Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - PROVE EVERYONE WRONG | Powerful Motivational Speeches | Wake Up Positive

Episode Date: December 7, 2022

"If you need someone to believe in, start with yourself" - Unknown 

I think a substantial amount of life comes down to self-trust, to believing in yourself. But here's the thing, it's not blind belief. It's not toxic positivity where you close your eyes, cross your fingers, shut the world off, and just assume things will work out because you're entitled to a great result. No, what I'm referring to is an active and deliberate trusting of yourself to learn, to make the necessary adjustments, and to keep moving forward. When we have faith in our ability to step forward and improve simultaneously, there is no defeat. When you know you won't stop until you land where you want to land, then limitations become a choice. success in any capacity is a you thing, not an outside thing.

And this popped into my head a few days ago during, of all things, a game of axe throwing. So, quick story from last weekend, a friend of mine and I, after a day of working on the podcast, went down to Fort Lauderdale to this axe throwing place, which is, it's random, but it's a great time, simple concept. There's this giant target and you take turns throwing little axes at the target, basically darts, right? If you think along those lines. And there were eight of us in the group. They divide you into two teams of four and you play various games until the end. The end, there's this final session where it's every person for themselves. It's like a free-for-all.

Each person gets three rounds to throw out. axes at the target and whoever has the best score wins. So think of the target just in a traditional way, right? The bullseye or the little point in the middle is worth five. Then the next smallest circle outside of that is four. Then three, then two, and then the biggest circle along the edge is worth one. Right? So whatever you hit with the axe, that's the point you get.

Except they put these two little blue dots. on the top third of the circle. And they say if you can hit one of these blue dots, you get 10 points. So high risk, but certainly high reward. And my friend and I, super competitive, right? He looks at me, starts telling me how he's already got this in the bag, and I'm like, all right, we'll see.

And it's been arguable, but I probably had been the more consistent of both of us up to that point in the night. Nothing fancy, just straight away aiming at the middle, aiming for those bullseyes and fours. Not even attempting to go for those, you know, hard-to-reach blue dots. No need straight up the middle. And here's why this is important.

We step out to take our first shots of the finale here. My friend goes first, immediately hits one of those little blue dots. Boom, already, I'm down 10 points. So what do I do? I completely leave my strategy. And I started thinking, no, I'm behind, I can't let this happen. I spent my next nine shots, and the only nine shots I had, right, trying to hit those blue dots and missing every time, just get killed, right? He won handedly.

And then I realized when the scores were read out at the end, that if I just ignored everything my buddy had done and stayed true to my game, aimed for the center of the board, average 3.5. or four points of throw, I would have won, and by a substantial margin. But I let the outside world impact my strategy. I started chasing those long-shot blue dots when I knew they were a distraction. Now, I'm sure the last thing you expected to hear today was the recap of an axe-throwing contest. But if you bear with me, there's value here, right? So let's step beyond the axe throwing. Let's take it up a level.

Let's talk about when you know what's best for you. You know where you want to be and what's working, but you're pulled out of your lane because of what someone else says or does. You hear him or her over there accomplish something great. You look in the mirror and go, man, I haven't accomplished anything like that. Maybe I need to change what I'm doing. my approach, maybe I'm wrong. See, and the beauty of that little game

was that it reminded me that there will always be outside circumstances trying to redirect my course. But we have to trust in ourselves that we are doing what's best. We have to know our own game and our own strengths. Now, don't conflate this with the stubbornness. It's not about never adjusting. No, we need to adjust.

But adjust when it's best, for you, not simply because other people are taking a different approach. It's hard to stay consistent with the world pushing other options consistently, right? People finding success in various ways, taking other paths, talking about their incredible strategies and how great X, Y and Z is. But it's all noise. You have to trust you. And again, not blind faith, but an understanding of who you are and a willing to be. and a willingness to continue to grow with every step forward.

There has to be some element of understanding that, sure, things will get challenging, life will push back. But that doesn't mean you are wrong or in over your head. It's a compounding of little actions and trust in yourself. If you can do that, the world remains yours. It's day by day, or not. my example, throw by throw, knowing your bull's eye and aiming steady up the middle. We all know how hard it is to see results before they exist. The mind tries to find every

example out there depicting why you're wrong, why the finish line is too far away. Life is constantly creating off-ramps, saying, hey, if you don't want it that bad or you're unsure of yourself, here's a way out, come with me. It's constantly sowing seeds of doubt, which is why we must dig deep for that strength. Life is a game of you versus you. If those around you win, good for them. And if they lose, well, hey, wish them well, hey, wish them well on the next go-around. But none of it has any bearing on who you are and the race you're running. Are you, going to show up for you? Are you going to be your biggest fan when it takes every single part of you to keep going? Don't let the loudest voices in the room dissuay you from what you know to be right.

Don't let the blue dots hinder your direct line to the bull's eye, right? Block out that noise, block out the distractions and do what is required of you. Win your right. Win your right. You're going to race because that's the only finish line of value. Walk your path because that will bring you where you need to be. And when you question the pursuit, remember what you've overcome all the steps that brought you to right now and how, yeah, maybe they weren't flashier over the top, but they were consistent. They've given life to the present moment. What you do is succeed. What you do is overcome. Just don't lose your bullseye. Why is this battle you versus you? With all the complexity, all the obstacles out there, why are you your greatest opponent? Well, to put it simply,

because all those obstacles and all that complexity still can't tell you no. They can't say enough is enough, they can't look back at you and say let's just settle for what we have now. No, only you can do that. The world may create the landscape. It may construct the terrain and those obstacles. But you are the sole decider on where along the way you stop. You decide how far you want to go and how much you are willing to endure. When it comes to your advancement or limitation, you are in the drivers.

I just picked up a copy of Will Smith's recent book, and one of the ideas that stood out to me was resilient. And this part in the book, it's actually kind of uncomfortable to get through, but incredibly powerful. He's talking about his childhood and the polarity of his father's personality. A man who would do anything to provide for his family, he took pride in that and saw it as his primary responsibility, but simultaneously was their greatest source of pain. And he mentions his father, you know, hitting his mother from time to time. In one particular example, struck his mother in the face so hard that it knocked her on the floor.

And as she stood back up, she said something along the lines of, you can hit me, but you can't hurt me. And that was the first time Will understood as a child, the difference between what the outside world inflicts upon us and how we choose to react to that occurrence. That understanding is power. That's why you are the author of your story. In this sense that every single thing dropped at your feet,

Every situation, every occurrence, they come with an implicit question attached. A question that you and only you are responsible for answering. The question is, what does this mean? And how you respond to that question determines whether you go left or right at that metaphorical fork in the road. Does the occurrence detract from your ambitions or is it a multiplier? Does it confirm your doubts and insecurities, or is it your reason to rise to the occasion? An opportunity to stretch, to evolve. That's a gift.

That's an invite. Not some sort of divine punishment. But the challenge is removing the layers until you arrive at the value. And it's hard. But you get there by saying yes. You get there by choosing to see the value. And here's a quick example. My favorite thing about athletics, which was for me a ton of running.

Now I throw more interval training in there, but the same concepts apply. It's a chance to remind myself that I don't negotiate with my weakness. I don't give myself an opportunity to rationalize with the voice that wants me to that question, that fork in the road, I answered it. I charted its course before the workout started. Knowing this is going to be uncomfortable at times, but it's where I need to go. There will be no more thinking from here on out.

So today's workout, for example, switching deadlifts, burpees, to squats, to core, you don't think. You see the next requirement. the next task and you simply say, yes, you don't need your mind for this. In fact, you go before your mind even knows where it's going. Because that dotted line has already been signed. And that was the breakthrough for me. When you separate what you have to do with the hurt associated with doing that thing,

you free yourself. After all, what's there to hold you back if you can't talk yourself, out of doing things. See, we tend to think our greatest adversity is the pain or the confusion or the unknown. But it's like, no, those are the byproducts of doing anything of significance. The adversary is the voice that begs you to slow down

because of those things. And if you can figure out in your own life how to create space between the two, how to separate the task and the discomfort often brought about by the task, there's nothing that will ever be able to slow you down. And look, I'm not saying that you walk around without ever utilizing the power of that brilliant mind you possess.

The one's ability to think is everything. But what I am saying is there is a time to shut it off. There is a time in which to avoid overthinking we simplify. Action, reaction. One more mile, okay, end of story. One minute of jump squats next, Roger that, period. It's taking the emotion out of the process, refusing to leave the door cracked for the inner dialogue that says,

hey, maybe you don't do this, maybe you slow down, are you sure you can handle what's next? No, all of that is tuned out. It's assignment, go, next go, next go, next go. You know this is the right thing. You did your thinking before grabbing the sword, shield, and stepping into the arena. Now guess what? It's instinct. It's doing what has to be done. And what has to be done hurts.

And look, you didn't have to accept that. You didn't have to step in. You could have stayed home. But somewhere along the way, you looked in the mirror and said, The difficult path is the one with the value. And now here you are. Face to face with hungry lions. Clashing swords with your adversaries.

There's no turning back now. Now is when you parse out pain from the objective. The pain is now part of the audience. It's not with you or in you. It's watching from above. as you do what you came here to do. So yes, those swords clash, but the eyes remain focused on what's ahead. And yes, those lions roar, but that's background noise.

When you simplify your world into objective and action, objective, action, objective, action, there is time for nothing but forward progress. And sometimes that is all that is required of us. In the face of adversity, in the face of pain, self-doubt, in the face of discomfort, can you break your world down into nothing but one single step forward? One more set, one more rep, one more session, one more attempt, just one more. No rocket science. No negotiation. There's nothing to figure out here.

It's walking the path before you. It's the discipline to carry on. It's one more swing of the axe. Audience or no audience. Lions are no lions. You are bound to the universe at your feet. And that simplified concentration is why you will succeed. What are you willing to endure? Because to become something more is not to react to the world, but to create a new one, yours. As my dad explained to me when I was in grade school, it's taking initiative, seeing what isn't there, what's needed, and then making it happen. And while the setting certainly change, the situation is no longer about helping around the house so I could go to the concert with

my friends. Right now, as we get older, our world seems to get bigger along with us. The stakes are higher. Now it's everything I see when I open the blinds and I look out that window. It's all there. And we can have as little or as much of that as we want. But what we receive will always be directly proportional to what we're willing to endure. To how long we push forward before results arrive. How long we can carry on with the sole company of our beliefs. It's about Bezos packaging and delivering his own books from a garage. Knowing it's not about today, it's about tomorrow if he can just hang on, if he can just endure. It's Tony Robbins with $20 in his bank account, knowing that has no reflection on him or what he's capable of.

If he can just hang on, just keep pushing. It's not that they have the ability to bring their dreams to life. A lot of people do. They had more, they had patience, they had the discipline, right, to remain calm and collected. That's nerve-wracking. That can be unsettling. They had the ability to be focused to remove all the noise around them. The doubt that stops people before that desired payout is achieved. And one of my favorite ways to look at this concept of growth is a little anecdote about lilypads

in a pond. And basically it's posed as a question, right? So the lily pads in this pond double in size every day. And by day 30, the pond is completely covered in lily pads. So then what day is it half covered? That's the question. A lot of people, you know, instinctually, they say, oh, okay, day 30, half of 30 is 15. So on day 15, it was half covered, but that's wrong. They're doubling every day, which means the pond wasn't half covered until day 29, and only a quarter covered on day 28. And the reason that's important is because that means on day 1 through 27. Those lily pads were growing, they were working, they were moving, yet they occupied less

than a quarter of that pond. All that work for a result that was barely visible. And then at the very end, right, the payout becomes exponential, and that's what success is. That's what it means to pursue anything of significance. It's days, months, years of unrecognized work, of marching forward, covering ground when no one knows or cares or believes, except you. That visualization is your sweet spot, but like we all know, easier said than done. Easier said than done, right? This is an incredibly challenging thing because we get impatient,

and our pride starts to hurt. We become tempted to jump to something different or easier. We don't hang on long enough to hit day 28 or 29 or 30. When things really start to evolve. It's like James Clears metaphor in atomic habits, right? Where you have an ice cube sitting in a room and it's freezing and you start slowly shifting the temperature up. You don't see anything going on with the ice cube.

Not until you hit that 32 degree mark. But there are things happening when it goes from 26 to 27 degrees and 27 to 28 and 28 to 29. Those little molecules are moving and bouncing around. But then boom, suddenly it hits that mark and it changes rapidly right in front of you. That's why this single shift in perspective changes everything. It's not about right now. about right now you're doing this for the exponential growth to come you're believing you're laying the ground work until what I call the overnight success period when

the world finally recognizes and goes who is this wow that was quick but they have no idea about you know day one through 27 they don't know about the the effort and the mental gymnastics they don't know how many times you had to talk yourself out of quitting or out of rationalizing a day off they just don't know the road you took to get there and that's fine. In fact, that's the beauty of it all. You not only saw it first, but you brought something beautiful to life. By enduring turmoil, by navigating discomfort and chaos, you would become the maker of a new universe, your universe. Because you stood there because when others would have ran, turned back, you endured.

There's a saying that in order to become something new, you have to leave something behind. You have to detach in some capacity, remove yourself from the physical realm, because the obstacles that we face are not physical. 99% of our problems are not physical. They're mental. And as you sort of drive that metaphorical ship into the horizon, the biggest turn is never going to be the anchor, or the headwind or the bowline.

No, it's going to be the storyline. It's going to be the narrative of the person navigating that ship. And it's interesting, because our first inclination, when we feel stuck, it's always to point out, attribute our problems to the world in this predetermined position within it. Maybe that's the issue. We take our power.

We put it into the universe, cross our fingers, and hope things work out. But that will always be a losing proposition. It will always come crumbling down. Because it's not the world that keeps you from showing up. You're not physically incapable of taking that first step or growing or evolving, developing, becoming something new,

know that demon lives in your head. That's the mental Goliath we struggle with. Right? Because there's cognitive dissonance between who we know ourselves to be and who we want ourselves to be. That's the sea we have to cross, the terrain we have to navigate. It's not the physicality of taking the steps.

Anyone can do that. It's believing that you are working. of the journey, then you have to ask yourself, is it that you can't become something new, or is it that you can't, won't refuse to detach from who you used to be? You're still tucked away in that container, that box you've been building for years,

in years, in years that you've placed yourself in, because I can promise you. One of the most liberating things that you're Liberating things to understand is yesterday is not a life sentence. Yesterday's not forever. Yesterday's not defining. It's simply a stepping stone. And every morning when you open your eyes, sun comes through the window,

illuminates life around you. That's never your cue to put on a fake smile. Play the same role you've been playing day after day after day. No, it's an invitation to do anything you want to do. To begin again. To start fresh. It's an opportunity to detach from that character. Detach from the people and the things that don't push you towards what you want.

Detach from the negative self-talk. And when all that's gone, everything is removed and it's only you and your self-belief, a will to move forward. I promise you that pension. shifts. Life becomes simple and how beautiful simplicity is. It's shining a spotlight on what matters. It's clarity. It's taking control. It's picking up the clay and molding what you want to mold. It's opening the door and deciding to walk through. Everything else is variable. Everything else is noise. Everything else is detail and distraction. Because what you want, it's very,

there and it's waiting for you to simply remove yourself from who you used to be to step into right now and believe that you are worthy of everything else. Human beings don't see we interpret. We don't take in what happened. We take in the implication of what happens. Everything in our world is story. Similar to the idea of two ideologically different news organizations, right, reporting on the same event. Neither will be completely factual. They'll both uphold their individual narratives. They're not black and white. They're interpreting gray space. And our individual lives are no different. We are our own broadcasting channels. Using data to support our individual narratives. See, we know what the story's going to say before the story occurs.

because we will make it so. We'll make life fit our beliefs. That's what means to be human. So here's where the value lives in the context of this message when we find ourselves in a consistent state of despair or frustration or anxiety. It's a fool's errand to look for solutions in the external world. Because everything we find, everything we come across, will support our current beliefs, our current story. That's what we'll keep playing in our heads, and it's why money can't bring fulfillment,

and another person can't take you from incomplete to content. It's why status will never equate to happiness. Those acquisitions are like putting premium fuel in a car with a broken engine. It's just not the answer that we hoped it would be. To change your world, you must change your story. Whatever it is that needs to be changed. The location, the objective, the characters, maybe the journey altogether, but it's the neural network behind your eyes that must change,

not the detail it takes in. And so if you feel stuck or feel like where you want to be seems unrealistic, you have to know right now that the very fact you think that way is the problem. So ask yourself, not your girlfriend or your boss or your neighbor,

but ask yourself what a turnaround looks like. Do you know? Or have you acclimated to being unhappy? Have you even asked yourself what happiness looks like? Or is your personal broadcasting channel so hell-bent on ensuring your life outlook stays the way it is that it's not even paying attention to the data it takes in.

See, I believe wholeheartedly that the first step in any facet of transformation is remembering that you have control, that things in your life that bring you down or hold you back can be changed. In fact, the very things working against you can work for you, but you have to be aware. You have to think about it. Now, I'm not a believer in magic, right? I don't think you sit back, say, I don't want to be unhappy ever again, snap your fingers and smile until the end of eternity. But I do believe that once we're aware of our manufactured shackles

and our self-imposed limitation, we can start chipping away, doing the one, two, or three small things every day, tiny swings at the tree until it falls. Right? If it's, I'm not happy with my work life, well, what does a better situation look like? What bridge is that gap? I'll wake up 20 minutes earlier on weekdays and master Microsoft Excel. I'll send one message on LinkedIn asking an expert about the field I want to move into.

I'll read 20 pages a day in a book related to business. You think those things are small? See what they look like compounded in a year. Not only that. This is the most important part. You are taking the power back. You're taking control. And that's what feels good.

That's where we get our identity. You get a little disappointed at how you've let your physique slip when you look in the mirror. Don't be sad about it every day. Again, ask yourself what the inverse looks like and start doing small things. Subtract one sports drink and add one green smoothie. Double your water intake. Do a 10-minute daily workout on YouTube. Like the pieces are out there.

And to find yourself again is to realize that they're out there. Realize that you're playing a movie on loop in your head that isn't right. It's just not you. And well, what movie do you want to be playing in an ideal world? Scroll through the library, find it, click play, and start doing the small things that make it real. There's so much power. in progress. I've seen this unfold in different areas of my life, but particularly as a writer,

as a speaker, it's like you identify who you want to be. You start making tiny steps, and after a while, you're surrounded by the change that you've created. How can you not believe something that you're starting to live? It has to become your identity because it is you. It's around you. You breathe it. So look around and realize the malleability of your situation. And if what you find is not you, good. Here is your opportunity to tear down the old and construct the new. You can do that because you have control. Because it's within your grasp. So start the new movement. So start the new The new story, make yourself the hero, and set out to find yourself again. Sometimes when you don't know where you're going, the best thing to do is go there.

A wise man once stated that an object at rest stays at rest. And while his rationale is a little different than mine, I'm going to borrow from his premise. Right? Because when you move, even if you don't know where you're going, you put yourself on a collision course with something. You put into existence an entity to react to. Some call it destiny. Others call it fate. I call it simply initiative. Because if your journey is hypothetical, you have nothing. to celebrate nor correct.

A sailboat can adjust its sails once it leaves the harbor, right? It can learn from and manipulate its surroundings, make sure it arrives at a destination, right? It learns and adapts along the way. But from the harbor it speculates. It expounds upon a path that might be straighter, might be faster, might be more thought out and tied together than the crazy sailors who took off for the horizon,

horizon, but in actuality, it goes nowhere. In the real world, it is stagnant, and I could be wrong, but I'd make the argument 10 out of 10 times that the real world is where we want our result. My proof? Well, a journey that started with insurance and evolved into music, in songwriting, in audio production, then video production, and creative writing, then a sweet spot that kind of combined everything, a spot that didn't make its way to my inbox with an exact address. A spot that required a lot of failure and lessons learned and disappointment,

but man, more than that, so much fun. My proof is sitting down right now in real time, letting my fingers create a bridge from nothing to something of value. By the way, after sitting here staring at a blank screen for hours, It's just starting. Could I be wrong? Could I screw up? Could I wildly miss the mark?

Yes. In fact, it happens more than I'd like to admit. But here's the beauty. Even if I am wrong, I now have something to work with. Something has been brought into existence. And well, that means I'm officially further along than I once was. And I've heard over and over again that there is no perfect moment,

that you have to just go. And the idea, I mean, it makes sense. It's impossible not to understand, but it's one of those things that until you feel it, it doesn't mean anything. How can you miss something you've never experienced? Well, to put it in a way that help me understand, you aren't going because, eh, what do you have to lose?

You're going because everything is to be gained. the answers that you pick up along the way, like a little coins you pick up in Super Mario, right? You have to start collecting pieces of a puzzle that you can then arrange. I truly believe that one of the most important ideas we need to hold on to moving forward is personal agency, self-belief. And I say that because I feel like I'm watching it slip. There are cases where we literally don't know or understand that it's within our own ability and control to change our lives. No person or group or letter in the mail is going to come along and green light your idea. In fact, you might not even really know what your idea means or how it will look.

And that's not only okay. It's amazing. It's the marble that you get to chisel away at to create something. See, life is not the perfect execution of a plan. a plan, life is the courage to make your way into a world that no one really understands or knows anything about. I'm not talking physics or biology or quantum mechanics. I'm talking about the real life that is emergent from those areas of study, right?

There is no perfect formula for happiness. But it will always be true that immobility or standing still is antithelisk. antithetical to progress. And there is plenty of data that supports the idea. Progress equals happiness. We want to move towards something. So that's what this is about, right? Here's to not being scared of what we don't know.

Because somewhere in the realm of what we don't know exists what we need most. So yeah, stop waiting for the perfect moment. And yes, begin. because it's an ultimatum. Do it because the things that make life fun and intriguing and exciting and ultimately worthwhile. They live on the other side of your front door. Let's write out of the gate draw a line. The most important line one can draw a line of demarcation separating who you were and who you are. A line between the past and the present in this line marks your return. No, not to the days of old, but to step

one, your chance to begin again, to rise above, to transcend yesterday's character and transform today's potential. See, what we often fail to realize is that there are ideas deeply ingrained in our minds that rule over us, a sort of subconscious. authority. It says yesterday you fell short, so today you are someone who falls short. It says your objective was not reached in the past. So how about a new, maybe easier one? It draws a nice little box, packs you on the head, and says, how about we make a nice cozy home for ourselves in here? And what this subconscious authority fears most is that you wake up, that you become aware, that you return. Not to the past, but to the power tucked away under all the stories you somewhere along the way decided were real.

The second you accept that yesterday is only as relevant as you decided to be, you unchained yourself. You become unshackled. So return to that place of curiosity, where you're not obligated to perform, but gifted with the journey before you. And that could certainly be hard. It was hard for me to look back at my life and distinguish between what I've simply accepted

and life's objective truth. I'd taken orders and been obedient for so long, I'd been listening to that subconscious authority for so many years that I had to, in a way, relearn what creativity meant for me. I had to learn not to feel guilty, going on a jog in the middle of the day

when the rest of the world was working. I had to learn that my instinct wasn't to explore, but to stop short. I wasn't pushing limits or peering around corners. I wasn't testing the waters or seeking out the hidden opportunities. Life hides away. No, I was on autopilot.

And life, it had called for my return. It's funny how when you reject your potential long enough, the universe seems to tap you on the shoulder. It makes it more and more apparent every day that something greater is within an arm's reach, backs you into a corner until you have to address the dissonance between who you are and who you've allowed yourself to be. Those orders you've been taking don't align

with your best self. And so one must not only create, but in a sense return to their greatness. To accept what they've been running from, you are what you choose to be. And let's face it, it's very easy to choose to be less than we can be. There's a saying that your reality is not destined to be. It is rather what you've chosen to accept. You only get in your life what you allow. And the entirety of this message is about one thing. That light bulb moment, the epiphany, the instant of empowerment, that this world can only give you what you ask for. And to not ask, to sit back and observe makes you a spectator, sitting up in the nosebleeds, watching the activity evolve on the court below. It relinquishes control to powers beyond you. And that's

existing. It's not living. So ask. Ask life for the things that lift you up and elevate your existence. The reason a book metaphor works so perfectly in my mind is because when one opens to a blank sheet, they can write about anything. There's no limitation to what can be placed on that paper. And sure, our proclivity may be to continue on the legacy of last novels, cast, and characters, but it's by no means required. In fact, with that pen in your hand, you can craft a new world entirely, new places, new things, new relationships, and ideas, new obstacles to face and defeat. A blank page can be and mean anything, and so every sunrise, every door you walk through presents, in the same sense, a blank page. realize that there's no obligation to perpetuate the past or continue on in the same way you arrived no this day is yours take hold of that self you've hit away find the courage to unshackle yourself from how you were once seen by your friends or your teammates or your co-workers level up

and understand that you don't owe the world any type of explanation Remember, you're not here to conform, to obey, to live a life of obedience. No, you're here to poke, to prod, to explore, to follow the nagging curiosity to embark upon the adventure that is life. When you understand that you are not your past, when you see that the person you were has no control over the person you are in this moment, You are free. So with eyes wide, a beating heart, a head held high, step into that world. Because if you live with conviction, with absolute certainty that life may not always be easy or intuitive, but it's there for you. When you see not yesterday's constraints, but tomorrow's hope, all roads lead to an evolved.

existence. It's not about perfect and it never was. It's about understanding that the past has given you everything you need to break away from its grasp. It has provided the lessons it has knocked you back, pushed you down and tested your resolve all for this moment, this second, the chance to return to the greatness that has been tucked away for too long. Again, no merit. No rabbits out of hats, just you allowing your greatness to emerge from this step forward because you can. Because you have that ability, because it's who you are. So go show the world, but most importantly, show yourself. You will be amazed at what's possible for you.

If you simply allow it to materialize, If you amidst the darkness of days past, let yourself light up the night. There's a quote attributed to Seneca that states no man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity. For he is not permitted to prove himself. Meaning it's in pursuing the difficult thing that we obtain meaning. recognition that we prove ourselves, but prove ourselves to whom. This is the same Seneca who famously stated that we suffer more in imagination than we do in reality, that he is most powerful who has power over himself.

And that's one of the beautiful things about stoicism. It makes us ask a very simple but often overlooked question, Who's really the adversary here? Who's the opposition we're dealing with as we fight our battles? What is it that must be transformed? Is it the outside world? Or the way our eyes view the outside world? What's really holding us back?

The circumstances? Or our own personal thoughts about the circumstance? And I think this is where we misunderstand the challenges before us. I want to delve into this power of perspective to explain that we are the gatekeepers between ourselves and our ideal lives. And very often we do a good job of ensuring that gate stays closed. We sabotage our own goals, our own dreams, our own happiness, while simultaneously pointing the finger.

at a million externalities. See, when we look at the difficulties of life, and there's no doubt that life can be a very difficult thing, it's easy to look at the world as this binary playing field, me versus the world. And in fact, we often visualize the world as the enemy pushing back against us, as if its motives were counter to ours. So many of these narratives,

these stories, they actually say nothing about the outside world. And when we look deeper, it becomes apparent that they actually say a whole lot more about us. It's the one viewing that gets to decipher what the circumstance means. And so all narratives are reflections of the observers. Jim Rhone used to tell a story about two brothers who had an alcoholic father. He'd come home drunk. He'd abuse his sons. They had a terrible childhood.

And as they each grew up and had families of their own, their paths kind of diverged. One became abusive, and the other was kind and loving and caring. And when confronted, the now abusive brother stated, well, look, how can you blame me? Don't you see how I was raised? But the kind, loving, and caring brother stated, of course I'm like this. I could never put my family through what I went through as a child.

Same circumstances. Different lenses, interpretations, which means different real world result. And the idea here is to emphasize how one of the most important abilities a human being possesses is the ability to interpret the world around him. I think of us as subjects navigating a world of objects, as though the things around us don't have meaning until we place meaning upon them. That's what humans do.

Create narratives out of objects. And that often overlooked, seemingly insignificant ability, places a lot of power in our hands. Very rarely is it what we see. It's what we think and what we do about what we see. You ever hang out with people that just tend to be happy, upbeat, positive energy? I have a very good friend like that where his first inclination is always to find the positive.

In moments where I've sort of trained myself to pause. Take a second, sift through the emotion, uncover the value in a tough situation, refocus, and take a strategic step forward. I look over at him and he's already arrived there. He's been there for three minutes, right? Eliminated the negativity. It's his first instinct. He's the metaphorical kid hopping around in puddles, whistling at the top of his lungs, while everyone else is hiding out from the rain, or at least trying to find the courage to run out onto the street with him.

Then there are people who seem to always find the negative. It doesn't really matter what this situation is. Happiness is fleeting, only to reveal the negativity that never seems to go away, right? The kind of person that if they won the lottery, their first thought might be, oh no, but what if I lose it all? Both examples are people projecting themselves onto the world around them. The same way that smoke covers and consumes an entire room.

It's not the room that's the culprit. Here's another example from Jim Rohn, since we're on a Jim Rohn kick. He's making a similar point, and this is all from a collection of speeches. He has on Audible, comparing humans to oranges, which is probably not a comparison you've made recently, but he said there's consistency to an orange and that it can be filled with one thing. When you squeeze an orange, orange juice is coming out. Period. It will never be apple juice or grape food juice. It will only emit what it has inside, which is orange juice. And while here's the connection, when life pressures us,

challenges us, or metaphorically squeezes us, we only emit the emotions that are contained and available, that are alive and well within us. If there is no jealousy contained in our We're not going to project jealousy out into the world. If there is no hatred within us, we will not project hatred onto others. Why is that powerful? It's powerful. Because again, it's one of the most important things you can do. Certainly one of the most important things I've learned to do is take that finger pointing blame at the outside world,

slowly turn it around and point it back at myself. back at myself and ask what thoughts, what emotions, what ideas am I letting live inside my head that's altering the narrative, the story I'm telling about myself and the world that I live in. And while one might think, well, that's uncomfortable, that's unfair, a little extreme, why should I point at myself? It's not my fault. I would challenge you, at least for the sake of the next few minutes to see such a change as empowering as your advantage as the bridge from where you are to where you want to be see if you always have feelings of let's say jealousy around a particular person that feeling in your stomach like oh they have it all they're ahead

they live how I want to live they're this and that and I kind of hate them for it you're naively giving the external world the power you're saying I feel the way I do because of that out there, some cosmic injustice, you are powerless because you're neglecting your personal agency as a factor. But when you turn that finger around and say, I only feel this way because I'm allowing myself to, then you can ask the question. So many never think to ask. Why?

Why do I feel this way? lights a path to how can I fix it? See, the key to a better life is realizing you don't have to be in the passenger seat pointing at and blaming the driver, complaining about the road being taken, no, you can get into the driver's seat. You can take the wheel, you can take control, inherit responsibility. And there's more at stake, there's greater vulnerability. but the upside is unfathomable. And I find myself thinking all the time,

man, people are blaming the wrong things. They're shifting blame to the wrong adversaries. The real villain here is not the driver or the road or the weather. The real villain is the voice in your head pleading with you not to take the wheel. pleading with you to ride shotgun and complain as the world passes you by. And of course it makes sense to qualify that, with the inevitability that there are some things placed upon us that are just bigger than us, that we can't control.

And you can make a list however long you want to, natural disasters, decisions, and actions of others, health problems. We don't often get to choose the landscape. So as the Stoics would say, understand that. Understand what you can't control and what you can. Because the beauty is that you can control how you navigate that landscape and that is power. That is what makes the difference. See the two brothers, I mentioned a few moments earlier, same landscape.

Different navigational tactics. Different view of what it all meant. One took the wheel and one did not. So that's Seneca quote. That states, no man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity, for he is not permitted to prove himself. Well, it's perfectly clear as far as I'm concerned. The question is not whether or not to face adversity.

I think we all understand that. What I hope we take from today is a better understanding of what the true adversity is. A better understanding of the fact that in front of us there is always an answer, a key to every lock. Some people just don't think to look. They're so busy peering around every corner for external enemies and scapegoats that they don't give themselves permission to succeed. unfortunate but it's true you can hit the bull's eye over and over again but if it's the

wrong target it won't do much for you might as well have missed by 50 feet and I think that is what we overlook you can't always fix the outside world you can't change the unchangeable but you can always change yourself you can always fix you is Tolstoy said everyone wants to change the world but no one thinks of He's changing himself. You're capable of being both your greatest adversary and ally. So choose wisely. Because the world around you will do nothing more than respond accordingly to your decision.