Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - Learn To Act As Though NOTHING Hurts You | Powerful Motivational Speeches

Episode Date: May 13, 2024

"Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice." - William Jennings Bryan Monday Motivation Newsletter: https://www.eddiepinero.com/newsletter Free Ebook: www.eddiepinero.com/ebook  YouTube: www.eddiepinero.com/youtube  Explore the power of choice in Eddie Pinero's latest podcast episode. Delve into the concept that everything happens for a reason, but it's our decision to define that reason. Learn how to take control of your outcomes and create your own destiny. Don't miss out on this empowering discussion about the importance of decisive action and the capability to change your reality at any moment.

Everything happens for a reason. That's what they say. But what's not often said is that you get to decide what that reason is. Every occurrence is a tool, only as valuable as its utilization. In other words, as the famous saying goes, it's not what happens.

It's what you choose to do about what happens. A great painter wouldn't let a dollar store painter, and cheap paint get in the way of excellence. No, they'd find a way to transfer their genius to the world. I remember growing up a Red Sox fan. And Boston's one of the toughest environments for athletes to play in. Just because of the pressure of the city, the media, the fans,

every pitch is scrutinized. There's a very... The expectations are high. expectations are high there, sometimes even unrealistic, you know, and that was the situation, that was the reality. And I remember seeing players join the team, and some of them would just light up. They would thrive in that environment where every pitch is watched, you know, every game is talked about.

They'd show up and they'd feed off the energy. And then there'd be some players that would fold like a lawn chair. The pressure was too much. Players that, by the way, were stars in other cities. Another way of saying, you know, same situation, same resources, different outcomes. Different players built different realities with what was at hand. And that's one example of many I could give, right? But the idea here, if you think big picture, is that life is an infinite assortment of tools.

It's not provided to you pre-assembled. It's there for you to build. Reality is your responsibility. You've just been handed supplies. End of a relationship. You're sad. I've been there. We've all been there, right?

So what are you going to do about it? What are you going to make with it? And that might seem insensitive, disheartening, even impossible while you're going through it. But if you want to build something precious from the pieces that remain, you can. As crazy as that might seem amidst the storm, you can. You can take what you've learned, you can pick your chin up, you can find out in the world what you thought you already had.

Or let's say you had an opportunity of some sort fall through the cracks, and you wanted this opportunity. You wanted it bad. You thought the deal was sealed, the reality's different, it's gone. missed it, swing in a miss. So what now? Again, same question. What will you build a statue to remind yourself that you're not good enough?

Or a bridge to the next thing? Will you allow that disappointment to become armor that you wear? And that's exactly what it is. It's like you just, you lost, you know, you scuffed your knees, Maybe your ego's hurt, your pride's hurt. You told people great things were going to happen and they didn't. Well, you look to your left, look to your right. Maybe you realize, hey, I'm still here.

Life is still going on. Maybe worst case is not that bad. And maybe I can take that knowledge and that confidence onto the next thing. Maybe I can be a little bolder. Live with a greater sense of curiosity. Be more determined in my exploration. Everything happens for a reason. So why not manufacture the best reasons?

Everything happens for a reason. So why not reason your way into that ending that's meaningful? I point to 26 as the age I learned that I can choose my own outcomes, create my own reasons. Because prior to that, it was, you know, this is the hand I'm dealt, so this is what I'm supposed to do. This is how life is supposed to happen, but there are no supposed tos, none, zero. There's what you choose to build with what you have.

And by the way, indecision is also a decision. Not doing anything at all is often the same thing as building a cage around yourself. Let that news hit you like the miracle that it is. Sure, it's tough, it's humbling. but the truth is everything around you, what you call reality you've chosen. You've allowed to exist the way it is, and you're capable of changing that at any moment, redefining the quote-unquote reason. So perhaps it's not as much that everything happens for a reason,

as much as it is that everything happens. The reason is entirely up to you. in this episode was inspired by some background music. The very music playing behind my words right now, actually. I have this thing for acoustic tracks. I just feel like they completely change the dynamic of a story. But I digress. I was writing earlier, opened my notes, found a topic I wanted to discuss, spent about two hours on it. But as I listened to this song, and looked over my words. I just felt like what I'd written didn't do it justice.

Do you know that feeling where maybe it's your work or any other aspect of life really, where you know what you have is good enough, like no question, good enough to get by, maybe even better than average? But at the same time, you have this little voice in your head almost guilt because you know there is within you something better. something better. Like sure this will get you through the gate, but you just know you're conceding something. And it's that curiosity, that question, what could I have created and given to the world that just pulled me in a little deeper? I was recently in Cincinnati, one of my oldest friends,

Mike. We met in fourth grade, and we've been in touch ever since. And we were having dinner talking about how we were always in trouble back in the day. And I mean, we were always in trouble as kids. Went to a little Catholic school in Southern California. And the way they disciplined us back then was they had this system where if you were talking when you shouldn't be, you'd get a T for talking. And that T basically counted as one strike.

If you did something besides talking that was inappropriate, you'd get an I, which I presume is for inappropriate. And eyes counted as two strikes. And we couldn't really remember what the system was completely, but I think we landed on, you know, if you got up to seven total strikes before the end of the week, you'd get a note sent home to your parents.

And we were going back and forth, kind of disagreeing on the effectiveness of that system. You know, the classic carrot versus stick argument. You know, Mike thinks it was, a great system and certainly there was a lot of value there. You know, it kept us in check to an extent. But I saw it differently in the sense that all it did at times was rearrange incentives.

You know, like if it's Friday afternoon and I'm sitting there, I only have one T for the week. You bet the teacher turns around. I'm throwing that apple-shaped stress ball right at the back of Mike's head. You know, I've earned myself a little breathing room over the course of the week. Why not do just enough to avoid that

that note going home to Mrs. P. It just seems like looking back now, that a reward-based system might have been more beneficial. Instead of tiptoeing around and manipulating the rules so that we could avoid those negative outcomes, why not learn to aim to reach for more, right, for the positive outcome? And here's why I'm going down this rabbit hole,

because I know this seems trivial, but here's the honest truth. It took me into my mid-20s to unlearn this in even the most basic sense. Certainly not just because of my elementary school. It's how we're all raised, right? To avoid the negative. To do enough to avoid punishment or embarrassment.

It's not about mountaintops. It's about dodging the T's in the eyes, learning and manipulating this system to get what we need so that we have just enough. You know, and as an adult, I'm not talking merely finances here. I'm talking relationships. I'm talking health. I'm talking all aspects of life.

Right, that little voice that we all have, we all know it. The one that said to me two hours ago, yeah, this speech is fine. You'll avoid missing your deadline. You'll feel like you got everything done on schedule today. You won't have to call your editor or postpone anything. But like, how good do you feel about it? Because you're capable of more. This is good, but somewhere behind that curtain, there is great.

No, I'm not saying this episode is going to be, you know, third in history behind King's I of a Dream speech in the Gettysburg Address. But the message means something to me. It means everything to me. The ability to leave good in pursuit of great changed my life. And most of the time, not even in the larger than life sense, I'm talking about the little things. I'm talking about the courage to walk away when I had to. To fight for more when I felt slighted. To get out of bed when I felt like my ego was crushed.

In a world where we're conditioned to find and settle for adequate, that little perspective shift lit a fire in my soul. which honestly, if anything, just makes life more fun, more exciting, more impactful. When you feel like you're generating meaning in your own life, it puts color into the mundane. And that's the message that I want to leave you with. When you hear that little whisper in your soul, that question, is this your best? Is this who you want to be? Is it where you want to be?

Why not entertain it? Dive into the curiosity, walk through the door and see what lives on the other side. At worst case, the decision's reversible as most are, and you backtrack to the start and repeat the cycle. But at best case, life opens up. And sometimes it's a hard conversation to have with yourself. No question. Sometimes it hurts being that vulnerable with the person in the mirror. But your soundtrack deserves a story that matters to you.

And you don't find meaning running from the T's and the eyes. You don't find contentment hiding in the shadows of life. You arrive where you're supposed to be by following that curiosity straight into an evolved version of yourself. By listening when the voice asks, Is this where you were meant to be? Just imagine if we implemented into our lives, all those things we already knew would make us better. Imagine if we became masters, not just of knowing,

but of transforming knowledge into motion. A friend of mine, Tyler, will reach out every once in a while, after listening to one of the episodes, and we'll just kind of riff back and forth on the content, chat about the overlaps, the differences. Most importantly, you know, how we can each in our own world be a little better, happier, and healthier.

Tyler recently built and sold a tech company and is now transitioning into a new chapter of his life. And in essence, starting over, which is something I can. I can in many ways relate to. And this morning I got a voice note and said, man, imagine if we implemented wholeheartedly the things we knew to be true. Imagine if we could execute for ourselves with the same advice

that's so obvious when looking out at the world, at others. And I thought, oh man, as someone who spent a decade thinking and philosophizing about this stuff, this is a very real and valuable question. Not only that, sort of comes at a perfect time. And here's why. Those of you have been listening to the channel or podcast for a long time, you know this for me has been one great adventure. Documentation of a journey.

Starting with the first video I ever released, owed to excellence, which was essentially me promising myself just to give this creator thing a try and I'd go back to what I knew to be here. safe. To videos like running in the rain where I discuss my coming to understand the value of identifying as a person who does the hard thing. To speeches like make you proud, where all I'm really doing is during hard times assuring myself that things will be fine. To more recently,

we're sure I'm finally seeing some of that growth and 10 years of effort compounding, but now grappling with brand new challenges. Since day one, I've been coaching myself through the ups and the downs, but what are these stories? What do they provide for me, or for those who listen to them? Well, in a sense, they're the lessons learned. They paint a portrait of the ideal. They're merely information. Yes, life gives you more when you ask more of life.

And yes, discomfort is often the cost of admission. Yes, you can get through life's greatest storms if you take it one step at a time. And yes, the challenges we face evolve and the context changes, but we are equipped to confront and handle them. Guess what though? None of that information matters if we don't act on. If we're not using the past to recreate the present, those stories are my map. that even the best map in the world is meaningless unless it's being utilized.

And Tyler's very simple and direct question was valuable to me in that it did two things. First it made me think, Eddie, look back at your journey. Look what you've overcome, right? In a number of ways you've learned, you know what needs to now be done. And simultaneously prompted me to ask. And so now, this very moment, what are you doing about it? I love the lesson. I think there's art in our struggle and beauty in the overcoming of our suffering.

But if all those lessons, if the ideal remains stagnant like a caged bird, what's the point? That wisdom must be set free, and that only happens with the targeted, deliberate, effort. I felt this sense of excitement, invigoration in asking myself, how can I highlight the doing? Where can those wheels hit the road faster? How can I delve further into those very epiphanies I love to explore? Something that I'm encountering now that's both fun and challenging is the transformation from, I mean, really being a solo creator, speaking, writing, producing, in his studio to seeing the process as a business owner, to building a support structure and systematizing workflows.

As a friend has said to me before, a little less Mickey Mouse in order to be a little more Walt Disney. And it's happening, but the truth is, right, you don't get where you're going the same way you arrived where you are. So how can the old lessons be turned into action now? Knowing my world changes the second I decide to act, It's like having an unused arsenal at my disposal. Knowing my foot is barely touching the pedal is power.

And we can all focus on that actualization of our knowledge. We can all ask, what's one thing I can do today that I need to, I know that I need to, that perhaps I wouldn't have, but didn't give myself a little push. I love the idea of that simple diagram, where you draw a line straight down a page, and on the left side you're listing your current obstacle, the things that are really bothering you,

or the reasons you're stuck, and then on the right, one single thing you're going to do about it. All it does is reinforce action, and action is everything. Because to Tyler's point, you know, I really know what needs to be done. We all really know what needs to be done. Not how things will end, or maybe what the finish line looks like, but we know now we have a gut sense of what we need to do, and where the opportunity lies.

We're aware. We understand. So a world where we become masters of doing is a world where we transform beyond our wildest imagination. And the things I talk about, they can ultimately in my life become everything or wither away into nothing.

They can sit there as a supposed to, an ideal. And ultimately, a I wish I did. All that depends on what I do with it and how I choose to act when I'm uncomfortable, moving into a new space. The same can be said for anyone listening to this. You're equipped with at least a starting point. You probably know what you don't like. You're probably aware of some things that must be eliminated or left behind. But knowing that is only as good as your first step. So are you willing to partake in the doing? In taking the little pieces of wisdom and breathing life into them by walking out your front door, by looking in the mirror,

entrusting in your ability to adapt, to change, to grow in a world of complexity, let's simplify. We know what must be done, so let's focus on the doing. And on the journey, if we misstep or miss the mark, adjust and move again. Because we know there's nothing more tragic than doing nothing at all. I do something today that takes an axe to the tree of stagnation. Not everything, but one thing. When you are in motion, that world seems to conform, to rearrange around you, so here's to giving life the opportunity to make that happen, to giving yourself the opportunity to experience it. As Tyler stated, just imagine if we implemented wholeheartedly the things we knew to be true.

Not kind of, or sort of, but with the same or greater intensity, and in many cases intentionality, it took to acquire the knowledge. What would that look like? Let's move now. Let's swing away. Let's uncover that world where your lessons translate to feet on the pavement and reality in the palm of your hand. Find something to make yours. I connect every few months with some of my good friends to strategize, kind of reflect back on the previous quarter plan for the new one with each of our businesses, kind of share ideas, stuff like that.

And I was chatting with my friend Keith about life before he found success in what he's doing now, the struggle and the turbulence he faced, as well as ultimately his decision, and that's entirely what it was, to turn things around. And I've talked about his backstory before, so I'm not going to get too much into it, but essentially he grew up in a very negative environment. Dealt with a ton of adversity, but got through it. started his own national business installing and repairing commercial pizza ovens and the guys just crushed. And, you know, our conversation in that moment wasn't so much about the doing. It was more on the overcoming and how mentally we had to recreate ourselves to have any chance of moving beyond what we knew. I've talked about it a little before.

Kids are simply not taught in school how to thrive, how to build, how to ask more of themselves. in the world, they're taught to follow instructions, to do what they need to do in order to pass the exam, to progress to the next level. Then there's a gray area, because I'm not saying this is totally valueless, but I am saying that anything beyond that requires a reworking of sorts. You ask anyone who stepped out of that cycle, and they'll tell you the mental and psychological shift that needed to take place. It was almost overwhelming, right? It's a lot, but it's imperative. I recently looked up the word entrepreneurship, and this is the definition.

The activity of setting up a business or businesses taking on financial risk in the hope of profit. And in my mind, it is the risk precisely that's challenging, that brings us so much pain, but also contains within it the reward. It's one of the craziest dilemmas we feel. face. You know, you'll have to endure some of the worst times of your life, but because of that, you'll get to experience highs that would otherwise have been almost completely improbable. We have to rework the thinking that says discomfort equals run away. It's like, no, discomfort equals the price of something better, and sure it's by no means

mandatory, but it's where the upside lives. You have to train yourself to step out into the chaos with the expectation of taming it. And yeah, everything could go wrong, but also everything could go right. And just imagine. Imagine what that would look like. That possibility alone validates the risk. We just need to convince ourselves. And that risk, by the way, is not just financial. In fact, most of the time it's not. It takes a variety of shapes in our lives. You run the rate. you risk losing you go up and talk to the girl you risk rejection you pick up and move somewhere new you risk winding up somewhere you don't want to be and maybe

temporarily things do fall apart but maybe you win the race maybe you find the love of your life maybe you relocate to the happiest place you've ever called home calculated risk is the beginning of everything that matters And so back to the Congo. We were talking about the different risks we've taken, how some chapters were fun, some were challenging, and some were both, and how for me there was even from time to time a conversation where I was asking myself whether it was really worth it.

You know, when you're uncomfortable, the mind wants to do one thing, get rid of the discomfort. And I had to convince myself, remind myself that I'm someone who risks, who risks good to pursue great. Risk hurts. And somewhere in that conversation was when Keith said he remembers the exact point the risk became worth it. The discomfort became easier to manage. We're so used to taking orders to playing scared that the incentive just wasn't there until Keith's words, it became mine. The most invigorating thing he ever did was find a pursuit to call his own. That's powerful. His business injected him with a new energy and in essence

a new life because he suddenly had a stake in the game. And I think that's what so many of us in so many areas are missing. The risk appears bigger when it's not counterbalanced by something meaningful. So find something to make yours. The simplicity there is beautiful. Complex ideas expressed in simple ways are always worth holding on to. We are programmed to lose because we are programmed to live according to someone else's standard, to think small, to ask ourselves how do we not screw up? But when you can step outside that little self-imposed circle and instead ask yourself, what's something I can create that is my own, something I care about, that I can nurture,

invest a part of me into, that's when life really starts. paying dividend. You're not existing, you're living. Or as I've recently discussed, you're empowering yourself to not just sit in the room, but be in the room fully. I use entrepreneurship as the model for this discussion because that's been such a huge part of my life, where I've been injecting my time and attention and yeah, risk. But the point is not that everyone needs to stop what they're doing and become an entrepreneur. That's one path of many. Obviously. The point is that there is a risk-reward dynamic in entrepreneurship that we should all understand, extract and inject into our own lives where it best applies. We've learned to settle in so many ways that we must know there is tremendous value in asking, what is it in my life I want to invest in?

make mine give myself the opportunity to experience the excitement of defining the things I care about and watching them grow right whether your current arena is entrepreneurship or motherhood fatherhood academics a particular relationship some combination of these or anything else to make magic out of the mundane requires we first make it ours we take ownership responsibility for the journey we accept the risk and chase down the rewards. You can do amazing things when you realize what you're capable of and commit to its manifestation.

So in a world where yes, we are conditioned to fail, step out from those subtle shackles of learned helplessness. You are anything but helpless. It's just that you've yet to reach out and pull your dreams into your orbit. You've yet to put a stake in the ground and say this matters and it's time to see it through. Because once you do that, the good stuff begins. I wouldn't make excuses for you. I wouldn't look you in the eye and tell you everything is great when in actuality the wheels are falling off the wagon.

No, I'd point to the insufficiencies and remind you that you're capable of chipping away at them. shipping away at them. I think that pragmatism can save someone's life. But guess what? Being human is knowing there are things you don't know. Realizing that growth is picking up little understandings along the way and bringing them with you into the future. Allowing them into the evolution that is you. And part of my personal evolution was coming face to face with the fact that looking forward isn't all of it. It's part of it. Yeah, we need to be better, of course.

Yeah, we can always squeeze more value out of the time allotted to us. 100%. This forward progression, as far as I'm concerned, is intertwined in human fulfillment. But we are, in this moment, the manifestation of the obstacles we've already overcome. overcome. We are the times we wanted to stop and didn't. We are the losses we bounce back from and the adversity we forged into opportunity. We're the endings that we melted down into beautiful beginnings. We are the mistakes, the obstacles, the little encounters with hell that didn't define us, but instead changed. us. And that matters. So quick story time. For about five years after I graduated college, some of my friends and I have this fantasy baseball league we'd used to stay in touch, right? And I think

even they would begrudgingly admit that I was oddly good at it. I won like three or four out of the five years or something like that. And you know what my strategy was? It was simple. I picked players based on who they were over the course of their career. not based on how they performed last year, which is a trap people seem to fall into. Right? So a guy that hits 30 home runs six years in a row, and then last year suddenly only hits seven, it's not out of the question to think he'll hit 30 again, revert back to the mean, to his average, his track record. That to me is more meaningful than some recent struggle, and I took that bet every time. Now, as you can imagine, the point I'm making here has nothing to do with baseball.

It has everything to do with life in general. So much of the time, we completely focus on the current insufficiencies. The bad things happening now, the misfortunes in our lives, we're striking out, and our brain goes into panic mode. It says gap, gap, gap, how do we fill it? And again, yes, that's important. And our plan for resurgence is necessary. We can't forget who we are and what we've done.

We can't overlook our track record. As the saying goes, you've survived 100% of the bad days. You've lived through countless struggles. You've climbed out of many catastrophes, at least I have. And it seems as though it's when we need that reassurance most that we are most inclined to forget. It's when we more than any other time need to prove to ourselves that we are unconquerable, that we question our ability to persevere. I'd never say to you the road ahead will be easy.

I'm not saying it won't suck at times. I'm not saying it won't take all of you. I'm merely saying that you are equipped to emerge victorious, to handle not some of it, but all of it. I'm saying that the person in the mirror is stronger than you can even imagine. But understand, you're not operating on blind faith here. You're not hoping for some miracle. You're operating on your own record of success.

What you do is find a way. What you do is when you don't believe me, look over your shoulder. Take a trip down memory lane. Glancing. back at all the mountains you've already climbed. And life, it won't be smooth sailing all the time. You'll have your slumps and your adversity. No question.

But they're not you. They are what you were made to navigate. Everything has brought you to this point. And it's great to focus on this point, but don't lose the everything. Sometimes it's not about who you will be, someday. Sometimes it's about what you've already become. It's about who you are now.