Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - Stop Focusing On What's Gone | Best Motivational Speeches

Episode Date: February 21, 2024

“If you focus on what you lack, you lose what you have. If you focus on what you have, you gain what you lack.” - Ben Hardy In today's video, we explore the transformative power of adversity. Each speech is a testament to the idea that our deepest trials often forge our greatest strengths and reveal life's profound beauty. Through narratives of resilience and courage, Eddie illustrates how the most challenging moments can lead to personal growth and an enhanced appreciation for life's richness. This series is an invitation to witness how, even in the shadow of tragedy, there exists a resilient beauty and strength, encouraging us all to find the silver linings and embrace the journey towards healing and renewal. Join us as we celebrate the remarkable capacity of the human spirit to transcend adversity and discover the beauty that lies in the aftermath. YouTube: youtube.com/yourworldwithin

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Are you looking over your shoulder and measuring how far you've come? Or are you only consumed by how far you have to go? The distance between where you are and your destination. Are you living in the abundance that surrounds you or in the scarcity the mind seems to constantly be attempting to trick us into believing? This idea was first made known to me. during a drive one day. I was on the phone with my friend Tom,

who happened to have read the book, and I was pulling into my garage, and the gate wouldn't open to the parking garage. And so I'm sitting there, speakerphone on, and I'm just throwing a tantrum, right? I'm in the car screaming about how ridiculous it is that the gate won't open when I need it to. You know, it's not rocket science,

how is it hard, the thing should open when you press the button. And, you know, then remembering I was on the phone, kind of sat there for a second in silence. And after the momentary pause, Tom's voice comes through the speakers in the car. You know, his usual calm southern accent goes, Eddie, are you living in the gap or the gain right now? It was a lightball moment, right? It's a gait we're talking about, the slightest inconvenience.

Not an intrusion to my health, my family, my friends, my business. the ability to live how I want to live in a country that provides the freedom to do that. It wasn't about the food I would soon eat or the water I had access to. Nope, none of that. It was a gate, a slow to open gate. And I love the idea, you know, the perspective to stop, to look around and ask the question, how serious is this quote-unquote problem? Have I slipped back into the gap in life? forgetting about how far I've come, how much I've done, totally omitting the fact that eight years ago,

I would have given anything to be living on the other side of that gate like I do now. Right. Your perspective seems to be the first thing to go, right? It requires that constant awareness and attention. And I would use this idea every once in a while on and off, right? When I could remember, remember the gain versus the gap, attempting to cling to that perspective when possible. But the idea didn't fully reemerge in any meaningful way until almost a year later. That same friend Tom convinced me to join this mastermind, and, you know, I'm in my first session, sitting in the room. It was led by an amazing guy by the name of Ben.

And Ben made it known to us that day that something. tragic had happened in his family. His newly born son, Ben Jr., had passed away at only 16 days old, right, after battling an illness. And he's telling this story, obviously shaken, still saddened, you know, these things never truly leave you. And what he said changed my life. Rocked me at my core. He looked at the room and he said, how grateful he was for those 16 days, that they were perhaps the most important 16 days of his life, that he learned more about himself in those 16 days

than the rest of his life combined, that the love he got to share, the time he spent, the miracle of being with his son, he wouldn't trade that for the world. It was as much a part of him now as the air he was breathing in. Those 16 days were and their own use. unique way, perfection. And see, we're all, you know, sitting there looking on thinking, you know, this is someone

who's become a friend over the past couple months, right? We are a group. We've spent time together. And it's like, well, how can we help? How can we assist? There's suffering here. What can we do? And obviously, you know, the sentiment there is correct.

You know, everyone's heart. was in the right place, but I think what Ben reminded us in an incredibly moving, powerful way is that our toughest tests, our most difficult battles, sometimes our most painful experiences, there's beauty wrapped under those things. Sometimes the things that mean the most are disguised as our toughest tests, our battles. The courage and strength he demonstrated not only to share the story, but to use it to propel himself, his family in the world around him brought tears to my eyes. It brought that gift of perspective, right? And certainly I don't want to speak for him, but he took what I'd assume is the most challenging

16 days of his life and allowed it to blossom into the miracle it was meant to be, which I can't imagine was easy. In fact, you know, I can see a world where many people aren't able to do what Ben did or have find that perspective that been found. You know, not without the required growth and poise. Not without, you know, learning that that gate outside the parking garage doesn't hold a candle to what's actually important. You know, things don't go the way we draw them up in life. Not always. Life is confusing and chaotic.

It's unpredictable. Sometimes it leaves us with nothing more than a moment to look up and ask why. But if you're able to pause and seek out those answers, if you're able to step out of the gap and into the gain, if you're able to accept the beauty that life is trying to offer you, it's always there. And I hope personally to take Ben and Ben Jr.'s strength, courage, and live my life by their example. To immerse myself into life's abundance and share as much of it as I can with the world. And I encourage you to join me on the journey. Life is a miracle. Let's make the decision to see it that way.

There's a mental shift that's provided me with some clarity, particularly when things don't happen right away. As we all know, the good things don't. Validation is stubborn. It'll take its time. So positioning for that, Putting yourself in the right mental state as you chip away is huge. And the idea is every day you move forward.

It's not about the revolutionary life-altering change in the now. It's about the continuous building up and positioning of oneself for an opportunity to come. In other words, the monumental opportunity is out there. It does exist. and you will inevitably cross paths with it. The question is, will you have grown as a person? Will your skills have been sufficiently developed? Will your overall competency have been elevated enough

so that you're ready to receive it when you do? That's the thing about opportunities. They only matter if we put ourselves in position to receive them, And part of what motivates me every day is the fact that I'm chipping away at those opportunities to come. At some point in the future, opportunities I can't even, you know, understand or fathom in the moment. But the reason I'll be able to capitalize on them is because of today's groundwork. And that's the point here. That's often when life feels heavy what pushes me through.

One of the most spectacular things about human beings is that we can delay gratification. And I don't mean in order to live a miserable existence. I mean putting in work, knowing that one, three, five years down the road, you know, there's going to be things available to us that otherwise wouldn't be. That's why one of my favorite conversations was, you know, around my friend Evans saying hates being asked what his five-year plan looks like. What will life look like, Evan, five years from now? It's like, I don't know, right? I have a direction I'm pointed at, and I'm working every single day to bring that to life, but who knows how many twists and turns life will take?

Who knows about the opportunities that will present themselves when they align with my goals and my competencies at a future date? I'm not going to limit myself or deprive myself of those. You build the man, build the woman, hour by hour, day by day, and know that life rewards capable individuals. That means the power is in making yourself more capable. Probably my favorite quote, Nietzsche, those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who couldn't hear the music, is about that very idea.

Trusting that if you build yourself up, you stay focused. You take an axe to the tree that is your purpose every day, by the way, to the sound of no applause, to no awards or pats on the back, you will ultimately succeed. Because in doing so, you position yourself to receive opportunities, opportunities that otherwise would have passed you right by. Sure, they would have been there, but they would have been beyond the scope of what you could handle. That's just the reality. building oneself up is like an all-access pass to the show that is life. In becoming more, you can see more. You can do more.

You can access more. That's why, as the saying goes, it's not about getting what you want. It's about the person you become along the way. Becoming the type of person who can do those things, who is deserving of those things. So when you're frustrated or down, when you're looking around and saying to yourself, you know, there's still a substantial gap here between where I am and where I'd like to be. Know that you showed up. You did the work. You stacked another sheet of paper on that pile. At the time, right, not enough to make a visible difference.

But over time, sufficient to stand on. You win the day by stacking that sheet and moving forward. You win the day by understanding that you are more capable, more knowledgeable than you were yesterday. You've taken another step forward in positioning yourself to receive those opportunities that will come. If you hang in long enough, they always do. And when they do, you'll think back to all those days of frustration, those seemingly anti-climactic occur. and you'll be grateful that you saw it through, that you weren't frustrated or discouraged by the now,

but rather saw it as the bridge to infinite opportunity. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year? Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master aesthetician, is more than just a skincare company, with four skin-conscious categories, skincare, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products

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Offer ends February 25th. Offers may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit Safeway.com for more detail. There are two kinds of crossroads. First, the external. The crossroads at life beyond your control places before you. The abrupt changes, the sudden twists, the tragedies, even the occurrences we don't quite understand,

and so chalk them up as fate. And then there are the internal, the crossroads that you manufacture, the ones that are self-create, self-induced. The, you know what, I've had enough of this crossroads. The I deserve better crossroads. The, there's more out there and today I'm going to find it, crossroads. And I don't think the two are mutually exclusive. In fact, I think sometimes when we wait too long to manufacture our own crossroads, life steps in gives us a little nudge. The universe pushes us towards that change like a wind at our back.

It doesn't quite make things black and white. doesn't always put a catastrophe in front of us. Sometimes it's the mere whispering that, hey, you're accepting more pain, more friction than you should be. It reminds us to take accountability, to take control of life, something that we seemingly forget more often than we should. One of my favorite stories is Jim Rohn's famous epiphany or light bulb moment. The point where, you know, you basically realize is

enough's enough, right? I'm creating a crossroads here and going down the road that I've known for a long time I should have walked down. And it all starts with a knock at his door. It's a Girl Scout, right, trying to sell him cookies. He walks up, opens the door,

and just desperately, with all of his being, wishes he could buy cookies from this Girl Scout, but he can't because he's broke. He doesn't have the money to buy a box. And so to save face, he tells her, you know, I'm sorry, but another Girl Scout was just here. You know, you just missed her and I bought a box of cookies from her. And she smiles, says, thanks, walks away.

He closes the door and, you know, upon closing it, says, never again. Never again will I have to turn a Girl Scout away because I cannot afford the cookies. never again will I be in this place of lack never again right that's the beginning of a transformation he points to that moment is the day that changed his life he built a crossroads and changed direction in real time

now is this an oversimplification sure right massive transformations are complex no doubt they require a reworking of many things But they all start with a decision. A decision to manufacture that change in your life, to take the road you are not currently taking, to walk down a new path. These decisions can hurt.

They force you to become something you've never been, to do things you've never done. That's no cakewalk. But it's a different kind of hurt. It's the short-term discomfort pushing against friction. It's the building of muscle, which is way different than the psychological hurt of knowing that you're out of alignment. Knowing deep down there's more in you and that it's fading away with each passing day. That's hurt.

And we all know in some capacity that life doesn't always create circumstances that move us. Life waits for us to move ourselves. It waits for the I've had enough moment. It waits for us to see the present, not as all there is, but rather a doorway to the next thing. There are two kinds of crossroads, and I'm a believer that a meaningful existence means not waiting for the external to push you, but allowing the internal to drive you. It's the classic stands or the stage. Where do you want to be? You can sit and watch, clap when you're happy, boo when you're mad, but ultimately not be.

in control, or you can choose to perform, to be on stage, to narrate, to choose your ending, elevate your character, become the hero of your story. And I say this as someone who, at points, has, you know, simply waited too long, looking around, right, praying for the gust of wind that would propel me to the place that I needed to be. Essentially, you know, not understanding that life was waiting for me to greenlight my own journey. Life is about the turns we take at the crossroads before us. And so never underestimate your ability to create that intersection most truly.

And never underestimate your courage to take the turn that you know in your soul needs to be taken. Most often, our greatest source of pain comes not from the moment, but what we suspect that moment will mean. It's not the situation, but in how we perceive the situation. And this is an idea or a concept that I connect pretty directly with fitness or running, simply because that's where, to me, it's most apparent. It screams at me. So being that I run quite a bit, let's dive into that. Most days, when I'm out for a jog or I'm running it strictly for endurance, you know, cardio base,

chance to get out there, breathe, or reset thing. But then there are times when I say to myself, this run's going to be a little different. It's going to be dedicated to seeing what I'm made of. Right? I'm going all out, going to push. And what I find is I gradually increase my speed Over the course of the 8-mile route Is that my brain likes to focus on what's ahead.

It becomes fixated on how much is to come, consistently warning me about the distance yet to be traveled And asking whether I have enough left in the tank to get there. It's most extreme in the last mile or so When my body is most exhausted, when I'm pushing as hard as I possibly can. It's a straight shot. I'm looking up at the road ahead.

My eyes are constantly reminding my brain that I'm not yet done, that there's more. Creating an association between more road and more hurt. In a way, creating a little cycle of panic that sometimes appears and hangs out as I'm simultaneously talking myself out of slowing down. Now is not the time to pump the brakes. I've come too far and the finish line is so close.

But it eventually dawned on me that while the adversity contained in this last stretch of the run is difficult, it's the idea that more weights ahead. That's what hurts the most. It's not the body, but the internal voice that's creating the discomfort. In fact, I bet I could run for hours and hours and hours at this speed if it were a life or death situation.

If I had to, it's not the task laid out before me. It's my perception. And so this little line has helped me rethink and readjust. just my approach. Not just in situations like this, or when doing interval training or working out, but when trying to do everything else associated with my life. Grow my business, build a brand, nurture relationships, push boundaries in any other aspect of what I do.

Three words. Stay within yourself. It goes to the idea that your job is so incredibly simple that it's almost insulted. Put one foot in front of the other. Sure, look up so you know where you're going. You don't need to analyze or interpret or dissect. There's no gap between there and here, then and now. There is only this moment.

And so step again and again and again. When the brain starts thinking about how much is left to go, I've betrayed the mantra. Nothing external is allowed. Stay within yourself. You have a job to do and you're capable, beyond capable of doing it. the external must be kept out. The distraction must be kept at bay. And sometimes when you get it right,

you hit this stride, this pace that is equivalent to flying, a rhythm that's unparalleled. Stay within yourself. Step by step by step, the air making its way into your lungs and then exhaled back out into the world. when you simplify life down in such a way. Seemingly large things are exposed for what they really are, a mere commitment to do the little things consistently.

It's funny to look back on all the places I've run over the years and identify or match the geography with the lesson. The routes with the epiphanies, the maps forever entwined in my life, what they gave me and what it meant as I took it all forward into the world. And here we are again, new chapter, new lesson. Then after the shoes come off, the rest of the day commences this little stretch. This last mile plays the role of mentor.

Eddie's simplification is everything, it says. The hard thing is not that hard because it's, It's not that big, it's not that complex. Your monsters are self-created. Your hurt isn't a spotlight on the now. It's pointed at the road ahead. It's asking what if things go wrong? It's asking how long can this be sustained?

It's asking whether I have the strength to endure this. Every question breathes life into an adversary that has has no business existing in my world. They're not helping me get to any finish line. In fact, they're that negative self-talk. I try so hard to mitigate. Except here they are very good at disguising themselves as reality, as just facts of the case, but they are not.

They don't belong anywhere near me or around me. Breathe and step. In fact, I need to deconestate. deconstruct the world around me down into one word now. And what you find when you remove the emotion, the excess, is the simplicity of the task at hand. Maybe not easy, but simple, and complexity is the enemy of progress. Right now may not be comfortable, but at least you're operating with clarity, and that is always enough to simply carry on, to move forward, to stay within yourself.

And that's what this is all about asking the question. Where are you letting what's down the road get in the way of what you're doing now? Where are you letting the pain of what's not yet here, the pain of roads not yet traveled, keep you from doing something that is 1,000% in your wheelhouse, that you are capable of. See, in this example, it's to breathe and step. It's to, in a sense, turn the mind off and go into autopilot.

Find the pace and hold the pace. But the question is, what is your last mile? What metaphorical race are you running? Have you identified, one, the finish line, and two, what needs to happen right now? to get there. Forget about the gap right now. What is the simple solution? What is required of you in this moment? And perhaps most importantly what needs to be pushed out and mitigated. It's often true that we stagnate not because we don't

have the tools or ability but because we're oversaturated with the wrong things, the wrong routines, the wrong thoughts. The best way to break through that self-imposed wall. To actually build walls that will prevent complexity from even attempting to rear its ugly head. What is your run, breathe cycle? So stay within yourself because when you do, you see how strong you are.

Stay within yourself because you are the author of your story. Stay within yourself because all you need is now to push forward. Stay within yourself because that is where the power lives. Stay within yourself because the only way to lose is to let the external end. Stay within yourself because at some point that road will have been traveled down. The finish line will have been crossed. And it will have been precisely your ability to condense it all down into the simple, the ground under your feet that allowed you to get there. Life tried to pull you 1,000 different directions, tell you 1,000 different stories.

But you pushed it all away. Found that power within the moment. and stayed within yourself. Ready to prioritize yourself in the new year? Your skin is a great place to start. Dime Beauty, founded by a master esthetician, is more than just a skincare company. With four skin-conscious categories,

skincare, beauty, body care, and fragrance, Dime offers simple, spa-worthy products that will help you enter 2025 with confidence. Whether you're revitalizing your regimen with nourishing products or building one from scrolls, scratch, Dime makes it easy. The work system, our all-in-one best-selling routine, includes a cleanser of your choice, toner, serums, and moisturizers, taking the guesswork out of skin care for your healthiest, happiest skin yet. Dime's commitment to clean ingredients and sustainable

packaging ensures every product is as gentle on your skin as it is on the planet. With thousands of glowing five-star reviews and a loyal community, the results speak for themselves. Revive your skin and give yourself the routine refresh you deserve by visiting dime beauty co.com. That's dime beauty co.com. Your best skin awaits. Hey there, it's Ryan Crest for Safeway. Now through February 25th, stock up on your favorite self-care items and save up to $3 shop in store or online for items like Old Spice Deodorant, always ultra-thin pads, Gillette Fusion Razors and Refills, Old Spice Total Body Spray, Tampax Pearl, and Gillette Mach 3 Razors and Refills and Save up to $3.

You won't want to miss out on these deals. Offer ends February 25th. Offers may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit safeway.com for more detail. As many of you know, the great Charlie Munger recently passed away. And a friend of mine sent me a video of his most powerful quotes, soundbites. And as I was listening, one stood out to me that I really wanted to share.

Charlie Munger said that the acquisition of knowledge is a moral duty. Basically, it's our responsibility to capitalize on the opportunity presented to each and every one of us. We owe that to ourselves, and we owe that to the world. And it just so happened that this particular message was said during a commencement address, talking to an audience of students who weren't ending. but rather were beginning the greatest undertaking of their lives. They'd be released beyond the confines of the campus to go navigate the world.

I remember being in that position, right, asking myself the question, well, what do I do now? Felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders, and actually, beyond that point, I found myself at that crossroads many a times. But being that there are really no right answers, in life, I find Charlie Munger's advice here even more meaningful. Because it's not about what you're supposed to do.

At least not when we zoom out. It's about a willingness to step forward and continuously pursue knowledge. Your personal evolution. It's to try things you've never tried so that you can learn from them. It's going where you've never gone so that you can stretch. beyond the boundaries you previously existed in. You owe it to yourself and the world to find what you love and shake that tree until all its fruit is gone.

And that's an adventure, not a right or wrong question. Life is not a checklist. It is one great journey. A journey in which we acquire knowledge we never had and become the people we are. knew we could be. It's a moral duty not to get it right because again there is no right. It's a moral duty because you have it within you to change things, to make an impact, to better the people around you. It's a moral duty because you will be a difference maker

in whatever arena you choose to step into. And just imagine forfeiting that. Imagine the greatness that would be wasted. If you looked in the mirror and thought to yourself, I don't know what that future looks like, so I'll stay here. I don't understand, so I won't go. I'm not where I want to be right now. So, hey, this is where we'll close the book. The endings are just beginnings in disguise.

Because they set you free to start writing a new chapter. to adjust and reimagine the impact that you can have on the world. Those students, the ones that Charlie Munger was talking to, they aren't done learning. They're merely at an inflection point. And by the way, I think that's why it's so painful to feel stuck, to feel lost. Because our souls want growth, but don't know where to go. We feel confined because the target is uncertain, but I can tell you this.

Sometimes knowing that the current chapter is over is enough, is all you need. Sometimes knowing that you no longer need to be where you are is plenty. Because it prompts movement. One who is willing to keep their feet going, who's willing to try, make educated guesses and adapt. That is someone who is constantly learning. Someone who's realized that the only way to assure success is not achieved is by standing still.

Worrying so much about losing what you currently have that you disregard the infinite upside. It is a moral duty to grow because you are a game changer. You have perspectives and ideas and abilities that will make this place better. And when you look around and think, me? No, you've got the wrong guy or gal here. That just means it's time for you to walk, to move, to create momentum, to stumble, to stumble into life until you find a little portion of it. You want to put a stake in and call your own.

And please, this isn't a... Life is rainbows, butterflies, and everything's magic message. This is a Find Your Thing and give it to the world message. This is a you can always be evolving message. And most importantly, this is a progress is happiness message. Because a life lived to the fullest is one where we are stretching and exploring. We're stepping out into the vast unknown and messengers. mapping it for ourselves and others.

It's your duty to acquire knowledge and allow that acquisition to propel you into the ether. It's your responsibility to not sit on your gifts, but bring them to life and create that ripple effect that will change the world. Reality is a mirror. reflecting back at you not the world as it is, but the world as you are. The idea here is that if you don't pause and remind yourself how much control you have over your own reality, over what you're seeing, you start thinking you're at the mercy of someone else's story, a character in a play that is not your own. You forget that in your own movie, you're the story.

scriptwriter. Or as Marcus Aurelius wrote, you have power over your mind, not outside events, realize this, and you will find strength. I recently heard this referred to as the mirror principle. But really, for obvious reasons, I'm more partial to calling it your world within. An echo of Tolstoy's classic line, everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks. of changing himself. And that is where our power lies. Or, using the same example, you can't change the reflection you see by shaking the mirror. You change the reflection by changing your relationship with yourself, by changing how you treat

and view yourself, which not only alters your actions, it alters how the world views you. One of the first things we notice about someone is whether they are confident, whether they operate with conviction and self-belief, we notice how they view themselves immediately. The greatest gifts I've been given from mentors and people I look up to in life, they haven't been material. No, they've always been subtle reminders that I set the guidelines and the world conforms. It's always been, hey, Eddie, if you only view yourself as someone who charges a little bit of money to clients, that's how potential clients will view you.

Eddie, if you surround yourself with people who think small, that's exactly what you'll become accustomed to doing. Eddie, if you don't believe you can do amazing things, people won't walk up to you and believe it for you. All of these have been reminders that the reflections that I'd created for myself at those points in time were limiting. The reflection I was allowing was narrow in scope. It was safe. It was small. And if I wanted more, it wasn't up to the world. It certainly wasn't a matter of crossing my fingers and hoping that that mirror would randomly tell a different story.

it was seeing myself as someone who creates a new picture altogether. And that could be a difficult thing to grasp, right? Like, you can't change the mirror at all. You can only change what you bring to the mirror. So what are some examples? What are some pieces in the past that I've worked on? One, first and foremost, imposter syndrome. One of the cool things about having speeches blow up on YouTube

before I ever gave a keynote speech on stage is that I started getting invites to speak all over the place. The flip side to that is that I felt like someone who didn't belong there. It happened too quickly. It was outside the comfort of my studio. It was like, oh no, the world's going to find me out. And that's what I brought to the mirror. And of course, for a while, that's exactly what the mirrors.

showed right back. I had to convince myself that I could speak anywhere, through practice, through affirmation, trudging through the mud of doubt and uncertainty, and earning a different reflection. I say that, not to pat myself on the back, but to demonstrate a battle fought mostly in private, where I had to rewire how I saw not the world but myself, how I saw my ability to navigate seemingly insurmountable things. It always amazes me how so much of any battle is merely confronting it with confidence. It's knowing that, hey, difficult or not, I belong here. And I'm going to figure it out. That's what I do. I think we all need to find a way to bring that to our personal mirrors.

And again, it'll feel weird. Good. It'll feel inauthentic at first. Perfect. Change requires a breaking down and building up. And breaking down never feels good. Now, I can give you another example, and I think this will certainly be relatable to most of you.

Not being able to see the gratitude in my life over the small annoyances, like something stupid or not ideal or disruptive, would just prompt the spiral. My Facebook getting hacked is a great example of this. I've talked about this before. My world ended for a few hours. I was so angry until I got it together and composed myself. It's like, Eddie, you need to be the type of person who observes,

who calmly collects the data and then makes a productive decision. Now, clearly I wasn't that, right? And in many ways I'm still working towards it. But I know that's part of the reflection I want. That's something I'm working towards every day. And you know what's helped me? Gratitude. Seriously, that's simple.

Three things in the morning I feel grateful for. People I have in my life. things I get to do, the work that I love. Whatever it is that day, I write it down. Because just thinking that way elevates my baseline to not just existing, but realizing how lucky I am. And I start from a place not of lack, but of abundance. And that puts things into perspective. So that when, you know, things do go wrong or the wheels do fall off the wagon,

And it's not the end of the world. It's one little trial or tribulation in the great play of your life, one that you're very happy to be in. And I could go on and on, right? Whether we want to call this the mirror principle or the creating of your world within or just merely obtaining perspective, the idea is simple. What the reflection shows you is directly. correlated to the things you've accepted or allowed in your life. And if you don't like the view, well, then adjust what you're allowing. Give yourself permission to level up, to be more, take more risks, to chase down the upside.

Reality is a mirror. And a mirror is an output. You are the input. You are where it all begin. where everything in your world takes shape. So give yourself permission to fight for a reflection that you're proud of. How do successful individuals get where they are?

People often look at those who have achieved at a high level as some unique breed or some kind of rare talent to be marveled over when in reality, nothing about their success is predetermined. They tirelessly fought and scrapped for what they have. You see, being great in any capacity starts very, very small and then gradually evolves. It's derived from the vision that you have of yourself, okay, having a goal and believing intrinsically with all of your being that you can get it and that you deserve it. This is what lights the fire to success.

It constitutes your beginning. And as you proceed towards these goals, towards these aspirations, you'll find that the biggest challenge you'll ever face will have nothing to do with the people around you. Your struggle won't come from another team, the person you're racing against, or students competing against you in the classroom. Your biggest obstacle will always be yourself. You are the reason you succeed and the reason you fail. It's your individual outlook that determines everything.

I mean, think about it. Every morning when you get up, you decide whether to be positive or negative. You can be optimistic or you can be doubtful. You can decide whether to be average or exceptional. Everything's in your hands. Because no one will ever make anything of value happen for you. Ever. You need to be the one to believe in yourself when no one else does.

And I'll tell you right now, there will be times when it feels impossible to do this, when it would be so much easier to conform to the expectations of others. But having this courage and this strength is what separates good from great, that ability to truly hold yourself to a higher standard, regardless of outside circumstance. You need to know that no matter what stands in the way of your dreams, it can be overcome, even when everyone and everything tells you that it can't. All you have to do is convince the person staring back at you in the mirror because everything else is minor detail. Let's talk about a point, a destination, what I believe to be a critical or the critical

landing spot as we go about our lives. The intersection of purpose and value. Where our personal loves and passions collide with the gifts that we are capable of of giving to the world. Someone once told me that if you're doing something you love, that it's not doing anything for others, it's just for you, it's not monetizable or adding external value, that's fine, right? It's often incredibly healthy, but it's also a hobby, right?

Not a job, business, or career. On the other hand, if you're doing something that does add some external value to others, external value to others, but inside it feels wrong. You're not at all passionate or excited about it. You're now robbing yourself. One, because you're exhausting your limited time on this planet going through the motions, and two, because if you aren't at all invested in or excited about that thing, there's going to be little incentive to innovate, to go above and beyond,

to find that ever-elusive value that hides in the fringes. So the answer, the goal, as far as I'm concerned, is searching and exploring until you find that point, that aforementioned intersection where you get both. Where you wake up excited, thinking about what lies ahead throughout the day and are simultaneously able to add value to the community at large. That feeling of being able to pour your heart and soul into something. While also knowing there is much at stake, it's extraordinary. The thing is, though, it's often a challenge to capture. I remember I was invited to do an interview years ago, one of the first I'd ever done.

And I still remember this question, right, to this day. How did you end up a writer and the speaker? Did you plan for it? Was this the goal? And I remember saying, no, it wasn't the goal. and he asked so you fell into it? Then I kind of said, yeah, that's about right. I fell into it.

That was essentially that. And as I look back now, that answer, even all of these years later drives me crazy, because it does such a disservice to the truth. That's like saying someone fell into their dream job. How does anyone fall into any role? No, life is about growing, learning, adapting and repeating the cycle.

It took me time and persistence to find that intersection of internal purpose and external value. And I talk about the journey a lot, so I don't want to go into too much detail, but very briefly, you know, I went from a corporate position where I may have been adding some value

but was pretty dead inside. I'd then move to, you know, playing acoustic shows and writing music around Boston. And it was an improvement. I certainly enjoyed that to some extent, but had a ways to go. And also the external value wasn't quite there. And then moved to writing speeches,

which I discovered writing was what I loved about the music. That was an epiphany. That was a light bulb moment. So I started writing more and more and more, like a crazy person, and started to finally feel that power of impacting others in a positive way. Okay, noted, right?

This is a good thing. Keep moving forward. I started moving on to making videos combined with writing and oh man, getting warmer, right? And by the way, video is scalable. So I'm helping and adding value to even more people. They move on to YouTube, keynote speaking, and ultimately the media company I have today. And so I look at all that, right? The whole process, pretty sloppy, right?

A lot of unforeseen changes. A lot of things I didn't expect or anticipate, a lot of poking and prodding. And every move was getting me closer to what brings me joy in my left hand. Well, I held on to what makes society a better place in my right hand, right? What adds value to those around me? I wanted to find that intersection, right? While cutting away things that I wasn't crazy about, right? I didn't like.

The so-called hobbies that I enjoyed but, you know, weren't going to be the true. that I took to impact or prosperity. So, no, this exact career progression was not planned, right, in any way. But this feeling, finding this spot in life, obtaining this sense of purpose was incredibly methodical. And so now when I'm asked that same question, I give a very different answer. And that's critical because it's hard to not have to not not know what the future holds. It's uncomfortable. One demographic I get a lot of emails from is

college grads, right? The whole world's in front of them and they don't know what to do. My answer is always the same. You don't have to know what the future holds. You're not supposed to know. The idea is to explore. It's to move closer to the things that make you feel alive little by little. While, by the way, simultaneously cutting away the things that, sure, were worth a shot, but after some exploration, you kind of feel like, eh, not for me. Right? It's a continual process of honing in. And looking for that spot where it's like, this makes me feel good. This is the starting point.

So now, how do I position myself so that I can add value to others while doing this? How can I be a light in this? Can I be a light in the world? And I believe wholeheartedly we all have that. We're all capable of that. It's just different for all of us and requires searching. We have to get over the fact that it's scary stepping off that ledge to navigate the waters of life, knowing that this just might be one of those experiences that goes awry.

But yeah, you put the time in, the energy in. And all you left with was the understanding that, wow, this definitely is not for me. And that's perfectly fine, right? It's like noted, now on to the next. I say all the time life is not a standardized test. Now, I like that metaphor because it dispels the notion that there is a simple right or wrong approach. That's not how anyone has ever arrived at excellence. Excellence is an experiment.

Excellence is a journey, and journeys take courage. Believe me, it might seem easier not to go. It might seem easier to stay where you are in order to make this or that person happy. To save yourself the short-term angst of not having a plan. But in the long run, if you're not happy and you don't, in some capacity, step into that unknown, you eventually come face to face with that word we all hear so much about regret. And that is how I see the process.

Saying no to what you want so that you can avoid this short-term discomfort is essentially picking up the phone and making an appointment with regret. The only question is whether the reservation is in two months, two years, or two decades. So why not set out in search of that remarkable place? That intersection of what you love and what lights up the world. What prompts you to jump out of bed in the morning? And what just might inspire others to do the same. When you are in doubt, take the question, is it possible and substitute it for how can I get there?

When overwhelmed, remember that you are not alone in your frustration or your uncertainty, that the world around you was built by people, men and women from all different backgrounds and all different places with all different stories. who took that light in themselves and didn't stop fighting, pushing, searching until it became a beacon, not just for them, but for those around them. I said it before, I'll say it again. We are all capable of that. That version, whatever it is in your specific life.

You can have that reality. You can be that person. But you must both believe it's possible and start moving towards that life-changing point.