Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - 1 Hour To Start Your Day Right | WAKE UP POSITIVE | Morning Motivation

Episode Date: January 13, 2023

"Lose an hour in the morning, and you will spend all day looking for it." - Richard Whately

If there's time, then there's time to turn things around. If there is a tomorrow, then there is hope today. The only half-to-bees in life are the ones we prop up and adhere to. And how interesting that oftentimes we don't even realize we're the ones holding them up. There's a simple question that I like to ask as the sun comes up in the college. coffee bruise, am I living today like it's an obligation or something more? Is it an automatic continuation of the past or a methodical move towards a future that lights me up? And these aren't small distinctions, right? I've lived both ways. I've felt what it's like to feel both.

I remember going to work and joking around that a flat tire would be a real treat. That's not accountability. That's not control. That's essentially living life as a jellyfish floating along with the tide. And while the lack of required output, innovation, and planning may have felt like a win in the moment. Or a burden lifted off my shoulders at the time. Deprived me of that which resides in the soul of every human being a lot. Purpose. Personal agency.

See, you can only go so far, so long being the spectator of your own journey. You can only go so long looking out the window before you wonder just what it'd be like to be behind the wheel. When we put our actions up against the question why, it astounds me how many things are done because it's what we've always done. We act like we're expected to act. Think like we're expected to think, see who we're expected to see, but expected by whom? Some of my greatest breakthroughs in life emerged after being asked, why? by people I look up to or respect.

Why have you accepted that? That's your income? Okay, great, but why? That's how you spend your day? I see how calm. And when one is tasked with looking at their own life through a magnifying glass, some hidden truths always emerge.

It shines a spotlight in the corner of the room, illuminating those shadows where one can, if they look hard enough, make out the wolf in sheep's clothing that is the phrase, because that's how I've always done it. We get in life what we accept. We are what we allow ourselves to be, and if we don't ask ourselves which mountain is worth climbing, which ocean is worth crossing,

we simply float. with the tides. We're at the mercy of the winds. We forfeit the mastery over our own lives that awaits if we're willing to take that wheel and navigate. So here are a few things to take with you. First is you are bound by nothing. The parameters you exist between are of your making.

You can get in that car and drive. You can walk away and begin something new. You can entertain that vision that's been conveniently tucked away in the back of your mind. Understand that to not go is fine, but it's a decision. And perhaps a decision you'll wish you made differently. And second, difficult today liberate you tomorrow. It's easier to observe. It's easier to say how you wish things were. After all, stepping out into the fast-paced chaotic world is tough. It's scary, it's unpredictable, but it's where you find yourself and the path that's calling your name. It's beyond the pins and needles emerging as one jumps into the cold water, that they're able to

find that evolution. If there's time, then there's time to turn things around. If there is a tomorrow, then there is hope. Normality is a paved road. It's comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow. Vincent Van Gogh. What is normality? Well, according to the dictionary, normal is the usual average or typical state or condition.

Common. Normal is also a decision. There's a quote by Robin Sharma. And I've looked to this for years. It states, if you want what the 5% have, you need to be willing to do what only the 5% are willing to do. What they obtain is not, definitionally speaking, normal. It's uncommon.

And what they do to arrive at that outcome is also uncommon. They play by a different set of rules, and in doing so end up with an entirely different outcome than most. To put it simply, we arrive at normal when our effort level is normal. You put in normal hours or give average effort at work. Most likely your results, career progress, compensation will be normal. You pay moderate attention to your fitness, your health. Well, your level of physical fitness will be normal.

You dedicate typical levels of effort to your relationships, your relationships will be normal. Not terrible, but not remarkable. I'm sure you get the idea here, the pattern. Generally, over time, what we get starts to reflect what we gave. And here's where the self-assessment comes in, the awareness. You have to ask yourself in pursuit of something greater whether your actions are aligning with your goals and objectives.

There's nothing so futile is telling yourself you're going to achieve miraculous larger than life outcomes and then putting in average typical normal effort If normal goes in normal comes out And as I was thinking about this recently

as it pertains to my life I had a little epiphany Right so fitness is a big area of focus for me I run or do some type of strength training six days a week. As far as I can tell, that level of effort is beyond normal. I go above and beyond in that area of my life. But even though I'm aligned on my mission to be the 5% there, I realized there was a gap.

I realized my diet was very normal. Completely unextorinary. It's just easy to convince yourself to eat whatever you want after a really long run, right? Why not pizza? After all, it's the normal thing to do. But I had to remind myself that what I wanted in that area of my life, holistically, is not normal. Therefore, the inputs cannot be normal.

It was time to start standing up to those things that are very easy to say yes to, to rationalize. And that's the idea here. I pick my 5% categories where I truly want to excel and make sure there's nothing normal about their development. You want top tier results, you have to give top tier effort. Make the sacrifices, map out the path. I've come to see this differently over the years. It's not an indictment against you as a person for choosing normal. But know that it is indicative of a choice, and the output eventually comes to align with the input.

All the actions or lack thereof stack up to resemble something. It's up to you to decide what that is. And so the next question, perhaps somewhat of an obvious one, is when it comes to the things that matter most to you, Why stay confined to normal? It's the above and beyond. The peak experiences, the times we overcame, fought and won, took the risk and came out on top.

That's when we are at our best. That's when we get the most from life. So is normal the end of the world? No. It's just that, Abnormal is the beginning of one. When our backs are against the wall, we're forced to become more. When the clock is ticking, we are tasked with finding answers that hide among us.

It's in the darkness, we find light, and while lost we find ourselves. The paradox of life is that from our pain comes our purpose, our evolution, and our greatness. I love thinking back to about 2014, making my way around Boston, having just quit my job, essentially purposeless, clinging to a YouTube channel and a podcast idea that I would name your world within. And why? Why do I think back? Why does this mean everything to me?

Well, because at the time, I knew nothing. I understood nothing Nothing about speaking or media Audio video Nothing about running a business But more importantly I knew very little about life And what's truly required to progress in a world With infinite moving parts

I didn't know that my lack of understanding Is what made everything feel overwhelming And complex and that it was up to me to simplify. I didn't know the extent to which I'd have to befriend failure. And that was the most eye-opening realization. Because when you gravitate towards a risk-free existence and you box yourself in as I had for so long,

of course you don't get the upside, but you also don't fail as dramatically either. Life was a simple game of cause and effect. Do work, get result. not much room for more than that. And so stepping outside that box in the way that I did, change some rules. I learned some things.

First, you can spend time on something. You can exhaust energy on something and get nothing in the short term for your efforts. And I mean nothing, unless you count getting your pride stomped on, Unless you count your friends disappearing when you need them most, unless you count self-doubt in a constant worry about not amounting to anything. I mean, these are very raw, very real human emotions.

They tend to arise when we start something new, but in them is also the power. This is where the light bulb turns on and the path emerges. It's where I learn that we only get what we want when we endure or what we don't. And what a foreign concept when you think about it, right? It's like, Eddie, take this mic, go stand in front of this audience and pour your heart out. Your knees are shaking, chest is pounding, but dude, trust me, it'll be good for you. And funny enough, it was.

It was because the fear in my stomach became the indicator that something not. something exciting, something more was around the corner. Like Pavlov's dog hearing that bell, any time the fear kicked in, I could feel myself getting closer to something meaningful, to a higher version of myself. The pain is an invite, the sheer terror. And let's face it, that's what it feels like sometimes.

It's an upgrade. Disguised is the monster that you think you should be running from. When it is, as I recently mentioned, the adversary you should befriend. We have to change our relationship with discomfort, because our initial understanding, the one that comes stock in our minds, is never sufficient to build anything of significance. Its default setting is to preserve the now,

not expanded. And so just like those stock speakers that came in my 1999, Ford F-150 when I was in my early 20s, let's rip it out. Let's customize. Let's upgrade the quality of the sound we hear and the things we say to ourselves. What an advantage it is to know that the hard things

are what make us level up. to find that awareness. What a blessing that when life's difficulty startles and scatters the masses, you could be the one that remains. Standing tall, seeking out the advantage amidst the commotion, every little act of courage becomes more and more meaningful, powerful. But we must lose ourselves to find ourselves. We must embrace our fears if we are to become courageous.

We must fail in order to succeed. And sure, sometimes the price seems steep. But I promise not going costs more. Wishing costs more. If only's cost more. So maybe for you it isn't a YouTube channel or a speaking career. Maybe it's something totally different. something totally different.

But it is something. And should you bring yourself to pursue that which your heart pulls you to pursue, you'll have those moments of defeat. Where you're mad at yourself for leaving the comfort and safety of your previous world. You'll have times where you have no idea what to do,

where you feel alone or stuck or unsure. The difference will be be whether you see this as the invite you've been waiting for or the reason to turn around and settle for less. That's the question. How do you internalize all that emotion that will feel like it is consuming you? I couldn't believe how strong that temptation was to go back, nagging at me every day. Just come off the edge.

Just be comfortable again. But as my old coach would say in college, when we're doing wall sits or something physically taxing, 15 seconds. You can do anything for 15 seconds. And isn't life just a culmination of 15 second windows? It's compartmentalizing the process. It's turning the difficult into the advantageous.

You have the ability to not think like everyone else. You have it within you to rewire your previous conceptions of the world, to see darkness not as your reason to hide from conjured up monsters, but as your invitation to become the light. Remember that the best way to be more is to have the courage to put your back against the wall. And you won't want to in the moment. There will never be a perfect time. But committing to that vulnerability will relate.

least from within you the power, the strength, the greatness that has been for so long tucked away. By moving into the chaos, you are simultaneously creating the calm you always dreamed of. You're realizing the possibility that just needed the door left ajar to make its way into your world. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year, your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master aesthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories, skincare, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2025 with confidence. Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products or building one from scratch,

Dime makes it easy. The work system, our all-in-one best-selling routine, includes a cleanse, of your choice, toner, serums, and moisturizers, taking the guesswork out of skin care for your healthiest, happiest skin yet. Dime's commitment to clean ingredients and sustainable packaging ensures every product is as gentle on your skin as it is on the planet. With thousands of glowing five-star reviews and a loyal community, the results speak for themselves. Revive your skin and give yourself the routine refresh you deserve by visiting dimebeautyco.com. That's Steinbeautyco.com. Your best skin awaits.

To life's adversity, thank you. To the challenges, the ones I hated in the moment, I am beyond grateful. They became invaluable. Those moments that forced me to be more than I was. Step out before I was ready so that I could arm my sense. for the path that was meant for me. Thank you to those times I was afraid. You taught me that the darkness is never as bad as our thoughts make them out to be. And when we learn to trust ourselves, we realize that fear becomes strength.

Thank you to those times I fell short of expectations, the times I didn't quite hit the mark. You taught me that it's not about me. It's not personal. It's about taking that awareness and going at it again more intelligently. Thank you to the times I felt alone. The times I didn't get the support I hoped for or anticipated. You did two things. Reinforce the value of an effective, committed team,

but you also emphasize that if that candle's going to stay low, lit, it's going to be because I commit to keeping it lit. And when tempted to point out and blame the external world, I must pause, reassess, and focus on the world within. Thank you to those times of stagnation, the valleys of despair, of uncertainty. You reminded me that momentum has to be manufactured. And the answers we need are never big or complex. They are small and they are simple.

We are always one step away from getting back on track. Thank you to the unexpected setbacks, the from out of nowhere obstacles. You taught me that the trials and the tribulations, they are not the exception, they are the rule. That success isn't running from them but learning to deal with them. I was just saying that life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it. Thanks for showing me to allocate my energy to the reaction. Thanks for the times I looked around and couldn't find a conceivable way. The times things seemed helpless and hopeless.

You taught me that even in our darkest moments there is an answer that I am capable, I am strong enough. And who would have thought that all these things, all these situations I would have loved to run away from were a gift more valuable than any other? Who would have thought that predictability and comfort were wolves in sheep's clothing? That danger is never the obstacle. It's in thinking you've been slighted by life when the obstacle arrives. In reality, every setback is a chance to be more, to step into that future. yourself to live life. It is from our struggle that we acquire our strength, from our pain we find

just how far we can go. So to these challenges that made me who I am, thank you for the insight, the lessons, and the evolution. Thank you for showing me what no success could ever have shown. Stop apologizing. Stop apologizing for who you are, what you believe and how you see the world. Stop apologizing for your failures. They lift you up. They push you to be more. Stop apologizing for being different, unusual or unique.

There's just saying that if you are lucky enough to be different, don't ever change, embrace. that. Hold it. Stop apologizing for taking a path less traveled for breaking away from the pack. It's not an insufficiency. It doesn't mean you couldn't go their way. It means you had the courage to be yourself in a world trying to make you someone else. Stop apologizing for words that don't align with someone else's ideology or worldview. Your job isn't to a key, or conform, is to grab hold of what lights a fire in you and use it to brighten the world around you. Stop apologizing for your dreams.

It's okay to not be content where you are. It's okay to want to grow, to become more. The roots planting them to the ground, they are not yours. And why waste the opportunity beyond the purpose? horizon of your current existence. See, having the courage of your convictions is like unlocking your mind. Realizing that, yeah, you have the key and you've had it all along. No one else gets to set your parameters.

They don't get to tell you what's right or what to believe. The people around you are not moral arbiters. They're not protectors of truth. Remember that. Remember that no one knows better than you. what's best for you. That's why there's power and intuition in following your beliefs, your strengths,

in doing what makes you happy, relentlessly pursuing what makes you feel alive. The thing about dreams, ideas, potential, they're always meaningless until they're not. See, everything is crazy until it exists. So protect it. Don't bow down to pressures of now Simply because you have not yet built tomorrow

You will If you want it, you will Some messages they are incredibly simple And this, my friends, is one of those You have everything you need To become who you want to be Right now, as you listen to this in real time You don't need approval or permission or acceptance

You don't need to belong or be told it's normal. You simply need to start to know that you will pick yourself up when you fall and keep going. Not apologize, but continue placing one foot in front of the other. Not look externally for a will to carry on that only exists within you. See, the second you begin rewriting the rules, changing the game, you put yourself in position to emerge.

There's a quote that states, life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. Which means that your reaction is drastically more important than the circumstance. And that's critical to know. It's critical to understand that nothing. No one in life has more power over your own situation than you. And there's an old story that hits on this point, exactly. There's a father and a daughter. And basically the daughter's complaining.

She's complaining about life, how difficult things are. She's just know how she's going to make it in whatever it is she's doing. I mean, the bottom line is she's tired of the day to day, right? And her father gets this idea. He says, come with me into the kitchen. And he gets three pots of water, puts them on the stove and turns the burner zone. As soon as they start boiling, he drops a potato in the first one, an egg in the second one, and some coffee beans in the third one.

And after some time goes by and they boil a little bit, he pulls them out, right? He puts the potato in a bowl, he puts the egg in a bowl, and he takes a ladle, and he puts some of the coffee in a cup. And he says, what do you see? She says, well, I see a potato. I see eggs, and I see coffee. He says, yeah, but look closer. There's more there. And she goes and she touches the potato and it's now soft.

And he hands her the bowl with the boiled egg. And she takes the shell off and breaks it open. She sees that it's hard inside. Then finally he asked her to take a sip of the coffee and, you know, she smells it. She takes a sip and a smile comes to her face. She says, so what does all this mean? What are you trying to say? And he says, well, the potato, when I dropped it in the water, it was rigid, it was tough, it was uncompromising.

But in the boiling water, it became soft, weak. Then you have the egg that was basically the opposite. This delicate layer protecting a liquid center and the boiling water made it hard. And then there was the coffee. That wasn't just changed by the situation. It created something new. It took the same adversity and used it as a lever

to bring something beautiful into existence. He then looks at his daughter and says, look, when things become challenging, when things become difficult, which one are you? What's your approach? See, maybe the question is not about how challenging this situation is, right?

Maybe we've been asking the wrong question. Maybe it's how do you transform yourself and by default the world around you? How do you take your strengths, your values, your loves, your joys, your happiness? And let that lead you into something bigger. When life gets hard and it does, what do you become? I always remind myself, you know, we are not defined. by life at peak state. As much as I wish that were the case, right?

We're not shaped by the easy days. Or the times that we floated by. Because those times are great, they're enjoyable, but they're not what make or break us. It's the times that challenge us and ask us to be what we have not yet become. That's the good stuff. And this is another one of those simple but not easy

type things because on paper it makes sense. It's understood. But it's an outlook that manifests over time. It's slowly stacked piece by piece and brick by brick, realizing that every situation provides you with tools to make something out of an apparent nothing. And then it waits. Because fate is in your hands.

And I can certainly think of times in my life. That's one of the reasons I love these stories. I can reflect where each one of those pots of boiling water was relevant. I can think of times I was too headstrong, like the metaphorical potato. I thought success would be easy. I thought projects would be simple to execute. I spent months doing things that just weren't good because I didn't ask what is the world need. I asked myself, what do I want to give the world?

And there has to be a marriage there, right? And it was a quick reminder that the world owes me nothing. I was humbled or softened as the story goes. I've been the egg, I've been timid, I've been uncertain, thin-skinned, worrying about what people would say or the content I was creating, worried about perception. How would things look if I failed? And very quickly, I learned that when life is a game of comparison

or one-upmanship, when you do things for reasons and people, other than yourself, can't win. You overcompensate. You do things for the wrong reasons, and you lose yourself, you become hardened. And then there's the good stuff, right? Getting to the coffee,

not bowing down to the circumstances, but shaping them. Not letting life dictate how the story goes or the fate of your character. And what's interesting is I'm pretty sure that being that metaphorical egg and the potato, they lay the foundation to become

the coffee, the life lessons, the falling down, the picking my ego up off the floor, learning to trust myself, not be led by the opinions and expectations of others. You essentially learn that you can take

the world around you and change it, that it is malleable, it is flexible. You have that power. You have that power. You have that ability, it's up to you to believe it. And that's critical because no one comes along and cosigns that understanding for you. It's an internal process.

You start to learn that things aren't there to provide instruction. They're there to propel you. But can you see the unknown is the opportunity, the obstacle is the way, and the loss is the armor that you pick up during the journey? And so, you know, all of these words essentially come to one point. And that point is you have so much more control over your life than you think you do. As I've said before, you are stronger than you think you are. You are more resilient than you can even imagine.

And when life tests you, and again, it will remember. Remember that the challenges are not happening to you, but for you. The world isn't taking away what you have. It's giving you what you need. So long as you're willing to adapt with it, to grow, expand out, because you not only have the ability to change yourself, but the world as well. Came across a quote recently that said the road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. I thought this demonstrated or captured a realization that's pretty hard to articulate.

And that is just how tempting it is to rationalize stopping or discontinuing your journey when life gets tough. How much sense it always makes to want to call it quits when things get uncomfortable. It's like it's not just that doing something. valuable is hard. It's that it's hard and every three feet there's an invitation to not have to do it anymore. There's an endless supply of exit signs and escape routes. Therefore, accomplishing a goal is simultaneously saying yes to the challenging things while also saying no to the comfortable things. It's fighting off two demons at once. The good news, though, It's that you were made to do just that.

You just have to change the way you internalize the process. You have to change what you see along the way. I talk a lot about perfection as the enemy. And that's something I wholeheartedly believe to be true. But I generally talk about it in the context of perfection, keeping us from starting. Right? I try and unveil perfection as this defense mechanism.

that it truly is. Oh, things aren't perfect, I'll wait. Things aren't exactly where I want them to be. Then I won't go. Emphasizing that it's in going that perfection is crafted, like a statue being chiseled from stone. You fall, you get back up and find that in doing so, you end up with a little more clarity than you had when you start.

You let the trials and tribulations of the journey refine. the product. And so that's the beginning, right? That's finding the courage to start, removing the idea of perfect when really it's just our fears masked. But what about when you've already started? What about when you're underway? When you're in the midst of those trials and tribulations? Because we all know this. When you're in pain, your body wants one thing to remove yourself from the pain. When things are uncomfortable, your default is to seek out those aforementioned parking spaces. Reprieve from the grasp of the unknown.

Things aren't perfect, then I'm done here. Things feel awkward or uncomfortable or unclear, then why bother? What I want to do right now is make the argument that it's most important to continue forward when we're in these moments. It's most critical to move forward when the road is unclear and those tempting parking spaces start revealing themselves.

Things are not perfect, maybe even far from perfect. And this is right about the time when we forget why we started. I've run into this in my past, right? Particularly with injuries. There was a period in my not too distant past when my ankle and shoulder were simultaneously messed up, right?

So couldn't run, couldn't really do any upper body work. My physical activity really took a dive. Right, so I'm a little discouraged. And sure enough, I found the eat whatever you want parking space. It's like, who cares? You're not working out. What's the point? Just focus on the business.

Put a pause on all that stuff. And then eating whatever I wanted became, well, what's the point of getting up at five when I could just get up at seven? I sleep two hours longer is how I rationalize it. It's not like I'm going to be running. And then there goes some very important alone time, thinking time, and you can see how easily the wheels sort of fall off the wagon. Not because you're a bad person or don't want the result, but because the second thing stopped being perfect or working the way I wanted them to, I found a parking space. There will be few stretches of time in life

when everything's perfect. Things going exactly how you want them to. It will simply be the exception, not the rule. And then the question becomes, can you put your head down and continue forward knowing that life will call for adaptation and adjustment? But that those tempting, Exit signs are not for you.

They are weakness. They are for those who forget their strength and their courage. I mentioned a little while ago that growth is fighting two demons, saying yes to the mountain ahead and no to the off-ramps. But when you step back and look at things different, you change the dynamic. You put the odds in your favor. When the off-ramps become reminders of your strength. as you pass them one by one,

indicators of your commitment to move forward. And when the mountain ahead becomes merely the way, not some giant sacrifice or monster, but merely a path, things simplify in a way that empowers you on your mission. There is no perfect or imperfect. There is adjusting when necessary and taking the next little step along the way.

And using the previous example, it's like, I'm injured, okay, this will definitely be a time for adjustment. Maybe it's yoga, stretching, practicing, being more patient, maybe greater emphasis on meditation, mental strength, whatever it is, but we don't stop. We continue stepping forward. The next step will look a little different, but that's all. If perfect is a standard one seeking to maintain, they'll always be pulling over, they'll always be backing off because very rarely do we have stretches of perfection. Life is an adjustment game, not a perfection game. Life asks, what can you do when your hands are tied behind your back?

What can you do when you're tired? What can you do when you've just endured loss, when your pride hurts, your plans fail? And trust me, that's when you see all those off ramps. That's when something in the back of your mind says, hey, all this goes away if you just throw in the towel. Just go seek perfection somewhere else. You'll find it there. But you can chase that rabbit down a million paths.

There is no perfection waiting for you and there is no flawless pursuit. Life comes down to what will you do now? Where you are with what you have, can you find a way to win when it hurts? Look, we all need to understand that life is innately difficult. And success calls for a simplification that is adapting and stepping forward. That's all. Things are hard, you step. Things don't go as you planned, you adapt, You adapt and you step, but you are always moving towards that North Star.

Whatever it is for you, it's deeming those parking spaces insignificant with regard to your life and your journey. Quitting is not brought about by the external world. No failure is a decision. Failure is saying, you know what, this costs more effort than I'm willing to pay. Those parking spaces have become more tempting than the top of this mountain. Failure is a choice. And so, for one to succeed, they must simply stay in motion. Choose adaptation over a self-imposed end.

Yeah, enjoy those moments of perfection, the times the stars do align. But see them as the exception, not the rule. defined when things are great. We are defined by our ability to pick up the pieces and keep moving forward when they're not. Our lives are shaped by the exits. We don't take the parking spaces. We don't even notice as we ascend the mountain that is light.

Because anything other than the road ahead was never an option. You didn't succeed because things were perfect. You succeeded because you found a way to win when they weren't. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year? Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master aesthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories, skin care, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2025 with confidence.

Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products, or building one from scratch. Dime makes it easy. The work system, our all-in-one best-selling routine, includes a cleanser of your choice, toner, serums, and moisturizers, taking the guesswork out of skin care for your healthiest, happiest skin yet. Dime's commitment to clean ingredients and sustainable packaging ensures every product is as gentle on your skin as it is on the planet.

With thousands of glowing five-star reviews and a loyal community, the results speak for themselves. Revive your skin and give yourself the routine refurb. fresh you deserve by visiting dimebeautyco.com. That's dimebeautyco.com. Your best skin awaits. Standing on that ledge, staring out at what we know we need to do, at the moment we least want to do it, well, that's where the future is shaped. When procrastination feels like the answer or avoidance the optimal choice, where does one draw their strength? They say routine is a powerful tool in this fight. And I believe that when something becomes habit or part of the process instilled in the day-to-day, there's just simply less room for negotiation.

We show up with our eyes on the prize. But here's the thing, we are human. There's simply going to be days when the world pushes back. Life is a game of complexity. It's unpredictable. You want to talk about the good days, fine. It's easy to show up when we're feeling good. And thankfully, those days outnumber the others, right?

Creating the bulk of our consistency, 10,000 hours. But not all of them. Life is about momentum. Myself, after coming off a pretty terrible weekend for a variety of reasons, I found myself on that ledge again. When the alternative route made itself known, where it felt mighty tempting to call it off, take a break where my worldview had come into question,

I had to ask myself, who are you? Really? It's easy to rationalize walking away in these moments. In his book The War of Art, Stephen Presfield says, our job in life is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it. Well, who would have known how much goes into that process of becoming?

How committed we have to be to the road before us, and not only when it's sunny, but when the skies are dark and gray. and how if we allow ourselves in those difficult moments to say, sometimes it's okay to wave the white flag, it's okay to walk away, then you leave the door cracked to make that same decision at any other point in time. Quitting, conceding can very easily become a habit and a habit we want to avoid at all cost.

Right, I have this little rule that no matter what, I can never leave dishes in the sink overnight. Never. I treat this, you know, arbitrary little promise to myself, like it's life or death. Which, again, random, but hear me out, it's half practical, half symbolic. I know that if I say, okay, just this once, I've effectively removed the barrier separating order from chaos. If it's okay just this once, then it's okay 1,000 times. And a messy sink becomes a messy kitchen, becomes a messy house, becomes a cluttered mind. Extreme, maybe.

But critical, right? Here is where the symbolism comes in. I understand how fragile that divide. How when I'm tired or have a headache or I'm busy, it's still priority. because I want to hammer my subconscious with the understanding that I show up when it's inconvenient. That very moment when, you know, I could easily trick myself into thinking it's small or dumb or arbitrary. It's a sink, who cares? Right.

That's the moment that I need to bleed into the rest of my life. And I think that's exactly it, right? The floodwaters are always looking to come in. And how many cracks until the room gives way? You know, when you've had a few rough days, when you've lost something important to you, when you're sad or disappointed about an outcome, what then? When life calls you to exceed expectations, what then? Because the world around you will always give you evidence to support dialing it back,

right, selling yourself short if that's the case you're looking to make. But here's the deal. Should you choose the inverse, you are strong enough to be best. better than you've ever been in those challenging moments. You can show up when it hurts. You can reestablish your why and carry forward even after the turbulence of yesterday. Life will never be easy. It will never all make sense.

And this understanding has helped me to roll up my sleeves and continue forward when I'm disappointed with yesterday or overwhelmed by the the conditions or landscape of the moment when I question how much I have left. But I've found that when I look hard enough, there's always something to draw on. And that's the message of note. That's what we must show ourselves. When you're on that ledge, this can be where you're at your best. This is where you get to uncover just how deep-rooted.

Your greatness is. This is where you set the standard and the pace for everything to come. I made it part of my morning routine to go outside, have a cup of coffee, and listen to this app that gives you basically 15-minute summaries of books. It kind of randomizes it for me. And this morning, the one that came on was called How to Talk to Anyone. And there was a part that really stuck out to me, talked about being methodical about who you interact with, particularly in a social setting. The idea being that you don't need to be some type of polished politician to be able to navigate a party or work a room.

And it goes into planning, the idea like eating before the gathering or parties. So while you're there, you can focus on connecting with the people you want to connect with, getting the people. getting the most out of your time there. That type of thing. Makes sense. But the line or the way it was summed up that really got me was in that situation, be the chooser, not the choice. Pretty powerful framing there, right?

Think about how often when we don't ask ourselves what an ideal ending is, what we want, and we simply show up and go with the flow, we're actually forfeiting our ability to shape the outcome of the evening. It's instead going to be shaped by the people who do have a preference and act accordingly. In other words, we're willingly signing up to be a part of their plan. We're signing on to be the choice and not, as the passage says, the chooser. Like so many things, you know, you can take a single idea or concept from one area, and pointed at something else, right?

It applies across the board. How many places in our lives are we just going along without any visualized outcome or goal? In what areas are we showing up to the metaphorical gathering with no ideal outcome in mind? Hoping the right people come to us. The right things appear to us. And of course, you know, life is messy.

No plan's going to be perfect. But there's plenty of truth to that old saying you can't hit a target that you haven't created. That isn't there. And if you don't take the wheel in these little segments of your life, you can't then be disappointed when things don't happen, when the car doesn't go where you wanted it to go. No, the one holding the wheel will determine that. Now let's be real, identifying what you want and pursuing it is definitely more challenging, right? more effort and sacrifice, it's emotionally taxing, because now there's something at stake. But you also position yourself to now get something worthwhile out of the situation, a situation

that you otherwise would have had very little control over, right? I've referenced a few times my eighth grade teacher telling us never to hold our hands up to the sky. And he would clasp his hands together to make this little bowl and hold them out. But he'd say never just hold them out and hope something falls into them. As the saying goes, hope is not a strategy, and I think there are different levels to this for sure. It's one thing to never think about what you want in life at all. It's another thing to walk into a party and snack on the pretzels instead of connecting

with someone, right? They're very different. But when we understand that underneath both of them, underneath all of it, the same principle apply. We can at least recognize where they're happening in our lives. Some small, some bigger, and perhaps more important. Layers do a cake. But why wouldn't it always be beneficial to ask yourself, one, what matters and two, what can I do to bring me closer to what matters? At least then you're cognizant. I think often the greatest opportunities lost are lost simply because we're not aware of them.

So if we make ourselves aware and we miss the opportunity, let's make sure we missed it because we looked it in the eye and chose no. We met that additional layer of resistance and still said no thank you, right? There's intentionality to it. I remember reading Darren Hardy's book, The Compound Effect, and he's someone that is apparently incredibly meticulous about everything. he does, to the point where he would write out a description for his future significant other. Like if it were a dream world, the exact person he was hoping to spend the rest of his life with.

From her eye color, hair, what she enjoyed doing, all that stuff. And, you know, it goes to show you the difference a few years can make. The first time I read that, I thought, well, that's way too extreme. I skipped right over it. Now I look at that and I'm like, yeah, he's just creating an eye. ideal so that in the real tangible world, he can put himself in the best position to attract that person. He's creating a goal. Otherwise, what's the alternative? You just kind of walk around and hope someone appears around a corner someday who aligns with you and what you want and your

interests and it's rolling dice. There are just too many variables in life to constantly be wishing or crossing your fingers, leaving things. up to chance or fate, there has to be some general sense of direction. And I've had this kind of miniature epiphany in many aspects of my life. For example, you know, business, I've been asked, but what do you want it to look like the next five years? It used to be, well, five years a long time away. Do I really need to know? And it's like, if you don't know, then what are you doing today? You're just repeating what you've always done? Are you acting randomly and hoping it takes you somewhere that will make you happy down the road? No, you have a vision and as Bezos has said,

you hold the vision and you continually adjust the process. Again, life is messy. Things will change five million times and that's okay, but there's a better chance good things will happen to you if you identify what they are and seek them out. Even smaller example, Boston, my home, I lived there. I love the people there. But, you know, five years ago, I was at a point where my work was remote, my team was remote. So rather than simply endure, you know, November to June every year, I ask myself, well, what's my ideal lifestyle like? What if I design around that? Why not move somewhere that really excites me? Now I can run in the heat in January in Miami.

That's not a small thing in my life. That makes me a lot happier. And so it's little things like that. You know, you get the point. From the big things to the tiny details, if you don't choose what you want or choose your path, life will simply choose it for you. And that may or may not, you know, be in line with what makes you happen. Or the idea, as many of us have heard in a different way,

if you don't pursue your dreams, you will undoubtedly spend your days working to help someone else build theirs. without you taking control, taking initiative, life will, and you will become a pawn on the chessboard of life. So ask the questions. You know, look in the mirror and delve into the aspirations of the person looking back in. From social events, sure, to your significant other, to your work or business, to your overall life goal. what matters to you?

In these various arenas of your life, what does success look like? What does fulfillment feel like? And once you have that blueprint in your mind, you are now on the road to ensuring its construction. The construction not of a world you were given, but of a world you chose.