Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - STOP NEGATIVE SELF TALK | Powerful Motivational Speeches | Wake Up Positive

Episode Date: December 19, 2022

"Greatness is not a function of circumstance. Greatness, it turns out, is largely a matter of choice" - Jim Collins

I put on my shoes, stepped outside, and as I made my way down the street for my midday run, I felt the wind at my back, tailwind. My first thought, well, nice, this is convenient. Especially running along the beach where it can be pretty windy. It's definitely a luxury to have wind at your back. Sure enough, my mind went, oh, but that leaves me a headwind when I turn around. and come back up the coast. My mind started to wander.

I started imagining what it was going to be like, turning around at that 6.6 mile mark. I was doing a half marathon that day and knew that the way back would require that I level up. And every once in a while, the thought popped into my head, sort of reminding me of the inevitable. And sure enough, the moment arrived. The sun pressing down onto my skin,

in the humidity wrapped around me like a blanket, I hit 6.6 miles, turned around on A1A, and there was that headwind. But the first thing I noticed was not the force pushing back against me. No, in that moment, I felt the breeze, the coolness. It was refreshing. And there, underneath it all, was my light-bald moment. What we are presented with day in and day out is a question.

It's a choice. Would the wind become my adversary? Something that, yeah, pushed me forward on the way down but then held me back on the way up? Or would it be what pushed me forward on the way down and then cooled me off as I made my way up? And if you think that mental alteration or perspective shift is just nuanced or too small to matter, I suggest you give it a go when you're doing whatever your equivalent of total exertion is, whatever your mental stressor is that pushes you beyond your state of usual comfort. When you're in the middle of, let's call it hurt,

whether it be physical activity or a personal situation entirely unrelated to athletics, how are you internalizing the world around you? It's become clear to me over time that winning during our most, trying moments comes down to mental shifts so small that they seem almost laughable in normal conditions. But your mind will always stop you before life will. So why not put yourself in a position to win? Everything around you is trying to help you in some capacity. Allow that to be the case. Remember that what you look for you'll find. So if you look for resistance and obstacles and adversaries, they'll be everywhere. But if you look for and seek out value,

you'll see that you are surrounded by nothing but value. Even those metaphorical headwinds become hands reaching out, working to cool you off as you make your way to greater things. So understand that when they arise, those headwinds, the ones that typically hold you back, They hide within them small winds. Small winds that will be the difference. The deeper one descends into chaos, the more important it is to find those victories, the ones hidden in plain view.

The ones that look to many like problems. But you'll know. You'll know just how malleable this world around us is. The world seems to provide not definitive but tools. So which will you pick up? What will you build with them? See, life is never happening to you. It's happening for you. So keep your eyes open, keep your feet moving, and remember that you will win, not despite the headwinds of life, but because of them. Because you've trained yourself when those around you, see can't and won't to find a way to pull from the chaos the very thing you need most

life gives you the canvas but you are the one who must paint when the run got difficult I would often count streetlights why because at some point I realized that it wasn't so much the immediate moment that was painful, as it was the idea that I had to continue on, a fear of the unknown. Our minds are brilliant, because they have the power to gaze into the future, to anticipate, to predict, and sometimes that prediction materializes in the form of stress and pain in the present. a pain that, let's face it, is manufactured.

See, the present moment may be uncomfortable, but it's manageable. It's always something we can harness and adapt ourselves to. But make-believe scenarios, the imaginary monsters we let in, well, I don't know how well equipped we are to handle those, so I've found solace in simply keeping them out. See, counting streetlights, it brings me to the now.

I can always get to the next streetlight. In fact, it's always visibly in front of me. It's tangible. It's real. There is no space for tricks or scary stories when I count streetlights. My mind's job is to focus on those stories. tall metal fixtures, and the body's job is to listen and move accordingly. And while sure, there is pain, it is manageable. When you look it directly in the eyes, not with regard to what it can be, but as it exists

now in this moment, we can always rise to be more than we once thought possible. These streetlights simply remind us of that fact. And so beyond this moment, when the running shoes are off, long after the finish line crossed, it's imperative that the idea remains that, yes, life will be painful and life can hurt, but it never gives you in one instant more than you can handle. And sometimes it might seem so. Sometimes it might appear overwhelming, but when we remind ourselves that we're seeing, simply borrowing pain from a future that has not yet arrived.

When we refocus on what is within our control, we empower ourselves. Our greatness expands and our strength intensifies. Because look, there's a time and a place for everything. And in our moments of duress, when the world is weighing down on us, I've found the answer to be thinking less and trusting more. And the next footstep transforms into not the detail but the story in its entirety.

Sure, sometimes life is about planning and calculating and strategizing, but sometimes life also calls us to put our heads down, Shut our minds off and find a way to move towards something greater. It's step, step, light post, step, light post. Demoting the discomfort from the star of the movie or the main character to a subtle observer. Sitting quietly in the background as you do what you were going to do anyway with or without it. Never forget how much control you have over the current moment,

and that our greatest pain is often masked in a fiction, a delusion. When we find ourselves stuck, it's because of a future that has one not arrived, and two is outside the scope of the task at hand. It's not because of what's a reality. around the corner that we survive life's trying times, it's because we dig deep enough to get to that next light post. That next day, that next stop, that next chapter.

Look, you will emerge victorious. Not because of the future, but the now. Because you realize your strength, shut off the world and conquer. your next step. Around 2011, I hurt my left arm and had to get surgery. So for a while, I was pretty limited as far as what I could do with my upper body. And that's really when I fell in love with running.

I started doing it almost every day. Sometimes those long runs outside clear my mind, sort of reset a little bit. And sometimes I'd mix it up. hop on the treadmill and do my favorite workout, which was a pyramid, right, where you break 10 minutes into four segments, four, three, two, and one, increasing in intensity with each segment, and then you start over. And that's where this whole idea comes from. It's this treadmill workout that I want to talk about, because there's a little ritual I picked up that I still implement to this day, and it was simple. At the very end of my workout or my run, I would always

add 22 seconds. My lucky number twice, two and two. So, for example, if I told myself, you know, the workout's going to be, you know, three pyramids or 30 minutes, I would stop running at 30 minutes in 22 seconds. And if I told myself it was going to be an hour, I'd stop at one hour in 22 seconds. Always tacking on that 22. And I don't really remember the first. first time I started doing it or even why. But like so many things that 22 second period organically became a habit, sort of evolved to take on a life of its own and would come to symbolize for me a little challenge. The idea that the end is never really the end. And no matter how tired I was or how bad I wanted to stop, especially when you can see that finish line in reach,

I could always squeeze out a little more. But there's always something extra to give. And you could certainly go down that 22-second rabbit hole, right? Just 22 more seconds. And then you finish that and you realize you can do just 22 more. And just 22 more. It's like this never-ending spotlight into how incredible we are as humans.

that our stopping points almost always are constructed. Rarely is there not an extra 22 seconds or 22-somethings we can endure. And not only that, I think there's a case to be made that our growth occurs in that final push. There's a ton of value hidden away in there. The stretching of the mind and body. the last rep that breaks down the muscle, the last few seconds of that run

that forced the lungs to work their hardest. Exhausting that last bit of energy and focus, you know, studying for an exam. Maybe that's where you confirm your comprehension and understanding of the subject matter. It's like when we are pushing ourselves, just outside the limits we drew up, we are simultaneously expanding,

those limits. And so over the years, I've adopted that mentality. And I look at myself in the mirror now, and I can see it. I'm not the same person I was a decade ago. Those little decisions to add on 22 seconds, they stack up, and they stack up in a unique way. Because it's not necessarily about the time. It's not the same benefit that, say, an hour every morning at the gym would bring. You know, obviously that would be incredibly valuable, but in a different way. I'm talking about mentally, an armor that we come to wear, an identity that gets materialized. It's how you see yourself and how you see the world. You understand how manufactured our parameters are.

And I get it. We have to stop somewhere, sure. But it's an acknowledgement that those somewheres are fiction. They are arbitrary. You weren't made to exist within them, but to stretch them, to recreate them. And that's an endeavor that is always uncomfortable. But as far as I can tell, always worth it. The strength to go a little bit further

than initially intended or designed is what will place you in a league of your own. And that's where I wanted to start. by bringing attention to the idea that there's always an extra 22 seconds and you are always capable of obtaining it. That is yours. Whether you choose to see it or not, it's an option, it's always an option, which sort of connects us to my next thought. If I know that's who I am, someone that fights for that 22 seconds. If I know that's what I'm capable of

and that's what lights me up, what about those times in my life when I had no desire to reach for the extra 22. Because sitting here, I can think of plenty. I can think of times when there was dissonance between my identity and my actions. Here's a quick story. This was a shift in,

in my life and my understanding of reaching for that little bit more. Right? When people ask me about my process, what I'm building or where I see myself in X number of years, I tell them I'm playing the long

game, right? Like, I'll sacrifice some short-term wins now to continue forward with a plan that I believe wholeheartedly will transform from linear to exponential, right? It's like Gary motto, you know, you're young, you have time.

And impact is not about succeeding at 34. It's about flourishing at 45 and 55 and 65 and 75. Like, that's fun to me. That's the exciting game to play. And it's methodical. The challenge is, you know, as you're locked into this big picture plan, you have to pass a lot of shiny objects along the way. A lot of, hey, look at them over there.

Maybe I should be doing that too. If that worked for her, will it work for me? Sometimes you forget to trust yourself and stay the course. And so a few years ago, I felt this pressure to pivot, to adjust focus. I'd been talking with some mentors of mine who were very successful in their individual fields and passions. And I thought, hey, you know what, it's time for me to just. start focusing less on the craft and more on monetizing the craft, right? The De Niro side of things, which is great and it's healthy, but here's the catch.

As long as you're doing it in a way that aligns with who you are. And so a few months go by and I found myself living in this overly sized and priced condo on the beach that I was going to use to impress clients. You know, making products that didn't excite me. talking to people I didn't really want to be talking to, living a life that was not my own, I'd lost myself. Right?

My love is storytelling. It's capturing life's seemingly overlooked secrets. That's what I get excited about in the morning. That's the value I want to share with the world. And look, money is important. It's necessary. It's freedom. But for me, it can't be about the money,

or I lose the money. lose the drive. Right? And here's the point I'm making where it all comes together. What I found is that when you're a stranger in your own body, there's almost no incentive to push for that little extra. It's like who cares about fighting for 22 seconds? I'm so misaligned.

I don't even want to be here. Right? That is the red flag. That's the indicator that it's time to adjust. Because if I'm someone who wants more, who pursue. and acquires more. And I don't feel the urge to do so. You know, it's time to change.

And I broke the lease, put everything I had in a car, went on a little three-month excursion, re-aligned. And if I'm not willing to suffer through that little extra, to go above and beyond, it's not for me. And so that's a big example. But it obviously manifests in smaller ways as well. Yes, you are someone who can. and will chase down the beauty in life,

who will transform that little extra into something meaningful, but you also have to position yourself and the world around you to make it possible. And when you don't feel that hunger inside, and this is the point you need to understand, it's not you, it's not broken hardware, it's not that you innately lack drive or confidence,

It's that you need to rearrange this scenario. You need to find alignment. Because I promise you if you want something enough, you'll be willing to fight for it, to hurt for it, to break boundaries for it. But you must first make sure that you're pointed at something you want, something that moves you. And here's the part where I remind you

of all those things you've already overcome in your life. Of all the times you thought your tank was empty, but you found a way. All the times you were hurting but kept moving. All the times you were broken, but put yourself back together. We are not told in school or at work how resilient we are. We're not told that we often stop thousands of 22-second period short. We aren't told that we're living at a 30% capacity, operating at a fraction of our potential,

we don't even realize the little miracles we've created along the way. A strong purpose and a willingness to stretch yourself as you pursue it will change your life. And that's not hyperbole, that is fact. If you want what you've never had, then push yourself further than you've ever gone. And we're talking little stressors,

expanding one step at a time, until you eventually look over your shoulder and see the miles you've traveled. Until you look at your reflection and see the evolution that has occurred. It was never just 22 seconds. It was a consistent and sustained shot at the walls you placed around yourself

for the opportunity to see them crumble. Understanding what you want, Sometimes requires learning in 1,000 different ways what you don't. Uncovering who you are means first experiencing who you are not. Finding the right person or people in your life calls for initially letting the wrong ones in. Life seems to demonstrate that there's a price to pay in order to get where we need to be. Patience, exploration, they're expensive. They exhaust energy, time, resources, but they are the only way.

As though one needs to dig a hole in their heart before fully understanding how to best fill it in, it's stepping back to leap forward. I've always believed the knows teaches more than the yeses, the chaos more than the We are tasked with taking our hurt and from it better understanding ourselves, holding our losses and with them finding answers we once overlooked, embracing our fears and alongside them becoming courageous. That's why maintaining perspective is everything. When we find that we've been slighted by life, we have to recognize that, Yeah, maybe we didn't get the answer we wanted in the short term, but still picked up something beautiful, something necessary.

We still learned what didn't work and saw where not to go. Because every step taken in one direction is a simultaneous decision to not go another. To embrace one option is to neglect its inverse. Every loss is a data point. Every time we fall, our worldview is shaped. And that's not just helpful, it's imperative. It's a brushstroke just as valuable as the ones derived from our successes, all culminating into one all-encompassing masterpiece.

And I look back at the mistakes I made. The time spent learning where I shouldn't be, the days with people who didn't lift me up, and I'm incredibly thankful for them, they brought me clarity. Like marble being slowly chiseled away piece by peace, they have left an understanding, a self-identity that takes shape one day at a time. So as we make our way through life, let's not fail to see the value in these short-term misfortunes,

for in many ways we are fortunate to have them. Perhaps the value lags. Maybe you don't see why the mistakes saved your life while you were making them. But they are contributing to the building up of a greater you. They are mitigating the noise and lighting up the path. So hold your head up high. And not just for the sake of doing so, but because you had the courage to step out into a world

that you knew would at times bring you to your knees. Hold your head up high because every time you stood back up, you made a statement. You declared that you wouldn't let discontes, comfort and obstacles deter you, but rather shape you. You were willing to learn where not to go in exchange for the privilege of taking your road, through the haze, across the war-torn ground beyond the hills, and toward a distant horizon, your horizon.