if I agree with you on that. I mean, agree to disagree, but I think it's we kind of are afraid of the unknown. And as far as the perception of what others see us as, we don't really know what we want. We kind of just go through life going along with the flow. And through experience and trials and errors and interaction and communication with other people, we compartmentalize and take what we can to help understand our own lives. Your main focus that you taken everything away is from art.

Can we go back to that? What inspired you as far as art goes to appreciate art? Well, when I say art, it really meant that emotion. Okay. Like I'm, like I said, I think, I mean, it's not I think, but, you know, the mindset is very powerful. I think it really comes down to managing your mind once again. Like the practical techniques you can employ.

Like you can, I think it's the problem of resourcefulness, right? Like for me, being resourcefulness is number one criteria. Like you can make things happen if you are resourceful enough. So that's what I was referring to when I said art. Yeah, so basically my hope is that I really want to learn what makes people resourceful. The impact you want to have on a reader who takes away your reading would be what? Well, my book talks a lot about resilience. And I tell people how we can change our narrative around failures,

even success, how can we change our narrative around success? How can we change our definition about success so that we're not, like, I can make you to look at life a much more macro view instead of like a micro view, which is like what's very obvious to us that people get blinded by the microbeview. So I think the biggest thing I can talk about with my book is I can show you how to change a negative and the story around or how you interpretate failure and success even so that you can keep your perseverance around anything you want to achieve. So how do you own your rejections and failures then? So I think this is once again comes back to my earlier point where I. say that emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence is very important, right?

And if good thing happened to you, if bad thing happened to you, nothing is ever about you. Nothing is about you. And I think we tend to forget that. But in reality, things are just how it is. And you don't necessarily have to attach meaning to it. It's just your thinker who's doing that touching meaning. Therefore, you're interpreting the reality. in a certain way, but in reality, in the actual reality, there's nothing happening.

Like, the things are just happening, and that's just how it is. What takeaways did you get from your readers, comments from them or anything? Yeah. Recently. The book is coming. Well, the book is announcing on August 27th. But so far, some feedback I got from either my editors or my tested leaders was actually pretty positive.

So there was one chapter where I talk about like a method of how someone can execute their, I guess, like, this is a chapter where I talk about like actual life strategy that you can use to execute your plan, effectiveness and efficiently. And I did broke this like a scoring system that you can use to organize your day tasks. Can we go into that? Yeah, but it's kind of like complicated matrix that you kind of have to like read the whole thing. But basically I took different inspiration from five different concepts. One comes from Italian engineer. Next one comes from British economists. The third one comes from McKinsey, Misi principal, which is strategy, communication strategy that they use to organize their way of communicating to clients and, you know, just

between the colleagues and then to be effective. And then the fourth one comes from Toyota, the Japanese automotive manufacturer company. And then the fifth one comes from the 34th U.S. Press then the matrix he was using to organize his daily tasks. And basically I developed this, once again, the scoring system that people can use based on these five concepts. That's going to help you be very organized about

about your priority and about the return you can get from something. And basically, why did I want to talk about this? Because these five concepts really helped me to be very effective in the way I communicate with internally and also externally. And I think organization is very, very important skill you should have. Definitely agree. So, you know, lack of focus, for example, can be created when you're confused about. what you want or when you're confused about

your priority. So being organized is very important. And I think I basically wanted to make that point instead of bringing up these five different concepts. Awesome. So before we wrap things up and get you on your way, what can you leave our listeners with some good advice to follow and some bad advice to avoid?

I think, well, see, this is me, like personally, I don't believe that my truth is my truth and someone else's truth is someone else's truth. So I'm not here to convince someone to think about me in a certain way. But I think that if I want to make influence, I need to live on my truth. And maybe some people find it inspirational, some people don't. And I'm completely okay with that.

that, right? Like, that's being highly, like, emotionally intelligent, just being like very, like, having the integrity of who you are, like being okay with who you are, right? And to me, with that concept,

like, I'm just going to do what I do. And maybe some people find it inspirational. So if that's the case, like, that's amazing. But basically, to your point, I don't necessarily try to tell someone, something is true to me, therefore it's going to be truth for you.

But another, I have a broach where I say, well, this is true to me. So I live in it. And by living in it, maybe it will inspire you. Maybe it'll cultivate your own growth by basically displaying the way of my living. But the lesson itself is up to you. Like you can take whatever the way you want to take it from. So basically that's where I stand in terms of giving out advice, which is I'm just going to dead me.

I'm going to give my truth. I'm going to tell you my truth. And then it's up to you how you interpret it. And I'm completely okay with that. And then I guess the bad advice, I think it comes to the same thing, right? But really finding your own truth has been most helpful thing for me. and I believe that people should find their own truth as well. Excellent.

And what's an action item our listeners can start implementing today to start being better and gain self-awareness? I think the very fundamental thing, the very first step, is to know what you want, really. I mean, that's the only way you will be resourceful. That's the only way you can gain perseverance. So without knowing who you really are, what you are about, what you want, I think it's very hard to just tell you you should do this and this.

And then you do it forever, right? Like it really has to come from inside. You need to find what it is that you want and be very true to that. And then when you don't have any conflict, like internal conflicts of, you know, this is what should do this is what I should have versus this is what I really want when there's no gap you can naturally just align your habits your neutral toward the direction you want to be glowing to that makes sense so I think the best thing I can think about is to really get to know yourself first so before I tell you you know action list that's the

first thing you need to do. Okay. How can our listeners get in touch with you? Yeah. My show is available under life-upeducationTV.com. My website is like-upeducationtiv.com. I have a social media on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, TikTok, LinkedIn, and yeah, I'll say YouTube. You can find me under life-upeducation TV.com across all platforms. I would say that life-up education. TV, sorry. And my book is The Game of Self-Domination. It's available on my website. Awesome. Well, thank you so much, Natsoon. I really do appreciate your time. Yeah. Thank you very much for having me. You've been listening to Your Transformation Station. Rediscovering your true identity and purpose on this planet.

We hope you enjoyed the show. And we hope you've gotten some useful and practical information. Join us weekly on Monday for the YTS Challenge. Bye-weekly on Wednesday for the exclusive interviews at 8 p.m. Central Time. In the meantime, connect with us on Facebook and Instagram at YTS The Podcast. We'll be back soon. Until then, this is your transformation station, signing off. It's tax season, and at LifeLock, we know you're tired of numbers. But here's a big one you need to hear.

Billions. That's the amount of money and refunds the IRS has flagged for possible identity fraud. Now here's another big number. 100 million. That's how many data points LifeLock monitors every second. If your identity is stolen, we'll fix it guaranteed. One last big number. Save up to 40% your first year.

Visit lifelock.com slash podcast for the threats you can't control. Terms apply.