Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - HAVE COURAGE, BE FEARLESS | Powerful Motivational Speeches | Start Your Day Right!

Episode Date: November 30, 2022

"Freedom lies in being bold" - Robert Frost

Freedom lies in being bold. Robert Frost. Something caught my eye on Twitter, not too long ago. It was a headline referencing the boldness of wolves in the wild. So I clicked it to delve a little deeper. It took me to an article by Emma Maris. And here's the summary at like a 10,000-foot view. Okay, basically there's a parasite called T. Gondi.

that infects animals and then causes those infected animals to act bold, perhaps even reckless in some situations. And the article states why and goes into some great detail, but for now I'm going to jump right to a specific point, because there's a part where the article mentions how two wildlife ecologists, Meyer and Cassidy, studied wolves at Yellowstone for 27 years. and upon studying them they find something very interesting after taking blood samples from 229 wolves

they found that wolves infected with that T. Gondi parasite that again makes them act bolder were 11 times more likely than uninfected wolves to leave their birth family and start a new pack. The infected wolves were also 46 times more likely to become pack leaders, which Maristates are often the only wolves that breed. And so this appears to portray a direct link from boldness to increased social status and possibly even reproduction rates.

With that boldness comes risk, sure, but with risk comes reward upside. Now obviously, the day-to-day actions of wolves at Yellowstone is not a very-to-day. an apples to apples comparison with human beings functioning in society. But personally, I can't help but feel the value contained in the case study. In fact, it was my thinking about it while falling asleep that prompted me to find the article again and share it. For the simple reason that I know there are places in my life that I can be bolder. I know there are places in my life where I can dial up.

that risk factor in exchange for results that supersede what I have now. You don't get more without giving more. And I know there are places I can give more. In fact, I'm pretty confident there are places every single one of us can give more. See, here's the thing. Being bold means drastically different things to different people. And it's in this truth that the magic is found. Boldness for one person might be completely different from someone else. It might be more travel. For another, it might be taking on a project at work. For another, it might be leaving a detrimental situation. For someone else, you know, going through a low point or deeply challenging time, it might be simply getting out of bed. We are all operating on different planes at any given time.

My bold today won't be my bold next week. That's just the way life works. but here's what I do know. We can all find within ourselves that courage to be bold in whatever arena we are in. And every once in a while someone will say to me, yeah, but Eddie, can't you just be happy where you are? Why does it always have to be the next thing, or bigger, or better, or more? To which my response is, look, of course we should be grateful for what we have. Of course, we should appreciate the gifts and the beauty that surrounds us,

day in, day out, because it's there and it's infinite. But, and you knew there was a but. Human beings are purpose-driven. Our happiness is often derived from our progress. Our journey is the destination. And we often find when we look around that we have given pieces of ourselves away, sometimes without thinking about it.

Perhaps we become stagnant, with areas of ourselves that can be elevated, that are destined to evolve. I love looking back at those courageous moments in my life. They mean everything to me. You know, I like to say it's the small things repeated day in and day out that make us who we are. The vast majority of the time, I believe that to be true.

But those pivotal moments, those opportunities that our consistency creates for us, Well, boldness in those instances changes everything. Walking onto a stage when you've never spoken before, when your body is physically rebelling and you don't want to walk on stage, is everything. Calling U-Haul, packing up and leaving a situation that's no longer in your best interest, is painful, it's instantaneous, but is ultimately everything.

Making an investment that you believe in. deciding to hire someone with incredible vision and talent, being vulnerable enough to share your thoughts with the world, these things are risky, they are bold, but in your world, they are everything. And so the obvious connection here is our desire to lead in a world seemingly void of adequate leadership. It's setting an example.

It's not settling for the ground floor when the sky is the limit. Yes, on all counts. But it's also leading, leading yourself. At times we forget just how important that is, that you need to lead yourself to something meaningful. Significant change does not come along without your initiating it. No doors open if you don't knock.

The world will only give you what you ask of it. And I'm here to remind you that asking more of the world, yes, it's hard, it's uncomfortable, It requires you to be more today than you were yesterday, but you are capable of that. You are bold enough to be that. Robert Frost says freedom lies in being bold. I believe that's because in your courage lives the infinite.

Upside so powerful that one simply cannot grasp it while standing still. So go. So go. Go find those areas of life, your life, where you know you're holding back, where you know when your soul you have more to give, and breathe life into them. Knowing that sure, and being bold, missing the mark is a possibility. But in never leaving, it's a certainty.

If you never go, you will never arrive. So find the courage to ask more of yourself because more there is. For a second, imagine that feeling in your stomach. The nerves, the discomfort, maybe even the doubt as you walk up to do that one thing that scares you, that stretches you just a little bit further than you're ready for. And as you move towards that sort of dark, unknown, the mysterious discomfort, what's on your mind? Are you starting to rationalize?

Maybe you're asking yourself, hey, why did I do this to begin with? Seemed like a good idea at one point. It seemed bold and adventurous. But now it seems like the wheels have hit the road and the narrative is shifting in real time. So try and recreate that feeling for a second. Looking fear in the eyes. Capture what it means, physically, mentally. For me, it was public speaking.

Half a decade ago, standing backstage, palms sweating, little voice in my head saying, hey Ed, a cubicle doesn't seem so bad right now, does it, genius? Maybe, you know, for you in this scenario, it's that big test that feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Everything's on the line. Maybe it's something like starting a conversation with a complete stranger, or interview for a job you want, starting line of a race,

having the courage to speak your mind online. Maybe it's doing something your family doesn't quite get, or your friends won't understand, cutting ties with what's comfortable, a decision to be what you've always wanted to be, there's a million possibilities. Right? There's a lot of fear that we dance with on a day-to-day basis. But in that moment, as your feet start moving in the very direction that will bring your ideas closer to your reality,

and you're hit with that same feeling, that wall that tells us something isn't quite right. That's what I want to discuss. Because it's hard to be met with this feeling and still move confidently in the same direction. There's cognitive dissonance there. How can something feel wrong and be wrong? right, should there be disconnect? You know, it's funny, I really enjoy reading quotes, and particularly Lewis Carroll has resonated with me over the years. You know, things he said in his works, they're witty, they're funny, but they're powerful. And one in particular stood out to me.

It's why sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. I just loved the concept, the idea of immersing yourself in the impossible, in the difficult, the thing that's not right in front of you, that's sort of creating it as you go. So I got through the looking glass and adventures of Alice in Wonderland. It was an interesting read. I'm not sure I'd recommend it for everyone, but there was certainly one thing that popped out at me, that I found incredibly valuable. And it was in Alice's journey holistically, right?

So just she goes into this rabbit hole and the world is basically upside down. Nothing is as it was before she jumped. Nothing really makes sense. And what you see is her progression as a character as she starts continually embracing the thing that feels abnormal. Upside down and weird. But with each decision to move forward, she completely re-examined. redefines this insane world that wasn't particularly warm and receptive to Alice to begin with. She stands up to a queen running around ordering executions.

She navigates a world with new rules and guidelines. She transforms the boundaries that used to define reality. And what I think is valuable is that there really wasn't this boom transformative moment where everything changes. She just keeps subtly saying yes. She keeps moving forward without knowing for sure how things are. will work out or unfold, as if she's supposed to. And she becomes so accustomed to suppressing that feeling of fear and uneasiness that it

almost becomes comical. She goes with it, it becomes the author of a new story. She becomes untouchable in this world. And my point here, and for those of you not a fan of Alice in Wonderland, I appreciate you hanging on, but where these dots connect is that it's actually a pretty simple idea. unfolds in a way that is unimaginable when we shift our thinking from oh no here comes that feeling in my stomach again my heart's pounding my palms are sweating so I've wandered too far when you change that to here comes that feeling in my

stomach heart pounding palms sweating so here comes the beginning of something incredible life shifts see it's not running from that temporary feeling of fear and discomfort, but harnessing it. It's a weapon. It's a tool. It fuels the rocket ship headed to the moon. It's the water that that seed of opportunity is dependent upon. And sure, it feels new and unsettling. And yeah, it's uncomfortable.

But so is, as we learn, everything good. And sure, you could turn back. You could avoid that manufactured conflict, confrontation altogether. But, man, you have to be. be okay never knowing what those peaks could have been. You have to be content imagining a life of adventure and not living it. And to me, that's a much steeper price. Right? Because that feeling of fear in your stomach, it's temporary. It goes away. But the feeling of knowing you walked away when life held out its hand and offered you more, that doesn't go away. And see, I look at it like this.

Two things change every time you say yes. Every time you acknowledge the organized chaos and move forward anyway, you move both your internal and external worlds one step forward. Internal because life is your identity. And as has been said before, humans always follow through on who they believe they are. I've heard actors saying the most important decision they make is the shoes they put on. because it lays the groundwork for how you feel. You just feel differently about yourself in clown shoes

than you would in basketball shoes than you wouldn't dress shoes. You feel different about yourself in a suit than you wouldn't sweatpants. And this doesn't mean go reassess your wardrobe, but highlights how malleable identity is. Yeah, we follow through on who we believe we are, but the powerful thing is who we believe we are is created every single day. Every time we use fear to propel us. forward, right? Your subconscious goes, okay, that's who I am. Someone who does the uncomfortable

thing. Someone who is okay with fear, that's me. Right? And that's the internal foundation that means everything. That's how identity is constructed. And if you stack that up with action every single day, you won't even be able to recognize yourself. That's the internal transformation. Then there's the external transformation. Every time you push through fear, you level up. Not significantly. You aren't immediately transformed. In fact, sometimes you don't even notice, but the truth is, after you say yes, after you take that step, you're fractionally further

than a few minutes earlier. Your relative ceiling is now the floor, and it's time to take another step. This is how you create distance over time. So when you hear the word fear, let's rewire that reaction. Let's change how we think about it, because it's not a monster in the world.

closet. It's not some demons staring you in the face. No, it's a ticket to something more, something to be embraced and coveted. It's the next little step in your journey, and why when most of the world bows down to that feeling of discomfort or instability and stays the same, you will have moved forward. Not in a single leap, but a step. A step that over time will become the reason that at some point, when you look over your shoulder, you'll find a life, a world, a reality that is unrecognizable in the context of where you began.

It's why fear is not to be avoided or even tolerated, but sought out as the single variable that puts a pulse in your aspirations, gives hope to your dreams. The ideal life is not predicated. on the avoidance of fear, but the ability to harness and capitalize on its power. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year?

Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master aesthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories, skincare, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2025 with confidence. Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products or building one from scratch,

Dime makes it easy. The work system, our all-in-one best-selling routine, includes a cleanser of your choice, toner, serums, and moisturizers, taking the guesswork out of skin care for your healthiest, happiest skin yet. Dime's commitment to clean ingredients and sustainable packaging ensures every product is as gentle on your skin as it is on the planet. With thousands of glowing five-star reviews and a loyal community, the results speak for themselves. your skin and give yourself the routine refresh you deserve by visiting dimebeautyco.com. That's dime beauty co.com. Your best skin awaits. Sometimes what you don't do is more powerful than what you do.

Sometimes the answer is not the home run or some lifetime achievement award. No, sometimes the answer is simply hanging on. realizing that the yeses, they're important. But they're nothing compared to the noes. No, to the faint whispering that you can. No to the feelings of inadequacy and no to the reflection staring back at you that just feels ordinary.

As that feeling, it's wrong. And what this means is I was once told. is that success is not always the spectacular. Sometimes it is simply hanging on when others would let go. When the world would hear that same faint whisper and bow down because, oh, we all hear it. Life is not a movie. There is no fixed ending.

And where there are unknowns, there is fear. That's not rocket science. Unknown's equal fear. But if a bit of a movie. If I may, let me explain something. Because where there is fear, there is also something else. And that something is opportunity. Like a curtain that must be pulled back, an ocean that must be crossed or a toll that must

be paid. While you dance to melodies of songs unwritten and are led by the characters in stories untold, This is not a game of the miraculous. This is a game of self-belief. A game of not personalizing the people that are going to let you down. The days that will bring you to your knees, it's not feeling inadequate when you swing and miss because you will. And I hope you do.

I hope you do because each swing makes you stronger and each loss makes it easier. to say no to that ship that wants to bring you right back to the port you left from. How comfortable, how safe, how secure it would be. But just like fear and opportunity are one in the same, so are safety and regret. A concession, a wolf and sheep's clothing, and they are a lot of things, but they are not you. So forget about the grandiose. The magic is not in the moon. It's in the staircase that takes you there.

Each step, each battle, each time you fall, smile to yourself, and carry on. Because the difference between average and exceptional is the ability to make a single decision. The decision to hold on. To stand firm when the people. around you turn back to believe in your foundation when the walls close in. It's running a race with eyes fixated on each step. Not on the finish line. No, the finish line doesn't do anything but distract. It reminds you of the road to be traveled. Your job is not to make a finish line appear it is to say yes to the step in front of you and know to everything else.

See anyone can take one step. Anyone can progress one foot. Races, journeys, life is simply a culmination of those steps, a culmination of little decisions to not let go. So when your arms shake. in the voice in your head screams. When your thoughts beg you to stop and your mind starts to rationalize the possibility of surrender, remember that big things are broken into little things.

Minutes are merely seconds, mountains are merely rocks, and success is simply hanging on when I'm not only seconds. when others would be letting go. I find it interesting that what we want most is often brought about by the inverse of what we'd expect. It's a paradox that's amazed me for much of my adult life. And what do I mean? Well, here are a few examples. The best way to achieve freedom in your life is to be incredibly disciplined.

two things that are seemingly opposite in a sense. Or the worst of times often open the door to the best of times. Or it's from a position of strength that one is best able to ensure. Or from our suffering, our pain comes our purpose and contentment. And you get the point, I could go on and on and on. But the reason this is so important, why I think it's worth discussing, is that it sheds light on the value hidden within our struggles. You know, when you realize the paradoxical nature of growth, the discomfort makes a little more sense.

It's easier to wrap our hands around. So let's say getting up early. Perhaps you weren't a morning person, but you're trying. You're trying because you think those few extra hours in the morning will add some lift. Right? The alarm closed clock goes off, the last thing you want to do is open your eyes. Maybe you even start thinking, who cares, right? This isn't that important. You begin rationalizing ways. You'll go back to bed and just make up for the time throughout the day. But when you simplify the equation, you realize what you have is an opportunity. And you're either going to say yes and capitalize on that opportunity or say no.

and stay where you are. Discipline, even with the small, seemingly trivial stuff, becomes freedom. And if you want to position yourself for a life on your terms, where you're at the wheel on your schedule, it means facing demons just like this. It means you fight your fight now so that you can mitigate it later. rather than saying, I wish, or beating yourself up for not being a little bit tougher in the moment,

you instead get that sense of accomplishment. You get the luxury of time and freedom. And I think that's a simple but perfect example of how discomfort in one moment becomes contentment in future moments. Not a very intuitive trade-off. Or how about our low points? We all know no one escapes low points. I've always found them easier to handle and internalize when I know that it's bringing me closer to something valuable.

When I know that there's something good on the other side and that the pain I'm feeling, the thoughts that are inevitably going to pass through my mind like clouds on a windy day, they're obviously not ideal. But they're not a waste either because something will come of them. And the goal in that moment under the duress is not to move the immovable. After all, you can only control what you can control.

But it's to simply put one foot in front of the other until you emerge from the storm because we all eventually emerged from that storm. It's when we get into the habit of trying to do what is outside the scope of our control that we do ourselves a disservice. Because look, we're human. Equipped with human biology and human emotions, navigating a tough world that is indifferent to how we feel or what we think. And while we can certainly strengthen and fortify that emotional IQ, the reality is no one

is on a high all the time. Life is ups and downs. And when we realize our superpower is not to fight the down times, but to accept them, take them in stride, learn from them, and extract the value, we empower ourselves. We're giving ourselves permission to live life just a little fuller after what we've experienced. The human experience requires many seemingly contradictory puzzle pieces, all working together in unison to create that final illustration. we're looking for.

Not just discipline and freedom, not just low points and high points, but countless others. Jordan Peterson, of course, famously discusses chaos and order and how both not only exist, but are pivotal to a fulfilling life. We are designed for chaos. We must step out into unknowns,

situations that feel bigger than us. The courage to do something. so ultimately becomes the pathway to order. As we get used to the change, we acclimate, we find our answers, and ultimately create a sense of fulfillment. The challenge being that now we have conquered our demon, we must prepare for the next. Because just like too much chaos isn't good,

too much order is equally destructive. Another example of something we'd assume as negative. Chaos. being the thing in actuality that paves the way for better days. It's a staircase. I've heard Tony Robbins say something similar when talking about our need for both certainty and uncertainty. We must have some elements of everyday life mapped out,

but too much creates a mundane existence without the adventure and growth we've been looking for. It's from the unknown we capture more of ourselves It's from the uncertainty we get growth. And I say all of this, not just because I think it's fascinating in and of itself, but because it's incredibly easy to forget, especially in the thick of things that it's all essential to life working the way it should work. Those losses become gains.

The disappointment becomes growth. The downtimes become launching pads to evolve experiences, greater adventures and new chapters. It's certainly not intuitive to look in the mirror when amidst life's chaos and say thank you to the universe. I get that. I'm not implying that you should. But I am saying it helps to know, it helps to be aware of the paradoxical nature of your journey.

I look back at the times I was most fearful or angry at myself. And if I could go back until that verse. version of me one thing, it would be that all that adversity is going to push me forward. That I'd never have the things I wanted most if I didn't step into all that discomfort. That it's going to be okay. That I'm going to be incredibly thankful for it all and so will you. This is the push pull of life. The chaos and order of the day.

It is not in spite of, but because Because of those moments, you'll be more than you've ever been. The human experience is a paradox. And the quicker we get that, the quicker we let it work for us. No more fighting unwinnable wars, but rather taking all that we can control and using it to lift ourselves up, to be our best selves, to make tomorrow. the miracle that it can be the hard thing brought me through hell but also to that which exists on the other side the hard thing prompted me to question and doubt but also provided the pieces I used to build my confidence little by little it

made me ask the tough questions the ones maybe I didn't want to hear the answer to, but also gave me the power to transform those answers I didn't like. The hard thing meant forfeiting being the expert in my world in exchange for the role of student in a foreign arena. It gave me new ladders to climb, new possibilities to reach for. It showed that true growth requires a willingness to be the beginner. It took some people out of my arms, my circle, my work, and in some cases my life altogether, but always seemed to open the door to those souls better aligned, to those conducive to the journey and the process.

Let's remember what the hard thing is. Beyond the pain, because we all know it does bring that. Beyond the challenges, because there are certainly many. Beyond all that exists the hope and the change and the promise. Robert Frost says the best way out is always through. Through because it's the chaos, the haze, the darkness of night that shapes us. It's in being broken that we learn to rebuild our world with the pieces and perhaps most importantly. We learn that such a rebuilding process is possible to begin with, that the now is not mandatory or permanent.

The hard thing, as it turns out, is nothing more than a transaction. Turbulence for the view above the clouds, fear in the moment for confidence in the future. It's learning that although life sometimes appears to paint a picture of conformity, and helplessness, there's always a path leading to the very place we need to go. It just asks we find the courage to walk it. Churchill has said the pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity, the optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty. And this beautiful message rings true because from the difficulty, it's a difficulty in every difficulty

the advantage and sure our first instinct is to see the problem our eyes tend to initially fixate on that which is unfortunate but beyond that is where we get the most incredible things life provides as if one is removing the shell or outer layer in order to get to the nutrients in the center the ingredients required for growth the pieces necessary to experience life at its full And so we must be reminded that those opportunities, they're not rare, they're not reserved for everyone but you. They just tend to disguise themselves as the things we're most inclined to disregard or walk by. But if one finds the courage to move into them, through them, if one can see the difficulty not as a deterrent, but as a bargain, they'll be given everything on the way.

the other side. Reality is not changed with the magic wand or the granting of a wish. It's from staring down the heart thing and moving directly into it one little step at a time. There's a quote from Naval Ravakant. He says the closer you are to the truth, the more silent you become inside. Found that interesting. I've got an email recently from someone asking for my thoughts about their being overlooked for a promotion at their work. They say that they're dedicated, they work hard, they show up and execute. So what is the act of being overlooked mean?

Well like so many things it's contextual but let's play with it. What does feedback ever really mean? It means what you decide it does. So I see the act of being overlooked, as this person expresses. Let's look at it as an iceberg, that rejection as a floating block of ice in the Atlantic, and the top, the piece that's exposed and above water, the smaller piece. Is your chance to look around and self-reflect? To ask why.

Where are the places I could strengthen myself? The gaps I could close and the spaces I could occupy. You know, disappointment, it causes us to self-reflect, and that can be a valuable thing. There are often tangible, quantifiable reasons we didn't hit the mark, and I think that top of the iceberg is our recognition that we have things to do, places to go, and what better a time than now, to start moving in that direction. Now the part of the iceberg underneath the water, supporting all that, there has to be a foundation of self-belief, of self-trust. Not only a hardness and understanding that you are not defined by rejection, but also a certainty that things will work out. That you might have to stumble, fall, even aimlessly wander for a set period of time. But when your focus is on a particular North Star and you are serious about it, committed to it, you'll find a way.

And being overlooked in any capacity is not defining because right now is not an end. You decide where the end is. There just so happens to be a lot of space between that point and where you stand now. The vast majority of an iceberg exists under the surface, and that's valuable here. Because I believe that the differentiator when it comes to success and failure is how one internalizes the process and their place within it. If you know you're going to succeed, if you are confident in yourself and who you are, then the little wins and losses along the way tend to mean less.

Getting overlooked in any capacity is a nice little bit of feedback, but in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't hold the weight we tend to give it when we're less sure of ourselves in the process. So let's get back to the quote. The closer you are to the truth, the more silent you become inside. Well, here Naval is stating in one of his podcast episodes that the wiser someone becomes, the more quiet or stoic they become. Referring to the character that I allude to all the time in this podcast,

the loudest person at the table, right? Always talking or seeking attention. Often this character is overcompensating for something. And that's what Naval is, in my opinion, properly stating. But I want to hijack the quote a little bit. Because I think this applies to our own mental chatter as well. When we are sure of ourselves and what we're doing, the internal dialogue is reduced. When we believe ourselves to be correct and in line with our values and our vision, the mind tends to be calmer.

And I can use this YouTube channel and podcast as an easy example. I have self-belief when it comes to my ability to do this. I've invested years and years and believe that over time it's become a strength of mind. So when that inevitable negative feedback or comment comes in, which happens, right? It's the internet. I take it for what it is. It's the tip of the iceberg. I assess whether there's any value to be extracted.

And if there is, I put it in my back pocket. But the point is, I then move on. Because underneath the surface, under that tip of the iceberg, there is such a substantial amount of self-belief and determination in the process, that negativity, it means very little, doesn't define me. And that's the point that I aspire to cling to. And conversely, as counterintuitive as it seems,

I think we should be the same way with positive feedback. Like when nice things are said, it makes us feel good, and we should be grateful, sure. But the idea is the same. Examine, pocket the feedback, and move on, because if we rely too extensively on good feedback for our self-worth and our sense of identity, it's going to be hard to avoid doing the same thing when the other stuff comes in. It's about having a vision and trusting yourself, right?

This is not you versus the world. This is you versus you, and we can't forget that. It's a person committed, determined, on fire in their purpose. collecting data along the way to something greater. And look, sometimes that data comes in the form of being overlooked. It highlights ways you need to make yourself stronger and better. But sometimes it validates and recognizes your greatness, the value you're already adding to the world.

Either way, you're moving forward because it's who you are. And as long as you tell yourself you're going to win, And those two feet underneath you haven't stopped moving. You're putting yourself in position to capitalize on all the opportunity life has to provide. You are going to see the compounding of all those steps you took. The ones you took when it hurt and the ones you took when it didn't. When you were sure and when you weren't, when you had all the energy in the world and when you barely got yourself through.

All those times, they mean something. And it's the ability and desire to move forward regardless that becomes the determining factor. If you know that, the mind can be at peace. Life is happening for you, not to you. The obstacles become much-needed information and the victories further contribute to your momentum. It's all moving you closer to where you need to be.

There's a saying by Steve Martin, he says, be so good they can't ignore you. And that's not a point. It's a process, an evolution. It takes time. It takes patience. It takes self-belief. but trusting that mountaintop you're chasing

also comes with a great sense of security that this epic adventure is yours and yours alone it comes with discovery growth joy sadness and everything in between but it is yours and if you sign that dotted line it doesn't matter if you are overlooked in some capacity No person or external event can take away what you know in your soul to be true. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year?

Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master aesthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories, skin care, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2020. with confidence. Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products or building one from scratch, Dime makes it easy. The work system, our all-in-one best-selling routine, includes a cleanser of your choice, toner, serums, and moisturizers, taking the guesswork out of skin care for your healthiest, happiest skin yet. Dime's commitment to clean ingredients and sustainable

packaging ensures every product is as gentle on your skin as it is on the planet. With thousands of glowing five-star reviews and a loyal community, the result speak for themselves. Revive your skin and give yourself the routine refresh you deserve by visiting dimebeauty.com. That's dime beauty co.com. Your best skin awaits. Around 2011, I hurt my left arm and had to get surgery. So for a while, I was pretty limited as far as what I could do with my upper body. And that's really when I fell in love with running. I started doing it almost every day. Some Sometimes those long runs outside, clear my mind, sort of reset a little bit, and sometimes I mix it up. Hop on the treadmill and do my favorite workout, which was a pyramid, right, where you break 10 minutes into four segments, four, three, two, and one, increasing in intensity with each segment, and then you start over.

And that's where this whole idea comes from. It's this treadmill workout that I want to talk about because there's a little ritual I picked up that I still implement to this day, and it was simple. At the very end of my workout or my run, I would always add 22 seconds. My lucky number twice, two and two.

So, for example, if I told myself, you know, the workout's going to be, you know, three pyramids or 30 minutes, I would stop running at 30 minutes and 22 seconds. And if I told myself it was going to be an hour, I'd stop at one hour in 22 seconds. Always tacking on that 22. And I don't really remember the first time I started doing it or even why. But like so many things that 22-second period organically became a habit,

sort of evolved to take on a life of its own and would come to symbolize for me a little challenge. The idea that the end is never really the end. and no matter how tired I was or how bad I wanted to stop, especially when you can see that finish line in reach, I could always squeeze out a little more. But there's always something extra to give. And you could certainly go down that 22-second rabbit hole, right? Just 22 more seconds.

And then you finish that and you realize you can do just 22 more. And just 22 more. It's like this never-ending spotlight. into how incredible we are as humans. That our stopping points almost always are constructed. Rarely is there not an extra 22 seconds or 22-somethings we can endure. And not only that, I think there's a case to be made that our growth occurs in that final push. There's a ton of value hidden away in there.

the stretching of the mind and body, the last rep that breaks down the muscle, the last few seconds of that run that forced the lungs to work their hardest. Exhausting that last bit of energy and focus, you know, studying for an exam. Maybe that's where you confirm your comprehension and understanding of the subject matter.

It's like when we are pushing ourselves, just outside the limits we drew up, we are simultaneously expanding those limits. And so over the years, I've adopted that mentality. And I look at myself in the mirror now and I can see it. I'm not the same person I was a decade ago. Those little decisions to add on 22 seconds, they stack up, and they stack up in a unique way.

Because it's not necessarily about the time. It's not the same benefit. that say an hour every morning at the gym would bring. Obviously, that would be incredibly valuable, but in a different way, I'm talking about mentally, an armor that we come to wear, an identity that gets materialized.

It's how you see yourself and how you see the world. You understand how manufactured our parameters are. And I get it. We have to stop somewhere, sure. But it's an acknowledgement that those somewheres are fiction. They are arbitrary. You weren't made to exist within them,

but to stretch them, to recreate them. And that's an endeavor that is always uncomfortable. But as far as I can tell, always worth it. The strength to go a little bit further than initially intended or designed is what will place you in a little bit. league of your own. And that's where I wanted to start, by bringing attention to the idea that there's always an extra 22 seconds, and you are always capable of obtaining it. That is yours.

Whether you choose to see it or not, it's an option, it's always an option, which sort of connects us to my next thought. If I know that's who I am, someone that's that fights for that 22 seconds. If I know that's what I'm capable of and that's what lights me up, what about those times in my life when I had no desire to reach for the extra 22? Because sitting here, I can think of plenty.

I can think of times when there was dissonance between my identity and my actions. Here's a quick story. This was a shift in my life and my understanding. standing of reaching for that little bit more, right? When people ask me about my process, right, what I'm building or where I see myself in X number of years, I tell them I'm playing the long game, right? Like, I'll sacrifice some short-term wins now to continue forward with a plan that I believe

wholeheartedly will transform from linear to exponential, right? It's like Gary V's motto, you're young, you have time. And impact is not about succeeding at 34. It's about flourishing at 45 and 55 and 65 and 75. Like, that's fun to me. That's the exciting game to play. And it's methodical. The challenge is, you know, as you're locked into this big picture plan,

you have to pass a lot of shiny objects along the way. A lot of, hey, look at them over there. Maybe I should be doing that too. If that worked for her, will it work for me? Sometimes you forget to trust yourself and stay the course. And so a few years ago, I felt this pressure to pivot, to adjust focus. I'd been talking with some mentors of mine who were very successful in their individual fields and passions. And I thought, hey, you know what, it's time for me to just.

start focusing less on the craft and more on monetizing the craft, right? The De Niro side of things, which is great and it's healthy, but here's the catch. As long as you're doing it in a way that aligns with who you are. And so a few months go by and I found myself living in this overly sized and priced condo on the beach that I was going to use to impress clients. You know, making products that didn't excite me, talking to people. I didn't really want to be talking to, living a life that was not my own, I'd lost myself. Right?

My love is storytelling. It's capturing life's seemingly overlooked secrets. That's what I get excited about in the morning. That's the value I want to share with the world. And look, money is important. It's necessary. It's freedom. But for me, it can't be about the money or I lose the drive.

right and here's here's the point i'm making where it all comes together what i found is that when you're a stranger in your own body there's almost no incentive to push for that little extra it's like who cares about fighting for 22 seconds i'm so misaligned i don't even want to be here right that is the red flag that's the indicator that it's time to adjust because if i'm someone who wants more who pursues an acquires an acquire more and I don't feel the urge to do so you know it's time to change and I broke the lease put everything I had in a car went on a little three-month excursion realigned and if I'm not willing to suffer through that little extra to go above and beyond it's not for me

and so that's a big example but it obviously manifests in smaller ways as well yes you are someone who can and will chase down the beauty in life, who will transform that little extra into something meaningful, but you also have to position yourself and the world around you to make it possible. And when you don't feel that hunger inside, and this is the point you need to understand, it's not you, it's not broken hardware, it's not that you innately lack drive or confidence, It's that you need to rearrange this scenario. You need to find alignment.

Because I promise you, if you want something enough, you'll be willing to fight for it, to hurt for it, to break boundaries for it. But you must first make sure that you're pointed at something you want, something that moves you. And here's the part where I remind you of all those things you've already overcome in your life. Of all the times you thought your tank was empty, but you found a way.

All the times you were hurting but kept moving. All the times you were broken, but put yourself back together. We are not told in school or at work how resilient we are. We're not told that we often stop thousands of 22-second period short. We aren't told that we're living at a 30% capacity operating at a fraction of our potential, we don't even realize the little miracles we've created along the way.

A strong purpose and a willingness to stretch yourself as you pursue it will change your life. And that's not hyperbole, that is fact. If you want what you've never had, then push yourself further than you've ever gone. And we're talking little stressors, expanding one step at a time, until you eventually look over your shoulder

and see the miles you've traveled. Until you look at your reflection and see the evolution that has occurred. It was never just 22 seconds. It was a consistent and sustained shot at the walls you placed around yourself for the opportunity to see them crumble.