Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - FOCUS ON YOU EVERY DAY | Best Motivational Speeches | Wake Up Positive

Episode Date: September 26, 2022

"The key to success is to focus on goals, not obstacles" - Anonymous

The most important promises are the ones you make to yourself. Of all the people on planet Earth, it's most critical that you believe you. That when you commit, you show up. When you make plans, you follow through. When you tell yourself you'll do something, you actually do it. Here's what's interesting. being that this is, I believe, the North Star, I'm consistently chasing down this standard, right?

Trying to be better and better and better at following through. Because I clearly think we all should, but keeping promises to yourself is different than keeping promises to others. When you let other people down, especially those close to you, you feel the social repercussions. And for human beings, negative social repercussions are painful.

We care greatly about our reputation. Don't want to let others down. Don't want to be known as the person who doesn't show up. And that's incentive enough to push us towards following through with others. But with yourself, where do the repercussions go? What are the consequences? You tell yourself, today is the day.

I'm starting, beginning, trying something new. And then you don't. There's no phone call with someone on the other end saying, hey, where were you? Hey, you promised. Hey, you owed me this.

No, when we break promises to ourselves, it seems like the situation after maybe a second or two of disappointment, just floats away into the ether. It feels as though there is no substantial cost. But I actually think those broken promises stick around. I think we wear them. We feel them.

We see them when we look in the mirror. And sure, maybe there isn't that friend or family member staring us down with disappointment in their eyes. But how we see ourselves changes. Every broken promise to yourself reinforces the idea that not having high standards is okay. Every time we let ourselves down, it supports a narrative that being let down is normal,

par for the course. If you don't show up for you, it begs the question, why should others show up for you? Why should others follow through? When you wouldn't even do it for yourself? I've always believed that so many facets of life start internally and are projected out. How you see yourself, treat yourself, is the sun around which all that other stuff revolves, right? Like the world will notice and act accordingly.

It will conform to the standards you create for you. So let's work on those standards. Let's make it so there's skin in the game. so that when we break promises to ourselves, say, ah, not today, or this is good enough for now, that we understand the magnitude of those decisions, because they're not insignificant. They're crucial. And sometimes we have to highlight the consequences of what we don't do. Sometimes we have to make ourselves truly feel the opportunities we let slip away.

as though we did actually hold them in the palms of our hands. There is a price to letting yourself down, and perhaps there's power in quantifying it. There's an idea that, you know, life isn't really you versus anyone or anything else. It's you versus you. And just like you would never let a stranger talk down to you or tear you apart,

Why would it be okay for you to talk that way to yourself? Right? Like if a friend says he's going to meet you for coffee at 7 a.m. every morning and never shows up. In what world would you keep driving there, sitting down, waiting, brushing it off and, you know, rinse, repeat? Of course not. You'd look around and go, this is crazy, I don't deserve this, I'm better than this. Your defenses would kick in, you'd make adjustments. And just as you shouldn't tolerate it from someone else,

you shouldn't tolerate it from yourself. Because you're better than that. Growth is a game of, one, identifying what's important. Two, creating small steps that move you in that direction. And three, following through on those steps. That's the formula. Being there for yourself when you fall. Hey, get back up, right?

Falling is an indicator of progress, courage, and strength. Being there for yourself when you don't want to. Hey, I know you're tired. I know this doesn't seem fun right now, but you committed and think about how good it's going to feel when you're done. Being there for yourself when you know there's more in you, but that voice in your head is tempting you to pack it, all in or call it a day. Hey, it doesn't matter what that voice in your head says. There is no

negotiating you already made up your mind. See, there's power and simplicity. Find a target, aim, shoot. And although life is turbulent, there are certainly highs and lows. We are at our best when we decide what's important, initiate the journey, and show up. When I sit alarm clock. It can't be about rationalizing sleep. That beeping can't be about X many hours. No, it merely signifies a promise. It cries out, hey, remember what you said right before you closed your eyes last night? Well, time to bring that to life. So sure, that means be careful of the promises you make to yourself. Don't take them lightly. But once they are etched into the universe, they must be law and I'm not talking about failure to adapt or try things I'm not talking

about being stubborn I'm talking about the initial follow-through that precedes all that will we do what we said we would do and I'm not emphasizing you know making this the standard because life should be some perpetual boot camp but rather because discipline is freedom because when we go to bed at night knowing we set goals and meet them, we see ourselves as winners. People follow through on who they believe themselves to be. It's an endless feedback loop. You see yourself as a winner.

You carry yourself as a winner. You carry yourself as a winner, and other people see it. They treat you as such, and around and around it goes. So when you feel like skipping or procrastinating or quitting on yourself, remember that it's not just that immediate moment at stake it's not a little thing it's one brushstroke on the mural that is your current reality it becomes you and again you wouldn't let other people talk down to you so stop doing it to yourself you wouldn't allow being stood up by others so stop doing

that to yourself become the king or queen of your own empire rule over yourself like it all matters because it does to keep the promises you made to yourself is playing off as it's essentially building a bridge to the outside world so that you may go shape it as opposed to merely putting up your hands and living at life's mercy never forget how much control you have how powerful you are and that you don't You don't need to convince others. You need to convince yourself. During the highs, the lows, the ups and the downs,

the sun and the rain, you need to be there for you. So I'm going to share a life lesson with you, something that over the years has been a true game changer. Ready? It's simple. It's very simple. Like most things, it's easy to understand.

It's easy to comprehend. It's the implementation. that's the challenge, right? But it's the idea that progress is not always a visible step forward. Growth is not always a measurable inch or mile to feel good about it, to celebrate. It's not always a tangible victory or pat on the back. It's a smile about it. Sometimes it's sidestepping.

Sometimes it's stepping backwards, reminding ourselves to look up and gain perspective because we are always inclined to look at the immediate. that's what feels good. And this lesson says, no, there's a big picture to keep in mind. It reels us in. The big picture is what gives us purpose. It drives our happiness. That thing we want on the top of the hill.

The North Star, the X on the map, that's what's sustainable. And I say it's been a game changer for me because, you know, one of my biggest adversaries over the years has been that voice in my head. Almost pleading with me to indulge in the thing that will bring that immediate result. It's money now, growth now, validation now. There's comfort there. Our minds want that satisfaction. That's why you see all those guys standing next to whiteboard saying they have the formula to make you rich tomorrow. We want tomorrow. We believe in some capacity that that can be real tomorrow. But that's what tends to lead us astray. And so I've spent a lot of time reflecting over the years

on how to incentivize those steps that aren't immediately impactful. There's not the flashy you're going to get right now, but I know that if I do it, it's going to bring me to my long-term goal. How do I incentivize that? Because, like I said, the natural inclination is to dismiss it. I'm walking laterally across the mountain so that ultimately I can find the most applicable path and ascend. And that's a scary thing. You know, building long-term gives you very little to immediately slap on a resume,

to brag or rant about at holiday parties. something flashy to impress with, but it's believing in a long-term game, doing what most people can't, trading that certainty that you could have had for an extraordinary later. It's never a loss to do what has to be done so that you can position yourself for the future. Sometimes you have to wade through the muck, work quietly in the dark, so that you can build something that you feel will have an impact. It's not a loss to step backwards to tweak the things you're not happy with. that's not a loss to explore or question or reinvent.

It's true, those actions in and of themselves aren't going to put money immediately in your pockets. But if you find the discipline to see the big picture, you realize that long term, those things bring happiness, contentment, excitement, which guess what? Leads to accomplishment and progress and the financial stability that you're looking for. Chasing flashy things,

chasing the immediate moment, Yeah, I'd get you a quick rush, a nice blast of dopamine, but it's empty. Ultimately, it's unfulfilling because nothing worth having is quick. That's life. But it's often the illusion that guides us, right? You'll never see how many auditions the 33-year-old actor went through before he was cast in a major film. You don't see that. You don't see the countless hours and shows and midnight gigs in front of three people that the rock star endured.

You just don't. It's not celebrated. We celebrate what we see. And what I've learned is that the most important things, they're just not visible to the naked eye. And it's funny. It's like people, they're ashamed or embarrassed by the fact that they're climbing to the top of their own hill

to something truly significant to them because the person next to them is bragging about blindly leaping three steps. And that's great. Progress is great. But unless it's taking you to where you want to be most, is it a win? I have many friends that have left six-figure or higher jobs

to podcast or create or start their own businesses. And people's first reaction is always like, wow, look what you have. Look what you're walking away from. We see scarcity. We are naturally inclined to see life through a lens of scarcity. You need to remember that. That's what we do. We establish and protect our well-being.

That's why I've worked so hard to transform my thinking over the years. To look out and think, who cares what I had? Look what's out there. There are no limitations to what can be yours. If you're not on top of the world, make it happen. And I understand people are complex. Situations, they're not easy, they're intricate. Everyone's different.

Everything is different. But there's a principle that's consistent. And it's that you can always improve your situation. That will never be false. To some degree, you can improve your situation. There's always opportunity. It's just what you see. A friend of mine sent me a text yesterday,

saying the past and the future, they're just imagination. All you have is now. Everything other than split second is the story you're deciding to tell yourself. That's it. Think about that. We're operating off what we decide is real or imaginary, possible or impossible. We're living in a world that is our own. There's no them or they are crowd, just individual people, all telling themselves some variation of a story.

And so taking this back to the point, caving into that pressure, accommodating to the now so that we feel important, so that our self-worth sees that temporary spike. It neglects the opportunity. It makes us feel like we're stepping forward, that we're progressing, but in reality, are we? That voice, that pressure to conform to what will impress Richard next door will always lead to, it will always be to our detriment. And it takes truly what I believe is the most pure, important aspect of life

and sticks it in the closet so that we can feel like we're on par with everyone else. And I'll never forget starting out. And I bring this up a lot because it was one of those moments where I knew I recognized that a huge shift was happening in my life. Went out with some friends from college. And one's working for a senator. One's a Goldman. One's a lawyer. And I'm thinking, well, geez, I just quit my job.

But I have this really cool idea for a YouTube channel. And I just, you know, I don't think any girls are going to be swooning over that. And I struggled, right? At the time, it was difficult for me. And I look back and I'm just thankful every day that at the time I was able to be. to locate somewhere in my soul the courage to stick that out to believe that if I executed on this dream, I could have an impact. Because like I mentioned above, it was painful in the moment. But when you think big picture, bigger things happen, right? I'm doing things now that I never,

ever would have been able to do if I didn't have that desire to do the unconventional thing. If I stopped at sort of the discomfort, or if I stopped when I felt like I was losing this imaginary race to those people around me, I wouldn't have the creative flexibility that I have now. I wouldn't be able to do what I do now. I wouldn't have the people in my life that I have now. You have to earn that every single day. And it makes me wonder how many people stopped when they could have taken their own path, brought their own unique vision into existence if they didn't retreat when they felt like they were a lone wolf, when it felt like they were losing a race that didn't exist, when they felt like their neighbors were getting ahead,

or their classmates, or their friends were doing the conventional things, so they had to. They were too scared to step backwards, and I'm telling you right now, I'm telling you that step backwards, that ability to temporarily find yourself, to create yourself, that will mean everything. That will open doors for you that would never have existed. You never would have come across them because you would have been too scared. to look for them. You have to make opportunities. Simple metaphor, gumball machine. Gunball does not come out if you don't put the quarter in and turn it. It's a price that has to be paid. Except in reality,

the price is a lot higher than a quarter because we're conditioned to want to fit in. We're terrified to look like we don't know what we're doing. Every significant thing around you stemmed from someone pushing into that unknown. It came from someone risking everything. It's not easy when your family doesn't know what you're doing, your friends don't know what you're doing, or you don't know what you're doing. But if you want to have an impact,

that is the road you have to take. That's the cost you need, the price that you need to pay. It'll be a hard year or two years or three years, but you won't regret it. So hopefully this can be a reminder to you. when I talk about lateral steps, that's the sentiment I'm trying to recreate. I think that's the great thing because it means the people who create, who build something meaningful, they've earned it.

And that's what I tell myself every day. Earn that dream. Earn that change. Take that road less travel. What you're doing right now is not insignificant simply because it's not immediately bearing free. I think if you listen to this back from the top, you'll notice the constant theme, immediate, now, present. These things are delusioned. As far as results are concerned, the word immediately is a con artist.

Action should be immediate, but results, no, they are gradual. They require persistence. Stick with it. Remind yourself to look up because that's what you're after. It's a pursuit. You're building a foundation. You're creating the things that permanently alter the art. artistic and political and social landscapes.

That's remarkable. It's the road few have the patience to walk. Remind yourself why you're skipping the small stuff, brushing off the little winds and losses. And why building something substantial in silence is more powerful than gloating and screaming at the top of your lungs after every visible step. Look up.

Remind yourself that you are going to change the world and you can see it. I'll never forget. forget listening to Jim Rohn, was taking a walk in the middle of the day. I needed to get out, decompress, rethink, re-align. And this message came through my headphones. He said, we must all suffer from one of two pains, the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret. weighs tons. And I needed that. I needed that because sometimes we forget why. In the midst of the

day-to-day, the trials and tribulations of life, we forget why we endure. And there's a strange dichotomy that exists because, you know, you can't measure discomfort that hasn't arrived yet. You can identify regret that hasn't materialized. Yet in a way, you have to. You have to somehow make that tangible. You have to know that sacrifices of today deliver you from the anguish of I wish, or if only, or maybe I could have. I've heard it said that humans' ability to delay gratification is what makes us so you know. unique, incredible even.

But that doesn't mean it comes easy. So as I walked, I became reacquainted with the trust that I had in myself in the future, in the steps I was taking. It wasn't that I'd reached some grand finale, but that I gave myself permission to stop constantly expecting one. When things didn't go as planned, feeling disgusted with myself when I fell short. This is after all part of a process. And if one stays the course, builds a foundation of discipline to guide them towards what they believe in, things will evolve.

We feel uncertain because new things don't have a precedent, at least not a personal one. that feeling of, I wish I knew or had some predictability. It's real. It's common. But if minimizing regret is what means the most, then it also means that we must have the discipline to walk steadfast into the unpredictability of tomorrow. A long-term, sustained discipline.

And one of my favorite interviews, Bronnie Ware, who wrote the top five regrets of the dying, was talking about surrender, and how she mentioned in her book, Letting Go. And I asked her, can you explain that? What's the angle? Because the way I look at life, there's always something you can do. You can always improve your situation somehow. And she basically said, it's not about what you can control, what you can do.

It's about putting yourself in position to live the life you want to live and then letting go of that which you cannot control. It's about not worrying over external forces as you walk your path because all you can do in life is walk your path. And that became the marker or the question, am I walking my path? Right? Now look at it like this. First, a vision gives you direction, purpose, keeps you excited, injects meaning into life.

Second, discipline keeps you moving, becomes the tiny steps that transport you through your pursuit of meaning. And third, trust in the process. that you are here to give everything you have to give and then the rest, as Brunny says, must be surrendered. But the reason I bring this up is because all of it fits together like a puzzle, like three pillars of a Parthenon. And when people reach out to me all the time,

they're upset that they're not as disciplined as they'd like to be. And they're listening to them, the speeches, they're watching the videos, they're absorbing the content, trying to improve. But nothing seems to get the engine going. And I'm wondering, what is your North Star? What are you aiming for? Because as far as I'm concerned, it's impossible to be disciplined if you don't have a reason. You know, when Jim Rhone states that the pain is in ounces now, Well, there's an implicit Compared to what

Being asked, right? Compared to that top of the mountain That you'd presumably miss out on. So if the mountain top's not defined, You're on a fool's errand. That's why I had so much trouble With my old career, for example. It's hard to be disciplined.

There's no buy-in on the purpose. Using my previous metaphor, it's little steps, sure, but towards what? If you don't know, it's only practical then to look around and ask yourself, why am I taking them? Why not go drink with my friends? Why not stream this series on Netflix until 4 a.m.? Why not skip the workout? You can listen to people on YouTube scream at you to do more and be more and try harder all day.

But without that piece, it will not get you very far. A vision that disqual. to pursue it and a trust in the process. And you could say the same with someone who might have a clear vision, a dream, a perfect idea of what they want, but never take action, right? The discipline never materializes. It makes the endeavor just as meaningless.

Things don't change until you take that big picture, that vision, and you break it down into little things you can do every day. That's it. And isn't that that, And isn't that amazing? The greatest, most influential people, from the friends and family that inspire us, to the greatest athletes and entertainers,

to our greatest thinkers, creators, world leaders, all they do is a handful of things consistently every day in the direction of something that is meaningful to them. A process that has been talked about since the beginning of the, time. The compound effect, as Darren Hardy calls it. That breakthrough was huge for me. The realization that I don't need to leap any mountain. I just need to ascend one tiny rock at a time. And that is not a superhuman ability. That is a single decision. So here the question isn't can you be more disciplined? Of course you can. The question is, which few things are most meaningful to you? Which will you be focusing on every day so that they expand and inject value into you in the world?

And then, lastly, there is trust, sometimes the most difficult, seeing the unseen, maintaining confidence in that which is unknown. An incredibly challenging expectation in an instantaneous world, a world where things are immediate. Feedback is immediate. Messages are sent across the planet instantaneously. Goods and services arrive within hours. We have forgotten patience because it is disintegrating before our very eyes.

We are a society of now. But the best things in life, they take time. They require that we hold up our end of the bargain and that we trust life will fall into place. Belief in a process that will come to mean more than anything that arrives in 30 seconds ever could. A vision, the discipline to pursue it, and a trust in the process.

So perhaps you're overdue for your midday walk, your little excursion into the soul, to ask yourself, what is it you are moving towards? Why are you doing what you're doing? Does it mean something? And if not, perhaps some adjustment is in order. Perhaps you've lost sight of that North Star that lights up our lives and illuminates the way. Take solace in the fact that life is. not as serious as we make it out to be.

We don't live in a world of right and wrong, good and bad, yes and no, but a continuum. An opportunity to seek out and find the beautiful ups and the meaningful downs to set our sights on the horizons that matter. See when the little things feel too complex or burdensome, it's because the big things are misaligned and that is a powerful idea to grasp it's never that life is too difficult it's that we have closed our eyes so don't be fooled by those selling you reality as some problem some obligation that must be dealt with no today is the greatest gift of your lifetime and the same will be true

every day moving forward. And to echo Jim Rohn, absolutely it is a gift comprised of sacrifice, discomfort along the way. But that's a small price to pay for entry to the show. For the ability to embrace the mystery and embark upon the adventure when you're pointed to the right north star, while the road, it feels less. treacherous on your feet the hills less strenuous on your legs what we often

deem to be a lack of preparedness ability strength well might just be a lack of alignment so adjust because this world flexible and limitless invites you to do just that it invites you to explore until you've uncovered your vision to pursue it like nothing else matters, to sidestep the obstacles, invert the setbacks, and lastly to find hope when there appears to be none.

To set your sails, walk your path, run your race and surrender to that which is beyond your control. And you'll find that with a vision, with discipline, with trust in the process, there is no situation or circumstance outside the scope of what's possible.