Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - 22 LESSONS FROM 2022 | Powerful Motivational Speech | Wake Up Positive

Episode Date: January 2, 2023

"I wish there was a way to know you were in the good old days before you actually left them." - Andy Bernard (Ed Helms)

22 lessons from 2022. Number one, life has hidden costs. This is an idea that Jim Rohn spoke about. A lot really resonates with me. And it's something that I tried to keep front and center in 2022. Here's a quote from him. He says, it isn't what the book costs. It's what it will cost if you don't read it.

In other words, sometimes in an effort to avoid a price up front, we end up paying a greater price on the back end. Along the lines of, if you think going is expensive, wait until you see the price tag associated with not going. Missing that opportunity is what's expensive. But he also comes at it from another angle. He tells a story about his friend who bought a TV. And Jim asks him, hey, how much did that TV cost? His friend says, $400.

Jim says, I don't think so. Try again. And his friend says, Jim, I bought it. It was $400. And Jim says, no, I think it's costing you millions. Referring to the amount of time that he wastes sitting in front of that TV when he could be improving his life, his business, his relationships, his health. The moral of the story is sometimes what we don't do costs us more than we can imagine,

and we have to be aware of those hidden costs. Lesson number two, find the good. So this Christmas, I just got back from spending it with my family up in Boston, and while I was there, our cat that we've had for 20 years, since I was a kid basically, you know, passed away. And, you know, when we went to put her down, I was definitely sad about it. But it was even harder for me

to see my mom and my sister, you know, really devastated by it all. You know, having to say goodbye to fuzzle, right? It's hard to see people you love in a dark place. And so as we walked out of the vet clinic the day after Christmas, I thought to myself, what's interesting is this whole thing was unavoidable. Obviously, 20 years alone is a very long time for an animal or a cat to live. Our time here is temporary. We're passing by. And death aside, there are devastating things in life that are unavoidable,

but you can't miss them, right? Pain is very good at making itself recognizable. We always seem to see it and feel it. But contrast that with the happy things, the meaningful things, the things that we appreciate. For some reason, they tend to be better at going undercover. Right? Like, we don't realize some of our most important moment were our most important moments until they're gone. And I look at this and it's like, okay, Fuzzle wasn't just our cat for 20 years.

She was her childhood. And in a unique way, she represented the Christmases and the birthday parties, the sports. sports games, the friends graduating high school, going to college, moving to new places. A lot of things along the way. And I use this quote all the time because I just think it so perfectly captures the essence of what I'm trying to say here. Ed Helms' character in the office, Andy Bernard, says, I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

In other words, we can't be reminded enough to look for the meaningful thing. the happy and beautiful things. I believe they're more numerous than the painful stuff. They're just so well camouflaged that we walk by them. We don't realize until 20 years later we look over our shoulder

and go, yeah, that was special. 2022 taught me to be better at recognizing and appreciating those good things. Lesson number three, sometimes progress is unremarkable. I was going through some older videos on my YouTube channel and I found a few that I couldn't help but cringe watching back.

And just to be clear, I'm proud of everything I've done. Everything played a role in getting me to where I am now. It's all a journey, and I did a lot of experimenting and pivoting and trying things, and I'm proud of that, right? But I took a little trip down memory lane to roughly 2017 to 2020. I was really experimenting trying to craft my style. And I remembered how during that time, the time the viewership had dropped pretty substantially. Finances were inconsistent. I was looking

ahead and starting to worry, right? And a lot of the time, I just felt embarrassed to still be going. Like my ego hurt when I woke up in the morning. That's just me being truthful. I was working so many hours, more hours than I'd ever worked, and was just seeing things slip. And looking back now, I realized how easy it would have been to quit during that stretch specifically, to have walked away and done literally anything else. But I didn't. I made adjustments, I got better, ultimately pushed through it. But the most important thing I've done in my life was keep going during that stretch. A powerful reminder of just how unremarkable, the most important problem. progress we're making can see.

James Clears ice metaphor. Water placed in a freezer doesn't immediately turn to ice. No, things are happening. Transformation is occurring long before we see that physical confirmation. It takes a while to hit that 32 degree mark. And I hope everyone is aware of that. Every step counts. And I learn this again and again.

Lesson number four. find and push out the negativity. In the book, it takes what it takes. Author Trevor Moward performed an experiment where he made a point for 30 days. And actually, I think you only got to maybe day 27 or 28. But regardless, he made a point to listen to and consume negative media. His list included country music, which was eye-opening for me.

I listened to it all the time. But he references that joke, you play a good. country song in reverse, you get your wife, your trailer, your dog, and your job back, right? A lot of it's inherently sad stuff. He listened to national news nonstop. Sad movies. And the list just goes on and on. And he said, the change was so drastic that it was hard for him to function.

He stopped feeling good about himself in social settings. He stopped early because it was so. debilitating. And this got me thinking about what I consume. Let me tell you there's a lot of negativity that creeps in there from a wide variety of places. And this is number four, because I think we can all be better at recognizing and mitigating those things. Number five, it's not about you. Or at least it's rarely about you. This is a quick reminder I picked up while working through the end of a lease for my apartment. A couple months. months ago I decided I was going to renew for another year.

But it just so happened that the process was a nightmare. Everything seemed to go wrong. Eventually I got to the point where I started to get angry and took the situation personally. Enough was enough, right? So I went down, kind of barged into the office to ask what in God's name was going on, only to find the people that work there running around, trying to put out fires, help a bunch of folks with all these questions and they were being patient and kind under the circumstances and in that moment I was reminded that I made something about me that has nothing to do with me.

Like was it annoying? Sure. But chill on the emotion. It's like detach yourself from the problem and instead of throwing a temper tantrum like a seven-year-old, reallocate the energy to finding solutions. That was a great reminder at an important time. You know, it goes for so many things. Stop taking things personal that are, in actuality, not personal at all. Lesson number six. It's okay to say no. All right.

And this applies to a variety of areas. When things aren't right, a lot of the time you know immediately. Whether, in my case, it's a project I said yes to, but felt burdened by and not excited about. maybe a relationship that felt like a chore, but instead of walking away, you tried to negotiate with the pragmatic side of your brain, or something you're spending a lot of time doing that you know isn't pushing you closer to where you want to be.

You know, a lot of life is being able to break the complex down into the simple. And while immersed in these situations or situations like them, you know, I frequently saw them as more complex. than they were, right? Rationalizing, well, maybe it's right, maybe I'll see down the road, you know, whatever the situation is. But there's a pretty simple rule here. If you get that feeling in your stomach that what you're doing

is not aligned with who you are or something isn't right, probably isn't. And at the very least, it requires some thought. I think we need to be better about trusting that intuition. The things you spend your time doing, the people you spend your time doing, the people you spend your time with, they shouldn't feel like a burden or a chore. They shouldn't break you down. No, they should more often than not light you up.

Lesson number seven is hope versus pragmatism. This year, both personally and professionally, I grew in a few areas. One of them was keynote speaking. It took part in some of the biggest speaking engagements of my career so far, and it was really cool to have taken part in them. But here's what I find interesting. Things seem to have happened so incrementally that I didn't even realize each event was an accomplishment

or the completion of a personal goal until after the fact, like on the car, on the way to the airport, or on the plane, thinking, nice, that was awesome, right? Each event just seemed like the next logical thing. And that's one of my biggest lessons. When you're ready for something, It doesn't feel like the universe is doing you a favor.

There is no hoping. There are no crossed fingers. It's just you doing you. It's the compounding of effort. And when I go back to some of my previous New Year's Eve thinking, it was, man, I hope this is the year I get that big break. I hope this is the year I reach more people. Everything happens.

It all changes. But at the time, I wasn't ready for any of those things I was hoping. for. What we get is proportional to the value we add, and I had a lot to learn. The overall point being, don't ask the world to give you anything. Ask yourself to live your life in such a way that you are ready for it. Build yourself up in such a way that you don't even notice the transformation. Lesson number eight, turn your goals into a lifestyle. There are things that I wanted to change in 2022. I wanted to stay healthy, and that meant less injuries.

It meant cross-training, diversifying my workout. It meant eating healthier. And where I saw the most progress was when I stopped looking at each of those changes as one-off alterations and saw everything in totality as a lifestyle change I was making. One of my favorite quotes is people follow through on who they believe themselves to be. Well, when I started thinking of myself as a healthy, athletic person, living a healthy athletic lifestyle, not only did things feel right, but I found everything easier to maintain. When something's your identity, almost subconsciously, you push out the things that

don't fit that personal identity. You invite in the things that do. And of course, our lives are the manifestation of the little things we do, right? The compounding of habits. And, it. But to me, this highlights the value of creating an umbrella for those little things to fit under. Human beings are storytellers, so tell yourself the right story. Reverse engineer the big picture goal. When you adjust and create a lifestyle, change is inevitable. Lesson number nine, make it count. So this is about the Charlotte Airport. Someone once asked me if I'd been to Charlotte. And I thought, not really, right?

The airport doesn't count. I didn't see any of the culture or the food or the sports teams or any of that stuff. Which got me thinking, what does make you present? What makes anything count? Did you really have dinner with someone? If you were both on your phones the whole time? I'm not so sure. Sure. Did today count if every second you were consumed with worries about what's coming in the future, constantly replaying the past? Maybe. Who's to say? Obvious gray area here. But I'd like to more frequently and definitively move the needle in 2023 to the it counts category of life.

Now I still have to figure out exactly what that means and how it will play out. But I know I can't let my time on this planet be a metaphorical passing through the Charlotte Airport. In a world where distraction seems to be everywhere, I want to position myself to live fully. Lesson number 10. First, find faith in yourself. One of my favorite stories this year was when I was having to live fully. having dinner with a friend of mine, and he was reflecting back on an investment he made to be mentored by someone he thought very highly of.

It was like a two-day job shadow. And he's going through the experience, telling me how he flew over there, met up with the guy. And the entire thing was underwhelming. He was unorganized, seemed to be winging it, wasn't a very nice guy. And my natural reaction was to say, man, I'm so sorry to hear that.

And I'll never forget him pausing and saying the line, oh no, Eddie, that was the best investment I ever made. I learned that if this guy can do it, then so can I, right? What's my excuse? So much of our success is predicated upon us giving ourselves permission to achieve it. Step one is always believe yourself worthy of the journey. Lesson number 11. what you do speak so loud that I cannot hear what you say.

That's a quote from Emerson. And this one's short and sweet. Remember that what people in your life tell you is one thing. But it's what they do that means the most. The way I see it, words are meant to supplement action and nothing more. Lesson number 12 The old way Isn't always the right way

Something that stuck with me As a creator and a business owner Was someone telling me that I had to make some substantial changes To the way I approached my business And after explaining that Hey this approach has been incredibly valuable To me in the past They responded well

If where you are is where you aim to stay Then yeah of course don't change And that simple statement helped me gain some perspective. As the saying goes, what got you to where you are is not the same thing that's required to get you to where you need to be next. You don't climb a 1,000-foot mountain the same way you climb a 20,000-foot mountain. You don't make six figures the same way you make seven figures.

Adjustments have to be made and that's not a referendum on your previous approach, that's just evolution. You have to evolve along with your ambition. Lesson number 13. Embrace the turbulence. I was on a flight and we hit some turbulence at some point. And no matter how many times I go through this, I can't help but feel that unease in my stomach. When I got home, I actually Googled the question, you know, how many flights have crashed due to turbulence.

Surprising to find that answer to be zero. No plane has ever crashed because of turbulence. Still, even after that, right? When I sit through turbulence on planes, that same feeling surfaces. Fear. No matter what we're doing in life, we'll never completely detach from fear. The unknown is an innately scary thing. Now, this is not that feeling of moral or personal conflict I mentioned earlier.

When you know in your heart, you're stepping into shoes that aren't your own. I'm talking about knowing something is right, but fearing the road before you, a very human thing. Change comes with turbulence. It's inescapable. It's unavoidable. But down the road, we often find it was a small price to pay for the new reality. we've just made for ourselves. Lesson number 14.

Expect a lot of yourself, but give yourself grace. Life is often a dance between extremes. Aim high, but step small. Hold a vision, but make, you know, tangible, pragmatic moves. There's something I'm guilty of doing. It's setting the target incredibly high, and then when the swings and misses inevitably

happen, you know, being very upset with myself. You know, sometimes you don't get through everything you plan to do. Sometimes the outcome falls short and that's okay. You know, make the adjustments. Be proud of yourself for expecting great things of yourself and come back better tomorrow. Being your own toughest critic only makes sense if you are your own greatest ally. Which leads perfectly into lesson 15. Yesterday is merely a data point.

There's a quote that states the windshield is bigger than the rear view for a reason. Well, one thing that life has emphasized this year is that when you attempt to innovate and try new things, you'll make mistakes. You just will, that's how it goes. It can be frustrating, you know, replaying the story in your head again and again, the if-onlys and I wish I had. But there's no sense in doing that. because life gave you something valuable. It gave you a data point. So take that and use it to guide and shape future decisions.

The rear view gives you a condensed depiction of what's behind you because its role, while valuable, is nowhere near as powerful as what's before you in the present. Lesson number 16, distraction versus achievement. This is another quote I came across in 2022 that is extraordinary. It's Robin Sharma. He says you can either be distracted or you can do incredible things, but you cannot do both. That is everything.

And it's something I come face to face with every day. You know, to the point where, as I've said before, I have to put my phone in a different room, sometimes even cut the Internet when I write. Because if there's room for distraction, It always seems to find a way, you know, when there's so much distraction in our world. A very obvious example, right? I post my work on like nine or ten different social media platforms. It would be crazy for me not to care at all about them once I send it out there, right?

Of course I'm intrigued and curious. I want to see how it affected people, what they're saying, right? But being better at emotionally detaching once I hit that upload button has been incredibly valuable for me as well as, like I alluded to before, creating boundaries between myself and the technology that houses that back and forth.

And it begs the question, what are your distractions? What can you do to mitigate them? Deep Work by Cal Newport is an amazing read for those looking for stress, strategies on this topic to build upon, I cannot recommend it enough. Number 17, you're never alone. I've noticed that when we feel most vulnerable, we feel the most alone.

Those two things, in my experience, always seem to go hand in hand. But I think it's a feeling that's detached from reality. We are all working, fighting, climbing. So many folks out there are battling their own private hell. In fact, I hear every day from so many incredible people overcoming such a variety of obstacles that it's changed the way I look at the human experience. I see how powerful human beings can be on a daily basis, how we all have our own battles, but we are also all equipped to persevere.

And sometimes I imagine in our darkest moments how incredible it would be to just, jump into this instant conversation or Zoom call with millions of others going through something similar, everyone feeling like they are the only ones until they see that reassurance, until they hear the voices of others battling as well. Because half the fight is knowing that you are not alone, and I can assure you you never are. Lesson 18. It isn't until it is.

it is. Remember that everything is crazy until it's not. Everything is imaginary until it's in front of your face. It's the ability to, as many people describe it, play the fool that changes things. To do big things, you have to start at square one. You have to be vulnerable enough to step out, to see the unseen, walk the path untravelled. And it's a gauntlet that, while not fun to run, is the only way to get to innovation and change. You have to step into a world that is not yours in order to make it so. Everything isn't until it is. Lesson number 19, invest in yourself. Often effort brings tangible results.

But sometimes the most important investments don't pay dividends immediately. it's a long-term play on our personal capability, right? Like reading every day, for example, doesn't bring a tangible result. You don't close the book and see more clients or a bigger bank account. But when there are one or two ideas or strategies from that book that you can now implement into everything you do moving forward, those hours spent reading become truly invaluable. And that's just it.

We want results and we want wins, but we have to remember that investing in our own, ourselves positions us for an unlimited tomorrow. Lesson number 20, life is an adjustment game. As I've been trying to expand what I'm doing, I consistently find standard operating procedure being something I stumble into. Now, basically, things rarely work flawlessly the first time, throwing things against the wall, picking up the pieces, adjusting, and repeating. That's how you learn, oh wow, okay, this works. Let's do more of that. And that's an entirely different philosophy than expecting excellence out of the gate. In many ways, I don't even aim for the bullseye.

I aim to be near it with the trust and understanding that I'll get there in due time. Life is not a perfection game. It will never be a perfection game. It's an adjustment game. Lesson number 21, you are always one decision away. Once you understand this, you understand that you're never down and out. It's never the end. You've never lost. No, it's about using what's around you to make the decision that will change your life. There's a change you can make right now in this moment that will redirect your life trajectory.

There's something you can do in this moment. that will make you better, happier, more fulfilled. Step one is understanding that. Step two is seeking that decision out. No matter how lost or stuck you feel, I wholeheartedly believe this to be true. And lastly, lesson 22, you can often get two for the price of one.

This is the ever-relevant idea that although we feel like working harder is the answer, it's often working smart. smarter. It's utilizing what's around us. And I'm speaking after a year of primarily being in the digital space, but this applies to so much more. There are so many ways to utilize and streamline what we do. To repurpose our effort. To take our work and utilize it in a slightly different way. Take a concept and share it to a different audience, maybe in a different place, on a different platform. I've noticed that so many of my greatest wins come from very small,

alterations to something that already exists or repurposing an idea. Maybe the story's slightly off. Maybe the delivery needs a little bit of a change. Or maybe it just wasn't the right time the first time. You know, I catch myself looking outward for never-before-seen solutions when what I need is already in the palm of my hand. Start from the premise that you have everything you need and work backwards. You will be amazed.

at what you find. I hope these lessons will bring you as much value as they brought me, and that next year we will all be better off because of it. Wishing you a safe, happy, healthy, prosperous, 2023.