Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - BE DIFFERENT | Positive Morning Motivation | Wake Up Motivation

Episode Date: September 12, 2022

"Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.” - Viktor Frankl

What if I fall, the man asks, looking nervously over the edge? Oh, but my friend, a voice responds back. What if you fly? A little quote heard not too long ago demonstrating our proclivity to maintain, to preserve, to protect, to move away altogether from the risk. for fear that we might lose our grip on the status quo. Completely forgetting to think about what life could become if things worked out. Forgetting that life is a game of trade-offs.

And to fixate on never losing what you have means forfeiting the possibility. It is that simple. To stay is a refusal to go. And we need to constantly reinforce the idea, the truth, that what we aren't doing is a decision. And while we place our energy and efforts on minimizing the falling and the failure, someone else is stepping into it. They're capitalizing on it. Falling again and again and again until they can fly. Because the danger is not in falling.

It's in never taking to the sky. It's becoming only a fraction of the person you are capable of becoming with the required sacrifice and courage. It's an understanding that we're not wrong for initially thinking small, playing to not lose, thinking only to protect, protect, protect. That's how human beings arrive out of the factory, right? Stock. And you can thank millennia of evolution for that.

you're not weak for being scared. You're not less than for shaking when you stand face to face with the adversity of life. Again, this is what being human is. But what we also possess is the ability to understand these default limitations and transform them. To understand being scared of the world around us

was incredibly valuable forever ago. When we roamed around hunting and gathering, it made sense not. to inquire further when there was a shaking in the bushes. It made sense not to rashly run into the cave. It made sense to fear deeply the prospect of being abandoned by your small tribe that was the only reassurance separating you from the vast unknown lurking in the darkness, the wilderness.

But anyone listening to this today must also understand that these biological drivers are outdated. The lions in the bushes are no more. The caves are generally metaphorical, and one's quote unquote tribe should be carefully and methodically chosen. Civilization provides that cushion, and what a luxury. So when life pushes back, and it will, and you feel like you're on that ledge, you will want to turn back. Not because you're weak.

But because you've forgotten that the voice in your head screaming in fear can't see the upside. It's blind to the possibility. It only sees downside. It only says, hey, this might bring about discomfort. There are things out there you don't know, foreign entities, possibly adversaries. Why would you even contemplate taking that leap? And that's where you step in and provide reassurance. Yeah, things could go wrong, but the wrong steps are one, usually reversible, and two, provide the wisdom that I need.

It gives you a chance to inject into the conversation that if things go right, your life changes. That this could be the beginning, and that we don't live until the excitement about what life can become if things work out is greater than the fear of what life would regret. into if they didn't. Without upside, there's no hope. Without hope, there is no purpose. And as Viktor Frankl has said, life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.

We're all operating within the same parameters, same playing field. But the difference is, we have different soundtracks, interpretations, and narratives, playing behind our eyes. He may see the world collapsing and spend the rest of his life mourning what is gone, while she may see the same devastation

and bring herself to wonder, well, what can I build in its place? What can arise from the wreckage? Same circumstance, different storyline, different result. I often cringe when I hear mindset, that misinterpreted as this magical thing that becomes reality the second you close your eyes and make a wish.

The law of attraction, as far as I'm concerned, is not magic. I think this whole song and dance is much simpler than that. We act in accordance to the things we believe. And if you believe you're not good enough, if you believe you're not worthy, if you believe more is out of the question, what incentive to you're not good enough?

you have to change? None. It's much easier to default to hating the world when that's your perspective. But when you can find the discipline, even for a moment, to pause and ask, well, what if things got better? What if my life could be more? That spark has suddenly given you a reason to take another step forward. It's made an argument as to why that discomfort. just might be worth it. The magic isn't that you wished for it, and so it was. The magic is that you saw it as a possibility,

and in doing so, incentivized yourself to move towards that outcome. It's hard to gravitate towards something that has not yet been built. It's hard to stand with conviction in defense of a life that hasn't yet materialized. But that, my friend, is the beauty and mystery of life, you don't get what you want until you start living like you

already have it. Like you can touch it, taste it, like it's real. So when the journey feels impossible, know that you are on the right track. You're competing against some very formidable adversaries. Your very DNA. You're competing against the people around you that don't understand. You're competing against the people around you that don't understand. You're competing against the obstacles that make you question whether that conjured up castle in the air existing only in your head could ever come to fruition.

That is some resistance. But as you step forward into the haze, your single solitary acts of courage will begin to tell a story, to take shape. The once make-believe will become tangible. You'll see the pieces coming together, and you'll see yourself as the one capable of assembling them. An architect of sorts, a designer, one with courage and self-belief. The truth is, you will never completely mitigate fear. That will be with you forever. It's par for the course.

You just need to remember that the power of purpose, of meaning, the value of upsize, an opportunity is greater than that nagging voice of fear. It's not about closing your eyes to who you are or where you've been. There's beauty and all that. It's merely about opening them to all you can become. Sometimes it's what we don't say that echoes the loudest. What we don't do that has the greatest consequences where we don't go that ultimately gets us lost. I remember as a teenager

applying to college. I was working on the admissions essay. I was brainstorming with my grandmother talking over her possible topics and approaches. And she read me this quote that's sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, but that's beside the point. The quote states 20 years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails, explore, dream, discover. I thought this was the perfect bridge to the next chapter of my life. The latest horizon, the newest adventure.

I thought it was incredible, and it was. It was exactly what I needed, and so on to that next adventure I went. But here's the thing. As life unfolded this equation, somehow transformed from exploration and dreaming and discovery, into the question, well, what am I supposed to do? Somehow without my paying attention, life turned into a job. checklist. A question I couldn't get wrong. A test I needed to make sure I didn't fail. It's amazing how quickly we forget the infinite breadth of life because we're focusing on the dotted

line before us, the one we're supposed to walk. Sometimes we're so fixated on what the expectation is that we don't ask ourselves where these expectations are coming from. Who is so significant and wise that they know what's best for you to a greater extent than you do. See how that's an important question. And also one you can lose in your periphery as you follow that dotted line before you. When you have a destination in mind, hopes, dreams, ambitions, well, that's an adventure. When someone else has a destination in mind for you, whether this authority is a matter, or not, that's obedience.

And sometimes the greatest disservice we can do to ourselves is to not stop and think, to not stop and ask ourselves where we're going and why. Do you remember when you were a child and you got into trouble, right? Sometimes you get sent to your room. And for me, this was agony. When it was punishment, I wanted to be anywhere but confined within those walls.

I hated being sent to my room. And then finally, the door would open. My parents would say, Eddie, you can come out now. I'd go outside, play basketball for a little bit. And then oftentimes I'd find myself right back in my room. Happy, you know, playing with my toys, whatever I was doing, not a care in the world. And it's like, what changed? Nothing but the context.

Same me, same room, same toys, same whatever I was doing. It was, however, no longer a punishment. And I think this realization is worth exploring. We may not realize. We may not even be able to articulate it. But I think we long for control over our lives. We long to walk our own path. And in this situation, the path led me right back to where I was.

Sometimes, though, the path leads us in the opposite direction, opposite direction, far away to distant world, the end destination is not as important as the fact that we chose it, that we asked ourselves why, and that we believe in the answer and immerse ourselves in its execution. So when Mark Twain talks about the things that we don't do holding more weight in our hearts, it's because those things we tend to skip over are often the very things that breathe life into our souls. We'll go to school to get good grades, to get a 9 to 5, to get a promotion, to get a mortgage on a home.

But the audacity to open that photography studio. The nerve to think you could rent a van and travel the country. The delusion to think you could start that routine that will get you in the physical shape you've always dreamed of. lucky and fortunate to have the things that we have. The quality of life we lead now far exceeds those that came before us. Life is convenient, incredibly convenient. But what is convenient if it comes at the expense of purpose, of meaning in life, because that's what steers the ship? A crisis of meaning ultimately mitigates everything else. There is no exploration without meaning. And without exploration tomorrow becomes a repetition of today not an evolution and what's

incredible truly incredible is that our purpose can be rediscovered our paths redefined how by having a long conversation with you guessed it yourself by putting the phone in another room by disconnecting the Wi-Fi and spending time with you something along the lines of dear self What matters to me in this world? Where am I going right now? Is where I'm going right now aligned with what matters to me in this world? And sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes no great,

but what we have now is a foundation to work off of. An awareness that should be celebrated, that you created. It's so easy to walk through life and never have that conversation. It's so easy to sleepwalk to the tune of someone else's song, the beat of other people's drums. But when you open your eyes, you see the correlation between your thoughts and your actions, your actions and your reality. You realize that when you wake up that tendency to ask yourself what you have to do today, to reflect on your problems, those questions you assumed were normal,

that you never gave much thought to. Well, now you'll see you can dismantle that notion. Now you'll see that if you can ask yourself what you have to do, you can just as easily ask yourself what you want to do, what you get to do, what life is inviting you to do. If you can reflect on your problems, you are just as capable of reflecting on the opportunity at your fingertips. If you can spend time dwelling on whether you're walking

the obligatory dotted line that's been laid out in front of you, you're just as capable of redrawing that line and allowing it to pull you into a new dimension. Listen again, 20 years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sales, explore, dream, discover.

Explore, but for you, wander down those paths that have for so long piqued your curiosity. Try things you once felt like other people were entitled to, but you'd never given yourself permission. Be that for yourself, because no one will come up to you and randomly give you that green light. dream because without building your castles in the air, as Thoreau calls them, you live your entire life on the ground. You'll never hit targets that you don't create. And sure, there'll be a time that only you see the destination. Great, that's life, but with each step forward as it becomes more real for you, it will

make sense to others as well. Trust each step like it is in and of itself a miracle. And you'll find in time that that's exactly what each step was. And lastly, discover. Discover who you are, what you're capable of becoming. As Emerson said, to be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. To forge your own path, build your own life, stay true to your own heart is courage. So sail away

Because you have the ability Because you are strong enough And because the story you're about to write Doesn't continue on Until you turn the page On today's chapter Don't think so much You might overlook the obvious

You might see past All that you've achieved Don't move so quickly. You might overstep the moment. You might miss all the beauty you're created. One can wake up, get dressed, walk out the door thinking that they're on their way to a someday achievable, brilliant finale, and simultaneously fail to understand the miracle of the now. It's in what you're doing now, who you're helping now, what you're becoming now.

Your miracle is now. And you can't see your impact because it materializes behind you as your back is to it and you step toward those distant horizons. There's a direct link between always wanting to be better and never feeling like you're good enough. If you don't properly compartmentalize the two, you'll always be chasing something you can't obtain while you walk right by the brilliance you're piecing together in real time. That carrot just outside of reach for the runner on the treadmill. And I'm not saying your goals and aspirations aren't incredible. I'm not saying you aren't one in a million. And I'm not saying you won't shock, change, add unparalleled value to the world.

No, that's most certainly possible. But I'm saying you're doing that now, too. Like right now, you're not on a trajectory to someday be one in a million. You are one in a million on a trajectory to live life fully. To further expand, explore as you should. But let's not lose perspective along the way. It's hard to watch someone who has changed your life feel like they're not good enough. It just is.

It's hard to watch something so beautiful feel like they must first evolve before they're worthy. And it's like, sure, I get it. We celebrate visible, tangible successes. The innovators and CEOs, world-class talent. People who have built the present and will build the future. Notice there are no ceremonies for the ones who lift others up every day. Who lead by example, who show up again and again when they're going through their own private hell. There are no record books for them.

But I'll tell you what, if there were, you'd be there. And if I could remind you of that every day, I would. The small things you do, do not. feel so small to those around you. In fact, your mere existence changed my life, and I know I'm not alone, not even close to alone. It's a tough world we live in. Tough enough to bring even the strongest amongst us to our knees. Yet you think you're flawed and insufficient. I ask, compared to what? A lot of people would have folded a long time ago. wouldn't be fighting for a dream or standing for anything.

A lot of people wouldn't be giving so much of themselves. Again, I continuously run into this question. Why is it that the ones who are changing the world, not with their social media follower account, but with their actions, so often fail to see their own value? Perhaps they're using the wrong measuring sticks. Maybe their sights are set so high they don't realize all that they're making better along the way. Maybe they don't know that every soul they light up puts in motion a ripple effect, an exponential value add. But if you just lift your head up and look around,

you would see quite the ripple effect, you would see quite the chain reaction, you would see that you are not just working towards change, you are actively embodying it. Don't be the only one who can't see that. Why do I see that? say this, why spend the time? Well, because one, I think it's not something we say enough. The ones who truly change us or make our lives better need to be told that. There's just something tragic about keeping it to ourselves. And two, because you don't give yourself enough credit. You're blind to the path you've traveled and the dragons you've slayed. I couldn't believe my ears when you apologize for being weak. Weak?

Weak is retreating. Weak is being selfish. Weak is forfeiting your gifts. Those descriptors are antithetical to who you are. And sure, we all slip into them once in a while. We're human beings. We all endure our valleys of despair. But to fight with everything you have on your way back up,

that is not weakness. That's courage. I think our definitions might be crossed here. See, I'm a firm believer. that absolutely we have to be our own greatest critics, no doubt. But the value in that,

the expectation, is that it's coupled with a commitment to also be our own greatest ally. Are you? Are you your own greatest ally? Because sometimes I'm not so sure. Do you see

how much light you bring to the world? How much better people around you are when you enter a room and smile, when you listen to them in their problem, when you inspire them by making decisions with so much at stake, when you don't let the hardship of your past keep you down. And I know how hard it's been. I'm telling you this because maybe you don't know. Maybe you talk so much about what the future will be and how big and incredible things will become that you overlook the parallel worlds you are creating with each step

along the way a pilgrim a wanderer in search of an impact you are already making so look keep your head up and your expectations high you will do remarkable things but don't be afraid to look over your shoulder and see that you all ready don't beat yourself up for not yet arriving at an imaginary place while you change the world along the way. Give yourself the same grace and compassion you would give to me. Allow that for yourself. Don't think so much that you overlook the obvious. You just might see past all that you've achieved. And don't move so quickly that you overstep the moment. You might just miss all the

that beauty that you're creating. This isn't a pep talk. This is me holding up a mirror so that you can see the value at. You're not merely an IOU to some future self. You are all the people around you whose lives you make better every day, the lives you touch by being...