Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - STEPS TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE | Powerful Motivational Speeches For Success | MORNING MOTIVATION

Episode Date: October 21, 2022

"Your life does not get better by chance. It gets better by change" - Jim Rohn

Fear is an integral part of life. It's a natural reaction to be afraid of something that we believe to be dangerous. In specific situations, it keeps us from harm, right? We don't put our hand near a flame for fear of being burned. And that's a good thing. That's its biological intent. It's part of the reason our species was able to evolve and flourish. But just as it helps us, it can be our biggest obstacle.

It becomes easy to see everything is that flame that will burn our hand. We fence ourselves in, we create a comfort zone, because a comfort zone is safe. And because of this, we miss out on some of life's greatest opportunities. Most things worth having live outside of our comfort zone, on the other side of fear. Everyone deals with being afraid. It's who we are.

The difference lies in how we handle it. Quoting Peter McWilliams, he says there are two types of people. People who experience fear while trying to grow themselves and expand their comfort zone and people who feel fear just thinking about expanding their comfort zone. Never acting because they're scared of the unknown. It's the exact same fear that is felt by both. both types of people, those who act and those who hide. The difference is that one grows and one doesn't.

One creates a life of adventure, of passion, the other a life of regret. It's funny because you start to hear these things. So much that they come across is cliche, right? Fear is the great barrier. How many times have we heard that? But when was the last time you woke up and did something about it, made an effort to do exactly what you're afraid of. Put yourself on the front line.

Put yourself out there. These are the experiences that shape our character, where we prove to ourselves that, hey, maybe it's not so bad. Realistically, the worst that could happen is that you don't meet expectation. It's that you fall on your face. In which case, you pick up your pride,

you look yourself in the mirror, and you get ready for round two. Because round two means you come back more prepared. knowing what to expect. That's why it's been said that even if you fall on your face, at least you're moving forward. Eventually you'll adapt. This new challenge will become part of you.

It becomes okay. It becomes comfortable. And look, just like that, you've expanded your comfort zone. Now you can move on to the next chapter. So remember, the people you admire, the people who have done great things, lit the path for you. the path for us. It's not that they weren't afraid. It's that they use their fear as a tool

for growth. Not a crutch. It's part of the reason we have such awe and fascination with the great minds of history. Imagine Neil Armstrong, looking back one last time before stepping into the spacecraft that would take human beings to the moon for the first time. Jackie Robinson, suiting up for his first game with the Dodgers. The American colonist signing the Declaration of Independence. We don't think about it often. But just imagine if these people gave into the fear they must have felt overcoming these obstacles.

What would we have? How different would life be? So my ask of you is that you find a way. You find a way to get to the other side of fear because that's where dreams become reality. It's where your world can change if you just allow it to. Why is it that when we look back on our lives, it's never the easy days or the simplicity.

It's not the calm that changes our reality or makes us who we are. Don't get me wrong, calm and simplicity. They're wonderful, but they're not transformative. And why would they be? Why would we change or seek to obtain more without a reason or incentive? It's times of struggle, of turbulence. It's when life was hard that we had to rethink who we are. Reshape the way we look at the world.

Because without chaos, you don't get calm. Without the storm, you don't get those crazy neon colors and golden rays. It leaves as it passes by. In order to triumph in any capacity or any area of life, there's always a sacrifice that must be made. The adversity is the fire that forges the iron. There's a saying hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times.

It's a cycle. This is generally used in a sociopolitical sense, and I think, in a lot of ways it applies today, but where I've really found it useful, where I've found value in it is at the personal level. Because what I've noticed is that growth also appears to have a cyclical nature. And when we're in a rough situation or overcoming an obstacle, we have to push, we fight, we grow. Sometimes without even realizing it, we achieve a result. And by default, this transformation that, in our world, we're going to be a result. one way or another makes us something new.

But then it becomes easy to level out, right? And that's the challenge. It creates this period of stagnation. It's like we made the jump and it becomes real easy to stay there. And that's why I have found value in when life is not providing resistance to manufacture some. Because that's the only way to grow. Progress is happiness.

Victor Frankel and Mansearch for meaning, you know, he says purpose is to find from struggle. If things are too calm or simple or quiet, life begins to lack meaning and that's never a spot we want to be. Life is about the pursuit of something. You just have to figure out what that blank will be. You get to decide which mountain to climb. There's a story about a butterfly making its way out of a cocoon. It makes a little hole.

It starts attempting to push its way out. Someone walks by. They see it struggling and open the cocoon up to have a little hole. help the butterfly out, right, thinking that they did this great deed. But in doing so, that butterfly has now lost its ability to use its wings to fly. Why? Because the strength that was necessary to fly would have been forged when he fought his way out. The butterfly was deprived of the very thing it needed to become something more. And that's the point. It's easy to get lost in the now and seek to eliminate everything that doesn't make the moment more comfortable to

remove that which doesn't make things easier. But whether we're talking about collectively or the complacency in our individual lives, we have to remember that avoiding discomfort isn't the answer. When your biggest problem is Amazon taking five days to deliver or that your feelings are hurt by someone's comments or opinions on social media,

you've lost track of yourself. You may be living in a world lacking the resistance necessary for growth. Maybe it's time to ask what matters. And I remember when I lived in Boston, I'd walk around listening to podcast downtown, and I'll never forget here in Ryan Holiday differentiating between passion and purpose. He called passion temporary, a dopamine hit. It's the excitement before the project begins, the beginning of a journey, the honeymoon fate. But passion alone falls short. And it falls short because anything worth watching,

is hard. It tests us. It repeatedly presents us with those metaphorical cocoons we have to fight. We have to earn our stripes, grow our wings, and if we stop at passion, there's no reason to battle on. To take the punches, knowing that they will create for us a tomorrow full of infinite possibility. and that's where we need purpose. That's why it matters. We need something bigger to march towards. A destination that's meaningful. To remind us that those challenging times,

they're not a burden. There is no poor me here. They are the fire that sharpens us. That whispers to us, not only the importance of carrying on, the power contained within ourselves to do so. This world, it is not stacked against you. It's never the problem or the obstacle.

No, it's the opportunity laid out at your feet. And it's in those very times when we're uncomfortable, when we're unsure, when we don't know where to draw our strength. that we need to remember it comes within. It's an idea that is brought to life through courage, through understanding, through the trials and tribulations of life that didn't intimidate or hold you back, knowing that life has given you everything you need to blaze your trail. So don't be afraid to let it take you somewhere new.

Welcome to Your World Within Daily. I'm Eddie Panero. And in this episode, I want to talk about sort of a guiding principle to help make the move when you know what you have to do, but you're stuck. You forget that the value is on the other side of the difficult decision in front of you. So I want to start with a story about cliff jumping with my first. friends maybe four years ago now we flew into Las Vegas spent some time in Vegas and then we hit like national parks in Utah and then Arizona went all the way up the coast and we were in Lake Tahoe at the very end there's this spot to cliff jump this really really high peak and you know it's notorious and it was just like a scary thing and and I remember walking up There were three of us and two other people were there. It's like you have to hike up to it.

It's kind of in the woods a little bit. One of my buddies walked up and we thought he was going to jump right off. And he stood there and he looked down and he looked down for, I don't know how long, a while. You know, ultimately jumped. As far as I knew, I wasn't afraid of stuff like that, right? So I walk out and I look over the edge and I could not bring myself. myself to jump. Physically, I couldn't do it. Rationally, I couldn't speak myself or talk myself into it. There was no more rationality going on. It was just, I was frozen in fear, and I just remember

sitting there and looking down. And, you know, people would come up and ask about it, and they'd be like, you know, can I jump? And I'm like, go ahead, right? Like, it almost got to the point where it was hurting my pride and I still couldn't jump. And I just stood there and I stood there and I stood there. You know, I forget how long it took. I don't really know and time was probably felt insane in that moment but eventually I did and it was incredible, right? It was a forever long drop and just the adrenaline and the excitement and you realize for a second that type of thing, That's peak living and there's more of that out there in the world. And all of a sudden you want to capture it and obtain it.

And you realize what you had been missing. You know, and then my friend came up after me. He stood there for just as long too, right? It's just a very weird thing and it's hard to explain. There are so many situations that are this peak. in our life, this cliff that we know we need to jump from. We know the other side is better or we suspect, but we can't bring ourselves to do it.

And this all came from a quote I found from John Green, one of my favorite authors in his book Paper Towns. It says, it is so hard to leave until you leave. And then it is the easiest goddamn thing in the world. And that's right on the money. Being on the edge of that cliff, it is terror, sheer terror.

It is so hard to make that jump. And then you do, and it's like life opens up. And it's the same thing in this case, right? It's so hard to leave until you do. It's terrifying to uproot, to change, to go somewhere you don't know. But once you do, life opens up. It's incredible. The other side is beautiful and it's it's it's it's waiting for you.

All of this is coming to a single point, a rule that I used to guide my decision making. And the rule is simple. If you are not content where you are, that is your reason to jump. Because on that cliff, rationality dissolves. The future is unknown and it's scary. And how are you going to logically talk yourself into a scary unknown when you're at that point? You can't. It doesn't make sense. And I think that's why so many of us are scared to make that jump.

And we ultimately turn back and we concede and go, okay, I'll just stick with what I have. This isn't great, but it is what it is. I can't bring myself to make that jump. We're all there at some point. I've been there. I've been there with speaking. Big cliff for me when I first started. Ultimately jumped and put me on a trajectory that changed my life. Same thing with making videos. Same thing with my first client. Like all these things, they're terrifying. And in the moment, you can't logically speak through them. So you just have to go. And it's like, well, how do you logically,

you don't? You just go. Because if the present, here's the rule, the present is not making you. content, go, jump, right? Never forget that the path, the future is comprised of a trillion paths. And you can bend them and shape them and remake them. And sometimes it won't work. Sometimes it'll, you know, blow up in your face. But again, you're still presented with an opportunity to adjust and remake and bend and re-approach and continue forward.

Right? The only way to lose is to stay on that cliff for the rest of your life. And so if you needed some type of rationality, if you needed some type of reason, I'm hoping that maybe I can give that to you today. If you are not content where you are, jump. Because somewhere along the way, you'll figure it out. Every time I've jumped, it's changed my life for the better. Maybe not immediately, but ultimately. And as I say, that's what life's all about.

Hey, I hope you got something from this podcast. If you did, please subscribe, rate review. Helps me get it out to the world. And, guys, I appreciate that. And I will catch you tomorrow. You ever wonder how much of you has materialized? Like, if what F. Scott Fitzgerald says is true, and our lives are defined by opportunity, even the ones we miss,

then how much remains in the year? And I don't think it's about playing a game of what if. You know, that would be endless. It would be self-defeating. No one's perfect. I don't even really think it's about making a right turn instead of a left. Because as long as you're moving and moving with conviction, life ultimately brings you where you need to be.

But more, my concern is the steps never brought to people. My ideas on the hatch, my opportunities, I either knowingly or unknowingly left on the shelf. shelf because it didn't seem real enough like a Broadway play between my ears that as a spectator I knew would end after all that's what stories do how much of ourselves have we passed aside as simply the things we don't say out loud at first it's infinite we've yet to be taught to limit because limits aren't things their ideas and ideas must be adopted that's why they say some of life's best things were done by people too ignorant to know they were impossible, too naive of the

notion that they couldn't say them out loud. Then it's comparison, they have what I want, but it was meant for them and not me. How delusional to think I could have it. How crazy to think that life has yet to be written, and I am an author. My date is with normalcy in the box where I keep those things we don't say out loud. And then we look around and we see highlight reels. We see awards and vacations and smiles, but we don't stop to think maybe they're just like me. Maybe they're people who struggle and question themselves and doubt the road ahead. No, it must be the past diverged. They took happiness and I took those things we don't say out loud.

And then there's everyday life when things don't go as planned. When the world presents curveballs and you haven't learned to hit off speed so you feel small and you feel inadequate and ill-equipped and you could reach out, but that's not cool. That's not right. That's something that you don't say out loud, but we keep it in, like all in. And eventually, if he comes the if only's, and I wish I had, it's the quiet envy gazing longingly towards those who just cared less, who realized maybe life's not as serious as we make it out to be, who turn thoughts to things, not by burying, but by embodying them.

And maybe that's the trick to unlock the gate, keeping your perceived reality from the possibility of a new one. The one you could create, if only you promoted your fleeting. thoughts to forward progress. See, dreams can fail to come to fruition in two places in your head and outside of it. But at least outside it has a chance. At least outside, you can take the common, normal, everyday background and make it the back drop to your movie where you play a lead role.

But it must be accepted and acknowledged, not thought of or even whispered, but screamed so that the details and the tributalities that exist now work for you. That's right, they are now yours. Not because you thought about it, but because you reached out a hand and you took. You asked the world for something. And in life, it will always be true that you don't get what you do not ask for. So when you find yourself staring up a wall comprised of self-defeating narratives and manufactured limits, be ignorant, be irrational, be the reason your dreams have a chance. And when you look around and you see more and wonder why you don't have it, know that you can. You're allowed to. If you sacrifice, you will, but you must believe

you are worthy of it. Not in the back of your head where you keep your locker combo and movie quotes, but in reality where words bounce off lips. And when you feel like life is treating you unfairly like they're happier or have it better, know that life is peaks and and valleys, not just for you, but for everyone. And how you internalize that and carry on makes the difference. And when you feel lost or stuck, you are not hopeless, but in progress. Being broken down so that you can be reconstructed, stronger, better. Victory is not in hiding those struggles, but accepting them as the difference,

as the reason you created the miraculous. Not because you had dreams, but because you said them out loud. If it means something to you, it's not wrong. I'm talking about different roads, going to different places, different ways at different times, none more or less important than any of the others. It's an amazing thing that a perfect life can mean something so different to each and every one of us. You know, I get asked quite a bit about my decision to do what I do, as far as what prompted the journey, the process of turning a page beginning a new chapter, and in essence leaving what didn't serve me to pursue what does.

And what I realize is that a lot of these conversations are with people that have an outlook very similar to mine, right? We value a lot of the same things. But there's a distinction between what you see every day and what truly reflects reality. Is what's around you the only option? Is it the real deal or is it a part of the puzzle, right? Like if you look at Twitter, for example, you have 20% of American supposedly used Twitter. And of the conversation on Twitter, 80% of it comes from 10% of the users, right?

So it's a subset of a subset, but how easy is it to open the app and think that's a reflection of the world and how people think and what's going on? It's not. It's a very small fragment. And the reason I bring it up, the reason it's important is because we tend to look at what we see around us as the right way or the instruction manual. You know, I've talked a lot about the corporate world, like it was essentially a prison for me, right? And in many ways, it was because of the way I think, how I get fulfillment, right? There was a predictability and a straightforwardness that just doesn't mesh with my personality, but that's me.

And I had the realization the other day when I was on someone's podcast and they asked me, well, how come some people don't get it? How come some people don't understand the entrepreneurial spirit or that sort of adrenaline that comes with the high highs and the low lows? And I spent some time thinking about the answer and I think it boils down to something simple. It either pulls you that way or it doesn't, right? The thought process isn't the right way to live or the wrong way to live. It's one of many ways to live. It depends on what you gravitate towards. You know, I like to reference one of my best friends, Chris,

because we couldn't be more different, right? He has a nine to five. He loves the structure. He's immersed in it. And because of that, he's moved up the organization very quickly, comes home, spends time watching TV with his beautiful kids, cooks with his wife, sends the group chat shots of the, you know, the smoked pork

or whatever the hell he makes. He's in heaven. He loves his world. You know, but then he looks at, you know, my world. He sees the unpredictability of my life, my choices, traveling, moving around all the time, the financial oscillation where it's like one month is great financially, the next it's underwhelming, it's up and it's down, and he goes, how do you live like that? You know, and I could ask the same of him, where's the rush, where's the uncertainty?

You know, it's two very distinct ways of looking at the world, and I think that's incredible. But I also think it's easy to miss, you know, like, Twitter, you sort of think what's around you, what you see is the real deal, is the path, is where you should be. And it's why a lot of people are concerned or question themselves. It's like there's this invisible metric, whatever side you fall on, there's a right way or a wrong way, and that's not true. There's your way. If it means something to you, it's right. And that's the standard, period. It's where you need to be, right? Who is anyone else to set those standards? No one knows you.

And I think the question is twofold. One, have you taken the time in your busy life to identify what that is? Whatever it may be, have you thought about it? I'll never forget a friend asked me once, you know, what my perfect day looked like. He asked me to describe it in detail. And I looked at him like a deer in headlights. I'm like, I don't know. I've never thought about that, right?

He could tell me when he got up from when he went to bed what his perfect day was. He goes, well, how could you ever have one by accident? Right? So do we take time to think about what matters? And number two, are you willing to drive towards whatever that is? Whether it's entrepreneurship or athletics, being a rock star in the corporate world, being a world-class painter, an amazing dad, some combination of some or none or all of these things. Like, what are you aiming for?

But it's nice sometimes to get that reassurance that your path, regardless of how different or quote unquote normal it is, if it's right for you, it's right. And that's something that no one can tell you. You know, so much of life is a conversation with yourself. It really is. You have to give yourself permission to live. And I've spoken about it. You know, I've spent a lot of years at that intersection of what I thought was right

because others were doing it and what truly made me happy, waiting for the light to turn green before realizing that that moment doesn't come. You need to be the one to change. change it. Life is a beautiful experiment, but it is an experiment, which means you need to get to work. You know, it's testing what you love, what you don't, where you want to be, where you have no interest in being, and embracing that, right? Discovering what you love, what's meaningful, and then trusting yourself to get there. That to find ourselves requires we must first lose ourselves is I believe life's greatest paradox, leaving that carousel of comfort, the predictability

of what we know, the certainty of who we believe ourselves to be. For a promise with no real guarantee of being kept, well, it's nothing short of irrational. Are the odds in our favor, perhaps not. But by stepping off, by placing our bets on a different track with a different prize, at a different time, we have increased those odds from zero to, well, I guess we decide. And see, the world teaches us that it's advantageous to spin. A spinning carousel is predictable. It can't be cheated. There's very little room for loss or humiliation or setbacks or, even life to get in the way. You know where you start and you know where you end and that's just the thing. This spinning world is so easy that people don't want to leave. In fact, it's

not until you walk away from the crowd that you even face the unknown. And that's precisely why it's so hard to walk alone. It's hard, it's challenging because of the now. Not because the now can't be measured or understood. No, we get it. But because there's this little whisper in the back of our heads that the now might go on and on and on forever, that that check will never be cashed, the summit never reached. No, just footsteps down a perpetually long, windy road.

And that's, you know, when maybe, just maybe we miss that carousel. We miss the safety and security. And that's what sometimes makes it such a stressful thing to walk alone. We think about all of ourselves, our mind, our heart we've left behind along the way. Truths, we now have to face things. They never taught us on that carousel. We had to learn that we were wrong about who'd be by our side through it all. We could no longer hide behind the notion that when things got tough,

someday everyone, everything would be there would be the same. We learn to swim by jumping into the deep end. Seeing in real time that people only believe it already exists. What's put in front of them. That ideas are empty. That a dream is a language only spoken by its creator. And if you want it to mean anything, you must dedicate your life to translating it.

We learn how much is backwards, how much of life is reactive. that success is being one of the few who don't react, but build a world to react to. And in the thick of it all, to internalize the process because talking, while talking does nothing, plans are just potential energy confined to your pocket. You have to be okay growing that seed by yourself.

Like a runner making her way past a crowd, right? The crowd sees calm, sees peace, sees the finesse of an athlete gliding over the pavement. They have no idea the war being fought behind her eyes. The silencing of constant whispers to slow down to do less,

the repression of pain that consumes her to such an extent it can't even really be pinpointed. It just kind of floats over her body. They'll never know that. And what we learn is that they don't need to. It's a true.

And see, it's also what makes it quite lonely to walk alone. Walking alone, well, it's a lot of things. But it's never boring. It's never dull. And if you can hang in there long enough without even noticing the headwind you've been fighting, it becomes a tailwind. And where we may have felt alone, the idea pops into our heads that that maybe that's not quite right.

If anything, the wind at our back is now momentum. It's a partner along the way. That carousel, yeah, it's still spinning, but somewhere else. Some far off place beyond our field of vision. And no, things don't ever become easy. We wouldn't want that. But difficulty is interpreted differently. interpreted differently now.

Not a burden, but a cost. And one we'd gladly continue to pay. And that space that once felt so empty, so desolate, so helpless. Well, now it's made up of people who see what you see, who hopped off their own carousels and wandered through the desert. They too navigated through the impossible and the never- been done. It's funny how at some point we always find each other. And I suppose now, having traded the carousels for the adventure, we can walk alone together. Us against the world,

standing up in defiance of the odds, chasing that glimmer of hope, all in a pursuit a pursuit to find what most won't and see what most can't. Not because we were made different, but because we chased down the idea of different. It gets a tough rap walking alone. And in so many ways, it's a fight. It takes all of you. But you don't come out the same person you were when you stepped in.

The same person you'd still be today had you stayed on that. carousel. So if you are still spinning, step off. And if you have, if you're still adjusting to the discomfort of reality, if you're making your way through the hell of uncertainty, or questioning whether you have what it takes, or have the strength to commit, I promise. In fact, you're right where you need to be. So don't be distracted by those screaming of their successes or communicating, capturing every small win as they make their way around the carousel.

It's the quiet ones who change themselves, the ones who take life one step at a time, one battle at a time who redefine reality. And I'm sure you can't see it now. No one can. No one can see the sun amidst the storm. you'll emerge stronger than you ever were you will navigate towards the ideal and away from that life you once settled for it's a long path but it's worth it so get up and let your feet guide let's go walk alone there's often a vast distinction between what we think is holding us back

and what is actually holding us back. And that may even be putting it lightly. Most of the time we're just plain misinformed. Most of the time, we're looking externally at irrelevant discrepancies between ourselves and someone else. We're looking at things that happened yesterday, possible outcomes that may happen tomorrow. we're creating entire stories, crafting narratives,

building hostile worlds that simply don't exist. When what we need is simple, to give ourselves permission, to let ourselves walk out that front door and towards what we long for. And this came to light recently. I shared a simple 20-second message on TikTok where basically I highlighted John Green's quote

about the best things in life occurring after we find the courage to depart or leave where we are, right? To build again. And as I was looking at the response, it was both beautiful and eye-opening. Hundreds and hundreds of comments from people saying that the message helped them feel empowered to do what they've been putting off.

And some called it fate. Some called it what they needed to hear at the exact moment. They needed to hear it. And as I'm going through, I keep thinking the same thing over and over and over every single one of these people. They already knew in their hearts what needed to come next. They knew what would make them feel alive. They knew where the compass was pointing. Yet their default led them to the same place we've all been.

waiting for external permission, waiting for life to give us a reason to say, okay. The light is now green. You can go. The time is right. Now, don't get me wrong, it means the world that a simple message can shift one's perspective that way. I've been on the receiving end. I'm stock looking for some type of guidance we all have, but I think we'd all agree that if that guidance helps us get back on track, back on track and the real question should be how do we live so that we can stay to the best of our ability on track find ourselves less prone to those occurrences more confident in ourselves

in our dreams in where we're going and for me it's been understanding that in my life I am the one that creates signs and sends the permission slips I say go and when I I remember that, I'm free to do what's best for me. I'm simultaneously the architect and the pieces, the wind, and the sail. See, you don't need a reason to walk out of a relationship you're not happy in. You don't need a reason to leave a job that's not pushing you to be who you most want to become. You don't need a reason to change a habit or reinvent yourself or be able to be. Again know all you need is the courage to green light what your heart already knows it wants We think that the external world has the answers for us

When in reality we've had them the whole time we just want something to point to say see I was right But we don't need to be reactive We can be proactive You can be the one that lights the fire When you follow your intuition, your heart, your sense of purpose, life conforms because it has to conform. When you become an immovable object, life around you moves. It makes way. And if it doesn't, then you go back to the drawing board.

You adapt and adjust. And that's the beauty of life. That's how we build meaning, trusting ourselves to watch. into that resistance because the friction and the headwind is never what's holding us back are they uncomfortable yeah at times does it scare us sure it's supposed to but it's not what holds you back waiting for someone or something to come along and green light your journey through life is what holds you back and I'm It's funny, I think we again and again overlook the simplest of truth.

The hardest part is starting. It's convincing yourself that, one, it's possible, and two, you're worth it. Everything else you face from the second you walk out, that front door can be conquered. In fact, we ourselves grow along the way so that we can rise up and meet the demands of life. but it's unquestionably doable. That thought as you look out the window, right? What if the worst case scenario happens? Can't.

Because the worst case scenario is sitting in that seat your whole life, looking out the window and imagining a world where you found the courage to be more, to explore, to live life as it was meant to be lived. But let's say, let's say that what we fear does come to fruition. Then I ask, what are the odds? It's reversible, probably high. Let's say I want to start a podcast, and I finally work up the courage,

and I get my mic, and I start my show, and no one listens. But I keep going, and I keep going, and nothing sticks. And most importantly, I learn, look, I'm really not crazy about this idea. It wasn't what I thought it was. It's not me. Okay, perfect. Now you know. And sure, it took time to learn that lesson.

but you have the rest of your life to continue the beautiful experiment to search for what lights you up. But you found the courage to explore, to try, to begin, and you are now better because of it. That's your worst case scenario? Sounds a lot less scary to me than a life lived sitting there looking out the window. See, we can't let the fear of an unlikely worst case. Stop the possibility of that oh so coveted best case. Don't let the virtually 0% probability of losing everything overshadow the opportunity to gain everything. Let's never allow ourselves to get caught standing still waiting for the universe to give us the answer as though we're waiting for a letter in the mail.

No, give yourself permission to see the upside, to make you. to make your own decisions and most importantly to live your life. If you're lucky enough to be different, don't let go. I spend a lot of my time and energy exploring the power of perspective. How our reality is determined by how we interpret what's in front of us. How one person can look at one thing and see pain or a problem or a barrier and another person can look at that exact same thing and see opportunity or a future win or a bridge to something better. And I think one of the best examples of this is how we perceive those qualities that make us

unique, those things that put us in a different category. Maybe we're a little hesitant to fully embrace because they're not common. And when it comes to that which separates us from everyone else, Well, I believe we have a decision to make. I'm going to go back to Robert Frost's fork in the road, right? He says two paths diverged in a wood. I took the one least traveled by, and that made all the difference. On the surface, you could easily brush this off as trivial. It's like, oh, nice, that's cute.

He took the path less traveled by. But what does that mean? As it turns out, it means a lot. It means instead of burying what makes him different, he made it his battle cry. Instead of slipping under the radar and sneaking through life like so many of us do, he signed the dotted line for the pain of being a beginner, the struggle of being uncertain, the discipline and sometimes torturous road that is turning a passion into excellent, trading peace of mind for the pursuit of meaning in life.

Exploring what makes you unique, it takes courage. And in that message, he chooses courage. Because it's not just that you're alone. Taking that path means every step of the way, your mind screams at you reminders that you're alone. It's not just fighting traffic patterns, it's fighting your DNA. It's resisting that impulse to,

please sit down, shut up, and blend in. So is it a trivial decision? I'd say not really. Maybe even the most important decision you can make. Because I promise you it's not your commonality with those around you that will bring fulfillment. That will leave a mark on your life and the world that surrounds you. No, it's that thing that's unequivocally you. That's a little out there that's somewhat strange.

that you don't know why, but it's gravitational force, pulls and pulls and pulls, a tug of war, where one side begs you to just relax, conform, do less, begs you to never be laughed at or criticize, to take the easy road. Then you have the other side, poking, prodding, asking you, hey, yeah, but what if?

What if you sacrifice the comfort of right now? What if you sacrifice the comfort of right now? What if you took that which you love and you ran with it? What if you worked for a delayed payday? What if for a moment in time when people ask you what the plan is, you have to look back and say, you know what, I'm not quite sure what I'm building? But I'll keep pivoting until it's so clear you can see it from the moon.

Those are the paths that pull us apart. And every time I've lost my way, it's because I'm It's because I've doubted my unique path. And I mean that every time. It's when I become impatient with the journey or look around and see someone else winning in a different arena using different methods, different strategies, see the latest trends and success formulas.

Hey man, I want part of that, right? I'm human. I want to win. I want to succeed. But just like a little opening is enough to let in the outside water that sinks the boat. Well, a little bit of doubt is enough to derail your process. A process that you have to believe in, protect, nurture, a process that I've come to separate into two pieces. Number one, believing that the exploration of that thing that makes you unique, it's valuable. That your abilities mean something.

They're not inconsequential. They're not stupid or trivial or unnecessary. If it means something to you, it will most certainly mean something to others. And you bringing it to life not only helps yourself, evolve, grow, flourish. It helps the world. You just have to believe that enough to bring it to life. That's number one. Number two, trusting that as long as you don't stop in pursuit of your unique self, you can't lose.

You can't lose. And I don't mean continuing to ram a square peg into a round hole. I mean growing, learning, experimenting, seeing what works. There's a saying that when you hit a dead end, it's not that the goal or the dream should be abandoned. It means the plan needs to be changed or adjusted. And as you get better and more experience and continually work to adjust your strategy and your plans, learn from your mistakes, it becomes a matter of time. You increase the odds with every step forward.

Being different is the most precious thing afforded to you. But to realize that miracle. requires a combination of both the mythical and the practical, the imaginary, and the real. Dream that dream, visualize that growth, create a world out of those ideas that don't exist yet. But also understand that the conversion process from dream to reality is a practical one. It requires repetition. Learning, losing, adjusting, and people don't like that. It's much easier to blend in than spend years pushing through the agony of setting yourself apart.

But it's worth it. And the evidence is so obvious, so plainly pointing to the fact that we only celebrate the outcasts, the crazy ones. We sit around campfires, listen to lectures, watch movies and documentaries. about the people that had every reason to doubt themselves but kept moving forward, about the people who could have swept their unique abilities under the rug, but instead used them as their foundation for everything, not being distracted by what's popular or how anyone else lives or operates, not seeking to be anyone but themselves, knowing that that is enough,

knowing it's the seed to something precious. The only question is will you provide the right conditions and nourishment for that little seed to grow? Will you do what so few people have the courage to do? Let their authentic selves shine through. Let who they are emerge. Emerson has a quote. He says, to be yourself in a world that's constantly trying. trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.

He goes on to say, my life should be unique, it should be an alms, a battle, a conquest, a medicine. And see, perpetual happiness is a fool's errand. Now life is full of trials and tribulations and ups and downs. But fulfillment comes from that quest for meaning, for more, for building something, for creating your unique self, a process, a pursuit that must be chiseled from stone. It's never given or provided. It has to be found. Take it. And as Emerson beautifully implies, now is the time. The question is, what are you going to make with this once and a lifetime opportunity? What will you make of the

possibilities that only you know? Only you understand that. only you can bring to life, never doubt yourself or your gifts or the things that set you apart. You don't need everyone else to believe in them. You just need to convince yourself. Everything else it falls right into place. One of my favorite quotes is by Oscar Wilde. He says that, An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all. How perfectly. Ideas should invigorate your soul. They should excite, propel you.

But there's a critical distinction in my view, a fine line between ideas and identity. Bringing an idea to life is not the same as building your entire life around, one idea and the danger is that that worldview creates self-imposed restriction. As Carl Jung says, it's not that people have ideas, it's that ideas have people. And that's a problem. It inhibits our greatest power, the ability to think. It means we're walking through life blind. Oscar Wilde says to define is to limit.

Kirkagard says, once you label me, you negate me. when what you believe becomes your identity, you have no choice but to perpetually believe it, to always defend it. It is as much you as your reflection. And when answers have to support your beliefs, well, then their accuracy becomes relevant. It doesn't matter.

You'll find a way to make it fit. You'll put that square peg in the round hole one way or another because the end has triumphed over the truth. I like to look at ideas this way. A world of trains all next to each other, close proximity, going thousands of different directions, different ways, carrying different cargo, going different speeds. And you can hop on and off these trains as you see fit.

If you no longer like the speed or the direction, then you change trains. You don't like the destination it dropped you off at. Maybe it wasn't all you imagined it to be. Get on another train. Go some other place. That's the freedom of life. That's the exploration. The scenario to be avoided is clapping, cheering, holding a banner,

proclaiming the train you're on. Engine number nine is the right train, the virtuous train. The only train that should be taken, as it makes its way off a cliff. But you never took the time to look out the window. And to be clear, I'm not advocating that the goal is to have no principles. to remain forever neutral or be this perpetual switch and know the exact opposite. Have ideas, have beliefs, stand for things that you care about.

But care about them because they mean something to you. Because in your heart and soul they align, because you know the alternative viewpoints, you understand and appreciate the opposing ideas, but they're just not you. They may be, but they're not now. And you're okay with the train you're temporarily on, not because you put a blindfold on, sat down and called engine number nine home, which is what

human beings seem to perpetually be tempted to do. It's in our nature. So here is a reminder that a successful life is an aware life. It's understanding how prone human beings are to dismiss reason and abandon logic, how quickly life can become a team sport, because that feels so much better than being someone who says, wait, maybe we miss something. Perhaps there's a chink in the armor or a flaw in the logic. What's interesting is one does not need to look hard to understand that history isn't defined by what happened. It's defined by how people interpreted and reacted to what happened,

how they molded events into their personal narrative, like a potter making dishes out of clay. We live not in a world of facts, but a world of perception or lack of their own. human beings who blindfolded themselves and make every account fit that narrative. See, data can tell you any story you wanted to tell. Events can be attributed to any cause. Our world is not black and white.

It's very much gray. But we don't want to hear that as we attempt to make sense of what is. It's much easier to be for or against. Over there or over here. Yes or no. They say that if you follow the crowd, you will get lost in the crowd, and while that's because the crowd eliminates the burden of having to think, to make difficult decisions, a crowd simplifies.

A crowd is emotional, void of the thinking needed to change your life and the lives of others. The world should be explored, and one's quest to understand it should never be limited to the phrase, it is what it is. Nothing is what it is. The world is a collection of stories, ideas. Or as I like to put it, almost 8 billion movie screens playing as we make our way through it. Life isn't a three-course meal, it's a buffet, where you choose, where you're aware of what serves you, where you put what matters to you in front of you. And when life becomes too straightforward, it's often because we missed a term. When it becomes too easy to dismiss an opposing viewpoint, it's often because we don't understand it.

When anything outside of a court or a field becomes a team sport, it's very likely that we stopped listening. That we left the train with logic and reason and are taking a nap on the one carrying emotion. There's so much power, there's so much beauty in simply being yourself. But permit yourself to understand who you are. Allow yourself to step outside of the box and access the gray area where life is better understood Have your beliefs have the courage of your conviction seek out what truly matters in life But don't ever let those ideas Have you