Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - BELIEVE IN YOURSELF | Best Motivational Speeches Compilation

Episode Date: December 8, 2021

"Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather must recognize that it is he who is asked." - Viktor Frankl

Nothing in life is as important as you think it is while you are thinking about it. This was written by the author of Thinking Fast and Slow, Daniel Kahneman. And what he's referring to is a cognitive bias known as the focusing illusion. Pretty basic idea means that we elevate the importance of things that we think about while ignoring other aspects of our lives. by thinking about something, it suddenly matters more to us. And while it's easy to interpret this disconnect between our thoughts and reality is alarming, there's also an opportunity here to use this to our advantage, right,

to further become the captain of your ship. I've heard my entire life, think positive thoughts. We all have. But there's value in understanding why that's true. right? Otherwise it just feels like a meaningless ritual. So Connman talks about a study with college students where they were asked about their overall level of happiness and then they were asked about their dating lives. And the answers they gave, there were really, you know, there was no correlation between the two answers. But when the order of the questions were switched, when the students were asked

about their dating lives first and then their overall happiness, the correlation between the two answers increased. The answer they gave about their overall happiness mirrored however they said their dating lives were, at least to a much greater extent. Why? Well, because dating became the variable or the framework that they used to measure their overall happiness, even though perhaps they didn't know. But by focusing on it, it became more relevant.

It bled into other aspects of life, right? You get what you focus on. It's that simple. And the truth is, as I mentioned earlier, nothing is as important as we think it is. Everything is magnified, kind of blown out of proportion in our minds. So the question is, why not use that as an advantage? Why not let that become our strength, realizing that if simply thinking about something can change the trajectory of how we view the world, it can be transformative to simply minimize the bad

thoughts and focus on good ones. Have you ever thought about how delicate the line we walk between not caring enough and caring too much? For example, to feel like existence is pointless, right? Everything's bad, there's no reason to try. That makes it hard to get off the couch, lacking that purpose. But then on the entire other end of the spectrum, to feel like life is riding on every step, to feel like we're not allowed the flexibility or leeway to make mistakes, life matters

too much. That also severely limits how we live, just in a different way. And so I want to explore how do we find that middle ground? How do we find that picture in our heads that puts us right where we need to be? The idea that, of course, today is important. Life is a beautiful opportunity to extract meaning from the world around you, to build something that matters. But It's also no checklist. It's no standardized test. No, it's more of a game. We shouldn't be walking around with the weight of the world on our shoulders

because that doesn't help anyone. Let's face it, life is just not all that serious. As a good friend of mine, Steve always says to me, you know, we are sacks of meat on a rock floating through an infinite, ever-expanding universe, and nothing matters. I've heard him say that a million times, right? Let's go, let's do it. Nothing matters.

Let's make it happen. And I'm 100% get it. It's a check against the idea that the world will collapse if we screw up. That if we drop the ball, it's over. Kind of pointing to the fact that the only way to truly lose in life is to look back and realize we were too scared to live. And so in that context, absolutely, I'm on the nothing matters bandwagon.

But here's the deal about this video or podcast episode, whoever you're consuming it. In a perfect world, it's a buffet, not a menu. It's an opportunity for you to think, to reflect, to pick and choose the pieces here that will help move you along. Because after all, you know, we're all walking different paths. So how could one person present a one-size-fits-all solution to anything? No, the goal is to understand the framework by which we operate,

to understand that the thoughts we think have a monumental impact on how we live. And so if you find yourself on the uninspired side of things, know that there's not a problem with you. You just haven't found a path that lights you up. You are perhaps focusing on the wrong things, right? Not leaving space for the right ones. And if you find yourself constantly smothered by the weight of your own expectations, if every little step, decision, or movement matters too much,

know that you are perhaps creating adversaries that don't exist. That you are right where you need to be, but you have to let yourself live, experience life. One of the most beautiful Victor Franco quotes I've ever heard, he says, ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked. There is so much power packed into this idea. It's like when you look around and see the outside world backing you into a corner, dictating to you how things should be, remember, that you don't take orders from the external world. You create the external world

when all you see is negative. When all you feel are reasons to turn back, when the good in life is hiding away, reach out and find the positive. The one thing that can pick you up and carry you forward. And look, I'm not advocating that we live, in this state of delusion. I'm not saying close your eyes, cover your ears,

and pretend everything's great. I'm saying every day, every situation provides at least one thing you need to be closer to where you want to be. And it just so happens that we're not always inclined to see that one thing, that solution. It just so happens that we need to become aware to remind ourselves, so this is your reminder,

to look for it. Your reminder to focus on the things that lift you up, that breathe life into you, not the things that keep you down. And so here's to finding that sweet spot, right? Walking the line between Victor Frankel's meaning starts with you. And my old pal Steve's mantra, nothing matters, so go live your life. This is not a race. You're not being graded on the outcome here.

You're giving yourself permission to experience that jolt you get when you open your eyes as the sun comes up each morning, knowing that how you're about to spend your time will be a product of the game you designed. A game in which, yes, you'll feel lost from time to time. You'll lose that North Star every so often. You'll question the job. journey you're on. But guess what? When you take responsibility for the circumstance, you also empower yourself to right the ship. You're at the wheel playing the game of life as it was meant to be played on your terms. If it does not serve you, let it go. If it doesn't help you move beyond it.

As Kahneman states, our thoughts grossly over-exaggerate that reality on the ground. So let that framework emphasize your passion, your strength and your dreams, not the inverse. What we focus on, we get. So believe in yourself with such conviction that those around you look on and wonder what gave you the right to see those things. What made you think it was okay to believe in that which you believe? You never got a permission slip in the mail. You never stumbled upon a permit that granted you access to the good things in life. No, you just came to understand the game and how it's played. You came to see that we have options,

the option to find the bad, and the option to find the good. The choice to see why you can't and the choice to see why you will. That's what will separate you from both your past self and those looking on from afar. See, change is never a product of magic as people seem to think. No, most often, it's taking on the challenge of seeing what is not yet there. stepping into the arena with possibility, with the upside. So today, see it. Focus on it, lock it in, and don't let go. With everything you have, all that's within you, don't let go. For everything tomorrow can be, for everything you have always been, don't let go. That's a find our

requires we must first lose ourselves is, I believe, life's greatest paradox, leaving that carousel of comfort. The predictability of what we know, the certainty of who we believe ourselves to be. For a promise with no real guarantee of being kept, well, it's nothing short of irrational. Are the odds in our favor? Perhaps not. But by stepping off, by placing our bets on a different track with a different prize at a different time, we have increased those odds from zero to, well, I guess we decide. And see, the world teaches us that it's advantageous to spin.

A spinning carousel is predictable. It can't be cheated. There's very little room for loss or humiliation or setbacks or even life to get in the way. You know where you start and you know where you end and that's just the thing. This spinning world is so easy that people don't want to leave. In fact, it's not until you walk away from the crowd that you even face the unknown. And that's precisely why it's so hard to walk alone. It's hard. It's challenging because of the night.

not because the now can't be measured or understood, no, we get it, but because there's this little whisper in the back of our heads that the now might go on and on and on forever, that that check will never be cashed, the summit never reached, no, just footsteps down a perpetually long, windy road, and that's, you know, when maybe, just maybe we miss that carousel. We miss the safety and security. And that's what sometimes makes it such a stressful thing to walk alone. We think about all of ourselves, our mind, our heart we've left behind along the way. Truths, we now have to face things.

They never taught us on that carousel. We had to learn that we were wrong about who'd be by our side through it all. We could no longer hide behind the notion that when things got tough, someday everyone, everything would be there would be the same. We learned to swim by jumping into the deep end, seeing in real time that people only believe it already exists. What's put in front of them. That ideas are empty.

That a dream is a language only spoken by its creator. And if you want it to mean anything, you must dedicate your life to translating it. We learn how much is backwards, how much of life is reactive. That success is being one of the few who don't react, but build a world to react to. And in the thick of it all to internalize the process, because talking while talking does nothing,

plans are just potential energy confined to your pocket. You have to be okay growing that seed by yourself, like a runner making her way past a crowd, right? the crowd sees calm, sees peace, sees the finesse of an athlete gliding over the pavement. They have no idea the war being fought behind her eyes. The silencing of constant whispers to slow down to do less,

the repression of pain that consumes her to such an extent. It can't even really be pinpointed. It just kind of floats over her body. They'll never know that. And what we learn, is that they don't need to. It's a truth. And see, it's also what makes it quite lonely to walk alone.

Walking alone, well, it's a lot of things. But it's never boring. It's never dull. And if you can hang in there long enough, without even noticing the headwind you've been fighting, it becomes a tailwind. And where we may have felt alone, the idea pops into our heads that maybe that's not quite right.

If anything, the wind at our back is now momentum. It's a partner along the way. That carousel, yeah, it's still spinning, but somewhere else. Some far off place beyond our field of vision. And no, things don't ever become easy. We wouldn't want that. But difficulty is interpreted differently now. Not a burden, but a cost, and one we'd gladly continue to pay.

And that space, it once felt so empty, so desolate, so helpless. Well, now it's made up of people who see what you see. Who hopped off their own carousels and wandered through the desert, they too navigated through the impossible and the never been done. It's funny how, at some point, we always find each other. And I suppose now, having traded the carousels for the adventure, we can walk alone together. Us against the world, standing up in defiance of the odds,

chasing that glimmer of hope. all in on a pursuit to find what most won't and see what most can't. Not because we were made different, but because we chase down the idea of different. It gets a tough rap walking alone. And in so many ways, it's a fight. It takes all of you. But you don't come out the same person you were when you stepped in.

The same person you were. you'd still be today had you stayed on that carousel. So if you are still spinning, step off. And if you have, if you're still adjusting to the discomfort of reality, if you're making your way through the hell of uncertainty, or questioning whether you have what it takes, or have the strength to commit, I promise. In fact, you're right where you need to be.

So don't be distracted. by those screaming of their successes or communicating, capturing every small win as they make their way around the carousel. It's the quiet ones who change themselves. The ones who take life one step at a time, one battle at a time who redefine reality. And I'm sure you can't see it now. No one can. No one can see the same. sun amidst the storm, but you'll emerge.

Stronger than you ever were. You will navigate towards the ideal and away from that life you once settled for. It's a long path, but it's worth it. So get up and let your feet guide the... Let's go walk alone. It was an ordinary day. those more often than not are the ones worth commenting on for it's in the ordinary that so much is decided. So I got out of bed a little later than usual. That extra spring in my step has been

elusive lately. You know, sometimes we go through those periods where it just becomes challenging to get excited about everyday things we forget why we're on the path we're on. Or as the distinction goes, the fleeting passion has dissipated. And what we're left with, hopefully, is purpose. Purpose is what pulls us through the low point. Purpose is what we latch on to when things aren't exciting or we've fallen down. We look up and say, ah, that's the reason I'm here. That's the reason I will endure. And when we lose that, we're due for rediscovery of some sort. Find Finding it again becomes of the utmost importance. If you think of one single star, alone in the night sky, sure, it's beautiful in its own right.

But it also feels like it's missing part of what makes it so spectacular. The collective. Just like one small step forward or one win or overcoming one obstacle, getting through one day, is great. But it doesn't become magnificent until you look at it in the context of the whole, the bigger picture. And if you can't see the bigger picture, you lose the power of all those little pieces that bring it to life. Meaning brings magic to the mundane. Sometimes I like to think of a character collecting those stars. putting them into a bag he's carrying over his shoulder,

picking them up and dropping them in one by one, moving around the night and collecting those little glowing stories that will ultimately come to mean everything. Eventually, he turns his bag upside down and the stars fall out. And you get this jaw-dropping, spiraling sea of light, Milky Way.

You remember now why each little star matter. Do you think back and go, ah, that makes sense? Difficult to see in the moment. And I think it's this recollection during the trivialities of life that is the hardest thing. It's not that the world is collapsing around us.

No, that would actually give us something tangible to address. It's that the stars sometimes are few and far between. The night feels more prominent than the sea of light that will someday materialize. The hardest thing is not right now. I wrote down recently a list of all the things that were bothering me, right? The things that I wanted to address. I made a list on the left side of the page,

and then to the right of each item, I made a little box. A space to write essentially what I'm doing about it. So, for example, of injury is on the list. Well, on the box to the right, I'd put physical therapy, right, to show myself I'm making progress. or if something business related is on the list. On the corresponding box to the right, I'd put maybe hired a business coach

or creating new services, et cetera. They don't need to be solutions per se. In fact, most won't, but they show me that I'm at least not accepting the areas in my life that I find insufficient. These are tangible obstacles. And they, with direction and persistence, can be overcome. That's saying an elephant is eaten one bite at a time.

And this notebook, it made me feel better, right? Like, this is mine. I get to control how I feel and what I do about it. But again, this is relieving a symptom, not the root cause, because the true elephant in the room, as far as I'm concerned, is finding a way to hold on to the meaning that this list represents. It's believing that all these things pave away to something powerful,

and that is the hardest thing, holding on to purpose, as it elevates like some kind of hot air balloon drifting towards the horizon, and I'm not letting go of that basket. An endeavor that requires faith. And faith is a word that means many things to many different people, as it should. But the bottom line is it requires you believe what you're doing right now will make tomorrow. better than today. If you don't believe you're worthy of a masterpiece, if you don't believe to live is the most incredible of gifts,

and your job is to arrange the pieces that reiterate that in a way that's significant to you, then you have to remind yourself what those stars become when the bag is tipped upside down. You have to remember the subtlety of the journey. And I think that's what I forgot. It had been too long since I stepped outside of the mundane, since I saw a sunrise or sunset, since I looked at the divinity of a universe so much bigger than me.

A container for my little steps, my victories and my obstacles. That list of problems and solutions, it was helpful in the moment. What I needed at the time, it provided clarity. But ultimately, it was one moment. plank or bored in the house being built. See, when the trivial things become the only things, we need to remind ourselves we probably aren't looking at the right things. And maintaining that perspective can be the hardest thing.

But if we can find it within ourselves, then remember that we'll have losses and we'll have wins and we'll have days where we're unsure and confused and doubtful in days where we're certain and positive things are going the way we want them to go, it all comes together to be bigger than the sum of its parts. It means something more. And when we look back down the road, we'll see that everything brought us where we needed to be, that it all mattered,

and that trusting ourselves, having faith in the process, was the answer. So when it happens again and it will, my solution is going to be simple. Both appreciate the mundane and seek out the spectacular. A song or beautiful scenery or good times with the ones I love. Something to remind me that the things that often trip me up

or throw me for a loop are stepping stone. It's possible that my bag full of stars isn't ready to be turned upside down. Maybe there's still a lot of collecting to do, work to be done. But it's evidence. It's all around us, in the magnificence of the outside world, the opportunity awaiting our eyes opening every morning. We don't have to do anything, but we get to do whatever sets our souls on fire, and that

is the incredible distinction. So here's to letting the hardest thing, like our path one step one day at a time.